#without causing a diplomatic incident

[copypastus]

@sjmvillainweek Day 5- The Villain Wins AU

Or what I wanted to happen during the 'revive Rhys at swordpoint' nonsense. Just winnow out. What are they gonna do?

[ensign-morrow]

So apparently our chief of security was kidnapped today, and the only reason I found out is because the guy I ate dinner with has a crush on her and can't stop talking about her.

I guess that's what you get when you spend all day tracking a circuit defect in the Jeffries tubes #outoftouch

[foone]

I nearly got kicked out of Starfleet because I caused a major diplomatic incident by revealing to the Arachnons that we have a video filter on whenever we talk to them over subspace.

Look, they're 3 meter tall spiders. They're friendly and all, there's been no conflict between them and other federation races, but they are still giant spiders. Half the human crew instinctively screams when they show up on the viewscreen. So some engineer rigged up a thing a while ago where instead of their actual image, it shows a video stream of some kittens. It's effectively audio-only mode, without snubbing them by having to explicitly day we don't want to see them.

And this worked just fine and kept the peace for like 70 years, but it all depended on no one revealing to them that we do this. And I had to be the one who screwed up and mentioned it.

Still, at least the Andorian Polar Research Station is pretty. Lotta nice auroras. It's a bit lonely though.

[notablenotions]

Masks of Noblity-Chapter 25

Henry had seen a great many romantic misadventures in his time as both servant to and sometime lover of Sir Hans Capon.

He had, in fact, lived some of them.

There was, for instance, the time Hans wooed a maiden deep into the forest to show her his “noble member,” only for Henry to have to rush in wielding a jar of balm because said noble member had been stung by a bee.

Then there was the unfortunate incident involving fire, two of the bailiff’s daughters, and a stolen tapestry used for modesty (but which caught a breeze and very nearly caused a diplomatic incident with Sasau).

Suffice it to say, Henry had thought he was unshockable.

Until today.

From the stables, where he was hosting the weekly Pebbles Book Club, currently reading A Maiden’s Reckoning: The Passion of the Tannery Widow, Henry glanced up just in time to watch Hans Capon himself drop out of a window, land in a hay bale with all the grace of a disgraced swan, and immediately spring up to bolt behind a stack of barrels like a guilty lover in a farce.

Henry blinked.

He turned to Pebbles. “That was new.”

Bartosch, seated nearby and in a losing argument with Pebbles about the emotional arc of the tannery widow, looked up and squinted toward the keep. “What the fuck was that about?”

Before Henry could reply, a voice behind him said, calm as a saint and twice as alarming, “The goose is agitated again.”

Henry jumped.

Jitka Capon stood behind them holding the book in one hand and a satchel in the other. She handed Henry the satchel like a midwife presenting a holy relic.

“I’ve prepared balms and oils,” she said. “For when you go calm him down.”

Henry opened the satchel.

He immediately closed it.

Bartosch snorted and covered his face with his hand. “Kitty, I know you’re trying to be helpful, but—”

Jitka sat down primly on the straw. “It’s book club, isn’t it? Pebbles invited me. I have notes.”

Henry eyed the satchel like it might explode.

“Jitka,” he said carefully. “Do you know what’s wrong with Hans?”

She tilted her head. “Well. I came outside just now holding the book, ready to join you, and Hans saw me, screamed ‘you don’t have feelings!’ and then jumped out the window.”

She said it with the deadpan weariness of a woman used to living in absurdity.

Henry couldn’t even argue. That was… yeah. That was Hans.

He sighed, closing the book to Pebbles’ visible disappointment. “Jitka… he’s avoiding you.”

She bristled slightly, curling her arms protectively over her bandaged hands. “Is it because of… this?” she asked, nodding to the excessive linen hives still engulfing her wrists. “Does it disgust him?”

Henry immediately shook his head. “No—no, not at all. Hans isn’t like that. If anything, it’s the opposite. It made him realize you’re a—”

“A human woman?” Jitka cut in, raising an eyebrow. “With breasts and a mouth and other goose-disturbing features?”

Henry coughed violently. “Basically… yes.”

She considered that for a moment, then sighed. “So he noticed I have tits and panicked. That explains the ‘sinner fleeing church’ energy.”

Henry rubbed a hand over his face. “Yes.”

Jitka tilted her head thoughtfully. “And the staring? At breakfast? I thought I had jam on my lip.”

“You didn’t,” Henry croaked.

“Ah,” Jitka said, nodding. “That’s unfortunate. I’d have preferred jam.”

There was a pause. Pebbles snorted.

Henry, feeling increasingly like a man being marched into battle without a helmet, said slowly, “Jitka… you have had the talk, haven’t you?”

She made a face. “Unfortunately, yes.”

Bartosch groaned in the background and muttered, “Not this again.”

Jitka straightened, tone perfectly neutral. “My guardian explained it using military maps. There were battalions involved. Siege formations. Something about flanking maneuvers.”

Henry stared.

“I believe the diagram had flags,” she added. “And a small illustration of a trebuchet.”

Bartosch groaned louder and got up. “Right. Wine. We need wine for this. I’m not surviving another battle plan sex talk.”

He wandered off toward the kitchens.

Jitka, entirely unbothered, picked up the book. “So. Do we think the widow’s decision to reject the tanner was truly about honor, or emotional repression brought on by patriarchal expectations?”

Henry gave her a look. “You just said ‘tits’ and handed me sex balm for Hans. You can’t pivot back to literary critique.”

Jitka blinked at him. “I can multitask.”

Henry sighed, rubbing his temples.

“Look, he’s not disgusted. He’s just… panicked. You were safe to him before. Now he’s noticed you’re—well, you. And his brain shorted out.”

“Should I be offended or flattered?” she asked dryly.

Henry shrugged. “Both.”

She eyed him. “And you’re not upset? About him… seeing me as a woman?”

Henry smiled. “I love Hans. Deeply. But I don’t own him. And loving me hasn’t made me stop being attracted to women either. It’s not a switch. It’s not mutual exclusivity. It’s... us. And frankly?”

He smirked.

“Your arse is a masterpiece sent to ruin good men.”

Jitka blinked. Then smirked back. “You should see it when I wear the red riding dress.”

“I have.”

They laughed. Pebbles snorted like he was judging them both.

Henry sat back, taking a long breath. “Truth is… I thought you’d come between us. That you’d ruin everything. But you haven’t. You’ve joined it. In your own terrifying way.”

Jitka looked at him, for once without a quip. Then she snorted lightly and rolled her eyes.

“Oh, please. He’s a silly goose with great boots and an overfondness for collars. I’m not interested in Hans. That part of things…” she waved a vague hand, “never really made much sense to me. You know that.”

Henry smiled. “I do.”

“So,” she said, pushing the satchel toward him like she was bestowing a sacred relic, “take the oils. Go… soothe your goose.”

Henry gave her a flat look. “You’re aware the balms are for—”

“Yes,” she interrupted. “He’s stressed. You’re in love. I’m very good with logistics.”

Henry coughed into his fist. “Right.”

Jitka dusted straw from her skirts. “I’ll prepare more balm.”

Henry, still blushing faintly, cleared his throat and muttered, “The lavender one, please.”

---

Saw some theories of KCD3 and fact historically Hans dies in the potential period which is sad so here's a funny chapter

[autisticlancemcclain]

“The Exoxins are very…” Coran purses his lips, searching for the word. “Particular, let’s say.”

Hunk cocks his head. “In what way?”

“They’re quite fixated on personal appearances. They have been known to refuse alliances in the past when diplomats don’t meet their… aesthetic expectations.”

Before Keith can make a slightly mean joke about keeping Shiro on the castle, then (it’s been too long since he has been humbled), Lance snorts. Without bothering to look up from his doodling, half slumped over his station on the bridge, he says, “Well, we better send Keefers. Only way we’ll get a guaranteed alliance.”

“Okay, asshole, real funn — wait.” Keith blinks. That’s not the insult he thought it was. “Did you just — are you flirting with me?”

Lance flicks brown eyes up to meet his, eyebrows raised, amused smirk on his face. “Have been for a year now, thanks for noticing.”

Keith’s jaw drops. He feels a blush climbing up his neck like he’s a fuckin’ kettle, boiling from the bottom up, because what.

“What.”

“Keith.” The rampant redness on Keith’s face must give Lance pause, because he finally turns his whole attention towards him, straightening up from his seat and facing him head on. “I thought you were just ignoring me. You’re telling me your dumb ass has just been — what, completely oblivious to it?”

“I’m not obvious,” Keith argues, strained. He’s well aware of the snickering behind him and chooses to ignore it. “Usually your flirting is horrible and obnoxious and gets you rightfully punched, so excuse me for not noticing.” He waits a beat, and then tacks on, “Or tied to a tree.”

He’s gratified to see Lance’s smug demeanour crack at the mention of the Nyma incident.

“That was four years ago, dipstick. I was seventeen. It doesn’t take away from the fact that you are so thick headed that you are incapable of taking a hint. Did you think I kept finding reasons to be shirtless around you for fun?”

Keith sputters. He had noticed that Lance was shirtless around him an awful lot, but in his defence he was putting his braincells more towards memorizing a broad back and a glittering belly piercing rather than, like, puzzling out why the fuck Lance wasn’t wearing a shirt.

“I thought you were — hot, or something!”

Lance grins wolfishly. “You think I’m hot?”

“Go fuck yourself!”

“Is that what you want to see?”

Keith makes a hoarse screeching noise in the back of his throat. It is echoed behind him, by all of his friends, actually, but for entirely different reasons, and he hates them all and they are all written out of his will.

Lance slowly stands from his seat, soundlessly stalking over to where Keith stands, leaning against a wall. Keith considers braining himself against a hard surface so he does not half to deal with Lance stupid sexy leer and sparkling eyes et cetera.

“‘Cause if it is,” Lance murmurs, placing a hand next to Keith’s head and leaning in close, “all you had to do was ask, baby.”

“I am going to kill you with fire,” Keith croaks.

Lance chuckles. “Sure, caliente.” He kisses Keith’s cheek and saunters back to his chair. Keith considers asking his lions to help him change his bayard into an anvil and chucking it at Lance’s face. It does not help his situation.

“Well,” Coran says awkwardly, after what can only be several minutes of charged silence. “the good news is that if we send you both that alliance is as good as guaranteed.”

[autistic-android42]

Star Trek TNG episode “Manhunt”

lwaxana troi: hey Jean-luc *winky face*

Captain Picard (internally): dear lord how do I get out of this without causing a diplomatic incident? Oh I know! I activate my ultimate cock blocker!

Captain Picard: you know who has the most excellent dinner conversation? Lieutenant commander Data! Hey data stop steering the ship or whatever you’re doing and come tell us all about the intricacies of cultural dining rituals!

Data immediately dropping everything: I am on my way captain!

*several hours later*

Data mid PowerPoint presentation: and that’s just present day Vulcan dining rituals, pre-reformation Vulcan culture had some very interesting dining rituals as well

Captain Picard: how interesting, tell us more!

lwaxana troi: please just kill me

Data experiencing pure android euphoria at getting to info-dump uninterrupted to his father figure: of course captain! :D

[marlynnofmany]

Downhill Speed

You know what's a shame? Wasted potential.  Like this new place we were doing business, which was all swooping walkways and ramps — a spectacular opportunity for hoverboard fun, except for the fact that it would probably cause a massive diplomatic incident. The locals were an exceptionally stuffy and dignified species. I couldn't tell if they walked that slowly out of choice or necessity, though the planters full of edibles leaves every few yards felt like a clue. These guys were always chewing, as if they'd run out of the energy to move if they stopped.

I don't know. Maybe they were just like that for cultural reasons. But they kinda did look like koala-sloths in fancy robes. 

And as much as I wanted to find something with wheels or thrusters to ride whooping down the walkways, I didn't want to get our courier ship blacklisted from this sector of space. 

So I just waited patiently while Captain Sunlight worked out the details, and I helped Paint and Mur transfer the pile of small boxes from their hoversleds to ours. I didn't even comment on the inefficiency of all these small crates and multiple hoversleds when they could have had them strapped together in a pallet. Maybe the things came from multiple houses. Not my business. 

But then. One of the locals dropped a box.

It landed on a corner and cracked right open, to a chorus of horrified gasps, and its contents rolled out — a single glowy blue sphere, all sparkly and beautiful, the size of a bowling ball and just as fast. It gathered speed down the ramp while locals cried out helplessly. 

Well if that's not my cue, I don't know what is.

I jumped on a hoversled and flashed off after it, kicking madly to catch up. This was more awkward than I expected. I was out of practice — it had been a long time since I zipped between college classes on a proper board — and this was definitely not that. The little hoversled clearly wasn’t built for speed. It vibrated under me like it was panicking about the velocity we were going, and I couldn’t blame it.

This ramp was a pretty straight one so far, which was great, because I had no real way to steer. I’d kicked to a proper pace, and now I balanced with both feet planted and both arms out like an absolute amateur. But I didn’t want to tip over. I was closing in on the ball.

It made an ominous rumble along the floor.

It was just two yards away.

There was a corner coming up.

The ball was one yard away.

I crouched.

And I grabbed it, tucking it against my chest with one arm while I clutched the edge of the hoversled with the other, sitting down just before I slammed into the clear wall at the corner.

That was some painful skidding. I put my feet down to slow things further, which ended up spinning me around, dragging my feet behind me. But I didn’t drop the ball. And I probably didn’t get any friction burns through my sleeve, though I’d definitely have to check that later.

For now, I was busy sliding to a stop and taking a few deep breaths before standing up. As my blood stopped pounding in my ears quite so loudly, the realization trickled in that people were making a lot of noise around me.

Good noise? I think. Whew.

It took a second to be sure, but those were cheers of praise. Either this ball was an important holy item, or the stunt I’d pulled to catch it was just that impressive. Possibly both. I wouldn’t know until I got back up to the top, because there wasn’t anyone nearby to ask.

But they were hurrying down to meet me, as much as their species could be said to hurry. I found the height adjustment on the hoversled and raised it to where I could tow it without bending down, then started the long walk back up. I held the pretty blue sphere close.

When the koala-sloths met me in the middle, galloping with an undignified flapping of robes, they thanked me profusely for catching the high explosive before it leveled the place.

Multiple responses ran through my head.

I ended on “You might consider better packaging for it.”

They agreed, taking it from me (to my relief) and pulling the hoversled as well. By the time we reached the top, our entire crew was going to town with bubble wrap on the other boxes, and Captain Sunlight had arranged a significantly higher delivery fee.

~~~

The ongoing backstory adventures of the main character from this book. More to come! And I am currently drafting a sequel!

[zeno-zero]

Roku killing Sozin will still lead to war.

No matter the decisions that Roku possibly makes, whether it is to kill or to be killed, he and the world will still suffer under the wrath of his blood nation. How, and why killing Sozin still leads to war? Let's consider Sozin's speech in Book 3, Episode 6:

“How dare you, a citizen of the Fire Nation, address your Fire Lord this way. Your loyalty is to our nation first. Anything less makes you a traitor.”

Even though Roku is the Avatar (specifically a diplomatic Avatar), who has to keep balance among the four nations of the world, he can't argue with already established laws and politics. It doesn't help the fact that being called a traitor is also a synonym to commit treason. After getting into an argument with him and almost getting burned alive by Sozin's fury of fire, Roku gets into the Avatar state and destroys a large portion of the royal palace, a home of many past generations before Sozin and serves as the seat of the Fire Nation government.

So, Roku not only committed treason against his country but also massive government property damage. Killing the predominant leader of his blood nation and has an influential position in their government and state, a bounty will surely set right on top of his head or is expected to be executed by tomorrow. Even without Sozin's rule, other relatives will take his throne and follow through Sozin's nefarious plans. However, I will acknowledge that Zeisan did attempt to try to overthrow Sozin, and canonically can take his place as the righteous Fire Lord but sadly it is proved to be a failure along with the previous Fire Lord, Taiso, who strongly believes that the Fire Nation's elites would not accept a nonbender as their monarch.

I do think the only difference is that while Sozin only started war on the day of the Comet's Arrival, tension will rise once more not only between the Avatar and his nation, but to all nations involved: since it is the Avatar's duty to maintain harmony among the four nations and that same harmony will go up in smoke till there's nothing but leaving ashes and destruction. It doesn't help the fact that his era is also recovering from most of the nations becoming increasingly selfish and aggressive, causing numerous small-scale conflicts & diplomatic incidents in which that's where Dark spirits comes into the picture, and horrible natural disasters that almost escalated into a huge (armed) confrontation between the Earth Kingdom & the Watertribe due to pointing fingers at one and the another out of accusations.

Something important to note: I was hesitating to post this so I kinda sent them first in multiple servers before feeling confident enough to post it here, lol! I love Avatar Roku with all my heart.

[theysherobinbuckley]

ugh stobin arranged marriage au........

The Harringtons are a wealthy family and they only have one son, Steve, whose terrible luck with ladies is talked about far and wide. He's a charming, good-looking, athletic boy, so many people think the reason he can't keep a suitor for more than a week must be some terrible awful secret, some insurmountable personal failing.

The ladies assure everyone they meet that no, Steve is quite pleasant to be around. He's attentive, diplomatic, polite, and always respectful. But... that's all he is. There's interest but no passion, friendliness without warmth, smiles that don't touch his eyes. He's not much more than a puppet pretending to be a real boy. And while that may please the fathers of potential suitors (and Mr. Harrington), all of Steve's failed arrangements felt they deserved a little more from their spouse. And Steve, ever so pleasant, normally agreed.

The Buckleys are really their last resort. Word has it that their daughter has been struggling to keep an arrangement herself; it probably has something to do with that nasty independent streak they'd heard so much about, not to mention the number of political incidents she'd almost caused by forgetting basic court etiquette.

The Harringtons are desperate enough to reach out, and the Buckleys, more than a little strapped for cash, are desperate enough to agree.

Steve, terrified of what his parents might do if this thing doesn't work out, is determined to make this relationship the one that sticks. Robin, on the other hand, swears that the ever-pleasant Steve Harrington must be hiding something, something big enough to scare off nearly a dozen women from a life of luxury.

And she's going to be the one who finally exposes him.

Obviously they become best friends and get lavender married etc. etc.

[pompomqt]

Journey to the West Chapter 68

Doctor Wukong is in the house!

Welcome back to this week's chapter of Journey to the West with @journeythroughjourneytothewest. This week, Wukong shows us he has talents in more area's then just demon slaying, so let's get into it shall we?

After their last stinky adventure, the pilgrimage is going great and they travel without incident until it's summer again, and they reach a new kingdom. When Tripitaka asks Monkey what Kingdom this is, Monkey calls him illiterate for not being able to read the banner that is whipping in the wind and is twenty miles away that CLEARLY says this is the Scarlet-Purple Kingdom. Anyways, a new kingdom means they once again have to get their travel rescript certified.

They are walking through the town, and as previously established, the three disciples are rather frightening looking and are gaining a lot of attention. Tripitaka handles this by just telling them to keep their heads down and keep walking, and not to start anything, even when people start throwing things at Pigsy to mock him. I feel bad for Pigsy, but it's also good that they didn't try that with Monkey. Eventually they are able to find the local College of Interpreters, which is a meeting place from all across the world. Tripitaka tells the others they can stay here while he goes to see the king and get their paperwork done.

After they get their rooms set up and have a meal, Tripitaka asks the steward if the King is holding court today. The man tells Tripitaka that he's in luck, since the King has not had court in a long time, but happens to be in today, and if Tripitaka hurry's he might still be able to catch him. So Tripitaka tells his disciples to stay here, while he goes to see the king, with an emphasis to not cause trouble, because the Tang empire has no diplomatic relations with this kingdom.

Tripitaka meets with the King to have him sign their travel rescript, however the king is more interested in asking after the Tang emperor, specifically how he came back to life after dying of sickness. So Tripitaka explains the plot of chapters 10 and 11 and how the emperor was able to come back to life because of a strongly worded letter given to him by one of his ministers to take with him to the underworld. The King is disappointed to learn that he probably won't be able to replicate that series of events, which is a shame because he also happens to be ill. Despite this however, the King still invites Tripitaka to have dinner with him.

We go back to the disciples, where Monkey has decided to ignore Tripitaka telling them to stay put, in order to go on a shopping trip with Pigsy. After all, if they are going to cook a good meal for themselves, they are going to need some more ingredients then what can be found here. Pigsy understandably doesn't want to go after how he was just treated in this city, but Monkey is able to lure him out with the promise of delicious food. And for the record, Sandy does in fact know that Monkey is just messing with Pigsy, and let's them go anyways.

So Monkey lures Pigsy further and further into the market, until Pigsy finally has enough and won't go any further, so Monkey just tells him to go stand in the corner while he does the shopping. While there Monkey spots a crowd forming around something, so he uses his superior vision to see that it's a notice from the king, saying that anyone who can heal the king can get part of the kingdom. Monkey thinks this sounds like a great business opportunity so he turns invisible and takes the notice, before planting it on Pigsy, and then heading home, leaving Pigsy to deal with the fallout.

Pigsy quickly discovers that Monkey set him up, once he's accosted by some officials for having torn down the proclamation, but he is eventually able to lead them back to Sun Wukong by telling them he is the one who is actually capable of healing their king. Once Pigsy is done yelling at Monkey for setting him up, Monkey tells the officials to bring their king to him, so he can give him a proper check up. So the some of the officials run off to tell the king the great news that the great monk Sun will heal him. When the King asks Tripitaka about his disciples and which of them are capable of the healing arts, Tripitaka honestly replies that they are all pretty much DPS players and don't know anything about how to play healer.

The King tells Tripitaka not to be so modest, and tells his officials that he's to weak to see Doctor Sun himself, so if they could bring him here instead that would be great, but be sure to treat him with the upmost respect. So the offical's go back to fetch Monkey, and before Monkey leaves to go see the king he tells, Sandy and Pigsy to be ready to accept a delivery of a lot of medicine very soon. With that cryptic message, he then arrives at the palace in style. Of course the palace folk are terrified of him, but he is able to gain their cooperation by threatening that the king could be sick for a thousand years unless he helps.

Tripitaka meanwhile is about ready to strangle Monkey for getting him into this mess, after all, in all the years they've been traveling together Monkey has never shown any medical knowledge. Monkey assures him that he knows a few remedies, and even if the king dies, all Monkey will be guilty of is medical malpractice, so it's fine.

With that said Monkey then transforms three of his hairs into golden threads so he can 'take the king's pulse' from a distance, so he can get to the bottom of his mysterious ailment.

Current Sun Wukong Stats: Names/Titles: Monkey, The Stone Monkey, The Handsome Monkey King, Sun Wukong (Monkey awakened to the void), Bimawen (Banhorseplague), The Great Sage Equal To Heaven and Pilgrim Sun. Immortality: 5 + 94,000 years Weapon: The Compliant Golden Hooped Rod Abilities: 72 Transformations, Cloud-Somersault, Ability to transform his individual hairs, super strength, Ability to Summon Wind, Water restriction charm, and the ability to change into a huge war form, ability to duplicate his staff, ability to immobilize others, the ability to put others to sleep, and the Fiery eyes and Diamond Pupils, intimidating horses, churning large bodies of water, sleeplessness, seizing the wind, enhanced smell, discerning good and evil within a thousand miles, Spirit Summoning, lock picking, object transformation, distance reduction, vanishing in a flash of light, super healing, transforming others, Invisibility, and Wind Immunity Demon Kill Count: 711 + Unknown Number of Minions Human Kill Count: 1039 God's Defeated: 23 + Unknown number Defeats: 7 Crime List: Robbery, Murder, Mass Murder, Arson, Theft, Coercion, Threatening a Government Official, Resisting Arrest, Assault, Forgery, Employee Theft, False Imprisonment, Impersonating a Government Official, Treason, attempted murder, failure to control or report a dangerous fire, desecrating a corpse, breaking and entering, trespassing, violating Tree Law, looting corpses, trading counterfeit goods, criminal threat, animal abuse, Assisting or Instigating Escape, Damage to Religious Property, contaminating a substance for human consumption, Identity Fraud, Disorderly Conduct and Joyriding Cry Count: 11 + 3 fake cries Mountains Trapped Under: 4

Current Tang Sanzang stats: Names/Titles: River Float, Xuanzang, Tang Sanzang, Tripitaka and the Tang Monk Abilities: Curing Blindness, making branches point a certain direction (allegedly), reciting sutras, pretty privilege, memorization, Heart Sutra, Meditation, and Being Heaven's Specialist Little Guy Cry Count: 35 Tight Fillet Spell Uses: 63 Paralyzed by fear: 6 Bandit Problems: 3 Kidnapped by demons: 11 Falling Off Horses: 11

Current Bai Long Ma Stats: Names/Titles: Bai Long Ma (White Dragon Horse), Prince of the Western Ocean, and third prince jade dragon of the dragon king Aorun Abilities: Transforming into a human, a water snake, and a horse, eating a horse in one bite, flight, Magic of Water Restriction, Singing, and Sword Dancing. Cry Count: 1 Crime List: Arson, and Grave Disobedience. Contributions to the plot: 3 Kidnapped by demons: 3

Current Zhu Wuneng Stats: Names/Titles: The Marshal of the Heavenly Reeds, Zhu Wuneng (Pig who is aware of ability), Zhu Ganglie, Pigsy, Idiot and Eight Rules. Weapon: Rake Abilities: 36 Transformations, parting water, fighting underwater, cloud soaring, size enhancement, CPR and Shoveling Demon Kill Count/Kill steals: 15 + Unknown number of minions Kidnapped by Demons: 7 Human Kill Count: 1 Failed Flirtation/romances Attempts: 4 Cry Count: 2 Crime List: Sexual Harassment, Murder, Kidnapping, arson, defamation, Damage to Religious Property, contaminating a substance for human consumption, Identity Fraud, Theft, Forcible entry, Disrupting a Funeral, Violating Tree Law and Arson

Current Sha Wujing Stats: Names/Titles: The Curtain-Raising General, Sha Wujing (Sand Aware of Purity), Sandy and Sha Monk Weapon: Monster Taming Staff Abilities: Fighting underwater, Cloud soaring, and fetching water from a well. Demon Kill Count: 1 + Unknown number of minions. Kidnapped by Demons: 5 Human Kill Count: 1 Cry Count: 1 Crime List: Breaking a Crystal Cup, murder, desecration of a human corpse, Damage to Religious Property, contaminating a substance for human consumption and Arson

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[hrizantemy]

Day 11 of ACOTAR Games: This or That

Who should have reacted more strongly?

Thesan: For Night insulting his authority in his court by attacking other High Lord, Lady and heirs, breaking the no-offence contract (Thesan was just a witness there while Feyre and Rhysand played court)

Helion: For Feyre asking invasive questions about his affairs and relationship with Lady of Autumn five minutes after meeting him

Your contenders: @achaotichuman @litnerdwrites @positivelyruined @yaralulu @umthisistheonlyusernamenottaken

On penalty: @fenrysmoonbeamswife @gwandas

Thesan’s reaction to the events in the court was incredibly subdued, which stands out as a major oversight given the gravity of the situation. Feyre and Rhysand certainly took the spotlight in their diplomatic dance, but Thesan was practically a bystander while the no-offense contract was broken by Night, allowing Feyre to launch a full-on assault on another High Lord, Lady, and their heirs. The fact that this wasn’t met with more immediate outrage is baffling, especially considering that Thesan was not only a witness but a representative of his court in that room. Feyre’s actions were far from a simple misunderstanding—they were an open insult to Thesan’s authority. Thesan, as a High Lord, should have demanded accountability for the breach of conduct. Instead, the tension was barely acknowledged, leaving the supposed unity of the courts to look more like a fragile, paper-thin arrangement.

It’s even more jarring when you look at Feyre’s earlier speeches, where she talked about showing the world their “real” selves and the importance of forging strong alliances based on honesty and respect. But then, in the same breath, she burns the Lady of Autumn, humiliates herself by having to serve wine in to Azriel in a situation that should have been beneath her, and leaves the actual court negotiations to Nesta, who was already dealing with her own set of challenges. Feyre’s impulsive actions should have had consequences. Thesan, as an impartial leader, could have stepped up to reinforce the integrity of the gathering, but instead, he allowed the insult to slide. This missed opportunity not only made Thesan appear weak but also undermined the purpose of the whole meeting—forming an alliance. Instead of upholding his court’s dignity, Thesan allowed Feyre and Rhysand to play at diplomacy while sidelining the very essence of respect between High Lords.

Thesan definitely should have reacted more strongly. His failure to challenge Feyre’s actions casts doubt on his leadership and sets a concerning precedent for how the courts handle disrespect. Had he held Feyre accountable, it might have shifted the entire dynamic of the meeting and made the other courts take the diplomacy seriously. Instead, his passive stance made it all too easy for Feyre to walk away without consequence.

Thesan should have absolutely banned Feyre and Rhysand from ever stepping foot in his court again. I mean, we’re talking about the literal breach of a contract, not to mention the disrespect they showed with Feyre just casually attacking another Lady, like she was playing a game of “Who Wants to Offend a Royal?”

Oh, and don’t even get me started on Feyre’s half-assed apology to the Lady of Autumn. Like, seriously? Feyre, after causing an international diplomatic incident by attacking the Lady and her heirs, has the nerve to throw out some half-hearted, “Oh, I’m sorry about the whole… thing,” like she accidentally knocked over a glass of wine, not, you know, starting a war.

There’s no remorse. No real acknowledgment of how much she just trashed any chance of maintaining good relations with Autumn Court. It’s like she thought a little, “Oops, my bad,” was going to fix everything. Feyre just sort of side-steps the gravity of the situation, tossing in a few “I didn’t mean to” comments as if the Lady of Autumn was going to just forget she was publicly humiliated by some half-baked apology and magically decide, “Oh, okay, that clears everything up. No hard feelings!”

The Lady of Autumn, meanwhile, is probably standing there, blinking in disbelief. She probably expected Feyre to at least pretend to understand the magnitude of what just went down. But instead, Feyre delivers an apology so weak it makes you wonder if she even knows how much damage she’s done. It’s like Feyre was so focused on her “real self” tour, she forgot to be a decent person to the people she was supposed to be building alliances with. I mean, imagine: “Hey, sorry I just ruined everything you’ve worked for, but here’s my apology. I’m not going to actually explain what I did wrong, but I hope this makes it all okay. Thanks for understanding!”

Feyre, you can’t just throw an apology like it’s some kind of magic fix-all when you’ve just offended an entire court. A little more effort would’ve gone a long way, but no, Feyre just handed out the bare minimum and expected it to be enough. What a move. What a move.

Omg, I’m so sorry I missed the deadline, life just got a little out of hand 🙈 Anyway, here’s a fun fact about me that literally no one knows: I have a bunch of half-siblings! Like, seriously, y’all, I could actually field a football team with all of them. I’ve lost count, but it’s definitely more than enough to make my family reunions chaotic 😂 Just thought I’d share that little tidbit since I’ve been a little MIA. Hope y’all are doing great!

[ultimateissuessimp]

Hate to be that guy but a male x cat king soulmate au. Where you can’t see colour till u meet your soulmate. Pretty please with a cherry on top. Ty 🥺

"Hate to be that guy" and then proceeds to request one of my favourite tropes. My sweet, darling anon - THANK YOU! Writing this was a joy and a pleasure!

Also, not to say anything, buuuut I would be more than happy to write a part 2 for this 🤭 But I didn't say anything, completely nothing 🤫

Oel ngati kameie, Nga Yawne Lu Oer (I see you, I love you)

The Cat King x Male Reader

Word count: 1,935

Warnings: None I think

One case. One little case can change someone's life like nothing else could. Y/N didn't know if for the better or for worse, because now he was standing in front of the Cat King alongside his friends. Edwin, of course as stubborn as ever, simply had to disregard everything that Y/N had said about staying as low as possible and used a magic on an animal. A cat to be precise if it wasn't obvious already. That's how they found themselves in the situation they were at the moment.

His eyes were nervously going all around seeing all those cats gathered behind them. All of them in scales of gray that he was so used to when he was seeing it for the -nth time throughout his life. So basically all of it. After the little showcase of what they were capable of with their previous victim, he was on edge. Edwin was trying to diplomatically resolve the issue yet the Cat King didn't seem to really be happy with any of his words. When he mentioned a talk in private, Y/N head whipped up and for just a moment looked into the Cat King's eyes who turned his gaze towards the young man, because of his sudden movement before they went back to Edwin.

Then, as if suddenly someone hit the pause button on him, he froze. Colours slowly started filling his vision and at the centre of it was him. Edwin. He was sure he had found his soulmate. So many centuries alone. On his own. Now he finally found him, his other half. Or so he thought at least. While Thomas was marveling at the thought of finding his soulmate though in the wrong person, the right one quietly gasped in shock as his vision slowly filled with colours too.

The Cat King teleported both Edwin and himself to his private room, away from prying eyes and nosy personalities. Somewhere where he could get to know his "soulmate" better. What he was like, what he liked, disliked, what was his favourite colour, why did he use magic on a cat. About the last one... Now that he knew, thought, that Edwin was his "soulmate" he was less angry about the incident the ghost caused. He was more inclined on letting the man go, not really, without a punishment.

-Well, I was supposed to punish you for your... Misdeed, but since you're my soulmate- - the Cat King started speaking, a huge grin on his face as he got slightly closer to Edwin, his hands outstretched a bit to the sides before the man himself interrupted him.

-I'm sorry? Soulmate? Surely not. I can't be your soulmate, I've been looking at you for quite some time now and I still can't see colours. Just boring, but classy, gray - he said, looking incredulously at Thomas, putting some distance between them.

-What do you mean by that? Literally the moment I properly looked into your eyes the colours... They started to just appe- - and before he could end a sentence again, he was stopped. This time by the subject he was talking about suddenly disappearing. His world was bleak and boring again. He didn't understand and so didn't Y/N when he blinked and instead of seeing colours he was so fascinated by, yet quite displeased with the choice of clothing he made the previous morning, since none of the colours matched, at all, he saw the familiar scales of gray.

Feeling defeated, the Cat King sighed. Yet an idea struck him. Since he saw colours, even if for a short period of time, that means that his soulmate has to be either of Edwin's friends that he made eye contact with. He just needed some time and after all find a punishment for Edwin. He wasn't keen anymore on letting him off the hook and, even so, had more motivation to keep him in town. If Edwin can't leave, none of his friends can leave either. Then he could find his soulmate he so longed for. That's why he "caged" the ghost in town with a bracelet that only he could take off after Edwin counts all the cats in Port Townsend. Two birds with one stone. Teaching Edwin a lesson to never again use a magic on a cat and also finally meeting his soulmate. Life couldn't get more perfect. Well, it could, but that will come with time.

When he sent Edwin back to his friends and his soulmate, the Cat King silently observed the group from the shadows, silently telling a few of his cats to follow the detectives so he could monitor what they were doing, were they were and if they were in any trouble. After all, he couldn't let anything happen to his little lover. Who ever it was. Y/N was having an internal fight over what to do with the newfound information about his soulmate. He was so curious, yet had to remain cautious and careful when it came to the person that trapped his friend and in a way threatened him. He felt conflicted.

Then the case of the lighthouse came up. Strange, a bit terrifying, especially after Y/N started hearing the voice of the Cat King, calling to him. It was so irresistible yet thanks to the boys, Crystal and Niko, he came back to his senses and took a few steps away from the ledge. When Edwin silently tried to sneak away into the woods, he followed him, sneaking away just as silently as him.

He saw the cat that they were following an immediately understood, his heart skipping a few beats and making him stomp on a tree branch which in a chain reaction made Edwin snap his head towards him and the cat stop in its track. He smiled awkwardly and waved explaining that he was simply going on a little walk, but obviously Edwin didn't believe him.

-What don't you understand I will come back in a few minutes?? That was NOT an invitation to follow me! - Edwin whisper yelled at Y/N, a mostly annoyed look gracing his face before he turned around to follow the cat once again, making the man behind him stumble slightly when he tried to catch up quickly.

-Oh come on, you're being secretive, you're sneaking away and you're expecting that I WON'T follow you? Really Edwin? You're my friend. I'm worried - Y/N said, slightly out of breath, because of the jog he had to perform after the man in front of him.

-While appreciated, very much not needed. I'm fine - Edwin replied, looking back only for a second with a serious expression. They got to a clearing and saw no one other than the Cat King. Well, the man himself only saw Edwin at first, Y/N staying a bit back in nervousness.

Still no colours while looking at the ghost. Disappointing. Then the cat that dragged Edwin, and accidentally Y/N too, over to its king hissed and pawed at the leg of Y/N's pants, making him slightly flinch and take a step to the side, revealing himself completely to Thomas' eyes.

-Well look at what the cat dragged in! Aren't you a jewel - he said with a cocky grin, going around Edwin to stand before Y/N and taking his chin into his hand to take a better look at him. That's when their eyes met and the magic happened.

Instant reaction, colours bursting all around as they stared, wide eyed, at each other. There they were. "The most gorgeous of eyes" was the first thought that came to both of their minds. They completely forgot Edwin who was now staring in confusion at the scene before him, yet unsure if to interrupt or not.

-I see you - the Cat King said quietly, almost unlike himself at all, mentally adding "and I love you". He thought that if he said that out loud at that moment, he would scare away the poor guy. His hands cupped the sides of Y/N's face, holding it gently like the dearest of treasures he owned and in a way it was true. Although he didn't own Y/N nor his heart, not yet at least, the man himself definitely already owned Thomas'. Maybe without even knowing it.

-And I see you - Y/N replied, his breath caught in his throat as his wide eyes frantically looked around the Cat King's face, noticing every detail, every discolouration and adoring each and every shade that appeared in his eyes.

-Surely not-... Are you seeing colours, Y/N? - Edwin suddenly piped in, completely ruining the moment, but he couldn't blame him or be mad at him. He would be confused as all hell too if he saw his friend have a quite intimate moment with someone who made his life slightly more impossible to get through.

They turned to the ghost detective, a massive grin, like never before, on Thomas' face while a shy smile graced Y/N's. Obviously the Cat King, the man that he was, immediately wrapped his arm around his soulmates' shoulder, keeping him close to himself as if he was afraid the man would suddenly disappear like the colours did before he realised Edwin wasn't his soulmate. He never wants to feel what he felt at that moment again.

-Why, my ghostly friend. This adorable specimen over here is my soulmate - he said proudly, keeping close to Y/N yet not in a possessive way as if he was afraid Edwin would suddenly try to take him away for some reason, but more in a protective way. Physical, psychological, emotional, it didn't matter.

-Soulmate?? Surely you must be having a laugh! Right Y/N? You still can't see colours right? - Edwin asked, hands on his hips as he stood there, expecting only one possible option in his mind: a positive answer to his question. Yet he couldn't help the way his eyes widened and his mouth opened a little when he saw Y/N smile sheepishly at him and quickly look away. - We will talk about this later. There are 142 cats in Port Townsend. Now take this off - Edwin added, this time speaking to the Cat King which only rewarded him with a condescending chuckle.

-There are absolutely not 142 cats. Keep counting the cats, Edwin - Thomas said with a smile before swiftly turning himself and Y/N around so they could walk away and talk about their newfound relationship, completely leaving the ghost behind.

-This is absurd! How can this make you happy?! - Edwin shouted after the pair, but mostly the Cat King, annoyed out of his mind at the behaviour the man was presenting him with.

-Well, it keeps you in town, with you sweet Y/N over here and thanks to that I can get to know my soulmate better! - he answered with a cheeky smirk and a wink sent Edwin's wave, adding a little wave with his fingers while both of the men left, in a way abandoning him behind. You'd think Y/N would notice his friend staying back, huffing and puffing about being left alone, but he was so absorbed in looking around and taking in his surroundings, the colours that he payed half mind to where he was even going. At that moment all that mattered to him was the fact that he could finally notice the beauty of the world around him and it was all thanks to just one person. Destiny works in the most mysterious of ways.

[rebelspykatie]

RWRB Steddie AU - Part 1

Wayne Munson who accidentally won the presidency running on a progressive working class ticket. Eddie Munson, the first son that causes international incidents without even trying. Like the time he made a crude hand gesture towards a foreign dignitary thinking he was saluting them. Or the time he connected his phone to the speakers during a dnc event and blasted Metallica through the entire arena. Or the time he knocked over a child on the lawn of the White House during the annual Easter egg hunt and had to issue an apology to a five year old for stealing their eggs. 

Wayne has reprimanded him more than he’s spoken in front of Congress. The secret service hates him, especially Hopper, who has to drag him back inside when he tries to escape down the trellis and cockblocks him from flirting with the barista at the Starbucks right outside of the White House. 

But nobody hates him more than Prince Steven. He doesn’t even understand why Steve hates him, only that their first interaction was disastrous, leaving Eddie fuming and confused. He remembers seeing Steve all over those teen magazines before Wayne had any political aspirations, his now gorgeous locks once too big for his tiny head and hazel eyes staring back at him from the glossy pages. Gareth never let him hear the end of it when he found those magazines tucked away under his bed, a collection that only grew over the years as Steve got more attractive.

The frosty reception from Steve had Eddie doubting every good thing those magazines ever said about how charming the prince could be. Sure, not a single hair was out of place on his stupid head and his polos were ironed within an inch of their lives, but his smile was fake and a bitchy retort slipped out of his mouth before Eddie could even introduce himself. 

He gave up on playing nice after that, not heeding his Uncle’s advice to stay away and not cause another international scandal while he was trying to make a deal with their prime minister. He practically begged Eddie to keep his big, dumb mouth shut.

Which is of course why The Incident happened. Eddie was a bit too drunk at a dinner for diplomats and their families. He approached Steve and started going on about the monarchy, a bit too loudly, where a very nosy reporter could hear. And that reporter wrote a scathing article about the first son not believing in tradition and how he was trying to undermine the authority of the crown, dredging up old tweets about how useless monarchies are and how Steve is handed things on a silver spoon. 

Wayne’s deal is in jeopardy, so he’s sent to smooth over international relations with the crown, which is a horrible idea considering Eddie’s track record. Staged photo ops have always made Eddie uncomfortable, but he sucks it up for Wayne. He winds up enjoying himself more than he thought possible in Steve’s presence because one of their PR stops is at a teen center where a group of kids regularly plays dnd. 

If it weren’t for a swift tug on the back of his suit from Hopper, Eddie would be standing on the table flailing around about a campaign, having already forgotten about the swath of reporters following them around on this tour. Steve doesn’t appear to know anything about dnd, but the little curly headed boy with an infectious toothy smile keeps tugging him around, talking a mile a minute while Steve fondly rolls his eyes. It’s the most relaxed Eddie has ever seen him. 

He learns that they’re both insomniacs during that trip, stumbling into the kitchen at 2am only to find Steve already there, riffling through the pantry. It’s the first time he’s ever seen Steve without the ramrod straight posture, notices the circles under his eyes and the way he’s always got a line of tension in his jaw. They come to some kind of truce in the dark of night over twin bowls of cereal. Something inside of Eddie unfurls at that, lets go of whatever weird grudge he was holding after their first interaction. 

It starts with a text. Steve sends him an article with the most ridiculous picture of Eddie, asks if he wakes up looking like that every morning. They’re teasing each other, taunting remarks about their status, realizing they have more in common than they thought. All summer, Eddie’s eyes are glued to his phone, anticipating texts from HRH (his royal hairiness), late nights dedicated to learning everything about Steve. Chrissy, the vice president’s daughter, corners him before the annual Halloween Party, forces him to invite his new friend Steve. She says it with a tone he doesn’t really understand, but it’s one that brooks no argument.

Maybe he learns all too well what Chrissy meant when it’s close to midnight and Steve pushes him against a tree outside and kisses him so thoroughly Eddie’s lost all oxygen to his brain. It changes the course of his entire life. He can’t stop thinking about it, feels the phantom taste of Steve on his tongue, but Steve isn’t answering his calls and Eddie doesn’t get a chance to corner him until a charity event almost a month later. 

They take each other apart that night, spend hours learning each other's bodies. Confessions spilled into the sheets they’re tangled in. Steve admits that his father arranged for him to be seen with Nancy Wheeler, who he has no interest in. They decide to try something casual, see each other when they can, get some much needed relief from the public eye. But Eddie’s never been the casual type, and he doesn’t think Steve is either, not after their nightly talks. He falls hard and eagerly hopes for more every time they meet up, wishing that Steve wouldn’t flee from his bed the next morning. 

Wayne’s pretty busy, running a country and all, but he eventually puts the pieces together on Eddie’s disappearances and his trips coinciding with events where Steve is present. His uncle knows him better than to think they’re just friends. Eddie never really had to come out to his Uncle, but they do have an intense talk on whether he’s ready to be perceived in that way by everyone in the world, Wayne apologizing for putting him in the spotlight. 

But Eddie feels forever about Steve. And Wayne’s presidency brought him to this man, to the love of his life, so there’s no way he could be upset about any of it.

If only Steve felt forever about him.

Part 2

[anonymoushouseplantfan]

Things that "allegedly" happened at the Aus tour that might have caused William to initiate the royal foundation split asap -

1. Jason stayed back in London at KP and did not accompany the couple to Australia. Quite a bit of the HnM staff went to Australia but point of contact the remained Jason in London. The harkle shenanigans were directly reported to Jason at KP during this time. And maybe Jason talked to William while Harry was away

2. Jessica accompanied Meghan as her stylist. But essentially Meghan and Jessica treated it as a holiday and wanted to do holiday stuff even though the couple's schedule was packed. Rumours are that Jessica/Meghan billed Clarence house for this styling expenses.

3. Meghan sort of sabotaged Invictus and wanted to be there with Harry at every Invictus appearance and give a speech as well. Harry in the end, ditched Invictus and only did a couple of appearances to give a speech. But did not meet with the organizers or the participants. While this is not related to RF or KP directly, it showed bad faith. Now we know they did mistreat David Beckham.

4. Jessica's husband Ben had also come over from Canada with a crew. This was done in the garb of covering invictus but rumours were that Meghan wanted to do an exclusive interview about her pregnancy. The staff put a stop to this. Seems like this was a similar arrangement to what the couple eventually did in SA with Bradby and the "no one asked if im okay" interview.

5. Meghan's people had kinda roped in Jaguar to be Invictus sponcers and arranged a Jaguar to be gifted to Ben as a thank you gift for the exclusive interview with the Canadian network. Staff got to know and put a stop to it becoming news. Rumours are that Ben then flew back, but still got the Jaguar.

6. Meghan did not like staying at the governor generals official residence. Esp since Jessica was with her. She wanted the whole house as opposed to a wing. Jason and the KP team had to sort that headache out and smooth it out with the Australian team. Meghan remained mad.

7. She had an argument with the Governor generals wife, allegedly over staff treatment. rumours are that Meghan used the F- word and rolled her eyes. Happened in front of KP and aus staff. This was pretty much a diplomatic incidence and BP+govt got involved.

8. She wanted to accompany Harry at every one of his solo engagements. This caused quite a bit of hassles last minute. They were late to nearly all their engagements.

9. The blood diamond earrings situation happened. She wore the earrings without letting the staff know. KP/London staff were told one thing and issued a statement but later were told by staff in Australia about the true provenance. From a diplomatic pov this was a very bad look but Meghan said she did not care.

10. Tea throwing incidence happened and tea allegedly spilled over one of her PAs. That PA was being bullied by Meghan for a while and decided to leave. She was paid and an iron clad NDA had to be signed. But this incidence became quite an big legal issue for KP and there was allegedly a super injunction about this.

11. Jason decided to officially forward the bullying complaint to Simon case, BP HR and CH in writing. And maybe talked to William because staff's mental health was at stake.

12. She walked out of the UN women engagement after 10min and berated her staff, while at the venue, for arranging this. She allegedly ripped her Amy and her female body guard a new one infront of everyone, including royal rota. Amy cried. And the female bodyguard handed in her resignation that day.

13. She allegedly skipped/ditched some engagements to go to a spa/resort with Jessica. This caused some embarrassment because a lot of people had put in a lot of time and efforts into making these happen- reporters, organizers, local authorities, security, attending public and staff were all left embarrassed.

14. She was merching throughout the tour. She had arranged for merching deals and freebies and the staff wasn't made aware. Ethically, this caused quite some problems for KP. Gifts were also accepted in Australia personally by the couple against staff advice.

15. The pricetag on one of her dresses was left on when she walked out of a plane. She was embarrassed and ripped into her assistant for that. That was a merch which went wrong for her.

16. The couple was rude to the royal rota throughout. Even though the rota had been previously briefed about the kind of coverage Meghan wanted. Jason had to frantically be smooth things over constantly from London to ensure positive coverage from the press.

17. At least 4 members of meghans staff handed in their notice while on tour. This got back to KP/William who felt they had to act asap.

18. The couple constantly rowed while in Australia, and staff was put in an impossible sandwich situation while dealing with two. Both H and M were constantly on social media checking commments and were issued that public was criticising Meghan. They constantly telling staff to cover social media and clab back, instead of doing actual work.

Thank you so much! I remembered it was a disaster, but I’d forgotten some of the details.

They also took some vacation days at a resort, and there were rumors it was a freebie. And she made that speech claiming she’d paid her way through Northwestern and her dad and sister clapped back at that.

It really was a nightmare. I smh whenever Harry claims his family was jealous about how well they did in Australia.

[wolven91]

Secret Scritches

The negotiations hadn't gone well.

Nearly two years after the 'Sol-3' Incident the felinoids were ready to take a far greater role within The Galactic Community but were struggling to come to amicable terms with the galaxy spanning organisation. Howard had been a trainee diplomate back on Earth, barely out of university and only just beginning his career in the murky world of politics when all the politics he knew about got wiped out. Still, as far as he was aware, this was the first time a human had been allowed to sit in and at the very least observe and the skills were transferrable.

The Community representative had stepped out of the room in disgust at the felinoid's expert handling of their usual, one-sided contract they point blank refused to sign. The Galactic Community wanted closer ties, the external ursidain territories had been trying to advance into felinoid territories and causing an embarrassment for them, but the slippy felinoids had been able to resist them, even push them back.

By signing the contract, it would emphasize trade over raw resources and the ursidains would realistically be better off simply choosing to trade rather than take. The contract was of course skewed significantly in The Community's favour. Market prices were practically slashed for them, making the deal sour in the Felinoid's eyes.

The Felinoid sat across the table and stared at the human diplomat who gave her a flat smile.

"We are above this." She stated flatly. The orange and black stripes of her fur were very pretty in the human's opinion and reminded Howard of the tigers of old. It was mildly intimidating to be sat across from one, especially when she saw Howard as part of the problem, since he had walked in with the Community representative.

The human sighed and nodded. He didn't disagree, but humans only had 'soft power', influencing people or individuals, not actual policy. It was useful in it's own right, but humanity couldn't get an actual seat at the table yet. The man's leg's ached, so he stood from the table to try and stretch them.

Saharhan, gracefully stood as well, seemingly out of respect or manners, but she also joined Howard as she stalked over to the large, wall to wall, ceiling to floor window. Like all felinoids, she walked on her toes, while her hips swayed from side to side in an exaggerated manner. The thick, stripey tail coiled and flicked like a snake. Howard was hit with the idea of what it would be like to touch it.

The felinoid Saharhan stood a good head and a half taller than Howard, her negotiations had been clear; she wanted to impress that she was intimidating and would not easily cow to other species just because her government was willing to open talks. If the deal was not favourable, then they would continue as 'just' a member.

The alien stood to his side, as close she could without being pressed to his side. Howard blinked when he felt the flicking tail briefly grace the back of his legs. Before either of them spoke, the appendage flicked round to the front, where Saharhan grasped it and smoothed the fur along it.

"I'm glad they decided to take a break. I think everyone was digging their heels in somewhat." Howard admitted, trying to release the tension that had built up in the room. There was a chuckle from the alien.

Saharhan smiled and released her tail before placing a large paw on his shoulder. The leather pads brushed the cotton of his shirt and the claws subconsciously extended as she rolled her own shoulders to ease her tension. She was so fluffy; every strand of her fur was expertly maintained. Despite the negotiations already being several hours long, it seemed as if she had just stepped out of a spa. The towering tiger-like creature smiled down at the human.

"I understand what they are negotiating for, but we are a proud people. We know who is above and who is beneath us." The diplomate admitted with honey-like words. Howard noted it was strikingly softer in tone than anything he had heard from her all day. Still, this wasn't the first felinoid or even the tenth that Howard had dealt with in the short time that humanity had been in the stars and something she had said struck him as odd.

The human looked at her with a suspicious side eye while Saharhan cooly watched him back, he had her full attention.

"Who hell do you consider 'above' you?" Howard demanded in disbelief.

She barked with laughed and fixed the human with a fanged grin.

"No one, of course." Her head tilted as she seemed to see something within the human. "You are wiser than what The Community has told us, it would seem."

The human nodded as he noticed a tuft of fur that was sticking up and out messily on the top of her paw. He reached up and stroked along the grain of her fur, brushing it flat over multiple strokes. It sounded about right that The Community would underestimate humanity. A single person, regardless of species or race, treated humanity has equals. The moment that administrators or governments got involved, they simply didn't know how to handle or what to expect from humanity.

Oh sure, some humans hadn't helped matters by stealing crafts or accidently blowing them up, but for the most part, the people just wanted to live as equals and seek out a life. Still... merely disappearing and going humanity's own way was not an option. Howard himself knew how quickly pirates reacted to a lone or even a small group of humans. A community would need one hell of a fleet to protect it.

Unbeknownst to Howard, Saharhan was smiling and had closed her eyes at his idle petting of her fur. He couldn't have known that she was inches away from suggesting he come to her quarters later that even to strength their two race's bonds. It was worth laying the groundwork in her eyes...

"Keep doing that and we'll open fair trade for the humans at least." She murmured, forcing her arm forwards until his hand brushed into the deer, softer pelt of her arms. Howard smirked and rather than just brushing the fur, instead he dug his fingers into the pelt, scratching at the warm flesh below. The felinoid actually started purring.

"Huh, I thought it was a myth that you 'purred'." The human admitted. He paused and her eyes flicked open. Without a word, the diplomat with enough authority as to declare war on behalf of the felinoid people, bent at the waist to lower her head, so that his hand was in the perfect position.

Howard reached the remaining few inches and began scratching her round, fluffy ear. His fingertips scratched along the base and back of the ear, while his thumb pushing into the white pelt of the front. The alien's head turned, and she leant into his hand. Her fur was amazingly soft and thick. He watched as the strands ran through his fingers.

Neither heard nor noticed the door to the private room opened behind them.

[dark-elf-writes]

Manfjdjjsjshshs

You know those like letter exchange programs and sister school things? One of those between Earth and Vulcan so Kirk and Spock are childhood penpals and it includes Spock getting increasingly concerned by what Jim isn’t saying as much as what he is saying, Amanda who thinks their friendship is the cutest thing she’s ever heard of, and Jim who eventually tries to run away to Vulcan and makes it to the Embassy before someone calls Sarek and poor Sarek has to figure out how to collect a child that isn’t his on another planet without causing a diplomatic incident or getting him sent back to an abusive home.