lol arthur realizes with the other knights after watching merlin flirt and being hit with a wave of deja vu: holy shit you asked me out
merlin and the rest of the knights around a campfire after leaving a village bc lancelot and leon somehow started a brawl in the tavern: ???
arthur points at merlin: after valiant! you asked me to buy you a drink! you were asking me out!
merlin is busy cooking dinner and confused out of his fucking mind: what???…..valiant….oh the knight with the snakes.
gwaine who was slightly tipsy now stone cold sober and sitting up straight against a tree: wait. explain. what do you mean merlin asked you out??
arthur snaps his fingers as he recalls the memory: i apologized for sacking you and you said that if i bought you a drink we’d be even.
merlin now remembering how he had stumbled into camelot, picked a fight with a pigheaded bully which quickly turned homoerotic and flirtatious, and continued their teasing-flirting for days before merlin shot his shot and asked the prince out only to be rejected: oh yeah, i forgot i did that…..wait, you mean you didnt realize what i was asking?
arthur: no?? we argued everyday, how was i supposed to realize you were asking me out??
merlin now abandoning the dinner and staring across the camp at arthur while the rest of the knights watch their back and forth like a game of tennis: to you we were arguing, to me that was very much flirting. i thought you were flirting back so i decided to ask you. then you rejected me
arthur, mentally beating his past self up for fucking up their chance: i didn’t reject you!!! i just didn’t realize what you were asking me. how was i meant to? we fought every chance we got
leon, nudging elyan, glee and excitement riling through him: its happening!!! its finally happening!!! seven long, grueling years is finally paying off!!!
merlin, realizing the misunderstanding and acknowledging the fact that he wasn’t rejected, his flirtations just weren’t noticed - realizing he still has a chance: oh…oh i see. arthur, my dear, our fights were extremely flirtatious. need i remind you of what you said? “do you know how to walk on your knees? would you like me to teach you?” or “i could take you apart with one blow”
arthur, mental capabilities at an all time low: m…my dear….?????????
merlin grinning devilishly as he realizes that his flirtatious persona he had hidden away after falling head over heels for arthur can make a come back: that is what i called you. should i call you something else? say…mine?
percival gags in elyan’s ear: cheesy
elyan hides a laugh: at least they’re finally getting somewhere. better than the hopeless pining
arthur, flushed from head to toe: ah uh no um im uh
merlin thoroughly enjoying himself: oh come now, your majesty. use your words.
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i recognize that simon and edwin meeting and parting in hell is narratively very good and provides closure for all. but imagine if simon had agreed to try and escape with edwin. and charles doesn't have time to really question it, because anybody who likes edwin is aces in his book and it's hell, they need to leave. (edwin, out of courtesy to their third companion, puts his plan to confess on hold until they've escaped.)
suddenly the edwin harem of "supernatural boys who all hate each other but are attracted to that negative rizz" gains another member, and at some point edwin is going to have to mention that simon was the boy who sacrificed him to hell.
the chaos. crystal's bitchy commentary. charles going from friendly smiling to clutching his cricket bat. niko's whispering "200k slow burn schoolboy rivals to lovers" with heart eyes. it'd be chef's kiss good. edwin fleeing to his books and praying that nobody, but especially not the cat king, finds him because there has been SO MUCH emotion already. hysterical.
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this is the stupidest crossover possible but I want Tim to make House his doctor
yes that House
why? He needs someone who is very good, will not give up or send Tim out to a different specialist just because his medical condition is difficult, will not be overly concerned about the danger Tim puts himself in, and will lie on Tim's medical records AND to Batman/Bruce Wayne/all of the Bats without hesitation or fear.
House is and will do all of those things without hesitation. He has no shame, no boundaries, he WILL get into a public fight with Bruce Wayne if it means keeping that man out of his patient's (and House's) business. He will help Tim lie to and gaslight the rest of his family without hesitation.
in exchange, Tim is his favorite patient. Not because they get along, necessarily, Tim is a know-it-all little shit and they constantly bicker and House hates how practically every facet of Tim's existence is a lie (and Tim thinks House is a smug know-it-all jackass who is needlessly cruel and callous bc he thinks the world owes him and never delivers just bc he's in pain, news flash a lot of people are in pain and manage not to be assholes) BUT, 1, Tim brings him really interesting cases and problems, and 2, Tim NEVER lies to House about his medical conditions or what he was doing when they happened.
He lies about literally almost everything else under the sun TO everyone else, but he is 100% completely upfront and honest about his medical history and what is going on with him with House.
admittedly it takes a while for House to realize Tim ISN'T lying to him because some of the shit he says is completely insane ("the vigilante thing is pretty obvious but what do you MEAN you got the Apocalypse virus TWICE, AND SURVIVED, AS A FOURTEEN-FIFTEEN YEAR OLD")
but once he realizes Tim doesn't ever lie to him, he becomes House's favorite patient because at least TIM gives him all of the data he needs as best he's able the moment he asks. At least House doesn't have to waste his time following up on bogus information or figuring out the truth, he can just get right into the meat of the medical issue at hand.
also it's so fun to lie directly to Batman's face, know the man knows, and know he can't do anything about it
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This feels like both a statement of potential obviousness, but also a prediction because hey, we're only 2.5 hrs into Episode 1: I don't think Downfall will reveal either the gods or the Aeorians to somehow be uniquely evil, or that the desire on either part to destroy the other is somehow uniquely more justified or deserved.
Like in Episode 1 here we're getting a very strong dose of the shitty things Aeorians are doing to other mortals in their pursuit of control and power - we already knew they were a warmongering surveillance state, and as things get worse on Exandria it's grimly unsurprising that the people on the ground are increasingly treated as disposable. But Aeor is still a city full of people seeking safety in a land torn open by the gods' battles, desperate to survive by any (increasingly ugly and sinister) means. And the gods in turn are afraid for their survival, and are acting accordingly in seeking Aeor's Downfall (immense collateral damage) - all while and the versions of them in the party here have lived mortal lives & hardships, have families, communities. They have lived in the desolation their own godly battles have created. We don't see them portrayed as lofty divine abstracts, not even necessarily in the intro, where they are confused, afraid, and seeking safety from danger.
For Ludinus to think this "footage" is in his favor against the gods, and the complexity of the lore being what it is and the cast being the storytellers that they are, I think it must be the kind of series of events you can look at and see the humanity (using that word deliberately) for good and ill in all parties involved - and leave again with your biases if they're strong enough. Very curious what we will learn. I expect to weep. I can't wait.
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Wade: *busts in* The girls are fighting!!
Logan: *runs in only to see Kitty and Jubilee bickering* ? There's no fighting...??
Wade: The tea is piping hot!
Logan: *200 year old confused puppy face* *Looks at Ororo*
Ororo: *fondly rolls eyes* They're having a disagreement about fashion.
Logan: ... but theres no tea..
Ororo: Gossip.
Logan: Ooohhh okay. Got it. Wade, they aren't fighting.
Wade: She just said that her earrings are tacky! They're SO fighting!
Logan: Kitty stop calling stuff tacky, Jubilee you know you cant grab her anyway.
Jubilee: If I could id shove these tacky earrings up her-
Logan: WOAH okay- yeah theyre so fighting.
Wade: Right!? Get the popcorn!
Ororo: Wade no-
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John Constantine was in prison.
No, not a normal, mortal prison. Those wouldn't be able to hold him like this one does.
No, he's imprisoned in the Infinity Realm.
The warden of the establishment is Walker, someone whose blood sings Witch Hunter.
If that wasn't bad enough, with every second, it gets worse. Angels decided to interfere in a realm not in possession of their God.
Who's idea was it to go against the Infintiy Realm? Are they nuts?
"John Constantine," One of the messangers steps forward. There is no weapon in sight, yet.
"Under the scrutiny of Heaven, we were sent to retrieve you for a trial." Their voice clipped, blond hair shimmering a soft green and John is sweating buckets.
"Your deals with various demon folk and such shall be judged unter gods court and—"
A loud bang echoes through the hall, Walker's men are surrounding the beings of heaven and particular brave soul steps forward.
The lad is young, can't be older than Bat's Robin. He walks with an air of authority, white hair floating against gravity's rules and towering before the flock of messangers.
"How dare—"
The boy, the godling– growls.
He blocks their view of Constantine, staring them down.
Some of the angels fall back, wings arched and ready for a fight, weapons still not in sight however.
"I am Phantom, King of God's of the Infinity Realm." The child with a title too much for such small shoulders bear, introduces himself.
It sends the flock into mild panic. Constantine is just a bit satisfied at the change.
"Returns to your god and tell him this, every Constantine bearing the title Laughing Magician is under my protection."
For such a small stature, his voice is booming, the command thinly veiled as a threat and icicles forming around him.
"Tell him that if he ever dares to breach my territory once more, I will not hesitate to call war upon heaven."
The main angel of the flock, the one that had read out Constantines sentence, hesitated only for a moment before urging the others to leave.
Posture stiff and movements jerky.
They didn't expect to be told off like this, John muses.
He only slightly dreads when phantoms attention drifts to him finally, a light knock on the metal bars and the whole wall was gone.
"Follow me, John Constantine."
And John does.
He'll sweet talk himself out of this on the way to his doom. Like always.
—
("Unpopular belief, but I actually quite like you." Danny had stated once in the garden, sitting on a table and drinking tea. John hadn't touched his cup nor desert at all, cannot trust those of the infinite after all.)
(A rip into the green before them had created a portal, a gateway.
"Leave, Laughing Magician. Hold onto that necklace, it will ward off anyone with the intent to harm and deals as a warning to those working for the immortal."
And as John steps forward, his eyes meet toxic green.
"We will see one another again, sooner or later. Farewell, Jester."
The portal spat him out in his apartment in New York, if it wasn't for the protection charm, Constantine would have believed it to be a mere dream. A warning.)
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