#(The best/worst/most likely case is from that one post
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trentcrimminallybeautiful · 2 months ago
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GERT!! how do we feel about season 4?
EXTREMELY ANXIOUS !!!
#s4 anxiety#WHAT IF THEY MASSACRE MY BOY.#WHAT IF THEY VANISH MY BOY.#WHAT IF THEY DO SOMETHING TO HIM !!!!#not just him either#like listen everyones going 'STOP BEING SO NEGATIVE AND BE HAPPY' so i dont wanna make a big deal of it or anything#but like IM ANXIOUS MAN!!!!#after some of the uhhh choices made in s3 im just like. MANNN#again not ragging on anyone else being excited but MAN im anxious#askbox#gertspeak#like idk man. best case it goes great and we get new characters#that are awesome and not mishandled at all and the old characters are great and janebeard get divorced#....and maybe trent and ted kiss idk /hj#worst case everything goes horrible and the whole world's in flames and trent's evil and my notps all kiss and they kill someone onscreen#most likely case evreything just keeps going and some things are worse and some things are better but mostly its more of the same#but im just. maybe overall a little unhappier with the show#but it could be something totally different! who knows!#(The best/worst/most likely case is from that one post#i do not think best or worst is gonna happen the point is they are extreme)#idk. tdlr: IM ANXIOUS#cant decide if i want trent to not show up at all so they cant mess him up#or if i desperately want him to be there even if im risking like. idk. bad stuff you know#i stg if they do a canonically unrequited tedtrent plotline im gonna kill someone#either dont mention it at all or do tedependent#the second one isnt gonna happen so like. just. let it be as its been. implications. we do NOT need another#'our straight protag is so sexy and likable and wonderful that the gay man is tragically in love with him but it's unrequited ofc' plot#my feelings on that are more complex than just that but . NOT THE POINT OK#YOU GET THE IDEA. ANXIOUS
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savage-rhi · 6 months ago
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🫂
#i've had many people ask me in the DMs what could be done to help me out given the orange menace is coming back into power#the best things for me right now (I can't speak to others) is this: 1. Keep supporting my creative endeavors#no matter how little I might post or interact. Please hype me up. I need community. I need spirit to survive.#2. Help me find resources that will help myself and others. Food banks. Community meets. Passports. Finances. Mental health etc.#these are important and I don't want others feeling like sitting ducks. Even though I'm scared I want to be a solution to the problem.#I am going to be a helper in this mess cause that's who I am and I need ammo in this capacity#3. Donate so I can up my ration storage. I've been collecting food water and nonperishables and I'm trying to stock up on medication#and other basic necessities. I'm collecting as if I'm preparing to be homeless again and if I am over capacity I'm giving rations to others#I've had to make peace with the fact I can't run away. I can't move to another country as I'm broke and poor like the rest of my loved ones#4. If you have friends who are disabled or a minority or lgbtq etc. do what you can to protect them and show them that you love them#and build community#5. Share my work and that of others. Who knows if we're gonna have sites like AO3 in the future or even access to tumblr.#this is all I can think of at the moment and again I can't speak for others this is what comes to mind for myself#And I admit I'm coming from a place of the worst case scenarios#because in my mind if I imagine I'm dead or homeless etc. and work my way backward to the next worst thing before that it unravels my fear#and it gives me back my power in the situation by sitting with those fears and giving them time to speak#because in my mind if I'm already dead if I'm already homeless or at war etc. etc. then its already happened and what else is there to fear#if I've been through everything already in mind?#I'm hoping that the worst case scenarios don't transpire but I can't ignore the fact many of them could and probably will happen#in some capacity but I can control the actions I take through prep and facing these fears one by one#and most importantly sticking to routine by making sure im healthy to help people#anyway this is why ive been quiet for a while besides for spending time with friends and loved ones recently to get over what happened#im going to keep going to my classes keep helping people through my jobs try to be creative when I have spoons and little by little#make sure I have enough of what I need to get through the storm and outlive the bastards in power#I'm not sure what sort of pink variant to assign this to but its along the magenta spectrum#love you guys#we'll get through this
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hsslilly-blog · 7 months ago
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#huntclaire#i was going to reblog this from the source but i didn't want to ramble in their mentions. this will be long#i've been thinking about this post for some days now and i couldn't write why it fit huntclaire so well but i think i can now#i like huntclaire because i do believe they bring out the best of each other but mostly. they bring out the worst of each other#<- and i think that's good. for their (eventual) relationship and for their individual characters#i think before hunt and claire can have a relationship they need to engage with each other in a sincere way. and they do not do that.#they are incapable of that. they're both stuck in their ideas of themselves/each other that they are simply blind to the reality of things#they are both... extremely flawed human beings. as we all are. but they're too self-important to realise that. which is another flaw#hunt thinks His arrogance is a virtue (delusional). claire thinks she's humble (also delusional).#both are very fond of pointing flaws in other people while being unaware of their own. they cannot TALK with each other as long as they#think like this. hunt needs to get over himself and claire needs to know herself#i must make you aware of things you do not see. unsure if it's meant to be taken just in a positive sense but i'm user wesposting#it's good when your partner challenges your idea of things. and i think these are two individuals that need to be constantly challenged#hunt needs someone to tell him to his face that he's kind of a dick sometimes. and claire needs someone to point out the flaws in her logic#they need to be questioned challenged they need to stop and think about themselves. they need to be wrong. only then they can be sincere#they need to be wrong and wrong again and then again. conflict between them is what moves them forward as characters#most of all they annoy each other so much because they see so much of themselves in one another. but acknowledging that is uncomfortable#it's uncomfortable to know yourself through the other#claire's case is interesting because she feels a ucs. Need to make hunt like her. but she's terribly unaware of what makes her unlikeable#<- she's fallen for her own façade. she needs to stop and dig through her bugs.#alsolol i like how both of them are hypocritical. i think it's fun when characters have double standards. i think they suck. but i like the#anyway i must make you aware of the things you do not see. there's things about each other that they also do not see. at first#when they are sincere. when they. Talk. hunt learns claire is not That brash and she can be very insightful when she wants to. does she kno#that? and like i Guess hunt can be caring sometimes even if he's like totally annoying and weird about it. whatever. does he know that?#the artist sees good and bad. they must also see the good and the bad in each other. i think.
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compacflt · 2 years ago
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recalled today that the plural form of court-martial is “courtS-martial.” oh and it’s always hyphenated. utterly devastated
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spicymancer · 1 month ago
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Somethin I've noticed about your designs is that you've got a fair number of big boys (large, muscular, chunky etc.) but most of your female characters tend to stay pretty thin and lithe, with the biggest they get being kinda muscular.
Do you have any intention of adding some big girls to your cast?
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I have a few! Though you're right, the percentage disparity is pretty telling.
To be honest, it's absolutely a weakness of my character design sensibilities, and I'm doing my best to improve. I really should draw more varied body types.
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To look inward for a moment, I suspect that I'm experiencing a bit of a brain poison feedback loop. Drawing is, on one level, a leisure activity I do to have fun, and on another level a Job that do for Money. Both having fun and making money are important for surviving in the Capitalist Hellscape we all occupy.
When it comes to leisure, I obviously tend to draw inside of my comfort zone. I learned to draw by mimicking artists that I admired growing up and comic/manga art has historically not been great about body diversity. This then reinforces the feedback loop of mostly drawing one kind of face or body type. (in this case: cute anime girls) A common artistic bad-habit exemplified here in this Nozaki Kun comic.
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(Monthly Girls Nozaki Kun is incredibly good and a little too real)
Combined with the fact that being less practiced at drawing outside of my comfort zone, makes these designs end up taking more work to match the quality bar I have set for my work, this in turn means that it's more of a struggle to build up those muscles and bring those characters to the point where I'm happy with their design, which then makes that sort of drawing feel discouragingly like Work. Even if it's work that's worth doing (which it absolutely is)!
On the "monetary" side, I've built my audience on the characters I find easy to draw and so many of them expect/want me to draw more of that sort of thing. And having built an audience that desires that thing, they are often less engaged by things outside of that. Not to mention the economic strain of posts that do poorly will affect how much money I make in a given month.
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This isn't limited to "bigger women" but a lot of MxM stuff I draw tends to do poorly in my algorithm, discouraging me from drawing more of it even when I want to! This phenomena is probably worst for folks on Youtube who are DEEPLY punished by the algorithm for daring to make videos outside of their established niche. ("You're a videogame content creator, how DARE you have an opinion on BOOKS")
This is all to say that I am grateful for you reaching out and expressing interest in seeing more variety and it's a good reminder to expand my artistic horizons a little more. Nothing is for everybody and there's definitely sections of my lovely audience who are underserved by these absences.
For more thoughts on this sort of discussion: there's some excellent TBskyen posts on this subject.
In addition I'd like to shout out artists like @jam-etc and @lillhappycloud who draw incredibly fantastic and appealing bodies of all kinds!
I hope you'll bear with me as I work to improve while probably still drawing a lot of my Usual Stuff. I'll now leave you with a relevant Princess Bride Quote.
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Best Wishes.
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fatalhoon · 3 months ago
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caught in my web ! - sjy
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spiderman!jake x best friend!reader
wc ~6k
cw fluff!! swearing, one cum joke LOL, jake is a big nervous dork and reader is a little dumb lmaoo, i think that’s all!
an i wrote this and posted it on my sideblog for a different fandom but i thought it was cute so i wanted to redo it for jake a post it here too :>
—🕷️🕸️🕷️—
when he first discovered that such a simple and seemingly harmless spider bite had such irreversible effects on him, jake, to put it bluntly, was petrified.
even from the moment the spider bit him, for all he knew he could soon be literally petrified by the way the bite was making his arm feel weird already, and though he can’t say he’s necessarily well versed in arachnids, that was not a spider he’d ever seen before.
he knew most likely it was just paranoia, but his brain was swirling with worst case scenarios.
nonetheless, it was very late at night and a college student such as himself did not have the money nor the means for an emergency room visit, so he decided to attempt to sleep it off, and if it seemed to be worse in the morning he’d see what he could do.
well, maybe that’s an oversimplification of events.
he’d called you, practically hyperventilating and saying his goodbyes, scaring you shitless as well for a good minute before you’d finally pried out of him what had happened.
luckily, entomology was something you were actually studying, and you had enough knowledge of various spiders and the effects of certain venom that when you arrived at his apartment (for his own peace of mind and yours) you were able to calm him enough to the point that planning his own funeral was no longer at the forefront of his mind.
with the strange spider safely captured in a small jar (as afraid as he was, he couldn’t bring himself to kill it) he felt a little better even just from your calming presence.
(“jake, why did you put a piece of cheese in there?” “i wanted to be hospitable.” “..cheese.” “i don’t know what spiders eat!”)
you spent the night on his couch that night as well (he hadn’t asked, but you knew if you left he might start typing up a will) so you were able to keep an eye on him.
the next morning jake wakes up feeling fine, albeit a bit groggy. he flops out of bed, and he rubs the sleep from his eyes as he wanders across the hall to the bathroom.
grabbing his glasses and sliding them on, he looks down at the spot on his arm that he’d been scratching at to check it’s status.
but its.. blurry?
he blinks a few times to focus his vision, but nothing changes.
its not until his hand pushes his glasses up to rub at his face and he gets a view without a lens that he realizes that its actually his glasses that are the issue. he moves them out of the way, and to his shock he can see completely clearly without them.
he lifts them up to sit on his head, looking at himself in the mirror, absolutely dumbfounded.
“what.. the fuck?”
“jake?”
he jumps, banging his knee on the counter.
“jesus! sorry,” you chuckle, hands up. “not a spider!”
“har har,” jake mocks, massaging his leg, a cute pout on his face.
you step into the bathroom, reaching up to adjust his glasses that had fallen from the crown of his head to the tip of his nose. he squints, rubbing at his temple.
“you.. okay?” you venture, watching him blink hard a few times.
“yeah! uh-“ more blinks, eyes wide- “i’m good.” a fake smile. its your turn to squint, not quite believing him.
you see him instinctively clenching his fist, shaking out his arm a little. you grab it and drag him forward a little to examine the splotch on his forearm.
“mm.” you hum. you brush your fingers along the bump, making a shiver roll up jake’s spine. he watches you over the rim of his glasses.
“its a little red, but it looks okay. i don’t think it was poisonous.”
“great! uh- cool, that’s good news,” jake bumbles, an awkward smile on his face.
he stares at you.
you stare at him.
your face is blurry.
he adjusts his glasses.
“right..”
he gulps.
“well. i have a lecture soon, so i should get going.” you give his arm a little pat and release it from your fingers. he nods, scratching at it absentmindedly again.
“still on for movie night later?”
jake answers without thinking through it.
“of course.” shit.
you grin at him. “great.” shit shit shit.
but the twinkle in your eyes and the way your fingers ruffle through his messy hair makes his heart flutter less with anxiety and more with something.. warmer.
you turn and round the hallway corner and jake lets out a tense breath he didn’t know he was holding. he knocks into a small table from his lack of clear sight as he follows you, and swiftly blames it on lack of sleep when you quirk a brow at him.
a minute later you’ve gathered your things from the living room, the bottled spider included to take to your class to be studied, and give him a wave as you walk out his front door.
“see you tonight, spider man.”
jake takes off his glasses once the door is closed behind you, sighing heavily and rubbing a hand down the side of his face. he swipes his thumb across his forearm, your touch lingering in his mind.
“spider man.” he scoffs, but he can’t help the fond smile that turns up his lips.
—🕷️🕸️🕷️—
“where are your glasses?”
“i got contacts.” jake lies through his teeth.
“today?” you question incredulously.
“… yeah.”
you clearly don’t believe him, if the way your brow furrows is anything to go by. you’d seen him just a few hours ago.
“is it because i always call you a nerd? you know i mean that affectionately, right?” jake hears the hint of guilt in your voice and panics.
“no! yeah i uh, i do- i just-“ he trails off. he isn’t sure where else to go with this. you catch the awkwardness, watching as he scratches the back of his neck, and decide to let it go before he starts sweating.
“well, if you can’t see the screen don’t ask me what happened,” you joke, lightening the mood to jake’s relief. you set down the snacks you brought and plop down on the couch, propping your feet on the coffee table, remote in hand.
jake relaxes in his spot next to you, ripping open a bag of chips. “you’d probably be asleep even if i did.” you roll your eyes and smack his arm. jake lets out a laugh.
fourty five minutes later, jake does have to ask a question about the movie you’re watching (but not because he couldn’t see, he’s just been daydreaming for most of it.)
and lo and behold, you are asleep, so he’s left to wonder.
jake starts to reach for his soda on the table in front of him, but you, wrapped around his right arm and sleeping comfortably, tighten your grip when you feel him start to move.
he moves just the left side of his body forward, ever so slowly, wiggling his fingers as he strains to grab his drink without disturbing you.
but suddenly, something knocks into the can, denting the side and sending it falling over with a tinny clank against the wood. liquid spills from the opening and dribbles over the side and onto the floor.
“how the-“
“shhh,”
he freezes, looking down at you. you pull him back again, nuzzling your face into his shoulder. your cheek presses up against his sleeve, smushing up your face and jakes’s heart almost explodes. he reaches up gently, pushing a tuft of hair away from your face, and you hum happily.
jake thinks for a second that maybe a stain on his carpet is worth it if he can stay like this forever.
something stuck to his wrist catches his attention.
its a strand of web.
jake yelps before he can catch himself, frantically flicking his arm to detach it and startles you fully awake in the process. you let out a similar yelp in practically the same octave as his was, jumping up and clutching tighter onto his bicep.
“what!! what happened?” you squeak.
he doesn’t answer, just continues his task of brushing off every square inch of his body to rid himself of any potential dangers. when he deems himself safe, he looks over at you, and is met with crossed arms and a disgruntled look.
“sorry! sorry,” jake huffs apologetically. he clears his throat, his face flushing red from embarrassment as he explains, “spider web.”
you chuckle incredulously, rubbing your eyes and letting out a yawn. “spider web,” you giggle through a playful smirk. you stand, stretching your limbs, and hobble in the direction the bathroom.
“try not to die out here without me, alright?” you quip as turn the corner.
jake groans. he gets up himself to grab a towel from the kitchen, coming back to crouch down and sop up the mess still dripping from the table.
he picks up the can and tries to set it back on the table top, but it sticks to his hand. even when he uncurls all five fingers from it, its still stuck snugly to his palm. he uses his other hand to grab it and pry it away, and it detaches with a sticky snap, leaving multiple strands of web connecting his skin to the tin.
“jesus christ,” he gripes, watching the web strands flutter under his breath.
“oh, there really was a spider web,” it’s jake’s turn to startle, jumping a bit as he sees you crouched down right beside him, observing the wiggly webs.
jake gives you an indignant look, one that reads ‘did you think i was lying?’
“honestly i just though you were being paranoid.” jake rolls his eyes, nudging you with his shoulder.
“sorry! not my fault you’re a scaredy cat!”
“i am not!” he defends, pressing the towel further down into the carpet plush.
you glide your fingers up the back of jake’s neck in a gentle tickle, and right on cue he lets out a little ‘eek!’, slapping your hand away. he pushes you softly and you giggle, falling back from your crouched stance on your toes and onto your butt. you hug your legs, resting your chin on your knee as you watch him continue to dry up the mess.
“they probably just like you. i know i do.” you drop a little hint at the end. he never seems to catch on.
“they can like me all they want, just far away from me please.” he grumbles, taking the can to the kitchen to toss it in the trash.
“spiders are friends!~” he hears you sing from the other room.
he drops the can into the bin, hoping this is the last of his spider related worries.
—🕷️🕸️🕷️—
jake never thought he would ever be friends with spiders. let alone be one.
it took him a while to realize that the spider bite had caused him more trouble than just a slight fear of the nooks and crannies of his apartment. much more trouble.
he discovered that it was him creating the webs he was finding around when he dropped his pen once while writing out some notes for a class, and when he tried to grab it before it hit the ground, he’d caught it with a collection of web strands that shot out of his wrist instead.
he discovered how strong his webs were when he tripped on the staircase while running late one day, spurting out a web that stuck to the wall and caught him, and tugged him upright before he hit the ground.
and he discovered how useful this strange new talent could be outside your apartment.
“so, any news about that spider? you brought it in to study it, right?” jake asks as nonchalantly as he possibly can, walking down the concrete steps beside you.
“oh, actually yes! we think it might be a-“
suddenly a hooded figure runs by, snatching your backpack from right off your shoulders, and sprinting down the sidewalk through a dense crowd of pedestrians.
the stranger nearly knocked you to the ground with the push-and-shove of stealing your belongings. jake caught you, steadied you on your feet, and booked it after him without even thinking twice, leaving your confused cries to stop behind him.
his speed and reflexes seemed to be heightened as he caught up in a few seconds flat, and in a fraction of that time he had a web wrapped around the strap of your bag, pulling it directly into his chest to wrap his arms around, and a leg out to sweep the thief’s legs straight out from under him, sending him face first into the pavement.
jake stands motionless for a second, energy rushing through his veins, and waits for his brain to process what had just happened. when it does, it feels like he’d just returned to his own body from somewhere completely different.
you caught up to jake after a moment, heaving heavily from your tired lungs. your eyes widen at the scene in front of you; a completely unscathed jake and a nearly unconscious criminal bleeding from the nose below.
“how did-“ you struggle for a full breath. “how did you do that?”
“uhm- adrenaline, i think?” honestly, jake isn’t quite sure how he did this either.
“jake, you could have gotten hurt!” you scold him, trying your best to sound steady and serious, but by the way your hands tremble it tells him you were more worried for his safety than anything else.
“i wasn’t gonna stand there and do nothing,” he says like its the most obvious thing in the world. he settles your bag back on your shoulders, looping your arms through the straps for you and adjusting the fabric of your sleeves. your eyes gloss over and you’re gnawing at your lip like you’re trying your best not to cry.
“your laptop is expensive. we can’t have you lose that,” he jokes, attempting to lighten the mood.
you let out a trembling laugh, and yank him in to hug him with a full crushing force. “you’re such an idiot,” you whine, and he returns the hug with a chuckle of his own.
jake isn’t sure how he did this or what exactly is going on, but what he is sure about is that whatever is happening to him, using it to protect you will always be his first priority.
—🕸️🕷️🕸️—
the idea to become a “hero” of sorts struck jake one day like a bolt of lightning.
the notion sounds absolutely crazy, jake knows that, but the circumstances have fallen directly into his lap, and he knows that if he has the ability, the real ability to protect people, he should take it.
he practices his web slinging in private, and he’s gotten quite good at it; he now can do it on command instead of at random, and can control it when he needs to.
(and yes, he’s made all of the jokes, even if he’s the only person around to laugh. he can shoot sticky white goo from his wrists, did you expect him not to be a little silly with it?)
he practices his dexterity in the air out in an old alley that no one has any reason to frequent. in doing so, his muscles have bulked up significantly, and he was flustered beyond belief when you of all people were the one the pointed it out.
he told himself that if he was going to be this new face of justice, he should protect his identity and keep it separate from his personal life. he didn’t want anyone he knew and loved getting involved; if someone got hurt because of him he wouldn’t be able to bare it.
so he made a few suit prototypes from old clothes and acrylic paint. he may not be the craftiest, but he made do, and he learned some sewing basics in the process, though you really wouldn’t be able to tell. (in the end he commissioned someone to make one for him anyway, for the sake of quality.)
the last thing he really needed came to him after he’d successfully helped a woman with an issue involving a man following her down the street late one night. after making sure the woman was safe enough to leave, he attaches his web to a fire escape and is about to swing away.
“what do i call you?” she yells out from below him as he hangs from the rail.
he thinks for a second. web boy? no, that’s dumb. arachnid kid? a little silly, he likes that it rhymes, but it still doesn’t feel right.
and then it hits him.
“spiderman.”
he swings away, and within the next few weeks, ‘spiderman’ is everything that people are talking about.
you included.
“have you seen him?” you ask him excitedly, rocking back and forth on your heels as you both stand in line at your favorite ice cream shop. “he’s so cool!”
he chuckles a little. “i’ve heard of him.” a blush creeps up on his face he hopes you don’t see, but you’re too excited to even notice. “cool, huh?”
“so cool!” you thank the worker for your milkshakes and leave the small shop, the bell above the door jingling as you step outside. “i want to talk to him so bad, i bet he’s so interesting, and he’s probably so cute under the mask,” you daydream out loud as you walk down the sidewalk.
jake coughs a bit in surprise. “what makes you think that?”
“don’t be jealous,” you poke, a smirk on your face. “just a hunch.”
in a split second you’re suddenly yanked to the edge of the sidewalk by jake as you’re about to step onto the crosswalk. before you can comprehend why, someone comes barreling through on a bicycle, shouting a faint ‘sorry!’ as they whiz by, the wind fluttering your hair. your milkshake slips from your fingers, a small gasp leaving your lips, and jake grabs it before it can splatter across the ground, placing it back in your hand for you.
“you okay?” he asks, brushing off your jacket. you don’t answer, still staring off in the direction the bike went in shock. as soon as everything catches up to you, you look at him, eyes wide. “that was insane! when did you get such crazy reflexes?”
“what do you mean?” jake sweats a little. “didn’t you hear him coming?”
you shake your head. “no that’s not it, you did that so fast, and my drink-“
“i think- i think you were just caught off guard,” he excuses, ushering you forward to keep walking.
“so um. you were talking about spiderman?”
—🕷️🕸️🕷️—
and talk about spiderman you did.
specifically, you talk about how you would love to meet him, to speak to him.
so, who would jake be to keep that from you when he is the one you want to meet?
well unfortunately, it wasn’t his choice.
(how was he supposed to go about that? knock on your door and say “hello random citizen, i’m spiderman! your best friend jake who i totally don’t know and definitely am not the same person as said you wanted to talk to me”?)
no, in reality, it was a total accident.
he finds himself crash landing onto the roof of your apartment building after a particularly brutal fight he’d gotten himself tied up in, his fatigue and pain not letting him swing any longer to make it all the way back home. he groans loudly, cradling his leg in his arms as he lays on the cold roof in the fetal position.
“spiderman??”
fuck. he knows that voice.
he lifts his head up in the direction it came from, seeing your head pop up over the ledge of the building. before he can say anything, you scramble up from the fire escape and run over to his side.
‘great,’ jake thinks. this is the second worst byproduct of you having a top floor apartment. (he still remembers how sore he was after having to help you drag your mattress up several flights of stairs when you moved in.)
“are you okay?”
“i’m fine, i’m good, i just-“ he attempts to stand on his own, but groans again, and crumples under his own weight. its your turn to catch him before he falls.
“oh god, um, i can help! just- here-“ you sling his arm around your shoulder and huddle into his side, and you help him hobble to the edge. he clambers down the fire escape, using his webs to keep him relatively stable, and fumbles through the window and onto the floor of your apartment. he hits the floor with a thud and a moan.
“sorry! um, i’ll get my first aid kit! i’ll be back!”
you leave and come back in a blind hurry, making quick work of rolling up the torn part of his suit to get a clear enough view of the gash in his leg to start your process. it hurts at first, a lot actually, but the pain subsides not long after. maybe because its you doing it, and he trusts you more than anyone, but he feels so much love and care in your movements.
he lets you focus in quiet for a while before he finally decides to say something.
“for someone who studies bugs and not medicine, you’re pretty good at that.”
you raise your eyebrows at him, wrapping a bandage around his calf. “how do you know i study bugs?”
shit. “just a hunch.”
you glance at him, not convinced.
“the pinned butterflies on your wall.”
“ah,” you say, nodding.
whew.
“maybe i just like butterflies.”
“that could be it too.” he chuckles under the mask. “i mean they’re pretty. like you. so it makes sense.”
you blush, a smile tugging at your lips. “smooth.”
“thanks, i know,” jake drawls, leaning to suavely rest on his elbow next to him, and hits his head on a table. “ow.” you both laugh.
when you finally get him patched up, he thanks you (he almost leans in for a hug on accident, but settles for a firm handshake instead) and climbs over the windowsill in preparation to take his leave.
“hey, can i ask you something?”
jake’s heart pounds. “sure.”
“can you.. come back sometime?” you twist your fingers nervously as you ask, avoiding his eyes. “i always wanted to talk to you but, this wasn’t really.. under the best circumstances, i guess.”
jake’s brain doesnt know if he should say yes, but his heart knows he could never say no to you, spiderman or otherwise.
“of course.” your smile makes it worth it.
he slings a web up onto a bar of the fire escape and flings himself out.
“wait!”
he turns back, glancing back down at you leaning out the windowsill, the chilled wind fluttering your hair.
“i don’t just like butterflies. i like spiders, too.”
jake grins.
“i didn’t used to like spiders. but i think they’re growing on me.”
and with that, he swings away.
—🕸️🕷️🕸️—
despite his better judgement, jake does come back. more than once.
he knows he shouldn’t appear as spiderman in front of you more than he needs to, but it just makes you so happy, it was physically impossible for him not to when he knows he’s the reason for your smile every time.
he sits with you now on the roof of your apartment, the same place you found him the first time, and the same place you two always meet now.
“-and that’s the story of how i met my best friend jake.” you finish your story, face flushed from laughing, and he’s forever grateful you can’t see his face under his mask. if he’s being honest (having lived through that torture with you) you actually told it way less embarrassing than he remembers it being. whether you perceive it less humiliating than he does or if you’re just gracious enough not to go into detail with strangers he’s not sure, but he’s thankful nonetheless.
“seems like you really care about him.”
“jake?” you ask, leaning back to rest on the heels of your hands. “well, yeah. he’s my favorite person in the whole world. don’t you feel that way about your best friend, too?”
jake feels his face heat up. “yeah, um. you pretty much took the words right out of my mouth.”
“yeah? tell me about them. what’s their name?”
“hey, whoa” jake lifts his hands in defense. “ask me about my favorite ninja turtle all day, but i can’t be giving out my best friend’s identity. why do you think i wear the mask?”
you laugh, nodding in understanding. “okay, okay, fair.”
a comfortable silence falls for a moment, and jake watches you gaze at the stars above the city lights.
“you remind me of him, you know.”
“huh?” jake snaps back into the present.
“jake. you guys seem really similar, honestly. same mannerisms, same cologne-“ you know the smell of his cologne? “you say things sometimes that i definitely think he would say. same favorite ninja turtle, too.”
he never really realized you paid this much attention to him. his heart flutters.
“ehh, i don’t know. guy sounds like a total nerd.”
you snort out a laugh. “oh he is,” ouch?? “but he’s my nerd. i love him just how he is. i wouldn’t change a single thing about him.”
“.. you love him?”
another silence. this one a little more.. tense.
“i love all my friends, but jake is.. different.”
“different how?”
“i’m not in love with my other friends.”
jake’s brain nearly short circuits right then and there. how he gets a single comprehensible sentence out of his mouth after that is honestly beyond him. but he’s not jake right now, he’s spiderman.
“i’m in love with my best friend too.”
“really?” you look at him, a sense of hope in your eyes, like you just found the only other person in the world in the same position as you. if you only knew.
“this,” he motions to his suit, and in turn the whole act of being spiderman at all. “its for them. i help everyone i can, of course, but,” he seems to be lost in thought for a second, drumming his fingers on his knee. “like you said, they’re different. i’d do anything for them. anything at all.”
you tilt your head at him. “wow, who knew a superhero could be so sappy.”
“yeah, yeah,” he waves his hand dismissively. “my bad, gotta protect my stone cold image.” you huff out a laugh.
“have you told them?”
“no.”
“why?”
“same reason as you, i’m guessing.”
“fear?”
“fear.”
a knowing look is passed between you.
“my best friend doesn’t actually know i’m spiderman.”
“wait really?” you ask, surprised. “why not?”
“how am i supposed to tell them that? ‘hey by the way i’m risking my life every day for you!’ that seems like a horrible conversation.”
you chuckle. “yeah, i get that. i suppose its similar to the reason you haven’t confessed. the fear of rejection is present either way.”
“exactly,” he sighs.
after a second, a light bulb seems to come on above your head. “hey, i’ve got an idea. you tell your best friend you’re spiderman, and i’ll tell my best friend i’m in love with him.”
“that’s a terrible idea,” jake admits through a chuckle.
“is it?” you feign indignant. “if they love us, they’ll accept us, right?”
jake thinks it over for a second, his heart racing so fast he hopes you can’t hear it.
“okay. deal.”
you grin. “perfect.”
how the hell is he gonna do that?
“jake should actually be on his way, i’ll call him to make sure.”
shit. shit. he forgot about movie night.
you pull out your phone, tapping quickly to find his contact and press your phone to your ear. jake panics, pulling his phone from his suit just as it starts to ring, and presses end as soon as he can reach the button.
you give him a puzzled look, and he huffs nervously. “sorry, scam calls.” he shoves his phone into his suit before you can see it.
“hm. it went straight to voicemail. that’s odd,” you muse, glancing at the ‘call ended’ screen.
“maybe he’s driving. yknow, gotta stay safe,” he bumbles, nerves flooding his system as he stands up and dusts off the back of his legs. “hey listen, its been great, but i just remembered i have to go-“
“wait, wait!” you jump up as well, grabbing onto his gloved hand. “can you stay for just a minute? i think jake would really love to meet you!”
“i really uh- its- its important- i should-“
“it’ll just be a second! i promise! don’t move!” you plead. you give his hand a squeeze, and before jake can stop you, you hop down the fire escape and scurry back into your apartment.
—🕷️🕸️🕷️—
jake is fucked. absolutely fucked.
as soon as he sees you disappear into your apartment to wait for, well, him, he slings himself down to an alley to ‘jake’ himself up.
luckily, he has spare clothes stored across the city in case of emergencies like this. he stuffs his hand through a hole in the bricks of an abandoned building and pulls out a backpack, and as quickly as he possibly can, he pulls his clothes on over his suit, shoves his mask in and zips it up. he ruffles his messy hair in an attempt to seem a more presentable type of messy, and sprints out into the street.
now trekking up the stairs toward your apartment door, he thinks there wasn’t even really a logical reason to do this. he could have just told you right then that it was him, but something inside him told him that wasn’t the right time or place.
stopping in front of your door, he prepares himself, catching his breath before he knocks.
you swing it open immediately, a huge smile on your face.
“jake! i have something to show- why are you so sweaty?”
“i uh- i was running late so i ran.” he fumbles for an excuse. he walks in and is about to kick off his shoes when you grab his arm, dragging him across the living room to your window.
“come with me first! i have something to show you!” you say, brimming with excitement.
“hold on- i need to-“
“hurry!” you squeal, and hop out the window to climb the ladder. jake internally groans, following after you.
he grabs the rungs and hoists himself up behind you. “can i tell you something first?” he calls upwards. “its important!”
“this is important too! he has to be somewhere!”
oh, so now you listen to that information.
when his head pops up above the ladder to see the expanse of the rooftop, you’re already looking around, confused.
“where did he-“
“why are we up here?”
“i’m looking for someone! he said he would stay for a second,” you whine.
he never actually agreed to that, but he’ll let it slide.
you grip the barrier of the roof and pull yourself up to stand on the ledge, putting your arms out to steady yourself as you survey the area.
“what are you doing!” jake shouts, running up to you and grabbing your waist to prevent you from falling. “you have terrible balance!”
“relax, i’m fine. maybe if i fall he’ll come back to swoop in and save me.”
and as if the universe took that as some sort of sick challenge, a huge gust of wind blows through, knocking your balance off. you tilt forward with a strained yelp, flailing your arms. jake tries to grip your belt loops but they slip from his fingers, and he lets out an exasperated yell.
bracing yourself for a horrendous fall, you let out a scream, squeezing your eyes shut.
but it never comes.
you’re suspended in the air, but there’s no rushing air, no sinking feeling in your gut, everything just.. stopped.
you pop an eye open, met with the rough red texture of the brick in front of you. you follow your arm that’s outstretched above you upward, expecting somehow to see jake’s grip wrapped around your wrist, but instead you see a bracelet of weaved white. you lock eyes with him, a terribly worried expression on his face, the same white around your wrist attached to the underside of his.
for the first time, it all clicks together.
the webs in his apartment. the way they have the same voice, same habits. the way the spider on the suit is jake’s favorite color. his change in demeanor these past few weeks. jake having a limp from the same leg spiderman had injured around the same time.
it all finally makes sense.
“you-.. you’re-..”
“surprise,” jake whispers, a small, guilty smile on his face.
“can you. pull me up, please?” you tremble.
“oh! yeah, sorry.” jake brings you in with ease, grabbing firmly onto your body until you’re sat on your knees on the safety of the roof. you lunge forward, trapping jake in a bone crushing hug. he feels that you’re still shaking, and wraps himself around you with equal fervor, holding your head to his shoulder and stroking your hair to soothe you.
how could you have been so stupid? so clueless? you had every single piece of the puzzle, yet you were so blind to the placements.
it hits you then, that you had confessed to him without knowing it.
jake pulls you back and holds onto your shoulders, scanning you for any injuries. “are you okay?”
when he locks eyes with you, he sees how flustered you look, the blush on your face, and he has to bite back a smile.
“well, this is a little awkward,” he chuckles.
“you’re such an idiot,” you scoff, a common phrase nowadays it seems, but he hears no real weight in your words.
“i should have known. no ones favorite ninja turtle is leonardo except yours.”
“don’t bring my boy into this.”
“why didn’t you tell me?”
“well i think spiderman already explained that,” he says with a shit eating grin.
you roll your eyes. “yeah, he told me quite a bit, actually. some pretty gushy stuff.” jake whines nervously, scratching the back of his neck.
“big mouth on that guy, huh.”
“jake.”
“hm?”
“i have something to tell you.”
he smiles shyly. “yeah?”
you grab jake by the zipper of his jacket, pulling you together to connect your lips in a kiss. his hands immediately find your waist to pull you closer, practically falling on top of him. he tilts his head to kiss you deeper. you sigh happily in tandem.
after a second your hands find the sides of his face and you pull away, giggling at how you both can’t stop smiling and its making it hard to continue.
“i love you.”
“i love you, too.”
you run your thumb across his bottom lip, admiring the contours of his face and how his goofy grin and lidded eyes are so full of warmth.
“don’t you have something to confess to me, too?”
“i still don’t like spiders.”
“jake!” you push him back by the chest and he laughs, wrapping his arms completely around your torso.
he wiggles his fingers up your spine in a crawling motion, making you shiver and swat him away in a fit of giggles. he leans in close to your ear, and whispers-
“i’m spiderman.”
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solxamber · 3 months ago
Text
Signed, Sealed, Bonded || Jade Leech
Being an Esper is hard. Finding a Guide is harder. Somehow, the only one who can handle you is Jade Leech, who is both the best and worst thing that has ever happened to you.
or: Guideverse AU!
Series Masterlist
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So, picture this: You wake up, make yourself some coffee, look outside the window… and BAM—a glowing hell portal is vomiting out nightmare creatures like it’s Black Friday at the Underworld’s Walmart.
No big deal. Just another Tuesday.
This is life now. The universe is one big, unstable loot box, and sometimes, instead of daily struggles like taxes or existential dread, you get eldritch horrors trying to redecorate your city with human remains.
And that’s why Espers and Guides exist.
Espers are the special little guys (derogatory) with godlike powers and a tendency to explode if left unattended. They punch things, obliterate monsters, and generally keep civilization from crumbling like a stale cookie.
But Espers have one teeny, tiny problem. A small, insignificant, itsy-bitsy little flaw—
Espers have a fun little self-destruct feature where, if they overuse their powers and aren’t calmed down properly afterward, they go berserk and start turning cities into craters.
Whoops.
That’s where Guides come in—people with the power to keep Espers from self-destructing and turning the planet into a post-apocalyptic wasteland. They are the Espers’ emotional support humans. Their job is to keep Espers stable, sane, and not prone to going Godzilla-mode on a bad day.
Cool system, right? Makes sense? Keeps society from crumbling?
Yeah, except there’s a problem.
The problem is you.
You are the single strongest Esper on the planet. SSS-Class. Top of the charts. The kind of power that makes scientists scream and military generals start sweating through their uniforms. If Espers were trading cards, you’d be the one people would sell their kidneys for.
There’s just one little issue.
You… cannot be guided.
Like, at all.
Every time a top-ranking Guide tries to do their job, your body reacts like you just swallowed a fork.
S-Class Guide tries to guide you? You feel like you’ve swallowed a beehive.
A-Class Guide reaches out? Your skin crawls like you’re being haunted by the ghosts of bad life choices.
Government’s best, most elite SSS Guide gives it a shot? You feel like throwing up and committing a crime, but you can’t decide which one first.
Basically, your Esper powers took one look at every high-ranking Guide and said, “I’d rather die.”
The entire world is losing its shit over this.
The government is stressed. Scientists are conducting emergency research at 3 AM. High-ranking Guides are offended because how dare you reject their very expensive, very prestigious guidance?
Nobody knows why.
Is it a genetic anomaly? A cosmic joke? Are the gods simply looking down at you and laughing? Science is baffled. The government is stressed. At this point, your mere existence is a “can we patch this in the next update?” level of disaster.
You’re a walking nuclear reactor with no off-switch. And people are starting to panic.
And meanwhile, you’re just standing there, the world’s most unstable walking nuke, trying not to sneeze too hard in case you accidentally vaporize a small country.
It’s fine. It’s totally fine.
It’s absolutely not fine.
Because if they don’t find a Guide who can actually handle you soon…
You’re going to go berserk.
And when an SSS-Class Esper goes berserk? Well. You know those fantasy novels where an ancient dragon wakes up and annihilates an entire civilization in one breath? That, but worse.
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You had been this close to blacking out.
It wasn’t supposed to be this hard. You were an SSS-Class Esper, for crying out loud. You could sneeze and flatten a city block. But that Gate had been a nightmare, and without proper guidance, your body was losing its mind. Your veins felt like molten lava, your hands wouldn’t stop shaking, and your head was pounding with the kind of stress headache that could legally qualify as an assassination attempt.
So, like any responsible, law-abiding Esper who didn’t want to be put down like an unruly dog, you dragged yourself to the Guidance Center.
The moment you stepped inside, they immediately threw their best Guide at you—a fellow SSS-Class, the crème de la crème, the poster child of the entire system.
“Let’s begin,” they said, voice dripping with confidence, as if you weren’t already suffering. They reached out, their hands warm as they pressed against your skin.
And then.
Oh, God.
It hit you like a truck full of nausea and existential horror. Your stomach flipped so violently you actually gagged. Your muscles screamed in protest, every cell in your body rejecting the touch like a bad Tinder match.
You scrambled backward so fast you almost ate floor.
The SSS-Class Guide stood there, horrifically offended.
"Are you serious?" They demanded, arms crossed like a petulant child. "Again?"
You barely heard them over the sound of your own labored breathing because Wow. That had been unpleasant.
So now you were curled up on the floor of the Guidance Center, shaking from both overexertion and the delightful aftereffects of a guide touch that had made you want to throw yourself into oncoming traffic.
The SSS-Class Guide was still watching you, arms crossed, debating whether they should be more concerned about your wellbeing or their ego.
Which is exactly when Jade Leech walked in.
There was a pause.
Then a slow, deliberate click of polished shoes as he stepped toward you, tilting his head.
“…Are they supposed to look like that?” he mused aloud.
“No,” said the SSS-Class Guide, deeply unamused.
Jade hummed thoughtfully before crouching beside you, resting a hand on your shoulder. It wasn’t careful. It wasn’t hesitant.
And for the first time since your powers awakened, you didn’t want to fling yourself off a building.
Your whole body went limp.
The shaking stopped. The nausea faded.
Your mind, which had been screaming at a constant 200% volume since you turned eighteen and acquired your powers, went quiet.
It was the most blissful thing you had ever felt in your entire life.
The SSS-Class Guide was gaping at you like you had just committed high treason.
"Are you kidding me?" they spluttered. "Him?"
And then, with a huff, they stomped away, absolutely furious that you—the greatest Esper in history, the walking apocalypse—had rejected them but accepted some random nobody.
You, meanwhile, felt clear-headed for the first time in years.
You looked at Jade—at his unreadable expression, at the sharpness of his gaze.
And then you asked, voice hoarse but steady, "What’s your name?"
His lips curled into a polite smile. "Jade Leech."
"And your grade?"
He tilted his head slightly, as if entertained by the question.
“B-Class.”
Silence.
You stared at him.
Then, before you could stop yourself, you started laughing.
Of course this was happening. Of course the universe gave you a Guide you could accidentally kill.
What an absolute joke.
And yet…
You didn’t let go.
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Jade Leech was the key to your survival.
Not in the romantic, fated, "I would perish without you, my love," kind of way (you weren't that dramatic, despite what your coworkers said). No, this was purely a matter of self-preservation.
For years, you had been operating like a high-powered, government-issued, barely-functioning time bomb.
Every time you subdued a gate, your body veered dangerously close to going berserk, and the only thing keeping you from breaking reality into tiny, apocalyptic pieces was the occasional half-hearted guidance session that felt about as effective as slapping a band-aid on a leaking nuclear reactor.
It was not ideal.
But now?
Now you had Jade.
Jade, the B-Class Guide who had accidentally waltzed into your life, touched your shoulder, and immediately rewired your entire nervous system.
For the first time since awakening as an Esper, you had felt calm. Like your power wasn’t on the verge of ripping itself apart. Like your own body wasn’t actively rejecting the guidance meant to stabilize you.
And it was incredible.
So, being the responsible and absolutely not impulsive person that you were, you did the only logical thing.
You decided to bribe him with a gift and ask him to temporarily bind himself to you.
Look, it wasn’t permanent.
Permanent bonding was a whole different beast.
If you bonded with Jade permanently, that was it. Game over. No take-backs, no re-dos. No guiding anyone else for the rest of his life.
Espers could still receive guidance from others, sure. But Guides? They could never guide anyone else again.
Which—haha, wow,—that had never caused any problems, ever. Definitely not an entirely predictable storm of jealousy and possessiveness among Guides who suddenly couldn’t tolerate the idea of their Esper ever touching another person.
So, no. You were not going to ask him chain himself to you for eternity. That would be both cruel and incredibly selfish.
But a temporary bond?
A temporary bond would greatly reduce the risk of you accidentally draining him to the point of no return. It would give you the stability to actually push your limits without fear of self-destruction. And most importantly, it would allow both of you to thrive.
It was perfect.
Which was why, two days later, you found yourself standing at the entrance of the Guidance Center once again, clutching a neatly wrapped gift like it was a sacrificial offering.
You marched inside with the confidence of a person who had rehearsed this conversation in their head a thousand times.
And then promptly lost all of that confidence the second Jade turned to face you, smiling like he already knew exactly what you were about to say.
"Back so soon?" he asked, his voice perfectly polite. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
You cleared your throat and forced yourself to act like a normal human being.
“I wanted to thank you,” you said, shoving the box into his hands before you could second-guess yourself. “For the other day.”
Jade’s eyes flickered with something sharp and unreadable as he took the box, his fingers brushing lightly against yours.
Then, before your already struggling brain could catch up to the recklessness of what you were about to do, you pushed forward.
“I also had a proposal for you.”
Jade tilted his head, looking far too entertained.
“I see,” he said. “Do tell.”
You inhaled deeply.
"Would you be interested in forming a temporary bond with me?"
There. You said it.
Now, all you had to do was wait for him to either:
A) Refuse outright because it was too much effort.
B) Agree immediately because having the strongest Esper in existence on a leash would give him unfathomable influence.
What you did not expect was for him to smile.
Not a normal smile. Not a polite, professional, "oh wow, what a fascinating suggestion," kind of smile.
No.
This was something else.
A slow, deliberate, sharp-edged thing.
Jade stepped closer, gaze glinting with quiet amusement.
"And what," he murmured, voice too smooth, too knowing, "would you be willing to offer me in return?"
You blinked.
Oh.
Oh, you might be in deep shit.
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It had been weeks.
Weeks of asking Jade to temporarily bind himself to you. Weeks of bargaining, negotiating, and trying to convince him that this wasn’t some tragic, toxic love story where the frail Guide got used up like an expired battery. Weeks of him smiling at you like you were a particularly amusing lab rat scrambling against the walls of a maze.
And yet.
Despite all of that—he still guided you.
He still stepped in when your brain felt like it was melting from the inside out, still pressed a steady hand against your skin like it was the easiest thing in the world, still whispered, “Don’t fight it. Just relax.”
Which was a very funny thing to say to someone who could literally kill you by accident.
And that was the problem.
Because he wasn’t bound to you.
Which meant that if you drained him too much—if you accidentally pushed him past his limits—there would be no failsafe.
And if that happened—if you were even a fraction too reckless—
He would die.
And you would go to jail.
And, even worse, you would probably cry.
So, obviously, the rational thing to do was to pull away whenever you felt like you were taking too much.
Which brings you to now.
Jade had been guiding you for forty-five minutes.
FORTY-FIVE. MINUTES.
An ungodly amount of time. A suicidal amount of time.
You could already see the signs of fatigue in him. His touch had grown warmer, heavier, his breaths had slowed into something almost too steady.
He was getting tired.
Which meant it was time to get the hell out of here before you became a murderer.
You twisted, trying to sit up, and—like the absolute menace he was—Jade simply… swung his legs over yours, caging you beneath him like some deranged, smug, lanky cryptid that refused to let you escape.
You froze.
He smiled.
That sharp, infuriating, absolutely unhinged smile.
"Now, now," he murmured, voice sickeningly patient, "where do you think you're going?"
You stared at him in horror.
"You've been guiding me for almost an hour," you hissed, your muscles tense with the effort of not launching him across the room. "I refuse to let you die because you’re too stubborn to let me leave."
Jade tilted his head, considering.
"Hm."
You blinked.
"Hm"???
You had just laid out the possibility of a tragic demise and all he had to say was ‘hm’???
"What the hell does that mean?" you demanded.
Jade leaned in slightly, pressing his fingers against your neck, his touch featherlight.
"I wonder," he mused, eyes glinting with something that looked too much like amusement, "do you think perhaps you are underestimating me?"
"Underestimating you?" You nearly choked on your own disbelief. "Jade, you are a B-Class Guide. I could literally snap you in half like a goddamn glow stick."
"And yet," he said smoothly, "I am still here."
Your eye twitched.
"That is not the flex you think it is—"
"Shhh," he murmured, pressing his fingers against your temple. "Relax. Just a little longer."
You wanted to argue. You really, really did.
But the second his touch deepened the guiding, your entire body sagged under the weight of exhaustion.
You hated how much you trusted it.
You hated that, in the end, you let him win.
Because as much as you wanted to fight him, as much as you wanted to break free and flee the room—
You needed this.
And he knew it.
Which was why he was smiling so much.
The absolute menace.
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Today, you did something very dangerous.
No, not fighting another Gate. Not risking your life for the safety of others. Not even getting guided by a man who was one unfortunate sneeze away from becoming a tragic obituary.
No, you did something far worse.
You asked Jade Leech what he wanted in return for keeping you alive.
It was a reasonable question! A necessary question! Because at this point, the man was essentially your life support, and it felt a little irresponsible to just assume he’d be happy with some gift baskets and heartfelt thank-you notes. If you were going to keep depending on him, you needed to know what he wanted.
So you asked.
And the menace smiled.
Which immediately sent your self-preservation instincts screaming.
That was never a good sign. Jade’s smiles were like sharks in shallow water—unsettling, unnatural, and a clear warning that something was about to go very, very wrong.
You braced yourself.
And then he said:
"A nature trail."
You stared at him.
And blinked.
And then stared at him some more.
Because surely you had misheard him.
“A nature trail,” you repeated slowly, because there was no possible way that was all he wanted. You had prepared for blackmail. You had budgeted for bribes. Hell, you had been willing to break the bank if it meant keeping him around (not to brag, but the government paid you stupidly well for constantly risking your life). And yet, out of all the possible insane, ominous, power-hungry demands he could’ve made—
He was asking for a casual stroll through the wilderness?
Jade nodded, the picture of serenity. “Yes.”
"That’s it?" You squinted at him, like maybe if you looked hard enough, you’d find some hidden, sinister agenda buried in his expression. "That's all you want? Not money? Not status? Not, I don’t know, government secrets?"
Jade’s lips twitched, his amusement almost palpable. “For now.”
For now.
For now???
You triple checked that he was being serious, eyed him with the kind of deep, unblinking suspicion normally reserved for politicians and people who ate their cereal without milk, but all he did was nod serenely.
And so, finally, reluctantly, completely aware that you were probably walking into some elaborate trap—
You sighed and muttered, "Sure. What the hell."
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It was almost alarming how much fun you were having.
For once, you weren’t dealing with the constant, soul-crushing sensation of your own mind and body trying to rip each other apart like two rabid raccoons fighting over a single McDonald’s fry.
For once, you could just exist without the underlying fear of accidentally exploding something—or someone—if you weren’t careful.
And as it turned out, existing was kind of nice.
You took the time to smell the flowers (literally, because Jade had shoved one under your nose and said, “Tell me, do you also detect the faintest hint of decay?” which was an incredibly alarming sentence but a nice flower).
You watched as little woodland creatures scampered through the underbrush, entirely unbothered by the fact that an SSS-Class Esper and a B-Class Guide were just casually strolling through their home like a scenic couple in a nature documentary. And honestly?
It was peaceful. Disturbingly peaceful.
But the real sight—the real discovery—was Jade himself.
You had never seen him like this before. Completely in his element. He had dumped the entirety of your picnic basket into your arms without hesitation and was now roaming freely, examining plants with the intense curiosity of a man who had just found Atlantis.
Every few minutes, he’d pause and rattle off some absurdly specific nature fact at you, like, “This particular plant releases a toxin that causes temporary blindness if ingested. Isn’t that fascinating?” or “Did you know that otters sometimes use tools to crack open shellfish? Much like humans, they have a preference for certain objects. Some even carry the same rock with them for years.”
You had absolutely no idea why you found this so entertaining.
Maybe it was the way he spoke, all smooth enthusiasm and quiet amusement. Maybe it was the way he moved, effortless, unhurried, utterly unbothered by anything except whatever flora had captured his attention next. Or maybe—God help you—it was just him.
Not that you’d ever admit that. You’d rather eat your own boots.
Still, you couldn’t help but watch as he suddenly stilled. His gaze snapped toward something in the distance, eyes gleaming with open delight, and you knew—instinctively, immediately—that something was about to go down.
And sure enough—
"Ah."
That single, quiet syllable was so ominous you had to physically fight the urge to take a step back.
Then, Jade turned toward you, expression eerily composed despite the unmistakable excitement in his gaze, and said, “Do you see that mushroom?”
You followed his gaze toward the completely ordinary-looking tree. And then you squinted.
There, just barely within sight, was a mushroom.
A mushroom that looked like every other goddamn mushroom you had passed on this trip.
And yet.
Based on the way Jade’s entire soul had just left his body in pure, unfiltered joy, you could only assume it was some rare, once-in-a-lifetime god of the fungi.
You watched as he immediately took his phone out, snapping so many pictures you were half convinced he was going to submit them to a mushroom appreciation forum.
Then he paused.
And the exhilaration on his face dimmed—just slightly.
Because, unfortunately for him, the mushroom in question was just barely out of reach.
And you—a fool, an absolute clown, an irredeemable dumbass—
Put your bags down.
Walked up to him.
And lifted him up.
For a single, terrifying moment, there was silence.
Jade froze. His hands hovered in midair, like even he couldn’t quite believe what was happening.
Then, slowly, he reached forward.
Plucked the mushroom from its resting place.
And you—practically sweating bullets at the realization of what you had just done without even thinking about it—lowered him back onto solid ground.
The first thing he did was examine the sample like it was the most precious object in the entire world. The second thing he did was glance up at you—not with his usual smug amusement, not with teasing mirth, but something else entirely.
A slow, quiet smile.
Warm. Gentle. Uncharacteristically soft.
And that was the exact moment you thought, “Fuck my life, I’m doomed.”
Without another word, you picked your bags back up and followed him to the next area.
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The Gate had been particularly easy to suppress today—by which you meant no spontaneous explosions, no sudden existential dread, and, most importantly, no feeling like your brain had been wrung out like a wet dishcloth. All in all, a successful day.
So when you spotted Jade afterward, you figured you wouldn’t need much from him. A little guidance, maybe. Some grounding. Nothing too serious.
What you did not expect, however, was to immediately slump against him like a Victorian maiden succumbing to the vapors.
At first, Jade visibly tensed. His muscles coiled, and he took a sharp breath—like he had genuinely thought you had just dropped dead in his arms.
But then he glanced down.
And instead of finding you on the verge of unconsciousness due to Esper-induced burnout, he found you…completely at peace.
Relaxed.
Asleep.
And oh.
Oh, this was interesting.
Jade stilled, the way a hunter does when something rare and unexpected steps into their sights. His lips quirked, amusement flickering across his face as he tilted his head, watching you with the same fascination he reserved for poisonous plants and particularly lively prey.
You had just…collapsed. Right into his arms.
Voluntarily.
Slowly—very slowly, like he was testing the weight of a particularly fragile glass sculpture—he adjusted his stance, shifting just enough so you could lean more comfortably against him.
And when you made a soft, barely audible sigh of contentment—an actual sigh of contentment—he almost laughed.
Jade glanced around, taking in the others in the vicinity. There were still a few agents packing up equipment, cataloging monster remains, finishing the usual post-Gate cleanup. No one seemed to be paying particular attention to your current predicament.
He debated waking you.
For about half a second.
Then, instead of nudging you upright, instead of rousing you from your accidental nap, he merely settled in more comfortably, adjusted his grip, and decided:
"A little while more wouldn’t hurt."
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The first time you met Floyd Leech was…an experience.
Not in the way people say, “Oh, yeah, skydiving was an experience!” or “That seafood buffet really did a number on my stomach, what an experience!” No. This was more of a “I just survived a category five hurricane with nothing but a pool noodle and sheer willpower” kind of experience.
You knew Jade's twin was an Esper, and you'd heard the rumors about Floyd’s personality. Some people said he was unpredictable, others called him a walking natural disaster with an attention span that could either last three seconds or three months. B Rank Esper Floyd Leech, SSS Rank Menace.
And then, by sheer misfortune (or fate, depending on whose side you were on), you both ended up suppressing the same Gate.
Hearing him laugh as he shredded a monster like it was nothing but a chew toy was unsettling even for you. You had seen horrors beyond human comprehension, had fought creatures made of shadows and teeth, had experienced the kind of pain that would make a lesser being crumble—and yet.
Yet.
The way Floyd’s eyes locked onto you in the middle of the battlefield, the way his grin stretched wider, wider, as if he had just found a new favorite thing to play with—your instincts screamed at you. Your fight-or-flight response hit so hard you almost accidentally activated your Esper abilities on pure reflex.
(And the worst part? You were technically stronger than him. That did not make you feel any safer.)
Then, as if to truly cement his status as an absolute enigma, he took one look at you, tilted his head, and said:
"Ooooh~! A shrimpy!"
A shrimpy.
He just…he called you shrimpy.
And the worst part? It was kind of funny. Actually, it was lowkey adorable.
So you just. Didn’t stop him.
Which he took as an invitation, apparently, because the next thing you knew, he was slapping an arm around your shoulders like you were old friends. And with zero hesitation, he dragged you along as you both exited the Gate, whistling a happy little tune as if he hadn’t just been reveling in combat two minutes ago.
You barely had time to process what had just happened before you saw Jade.
Jade’s gaze looked…sharper.
It wasn’t obvious—he was still smiling, still polite, still the ever-composed Guide who had saved your ass on multiple occasions—but there was a distinct flicker of something behind his eyes as he looked at Floyd practically draping himself over you.
He didn’t say anything. Didn’t frown. Didn’t tell Floyd off.
He simply stepped forward, placed a hand on your shoulder, and gently pulled you away.
And just like that, the weight of Floyd’s arm disappeared, replaced by the steadier, more deliberate touch of his twin.
And Floyd?
Floyd just looked between the two of you.
Then, he grinned.
Then, he laughed.
And then, with all the enthusiasm of a man about to cause absolute chaos, he threw his head back and cackled.
"Ooooh, Azul is gonna LOVE this~!"
And before you could even begin to ask what the hell that meant, he waved and walked off toward a Guide—one who was probably prepared to deal with his absolute insanity.
You barely had time to recover before Jade gestured for you to sit.
Guidance was nothing new at this point. Usually, he just held your hand, grounded you with a touch, let his presence stabilize your energy until you were back to normal.
But today.
Today, he touched your foreheads together.
Your breath caught.
His hand was light against your jaw, but firm enough to keep you still. His forehead pressed against yours, close enough that you could feel his breath ghosting against your lips.
Your eyes fluttered shut on pure reflex, your fists clenching as if that would somehow stop the sudden, ridiculous way your pulse spiked.
This was fine.
This was fine.
Your mind was clear. Your energy was balanced. You were not thinking about his breath on your lips.
You absolutely, one hundred percent, were not thinking about how his voice, so soft, so deceptively gentle, murmured:
"Breathe."
You were so, so doomed.
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The Gate had been massive—one of the worst ones in years.
It had opened with no warning, no telltale energy fluctuations, nothing. By the time the first responders had arrived, the battlefield was already drenched in blood.
A-class Espers, gone.
S-class Espers, gone.
By the time you had been thrown into the fray, the situation had spiraled so far out of control that your arrival felt less like a strategic decision and more like a last-ditch gamble.
Eight hours.
Eight hours of relentless combat.
Wave after wave, monster after monster, every time you cut one down, another two would replace it.
You had fought until your muscles felt like molten lead, until your vision blurred at the edges, until the very air around you burned with overuse of your own power—until the Gate finally stabilized just enough for you to close it.
And then, you stumbled out.
And everything hurt.
Everything was too much.
The sound of voices, the shifting of energy, the distant cries of the wounded—it all crashed into you like a tidal wave, scraping against your raw, frayed nerves. You were this close to losing control, to snapping under the pressure, to letting your Esper abilities swallow you whole.
But Jade wasn’t here.
Jade, your Guide, the one person who knew how to handle you when you reached your breaking point—wasn’t here.
Apparently, no one had informed him of your involvement in the battle. He was still on his way.
Which meant you were falling apart, and there was no one to catch you.
And so, the SSS-ranked Guide on standby stepped in.
The moment their hands touched you, you recoiled. Their presence was too much, too invasive, too overbearing, like someone trying to force a puzzle piece where it didn’t belong.
But you didn’t have a choice.
Their energy pressed against yours, crushing down, shoving your frayed emotions back into place like jamming a lid onto a boiling pot.
You wanted to throw up.
Your entire body screamed wrong, wrong, wrong.
But if you pushed them away, if you lost control, if you went berserk right here in the aftermath of this bloodbath—people would die.
So you clung to them, shaking, white-knuckled, letting them guide you as best as they could.
And you hoped—prayed—that Jade would get here soon.
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When Jade first stabilized you, he had thought of you as entertainment.
It was hilarious, really. The strongest Esper to ever exist, the one the government practically worshiped, the one whose very presence made monsters hesitate—completely helpless without him.
Oh, you could fight. You could tear through Gates like they were made of paper, you could reduce monsters to mist and regrets, but the moment it was over? The moment your power turned inward and tried to rip you apart? Only he could fix it.
Jade had never considered himself sentimental, and certainly not possessive. People were people. They came, they went, they lived, they died. He had met more than a few Espers in his life, had guided his fair share, and yet—none of them had ever needed him. Not the way you did.
And the best part? You were terrified of hurting him.
Absolutely adorable.
Your desperation to keep him safe was comedy gold. You were an SSS-rank nightmare, strong enough to turn city blocks into craters, and yet, the moment he touched you, you flinched like you might break him. You barely let him guide you for more than a few minutes, always watching him like he was made of glass, like he might shatter if you took too much.
Jade had never been one for attachment, so he simply dodged all your attempts at even a temporary bond. What was the point? He liked the little game you two had going on. You kept asking, kept trying to tie him down, and he kept laughing and evading, watching you get more and more frustrated. Too much fun to stop now.
Even when he invited you to the nature trail, it had been on a whim. A little curiosity, a little test. He expected you to sulk in the corner, maybe grumble under your breath about how boring it was, or sigh dramatically like you were suffering for his sake.
Instead, you had participated.
You had followed him through the trees, asked questions, even leaned in close to examine the plants he showed you. And when he couldn’t reach a mushroom, you had—without hesitation, without even thinking—simply lifted him up.
Like it was the most natural thing in the world.
That had been the moment something inside him had shifted.
Jade wasn’t sure he liked it.
It was unfamiliar, uncomfortable. Unsettling. A quiet sort of tug, deep in his chest, something that made him pause when he looked at you.
Before, it had been easy to laugh off questions.
"Jade, what’s the deal with you and them?" someone would ask, and he would smirk, deflect, change the subject.
Now?
Now, when people asked, he had to bite back the urge to say, “They’re mine.”
So when he heard about the Gate—eight hours, a battle, an ambush that had already killed dozens before you were called in—
He didn’t hesitate.
He had barely taken the time to grab Floyd, all but shoving him into the driver’s seat. "Drive."
Floyd, ever delighted by drama, had driven like a man possessed. Jade wasn’t entirely sure how they weren’t in a burning wreck by the time they arrived, but at least they got there fast.
And when he stepped onto the battlefield, pushing past medics, ignoring protocol—he saw you.
Sick. Wounded. Barely standing.
In the arms of someone else.
His stomach turned.
Jade had never experienced jealousy before, not in any real way. He was too patient, too controlled, too much of a sadist to truly be envious of anything. But seeing you there, shaking and exhausted, clinging to someone who wasn’t him—
Something ugly coiled in his chest.
For the first time in his life, Jade Leech felt like throwing up.
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The moment you saw Jade, it was over for the poor, unfortunate soul currently keeping you upright.
You shoved the deeply offended Guide off you like they were an inconvenience, a minor roadblock between you and salvation. You could apologize later. Right now, your legs were giving out, your head was spinning, and the only thing you knew for certain was that you needed him.
Jade barely had time to react before you reached for him, stumbling forward, barely coherent, barely standing.
And he ran to you.
Jade Leech—calm, composed, unshakable Jade—ran.
You collapsed against him the second he was close enough, clutching him like a man stranded in the desert clutching the first drop of rain. His touch was the only thing keeping you tethered to reality, the only thing that made the burning, suffocating feeling inside you ease just a little.
“Thank you,” you gasped, fingers twisting in the fabric of his uniform, voice barely above a whisper. “Thank you for coming.”
Jade stiffened.
You barely registered it. You were too far gone, too exhausted, too feverish. But if you had been paying attention, you would have seen something rare, something almost unheard of—
Jade Leech looking completely and utterly shocked.
Like he hadn’t expected you to say that. Like he hadn’t expected you to look at him like he was something worth holding onto.
And then, because you were nothing if not a disaster, you giggled—actually giggled, delirious and exhausted and overwhelmed by relief.
“Your face…” you murmured, the edges of your vision darkening. “You look so—”
And then you went completely limp in his arms.
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Jade was not panicking.
No, truly, he wasn’t. Panic was an unbecoming emotion, a pointless thing that only clouded one’s judgment. It was inefficient. Wasteful. Jade Leech did not panic.
So when you went completely limp in his arms, when your body sagged against him like a puppet with its strings cut, he did not panic.
He simply—assessed the situation.
He shook you gently, then not-so-gently, but you were completely unresponsive, your breath coming in short, ragged gasps. His hands slid over your back, fingers pressing against the pulse points in your wrists, your neck—too fast, too unsteady, too weak.
He tried guiding you, pushing that familiar, stabilizing force into you, but it was like pouring water into a cup that had already shattered—it wasn’t enough.
You needed something more.
Jade hesitated.
For the first time in years, he hesitated.
And then, before he could think better of it, before he could talk himself out of it, he leaned in and kissed you.
It was not soft, nor was it gentle. This was not a kiss meant to be romantic, nor was it something he had ever done before. But kissing—intimate, overwhelming, all-encompassing kissing—had long been known as one of the most effective ways for a Guide to stabilize an Esper.
And Jade had never needed to put in this much effort before.
Your lips were warm beneath his, feverish and trembling. He could feel it the second it worked—your grip on him tightened, fingers twisting in his coat as you gasped against his mouth. A shudder ran through your body as you pulled him closer, kissed him back.
Jade felt something snap.
It was an ugly thing, this feeling in his chest. Sharp-edged and burning. He didn’t know if he was kissing you to help you, to save you—
Or if he was kissing you because he wanted to.
But then—oh, then—his lips curled against yours as a slow, unbearable sense of triumph unfurled inside him. Because you weren’t just kissing him back.
You were kissing him back in front of everyone.
In front of all the other Guides who had spent years chasing after you, aching for the chance to stabilize you, to prove themselves worthy of being your match.
And yet, it was his arms you had collapsed into. His touch that had soothed you. His lips you were parting for, grasping at like he was the only thing keeping you from slipping into the abyss.
Jade had spent months dodging your attempts at forming a temporary bond, laughing as you fumbled for something more than what he was willing to give.
Now, you were clinging to him.
And wasn’t that just the most delicious thing?
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Waking up to someone kissing you was new.
Waking up to Jade kissing you, though? That was absolutely not on your bingo card.
Your mind, sluggish from the near-death experience of the century, took a moment to catch up. There was warmth against your lips—soft, careful, lingering. A hand at the back of your neck, cool fingers threading through your hair. The faint scent of damp earth and saltwater, familiar, grounding.
And then, your body caught up with your brain and realized oh, holy shit, that’s Jade.
A normal person would pull away, maybe demand an explanation. Possibly scream.
You?
You wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him closer.
Jade let out a noise—half a laugh, half a surprised hum—but he didn’t stop you. If anything, he melted into you, his lips curling into a smile against yours. His hand tightened at your nape, fingers splaying against your back, and when you deepened the kiss, he sighed into your mouth like he had been waiting for you to do it.
That was almost enough to send you straight into cardiac arrest.
When you finally pulled away, you were fully awake, body thrumming with energy. Not just from the guiding—though, yeah, that was part of it—but from the undeniable, inescapable fact that Jade Leech had just kissed you. That you had kissed him back.
Jade didn’t move far. If anything, he leaned in closer, forehead brushing against yours, his breath still warm on your lips. His gaze flickered across your face, taking in the flush burning its way up your cheeks, the way you were still holding onto him like you’d fall apart if you let go.
You wanted to say something, maybe tease him, maybe demand an explanation, but words weren’t exactly functioning right now. You could barely think beyond holy shit that was the best kiss of my life.
Jade, for once, wasn’t smug.
Or, no. He was trying to be. He had the smirk, the casual tone, the playful tilt of his head. But his fingers twitched against your back, his grip just a little too tight. And when he finally spoke, his voice was a fraction softer than usual, a little too careful.
"Would you," he said, "perhaps, be interested in permanently bonding with me?"
You blinked.
Jade Leech. Jade Leech. The same Jade who had dodged every attempt you made at even a temporary bond, who found it hilarious that only he could stabilize you, who treated your guiding sessions like some kind of ongoing game.
That Jade had just asked if you wanted to bond.
Permanently.
Your heart stuttered. His hand was trembling.
He swallowed, like he was waiting for you to say no.
You didn't answer. Not with words, anyway. Instead, you grabbed him by the collar and kissed him again.
Jade made a startled sound before melting into you completely, his arms locking around you like he had no plans of letting go. His lips curled into another smile against yours—this time, not smug, but genuine.
Like he had won.
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You had asked him eighteen times.
Eighteen.
And, frankly, Jade was getting impatient.
The first time, it had been endearing. You had looked at him with wide, wary eyes, like you thought this was some elaborate joke. You had stammered out a, "You—You're sure? Like, actually sure?" and Jade, who was in a good mood, had simply hummed and said yes.
The second time, it had been amusing. You had grabbed him by the wrist, pulled him aside, and, in a whisper like you were plotting treason, said, "Look, I won’t be mad if you back out. You know that, right? Like, this is a huge deal, and if this was just, y’know, heat of the moment, that’s totally okay. No hard feelings."
The third, fourth, fifth, and so on?
Infuriating.
Jade could not, for the life of him, figure out how to convince you that he meant what he said. Yes, he wanted to bond. Yes, permanently. No, he had not lost his mind.
And yet, here you were, pacing across his living room, your arms crossed, rambling for the nineteenth time about how he still had a choice, how you wouldn’t hold it against him if he didn’t want to go through with it, how he wouldn’t be able to guide anyone else ever again if he bonded to you, how that might be too much to give up.
Jade, stretched out on the couch, chin propped against his palm, sighed.
He had enough patience to last centuries.
But this?
This was getting ridiculous.
"—and I'm just saying," you continued, voice a little frantic, "I've seen Guides get really resentful about it. You could go from stabilizing a hundred people to just me. And you know how bad I get, how it hurts, and I'm not saying you can't handle it, but, like, are you sure? Like, really sure? Because—"
Jade leaned forward, grabbed your collar, and kissed you.
You stumbled, caught off guard, and his lips curled when he felt you tense up before relaxing completely. He kissed you slow, deliberate, like he was trying to make you feel the answer you had refused to believe.
And when he finally pulled away, he let his teeth graze your bottom lip just slightly, smirking when he felt you shiver.
"Does that answer your question?" he asked, voice smooth, teasing.
You opened and closed your mouth like a fish out of water.
Jade’s smirk widened.
"You're overthinking it," he said, reaching out, gripping your wrist, tugging you closer. "There’s no one who could entertain me quite like you do, you know? Maybe it’s time for a career change. I’ll be your Guide, and yours alone."
Something inside you lurched.
Something possessive.
Jade, yours.
Only yours.
His gaze flickered to your lips. Amused. Challenging.
"So?" he said, voice mocking light, but his fingers tightened around your wrist, his pulse beating just a little too fast. "Are we doing this or not?"
Your breath hitched.
And then, you grabbed him by his collar, yanked him down, and kissed him again.
This time, you bit his lip.
Jade laughed into your mouth—pleased, triumphant—before pulling you against him and kissing you so deeply you felt it in your bones.
And just like that, the bond clicked into place.
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Waking up with Jade curled against you was a rare privilege.
For one, he was a light sleeper. Most of the time, you barely shifted and he’d already be watching you like some creepy forest cryptid. But today, he must’ve been exhausted from the bonding because he was still tucked against you, his breathing slow and utterly unguarded.
It was… nice.
Nice enough that you felt unreasonably smug about it.
You shifted just a little, tightening your hold around him, and he hummed in contentment, pressing closer without fully waking up. Unfair. How was this the same Jade who deliberately guided you half the time by whispering things against your lips just to make you flustered?
You could get used to this.
And then it hit you.
You’d bonded. Permanently.
But you had never actually asked him to be yours.
As in, romantically.
Your eyes snapped open. Oh. Oh, you had fumbled.
You knew Jade had agreed to the bond, obviously, but—was he in love with you? Did he see this as just a Guide-Esper partnership? Did you just lock yourself into a lifelong working relationship like some corporate contract??
He slowly stirred and just as he blinked at you, before you could think better of it, you blurted out, "What are we?"
Jade went still.
Like, completely, horrifyingly motionless.
You felt him exhale sharply, his hand twitching against your side, as if physically restraining himself.
For a long moment, he said nothing.
Then, finally, slowly, he pulled back just enough to look at you, and the expression on his face was somewhere between fondness, disbelief, and the soul-crushing realization that he was in love with a complete idiot.
"...Are you serious?" he asked, his voice painfully even.
You hesitated. "...Yes?"
Jade closed his eyes.
He inhaled.
He exhaled.
He inhaled again.
Then, finally, he muttered, "God give me strength."
You frowned. "Look, I’m just saying, you never actually—"
"Do you think I would bond with you permanently if I wasn't in love with you?" he asked, voice slower, more deliberate, as if carefully handling a very stupid but very precious object.
You blinked.
Paused.
And then you felt heat creep up your neck.
"...Oh," you said, a little dumbly.
Jade sighed.
But before he could say anything else, you reached out and pulled him back into your chest.
You hid your face against his hair.
"...Love you too," you mumbled, voice muffled, but he could hear the smile in it.
Jade, after a long beat of silence, finally let out a breathless laugh.
And as you held him close, warm and undeniably happy, he thought, Yup. They’re my dumbass.
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Masterlist
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quazies · 9 months ago
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Well, the past week has been frustrating.
I’ll do my best to explain what’s gone wrong, but I don’t blame anyone who can’t wrap their head around it, because it’s a confusing mess. 
Within the past couple weeks I’ve made a new Adsense account under my business info (new bank account, tax number, etc) and it’s been rejected. Without an Adsense account linked to your YouTube, you can’t make ANY money from your videos. Because of “policy” they can’t tell me the EXACT thing I’ve done wrong, so I get to play the guessing game and loose the majority of my livelihood in the meanwhile!! Yippie!!! Just what I needed while working on one of my longest most ambitious projects yet!!! 
I have savings so it’s not a complete emergency, I can penny pinch for the next 30 to 90 days, or however long they keep me from monetizing my animations again. Thanks to my amazing Patrons, I still have a safety net for when stupid stuff like this happens.
Please consider checking out my Patreon while this BS is happening. I have 50 pages of storyboards up for my newest Godzilla animation, Character sheets, and when storyboarding wraps up I’ll be posting animation sneak peeks as well. Any support is greatly appreciated, and overall I just wanted folks to be aware of the situation. YouTube seems to enjoy finding new ways to disappoint me! I hope to one day reach my Patreon goal so I don’t have to feel so reliant on them to do what I love: making cartoons for you guys. I’ve had multiple situations of YouTube being unhelpful and this is definitely the worst case yet.
If you’re still reading, thanks for hearing me out, and if you’d like to check out the Patreon, it’s linked in my bio. Thank you guys as always, and thanks for watching my cartoons!
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yup-no-way · 1 month ago
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Astro Observations pt. 3
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Hi there! So here comes another astro observations post. But before I have to rant. Man…uni is kicking me in the butt (average engineering student). Like wdym I have a month till my finals and I have a research paper, 3 projects, 2 lab reports, 2 Tests and one lab exam due. And I have to start studying for my finals as well. ߹ ᯅ ߹
These observations are based on my personal experiences so don’t take it as full facts. These placements can also be influenced by other things in someone’s chart like degrees, houses and aspects. Also if u have any suggestions for what content you’d like to see feel free to let me know. English is not my first language lads so don’t drag me for grammatical errors. xoxo
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Venus trine Ascended aspect: how does it feel to be life’s favourite . Like these people just have it like that. They are genuinely beautiful people and while that can manifest as conventional attractive, from my personal experience, their beauty is very unique , depending on other aspects in their chart. But whatever style of beauty they have, they embody it fully and they turn eyes wherever they go. Also these are the type of people who’s beauty is influenced by how they feel about themselves so if you practice self love and acceptance then that’s when you radiate the most.
Pluto 10h: huuuuge issues with authority figures. Mostly these people fall into 2 categories. First one, they always feel suppressed but push back therefore getting into arguments with those authority figures. Second one, they feel suppressed but don’t say anything, they prefer to lay low and not confront those issues. Overall for each case it’s a heavy placement and causes heavy friction in your life. These people also almost 100% have (or had) a lot of arguments with their parents. BUT, if you channel this energy by learning how to play the cards you’ve been dealt and manipulate situations without coming so upfront then this placement is so powerful, especially in regards to career. CEO energy. These people rlly would much rather work for themselves. I could go on hours talking ab Pluto, but I’ll leave it for another post because this planet is so interesting and people need to learn how to harness its energy better.
Lilith Gemini: worst nightmare for these people? Being perceived as dumb. They will rather be called ugly, weird etc. than being called stupid. And the best part? They aren’t stupid at all. Their most cunning aspect? Their intelligence. For some, they might’ve actually been perceived as slow when younger but worked hard just to not be associated with that imagine anymore.
4th house in Gemini: for a lot of these people, their home never felt that welcoming when young. This placement indicated a home/environment where growing intellectually/academically was very important (more important than their emotional state). Geminis 4th house experienced a lot of shame regarding their grades in their home/school or faced immense pressure to be “the first in class”. Also, this placement can be harder to navigate because due to the lack of support they might’ve felt in their environment. I wanna give you guys a big hug, seriously. You are more than your academics. Lots of love to yous xoxo
Venus trine Pluto: these people are magnetic. They are also mostly perceived way differently than they are (kinda sad tbh). So many people with this placement are hard to approach, even if they are genuinely nice people, at least once in their life, someone told them they look intimidating. This placement might not get hit on as much because of it. People tend to have fantasies regarding this collective, specifically in the house of your Pluto. For example if you have a Pluto in the 2nd house, they might fantasise about you taking them out for a shopping spree or them taking you out and spoiling you. If you have Pluto 10th house, then maybe they are very attracted to your work persona and might fantasise about some forbidden work love. You get the point. This placement is very intense but it can attract unhealthy relationships. You need to learn your toxic pattern and make sure you do not repeat it.
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I hope you guys enjoyed this as well! I will be diversifying my content soon, I just had some more placements I wanted to talk about before I start smth new. Also I don’t have that many observations today since I have been focused on writing another Astro blog that is coming soon (I am so exited). Before my next astro observations post I’ll need to gather more info (aka psychoanalyse all my friends and the people around me)
Till next time xoxo
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eeksburner · 2 months ago
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Oh, Baby
Husband!Simon Riley x PregnantWife!Reader
(Note: I'm going to be honest, I wasn't planning on posting here very much, but seeing all the likes and reposts I'm getting is boosting my ego and dopamine #ExFanficWriter)
Not proofread
Simon would be the best Dad. After everything with his father and the rest of his family being killed, he would be extremely hesitant to start a family of his own. It took a lot for him to open up to you and get married, so when you told him your dreams of having a sweet baby with him, his heart dropped. Simon holds a lot of love in his heart and he, too, had his fantasies of being the best daddy to a little babe, but he never thought that it would be a possibility for him. He is the most doting husband to exist, so it wasn’t hard for him to notice when you started sending one less letter a week when he was working and when he saw you less on the cameras installed at home. Simon was convinced you were cheating. It hurt initially, but he used his learned ability to become cold and set himself apart from things to get over it and finish his current mission. When he was on his drive home in his perfectly kept truck, he couldn’t help but grip the steering wheel so hard he thought it might break. After he realized the sneaky things you were doing he stopped checking in on the cameras. This was to your benefit, however, because you were able to decorate the house with pink in your pretty little maternity dress. No need to cover the cameras with towels like you had. As it turns out, two and a half months can help you develop a bump, at least in your case. As he pulled up, Simon prepared himself for the worst, bracing himself to see whatever abhorrent thing lay in the house. You stood in front of the door, ultrasound in hand, house teeming with pink balloons, pregnancy decor, and pink treats. Simon took a deep breath as he approached the eerily quiet house. He twisted the knob and opened the door to see you and everything you set up. “Surprise!” Simon’s ears were ringing and his vision blurred from a mix of anxiety and relief. Your smile faltered as you watched his unchanging expression and his rigid body stay still, staring, for a couple of minutes. Normally it wouldn't take him so long to react to something even if he was stunned, considering his training, but everything was so jarring and emotionally involved he couldn't help but need a minute. He was expecting to walk into boxes of your things, an empty house, or a man with you in the bedroom. You were expecting him to scoop you up in his arms and spin you around. Right when you were going to drop your smile and ask him what was wrong, he gained his bearings. He took slow, heavy steps towards you, eyes brimming with tears. He fell to his knees in front of you and sighed a deep breath of relief, hugging you to his body and shoving his face into your abdomen. “Si?” You couldn’t be more confused by his reaction. A muffled, “I love you so much,” came from Simon. You swore you could feel a wetness where his eyes were on your dress. “Are you happy?” you asked. Simon looked up at you with reddened, wet eyes and said, “Love, you have no idea how ecstatic I am for us, for our little lovey growing inside you.” Now it was your turn to cry, relief and love filling you. You hugged him as he stood up to give you a proper embrace. You guys eventually worked it out and Simon explained his reaction to you. At first, you were upset that he would ever think you could do that to him, but you understood after you realized where he was coming from with both his trauma and the statistics on cheating and failed marriages for military couples. If you thought he was thoughtful and dedicated before you were pregnant, he’s 10x more during and after your pregnancy. You gave birth to a healthy baby girl and named her Josie in honor of his nephew. 
Timeskip 
You sat on your couch with a deep smile on your face, the sun warming your body and your home. It was a warm summer day and you were listening to the harmonious giggles and screams of your 3-year-old daughter as her daddy chased her around the house. Your heart couldn’t feel more full as your husband and baby basked in the sweetness of love in your sanctuary. Your favorite song is hearing Josie say "Mommy" and "Daddy" in her little voice. She really is the sweetest thing you've seen. Of course, she has her moments, but she's so polite and helpful (in her own way). Minimal discipline is needed and both you and Simon handle her gently. Simon doesn't know if she's actually his kid with how even tempered she is. He made it a commitment to never shout or be rude to you or your baby and he has kept good to his word. Your pregnancy was emotional for both you and Simon. For you, it was knowing you were giving Simon the life and love he always deserved but didn’t always get. For Simon, it was knowing he was so vulnerable and putting his (now) two loves at risk with his job, but doing it anyway in the name of love and trust, something he didn’t have the privilege of truly experiencing until he met you and saw the sonogram of your Josie. He waited on you hand and foot, giving you anything you wanted or needed to ensure the smoothest experience for you. Simon didn’t know firsthand what it was like to be pregnant, but he did do hours of research on it and knew you were changing everything for and about yourself so you could have a bundle of joy. Now, he is the most doting husband and daddy. He takes Josie on daddy-daughter dates, spoils her endlessly, goes to all of her gymnastics practices, and even partakes in parent-toddler gymnastics nights. He buys her all of the best clothes and makes sure you have everything you need for her health and happiness, all while taking care of you even better than he did before. He makes sure you’re still healing from post-partum even 3 years later. He has so much love in his heart and it’s his job to share it with his two favorite girls.
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leyiorr · 9 months ago
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i wonder what i look like in your eyes.
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gojo ⋮ geto ⋮ sukuna ⋮ toji ⭑ how they see you and what you are to them.
¡! wc: 1.1k
¡! genre: tooth-rotting fluff, awful + contagious cases of lovesick men, you're literally their reason for existence
¡! an: i dropped this on another account but then abandoned it so its being posted here lolz!
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☆ - satoru gojo ⋮ a nebula
when it comes to satoru, he's always been alone in his orbit. a level of his own. he's a god among the mortal race; both blessed and cursed to walk the earth. he's his own galaxy - the brightest and the boldest.
yet his galaxy is unbearably lonely. it's expansive, a cosmic canvas of infinite possibilites. it's an inky black celestial wonder, one that leaves a hollow feeling in his chest.
until he meets you, and you become the only being in existence allowed to orbit with him. you're his nebula, chaotic and disorted yet so effortlessly the most beautiful element of his galaxy.
you blaze in brilliant, radiant light; core searing it's permeant place in the midnight backdrop. you illuminate the space with shades of the deepest indigo and violets, mingled with wisps of turquoise and teal. crimson and oranges are vibrant in your centre.
the colour stretches into the void forming intricate patters, ones he finds himself untangling to better understand you.
in the silence of space, your nebula spoke volumes; comforting him at his worst, lulling his mind into dreamless sleep. your edges are softer, the colours more muted as you bleed into him. no one can tell where you begin and he ends.
you are so so small in comparison to the void, but so unbearably bright that you light it all with practiced ease. he tends to watch in awe as you decorate his solar system; nursing new stars to weave into his soul.
with you there, his universe becomes easier to live in, easier to navigate. you're a cloud of interstellar stardust - held together by the gravitational attraction of satoru's galaxy.
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☆ - suguru geto ⋮ the artist
to suguru, you're the best thing that's happened to him. ever.
anyone who sees him with you knows. they know he's infatuated, enamoured. he's so far gone that people often think that he's been blinded by love, but he has simply never felt an emotion so intense.
with you he thinks he truly sees the world in all it's glory, innocent and pure. with you he traverses unpolluted by the atrocities of the world, you who colours his world.
he looks at you like you personally hang the stars in the sky when night rolls around, like you paint the sorbet sunsets by hand. he stares at you adoringly, as if you chose the colour of the sea and dusted white on the peaks of mountains to keep them warm.
he peers at you like you solely gift the flowers with their petals, dipping them in shades you deem beautiful enough. like you create the sand from scratch and lay it in pretty semi-lunar shapes next to the ocean.
he gazes at you like diamonds were invented in tribute to your tears, like you drew the prettiest landscapes alone in the quiet, before the age of humanity.
he studies you like you've sculpted the very shape of his heart - every ventricle and atrium handcrafted with your pretty fingers. as if his very existence was molded by you, hence why you fit so perfectly together; two pieces of a puzzle.
he could stare at you for hours and days on end, eyes full of love for the person who introduces him to a plethora of hues and tones that he imprints on the back of his eyelids when he sleeps.
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☆ - ryomen sukuna ⋮ the breath of life
sukuna is not a good person. everybody knows that. he's taken innocent lives, sapping their energy like it's nothing. he's all-powerful; he stands amongst the deities - gods who have the capacity to bend fate to their will.
but after millennia of having everything under his rule, he's gotten bored. he has servants to order as he pleases but nothing they do entertains him. the god of death is bored, embarrassingly so.
until he acquires something known as a significant other, the other half of his soul as the humans say. you're his breath of life, a release of old, stagnant energy. it's as if you breathe vitality into everything you touch, all life forms flocking to you naturally.
you're so much softer than he, touch delicate yet profound, an ethereal caress that lights sparks in his eyes. he tends to linger quietly by your side when you walk in the garden he constructed just for you - though he would never tell you that.
wildflowers are coaxed into bloom with you around, their colours a testament to your nurturing touch. the dew-laden grass basks in your presence, gleaming a shade brighter than before. even the trees seem to gravitate toward you, branches reaching for you as you pass by, their leaves sighing in contentment.
sukuna's convinced the waves follow your pace, each push and pull matches your breathing.
you were the essence of renewal. his world had found it's pulse, it's rhythm, as you dance the unending dance of life in the centre. you sustain his beating heart, so sukuna's oddly content with merely watching.
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☆ - toji fushiguro ⋮ a lover
toji sees you as not only a lover, but the lover. the only one he will have in this life and the next. there's no after you. it's a forever kinda thing.
something so simple as the title of 'lover' is so complex for toji, a man who's a veteran assassin, a man who previously had no regard for anyone else.
you're the only person toji promises to protect, to never lie to, to make happy for as long as his heart pumps and his chest rises with each breath. you're a miracle gifted to him by the gods - though he doesn't know what he's done to deserve it.
he's rough around the edges but with your standing as 'lover', you smooth him out.
he subconsciously thinks of you, always worrying for your satefy. you must be a deep ocean of the emotion known as 'passion' because he's willingly drowning, not even looking for shore.
toji looks at you like you're an extension of himself, the other half of him that the deities intended for him to find. he can't remember times before you or imagine a future without you.
he makes a deal of reminding you that you are his, just as he is completely and utterly yours. as his lover you hold his bloody, beating heart in your hands; he knows you'll keep it safe.
he stares at you like you'll disappear; like he's not even sure you actually exist. you love a man like him after all - that's a miracle in itself.
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drabbles-mc · 25 days ago
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Invisible Silver Linings (1/7)
Robert 'Bob' Reynolds x F!Reader
Series Warnings: 18+, Thunderbolts* spoilers, language, angst, mentions of scars, mentions of self-harm/suicidal ideations
Summary: You signed on to become part of a study when you realized that you didn't have anything left to lose. What harm could it really do? How much worse could it really get? ... You didn't expect to get answers to those questions. You also didn't expect to meet Bob. You'd end up thankful for at least one of those things.
Chapter Index
Word Count: 1.5k
A/N: i know i haven't written for Marvel in a while, but i started working on this lil series the second i left the theater on Thursday. it's so nice to see Lewis Pullman getting the creds he deserves. 🥰anyway!!!! I've finished this series and will be posting updates on a weekly or twice-weekly basis until it's all up here and good to go. please let me know what you think!
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“They've been taking us in batches,” you told him. You hadn't even bothered to introduce yourself to him, but from the moment they brought him into the room with the rest of you, he'd been looking around, a little twitchy and on-edge. You supposed that you couldn't really blame him. It was a strange position that you were all finding yourselves in. Then again, you had all chosen to sign up for it.
He turned and looked at you, eyes wide and worried at the same time. “Wh-what?”
You nodded in the direction of the doors on the opposite end of the room, not the ones that he had just walked through or anyone else either. One set brought you in, another set brought you out. You had yet to see anyone come back into the room after they left, and while there were plenty of things that that could mean, you wondered if it was the worst case scenario that had crossed your mind before. Judging by the look on his face, it wasn't going to take him long to think of that worst case scenario either.
“The doctors. Scientists. Whatever you wanna call them,” you gave up on titles with a shrug, “have been taking people in batches.”
His mouth dipped into a frown as he took in what you said. He looked around the room that the two of you were in, looked at all of the other people who were in there with you. No one looked very happy to be there even though, if their situations were anything like yours, they had signed off on being here. Not that you looked ecstatic either, so maybe you shouldn't judge. You were just tired. And uncomfortable. All these people stuffed into this room and they couldn't find better seating arrangements? At least the clothes they were forcing you all to wear were comfortable, even if they weren't exactly fashionable. Sure, they kind of made you feel like you were in an asylum of some kind, but they were baggy and soft so it could’ve been worse. The new guy looked like he was close to swimming in his.
He looked around long enough to realize that most people were sitting. There were limited chairs and tables, but you clearly hadn't let that deter you as you found a pocket of space on the floor to sit on. Not quite in the corner but you were far enough off to keep an eye on most of the people in the room with you. The entry door was also close by, and while you didn't have any plans or desire to make a break for it just yet, you figured that it might end up being your best bet if it came down to it. Staring down at you, he watched as you rested your head back against the wall behind you. Your legs were bent at the knee, and your arms were draped over the top of them. Whatever it was that he saw in your facial expression must've been just safe and inviting enough for him to decide to sit down next to you.
It wasn’t a graceful descent on his part, but he didn't fall on top of you. He was closer to you than maybe a stranger should've been in a place like this, but he didn’t seem like he even noticed. He crossed his legs, hands resting in his lap as he looked back and forth between you and the room around you. Something about the way he was sitting, the look on his face, he looked a little bit like a boy stuck in a man's body. He didn’t seem like the kind of person who should be signing up for sketchy medical trials that bring you to undisclosed places.
You would've been content to sit there in silence until it was your turn to get called, but apparently you were alone in that sentiment. “I'm Bob, by the way,” he said, sounding more sure of himself than he had the first time he spoke to you.
When you turned to look him in the eye, you found him already waiting and watching, an expectant look on his face that only added to the little aura of innocence around him. You figured one good turn deserved another if the two of you were going to be stuck together for now, so you gave him your name in return. He smiled at the sound of it, giving a tiny nod of acknowledgment.
“I think you're the first person I've talked to since I got here,” you told him.
He tilted his head, brows furrowing in thought. “When did you get here?”
Looking up at the ceiling, you thought about it for a moment. Being in this strange, mostly empty room that had no windows for natural light had already messed up your sense of time even though you hadn't been there that long yet. “Day before last.”
His eyes widened again. “And they still haven't taken you?”
You chuckled. “You should've seen how many people were in here. I think that's why they're doing…whatever they're doing, in batches.”
“How are they choosing people?” he asked, looking now at the small clusters of people who were still waiting. Some people were keeping to themselves, much like you had been before Bob showed up and decided to switch things up on you.
Letting your eyes close while your head was rested back, you shook your head. “No clue. I don't work here.”
He let out a quiet laugh at that. “Right. Sorry.”
Even though you weren't looking at him, choosing instead to stare at the backs of your eyelids, you could still feel the nervous energy that was radiating off him. If he kept this up, he was going to tire himself out before he even got to the hard part. If he couldn’t handle waiting, there was no way that he was going to be cut out for whatever was waiting on the other side of the exit doors. You didn’t have any words of comfort to offer him, mostly because you had no idea what the hell was really going on yourself. Something told you, though, that it wouldn’t take very long for him to pick up another topic of conversation. Wouldn’t take long for him to start asking more questions that you wouldn’t have any answers to.
As if he could hear your thoughts, he said, “Anyone say what exactly it is that they're doing?”
You didn’t open your eyes. “Nope.”
When he spoke up again, his voice was softer, almost like he was afraid for anyone to hear what he was saying. “I hope it works.”
That got you to crack one eye open so you could give him a bit of a sideways glance. He wasn’t looking at you anymore, instead his stare was fixed on the hem of his pants. He'd found a loose thread and was starting to pick at it.
“What'd they tell you?” you asked.
You wondered briefly if his eyes would ever end up getting stuck wide like that. “What?”
Turning your head to face him in earnest once more, you elaborated. “What'd they tell you they were doing? What'd they offer you to do this?”
His expression dampened, and suddenly it was like he couldn’t meet your eyes. His focus shifted back to the thread. He was shaking his head, and something told you the action wasn't directed at you, but rather at himself. “They said that they could make me great. They…they could make me better.” He found it in himself to look at you, and it was then that you could see how glassy his eyes had gotten. “I really wanna be better.” He sniffed, blinking a few times to beat his tears back into submission. Giving his head and shoulders a small shake, he tried to get himself sounding normal again as he asked, “Wh-what'd they tell you?”
“Something similar.” The point of your elbows dug into the tops of your knees as you dropped your head into your hands. Raking your fingers back along your scalp, you rested with your head down for a moment before looking at Bob again. “I'm not really looking to be great. I just,” you shrugged, “it can't get much worse for me so I figured why not?”
The genuine sadness on his face shocked you. All those feelings for someone who was a complete stranger to him. “Oh. I'm sor—”
You waved him off before he could finish the apology. “Don't be. Not like any of it was your fault. Besides, we both still ended up here regardless,” you made a brief gesture to the room, “so what the fuck does it really matter?”
There was a thoughtful frown on his face as he considered your words. “Right.” Quiet filled the space between you again. You could only try to venture a guess at what Bob was thinking about. Probably everything that led him here—that's what you'd spent most of your time thinking about, anyway. Wondering if this was the right choice or not, not that there were many other choices at your disposal anyway. No use in regretting it. You were here in your pajama uniform with Bob and dozens of other people whose names you hadn't bothered to try and learn. This was what you had now. There was nothing more to it than that.
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Marvel Taglist (please let me know if you'd like to be added!): @garbinge @artemiseamoon @late-to-the-party-81 @blackhawkfanatic
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yumeka-sxf · 4 months ago
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Japanese Linguistic Observations in Spy x Family - part 6
Part 6 – Supporting character musings – Eden kids
In the first three parts of this post series, I talked in detail about how each of the Forgers' specific ways of speaking in the Japanese version helps shape their character. Now I want to analyze the supporting SxF characters in terms of their speech and see what traits we can infer. I'll discuss the Eden kids first, and then the supporting adult characters like Yuri, Fiona, etc, in the next post.
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I'm going to start with Damian since I feel he has the most complexity in terms of what can be analyzed from his speech. While there's nothing about his speech that really stands out to me, at least compared to the Forgers, there's still little telling nuances based on his choice of words and honorifics. He uses casual speech for fellow kids his age, and polite speech for (most) adults, which is normal…I say "most" adults though because, while he uses keigo (the standard polite form of Japanese speech) for Eden teachers and the adults in his family, he doesn't use it at all during his first encounter with Loid. He even calls Loid おっさん("ossan"), which is basically "mister" but for middle-aged or older men, instead of 兄さん("niisan"), which is the same, but for a younger man akin to Loid's age.
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Later, as Loid's goody-goody act gets on his nerves, his speech becomes a bit vulgar. He adamantly shouts that he "won't hang out with that peasant girl," using the "crude" conjugation of "won't be friends with/hang out with", 相手にしねー! ("aitei ni shine!") instead of the casual 相手にしない ("aitei ni shinai"). He even says うるせー ("urusee") which means "shut up" and is even more rude than うるさい ("urusai"). I'm actually surprised he let himself talk like that in front of Donovan. I suppose it shows how passionate he is about his "aversion" to Anya.
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Speaking of Anya, he's never addressed her by name in the Japanese version, opting instead to call her, at best, the casual form of "you," "omae" ("お前") and at worst, some rude name like "temee" ("手前"), the derogatory form of "you."
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When it comes to his family, he addresses Donovan and Melinda as 父上 ("chichi-ue") and 母上("haha-ue") respectively. These are more formal terms for the standard polite ones typically used to address your father and mother, "o-tou-san" (お父さん) and "o-kaa-san" (お母さん). For Demetris though, he's more casual. Not only does he use plain speech, but he also calls Demetris 兄貴 ("aniki"), which is a term of endearment, like "Big Bro."
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He uses casual speech with Jeeves as well, which makes sense since Jeeves is a butler and thus "lower" than anyone in the Desmond household.
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To me, all of this implies that Damian is a fairly normal kid in terms of how he addresses those around him, with the exception being his extreme formality with his parents. Terms like "chichi-ue" and "haha-ue" are mostly used in uptight, flatulent families, and obviously families like the Desmonds match that description. But it also shows how this is forcing Damian to rarely get the affection and bonding he craves from his parents.
As a side note, I don't have much to say about Bill and George, since they're such minor characters and nothing about their speech stood out to me in the few chapters they appeared in. But I found it interesting that they both call Damian "Damian-kun," with "-kun" in this case being an honorific to show endearment for a male equal, similar to "-chan" for females. However, Damian doesn't use "-kun" with any of the other male students, which is another indication of his comparatively standoffish personality.
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Ewen and Emile speak similarly to Damian, using casual speech for fellow kids and keigo for adults. The exception with them, however, is that they address Damian with keigo as well. Not only that, but they call him "Damian-sama," which is unusual among friends their age. The honorific "-sama" is more humbling than "-san" and is often translated as "Lord" or "Master." I wonder what Damian has done to make them think so highly of him.
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Moving onto Becky, she uses feminine speech in most situations. This speech is defined by adding softening interjections at the end of sentences, like "ne" (ね), "no" (の), and especially "wa" (わ). She also uses a variety of honorifics for the other characters. She calls Anya "Anya-chan," with "-chan" being a term that shows affection between female friends. She uses the feminine "I/me" pronoun "atashi" as well.
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Because of her infatuation with Loid, she calls him "Loid-sama," with "-sama," as I just discussed, being a very polite honorific used for someone you're subservient to, or at least someone you look up to immensely.   
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She's actually never called Yor by her name – at first she calls Yor 奥さま ("oku-sama"), which is a polite way of addressing someone else's wife, typically translated as something like "honorable wife." But after she sees how strong Yor is and "officially" decides to be her mentee (in her mind anyway), she calls Yor 師匠 ("shishou") which means "master" or "teacher" in a trainee to trainer sense.
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But despite her high social status as a Blackbell, Becky uses the most childish terms for her mother and father, "papa" (パパ) and "mama" (ママ) respectively.
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It's not uncommon for very young kids to address their parents in such a way, but it is ironic that everything else about Becky makes her seem like she wants to be more "grown-up" than she actually is, but she's still just a kid deep down, at least when it comes to her relationship with her parents.
Continue to Part 7 ->
<- Return to Part 5
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supernotnatural2005 · 7 months ago
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The Great Sam Winchester C*ck Block!
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Pairing: Dean x Reader
Summary: Dean and you have been desperate for some much needed alone time. However, a certain Winchester keeps getting in the way.
Word Count: 4106
Warnings: Smut! 18+ ONLY!!! Fluff, Sam is a massive c*ck block (yes that’s a warning!)
A/N: I know it’s been a hot minute since i posted anything. Life has been wild. But i miss writing so much and have a few WIP. This just happens to be the one i’ve finished! 😅 Just something fun and spicy. I hope you enjoy and feedback is always welcome!
My Masterlist
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You sighed, head thrown back against the leather seat, back arched and legs spread wide as Dean scissored two of his thick fingers inside of you.
Soft lips caressed the sensitive skin of your neck and suckled at the spot behind your ear, which only added to the desperate throb of the walls of your pussy.
Your skin flushed and breathing laboured as he expertly rubbed at that spongey spot inside you, making you gasp and tense at the thrum of pleasure, tingling from the tops of your ears down to the tips of your toes.
The soft praises of; “you’re so wet”, “so beautiful” and “come for me baby”, followed by the lewd sounds of your dripping core against the harsh thrust of his digits, echoed in the small confinements of Baby’s backseat. Resulting in an ecstasy like state of desperation to reach your peak for him.
Your hands found purchase on his broad shoulders, the material covering his skin all but assaulted by your vice-like grip, as he brought you closer and closer to your impending crash.
You opened your eyes, gaze heated and glazed as you met fiery green orbs, drinking in your wrecked state with satisfaction and pride.
With his thumb now rubbing against your clit, you could feel your body begin to tense. The coil in your lower belly wound tight, ready to just about snap, when something over his shoulder caught your attention.
“Sam!” You gasped in an attempt to warn him. Though in your current state, it came out as more of a gasp of unmeant pleasure. But it had Dean’s fingers stilling instantly, drowning the flame he’d brought to life inside of you.
“What?” The shock was evident in his voice and the same eyes that had been filled with lust just moments ago, now laced with hurt at your outburst of his brother’s name. Made ten times worse at the fact it was whilst he was fingering you into oblivion.
Dread filled you at his harshly retracted fingers and you scrambled to explain before another fire brewed in his eyes, but this time with intent to burn rather than pleasure.
“Oh God, no baby! Sam is coming.” You guided his head in the direction of the other end on the motel’s parking lot, to where Sam was indeed approaching.
Relief flooded him like a cold drink of water quenching one’s thirst in a hot desert. His rapidly beating heart simmered somewhat at the realisation and he welcomed the soothing hand you ran through his short strands as he dropped his forehead to your shoulder.
You felt the rumble of his chuckle before you heard it, finding yourself joining in at the absurdity and worst timing ever of your boyfriend’s baby-bro.
“I guess we’re gonna have to pick this up another time.” He sighed disappointedly, but his eyes held a promise you clung to.
Sam Winchester was many things. A great hunter, empathetic and kind, your best friend. But mostly, he was the most oblivious cock block known to man.
For weeks you and Dean had been trying to have a little alone time. If it wasn’t the motel’s having only one twin room left, or a case taking its tole on you both to the point of pure exhaution, it was Sam’s impeccable timing.
You righted yourself by pulling on your discarded underwear and sleep-shorts, grimacing as the fabric met the mess between your legs.
Dean casually sucked his fingers clean of your juices, making your jaw drop and clit pulse in want.
Noticing your longing stare, he winked and slid a hand beneath his sweat pants to adjust the obvious tent, just in time for Sam to tap on the window.
“What are you guys doing out here? I tried calling you both for the past half hour.” Dean had opened the back seat and stepped out, allowing you to shuffle to the edge of the seat.
“I had a nightmare.” You lied easily as you stepped out of the car as well.
“I couldn’t sleep and didn’t want to wake you, so Dean offered to sit with me, calm me down.”
If oscars were awarded for best lie told, you’re sure you’d be up there in the nominees. It wasn’t necessary to lie to Sam but it beat, “your brother was just fingering me in the back of his car because we never have any time alone away from you.”
“Oh, I’m sorry.” Sam was sincere and his look sympathetic. It allowed for a shred of guilt to be had.
“Why were you looking for us anyway?” Dean interrupted, voice slightly rough and irritated, although Sam didn’t seem to notice.
“I found a case a couple of miles out. Three victims have turned up dead in the last week, all with their hearts missing. Sherif is calling it a vicious animal attack but, i figures we got ourselves a werewolf.”
Silence.
“And that couldn’t wait until morning.” Dean speaks up first. His agitation clear this time.
“Well, technically it is morning. It’s like five A M.” Sam shrugs like it’s nothing and you internally sigh.
“You’re right, we just lost track of time.” You force a smile and ignore Dean’s pointed look as a sudden plan forms in your mind.
“Let us freshen up and maybe you could grab us some coffee and breakfast? You know, since you’re the only one dressed and all.” You ask sweetly, hoping he takes the bait.
“Yeah sure. I was going to grab us all some breakfast anyway.” Sam offers.
Bingo.
“That’d be great, i’m starving.” You exaggerate with a hand on your stomach. In the corner of your eye, Dean gives you a funny look and it takes everything in you not to smirk.
“Okay, well i’ll see you in ten.” Sam says before making his way across the street toward the 24 hour diner.
Wasting no time, you grab Dean’s hand and roughly pull him with you toward the room.
“Woah, what in the-“ You shut him up with your lips roughly pressing to his once you enter the room. His back hitting the closed door with a dull thud.
“If you think i’m going to wait for God knows how long before i feel you inside me again. You’ve got another thing coming.” You explain in a rush as you tug his plain-black t-shirt over his head.
A smirk forms on his lips at your eagerness and Dean has to admit, it turns him on just how desperate you are.
“Oh, i like the way you think sweetheart.”
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You sat in the backseat of baby, irritable, uncomfortable and beyond sexually frustrated.
Your attempt to finish what you and Dean had started back in the room was short lived, when Sam returned only 2 minutes later, having forgotten his wallet.
To say you were in a mood was an understatement. And the permanent scowl on Dean’s face and his white knuckling grip on the steering wheel, told you he was right there with you.
In the end, the three of you figured out who the culprit was, or should you say culprits were, relatively quickly. It was a young man, Johnny Turner who was recently turned, which explained the sloppy kills. And you later discovered the pack who’d turned him, hiding out in a cabin just outside of town.
Overall, it was a successful hunt with minimum injuries and you had prevented a young girl from being the fourth victim. But three people had still died and a young man had to spend his last moments of life as a monster he never wanted to be.
You still remember the fear and confusion in his eyes at what he’d done. But then he’d went to attack you and ended up with three silver bullets from Dean’s gun lodged in his chest.
So, when you climbed into bed that night, Dean following shortly after you as Sam lightly snored away on the bed opposite. There were no wandering hands under the covers, working each other up until you were desperate enough to find yourself back in the back seat of baby. Just silence.
All in all, Sam’s case had inadvertently been another giant cock-block in itself.
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3 Days Later.
It wasn’t your most classiest moment, but you found yourself knelt on a grubby restroom floor; Dean above you with his jeans and boxers pushed down mid thigh as you took his heavy, achingly hard length into your mouth.
You could be ashamed at how horny you were. That you’d stoop so low as to pushing him into a disgusting bathroom stall; dropping to your knees and blowing him right then and there.
But after a whole day of watching him work on Baby, greased up, sweaty and watching his biceps flex as he adjusted loose bolts and nuts under the hood. It was like dangling a piece of meat in-front of a starving dog. You just had to take a bite.
After being unfairly teased all day, you had all ventured to the local dive in town. Of course, Sam came along, actually wanting to join in for once.
Despite your own sexual frustrations, you’d had a good time. Drunk Sam was a lot of fun and it was nice seeing everyone relaxed and with a smile on their face for once.
However, once Sam’s attention was preoccupied by a pretty brunette; and with a strong bout of liquid courage in your system, you’d taken advantage of the situation and summoned Dean to join you in the restroom.
You knew he was just as worked up as you were. You’d felt as much whilst playing a game pool earlier on in the night, when he’d pressed up against you, not so subtly and let you feel just how much the skirt you’d opted to wear turned him on.
So now here you were, sucking off your boyfriend in the restroom stall of a dive bar, like some horny teenager. But if his moans and grunts as he lightly thrusted his hips intime with the bobbing of your head, told you anything. It was that he was more than on board.
Your panties were beyond soaked and uncomfortable but, Dean’s laboured breath’s and flushed cheeks as you looked up at him; his balls drawing up tight in your palm as you let him fuck into your mouth, a tell tail sign he was close, had you doubling your efforts to get him there.
“Holy shit baby. Right there.” He panted as you breathed deeply through your nose and took him as deep as your gag reflex would allow. The hand holding your hair back tightened, bringing with it a sharp sting of pleasure, making you moan around him.
He was seconds away from his release, when a loud bang interrupted you. It was as if an ice-cold bucket of water had been poured over your heads.
Startled, Dean’s slick cock slipped from your lips as you jumped back in shock. The loud bang was shortly followed by a girly giggle and a mans chuckle.
You looked up at Dean, wide eyed and silently asking if he wanted you to continue, when you heard it.
The stall next you rattled as the couple stumbled inside, the sounds of lips lewdly smacking together and then a voice you’d recognise anywhere, instantly cleared your sex hazed fog and had you as dry as a desert.
It was Sam.
You’ve got to be kidding me, Dean’s look told you.
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One week later found the three of you pulling into Bobby’s for some much needed R&R.
After a week of non stop hunts, your bruised and beaten body needed at least a long weekend to recover. And the boys were more than inclined to agree.
As soon as your feet hit the gravel outside of Bobby’s house, you sighed in relief. The drive was long and your back, legs and butt ached from the lengthy position held.
“S’good to see you idgits.” Came the gruff greeting from Bobby as he stepped out the front door. You smiled at the term that had always been more out of endearment rather than as an insult.
You were the first to make your way over and fall into his embrace. Bobby always did give the best hugs. You’d missed him, a lot you realised as he gave you a big squeeze.
Although, your wince had him pulling back immediately to assess you with concern.
“Im all good, it’s just been a long week.” You explained truthfully and though he let it go, you could see he wasn’t fully satisfied with your answer.
“Mind if i grab a shower? I need to get the stink of hours being hot-boxed with the most gassiest man alive off of me.” You jab your finger blindly in Sam’s direction and miss his offended look.
Dean however, barks out a laugh to which Sam throws him his signature bitch-face.
“Hey, she’s not wrong man. S’probably all that rabbit food you eat.” Dean shrugs innocently, but is unable to contain his amusement.
“I’m not going to apologise for eating healthy Dean. Wouldn’t kill you to eat a salad once in a while mister, two double cheese burgers with extra bacon for breakfast.” Sam sasses back, mocking Dean’s gravelly voice. And in doing so, starts the endless bickering between the two brothers.
You decide then to make your escape, passing Bobby with a thankful hand on his shoulder and an apologetic look in your eyes as you make your way inside and upstairs toward the bathroom.
You drop your duffle to the floor and rummage through for some clean clothes. Luckily, you find a faded band t-shirt that you’re pretty sure once belonged to Dean and some leggings. It’ll have to do until you can take advantage of Bobby’s washer and dryer.
You’ll have to cook dinner as a thank you, you decide before peeling off your two day old clothes; grimacing slightly at the pain in your overused muscles and possibly bruised ribs.
You turn on the shower, making sure it’s on the verge of scolding, allowing for a billow of steam to encompass the medium sized bathroom, before stepping into the tub.
At first you flinch at warm spray in contrast to your much cooler skin, but quickly melt under the pressure and warmth seeping deep into your bones.
As you stand motionless, the weight of the last few weeks, possibly months, of being tense, unsatisfied and in pain, gradually releases it’s vice-like grip on you and washes away with the muck and grime accumulated on your skin.
Bliss. Thats what this was. Pure unadulterated bliss.
You’re so enraptured with the feeling, you don’t even notice him enter the room. Nor do you hear the shuffling of clothes being removed, or the curtain pulling back for him to step inside behind you.
It’s not until the coolness of his palms makes contact with your hips, do you startle and turn to meet the vibrant green eyes of your intruder.
“You don’t mind if i join you, do you?” Dean asks. As if you had a choice on the matter, as if you’d ever refuse.
You shake your head in both amusement and in answer to his question, and turn back around as he begins to lather his palms up with the body wash you’d brought with you.
A welcoming fruity smell of strawberries invades your sinuses and you soon hum in pleasure as his large, soapy hands glide across your skin. The act is incredibly intimate without the need to initiate into anything more than Dean simply taking care of you.
However, as his slick hands wander to your front, gliding across your stomach and up to lather your breasts. A fire that had been put out one too many times, reignites within you.
You bite your lip and lay your head back against his shoulder as his hands travel back south. Your breathing grows heavier as his seemingly innocent actions spark you to life.
The feel of his smile against the side of your head, tells you he knows exactly what he’s doing though. So as a form of punishment, you subtly press back against him, smiling devilishly at the feel of his hardening length against your lower back.
His breathing shallows as you slowly gyrate your hips back against him and your pussy throbs in need of something, anything.
The famous saying, ‘great minds think alike’ had never proven more true as Dean’s right hand continues its journey, until two of his thick digits part your wet folds.
You gasp as his middle finger begins to slowly circle your clit, causing an electric jolt of pleasure to course through your entire body.
“You’re so wet already baby.” Dean husks in your ear, just as he briefly dips a finger into your dripping hole before returning the coated digit to your clit.
Adding his forefinger, Dean begins to quicken the pace of his fingers and adds pressure onto the pulsing bundle of nerves, making you cry out and twitch and convulse in his embrace.
He holds you tightly to him by wrapping his other arm around your waist, as you shake and your stance falters, gripping onto the arm wrapped around you like a life line.
“Come for me baby.” You hear him all but growl, before you feel his soft lips begin to nip and suck at the sensitive junction between your neck and shoulder. His fingers are vigorous now and the coil wound tight within in you finally snaps.
Everything goes white; your veins like molten lava, fiery hot and melting your bones as the tremors of your well- overdue orgasm course through you.
“Fuuuck.” You can’t help but moan as your tense body slowly becomes like jelly against the strength of your boyfriend. Dean holds you upright as you slowly come to and only loosens his hold when he knows you’re able to stand on your own.
For a moment you feel like you had died and gone to heaven. Utterly relaxed and boneless, you smile dopily until the numbness fades and the overwhelming need to feel him inside you takes over.
You twist in his embrace and pull his face down to crash your lips to his. It’s messy, all tongue and clashing teeth, both blinded by pure desire and pent up frustrations.
You slide a hand between your bodies and glide your hand up and down his length. He’s hard as a rock and seeping at the tip, which you gather in your palm as you continue to jerk him off.
“Shit.” He pulls away with a hiss, eyes closed tight as he presses his forehead to yours. You bite your lip as you take him in, forever impressed of the beauty that is Dean Winchester.
His hand moves to stop you suddenly and he meets your questioning look with pupils blown wide.
“I’m not gonna last if you keep it up. Need to be inside you now.” He all but growls before sliding his hands under your thighs and lifting you effortlessly into his arms.
You wrap your legs securely around his waist as he pushes you against the tile. The coolness brings out a gasp that’s soon swallowed by Dean’s all consuming, toe curling kiss.
“Please.” You beg as you pull away for a needed breath. Too worked up to vocalise anything else. Dean understands you though and shifts you higher up the wall, using it as leverage as he frees an arm to guide himself into you.
Your eyes cross as he slowly descends you onto his cock. The stretch is both overwhelming and not enough at the same time as he bottoms out. It’s a feeling you’ve missed gravely and he hasn’t even moved yet.
“Holy fuck.” Dean groans deep in his throat at the feel of your tight, warm walls finally wrapped around him. A feeling he’s been starved of for too damn long.
“You feel so good baby.” You praise and cup his cheek to guide his lips back to yours. He slowly slides his way out of you until just his tip remains, before thrusting back in with a sharp snap of his hips.
The action makes you cry out breathlessly, eyes wide in the most painful pleasure. You keep your eyes locked when he does it again, mouth agape in a silent scream with each drag of his length against your sensitive walls.
He builds up a confident rhythm, hitting you in the sweet spot every time, making your toes curl and breathing labour.
“Fuck i’ve missed the feel of you.” You moan particularly loudly when he hits the right spot.
“You’re so tight and wet. Fuck.” Dean groans as he picks up the pace. The sound of skin slapping against skin, almost overshadowing the patter of the showers spray.
You’re close, you can feel it. Feel it in the way your lower belly clenches and limbs tense as your nerve endings spark with each thrust.
Dean’s close too. His panting breaths making way for the odd growl to slip out as he strains with effort to keep you both up. His own limbs starting to flutter in strength at his impending release.
Just as you’re about to loose it, there’s knock on the door, causing Dean to still and you to bite your lip in attempt to stop a frustrated groan.
“Hey Y/N? Have you seen Dean? I need the keys to the impala.” Sam’s muffled voice carried through the door.
Dean looks livid, but you look at him questioning eyes. ‘What do i say?’
It takes a moment, but Deans irritation fades and a sly smirk replaces it.
“I’m in here Sammy!” Dean calls out and your eyes widen in shock. However, you’re unable to say a thing when he shifts his hips, slowly dragging his cock almost all the way out, before pushing just as slowly back in.
Your mouth drops open and eyes flutter as he repeats the action.
“Wait why are you…” Sam trails off and you almost don’t hear his “oh.” Of realisation.
“Might not wanna traumatise yourself Sammy.” Dean calls out, just before he snaps his hips harshly into you again, and you can’t help but cry out. Your cheeks blush at the fact Sam could hear you.
“Dean!” You scold in a hushed whisper, but he doesn’t stop, making you bite your lip to stop from crying out more. Thankfully you hear Sam’s footsteps quickly retreat.
“I’m done with interruptions.” Dean all but growls before crashing his lips to yours. His hips begin to piston into you at an almost bruising, quickly bringing you both back to the brink. Your cries of pleasure muffle against his lips and your hands tangle in his hair harshly, making him moan.
“Fuck i’m going to cum.” You gasp, head thrown back and back arching as much as was possible in the position you were in.
“Let go baby. I’m right there with you.” Dean pants and you meet his eyes in a silent cry as you tense up. Your orgasm rippling through you like a bolt of electricity.
“Fuuuuck.” Dean quickly follows you with a couple more thrusts. His body tensing as he grunts into your neck, each twitch of his cock as he empties his seed deep inside you, sending little aftershocks through your body.
You’re both breathing hard, even when he pulls back to look at you. Dopy smiles rise on your lips simultaneously, and laughter soon follows. Dean slowly puts you down on shaky legs, but keeps you close as he leans down to claim your lips once more.
It’s slow and passionate and striking you back to life as we speak. The smirk on Dean’s lips is all knowing and you want to smack away his smugness, but you can’t find it in you to make on that promise when his wandering hand cups your aching sex.
“Someone’s a needy girl, ain’t they.” He mumbles between kissing his way down your neck as his thick digits stroke you to life.
You gasp at the sensation, torn between too sensitive and desperate to feel more.
You glide your hand up his broad shoulder and through his damp hair before gripping tight enough to make him hiss. His eyes darken lustfully and you smirk a little at the feel of him twitching against you.
“You have no fucking idea.” You whisper, before pulling his lips to yours.
It’s safe to say Bobby’s water bill paid a price that day.
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goofygubegubler · 2 months ago
Text
𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬
You’re trapped with the one person who always gets under your skin. And this time, there’s no escape—just options.
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wc: 4.8k |F!Reader (Intern) x Spencer Reid (BAU) | cw: enemies-to-lovers, mutual pining, locked-room tension, flirty office chaos, bratty reader x repressed Spencer, slow-burn heat, heavy innuendo, power play lite, Gen Z banter, Hotch is so done.
A/n: This is a pick-your-ending fic — at a certain point, you’ll choose between smut or fluff, each in its own post with separate warnings and word counts. If you’re into this format, let me know! It just fits certain stories, y’know? Love and chaos—MWAH 💋
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The BAU was supposed to be a serious, elite unit. You had envisioned it as a whirlwind of case files, high-stakes chases, and brooding men in bulletproof vests. What you hadn’t expected was for it to be filled with this many attractive people—or for the most infuriating one to be Spencer freaking Reid.
He was unbearable. All logic and statistics and that smug little way he corrected people, like a walking, talking Wikipedia page you wanted to shove into a filing cabinet. And, of course, he always had to insert himself at the worst possible moments.
Like now.
You were halfway up the stairs to Hotch’s office, arms full of paperwork, when Spencer materialized beside you, keeping pace effortlessly.
"You look focused," he mused, sipping from his stupid World’s Best Genius mug. The Caltech logo gleamed mockingly under the fluorescent lights.
You ignored him.
"Or frustrated," he added, tilting his head like he was observing something under a microscope. "Maybe both."
Your grip on the files tightened. "Do you ever shut up?"
"I do. Statistically speaking, though, you tend to provoke responses, so the probability of silence is low."
You stopped dead in your tracks, turned to glare at him, and exhaled sharply. "Do you hear yourself when you talk?"
Spencer blinked. "Yes. That’s how hearing works."
Your nails dug into the folder. "I hate you."
"That seems like a misdirected use of emotional energy," he replied smoothly.
You inhaled sharply, clenching your jaw so tightly it could crack. Ah, yes, self-control. A beautiful, fleeting thing. Before you could hurl something at him—your files, your shoe, your entire existence—you flipped your hair with deliberate defiance and kept walking, your heels clicking a little louder than necessary against the steps.
Truth be told, you weren’t just frustrated—you were livid. Not just because of the mountain of paperwork threatening to bury you alive, though that was bad enough. Deadlines loomed, your patience was nonexistent, and apparently, the BAU believed in torturing interns via bureaucracy. But no, the universe wasn’t content with that level of suffering. No, you had to be ovulating, too.
And your body? Oh, your body had decided to make that fact impossible to ignore. Every brush of fabric, every deep inhale around a particularly nice-smelling coworker—hell, even the way Derek Morgan smiled at people was suddenly a personal attack. And then, as if the gods of humiliation weren’t done with you, there was Spencer Reid.
Unbearably smug. Infuriatingly brilliant. And, much to your horror, the hottest of them all. It was an objective fact, but one you would sooner choke on a case file than admit.
You stomped into Hotch’s office like a woman on a mission, dropping the stack of paperwork onto his desk with a satisfying thud.
Hotch barely glanced up. "Not so easy."
You groaned. "Hotch, please."
"All intern paperwork has to be proofread and signed by a superior agent," he said, sliding the files right back toward you without even looking.
You narrowed your eyes. "You didn't even check."
Hotch finally glanced up, unimpressed. "You think I don't know when something’s unfinished? The weight is off. The stack isn’t dense enough. And if that weren’t enough, you wouldn’t have dropped it like it burned you."
You inhaled sharply, then exhaled through your nose like a bull about to charge. "I know, but every time I try, they’re too busy, and besides, Hotch, you know me—"
"Reid’s not busy," Hotch cut in. "He does paperwork the fastest. Morgan even pays him to do his, not that I officially acknowledge that particular rule-breaking."
Your soul left your body. "You cannot be serious."
"It wasn’t a question." His expression remained unreadable, but you swore there was amusement in his eyes. "Reid is your assigned agent from now on."
Your hands are clenched at your sides. "Hotch, you don’t understand. That’s cruel. That’s a human rights violation. That’s—"
"Efficient," he interrupted smoothly. "And unavoidable. Unless, of course, you’d rather I reassign you to Rossi. He loves a good mentoring opportunity, and I hear he enjoys dictation."
Your mouth snapped shut. That was how he won. Every. Single. Time. He had a way of shutting you up with a perfectly placed, completely infuriating threat that left you with no choice but to storm out with whatever dignity you had left. You inhaled, exhaled, and bit back the thousand things you wanted to say.
But, of course, Hotch wasn’t done. He leaned back slightly, fixing you with that assessing stare that made your spine straighten. "And," he added, "we talked about the skirts."
You smirked, tilting your head, letting your inner party girl out for just a second. "Yeah, yeah, you’re required to say that, but let’s be real—HR only cares if it’s disruptive, and last I checked, no one’s tripped and fallen into a scandal because of my legs."
Hotch’s lips pressed into a flat line, his patience visibly thinning. "I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that."
You grinned, victorious. "Good choice, bossman."
His stare didn’t waver. "Leave."
And because you valued your job (and, fine, maybe because getting the last word on Aaron Hotchner was a dangerous game), you spun on your heel and strutted out, thoroughly pleased with yourself.
God, if you didn’t have a massive, wildly inappropriate crush on Spencer, you’d bounce on Hotch in a heartbeat. Even if he was divorced. Even if he had a kid. Even if he was old enough to be your father. Domineering, dangerously competent men were simply your type, and unfortunately, you were surrounded by them.
As you made your way back to your desk, you let yourself fantasize—just a little. Maybe, in another life, you could have both. A little Eiffel Tower moment, if you will—
"Hey, you in?"
Penelope’s voice pulled you from your wildly inappropriate thoughts. You blinked, turning to her just as she plopped down in the chair beside you. "In?"
"For going out tonight. Drinks, dancing, chaos—our usual."
You hesitated, your attention snagged by movement across the bullpen. Hotch stood by Spencer’s desk, speaking in that low, measured tone of his. Spencer, ever the picture of unbothered intellect, nodded along, his fingers idly drumming against a case file. Hotch’s brow furrowed, and something about the intensity of his gaze made your stomach twist.
"Okay, now I know you’re distracted." Penelope snapped her fingers in front of your face, making you jolt. "What’s got you zoning out like a lovesick teenager?"
You tore your gaze away and cleared your throat. "Hotch just told me I have to start running my paperwork through Spencer."
Penelope’s eyes widened. "Oof. Condolences. What did you do to deserve that?"
"Apparently, Hotch thinks I’m not cutting the ropes as a newbie," you deadpanned. "But he likes me otherwise, y’know."
Penelope snorted. "Oh, sweetheart. That is the most delusional thing I’ve ever heard—and I’ve been in a fandom war."
Before you could respond, movement caught your eye. Hotch and Spencer were walking toward you, Hotch balancing a precarious stack of files in his arms. You barely had time to brace yourself before he stopped beside Penelope, giving her a pointed look.
"Garcia. Back to work."
Penelope pouted dramatically. "Ugh, you are such a buzzkill, you know that?"
"And yet, here I am, still insisting," Hotch replied dryly. He barely glanced at her. "Garcia. Work."
Penelope gasped, clutching her chest like he’d personally wounded her. "Rude. And here I was, ready to offer my radiant presence for a night of fun. But nooo, crushed by the oppressive fist of bureaucracy once again." With a theatrical sigh, she stood, smoothing out her skirt. "Fine, fine, I’m going. But if my sparkle dims, Hotchner, just know it’s on your conscience."
"And yet, somehow, the world survives," Hotch replied flatly. Then, without another word, he plopped a massive stack of files onto your lap. "You and Reid need to redo this entire stack before you leave."
"Oh, fantastic," you drawled, shifting the weight of the folders in your arms. "Because nothing gets me hotter than redoing paperwork with my favorite human encyclopedia."
"That’s between you and HR," Hotch deadpanned before turning on his heel and walking away.
You scowled after him. "I hate this place."
"And yet, you continue to show up," Spencer mused, already pulling a file from the stack in your hands. "Let’s see how much damage you’ve done this time."
"Oh, bite me," you shot back, dropping the rest of the files onto your desk with a dramatic sigh. "Before you start spewing unsolicited critiques, just know that I put my heart and soul into those."
Spencer flipped through a few pages, his lips twitching. "You used gel pens again."
"So?"
"So, it smudged everywhere."
You rolled your eyes. "Forgive me for wanting my bureaucratic misery to sparkle a little."
"And your phrasing," he continued, ignoring your defense. "This is meant to be objective. What is ‘a concerning amount of eyebrow waggling’ supposed to quantify exactly?"
"It means the guy was sketchy!"
Spencer gave you a long, suffering look. "You are the worst intern in FBI history."
You smirked, tilting your head just enough to be insufferable. "Aw, Doctor, you say that like it’s a bad thing."
Spencer just exhaled through his nose and turned back to the files, flipping a page with unnecessary force. "If we ever have to testify based on your notes, the jury’s going to think we’re making it up."
"Oh, please," you scoffed, leaning back in your chair. "Eyebrow waggling is a known intimidation tactic."
"According to whom?"
"Me. Obviously."
Spencer pinched the bridge of his nose, muttering something about the downfall of modern law enforcement before refocusing on the paperwork. The clock on the wall ticked steadily, marking the slow exodus of the office. First, Morgan and Emily strolled out, offering half-hearted goodbyes that suggested they were thrilled not to be stuck with this nightmare. Then JJ, then Rossi—each departure leaving the bullpen quieter, the fluorescent lights humming louder.
By 6:30, even Penelope had fled, but not before dramatically sighing, "Ugh, this is so unfair! We were supposed to have a girls' night. Or at least get you drunk enough to make some questionable decisions!"
"Oh, trust me, I am questioning every decision that led me here," you deadpanned, glaring at the endless stack of papers.
Pen just pouted. "Well, hurry up and get it done so we can still salvage the night! I have snacks, face masks, and enough gossip to fill an entire season of reality TV."
"Maybe if someone would stop talking, we could actually finish this," Spencer cut in, not even looking up from his work.
The clock ticked on, relentless and unsympathetic. 7:15. Then 7:45. Then, somehow, 8:30. The bullpen had long since emptied, the low murmur of voices replaced with nothing but the scratch of pens and the faint hum of fluorescent lights.
And, of course, the sound of your own pulse hammering in your ears every time he shifted, every time he exhaled a little too sharply. The air between you crackled with something neither of you would dare acknowledge—something electric, infuriating, and impossible to ignore. Spencer was always irritating, but tonight, the sharp edges of his voice sent heat straight to your spine. His rolled-up sleeves, the furrow in his brow, the way his fingers tapped impatiently against the desk—it was too much. And he had no idea.
You shifted in your chair, pressing your thighs together, as another agonizing minute crawled by. The warmth pooling deep in your stomach was getting harder to ignore, bleeding into every impatient twitch of your fingers, every sharp inhale you tried to steady. It was making you reckless. Every movement he made—every flicker of irritation tightening his jaw, every absent tap of his fingers against the desk—sent another unwanted jolt through your system.
And you were nowhere near done.
You propped your chin in your palm, elbow sinking into the desk, twirling a pen between your fingers in a half-hearted attempt at distraction. But the numbers on the page swam uselessly in and out of focus, blurring into meaningless symbols. How were you supposed to concentrate when the biggest source of your frustration was sitting just feet away—close enough to feel, close enough to rile you up with nothing more than his presence?
Spencer’s voice was sharp, his presence sharper, and despite the fact that you supposedly couldn’t stand him, your body clearly hadn’t gotten the memo. You were existing in a frustrating limbo—exhaustion pressing at your skull, attraction setting fire to your nerves. Your skin felt too hot, too tight, hypersensitive to every minute movement across the desk. You could feel the weight of his eyes even when he wasn’t looking at you. If you weren’t careful, this night was about to get a whole lot longer in more ways than one.
It took exactly one sharp exhale from across the desk for your tenuous grasp on focus to fully snap. Spencer, who had been nothing but an irritatingly efficient machine for the past two hours, finally looked up. And oh, he was irritated. The pen in his hand hit the desk with a clatter, and he leveled you with something caught between exasperation and begrudging patience.
“Are you even paying attention?”
You blinked slowly, head tilting. “Hmm?”
Spencer sighed, dragging a hand through his already slightly tousled hair. “Your lack of attention to detail has ensured that we need the regional case file, not this—a duplicate copy.” He gestured at the offending document like it had personally insulted him. “Which means, thanks to this mistake, we need the actual original file.”
You stretched your arms over your head, arching your back slightly just for the principle of it all. His eyes flickered downward before snapping back up, his jaw tightening, but you pretended not to notice.
“And?”
“And,” Spencer said tightly, voice teetering on the edge of patience, “Garcia’s already gone for the night, so we can’t just pull it from the digital archives. That means I have to go to the file room and physically retrieve it.”
You raised an eyebrow, lazily dragging your gaze back to him. "Cool. Have fun."
His expression darkened. "The file room is in the basement."
“Sounds like a you problem.”
His jaw flexed. "The file room is on sublevel two—buried under concrete, terrible ventilation, not a single camera, and if that door shuts behind you? You're stuck until someone remembers to check."
You blinked at him, unimpressed. "So, what I’m hearing is: a perfect setting for a horror movie."
Spencer's lips pressed into a thin line. "It’s a security feature."
"It’s an oversight. The FBI, an organization that prides itself on preparedness, has a room where someone could just get stuck until an unsuspecting soul wanders down there?"
He exhaled, slow and measured. "Yes."
You grinned. "That’s insane."
Spencer, to no one’s surprise, did not grin back. "That’s protocol."
You sighed dramatically, leaning back in your chair, stretching deliberately slow. His gaze flickered downward for the briefest second before he forcibly dragged his eyes back to your face. Oh, he noticed. And that little detail sent something devious curling inside you.
“Well, since you’re the one so concerned with protocol, go get the file."
His stare was unimpressed. "You made the mistake. You go."
You scoffed. "Oh, please. If I hadn’t made a mistake, you’d have found another reason to be insufferable. You were just waiting for an excuse."
Spencer inhaled sharply, like he was holding something back. "That’s not true."
You smirked. "No? Then what was that little lecture just now? Don’t tell me you just enjoy talking down to me. That’s kind of kinky, Doctor."
His fingers flexed against the desk, a telltale sign of irritation but also something else. His voice came out quieter, a touch too taut. “The file name is ACB-714. Basement archives, second cabinet on the left."
You gave him a lazy salute. “Consider it handled."
Truthfully, you needed an excuse to step away. The way he’d spoken to you—sharp, clipped, just on the edge of losing control—had sent your brain spiraling into places you did not need to be right now. It was bad enough working alongside him when your body was already betraying you, but the fact that he sounded that good when he was frustrated was unbelievable. Unnecessary. Unfair.
And the way he looked at you? Like he was barely keeping himself in check? Like he was two seconds from saying something neither of you could take back? That was dangerous.
You pushed back from your desk, the sharp click of your heels against the tile the only indication of certainty when everything inside you was anything but. Maybe the basement’s clinical chill would help, its walls lined with forgotten case files and the ghosts of bureaucratic neglect grounding you back into something solid. Maybe the hum of the fluorescents, cold and impersonal, would smother the slow, insidious heat crawling beneath your skin—the heat fed by too many lingering glances, too many tension-laced arguments that never seemed to resolve.
The door groaned as you stepped inside, its weight swinging shut behind you with an eerie finality, unnoticed in your distraction. The file room stretched ahead, a silent graveyard of paperwork, thick with dust and the acrid bite of industrial-strength cleaner. Overhead, the fluorescents flickered erratically, their jittery glow casting restless shadows against the endless rows of filing cabinets standing like sentinels in the dim light.
Your mission was simple—retrieve one file, ACB-714, and get out. But the second you stepped into the file room, your focus was already shot to hell.
Spencer Reid was ruining your life.
Okay, maybe that was dramatic, but at the very least, he was ruining your concentration. He had rattled off instructions with that sharp, impatient cadence, his fingers pressing into the bridge of his nose like he was physically restraining himself from strangling you. The worst part? It wasn't just the irritation that got to you. It was the way he watched you, the way he always seemed locked in on you, even in exasperation.
You wanted to be annoyed. You wanted to let it roll off your back. But your body betrayed you, heat curling at the base of your spine in a way that was neither productive nor appropriate for a professional setting.
Your fingertips skimmed over the metal cabinet labels, your eyes skimming but not really seeing. Was he always like this? So insufferably exacting? So unwilling to let anything slide? It wasn’t just the way he corrected you—it was how he did it. Precise and controlled, like he knew exactly how to get under your skin and lived for it.
It was honestly impressive.
You blew out a breath, pushing your hair out of your face as you rolled your shoulders back. Focus. Find the file. Get out. But instead, you leaned lazily against a filing cabinet, barely noticing how the movement nudged the doorstop at the threshold.
The sharp click of metal shifting barely registered before it was too late.
Your stomach dropped.
The door.
Oh, you had to be kidding.
Panic didn’t hit immediately. No, it crept in slow, slinking up your spine like a cold hand tracing your vertebrae. You turned on your heel, already knowing what you’d see before you even reached for the handle.
Locked.
Of course it was fucking locked. Because why wouldn’t the government’s precious archive room operate like a goddamn haunted house? You stared at the heavy metal door, willing it to magically swing back open. It didn’t.
Your hand flew to your face, pinching the bridge of your nose as you exhaled. This was just perfect. You had let your brain wander off into Spencer Reid–induced nonsense, and now you were locked in an FBI basement because you couldn’t be bothered to properly secure a doorstop.
And you weren’t just trapped. You were trapped while ovulating, which meant your body was already in a state of desperate, hormone-fueled hysteria. Which meant you had spent the last fifteen minutes alternating between rolling your eyes at Spencer’s condescending attitude and staring at his hands. His long, unnecessarily pretty hands, which had absolutely no business looking that good while shuffling through case files.
Great. Now you were locked in a basement, overthinking, and horny.
You slid down against the filing cabinet with a groan, head thumping back against the metal. How long would it take for someone to notice? Would Penelope come looking for you, or would she just assume you finally gave in and quit? Maybe Spencer would realize something was off. Maybe he’d put the pieces together, retrace your steps, and...
No. No way. If anything, he’d think you were just slacking off. He’d probably roll his eyes, make some condescending remark about how you were the worst intern in FBI history, and move on with his night. Because that’s what he did—he got under your skin, poked and prodded and found every little thing that made you tick.
And the worst part? You let him.
You sighed, staring up at the ceiling, determined to push him out of your head.
Then, just as you started to resign yourself to a long, embarrassing night of solitude, a noise broke through the thick silence.
Footsteps. Slow. Purposeful.
Then—finally—the sound of the door handle turning.
The door swung open, and there he was, framed by the dim hallway light, looking every bit as exasperated as you knew he would. His gaze flicked over you, arms crossed, mouth already pulling into a disapproving frown.
"Unbelievable," he muttered, stepping inside with an exasperated shake of his head. "You, of all people, got yourself locked in a room that explicitly warns you not to let the door close behind you. I even told you."
You scoffed, pushing up from the floor. "Wow, Spence. So good to see you, too. Did you miss me?"
"Not particularly," he deadpanned, but his eyes betrayed him, lingering on you for half a second too long. Then, with the same distracted precision he applied to everything, he grabbed the doorstop and wedged it beneath the heavy metal frame.
"There. Now, let's get—"
The sharp, metallic click of the door lock echoed through the room.
Silence.
Spencer froze.
You blinked.
Then, slowly, terribly, you turned to face each other.
"Reid," you started, voice calm in a way that meant you were absolutely about to lose it. "Did you just—"
"No," he said immediately, but his voice had gone slightly higher. "No, I didn't."
Your arms crossed, mirroring his stance. "Then what was that noise, genius?"
Spencer inhaled sharply through his nose, then reached for the handle, twisting it once, twice, then yanking with just enough force to confirm the worst.
Locked.
You stared at him. He stared at you.
"You," you said, pointing an accusatory finger. "Just locked us both in."
He opened his mouth, then shut it, jaw tightening. "Technically—"
"Oh, no. No, technically, Spencer. You just pulled a me."
His eyes narrowed. "Pulled a you? I think not."
"Oh, I think so!" You threw your arms up. "Because last I checked, I was the one who got us into this mess and you were supposed to be the responsible one!"
Spencer let out a long breath, adjusting his stance like he was physically restraining himself from escalating. "Okay, well, panicking isn’t going to fix anything."
"Who’s panicking? I’m not panicking." You were definitely panicking. Not because you were locked in—no, you could handle that. But because it meant you were stuck here. Alone. With Spencer. For God knows how long.
And you were already on edge.
Already warm, restless, caught in some ridiculous hormone-induced haze that had made your brain hyperfocus on things you had no business noticing. Like the way Spencer’s shirt sleeves were pushed up, revealing the lean, tense muscles of his forearms. Or how his hair was just slightly mussed, like he’d been running his hands through it in frustration. Or the way he smelled—like old books and something subtly sharp, like cedarwood and coffee grounds.
God, you needed to get out of here.
"This is your fault," you muttered, pacing a tight circle.
"Oh, so it’s my fault you got distracted and let the door close on you?" His voice had that smug edge again, laced with something else—something almost amused, like he’d warned you this would happen and was now relishing in being right. It made you whirl on him, irritation flaring hot beneath your skin.
"Yes, actually! If you hadn't been hovering over me like some insufferable know-it-all, I wouldn't have lost my train of thought."
Spencer scoffed. "Hovering? I was doing my job. You were the one lost in your own head, probably thinking about something ridiculous like—I don’t know—lip gloss flavors or whatever occupies that overly cluttered brain of yours."
You gasped, shoving at his chest. "Oh, bite me, Doctor Condescension! Not all of us have an eidetic memory to store every single useless fact known to man. Some of us have normal human brains that get distracted when we’re trying to multitask!"
Spencer barely budged from your shove, but the corner of his mouth twitched like he was fighting a smirk. "Right. Multitasking. You mean twirling your pen and zoning out?"
You opened your mouth, ready to snap back, but the reality of the situation hit you again like a truck. The file room. Locked. No way out. You groaned, dragging your hands down your face.
"Okay, genius, how do we get out? Since you're so brilliant and never make mistakes?"
Spencer crossed his arms, the smugness practically radiating off of him. "We wait. Someone will come looking."
You threw up your hands. "Oh, great! Because getting caught in a locked basement with you is exactly how I wanted to end my night."
He rolled his eyes. "You act like this is some unbearable torture."
"It is!" You gestured wildly. "I could be out right now, drinking with Penelope, having a girls' night, doing literally anything else but this! But no, I’m stuck in here with you, arguing over whose fault this is when we both know it’s yours."
Spencer let out a sharp breath, tilting his head. "You’re exhausting."
"You’re infuriating!"
"You’re impossible."
"You—" You jabbed a finger into his chest. "—are the bane of my existence!"
"And yet," he said, voice dropping just enough to send something shivering down your spine, "you can’t seem to stop talking to me."
You faltered for half a second before scoffing. "Oh, please, don’t flatter yourself. If I had any other option, I wouldn’t waste my breath on you."
Spencer stepped closer, his presence suddenly suffocating in the small, stale room. "Funny. Because despite all your complaining, you never actually walk away."
Your heart slammed against your ribs. This was new. This was dangerous. The air shifted, tension curling like a live wire between you, and you hated that some deep, embarrassing part of you liked it. Too much.
You swallowed, forcing out a breathless laugh. "What, and let you think you’ve won? Not a chance."
Spencer studied you, his gaze flickering down to your lips so fast you might have imagined it. Then, just as quickly, he scoffed, a deliberate shift in his expression that screamed of warning more than dismissal. "See? Impossible. I told you."
Something inside you snapped. Maybe it was the stress. Maybe it was the sheer absurdity of this situation. Maybe it was the fact that you were ovulating, and his stupid smug face was the only thing in your line of sight. But before you could even process the words spilling from your lips, you blurted out, "God, I hate how much I like you."
The silence that followed was deafening. You barely even registered what you’d said at first, not until Spencer’s entire expression shifted—his usual composure cracking just enough to reveal something startled, something unguarded. His lips parted slightly, his breath hitching just enough for you to catch it.
And then, like a freight train hitting you at full speed, the realization crashed down.
You panicked. "I mean—not like like, obviously. Just, you know, tolerate. Barely. In a work acquaintance kind of way. Like an annoying gnat I’ve learned to ignore, except I can’t ignore you because you never shut up, and—"
Spencer surged forward and kissed you.
The force of it backed you against the filing cabinets, steel biting into your spine as his hands found your waist, gripping just hard enough to steal whatever breath you had left. It wasn’t soft. It wasn’t gentle. It was months of pent-up frustration, sharp and heated and all-consuming.
You barely had time to process it before you were kissing him back, fingers tangling in his shirt like you needed something to hold onto. Like letting go meant losing whatever the hell this was.
Spencer pulled back just enough to murmur against your lips, "Shut up, for once."
You would’ve argued. You really would have. But then he kissed you again, and suddenly, there was nothing left to say.
PICK YOUR ENDING
➤ [Ending 1 – Smut]
➤ [Ending 2 – Fluff]
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gigiwritess · 10 days ago
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BACK TO EARTH
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dr. jack abbott x f!resident!reader!vega aka "wildcard"
wc: 2,100 synopsis: the weeks go by—until the pittfest happens. jack wasn't even supposed to be working, but there he was. he didn't expect to have to save vega from herself, too, as her personal dark spiraled out of her control.
contents: 20-year age gap (vega is 26, jack is 46). vega's worsening mental health issues; she's having an anxiety attack, but it's not heavily described. usual pitt dynamics. probably lots of medical inaccuracies that i'm not gonna apologize for. this is totally self-inserted and vega is totally based in lots of aspects of myself. this list is concerns general warnings and specific chapter warnings—i'm gonna keep updating it as i go
gigi's notes: hi people!!!! i'm sorry for not posting the 3rd piece sooner. besides work, classes, organizing and academic conference, my depression keeps getting the best of me and i dissociate and don't do all the shit i need to do and it's an endless cycle. so it took me a bit longer to be able to flesh it out exactly how i wanted this to go and to find the right voice for the things i wanted to write. i really loved this piece and i hope you like it to. i'll try my best to write the next one sooner <3 about the 'jack abbot x reader x frank langdon love triangle', i can tell she's here and she's called TRAITOR (based on the song TRAITOR by elley duhé). i'm nowhere near finished but i'm already at 3k soooo it might take a bit longer to finish cooking it. i should probably make a list of jack abbot's works in progress because i have many lol i'm also gonna write jack abbot x firefighter!reader bc it's my alter-ego, probably a mini-series shorter than BRIGHTER, and i'm also thinking of somethinng like jack abbot x brat!reader in nessa barrett's vibes. as you can tell, jack abbot is rotting my brain :()
PLAYLIST | NAVIGATION | MASTERLIST
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There was something wrong.
The worst of the Pittfest chaos had passed. The ER wasn’t quiet—it never was—, but now the screaming had dulled down to murmurs, the steady beep of machines, the last critical cases being dealt with. Even though it wasn’t over, there was finally a small semblance of quiet starting to spread.
Jack was hands-deep in a tracheotomy when it happened—a kid. Couldn’t have been older than ten. Vega had been working on him since he arrived; Jack caught a glimpse of her across the room as she stopped her compressions and called time of death. He saw the way she stilled for a second, the way something in her eyes cracked. She didn’t lose it, didn’t panic, didn’t break protocol. Just took a deep breath and moved on. But he saw the look in her eyes. He knew that look.
He knew, the moment she stepped out of Trauma Two, her shoulders sagging, her hands shaking as she pulled the latex gloves off with far more force than necessary, there was something wrong.
The beeping from the monitor finally went back to a steady rhythm; his patient was stable. Jack could finally breathe normally again; no one else was calling out his name to go help another patient. He ripped off his gloves, shoved a blood-soaked gown into a bin, and wiped the sweat from the back of his neck. By the time his patient was finally handed off, Vega was gone.
He probably shouldn’t have been paying that much attention to her all this time working together, but he couldn’t help it—he was, by nature, an observant person; he had thrived in workplaces exactly because of that. But Vega was the biggest mystery Jack had ever faced—the most fascinating one.
Every time they worked together or were near each other—which happened way more frequently than it should’ve, considering they worked opposing shifts—, he noticed something about her, sometimes without even meaning to.
It was almost as if she were a giant magnet and he was made of iron (part of him was, at least). He noticed the way her forehead would furrow whenever she was in deep thinking; he noticed the way she would let a quiet groan escape when stretching her back, always a grimace of pain she was quick to disguise when there were people around. He noticed how picky she was with her fingers, always scratching something, filing her nails, finding something to fix in her cuticles. He noticed how expressive she was; how her face always showed what she was feeling, even when she was trying to pretend otherwise.
He noticed a lot of things about her. Especially how well she held herself together, but her eyes gave her away—he always saw right through them.
It took him longer than it should’ve to find her. She wasn’t in the break room, wasn’t in the stairwell. Not in the far supply closet that staff usually went to scream into empty shelves, not in the ambulance bay.
It was one of the old, near-empty trauma bays, half-lit, curtain drawn. Vega sat on the edge of a gurney, knees close to her chest, elbows on her knees. Her hands were covering her face, her palms pressed against her eyes as if she could absorb back her own tears.
Jack didn’t announce himself. He just stepped inside, quietly closed the door behind him, pulling the curtain shut. For a moment, he just stood there. The room felt too small, the air too heavy.
“Vega?” He called out in a low voice, rough from a long, chaotic day.
No response—she didn’t move. He could hear her small, soft sobs.
He crossed the room in two strides, invading her space, her knees touching his chest. Carefully, gently, Jack took her hands in his and slowly pulled them away from her face, her eyes, wet with tears, sealed shut as he lowered her hands to her sides.
“Look at me,” Jack said, both his hands coming to cup her face, firm and steady, warm palms against the sides of her neck.
She did. Her eyes, usually so full of fire and life, were dark, red-rimmed, almost vacant as they met his. It was as if an angry, destructive storm had passed through them, taking everything in its wake, taking a piece of her with it. A storm that had been hidden deep, brewing for some time—not just the Pittfest.
“Breathe.” Quietly, she did. “In and out.”
Her breathing hitched, the tears subsiding, the tremor in her chest slowly fading away. His thumbs brushed the sharp line of her cheekbones—not soft, not tender. Grounding. Just enough to tether her back to Earth, back to the present, away from her spiraling thoughts, back to him.
“Good girl,” he muttered as her breath came in shaky but obedient, almost even now.
It was meant to come out as a tease, something for her to laugh, to bring her back to reality. But it didn’t sound that way, not as she shivered, not as his thumb grazed the corner of her mouth. Not as her gaze fell to his lips once, twice before flicking back to his eyes. It shouldn’t have made his stomach twist—but it did. They stayed that way for a moment, just breathing, just looking at each other, existing in each other’s space. Simply being with each other, her pulse a steady rhythm against his fingers.
But his eyes betrayed him—his gaze dropped to her lips before he could stop himself. Maybe it was the tiredness. Maybe it was the blood stuck under his nails, or the way his chest still ached from all the patients he’d lost. Or maybe it was the way that here, in this room, right now, with her, none of it mattered.
Jack leaned in—Vega met him halfway. It wasn’t a careful kiss, not sweet. It was like a collision of exhaustion and adrenaline, and months of looking at each other as if they were two souls who knew something about each other, who recognized something in each other. Her hands gripped the collar of his scrubs, his palms sliding to the back of her neck—it was a kiss meant to ground them both. Hard and a little desperate, meant to translate everything that couldn’t be said yet. No promises, no words, no soft confessions. Just here, right now.
When they pulled apart, their foreheads stood almost touching for a moment. Jack’s breath was ragged; his hands still cupped her face.
“Keep looking at me like that, old man,” she said, voice hoarse, “and I might start thinking you like having me around.”
The wicked smirk on her lips, swollen from his kiss, was the first real thing he’d seen on her face all night.
It took a moment for her teasing to hit its mark, for him to realize she was back. “Yeah, yeah,” he laughed. “Don’t let it get to your head.”
Jack was the first to pull back, hands falling away slowly, reluctantly. The air between them still crackled, was still charged as they stared at each other for a moment longer, the memory and the weight of the kiss too fresh, too sharp. For a second, neither of them spoke.
Outside, someone faintly asked about more negative O units—the world hadn’t stopped.
He jerked his chin toward the toward.
“Come on, Wildcard,” he said, the usual sharp-edged version of him settling back into place, “you’ve got a shift to finish.”
There was something about the way he uttered ‘Wildcard’. It was not in the usual teasing, mocking way people did. It felt personal—he spoke it like a secret kept between just the two of them.
She slid off the gurney, her hand brushing his as she walked, her pinkie tangling with his for a single moment before she put distance between them. Her expression was the same as it always was—cool, a little cocky, composed. But her pulse was still visible at her throat.
Jack noticed. Of course he did.
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The world was calmer now as they sat down on the park benches, Matteo happily handing beers to whomever would accept. Life still went on around them—music thudding faintly against the night air, sirens going off in the distance—but here it felt quieter. Slower.
Vega looked up; the night sky was clear and bright, stars twinkling faintly. Jack sat beside her on the same worn-out bench. He was sitting close, almost too close. His thigh brushed hers, solid and warm; his arm bumped hers when he shifted slightly to accommodate his prosthetic leg, but he didn’t move away. If anything, he leaned closer, the barest tilt of his body, casual enough that no one would notice.
She noticed—every single second. She could’ve inched away, could’ve created a little space. She didn’t.
They hadn’t spoken since leaving that trauma bay, hadn’t worked together—only traded stolen glances throughout the ER, glances full of everything they didn’t recognize yet.
“You held up good today,” Jack said, nudging her leg with his left knee, beer in hand, “better than most.” He angled his body towards her, looking at her profile.
She nudged his leg back, turning her head to look at him, finding his eyes. “Even with a breakdown?”
“Even then,” he said, sipping his beer and staring intently into her.
Vega tried to play it off, act cool—but her throat still tightened all the same as she held his gaze, as she tried not to think about the anxiety black hole she’d just barely clawed her way out of. She tried not to think about how everything had been spiraling each time worse than the previous, each time getting far out of her control, until his warm, steady hands pulled her out. She didn’t want to think about how grounding his touch felt—or how his kiss felt like a lifeline she didn’t know she needed, how his kiss felt like being above the surface after being underwater for so long, how his kiss felt like feeling a spark of something after being numb for so long.
But that was all she could think about as she looked into his eyes, as the world seemed to narrow down to just the two of them under the amber streetlights.
She looked away; her heart sounded stupidly loud in her ears, overwhelming. She took a breath, trying to quiet it down.
“You don’t have to babysit me,” she said, breaking the moment, pretending like it didn’t weigh heavily on her chest. “But thank you.”
“I know,” Jack said after a beat, a half-smirk ghosting across his mouth. “Guess I just have a thing for trouble.”
Vega let out a breath of a laugh, genuine, small, and surprised, meant just for him. Something warm started to spread over her chest, something good. When she turned to him again, her eyes were brighter, crinkling just a little at the corners. She shouldn’t say anything—or at least say something else. But she couldn’t help it when his eyes had a spark of something daring, of something dangerous, something familiar.
“Yeah? That why you keep hanging around?”
The air between them went still. Heavy, charged. Like something coiled and tense, just waiting for someone to make a move—any move.
Feeling just a bit emboldened by the spark in his eyes, she reached out and snagged the beer right out of his hand. Jack’s eyebrows shot up, surprised, but he let her do it, watching as she lifted it to her lips and took a long sip. Brave. Almost defiant.
Vega handed the beer back. Eyes still locked on Jack’s hazel ones, his fingers closed around hers, slow, deliberate, and his head tipped toward her, just a bit, like he was going to say something to Robby instead—he didn’t.
Jack’s mouth brushed near her ear, low enough that only she caught it, meant just for her.
“Careful, kid. Keep that up and I’ll think you’re flirting.”
It was her turn to stay silent, her breath caught like a deer caught in a trap, just for a split second before she masked it into a tiny, sly smile. Her cheeks, her whole face, felt like it was on fire. She didn’t need to look at him to feel the wicked grin tugging at his mouth.
Vega leaned back against the bench, purposefully pressing her shoulder against his. She said nothing as she stole his beer again, brushing his fingers—and he let her—, acting as if her heart was beating normally. It wasn’t. Not since his kiss brought her back to earth.
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