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whateverisbeautiful · 1 month

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♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#29: The Malfunction (1.04)

gif cred: @kimwexlersponytail

From the first three TOWL episodes, it was clear that Rick had been dealing with a lot of inner turmoil. But in the following conversation with Michonne, we see just how much damage has been done in the years he's been isolated. Because even when given an out to break free, Rick still won't go home with the woman he knows he needs like he needs air - and that right there lets you know the temp controller was right to declare a malfunction...

So after Rick hilariously gets riled up by the technology in this apartment, he’s ready to air out some grievances of his own.

gif cred: @nat111love

He turns to Michonne and says, “I told you not to show them who you are. And you break the kill record. You grab the R-DIM from Thorne and nearly get yourself killed.”

gif cred: @nat111love

And I love Michonne’s little ☹️ face when he’s talking.

gif cred: @nat111love

I was like Rick, we and Michonne don’t give a damn about the CRM after she just told you that you have a son.

Like are we really talking about the R-DIM and not RJ right now?

But CRM talk is how Rick deflects from the real issues.

And then sounding truly shaken Rick addresses how Michonne is making it a bit challenging to achieve his goal of keeping her alive when she's pulling them out of helicopters.

gif cred: @nat111love

Homeboy is understandably still recovering from that helicopter plunge lol. But also, an A is gonna do what an A is gonna do so he should’ve known Michonne was going to A it up and somehow take matters into her own hands.

gif cred: @nat111love

And then Michonne let’s him know why she did this when she approaches him and passionately says, “That’s because I don’t like who you are with them. What they make you. It isn’t you.”

gif cred: @nat111love

I like that she says ‘it isn’t you’ because she knows him so well and she knows that what Rick has become isn’t true to himself.

And I always appreciate the way Michonne doesn’t lose sight of the fact that the CRM is responsible for what Rick is now, whereas Rick seems to think he’s the one to blame for the shell of a person he’s become.

gif cred: @nat111love

Rick somberly says, “You think I want this?” Which makes me sad and also it’s interesting how he keeps saying “you think.” It matters to him that Michonne knows this outcome is not at all something he wanted or that he didn’t want to be with her.

The tech voice chimes in again and says, “Your preferred temperature has been reached.” I love that it chimes in here saying this after Richonne really did just get a whole bunch off their chest in their heated argument.

Michonne silently looks at Rick with teary eyes. She knows he didn't want this CRM life, but she also knows he's still refusing to go for what he actually wants which is being home with her.

gif cred: @nat111love

So then Michonne walks away very visibly frustrated as she hits one of the items in the apartment. Rick finally switches up his approach a bit more to old Rick when he softly says, “Are you gonna give it to me?”

Michonne turns around shaking her head at all this as she says, “So what? We just let them win?” (Side note: I love the rain in the background it really sets the mood. The earth cries when Richonne fights, ijs 😌)

Rick takes a breath and looks down as he shows a moment of pained vulnerability and says, “Look at me. They won a long time ago. They won the day Jadis brought me here.” And as he says this you can really sense just how defeated Rick is. 😢

He’s lost all belief in himself and I feel like the scars, the one hand, the CRM gear, it’s like he looks at all that and sees reminders of how the CRM won against him as well as seeing it as how he sacrificed his life to save his family. He just wasn’t expecting that family to also show up and try to save him. And what he has to see is that Michonne doesn’t and would never look at him and see the failure he thinks he is.

This is Michonne’s first time learning that trifling Jadis was behind Rick’s disappearance all those years ago so she says, “She brought you?” And then she quickly puts it together saying, “She was working for them wasn’t she.” Rick says, “With them” and I wonder if he corrects it that way because he’s clarifying that Jadis was way more hands-on in this than just being another worker.

gif cred: @perryabbott

Rick finally gets to tell Michonne what happened after the bridge explosion when he says, “She was running away from Alexandria. She saw me half dead at the riverbank.” Then he finally tells Michonne about what prompted his switch up from 'we’ll get away together' to just trying to get Michonne home when he says, “She will destroy our home if I try to leave. I was making her let you go. I got that much out of her.”

It’s crazy this isn’t even the first time Rick had to make a deal with a villain regarding Michonne. But as we see the difference between the Governor deal and this Jadis deal is now Rick truly wouldn’t even consider for a second trading Michonne’s safety for anything. He’ll do whatever to ensure she’s okay, including painfully being apart from her.

Michonne asks, “You want me to go?” And while it’s a very different context it reminds me of when Rick said the same to Michonne in my favorite TWD Richonne moment from 9.03. And both times they know the answer is no. I think Michonne asks this here because she’s like 'As long as you don’t want me to go then we can take on anything else.' What Rick wants is more important to Michonne than what Jadis or the CRM has going on.

And then I absolutely love the delivery when Rick so sincerely says, “I want you to live.” He means that with everything in him and he not only wants it - as we’ll learn by the end of the ep, he needs her to live.

gif cred: @andy-clutterbuck

The problem is he’s become so one-track-minded about it, that all he can focus on is keeping her alive instead of really seeing her and letting it sink in that she’s with him right now. But also I just love the way he says he wants her to live because it’s so clear that she’s who he’d do anything to protect. Again, he’s just struggling to realize that he’s who she’d do anything to protect too.

The face he makes before he says I want you to live - it’s evident that her leaving is the last thing he wants. You can tell the idea of her leaving is heartbreaking to him, especially after the pain of having gone without her all these years, but again, he’ll break his own heart 1000 times if it means keeping her safe.

Michonne is quiet as she looks into Rick’s eyes and then Rick shares, “She’s threatened by us because together, you and me, she thinks we can do anything.” And knowing that’s the only thing Jadis has ever been right about, Michonne assuredly says, “We can.” And again I love Michonne's belief in them.

I especially have to keep reminding myself that it’s still only been a few days since Rick and Michonne have been reunited. Like being in each other's presence is still so fresh but despite how much they’ve gone through apart and how much they’ve changed as individuals, Michonne still knows she and Rick are an unstoppable duo together.

gif cred: @perryabbott

She says, “We can stop her.” And the tears in her eyes. 😭 You can feel how much she wants Rick to remember they can take on anyone and anything that's keeping their family apart. It’s always so visible how deeply Richonne feels about each other which is why they so badly want to figure this out.

Rick says, “You saw what happened to your friends. It will happen to everyone we know.” And first, let me just say that I love that they’re trying to communicate despite feeling so much and being on separate pages. Like this fight they're having with each other is also one of the ways they’re fighting for each other.

And then I adore hearing Rick say, “To our children. Our son.” 😭 It’s his first time verbally acknowledging their son RJ specifically and the breathy way he says it you can tell that while he has a wall up, the news of his son is still very much on his mind and means something immense to him.

Even just saying the words ‘our son’ aloud carried weight to him and I love that we’ve arrived at a point where Rick is mentioning his son with Michonne. 🥲 As much as Rick tries it for the first half of this episode, one thing I do really appreciate is that the second he learns about RJ, his son is fully included in who he has to fight for and protect. He loves him already. 🥹

I love seeing Richonne have this conversation as parents of their kids. This is our first time hearing Rick refer to Judith as their child too so I’m just here for it all the way. 🙌🏽

Michonne says, “If we get to Alexandria first…” But Rick doesn’t think that’s realistic as he interjects with, “Hide everyone we know? If we get there in time. You want to risk that?” It’s interesting the first thing he thinks they’d have to do is hide and be on defense rather than be on offense about it.

gif cred: @clonecaptains

Then Michonne is speaking my language when she says, “We kill her then. Should have done that in the beginning.” Truer words have never been spoken, y'all. 💯 And I'm glad that Michonne is willing and ready to take that evil lady out. Had me like...

Rick explains why that won’t work either when he says, “She left it all behind - who we are, where we’re from - so people will find us if we did that.” I love that they’re still a 'we.' And you can see in Rick’s sad eyes that he really feels there is no way out of this for him and he’s convinced himself that going home together just isn’t on the table.

Rick looks at her for a moment and then says, “Please just give me the PRB.” He knows that all he can do is ask and say please because you know he would never just try to grab it from her.

Michonne glares at him and walks away and I think part of her is frustrated that Rick so immediately wants to turn to pressing the PRB to 'solve' their problems without at least trying another option with her. Michonne asks him why all the BS because I’m sure she’s wondering why Rick was doing the most at the CRM to evade having to tell her all this context he’s just now giving her.

gif cred: @taiturner

Rick says, “I had to get you out.” And you can tell again that he’s just so convinced that what he’s doing is what’s best for her and what he has to do as someone who feels in every way meant to protect her. And I like how he walks toward her (cuz 🧲 ) and so they can still have this fight face-to-face. Again, I don’t think Rick would keep on in a fight like this in his previous relationship but in his marriage with Michonne, he can’t help but stay in it and try to explain.

And honestly, I'd bet Michonne is also more expressive in this relationship than in her previous one too. Like she’s allowing herself to feel the full extent of what she’s feeling and vocalize it and I love to see it. Again, it’s the biggest breath of fresh air seeing Michonne’s emotions and feelings be a focus. Reason number one million why I’ll forever applaud Danai for this episode. 👏🏽💐

Michonne then says, “To lie? To leave that note and think I would just leave. Me?” I’m glad she asked that because she’s like 'now Rick, I know you know me better than that.' No matter how long it’s been, he knows Michonne wouldn't just leave him behind.

Rick says, “Both of us couldn’t go home. Would you have gone if I told you?” And she wouldn’t have. But still, if he told her the truth, she’d help devise some sort of a plan together and they’d figure out how to go home like Richonne always does so he should have told her.

The way Rick’s voice stays going up a few octaves in this fight. Poor guy is going through it. 🥺 And he’s putting Michonne through it too which needs to stop. 🥺 (Side note: This whole marital fight is so good and raw and even when at odds I’m just sitting here watching them thinking look at my babies, they even fight attractively lol 😋)

Michonne knows she wouldn’t have gone if he told her so, being willing to draw up a new plan, she calmly offers up a solution saying, “Okay. We go back. We find her evidence. We destroy it. We kill her. And then we go home.” Sounds like a plan to me. 💁🏽‍♀️

I like how Michonne is like no matter what the plan is, killing Jadis stays a part of it. I’m with her all the way. 👏🏽

I know Michonne knows this mission can’t be deemed a success until they’re back with their babies and so they have to get home no matter what. Rick is silent and visibly anxious and this is the first indicator of the ep that tells you there’s a lot more keeping Rick stuck than just the threat of others.

Like Michonne is willing to accommodate him and even go back with the dreaded CRM, and her plan could be their way out - but it’s risky, and even more, it’ll mean Rick potentially has to experience losing Michonne again which killed him the first time.

It’s interesting how Rick's trauma has formed in a way that makes him more focused on how having her again means losing her again. I love the way they explore that this episode.

Again, Danai said we aren’t doing surfacey trauma, we’re going to really dive into the deeply damaging toll that what these characters have been through would take. And to her I forever say...

When Rick is silent, Michonne can sense his apprehension and she asks, “Do you think we can do anything? Because I do.” Aw this moment. It’s so sweet and so sad. 🥺

It's sweet because again Michonne believes in them like no other and trusts that after everything they’ve been through there’s nothing they can’t do. But then it’s sad because it also feels like right now she’s believing in them alone since Rick is now convinced they’re no match for the CRM.

Rick is again silent and shaken and so Michonne asks, “What did they do to you?” I know a lot of thought was put into the dialogue this episode which made me put a lot of thought into reflecting on the significance of the wording choices. And something I really like in this episode is how Michonne always brings it back to this idea that the CRM did something, they took something. She knows this is not Rick’s doing like he thinks it is.

And I like how when wording things this way she slowly but surely frees Rick up to realize that rather than think he’s done something wrong - something wrong has been done to him. And if it’s been done it can be undone. Like when it comes to undoing the damage the CRM did to Rick, Michonne knows...

I also just really like how this two-character episode is between two soulmates who have a long-established interconnection which means Michonne can sense something far deeper going on with Rick even if he’s not outright saying it. And when she asks 'What did they do to you?' it feels like it’s her searching for that deeper truth she knows and can feel has a hold on him.

Rick just quietly says, “We need to go back.” He’s stuck on that. And Michonne blinks and asks, “...And after that?” Rick is so fixated on this route and so Michonne's question is her trying to gauge if this is really him saying they just don’t even try and then go their separate ways when they go back.

Rick stays looking down, silent, and my heart breaks into a million pieces when Michonne then has an emotional smile and asks, “Do you still love me?” Y'all, it makes me want to shed a tear every time. 😭😭😭

gif cred: @nat111love

Like the way she vulnerably says it knowing it’s one of the most painful things to even have to wonder but she’s trying to smile almost as though trying to let him know he can be honest if that’s the case. 🥺

I know in almost 8 years of being apart and being as in love as ever with him, Michonne probably never once wondered if Rick still loved her. But I think after all this out-of-character behavior from him it had to cross her mind as a possible reason why he could push her away this much when the Rick she knew would never do these things.

It kills me to see Michonne like this. 💔 I’m sad it had to get to the point of her even asking him this question and bracing for the answer. And I really do see Michonne the woman, human being, and wife in this moment. Like for years she’s had to operate first and foremost as a mom and community leader but here she’s just a woman who needs reassurance that the love of her life still loves her. 😢

It’s also interesting that she asks this even despite Rick having said 'I love you' a couple times in letters and in words since they've reunited. It just goes to show that Michonne is an actions-person and so while the words are nice she also knows the actions have been as she’ll say later - not how Rick loves.

The one good thing is that Michonne does not have to sit with this question for long because Rick is quick to reassure her when he steps towards her, looks right in her eyes and whispers, “Always.” 😭

gif cred: @nat111love

I love that that’s how he responds because it’s not just saying ‘yes’ it’s saying ‘always yes’ - past, present, future, he always loves her. 🥹And then he makes it even better by sincerely letting her know, “I’ve never stopped loving you.” 🥲

I’m very glad he said that and so quickly because despite being silent for a while in this scene, this is one thing he is eager to dispel her doubts about. You can tell that the one thing that’s most intolerable to him is making Michonne think any of his actions are coming from a lack of love.

Like he can have her thinking everything they have is broken but not that he doesn’t love her because in fact for the last few years, all he’s been is love for her. It’s the only emotion he even still has intact since he’s been living while dead. He's adamant that she knows the ‘I love you forever’ part of that getaway boat note was 100% true.

gif cred: @msanonships

Rick’s eyes have never lied to Michonne. Even if he tries to she can look right in his eyes and know he’s still in there and he’s still longing to be with her regardless of what’s currently keeping them apart

And not to get too ahead just yet, but all I’ll say is I do get why Michonne mentions the toll this “back and forth” is taking on her later in the ep because Rick's inner turmoil really is causing some whiplash. One moment he’s saying it’s over and another moment he’s saying with the utmost sincerity that he’ll always love her and has never stopped loving her. It's a lot of emotions to put Michonne through. However, I am glad that it’s always crystal clear in Rick's face which one he really means.

And when he says he never stopped loving her, he means that. Michonne knows he means it too and I love the way she looks in his eyes hearing this and even more, believing this. They are both so extremely good at conveying how much they love each other in just their eyes alone. 😍

gif cred: @ricksmarlene

The way Michonne looks at Rick here just clearly communicates that she’s never stopped loving him either. I love when they pan out too and we can see that they’re holding each other. I knew those magnets in them were gonna start getting their way eventually lol.

And it’s just so sweet and tender that even after the yelling and the disagreeing and the hurt that still all needs to be addressed, they can still find themselves in this position looking at each other with all the love in the world.

gif cred: @nat111love

So then, choosing to trust and defer to Rick yet again, Michonne slowly hands him the PRB. That’s a big deal. One; because Michonne wouldn’t just surrender to something like this for anyone.

But also two; because what this is essentially doing is agreeing to let Rick call the CRM and potentially move forward with him and her going separate ways. That has to be so painful to nearly agree to but she’s willing to meet Rick where he’s at because I think when she looks in his eyes she truly does trust that he’s trying to do what’s best for them because of how much he loves her.

gif cred: @taiturner

As soon as Rick has the PRB a new development occurs. Rick and Michonne look out the window and see that their helicopter crashed into a building during the storm. Now is the universe a Richonner or is the universe a Richonner? 😋

Rick says, “That’s our helicopter. You saved our lives.” See Michonne may be crazy but she is also always right. Amen. 😇 And I like how Rick immediately gives Michonne credit for saving their lives. Even in a fight, he’s gonna give his wife her flowers. 💐

Michonne is elated by what this implies for them as she says, “It’s gone. So we’re gone.” Rick says, “yeah” in a way that doesn’t sound nearly as relieved by that thought.

But also I like that he does respond to her by saying yeah because, while it’s such a small detail, something I’ve always noted in these posts is how Richonne stays verbally acknowledging each other's words even with just a yeah to affirm. Hence why it was so jarring when Rick had no verbal acknowledgment about their son, initially. Again, watching that whole RJ reveal moment...

Michonne turns to Rick with her pretty smile and says, “Jadis will think we died in there. They all will.” And Rick is again silent and hesitant so Michonne says, “Rick?” And then unable to look her in the eye, Rick looks down and just says, “No.”

It’s wild enough hearing Rick say an outright no to Michonne because he usually avoids that but especially regarding this - finally having a way to go home together. I’m telling you the way Michonne is looking at him is the same way I was looking at him cuz what???

gif cred: @figmentof

Michonne softly asks, “What did you say?” And then Rick just rocks us all when he says, “I’m not going home.” And if it wasn’t obvious that there has been some serious damage done to Rick Grimes since he’s been away all these years this moment right here made it ultra clear.

He has an out to go home and be with the woman he needs to live and his baby girl and the young son he dreamt about and has never met and he's not taking the opportunity - that lets you know something is seriously wrong. Like...

Another thing I applaud Danai for is how she had to write a Rick Grimes that is acting out of character while still feeling like the character. She did that very well and Andy played it phenomenally too. 👏🏽

The scene ends with Michonne looking right at Rick as he can’t bring himself to make full eye contact, instead looking down and defeated. This riveting sequence made me very curious to see what was really going on with Rick because we now know it’s not just the CRM keeping Rick in chains but some far deeper internal imprisonment beneath the surface.

And fortunately, it will all get explored excellently as the episode progresses. 😌👌🏽

#richonne #towl #reveling in richonne #1.04 #RIR (29)#the ones who live #twd towl #michonne grimes #rick grimes #rick x michonne #twol #michonne #rick and michonne #twd: the ones who live #twd #richonnefandom

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callmelola111 · 1 year

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guilty conscience ☆ part four

← part 1 , part 2 , part 3 ⭑ part 5 →

synopsis: it’s your first year at college and you’re 1,500 miles away from home. you’d feel completely alone if it wasn't for your attractive roommate ellie. will this attraction complicate the already uncharted territory? or will she be the answer to all your problems?

|✯| pairing & wc: college!ellie williams x roommate!reader. wc: 3.2k

|✯| cw (by part): 18+ themes (MDNI), fem reader, SMUT (18+ ONLY), modern au!ellie, HEAVY ANGST, frequent swearing, sexual tension, cat lol, fingering (r receiving), oral (r recieving), kinda nipple play, dom!ellie, sub!reader, public-ish sex, ellie is a cheater cheater pumpkin eater (i think thats it but lmk if i missed anything)

a/n: honestly was getting fed up with myself writing this part. like goddamn bitch can we get a happy ending already? so much angst and drama from ellie that you might just wanna beat her tf up. it gets so slutty though and i love it. i hope this is feeds the ache for y'all, lmk cause this is my first attempt at smut!! anyways, thanks 4 the support and much love from me to you <;3

After that special night with Ellie, you realized there was no more ignoring the situation at hand. She left you feeling empty just as quick as she had made you feel full. And you cared so much for her, despite the fact. No matter how much you wanted to stand your ground, your mind always got stuck on the possibilities. The possibility that Ellie was feeling everything you were… The possibility that there was a happy ending in sight… The possibility that Cat meant nothing.

With all these feelings circling your mind, you felt too biased to make the right decision when it came to her. You decided it was time to tell Dina. You quickly picked up your phone and gave her a call, inviting her out to coffee. Thankfully Dina offered to drive, as you were still stranded at Ellie’s bandmates place. 10 minutes later, she was out front honking.

Dina greeted you with a squeal, “Hiii love!! I missed you!”

Before you could reciprocate her greeting she spoke again, “Wait who’s house is this? How was last night? Oh my god Y/n, did you hook up with someone?? Pleaseee tell me!!” Dina’s thoughts were going 100 mph trying to guess the context of this little rendezvous.

“That’s why I asked you to coffee. Trust me, I’m going to explain everything.” Your mysterious answer left Dina even more intrigued. The both of you arrived at the coffee shop, ordered your drinks, and took a seat at a little table in the corner.

“Soooo… TELL ME ALREADY,” Dina exclaimed impatiently as you fidgeted in your seat not even sure where to start. You stared through the shop window at nothing in particular as you mulled over the timeline of Ellie and you. Dina could see the cogs in your brain turning and knew this conversation was going to be about more than a silly little one night stand. You finally spoke 3 words, “it’s about Ellie.”

“Ellie? God I should’ve known, I’m literally your best friend!!”

“It's fine D, I’ve been pretty radio silent about my love life on purpose. See, it’s much more complicated. Like a gut wrenching, sick and twisted, WLW heartbreak kind of complicated. How long can you stay and talk?”

“I’m all yours babe, give me every last detail. I'm serious,” Dina urged. So, you did. The debrief took a total of 3 hours and 2 iced coffees to get through. It felt so good getting everything off your chest.

Dina gave you just the right advice too, “Communication is key.” You knew it was stupid but talking about it upfront was the last thing you had thought to do. It seemed too scary to face Ellie like that, but you knew it was the right choice. Sure it was hard dealing with these feelings and you wanted answers, but you also lived with this girl. You owed it to yourself and to her to figure out this bullshit. You didn’t want to be in a constant state of tension and resentment every time the two of you had to be around each other (which was all the time).

After a morning well spent, you and Dina said your goodbyes and she dropped you back off at your dorm. You walked through the front doors and swiped your student ID to access the elevator. You leaned against the cold, metal walls as you brainstormed how to approach Ellie. You had a good idea of what to say up until you were opening the door and coming face to face with her. She made you forget everything. But, despite your blank mind, you were determined.

“Ellie, we need to talk, seriously.” You tried to assert yourself, but your breaths were shaky from nerves. Ellie looked up from her desk nonchalantly and gave you a blank stare like she had no idea what you were talking about. This really pissed you off.

“Don’t give me that fucking look Ellie, you know exactly what I’m talking about. How could you just leave me like that?”

“Hey relax, it’s not like that.” she stood up and answered calmly, which made you want to slap her even more. Ellie could put on a game face better than she could ever be vulnerable. No matter the damage her lack of honesty caused.

“It’s not like that? Be real with yourself for one fucking second Ellie.”

“Fuck you bro, I don’t need this shit.” she retaliated, not meaning a word she spat out.

“FUCK YOU!” you shouted, moving into her space. Instead of moving back, Ellie stayed right there with you, standing her ground. You felt the heat of her body against yours and an erotic sensation growing between your legs. Your eyes began to glaze over with tears of desperation, she had this unexplained power over you.

“Ellie, I- I can’t keep doing this with you.”

“Can’t keep doing what?” she asked. It’s like Ellie needed you to admit it first before she could even acknowledge it on her own. She longed to hear your passionate confessions and anguished pleas.

“I can’t keep beating around the bush with you. I like you Ellie and it’s driving me fucking crazy because you act like you could care less. You taunt me with your stupid sexy charm and stupid flirty touch just to run right back to Cat. But right here, right now, you can’t deny the tension between us. I need you Ellie.” Tears began to stream down your face and you wiped them away with haste. A beat of loud silence echoed through the room before Ellie finally answered.

“I don’t mean to tease, but there’s just so much at stake when it comes to me and you. Can't you see? I know I’m a piece of shit. I mean, here I am with a perfectly fine girlfriend, yet inches away from my roommate, hardly able to resist her touch.”

“Then don't Ellie. Forget about everyone and please just kiss me.” You were practically begging, it was so pitiful. Ellie placed a hand to your shoulder and shoved you against the wall.

“God Y/n just STOP IT!”

You melted under her agonizing touch, “W-why not me?” You stuttered and took in her hot breaths that hit your face as she panted through her frustration. It wasn’t much longer till the two of you could no longer restrain.

Ellie stared at her dirty converse to avoid your pleading eyes, “I just can’t, I can’t cheat. I'm not a cheater.” She was shaking her head profusely as if to rid her mind of the lustful thoughts that consumed her. She wanted you so bad it hurt. You took her face in your hands and lifted her gaze to yours in a last attempt.

“Ellie-,” you gasped, as the aching became unbearable. You’d surrender to her touch right now if she only asked. As Ellie looked back at you, she wished Cat didn’t exist, you were all she ever wanted and you were right there. She just had to say the words and you’d be hers.

Ellie’s head fell into the crook of your neck in desperation. Her hands moved up and down your clothed body searching for some sort of release.

“Ellie please, I need you.” you whimpered into her ear. The vibrations sent a shiver of pleasure down her spine and just like that she snapped. All her morals disappeared as she found your wrist and grasped it firmly, leading your hand to the waistband of your pants.

She whispered back, “show me.” With her permission your hand darted down to the ache. You slid your fingers through the mess Ellie invoked with just her words before stopping on the big ball of nerves that begged to be touched.

Before you could ease the yearning down below, Ellie interrupts, “I said show me.” A smirk grew upon her face as she watched you discern the meaning of her risky comment. You retrieved your fingers in obedience to Ellie and were prepared to do whatever else she asked.

Immediately, Ellie took your sticky fingers and brought them to her plump lips. Slowly she planted kisses from the tips of your digits down to your knuckles. It felt like a dream. Of course, Ellie knew she should stop, but when her freckled nose caught the sweet smell of your juices she dreamed of tasting them too.

“Put your hands back in your pants.” she demanded with agency. Back inside they went, fingers quick to locate your empty hole. You couldn’t take it, your middle finger gently slid in and a breath escaped your open mouth. You shut your eyes and an in-and-out rhythm ensued. Ellie grew wet herself as she watched you writhe with pleasure. She couldn’t help but tell you.

“I love watching you touch yourself like that.” Her comment evoked a strained moan from your lips as you imagined her fingers inside instead of your own. Ellie cupped her cunt, trying to fight her infidelity but failing miserably.

“Can I see your fingers again please? I- I wanna taste it.”

“Need me that bad?” you teased, like you hadn’t been dreaming of this moment for ages. But Ellie had no time for games and took matters into her own hands. She captured your fingers herself. Her tongue flattened to the length of them before her mouth completely closed in on the treat. She sucked with vigor until your flavor dissipated.

“Tastes so good” she hummed, eyes blown out with pleasure.

“How about you really taste it?” you taunted. The twisted and erotic nature of the interaction left you in a trance.

“You know I can’t Y/n. It- It would be wrong.” Ellie spoke as if sucking your roommates slick right off her fingers wasn’t just as much of a betrayal as any sexual act. At this point morals felt so out of the question but your words from nights before continued to repeat in her head.

“Me? Mess it up for you? Don’t worry Ellie, you can do that all on your own, believe me.”

She was at odds with herself, not knowing whether to dive in head first or run away while she could.

“Please Ellie, I need you inside me.” you begged. She brushed the back of her hand down your face apologetically and planted a kiss on your forehead.

A single tear fell as she said, “I just can’t do this. I have to go,” and turned towards the door. Ellie disappeared out of the room and you sunk to the floor, defeated once more. I guess old habits really do die hard.

After Ellie left, she didn’t show back up to your dorm for the next 3 days. At first you were pissed off and hurt, but the longer she was gone, the more that bitterness turned into worry. She became the only thing on your mind. You had tried calling and texting but to no avail. Out of desperation, you even decided to ask Cat in class. Dina supervised from afar as you confronted her.

“Cat, I know you don’t like me, but can I please just ask you something,” you said with hesitance.

“Great observation! You’re right, I don’t like you. Now, what do you want?” she snapped.

“It’s about Ellie, I haven't seen her in 3 days and I’m really worried. Do you know where she is?” Cat paused to think before she gave you an answer.

“She’s been staying at my place. Is there a problem? I mean, I am her girlfriend,” she scoffed. Truthfully, Cat hadn’t seen Ellie for the past 3 days either but God forbid she let you find that out. She didn’t want you thinking you had any sort of chance with her girlfriend now that she seemed to be getting iced out too.

Of course, her plan worked just how she wanted and you were just about ready to give up on Ellie. You walked back to your dorm dragging your feet hopelessly. When you arrived you were greeted by none other than the girl who’d been fueling your worry.

“Ellie? What the fuck. What are you doing here?”

“I mean, I live here right?” she answered while rummaging through her things. Here she goes again, pissing you off like usual.

“I thought you did too until you went awol for 3 whole days without saying a thing. If you wanna stay with Cat that bad just tell me. I don’t need you sparing my feelings. You’ve already done enough.” Your anger spoke for you and Ellie was baffled.

“Cat? What makes you say that? I’ve been at my parents this whole time.”

You snapped, “Don't lie to me Ellie, I know you were at her place. If you love Cat so much, just be with her and leave me the fuck alone.” Ellie then grabbed her guitar and slinged on a backpack.

“Fine, I will leave you alone. I have a show to be at anyways.” And just like that, gone again.

You replayed the past hour in your head and considered the fact that maybe Ellie was telling the truth. Cat was never known to be a saint, so her lying all of the sudden seemed likely. This time, instead of waiting for Ellie to come back around, you decided to chase after her.

You quickly threw on a revenge outfit and put on some mascara. You stared in the mirror at your black mini skirt and tight crop top. You couldn’t deny it, you looked fucking hot. The peak in confidence pushed you right out the door and to the venue of Ellie’s show.

When you arrived her band was already on stage playing. You realized this was your first time ever hearing them together and decided to really soak it in. Ellie looked so happy doing what she loved despite all the drama happening off stage. She was even better than you thought. You watched as she plucked the strings and bobbed her head along with the beat. You hated how much it turned you on. The tattoo you loved so much was on full display and her arm muscles flexed with each chord. She’d occasionally bite her bottom lip in concentration and it drove you wild. Her set finally finished and you were more than pleased, mentally and physically. Ellie got off stage and you quickly ran after, shouting her name.

“Hey can we talk please? I wanna say sorry.” you explained.

“Fine, come with me to the bathroom, it’s quieter there.” She grabbed your hand and led you. You pushed yourself up to sit on the marble counters that housed the sinks. Ellie looked you up and down, waiting for you to speak. She took note of how good you looked before frantically spewing an apology.

“I’m sorry for accusing you of lying. I was stupid and asked Cat if she had seen you recently. Of course she told me you’d been with her and I blindly believed.”

She seemed to be listening so you continued your ranting, “I really hate to fight Els. I miss having fun with you. I wanna move on from everything and just be happy. Together, me and you.” You looked up to flash her some puppy dog eyes when you noticed her attention being diverted.

No matter how hard Ellie wanted to pay attention to what you had to say, she couldn’t help but stare up your skirt. Your positioning on the counter gave her the perfect sneak peek of the space between your legs. Once you had caught on to her pervy behavior Ellie fumbled to save face.

“Shit sorry um, I was just, uh, you have cute panties.” She then flashed you a sideways smile trying to make up for that dumpster fire of a “save”.

“You don’t have to apologize, Els.” A cocky look spread across your face and Ellie recognized what game you were playing.

“Well then I’d just like to say, the wet spot on them is even cuter.” Your face turned hot as you registered the fact that the same girl who made you soak through your panties was about to be the one to take them off.

Ellie slotted herself between your knees as you sat on the counter. Shock turned to hunger in a matter of seconds as you practically consumed each other. Her mouth engulfed yours as if there was no need for air. You desperately clung to her body, using your legs to pull in closer. Ellie grabbed at your chest as she slipped her wet tongue into your desperate kiss. You gasped into her mouth when she found your nipples through the thin fabric of your top. She twisted them with power before removing your shirt completely. Ellie separated from your mouth for just a split second to admire the beauty before her.

“You’re fucking gorgeous,” she gushed and then used both hands to push your legs apart. Your cunt was on full display through the soaked fabric, your skirt bunched up around your hips. Ellie used her calloused fingers to trace the delicate folds peeking from the cloth and you jolted as she brushed past your sensitive spot. She hooked into your panties to scootch the fabric to the side before you suddenly interrupted.

“Ellieeee, we’re in a public bathroom.” She pouted at you with desperation. Ellie needed you now. Out of pure impulse, she grabbed you by the hips, hands cupping your ass, and stumbled with you into the big stall.

“Take them off” she demanded. You seductively slipped the pink, lace thong you were wearing down to your ankles. The cold air alone on your exposed folds was enough to send a sensation through your body. Ellie retrieved your littered painties and shoved them into her pocket for “safe keeping”. She remained on her knees in the tight bathroom stall and began planting kisses on your inner thighs. These kisses turned into small bites as the shared arousal became overwhelming to your senses.

Ellie eventually found her way to right where you wanted her. Her fingers spread you apart taking mental note of each delicate fold. You gasped in pleasure, as if to urge her to continue. The wet sensation of her tongue finally met your aching clit and a sultry moan escaped your lips. Your opening clenched at the contact as she coached you through the bliss that was her mouth.

“I know it feels good but you gotta be quiet for me baby. Just breathe.” You had barely gotten the hang of keeping calm before her fingers dove in to give you twice as much satisfaction.

You gripped Ellie’s forearm for support as she twisted in and out of your throbbing cunt. She was determined to make you feel good. She needed to make up for her bad behavior.

With that thought in mind, she dove back in with her mouth followed by the curling of her fingers inside you. You couldn’t help but screech and Ellie quickly shot a hand up to cover your mouth. So goddamn noisy. As she continued, you inched closer and closer to the precipice of an orgasm.

The bathroom brimmed with the wet sounds of Ellie’s tongue lapping you up, her fingers assaulting your hole, and the moans she did her best to muffle. But, suddenly, those weren’t the only sounds that filled the room.

“Ellie? Baby, is that you?”

← masterlist ⭑ part 5 →

taglist ☆...

@machetegirl109 @gold-dustwomxn @menatoia @ximtiredx @robinismywifee @elliepricefield @alexpritch @jokirxmae

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dodorimo · 3 months

Text

something old, something new - part 2

continuation to this. Raphtav. 1.6k

Raphael actually appears here. Car sex ensues.

AO3 link

· · ────── ❊ ────── · ·

“Can we expect little ones soon?”

The coffee spews out of her mouth in a perfect arch. For an instant, she must’ve looked like one of those tacky, fish-like water fountains you often see in gardens.

Did Astarion wait until she took a big sip so she would make an even bigger mess? The bastard.

Tav quickly assesses the damage. Her new clothes have been spared, thankfully. The same couldn’t be said for the restaurant's table.

Their shopping spree had been a success. Somewhere along the way, Astarion convinced her she was in dire need of new jewelry, which brought up the matter of her complete lack of proper beachwear, and so on. There were almost too many bags to carry, all of them were from different brands: Hermès, Tiffany, Dior, Sephora (that last one was a little self-indulgence of hers).

“We’ve too much on our plate to worry about kids,” she said, grabbing a napkin to clean up her mess.

Raphael as a father? Hell would first freeze over.

“When you say ‘we’ do you mean ‘we both individually’ or ‘we’ as in ‘I don’t want it’?” He emphasizes his point by making quotation marks with his fingers. “With how quickly he put a ring on it, you’d think he’s plugging you full every night.”

And there goes the last sip of her coffee. Out of her mouth.

The lewd picture he conjured aside, she had to disagree that it was really that fast. Four months of dating is a perfectly reasonable amount of time for people over 30. Right? … Right?

“‘We’ as in ‘we’ have no vocation to be parents.”

“Hm. A shame.” Astarion makes a face. “Some would argue you two are too pretty for your union not to bear fruit,” he says and takes a bite off his ice cream… A bite. With his teeth. She’s pretty sure this is the first time she’s seen anyone do that.

“What’s your excuse?” she deflected. “You should’ve an army of nose-pickers by now.”

That managed to shut him up.

She seizes the opportunity to lazily scroll through her social media feed. All afternoon, she and Astarion joked about all the ways Raphael would get back on her for her (presumably) dress transgression. They had plenty of ideas: he would send her a text (signed with his initials, as he usually does), then come pick her up in his limo to give her a ‘stern talking to’. All meaningless jest, of course. With no basis in reality. None.

That's why when the notification pops up on her screen, she thinks it's her mind playing tricks on her. But the more she stares at it, the less likely it is to go away.

[17h14] ❤︎ Million Dollar Man ❤︎ said: I’m outside - R

“Guess you're going to have to hitch a ride on your own now.” She tilts her phone so Astarion can read the message too. “Mine just arrived.”

Astarion sends her a look over his silver-rimmed sunglasses. He doesn’t seem fazed. “Oh my. Speak of the devil.”

They say their goodbyes (and in his case, good luck) and then she’s off to search for her fiancée. It doesn’t take long. In fact, it doesn’t take time at all. Parked at the front of the street and taking up most of the space is a black limousine.

Why the limousine today and not one of his many sports cars? She would’ve more luck making sense of a physics problem.

The car takes off the moment she gets in. She holds on to her seat to keep from tipping over. Gods, she forgot how fast those things were.

She remembers her first ride. The giddy smile on her face. Do you see me now, mother? It seems almost banal now.

Sitting across from her, Raphael is a sight worthy of a magazine cover. He’s dressed in a three-piece black suit today, with a burgundy tie and a golden watch on his wrist.

In other words, he’s looking every inch the filthy rich man he is.

Tav almost feels bad about her waist-high jeans and loose ponytail. Almost.

“You have coffee on your shirt,” are his first words to her.

And, just like that, all her goodwill goes out the window. She tactfully adjusts her hair so it covers the offending stain. “Hello to you too,” she mumbles.

Something is plaguing him today. His fingers drum on his thigh in a frantic staccato. Whatever he wanted to say to her, he didn’t like it at all. Thankfully, she finds out soon enough.

“I need a plus one for today’s inauguration party.”

“But I thought that was…”

“Taken care of?” He waves a dismissive hand. “So did I. Change of plans. Out of my control.” Annoyance reduced his usual flowery language to a series of short sentences. That bad, huh.

Today is her day off. He’s in big trouble.

“You’ll be thoroughly rewarded.” This is the closest he’d come to pleading with her.

The effort is good enough. She nods, a small smile playing on her lips.

Raphael lets out a sigh and it's as if the weight of the world has been lifted from his shoulders. She’s still staring at him expectantly, though. Was that really all?

“So… you didn’t come for the dress?”

For some reason, he found this hilarious. “Why? Is there something you wish to tell me, my dear?”

She doesn’t have to answer. The car slows down; they’ve arrived at their destination. His penthouse, by the looks of it. The one on the main street, to be more specific.

“Daniella will brief you on the details when you get there.” The mirth he showed earlier is gone. He’s all business now.

“You’re not staying?”

“I have other matters to attend to before the party. I’ll meet you there.” He moves to open the door.

“Wait.” She holds his wrist and looks at him in the eye, hoping her pouty lips and pleading gaze would convey her meaning.

Fortunately for her, it does.

Raphael tastes like whiskey and freshly picked cherries. The kiss starts slowly, a mere touch of lips, before evolving into something more intense, passionate. She gets lost in him, in the feeling of his body pressing against hers and his hand cupping her breast.

He pulls away suddenly. He almost seems angry at her, with his ragged breath and furrowed brow. She hears the door closing with a soft click.

“Ten minutes.”

Then he kisses her again.

Tav smiles against his lips. This is a lot more than she was going for.

Raphael parts from her just long enough to check if the privacy screen that separates the car from the driver’s seat is closed. It is.

As with most things where he was concerned, she struggled to wrap her head around his bed habits. He had all the pomp of a man who wanted to be in control, while sparing none of the effort.

But there is an appeal in the challenge, in the idea of bending him to her wishes. Just as she knows he would be doing the same to her.

With practiced ease, she pulls out his cock from his trousers and kneels in front of him. The car is big enough for her to do so without issue.

Tav knows by now just how much he enjoys a show. Almost as much as he enjoys the feeling itself. So she gives him what he wants.

She starts by teasing the sensitive skin at the base of his cock, her hand fondling his balls. He sucks in a breath. He doesn’t want to let her know how eager he is already. As if she couldn’t tell.

He's not idle, in the sense that he talks her through it. Praises her at every move, telling her how good her tongue feels on him, how pretty she looks with his cock down her throat, what a naughty little whore she is who couldn’t wait until they’re out of the public eye.

Tav wasn't completely honest with Astarion. Raphael is good at this. At telling her what to do. On most days, his voice alone is enough to get her off.

He commands her to pull up her shirt, move faster, put her little fingers between her legs. Where are the manners he showed her just now?

She kisses him and takes him whole and makes that little wet noise halfway between a kiss and a suck that he likes so much. She even gives her tongue a few taps with his cock. In a matter of minutes, he’s close to the edge.

“Get up.” Sweat runs down his temples as he struggles to keep hold of himself. “I’m finishing inside you.”

“I…it’s that time of the month.” She swears she told him.

For a frightening moment, he seems to be weighing his options, before deciding on sinking his fingers into her hair, pulling her to him. “Finish what you started.”

Gladly.

The hand at the back of her neck gives her little choice. She swallows everything he has to give, little tears pricking her eyes and, when it’s done, she sticks out her tongue for his perusal. Not a drop to be seen.

His smile is wide as he gives her cheek a playful slap. She is being dismissed.

She watches him as he fixes his clothes. His hair is disheveled in all the places her fingers touched. There’s a hint of pride in knowing she was the cause, in knowing she was the one to make a dent in his perfectly manicured facade.

It is only for the sake of her rebellious womb that she doesn’t guide his fingers to her wet cunt so he can finish what he started. Disgust be damned.

“Later then.”

She gives him one last look before the door closes. His voice is husky when he finally answers, evoking a pet name coined long ago.

“Until later, little mouse.”

#my writing #raphtav #raphael fanfiction #bg3 fanfiction #made slight tweaks to the first part #and renamed it #raphael x tav

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xspeter · 1 year

Text

𝟎𝟎𝟏: 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄

𝐩𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐞 𝐣𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐛𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 (𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐬𝐭) 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐯𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞.

trying to adjust to life after jumping five years into the future was hard for you, well, really it was hard for everyone, but it felt especially hard for you.

you didn’t know why, but you felt like you had lost a big chunk of your life, even though technically you hadn’t. you were still exactly where you had been before the blip.

it’s weird being in the same grade with kids who the last time you talked to them, had barely started middle school. now, they sat next to you in chemistry.

you tried not to think about it to much. tried not to think about the fact that five years of your life had been stolen- that realistically, you should’ve been in college right now.

you sniffed, realizing that while you had been staring at the wall mr. harrington had already moved onto the next slide. peter knocks his knee against yours, a silent, you okay?

you glance at him and smile, nodding your head, a silent yes. you turn your attention back to the notes, trying to ignore the way peters eyes practically burn holes into your skull.

you know he doesn’t believe you, but you can’t find it in yourself to care.

not only has the world changed, peter seems to have as well.

he’s more closed off, a bit quieter, he seems sadder. you wish you could force him to talk to you, to tell you what was going on- but that would be a bit hypocritical wouldn’t it?

you let out a sigh of relief as the bell rings, signaling the end of fifth period and the beginning of lunch. you collect your things quickly and silently wait as peter does the same.

as you both make your trek to the cafeteria, you pass by a laughing mj. peter stops and stares for a moment, his eyes widening as he swallows and quickly begins to walk again. you roll your eyes and huff out a laugh, “go talk to her.” you suggest.

peter shakes his head quickly, “talk to who?” he asks, clearing his throat and practically speeding down the hallway.

you match his pace, “oh, come on peter. we both know that you’re like- totally in love with mj! like wes bennet and liz buxbaum type of in love.”

peter scrunches his nose, “who?”

you roll your eyes and grab his bicep, forcing him to a stop. “it doesn’t matter, what does matter is that mj 110% likes you back, and if you don’t do something about it now brad is going to beat you to it.” you say, nodding over peters shoulders to a staring brad.

when he notices you looking at him he quickly looks away, going back to talking with his friends.

peter bites the inside of his cheek, his grip on his books tightening.

“i’ll think about it.” he finally says, and you smile.

“atta boy!”

lunch has always been your favorite part of the day, even if the food is practically inedible. peter and ned argue about which star wars character is the best and why, personally you’d always had a space saved in your heart for anakin, but the only person who knew that was peter.

you do your best to drown out their arguing and instead focus on the contents of the book in front of you. if he had been with me definitely wasn’t the best book you had ever read, but you were enjoying it so far.

you almost don’t notice that ned and peter have gone completely silent until the clang of a lunch tray is sounding next to you. when you look up, you see that mj has decided that she would sit with the three of you today.

you all stare at her in silence for a moment before she scrunches her nose and laughs awkwardly. “what?” she questions.

you shrug, glancing at a blushing peter and a smirking ned.

“you’re sitting with us?” you question and she nods, pulling out her notebook and beginning to sketch. “is that a problem?” she questions.

peter shakes his head so fast you’re sure he’ll get whiplash. “no, nope! no problem!” he stumbles and mj glances at him with a raised eyebrow.

“okay…” she mumbles and you resist the urge to snort at the giddy look on peters face, instead turning your focus back to autumn and finney.

before you can even pick up where you left off though, mj pokes your shoulder.

“i’ve read that.” she says.

you hum in acknowledgment, “did you like it?” you question.

she shrugs, “it wasn’t my favorite book ever, but the ending is pretty sad.”

you nod, “yeah, i’m like 95% sure finney’s gonna die and i’m trying to mentally prepare myself.”

mj snorts and bites her lip, “i’m not gonna spoil anything, but prepare yourself.”

you laugh at that, and you ask her about any other books she’s read. your conversation continues until the end of lunch, and by that point you both have exchanged numbers and you promise to update her once you finish the book.

peter and ned are both staring at you with their jaws hanging open as you walk down the hallway to your english class, which you luckily all share.

“what?” you question and ned runs a hand through his hair.

“you just got mj’s number.” he says.

you quirk a brow, “okay?”

ned rolls his eyes at your obliviousness, “okay? y/n, you’re peters in! this is how he gets mj to date him!”

you scoff, “first off, i’m not going to bargain off my new friend so peter can live out his teenage boy fantasy and swap spit with her on his bed-”

“what!?” peter interjects, his cheeks blistering.

you ignore him and continue, “and secondly, if peter really likes her than he’ll ask her out himself. plus, i’m pretty sure she likes him back, so you don’t even need my help.” you finish.

peter stutters out a rebuttal but you shove a hand in his face, “the answer is no, peter.” you say and he sighs, his head hanging low as you enter class.

you wipe the tears that begin to brim in your eyes as you put if he had been with me back on your bookshelf. you make a mental note to text mj once you finish bawling your eyes out.

before you can curl up on your bed though, there’s a tap on your window.

you jump, startled, until you realize it’s just peter.

peter has been climbing onto your fire escape since you were both fourteen years old. no body else knew about your secret meetings except the two of you, and for some reason that made it feel sacred.

you push the window open with a grunt, helping peter stumble into the your small room.

peters eyebrows furrow when he gets a good look at you, and his hand comes up to cup your cheek. “are you crying?” he questions.

you sniff, “the ending of that book was really, really, sad.”

peter rolls his eyes with a smile and removes his hand, you find that you miss the warmth it brought.

he plops onto your bed with an exaggerated sigh and you furrow your eyebrows and sit next to him.

“what’s wrong?” you question.

he huffs and turns his head away from you.

“peter, stop it.” you groan, playfully shoving him.

he sighs again, “you love me, right?” he asks.

you swallow, “well, yeah, you’re my best friend.”

he nods, “so, if you love me, you want me to be happy, right?” he asks.

you blink, “peter where is this going?”

peters expression suddenly turns very serious, and then he’s on his knees in front of you, his hands clasped together as if he were praying.

“please date me.”

can you tell that i just finished if he had been with me.

𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ❤︎︎ 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐰𝐢𝐟𝐭 ఌ

#peter parker x reader #peter parker #marvel #tom holland #angst #far from home #fake dating #fluff #they’re in love #bestfriends to lovers

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grapecaseschoices · 5 months

Text

OC in 15: Kendis Crawford-Louel

rules: share 15 or fewer lines of dialogue from an OC, ideally lines that capture the character/personality/vibe of the OC. Bonus points for just using dialogue without other details about the scene, but you're free to include those as well!

I was tagged by @deepinifhell and am woefully delayed in getting on this.

Tagging: @thedeadthree @thee-morrigan @nat-seal-well @nightingalesighs @laufire @lusavors @cypresswrites @thelittlestspider @mt07131 @roxaro @quaxorascal @tuomniia @andthatisnotfake @sunshineandviolets @sapphic-story [tagged fifteen peeps! i think! and as always no pressure!]

Most of the dialogue from old rp stuff repurposed for this meme, some from unposted stuff, and a few I made up for this. (As warning: some cussing)

-----

1] However, strangeness of the situation proves that the metal gates aren’t fully down around the castle, because she bites out, bluntly, “No! No. I’m not okay.” Her breath hitches. “Don’t. D-don’t follow that up with another question. I thought we talked about this.”

By ‘we’ and ‘talked’, she meant the time she summarily shut down his last attempt to dig deeper. It should’ve been obvious by now that Kendis didn’t like accepting what they insisted on dishing out.

2] "Yook, Kenny, yook!"

"What'm I lookin' at, teeny tyke? --- Well, now. Look at that! Is that me? In fact, I know that's me. That's the second prettiest person in this entire art of prettiness. And is the one right next to me you? It's got to be 'cause that's definitely the prettiest person in this."

"You siwwy, Kenny. Boys not be pretty!"

"Am I? Well, if you're sayin' that's right then I'll consider it. But being silly doesn't mean I'm wrooooong~. Boys can be very pretty, kiddo. People can be whatever they wanna be so long as they're --- kind, yeah? And you're the kindest, prettiest, most talented teeny tyke, I've ever known. Oh, now you're laughin' at me, huh? Well, Ima show you 'bout that teeny brat."

3] "Who invented white allosexuals, like for real? Someone return this woman to sender."

4] "We're not even four days into a fucking New Year and this shit stain is stinkin' up the place."

5] "And I get that it's different things for different people. But I rather lose a place, than lose the people that matter with it."

6] "I know you've probs been lied to lately. But you're really not cute."

7] "He obvi picked bad pics on purpose, you Italian booger."

8] "I'm like Siri. Except better looking, smarter, much louder, and not an AI slave to a hegemonic hell-hole that stole the name of one of the best fruits. Like ever."

9] "Um, excuse you. I'm not reckless. What 'bout me screams the self sacrifice type?"

10] "Hey. Hey! Look at me! That's it ... slow breaths. I've got you. Do you -- you're okay, slowly ... Do you remember what I told you last week? Just nod. I've got you. I've got ya. You remember this? That's my pinky. We pinky promised -- the biggest and most bindable way to lock in a promise, yeah? And you may not know this about me, but I don't make promises that I can't see through. I said you're gonna be okay. And I mean that. I'm gonna make it happen, okay? I'll -- I'm here now and I'll be there at the end. Prommy, prommy, prommy, prommy, pro -- oh, a laugh, huh? Ha. That's what I like hearing. Leave the worryin' to me, dude."

11] "If this human version of a mutated ingrown armpit hair follicle don't get up off my face in the next 10, 9, 8, 7, …."

12] “Ow! Fudging snowcaps! That bitch hur –” They stopped mid-yelling but simply began complaining underneath their breath.

13] "I'm --," Kendis gestured sharply with their right hand as if orchestrating their feelings or encouraging Morgan to jump in. Not that they gave her much of a chance when they quickly added, "You know."

"You're?" Morgan smirked, "You know? I don't think I do."

"Yes. You do."

"Nah, nothing's ringing a bell."

"Well, that's probably all the brain damage you got from the last fight."

"Right. I remember that. The fight where I got stabbed instead of you."

Kendis' nostrils flare and their jaw clenches so tightly Morgan almost feels a sympathy twinge in her own teeth.

14]

“Then why won’t you tell me you love me? Maybe a little reward so I can be brave?”

“‘Cause a face full of kisses wasn’t enough? Wow.”

“Sure, it was nice but this is a big deal. I think I deserve a bigger reward.”

“Aren’t rewards for after you actually do the stuff?”

“You’re right. How about you say ‘I love you’ just because you do!”

“You look cute when you pout an’ you’re gonna be late.”

“Please, Kendis? We’ve been dating for a while now and … That is – Unless – You don’t.”

“I don’t what?”

“You know you are always avoiding it, saying how you feel about me, and you’ve never come close to saying the words .. and sometimes I’ve wondered … I’ve been very patient the last several months –”

“Then keep on with that.”

“Okay. Okay. Kendis. Do you love me?”

“Can we talk about this later? This ain’t as black an’ white as you’re making it look like.”

“But it is. It is a very black and white question with a very black and white answer. Do you love me?”

“Austyn. Austyn? Stop that! What’re you doin’? Don’t. You’re – fuckin’ –”

“These are the notes I wrote you. Look at them. Look how far they reach on your floor. Look!”

“No”

“You never even wrote it back. I kept saying it and writing it and you never gave anything back … B-because … because you don’t.”

“I never gave – We’re not doin’ this right now. Again. Why’re you doin’ this right now? We don’t even have the time to really get into -”

“What is there to get into? It’s yes or no, Kendis! If you say that, then it will be all settled.”

“Maybe stop cuttin’ me off an’ let me speak.”

“You cut me off first! And don’t you start raising your voice at me!”

“You started that shit first, yourself! What is with you?”

“Why are you acting like I am overreacting? I’m not! It isn’t wrong to want to know whether or not my best friend is in love with me. It isn’t wrong to know if you really see a future with us together or if you’ve been just tagging along because I’m one of the very few other out girls in school.”

“You called me your best friend.”

“What?”

“You should know how I feel. You say I don’t give you nothin’ back but that’s a damn lie an’ you know it.”

“Then why don’t you say it? I say it all the time!”

“But are you really meanin’ it?”

“Uh - Wha – EXCUSE ME!?!!”

“Are you? How can I say those words to someone that's not a sure thing? You talk a lot about a future that ain’t here but what you really got to say for the now.”

“Wow. Asshole.”

“Takes one.”

“Fine. Don’t love me. I think it’s best if we take some space right now and reconsider our priorities.”

“Austyn. I didn’t mean – Austyn this is silly.”’

“Is it?”

“Why're we even doin’ this right now? What about the formal?”

“Don’t call me unless I call you.”

“Austyn!”

“Don’t.”

“You know what? Fuck you.”

“Apparently not even in the next few months, asshole.”

15]

Kendis narrowed her eyes but forced herself to take a deep breath, “You. Bumped into. Me!” Honestly, that was a generous and kind assessment. If Kendis had been human, she doubted she would’ve been able to stand with only a headache and a bad mood to show for it.

“Yeah, because you slowed down when you weren’t supposed to! I was keeping pace with you, speeding by the way, and then allva sudden –”

“I know you’re not blaming me for any of this, let alone your speeding, you Stranger Things reject.”

“Excuse me?”

Kendis felt that anger again – no, they could almost taste it. It was just wafting off the air from the shifter in front of them. It was churning up their stomach like sick, this anger that wasn’t their rage.

It was restless, like her’s was, but was also too hard, too cold.

Not right, not right. The warning blared in Kendis’ gut. Something was off and they needed to leave.

“Don’t!” They warned when the person reached out to grab at them, clearly making Kendis ready to skedaddle. The sharp yell struck out like a roll of thunder, loud and final enough to make this person hesitate, before Kendis’ voice dropped into a growl, “Don’t. Touch. Me.” [x]

#insight: kendis crawford louel #oc: kendis crawford louel #kendis x austyn #i wrote this great exchange for morgan and kendis but it deleted so fuck that #effing tumblr #grapecase writes #also i had a bunch of people tagged but it didnt save and idr who i tagged and i dont remember who has been tagged before so #im winging it and if i missed you im sorry. just do it and tag me. and i double tag you im sorry #as always no pressure #the longer stuff is toward the end #so long post #i'm not satisfied with number two but i've decided to stop fussing

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c-t-r-l14 · 9 months

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A RETROSPECTIVE, A REFLECTION, AND YES, ANOTHER DAMN ALEX RANT.

What I find the most amusing is the fact that Saku likes my rants about Alex.

At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if ya’ll know me as, “That One Girl Who Despises Alex”, because I write about how mad he makes me, and have MULTIPLE RANTS about how much I dislike him and his gaslighting, excuse-making, manipulative, no-backbone having, crybaby bitch ass.

Like—I be jumping Alex, reading his ass for filth, and be downright destroying him and Saku reads it and is like “Lmao, good stuff”, and LIKES THE DAMN RANTS.

It’s really crazy because at first, I was really scared about posting my first ever rant about him, because before people saw just how immature Alex was being in the breakup audio, a lot of people were jumping listener in the comments and talking about how it was their fault that this happened in the first place. Now, listener is definitely NOT a saint, at all. Even though I sympathize with them, what they did was wrong—point BLANK. But the way their relationship ended wasn’t entirely their fault.

I remember reading the comments and there were some people who said, “Ugh, if listener just didn’t say anything at all, this would’ve never happened”, but that shit confuses me so much?? I do agree that they should’ve been more careful about their approach when it comes to confrontation, but if THIS is the way Alex reacts when Listener looses their cool and does something in the heat of the moment, who is to say that it wouldn’t happen at all? He was so damn quick to end a four year relationship over a mistake. He never put in any work to see why listener acted out that day. He never once tried to talk to them, he acknowledged the fact that they don’t usually act like this, made up stupidly flimsy excuses on why the relationship would supposedly would not work, said some out of pocket shit about them not being the right partner for a long distance relationship, AND THEN PROCEEDED TO GASLIGHT THEM into thinking that THEY were the crazy one for reacting to what he just said, tried to manipulate them into thinking that the reason why their relationship ended was all their fault, and tried to act like HE was the mature one by making the decision to end it in the first place—-

And you’re telling me you saw ALL OF THIS UNFOLD, and your first thought was, “Oh yeah, all of this is definitely listener’s fault. They had it coming, lmao. Good luck to Alex in the States.”

OH H E L L NO.

If he had been so quick to end his relationship of F O U R Y E A R S in a heartbeat over something he K N E W to be an out of character mistake, then what on God’s green Earth would make ya’ll think that he’d stick around had listener stayed silent???? Listener will make mistakes, and there will come a time when their emotions will get the best of them (as it does with all of us), and you guys really believe that Alex’s fickle, emotional whiplash having, “this would be good for us, we both wouldn’t be tied down anymore 🥺” headass would still stay then???

Because, HE W O U L D N ‘ T.

He saw the opportunity to leave, and he took it. He already had his mind made from the jump when he told his mother and father, his friends, his acquaintances, his ancestors—and the ENTIRE W O R L D that he was taking that NYC job and his partner was last to know. Listener—-his own goddamn partner—-was the only person he needed to get rid of. They were his “burden” to bear, and he wanted to rid himself of it. And he didn’t want to seem like the bad guy, so he made excuses to make the break up easier on himself, pushed the blame away from him, and cried like the little baby back bitch he is in order to make it seem like this was such a hard decision to come to. He disregarded listener’s feelings, disregarded them as a whole, disrespected them, and left them with (probably) more trauma then what they started with.

I am sick and tired of seeing people blame the listener for everything that happened. They did not deserve the way they were broken up with at all. Alex isn’t a victim. He never was—and he stopped being the “mature one” (if you can even call it that) the moment those dumbass excuses came out of his slimy mouth.

For the people who were saying, “Alex deserves better than listener! I hope he finds a new partner.” Ya’ll need to realize that if this is how he acts when listener makes a mistake, he will do the absolute same thing with his future partners. He will give up the entire relationship and make an exit plan as soon as they do something even a little bit out of character. People who fold that easily and refuse to put effort in their relationship will NEVER KEEP IT. He will end up being single, and I know he’s the type of person who will never consider himself as a factor as to why his relationships all end in faliure because he has such a victim complex.

This man deserves absolutley nothing, ya’ll! NOTHING!

And I hope that one day, he realizes what he did was wrong, and apologizes to them. I will literally not be able to die peacefully if this doesn’t happen.

The craziest thing is that back in the olden days (four months ago), I would’ve been so scared to publish this whole rant, ya’ll. 😭 My dislike for Alex has been a hyper-fixation that held me in a massive chokehold—and I was honestly scared I was going to get hated on for not liking him (as well as my reasons for disliking him in the first place). But in the most strange turn of events, a lot of people share the same disdain I have for him too, and the comments on that break-up audio is now more critical toward Alex than it is toward listener, and these were both really big shocks to me. I’m really happy that a lot of people enjoy my rants, and even more happier (and surprised) to see Saku HIMSELF like my rant posts too.

Like literally ya’ll, I couldn’t believe my eyes. The love ya’ll leave for these rants are the reasons why I feel more and more confident to make them in the first place, and I appreciate it all very much.

So, here’s to next year, and to all the rants I’ll make in the future! And I hope we’ll all have a great year!

(Except for you, Alex. I hope your credit card declines when you try to pay for that $2.90 train fare and nobody opens the emergency door for you).

#sakuverse #zsakuva #alex zsakuva #I love ya’ll fr #i’m so pissed off ya’ll don’t even know the half of it #he better apologize #he makes me so pissed off #i really do hope his credit card declines and he has massive train delays #Ya’ll should really know the drill by now #If you follow me you should know what you’ve signed up for c’mon now #anyway #hope ya’ll have a good year #except for Alex I hope when there’s cops there when he tries to jump the turnstyle in the train station

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sweetestpopcorn · 9 months

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How would you rank Jaehaerys and Alysanne’s children in terms of greatness/potential? For me, Baelon was best out their children with Saera being second. I also think Viserra was a waisted potential. I think she could have done interesting stuff had she lived. Do you think perhaps maybe Baelon should’ve married her after Alyssa’s death? Obviously, no one could replace Alyssa in his heart.

Hi there :)

I have already kind of answered this regarding my thoughts about Saera and Viserra and none of it is good. I will just link them here and here . Legit they are just portrayed as mean girls with no real depth to them, though of the two, Saera is much, much worse. Viserra I can at least sympathise with since her parents seem to not give half a f_ck about her and did not even extend to her the same courtesy they did her siblings of having a say about her marriage (more here), but that's about it. I don't find anything else likeable about her she's just... empty.

I will go from least favourite to favourite.

Saera and Viserra go right to the bottom of my list. Followed very closely by Vaegon by obvious reasons. Like Vaegon, it literally costs you 0 golden dragons to not be so unlikable.

Then I would say Daenerys, she has a lot of sweet moments but dies young so I don't really know how she would have turned out. Besides, I know it's petty of me, but I don't like other characters having Dany's name. I do like Daenerys, Naerys's daughter but... yeah no more. You don't need more Daenerys, we have our Mother of Dragons. Yes, I know I am petty.

Then Gael because... poor baby 🥺 seriously what was George thinking writing a character who is Alysanne's comfort, with some degree of cognitive disability be r...... by some random singer, give birth, lose her baby, and kill herself?! Like enough's enough. It's literally just to add tragedy to her story and honestly Turtle man it's getting f:cking OLD. I swear this man gets his rocks off by adding tragedy and terrible abuse to female characters. This when he can bother to make them more than a walking womb.

Then I would say Aemon. Maybe he would be higher but at times I just feel he's too perfect if that's a thing. There’s just nothing wrong with him like 😂 he literally does nothing wrong.

Daella comes next because I find her funny. She's such a drama queen 24/7 making everyone around her want to protect her XD even Alyssa. I kind of got the vibes at times from her that she kind of knew what she was doing to get attention. Like the fact that she and Alyssa are Rhaenyra's grandmothers just makes so much sense no matter how you look at it. In a way Rhaenyra seems kind of a mixture of both? With tons of stubborn and style added. Another moment that really endeared me to Daella was her very tragic death, and how despite all her suffering she still wanted to be given Aemma and to feed her. Prime mom material right there -> like you can tell both from her and Alyssa that Rhaenyra got some top notch mom genes.

Then Alyssa of course, because she was THE queen. Literally she was just a better behaved version of her son and I'm here for it! I love how despite the fact that she was clearly a tomboy she still wanted to marry Baelon and give him an army of kids X'D because these two things are not mutually exclusive and liking or enjoying traditional boy things does not have to say anything about your sexuality or your desire to be a mother - just like being very feminine and liking traditionally feminine activities does not have to say anything about your sexuality or desire to parent. These are rules a society that does not understand nuance and in a sense is deeply sexist and stereotypical likes to put in place and that I find deeply harmful to people. But Alyssa is the BOMB, so funny, so bold, the way she embarrassed Vaegon who was a little sh:t *chef's kiss*

Then there's the best man ever -> Baelon Targaryen

Had his own cool nickname, The Spring Prince, funny, charming, sexy, single dad who never once forgot about his lady with the mismatched eyes, entered a tourney under the name of the Silver Fool... I don't feel like a need to say more, and in an era where all men were literally so problematic, Baelon was IT.

Baelon is what this fandom thinks Corlys is. Sorry not sorry.

And that's it :D

Also no, and more important that should Baelon remarry, the question is did he want to remarry? And the answer is no, and any Baelon fan would respect the Spring Prince and his undying love for his lady with the mismatched eyes <3

#saera targaryen #viserra targaryen #vaegon targaryen #daenerys targaryen #gael targaryen #aemon targaryen #daella targaryen #alyssa targaryen #baelon targaryen #fire and blood #valyrianscrolls #popcorn answers

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blues-valentine · 2 years

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S&B SEASON 2: THOUGHTS *a long ride*

I have conflicting emotions about that ending and overall how the whole season was handled for both SOC/S&B respectivelly.

First, I knew that I was going to be disappointed because they would mix S&S and R&R but this was a lot messier than I gave them the credit for. It left little room to develop Alina’s story line beyond the superficial. It felt to me like they were just trying to develop Nikolai for the KOS spin off and this seems unfair for Alina. She deserved her own time and it felt like they were just rushing to get her plot done.

I get TGT is not the most interesting and that the other books have been superior but it’s the start of the grishaverse and it sustains a lot of important things they just skipped over. Alina and her crew (Mal, Genya, Zoya, David, etc) deserved the time to breathe and their own exploration. Alina’s need/greed for power, the political aspect and her religious influence was glossed over and not developed further. Season 2 should’ve ended with Alina’s failed attempt to fully take down Darkling and being taken by the Apparat and therefore forced to become a religious pawn because this was an interesting aspect to Alina but also Tolya and Tamar, who ultimately were just there to fill the space in Nikolai’s story line and didn't get to explore that side.

Another thing about this season is that everything happened in such an anticlimatic way. Mal's amplifier reveal, Genya's backstory about the royal family and just so much that was more impactful in the books. David was killed off too soon. He didn't even get to marry Genya. Zoya deserved so much more and i'll hate it if I don't ever see her get to rule Ravka. Tolya and Tamar weren't given the level of depth I was expecting with their devotion to Alina. It was just too messy for me. I do think the season managed to improve some stuff. I think she Shu Han aspect was an interesting thing to add.

Don't even get me started with SOC because I feel like they have included basically everything so when the spin off does end up happening (we need good numbers for season 2 first) so many plots are not even going to happen. They took so many CK moments but without the right context so that didn't make it feel as impactful as it should've been. The actors truly did everything with those scenes especially with the Kanej scenes but it would've been so much better to have the full implications of what it means for their development. I wasn't too happy with how Inej's plot was handled. Literally we had CK before we even got SOC. And can we speak about the ableism with Kaz and his cane? Please.

Now, with that ending. I get what they had to change it. If they were to go with the R&R ending then there won't be actual story line for Alina and Mal. I’m still trying to understand why they couldn’t just use 3 seasons for the 3 books and wait to do the spins off, but I get that business is a whole different thing. So, that ending, like the whole season, it was rushed. You couldn't even feel sad because everything was happening so fast. The fact that Tolya and Tamar weren't the ones trying to bring Mal back to life was a shame because the friendship between Mal and Tolya was everything in the books. Alina clearly took part of Darkling's merzost powers to bring Mal back to life and this will cause her power corruption. But, the whole poison thing was so weird? This is a way to link the SOC characters and the KOS plot together but it's just so weird. About Malina’s ending, they did this to extend their arc in the show (x). I don't dislike the idea of them parting for a while until they get back to each other I just hated the way it felt too strange for both of them. I would have taken Mal asking Alina for time to be on it's own but not that weird excuse about his powers. And then, Alina had a whole struggle on R&R because she did not want to be a queen, because she wanted to be married for love and not for alliance. That Alina felt like a fanfic, not the real one. I have my own thoughts on where her story line will go for Season 3 (if there's one) and it could be interesting if executed right but I'm not too sure about that.

The season was far from perfect. It was messy and rushed. From both sides they skipped vital moments and interactions that could've made so many of the scenes have more sense and feel impactful. But I still would want a Season 3 and for those spin offs to be green lighted because those actors are too talented to lose for this.

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deviiancetv · 5 months

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The Misconception of Doja Cat (Controversy & Era Analysis)

Heyyoo, so this post is going to be a smaller version of a bigger analysis video I plan to make in the near future about Doja Cat’s Scarlet album. I’ll be sharing my thoughts when it comes to Doja Cat, her recent Scarlet era, the controversies that have followed, as well as how I think she could’ve been conceptualized this era.

There will be a video that comes along with this post some time in the future on my channel, so follow me on YouTube ≫ deViianceTV

In the meantime, let’s talk briefly about this Scarlet era. The themes, concept, and messaging + what I would’ve fixed if I was in the room with her

Scarlet is an album that thematically is about Doja creating this alter ego to be used as a way to lash out at her haters and people who wanted her to fit in a box that critics placed her in. A scarred starlet rebelling against the public eye and people’s perceptions of her.

The concept is a bloodied version of Doja’s alter ego, Scarlet, who symbolizes the bruised and broken version of her that is being reborn into someone confident, tapping into her inner creativity, esoteric intrigue, and embracing her natural beauty.

There are MANY things from this era that I would fix such as making this era a dynamic story of self-discovery through visual and sonic versatility. One example I would’ve loved is, if she had split this album into two separate pieces of art that bounce off one another in themes and symbolic representation. The first side of the album having dark horror Punk/Rave Rap elements, odes to video games and horror movies she likes. The other side having sultry R&B elements with a lighter tone of inner peace as she accepts her more melodic and jazz roots.

I don’t take Doja as much of a lyricist all the time. She has instances when she can be very witty with fun bars that have pop culture references, and double entendres, but she’s not overly lyrical in her songs. She should’ve taken more time on this project to better compile and write her songs with formatting structures and great analogies that have you think… instead, we essentially got her venting about how rich she is and how she was being attacked online. And then there’s the butter toast line which was just not good lol.

Honestly, another thing that ruined this era is the fact that there were too many controversies involving the time she dissed her fans, her romantic relationship with J Cyrus, and her self-identity issues that have plagued her career since she became mainstream. A lot of these things could’ve been handled better, had she not lashed out on social media, and showcased the cracks within her character. She is to blame for the many times she’s been canceled, by not growing and evolving or even holding herself accountable for her transgressions.

I may be overly critical of her, but that’s because I KNOW she can do so much better, than what she’s given us. I’m hopeful that the next era will be more developed, thought-out, and less drama-filled, focusing on just the music, with standalone videos. Doja IS meant a bonafide star, but Scarlet is a bloodstain on her discographic career… an aesthetically pleasing bloodstain, but still a bloodstain nonetheless.

#poptopics #doja cat #scarlet doja cat #scarlet album #female rappers #hip hop #pop rap #pop music #pop culture #coachella #celebrity gossip

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solar--system · 5 months

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Holy shit I got posted! It only took me three years of being a system online.

Let’s go through some things because as I mentioned in an earlier post these subreddits spread misinformation!

1. All these alters from their favorite shows games, and general YouTubers.

We have 1-3 fictives in our system. 1-3 because I’m thinking two of the fictives that “formed” recently weren’t real. I think someone in the system took on the personalities of characters from our hyperfixation show and we mistook it as a fictive. I’m not certain on this yet though.

2. Makes memes almost weekly about how silly their altars are being in headspace.

Funny cause we dont post about other alters in our system much. And we don’t really have access to headspace so… how am I making weekly memes about these things?

3. And makes new alters every week.

Depending on if those fictives are real or not, we havent formed a new alter in 3-4 months. And the last split before that was 7 months away. So we don’t split often and we’re a system of about 15ish. Huge numbers I know /s

4. They shared a post about Inside out and Riley having alters. I’ve linked the post because it was a silly post I reblogged saying that you should’ve realized you were a system sooner based on how much you rated to the emotion characters in inside out.

But I’ve finally done it. 3 years of being open as a system online and I finally got fakeclaimed. I just wish they had better reasoning. Honestly the post probably happened cause I said r/FDC and r/SC spread misinformation. Here’s a fun fact for everyone. Endos spread misinformation, these subreddits spread misinformation, and yes even CDD systems spread misinformation. Anyways thank you for this new honor. Try harder next time though, kay?

Here’s the link to my post in case anyone wants to check it out. I find it funny so no harassment or hate towards the poster or any commenters. I wanna see what they have to say.

#dissociative alters #actually did #actually dissociative #did community #dissociative identities #endo dni #traumagenic system #osddid #traumagenic did #dissociative system #tw fakeclaiming #fakeclaiming mention #system cringe #fake disorder cringe

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paleparearchive · 9 days

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The Secret to Beautiful, Soft Skin

Van Dyck's initial 1★ story (1/1)

Location: dormitory hallway (night) | Characters: Van Dyck, Aoi/MC

Van Dyck: What, something smells sooo sweet… Who is making sweets at this hour!? Well, I can almost guess it.

Aoi: Ah, Van Dyck-kun! Just in time. I was just about to call you to where we were.

Van Dyck: Me? What is it for?

Aoi: Hubert-kun and Millet-kun baked pies with vegetables and fruits from their garden.

Van Dyck: Sigh… I knew it…

Aoi: Huh? What did you say?

Van Dyck: It's nothing. So?

Aoi: Ah, right. So, you know, there's a lot of them, and I was going around asking people about them.

Van Dyck: Even if you came all this way, sorry, I’ll pass.

Aoi: Uh… Is that so? They’re very delicious, you know?

Van Dyck: Delicious, you say… You didn't eat them, did you?

Aoi: I-I did eat them… is that not good?

Van Dyck: Of course it's not good. I can’t believe it! What are you thinking? Binge eating at night is the worst enemy of beauty.

Aoi: B-But they said they tried to bring out the flavor of the ingredients, so they kept the amount of sugar low…?

Van Dyck: That's not the issue! It's about your lack of sense of beauty!

Aoi: Uuuuuh…

Van Dyck: Ah. Besides, your skin has gotten a little dry these days, right? I don’t think so, but you don't skip skincare, do you!?

Aoi: Uuuuhm, I do apply cream after washing my face or taking a bath…

Van Dyck: Only that!? I can’t believe it!! Aaaah, just look at your face and hands, your skin is so dry.

Aoi: Uhm. S-Sorry?

Van Dyck: No matter how beautiful it normally is, if you don't take care of it, it will deteriorate in no time.

Aoi: R-Right…

Van Dyck: I don't think so, but you're not using the same cream all the time, are you?

Aoi: Huh? I always just pick an appropriate one based on the scent and use the same one every day until it runs out…

Van Dyck: Siiiiigh… Seriously, you.

The condition of your skin is different every day! How can your skin be satisfied with just one! You really don't know the basics of beauty!!

Aoi: B-But I don’t have a sensitive skin, at least I think.

Van Dyck: You… It’s quite beautiful to begin with, so don't ruin it yourself.

Aoi: I don’t mean to ruin it, though…

Van Dyck: Just the fact that you're not taking care of it is enough, it's an affront to beauty.

Aoi: Uh, I’m sorry. I’m busy, so…

Van Dyck: Well, I know it's a lot of work for you. But you’re the face of this museum now, aren't you? If the signboard wasn't beautiful, no one would come to see it. In other words, it’s your duty to be beautiful at all times!

Aoi: M-My duty…

Van Dyck: Do you get it? Proper daily care is the fastest way to beautiful skin! First, thoroughly cleanse the dirt from your skin, then tidy it up by applying face lotion and milky lotion. Take care of it without fail during the day. At night, moisturize thoroughly with cream. Choose serums, masks and packs depending on the condition of your skin and the climate of the day. Give the skin what it wants, as much as it wants, and not too much or too little.

Aoi: … Amazing. So that's why your skin is always so soft!

Van Dyck: It’s obvious, isn’t it? Don't be impressed, you’ll be doing it every day from now on.

Aoi: Uh… I’ll do my best. B-But since we're here, why don't we go to where the others are? The pie, the delicious one, you know.

Binge eating at night might not be a good idea, but maybe just a bite or something like that would be okay? And Rubens-san came too, so…

Van Dyck: Teacher is there!? You should’ve told me that first!! C’mon, what are we doing!? Let's go to the kitchen quickly!

#palette parade #palette parade tl #palepare #palepare tl #translation #card tl #card translation #van dyck #anthony van dyck #1★

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kaisacobra · 8 months

Note

I’ll be sending you the invoice for the therapy session I’ll be needing after reading “Second Best”, I should’ve stayed curious😔. KIDDING, I fucking loved it and can’t wait for the emotional turmoil you’ll be putting all of us through in part two!

I vote on R being alive, you said you weren’t sure if you’d kill her off for the angst but I think having to grieve somebody who’s still alive in this particular story would be very interesting. If she dies, no doubt in my mind that R would forever infest Tara’s every waking moment but I don’t want her to die sad. It’s not even that I want a happy ending for Tara, I want a happy ending for R, whether or not that’s with Tara(if it’s with Tara she has A LOT of groveling to do).

When it comes to situations like this, one of the things I think that levels the playing field is if R says something hurtful (maybe more hurtful cause what I wrote down below, R is just spitting FACTS). I already know nothing she can say would ever be as hurtful as what Tara said but something along the lines of.

Tara: Alright my bad, can we just forget it ever happened?

R: Why should we? So you can do it again next week?

Tara: Y/N please… -

R: No I’m sick of this! You know what your fucking problem is? I’m the only person who’s never left you, who’s always been there for you! But you’re the most selfish and self-serving person I know and you’re so fucking used to being abandoned that you actually think I’m obsessed! I mean you care more about your dead ex who tried to murder us- more than you care about me, and it’s made me realize that just means you don’t care about me. You never have. You’re more trouble then you’re worth Tara, I think-… I know I’d be a lot happier if I never hear from you again.

You said you weren’t sure if you’d follow the plot of the Scream movies, whether or not you do. I think Quinn getting close to R would hurt Tara. After the first chapter I do believe R wouldn’t really be around the group much, because subconsciously she’ll still value Tara’s comfort over her own and want them to be there for Tara instead of her. So that would leave R in a vulnerable position and make it incredibly easy for Quinn to befriend R, all it would take is R seeing her do things for her that Tara wouldn’t do. Since Quinn is Tara’s roommate and they hangout in the same friend group I think having to see that in person would not only make Tara jealous but really magnify her neglectful and harsh treatment of R. ESPECIALLY if Quinn is still a murderer in the next chapter because then Tara would undoubtedly blame herself for R’s death near experience, because she’d be the reason that all it took was someone doing the bare minimum (I’d want Quinn to do more than just the bare minimum for revenge jealousy but that’s just me) to get R to trust them.

Your writing is really good so at the end of the day I’ll be happy with anything! Thank you for sharing your work with us and I hope you have a wonderful day, you deserve it babe.

First of all, I really appreciate the words and i absolutely LOVE your thoughts on it. Seriously, you wrote them so well, i honestly think you could also write some great stories someday if that's something you would want to do. (If you do, please tell me because I'll be eagerly reading it🤭)

I'm trying my best to keep things mysterious so the stuff you read on part 2 can still be surprising BUT you make some great points and I wouldn't be shocked if some of those things actually end up happening, but who knows🤫

Thank U so much for sharing your thoughts and i also hope you have a wonderful day (or night, yk, timezones)

#✦: 𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑛 𝑎𝑠𝑘𝑠

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ofmonstersandpen · 11 months

Text

ik chainsaw man discourse is the last thing anyone would expect on this blog but im gonna make it and it is solely about denji because. omg listen denji was just a fucked up kid with a fucked up childhood that therefore made him into a teenager with a fucked up outlook on the world and how it was supposed to operate and treat him. and those early chapters and arcs just make me think of how many young boys are being raised by media and developing these fucked up outlooks of the world and how it does or should operate and their parents aren’t supervising because “oh it’s not doing much harm” but it is. denji didn’t know better and look what makima did.

leaving teen boys to themselves and letting them absorb too much media leaves you with vulnerable children that want to be men so badly they can’t tell they’re being victimized. they get too wrapped up in “it’s just like the movies” that they don’t grasp that they can be taken advantage of. that’s how we end up with grown men that can’t recognize they can in fact be r*ped by women. that’s how we get grown men that are afraid and hurt and covering it with false bravado because if they come forward with it they get ridiculed or told they should’ve enjoyed it. a lot of misogynistic and sexist men are just boys that weren’t taught right. a lot of their stories start, not exactly like, but similar to denji’s. chasing after what’s projected as the male fantasy in desperation to be a man. sorry, not shutting up about it

#tw: violence #tw: abuse #chainsaw man #csm denji #chainsaw man denji #chainsaw man makima #fuck makima #me and all my homies hate makima #i once again look too deeply into a character and begin to find a shitton of applications to real life #musings #rant #rant post

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inkblot-inc · 2 years

Text

What We've Lost

Summary: The prequel to To Be Back In Step; Set a bit post-Endgame. Essentially the pot before it boils over, the pot boiling over, and then having to put more water in the pot to restart making the ramen, and then watching that water come to a boil like a hawk.

Pairing: Christine Palmer x Reader, Wanda Maximoff x Reader (Platonic)

Warning(s): Dark Themes; This is an angsty boi, but hey read TBBIS and you get a happy(?)..-let’s use a neutral word- decent ending for the Reader, The buildup to dark!reader, 616- Chrissy being a bit of a dumbass, Stephen is still a self-ingratiating dick (as per usual in this universe), R and Wanda being two sad bitches with overwhelming powers and trauma and grief….so besties. Also Language (because, again, this is me we’re talking about here-)

Notes: The patience you and I needed to have to get this here- when I tell you this shit has been in the works and sitting in my doc before it was even requested, before TBBIS was even finished, I mean that shit. (Mainly because I had so much more that I wanted to write here, TBBIS just wound up done quicker. To be fair to myself, this shit is just about QUADRUPLE the length of TBBIS-) But I also mean it when I say life has been kicking my ass like this is Mario Strikers T-T. but hey hey it’s here! so I hope y’all enjoy :3

Word Count: bud, you're looking at a little more than 8.3k

*squints* I give NO ONE permission to repost or translate my work. Make your own shit

“When I went under, the world was at war. I wake up, they say we won. They didn’t say what we lost.”- Steve Rogers, Captain America

-----

You were so tired.

Too many people had to die for this “plan” to work. You watched as Tony Stark snapped his fingers to undo this entire mess while stewing on the fact that this shitshow could’ve and should’ve been avoided.

As much as you wanted to just be done with everything after the battle, you had to tend to your duties as Sorcerer Supreme.

You spent your first few weeks back making sure everything was functioning properly. It was probably the most important of the duties The Ancient One prepared you for. The people that were brought back from The Snap in less-than-ideal conditions were moved to safety, those that had loved ones were taken to them as well.

There was an incident in New Jersey that you were meant to look into and fix, but it was suddenly marked out of your jurisdiction as those below your station marked it as “Dealt With”. Trusting this, you had to use your astral form for the last bit of your maintenance. The conditions of the mystical and spiritual worlds needed to be accounted for and settled as they’d gone awry in your absence.

You’d think they have someone able to handle this while you were gone.

As soon as you were sure the time to be selfless was over, you headed out. Despite your fatigue from restoring balance and the heavy decline of adrenaline, you managed to have your sling ring finally take you to the one place you wanted to be. Looking up at your shared penthouse, your only concern was making sure Christine was okay and making sure this dusting mess didn’t take too much out of her, whether she was or wasn’t dusted herself didn’t matter to you.

The lock was stubborn as your key didn’t slide in anymore. Using some quick magic, you simply undid the lock yourself before making your way inside.

You almost thought you had the wrong house.

The walls were repainted, taking you back to the few swatches you remember Christine showing you. They complimented the ebony wood perfectly, just like she said they would.

It was everything else that made you raise an eyebrow.

The sleek metal accents clashed heavily with the questionable minimalist paintings, neither of which you remember being mentioned between the two of you, the big L-shaped couch sitting in the living room instead of the cozy pair of couches you’d gotten shortly after getting this place. These pieces were gaudier than you’d like, and they weren’t really Christine’s style either. One look at the pictures over the mantle of the newly finished fireplace told you why:

Strange.

Pictures of Christine and Stephen together, new pictures you’d never seen, sat in frames. Your eyes rested on the “centerpiece”.

Their wedding photo.

You immediately felt your heart drop, seemingly drilling a hole for the rapidly growing pit in your stomach. You sunk to your knees, eyes fixed on the five by seven.

An icy numb feeling took hold of your body. Coddled by despair and reassured by slowly building anguish.

Then you heard it. The soft click of the door shutting somewhere to your left. Your eyes clenched shut at the sound of those familiar light steps. She was still in her work clothes. She changed shifts.

You didn’t even flinch as you heard what must have been groceries abruptly fall to the ground. It wasn’t until you heard her voice, brimming with a series of emotions that your shoulders jumped involuntarily.

“Y/n?”

You slowly turned your head to look over your shoulder to see her looking right at you. Christine was still in her scrubs, light auburn hair tied back in her usual fashion. As you’d guessed, she’d just gotten off of work.

Taken out of her stupor, Christine rushed forward, joining you on the floor and wrapping her arms around your shoulders. you could only manage to loosely grasp her biceps as your eyes began to water.

Nothing truly registered as Chirstine continued to check you over, proclamations of relief and confusion tumbling out of her mouth as your gaze stayed on the resident of her fourth finger.

That’s not your ring.

Christine stopped fussing over your haggard appearance when you had yet to say a word to her. Bringing her hands to cup your face, your eyes were glassy as you appeared to look through her, hyper focused on the bit of cool metal that met your skin.

“Y/n, baby, talk to me.” Her honeyed words came out thoughtlessly before Christine took a pause, unsure if it was for your benefit or her own.

For you, the phrase brought anything but comfort, because it was tainted. It was scalding ice as your head all but tore from her grip.

“Let go- Let go of me!”

You skittered backward, your palms slipping slightly on the hardwood as you try to keep balance. You go to collect your thoughts when all that keeps running through your head is that this shouldn’t have happened.

This shouldn’t have happened to you.

Whenever something seems to be going right for you it always comes back to-

You both heard a familiar hiss and crackle as orange sparks form into a portal, one Stephen Strange stepping into the room. His steps stop short at seeing your figure in his home.

But you supposed that’s expected.

There’s a lull in the tense atmosphere as Stephen levels his gaze with yours. “Y/n, your presence is presently required at Kamar-Taj. If you’d come with me, please.”

Your eyes squint on reflex at the out-of-place request, taking you out of the vacuum you felt sucked into. While you certainly could understand why they would need to see you, you’d been gone for an especially long time no doubt, you didn’t want to go anywhere with Stephen Strange right now.

One look at the expression on your face was enough to let the sorcerer know you wouldn’t exactly be compliant. “Please, Y/n. It’s urgent.”

Rising to your feet, your jaw clenched as you got ready to deny him with eyes focused back onto Christine. You wanted to talk, to figure out what had happened on her end, and if she was okay, your own pain set aside.

While you were still gathering your bearings, it seemed that Stephen’s courtesy and patience only ran so far as you were brought into another portal he’d quickly created, bringing you to Kamar Taj himself.

Regaining your balance was easy, but the disdain you felt for your situation came tenfold as you were thrust back into a situation you had not wanted to deal with at the moment, nor did it matter nearly as much to you right now.

You weren’t slow. The love of your life had apparently moved on and married Stephen. While that reality broke you, Christine was still your friend. You were both adults, and you wanted to speak to her. Initial hurt and even anger aside, if she was happy now then… That’s all there was, wasn’t it? You don’t know that you could even deny her that, you’d just wish she would have been happy with you.

Like she could have been.

As you watched Stephen walk up the steps to the temple you merely watched him before speaking up, “Take me back.”

Stopping short, Stephen turned around to address you, “Again, the matter is urgent. It has to do with your title of Sorcerer Supreme.”

At this, you merely let out a sigh before begrudgingly moving forward to follow. “Let’s get this over with then.”

making your way into the main corridor, you observed that the other masters of the Mystic Arts were in attendance, seated and waiting. They all stood up to bow as you and Stephen came into view. You bowed toward everyone out of respect before moving to make your way further into the hall, only to be stopped by Wong.

“Well, are you going to let me through?”

Wong kept his hand firm on your shoulder keeping you in place, “You must remain in the center for the proceedings to commence.”

You furrowed your brows, “Why? I’m not being tried for a crime or misconduct, it’s a matter of discussing upkeep while I was away, correct?”

Wong merely remained silent before moving past you to take a seat of his own. “Stay here.” You school your face as everyone goes past you, feeling another brush pass your shoulder.

Once you made your way to the center as requested and everyone else was situated, Stephen spoke up. “We may now begin if everyone is ready.”

You actually raised your hand, though it was unnecessary seeing as though you were at the front of everyone’s vision. “Actually, I would like to know what this gathering is about specifically, seeing as though this is the first I’m hearing of it. Great confusion, as you can imagine.” Even now you couldn’t completely get rid of your snark brought on by annoyance of being left in the dark.

It was Sara who spoke up, “You have been assumed dead, lost to us, for five years, Dr. L/n, and while you have been away many things have had to change.” Her tone was light and even sympathetic. easing into this information seemed the best way in her mind.

One of the masters a few seats down spoke next, “Yes, and one of those things was finding someone to be suited with the title of Sorcerer Supreme in your sudden absence.” They were less subtle going forward and you weren’t sure if you appreciated that or not. Their hands remained folded in front of them as they continued. “Stephen Strange was appointed Sorcerer Supreme in your place. We are here today to give our verdict on who will maintain that title going forward.”

At this revelation, you closed your eyes, taking a second to let the words sink in. Again, logical choices that you could bring no fault to, but as you ran your thumb over the face of your pocket watch in your pants, something began to stink.

While you had been gone for the last half a decade, and you truthfully couldn’t have known what transpired between then and now, you knew one thing: none of this was supposed to happen…but you couldn’t specifically remember why. There was a sudden haziness to your memories that unsettled you.

You simply stood quiet as you listened to them deliberate. Though you had been gone and more than likely behind on mystical affairs, it wasn’t really your fault or intention that you’d been essentially dead for five years.

Some wanted to keep you on, being chosen by the late ancient one herself and wanting to honor that. You’d done especially well as Sorcerer Supreme. Others viewed this to be a moot point as the cycle of Sorcerer Supreme continues with or without you there, and it’d be tedious to catch you up to speed when they already had someone appointed that didn’t need such things. Your eyes were brought back to Stephen, who carefully kept his gaze from meeting yours.

“While we’ve honored and appreciated L/n’s work as the Sorcerer Supreme, the world has changed much while they were…away. The physical and the spiritual plaine have been set off kilter by The Snap five years ago. We need the Sorcerer Supreme to help guide that hand, and preferably one who has seen the damage firsthand.”

“While I agree, Y/n L/n was appointed Sorcerer Supreme by the Ancient One herself who taught them to lead this role, and it was of understanding that the current Sorcerer Supreme was to choose the next. While Dr. Strange’s work is also appreciated a great value, there are also those that see it as no longer necessary now that the rightfully appointed is back. Informing L/n of the current state of affairs is but a small price to pay in their unexpected disappearance.”

“Need we all be reminded how this “disappearance” occurred in the first place? I think we all are aware that it was also Y/n L/n’s duty as Sorcerer Supreme to protect the time stone, and somehow the Mad Titan, Thanos, acquired it without issue. Their incompetence led to not only their disappearance, but half of the population! It was Stephen Strange who tried to fit everything back together with some success before everyone was brought back. I believe the choice is obvious,”

“Well, Dr. Y/n L/n, how do you plead in this course of events?”

How do you plead?

This wasn’t a discussion or even a fair trial. This was more like an arraignment.

Why were things playing out this way, as if the very snap was your fault? You recall going to Titan and having the plan go smoothly, you could see Tony Stark and his spider-powered charge making headway getting the gauntlet off of Thanos’ hand. You even remember getting ready to subdue Peter Quill to stop the stupid decision you knew he was gearing up to make.

Everything was working until it wasn’t.

You’d somehow lost focus as you’d felt the shift that came with not having the time stone on your person. You lost the time stone. How did you lose the time stone?

Your eyes flitted to Stephen as you tried to get your mind to cooperate with your mouth as it felt almost like trying to wade through a pool of molasses. Something fucking stinks.

“While I cannot excuse the loss of the time stone, I can only assure you that my integrity as the Sorcerer Supreme, as merely a user of the Mystic Arts rather, that it will never happen again naturally. The circumstances were grave and cannot all be placed on one individual, but they occurred in part because of me, and I accept the consequences that come with oversight that happened on my part. I would-”

Someone's trying to speak through you.

You stopped to take a deep breath to refocus and gain control. “.... I would also like to bring to mind that the rest of my actions during my time as Sorcerer Supreme go unnamed and uncredited while they are overshadowed by this singular lapse in judgment. Even before knowing the state of things at present, ensuring the safety and stability of our world was the first thing I took to after the battle with Thanos was over. Several issues that were left to fester, in my absence I assume, were handled efficiently. I assure you my absence has not hindered my ability on that front. I simply wish to continue my role as the Sorcerer Supreme in whatever form that takes and bring things to rights now that I’m present. That is all I can ask of any of you.”

While you were able to cut whatever ventriloquist act was going on short, you couldn’t double back now. But you did offer some sort of truth by the end. You see Stephen’s eye twitch out of the corner of your eye. Him with a few other masters were unsettled with the latter half of your statement while others seemed to genuinely think this over. With your statement given, you merely had to wait while the rest of the Mystic Arts users decided. Your head was only somewhat clearer than it had been by the time you got there, and the more it cleared up, the angrier you got.

But even that felt subdued while you were in the temple.

‘What the actual fuck is going on?’

As that question occurred to you, the door to the main corridor was opened by none other than Stephen Strange, and you were almost certain that he was a key player in your plight.

Stephen simply stepped to the side as he held the door open for you to pass through, “We’ve reached a verdict.”

You heaved one more sigh as you made your way back to the main room. By now the outcome was already a foregone conclusion, and maybe that’s why you couldn’t be bothered to fight harder. Everything seemed to cast you in dim lighting, and what were you to do about it?

Why couldn’t you fight harder?

You just walked to the center of the room awaiting the words you knew were coming.

“Everyone that is present, as Masters of the Mystic Arts, have come to the decision that Stephen Strange will fulfill the role of Sorcerer Supreme. Y/n L/n, you, still recognized as a fellow Master of the Mystic Arts and gifted sorcerer, are implored to teach the next of us here at Kamar Taj to be of use-” The rest of whatever shpiel was white noise as you took in their words.

Be of use…

Is that all they cared about?

Surely you weren’t the only one that knew something didn’t sit right. While you’d been made to wait for hours as the council went back and forth their view on the entire matter made it all feel like padded time. Was no one considering the fact that this entire "trial" felt so fucking empty? Why couldn’t you put it into words.

You know things weren’t supposed to be this way.

The green glow by your hip drew your attention to the now empty Eye of Agamotto on your belt. Its glow subtlety made its way up to your temples and passed through your ears with a new sense of clarity. Vague confusion became clear anger as you realized your words were purposefully getting caught in your throat, having to listen to an incomplete verdict. Not being allowed to speak at your own sentencing, for lack of a better term, was probably just what they wanted anyhow.

You stood stock still with a mask of neutrality as you waited for this meeting to be over. They need nothing else from you; You don’t have the time stone anymore, and the third Eye of Agamotto chose you. Its scope of power was outside any of their purview anyways, today only served to prove that.

As the meeting wrapped soon after, everyone began to filter out of the main room to leave, you being one of the last.

You felt a small pat on your shoulder.

“Hang in there, Y/n.”

Looking at the back of Stephen’s head as he made his way out, you didn’t hesitate to kick him in the back. There was only one thing left on your mind as that anger you felt bubbling up came back with a vengeance. “This was all you!”

Stephen, now on the ground, turned onto his side to look up at you, his gaze was almost a smug indifference that made you want to tear it right off of his face. “Look, Y/n, if this is about Christine, it was her choice. That had nothing to do-”

“Don’t try and feed me that bullshit, Strange! You preyed on her vulnerability at my ‘supposed’ death, you piece of shit!” You slammed another bout of kicks into his exposed side as the situation became all too clear. “You gave Thanos the fucking time stone! You got rid of half the goddamn planet, you got rid of me, so you could finally get what you so badly wanted, Stephen! You couldn’t leave well enough alone! You couldn’t stand that someone was naturally beating you at life that you had to go and royally fuck it over so that you, Dr. Stephen Strange, can come out on top!”

“I’m sorry that you feel that way Y/n, even if you have sich a distorted memory of those events. But what’s done is done. We can’t change the past, but we can continue to move forward in the present. I hope that you are able to do that with time, L/n.” The manufactured sympathy wasn’t lost on you. The calm and placating voice he used to mock you seemed to echo as he finally left the main room with an air of superiority.

Watching the doors come together leaving you by yourself, you let out a scream of frustration as your head rested in your hands. You took a look around the hall. You felt your emotions wash over you as the events from the past few days crashed on top of you and knocked you down. The anguish, the confusion, the anger, the sadness. All of it amounts to this foreign, grating feeling of helplessness.

Your eyes stayed to the floor as you mulled over what you would do next, and one thing became clear: You wouldn’t stay here.

You flexed your fingers at your sides as you began to think quick on your feet, they wouldn’t leave you alone for long if they were smart.

Making a small formation with your hands, two portals appeared in a ray of green sparks, one significantly smaller than the other. Taking off your sling ring, you tossed it into the smaller portal leading to a pocket dimension. Facing the bigger portal, you didn’t hesitate to walk through.

You were thrust into the new environs of Romania, close to the Carpathian Mountains.

Looking up, you saw the sun just starting its descent as you looked for any people around. Finding none, you released a quick sigh of relief. Heading toward the mountains to prepare for nightfall, you felt an odd spike of energy.

Magic specifically.

It wasn’t a signature that you recognized all too well, so you weighed your chances. Worst case scenario, they’ll be associated with any of the people you left in Kamar Taj which seems unlikely. They could attack you too, but you could handle them quick enough if you had to. Best case: You get some supplies from a random magic user and go about your way. With your mind made up, you made your way closer to the source of the magic signature.

-----

By the time the sky had gone from peachy orange to plum purple, you’d reached an isolated cabin. Your footfalls quiet, you made sure to conceal your own signature as you made it to the door. Knocking lightly on it a good few times, you stood waiting for someone to answer. No reason not to put your best foot forward.

Eventually, you heard movement from inside before the door slowly opened up revealing someone you didn’t think you’d be seeing anytime soon. “Ms. Maximoff?”

Her own eyebrows furrowed as she took in who was standing in front of her. “Y/n? Y/n L/n?”

Slowly nodding, you looked behind you needlessly to see if there was anyone else behind you before focusing back on her. “Yes, can I come in?”

Wanda also looked out her door to see if there was anyone with you before stepping aside to let you in. “Please.”

Looking around as you walked through, you breathed some warmth into your hands coming from outside. Wanda directed you to a couch as she only stared after you for a second, still confused and even cautious. You hadn’t seen each other since the battle with Thanos as you found yourselves fighting alongside each other.

Wanda idly stoked the fire in the hearth with the poker while her eyes were far away, her mind running quickly in a moment of anxiety. Were you here to issue your own punishment to her for what she did in Westview? Would she be going to a high security prison again? She would have to after all that she’s done. No one would be satisfied with less.

Wanda thought she’d gone far enough away to be left alone and for her to rid the public of her presence, lest they think ill of her owning a house on a row-home corner. When Wanda made her cabin here, she figured it was perfect. She was as close as she could be to home with Sokovia having been blown to bits years ago.

You watched as Wanda Eventually settled in her own seat on the couch, leveling you with her own gaze. “You’ll have to forgive me for the sudden appearance, Ms. Maximoff. I didn’t even know that I’d wind up here really,”

Wanda merely gave a bit of a forced laugh through her nose as she used a waiting tea kettle to refill her cup while red wisps brought another cup out presumably from her kitchen area. “Only if you forgive the lack of hospitality I’ve been able to prepare.”

You let the corner of your lips pull upward as you took the now filled cup of tea, cradling it for more heat to run through your cold hands. “Done.”

-----

There was a common ground between the two of you: You had no one else. You found out that Wanda was behind the incident in Westview, New Jersey as well as why the incident occurred in the first place. Apparently “dealt with” meant they just lost her when she went MIA from the scene. Wanda Maximoff had your sympathies beforehand, but it feels like the world is especially cruel to a select few.

After you explained what had happened in your life recently, Wanda felt a similar bout of sympathy, and she allowed you to stay at her cabin. Her hesitation at you being there all but went away the more the two of you began to talk.

As the weeks turned into months, you and Wanda had come to make your own piece of peace with each other in this cabin and an easy friendship was born between the two of you. Willfully living life without using your powers substantially was a much-needed respite for the both of you. It almost helped remind the both of you that you were human first.

You'd taken to putting together a farm and orchard. It was tiring work and successfully growing them was even more so, but it felt just as rewarding. You eventually used your own sorcery to keep livestock in their designated area to graze in while also helping tutor Wanda disguise and eventually remove her own magic signature so that neither she nor the cabin would be found by others.

You were content...for the most part.

The longer you stayed in the cabin, the more your mind filled with thoughts and memories of Christine.

This newfound experience of domestic bliss you had with Wanda was welcome but mocking at the same time. Taunting you of all the things you could have done with Christine; the simpler things that were few and far between.

~~~

Giving the pot a final stir, you cut off the heat of the stove before feeling two arms wrap loosely around your waist. You give a brief laugh through your nose before looking over your shoulder to catch the eye of the auburn-haired woman. “Yes, can I help you, Chrissy?”

Christine gave you a brief squeeze, “That depends: Are you still holding the kitchen on lockdown?”

You gave her an exaggerated noise of agitation, “I’m simply trying to make us a perfect dinner. If you want half ass we can still order out-”

Christine placed a few quick kisses on your cheek, “Now I never said that. Spaghetti’s never smelt so good, Y/n/n.”

You let out a small thank you with a grumble as Christine moved away to grab plates and utensils for the both of you.

It was the end of your first week in the new house after unpacking. The both of you were still getting used to the new layout and where everything was when you decided to make dinner for the two of you.

Christine made sure to show you her appreciation later that night...

~~~

It was seven months after you’d started staying With Wanda that you’d discussed actually going into the local market to get other supplies and groceries for the cabin. For you, it was all a part of doing things without jumping to using your powers like you had been. Initially, anyway.

There was a darkness that you couldn’t seem to slip out of while you were here, being reminded of you and Christine together and happy, only to remember that she was married and happy to Stephen Strange on the opposite end of the planet.

You just wanted to have a reason to step out and clear your head now and again. You chocked it up to going stir crazy.

Wanda was immediately against this to begin with, not wanting to risk a single appearance in the public.

You set down the drying cloth on the counter as you put the last clean dish away, having just ate dinner together. “I just think it’s something we can consider at this point. Get into a new sense of normalcy, you know?” You kept your eyes trained on the empty sink as you heard Wanda's movements become stunted.

Wanda’s relaxed mood was almost immediately choked out by your proposition, “No. Absolutely not.”

You could feel her want to leave both the room and the conversation, but you pushed it forward still. “Wanda, hear me out please,” You knew she would react this way, practically expected it, and kept a steady stance.

Wanda stared across the kitchen island at you with her head tilted, her palms resting flat on the surface of the island. “We’re not doing this, Y/n and We’ve talked about this before. I’m not giving anyone any kind of fuel to have the public hate me any more than they already do. End of discussion.”

You kept your voice level as you too leaned on the granite top. “You don’t even have to come with me, Wands. At the very least I want to do this for myself.”

“No, you’re not going either! You have people actively looking for you too, Y/n!”

“They won’t find me out here, you know what I’m capable of Wanda. I’m just asking you to trust me.”

“I do trust you-- I just-” She releases an unexpectedly shaky breath as she leans back on the cool metal of the fridge behind her. Her eyes shut as her arms cross tightly over her chest as if she’s hugging herself.

You come around to stand directly in front of the redhead with your hands resting on her shoulders. You watch as she takes a couple of breaths before tilting her head downward, looking at the ground.

“You are my best friend Y/n, my only friend that's still around. I trust you more than I have most people in my life. It’s everyone else that I don’t trust-- that I…I can’t trust. Not right now. I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you.”

You bring Wanda into an embrace as your thumb runs up and down on her back in a calming gesture.

And you didn’t bring it up again.

You understand Wanda’s worry- Wanda’s fear, and it wasn’t necessarily unfounded. Wanda has quite literally lost everything trying to trust in others, and for her, the safest hands her loved ones can be are her own. That’s not something you can just will away. Wanda would have to come around to the idea on her own, and that was something you were willing to forget about.

—----------

A few more months went by, and the leaves began to fall again. You were behind the cabin making your rounds in the pasture. Currently wheeling out the chicken feed, you slowed your pace when you saw Wanda make her way out of the cabin.

You could tell Wanda was a bit uneasy as she made her way up to you. “Everything alright, Wanda?” Her movements were a bit jerky, hesitant as she nodded briefly.

Wanda didn’t know how to go about the conversation she wanted to start, “...We have an excess from the harvest again, don’t we?” It wasn’t a surprise or even a real question; there was always excess.

You carefully set the wheelbarrow off to the side, “Yeah. I still have to place all the extra in another pocket dimension like usual. I’ll probably do that after I finish up here,”

“You aren’t worried it’s going to waste, wherever you put them?”

“Mm, sometimes. I try and remember to cast preservation protectants on everything before it goes in. No big deal.”

Wanda knew how you felt about things as they were now. You trusted her enough to not have your mental barrier fortified all the time.

Wanda knew this sort of monotonous routine was eating away at you.

You thought about Christine Palmer more than you cared to admit out loud. What you'd had together was something you didn’t think you’d ever find again, and it was almost cruel how you were trapped with those memories.

A sort of malice began to build up inside, and it upset Wanda to see you that way. Even if you hardly showed it.

This cabin was supposed to be a peaceful place where you both found solace, and yet, that was getting corrupted for you more and more.

Wanda looked in the direction of the small barn, “Maybe you could see if the locals would take them. At the markets, I mean.” Maybe more room to stretch your legs or even new scenery would help you.

Your eyes widened at Wanda’s idea, “Are you sure, Wands? That’s not necessary, really-”

Turning to rest a hand on your forearm, Wanda stopped you from rambling on. “I’m sure, Y/n. A new sense of normalcy, remember? That’s all this is.”

It took a bit more reassurance from Wanda before you conceded and grabbed a heavier coat while she got a few crates together for you to take along with you to the open market.

Wanda double checked everything for you before sending you on your way, telling you to at least be home by five.

Watching you head off into the sea of trees, Wanda cradles her cup of tea closer to herself, resisting the urge to call you back as soon as she couldn't see you anymore.

Wanda had no desire to visit other people, but that didn’t mean she’d deprive you of the opportunity. She was also worried for your mental state that seemed to get worse under the surface. You’d been nothing but understanding of her, offering to help her through her own plights. Wanda could definitely do the same for you on this front, especially when all you seemed to want was space from familiar surroundings. Even if that small want was enough to scare her.

And even further; the thought that her fear wasn’t misplaced.

—-------------------

You move around people with practiced ease as you make your way through the smaller marketplace, it being more full than usual due to the upcoming holidays. Even with all the customers around, you made your way to the back of a specific stall.

You tried not to spend too much time here any other week, but you were cutting it a bit close today with all the pedestrian traffic.

Reaching your destination, you went around the back of Octav’s shop. This was the most reliable vendor you found in the marketplace to drop off your goods. Octav was a plump old man who never asked too many questions and ran his shop like a well-oiled machine.

You set the two full crates down, “Octav, you and the wife doin’ alright?” You made small talk as you passed the man your crates over the counter.

“We’re good. Our daughter and her family are coming down in a few weeks for holidays.” He would unload your goods and then refill them with his own wares for you to take back to the cabin.

“Well, I know there are a few chickens in there, a lot of produce too. You should really show out to the family; Have a big dinner and all that.”

Octav passed the crates back to you with a small smile and a nod. “My Vena will like that, she likes cooking.” He was never much of a talker.

You give a quick nod back, “Well I’m off, have a good one Octav. Be seeing you,”

“Wait”

You turn your head to look back at the older man, a brow raised in confusion. He gestures for you to come closer with a small hand movement. quickly checking around you, you get closer to his market stall.

Octav places a hand on your shoulder, “There was a man looking for you the other day,” he spoke in a lower voice, his English was highly accented and slightly choppy.

Your eyes narrowed at the counter as you took in what the vendor said. In a way you should’ve expected this. You didn’t notice yourself getting sloppy, but who’s to say Strange didn’t have people checking every crevice they could find.

“What’d they look like?”

“He wore an odd getup with a big red cape. gray hair on the sides with a goatee, pretty tall. Very American.” Stange. Of fucking course.

“He was alone, asked everyone if we’d seen someone who looked enough like you that I just let him pass on through. He made a big stink of things too.”

You let out a sigh as you rubbed the space between your eyebrows trying to relieve the headache that was bound to start. Looking back up at Octav, you set the two crates on the ground. You kept your hand out of view as you made a quick portal to your pocket dimension, the crates easily dropping into it.

You adjusted the cap on your head to sit a bit lower, throwing the hood of your jacket up as well. The last thing you need to do is panic or draw attention to yourself. Blend in and get to safety first.

Octav merely watched you with a glint of concern in his eyes, “Are you in trouble with that man, Y/n?”

You stopped rooting through your pocket for a second, “Something like that- hey look. Thanks for letting me know. I’ll be alright but listen, you get home safe Octavy, it’s just starting to get dark out here. Give Vena and the family a hug for me will ya? I gotta get goin’.” You made sure to thicken your Romanian pronunciation as you finally got your pocket watch out to check the time. 5:27. You’re already late getting back.

Turning to head out of the market, the last thing you catch the old man murmur was a quick “be safe” before you made your way to the edge of the market square.

You had to think this through. If Strange was roaming around this area looking for you, it would only be a matter of time before he found Wanda and the cabin, magic signature or not. He could be thorough like that. Stephen Strange was stupid, but he wasn’t dumb. If Strange found Wanda he more than likely would take her in to punish her further for the Westview incident, and you simply weren’t willing to let that happen to your friend.

Stephen Strange was here to get you, and he would get only you.

There wasn’t a way to avoid being found without raising further suspicion in the area with a zero-energy signature area of land that simply wasn’t there before. There was no way out of this.

You could almost feel the presence following you before you stopped in a clearing. “Don’t waste my time, Strange. Your cloaking has always been shit.” You looked over your shoulder as you watched Stephen appear a ways away. His eyes narrowed on yours with a clenched jaw. “What a year will do to you, those frown lines are much deeper than they were before.”

You were making your way to the smaller wooded area, not too far from the market entrance, where you cloaked a Waystone to get back to the cabin to alert Wanda when you stopped short of uncovering it...

You dug around in your pocket and grasped a small roll of paper you kept in your coat in case of emergency. Rolling it between your thumb and middle fingers, you inconspicuously flicked the paper at the travel-point instead before you changed course walking away from the Waystone and further into the woods. He’s already here. Wanda needs to get clear and quickly.

His glare was unwavering, “All the stress from work if I had to guess.”

You let out an empty hum as you faced forward again. You heard him take a few steps toward you. “I’m not going back, Strange. I feel like you know that.” You could feel your powers surging from within, ready to defend yourself.

Stephen let out an exasperated breath as his own powers were licking at his palms. “Can we skip the dialogue and quit the running Y/n? Seems it’s all you ever do these days.”

A smile crept over your face, but there was no warmth behind it as you turned to face the ‘Sorcerer Supreme’. “Well, here I am. Not running.”

There was a stillness in the air as you both anticipated the other striking. When you saw Strange blink was when you struck him with your own magic. There was no wind up required as your Eye of Agamotto, still fastened to your hip, crackled to life. Green lightning hit him hard and fast, knocking the sorcerer backward. You hit him with three more in quick succession as you carefully angled yourself further and further away from the cabin.

It had to only be you.

Strange began to retaliate with his own strikes to try and gain the upper hand. It wasn’t fully effective, the attacks only pushing you back bit by bit…Like he was holding back….

This almost felt like a-

You were blindsided as another portal appeared by your head as an unexpected Wong came flying out and leveled you with a full force kick to the temple, knocking you out instantly.

As you slumped on the ground, Stephen came to stand above you, his face twisted in a grimace before he looked at Wong. “That could have killed them, you know?” He was uneasy, but there wasn’t any real heat behind his words.

Wong also looked down at your limp form, “It was the quickest way. They would have gotten away otherwise.” He quickly used his sling ring to make a portal to Kamar Taj, Strange following after him.

Stephen turned to face your body and used his own sorcery to lift and bring you through the portal before it closed.

With nothing but a note, Wanda was left safe and sound...and alone once again.

~~~

You and Christine laid together in bed, you on your stomach and Christine on her back. Her nails running up and down your back mindlessly as you both just talked softly and enjoyed each other’s company.

“These moments with you are the ones that I love the most.”

grabbing her free hand, you intertwined your fingers together before kissing them. “Me too,”

You felt the pace of Christine’s nails slow down, “It’s a shame we won’t be able to have any more of them.”

Your brows furrowed before turning to face Christine as she still has that same small smile on her face. “What’re you talking about?”

Christine’s face only showed confusion at your response, “I’m with Stephen now. We won’t have any of this anymore. It would be me and him”

“You and Stephen?”

“Yeah, he and I are married now. Don’t you remember?”

Abruptly the scene began to change as the walls around you became darker, the bed became bigger. You didn’t recognize any of the pictures hanging on the walls anymore.

You could feel your world beginning to fall in on itself as your heart rate hit an uptick. “Wait, it wasn’t supposed to be like this! We were- I was!-” there were so many things that you wanted to say- needed to say.

Christine had a sympathetic smile on her face now, everything just felt cold. “I know, Y/n/n, but-”

The doorknob to your shared bedroom began to turn, and through the open door came the last person you ever wanted to see.

“Oh, back already, honey?” Something twisted in your chest when you saw Christine’s face light up when her eyes rested on Stephen Strange.

His answering smile was coy, and one you wanted to erase from his face forever. “I just went to light the fireplace; it wasn’t that long.”

All you felt was cold. Why was it so fucking cold?

~~~

Suddenly it was as if you were having an out of body experience, moving further and further away from Christine. A bystander in your own nightmare, you couldn’t look away nor would your eyes shut as Christine brought Stephen in for a deep kiss while maintaining eye contact with you. You were made to watch as Stephen Strange ruined Christine in every way for you. You could almost feel the warmth she had for you dissipating as she grew further and further away from you until she was gone.

Ah... That's why you felt so cold.

You woke up in a cell of sorts. Looking around, you recognized the artifacts around the larger room: You were under the main temple of Kamar Taj.

The cell was reinforced with magic that you couldn’t break through, not for lack of trying. Your Eye of Agamotto was still on your person, not that anyone else could remove it anyhow. The cell would almost fight back as it threw your own magic at you. Soon enough, you heard the familiar hiss of a portal appearing as you watched Stephen Strange step through.

Your face immediately set into a scowl as you watched him come closer. “What do you even want with me now, Strange? You’re already the Sorcerer Supreme.”

Stephen’s face was kept neutral as he stood in front of your cell. “The knowledge of the Sorcerer Supreme is unique in that there are things only they know. They pass this knowledge onto the next Sorcerer Supreme before they die and so on. You’ve caused a bit of a hiccup in this cycle,”

Your eyes rolled to the ceiling, “I would say sorry for living, but I fear that it wouldn’t be giving a genuine apology.”

Stephen continued like you hadn’t spoken. “We’ve all come to the conclusion that since you hold sacred knowledge that you can’t just be left to your own devices, as recent developments would have you placed as a risk to the natural and mystic world. All of us at Kamar Taj have discussed how to proceed with your presence here going forward. One option was to simply fix the cycle and have you die-”

“Sounds lovely, honestly,”

“-The other was to have you live out your days here at Kamar Taj and put your knowledge as former Sorcerer Supreme to good use and teach and assist the other students here in the mystic arts as, regrettably, you know things that even I do not. You have proven too volatile to be left to yourself, so you will stay here. This is the best-case scenario that I could persuade the other masters to compromise on.”

“Mmm…Dying still sounds pretty compelling,”

You could tell Stephen was fed up with you, “Would you just listen?! This isn’t a joke Y/n-”

You abruptly stood up, marching straight up to the barrier separating you and Strange. “No, it IS! It honestly is! You cannot be serious right now. This offer I’m meant to leap at because I get to live! I get to live on fucking house arrest in a place I hardly recognize! I get to clean up more messes of ingrates and tutor you on how to do your job in a position that you shouldn’t even hold! Do not come and propose this ‘ideal compromise’ to me as if you did not orchestrate the fucking disintegration of my entire life! Every single piece of goddamn happiness was ripped away from me! By YOU!”

You throw your hands in the air, green sparks fly all around your cell as you unceremoniously fall back onto the ground. Stephen says nothing as he looks at you with a stare that almost reads as regret before it’s gone.

You stare blankly at the ceiling, “Go to hell and stay there, Stephen Strange.”

Without another word, Stephen leaves the room.

If you were lucky, they would just put you out of your misery and be done with it.

But of course you weren’t.

You were kept alive and in your cell like a trapped animal.

You almost felt like the magic mirror or the genie in a bottle. Others came down to see you in latch ditch efforts to fix problems beyond their ability, Stephen more often than not was the one to see you.

You didn’t teach anyone, and maybe that was for the better. You’d been relegated to the scary monster in the basement that others were warned to stay away from. Any sane or rational person would ask why, it wasn’t like you were a criminal. All it did was isolate you further.

And with that isolation came anger.

Came resentment.

You committed no crime and here you were. Made to be a prisoner of life when life had nothing left to offer you. It was like some sick joke. Too dangerous to live but still too valuable to be killed outright.

The Sorcerer Supreme was recently called away with a disturbance in New York, so you hadn’t seen him much. Maybe that was to his own benefit.

In your time alone you were almost haunted by the happy memories that you had, and your mind kept coming back to Christine. How content both of you were with each other until Stephen Strange ruined it all. The reality of things was thrown in your face every time you looked at where you were; every time you looked at the simple band on Strange’s ring finger.

Resignation soon turned into malice. And it continued to grow the longer you were in the presence of Doctor Stephen Strange. Memories gone by became dreams of watching the light leave Strange’s body, falling limp and lifeless. These dreams were what fed you.

There was a familiar magic signature that pulled you out of your stupor as you sat up. What’s going on now?

You ran your thumb over the cracked face of your pocket watch as you heard rapid footsteps above you. Thinking about Christine was pain, but a sort of numbness set in. You couldn’t blame her for how things turned out between the two of you, but you could definitely blame him.

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