The biggest misconception in the bsd fandom ever to me is people constantly portraying Atsushi as someone who trauma dumps excessively when he canonically barely talks about it at all.
The entire point is that Atsushi does not talk about his trauma he’s just constantly thinking about/reliving it. He can’t escape the memories of his past so he tries not to acknowledge them.
He only mentions it when asked, either directly or when someone asks him to explain himself.
Atsushi doesn’t even give a cohesive explanation for what he saw while under Dogra Magra, he just apologizes to Haruno and Naomi.
If Lucy hadn’t had her whole “you’ve never suffered the way I have” spiel then I doubt even the audience would’ve gotten to find out about his scars
If Akutagawa never asked him how it felt for the orphanage headmaster to die Atsushi would have never told him that he’s been hallucinating.
In the omake where Kyoka asks him why his hair is like that it’s clear he wouldn’t have told her that unless she had asked.
In 55 minutes Atsushi very briefly mentions sleeping on a dirty floor somewhere to Kunikida because he was trying to explain and justify his behavior.
And the thing is that there are scenes that implies that the other characters see Atsushi behaving strangely and are visibly confused because they do not understand what’s wrong with him.
Remember, we as an audience get to see things about characters that the main cast doesn’t. Just because we see into Atsushi’s mind doesn’t mean the other characters know what’s going on in there.
Also little footnote here that I think this is a reference to the moon over the mountain but I digress
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i need his dick i need to put my hand in his boxers and feel the warm wet heat i need to tease his head with my fingertips rubbing slow gentle circles until he starts whining for me to quit teasing and then i need to take all of him in my hand and pump until he’s breathing heavy and gasping and i look down and see how hard his cock is in my hand and i just have to put it in my mouth and taste him and suck him until he loses it and his hands are wrapped in my hair with a firm grip and he’s trying and failing to keep from bucking his hips up to fuck my face and then he’s cumming all over my tongue and i can feel his cock twitching and oh god i love t dick so fucking much i need to go lay down
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what i want to say is that music is a thing of joy for most people. to love an artist or their work, to root for them, is mostly because the music makes us feel happy and supported and seen. sometimes it just makes passing the time easier. feeling saddened or hurt now is valid and real. a connection like this feels and is personal. you’re a human being with a heart. we all are. take care of yourself and look after yourself in any way you can. processing something like this can take minutes to hours to days. look after your heart and your well-being. take it slow if you need to. be gentle with yourself and be gentle to those you know, if they may need it too. let that gentleness and care echo.
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Sufjan Stevens | Will Anybody Ever Love Me?
Chase away my heart and heartache
Run me over, throw me over, cast me out
Find a river running to the west wind
Just above the shoreline, you will see a cloud
Tie me to a tiny wooden raft
Burn my body, point me to the undertow
Push me off into the void at last
Watch me drift and watch me struggle, let me go
Cause I really wanna know
Will anybody ever love me?
For good reasons, without grievance, not for sport
Will anybody ever love me?
In every season, pledge allegiance to my heart
Pledge allegiance to my burning heart
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Man I just love dressing crazy. Star-shaped eyeliner, jacket covered in bottle caps with smiley faces, bright pink glasses, piercings in my face. I thrive in the weird looks from strangers. I love being that person little kids think is a fairy and remember for years. I love giggling at myself while I make faces in the mirror.
To me, this is what it is to be punk. To make weird, messy art. To sing your crooked voice as loud as you can. To be the most beautiful ugly. To be that creature 8 year old you wrote stories about in their school notebooks. To be the greatest you you can be.
There is nobody on this Earth who can do you like you. So why not go out and be the best you the world's ever seen?
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I think I can't ever truly relate to anyone being like they wanna drop 9-1-1 cuz it's bad or cuz it's stale and running dry or whatever bc like well I think I've formed a blood oath with this show tbh. I can't leave her she can't leave me. she has picked me up off the bathroom floor and wiped my tears and rubbed my back and given me hot tea and put me to bed. even when I can't muster up the feral excitement anymore or engage in fandom and theories as much it is a soft warm comfort in the back of my mind. epitome of a comfort show. 9-1-1 u can be a tricky shit sometimes but they could never make me hate you.
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