#...i just wanna die. idk. not really. i mostly just want this pain to stop. i want to like. recover for a bit. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

divinerulerluvr · 3 years

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Womanizer

Summary - Warren Lipka picks you up after studying to have some fun and buy time.

Warnings - basic smut with a bit of a pain kink, breeding kink, that's the main things idk what else to advise you about.

A/N - I feel we need more warren shit on tumblr since he is arguably one of Evan's best characters outside of ahs. this fic has nothing to do with the plot of American animals so no spoilers ahead.

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Warren’s car comes speeding down the road, skidding to a stop where i stand on the sidewalk.The window was rolled down, letting me see his pretty face. “Hiya there, stranger,” he jokes, a smile on his lips.

Chuckling, i walk around the car and get into the passenger side. It was late at night and i had just finished studying for my exam on Monday and who better to call at two in the morning on a Friday than Warren?

The moment I had buckled my seatbelt, Warren drove off. He always drove like he was in a car chase. It scares me sometimes but we’ve never been pulled over or gotten into a crash.

His music plays loudly, only making him drive faster. He tends to get lost in the moment. “What were you studying this time?” he asks, looking over to me as he pulls up to an abandoned intersection at a stoplight.

“The uh, Stonewall Riot of 1969,” I answer, looking over to meet his eyes. My minor was in Social Justice so of course, the Stonewall Riot was a topic we’d talk about. “Cool. That chick who was like, the leader of the riots was cool,” Warren replies, driving again when the hue of the green light filled the dark car.

I just nod, looking out my window. It was late at night so not a lot of people were out on the roads. The occasional drunk person or car was all you could spot. “Where do you wanna go?” he asks me.

It was always a dreaded question. Warren knew this, that’s why he always hesitated to ask. Sometimes he’d just drive around with no destination in mind because we had nowhere to go or be. I never wanted to go home and neither did he.

“I don’t know,” I say with a heavy sigh. Warren pulls into an abandoned parking lot, screeching the car to a stop and putting it in park. He grabs something out of the cup holder and I see he holds a joint.

He lights it, inhaling it first before offering it to me. “I stopped smoking weed,” I turn down. Warren smiles, a look of playful shock in his eyes. “My god, Y/n. Repenting, I see,” he jokes, taking another hit on the joint.

“I hope you don’t think you’re better than me now,” he comments, leaning back in his seat. He turns down the music a bit, silencing ‘Piano Man’ by Billy Joel. “How's college?” Warren asks me, his eyes studying my face.

The only source of light was from the dim street lamp that Warren had parked next to. I shrug, my lips pressed together. “Fine. Stressful but I can handle it,” I answer, resting my head back on the seat.

“You look tired,” Warren notices, his eyes evaluating my face like I was some complex math equation. I chuckle weakly. “Thank you for that,”

“College is bullshit, anyway. All the famous and rich people dropped out of high school. Let alone graduated college,” Warren tries to comfort. “All you need to succeed is money and charisma. And to be honest, Y/n, you’re already halfway there,”

I turn my head to look at him, a small smile spreading on my lips. “You think I’m charismatic?” I ask. Warren nods, exhaling smoke from his joint out of his rolled-down window. “Charisma is mostly how attractive you are and the other half is being nice so, yeah,”

“That is the nicest thing I think you have ever said, Lipka,” I say, almost surprised by his compliment. He chuckles, shaking his head as he looks away from me. “The weed makes me nice,” he excuses.

“I have to agree,”

“You are very pretty though,” Warren states, his voice lowered with affection. I turn my head back to face him, seeing the forlorn look in his dark eyes as he looks at me. “You’re pretty, too,” I compliment in return, reaching out and twirling a strand of his shaggy, brown hair around my finger.

Warren places his hand on my thigh in return, his eyes heavy on mine as his thumb rubs small circles on my inner thigh. “Third hookup of the month?” Warren suggests.

“That’d be the last one and it’s only the sixteenth,” I reply. He and I had this rule that since we were friends with benefits that we got three hookups a month. It keeps order in our friend group. Warren sighs, a look of disappointment on his face. “So?”

I roll my eyes playfully, feeling his hand creep further up my thigh and closer to my core. “Fine,” I say as if I were tired of arguing but in reality, I really wanted it as well. He leans over the center console of the car, his lips locking with mine without hesitation.

Kissing back, my fingers tangle in his hair as his fingers rub my clit lightly through the fabric of my pants. I moan into the kiss, my free hand going to his dick and palming him through his jeans.

Warren pulls from the kiss first, his eyes dark with lust and his cheeks red. “Backseat,” he instructs vaguely. With a simple nod, I crawl into the backseat, already taking off my leggings and tee shirt as he joins me in the backseat.

I help him take off his shirt, running my hand up his toned torso, feeling his warm skin. He does the same to me, his hand running down my bare leg. He lays me across the seats, pulling my panties off in one clean motion before settling between my legs.

Our lips meet again, my hands on his face to deepen the kiss. The kiss was hot and desperate. Sex with him was always like this. Like he was going to die if he didn’t fuck me in the next five minutes.

Warren was a very impatient man. Which causes for hot and oh so unholy sex.

His hand travels down between our bodies, slipping under my bra and playing with my breasts. I arch my back, my moans silenced by his lips. The car was already getting hot, causing a thin sheen of sweat to break out on our skin.

My hands go to his pants out of habit, undoing the zipper to his jeans easily. Pulling them down, I pull back the waistband to his boxers to let his dick out. I feel him smile into the kiss, impressed with my eagerness. He didn’t even have to make a snide comment about it, I just knew he was thinking it.

His hands move down my body, stopping at my hips where he holds me in place so he can push into me. His lips leave him, his eyes admiring the way my mouth falls agape as I feel his dick inside of me.

My legs wrap around his waist, my nails digging into the skin of his shoulder blades as he bottoms out inside me. He pushes some hair out of my face, stalling any movements to help me adjust.

“You look so pretty with me inside of you, pup,” he says, his lips grazing over mine in a taunting way. I whimper, a shudder running through my body as he moves his hips just so slightly. “Oh, you want more?” he asks teasingly.

I nod eagerly, giving him my best puppy dog eyes to hopefully make him cave. He runs his thumb over my lower lip before pushing it into my mouth. I gladly accept it, sucking on his thumb as he pulls his hips back and thrusts into me roughly.

I screw my eyes shut, my walls clenching as Warren sets a fast and relentless pace right away. My wetness made it easy for him, as he likes to say. Any noises I made were muffled by his thumb in my mouth.

My stomach tightens in knots as pleasure floods over me. Warren pulls his thumb from my mouth, his eyes on mine as he admires his work. Tears gather in my eyes, my skin hot to touch. He caresses my cheek, his hand falling down to my neck where he drags his nails down my neck and trails down to my breasts.

A whimper falls from my lips, my hips bucking to meet his as he continues to fuck me into oblivion. “Warren,” I moan weakly, my voice dripping with submission.

A groan leaves his lips, his eyes closing briefly as he indulges in his own pleasure. “You feel so good, baby. You’re such a good girl,” he praises, his words sending more arousal through my body.

I run my fingers through his hair, our eyes locked. Warren loves to keep eye contact during sex. Says that seeing the look on my face was better than the sex itself.

Already close to my orgasm, Warren runs his hand between our bodies, his fingers locating my clit effortlessly and rubbing slow circles on it to double my pleasure. I moan out, my eyes falling shut again as I bask in the feeling.

Warren removes his hand from my clit, moving to snake under my back so he could flip me around so we were now in doggy style. He quickly resumes his thrusts, hitting deeper inside of me than prior.

I rest my hand on the fogged-up window for stability, my head thrown back. Warren’s fingers tangle in my hair, pulling a handful of it. I cry out weakly, his grip on my hair being painful. Using my hair as leverage, he leans back as he fucks me roughly.

Right on the edge of an orgasm, I hold back knowing that Warren liked to make sex last due to my three times a month rule.

Using every ounce of willpower to repress my orgasm, my walls clench around his dick tightly. “Aww, is my baby gonna cum?” Warren asks in a mocking tone, just his mere words making me want to give up my fruitless battle.

I just nod, a pathetic moan leaving my lips as his fingers dig into my hips. “Go ahead, I give you permission,” he allows. With a sigh of relief, I give up everything and let the pleasure take over. With one last cry of his name, I’m falling apart.

The only way to explain an orgasm from Warren was like being able to sit down after running for days and days on end.

My entire body shakes and I find myself relying on his grip on my hips to keep me up. Soft pants leave my lips as my ears ring, my eyes screwed closed as pressure from my veins releases itself all at once.

Warren fucks me through my orgasm, leaving me a shaky mess as he cums inside of me. Ceasing his thrusting, he carefully pulls out of me, running his finger through my soaked slit to admire his work.

Panting, I sit back down on the seat, pulling my panties back on. “Shit. I gotta get to a bathroom now,” I huff, suddenly very aware of how uncomfortable having his cum in me would be. Warren smiles charmingly, shrugging. “Everything’s closed,”

I sigh, getting back into the front seat and pull on the rest of my clothes. Warren follows behind me, pulling his shirt back on as he puts the car into drive. I lean back in my seat, still catching my breath as Warren skirts out of the dark parking lot and onto the main road.

“Just don’t tell my boyfriend, ‘kay?”

“As always, friend,”

#evan peters #warren lipka #ahs #american animals #smut #fic #kai anderson #james patrick march #tate langdon #kit walker

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eligaxy · 3 years

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Wind

☆ℜ𝔢𝔩𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫𝔰𝔥𝔦𝔭 : Venti x gn!Reader

☆𝔚𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰 : near death experience, you’re confused asf about everything, bad writing cause i suck, spoilers for the we will be reunited quest!! And also for venti’s backstory, venti is serious for once (yes it’s a legitimate warning🤚)

☆𝔊𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢 : Some angst, some fluff? Idk bye🤨

☆𝔖𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶 : "It's okay, it's over now" he kneeled to be at your level, his arms still wrapped around you, and you didn't have the energy to fight your urge of nuzzling into him. "I'll always be here for you, wherever there is wind, remember I'm here too. You only need to ask." (2.8k words)

♪𝔑𝔬𝔱𝔢𝔰 : i’m an idiot simp, i did this in one sitting and half asleep, english isnt my first language BLA BLA IM SORRY FOR MY POOR WRITING BUT HAVE THIS

basically you don’t know if you can trust venti or not, head says no, heart screams yes

Also, I was listening to stormterror’s lair ost while writing it, just because its fucking amazing, you might wanna listen to it too

I’m nervous to post this?/&:! This is the second fic i’ve ever finished in my whole life

i love venti and he’s hot in his god outfit i don’t make the rules

KAY ENJOY <3

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"Please, anybody... Just help me."

Saying you were exhausted would have been an understatement. After reuniting with your sibling, you had been frantically searching for clues about khaenri'ah and ways to Inazuma. With no luck, you couldn't find any traces of Dainsleif or of your twin. The ruins had been sealed and you had no idea what happened to the inverted statue or the corpse you had found there. Desperately, you clung into every little information you had, you would have turned every rock on this archon damned continent if you had to, which is what led you into those ruins near Guilli plains.

Walking along the destroyed buildings your eyes caught sight of a dandelion and you froze. You missed them so much, why couldn't they go back home with you? All you ever wanted was to be by their side why, why were they running away from you?

You remembered your travels, the moments you shared together, their protectiveness over you, the fondness in their eyes when you smiled at them. You remember the times you got hurt and healed one another with your now missing powers. You remember sleeping by their side and being grateful to the universe to let you keep your ray of sunshine everywhere with you. How ironic.

What had they meant 'once you reach the end of your journey' ? What does that even mean? Stupid twin, if they knew you were here the whole time, why hadn't they come to you? Why were they always leaving just when they were within your grasp? Why? Did they know how much you missed them and how much your heart broke when you finally saw them? Did they?

You only realized you were crying when a small gust of wind had your wet cheek react to the cold, breaking your train of thought. Wind.

The wind is everywhere, you think, free as a bird, always accompanying every citizen of this world, never truly alone. With this in mind, you resumed your exploring, slower this time.

A sigh escaped your mouth. You didn't want to admit it, but the wind did comfort you a little. Almost as if he was here. God of freedom and of the breeze, he was more a singer than a protector and you couldn't bear to think about him. Was it true? What Dain said... Did he destroy this nation? Was he the cause of the scenery that still haunted your nightmares up until 500 years later? Your brain simply couldn't accept that Venti, your Venti, you catch yourself thinking, could have made such an act of wrath. He was the epitome of freedom, why would he take the very thing he based all of his existence on from mere mortals? Barbatos simply couldn't be afraid of being overpowered, he didn't even care about power. All he wanted was freedom and happiness for his people. Surley this couldn't be right?

But then again, who were you to deny the wipe out of an entire nation? The gods did it. They were afraid that Celestia would be overthrown by the pride of humankind, the destruction of khaenri'ah by divine beings was a fact. There was no misunderstanding about this. That was the one thing you were sure of. So why did you feel like crying even more now?

The mere thought of a gentle soul such as Venti committing innocent people to an eternity of suffering didn't sit right with you. Even when his dearest friend Dvalin had turned against him, he didn't try to stop him, didn't even ask the dragon to save him. He healed and helped him, gave him a choice.

'What is freedom if demanded of you by a god?' was the same person that asked this question the same one who committed mass murder? Genocide?

Did the little wine-lover bard you had grown fond of destroy all hopes and light your kin had?

You remember that night when he freed Stanley from his burden, freed his and his friends' spirits. You had marveled at his action, in that instant he was a god, and he definitely hadn't struck you as a murderer. You remember that look of silent pain and grief in his eyes when he sang the tales of the nameless bard he had taken the appearance of. You knew he trusted you enough to share his story, something so personal, you could almost feel the war that took down the tyrant of Mond. Oh how much you cherished that evening, treating him to some well deserved dandelion wine afterwards, his favorite, and asking him to sing you more about the time where was nothing but the spirit of a breeze.

Your heart broke a little, remembering his rosy cheeks and drunk smile, you wish you could talk to him, ask him what happened. What did he do, was he really as dangerous as you had been told? If so, then why did you feel so good around him? Why did you feel like you could give hi-

You stopped walking upon seeing a ruin guard up ahead in the distance. You're so stupid, you think. Feeling this way is not gonna get you anywhere, especially with how the bard had been missing for a few weeks now. Ever since you had last seen your sibling.

Where was he, where was he wandering off to? You walk towards the disabled ruin guard, not really paying any mind to it, still thinking about the god you longed to meet with. If you could see him, what would you even say? Would he even answer your questions? Why did your stomach feel so light and funny when you thought about seeing him, why aren't you angrier?

You're almost at the killing machine's level now, so lost in your thought you don't notice the five other similar robots hidden behind a wall next to it. You notice them only when it's too late and you've already turned them on while thinking about examining them and collecting their serial numbers. When you hear the familiar tick of the mechanism turning on, you internally panic and think about running away only to calm down moments later and think to yourself that you can simply beat it and take what you came here for. Even if you are emotionally and physically tired, you can manage, you think.

That was before hearing five other consecutive ticks right after it, and all around you.

Turning around, your gaze falls upon the small army of field tillers. Fuck.

Paimon wasn't with you today, you had asked for some time alone which she hesitantly accepted, so you couldn't ask her to go fetch help. You would have been worried if you had all your capacities but with the state you were in, you were wondering how you were going to survive this fight. You were alone, none of your companions with you, and deeply weakened by the busy day you had and the few hours of sleep you had managed to steal away from the night. Was it today you would meet your doom, with all your questions and uncertainties unanswered?

You tried your best to fight with the strength you had left, but quickly grew desperate after what felt like hours of efforts to swing your blade and being able to only take one monster down out of the six. It didn't help that you got injured along the way, their blows becoming harder and harder to dodge. After being thrown on the grown for the third time, you understood you had at least two broken ribs and that your shaking legs would soon fail you as well.

Fear crept upon you, you would die here today, alone. Alone. You couldn't talk to your sibling after all, couldn't understand. You didn't even get to talk to him one last time. Him... You would die without the knowledge of the truth about your bard. You would die alone. You didn't want that, you couldn't look death straight in the eye.

"Please, anybody... Just help me."

In Mondstadt, there was a musician, a weird singer everyone had heard about at least once. He lived off of his songs and was mostly known for having a great story-telling and being an alcoholic.

The number of people who knew the true nature of his identity were few and he was perfectly content with that. He didn't wish to be a god anymore, his gnosis had been taken away anyway and it's not like he had any power over the city of wind nowadays. Even if his people still worshipped him as Barbatos, it didn't sit right with him to be called a god anymore. It actually never did, he thinks to himself with a smile, he never really took any responsibilities that came with the divine title which is why he was so weak today. But it didn't matter to him, his smile turns into a soft giggle.

Sitting on a mill that was once born from his steps he looks fondly over the city he founded. Even if they were godless, the citizens were still thriving and free. He cared oh so very deeply about the place even if he rarely, if not never, showed the affection within his heart. He remembers the day he grew strong enough to dispel the storms over his actual Mondstadt, and made the weather gentle enough so that there was no need for fireplaces. Nowadays, he loves watching birds nest into the chimney tops and seeing them found their own home. It gave him a sense of belonging like no other, not above his people, but walking among them and watching them nest into this cocoon he created. He was proud of what happened to his land and would do it all over again if he had to.

Especially since it led to him meeting you. This thought doesn't catch him off guard, you often roamed around in his mind after all, and it's not like he didn't write at least three songs about you and your feat, your smile, your courage...

Ah there he goes again, rambling about you in a whisper. He turns around to the statue of him his people erected in his honor, chuckling at how they never made the connection with his signature braids. His, but not really his, since he had stolen this form from someone who was much more deserving of this power than him. Seeing his friend being honored with the statues of the seven around the land made him happy, he hoped that it was a good enough thank you gift in return for everything that the bard whom he couldn't even remember the name of anymore did for him.

Upon gazing at the statue, he remembered telling you of his long gone friend. It was the first time he had talked about him to someone else, he didn't even mention it to Venessa, she who made him believe in himself again. He could ask himself why, but he simply knew that you had something different, more than meets the eye. Perhaps it was because you weren't from Teyvat, or perhaps it was just you being as simple as your natural self but he was simply and utterly captivated by your being. You inspired him to no end, at first he thought it was because he had never met someone like you and he loved new things! But as time grew and he got to know you, he understood quickly the meaning and depth of his passions. He thought of it with a light chuckle, content with your presence alone. He really did need and want you around.

So why did he purposely avoid you like the plague?

The wind had brought to his ears that you had met with Dainsleif.

And your twin.

His first reaction was to search for you, talk to you, he wanted to be here to know what happened! You had searched so long, he couldn't contain himself, still listening to what the wind told him, he started running with excitement but... But wait, Dainsleif was... He told you what?

Oh.

So you heard about Khaenri'ah. He had stopped dead in his tracks and turned back, only sending a warm current of wind your way, hugging you from afar.

He wasn't ready to talk about this yet, not ready to face you and absolutely not ready to answer your questions. He was a coward, he thought, running away like that but what else could he do, really. It was only natural for him to be as uncatchable as air.

A sorry excuse to avoid the fact that even if his past had marvelous story like the one of the nameless bard, it also had its share of darkness, something he wasn't ready to dive back into. Especially not now when your arrival has been shaking this world up like it hasn't been since at least 500 years.

But oh, how he longed to see your face or to hear your voice. So he asked a breeze to report to him what you were up to, and where you were. Just in case! he tells himself, what if you needed help ehe? But he knows you're competent and you won't need the help of a weakling coward like him anytime soon. Or so he thought.

Because when the breeze only gives him a few words back, his blood runs cold.

"Please, anybody... Just help me."

As you murmured these words in your desperate state, not really for anyone but yourself as a last resort, a prayer of some sort, you tried to stand by leaning yourself on your sword and failing miserably. You didn't dare look up as you heard the loud footsteps of the metal giants coming your way. It was over, and you barely managed to accept it.

As you rested your forehead against the cold handle of your sword, you closed your eyes, tears starting to make their ways out of your closed eyelids. All you could feel was remorse.

A soft breeze moved your hair slightly and your chest felt like a black hole had taken place where your heart used to be, regretting to not have been able to meet him under the tree at Windrise one last time.

The breeze quickly grew stronger, until it felt unnatural and you looked up from the ground, only to close your eyes again immediately when you realized the wind was too powerful for you to keep them open. If you had struggled to see though, you would have been blinded by the white light that soon illuminated the whole ruins. You didn't have enough time to register the situation when you felt a hand being laid atop your shoulder, snaking around your collarbones and pulling you back into... nothing? Another arm circled your weak form and a voice you immediately recognized said

"I've dealt with things worse than you, now crumble."

You realized that if you couldn't feel a chest behind you while still being embraced by his arms, it was because he was floating above you, and not standing behind you. A look in his direction confirmed your suspicions but what stunned you wasn't the fact that he was flying, but the attire he wore. Barely covering his body, a white set made of materials that seemed like clouds and liquid gold contrasted perfectly with his regular green clothes. His hair was glowing green and his eyes that were focused on the ruin guards up ahead had a marvelous shine that you had never seen before. He had that same aura he did the night he freed Stanley, but there was also something different about the way his hands gripped you a little too tightly or the way his voice sounded.

"Venti.." You muttered his name, relief and affection flooding you all at once, in his presence you felt as if nothing bad could happen to you. How foolish could you be, just a few hours ago you were speculating wether or not he had wiped out an entire civilisation and now here you were, being saved by him and feeling safer than you had in months.

"Close your eyes, I don't want give you a headache" he said, slowly floating legs first towards the ground. His unusually serious voice surprised you (and him) but you did as he told you. Letting go of your sword and leaning back into him, you let him deal with the monsters ahead of you.

"It's okay, it's over now" he kneeled to be at your level, his arms still wrapped around you, and you didn't have the energy to fight your urge of nuzzling into him. "I'll always be here for you, wherever there is wind, remember I'm here too. You only need to ask."

Being protected by a god really didn't feel that bad. Especially when you were in love with said god.

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Thank you so much for reading whatever this is until the end :’)

Don’t hesitate to comment or reblog, tysm <3

Ps: venti loves u and so do i do pls take care of urself mwah

#genshin impact x reader #genshin impact headcanons #genshin impact #genshin impact angst #genshin impact scenario #venti x reader #venti x traveler #venti x lumine #venti x aether #el writes♡

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king-star · 3 years

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When the Party’s Over

Warning: Homophobia, transphobia, death, bile, guts, broken limb, crying, pet neglection, driving while slightly tipsy, fire (lmk if i need to add more. This is all around pretty dark and sad, proceed with caution)

Match: Yelena Belova x enby!Reader; Wanda Maximoff x reader

Genre: Angst, Angst, and more Angst

A/N: This is the first chapter in a series. Idk how long it’ll be. the plan is bi weekly updates. im reallyyyyy proud of this one so let’s hope it doesn’t flop. ENJOY!

Word Count: ~3,000

Summary: You have a horrible nightmare, leaving you with anxiety for Yelena. Yelena assures you that everything is fine and leaves on a mission.

Your tongue rubs the roof of your mouth in an attempt to rid itself of the sickly sweet drink you’d been sipping. A hundred intoxicated humans swirl around you. Fabric, skin, and feathers blend together, the orchestra the only thing holding off the headache behind your eyes.

You didn’t want to be here. Sure ballroom charity balls could be fun. If you had your best friends there, you could chat only with them, and dance to your heart's content. Unfortunately for you, everyone you could stand to be around was busy. Leaving you human-shieldless from your mothers many socialite friends.

The “oh my goodness Y/N I haven’t seen you since you were in highschool. How are you?” got old quick. Retelling your life story over and over was a pain especially with your mother gripping your hand making sure you didn’t slip up. Share any information that didn’t quite fit the Y/L/N dynasty image. Mostly she didn’t want you sharing about the love of your life, your girlfriend, your Yelena.

When the two of you first got together you waited nearly 5 months before telling your mother. The first time you dated a girl she had hated it. She tried to act like she was supportive, claiming “I will always love you no matter what.” But in the end she always shielded this fact from the public eye. She was supportive of all the LGBT+ movements from a political standpoint. Never her own child.

You never told Yelena about this. You claimed the reason you didn’t want to share her with your mother was because you wanted your relationship to not have paparazzi after you two. She bought it for a while but you could only keep the love of your life away from the woman who gave you life for so long. It didn’t take a master spy to understand the emotions behind the look your mother gave you when you brought Yelena to dinner. Yelena never brought it up but it was an unspoken understanding. Your mother didn’t accept you no matter how hard she tried to fake it.

Now you just wanted the event to be over so you could go home to Yelena. You flipped your wrist, checking the ridiculously expensive watch you had on.

11:31

She was definitely asleep by now. Yelena never stayed up past 10:30. Frowning, you set down your glass and turned to your mother, waiting for her conversation to end. When she finally stopped speaking she turned to you and cocked an eyebrow,

“Y/N. Are you leaving? so soon?” she pouted but enough years in her home taught you her looks. This was faked sadness.

“Unfortunately yes mother. Lena is probably asleep by now and I have work early. She probably forgot to feed our dog,” you enunciated the words that might clue in your mothers friend on how you and this woman were related. A last “fuck you mother” before you left. She smiled warningly and nodded.

“Well… you must get home to your friend. I will see you soon daughter,” she kissed your hand and you stood there frozen. Of course, she would invalidate your gender and your relationship in one comment. Your nostrils flared and you turned quickly, letting your hand smack your unfinished drink into her lap and treading off quickly.

“Fuck you mother. How someone could be so hateful to their own child I will never understand,” you muttered to yourself. You handed your ticket to the valet and stood with your arms crossed, waiting. You made sure to tip the valet an absurd amount, and drove off quickly. The only thing that would keep you from doing something stupid in retaliation was Yelena’s arms around you.

Nearly thirty minutes later you pulled the car into the garage. It shouldn’t have taken you that long to get home but you couldn’t help but drive with the top down for a bit. Anger and maybe a bit of fear had bubbles underneath your skin and you didn’t want to bother Yelena. You stepped out of the car and held your head in your hands. You hadn’t drank that much, but a headache would be inevitable.

Fanny met you at the door. She was obviously excited, tail wagging as she raced back to her food bowl

“ok ok girl. I’ve got you,” you rubbed her head and dumped a scoop of food into her bowl. Loosening your tie you dragged yourself to the bedroom. You smiled as the light poured in and illuminated the silhouette of a sleeping Yelena.

“Deep asleep. I’ll join you in a second,” you pulled the rest of your suit off. Picking up a discarded shirt you put it on, and leaned your head against the mirror.

“That was misery. And mother’s comment. I shouldn’t care about what that bitch thinks or says. But I can't help it,” you let out a sigh and picked up your toothbrush. Maybe someday she will accept you. But at that point would she ever be able to make up for how she treated you?

Ready for bed you slid in beside Yelena, careful not to wake her. Fanny, finished with her food, jumped into bed with you and snuggled up with a lick to your face. You smiled and kissed her head then kissed Yelena.

“night my love. See you in the morning,” your heavy lids drooped and you relaxed, setting a hand on Yelena and falling into dreamland.

Your thighs hurt. Fire and smoke burn your throat and eyes. You search for something. What exactly you aren’t sure. Tears stream down your face as anxiety floods your chest. If you don’t find the thing soon your world will be crushed.

A broken door, barely on its hinges, is at your right and you know that’s it. A hard turn and you smack your arm into the frame. You grasp at your wrist as more tears prick your eyes.

“Fuck!” A familiar level of pain flares and you know it’s broken. Your eyes dart around the room, still looking for that unknown thing. A pile of smoking wood sits in front of you and your feet carry you to it. This was it.

You try hard to pull through the heavy, hot wood with your one arm. A cry comes from below, an anxiety flaring familiar cry. You pull harder and uncover and dirty and bloody Yelena.

“LENA!” you shout and help her out. Her hands held her stomach. She smiles sickly and then curls in pain.

“Y/N. You found me. I hoped you would. Quick kiss me. I don’t have long,” Your eyes widen and you move her hands. The sight of her stomach makes you sick. Turning to the side you retch and vile spills from your mouth. You wipe your mouth and shake your head, tears fall hard now.

“Lena no no. You’re fine. We can fix you. Please,” you slide your arm under her and try to pick her up but she screams and goes limp in your arms.

“FUCK Y/N! stop. There's no hope. Please just kiss me. I don’t want to die without that.” you shake your head more and set her down. You refused to accept her death.

“No Yelena you are not going to die here. You can’t die. You are too well trained. a-and… I can't live without you. it’ll be fine,” She tries to raise her head but then it falls and she spasms. Your eyes widen and you do your best to hold her still but your broken wrist shoots in pain.

“No no no NO!” you kiss her over and over. Fear pulses through you and when she relaxes completely you sob. Your head aches from the pressure of your sobs and your broken wrist protests. Maybe hours pass and you sit there with her dead body pressed to your chest, her blood and guts smearing all over you.

Then guilt overtakes the sadness. She asked you for one thing. One single kiss before she died and you didn’t fulfill that. You couldn’t give her everything she deserved in life or even in her final moments.

You wake up shaking and screaming. Yelena is awake next to you, crying and shaking your shoulder violently.

“Please Y/N,” she sobs, snot and tears mix and fall forgotten. You sit up barely able to hold yourself up. She is alive.

“Fuck Yelena what’s wrong?” Your dream haunts you. You search her stomach and her whole body for major wounds. She is obviously unsure what you are doing and grabs your face forcing you to look at her.

“Y-you were shaking and screaming and crying and I didn’t know what was wrong. If you were having a seizure or what.” You shake your head and take deep breaths.

“No, I'm good. Not seizure. R-Really…” your words falter and you stare off, caught up in the memory of the dream. Yelena snaps in front of you and hugs your arm. “Ah sorry. Bad dream. really, really bad dream.” you stare at her head unsure if this was the dream or if Yelena really was alive.

“D-do you want to tell me about it?” Her arms slide under yours and she holds you from the side. You shake your head and lay it on her shoulder. “Ok but if you do tell me. I’ll hold you until you fall asleep again.”

The thought of being asleep again makes you tense up. Yelena feels it and rubs your side softly. She kisses you in every way she knows you like and pets your head.

“I’m not going to sleep. I can’t live through that again. It made me think I was going to be alone. Please don’t leave me Lena. please. I don’t wanna die alone.” She frowns and hugs you tight.

“I’m never going to leave you. I’m here baby. I’m here.” She kisses your jaw softly and you nod. Relaxing again, you wrap your arms around her waist and kiss her shoulders.

“Y-you died. There was a fire and I broke my wrist and it was smokey and you got impaled and you died. You asked me to kiss you and I couldn’t accept the fact you were dying so I didn’t kiss you. I couldn’t give you what you deserve.” She frowns and kisses you.

“No Y/N. Don’t you dare. It was just a nightmare, that’s all. I’m NEVER leaving you. ok?” She holds your face and kisses you softly. The kiss lasts a while and you melt into your touch. Fears still paralyse you every couple hours but she holds you until the sun comes up. She knows exactly what you love and how to make you feel safe. She really wasn’t ever going to leave.

Weeks pass. You are sure you have gotten past the nightmare. You go to work everyday and Yelena stays home going through paperwork. When you come home the two of you snuggle and bliss fills you. Your mother doesn’t ask you to come to any more charity events and you think maybe, just maybe things are good.

Then Yelena gets called on the mission. When she tells you she will be gone for a week your mind reels. You can barely see straight as the dream vividly flashes through your brain. Yelena gets worried, grabbing your hand and you back away searching her body for any sign of blood.

“No. Lena please. What if you get hurt? I-I can’t. You promised you’d never leave.” Her eyes look at you apologetically.

“Don’t worry. I’m a professional. It’s just a small info gathering job. Absolutely no danger,” she smiles at you and sets a hand on your shoulder. You back away from her hand and lean your head back to force the tears back.

“Yelena… ok. Please. Don’t get hurt,” She nods and kisses your cheek grabbing her bag.

You spend the entire week at home. Anxiety grips you so hard that you can’t stand to go to work. A fever strikes and you throw up every evening at almost exactly 10:30. Work tells you to stay at home and probably go to the doctor. Honestly you’d rather go to work so you have less time to think about her.

Most of Yelena's missions don’t allow for her to contact you and the stress of it all has your brain thinking of her the entire time she’s gone. By the time Yelena is on her way back you have dropped 12 pounds. You hadn’t eaten, only bothering to get up to feed Fanny. A cold sweat coats your skin and you hold your arms to you. Blankets were too hot, but it was too cold without them.

The alarm on your phone signalling it’s time to feed Fanny goes off. You throw the blankets off and wipe dried tears. The tv screen flashes a “keep watching screen.” You aren’t really sure when it came up but your mind hadn’t registered the tv in a couple days.

When the door clicks unlocked you scream. Silence had filled the apartment for so long and the sound was louder than anything you’d ever heard. Fanny starts barking, running to the door, then coming back and sitting at your feet.

You fall to the ground clasping the food scoop. Fanny licks your face as tears fall. Every fear that had plagued you came to the forefront of your mind. What if it wasn’t Yelena? What if it was Hill telling you to come in? No, they would call you for that. But if Yelena was dead…

Arms wrap around and pick you up, setting you on the couch. You whip your head back and forth trying to catch a glance of who it is. In the back of your mind you know it's her, but for some reason you’d been convinced over the past week that she’s dead.

A warm towel wipes away dried tears and snot, and a soft hand holds yours. Tears blur your vision but you steady your breaths. The anxiety in your chest dissipates. You lean your head back forcing the tears in and look back to catch a look at the woman you love. But, instead of long blonde hair and soft round face, you see long red hair, falling in waves.

“Lena? Did you have to dye your hair for the mission?” She frowns and shakes her head, setting down the towel.

“Fuck Y/N. I know you can’t remember but I hate having to keep telling you this,” The voice is not Yelena’s. It’s your friends. Wanda’s. Your eyes look her all over and you tense up confused.

“Tell me what Wanda? What’s wrong with Lena?” She grabs both your hands and looks at you with the softest expression she can muster.

“The fire Y/N. Do you remember? The fire where Lena…. She bled out,” The anxiety of the dream. No memory. The smoke, your raw throat, and the hours of sobbing.

You shake your head and quick breaths fill your lungs. Wanda tries to get you to calm down. Your vision spots while your brain searches for oxygen your hyperventilating can’t provide.

“Y/N please calm down. Please. FUCK! I promised to never use it without permission but between the two of you…” Red magic flows from her hands and wraps around your head. Your breathing slows down and your vision comes back. Wanda cradles your head and hums.

You reach up and see the tear streaks on her face. Her eyes look bloodshot and dark circles are prominent under her eyes. You pout and try to hug her back. All the fears that had consumed you for weeks were now gone. Even if it was only by Wanda’s magic. You curled into her side and fell asleep. Finally able to find some peace.

It was the night of the charity gala. You drove home but had taken the long way around to cool off from your mothers subtle aggression. Plans on how to ignore her future advances build in your mind as you pull into the parking garage. You stepped out of the car and held your head in your hands. You hadn’t drank that much, but a headache would be inevitable.

Sirens sound from the road in front of your complex and you growl. The loud noise and lights make your head pound. You shake your keys and walk towards the stairwell. Coughing into your arm and you open the door to your floor. You throw your hand back with a scream at the hot door handle.

“the fuck…? NO!” forgetting your pain you throw open the door and run into the building. Smoke flows from under doors and fire licks at the walls. The sound of the siren gets louder from some open window. You run through the halls trying your best to not breathe in smoke. Yelena would be asleep. She wouldn’t know what’s happening.

Your apartment door is on the right and you stand back and kick the handle. Your foot hurts as it contacts the rough wooden door but it cracks. You kick again and the door falls in. Running through the door you smack your arm into the frame and cry out in pain.

Fanny barks from one of the rooms and you follow the noise letting her run free into the hallway. You hope dearly that the dog finds her way out.

The entirety of your home is consumed in flames. Beams that held up the apartment above you are on the floor. The poor old couple who was always so nice. Hopefully they had gotten out before it collapsed. Running to your bedroom you try to open the door. It gives quickly but before you can get to Yelena a strong arm grabs at your back.

“What the? HEY!” you squirm trying to slip out of the grip. You have no luck and result to punching. Nothing makes the arms let you go as they pull you from the building. Along the way down you consider it may be a firefighter saving your life.

“Please. My girlfriend, she’s still in there. Please, she was asleep. Save her. I can get out,” you plead with your “saviour”. The person doesn’t acknowledge any words or attempts of movement. They just carry you out of the building back into the parking garage. At some point you began crying, fearing for your girlfriends and your neighbours lives.

You are carried to a car and roughly thrown in. Your broken wrist, now remembered, aches and you curl into a ball. The driver doesn’t speak to you and the person who carried you doesn’t get into the car with you. You didn’t register the person in the back seat with you until they cough. Or rather She coughs.

“Oh Y/N I’m glad we got you out ok. I was so scared we wouldn’t be able to get you out before the fire got you too,” Your eyes widen at the familiar voice and you sit up looking into her eyes. The pieces fall into place in your mind. No you’d never thought she’d be this cruel. Yet here you were, Yelena and Fanny. They were in there.

“You didn’t. no no you didn’t. You are cruel and hateful but not murderous,” you pull away as a hand strokes your cheek. Hate flashes behind your eyes.

“Oh honey. You will forgive me when you realise it was for the sake of the family. Like they always say; ‘Mother knows best.’”

(So it has been decided this is going to be a series. Follow and shoot me an ask if you wanted to be added to the tag list for updates)

DO NOT repost my work. Reblogs and Likes are appreciated. If you enjoy my work leave a comment!

#yelena belova x reader #yelena belova x y/n #yelena belova fanfic #yelena belova #yelena belova angst #marvel fanfic #mcu #yelena belova x you #avengers x reader #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x y/n #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff angst #wanda maximoff fanfic #wanda maximoff

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set-phasers-to-whump · 3 years

Text

hiding

prompt: hidden

whumpee: shawn spencer

fandom: psych

hi! sorry for being absent for 2 days and then coming back with a fic that i think might suck? idk. i have been looking at it for too long i think... maybe you will like it? idk. i hope so tho :)

Shawn has chased more than one old man down the streets of Santa Barbara. Today’s pursuit is no different to the others - or at least, it isn’t until he finally catches up with the old dude in question (who, just for the record, is the fastest seventy year old Shawn has ever encountered).

They’re in an alley, and the other end is blocked off by several feet of chain link fence. This old guy may be speedy, but he’s evidently not much of a climber. Which is good.

“Took you long enough to catch up with me,” he says, his creaky-sounding old-man voice taunting and a little demeaning.

But his statement is fair. As is evidenced by the fact that Shawn is panting hard, bent slightly at the waist with his hands on his knees as he catches his breath.

“But I did catch you,” Shawn says after a second, straightening back up. “And now I’m going to have to call the police.”

“I don’t think so.”

Shawn is about to say something dazzlingly witty in response, but all of a sudden there’s a glint of silver and then…

Then he’s just been stabbed by someone who probably eats his dinner at 4:30.

It takes him by such surprise that he doesn’t even make a noise.

And then it hurts. Hot and blinding and sharp and intense pain radiates outward from his stomach and the knife is pulled out and it hurts even more and he feels his body collapse but doesn’t register hitting the ground. There are stars in his vision and everything is blurry and the world sounds like he’s underwater and it hurts and hurts and hurts and he looks upwards as the old man casually wipes Shawn’s blood from the knife with the sleeve of his dark jacket. He idly passes the knife from hand to hand and Shawn watches him and he really wants to just get up and punch him and he staggers to his feet amidst a haze of bright red pain and then there’s a familiar voice from behind him saying, “drop your weapon,” and Lassiter has found them, somehow. He’s never been more grateful to hear the man’s voice in his life.

“How did you find me?” he asks, before he can stop himself. He knows what he should probably be saying is, hey, I just got stabbed and maybe we should be doing something about that, but then Lassie’s explaining how he’d tracked Shawn down and he’s asking what exactly Shawn had been thinking going after a suspect alone, and then Shawn just kind of…doesn’t bring it up.

It’s not like he doesn’t try to. But Lassie is more interested in lecturing him about proper police procedure (which Shawn is familiar with - he simply chooses to disregard it).

“Lassie, um, I -” I got stabbed and it hurts really bad and could we maybe go to the hospital, please?

“I don’t wanna hear it, Spencer.”

“But -”

“If you don’t shut up right now, I swear I’ll pull over and make you walk. That man had a knife, and you chased after him because, what? You couldn’t…”

Lassie keeps lecturing him about why this was such a stupid idea (which, Shawn admits, it was). Shawn sighs to himself as the lecture goes on and on, which is a bad move, because it jostles his stab wound, and it takes all of his willpower to not just scream at the flare of white hot pain. He closes his eyes and tries to breathe normally but everything hurts and the whole front of his shirt is wet and sticking to his skin and he wonders vaguely whether he’s bleeding on Lassie’s seat, and hopes fervently that he’s not, because Lassiter will never forgive him if he ruins his upholstery.

After what feels like an eternity of driving, they arrive back at the police station. Shawn feels tired, and lightheaded, and he knows that’s bad. And they’re here now, so Lassie can’t force him to get out of the car and walk, so he decides to try and bring it up again.

“I think I’ve -” I think I’ve been stabbed, well, I know I’ve been stabbed, and I don’t wanna die but I’m pretty sure I’ve lost a lot of blood and it might be nice to do something about that.

But Lassie is already out of the car, opening the backseat and leading their cuffed suspect inside the building. Halfway up the steps, he turns around. Shawn is still in the car, and Lassie makes a gesture for him to hurry it up and follow them.

Shawn steels himself for the pain, then extricates himself from the passenger seat. It’s a painful ordeal, but thankfully, no one is there to hear his very pathetic whimpers. Once he’s out of the car, Shawn briefly turns around to check on his seat. Fortunately, it’s free of blood. He looks down at himself and sees that his clothes have not fared quite as well.

His black shirt looks wet, but the blood isn’t visible, thanks to the shirt’s dark color. The blood does reach down to his jeans, though, turning the tops of the legs rusty red. The inside of his jacket is damp, but the blood hasn’t soaked through the material, so the exterior looks clean. Shawn tugs his shirt and jacket down to hide the bloodstains on his jeans, then begins his trek inside.

The walk into the station is one of the most painful things Shawn has ever experienced in his life. The stairs are absolute hell on his wound, and he can feel more and more blood soaking through his shirt with every step he takes. He’s slowly but surely getting dizzy, and it’s getting harder and harder to focus, and he really needs to tell someone about this but he kind of doesn’t want to, now, for reasons he can’t quite fathom, and mostly he just wants to sleep. It hurts.

Finally, he makes it inside the station. There’s an empty chair pulled up next to Lassiter’s currently-empty desk, and Shawn makes a very slow beeline for it.

Sitting down is painful, but once he’s sitting, it’s infinitely more comfortable than standing or walking, and the pain lessens, just a bit. Shawn takes another look down at himself and sees, much to his alarm, drops of blood on the floor below him. The sight makes him feel even dizzier, and for a second he thinks he might pass out, and then he recalls what you’re supposed to do if you get stabbed (other than, you know, call an ambulance).

Pressure. He is supposed to apply pressure to the wound. It’s going to hurt, surely, but what’s a little more pain?

Again, Shawn has to fight to keep himself from screaming. Despite the intense pain, he keeps pressing his hands into his stomach, feeling the warm and wet and sticky fabric of his shirt. It’s the most unpleasant sensation in the world. His own blood soaking through his clothes and into his hands. He feels sick. Dizzy. Lightheaded. Confused. Afraid.

He needs to tell somebody about this before he actually passes out.

“Spencer? What’s wrong with you?”

Shawn startles at Lassiter’s voice. He sounds…oddly concerned. Hesitantly, Shawn turns his head in Lassie’s direction. Tell him, his brain suggests.

He opens his mouth to say something, but is interrupted (again).

“Are you…crying?”

Is he? Shawn raises a hand to his face and scrubs it under his eyes.

“Is that blood?” Lassiter is all seriousness now, and Shawn looks down at his fingers and remembers what they’d been doing before he’d used them to wipe his face. They’re bright red and now that he sees the blood, he can feel it on his face, drying beneath his eyes.

“What happened?”

“I got stabbed,” Shawn admits, finally. It’s such a relief to finally say the words, and he feels some of the tension leave his body.

Oh. Maybe too much tension. He’s falling.

Shawn’s body makes impact with the floor, and he can’t stop himself from crying out this time. For a second, everything is engulfed by a wave of pain that very nearly causes him to black out.

When the pain clears up somewhat, Shawn’s vision returns, and Lassie is above him, shouting something at someone and Shawn can’t focus hard enough to determine what he’s saying or who he’s saying it to. His voice is loud and commanding but there’s a look of something akin to fear on his face and Shawn wonders if he is going to die.

“Am I…” he starts, but halfway through the sentence he forgets what he’s going to say.

“You’re going to be fine,” Lassiter says, and his voice sounds certain but that look is still on his face and it scares Shawn and he doesn’t want to die, not now, not like this…

Lassie must sense him spiraling, because suddenly he’s talking again. Shawn focuses on him as best as he can, catching bits and pieces of the things he’s saying. “I can’t believe you got stabbed and didn’t say a word about it…running after a known suspect…going to punish him to the full extent of the law…”

Lassie’s talking eventually fades away, and darkness starts creeping into the edges of his vision, and somewhere in the back of his mind Shawn thinks, that’s not good, and then the darkness sweeps over him and the pain goes away and he finally falls asleep.

He wakes up and people are moving all around him, and he’s moving too, and he feels weird and he’s not exactly hurting but there’s some sort of strange sensation blanketing him and making it very hard to focus. He tries asking one of the people a question but his voice sounds muffled and he doesn’t know what he’s saying and then everything goes away again.

The next time he wakes up, he is much more aware. He’s in a hospital, and there’s a teenage girl in the bed to his right and a middle-aged man in the bed to his left. There are various machines around him that he doesn’t care to inspect, and there are four chairs positioned around the bed. All of them are empty.

He wonders where his visitors have gone. He wants to see Gus. And Jules. Maybe even his dad. He’d like to see Lassie, because he’s pretty sure the head detective had saved his life, but he doubts he’ll be here. He probably has much more important things to attend to.

So it’s a surprise when, a few long minutes later, Lassie steps into the room. He’s distracted, phone to his ear, steaming cup in his hand, and there’s a spot of blood on his jacket and a few more on his shirt and Shawn realizes it’s his blood - who else’s can it be - and if that’s true then either he’s recovered from surgery remarkably quickly, or Lassie has been here for several hours and hasn’t left. Both seem improbable, and yet…

When he’s made it halfway across the room, Lassie finishes his call and tucks his phone back into his pocket. He looks up at Shawn for the first time, and the dark expression on his face clears away when Shawn looks right back at him.

“Hey, Lassie,” Shawn greets tiredly, waving carefully with the arm that doesn’t have an IV needle sticking into it. “How’s it going?”

Lassie looks briefly like he wants to strangle Shawn for asking such a stupid question, but then he sighs and sinks down into one of the chairs, apparently resigning himself to answer the question.

“It’s going fine,” he says. “I’m not the one who got stabbed and then failed to tell anyone about it.”

“I tried,” Shawn admits. “You interrupted me. And then you weren’t there and I just…didn’t want to tell anyone.”

A look of guilt crosses Lassiter’s face. “I should have listened to you,” he says, which is an admission Shawn never thought he’d hear. He’d love to focus on it a little more, maybe tease Lassie for caring or possibly even keep the conversation serious, but he’s tired. He feels his eyes start to drift closed and he yawns.

He’s about to ask Lassie if they can continue this conversation in a few hours when Lassie sighs and says, “just rest, Shawn. We can talk later, whenever you’re feeling up to it. I’ll be here.”

It’s the nicest thing Lassie has ever said to him. Shawn would like nothing more than to say something gently teasing about Lassie really caring about him after all, but he simply falls asleep instead.

thanks for reading this! sorry for any mistakes i am super tired lol. hope you enjoyed, love u <3

#summerofwhump #summerofwhump28 #psych #shawn spencer #hidden #hidden injury #stabbed #collapse #hospital #my writing #i say things #ugghhhhh tired gn!

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hoaxsen · 4 years

Text

| angst has been coming to me easy now and idk how to feel about that.

| tw; character death, in depth talk of death, mentions of blood and other gruesome parts, season three spoilers.

| word count; 1.8k.

It was all over, spreading like a plague inside the walls upon their arrival. The victory of Wall Maria, along with the near extinction of the Scouts. How many supplies were lost during it? How much destruction was there while it all went down? Does anyone have a true number on how many bodies were being carried back on those flatbed carts after that expedition?

They were mostly parts of bloodied and mangled things, some weren't even able to be called a body. More like a massive piles of mixed dirt, debris and whatever part of the human body there could be. One hundred and ninety nine people, turned into one enormous jigsaw puzzle that anyone has ever seen. How many carts were used for that, and which cart did this specific body rest upon?

This body held the features of bright blue eyes, that the captain of the Scouts could sometimes find himself staring into for hours on end. Unknowingly at that. Blonde hair just swept back and kept so neat with its undercut. Sometimes Levi wonders if it was soft to the touch, it doesn't look to be hard, or dirty. Just right, minus those brows. If anything there were times where Levi wanted to trim the blonde bricks of hair off Erwin's face himself.

Now, days like that will never come. For the sole purpose, of Erwin Smith being deceased. Giving his life up to his stupid cause and dream, this isn't what Levi meant by plundering your dream and lead those crying brats to hell. Was it selfish of him to think that Erwin might come back alive for him? It was, wasn't it? The man having to live through this shit as the leader, making gambles that no one knew how the hell they paid off. Let's not forget about the cadets and soldiers lost along the way in his gambles. A devil among men, though it was Levi wanting to be the one to raise hell right now. Bring a darker hell to the one on this very Earth for the fact that he chose to revive Armin instead of Humanity's Hope.

Cold, and hardened steel grey hues watched as his body was pulled away, riding alongside on his own horse with this cart. Levi felt only himself at fault, what if he did revive Erwin? Despite the small specks of rocks, falling out and shredded intestines, and lack of life in the blonde's eyes, how would he look taking on the power of the colossal titan? Would he have looked the same as the treacherous Bertholdt, or better? If anything, he'd be alive right now. . .fighting a war once more in this hell. Yes, it was selfish, but Levi Ackerman had his reasons to be selfish in a time like this. Bringing back Erwin instead of Armin wasn't just going to be for humanity, it was also going to be for his own desires. To stop toying with the feelings the ravenette has for the blonde, to stop the daily lies about his ' small crush ' being just a phase.

The captain never even got to make good on his promise before the commander passed. Wanting so hard and bad to end the Beast Titan, to make him feel the pain Erwin did before his final moments. Hopefully that chance comes back for him some other time. How badly Levi needs it, it'd only be fitting since Erwin gave up his dream for the wall retake to even have happened and succeed.

For all Levi could do now, was regret and hope that Erwin's funeral would bring him into a small state of piece. Since the ex-commander was already in a permanent state of his own, never to be disturbed. The Ackerman slowly starts to wonder to himself, which kind of suit would really bring out a dead man's eyes? For blue, it had to be a subtle white, right? An ashen grey? Whatever color it was going to be, Levi knew he'd detest it. Knowing it'll be the final suit he sees Erwin in.

Fast forward a bit to the lowering of the old Scouts' commander into the ground, Levi stayed behind a little ways after the ceremony. Standing before Erwin's grave, a short sigh leaving him as he placed a hand on Erwin's tombstone.

Erwin Smith

xxxx - xxxx

Humanity's Beacon of Hope.

The words Levi read over, and over, and over again. Humanity's Hope, snuffed out a little ways too soon. Levi just had to wake up and face the music, it was bound to happen one day or another. He just wishes that day came a little later than this. Brushing his hand over the words, better now to say this before he keeps it inside for too long. He already regrets not saying this to him when he was alive.

" How many of these have we attended for our fallen? Now look at you, dumbass. Right there with them, tell Petra I said hi when you see her. "

His last chance to say this all know, because whatever God out there knows that Levi wouldn't visit Erwin's grave again after this. For the small grudge he'd hold against himself for using the syringe on Armin.

" I followed you into the fire, made it out with a few scrapes. Though you were burned, still had the guts to carry on more bravely than me. . .even make a choice with that odd line. ' What if there is humanity outside the walls. ' Or some shit like that, and then I realized, and knew. . .that was how you were plundering your dreams and leading those crying brats to hell. "

Unbeknownst to the captain, he wasn't alone. Just standing from afar, was another grieving heart. Armin Artlet, another soul wanting to say an unspoken peace to their old commander. But ended up seeing Levi there before him.

" It's not fair you know, Erwin. Or that just might be me being selfish right now, yeah sounds like it. A biased opinion, since I fucking loved you and didn't have the guts to say it. Wanna know why? Cause I'm a coward. Since people I love keep leaving me in ways like this, death. Am I that detestable that death is the only way out? Gotta be, shitty way to go if you ask me, but probably your only way. Call it a curse, I guess. Sadly shit like this happens in the fucked world. I didn't even want to use it on Artlet, but you made your choice. So I had to make mine, fucking bastard. "

Now that was a surprise to the little eavesdropper in the back, covering his mouth with his hand to not make a sound. Azure eyes bugging out of his head as the captain droned on. Armin himself wasn't even sure why he was saved, wouldn't Erwin have been a better pick? The power of the titan wasted on him, that's how it sounded. On the bright side, the colossal titan was in their arsenal with Eren's titan. Just with the wrong user in Artlet's mind.

" It's not fair, you asshole. You get your peace, and leave me behind in this hell with a bunch of brats! Yes, they can pull their own weight. But you're not leading them anymore, instead it's gonna be someone else who can't live up to your name. All because I got emotional and saved that runt, when I knew, even with Hanji, that you were the better pick! A massive fuck up on my end, but then a small lived victory right? We have another titan ready to fight for us when needed. But I want you here! It's not fair, you trusted me to do the right thing with that weird liquid, and I don't know if I did! I promised myself that I'd follow you wherever, why did you have to go somewhere I can't go yet?! You and your stupid gambles, well make one with the devil down there and win, come back goddamn it! "

At this point, Levi was screaming to a grave on the verge of tears. From standing to dropping on his knees, the turned up dirt from a freshly dug hole in the ground was staining his pants. Giving him the feelings of touching the underground floors, though this time he didn't care. Fighting back an attack of tears, his hands digging into the soil and gripping it. Dirt being trapped in his fingernails, a fierce look on his face with a few stray falling tears from his eyes.

" I promise you, I'll make that sonva bitch pay. Along with aiding in to see that your final goal, your final dream is fulfilled. Even if I have to die to make that happen. "

It was a footstep, and the use of sharp senses that brought Levi out of his moment. Spinning around quick as could be, just to be met with a crying, tear stained face of one of his cadets. This was Levi's moment of vulnerability, being seen by Armin as if privacy wasn't a thing. Though now, the man couldn't hold it against the boy, dusting off himself to be free of the dirt and grime. Levi sent Armin a small glare, no words have been spoken yet, and not one really knew what to say.

" Captain . . . I'm sorry, but you should have us--. "

" Can it brat, I dunno how much you heard, and I hate repeating myself. But I'll make an exception, Erwin made his choice. I acted on it, now you might have to step up to bat. "

Levi's words drew a small gasp from Armin, making him want to roll his eyes.

" No one can live up to be Erwin, but I trust that you know what you're doing. Don't make me regret saving you now. "

" Y-Yes sir! But can I ask a question? "

That made a brow raise on Levi's face, a sign for Armin to carry on with what he was saying. The boy had to take a deep breath to even get the first word out. It almost made Levi scoff at a time like this.

" Y-You l-love Commander Erwin, sir? Is-Is that true? "

The stuttering fool really had the balls to ask. The captain almost looked impressed, but at the same time angered somewhat.

" Yeah, I loved him, Artlet. A main factor playing on in why I wanted to use the syringe on him. But something happened during it, like I said. Don't make me regret it. "

All he got was a frantic nod from the other blonde, even a salute for some reason. Levi responded with his own nod back, figuring now that his time alone with Erwin was up. Looking behind him at that grave, he sighed, his eyes narrowing somewhat.

' Don't worry, Erwin. You won't be along for long, I said I'd follow you right? Into that same fire I'll soon be going. '

He whispered out, making his way to leave now. Going as far as to pat a startled Armin on the shoulder. His own line echoing inside his head to help cope with this, just tweaked a bit this time.

' Plunder all your dreams, and lead those crying brats to victory. In his name. '

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heronpoxed · 4 years

Text

SONS OF ANARCHY SPOILERS

Idk man, the show’s been over for 6 years but still BEWARE

So I’ve been thinking a lot about Jax and Tara and about how fabulous Tara is and what an ass Jax is for cheating on her more than once because well, I’m a simple hoe and I love them more than life and they’re the reason I started watching SOA in the first place and I’d literally die for them no matter what.

So! Kurt Sutter stated in his IG Q&A that cheating on Tara was Jax’s way to punish himself because deep down he knew that he wasn’t worthy of her love (see the screenshot below). Well, y’all, it does make sense and it’s is refreshing for a simple hoe like me to know that cheating was Jax’s self-punishment and that he knew like the rest of us that Tara was too good for him (if you haven’t already noticed, this post is mainly for Tara stans and if you don’t have the heart for reading the praise of my girl, I suggest you stop reading), but I think there’s another explanation that goes along with the ‘self-punishment‘ thing.

Bobby Munson, the absolute legend, who was actually the only one who fully appreciated everything that Tara did for the club, states in s6: “Jax is someone who needs to be with someone.” Jax hates being alone and feeling lonely. He hates being emotionally and ideally contradicted and it’s shown numerous times in the show. So whenever he’s upset with Tara like a little child he goes to the arms of women that will definitely worship and make him feel like a big boy, but all this is always based on his sadness and hurt feelings (his hurt ego too, but I believe it’s mostly his hurt feelings) whenever Tara ‘upsets’ him.

The first time he cheats on Tara is with Wendy right after Donna’s murder. Jax and Tara are in a fight during that time and after THAT GLORIOUS SLAP he’s hurt and his ego is damaged. Wendy is there, offering him comfort and pleasure. I don’t think anyone doubts that if Jax and Tara knew exactly where they stood in their relationship, he would’ve gone to Tara for comfort and consolation. And an episode later he delivers this legendary line: “...because when I’m inside someone there’s only one face I see.” -and we’re automatically calm.

The second time he cheats on Tara is with Ima when Abel is kidnapped. He knows it’s not safe for her with SAMCRO during this hard and dangerous time, knows that she’s too stubborn and too in love with him and Abel to just pack up and leave. So he does one thing he’s sure will push her away to protect her, but right after Tara leaves the house with this iconic line: “...well, guess what?! The prince doesn’t always get his way.” - he goes after her with a pained and anguished face, clearly wanting to apologize and make things right, but he’s too late because she’s already gone.

Then he cheats on Tara with Colette when Tara’s in jail. Of course, he feels responsible for her arrest, but he’s also hurt like a little kid (again) because Tara doesn’t want him in court and goes to Colette to feel like a big boy again. (Ugh, bitch, the immaturity of this!! Tara was doing time FOR and BECAUSE of him and he couldn’t keep it in his pants for 10 fucking days when Tara was faithful to him for 14 months when he was inside)

So the last time is with Colette again when he finds out Tara’s divorcing him and taking the boys. I think that even though Jax stuggles to admit it, deep down he knows that he’s the reason for driving Tara away and making her act so radically. He says as much: “I understand why you did everything you did. I’m sorry being with me took you to that place.” and let’s not forget his face when Tara says: “...what happened to me?” Right after she walks in on Jax with Colette.

Bonus:

Winsome is the first person Jax sleeps with after Tara’s death and we all know how he breaks down when he realizes that the woman he was making love to was imagined and not present there physically in flesh. I think this was the first time I realized that “because when I’m inside someone there is only one face I see” proves true. And the scene is extra heartbreaking when you know that Tara’s actually dead this time not just away in Chicago.

Jax sleeps with Wendy right after he kills his wife’s murderer. I do think that it was the first time he truly enjoyed intimacy after Tara’s death but I feel like it was just like the ‘Donna’s death situation’. Anyway, though, the scene speaks for itself.

Okay so why the fuck did I write all this you ask. Well, one of the reasons is that I have way too much free time to spare but the main reason is to show that Jax cheats on my baby girl whenever he feels even the littlest bit upset with her. His infidelity is driven solely by loneliness which he can’t stand, so it’s clear that he uses sex as a coping mechanism, which, I think is the most immature way to deal with relationship issues but no one asked for my opinion right?

Anyway, neither Jax nor Opie btw is capable of dealing with their relationships in a mature way so they both use sex and women unjustifiably to avoid confrontation. This, too, is confirmed in season 1 when Jax says “Eh, you really wanna talk about this, huh? Cause one upside of Wendy, she was usually too wasted for relationship chats.”

I’m not justifying Jax’s infidelity or behavior. I’m just saying that his unfaithfulness has other deeper and twisted explanation that stems from Jax’s inability to cope with being alone and to face relationship problems maturely. You may not even agree with me and not think that Jax is wrong in the matter and that opinion is totally valid. But this is how I personally see this side of Jax.

#sons of anarchy #soa #tara knowles #tara knowles teller #jax x tara #jax teller #tig trager #gemma teller morrow #chibs telford #clay morrow #opie winston

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firemblem-fics · 4 years

Note

Hello, If you are still taking requests, could you write any of the prompts for Yuri please, anything is fine lol. Thank you! I love your blog uwu

betrayal. | yuri

50 Wordless Ways to Say I Love You: Giving them a tight hug that makes them lose their breath

-> Pairing: Yuri x Female!Reader

-> Warnings: Cursing, Violence, MAJOR CINDERED SHADOWS SPOILERS

-> Genre: One-Shot (1.3k), Some Fluff, Mostly Angst

-> A/N: This is like as canon-compliant as I could make it with the addition of the reader idk, I’m sorry it’s not quite “original” as much as it’s me rewriting the scene

“Finally, you’re all awake. Good morning, sleepyheads. Or is it a good evening?”

Yuri’s voice pierced through your skull, making your head throb. You heard the other Wolves talking to him- they sounded angry- but you were too weak to even open your eyes.

“You- you scoundrel!” Constance yelled, “You are unfit to speak with us, liar that you are!”

Yuri waved her off, seemingly uncaring about whatever the hell he was doing. You tried to keep quiet, fighting off a groan of actual pain, as you opened your eyes and peered up. Yuri was standing tall above the four of you, his sword in his hand. You, Constance, Balthus, and Hapi were tied up, lying on the ground in a chamber. What the fuck?

“What exactly are you trying to do here?” Balthus pressed.

“Aelfric intends to reenact the Rite of Rising.” Yuri sighs, then explains. “By offering up the blood of the four Apostles, you can bring someone to life. Saint Seiros attempted the ritual 995 years ago, but not enough blood was given, so the ritual was a bust. And now, through extreme persistence, Aelfric has found and gathered the four of us, with our Crests.”

“Okay, but what does that have to do with Y/N? She doesn’t even have a crest.” Hapi asked.

You were more awake now, gently sitting up as memories came to you. That’s right- Yuri had betrayed everyone. The Wolves, the professor, you… Your eyes burned with tears. The little bird certainly was only a rat. Yuri looked at you, a bit too long to mean nothing, and walked to the side, twirling his sword.

“She’s simply too strong. To have her go free is to risk too much. Aelfric can’t let this ritual fail. He spent his years raising us in the Ashen Wolf house all to ensure that the Rite of Rising was successful.”

“You mean to say that he intends to drain our blood? To kill us?!” Constance’s voice raised.

“Yeah, no, count me out.” Hapi joined in, “Wait- the number four includes you too, right? You’re gonna die too?”

“Yep. That’s the idea.”

You’d had enough of this talk. Yuri- Yuri wasn’t like this. You refused to believe it. He had been nothing but sweet to you, was it all really just a lie? Struggling to find your voice, you finally cried out.

“I can’t believe you!” Everyone’s head snapped towards you. “You- you filthy liar! You’re risking your life and everyone else’s for what? Some dead bitch? You’ve spent your whole life with these people to stab them in the back?”

“Y/N-” Yuri opened his mouth, but you cut him off.

“No, no! Fuck you, Yuri Leclarc. Or are you lying about your name too? I can’t believe I trusted you- or any of us. You took advantage of everyone’s kindness and now you’re throwing everyone’s life away.” You spat at him. If you weren’t avoiding his gaze now, you would’ve seen hurt flash in his eyes.

That hurt hardened quickly as he saw Aelfric watching from the corner. “Shut it. I've lived through Hell and worse. After clawing my way here, you really think I wanna die?”

“Then why throw your life away for the likes of Aelfric?” Asked Balthus.

“Some things are more important than my own life.” Yuri’s eyes shifted back to you for a moment, “Some things are worth protecting.”

“You’re not making any damned sense-”

“It would seem that you want to be punished severely, Yuri.”

Suddenly, Aelfric revealed himself, walking to Yuri with a threatening aura. Yuri only scoffed, defiantly speaking back to him. You couldn’t understand much, now, your vision was spotty with your migraine. You felt like throwing up, but that didn’t seem quite appropriate right now.

“-If I must, I will kill your mother alongside your dear people.” Aelfric finished his little speech as you focused on soothing your nausea. You kept blacking in and out between the conversation, missing bits of it. To focus on staying awake, you tried to grab the dagger that was strapped to your waist in order to cut yourself free.

“The whole ‘evil villain’ outlook doesn’t look good on someone as pious as you, Aelfric.” Yuri laughed. You paused, wondering why he would insult his boss.

“Yuri-bird, I could-”

“Not yet,” He hissed at Hapi. You continued to fidget, getting your ropes to the blade and beginning to saw through them.

You were about halfway through when three figures, coated in masks and dark outfits came forth and took hold of the three downed Wolves. A fourth walked in front of you, raising his hand to knock you out once more. You flinched back, awaiting for the impact, but it never came. Opening your eyes, you saw Yuri holding the man’s wrist.

“You will not touch her.” He threatened, “Or else.”

The figure left and you could only sit back and watch as Aelfric sliced the four Wolves, spewing some goddess-awful monologue to Yuri. Bells chimed and Aelfric began to look panicked, much like you were. You said you hated Yuri, but that was far from the truth.

In the past time that you had gotten to know him, his sly, cunning antics had begun to grow on you. A lot. Before you knew it, you had found yourself becoming quite fond of the house leader, wanting to fight alongside him and spend your time conspiring with him. With as big of a crush that you had on the boy, it was only normal that you would feel so betrayed by him. Hell, you weren’t even going to die (yet, probably), and yet you were still just as upset as the other wolves.

“Oh, and just so you know, I’ve been working for Lady Rhea since before I ever began working for you.”

Your utter surprise at Yuri’s words made you snap the last bit of rope that you had to cut. So, he was on your side the whole time?

“It matters no longer. The ritual is almost done. Just a little bit longer…” Aelfric tried to reason- with Yuri or himself, you couldn’t tell.

Yuri scoffed and you began to stand up, drawing your weapon. “Don’t think for a moment-”

“That I’ll let anything happen to them!” You yelled, suddenly charging towards the man. Your fist collided with Aelfric’s jaw, knocking him to the ground as the other Wolves stood up.

“Seriously, Boss, did you have to tie us up so tight?” Balthus complained, rubbing his wrist.

“Sorry, Balthus,” Yuri laughed, “I figured those little tears would be enough for you to break through the rope.”

“I hate to interrupt the relief party,” You walked up to the group and shoved the blade of your weapon against Yuri’s throat. “But I’m still quite angry, and I’d like to take it out on some people I actually can beat up.”

Yuri gave you a watery smile and gently pushed down the blade, tilting his head at you. “I’m sorry.”

You scrutinized Yuri for a moment before dropping your weapon and rushing towards him, knocking him back a few steps as your arms wrapped around him. You heard him grunt a little and you smile, squeezing him even tighter. Yuri eventually relaxes and wraps his arms around you as well, resting his head on top of yours. “Don’t fucking do that again.”

“Do you still hate me? I think you do, because you’re squeezing me so tight I can’t breathe. Not complaining, though.”

You looked up at him, ignoring the professor and the other knights as they filed into the chamber, ready to fight. “No, I could never. Even if you really had betrayed us…” You looked away from his gaze, but he tilted your chin back up.

“I couldn’t betray you all. That would mean never getting a bone-crushing hug from you again and now that it’s started, I don’t want it to stop.”

You laughed and tip-toed up, pressing a light kiss against his cheek. “Whatever, you sap. Let’s go kick some ass.”

#fire emblem #fire emblem three houses #fire emblem x reader #fire emblem imagines #fire emblem three houses x reader #x reader #fire emblem three houses imagines #requests #yuri #yuri leclerc imagine #yuri leclarc imagines #yuri leclarc x reader #yuri leclarc #yuri leclerc x reader #asks #lay writes #ask prompts #writing prompts

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trensu · 4 years

Text

Episode 50: The One with the Greatest Family Reunion(s) of All Time

so we start the ep with nhs's truly oscar-worthy performance which results in jgy getting stabbed

And i cheer for both the performance AND the stabbing!!!

lxc has his eyes closed bc that's his coping mechanism when times get tough

lol lxc is like I TOLD YOU I WASN'T GONNA HOLD BACK IF YOU DID ONE MORE BAD THING

and jgy is like i know!! that's why i haven't done one more bad thing!!!!

everyone's faces are like sure jan

but then they look at nhs like, wait a minute...

jgy is like why are you looking at him? you're not gonna see anything! i didn't see anything all these years and i'm smarter and sneakier than all of you!!!

okay, he didn't say that last part but it was def implied

jgy: nhs, good for you. i didn't expect that you would be my downfall.

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQ--uhhh, NIE HUAISANG!!

nhs hasn't broken character either! He needs to join a theater troupe or smth with those skills.

blah blah lxc and jgy are having Feelings blah blah blah lxc is conflicted blah

hm, those Feelings are becoming rather Dramatique

ugh jgy just let it go and die already

jgy: have I ever done you wrong?

UM?? how about KILLING his little brother's soulmate?

which resulted in him having to watch his little brother suffer extreme physical punishment and then grieve for years after??

PRETTY SURE THAT HURT LXC QUITE A LOT

Jgy: now you won't even give me a chance to live?

I THINK THE FUCK NOT!!!

oh we're getting some not so great special effects and jgy drags lxc to the coffin and then bleeds all over it, gross

ooooh, the Temple of Doom is starting to fall apart

lwj makes a move towards lxc but wwx grabs his arm and stops him!

bc it's dangerous to get too close and wwx is protective of his soulmate!!

jc starts the evacuation bc hello the building is crumbling and he gets everyone out except the lan bros, wwx and jgy

Jgy: stay and die with me

FUCK YOU JGY

but lxc was ready and willing to do that, so jgy shoves him back bc why the hell not

(we're gonna ignore how awkward that particular maneuver was, we already know special effects are not a priority in this show)

Jgy's like lets emotionally torment lxc some more, just for kicks, bc I'm an ASSHOLE

lwj catches his brother and he is Concerned.

Eventually our lan bros and wwx flee the temple and jgy has one last meltdown before getting crushed LIKE THE MAGGOT HE IS

Now we cut to a shot of all our crew standing outside

and we see my bratty son slowly fall to his knees with a look of UTTER SORROW AND PAIN ON HIS FACE

Bc he was BETRAYED by his nice uncle

MY POOR SON!!

we get reaction shots from wwx and the lan bros

(wwx continues to be beautiful even when sad)

oh, now lxc and nhs are having a moment sitting on the steps of the temple

lxc asks nhs if jgy really had made a move

nhs is like, you questioning me is making me doubt everything! idk idk!!

even amidst his grief he takes a moment to be completely exasperated by NHS's catchphrase lolol

now we cut to wwx sitting on a different set of stairs, carefully fiddling with his demon flute and he looks up to see jc watching him and HE SMILES

BC THAT'S HIS LITTLE BROTHER!!

AND THEY'RE ALL STILL MIRACULOUSLY ALIVE AFTER THAT HOT MESS!!

oooh, he's unwrapping his sleeve and we get a flash of his bare forearm

how scandalous! you're gonna give lwj vapors, wwx

We see the very last cut on his arm fade away bc finally mxy has been avenged

AND WWX SMILES AGAIN!!

cut to jc and jl watching wwx smile

bc i mean, who wouldn't be captivated by wwx's smile?

PEOPLE YOU CAN'T TRUST, THAT'S WHO

none of the sect leaders before were captivated by that smile AND LOOK WHAT HAPPENED!!!

oh that smile didn't stick around for long bc we hear barking!!

wwx gets this panicked wide-eyed expression that mAKES ME WANNA HIDE HIM AND PROTECT HIM FROM THE WORLD

But I also don't want to get murdered by LWJ's death glare so I'll just let him hide and protect wwx...

omg my bratty son looks SO HAPPY and shouts "fairy!!" before running towards his doggy friend

i'm not much of a dog person, tbh, but MY BRATTY SON IS SO HAPPY

and fairy did bring a whole crew of cultivators...

too little too late, some smart spiritual dog he is, lololol

we've got lan disciples, and jiang disciples and all these people swarming around our crew, fussing over them.

it's kind of sweet except i notice that no one's approached my bratty son

he is, in fact, ALL ALONE with fairy and i am OFFENDED on his behalf

not that my bratty son seems to mind

he's too wrapped up in his doggy reunion to notice BUT I NOTICED SO I'LL BE OFFENDED ENOUGH FOR THE BOTH OF US

wwx is smiling as he sees lwj and jc being fussed over by their respective disciples

so cute so CUTE, I love his smiles so much

lwj stands up and greets his uncle with a stately bow

god he's elegant and regal af, how the hell does he do it

but his uncle's a douchebag and barely acknowledges him before turning to leave and lwj watches him go, kind of hurt, kind of surprised

ooooh, now we get a shot of jc watching wwx as he gets questioned by oyzz

Oyzz is like what happened? Are you hurt? Is everyone okay??

and we can see wwx is still smiling!! BC MY BOY IS MADE OF SUNSHINE OKAY

awwwww

jl looks up with an ADORABLE smile on his face and tells fairy to wait outside

HE TAKES FAIRY OUTSIDE BC HE KNOWS WWX IS AFRAID OF DOGS!!!

My bratty son is actually very sweet!!

jc starts to leave the scene (and it's only until now that he stops staring at wwx btw) and wwx watches him go 😔

cut to a shot of lwj blatantly staring at wwx as per usual

wwx looks up and meets his gaze

they get lost in each other for a bit bc when DON'T they?

We’re at the steps of the temple again and we see nhs pick up jgy's crumpled up hat looking all contemplative

oops, nhs's fingers come away from the hat all tacky with blood, yuck

cut to my bratty son running back into the temple where all the cultivators are inspecting stuff and he asks ljy where wwx is

HE'S ASKING AFTER MY SUNSHINE BOY!

Y'know, his not-evil, not-angry uncle?

ljy tells him that he and hanguang jun left after they brought them lil apple

lol, the idea of ljy and oyzz dragging lil apple along just to return him to wwx cracks me up

jl tells ljy to take care of fairy for him before he dashes off to find his new uncle

BUT JC STOPS HIM?? "don't chase after them"

look at jc being all Cool leaning against that tree

in his fashionable robes

with his awesome sword tucked in the crook of his elbow

jl throws one last glance at the direction wwx and lwj left, and then joins jc under the tree

jc is like, they're long gone kid

jl: so that's it? you're letting them leave just like that??

jc: what else? invite them to stay for dinner? say thank you and then i am sorry??

lol, he's working himself up into a snit already

But also, like, MY BRATTY SON HAS A GOOD HEART, OKAY??

he just hides it under bluster bc he's sensitive and people are mean to him all the time!

HE WANTED TO CONNECT WITH WWX (AND MAYBE LWJ??) NOW THAT THIS WAS ALL OVER

AND HE WOULD'VE DONE IT IF NOT FOR JC BEING ALL HUNG UP ON HIS ISSUES STILL

not that i hold that against jc, that's a lot of emotional trauma he's gotta work through

LOL JL IS NOT GONNA LET HIMSELF BE COWED BY HIS UNCLE BC WHEN DOES HE EVER?

JL: it was exactly bc of the way you were acting that they took off! you're such a pain in the neck!!

AND THEN HE POUTS AND FALLS INTO A CROUCH WITH HIS ARMS CROSSED AND STARTS SULKING UP A STORM

I LOVE MY BRATTY SON SO MUCH

JC: IS THAT HOW YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SPEAK TO YOUR ELDERS? ARE YOU ASKING TO GET DISCIPLINED??

these two crack me up every time, i swear

but the whole corporal punishment is...problematic

jc raises his arm to smack jl and jl ducks and raises his own arm to block the blow and i'm sitting here like, yikes

but then we get a shot of jc's open palm, out of focus with a crisp backdrop of red leaves from the tree they're under

and his hand is just held there, stilled for just a moment before the fingers start to gently curl inward and the strike never happens (thank god)

jc: lets go home, jin ling. let everyone go back to the place where they belong

he walks off with jin ling springing to his feet and chasing after him a beat later

jl: was there something you wanted to say to wwx?

have i mentioned i love my bratty son? BECAUSE I DO. A LOT.

jc: no, there isn't.

jl: bullshit!

I LOVE HIM!! WHAT A MOUTHY BRAT 💜

JL: i saw it with my own eyes! you wanted to talk to wwx! but you didn't say a word just now or back in the temple!

jc: there is nothing to say

jl: bullshit! you had something to say!

while this entire exchange is happening we see jc marching ahead, not looking at jl at all, but jl is walking backwards eyes pinned to his face the entire time

bc my son might be a brat but he's also pretty observant and he KNOWS his uncle

AND NOW WE GET A FLASHBACK

WE GET A BIG REVEAL

we're back at “the ones where we gross sob FOREVER”

and wwx is telling jc to stay put at the inn while he goes to get food and meds

his voice all weak and tremulous

but jc steps out of the inn for a moment after wwx leaves

AND SEES THAT THE WEN FLUNKIES CAUGHT SIGHT OF HIS BROTHER!!

they were like three feet away from grabbing his big brother

and he says internally, "take care. i'm leaving jyl in your hands"

AND I'M CRYING BC THEY'RE PLAYING THAT MUSIC

THAT SWEET TENDER MUSIC THEY PLAY WHENEVER JYL AND HER BROTHERS HAVE A MOMENT

Jc goes and causes a distraction and lets himself be caught by the wens

SO THAT HIS BIG BROTHER AND BIG SISTER COULD STAY SAFE

I'M CRYING I'M CRYING

MY YUNMENG SIBS, MY POOR YUNMENG SIBS!!

WHY DID THEY HAVE TO SUFFER SO??

WHY WERE THEY SO DAMN SELF-SACRIFICING???

WHY THE HELL COULDN'T THEY LEARN TO COMMUNICATE BETTER???

cut back to the present, and jc's eyes are welled up with tears

he has a hurt little smile on his face, he says, "take care"

softly, mostly to himself

after a moment, he turns to jin ling and says "lets go"

and we watch them leave

I just want them all to be a BIG HAPPY FAMILY DAMN IT

cut to the next scene, we hear ~THEIR SONG~ start playing in the background all slow and soft

i love the overhead shot we get of them surrounded by the gorgeous foliage, it's so peaceful

As wwx and lwj walk slowly and at ease with lil apple between them

AND MY HEART FEELS SO TENDER AND FULL OMG

lwj: wei ying

he says it all seriously. wwx looks at him and he's got A BIG SMILE ON HIS FACE

bc he's looking at his soulmate!!!

who wouldn't smile when looking at their soulmate???

he's cheerfully twirling his flute bc finally all is right in the world!

the mystery is solved, his loved ones are safe

and he's traveling with lwj and lil apple

nothing could be better!

wwx: whats up?

lwj is pointedly not looking at him

lwj: there is something that I…

and here he stops in his tracks, and wwx stops with him

lwj: i didn't tell you.

wwx gets all playful and leans on lil apple, and waggles his demon flute and lwj

wwx: what is it?

Look at that mischievous grin!!

he's all prepared to tease the heck out of lwj for whatever he's about to say LOL

but they're interrupted!!

wen ning and lan sizhui are running after them and wwx notices

LOLOL

His face scrunches up and he mutters under his breath like, damn it! every time!! these two are fast!

wwx: sizhui, why are you following us? aren't you afraid of old master lan calling you out?

MY SUNSHINE BOY IS SMILING SO MUCH THIS EPISODE, I'M SO HAPPY!!!

lsz: i have something important to ask you!

he's all out of breath!

wwx turns to look at lwj eyes wide and curious before going back to lsz

wwx: what is it?

lsz goes on to explain how he's been remembering things but he's unsure of stuff so he wanted to ask them about it

wwx looks confused and glances at lwj

lwj just looks back at him briefly before his eyes flick down

wwx: what is it that you want to know?

lsz looks down and, like, gathers up the strength needed for this next line of questioning.

with the sweetest smile, and the softest eyes he starts listing stuff

like how he knew a cocky chef who was actually a terrible cook

(wwx laughs confusedly at this)

and how that man planted him in a field and told him he'd grow faster with some watering and sunlight

AND WE GET A FLASHBACK OF LITTLE A-YUAN PLOPPED IN THE DIRT GETTING BURIED BY WWX

he goes on to say how that man would play with him

and how he had invited hunguang jun for a meal and then didn't pick up the tab so hanguang jun had to pay

There we get a flashback to their meal at the yiling wine house!

we cut back to the present and WWX'S FACE IS STUNNED, EYES WELLING UP WITH TEARS, AND LSZ IS GETTING CHOKED UP AS HE TELLS HIM THINGS

AND WWX'S BREATHING GETS SHAKY

BC LSZ TELLS HIM HIS SURNAME IS WEN

wwx blinks rapidly, not believing what he's hearing

wwx: wen was your surname? isn't lan your surname?

wwx: lan sizhui, lan yuan.. A-yuan?

AND OH GOD HIS FACE, HIS FACE

His eyebrows are furrowed

His eyes are full of tears!

he's looking at lsz like this has to be a dream bc it's too good to be true

Lsz nods jerkily

AND I'M TRYING TO HOLD BACK TEARS

HOW THE HELL IS LWJ WATCHING THIS ALL GO DOWN WITHOUT CRYING??

he's watching his son so intently

he's seeing his two most precious people reunite

and there are no tears??

I DON'T UNDERSTAND

HE'S VERY OBVIOUSLY MOVED BY THIS BUT NOT CRYING

MEANWHILE MY FACE IS A FREAKING RIVER OF EMOTION

lsz: i...i am a-yuan

and his voice all cracked with feeling

wwx huffs and is still shaky

wwx: didn't a-yuan pass away already?

he's thought his kid was dead this whole time

MY HEART, MY HEART

lwj had been staring at lsz this whole time but when he hears wwx say that, his gaze drops to the ground

HE FEELS ASHAMED (AS HE SHOULD BE!!) BC HE DIDN'T TELL WWX SOONER

wwx turns to lwj, hope and tentative joy in his voice

wwx: lan zhan, was it you?

lwj meets his gaze and says yes, his voice steady and firm

lwj: this was the thing i haven't told you about

Yeah, i know, i’ve been YELLING AT YOU ABOUT IT THIS WHOLE TIME

and wwx looks back at lsz, breath choppy and lsz flings himself into wwx's arms!!!

I AM SOBBING

lsz: i really missed you, i really missed you

THEY'RE BOTH CRYING AND CLINGING TO EACH OTHER SO HARD

OH GOD I NEED TISSUES

wwx laughs and sniffles

wwx: silly boy, why are you crying?

AS IF YOUR FACE ISN'T STREAMING WITH TEARS, WWX

lsz pulls back and scrubs his face in his sleeve

lsx: i wasn't crying. i was just feeling really sad and yet thrilled at the same time

YOU TWO STOP DENYING YOUR TEARS

IF I HAVE TO SIT IN A PUDDLE OF MY TEARS THEN YOU HAVE TO OWN UP TO YOUR OWN TEARS, YOU HEAR ME??

lsz: i couldn't put it into words

lwj: then don't

pffft, ofc lwj would be the one advocating for LESS WORDS lololol

wwx laughs at that

wwx: that's right. no need to say anything

then he starts his theatrics, bc he wouldn't be wwx without his theatrics

he leans on lil apple and rubs his own shoulder

wwx: damn, you little ones are strong, you are indeed a student of hanguang jun

he looks at lwj and points his demon flute at him

HE'S SO HAPPY

lwj: he is a student of yours as well

omg lwj delivers this line so sincerely

like, there was barely a pause between what wwx and what lwj responded with

he's so freaking earnest

LOL wwx straightens up at that and reaches for lsz

wwx: no wonder he is such a handsome boy!

Wwx, you are SHAMELESS

He giggles as he pats lsz’s face, it’s freaking adorable

lsz: master wei didn't teach me anything!

wow lsz, you've had your other dad back for all of five minutes and you're already sassing him?

he truly is wwx's son lol

wwx: i did! it was bc you were so little and you forgot

You’re sounding a bit defensive there, wwx...

lsz: yes, i seem to recall. i remember now

wwx immediately starts preening

wwx: you see. i've mentored him!

lsz: for example, switching the portrait of a beauty into--

wwx slams his hand over lsz's mouth, HIS FACE IS A PICTURE OF PANIC

LOLOLOL

lwj's eyes have widened slightly and developed an edge of Judgement

wn peeks at lwj out of the corner of his eyes like he's trying to gauge his reaction or smth lolol

wwx laughs awkwardly and takes his hand off lsz's mouth to shake a finger at him, wearing a tight smile on his face

lsz: and when a pretty lady passes by--

wwx: NONSENSE!!!

LOL I'M D Y I N G

wwx shouts this at the TOP OF HIS LUNGS to drown out lsz

he whirls on him pointing an accusatory finger and marches towards him as lsz scrambles back

wwx: nonsense! how come you're remembering these kinds of things? how could i teach little kids these things?

LOL HE'S TALKING SO FAST

lsz: you did! wen ning can testify!

wow, way to throw your uncle under the bus, lsz

kids these days have no filial piety!

wwx: there's nothing for wen ning to testify!

OMG WN AND LWJ IN THE BACKGROUND 🤣🤣🤣

as soon as lsz draws attention to him, wn looks at lsz like WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?

and lwj side-eyes wen ning SO HARD, like what the hell did you let wwx teach my son?

wwx: stop talking nonsense! i am telling you, little boy. lan zhan, what did you teach him?

AND WE GET THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SHOT OF LWJ HERE

as soon as wwx turns to him with his wild accusations, lwj gets this delightfully crooked smile on his face

and he looks down as if there's TOO MUCH JOY IN HIS HEART that he can't bear to watch for long

GOD THIS IS SUCH A BEAUTIFUL EXPRESSION ON HIS FACE.

and this marks, what, THE THIRD? the third time lwj smiles in public, all OUT IN THE OPEN?

I'M DYING, I'M DYING

wwx: when a-yuan was little and with me, he was a good boy!

lsz: it's the truth!

wwx: nonsense!

wwx: do you see that pit? no matter how big you've become, i will still plant you into that pit. understand?

lsz has a big grin on his face

wwx: what are you laughing at? you dumb boy!

AND THEN LSZ DROPS TO THE GROUND AND HUGS WWX'S LEG LIKE HE USED TO WHEN HE WAS A TODDLER

AND EVERYTHING IS WONDERFUL IN THE WORLD

wwx laughs to himself and lwj still has a small smile playing across his lips as he watches his son

wwx: a-yuan, you are too old for this

AS IF HE'S NOT LOVING EVERY SECOND OF IT

wwx: do you remember, you used to grab hanguang jun's leg when you were little, just like this?

so many wonderful flashbacks of little a-yuan clinging to his parents’ legs!!

oh god, oh god, my heart, my heart is going to explode from all the tender feelings!! Look at their faces

wwx's mouth slowly curls into a smile before it grows INTO A FLASH OF HIS SQUINTY-EYED SMILE

you know the one!

the one that stretches SO BIG WITH HAPPINESS IT LIGHTS UP THE WHOLE WORLD?? YEAH, THAT ONE

and then we cut to lwj's face

he has the softest expression on his face

he's got this gentle, tiny smile, the slightest of curves at the corners of his mouth

and in his eyes are SO FULL OF LOVE AND WARMTH as he watches his soulmate smile at him with their son clinging to his soulmate's leg

AND I MUST'VE DIED AND GONE TO THE GOOD PLACE BC THIS IS JUST TOO BEAUTIFUL TO BE REAL

now we cut to a different scene, lwj and lsz are in the background have some sort of father-son chat, while wwx and wn chill in the foreground

here we find out that wn and lsz plan to go back to qishan to build some sort of memorial to their loved ones

wwx: i'll come with you

wn: that won't be necessary

wwx: you don't want me to tag along?

aw, my sunshine boy looks kinda hurt 😔

but wn assures him that that's not the case. it's just that wwx has already done more than enough for them and it's time for wen ning to go out on his own

wwx gets all teary-eyed again and pats him on the shoulder, and agrees that that's for the best

lsz and wn split off, and wwx waves his demon flute cheerfully at them, lwj at his side

wwx turns to lwj with a smile

wwx: lan zhan, lets go!

he says happily, with confidence, then he taps chenqing on his head a couple of times

wwx: where should we go?

he grins, pulling lil apple along with him, so cheerfully!

wwx: let's get going, lil apple!

but lwj isn't turning with him

he's still in that spot, his back towards wwx who already was forging onto his next adventure

AND MY HEART IS BREAKING

BC WHY HASN'T HE TURNED TO FOLLOW WWX???

wwx slows to a stop as he notices the absence of white robes at his side AND ~THEIR SONG~ STARTS PLAYING AGAIN

he turns back slowly to look back at lwj, confused

there is too much distance between them!!

TOO MUCH!

multiple yards of distance where there should be NONE!

THERE SHOULD BE NONE DISTANCE!!!!!!

WHY ISN'T THERE NONE DISTANCE??!?!

lwj is still facing away from wwx, he's still rooted to the spot and his face has gone blank

wwx: lan zhan, you...aren't you coming with me?

HE SOUNDS SO CONFUSED, SO TIMID

HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT'S HAPPENING

and there's a too long pause during which wwx's eyes are desperately pinned to lwj's back

finally, FINALLY, lwj turns ever so slowly to face wwx

wwx is staring at him and lwj can only meet his eyes briefly before they slowly turn downwards

wwx gets this tiny hurt smile on his face and nods as his eyes well with tears again but this time THEY ARE NOT HAPPY TEARS

these are "i knew this was too good to be true" tears

these are "of course i can't keep good, pure lan zhan at my side" tears

these are "this is exactly what i deserve" tears

lwj looks up again, and wwx gives him a nod and a smile bc he doesn't want lwj to feel guilty for leaving him

LEAVING HIM

HE'S LEAVING HIM AGAIN

WHY

WHY IS THIS HAPPENING

the camera pulls out, really emphasizing the distance and the sudden quiet that falls between them is severely lacking any words of explanation

AND I'M SCREAMING INTERNALLY BC WTF WHY

we cut to a truly impressive shot of the cloud recesses, followed by a cut to a waterfall

I’m pretty sure it's the same waterfall from when they were kids and had that sword fight

and we hear the opening notes of ~Their Song~ played on the flute

wwx walks into view on the shore of the pond the waterfall goes into, with his flute at his lips

in the background we see that lwj is at the opposite shore closer to the waterfall, sitting cross-legged with his guqin in his lap

AND THEN THEY GIVE US VOCALS

bc watching them play ~THEIR SONG~ TOGETHER BUT AT A DISTANCE WASN'T PAINFUL ENOUGH

and jfc the shots of the waterfalls in this area are freaking gorgeous

now we see them standing together on the same boulder over a smaller waterfall

bc our boys have an aesthetic

that aesthetic is moonlight and waterfalls, and they're sticking to it

wwx: lan zhan, tbh, it surprised me that you would take over the role of his excellency

lwj: we made a vow here

and we get a flashback to the lantern scene and hear those vows they made as kids

Back in the present, wwx smiles, and knocks back the jar of wine that he has with him bc the mystery has been solved BUT HIS ALCOHOLISM HASN'T!

and i'm sitting here SCREAMING INTERNALLY, FUCK THOSE VOWS.

YOU'VE GOT NEW, BETTER VOWS, WHICH ARE NEVER EVER LEAVE EACH OTHER'S SIDES EVER AGAIN, DAMN IT

wwx turns to face lwj

wwx: lan zhan, you truly deserve your title, hanguang jun

and lwj turns to look back at him

lwj: and you too, wei ying

we are BLESSED with wwx's wide, squinty-eyed smile

and lwj graces us with his soft, small, secret smile

they stare at each other for a moment before turning back to gaze off into the distance

the camera pulls back to gift us with the gorgeous scenery that surrounds them

now we cut to them walking down the steps towards that big rock full of ridiculous gusulan rules

nhs is there! with his fan!

nhs: this is unexpected. cloud recesses has added another thousand rules.

wwx: nhs, no matter how many rules are added, there is one that matters most. do you know what it is?

nhs looks so at ease here

this entire time since we got back to the present to watch wwx solve this mystery, nhs was nervous, twitchy and flaky in every scene

but here, he stands straight and serene with a confidence we have not yet seen on him til now

nhs: i have no clue

he says this and it doesn't sound anything like his usual anxious, dopey, "idk idk i really don't know"

nhs: please advise, wwx.

and wwx strides up until he's right next to nhs, shoulder to shoulder, tho they're facing opposite directions

wwx: that would be...

he leans down, and lowers his voice

wwx: "thou shall not befriend the devil"

there has been a distinct lack of background noise or music since this scene started

but the minute those words leave wwx's mouth, we get ominous music.

nhs keeps his harmless act as he meets wwx's eyes and they share a laugh

(a laugh of acknowledgement, of recognition of each other's skills)

nhs: wwx, you have the nerve

wwx: no i wouldn't dare. i'm no match for you.

the words they're exchanging SOUND carefree and easy on the surface, but they definitely carry some underlying tension

nhs notices lwj watching them and bows respectfully

nhs: your excellency

he turns to leave, fan open against his chest

wwx: clan leader nie, i have one question that i would love to get your opinion on.

nhs: go on

wwx: you have put in so much effort and energy, don't you want to be the Excellency?

wwx is gauging nhs's threat level to lwj

bc with the skills nhs has developed and the cover he has, it really wouldn't be all that difficult for him to depose lwj if he wanted, you know?

but nhs has never been the ambitious sort

he was perfectly content with his art, and his fans, and his porn, and being second young master, nothing more (UNTIL FUCKING JGY RUINED IT ALL)

nhs: wwx, it was once said that we can never get tired of these scenes; earth and sky, woods and fields, lakes and rivers, the mountain and the sea

nhs: as for me, i am a sensible man. if i have to, i always do it myself.

nhs: but for the things that aren't my business, i won't meddle in

and i'm not sure if there's something i'm missing, some layer of context or whatever,

but what i get from this is that nhs is saying everything has its place and he has no desire to go outside of his own place in the world

if the situation calls for it, he will intervene but ONLY if there's no one else willing or able to step in

really, this is just his poetic way of saying, i have no interest in hurting hanguang jun or stealing his power

lwj walks up to join wwx as the two of them watch nhs leave

lwj: aren't you going to ask him?

wwx: ask him what?

wwx: who let mxy out? who released the blade spirit? who found sisi and bicao? and who wrote that anonymous letter?

and he gets this unconcerned expression on his face

with a little pout he just goes on to say that these questions don't matter anymore

and he walks off, twirling his flute

we cut to the next scene and our boys are standing face to face on a grassy hilltop. wwx points behind lwj

Brief aside to say, i love the robes lwj wears here, they’re very very pretty. White and pale blue, they look very airy and light

wwx: i will head that way

and lwj points with bichen behind wwx

lwj: i will head this way

AND THEN THEY JUST STARE AT EACH OTHER FOR A BIT

BC THEY DON'T REALLY WANNA SAY GOODBYE, DO THEY?

lwj: have you decided where you are going to go?

wwx shakes his head and tilts his chin up

wwx: it's a big world that we live in. i will wander with my fine wine and a ride, and make it my home

*cries softly* but you have a home, LWJ is your home, why are you leaving

lwj lowers his gaze

probs bc he is thinking the same thing i was

let lwj be your home, wwx

wwx: lan zhan, i will get going

and lwj gives him one single, barely there nod of the head

bc he doesn't want wwx to go!!!

but he doesn't want to hold him back either...

wwx walks past him with a smile, dragging lil apple along with him and cheerfully he says:

"as long as the sea is bound to wash up on the sand and stars are above you, we will meet again."

and lwj just watches him leave before steeling himself to turn and walk off to his wwx-less future

but as he walks, he hears wwx playing their song on his flute so he pauses to turn back slightly

and we hear wwx’s voice over, "lan zhan, next time we see each other, you better have a name for this song."

as lwj continues walking, we hear his voice over, "way ahead of you."

and he seems slightly less sad at their parting.

AND NOW WE'RE GETTING THE FUCKING VOCALS AGAIN BC THE SHOW JUST LOVES TEARING OUR HEARTS OUT OF OUR CHEST

we get a gorgeous shot of a green cliff side and of course the cliffside has a couple of pretty waterfalls

wwx standing alone, playing on his flute, and the camera is lovingly caressing all of wwx's best features

we get a beautiful close up of wwx's lips resting over the mouthpiece of his flute, aND I THANK EVERY DEITY IN EXISTENCE FOR IT

and it's not immediately apparent bc wwx always wears dark form fitting robes

but the robes he's wearing in this scene are DEFINITELY DIFFERENT from the ones he was wearing when he and lwj parted ways

MEANING SOME TIME HAS PASSED

we have no way of knowing how much time

COULD BE AN HOUR! COULD BE A DAY! COULD BE A COUPLE OF YEARS!!

WE JUST DON'T KNOW

but time has passed

wwx is playing ~Their Song~ alone on that hill, the vocals are like honey to the ears and they crescendo to give us an overwhelming swell of emotion

the music peeters off until it's just wwx's flute reaching the last notes of ~Their Song~

as he is finishing we hear lwj's voice

"Wei Ying."

wwx freezes, like he's wondering if he imagined that voice

the music is completely gone, everything is utterly silent and wwx's face is completely open as he lowers his flute

a smile starts to curl at his mouth, small and tentative and as he turns around, ~Their Song~ crescendos into existence again

and wwx's smile grows incredulous and relieved and SO FULL OF LOVE AND JOY

I DIE, I DIE!

MY BEAUTIFUL SUNSHINE BOY

and we fade to black

bc that's where it ends

That's it

THAT'S ALL THERE IS, WE MADE IT TO THE END!

IT'S OVER, THERE'S NO MORE. MY LIFE NO LONGER HAS MEANING. OMG I JUST BURST INTO TEARS. WHY IS THIS AFFECTING ME SO MUCH

I KNEW THIS WAS COMING. I'VE SEEN THIS THREE OTHER TIMES ALREADY!! OH GOD OH GOD, I MISS WWX'S FACE ALREADY. GIVE ME BACK MY SUNSHINE BOY, LET ME KEEP HIM FOREVER *SOBS*

Hang on, hang on, just give me a minute. *deep breath* Okay, i’m good, i’m good now.

This show is just...it’s so beautiful in every way except CGI lol and it evokes so many visceral feelings. It’s passionate, is what it is. And not in the sexual way “passionate” has been forced to become. This show is passionate the way passion is supposed to mean: piercing anguish, burning anger, utter devotion...just overwhelming feeling

But most importantly, the passion in this show is intense love:

Platonic love; see how much our main cast gave up to aid their friends and dependents

Familial love; look at the lengths those brothers and sisters went for each other

Romantic love; watch how these two soulmates returned to each other again and again regardless of all the obstacles between them

I honestly can’t think of another show that’s done this so well. I am just so grateful to have been able to watch this show, to have gotten to know these characters even tho it’s raised my standards for future shows to ridiculously high levels

So that’s it! We’ve reached the end of the guide! Now we can go back and re-visit our favorite scenes whenever we want!

Return to Masterpost

#WangXiantics #wangxian #the untamed #cql

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cursesthemusical · 4 years

Text

hestadil fic

ok so I posted about a hestadil fic I wrote earlier and I figured I’d just share it here, bc why not? It’s called coward, set during AWWP right after the trial, and it’s about 3.5k words so, not too long? anyway yeah hope you like it :) oH and if you wanna read it on ao3 instead, the link’s in my. . . profile? past posts? idk what to call them

(and yes this is mostly because I want to put off doing geometry homework shh)

“A-Anadil-”

“Shh, shh,” Anadil whispers to Hester, trying to disguise the fear in her voice. Hester’s whole face is bloodied and her leg is bent the wrong way and her usually piercing eyes look so tired and who even is this girl under Anadil’s arm, because Hester is always so strong? What has the world come to if Hester looks like this? It’s up to Anadil to take care of her friend, and that scares her, because she’s always been a sidekick. She’s never had to lead. But right now, she tells herself sharply, she has to be here for Hester and not be scared even though she is so freaking scared.

She looks up and sees Lady Lesso running towards them, black hair flowing in a rare ponytail. Anadil’s heart stops again because everything’s so, so wrong. Their dean is always perfectly poised, not a single hair out of her braid, purple dress immaculate. Now she looks a mess, even more than Sophie on that first day of school. Her dress is dirty and her cheeks are blotchy, and the dean’s fear only seems to worsen when she sees the state Hester’s in.

“Anadil, what happened?” Lady Lesso demands.

“A-Aric - his princes -” she stammers. Truthfully, she didn’t see everything that happened. All she knows is that they were fighting the princes, the Coven as one, and then Hester fell and Anadil reached for her friend’s flag, her mind and body screaming in pain, and dropped it, but not before seeing that Hester was almost dead.

No, is. Is almost dead.

Lady Lesso’s face pales. “Aric. . .” She hesitates for a second, but then shakes her head, dispelling some image from her mind. All of a sudden, there’s another flash and Dot appears in the field, looking shocked but with no injuries except a minor gash across one arm.

“Hester!” Dot cries, rushing to her friend. Hester only manages a weak gasp in response, and Dot’s face pales. “What do we do?” she asks, turning to Lady Lesso, tears in her large eyes. She grabs a clump of grass from the ground and twists it in her hands viciously, then shoots a blast of brown magic at it and turns it to chocolate. Anadil doesn’t even think she knows she’s doing it.

Lady Lesso is silent for a moment, looking out over the Blue Forest. “Things are happening tonight, girls. Things I never thought would happen. A lot’s going to be different after tonight.” She pauses, and when she starts talking again, her voice is hard. “Anadil, are you injured?” Anadil shakes her head mutely. “Good. Dot, since you were the last one out of you three, I want you to stay here and tell me absolutely everything you remember. Anadil, bring Hester to the medical ward and stay with her at least until she’s under. We all could use a friend right now.”

Anadil and Dot nod resolutely, both determined to help with whatever they can. “Off with you,” Lady Lesso says to Anadil, the dean’s purple fingerglow lighting. She waves it, muttering something under her breath, and then Hester’s floating up in the air, surrounded in a purple glow. “She’s Bonded to you, Anadil - until the spell breaks, she’ll float after you when you walk. Now, go. She’s not in a good state.”

Scared, Anadil nods and starts walking. True to Lady Lesso’s words, Hester’s body follows her, and so do her rats, who are whimpering. One jumps up onto Hester’s prone form, and Anadil’s about to command it to get off when she sees Hester’s face relax a bit at the sensation of the pale grey fur brushing the witch’s cheek. She bites her lip and continues on, faster. Once she’s in the School, Dean Dovey meets her and ushers her into the hospital wing, not even bothering to look at Hester. There’s no time to waste.

Once Anadil, Hester, the rats, and the Dean are all in the hospital wing, Dean Dovey closes her eyes and pale blue magic surrounds Hester, taking her out of Anadil’s aura and on to a bed. A nymph rushes over and starts washing strips of gauze as Anadil watches, not able to tear her eyes away from Hester.

“Er. . . Anadil? Do you want to go back to your dorm, or outside, perhaps?” Dean Dovey asks her in a soft voice so as not to disturb the nymph.

“No.” Anadil’s voice may come out harsher than intended, but Hester is almost dead.

Her best friend is almost dead.

She thinks she can be as harsh as she wants.

“All right,” the Dean says. Anadil’s surprised she doesn’t press further, but she lets it alone and sinks into a chair, her rats crowding on to her lap. The four pairs of red eyes are all focused on the girl in the bed, black and red hair spilling out over the pillow. Hester looks more vulnerable than Anadil’s ever seen her, face covered with gashes and a pained frown twisting her features.

The nymph takes a second to look at Anadil, asking a silent question - are you hurt? One of Aric’s blasted princes got Anadil’s own leg, but it didn’t reach any major arteries or veins and really, it barely hurts. And of course, Anadil’s had worse.

Unconsciously, she strokes a raised scar on her arm, where a Bloodbrook boy cut her with a knife after she told everyone she liked girls and only girls. She’d had to get stitches, and it still twinges painfully now and then. She doesn't understand why people don’t like girls loving girls and boys loving boys. Even though she’s a witch, she’ll never hate people for loving. She knows what it’s like to love.

She tucks a lock of white hair over her shoulder and leans back against the chair. If she’s going to stay - which, of course she is, Hester’s her best friend in the world - she’ll need to be comfortable. Slowly, her eyes drift closed, and she falls into a restless sleep, dreaming of blood and savage purple eyes and shadowy trees rising all around her and Hester.

About an hour later, she wakes up, jolting out of a nightmare by a faint voice calling her name. She takes a deep breath, holding her rats close, then searches for the source of the voice.

“A-ani?”

Only one person calls her Ani.

She hurries to drag her chair closer to Hester’s bed and puts her pale hand over Hester’s. “You’re awake!” she says, tears threatening to spill over. Why is she crying? She wasn’t crying before.

“Ani,” Hester says again, then coughs, blood staining her lips as she does. Anadil looks around the room frantically, but the nymph is gone. She presses a tissue to Hester’s mouth, hoping against hope that Hester will be okay.

She doesn’t know what she’ll do if Hester’s not okay.

She doesn’t know how she’ll live if Hester’s not right there beside her.

Hester coughs again into the tissue, and Anadil’s relieved to see that there isn’t as much blood this time. Maybe Hester will be absolutely fine, maybe she’ll be out of the hospital by tonight and they’ll be back to planning pranks and they’ll think of a new mean nickname for Sophie tomorrow morning, knees and shoulders pressed together, Dot hovering over them and force feeding them chocolate (however much Hester gripes about how villains shouldn’t eat candy, Anadil knows she loves white chocolate. Anadil knows everything about Hester.). Maybe at lunch they’ll be back to practicing light curses on each other while they eat gruel and complain about how annoying having school with the Evers is. Maybe everything will be back to normal, and Anadil will never have to tell Hester how much she likes her, because Hester will be alive for a long time and there’ll be no chance of Hester dying without knowing how Anadil really feels.

How does Anadil really feel towards Hester?

She knows. She’s known since first year.

But she can’t say it. Not even to herself. Evil’s supposed to be strong, fearless, outspoken, and here she is, not able to say three simple words. How cowardly.

She wants to run and not look back, run out of the school, to Bloodbrook even though she hates Bloodbrook with all her heart. To her mother who’s still looking for a fairytale of her own. To the memories of her grandmother, the Witch she wanted to be. To a château full of lost hope and sadness and evil. To a life not worth living. And away from Hester, the girl who Anadil would die for, the girl who Anadil cares about more deeply than she’s ever cared for anything in her whole life. Away from the confusion and the blood still dripping down Hester’s leg. Away from her feelings.

How fucking cowardly.

A hitched sob claws out of her throat and now she’s crying again and villains shouldn’t cry but she can’t stop the tears from spilling down her thin face and down onto her trial uniform, soaking into the blue silk fabric. Hester looks shocked at first, then folds her other hand over Anadil’s. “Ani,” she says, and her voice comes out stronger, and the tears clear out enough for Anadil to see Hester’s face, her dark eyes wide and filled with love.

Not love. Hester doesn’t love Anadil in the way Anadil loves Hester. That at least, she’s sure about.

“Sleep,” Hester whispers, and Anadil can’t even find the strength to choke out that Hester’s the one who’s hurt, Hester’s the one who needs to sleep. Instead she leans back in her chair and closes her eyes, acutely aware of the fact that Hester’s watching her. Finally, it feels like someone cares for her.

When she wakes again, her rats have burrowed into her trial uniform, her hair covering them like a blanket. The nymph is in the room now too, busily wetting fresh bandages. She looks over and gives Anadil one of her nymph smiles, a bit mysterious and otherworldly but still a smile. Hester’s awake and propped up on her arms in her bed, staring off into space. Their hands are still folded together, and Anadil feels faint when she looks at the bed. She looks away, trying not to think about how Hester’s finger is absentmindedly stroking Anadil’s palm.

“Oh, you’re awake,” Hester says, sounding cheery, and Anadil’s forced to look back. “You know, the gash in my leg isn’t bleeding anymore. Bet Aric’s mad. We’re gonna have to get revenge on him, you know.” She doesn’t mention Anadil crying - last night, she thinks it was - and Anadil says a silent thank you. One of her rats jumps onto Hester’s bed and cuddles into Hester’s side, then peers at Anadil as if to say tell her. “Shut up,” Anadil whispers to the rat.

“What?” Hester asks.

“Um. Nothing,” Anadil says, giving a last glare to the rat. “What were you saying?”

“Revenge.” Hester’s eyes get that evil gleam Anadil knows so well. “On Aric. He did almost kill me. We should almost kill him in return.”

Anadil tries not to think about the “we”. “How?”

“I don’t know. Sophie could probably think of something. Scream at him?” They both laugh, although the mood is subdued. Hester did almost die.

The door slams open, and both of them turn to see Dot nibbling on some chocolate and staring at them. “Hester, how are you?” she says, moving closer.

“Not dead anymore,” Hester says. Anadil can’t tell if it’s a joke or not. Neither can Dot, apparently, because she frowns.

“Well, er, that’s good,” Dot says, but Dot can never stay sad for long (not unless she’s thinking about her father) and she quickly brightens, pulling something round and brown from behind her back. “I got you a get well present,” she says cheerfully. “I saw a doorknob on the way here and unscrewed it and now it’s chocolate. And I did a Solidify spell on it so it wouldn’t melt.” She presents the doorknob to Hester, who takes a bite.

“Really good,” Hester tells Dot, who grins. Anadil’s just about to ask whether it was the only doorknob on the door when they hear a shout from far off in the Evil castle.

“Who locked me in this merlinforsaken closet?!” A volley of curses follows it. It sounds like Beezle. The three witches look at the door to the medical room then at each other, then burst out laughing. This time it’s real laughter.

Dot takes a chair and drags it next to Anadil’s, and they sit (or lie) in silence for a while after the last giggles stop. Anadil glances at Hester occasionally, who’s toying with a loose thread on her blankets. She’s still kicking herself for being such a coward. She’s missed her chance to tell Hester how she feels. How she shouldn’t feel. She’s a witch. Hasn’t her grandmother told her hundreds of times that witches don’t love? Hasn’t that been drilled into them from the very beginning of School? The Good love. The Evil hate.

Even when the boundaries between Good and Evil are changed into Girls and Boys, she’s still a witch. And witches don’t love.

But Anadil does.

What does that mean?

Probably that she’s going to be expelled if anyone finds out.

So it was good that she didn’t say anything.

Maybe if she thinks that enough it’ll be true.

She sighs, slumping in her chair. One of her rats climbs into her hand and she strokes its fur absentmindedly. Dot and Hester have struck up a conversation about whether Hester’s demon likes chocolate, so Anadil’s lost to her thoughts. She remembers her mother, giving her three rats when she was two. In hindsight, she was probably supposed to kill them, establishing herself early as a witch. Evil parenting strategies. . . definitely aren’t the kindest, though they can be effective.

She doesn’t know who her father is. Actually, she’s not sure if she has one. She looks almost like a carbon copy of her mother, and there are some ways of having a child by magic in the Woods. And of course, Evil doesn’t love.

She tries not to look at Hester.

A few hours later, Lady Lesso pushes open the door, looking even worse than she did two days ago. When she sees them, her eyes widen. “You three. . . you don’t know. . .”

“Know what?” Hester asks, her demon flying shaky circles around her head.

“On the night of the Trial. . . I’ll spare you the details. But Agatha and Tedros are gone, back to Gavaldon, Dean Sader is presumed dead, and Sophie kissed the School Master.” Lady Lesso puts a hand to her head, looking up at the ceiling as if to say can’t we just have one normal year at this school? She looks back at the coven. “Don’t trouble yourselves with it just yet, though, all right? We’ll deal with this when we come to it. Hester, are you feeling alright?”

“B-better,” Hester stammers, looking shocked by the slew of information.

“Good.” Lady Lesso gives them a weak smile and casts a purple spell at Hester. “I just came in to do this healing spell. I’m only sorry I didn’t do it earlier. It won’t completely heal you, but it’ll speed it up by quite a bit.”

Hester nods stiffly, still processing, but still the leader and Lady Lesso laughs, a rare thing for their dean. “I’m sorry. Please don’t worry about anything just yet. Everything will be alright.” Nobody believes that, but they all nod in unison and Lady Lesso turns, pushing the door open and walking out. Hester, Anadil, and Dot look at each other.

“So,” Dot says, her voice shaking. With laughter or fear, Anadil can’t tell. “That. . . happened. I guess.”

Anadil nods, feeling the way Dot’s voice sounded. “She said not to worry about it.”

Hester smiles. “So we won’t. Not yet, at least. Let’s just, you know, do what we always do. At least while I’m still in the hospital.” Her demon makes a sound that’s kind of like a laugh and settles back into Hester’s neck, melting into its tattoo form. Anadil stares at it. Two years, and she still can’t get over how cool it is. How cool Hester is.

At night, Dot leaves, promising to bring back more chocolate in the morning. She winks at Anadil, and the white haired witch gives her a glare in return, remembering how she and Dot told each other their biggest secrets in one particularly late night in their first year, when Hester was in the library researching love potions with Sophie. Anadil hadn’t told her friend exactly what she felt - she didn’t even know exactly what she felt at that time - but she had rhapsodized about Hester’s hair for a while and Dot had put it together even faster than she did. Anadil was pretty sure Dot wasn’t leaving because she had a project to finish.

“Ani?” Hester said sleepily around eleven o’clock.

“Yes?”

“Can you come here?” Anadil moves her chair closer to Hester’s bed, heart thundering. They’re close enough now that if Anadil were to lean down just a few inches, her hair would touch Hester’s face. “Are you okay?”

Hester shuts her eyes tightly, then reopens them and looks up at Anadil, a rare soft smile curving her lips. “Yeah. Just. . .” She scrunches her nose, and Anadil has to admit, it looks adorable. “I need you, Ani. I hate that I need you, but I do.”

“I need you too.” Anadil’s voice comes out too quiet, but Hester hears. She always hears, even when no one else does. Even when Anadil’s mother or grandmother doesn’t hear her, Hester does. And Hester listens.

She’s really in this deep, isn’t she.

“You don’t understand.” Hester looks down at her sheets, the clean white stained with drops of red. “I need you, Anadil. In a way that I’m not supposed to need anyone.”

If Hester’s saying what Anadil thinks she’s saying, this is the most wonderful moment of Anadil’s life. She feels shivery, freezing cold and burning hot at the same time, like she’s encased in clouds and floating high above everything. Is this how Evers feel when they get asked to the ball? It must be. No other feeling she’s had has been as beautiful as this “I know.”

“You know?” Black eyes meet red, both girls still. Anadil doesn’t feel witchy right now. These past years, she’s been trying to make herself older than she is, older and more mature and more evil. But really, she’s only sixteen. She’s still just a girl. And right now, she feels young and beautiful and in love.

“Yes,” she says, sure of herself. This is what she wants. “I know,” she whispers.

Hester props herself up on her arms and looks at Anadil, wonder in her eyes. They lean towards each other, and it’s definitely uncomfortable, but all Anadil can think is that it’s happening. And when their lips touch, it feels like home. More home than the Bloodbrook château, certainly, more home than the School for Evil, more home than anything’s ever been. And she knows now what that warm feeling she gets when she’s with Hester is.

Belonging.

The kiss is light, fleeting, filled with the promises of more kisses and love and forever. They pull away and stare at each other, both blushing. “I love you, Hester,” Anadil says quietly, her voice shaky. For a terrible moment, Hester’s eyes get wide and Anadil’s so scared she’s done something wrong.

But then Hester smiles and says, “I love you, Anadil,” and even though she’s still got blood on her lips and her hair is a tangled mess and her voice is scratchy, she’s the most beautiful thing Anadil’s ever seen.

The Good love. The Evil hate.

Not anymore, Anadil thinks to the voice in her head, gazing at the girl she loves. And like it was never there at all, the voice that called her a coward, the voice that said she could never love, the voice that brought her deepest fears and insecurities to life, is gone.

And all that’s left is Hester.

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tellywoodtrash · 4 years

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immj2 09.10.20 lb

lol, lemme preface this by telling you what i know about the show from my out-of-context insta-viewing:

kabir sends his gf riddhima in to spy on vansh RAISINGHANIA (naam ka wazan check karein ji. kaafi hi bhaari-bharkam, just like the fake baritone the actor playing the character is being forced to put on.) vansh is some kinda shady, but idk WHAT SPECIFIC KIND of shady..... like is he just your garden-variety-evil-capitalist-ala-ambani-bezos, or is he into shit like drug smuggling and human/organ trafficking???? no one knows. maybe a little bit of both. but kabir’s a COP, and we all know that those fuckers are the shadiest shits around (#ACAB) so yeah, true to type, kabir shadyyyyyyyy. he’s actually the secret illegitimate son of vansh’s stepmom and together they wanna ruin vansh and take all his monies. so anyway, kabir sends in riddhima, who’s just a whole special brand of dumbass, but also extraordinarily determined in the way only tellywood heroines are. so she’s basically sticking her nose everywhere that doesn’t belong and being a pain in the ass of literally everyone in the show, including her own (coz she seems to get injured in novel and entertaining ways in every second episode.) kabir ultimately manipulates her into marrying vansh, while vansh has apparently married her KNOWING that she’s a spy and is probably playing the long game to see who her puppet-master is. long story short, heterosexuality is too potent a force and the Stupid Spy Girl and Gangsta Guy are currently slowly giving in to the Feelz™, despite missing that one-little-teensy-weensy-who-even-needs-it-in-a-real-relationship thing. y’know, that little thing called, idk, i think it’s called “TRUST” or some such strange unheard-of concept.

oh, in between all this there’s also some bizarre plot about some ex of vansh’s called ragini, who’s dead??? missing? idk. kabir is real interested in that and wants to jail vansh for it, but we’ve long forgotten about ragini by this point #RIPSis anyway, there’s some kinda statue of her’s in the attic or some shit, coz vansh is some kinda modern day gender-reversed medusa who turns women who cross him into statues??? idk man, idk. so riddhima is pretty much in constant danger of being statue-d.

also vansh has a requisite irritating famiy in tow, that he’s burdened with being in charge of (coz no rest for the unfortunate eldest son who lives in this godforksaken mansion, be that an oberoi or a raisinghania) feat: a dadi who is well-meaning, but as annoying as the one in IB was, constantly spouting platitudes about how vansh and Spy Girl trooooooly lurrrrrrrrrrve each other *kissy noises*; some chachi/chacha who are all “HEY WHY DOES HE GET TO BE THE BOSS, WE WANT CONTROL OF THE CRORE-ON KA BIJNESS TOO”, some very fake kanji-eyed siblings/cousins who are supreme bitches, and ofc one (1) normal sibling who is sweet but really does nothing around here. oh and there’s his right hand man/bff too, who seems to be not 100% (maybe just 83%?) incompetent like everyone else. that poor sod just got suckered into marrying Kanji Aankhon Waali Bitch Sister, who is pregnant with some total rando’s baby, and is just an all-round asshole to Riddhima/Right Hand Man, because “ugh, yeh do kaudi ke middle class naukar log, cheeeeee.”

ok now that the sasta, not-at-all-useful recap has been done, LET’S GET INTO THISSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

———————————————————————

the chachi is screaming her goddamn headdddd off coz her room is on fire. ofc it is. when has anything good ever happened in this manhoos house of horrors.

lmao the kanji eyed cousin has like 3% concern that his mom will be fried like a taaza jalebi. he's literally sauntering luxuriously towards his mom's room jaise park mein tehel raha ho.

chachi's screaming is getting on my nerves. aunty you're wasting valuable oxygen this way.

riddhima is behind some secret box that aryan and chachi stashed in the room.

THESE PPL ARE SO CHILL ABOUT A WHOLE ROOM ON FIRE (note: it’s shivaay's room in IB) and they're just hanging out in the living room (which if you’ll remember, IS ATTACHED TO THE ROOM THAT WAS SHIVAAY’S) as if fire doesnt have a tendency to y'know.......... SPREAD RAPIDLY.

riddhima is fighting with the bloody fireman saying ki i need to save the box. #priorities

aaaaaaand the fireman is kabir, who has come to haath maarofy on Box of Secrets.

and we know this coz he did a DRAMAAAAAAAAATIC reveal by taking off his mask. in a room FULLY ON FIRE. idhar non-flaming rooms mein bhi ab mask nikaalna danger ho gaya hai, and this guy justtttttttttt dgaf. tum jaison ki wajaah se hi we can't bloody stop the spread.

my god this house has been decorated soooooooo fucking tackily. never thought the oberois would be the classy ones.

shady saasumaa and riddhima stinkeye-ing each other over a bowl of shehed. lol, what even. truly some "rasode mein kaun tha" lvl of politics.

oh ho, saasumaa and kabir lagaaofied the aag.

saasumaa gloating over the fact that riddhima will now never get her hands on Box of Secrets.

flashback time: hahahahaha KABIR LITERALLY LOBBED A MOLOTOV COCKTAIL INTO THE ROOM AND CHACHI DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING HEAR IT OR ANYTHING. lmao everyone in this show is a dumbass. how blissful life must be with just one (1) working brain cell.

riddhima runs into flaming room. ofc now we will have a prolonged sequence where kabir tries to keep his identity and riddhima being the dheent that she is, will give chase.

please note, that not even 48 hours ago, this woman walked barefoot on a bed of coals AND a hallway full of broken glass. AND NOW SHE'S RUNNING FULL SPEED BEHIND KABIR AS IF SHE’S PT USHA. SIS, TUMHARE PAIR HAIN KI KYA HAIN? YOU'RE LONG OVERDUE FOR AN INTENSE PEDICURE AFTER THIS WEEK.

and ofc, he got into a getaway car and made it away.

yeh lo, iss beech mein dadi behosh. ouff.

whooooooooops, dadi has some weird blue nishaan on her neck.

LMAO KABIR SHOT AT RIDDHIMA WITH A POISON BULLET OR SYRINGE OR SOME SHIT, WHICH HIT DADI INSTEAD. LMAO MAN THIS SHOW. IT'S SO FUCKING DUMB, I LOVE IT.

some more stinkeye politics between saas bahu.

bahu is passive-aggressively giving saasumaa roses to congratulate her on winning this round.

riddhima is dheent!max. she's like kuch bhi ho, i'll find the secret anyway and your victory will witherrrrrrr awayyyyyyyy like these flowerssssss and you will be left with the thorns that will prick youuuuuuuu!!!!!!!

LMAO SAAS IS FULLY ROLLING HER EYES AT RIDDHIMA'S DRAMATIC ASS #SAME

just looking at helly's ears is making my ears hurt like a bitch.

hey riddhima, have you ever thought that maybe this secret child of hers is NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS?????? like honestly, the entitlement desis have to know the workings of other ppl’s wombs.

lol dumbass mummyji crumpled the flowers in her hand and played right into riddhima's stupid kaante waala metaphor. #ramMilayiJodi

hero ko covid hai toh ainvayi ke phone calls se kaam chalaana pad raha hai.

the dude left his house for literally the first time in months and the place is on fire and dadi got shot in the neck with poison. and the wife doesn't think she should tell him so that he doesn't become "pareshaan". sure, this seems like a dude who'll take this kinda thing real light when he finds out later.

(hint: he’s not. he’s a crazed, overprotective weirdo about his family. sound familiar?????)

this guy's dialogue delivery is so dodgy. idk what it is, it just seems so affected.

that plus the ainvayi ka editing just showing him in some random car (clearly from the earlier eps) is just adding to the jankiness of the scene.

husband dude seems to know wifey's quirks quite well. kinda cute, kinda creepy.

lol kal tak toh yeh banda itna romantic nahi tha. like he had a smooth moment here and there, but he was mostly real awkward and robotic and unsure how to handle These Strange New Feelings™. now he’s spouting cheesyass lines about being able to see the one who is special to you with dil ki aankhein and idk what.

who are these people who like SHARING their room with another person? #unrealistic

but i also i get you, riddhima. he was pretty much the only thing worth looking at in this room, coz the rest of it is so damn fugggggg. this room should be the one set on fire.

dang, some steamy scenes between them in the flashbacks. ouff abhi jaake episodes dhundne padenge. coz #tharkiTTisTharki

riddhima doing dadi seva. boooooooooring.

ofc dadi ki sui is always atkofied on playing cupid for pota, taaki she can score some par-pota/potis.

riddhima ki best friend ka happy birthday hai.

riddhima is like a lottttt has happened in my life, can't really tell you over a call. yup, that’s for sure.

ok apparently sejal who said she’s in dubai now is NOT in dubai?? she's just up and flew to mumbai to "surprise" riddhima...... on HER OWN birthday? #doesNotCompute

lmao kabir's annoyance with mummy's useless glass of water. WHY DO MOMS THINK EVERYTHING CAN BE SOLVED WITH DRINKING MORE WATER?!?!?!!

now he's yelling at mom about how she's ruined everything. sure. blame the only one who's actually doing shit around here, while you sit on your ass in this room, glaring and growling like a hangry bear.

some menacing dialogue about how he needs to thikaane lagaaofy riddhima's hosh.

which has been overheard by bff sejal, who went and dropped a showpiece from shock. cool. so she gonna die. bye sejal, hardly got to know ya!

sejal being here doesn’t even make sense. she thought he was a PT teacher. then why did she show up here at his police waala office? also how did she connect the dots about the whole damn story with like 0.04% context that she got from what she overheard? kuchhhhhhh bhi.

#ishq mein marjawan 2 #immj2 #immj2 lbs #episode liveblogs

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lunchador · 4 years

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I am trying to be normal levels of excited right now bc I had no idea you were so far in DA:O (i forget tumblr exists oops) so now I'm just!!! 8)))))) so thrilled you liked it I wanna know everything & I'm definitely gonna finish scrolling through what you already posted but!!! i wanna ask about your ending i Do Not See It anywhere and I'm curious wrt loghain & hazel (please tell me she survived 😭😭)

Bro, some shit happened.

While I’m pretty sure no one is like “Wow Raspa really had spiraled down into DA, I’m now interested in playing”, spoilers I guess??

SO MANY CHOICES AT THE END OF THE GAME

Let me tell you, I had a plan.

The second I learned of Alistair being bastard son of a King and had the potential to be the next one, I knew in my heart, we had to break up for PLOT reasons. I knew he’d be a genuine one, and while my characters backstory was she was eager to be in a position of leadership back when she was daughter of an Arl, she realized she liked being a soldier on the road helping people so she definitely would not want to be Queen, she’s never been elegant and did not want the attention.

So we get to the awkward moment I knew was coming. I convinced Anora to enter a political marriage with my boyfriend. Awkward. I talk Alistair into it, he breaks up with me. Ouch.

LOGHAIN. Man, I said FUCK THAT GUY. He ain’t my homie. I’ve grown very proud to be a grey warden and fuck him for trying to taint them. So, I beheaded him. In retrospect, pretty shitty for your future husband/kings current girlfriend to kill your dad after she just asked you to go into this political tie to keep your royal status idk. Maybe it would have been more just to make Loghain be someone who serves for the greater good after everything he pulled.

Riordan drops the bomb that a grey warden has to kill the Archdemon and that grey warden has to die. GREAT. I decide, He offers himself to do it after I state i will sacrifice myself and I go ok I guess he has a point he’s much older and doesn’t have much longer.

Morrigan puts her offer on the table. She needs Alistair to dump a creampie in her. Awkward cuz I didn’t work on her relationship enough (idk she hated me) so I’m like, ah, you want me to ask my boyfriend who you hate and who hates you to fuck you? I tell myself I can’t do it, not because I’m jealous and the only girl for him, but because I just bullied him into a marriage and now I’m gonna push him to have sex with a woman he despises on my behalf? Literally what the fuck from his perspective. My friends chewed me out for this, said I should have let Alistair “give her that soup can dick”. Alistair’s soupcan dick is now a reoccuring joke.

Riordan dies. Just fuckin dropped by the Archdemon. Did I fuck up or does that happen regardless?

So there goes plan A. And I’m thinking, fuck it, I had a good run. We are going to pull some Fallout 3 ending bullshit. I will die to save everyone

E X C E P T

Alistair, who JUST dumped me mind you, tells me he’s not going to let me sacrifice myself, not while he has the opportunity to stop it, cuz the stupid bitch loves me.

I watch in fucking horror as my video game boyfriend, the only person Hazel has ever had feelings for, leaps up and sacrifices himself, mostly on my behalf, because this fucker who wanted nothing more in his life was to have a family who loves him, and he said he wasn’t ready to be king, so instead he’s throwing it all away to protect the one person he’s loved.

So, true to me as a person and my usual experience in video games, I royally fucked up.

So yeah, Hazel survives. But, it sucks.

The canon ending I got: Alistair died on my behalf, Hazel continues on with the grey wardens with Zevran and Oghren on her side. The canon ending I wanted: Alistair Marries Anora and every meeting between future King Alistair and little ol’ Hazel are painful as hell full of yearning and full of what ifs til the end of their days. The ending I heavily considered: Alistair becoming king and Hazel being his consensual side piece. But Anora mentioned yet another husband who had other women behind her back and i felt guilty.

The ways I fucked up: Didn’t ‘harden’ Alistair, whatever the fuck that means. I should have recruited Loghain and used him as the sacrifice. Got Riordan killed? Again, not sure if that’s automatic or me. I guess I could have let Alistair do cummies inside Morrigan but GOD would he be fine knowing he has a bastard son whos a fucking hellspawn, literally?????? oh my god.

I am very pleased with the overall lore and writing of this game and how decisions genuinely feel like they’ve got weight. I do wish I took more time with the game (i didn’t get to do several companion quests and i wanna know more lore).

Also I didn’t save I guess?? At the end of the game? Idk, it only showed me my save from before the archdemon battle and wouldn’t let me load my Origins file onto 2. So HAHA BITCH, ALISTAIR LIVES. My friends are ripping on me to go with Alistair being dead because the fun of all 3 games is having your decisions cross over but FUCK THAT.

#wow this ended up being a lot #but at the same time #its literally just covering like 3 decisions LMFAO #and this is the condensed version #i am super sorry to anyone who follows me here #and my personal twit #where i've been splitting all my shitposting #dragon age #hazel

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johnshelbysbabygirll · 5 years

Text

Russian Roulette I - JOHN SHELBY X READER

Words: 2361

Warnings: a lot of cursing, drugs, a little smut maybe idk

hello my loves!!

there is another imagine and this one it’s probably my favorite i’ve ever wrote bcs i’m a sucker for drama and angry John

and also for the same reason, there is a part II with smut and i’ll post it soon.

thank you and love you xx

"I can't believe I agreed with this fuckin stupid idea" John muttered again and you rolled your eyes in anger, looking on the window so you don't have to look at him.

"Would you shut the fuck up already, Johnny boy? You are bloody annoying." Arthur speaks loudly from the front seat, doing some lines and being annoyed at Tommy's driving.

He was true, John was a pain in your ass. You are in a car ride with them to the Russians house and it was the most awful car ride you ever had. You can cut the tension with a fucking knife. All of this only because you came with them at the party the Russians are organized tonight. Right, it was Polly's idea because she couldn’t make it, but then you became really excited about it and really wanted to. Thomas was unsure at first, but now he looked really fine with it, knowing it will be just a crazy party. On the other hand, John was a bomb who can explode anytime.

"Yeah, it will be fine." Tommy said and he was in a really good mood; grinning when he got into a hole, the snow almost spilling on Arthur's pants as he cursed his brother.

"Fuck off. All of you." He speaks again and you couldn't help it.

"You fuck off, John. What the fuck are you hiding? Why are you so angry with me being there?"

His glare could burn your skin to bone. Same as yours.

"This will be bloody fun" Arthur muttered to himself as he snorted all the line.

Half hour later you finally arrived, but they stopped you from getting out of the car. Again, Arthur was doing lines and he raised his eyebrows at you in the mirror, you nodded and you lifted up from the backseat, snorting a little. John sniffed and he lights up a cigar; he didn't told you a single word all the road and this upset you, that's why you accepted Arthur's offer.

"Okay [Y/N], I feel like if I'm not tellin you this again, John would shut me in my fuckin eyes, so listen. They will have girls, so you.."

"What about you, Tom?" Arthur smirked.

"Unfortunately, I have Tatiana."

"She's something else" John chuckled and Arthur did the same, as you and Tommy rolls your eyes. You did that the whole fucking time, but it was his fault. You don't wanna be jealous, what the hell that means?

"Yes, she's out of her bloody mind. Anyway, as I was saying, [Y/N] you are not..."

"I'm his whore, I know. And I won't say a single word." You repeated the things you've been hearing for two days straight and John glared at you.

"Good."

You all get out of the car and took a look at the big house in front of you.

"Remember lads, they are fucking insane. Fuck them."

You didn't believed back then. But now, you truly did.

The living room and the party was a orgy in it truest form and you never saw something like this before. Men kissing and pleasing other men, women tasting each other and others fucking right there without a shame. You wanted so bad to avoid seeing another man's cock, but it was hard and John looked at you; this time his face alarmed for a bit as he wanted so bad to protect your innocence, yet he was still mad and he can't show affection to his "whore". The music was so loud as Thomas was talking to the Russians, so John took the chance to talk into your ear, slowly touching your ass for the public.

"If something happens to you, I will lose my shit, so you better..."

"It won't."

He nodded and Thomas guided you all to a office you guessed. There was two other curvy and almost naked women, probably for Arthur. Leon, as the boys called him, looked at Arthur, then at John, but his eyes slowly faded on you.

"This one was for you, John." He speaks with a strong accent and you tried your best not to frown. John grinned at her, but then he smacked your ass hard so everyone saw it and for the show, you bit on your lower lip while looking at him.

"Thank you, but this one is fo’ me. She's the best in Small Heath."

"And you couldn't leave her back at home, ey?"

"She can't resist without my filling her."

The Romanov family are laughing and Thomas and Arthur did the same, but they looked concerned about your reaction. You just looked at John like you wanted to fuck him right there. Even if you just wanted to rip his head off. Both of them. You know that this is his revenge for you wanting to come here, but you're not going to fed up.

"So women you are both mine tonight" Arthur smirked as he made himself comfortable on the sofa with both women on his each side, making him relax a little.

Tommy sat with Tatiana in his lap on another lounge, Leon on the chair behind his desk. John lays down on another lounge and you comfy sat on his lap; he puffed on his cigar as you are watching him in awe. Him not sure if you are truly or just playing your role. He wink at you and he let out all the smoke in your face, making you grin a little.

Soon they started talking business and you started talking with a lower voice with Tatiana, Isabella and the other two women. Tatiana doesn't seem so bad, she was quite funny actually, but you started to get bored soon. Also a bit tipsy, just like everyone else. They don't drink that much whisky or rum, they drink vodka and that's what you also drink tonight. Arthur is drunk as hell already and he is kissing with both women, Tommy started to kiss Tatiana a little too passionate for the public and John...Well, his hand was resting for a while on your leg under your dress, but now he was playing with his fingers on your stomach area. You started to feel hot and you heavy breathed, just like he did watching you on his lap, almost straddling him.

"I want to fuck you so bad" he speaks with a not so low tone, but no one payed attention anyway. "You are beautiful."

You wanted to kiss him, but you are not sure if that's alright, so you let him do it when he feel it to.

"You are not mad at me anymore?"

"Oh, I am. And ya will get your punishment for that."

He pressed his lips on yours, his tongue quickly dominate yours. It was a rough and desperate kiss and you feel it right between your legs; your clit pulsing in lust. Unfortunately, John was pulled into another boring conversation about extending the business and drink a few more glasses of vodka in the meantime, just like you did but stopped when you reached your limit.

"I'm bored" Tatiana said as she finished her cigarette and she stands up quickly, lifting her dress up a little as she pulled out a revolver. "Let's play."

A devilish smirk was on her face as she checked the bullets; she keep one bullet in while the others falls on the floor.

"Play what?" You asked and you regret it immediately. Speak before you think.

"You'll see, doll." Thomas pulled her back into the lounge, but he couldn't control her. Leon watched careful what happened in front of his eyes.

"She's not playing. She's here to give me attention and pleasure, not to play a bloody game."

"Oh, John." She smiled at him, up on her feet again. "You all gonna be playing."

You heard Thomas cursing under his breath and everyone moved at the table, you still not knowing what his happening. John was tensed and he tightly grabbed your thigh before you two stand up and moved on the chairs.

"What the fuck is happenin'?" Arthur asked in a clearly drunken voice, with his up buttons ripped off, revealing his chest. Just like you weakened John's tie an hour ago.

"It's a stupid idea, Tatiana." Thomas said as he lights up a cigarette, Leon grinned.

"The night was quite boring actually. So...Why not?"

"Why not?" John raised an eyebrow, you confused between him and Arthur with his bitches still kissing his neck and chest. John clenched his jaw and shot down his glass of vodka. Thomas took him a glare, telling him to shut up.

"Yeah, why not?" Arthur talked again and you are a little concerned right now.

"I'm starting" Tatiana said and she lifted the gun to her temple with a big grin on her face.

John cursed under his breath again and he grabbed your hand under the table, but it didn't feel like an affection gesture, more like he was trying to make you watchful. But you already are, guessing what could happen next.

Tatiana pulled the trigger and you almost screamed under the music from the living room, scared as fuck, but nothing happened.

"Exciting as always" she says and she lights up another cigarette, watching now everyone from her chair. You can't help, but wonder how many times she played this game before and won every damn time.

"Russian roulette, it's been a while." Arthur speaks but he didn't seem too impressed, more concerned about the empty vodka bottle. The maid quickly replacing it with another one.

Thomas was next and he just finished his cigarette as he took the gun from Tatiana, he don't look happy at all. Neither scared. You can feel John tensed body next to you as he looked at his brothers, eye talking with them, Thomas mostly. He wasn't scared of his turn, he was scared of yours and the fact that you were before him. You, the woman he loves, can die right in front of his eyes because of a stupid fuckin game and he has to be not too interested about it since you are just a whore in front of the Russians. John and his brothers decided that it's better this way, if they will become enemies, they won't know John's weak spot that is clearly you. He hated himself for brought you here, in the middle of dangerous and crazy people. He knew right from the start that this it's a bad idea.

Thomas pulled the trigger and your heart skipped a beat, but nothing happened. He looked at you, his eyes full of concern, but you smiled a little to tell him that you are fine, but you are not.

It was Arthur's turn. You only hear the music from the living room, sometimes the moans and until now the giggles that came from Arthur's women, but right now they shouted it down because it is his turn.

It was a painful thing to watch your brothers in law with a gun at their heads; in fact, you see them as your brothers and you love them as much.

"I knew it from the first...I knew it was a fuckin bad idea, [Y/N]." John whispered in your hair; he made a pause, licking his lips then he continued. "You're fuckin stubbornness it's going to kill you tonight."

You didn't have the time to react cause Arthur pulled the trigger. You were glad nothing happened, but now it was your turn and you and John's hearts are beating so loud, that you think that the others can see it in your chests.

"Come on, doll. You can do it." Tatiana said with a smirk and Arthur gave you the gun, not wanting to. He looked at you with big eyes and even in his drunk state, he realized what would mean for his brother if his woman would die. He wanted to say something, but he couldn't, just as Tommy. All eyes are on you.

You took a gun in your hand for the first time ever and it also may be the one that kills you.

Under the table, you grabbed John's hand with yours and you looked right into his eyes for a short moment. Your eyes say "i love you" and you try your best to hide your terrified face, but you don't know if you can.

John whispered back, closing his eyes in pain of regret. It didn't happen, but he already regret accepting it.

You slowly closed your eyes like the others did, but your hand is shaking on the gun. You took a gasp of air cause it may be your last and you thought at John and at his beautiful deep blue eyes, that always melts you on your feet.

And you pulled the trigger.

The time froze and you can't realized what happened in just one second.

Right after you pulled the trigger, John couldn't accept it and lifted up from his chair, throwing it away as he hit your hand. The bullet stopped into the wall when it should be in your head. The realization made your body shacking and you can feel the tears in your eyes as you try your best to keep your calm in front of the Russians.

Thomas and Arthur exhaled the air they kept in and John did the same so loudly that everyone in the room looked at him. Tatiana and Leon were confused, but they didn't say anything at all about this.

John shot it down another full glass of vodka to calm him down and kissed your hand under the table, whispering with his lips pressing against your smooth skin.

"You are gonna be so fuckin punished for this."

He bit hard on your skin and you bit on your lower lip at his words; excited, yet a little bit scared.

#john shelby imagines #john shelby #john x reader #peaky blinders #peaky fookin blinders #peaky blinders imagines #thomasshelby #arthurshelby

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