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#(Also sorry about the salt really i am)
siena-sevenwits · 7 months
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#Take with grain of salt - not exactly sad but will probably feel much dandier another time#Tonight I want so much to create - to make stories that will make others love what is good and true and beautiful#I have a condition which (among a lot of other things that are irrelevant to this post) causes me to feel very tired a lot of the time.#and I also tend to go through bouts of insomnia - in the middle of one now.#It's small potatoes compared to what a lot of my friends have to go through health-wise and I am grateful#(though i probably should be more so)#But - the point. I am just so tired all the time and I try to soldier through and be creative because that's the way my heart is shaped#But so often I just feel like the exhaustion sabotages everything and tonight I am just aching to be more creative than I've been#I'm not unhopeful about it - so many people go through this after all and end up making wonderful art. And there's something to be said for#patience and filling the creative well and trusting all to God. But tonight I feel - not sorry for myself thankfully - just very wistful.#Wanting to make something really beautiful and see it through the end and be more resilient in the face of the tiredness.#(Ha - my life is a good one if that's what's making me wistful!)#God can do whatever He wants with it and maybe the greater glory is for another time.#But I also wonder... I would not have been calling to Him unless He has been calling to me - and I hope!#OK - sentimental pout over. ;-)#neverending storytellers
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rmorde · 8 months
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What's happening with MAPPA ?
Their scheduling is simply terrible and its killing animators on the inside. Many big name animators are posting online how little of a time they are being given to work on the episode. I have seen one artist post how they only have 5 days (!) to draw a sequence. The Choso vs Yuji episode only finished post-production BARELY A DAY before it aired. It's insane.
Shibuya Arc is action-heavy and the expectations for the animation is high. Artists HAVE to deliver high quality work on the project because their reputation is on the line.
Some of the artists have been posting how hellish it is to work on MAPPA. The director of the last episode felt so bad about how "terrible" it is and apologized. Some have barely enough time to submit their sketches, in-between art, key frames, corrections, etc.
Now, for us, the episode is great. However, "sakuga" fans are more discerning and would see how its faltering in some parts. They can tell how the staff is struggling and are being forced to produce "subpar" results because of the 7 day production schedule.
*Sakuga = High quality Animation = 24 frames (drawings) per second
The staff takes great pride in their work. So, having to deliver subpar "sakuga" to audiences is horrible for their mentality and confidence. They do not want that to be their legacy - which is a big deal for them.
Think these episodes look great already? Had the animators have more time, they would have looked even better!
The fact that the staff can still make episodes look so good by sheer will and god-like drawing skills despite their schedule should be given a lot of respect and admiration.
Now, why haven't the staff been given more time?
It's because MAPPA is greedy. Not only is the studio producing JJK. They have other big projects going on alongside it: AOT, Vinland Saga, CSM. All of them had to look good. The staff have barely any time to breathe as they are treated like machines to deliver high quality animation season after season.
While CSM is being produced, the staff are already working on JJK 0 and then JJK S2 Hidden Inventory. It resulted with CSM's last few episodes being janky. JJK 0 was great and Hidden Inventory, obviously, was really polished (at the cost of Hell's Paradise being average imo tho).
Then we have Shibuya Arc. In all honesty, I wished they have delayed this a bit later. Maybe turned it into a winter season anime because again Shibuya Arc is:
Very very hyped. It HAS to look good and polished.
Lots of Action. Action is like the crowning jewel of any shonen anime and JJK has the reputation of being the best at delivering it. They CANNOT mess this up. *Cue PTSD to the insane complaints of the Toji vs Gojo Round 2 + Yuji vs Locust Curse episodes*
The solution should have been: Delay the anime so the animators can breathe and deliver their best which would make Shibuya Arc as polished, if not better, than Hidden Inventory.
Sadly, with MAPPA's insanity, it is impossible:
The staff are juggling so many high-tier projects. They have no room to "take their time" so to speak. They have to "GO! GO! GO!"
The "airtime" has already been reserved. Any delays would cost them losing a slot of airtime which meant the series MAY NOT completely be televised (which I think was the fate of ZOM100). Lost airtime means lost profit and MAPPA can't have that.
Fan anticipation. I wish I could lie about it but I just know some entitled assholes would harass the studio and the staff about animating Shibuya Arc ASAP. Fans can really put a lot of hype and pressure for JJK at the same time.
Now here are just my own opinion. But other factors may be:
4. MAPPA wants to capitalize Halloween. Just look at all the merch and collab events! All profits from those would go to the studio and not Gege. Gege's profit are JUST from the manga. Anime-related merch/products would be for the benefit of its manufacturers, studio, and shops only.
5. Timing things with the manga. Prime example: Gojo. (I am not too sure about this tho).
One reason I am excluding is the staff not working on the project because they may be busy with something else. JJK is a huge! New animators would love to have that as part of their portfolio. Big names in the industry would have wanted to work on it too because of the challenge it poses and their love for the manga series or animation in general as well.
TL;DR: It's all MAPPA's fault and not the staff. The studio wanted everything out of greediness while the animators just want to bring out their very best at their own pace.
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arthur-r · 2 months
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what’s really embarrassing is my roommate on the phone with his mom saying “yeah i’ve been getting really sloppy i haven’t cleaned in a week it’s terrible” and my side of the room is just like that. all of the time. and i feel guilty but he also hasn’t ever said anything to my face he moved my stuff some at the beginning of the year but has never talked to me about it and i’m also so fucking ill that i just cant really handle adding that to my list while trying to also not fail school. so here i am being a terrible person i guess. did i tell you guys about turtle-person. have i showed my bracelets. i’m gonna go to sleep but in the morning i need to show my bracelets
#help i have work tomorrow. i also feel sick and strange. wish me luck#the sun was around today which was incredible but also i think it gave me too much mental energy#cause for the first time in forever i had the brightness of spirit to go for a walk. but that’s not the same as having the blood flow for it#so i think i overexerted myself cause of being finally happy and mentally energized i forgot about being physically disabled#i also had to explain POTS to somebody today and she was literally like ‘oh is that the thing where you need to have salt’ and NO like#i do have a really high salt intake to cope with POTS. but that’s not the fucking thing yknow?? like no that’s not what the thing i have is#it has nothing to do with salt. salt is a fun little coincidence that it can help with water retention which in turn helps with POTS#and it raises blood pressure is i think the other reason? but anyway idk i would honestly rather she just not know about it than have like#that very particular tiktok version of it like i am so glad for internet knowledge being spread and stuff and i mean. i guess even the posts#that i’m about to complain about are good for making people feel like they’re not alone. so maybe it’s fine. but i was going to complain of#the videos that are like ‘‘that one POTS friend’’ and it’s just like. salty food. instead of like. having to sit down?? BEING FATIGUED??#and like whatever. whatEVER but i wish it wasn’t getting conflated with one particular little way of treating it. even though i use that way#i don’t have needs-a-lot-of-salt-disease. like that’s not the point. that’s not the issue. it’s not a salt deficiency. salt just helps#and it doesn’t FIX it. it just helps. that’s all#ANYWAY EVERYTHING IS FINE. i feel sick though. but i’m gonna sleep and i’ll be fine#i miss before i had a job cause then i could sleep all day if i skipped class and it would be really nice. but now i have a job i would be#missing on my responsibilities for. and I don’t actually have accommodations. but im gonna sleep i’ll be fine#and library book cart is actually so rollator. like as far as being able to walk the library situation is such a win#anyway i’m gonna go to sleep now. but yeah idk i’m sick and a mess what else is new. but i have something whatever i’m good theres something#unrequited love for life or something like that. ok im gonna go to bed sorry for being weird and strange all the time!!!!#me. my post. mine.#delete later
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so, lance and veronica like kuron- i think thats very fucking cool for multiple reasons- but does that extend to other members of their family? i think it would be funny if they just decided to adopt this weird fucked up guy into the family<3 though knowing your au, i have a feeling things arent that simple in this situation....
Honestly that is a good question, cause i didnt even factor in Lance's other family members. My instinct is, "obviously yeah Lance's family love strays, they'll see Kuron's pathetic little meow meow ass and bring out the adoption papers." However given the entire family is already a bit fucked up right now, i dont think that would happen immediately and also i have like 3 options.
1.Veronica doesnt say shit and is a lying liar who lies- pretty much everyone here is bad at communication and to be fair this is like a very weird ass situation to even process let alone explain, so when Veronica gets a call from her mom, she thinks back to when Lance was missing and everyone was having a really hard time and than the Galra came and then they were having even more bad time and Lance comes back and war ends and i think Lance and atleast his parents move to Altea¹ and while she wasnt around much things were fine? She guesses? And then Lance runs away and they were all having a bad time again and Christ alive Lance their parents are in their 60's their hearts cant take this anymore.
Anyway Vero remembers all this and she hears her mom asking if she found anything on Lance and she goes, "yyyuuupp in fact i actually found Lance! He's umm.....he's sleeping right now! Yup! He's definately fine! That is right! He just needs a little space and was uhhhh.....helping out a friend, he will definately call you if- When he wakes up!!! I will tell him to call you back, we are going to have a long chat anyway! Dont worry mom! He's ok :)!!!"
She'll definately tell them!! Eventually! The time is just isnt right yet!! The fact she is ready to full on "Weekend at Bernie's" this shit doesnt mean anything!! She'll figure it all out and then Lance will wake up and she'll fucking kick his ass for doing this and everything will go back to being normal!!! This will not come back to bite her in the ass and her family is Not getting Suspicious at all!!!
In this scenario Lance's family never meet or even know about Kuron. In case they do eventually find out he'll kind of go overlooked cause 1) they just found out Lance is in a coma. 2) they just found out Lance has been in a coma for a long time. 3) they just found out that Veronica knew and she lied to them! 4) they just found out that Lance is uhhhh not doing Great. Supernaturally. Kind of makes it hard to pay attention to other major elephants in the room. (This could be where Kuron can stand up for Veronica and be like "look none of you are ok! Veronica isnt ok! Lance certainly wasnt ok! And things are not ok and they have changed irreversibly and all of you are hurt! And you know what that is ok! But we all have to acknowledge that hurt!" And something else super cheezy along the lines.)
2. Veronica tells her family only like half truth- in this Vero still trying to process the situation kinda just tells her family that Lance is in a coma but not about Kuron or magical shit. So to the family Kuron is Lance and Vero's weird friend who is really all over the place but ultimately a good friend who is just trying to help and be supportive and is kind young man with good head on his shoulders 😊 (they do think he should stop with his self destructive habits like they arent going to judge but smoking isnt good for you :/). The option where Kuron is adopted the fastest. Meanwhile Kuron is kind of being crushed by guilt. Like logically he understands that Lance's condition isnt his (Kuron's) fault, but at the end Lance did drop into coma to bring him back so he does feel a bit responsible. So it's just Kuron screaming internally.
Obviously the family isnt doing great at all. But i also feel like few of them (maybe few of the siblings) saw something like this coming. It's either because Lance was very clearly not ok before he ran away and also they have gotten just so used to this bullshit that they are just numbed to it. It doesnt make it any better but man just tough times for area family.
3. Veronica tells everything- Basically Vero and Kuron tells her family everything they know. Naturally family has mixed reaction towards it. Atleast few members arent surprised that Lance went and did this for a friend. One of them is really heartbroken and angry and most definately lashed out on Kuron and i think Kuron lashes back. There are those who are a bit uncomfortable but more because they really do not get the situation cause like what do you even do? Atleast one of them is also angry at Lance for repeatedly running off and pulling this stunt and doesnt he know what everyone is going through because of him? Just all around fucking mess everyone. It's tearing the family apart.
¹ Yeah i think Lance and his mom did move to Altea. I did actually watch the last ep just skipped to it and in the ending credits he seemed to be in Altea cause of fucking course he is. It's not like he spent the whole fucking show missing Earth or the fact that him being a normal human of Earth was a fundamental part of his narrative, nooooooo he is A-ok with moving to Altea and not even to help in rebuilding the universe but to be a fucking farmer and "tell Allura's stories" or some shit, cause yup that's all his character is! And i am Definately Fine with This! Yup! Definately! Now if you'll excuse me i am going to walk into the ocean
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cottageivy · 1 year
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trying to decide if i should go ahead and read the sun and the star now despite not having read the last two trials of apollo books or to just go ahead
#mia rambles#the only stuff ive seen about it is from 2 pjo blogs i follow and listen. love them great posts but also#they do tend to always skew negatively and i love them for it but i also am taking with a grain of salt#bc some of the shit that bothers them i dont really care about lol#again love their blogs thats why i follow but#anyways from what ive seen and i ahvent seen any actual spoilers#but i have seen the fact tah apparently rick disregards the plot of the toa books#which idk if im mad at bc i havent finished them lmao#also something doesnt follow a canon detail but its rick riordan that man does that so many times#also tumblr people despise solangelo and that is their right#im more neutral on them but like i like the potential of them#they just werent developed enough and thats what they use as an excuse but in like a mean way skadaj#anyways all this to say. idk if reading the last two toa books are important#i did read the Big One (burning maze ifykyk) so i wouldnt be spoiled there#i know piper gets a nameless girlfriend in the end that we dont even properly meet at the end of the series#which so true sapphic piper is so real but also thats not proper rep babe#the two lesbians that house leo (and calypso? i cant remember) are better rep#give piper her own book pls#...maybe write it with an indigenous person tho bc uh. we dont want a hoo repeat#IM RAMBLING ABOUT PERCY JACKSON ON MY SIMS BLOG IM SORRY#I JUST HAVE THOUGHTS#i placed a hold on the order on the book at my library and im 23rd in lines#so maybe ill get the last two toa books and read them in the meantime idk
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deus-ex-mona · 1 year
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there’s a non-non-zero chance of success though… _(:3 」∠)_
#long depressing rant in the tags incoming ig? take warning!!#maybe it’s bc it’s 3am and i’m tired or maybe it’s bc of the 8-9 hour old fried vermicelli that i just gave up on eating but my head hurts~~#or maybe it could even be bc i spent like 3 hours unpacking my boxes (note: my fam moved last month) instead of chilling like i wanted to…#either way i saw some things while unpacking that i really should’ve left in the distant past and i’m feeling as empty as my stomach pre-米粉#though i did uncover a dogtag i had engraved years ago with nothing but a ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) on it so that was pretty funny#but other than that… i remembered all the weird things i had given up on in the past via the things i unearthed…#like cooking! i unpacked this huge 1k+ page thick cookbook thing and remembered that i had a phase where i liked to cook#then i remembered that i had mistaken salt for sugar while making some meat dish with a ton of soy sauce and byebye cooking confidence :(#and to add to that i also read a past essay of mine about my culture and i remembered my grandma and i. yeah.#and i also saw stuff from my old hobbies that i had to give up on due to money/time constraints and i just. yeah.#and not to forget all the stuff from my former friends… i swear i always get ghosted the moment we affirm that we’re friends lol#am i a walking maxed social link or something? lol? yeah i have no irl friends. none.#i’ve gotten used to it though~ i don’t mind having no friends. it leaves me with more time for myself and my sleep~#it’s just that… sometimes i get the urge to hop over the country border for some ~chewing gum~ shopping… but there’s no one to go with lol#or like when i see interesting-looking events going on at local attractions but there’s no one to check it out with… or something.#and that got me wondering… am i just wasting my life or something? it’s a new year right? so i should make some lifestyle changes too right?#…​and so i bought a hairdryer for the first time a few days back. yeah. that’s enough change for 1 year. lol#who needs friends when you can have a nice warm hairdryer? blast away good pal!!!!!!!!!!!!#anyways yeah. that’s my 3am rant of the day. sorry if you read this lol#sunday’s 🧂saltfest🧂#h e lp i forgot to disable rbs on this for a bit i hate 3am brain smmmm </3
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lowkeyremi · 6 months
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jjk men and aftercare ft. Gojo, Choso, Nanami, Toji, and Geto.
a/n: I saw something like this awhile ago and forgot to write abt it but here I am now babyyyy (there is already a part 2 in progress bc i wanna do 10 characters lmaoo) also not proofread bc im tired :P
cw: really suggestive, established relationships, how they are after sex basically :)
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Gojo Satoru
When you two first started hitting third base Gojo was all about himself and about how he felt. When you had cleaned yourself up and prepared for bed that night Satoru finally realized something was wrong.
"What's wrong, babe? I thought you liked it??" He asks, worried about his performance in bed. Your silence prompts him to try and figure out what he had done wrong, and honestly he couldn't even think of anything.
"Pleaseeee tell me. I won't know if you don't say anything." Those invasive thoughts that tell you, "you don't matter to him." start to attack your brain once again. He's way out of your league you start to think.
"Aftercare. You didn't even offer to help me clean up, Satoru." Saying it out loud makes you sound kind of petty in your opinion but it does matter.
"OH. Shit baby I'm so so so so sorry!!!!! I- It's just-" He cuts himself off and tries to reword his sentence, "Well, back then I.. I was sleeping around so my pleasure was the only thing that mattered to me. It's different.. you know? Dating. I'm still working out everything. I won't forget next time I promise."
He'd been telling the truth because from then on he always went all out with aftercare. He would run you a bath with your favorite salts and oils, he'd make you your favorite snacks, he'd even cuddle you afterwards until you fell asleep. (rich boyfriend privileges)
Choso Kamo
He'd been waiting so long to finally sleep with you for the first time so he had done all his research prior to the day. He was looking at your dilated pupils, messy hair, and the cum that sat on your stomach.
"Okay so, according to the article I read, I should run you a hot bath, yeah?" He asks nervously.
A small smile braces your lips. In all honesty you probably should have expected this much from Choso. He wants to make sure everything is perfect.
"You looked up aftercare???" You sit up on the bed and a back cramp decides to hit right then and there. As soon as he hears your groan he sprints the the kitchen, only to return with a heat pad.
"Heat pad for cramps?" He's truly nervous, and eager to please you, the love of his life.
"Thank you, Cho. I'll take you up on that bath."
"Of course, I'll get in with you if that's okay." The smile on your face is enough of an answer.
Nanami Kento
YOU ARE WINNING!!!!
Massages, baths, homemade snacks, you name and he'll do it for you. In his mind it's the least he can do for you, because you treat him so well and give him that pretty pussy he loves so much.
"Right here?" He's currently working those skilled fingers into your tight muscles after bending you every which way.
"Ohhh... yes right there, baby. Hurts so muchhhh." You whine and moan at the same time. At this point you two have already bathed and he's made sure to moisturize your body leaving you clean and refreshed.
He seemed to notice the way you limped and asked if you need anything. The sex was good really, but you didn't want to tell him that folding you in half wasn't the best idea. Oh, but he's persistent would not leave you alone until you told him what was wrong.
Once you told him he had immediately sat you down, picked up your favorite lotion and started to work out the kinks in your body.
"I'm so sorry, again." He mumbles quietly.
"Stop apologizing, Kento. These things happen. At least I know to stretch before hand next time." His face softens at your giggles and he presses a small kiss to your thigh.
"Oh do not get me started." A smile creeps up his face, while blush slowly spreads across yours.
Toji Fushiguro
BOOOOOO no aftercare. well maybe not much at least.
Has not properly cared for a woman since his late wife but he realizes if he wants you to stay he'll have to fix that.
At first he would throw a wet rag at you and give a simple, "here clean up." When he got out the shower he was genuinely confused why you were no longer at his apartment.
As soon as you picked up he could tell you were pissed, "What do you want, Fushiguro."
He's a little shocked, did not expect that from you, "I'm your boyfriend so it's Toji and not Fushiguro. The hell is your problem??"
The silence is so loud. For a second he thought you'd hung up on him. "Hello??"
"I'm giving you some time to think about that dumbass question and figure out why I'm mad at you." He clicks his tongue and rolls his eyes too. He's lucky you can't see it.
"Ugh, I don't have time to play the damn guessing game. You're always mad about the little things.. what is it?" He's running through anything he could have possibly done wrong recently.
"Toji, you threw a fucking wet washcloth at me and told me to clean myself up. I'm your girlfriend, not one of your one night stands!" There it is, and the bad part is he doesn't even see what's wrong with that. (at first)
"I don't even give them something to clean up with, I just leave. But damn if you want me to get all fancy and shit I'll try." He scratches his head and begins to wonder why women are so hard to please.
Let me tell you he's no Nanami, but it's getting better. Still falls asleep afterward most times tho :/
Geto Suguru
You do it yourself for the most part, and here's why.
He's over here washing you up in the tub and he can't stop staring at your soapy titties and it just leads to more sex.
It's never just aftercare with him. He's always chasing more. Like that time you asked him to massage your legs after you two had finished fucking in the tub.
"Yeah shit why not? Lotion or oil??" He asks looking through your products.
"Uhhh lotion's fine." You'd grabbed your phone to see if your mother left you a voicemail which she did. She talked about how you need to pick up the phone or at least text her your alive if you're not gonna pick up. You were NOT going to pick up earlier though. Suguru likes to tease and you learned that the hard way when he was eating you out while you were discussing group bonding dinner ideas with your boss over the phone.
Anyway, he made his way to the bed with your lotion and all things went to hell. It was slow at first, nothing too sensual, then of course he had to slip a finger in your pussy and you sat there and stared.
"We are not doing this, we just got out of the bath." You were so serious, but so was he. (you were also aroused so)
"Another bath never hurt anybody, 'fraid of a little water baby??"
(such an annoying whore)
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toxicanonymity · 8 months
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leopard print.  
4.5k, joel x f!reader; special guest in tags
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SUMMARY: Depraved one shot based on this. Joel mistakes you for a sex worker, offers you a ride, Fs you, shares you and is mildly possessive about it.
WARNINGS: I8+ strangers, drugs, talk of sex work, unsafe public P in V, dubcon (drugs/alc, not noticeably intoxicated), cockwarming, degradation, pantygagging, creampies, car stuff, orgasm delay m, vaginal plugging, voyeurism, sharing. Unedited. 
A/N: Night walks vibes, but different too. You'll see. New fantasy for myself 😫
"And if I was workin'?" You ask.  He gives a low whistle. "Wouldn't know where to start," he murmurs. "But I can tell ya how it'd end." He looks at your skirt. . . "She'd be wrecked n' beggin' for more, baby." Your fingers absentmindedly graze your chest. . . He sticks the joint in his mouth and shamelessly adjusts himself with both hands, tucking it into his waistband.
You pull into the gas station on the back of your friend's motorcycle. "When I fuel up, I'm outta here," he warns you.  Oh well. If you have to walk back to your friend's condo, it's only two blocks.  He's grumpy – You and your girlfriends have been a hot mess at the pool all day playing floating beer pong and licking alcoholic whipped cream off each other.  He didn't wanna take you with him in the first place. No helmet, no reasonable shoes, not even a shirt.
You swing your leg off the motorcycle and as you step down onto the ground with your red wedges, you adjust your cheap, stretchy leopard print miniskirt. It matches, or clashes, with your leopard print bikini. You leave your sunglasses on as you enter the gas station with a chime. You fish a damp $20 out of your bikini top and survey the snacks. 
You feel someone lurking nearby, but ignore it until you hear a deep, smooth voice.  "Nice rosettes."
"s’cuse me?" 
You turn only slightly toward the man. Maybe homeless.  Good looking like a washed up rockstar. He gestures toward your bikini top. "That's a nice set'a rosettes." You look down at your tits spilling out of your push-up bikini top, then you look back at his face. Handsome man, really. Salt and pepper beard. Full head of dark hair with a little gray. Sunkissed skin. His eyes are kind and glassy. His nose twitches. "Oh, that's what leopards call their spots. Rosettes."  
You laugh uncomfortably. 
“Yeah, the ones on your top, those are pretty good.” His eyes drift down your body. “Skirt doesn’t really have’em right. Still nice though.” 
"Thanks." You politely nod and return to looking at the snacks, ignoring him in the corner of your eye. 
He doesn’t leave. He only gets closer.  He looks you up and down and steps into your personal space. He lowers his voice.  "You, uh, workin'?"
No, you don't work there. Do you look like you work at the gas station? Your stomach turns as you realize what he means, and your face goes cold. You stare at him, and your eyes drift to a hole in his shirt right below the collar. "Am I WHAT?" You ask incredulously, but trying to be quiet. Your whole body feels hot at the implication. You're humiliated, but for some reason it makes you warm between the thighs, too. 
His eyes go wide, and he puts his hands up in surrender. "Sorry," he mumbles, then adds, "A man can dream,” as he backs away. 
Your heart races and flutters and you scold yourself for being flattered.  You end up in line behind the guy. And the line takes forever, giving you plenty of time to fume and also wonder about him. It's nothing against sex work – Work is work. But you'd like to think you wouldn't be picking up a rough looking guy in a gas station.  Your friend's motorcycle revs outside. You look out the window and he's there by the curb waiting for you. You could drop the snacks on the closest rack and get the heck out.  But for some reason, you stay in line, and not because you’re that hungry. 
Someone needs to scoot behind you and you're forced to step into the sleazy man's personal space. He smells far better than you would have imagined. Woodsy and fresh. Somehow that makes all the difference, like he's not a filthy vagrant after all. He just had the aesthetic. Which is kinda hot.  Your friend on the motorcycle shakes his head, revs his engine again, then drives away.
"Asshole," you mutter.  
The man in front of you (your aspiring john) glances back and again mutters, "sorry." He scratches the back of his neck and exposes a chain under his ratty t-shirt. He really does have a nice head of hair, and now you see there’s a joint behind his ear, too.  Maybe he’s just a hippy. 
"Not you," you mumble. Well, not only him. Both of them. 
He turns to face you. "I know. Saw ya roll in." Great, so he thought that was your pimp. "Want a ride?" 
"Nah, I’m close," you mutter without looking right at him, then mumble, “thanks.” 
He wets his lips and stares at your chest for a moment before adding, "ya sure?" And now that you know this man smells good, wears a chain, and has a ride, you're throbbing. You cross your arms and bite your lip looking at his handsome nose while his kind eyes search yours in anticipation. 
"Okay," you whisper.
"Hell yeah," he whispers back with half a smile, getting a little closer, like the two of you are plotting something. 
"But I'm not workin'," you remind him.
"Heard ya the first time, gorgeous." He winks at you.
He tries to buy your food for you. When you don't let him, he nods with a smirk. He crosses his big arms, plastic bag that reads “thank you” hanging from one of them, and waits for you. Then he holds the door open on your way out. 
He checks you out as you pass through the door frame. You take your sunglasses off and put them in the bag with your snacks. 
"Name's Joel."  When you don't tell him yours, there’s a new smirk in his voice when he says, "don't gotta tell me your real name, if ya got a street name or somethin'. . ." 
"Jerk." You punch his arm and mostly suppress a laugh. 
He smiles and brings a massive hand to his bicep to pretend like it hurts, and for the first time it hits you how muscular he is.
"Truck's around back." He nods toward the back of the store. He walks slightly behind you. You feel his eyes boring a hole in your ass. Then you feel the warmth of his massive palm on the small of your back and he gets closer to you as he curves his hand around your side. "Too damn hot, baby. Had me thinkin' with my dick is all." Your face heats up and you glance at him. “I’ll carry that for ya.” He takes your bag. 
He's parked around a corner out of view. Between some bushes and a closed library for some reason. His truck is nice, and it's big. Tinted windows. The back window of the cab says Miller Brothers.  It's sunset, so you're grateful for the ride, lest any other low lifes make the same mistake on your walk back. When y'all get to his truck, he lets his hand slide down your hip. He opens the driver’s seat and puts the bags inside. Then he leans against his truck and adjusts himself. He's wearing pinstripe lounge pants.  "Can't really blame me, can ya?" He raises his eyebrows. He scans you top to bottom again.  "God damn, baby." 
You laugh and look down shyly, unsure whether to thank him. His eyes don't leave your body at all.  "To be fair, I thought you were homeless," you admit. 
He exhales a laugh and shrugs.  "Where ya headed?"
"Back to my friend’s pool."
"Hungry?"
"Nah."
"Smoke?" So that’s why you’re still outside the truck. You shouldn't, but you hesitate curiously.
You lean against the bed of his truck with your elbow resting on its edge, facing him.
"Fuck you're sexy," he mutters to himself. "Helluva rack but I'm an ass man, c'mere."
He turns toward you so he's leaning with his left side on the driver's side of the truck. He puts his right hand on your hip, rotating you so you're facing the truck. "Mmmmm." He puts his hand on the small of your back again, then slides it down–slowly, experimentally, cautiously enough for you to stop him. You don't. You're throbbing.  He grabs your ass–his palm is huge. You glance at him and watch his eyes study the curve of your body. Deep down in your body, you know you're gonna fuck him. You both know it. With his left hand he retrieves the joint from behind his ear and puts it in his mouth unlit. 
He sucks in a breath around the joint and lifts the flesh of your closest ass cheek. When he lets it drop, a growl escapes his chest. 
He fishes a lighter out of his soft pants pocket and lights up. and as he inhales, once again he can't keep his eyes off your body.  He takes the joint out of his mouth and turns your face toward his. You rotate toward him and he gets close, your bodies almost touching. He looks to your eyes for permission and begins to slowly exhale downward, so it's yours if you want it. You bring your mouth closer to his and he angles the smoke more toward your mouth as you suck it up. The moment seems to last forever and your lower belly is on fire. 
The sunset washes everything in a pink hue. When his lungs are empty, he murmurs "good girl" and rests his hand on your hip, lightly running his palm over your stretchy little miniskirt, feeling the bump toward the top hem where your bikini tie is. He peels the top of your stretchy skirt down to expose the knot and pulls at the string. You let him untie it. The parking lot is empty and wet from an earlier rain. 
"Fuck you're hot," he mutters with the strings of your bikini hanging over the miniskirt on that side. He takes another puff and passes you the joint. You take only a small inhale. "C'mere," he murmurs and his hand on your waist nudges your side off the truck and pulls you closer to him. He unties that side of your bottoms the same way. 
"And if I was workin'?" You ask. 
He gives a low whistle. "Wouldn't know where to start," he murmurs. "But I can tell ya how it'd end." He looks at your skirt.
You ask, "How's that?"
He doesn't take his eyes off your skirt. "She'd be wrecked n' beggin' for more, baby." Your fingers absentmindedly graze your chest, feeling where your tits spill over the cups. "Careful sugar," he chuckles. "Start me up, I won't ever stop." He sticks the joint in his mouth and shamelessly adjusts himself with both hands so his cock is upright and held in his waistband. He offers the joint again and you decline. He pinches it out and puts it back behind his ear.  "Damn," he mutters, still checking you out. He rubs his hand over his cock through his soft pants. "But ya *ain’t* workin'. . . so ya got nothin' to worry 'bout," he adds with a twinkle in his eye. "''Less ya want it . . ." God, you do. You want it. 
"Wrecked, huh?" You challenge him. 
He sighs and his big hand on your hot skin rotates you back toward the truck.  You hang your elbows over the side of the truck bed. He slinks behind you, then lets the heft of his cock against your ass crack. You gasp at how nice and hard it is. It moves against you and he sucks in a breath through his teeth then lets out a, "Mmm" as he exhales. He rolls his hips against you and uses both hands on your hips to pull your ass back into him so you're off the truck.
He holds you with one arm around your waist and his other hand slides between your legs from the front, up your skirt. "Bad girl, ain't ya?" His hand skims up your inner thigh to the crotch of your swimsuit, hanging loosely now that it's untied on both sides. "Yeah, ya are,” he answers for you. He slides two thick fingers through your folds and you sigh, tilting your head back.  "Spread your legs for a stranger?." His voice is deep and gruff and makes you throb.  “S’okay, not just any stranger.” His other hand grabs a tit while he runs his fingers through your dripping folds, then begins to circle your clit with his drenched digits. "Oh she's beggin' for it, baby," he murmurs. 
He lets your weight against the truck again so his forearm is between you and the metal with his hand still between your legs. His cock presses against your ass at a slow rhythm, making your insides swell with need for him as he fingers your clit. You squirm and your hips rock into his hand. You whimper and he brings his mouth to your ear. "Five hundred," he whispers. 
You gasp and he adds, "Not you. . .I'm workin' now, baby" as he speeds up on your clit. "I'm a penthouse boy, but that's your back alley discount." 
"Fuck you," you laugh.
"First one's free if i cum inside," he murmurs into your neck. Then he grabs the crotch of your swimsuit and yanks it down, pulling it off entirely. He pins you to the truck with his cock against your ass. He shoves the swimsuit in your mouth and ties the strings behind your head. You taste the chlorine and your own arousal. You turn your head to look behind you and he reassures you no one can see. 
His hand returns between your legs and he slips one, then two thick, wet fingers into you. Your cunt squelches obscenely around his digits. "Hell yeah, hear her beggin' for me?". He frees his cock from his pants and keeps fingering you.  Then he slides his fingers out and your walls twitch at the loss. He wedges his cock under your skirt and it’s so big you have to spread your legs more. He runs the head through your folds and you’re gushing. As the head massages your clit, you moan into the swimsuit in your mouth. "Want the first one free, don't ya?" He taunts into your neck, dragging his lips along the delicate skin. "Want me to fill up this filthy hole?" You nod, desperate to feel him inside you. "First with this cock, then all the cum ya can hold," he murmurs and you nod. You tilt your hips and spread your legs. "Good," he breathes. "Good girl." He notches himself with the curve of his tip just inside. "Ready to swallow me whole, hot damn." 
You push back on him and he says, "shit," and pushes into you.  He slides right into you, spreading your cunt wide open with a groan into your neck. It's a delicious stretch and he fills you to the brim, bottoming out on the first go.  "God damn, sugar." He retreats and slides his thick cock into you again, sheathing it entirely with your dripping cunt. You weren't even sure you could take this cock but it's perfect. "Fuck, you feel good," he pants and twitches inside you. If he comes early you're going to laugh but you pray he won't. He begins to roll his hips at a steady rhythm, and you moan into the swimsuit. He breathes heavily against your neck and bites and sucks you. You adjust your hips and push back on him to his rhythm. 
"Take it like a pro," he pants, "an' you're tight, too. Damn." His right hand works your clit.  His left hand comes to your throat, thumb on the left side of it, fingers on the right.  Choke me, you think. Do it. But he doesn't. He licks and kisses at the left side of your throat, by his thumb. Then his fingers on the right of your neck tense for leverage and he plants his teeth on the left side of your neck. He sucks hard and moans into you as he sucks more, like he's thirsty for blood. Your neck aches under the grip of his mouth. He breathes through his nose, and when he finally breaks with a gasp, he fucks you harder, grunting and sighing. 
You moan and he pulls your top down under your tits. A breeze and the rustling of branches nearby reminds you of the danger and you shiver. Your nipples harden under his forearm and palm and your cunt spasms. He groans behind your ear and you whimper and arch your back. 
"Gonna come on this cock?" 
You can only whimper again in response. 
"Go 'head, baby," he breathes and reaches for your clit again, groping a breast with his other hand.
You bite down on the swimsuit and your body jerks into his as you come undone. "Oh yeah," he sighs. "Fuck yeah, ohhh baby." He thrusts into you harder and you moan as your cunt chokes his cock, and with another powerful thrust he bottoms out and begins to erupt with a long sigh, pulsing warmly inside you. Then he reaches for your face and pulls down the swimsuit gag. As you gasp for air, he turns your head toward him. He kisses you deeply with his cock still rutting deep and slow inside you, pulsing the last of his seed into your depths. He moans into your mouth. And when your lips disconnect, he looks at you softly. Your eyes lock for a few seconds, more intimately than you’d expect. Then you feel awkward, and look at the back of his truck–Miller Brothers.  You say the first thing that comes to mind. "Joel Miller, huh?" You cringe at yourself. 
He raises his eyebrows. "What, like the sound'a Miller?" 
Your face goes hot and you make a joke to change the subject. "Your brother’a penthouse boy too?" 
Joel's cock slides out of you and you feel empty. He starts to fix your swimsuit top and says, "Somethin' like that. . .I'll introduce ya," as he finishes straightening it. What are you, dating now?
You start to protest, "Oh, I dunno," then pivot to something more agreeable but noncommittal. “Sure, maybe sometime.” 
—---
Joel walks you to the passenger side. What a gentleman.  He opens the door for you.  The seat isn't empty. There's a handsome man with longer, curly hair, a sexy smile, and his hands in his lap.  
"Name’s Tommy," Joel says behind you. "My lil bro." 
When Tommy lifts a hand to give you a little salute, you see his cock is out of his pj pants.   "Howdy, sweetheart." He's not even shy about it. He raises his eyebrows and holds it at attention for you,  thick and hard.  Butterflies swarm in your stomach and you can't take your eyes off it. "Kept the seat warm for ya," Tommy beams.
"Go on, sugar," Joel nods to Tommy's lap. "’fore my cum leaks out everywhere."
Your heart races and your clit throbs. It feels like you're in a dream. This is so lewd and vile. But you just got pounded in a parking lot, and who's gonna know, and who cares. You wanna sit on that cock. 
You look at Joel and he shrugs. "Don't gotta, but it's there." He leans in and gives you a kis, then murmurs "An’ she won't be leakin’ all over." He chuckles, then kisses you again. Damn, he’s a good kisser. When his head pulls back, you give him a devious, inquisitive look. and he says, "that's my girl." He helps you up and you scrunch up your skirt more. "She's hot as fuck, man," he tells his brother. 
You're facing the windshield, and it's like Tommy’s just part of the seat. It's a large truck so there's enough clearance over your head.  Tommy's large hands come to your thighs. 
"I got her," Joel says and Tommy moves his right hand to hold his cock for you. You tilt your hips and Tommy notches himself at your hole, which is still pulsing with an occasional aftershock. Before too much of Joel's cum can trickle down Tommy's cock, they both pull you down on him and you're stuffed full once again. 
"Good girl," Tommy whispers. Joel looks at you lustily and reaches his hand between your legs. He gives your clit a little rub, and you spasm on Tommy’s cock with an aftershock from Joel. 
"Goddamn," Tommy mutters. 
"Yeah," Joel whispers, then gives you another kiss.  He shoots Tommy a serious look.  "Don't fuckin' come inside her."
"I know, I know." Tommy hugs you back into his broad chest. "I’ain’t nothin' but a seat, honey. A seat and a plug." The crudeness makes you twitch.
Joel shuts the passenger door and goes back around to the driver's side. Tommy murmurs softly behind your ear. "Ya feel nice, though."
Joel buckles his seatbelt and starts the engine.  Tommy rests his hands casually on your hips and his thick cock twitches inside you. He clears his throat.
"Tellin' ya, man," Joel warns. 
"Nothin' to worry 'bout, brother,"  Tommy reassures him, playing it cool. "You used her up good." 
Joel backs up the truck and asks, "Where to?" 
You tell him the building. It's already in view in the distance as you approach the street to pull out from the parking lot. "There," you point to it. Joel opens his Takis and puts a few in his mouth. Your walls are hugging Tommy's cock as Joel eats his snack and drives. You bounce on Tommy's thick cock as Joel pulls onto the main street, immediately getting stuck at a red light.  You moan, and Tommy stifles a grunt then whispers "shhhh,"  into your hair.  It's not a long way. But you're stuck in traffic.  
"What do you listen to?" Joel asks and turns on the radio. It's on the local classic rock station.
"That works," you mumble, laid back against Tommy's barrel chest with your eyes half closed. While Joel is focused on the road, Tommy wedges his hand under one of the push-up cups of your bikini. 
Tommy sighs, then whispers into your right ear where Joel can’t see. "Sexy little thing ain't ya." His cock twitches. You close your eyes and take a deep breath, trying not to moan. He lightly pinches your nipple then fixes your suit again. God his cock feels good. You're almost to your friends condo, but you don't want it to be over. 
"Can you, uh–can you take me to my place instead?" You ask
Joel looks at you and cocks an eyebrow. "Not back to the pool?" You shake your head sleepily. "Tuckered out, huh?” he chuckles.  “That's okay baby. Where ya live?" 
You tell him the apartment complex. It's a couple miles further. "Good girl," Tommy whispers, pleased to have you on his cock a little longer. As Joel drives, you feel Tommy subtly lifting his hips. The bumps in the road have you bouncing on him too. And with the slow traffic, wearing nothing but a bikini top and a miniskirt,  you catch a few stares, even through the dark tinted windows. It turns you on more. It turns Joel on, too. He's hard again and rubbing himself over his pj's which are wrecked with drying drops of his cum, your juices, and a darker new spot of precum.  Tommy’s cock is so thick, and it throbs, and occasionally twitches, and you can so freshly conjure the feeling of Joel pounding you too, whispering filth into your ear.  
Your body’s building toward another climax, but you’re trying not to let it. Your cunt spasms, and Tommy's chest expands under your back with a deep inhale. "Shhh, it's okay," he murmurs. You’re almost there. 
"Joel, i–" you reach over for him. He looks at your face and does a double take. "Shit," he peels into the closest corner. "It's okay, hold on for me sugar."
Tommy moans, trying so hard not to cum.  "You better fuckin not,” Joel growls at Tommy.  Joel takes off his seat belt as he parks and urgently takes his cock out. "C'mere baby," Joel reaches for you. Tommy groans and you feel a little pulse as he hoists you off his cock. Your cunt twitches, trying to hang onto Tommy, not wanting to let him go.  Tommy erupts as his cock slides out of you and his cum paints your folds.  He moans through it, cock in his hand, cum gurgling onto his fist, head tilted back, eyes closed. 
Meanwhile Joel pulls you toward him and your cunt is beginning to flutter ever so slightly around nothing, but you’re staving off a full climax.  You kneel on the empty seat between them and Joel urgently pulls you into straddling him. His cheeks are flushed and his face is serious. "yeah, I got ya baby." He wets his lips, then his mouth hangs open as his tip finds your hole and he pulls you down on his dick, even thicker than you remember. "Hell yeah," he whispers and you're packed full of cock again. "Uungghh yeah," Joel lifts his hips into you and you cum on his cock right away. 
"Oh fuck," you gasp, "Joel–ugghgh," you moan unrestrained and tilt your head back. He catches it in his hand and brings your face to his. You clench around his cock and he fucks up into you slowly. Your lips break with moans from each of you as you cum on his cock and he moves you. He hugs you into him and latches onto the unmarked side of your neck. Then your clit is grinding into him as he keeps moving you on him while your climax wanes. 
"So damn hot, baby. Really take it like a pro." His words make you spasm again, and Joel groans. He rocks you on his cock, biting his lip. You can tell from how quiet he is, he’s trying not to cum so fast. But he can’t help it and after a minute, he asks,  "Ready for another load?" You nod, desperate to feel him pulse inside you.  "Think ya can handle it?"
You nod and roll your hips into him. You could come again, too. 
"Hell yeah, that's my bad girl–oh, fuck, fuck–ohhh.” He grunts from the back of his throat as his cock pulses enormously inside you, adding to his first load. As his moan wanes, his lips latch onto yours again. Your lips move together, and you begin to clench around his cock again, whimpering into his mouth with the pleasure. It seems to last forever. When your lips break, he reads your eye and mutters, "fuck, you're hot.”
He breathes heavily while his pulses continue but echo smaller and smaller, as with your aftershocks on him. He sits back against the seat for a moment catching his breath. "You're somethin' else," he whispers, then looks around outside. "What unit are you?" 
You tell him your apartment number and point out the building. You stay impaled on his cock as he drives to that building. He nuzzles his nose and mouth into your neck. He parks the car, then spends another moment with you.  He nibbles your neck, presses sweet kisses into your jaw, fixes your hair, then whispers, "Nice to meet ya, sugar." 
Tommy gets out of the truck and walks around to the driver’s side, and opens Joel’s door. Joel kisses you goodbye, deeply, with tongue, and helps hoist you off his cock. Tommy helps you down out of the truck while Joel tucks his cock away.  Tommy gives you a hug and kisses you on the cheek.  Then they drive away and leave you wrecked and wanting more. 
---------
thank you so much for reading and engaging! I really love and appreciate y'all.
For more Joel and Tommy, check out stuffing.
if you liked this joel... you'd like the night walks AU, If you like the sharing with a hint of dominance/possessiveness, I think walkintotheriveranddisappear has a gang bang where only Joel can cum inside. I have Tommy's hard day (established free use relationship with Joel)
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EDIT - alright I've gotten several messages this week saying notifs aren't working. I think they might be delayed for some people but idk what to do. I guess I'm temporarily bringing this back but idk if it's even the most recent list 🤡 please subscribe to notifs on toxicfics if you haven't already. If you haven't been getting notifs, you can see the most recent fics you missed on toxicfics.
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@within-the-depths @am-3-thyst @may-machin @pedromania91 @sloanexx @paleidiot @yourmistysecret @bean-is-reading @daddy-dins-girl
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roxineedstosleep · 4 months
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Could you do a snippet for yandere platonic Batfam where reader accidentally gets hurt and is able to hide it for a few days until someone (May be Dick?) finds it and asks / gets upset about it? Love your writing!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️
Hi there!!!
First of all: Thank you sweetie!
It's been a while since I've written, mostly because of the university, I'm about to graduate and I'm crazy because I'm approaching my final exams (I even have to defend my research work to be able to get my bachelor's degree)!
But, I got to thinking a bit about what you have written above… and even more so because I myself am a little bit crashed after my last film shoot for my final year of my degree. And can I just say that being in a bad way and having to hide it is terrible.
So… here goes!
(I'm sorry if I sound a bit comical in this writing, but I think the best way to get over something is to laugh at yourself a bit so you don't think about the pain too much; I hope you enjoy it anyway.)
Disclaimer: I don't know if you've noticed, but English is not my native/mother tongue. Occasionally, when I think too much, I write them in my language and then translate it in a trusted translator. So, if there's a grammatical problem or a strange term, it's the translator's fault.
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Let's face it… having a large family is terribly exhausting.
It's never quiet enough, everyone is in everyone else's business, you can't leave your favorite mermelade in the fridge for less than a day. Someone is always occupying the bathroom or using your favorite shampoo or watching something on TV at too much volume and someone is probably occupying your bed at nap time.
Did I mention about meddling too much in other people's business? Yes? Well… triple it.
Having multiple siblings was new.
Having multiple siblings, a father and a butler/grandfather isn't exactly bread and butter either.
It wouldn't be so bad to belong to a large and numerous one if it was your blood family and you had lived with them all your life. I mean, sometimes blood is too thick and you have no choice but to learn to love them or just be nice to each other.
Like I said, it wouldn't be so bad if they were really your family.
But the Waynes were not your family. Not distant relatives or anything like that.
You were just living your life, as quietly as possible… and poof!
New room, new butler/grandfather, pets beyond belief, 4 new male siblings and a father with serious emotional constipation issues. And, to add more salt to your wound…. all have serious abandonment issues and death-related trauma.
After several escape attempts, sleep strikes, hunger strikes and any other kind of protest that an anarchist could be proud of… you realized that it was simply impossible to get out of this without risking the path of death.
Which, to top it all off, was also unreliable because apparently your older brother Jason had revived as well as another of your siblings. So no, dying was also not a viable option to which one could resort in the worst case scenario.
What to do?
Well, not much. Trying not to die of suffocation of affection or finding a way to have privacy while going to the bathroom just seemed to be the best survival tools you could resort to.
What does that entail?
It implies that Tim was going to give you hours and hours of lectures on his latest discovery of a case, even if you don't understand half the things he's told you or mentioned at all.
Richard and Damian trying to teach you new tricks almost every second, taking you to the Zoo or not leaving you alone to go to the bathroom.
That Jason, oh holy cow he is the only one more relaxed, takes you with him on his motorcycle to eat ice cream and to the public library. Without being able to scape, because it seems that you have a kind of GPS inserted in the bone marrow.
(Sometimes you don't know if it's true or not, but sometimes you also felt pain between your bones, almost during the cold seasons, and you didn't want to burst your poor little head thinking of different viable possibilities knowing them. No scars, no remembering anythins about any surgery).
Have a grandfather who will not hesitate to make you cookies, your favorite foods whenever you want … without leaving you aside at any time.
Plus a terribly quiet father, who if he can will carry you for as long as you spend time together, won't let you near the secret basement and enjoys being in the same room with you.
Do you see any privacy in this?
No, because even at the bathroom door would be the pets trying to get in and see you for themselves while you want to do your business.
The worst of that? Titus always judge you when you close the curtains.
As I mentioned and it was clear: Having a large family implies little privacy… Having a large, obsessive family means NO privacy.
So, knowing that you have over 50 nanochips tracking in all your clothes, two security monitors embedded - God knows how - in your body (monitors that only tell you if you are in designated safe place), 20 high definition surveillance cameras in every room and a Great Dane chasing you like a chick …. How the heck do you fall down the stairs and hit your pelvic bone without anyone noticing?
No kidding, how?
And if you had to blame someone for your fall… you'd totally blame Damian for it.
It's not that the kid pushed you down the stairs, but over time he had tamed himself into various things and relaxed into looking his age. You know!!! He started acting like a normal teenager!
What do Damian's kids do at his age? Well, they leave things lying around and have messing around them when they can, of course they do!
You just wanted some yogurt with orange marmalade. Maybe some oatmeal cookies. Alfred had left it for you in the fridge when he noticed you'd been watching video tutorials on homemade marmalade for hours. Who were you to deny such a gesture of generosity?
I mean, Alfred was the one who allowed you to hide in the attic for hours on end so you could have some time to yourself.
And how did it end? You, slipping down the main stairs of the old Wayne mansion, down a nicely polished wooden staircase, rolling all the way down (which is no small flight of stairs, it should be noted) to the bottom of the first floor.
Now, lying on the ground is not so bad in itself. What is bad is not being able to feel your legs and still not being able to understand how you manage to tidy up your neural wiring so that your legs can still move on their own and go to the kitchen to rescue all the delicacies Alfred left you in time.
And it's a good thing you managed to do it… because within seconds Bart had rushed in to ransack the fridge and the fruit basket.
But that's not the point.
The important thing is that this time you managed, I insist a little on the feat of action, to climb up to your room and not notice how you couldn't really feel your legs.
You ate, you lay down… and to your bad or good luck, you couldn't get up …. and without anyone noticing there was an emergency and everyone went out to sort it out.
Weak limbs, limited movement and you don't want to mention the embarrassing actions you did in order to go to the toilet.
It's not like you hid it either, I mean, there was no one who could even notice because they weren't entirely available to watch you. Nor is it that you would have run away, otherwise they would have been at your side in less than a second.
The detail, as they insist, is that you had probably bruised your back badly and your body was now taxing you extra for your food craving.
I insist, you did not hide anything.
But still, when you're found completely itchy on the floor, ridiculously trying to run away in the direction of the bathroom… that's when everyone really goes crazy.
First, having to carry you and not dying of embarrassment when you notice that Bruce definitely doesn't give a damn about having to carry you to the bathroom and do almost everything for you.
Or having Dick and Jason carry you and fit you into some kind of weird medical scanner they have in the cave.
Or that Tim keeps track of your periods, types of meds you take and, for fuck's sake, knows how the fuck to inject something into your spine.
Or that Damian had the gall to look a little embarrassed when he heard that a pair of boxers lying outside the laundry basket was to blame for all this.
NO matter.
At the end of the day they heal you, pamper you, leave you alone when you need to take a nap and figure out a way to fix it without looking like complete maniacs who built some kind of internal plumbing that sucks up the dirty laundry and throws it straight into the washing machine.
Like the time they didn't look like maniacs by sanding all the edges of the tables and nightstands.
Or the time they bought a whole brand of sanitary towels when they realised that not all women use tampons.
Don't worry, they're looking out for you… even if they look like deranged Arkhan freaks in the process.
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beomiracles · 3 months
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sex with a ghost ft yeonjun
─ dark lustful eyes pierce yours, "still think I'm not real, angel?", he taunts as he moves in and out of you slowly.
A/N ─ heh, hey :3 I've been working on this all evening but I sorta gave up on the proofreading part... it's 1am ok. My longest one part fic yet, coming in at 7.3k words exactly >_< I am DESPERATE to know your thoughts on it !!!!
pairings: ghost!taehyun x psychic!afab!reader warnings: major character death, slight descriptions of character death, ANGST, cheating???, eventual smut, fingering, oral (f rec), vaginal penetration, slight degradation but also praise, multiple love interests if you close your eyes squint and believe.
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A screeching sound can be heard echoing through the quiet neighbourhood as your car comes to a stop. You really needed to invest in a new one soon.
Gathering your supplies, you step out to be faced with a large apartment complex. The neighbourhood was foreign to you, though the houses looked to be well maintained.
Climbing the stairs to the entrance you curse yourself for choosing heels today. The doorbell rings, once, twice, you're greeted by an elderly woman's voice through the small speaker. "Hello ma'am, it's y/l/n, from-"
"Oh! Yes of course I know where you're from, come on in!", the doors swing open and you make your way through the entrance. The elevator makes a noise as the doors open on the seventh floor and you walk out.
The elderly lady whose voice you'd heard on the speaker is already standing in the doorway, waving you over. As you reach her you bow, "miss, y/l/n y/n, ma'am". The woman smiles as she introduces herself as Mrs Kang.
Mrs Kang leads you through the small hallway into a spacious living room with a marvellous view of the city. "Tea, coffee?", she asks as she takes place behind the counter in the joint kitchen space. "Just water will do fine, anything else tends to mess with my work", you say as you sit down by the dining table.
Taking out a wax candle you place it in the centre of the table. Around it you lay various dried herbs, the whole thing is finished off with a ring of salt around it. Mrs Kang returns with two glasses of water as she places one in front of you. You thank her and take a sip.
As Mrs Kang takes a seat in front of you she eyes the candle. You bring out a box of matches, "before I start, would you mind telling me about your son?".
The woman nods as she clears her throat, "I...well he passed just two months ago", she says, fingers picking at her cuticles in an anxious manner. "May I ask how?", your voice is soft as you keep your gaze on her.
Mrs Kang swallows, "it was a car accident, he...it was his friend who was behind the wheel", she shakes her head, "my Taehyunnie, he wasn't...he wasn't irresponsible like that he...", tears fill her eyes as she continuously shakes her head.
You offer her a tissue to which she silently thanks you. Wiping her eyes with shaking hands before she finally meets your gaze again. "It's wrong", she states, "I should not have to bury my child...". She holds back a sob as she continues, "I should witness him fall in love, g-get married and...", a sob escapes her throat, "a-and start a family of his own".
"He was so young", she cries, burrowing her face in the tissue. You extend your hand to caress hers. "I know, and I am so incredibly sorry for your loss".
Despite doing this for a living you still felt rather stale in situations like these. It felt as if you were invading a very private and personal part of her life.
As Mrs Kang's breathing slowly returns to normal you try and shift the direction of the conversation. "Why don't you tell me about how Taehyun was?" you give your most kindhearted smile. "What did he enjoy, was he afraid of something, did he have any dreams?"
Mrs Kang smiles, "he wanted to become a singer". She scoffs as she leans back in her chair, "I always told him he would do good as a model, he was very beautiful you know", she says and you nod, "I'm sure he was".
Mrs Kang shakes her head, "but there was no changing his mind, music was his sole passion". "The hours he would spend cooped up in his room, writing his heart away".
So he liked music? "And what about friends? A girlfriend?" Mrs Kang is silent for a moment, "he didn't have many friends growing up", she admits, "he wasn't very social...", a troubled look presents itself on her face, "perhaps I could've done more I.."
"You did an amazing job raising him, I'm sure", you say as your hand gives hers a squeeze. Mrs Kang gives you a thankful smile, "he did find a few friends through music", she frowns, "but he never brought a girl home".
She shakes her head, "but what do I know? he moved out years ago... I just, could never bring myself to do anything with his room...he's my only baby". Her bottom lip quivers slightly as her voice cracks, "and now...now it's all I have left of him.."
"I completely understand, and I appreciate you sharing all of this with me, I know it isn't easy for you". Mrs Kang nods as she blows her nose with the tissue before discarding it. "Whatever helps you maybe get in contact with him, I'm willing to do anything", she says, a hopeful look on her face.
"Then shall we get started?" you bring out a match, lighting it as you place it next to the wax candle. As the flame takes to life you blow out the match and place it down on the table.
You close your eyes as you take both of Mrs Kang's hands in your own. It doesn't take long before a familiar feeling fills your chest. It's sharp, pushing at your ribs, it feels as if they're about to crack, but it doesn't hurt.
That's how you know that there's something else present, someone else. "Kang Taehyun?" you ask and the surge in your chest grows tighter, you smile. "My name is y/n, I'm here with your mother", you can feel Mrs. Kang's grip on your hands tighten.
"He's here", you say as you open your eyes, "do you have any questions for him? anything you want him to know?". Mrs Kang nods, "I want to tell him that I love him..", she whispers, almost pleadingly. You nod.
"Your mother tells you that she loves you, Taehyun", you await his answer. The spirits never spoke verbally, but would send off different auras, they each held different emotions.
The surge in your chest suddenly felt warm, you smile, "he loves you too". Tears once again fill Mrs. Kang's eyes as she lets out a small sob, "ask him if he's happy, please, I need to know that my baby is alright".
You refocus your attention to the surge in your chest, "your mother asks if you're happy, Taehyun". You're unable to hide the surprise on your face as the pull on your chest immediately darkens, it's almost painful, you've never felt something quite like it before.
Mrs Kang is quick to notice the change in your expression, "what? what's wrong?", she asks worriedly. You shake your head as you close your eyes. The intensity of the surge grows with each second, "he's not happy", you admit and Mrs Kang lets out a small cry.
A soul lingers between the living and the dead for one of two reasons, it can stay behind to watch over loved ones, or it is unable to move on. Judging by the dark pull on your chest you would assume the latter. "Taehyun, why do you linger?", you ask, eyes closed.
The pull on your chest starts thumping rhythmically, almost like a heartbeat. It's quick, harsh, angry. Your eyes snap open, and your hand grips the collar of your shirt.
Mrs Kang immediately stops crying as she looks at you with a horrified expression, "what's wrong dear?" she exclaims. You shake your head, "I've never felt anything like this before", you admit as you take a deep breath.
The thumping is so loud that you fear your eardrums might burst. Quickly leaning forward you blow out the candle and everything comes to an abrupt stop.
It takes you a moment to recollect yourself as your breathing returns to normal. When it finally does you look up at Mrs Kang, "may I see his room?".
Taehyun's room is neat, it feels almost melancholic, frozen in time. Your hands graze along the the shelves filled with albums of different artists. His closet was empty, to be expected. Your gaze lingers on a piece of paper discarded on his desk.
Picking it up you study the words scribbled on it, the handwriting is neat but most of the words have been erased or drawn over. It looks to be lyrics, was it a song he worked on?
"That one was no good", a voice speaks. You shriek, immediately dropping the paper. As you turn around you're met with a young man, possibly in his early twenties. His short black hair lay messily atop his head, his eyes are dark as they study you. Hands digging deep into the pockets of his denim jeans.
"What the fu...who are you?", you ask as you take a step back, your legs hitting the desk behind you. The man raises an eyebrow, "thought we met already".
It takes a moment for you to piece together his words and his comment about the paper in your hand. The way he was standing so causally... as if it were his own room.
"Kang Taehyun?"
He smirks, "in the flesh, well not really". Your jaw goes slack as you stare at the man in front of you. "But...that's not possible, you're...you're",─"dead?", he asks to which you nod.
He shrugs as he takes a step toward you, "your black magic seems to have done a lot more than you expected it to". His dark eyes pierce yours as his brow twitches slightly, "I'll give you that though, I never really believed in the supernatural".
Your mind is still in shambles as you try and make sense of the situation, "how are you here? it makes no sense..". You blink, once, twice, but he remains. You close your eyes for a solid thirty seconds before peeking them open. "You're strange", Taehyun comments and you feel as if your legs are about to give out.
"This can't be happening", your hands claps around your head, "I must be going crazy, yeah that's it, I'm hallucinating". You let out a short laugh, "I really need to get more sleep, I'll take a nap as soon as I come home, yes, that'll solve it".
"Do all psychics talk to themselves?", he asks as he tilts his head. You breathe in, then out, "you're not real", it's a statement not a question. And just like that Taehyun vanishes, the tension in the room slowly lifts and you feel yourself relax as you blink a few times.
Then he suddenly appears again, closer, so close that you could touch him. "Then what am I?" he inquires. His pale hand reaches out to graze yours and you jump, knocking the decorations on his desk.
"Is that not real?", he asks to which you shake your head. Taehyun frowns, he looks almost as if he's about to say something but stops himself. He vanishes, but in less than a second he reappears, now sitting on his bed.
You're about to speak again but the sound of the bedroom door opening has you snapping your head in said direction. Mrs Kang enters, "is everything alright? I heard a noise..."
"I'm fine but I...", you begin as you turn toward the bed, it's empty. Taehyun was gone again.
Mrs. Kang thanks you over and over as she promises to treat you to dinner whenever you wished. You too, thanked her immensely for her hospitality and made sure that you would let her know should anything happen.
You didn't tell her about Taehyun, you were sure it had all been a hallucination. It was true, you were sleeping a lot less these days. You didn't know why, you had never had a problem with insomnia before but you suppose that surrounding yourself with the dead had a certain effect on people.
Still, it didn't explain the fact that you had felt his touch. His hand had been cold, hard as if made out of steel. It was like his whole body was frozen in time. Lucid hallucinations were not something you'd heard of so how...
Thinking that all you needed was a good nights sleep, you made your way home. The keys jingle in the lock as you twist them around in your hand. Kicking your damned heels off, you stumble into the kitchen.
Your hands still had a slight tremble to them as you poured yourself a glass of wine. Drinking on weekdays, alone, wasn't usually your forte but you figured that you needed it if you wanted to get any sleep tonight.
Bringing the glass to your lips you take a sip. "Didn't take you for a drinker", Taehyun's voice is loud, it feels as if its coming from within you. It startles you and the glass slips out of your hands and shatters onto the floor. Red liquor coating the wooden planks.
"Fuck", you look up to be met with Taehyun's figure on the other side of the countertop. "You followed me?". Taehyun shrugs, "if that's what you can call it".
You frown, this was way out of your level of knowledge. You had never heard of a spirit taking a physical form, even less clinging to a host. Were you the only one that could see him? Was that why he vanished when Mrs Kang entered the room?
"I don't understand...", you study his face, unable to read it. "I wish I did but it seems I am as clueless as you are", he says as he leans his forearms on the counter.
"I...I did nothing different today", you mumble as your mind retraces the events of the day. "Then how are you able to take on a physical form? granted I'm not going crazy of course".
"I couldn't, not before at least", he drawls, "then you came along", he smirks, "and suddenly I could". You thought you might've officially lost it now.
You cross your arms, "it doesn't explain why you're following me of all". He frowns, "you're the only one who will listen", he leans closer over the countertop, "I thought you knew that already".
I'm the only one who will listen? He had to imply that others did not see nor hear him. You chew on your bottom lip nervously, "you have to excuse my manners earlier", he grins, "it's been ages since I last had human interaction".
His words make your eyes snap back to him. That's right, he wasn't human, not anymore. He was a ghost, and the only reason he was still here was because he's either watching over someone, or he's unable to move on.
"Why don't you let your soul continue? Why do you still cling to this world?" you ask. Taehyun's expression visibly darkens to the point where he almost looks demonic. "I've got unfinished business here", his words are almost inaudible.
"Unfinished business? what kind?" you press for answers but Taehyun remains quiet. "Does it have anything to do with your mom? your friends? your music?". Every question has his muscles tensing further until he slams his fist down on the countertop, "quiet, please".
You gulp, his knuckles leave a small dent in the marble stone but his hand remains untainted. Despite his harsh outburst another question bubbles at the surface that is your mind. You can't help but ask it.
"Was...was your death not an accident?"
Taehyun's dark eyes find yours as he locks them in place. It feels as if the room temperature dropped at least ten degrees and a shiver creeps up your spine. Yet you stand your ground as you refuse to break eye contact with the ghost.
It's quiet for what feels like forever until the soft rattling of keys from somewhere in the hallway grabs your attention. "Babe, 'm home", a voice calls out and soon Yeonjun comes into vision.
He's carrying two bags of groceries as he sets them down on the countertop. "Hey, you okay? you look like you've seen a ghost", he says as he makes his way around the counter to you.
"I...", you eyes flicker between your boyfriend and the now empty spot where Taehyun had previously been. "Shit, what happened here?", he asks as he bends down to pick up the remains of the wine glass. You had completely forgot about that.
"Oh, right I...I'm just tired I, I was going to clean it up", you rush to help him but a hand on your wrist stops you. "Go rest, babe", Yeonjun smiles as he gives your forehead a kiss, "I'll make us dinner, yeah?".
After the two of you have eaten you offer to do the dishes since Yeonjun had been nice enough to cook for the two of you. Yet you felt your hands trembling as you turned the plates over in your hands.
The whole day had put your body in a state of constant unease and you felt watched at all times. Lean arms wrap around your waist causing you to jump in surprise, the plate falls out of your hands and down in the sink again. Luckily it doesn't break.
"What's wrong, babe?" Yeonjun asks against your neck as he presses a soft kiss to it. You shake your head, "it's just been a long day", you say, and it's partly the truth. Your boyfriend hums as he turns the sink off, "I'll finish it up, do you want me to stay the night?".
Not even thirty minutes later you're laid in bed, your boyfriend's arm draped across your waist as the comforting sounds of his snores fill the room.
Though you hadn't seen Taehyun since earlier that evening you still felt that he was there. You didn't know why but it put you on edge and it wasn't until the early morning hours when you finally fell asleep.
You wake up the next morning to an empty bed, as you make your way into the kitchen the dishes are done for you. A small note is placed on the fridge, "leftovers packed in the fridge for lunch, don't forget to eat, ─ love Yeonjun".
You smile as your fingers trace the outline of the small note. Glancing over at the oven clock confirms the fact that you had indeed slept in. Though your next client wasn't until this afternoon, it gave you plenty of time to get ready.
You don't see Taehyun, not when you shower, blow dry your hair, eat your breakfast or do your makeup. Leaving your supplies in the car the day before meant that it was only for you to get going. One last look in the mirror and you're off.
The google maps on your car glitches a couple times making your way to the client's house a huge detour. Nonetheless you still manage to make it in time.
When you arrive you're greeted by the younger man who'd called. He looked your age, perhaps even younger. He led you through the small hallway and kitchen into a cute living room.
The house spoke to you in many ways and you found yourself admiring the paintings on the walls as you waited whilst he brought the two of you some water.
He sits on the sofa across from you, wiping his hands nervously on his pants. You smile, "I understand that you have called me regarding your late grandfather, correct?", he nods.
"He passed almost four years ago...", he says as he looks down at his hands. "May I ask how?", your voice is soft as you place your hands on your lap. "Cancer", he says and you nod, "I am incredibly sorry for your loss", you reach a hand out to grab his.
His eyes widen as they travel between yours and the way your hands interlinked. "If you trust me, I will be happy to reach out to him for you", you say and the man nods.
"I will require both of your hands", you say as you extend your other hand, he quickly takes it. His hands feel sweaty against your own, probably nerves you thought.
Closing your eyes you search for that familiar pull on your chest. When you find it you instantly smile, the pull is soft and gentle, like that of an old person.
"Mr Park, my name is y/n, I'm here with your grandson", you say. The pull on your chest instantly blooms into warmth. "He's here", you smile.
As you blow out the small candle the pull on your chest seizes. The man is quick to thank you over and over. You notice how his hands still haven't let go of yours.
"He likes you".
Taehyun's voice is a stark contrast to that of the man in front of you as he sits on the sofa next to him. If you were surprised by his appearance the man in front of you hadn't seemed to notice.
You frown toward Taehyun, but his gaze is fixated on the man next to him. "I uhm, I wanted to say that I really admire the work you do.." he says shyly and you smile.
"What an ass kisser", Taehyun comments in a disgusted tone, "he just wants to get you in bed, it's written all over him", he grimaces. You ignore him as you offer the man a smile. "Thank you", you say as you squeeze his hands in an attempt to make him let go.
He lets go as he nervously begins to fiddle with his fingers, "I was hoping...no, wanting to ask if...", he clears his throat nervously, "if maybe I could see you again?" You nod, "if you would like to request my services again that's completely fine just-"
"No I...I was wondering if I could see you...", he says as his face flushes with color. Oh. Taehyun scoffs and averts his gaze, arms folding over his chest.
"I'm uh, I'm afraid that's not possible", you say as you rub your wrist awkwardly. He quickly nods and clears his throat, "right, of course, it's quite alright", he reassures as he stands up. "I'll see you out?", you give him an awkward smile as you nod. "That would be nice".
Despite having had a shower that same morning your body yearned for a second one. The sweat of that man felt as if It clung to you and the whole situation had been so awkward that you just wanted to get in the shower and wash it all off.
The warm water cascaded down your body and your ran your fingers through your hair. For some reason you found your mind wandering to Taehyun and you didn't like it. He made you feel an unexplainable way.
He had pestered you all way home, dodging all your questions about him and somehow always managing to turn the conversation around on you. Only for him to disappear once the car parked outside your apartment.
"He was practically fucking you with his eyes the whole time", he said as he leaned back against the leather of the passenger seat. You roll your eyes, "he wasn't".
Taehyun snorts, "how would you know, you kept your eyes shut the majority of it". Your hands grip the steering wheel tighter, "what's it to you anyway?".
He looks you up and down as he grins, "nothing really". You sigh, "then why bring it up in the first place", you mumble as you keep your eyes on the road ahead. Taehyun doesn't answer.
The warm water did little to ease the tension in your muscles and you turned the shower off and got out. Wrapping a towel around your body you begin running your hands through your wet hair.
A cool sensation against your neck has you spinning around only to be met with nothing but air. You frown as you turn back to the mirror, grabbing the blow dryer as you plug it in.
A cold hand on your shoulder makes you jump and you turn around to come face to face with Taehyun. "What the fuck!" you shriek as you pull the towel closer around yourself.
"Just because you can appear at your own will doesn't give you the right to invade my privacy", you retort as you cross your arms over your chest tightly.
A smirk creeps its way up on his face, "this is the least I've invaded your privacy so far", he says as he takes a step toward you. "You think?" you snap back.
Taehyun tilts his head to the side before vanishing. His voice echoes through your mind, "would you rather I stay up here?". The sensation has your head pounding and you press a palm against your forehead. "No, get out", you order and to your surprise he complies.
A fragment of a second later he's in front of you again, a smirk on his face. He reaches a pale hand up to trace your jawline and neck. His fingers are cold as they leave a trail of goosebumps in their wake.
"What are you.."
"I like you".
His words have your eyes widening but Taehyun's expression is indifferent. "What?" Your tone does little to hide your disbelief.
Taehyun's thumb grazes your bottom lip, and you let him. Why? you didn't have an answer. "I said I like you", he repeats as his hand falls back to his side.
You shake your head, "you don't, you're confused, it's normal your soul is in a transitional state". He chuckles, "you think you got me all figured out huh?". You frown, "what are you implying?".
He takes a step closer, cold chest almost touching your warm one. "I'm...drawn to you", he speaks slowly, as if choosing his words carefully. You sigh, "because I'm the first person you've interacted with since your death, it'll pass", you assure.
"Really?" he asks, a playful grin on his face. "What am I to do until then?" his lips form into a slight pout. You were sure he could hear your heart literally pounding out of your chest.
The sharp ring of your doorbell has him gone in a second. You breathe out a heavy sigh of relief. Remembering that you had ordered takeout before your shower quickly has your mind shifting. Pulling on a robe you make your way to the door as you retrieve your food. Sitting down on the sofa, you pull out your phone to text Yeonjun.
"Come over tonight."
The bed squeaks in rhythm to the deep thrusts of your boyfriend as he pounds you into the mattress. Bare legs wrapped around his waist your long nails claw at his back.
His hand grips onto the headboard as the other gently caresses your cheek. "Look so fuckin' gorgeous tonight, babe", he groans as his face contorts into one of pleasure.
Your lips part in a soft moan as your back arches off the bed. Sex with Yeonjun was bliss. It always seemed to get your mind off things and relax you.
His head dips down to kiss and suck at your neck and your eyes flutter closed in pleasure. When they open again your heart almost stops as you find Taehyun's eyes staring right back at your own.
Hands in his pockets he leans against the wall as he looks at you. Only you, it's as if he's not even registering that Yeonjun is present. His gaze moves from your fucked out face, down your naked body. It stops at your core, as Yeonjun's cock slides in and out of your throbbing cunt. He stares shamelessly, a small smirk tugging at his lips.
Your grip on your boyfriends hair grow painfully harsh earning a soft groan from Yeonjun, "need more?", he asks. You nod, your eyes locked with Taehyun's as you speak, "yes, need it so bad".
The night Taehyun had watched you get fucked out by your boyfriend had been the last time you saw him. Four days had passed without as much as a peep from him.
You were relieved, ready to put it all behind you. Writing it off as a weird hallucination of sort. It must've all been in your head. Though a part of you, a very small part, felt weird.
It wasn't that you missed him, you thought. But something was gnawing away at you every moment spent without even feeling the presence of his soul, tugging at your chest.
You had even for a split moment considered to bring out your supplies and summon him yourself. Thought you quickly discarded the idea again.
Your days were slow, uneventful and almost boring. Yeonjun was away on a business trip and you had spent the past nights alone in your dark bedroom. He wouldn't be home for another three days, you groaned at the thought.
Scrolling mindlessly on your phone as the late evening turns into early night. You didn't have any clients tomorrow so you didn't see an issue with staying up.
By 2am your eyes finally began to feel heavy. Putting your phone away you pulled the blanket over yourself as you got comfortable. You had almost drifted off into a deep sleep when the light squeak of the floorboards made your eyes snap open.
Sitting up, you pulled the covers closer to your chest as you squinted in the darkness. It was quiet, but you knew that you weren't alone. The tugging sensation in your chest had returned, he had returned.
"Taehyun..?" your voice is barely above a whisper but a soft hum coming from somewhere in the room confirms your suspicions. Carefully reaching over, you flick on the lamp on the bedside table.
The room is immediately cast in a dim light as Taehyun's figure comes into vision. He's standing exactly where he had been, four days ago.
Was it bad that you were relieved to see him? Probably. Yet you couldn't hide the smile etching its way to your face.
Something was different about him, you couldn't pin point it until your gaze met his. Dark eyes were piercing yours much like they had the first time you met, but this time they held something else, lust.
You barely have time to blink and he's by your side. Standing next to the bed he towers over you from where you're sitting. Cold fingers slide under your chin as he turns your face up.
Your lips part in surprise as your eyes widen, "T-Taehyun..?". His thumb pulls at your bottom lip before he lets it go. He lets out a frustrated sigh as he takes a few steps back.
Left confused you shift awkwardly on the bed. "What's going on...?", you whisper, he doesn't reply. It's strange, you hadn't seen or heard from him for four days and now, he just shows up acting all strange without even speaking to you.
"Listen Taehyun, I..", your words get stuck in your throat as he suddenly appears in front of you. Your back is pushed against the headboard as Taehyun cages you against it. Arms on either side of your head, his hands grip the headboard tightly. His knees hit the soft mattress as he straddles you.
"You what?", he asks, his voice is low, rumbling from deep in his chest. You swallow, "I...uhm...I...", your eyes shift from his own to his lips. Your tongue subconsciously darts out to wet your lips as your gaze travels back up to his eyes.
Taehyun lets out a frustrated groan as he mumbles something under his breath. You can't make the words out and before you know it his lips are on yours.
Your eyes widen but only for a moment before they flutter closed. His lips are cool against yours, but it's not unpleasant. The kiss is tender but it's full of desire. A sense of longing and yearning emits from him as his lips move softly against yours.
Though Taehyun is quick to pull back, he studies your face for a reaction. You bite your bottom lip softly as your gaze falls on his lips. "One more", he breathes out before crashing his lips against yours once again.
This time he doesn't hold back as his tongue forces its way inside your mouth. You happily comply as your lips part, your hands find their way to his hair, tugging softly at the ends.
Teeth clash together as Taehyun presses himself impossibly closer to you. His hands move from the headboard to gently cup your cheeks. His touch is electrifying.
But is it right? Your mind goes to Yeonjun, your boyfriend. You had a boyfriend for christ's sake, yet here you are making out with...with a ghost.
Could it count as cheating if he wasn't even a real person? You didn't know, and in that moment you couldn't bring yourself to care.
Taehyun is first to pull away as you chase after his lips, a soft whine emitting at the loss of him. He smirks, "so eager", he coos as his thumb massages your saliva coated lips.
His other hand finds the end of your blanket as he pulls it down. You're wearing nothing but your satin nightgown, it barely reaches your upper thighs. Perked nipples prominent through the thin fabric.
"Don't tell me you've been getting this dolled up every night", he mumbles as cold fingers trail along your collarbone, down the centre of your chest.
You shiver as you squirm under him, "you wear this for him too?", he glances up toward you. You bite your lip as you shake your head no. You usually wore something more comfortable to bed, but the past four days had been affecting you greatly. Perhaps it was the absence of your boyfriend, or maybe it was the absence of the soul you had grown so accustomed to in such a short time.
Taehyun hums in approval as he pushes the thin gown over your hips, revealing the white lace concealing your aching core from him. Index finger finds the hem of your panties as he pulls it up, "and these?".
Your face flushes all shades of red as your eyes meet his, "they're new..", you whisper. Taehyun lets go of the fabric wrapped around his finger, it snaps back against your skin.
"A shame for them to get ruined on their first wear", he says as he presses his thumb against your clothed clit. A soft gasp escapes your lips as your thighs twitch slightly. "But you don't mind do you, angel?"
The nickname catches you off guard, and it makes your cunt clench around nothing. His other hand rubs small circles on your hip as his fingers on your clit move your panties to the side.
"Knew you'd be fucking perfect", he slides two fingers inside of you without much struggle and you arch off the bed with a whimper. The hand on your hip holds you back down against the mattress as Taehyun watches his fingers slide in and out of your dripping pussy.
"That boyfriend of yours aint enough?" he tilts his head as he looks at you, your lips parted as soft moans spill from your mouth. "Greedy fucking bitch", his fingers curl inside of you making you cry out in pleasure, "one guy aint enough for you?"
You shake your head, "n...need you", you whimper. Taehyun hums softly, "you will". He retracts his fingers making you whine at the loss of contact, "let me taste you first, dollface".
His fingers are quickly replaced by his soft breath as he inhales the scent of you. "Smell like fucking heaven, angel", he groans, "bet you taste like it too".
Your thighs clench around his head as he presses his tongue flat against your clit. Hands in his hair, you force his face closer to your throbbing cunt. Soft whines and moans leave your lips and when he inserts his tongue you swear you see stars.
Air wasn't a necessity for Taehyun and he used it to his advantage as he devoures your cunt like it was his last meal, ironically enough it could've been.
Cold hands caresses your plush thighs as they tremble under his ministrations. A familiar feeling fills your stomach as your climax approaches. Taehyun looks up from between your legs and you swear that the way he looked at you almost made you orgasm on the spot.
"Gonna give me a taste of your heaven, angel?"
You whimper as your orgasm cruises through you, Taehyun is quick to greedily lick and feast on your high, his nose stimulating your clit as he does in an almost taunting way.
Once your legs stop trembling he finally sits up, wiping his face with the back of his hand. You're left a panting mess as you lock eyes with him. "Can you give me one more, dollface?" he asks as one of his hands palms himself through his jeans. You eagerly nod.
His smirk is the last thing you see before he grabs you by your thighs, pulling you down so that you lay flat on your back. Propping himself up on one arm Taehyun leans over you, fingers brushing a strand of hair out of your face as the tip of his cock prods at your cunt.
He leans down to connect your lips with his as he slides himself inside. Thick cock stretching you out in a blissful way, you moan against his lips.
"Greedy fucking pussy sucking me in like it's been starved", he says as his lips move down your neck and collarbone. He moves slowly, filling you out with each thrust. "Bet it has", he says as he teeth graze the flesh of your breast.
"Your boyfriend is sloppy", he grunts as he thrusts back inside of you, "doesn't know that he's got heaven right in front of him". His mouth finds your nipple through the thin material of your nightgown, twisting and pulling it between his teeth.
You whimper and feel yourself clench around him, pulling a groan from Taehyun as he sucks marks onto your chest and neck. One of his hands travels down your thighs, pushing it up, allowing him to sink deeper into you as you both moan in union.
"Shit angel, you were made for me", he breathes out as your lips find each other in a messy exchange of kisses. Pulling away for a short moment, his dark lustful eyes pierce yours, "still think I'm not real, angel?", he taunts as he moves in and out of you slowly.
"Just shut up and kiss me", you moan as you pull his lips back down on yours again. You can feel his smirk against your lips as he snaps his hips against yours, earning a loud cry from you.
Your breath grows short and ragged as you feel your second orgasm of the night approach. Taehyun's thumb finds your abused clit as he rubs it teasingly. "Gonna cum for me a second time, angel?"
Your cunt throbs around him as you release all over his cock, hands pulling at his hair as a soft whimper escapes your lips. Taehyun's teeth graze your skin as he buries his face in your neck, a low groan leaving his lips as he finishes deep inside of you.
The sensation is unlike anything you've felt with anyone before, not even with Yeonjun. Taehyun rests his forehead against your as he waits for you to catch your breath, the perks of being dead you suppose.
His gaze remains lustful as he studies your face but there's something else too. The back of his hand gently caresses your cheek as he speaks, "my room, on the desk, top drawer to the right, there's a blue USB stick, take it".
His words confuse you, but he doesn't let you overthink it as he reconnects your lips in a soft kiss.
When you wake up the next morning Taehyun is gone. At first you think that the previous night might've just been a feverish dream, but the mess that were your bedsheets and your missing panties told you otherwise.
A warm shower later you're sat by the TV. Taehyun's words from the night before still ringing in your ears. "USB stick, desk, top right drawer", what did significance did the small device hold? There was only one way to find out.
You still knew the way to Mrs. Kang's apartment, she greeted you with a smile. After a rather long moment of small talk you find yourself in Taehyun's room.
Heading straight for his desk you pull out the top drawer to the right. And just like he said there it was, a small blue USB stick, you take it.
When you arrive back home you rush to your computer, as you plug it in a small set of files pop up. Curious you click the first one, at first it's dark, you frown, was it broken?
Then an image floods the screen, no a video, your eyes widen, it's a dash cam. More specifically it's the dash cam of the car that had taken Taehyun's life.
Anxiously you skip ahead, it's not until a few days later when the event actually takes place. Taehyun passes by the front of the car as he makes his way to the passenger seat.
While in the car you can only make out their voices, the engine roars to life as the car starts moving. They drive for a good thirty minutes, their conversation shifting between ordinary subjects.
It's not until they make it out on the highway that things start going wrong.
"Hey, slow down", Taehyun says. The car is visibly moving faster than the ones surrounding them. "I'm trying!" his friend then exclaims, his voice slightly panicked.
"What the fuck do you mean? Just slow down!", Taehyun's voice rises, and his friend curses under his breath. "I fucking told you I'm trying, it's not working the brakes..."
You close your laptop. You don't want to see what you already know is bound to happen. Though it's clear that someone messed with the car beforehand.
Taking a deep breath you reopen your laptop, clicking off the file you go back in time. It takes you a couple of hours to go through all the footage but then you find it.
Almost five days earlier, a man you don't recognise comes into frame. He walks around the car a few times, slowly, cautiously as he scans the area.
Then he gets inside, so he had a key? You don't exactly know what he's doing but you know enough to be certain that he's not fixing the oil. After a mere five minutes he exits the car and leaves.
That's what Taehyun wanted you to see. It wasn't a car accident, it was murder. And the person guilty was yet to be caught. It would explain why he wasn't able to move on.
You had to get this USB stick in the right hands. And that's exactly what you did.
The footage proved to be crucial evidence directly linking the man to the crime. He had turned out to be a direct family member of Taehyun's friend.
When Mrs Kang found out she was heartbroken. Though she thanked you immensely for finding out the truth behind her son's passing. You continued to visit her regularly after that.
You never saw Taehyun again, but every now and then a warm pull at your chest would remind you of his gratitude toward you and that he was forever indebted to you.
→ want to get notified whenever a new dream is published? join my TAGLIST ★ all rights reserved ─ @beomiracles 2024
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moonastro · 5 months
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mini message from your fs
pick a picture
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left to right(top)-> 1,2,3
left to right(bottom)-> 4,5,6
*this took me quite a bit of time to write and i would appreciate the support that you give me, please enjoy this post as much as i enjoyed making it!*
°DO NOT take this as literal, take everything with a grain of salt as this is purely and intendedly for entertainment purposes. °Don't be afraid to give feedback and opinions about this post (as i would entirely appreciate it). ° This is a GENERAL reading, take what resonates and leave and pass on what does not!
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pile 1-
"hi, i haven't done this before so please understand me☺️. i have been focusing on myself lately and kind off forgot about the people around me. i tend to do that sometimes. right now i may not be in the right physical mentality to be in a relationship but i always seem to think about you- literally, even if i don't mean to. please understand that our time together will come one day and there is no rush at all, after all the saying goes, 'good things come to those who wait.' when the time comes i am sure to have healed and be in the right mental space in order to take extra good care of you. i feel like you think about me also, you may even feel strong emotions when thinking of me but hold on just a little longer, i promise our time will come."
aww this person seems to be focusing on themselves at this time and it is important for them to do so. i think that they have went through a heartbreak and they are taking time off from any committed relationships as of now, they may be isolating themselves more than usual and that's just because they are regaining their mentality and energy.
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pile 2-
"um, this is a bit awkward, not you but me, i tend to have awkwardness crawling next to me at all times. sorry, for the babbling, i have actually gotten a new job, a job that i have never had any experience in so that's really what I'm focusing on at the moment. it's a job that requires me to be independent and not rely on anyone else which i am very grateful for. this is actually a great time to remind myself to say this to you as i feel like i am quite distant with you sometimes. i dream about you...like a lot. it truly awakens something in me, passion, lust perhaps?? i actually don't know the feeling, its so unique that i only feel it when i see you in my dreams. i secretly want to feel that feeling all the time so i purposely sleep a lot just to see you. i need to pick myself up and sort my life out, I'm in a bit of a mess right now but that's just life you know?? i hope to someday release the feeling that i crave every night and i hope that day is near!"
wow, i feel like this person has strong feelings towards you, you may be connected spiritually and communicate regularly in the higher dimensions. they seem to be learning how to routinise their life and their life seems very busy and tiring. i feel like you guys will meet very soon as both are heading in the right direction.
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pile 3-
"hey! oh how i need you in my life. every day i feel like a puzzle piece walking around longing for my other half, i feel very empty. not in a bad way of course, its just i know we are meant to be together and I'm a bit impatient at this point. how long is this going to take?? i guess i have been avoiding meditating and practising my wellness and that's why i have been battling with my thoughts 24/7. thinking of you makes me feel very powerful and secure. when you appear in my mind you clear every last of my bad thoughts, thank you for that!! maybe i can thank you soon? please tell me you are on your way to me? please. please. please... don't make me wait any longer. i do escape my reality, i tend to leave my house and sneak through the window to walk at night. i feel like that calms me? do you prefer night over the daytime too?? i feel like you do, oh we already have one thing in common imagine how many other thousands of things we relate to. i cant wait to talk to you, i really cant."
your person is rather impatient!! like really impatient. but i feel like they need the nurture from someone and they may be lacking that as well. they sound like they are struggling with their thoughts and overthink a lot, especially about the bad things. they are constantly trying to figure out what may be the problem, they may be new to this lifestyle and they are constantly trying to flee their problem instead of confronting them.
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pile 4- 18+
"i feel you. i breathe you. i crave you. if you think i don't know you, oh no no i literally think of you all the fricken time. thinking of you makes me cxm. i cant wait to be intimate with you, i don't care if we don't know each other in real life, i want you! you make me want to touch myself, but how can i perform the act without you??? i sometimes think that I'm going insane but deep down i know that you are here with me. i really hope you are prepared for me baby. just a heads up, i may be out of control when things get too intimate if you know what i mean. but i am trying to control that because the last thing i want is to hurt you. i will worship you like a god, i will kneel down and worship you right in front of you, that's how much you mean to me. I'm not a committed relations typa person, i am waiting for you and saving myself for the fun that we will have."
pheww, wowwww wow wow, your person is very sexual. they sound like someone who connects with someone through being intimate and they are waiting for you to do so, sooo don't be surprised if there is crying and lots of raw emotions being released when you two perform the act. this will be very sacred for them, and you will be their art and world and basically their everything.
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pile 5-
"hi lovely, just popping in to tell you that i am on my way to you. please don't be afraid, it is time for us to finally become one. i am finally ready!! aren't you excited? because i am so excited. every day i am getting closer and closer to meeting you and that makes me feel like a noodle- absolutely WEAKK. your presence is so strong darling, you wont need to be so strong when i appear in your life. we will grow together and i feel like you learned enough life lessons and that why this is possible in the first place. we have completed our lessons. i am so so proud of us. i am ready to finally settle down and commit to you. you are like the sun and i am the plant, leaning towards the sun, please keep shining my dear! we will make this work, together!!!!"
aw such a sweet message, your person is definitely such a cutie. they are definitely ready for marriage and to have a stable relationship. i do however think that they may speak a different language or are from a different country as i feel like there will be some set backs to your communication, but as your person said, you will make it work!
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pile 6-
"hi, i have been daydreaming quite a lot...maybe about you. but that's really not important.. perhaps it is, i have been exploring new ways of expressing my emotions, been practising quite a bit. i think that i miss out on many opportunities because of my daydreaming but that's how i connect with you!! there i said it, do people really want me to break the only connection that we have together? are people that cruel? they just don't understand! music is my go to, i speak to you through music so please listen to music more. i have some things to learn and unfold but please don't worry about me! i don't want you to stress over me, i know you have your own set of problems so please don't add more to your list. can i tell you a secret? i am on a difficult path right now and its all my fault! we cant be together as soon as we would of want all because of my stupidity! but you are the star in this connection so i have my whole trust in you. please wait for me. can you promise me that?"
so your person really blames themselves a lot. it is not their fault at all, it is just that they need to learn more lessons than an average person. they feel hopeless and lost at this time so their energy is all over the place. they do lose their ability to focus as they are distracted by the tempting things in life and that sets them back.
that is it for this post!!
wow, i really enjoyed doing this reading, i had a lot of fun writing this, some messages were so cute and others steamy lol. but i hope you guys enjoyed this as much as i did!!
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strawb3rrystar · 3 months
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Requesting some Hazbin Hotel angst!!!
The hazbin hotel characters will have a crush on the F!Reader, not knowing that they uh drowned. once they found out, you know what will happen!!
Charlie is mostly the first one to cry tbh
(do it whenever u want!! I luv ur work)
The paradox of a water trap.
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Pairing: Charlie Morningstar, Vaggie, Husk, Sir Pentious, Lucifer Morningstar, Adam, Vox, Valentino x Fem! Reader
Warnings: Reader has fish gills, talks of death, drowning, working for val, waterboarding
Word count: 349
✰Masterlist
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Charlie will obviously burst into tears when she finds out how you died. She'll give you the biggest hug ever and will not let go. She feels really sorry for you. Even though she has never experienced death before, she knows that drowning is one of the worst ways to do so.
Vaggie will be shocked that your cause of death was drowning. She probably won't cry. But, she'll give you her condolences and maybe a hug. But, she'll also find it quite ironic, yet strangely fitting that you have fish gills.
Husk will be mildly shocked that your cause of death was drowning. He'll be more so shocked that you got stuck with fish gills. He finds it's just rubbing salt into the wound. Another sinner who won't cry.
Sir Pentious will be the next one to cry out of this bunch. He'll feel absolutely terrible that he even asked you how you died. Will end up apologizing profusely. He'll also awkwardly wrap you into the biggest, snake hug of your afterlife.
Lucifer will be shocked. Gasped and wide eyed. Also cries, while apologizing. Like Charlie, he's never experienced death. But he can imagine what it's like and he feels just awful for you.
Adam will probably laugh if I'm being honest. Like, a part of him feels sorry for you. But the other part thinks you're stupid for getting yourself killed in such a dumb way. Even if it wasn't your fault, that part of him is just too much and he'll make fun of you.
Vox will find it quite amusing that you drowned. You're probably afraid of water, so being with him in the meeting room is a nightmare, because you're surrounded by water. Will joke that you're matching because his design is based off a shark and you have fish gills.
Valentino will also be quite amused. If you work for him and you're afraid of water. Good luck. Because he'll force you to do a waterboarding porn while he gets a kick out of watching you have the worst time of your afterlife.
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Star's notes -> I am so sorry about Adam's and Val's, that was a bit much tbh
(Thank you, @anothertdplayer for requesting!) (Requests are open!)
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Taglist -> @alexandria-fandom @corruptcoder @astrolovedy @perfectlycraftychaos @stressedbleach @idontreallyexistyet @ghostdoodlen @roboticsuccubus83 @blood-heart22 @myamythos @samohxt2-0 @mollzaj @t0uchst4rv3d @sunshines-bright | Join the taglist
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I just got out of my psychology class and I kept having thoughts about Leon and how his mind works. Here’s a psychoanalysis on Leon bc I truly do like how his brain works:
TW: mentions of mental illnesses, substances, substance abuse, suicide. (Guys- I am not a medical psychologist or a medical psychiatrist. This is strictly based on my psychology class, take this with a grain of salt.)
Leon suffers from Combat and Violence Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). This type of PTSD (because there’s subcategories) is most often common in veterans and in men.
More often than not, one can tell when someone’s suffering PTSD (flat voice, substance abuse, inability to sleep, change in personality, etc.)
Leon in RE2/RE2R didn’t necessarily show signs of PTSD until after the events took place. Leon was too busy trying to survive that his brain shut off the emotions he was feeling “in the heat of the moment.” He was scared but it was his survival instinct that allowed him (or the player) to move forward. Hence why I think he also suffered from Depression and Acute Stress Disorder (ASD).
ASD is commonly found in patients with PTSD, ASD is kind of like the first stage after a traumatic event took place. PTSD victims often find themselves having frequent panic attacks. I think it would be safe to assume that Leon in RE2/RE2R had several panic attacks during or after Raccoon City. I don’t think he’d go to therapy/psychiatrist/psychologist because in RE4R he stated that he immediately got called to the White House after he survived RC. And this is where I think it got worse.
RE4 and RE4R both portray very distinct Leon characters. One is more “fine” than the other in short words. Leon in RE4og doesn’t necessarily show signs of having mental issues but maybe he’s just good at masking them. Leon in RE4og often finds himself being very witty or very lean back. He’s less serious but I think it’s a coping mechanism. Up to that point in his life, he’s been in very serious situations that I think this is his way of gaining some of that control he lost when the virus first started. His brain is fighting battles of being in control or letting others control him. In this case- the situation is controlling him. He wants to have that sense of individuality and most of the time this is a coping mechanism. To gain back some of the things he’s lost in the process.
In RE4R, however (and I’m going to be very bold with this one), we don’t know much about how he feels. He is flat and his demeanor is distant to an extent. I’ve noticed a few changes to him from when he first started the game to where the player made it halfway. In the beginning of the game (when he’s with the two Spanish cops) he’s similar to RE4og- sarcastic and a little unserious. Which can be guessed as his normal personality. He doesn’t really show how much he’s actually been through with those two strangers. He’s got better things to worry about- he neglects his own issues. When he tries to find Ashley and he sees the zombies again- his PTSD gets triggered and it makes him be able to pull the trigger (aside from the player lol) There are few types of reactions when PTSD gets triggered and I think Leon’s reaction is a bit depressing.
When Leon sees these zombies again, his brain automatically jumps back to the memories of Raccoon City and almost immediately finds himself back in his former self’s shoes. But he doesn’t have time to linger, he forces those thoughts away and keeps going. I don’t think he wants to have time to think about what just happened because he’s often trying to keep his brain occupied “sorry, must’ve slipped” or any other phrase he says makes me believe that he’s just trying to make himself laugh (because believe it or not, laughter really does help with mental issues) or he’s trying to make the situation seem lighter. Or maybe he’s in denial, his brain hasn’t processed that the same thing that happened in RC is happening all over again. And when you’re in denial, you are repressed. Sigmund Freud said that repression is when someone turns something (trauma, thoughts, events, feelings) away. They deliberately choose to cast their thoughts and feelings aside. Leon bottles his emotions, it’s his defense mechanism. He doesn’t smoke (as mentioned in the game) nor does he drink (there’s a Reddit post that perfectly summed it up for me) He knows substances aren’t good for you and the fact that he’s against them makes me believe that he has other ways of dealing with PTSD such as exercise. I’m not saying this just because Leon looks very built, I want to think that maybe half the reason he works out isn’t just for his job. I think it also because it helps him mentally.
Mobility, sleep, and nutrition are the most important things to keep yourself mentally and physically healthy.
I’ll get on to RE6 because in that game, he pulled a 180 imo. RE6 Leon is more empathetic. He cares about the people that could’ve survived. He suffers from survivor’s guilt. After RE4/RE4R, Leon probably became more aware of his struggles and has tried to deal with them. He’s become more human, he’s allowed himself to feel human. He’s still the same serious guy with the flat effect but he’s becoming more open about his thoughts and feelings. I think the game is trying to hint at us that MAYBE he’s getting better. (Guys this is a stretch okay. RE6 is lowkey messy)
Now on to the films (I’ve done the liberty of researching a ‘order’ of when these may have taken place and not by the release date order so you guys won’t get confused):
ID Leon: He’s very compassionate in this one. He has a sense of self righteousness but I know why. He wants to make up for the losses of the people he’s seen die. He wants to fight against the corporation and wants to end the spread (submarine scene when he talks about RC) He wants to make up for what he couldn’t save. (Hence why he didn’t give Claire the chip- he wanted to protect her because he cares for her)
Degeneration Leon: Protection can only go a long way. Leon is more… assertive in his objectives, if you will. He’s back in his RE4 days in other words (any of the two games tbh, this Leon is complex) Leon wants to keep fighting for his cause. Not only is he forced to be a soldier for the government but he also has found a drive. All his pent up PTSD and trauma has shifted into something else. If no one could’ve been the hero then HE’LL be the hero himself, does that make sense?
Damnation Leon: Haha Russia go brr (sorry) Again, he’s become more chill. When he’s with JD, he’s funny but still cautious (bc let’s be honest, JD could’ve still shot his ass) nothing much to comment, I think he’s been consistent since Degeneration.
Vendetta Leon: NOW WE GETTING JUICY. This man- this Leon is the epitome of what a relapse does to you. Leon is seen drinking away his problems. He’s relapsed back into the mentality where his brain is finally processing everything. He’s even tried to attempt suicide- that’s how bad he got. His PTSD, his ASD, depression (bc you can’t tell me he didn’t have depression) it all came back to him and it made him feel shitty. He lost his power over himself, he no longer feels useful. He feels empty and broken. That’s sh he drowns himself in his own sorrows. Because he’s learned that if you drink until you pass out, you don’t dream. He doesn’t sleep- no. He’d rather black out because when you’re in an unconscious state, you don’t dream at all. You’re simply just lying there on the floor with your eyes closed. And that’s the feeling Leon wants to feel. He wants to forget everything for one minute and just calm down. And alcohol does that to you, that’s why people with PTSD become addicted to substances.
DI Leon: homeboy somehow got better (I’ve yet to watch DI lol) but from what I’ve seen, he’s definitely back to his “normal” self. He probably learned that maybe living life is the best thing. That if his attempt would’ve succeeded, then he wouldn’t have been able to live to his fullest. Regret makes people do a lot of things and I think Leon matured and learned.
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sillybruja · 22 days
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random placement observations: natal chart edition pt. 1
DISCLAIMER: I am not a professional astrologer, this purely my observation based on repetitive patterns I notice within the signs, placements, houses etc. Take what I say with a grain of salt and understand not every astrology observation will resonate.
Aquarius moons and their mommy issues go under the radar too much. In my experience, I have noticed Aquarius moons have the most complicated, sometimes love/hate relationship with their mother's. There's usually some sort of disconnect between the placement person & their mom, and it is usually because the mom fails to fully understand Aquarius moon's personality, or need for personal freedom. Mothers to these individuals tend to have issues with boundaries -- either they are too overbearing, or too under involved -- which leads the Aqua moon person to sometimes want to crawl out of their own skin. I've also notice ppl with this placement having trouble with coddling by a mother figure, or generally having a harder time gaining independence due to the specific or unique way the person was raised.
Venus conjunct pluto: This aspect, to me, manifests very differently based on what chart it is in. Venus and Pluto making contact usually can suggest some obsession / hyperfocus becoming present in your life. While on one hand this can definitely suggest that a person with this natal placement can tend to be obsessive in love, or with money, material resources, etc - it usually mostly suggests the types of people, situations and relationships we attract. People with this people can naturally attract a lot of eyes and attention -- good and bad. Due to pluto's contact - the planet of death, obsession, sex etc -- with the love planet venus, this can suggest attracting obsessive partners. This can manifest in both a negative, and positive way. This placement can absolutely attract their spouse, love of their life etc -- but they can just as easily attract lots of unwanted, creepy attention. Also, if you have this placement there's a good chance you were sexualized as a child, or much sooner than you should have been -- I am sorry 😞
1H Luminary placements: these placements get such a bad rep in astrology imo lol. While the first house is the house of the self, this does not suggest a person with sun/moon in 1H being extremely selfish (which pop astrology suggests). In my experience, people with these specific placements have them to learn what it means to find & live in your own truth. I find that people with these placements (sometimes venus 1H and Mercury 1H too) are very selfless and might actually neglect giving themselves the energy of the planet in their first house. For example, to the outside world, a Sun in 1H person might seem confident, extroverted even (sometimes, the opposite is true) but on the inside, this person actually struggles with their identity and confidence a lot. they ask themselves who they are, who they want to be, as much as they think about breakfast. They can be too hard on themselves which can make them hyperfocus on themselves, their lives, their goals etc., -- but it is literally part of their life purpose to go through these cycles which to the outside world, looks like the person is being selfish. Same is said for Moon in 1H --these people are considered manipulative, secretive, very emotional -- but the truth is, they might have gone their whole lives holding onto emotions that were never allowed to be released. Perhaps this individuals pushes their own feelings away to always make space for others. These people are extremely empathetic and while there will be a few rotten apples out there, the good majority of people with this placement are not awful emotionally selfish people, they are just here to learn how to honor, accept, and transmute their emotions just as often as they help others do the same.
Having lots of 3H, 6H, 10H placements usually makes a person really busy, or manifests as someone with anxiety especially anxiety that arises from the lack of work. These placements are the real workaholics but to an extreme level. I know someone with a 6H stellium & 10H Saturn who at one point worked 3 jobs and was a full-time uni. student. Same person is now a NICU nurse, actively getting two more masters degrees, so yeah, y'all like to keep busy. I have noticed these placements have big issues with time management, especially when it comes to any personal time you give yourself (do you even give yourself any time to wind down? like lets bfr 🙈). As a taurus moon I feel compelled to remind you that you literally need rest to accomplish all the things you want to do! What good is pushing past your limits if you feel exhausted constantly?
Jupiter in 4H -- I have a question, how was your childhood? I feel this placement can manifest in lots of ways, I feel for some of you maybe you had lots of siblings, more brother's than sisters. You could be the younger child. Jupiter is about expanding whatever it touches, so when its in the 4H it is essentially "growing" in that area. This could mean having lots of siblings, but in the same extreme, this could mean having none. The could have manifested in a happy, healthy home & family dynamic. This can just as well manifest as serious family trauma (generational trauma), or serious and repetitive familial themes and karmic cycles. You are here to learn something about balance in regards of the home, lineage, magic, traditions, wisdom, and love in general. Because Jupiter is in the 4H here, you will have a lot of opportunity to have luck in terms of buying a home, relocating, or in general "leveling up" in a secure way. But jupiter does not give just to give... if you want the blessings of jupiter you can't be stagnant -- this is something else jupiter in 4H seems to struggle with. I've noticed y'all can get lazy 😭 If you grew up in a happy home (hell or not) and had a parent (s) figure do everything for you, then the time you hit adulthood will be a rude awakening. Same is said for those with overbearing or controlling parents with this placement. Remember that jupiter is not just about luck, its mostly about expansion, so having things go your way, or having a support system that fails to teach you how to be independent will make things difficult for you when you have to be. Using Jupiter in 4H energy to your benefit looks like breaking generational curses, ending self-destructive patterns, watching negative habits such as alcoholism, drug abuse, and gambling, and in general, actively making better choices.
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thefirsthogokage · 11 months
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Very helpful thread made for those walking the picket lines by an EMT in Florida:
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(screen shots from here on out. Too many images to put in one post. Sorry for the dark mode switch ahead of time)
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[Image ID: a tweet thread made by @TheMaryGirls on July 18th, 2023 that reads in its entirety (though combined where appropriate and tweet numbers removed for condensing):
This is for the strikers everywhere since I'm nowhere near a picket line. This is the least I can do:
I am an EMT in Florida, one of the hottest states in the country on a regular basis. These are things you can do to protect yourself from the heat
1. Water
Water is great, your body needs it to live. You can go longer without food than you can without water. It's vital. If you become too dehydrated you can lapse into something called Hypovolemic shock which is the most dangerous form of shock because, usually, by the time you realize something is wrong, you're already in a bad position.
When you sweat, you're not just losing water. You're also losing salt, potassium, chloride, magnesium, & calcium. To combat this, you should drink something with electrolytes.
You can also eat a banana in order to avoid cramping that can occur with the loss of potassium. You don't want to be the one doing the Charley Horse Hustle on the line when people have phone cameras. You can also eat fruit and veg with high water content. They helps.
A word of caution about ice water. I know the idea of a big bottle of ice water sounds great when you're sweating your balls off on the line but NO! That can be dangerous. Your body temperature is up due to the heat. You chug a bottle of ice water like you used to do with Smirnoff Ice in college, you'll regret it. Ice water will cause your body temperature to drop which fraks up your homeostasis. You can experience stomach craps, fainting, and, on some weird occasions, cardiac arrest. Face planting on the pavement isn't cute.
One way you CAN use ice water safely is by soaking a t-shirt or towel and putting it on your head to help cool you off. Also, cold rags around the wrists can also cool you down. You've seen construction workers with the t-shirts on their heads? This is why.
2. Whole body
If you get blisters on your feet, you need to treat them. Also, don't force pop them, you're just asking for trouble. When they rupture, they need to be cleaned with soap and water (no alcohol or peroxide) and protected. Band-Aids won't really help here.
Band-Aids can easily slip off and give bacteria a chance to move in and really get gross. Liquid bandage is the better option. It's waterproof but it does sting when you put it on so be warned.
If you experience muscle cramps on the line, you need to deal with them. This is your bodies way of telling you something is wrong. Sit down, drink something. Stretching before picketing can also help prevent them. Let's be honest, as writers, we sit. A LOT.
Going from a cave dwelling hermit to bright sunlight and exercise is going to piss your entire system off. Icy Hot and hot baths will be your friend.
3. Dehydration warning signs.
Muscle cramps
light headed
headaches
feeling very thirsty
dark urine
urinating less often
feeling tired
dry mouth, lips, or tongue
skin tenting
confusion
That's all that I can think of at the moment.
GO FUCK EM UP!!!!!!!
/End ID]
Bonus:
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[Image ID: Tweeted comment on the thread from @/sardoniccomment that reads:
Every word of this is good advice, but, as a former desert-dweller, there’s something I need to add: dehydration makes you stupid. It can literally prevent you from being able to figure out the source of your problems is dehydration.
/End ID]
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latteandjacks · 3 months
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SPOILERS WOOP AKA ME OVERANALASYING, AS USUAL
THIS
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THIS SCENE
WAS REALLY FUCKED UP LIKE WTF PELO HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME FEEL THINGS
It's just the fact that Moloch is using them against Father Gregor, Michelle had already talked to him and left clear how much she missed her son, how he seemed to be only thing she had left apart from her cats and how religion was her last hope for him to be saved, he said he would do whatever he could and not long after that he is meet with THIS
He saw Dexter asking for his mother, to add salt to the wound, he's asking it like a scared kid, after Gregor has been dealing with Skid and Pump all day who left clear that they have absent parents, this hit him hard, even if he knows it's not real, because it also confirms to him that he and his mother (likely) are dead
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Dexter was,,, I mean he wasn't normal, after all he had the need to kill, but what I find interesting and sad is that he is trying so hard to control it, he got into a job where he can kill small animals in a morally accepted way, he also helped her mother take care of the cats (Tho I kind of believe the sick cat did not come back, but helped her anyway) and seemed to live with her or at least spend a lot of time with her Going back to Deadly Smiles, he tried to control it, he didn't wanted to kill the kids until he couldn't take it anymore and just decided to do whatever it took to fulfill his needs, but other than that, he lived a normalish life, he tried to, and he would've probably managed to keep with it if it wasn't for Moloch
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Oh and also HE. IS. NOT. DEAD. THE UNIVERSE DOES NOT LET HIM DIE, HE KEEPS COMING BACK, FUCKING AFTON STYLE
This leads me to believe there's more about Dexter for the next episodes and holy shit, am I looking forward to see it
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He's really a tragic character, I love him so much, sorry not sorry I am now a Dexter apologist, my boy did nothing wrong
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