#And not as annoying as some I've heard on other promotions

[at0michips]

interviews and intimacy — mike faist

summary: the press tour of challengers was coming to an end, and even though Mike liked promoting his new movie all around the world, he was tired and even annoyed of the same old questions, so it did surprise him when a younger woman changed the pattern.

author note: just wanted to say that this is based off my deepest thoughts and hallucinations that this is going to happen to me someday and I just really needed to elaborate it further than in my brain. I have a lot more like this to work on so maybe it becomes a sort of series, who knows!! feel free to request

It was a full day, Mike has been patient and tried to be as social as possible with the press but he couldn't help the bad mood that came with those clueless questions that could totally put him and his coworkers in an uncomfortable situation, especially with both of them openly having a significant other. So when he heard that this would be the last interview of the press he felt relieved, he could go straight back into his house in New York, spend some days in there and go back to Ohio so he could see his family for a bit and then see what was his next step.

Everything seemed like it was going to work out nicely, and then it didn't looked like it anymore. After the new interview crew arrived he could hear some whispering between them.

"W-why does it have to be me?" one of the girls said a little loud only to be shushed by an older woman who was attaching a mic in her clothing

"Because you have a degree, because you have been helping Rose write the last interviews questions, because you're good!" she answered "Calm down, they're just people, ok? I spoke to her on the phone and she promised to pay you dinner next friday, keep that in mind." and then it hit him, that a girl who looked barely out of college was about to lead this interview.

The studio buzzed with the controlled chaos of a film set winding down for the day. Mike Faist sat across from you, a young journalist who had been unexpectedly thrust into the role of interviewer. Initially skeptical of her ability to handle the job, Mike found himself pleasantly surprised as the interview progressed.

"You know, for someone who's filling in last minute, you're doing pretty damn well," Mike remarked, a hint of admiration in his voice.

You felt your shoulders relax a fraction, the tension from earlier slowly dissipating. "Thank you. I'm glad I could hold my own."

Mike nodded thoughtfully, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "More than holding your own, actually. You're asking some really insightful questions."

You couldn't help but smile back, a mixture of relief and pride washing over her. "I've been a writer for a while, just not usually about movies."

"Well, maybe you've found a new calling," he teased lightly, his gaze lingering on her face. "You've definitely got a knack for it."

You felt a warmth spread through your chest at his compliment. "I think I'll stick to writing," you replied, matching his playful tone. "But who knows? Maybe I'll make an exception."

Mike leaned in a bit closer, the studio lights casting a soft glow around the both of you. "I hope you do," he said sincerely. "Because I'd really like to see you again. Maybe over a drink, not in a studio."

You could feel your heart skip a beat at the invitation. "I'd like that too."

As they exchanged smiles, the noise of the studio faded into the background, leaving only the promise of a new connection blossoming between them.

The bar was buzzing with soft chatter and the clinking of glasses, casting a warm glow over you and Mike as you sat across from each other. After the earlier meeting for the interview, something had shifted, probably the intimate ambiance of the place helped it too.

"So, what's it really like being on stage every night?" you asked, with the voice laced with genuine curiosity.

Mike leaned forward, his eyes sparkling as he recounted stories from his time on Broadway. His passion for his craft was evident, and you found yourself captivated not just by his words but by the sincerity in his gaze.

As the evening wore on, the conversation flowed effortlessly, weaving between laughter and moments of shared insight. Mike found himself drawn to your intelligence and wit, and he couldn't shake the feeling that there was something special about you.

The drinks arrived, and Mike hesitated for a moment before reaching out to lightly touch your hand. You looked up, meeting his gaze with a hint of surprise that quickly melted into a warm smile.

"I'm really glad we could do this," Mike admitted, his voice soft but earnest.

You could feel your heart skip a beat. "Me too," you replied, the voice tinged with a mix of excitement and nervousness.

In that moment, the air between you both seemed to crackle with unspoken tension. Without another word, Mike leaned in, closing the gap remaining between the two of you. Your lips met in a gentle, tentative kiss that spoke volumes of the attraction simmering beneath the surface.

It was a kiss filled with promise, a silent agreement of mutual interest and the beginning of something new.

The world around you seemed to fade away as they kissed, your hand finding its way to Mike's cheek as if to anchor yourself in the moment. Mike's heart raced, his mind momentarily forgetting the crowded bar and focusing solely on the warmth of your lips against his.

When you finally pulled back, your breaths mingling in the space between them, Mike searched for your eyes, his own filled with a mixture of wonder and longing.

"Wow," you whispered, your voice barely audible above the soft background music.

"Yeah," Mike murmured, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "That was... unexpected."

You chuckled nervously, feeling a warmth spread around your face. "Unexpected, but definitely not unwelcome."

You sat in comfortable silence for a moment, basking in the afterglow of their kiss. The tension that had built up between you and Mike earlier seemed to dissipate, replaced now by a quiet understanding.

"I should probably walk you home," Mike suggested softly, his thumb gently tracing circles on the back of your hand.

You nodded, a small smile playing on your lips. "I'd like that."

As you guys left the bar and stepped out into the cool night air, Mike offered you his arm, and you gladly linked hers through his. You walked side by side, with the shoulders brushing occasionally, each lost in their own thoughts yet connected by the spark that had ignited that evening.

[kjupchurch-xx]

The Fight - WattPad Request

I sighed as I ran my fingers through my hair. Hugh and I had been together for one year, but the year hadn't been the easiest. I was not used to stardom or used to being with someone that was an actor. While I could understand the flirting and intimacy while filming a movie, I didn't understand or appreciate the flirting during interviews. It was unnecessary.

Hugh sighed, "You know I'm just playing the part, babe." He said as he sat down on the couch, beside me.

He shifted on the couch, "Why do you do this?" He asked sincerely.

I looked over at him, giving him a side eye, "Why do I do what?" I asked him sarcastically.

He wasn't going to spin this around on me. I've sat through fan girls gawking over him, I've sat through men gawking over him, I've sat through his films watching the sex scenes or the kissing scenes. Interviews were where I drew the line.

He raised his voice, clearly becoming annoyed, "Do shit like this, Kaitlyn! You know I'm promoting a film. I'm not sleeping with my bloody interviewers!" He said as he threw his hands up in defeat.

I took a deep breath, "So what's the deal with the girl telling you she feels as if you're unreachable and asking if she can sit on your fucking lap?!" I asking impatiently, raising my voice with the last sentence.

He shrugged, "I don't know. I was just playing along with it." He said bluntly, looking at me with an irritated expression.

I quickly jumped off the couch and looked down at him, "Playing the part? So was playing the part fucking kissing her and 'taking her as your Nicole'?!"

This interviewer was an attractive foreign girl dressed as a cheap flight attendant, who had interviewed Hugh for his Wolverine Origins movie. Hugh knew she'd crossed a line in the interview and knew I'd be livid after seeing it. This was different from the other interviews. With Allison, she's a friend of mine and Hugh's. I know she genuinely means no harm and is only being funny and flirty for her viewers, and even though she is a beautiful woman, I know Hugh would not be sexually interested in her.

I trust Hugh, but I don't trust the slutty women that throw themselves all over him during an interview. But the problem is whenever you've been apart for quite some time for filming and now some slutty ass bitch is practically throwing her soaking wet vagina at your man, and he knows he could take it if he wanted to.

He sighed loudly, running his fingers through us hair. "Look, I know I fucked up. I'm sorry. The interview was disrespectful to you and I'm sorry. I don't know what else you want me to say."

I chuckled dryly as I rolled my eyes, "I guess you'll just have to figure that one out for yourself." I said bluntly as I walked into the bedroom, flinging myself on the bed.

I didn't want to be mad at Hugh, I love him with all my heart, but the thought of that girl telling him to move things to his bedroom, seeing him kiss her twice while also joking about how his bedroom had a nice view, really rubbed me the wrong way and if I'm being honest, disgusted me beyond belief.

I heard him frustratedly say, "Goddamit." From the other room, but chose to ignore it. He knew my past and how every man I'd ever been with had cheated or used me for their own pleasure. He knew that there were still things that triggered me, yet chose to feed into her bullshit on camera. It almost felt like the way he was looking at her, was the same way he looked at me.

I felt a stray tear begin to fall down my cheek. I sniffled, quickly wiping it away but more began to fall. I hugged the pillow beside me and cried into it. Seeing him kiss her was the worst part. Joking about his bedroom being something she'd enjoy hurt me to my core, regardless of if he were joking or not. He's a jealous person, and I know if the roles were reversed, he'd be just as upset, and he knows he would.

I heard footsteps coming towards the bed, looking to see him peering down at me.

“Baby.” He said softly, as he realized I was crying.

I sighed, quickly trying to wipe the tears away as he sat beside me on our bed.

“Baby, I’m sorry. I know the interview went too far.” He said, his voice gentle.

I looked up at him, not wanting to talk. I couldn’t figure out what to say without wanting to continue to lash out.

He began caressing my arm, “I love you. I never want you to feel like there’s anyone else I want or would be with romantically or intimately.” He said softly as I turned to face him.

I ran my hand over my nose, sniffling. “It’s hard to not feel that way whenever you do interviews and act the way you do.” I said as my voice cracked.

He sighed deeply as he laid beside me, pulling me into his chest. “I know. I wasn’t thinking about it. I was just trying to promote the film and finish the interview as quickly as possible.”

I took a deep breath, inhaling sharply. “I don’t want you to not be yourself during interviews or to avoid playing around because of me. I’m not threatened by your interviews with Allison whatsoever, but the way this bitch was acting towards you makes me want to claw her fucking eyes out.”

He chuckled softly, “You have nothing to worry about, babe. You make me so incredibly happy. There’s no other woman on this planet that I’d want to spend the rest of my life. Regardless of how mad she is over me.” He said as he wrapped his arms tightly around me, kissing my head.

I smiled as I traced patterns on the fabric of his shirt that was covering his chest.

He caressed my back as he spoke, “I promise I’ll tone the interviews down, okay?”

I chuckled, “You don’t have to do that, baby… just… if they try to throw their vaginas at you, just… fuck, I don’t know.” I laughed. “Tell them your girlfriend will literally smash their face into the sidewalk.”

He laughed as he nodded, “You’re something else…” he said through his laughter. “I love you.”

I smiled, lifting my head to kiss him, “I love you more.”

[devsgames]

"Is Tumblr Blaze Worth It For Promoting My Indie Game?" - a Postmortem

Lately I've been thinking about marketing and promotion of my games and wanting to explore new avenues. Tumblr Blaze was one of those things I wanted to dip my toes into a bit to understand how it works and if it has potential for advertising my sort of stuff. Like as not, there's no point in making games if nobody actually plays them after all!

Conversely I have also heard bad things about Tumblr Blaze; that it's not very targeted, the reach is fairly limited, and people on this site generally hate anything that is Blazed to them.

I wanted to test all these waters a bit to see if it's something worth investing in, and share what I found for my own benefit and the benefit of others. Finding various info on topics like this for indie dev can be a pain, so why not share my findings?

The Plan and Goal

While Centauri Dark is still in development and is the thing I actually want to advertise more of right now, Bombing!! 2 is already out and is much more marketable with some cool art made by community members. I think as a first impression it tends to show well, so I decided to make my test post with that to get exposure to it and see how it goes.

My goal was mostly to see what a Blaze post does for advertising a launched indie game and how much "eyes on" it actually gets in terms of actual engagement.

Posting

From the outset I knew I wanted to make a post that 1) wasn't annoying to people just looking at the webbed site 2) featured a call to action of some kind I could measure 3) wouldn't break the bank.

Here's what I came up with:

The intention was to flash some cool looking art to grab their attention, explain what they're looking at, and then link the game a couple of times while mentioning "Buy or Wishlist" for good measure as a call to action.

Since Bombing!! 2 is such an art-forward game, I found the coolest art pieces made by community members that felt the most "Tumblr" to match the audience, and would also show off the range of art you could make in the game. I also wanted to make it personal, like me writing a message to whoever would read it instead of something that sounded like a standard ad. Generally I think it was a fairly reasonable little post that catches some interest and doesn't overstay too much of a welcome. What I think also helps is it's explicitly a "hey this might interest you" sort of framing (as opposed to a more "why am I even seeing this" sort of post you tend to get from Blaze sometimes).

I also think it's worth emphasizing that writing a posted explicitly intending to be Blazed was a much stronger approach than just Blazing some random post I had made for my own followers months ago, because I could align it to my promotional goals. It also assumed that random people on the Internet would be the ones seeing my post, and not the followers and friends who already know me and my work.

Blazing

As I looked into Blaze early on there was actually a few key things I wasn't fully aware of about the system.

It guarantees a minimum amount of views

It guarantees it will be Blazed for a minimum of 24 hours no matter how many views

You pay a single base rate for the whole campaign (great compared to some ads which tend to price based on views/engagement).

You can define an audience explicitly (some info that was floating around lead me to believe this wasn't the case).

Campaigns come in a few amounts:

I paid for the 2nd tier; $17 USD for a campaign, which amounts to $25 CDN. I wanted to go a little more into it than the lowest tier offered, since I figured the lowest wouldn't give me as much data as I would've liked and I wanted to know what to reasonably expect should I decide to do it again in the future.

Since Bombing!! 2 sells for ~$20USD I also figure if the Blaze campaign prompts at least two people to buy the game then the Blaze would have paid for itself.

Blaze lets you use tags to define which audiences you want to reach. Unfortunately it doesn't let you view that data after you've applied it, but the tags I chose were generally anyone who spoke English and has an interest in Digital Artist or Video Game circles.

The campaign ran for 24 Hours, starting yesterday and ending today.

The Results

I definitely noticed a sharp uptick in engagement during the campaign! It hit the target audience of ~7k around one hour into the campaign, after which point I noticed engagement take a sharp decline.

Here's the Blaze campaign analytics provided by Tumblr (which was also very helpful to have):

So it seems ~12.5k views from Blaze, ~370 likes, ~80 reblogs, 5 shares elsewhere. The post itself has ~520 notes, so I assume there's some reblogging and liking happening from beyond the Blaze campaign that isn't pictured here. The good thing is that despite having reached its 7k target after only 1 hour, it continued to circulate and be Blazed until 24 hours later. Eventually the post made it to ~12k views overall, which was nearly double the amount promised by the campaign - I attribute this mostly to a strong post/target audience/subject matter and I'm sure it's not standard.

Here's the general velocity of engagement around when the post was Blazed:

It jumped much more than I honestly expected, but you can tell Blaze seemed to put it in front of people's faces more than my regular posts do. You can see it drops off sharply as I hit the quoted amount as well, back down to the normal amount of engagement I get on Tumblr.

But this stuff isn't really what I was looking for; I was looking for sales and keeping an eye on 'conversions' - or how many users followed my call to action because of the post. Likes and stuff are fine and cool, but how many people bought or wishlisted the game on Steam as a result of seeing the post on Tumblr?

Tumblr and Blaze obviously have no way of telling me this, so I'm looking to Steam to show me changes there.

Here's what Steam shows me happened to the Bombing!! 2 views yesterday:

That's not nothing! This shows the last month's worth of traffic to the Bombing!! 2 page, and that number was at least double yesterday as it was regularly. It's very cool to know a number of people did actually click through to the game page in order to view the game from the Blaze post.

But the real REAL question is how many bought or wishlisted the game because of this post?

I'll start with Sales, on a graph of 1 month of data:

Flat line :( Which is fine though, as the game wasn't on Sale and was just reaching people for the first time. I didn't honestly expect any immediate sales from this, and was more focused on other engagement anyways. Honestly I would be surprised if someone saw the game on a Blaze post and bought it immediately. I mean it's good but it's probably not THAT good!

Now to Wishlists, which can be a good indicator of who might likely buy your game in the future. Basically if someone has added a game to their wishlist, there's reason to believe they might buy it in the future, which is good for your game.

Here's the Wishlists for Bombing!! 2 from the last month:

That's 23 Wishlists in one day! That's roughly ~18 Wishlists more than an average day!

It's hard to know if some of these are because of the post or just a statistical fluke. However, when compared to previous trends on the game page that's quite a noticeable difference. It means even if no one bought it now, they were interested enough to add it to their shortlist. Looking at it another way, if two people who Wishlisted decided to buy the game in the future the campaign will have paid for itself.

Conclusions

I think like any advertising if you go into it with a plan in mind and try to build something around a specific action, Blaze seems pretty worth it to me especially if I just want to get eyes on something. On top of the obvious data telling me people were interested in the game, there was a few folks who just plain complemented the game or acknowledged it 'was the first Blaze post they were actually interested in', which felt worth it in it's own qualitative sort of way. It's also worth noting my game sells for $20USD, so the margins are large enough that making it back isn't too challenging.

I think having an idea of the message I wanted to send really helped, and I'm sure I'd happily do this again with a larger audience and another plan (and probably will do it for when Centauri Dark releases).

[huhjxn]

eavesdrop part I

kim chaewon x fem!soloist!reader

you were badmouthing chaewon and unbeknownst to you, the kim chaewon heard what you said. now, you are baffled as to why chaewon seem to hate you when you literally just met.

! : swearing, angst, chaewon wtf

3.4k words

read part II here.

The hall was filled with people hurrying, trying to do their jobs, making sure that they would be able to do so without any delays. Panic was evident in some of their eyes while the others seem like they are used to this kind of day.

Kim Chaewon loses her balance for a bit as she was accidentally bumped by one of the stylists of a boy group that was about to go into their dressing room. Her eyes enlarged as she saw who she bumped into and Chaewon felt uneasy with it, "It's really not that big of a deal," she thought.

"Don't worry, I'm okay," Chaewon said with a smile that was professionally plastered on her face. The stylist nodded and uttered another apology before hurrying into the group's room.

Chaewon just finished performing on stage with Le Sserafim and was roaming to see if she would see any of her friends that were also promoting.

"She's so annoying, I swear to god," Chaewon heard a familiar voice as she was about to pass by a room with a door that was partly open. "Like that face that she makes? Chaewon seriously gets on my nerves every single time."

She froze on the spot. First of all, she found it absurd that an idol would shamelessly talk crap about her where she could easily get caught. Secondly, she couldn't fathom how a sweet and charming idol like you could do that when you don't even know each other.

Chaewon didn't want to accuse you of badmouthing her, so she decided to sneak a little peak just to be sure and there you were talking to The Boyz's Kim Sunwoo, a frown was very evident on your sickeningly beautiful face.

With her fists clenched, she went back to her dressing room, and when she arrived, her members were simply concerned why their leader seemed to be in such a foul mood.

You woke up to your phone ringing beside you. The obnoxiously loud volume of your ringtone pissed you off in the early hours of the day, so you immediately picked up the phone and answered the call from your manager. 

"Y/N, are you up?" She asked, knowing that she most likely woke you up. Stretching your limbs out and groaning at the sensation, you answered, "Yeah, I'm up now."

"Okay, good. I've got some news for you."

Chaewon's eyes faltered as her manager relayed the news to her. She refused to believe that it was real.

"Are you sure that it has to be me?" Chaewon clarified, "I mean, Kkura unnie is funny and great with variety shows, she's also the best at cooking among us, I think she would be a better fit for the show," she tried to negotiate.

"Chaewon," their manager started, maintaining eye contact with her, "You know that Sakura already has other schedules with Fearless Kkura."

The leader had no choice but to nod in agreement. Although she wanted to say that Yunjin would be a good candidate because the girl is absolutely hilarious, she decided to go with it. Deep down, she was also intrigued and curious about what could possibly happen while working with you.

You couldn't help but feel excited and panicked at the same time. The fact that you were about to work with Le Sserafim's Kim Chaewon still hasn't sunk in with you yet. You closely followed IZ*ONE when they were still active as a group, and you were a hundred percent aware that Kim Chaewon is an intimidating individual who seems to get upset easily and would sometimes bless her fansites with death glares. There's literally nothing to be afraid of.

Checking yourself out in the mirror for the last time, you tried to calm your nerves and took a sip from your cup of iced tea with a shot of espresso before releasing a huge sigh, "Sooyoung unnie seriously have a weird taste," you thought looking at the drink your friend ordered for you.

You put the cup down and left the dressing room, making your way to the studio. On your way there, you could feel your heart pounding, and you had no idea if it was because of the espresso or because you were finally about to meet Kim Chaewon.

When you entered the studio, you noticed that she wasn't there yet so you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. Smiling at all the staff that were present, you greeted them one by one.

Chaewon arrived at the scene and saw you laughing with the staffs. The sight was truly adorable but it made her seethe with anger, remembering what you said. However, before anyone could notice, she immediately changed her demeanor, and started greeting the staff as well.

After hearing some commotion behind you, you felt yourself momentarily freeze on the spot before hearing a sweet voice call for you. "Y/N?"

Turning to face the owner of the voice, you were met with a beautiful idol with a smile on her face, "Hi, I'm looking forward to working with you," Chaewon said before bowing.

You mirrored her actions and looked into her eyes. She seemed so lovely but there was definitely something off about her but you couldn't point your finger on it. Deciding to ignore it, you smiled at her and said, "It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Chaewon sunbaenim."

The both of you were getting ready to shoot a short show where you have to bake some pastries and sell it in a local cafe. In all honesty, you were confident in baking; it was your forte. What you're not confident with is baking with Chaewon. 

Although being the same age as her, there's no denying that she's got more experience than you. You also noticed how stiff she was when she's around you; you were worried that you wouldn't vibe with each other and the viewers might notice it as well. 

Trying to diminish the doubts that were currently clouding your head, you tried taking a deep breath before stealing a glance at Chaewon, only to see her already looking at you. 

To be more accurate, you saw her glaring at you. The sight was a total shock. "Is there something wrong?" You thought to yourself. Not long after, a production crew member approached the both of you and Chaewon immediately averted her eyes and smiled at the staff.

"We will be starting in 5, make sure that everything is good to go, and if you have any concerns, don't hesitate to call us," he said before approaching the camera. 

You faced your coworker for the day, "Good luck to us," you muttered unsurely, forcing up a smile despite the nerves eating you up. 

Chaewon studied your features, immediately taking notice of your fake smile before crafting a professional smile as well, "Let's do well today so we could go home early."

She could see your face falter and it took everything in her not to roll her eyes and shove you. "This is work," she reminded herself, "You have to be the bigger person."

The shoot started and little by little, the tension between the both of you disappeared. Mostly because Chaewon kept struggling while baking some of the pastries.

"I should just use this mixer for the cream right?" Chaewon asked. You looked up from where you were piping the macaron batter onto the parchment paper. 

You found it absolutely adorable how Chaewon looked so clueless but obviously you wouldn't tell her that. She looked at you expectantly and you realized that you haven't answered her question. 

"Yes, just be careful with it," you said as you felt the warmth on your cheeks and immediately broke eye contact, pretending to be very focused on your task when in reality you could practically do it with your eyes closed.

Chaewon nodded, turning the hand mixer on and using it on the cream. Unfortunately for her, the cream splattered onto her and as a response, she screamed. This immediately caught your attention and rushed to her side, worried that she might've gotten hurt. "Are you okay?" you asked, holding onto her wrist that was on the mixer.

Chaewon nodded, avoiding your eyes, "Yeah, but I'm covered in cream," she said in a cute voice, knowing that the both of you are still filming a content for the fans. Yes, it was for the fans and for the fans only.

You grinned subconsciously, getting a piece of tissue to wipe off the cream on her face. You started wiping the cream on her nose as it was the most visible, and proceeded to wipe the ones that were on her forehead.

"Good thing we're wearing an apron," you joked, and Chaewon couldn't help but blush at her sudden awareness of your close distance. 

After wiping the cream off of her forehead, you took a new piece of tissue and wiped the cream off her lips. You were very focused on cleaning her up to notice the flustered state that the short-haired girl was in. That was until she reached for your wrist and you looked at her in question. Seeing her eyes so close to yours made you rapidly blink before taking a step back.

Chaewon gave a small smile of appreciation before holding onto the mixer once again. "Oh wait," you said.

She looked at you in question before you added, "Do you want to switch? I can mix the cream and you can pipe the macarons."

Nodding in agreement, she said with an awkward laugh, "Yeah, I think that would be better."

After putting the macarons inside the oven, you decided to initiate a conversation to make the atmosphere less awkward, "Have you already decided who you're giving these to?" 

Chaewon thought of an answer, "I'll most likely give it to my members," she said with a grin forming, "I think our maknae would love it."

You nodded, smiling at her answer, "Oh Manchae? You should also give her some of the cookies that we baked earlier," you looked through the small window of the kitchen to the counter that displays the pastries, "There's still a lot left from the batch that we made."

Chaewon agreed with a smile, but it slowly faltered, remembering that you aren't as kind as you act. "If she could say all those things about me, what's stopping her from bashing our maknae?" She thought, and immediately felt protective of her member.

"How about you?" You looked at her in question before she added, "Do you have anyone in mind who would be interested in receiving pastries from the most charming Y/N?"

Chaewon was being sarcastic but you were pretty oblivious and blushed at her words, "Uh, I might give them to my friend, Jung— KimLip from LOONA," you said before adding, "She celebrated her birthday recently and I could give this as a gift."

The short-haired girl nodded, not really caring about your answer. Yeah, she definitely didn't feel anything when you mentioned that you were giving your pastries to a very pretty idol. No, that would be absurd.

After wrapping up the shoot, the both of you thanked all of the staff for their hard work and you immediately grabbed a bag of some pastries that you personally baked earlier while Chaewon was in charge of manning the counter.

You looked around to find her but she had already left the studio. You went to look for her and saw her inside her dressing room alone. "Chaewon," you said with a smile, remembering how she told you to talk to her comfortably earlier during the shoot, "Here, you should take this home for your members, I'm sure they'll like it."

The girl smiled at you and took the bag from your grasp, "Thank you," she said sweetly, but suddenly the facade wore off. Chaewon dropped her smile as well as the bag and the pastries scattered on the floor, "But no thanks."

You stood there in shock. You didn't know how to respond; her whole demeanor changed and it felt like the Chaewon you just worked with was gone. "I—"

"Y/N," Chaewon started calmly but the venom in her tone was more than evident and it made you uncomfortable, "The camera is gone, we don't have to act like we like each other anymore so I suggest you take your trash and leave."

Chaewon felt so powerful as she let those words out, she wanted to pat herself on the shoulder for telling you off which she wanted to do ever since she overheard you talking crap about her. But after seeing the look on your face, she felt a pit on her stomach and she found it weird. Shouldn't she be relieved? Why was she feeling more upset? She convinced herself that it's because you looked upset when clearly she had every right to be upset at you.

You remained unmoving as Chaewon grabbed her stuff and left. You could feel the tears welling up as you looked at the scattered pastries on the floor, including the brownies that Chaewon stepped on when she was leaving.

It was absolutely humiliating. You felt so helpless. During the shoot, you thought that the both of you vibed with each other but it turns out that you didn't. Kim Chaewon was such a fake.

You went out of the room and went into yours to grab your stuff before leaving. You took out the phone from your pocket before texting your friend.

Unnie, I have something for you :) Are you free rn?

Not a minute later, she replied.

Yeah, I'm at Heejin's apartment with Hyunjin. Come over, the girls miss you

You went straight to Heejin's apartment and as you arrived at her door, it swung open even before ringing the bell. "Y/N! You're here!" Heejin greeted you, engulfing you in a hug.

Jungeun approached the both of you and said, "You made it." You went to wrap the girl in an embrace before saying, "Happy Birthday, unnie. I got you some of your favorites."

The three of you went to the dining area where Hyunjin was waiting, "You brought food?" she asked cheekily before Jungeun answered her, "Yes but it's for me!"

"Don't worry, Hyunjin," You said with a smile, "I got you some bread that I baked." Hyunjin perked up and approached you to grab the bag from your hold. Heejin studied your face as she noticed something different.

"Did something happen?" She asked suddenly and the two LOONA members looked at her in question. "I had a schedule earlier where I had to bake some pastries."

"Yeah, but that doesn't explain your puffy eyes," Heejin replied, the girls then looked at you and that's when they realized that Heejin was right.

You were just about to reply to her when her doorbell rang again. Hyunjin looked at Heejin before asking, "Are you expecting anyone else?"

She shook her head, "No." Heejin stood from her seat and approached the front door. Suddenly excited screams were heard and you immediately recognized the surprise guest before she even arrived at the dining area.

"Hi everyone!" Yena said with a grin that reached her eyes. Everyone greeted her back and they all engaged in small talks. You thought that you finally escaped the previous interrogation until Jungeun brought it up.

"Now Yena is going to hear about it too," you thought. You took a deep breath before telling your side of the story.

To say that Yena was surprised was an understatement. The LOONA members weren't close with Chaewon so they didn't have a say on the issue but Yena worked closely with her; they were literally roommates back when IZ*ONE was active. Chaewon was definitely not that kind of person. She looked at you sympathetically, because she knew that you couldn't have made that story up. Yena knew Chaewon but she knows you too; you trained with her in Pledis with Heejin and Hyunjin. Yena knew that something was wrong so she decided that she will ask Chaewon about it later.

A week later, Chaewon was practicing with her members when a sudden loud voice was heard inside the practice room, "Le Sserafim what's up?!" Yena greeted each of the members, almost tackling Sakura to the ground with a hug. Chaewon smiled at her former member and went to hug her as well.

"Unnie! What are you doing here?" Chaewon asked Yena as they separated from each other. Suddenly Yena smacked the back of the leader's head before replying, "To talk to you! I needed information from the source."

When their instructor gave them an hour break, Chaewon led Yena to the cafe in HYBE. They both took a seat and Chaewon looked at Yena expectantly, "So, what did you want to know?"

Yena took a sip from her cup before taking Chaewon off guard, "What's the problem between you and Y/N?" The short-haired girl almost choked on her drink when Yena mentioned you.

"Y/N?" Chaewon looked at Yena in surprise, "How did you know that we have a problem?"

Yena shrugged and said, "She was about to open it up to some of our LOONA friends when I arrived, so I heard about it."

"It shocked me a lot because I know you wouldn't do something like that, but I also know that Y/N wouldn't make up stories to ruin your image." Chaewon laughed sarcastically before saying, "She wouldn't make up stories to ruin my image but she'll definitely talk shit about me to her friends."

Yena was confused by what her friend said so she inquired, "Did she lie about what happened after the shoot?" Chaewon shook her head, "No, it's true. But I only did it in retaliation."

"What do you mean?" Yena was more lost than ever. Chaewon sighed before answering, "I overheard Y/N talking shit about me when I was about to pass by her dressing room in Inkigayo."

"I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt that maybe it wasn't her but when I checked inside, she was there talking to her friend from The Boyz." Yena looked at her with creased brows, "Who? Sunwoo?" Chaewon nodded and the older girl asked, "What did she say?"

Chaewon tried to remember the things that you said, "She told him about how the face that I make annoys her." Yena facepalmed herself, "So she said that 'Chaewon is annoying' is that right?"

The younger girl nodded and Yena wanted to smack her friend so badly, "Chaewon," she started, "You do realize that you're not the only Chaewon in the world, right?"

The short-haired girl rolled her eyes before answering, "I know, but who else would she be referring to? Our group just finished performing and I was even one of the ending fairies."

"Chaewon," Yena made sure to explain this to her friend calmly because she doesn't know how she would react to it, "Y/N's best friends are TBZ's Sunwoo and LOONA's Gowon," she said, studying the girl's face, but it seems like Chaewon still didn't understand what she was implying.

"The three of them are almost always present during each other's promotions," Chaewon looked at her friend in question, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Gowon's birth name is Chaewon."

Then everything crumbled at once. Chaewon's stomach dropped and the bad feeling she felt that never went away since she confronted you a week ago just got worse. Her thoughts were spiraling in her head.

She remembered the show you shot together, how you took care of her, how you made sure that she didn't do any of the challenging tasks, how you made sure to clean her up when she splattered the cream all over herself, how you were so close to her that it made her heart beat ten times faster, how you smiled at her when you gave her the bag of pastries that you worked hard on only for her to drop it on the floor and stepped on some of them, she remembered the look on your face when she acted like a total bitch to you, thinking that her actions were reasonable and that it was all your fault.

Yena could see the look of utter defeat on her friend's face, and she knew that she couldn't do anything at the moment to help her friend feel better. No, Chaewon will beat herself up knowing that she acted the way she did when you didn't do anything wrong.

And she's right. Chaewon felt like absolute shit because she remembered everything that you did for her and how she repaid your kindness. She fucked everything up.

: should i write a part 2 for this?

[disneyprincemuke]

u said "3k celebration" i heard "be annoying, terrorize me"

so here is from the prompt list: enemies but one is admitting, confessing and crying to the another after almost losing them!!!!!

WITH RBR!SEB cause 🫠🫠🫠🫠 (she could be a driver too mayhaps... maybe even teammates hm idk oopsie and uh seb is the one admitting cause i love pathetic men)

to be fair, my requests are always open so that i can be terrorised lolsie xoxo,, i ask the voices to stop but i actually like the voices

also, i've been writing this blurb for like an hour, hour and a half... i didn't know any other way to make this shorter than how it is now like idk tine u bring out the long winded writer in me idk

"what the hell were you thinking?" you watch blankly as sebastian walks into your hospital room. "your car literally split in half! are you not at least a little bit glad that you came out alive?" you stare at him before you rest your head gently on the pillow that christian had fluffed up behind you. you close your eyes. "no. i want to get some sleep. go away." "what the hell is wrong with you? wake up!" sebastian cries, throwing his head back. on the tv in the corner of the room, the race carries on. the race that you had both retired from after a nasty crash between you two. while his crash was minor, your car had broken in half. the race was delayed by almost two hours following the crash of the red bulls. "sebastian," you sigh tiredly, opening your eyes. "go away. we're seriously not close enough for you to care this much about my crash." "what are you talking about?" "be serious right now." he tilts his head, hands on his hips. "i don't understand." "we don't like each other. cut the crap, sebastian," you sigh, adjusting yourself under the blanket that christian had laid over you. "just go away. let's fight later when i'm off the meds." "what do you mean? i like you." sebastian lowers his voice, looking down at you. a hand hovers over you gently. "why would you say i don't?" "we've been at each other's throats since christian promoted me from the junior team," you huff, turning around to face the other side of the bed. "stop pretending you care for me. do you need me to speak in german for you to understand? nico taught me." "i don't hate you!" sebastian tugs at his hair, looking down at you in confusion. "i don't hate you! i'm in love with you!" you move your head, wincing slightly when a sharp pain shoots through your neck. "what did you just say?" "i've been in love with you the moment you walked into the red bull racing home for an f2 race last year!" sebastian groans, throwing his head back in dismay. "are you seriously so oblivious?" but, you just close your eyes again. you steady your breathing, begging for the medication to hit you the way it had a couple minutes ago. you try to ignore the way your heart races in your chest and the way you can no longer bite back the smile growing on your face. perhaps nico and lewis were right when they teased you just about a week ago about sebastian liking you more than you assessed. though, it is a little childish that the world champion had reduced himself to playground tactics to try and rile you up. all the teasing, the endless one-sided flirting, winking at you across the room during team dinners. it's more infuriating than anything you've ever known in the world. you huff. "i don't want to talk about this right now, sebastian. please go away."

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

thoughts on sokka and zuko's netflix actors ian ousley and dallas liu (jokingly?) teasing zukka in interviews? are they queerbaiting?

For those who don't know what the fuck queerbaiting is: you know how Disney announced "it's first openly gay character" in literally every movie they've been releasing lately, and these "characters" are always on screen for only 5 seconds so it won't annoy conservatives or be banned in China?

That's them trying to use the promise of gay content to get people (be it gay people or someone that just wants to know if Disney will handle the subject properly) to watch their stuff. It's just false advertizing in rainbow colors.

Netflix, being the cheap bastards that they are, love using "We got minorities in this!" to advertise either their bland, bad shows that will get a million seasons, or the rare good show that they'll cancel way too soon because they seem to be alergic to quality. Either way, the gay content they promise audiences is usually there - you know, it's just not good because Netflix hates good things. Hell, they made Oma and Shu a lesbian couple from what I've seen.

Considering I've heard that the cast of the Avatar Live Action is pretty comfortable dunking on Zutara as a ship despite it being crazy popular and some fans literally only watching the show because they thought it'd make Zutara canon, and even having the balls of saying their show is less problematic than the OG one because they cut the plot of Sokka unlearning sexism, I'd say they're not claiming to like Zukka because some executive told them to, in the hopes of getting people to watch. The actors are probably either two buddies joking around because "Dude, what if our characters got together?" or saw some fanart/headcanon on Twitter and rolled with it.

So no, it's not queerbaiting, it's just actors voicing their opinion - basically the same as the Wedneday situation. The actresses for Wednesday and Enid ship their characters, but Netflix never gave any indication that these two would be a thing, and the internet only cried QUEERBAITING because people can't accept that sometimes the goth girl and the girly girl don't kiss because none of the writers even thought about making them gay.

And before someone inevitably goes "Oh but one/both of them are straight/don't want to discuss their own sexualities - are they queerbaiting when showing excitment at the idea of their characters hooking up?"

1 - Real people can't queerbait because their sexuality is a personal matter, not a product meant for other people to consume.

2 - If Netflix does want to make Zukka a thing (and I've seen nothing to sugest that they do) and starts promoting it, it's the CHARACTERS that would have to be gay, not the actors. I'm pretty sure Zuko's actor can't create/control flames at the palm of his hand, but that doesn't mean he's lying to people, he's just an actor acting. Even if and Sokka's actor have to play a gay couple at some point, it won't be queerbaiting for them to do so and even be excited for it/thinks it makes sense for their characters, regardless of what sexuality they are in real life, because the actors are not their characters they're just people doing a job.

[scaredcrab]

Macaque x Reader - Silly Vallentine

Promotional Disclaimer: This chapter is being posted here to promote the whole work on AO3! To read more chapters, go to the AO3 link, in fact, the new chapters will be posted there first!

✐ 1 Chapter summary: Overcome by boredom, Macaque goes for a walk on Valentine's Day and finds you. An event that turns out to be more amusing than expected.

✐ Category: Fluff; Hurt/Comfort; Cute; Slow Burn; Slow Romance; Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence; Reader-Insert; Touch-Starved; Cuddling & Snuggling; Foreign Reader; Gender-Neutral Pronouns; Humor; Mythology References; Not Beta Read.

Trigger Warning (for the whole work, not this chapter in particular): Angst; Blood and Violence; Trust Issues; Self-Esteem Issues; Self-Worth Issues; lots of issues; Xenophobia; Trauma; Swearing; Emotional Baggage; Emotional Hurt.

-✐-☾-✐-☾-✐-☾-✐-☾-✐-☾-✐-☾-✐-☾-

Chapter 1 - Valentine

This kind of celebration usually doesn't matter much to warriors dedicated only to fighting and revenge, there's no time to meet new people and to love if you're busy going after a hated acquaintance.

But that doesn't mean boredom can't knock on these people's doors.

A powerful monkey demon walks through a large city disguised as an ordinary human. The monotony of his hiding place had ended up irritating him, resulting in a stroll during "lovers day".

The tedium was enormous to make someone so reclusive go out on a day like this. Streets are full of commemorative decorations, mainly pink heart-shaped ornaments, and serenades with sweet music can be heard everywhere, even the sky looked rosier than usual, however what occupies the surroundings more than the color pink are couples laughing. 

Couples that make you want to throw up for being so clingy, many of them look like exaggerated caricatures of what a happy pair would look like. The demon even rolled his eyes when he heard some phrases from the loose lovebirds, sometimes having a good hearing is a nightmare.

"I'm scared, honey, what if I don't like the people at the party?" - A short girl passes by the monkey.

"Calm down, if you get nervous, we'll just get out of there. Trust me, we're in this together." - The other girl takes one of her partner's shoulders and speaks in a sweet, calm voice.

He stops in place, for a brief moment.

... Yeah, even though the concept of clingy couples was a little annoying, there was a part of him that held a certain... Interest. 

The idea of having someone who cares about your emotional and physical state, the idea of being appreciated, someone to give you attention and affection, someone to trust, all of this was somehow pleasant to imagine. A part of him really craved someone he could actually count on, someone that would actually choose to stay with him.

The warrior shook his head to get that unimportant feeling out of there. Is the holiday making him emotional? This is so pathetic. Like, come on, he had more fun things to do than that!

The biggest fun of being on the streets today is watching couples break up. Or to see people rejecting each other. Dramatic love situations filled with people with broken hearts, looking like over-the-top soap operas in real life. That was pure entertainment.

A rattling bell and the sound of hard material hitting the wall shows that someone has opened a door not far away with incredible brute force, the door in question being the door of a luxuriant restaurant.

"Wait! Come back! What did I do wrong, my little pudding?!" - A man cried while trying to reach a woman in a fancy dress.

"I've already made it clear to you that I hate it when you call me that. What were you thinking, showing up dressed like that in front of my entire family?" - She pointed with her index finger at the clown nose the man had on his face.

"I-I wanted to make your family have fun."

"You made everyone laugh at me! Laugh at us. You made me look like an idiot!"

Ooh, this was a good drama, an argument for a ridiculous reason. This gives a bunch of inspiration to an artist, stupid story scenarios becomes the perfect reference to fun scenes. The beauty and the clown, yeah, this could be the theme of a shadow play, a funny one. A few laughs escaped the demon's lips, so much suffering for such a stupid reason was a special comedy to watch.

Unfortunately for him, the pairing didn't take long to reconcile, returning to the restaurant's interior happily and holding hands.

He rolled his eyes at the scene, boredom returned and, so did his quest for entertainment. Maybe looking for fun outside the hideout wasn't such a good idea at all.

He looked at the restaurant through the front window, taking off his hood of his head, so it wouldn't get in the way of the view, inside there were several couples eating fancy dishes that looked delicious...

Ah yes, the second reason to go out today, the food.

The dishes had too many heart decorations for the Six Eared Macaque's taste, however, that didn't change how tasty they looked. Main courses full of meats and spices, a big variety of drinks and sugary desserts filled the space in every busy table.

If he sneaks into the shadows the right way, it won't be hard to get some good meals.

His belly growled.

"AaaAh! That was loud!" - He looked to the side and saw... You. - "Gosh, you scared me!"

Macaque jumped startled, he hadn't seen that a human had approached to look in the window too. A loud noise came from your belly almost as if it was competing with his stomach.

"Oh... You must be hungry. You also don't have a partner to eat a Valentine's Day food?" - Your hunger had reminded you of that scary noise that came from his tummy.

Macaque was starting to consider fleeing away from there, all he needs less now is boring small talk in the midst of invasion plans.

"Today there are various places offering special dishes for couples, but only for couples." - You keep talking even without hearing an answer from him. - "I'm alone too, so I understand the feeling of walking around without a partner, it makes us think about all the good food we're missing. I only left my house today to see everything decorated and pink, you know. I wanted to see the city transformed." 

/ Does this human get chatty when hungry, or are they just naturally annoying? /

After that thought, the belly of the two rumbled together, a synchronized noise, it sounded like a were a rehearsed trick.

"Argh! Those foods look so delicious! I would even pay someone to accompany me, pretending to be my partner."

/ Wait a minute, what did they just say? /

"Would you really pay someone to do something like that?" - An interest appeared behind the question.

"Of course, I really want the couples discounts and stuff." - You answered honestly without even thinking twice, it's a habit of yours that ends up putting you in complicated situations all the time.

A mischievous grin broke out on his face. 

He turned around and put a hand on your shoulder to have your attention just for him, you look into the eyes of the man who was holding you. - "Well, today is your lucky day! I am completely willing to cooperate with you in exchange for a good payment."

Now the human eyes stared at the man, the owner of those eyes carrying a certain nervousness within them. We all know that you shouldn't make deals with strangers, you know that very well yourself, but this is an opportunity to eat the exclusive foods that will only be available for today...

You took a good look at his figure to study his details, checking out the sparkle in his eyes, the charming smile, the beard that added the final touch to his attractive face. He wears clothes in nice colors that match each other, specifically dark red and black, his dark hair wasn't super tidy but wasn't tossed around either. The strands look very soft too, a strange urge to stroke the locks of hair haunted your head, but you held back. A man full of charisma stood before you.

You had to admit, he is hot. He is really hot, and he probably knows that (right?), so how expensive would that service be?

"... And how much would be a good payment in your opinion?"

He moved closer to your ear (a thing that made your whole body heat up and shiver) and using a seductive, soft voice, he whispered the value. Your brain melted hearing the voice while collapsed, listening to the number being said. God. The company of pretty men really was expensive.

He seemed to be delighted to see you shudder, to see you making such a shocked expression at the answer, a smug and satisfied smile graced his face. And honestly, this attitude only made you feel more silly feelings in your chest.

"My lord! This much just because you're handsome?!"

"Nice try, but flattering me isn't going to make me change the price I set."

"W-Wait! Let's talk a few things before accepting any price! Like, what places do you allow us to go? What couple things I can do with you? What are your personal boundaries? It wouldn't be fair to charge a specific amount without considering certain things."

The man stares at you intently for a few seconds like someone trying to see through dark glass, arms crossed defensively as he "scans" you up and down. He seemed to be searching for lies through the aura of your soul, or something like this.

"... Like a spoken contract? A kind of sacred agreement between us?" - You nodded with your head.

After thinking some more, Macaque started to say his limitations: No kisses. No hugs. No pet names. You're only allowed to walk holding hands (so you don't end up getting lost). 

On your turn to speak, you negotiate the places to visit: an elegant restaurant, a chocolate fondue stand and a cute cafe. These places had great deals for couples and unique Valentine's Day dishes.

/ Isn't that too much food for just one person? /

He had no idea how much food would fit in your stomach, but he could eat a lot himself, so he was getting a big prize. Caring for you was the least of his worries, so your final state at the end of the tour doesn't matter as long as he's well paid and well-fed. 

Being so demanding and limiting turned out to affect the final price of the deal, you would have to pay less to the fake boyfriend, but it was still a hefty price.

With everything settled, it was time to pay.

You looked in your wallet with a sad expression. - "Goodbye sweet money, I will never forget you."

When you were about to hand over the payment, you remembered a basic socialization step.

"Wait a minute! I don't know your name." - You held your money close to your chest, hesitating.

The monkey blinked in disbelief, processing the moment, of all suspicious things was it the lack of name that made you hesitate?

A light chuckle escaped from him. - "You can call me Mac. What about you?"

After revealing your name, you glared at the man as you slowly handed over the money, taking your time to say goodbye to the lost fortune. When he took the money from your hands, you made a thin little noise of suffering. Honestly, you're so exaggerated.

We can say that you're dumb too! Knowing each other's names isn't going to stop one from running off with the payment. Lucky for you, Macaque was starting to be entertained by the human innocence. Or would it be better to say stupidity instead of innocence?

Well, it doesn't matter, a fake date has begun.

[battorlstuff]

Filling his Ego with my Jealousy

Hey, so inspiration just came I guess, do you think I should do more short stories like this, I hope you enjoy it…

I've been plotting this for a while, my stepbrother Alan is a jerk, he thinks he's better than me because he's hot and has all those muscles, I hate his fucking attitude, but most of all I hate that it's true I'm so jealous of the fucker. I hated the idea of ​​having to move in with him, seeing his muscles every day, the cocky asshole sure spends his time shirtless to show off his slim sexy physique. While I'm the fat pig, the laughing stock of the family, of school, of his friends…fuck I wish Alan was the fat one…one day watching him eat a burger I had an idea, and for the first time I was glad to live with him.

It wasn't necessary to find Alan's weak spot, I would create a weak spot for him, a little tobacco and some more ground up drugs, that was all I needed.

I started by putting some of the powder in the food and ordering from that restaurant that he likes so much, Alan would come home from the gym and eat what was on the table, but I hated that the process was so slow, plus Alan didn't eat it all, sometimes he doesn't even seem hungry. So I got rid of all the other food, any food that was healthy, so my stepbrother would have no choice but to eat junk food, but there was something else, I needed Alan to stop working out, to stop burning those precious calories and for those muscles to atrophy and lose their strength, so the sound of the blender while Alan was making his protein shake gave me an idea.

The idiot had a predictable schedule and routine, all I had to do was put an appetite-stimulating powder in his protein powder, so when he drank it before going to the gym he would have about 5 minutes until it took effect.

I smiled from the window as I watched Alan writhe in hunger and run back home, obviously the table was set, full of burgers, cakes, pizza, fried chicken, milkshakes, bacon, the idiot came and sat down without thinking about what he was doing, about the shitty food he was putting into his beautiful body.

Every day the effect accelerated, every day Alan prepared his backpack at the same time to go to the gym or to football practice, he came out with his tight tank top, tighter and tighter, he prepared his protein shake and then I set the table full of food, I went back to my room and left when I heard Alan sit down. There he was, I recorded him, I took pictures, I saw him swallow every damn thing, I loved seeing him like a pig devouring everything desperately, eating burgers in three bites, swallowing bacon, choking on milkshakes as if he hadn't eaten for weeks.

So I grabbed his computer, the arrogant asshole made an onlyfans full of pictures of his beautiful body, not knowing Alan's account was suddenly full of pictures and videos of his downfall, his progress, his new fans? Well I promoted the account to all the fat guys Alan had annoyed and soon with that money I got more and more to keep fattening him up, and at the same time he was publicly humiliated, while they would see his downfall, how he went from a sexy stud to a fucking disgusting obese pig.

The first thing to go were his abs, to my delight, then his pecs hung like two bags filled with fat, they started hanging over his belly, then his belly button and well let's just say that if it weren't for all those rolls of fat his mobs would reach his ankles… his biceps and triceps were gone, only some obese arms full of stretch marks remained, his legs, I can't even see them under the shadow of his belly, although I can assure you that they are fat, beyond fat, it's hard for him to get up.

"Take that you damn idiot…" I celebrated from the shadows watching his belly while he looked at himself in the mirror as if he was about to burst into tears, he was all messy , even his efforts to stand up, that's right, the arrogant Adonis had to make a tremendous effort to get up and walk.

"uhjhggg….pfffggg. mfgggg…" was all that could be heard in the videos as he trembled from the effort and his face was red, he was sweating profusely and he fell back onto the couch exhausted, huffing and puffing.

I would love to say it was a slow process, but it was actually quick, a few months and he was done, I guess his muscular body was so used to constant physical activity, exercise and those long routines in the gym and football that the absolute cessation of any effort made Alan downwards. Maybe that was my fault too, I mean I think I should have stopped sprinkling that tobacco dust on his food or was it the appetite stimulant? Anyway, Alan was more than addicted, his hands shook as he put food in his mouth, he spent his days in the living room, he slept there, he ate there, he only got up to go to the bathroom, but he forgot to shower, his hair became greasy and his teeth yellowed, his skin was full of acne and pimples, not only his face, but his flabby ass and his moobs, Alan looked disgusting, Alan was ugly?!!! He was more than ugly!! That made me more than happy.

Was this really my stepbrother? Even I sometimes have a hard time recognizing it, I spent so many years looking at his muscles, that my mind doesn't connect those memories with the fat pig that now lies on the floor panting and sweating while choking on lasagna.

"HEY FUCKING FATMAN" I say, I'm always glad to see him, to see what I did to him, to see how the cocky jock he once was ended up like this, he took the camera and I approach him with a bucket of fried chicken.

He looks at me with hatred and resentment as I feed him, I just laugh because Alan keeps eating, he can't stop anymore, he can't go back to being the stud he used to be, if anyone ever believes he was.

I love seeing him like this, so weak and useless, broken, I force him to look at himself in the mirror while he eats and he starts crying like a baby, I don't care if I'm still fat, I just care that Alan is ruined and obese, well at least I can walk without help, Alan can't even lift his fat arms to take out the fried chicken.

"That's right, eat fatso… you're not so arrogant anymore, huh?"

[fuck-customers]

I think this might be the case at other stores, but I don't have enough work experience to really know.

Does anyone else's corporate/bosses/higher ups semi-regularly become extremely obsessed with "improving the numbers" of a certain thing and force all the employees to obsessively do X thing to improve X numbers and make their lives hell for a few months and then completely drop it? Lmao

I'll give you 2 examples that I can immediately think of.

A few years ago at a job, maybe 3 years ago, the managers/corporate/whoever were OBSESSED with our greeting numbers. Like when a customer walks in the door, they were on our ass to greet them and say "welcome to [store name]" or at least "hi, welcome in" or some kind of acknowledgement. (Personally I didn't find this TOO irritating, more mildly annoying, however it did cause me to have a weird pavlovian response to automatic doors to the point where I've accidentally said "hi welcome in" when I was a customer in other stores with doors that made the same sound lmao rip) And then after a few months, they just totally dropped it. I haven't been told to welcome anyone in, haven't even heard a peep about any greeting numbers in at least 2 years.

The current one is still ongoing, but is tapering off.

About 2 years ago, corporate or whoever the fuck decided that we absolutely needed to start harrassing our customers into handing over their personal information in the form of their email, and then after we got a new register system, their phone number, under the guise of a "rewards system" that didn't exist.

(Sorry, side tangent here- this one is SO shady. I've never been able to get a straight answer as to WHY we need to get the info from customers or WHAT benefit it would have for customers, you know, since they were rightfully asking why they should provide this information. I had a manager say it was a "rewards system" and then when I asked how the customers could earn points and how I could view their points to tell them how many points they had or how could I apply their reward to the transaction, backtracked and said there was no rewards. Bro what?? This manager would tell customers themselves this, minus the part about it all being a lie, of course, so customers would get pissed because they weren't getting discounts that didn't exist. And THEN after this "rewards system" bullshit blew up in his face, the manager said that the phone numbers were so in the rare event that a customer MIGHT want to return an item but lost their receipt, they could do a return through their phone number. But....we've ALWAYS been able to do no reciept returns...it just had to be a manager who processes the return...the manager who was lying to me about all of this shit...hmm...)

ANYWAY, managers were pretty rabid about the stupid ass phone numbers and what each employee's individual percentages were and would publicly shame employees with low percentages by posting everyone's scores in the breakroom and highlighting those with low scores and put a condescending note like "[name] and [name] need to try harder" or "too many numbers below 70%" or whatever. And it was all the managers would talk about: how many numbers you got, how to increase numbers, tactics for manipulating people into giving their personal info, etc. etc.

And then it started tapering off about 6 months ago and for the past month or so, I have not heard a single peep about phone numbers or percentages or scores or whatever.

So what the fuck was that all about? Has anyone else experienced anything similar? Is this common or is my workplace nuts?

I know with the companies I worked for they would hire an outside audit agency to come in and look at our metrics and if one was low (i.e. not greeting) they would focus on that until the next one would say we were not promoting the rewards program. Next time it was asking if they found everything.

I'm not saying every company is like that but three of the ones I worked for did that.

-Rodney

[the-monkey-ruler]

hi, I don't know if you've heard about “Journey to the West: The Real and Fake Monkey King”, starring the actor of the monkey king from 1986? This year only the poster came out and from what I saw the project is somewhat controversial.

Oh yeah I've been hearing about this one! I think this might be part of the Monkey King 2014 verse but I'm not sure as the summary of the movie seemed to have changed.

I’ve only found websites that talk about the synopsis, do you mind telling me where you saw this? Unless you are talking about Liu Xiao Ling Tong himself as he is kinda seen as a.... purist I think is the right word to use. He has become kinda a meme in recent years as he is very judgemental of Sun Wukong adaptions that do not fit his mold of what he thinks the Monkey King represents, "Parodies should not be nonsense, adaptations should not be groundless recreations" and even advocated for laws banning parodies of classics.

"The sensation of Liuxue started when a cohort of trolls poked fun at Zhang’s years-long attempt to increase his relevance after starring as Sun Wukong 孙悟空, a.k.a. the Monkey King, in a 1986 television adaption of Journey to the West (西游记 Xīyóujì). The role is widely regarded as the pinnacle of Zhang’s acting career. Seeing generally tepid reception to his subsequent works, Zhang morphed into an objectively annoying celebrity who perennially dwells on his best-received performance, constantly boasting about his legacy and attaching his entire worth on the original novel and its variations, a cultural heritage to which Zhang only made a relatively small contribution.But unlike other sellout artists, Zhang went so far that people are now questioning his sanity. It’s documented that, at certain speaking engagements, he branded himself as the only person alive who can offer definitive interpretations of the original Journey to the West. At the funeral of Yang Jie 杨洁, director of the 1986 TV adaption, Zhang filmed a video promoting an upcoming movie where he plays the character again."

In any case, he does seem to be extreme in his views but I can't say if he is considered to be controversial moreso eccentric. While I don't agree with him and I do like the advocacy of laws banning parodies is borderline ludicrous, I can't say that he actually has any power or persuasion to make these realities. I can see why he is treated more as a joke/meme as what he is saying is impossible as there have been more adaptions than ever before. I hope that if he does get this movie made then at least his actors are paid well and that the movie production itself goes smoothly.

If this wasn't what you were talking about please let me know what you hear! Would love to know what’s going on!

[aphrodite1288]

Jongin is friends with homophobic and generally-horrible-ass-person Siwon? He’s really got no right to be judging any of Kyungsoo’s friends, ever 🥴

First off, I clearly said Exo are not so close with these people just friends and they do talk. And Exo themselves recently with"Eunchae" during Cream Soda promotions updated us on their status with their celebrity friends, and they clearly said " We have no friends anymore in the industry" and Xiumin jumped and said " We only have each other, stay away from making celebrity friends!" They literally warned her. Why would they do that? Because in their 15years to 16 years and for Baek it's 12 years since they joined the company in this period of time of course they made tons of friends and maybe later on they were hurt, offended, lied to, scammed, gaslit, manipulated or exposed so they had to stop these friendships at some point because they found it was wrong and consuming their energy especially during first years of debut and you know the Korean culture, the Hoobaes get forced to be nice and respectful to their sunbaes and older people which is stupid because you should be nice even to people you dislike. So we don't know their status with their celebrity friends now. I don't know Since last time We saw Ji eating with Siwon in 2017 and 2018 we never heard of them ever again. So we never know their friendship status now. For Siwon's case he is a very religious christian and he said This is against God's will in the bible, and in sure every christian knows that being gay is a massive Sin basically in every Religion, it's fine if people think differently from you, if they can't accept something doesn't make them bad people, Siwon ate his own bandmate's head and tried all his best for so many years to make him go back on track and make him believe in God 😂 and you know who I'm talking about "HEECHUL" and the latter many times have shared he was so annoyed and literally fought with Siwon because Siwon insisted on making him believe there's a God and told him several times that he doesn't want him to go to Hell and he literally begged him to do not do this and to start believing in God because he loved him and he doesn't want him to sin and go to hell. So he did it out if a good motive. But that was his bandmate of almost 20 years! Would he be this close to tell Ji " You're gay you're sinning" I don't even think Jongin ever opened up about his personal life and sexual orientation to Siwon ever, Ji is a very private person, I heard even the Exos and their managers never got to see Kadi making out and That there was only twice where Kadi stole a very chast Pecks from each other in Inkigayo and AAA in their waiting room but no members were looking and that's how we got the famous two Kadi kisses. Because they're just too respectful around their bandmates that they don't wanna make them uncomfortable. Because also them believe that not everyone would be accepting of them.

Sometimes your friends do wrong and do something toxic, you either leave them or forgive them and move on, like What Irene did, she is Suho's friend, but she had a massive disrespectful scandal with her Staff, and we still saw suho with her attending events, does that mean he supports her behavior? No! You give your friends advice and you can disagree with them and scold them and even fight them for their wrong but you can still be friends of course if what they did was not so over the limits. And sometimes I saw people in my circle even forgive their friends or partners for being a literal red flag with toxic traits. I'm not saying you should, but you never know when you can forgive someone for even hurting you. I've seen many women forgiving their cheating husbands even! I see them stupid but I don't know their hearts maybe they just couldn't let go of such toxic relationship, if it was me I move on and ghost people the very next day 🤣

For Ksoo's friends, where did I or any admin every say Ji judged Ksoo's "Hyung Actors Squad"? He only didn't like Insung because he has done some very crazy shit to Ksoo and to him, he was also trying to take Ksoo to gay bars introducing him to Sexy almost naked men who dance seductively, which can lead to massive scandals & Ruin his career, he was telling him to leave SM and join his company it's the main reason of their massive fight back in 2019, because Ksoo was so naive and nice, and old group members here do know the full story to this.

I have a non-accepting friend of mine, and my best cousin both can't accept the Gay agenda. I have a friend who disagreedbwith the way I'm dressing and My religion, but we're still friends, she did voice out her opinion with me very respectfully and I accepted it.

My cousin hated watching Young Royals BL with me and she told me she will leave while I was watching if I don't change the Serie to another one, and I did because I respect her opinion, yet she still respects her gay friends who study with her. But she isn't accepting of them from her own beliefs and traditions and religion. You can't force people what to think and like and what to dislike. But they just have to be respectful about it, not offending you directly! And I doubt Siwon or any celebrity would openly be homophobic with their supposedly Gay friend in their face, because after all they're idols and they have a reputation they're scared to ruin.And if Siwon ever offended him after he knew Ji was Gay I'm sure Ji would cut their friendship or maybe if he was shy from his sunbae, he would turn it into a fully Work-Friendship nothing more. You know what I mean.

And not every friend at work is your bestie. And I said they're just friends but not so close. And if there's anyone who's so open-minded it's Super Junior and SHINee and Amber from Fx, because they're besties with each other, and who's the openly gay? Yes Key and Amber. And they were so supportive of them. Also you should know for many years after Exo's debut not everyone knew they were in a relationship, only Key and Krystal and Seulgi Knew. Others were just hearing rumors about them but no one believed it at first, they thought they're baseless gossip from old Trainees who left SM and who trained with Exo.

[shortformdrip-blog]

If you follow my blog (that's about 5 real people and 30 bots btw) then you'll know I'm a bit obsessed with several of the indie animations that have risen to prominence on YouTube recently. I've tried to not be too annoying about it. 😁 That being said, my posts have run contrary to my stated goal for this year. This was supposed to be the Year of the Webcomic! The year where I keep up with the updates to all my old favorite comics but also read comics I've never touched before but have heard good things about, namely the titanic Homestuck. I really enjoyed what I read of Homestuck, and I will definitely get back to it at some point, but right now, it feels like a new dawn is rising for Western Animation. No way am I going to miss out on that!

So today I come, hat in hand, to promote a particular animation centric event to my handful of non-robotic followers! That being the GlitchX live streamed convention, Glitch Expo! Ofc the show runners of their own animated shows are going to be there, but they're also including the artistic minds behind other great animated projects. Not all of them have been revealed, but Tracy Butler, of Lackadaisy fame, is officially on the roster. How lucky am I, that I get to see the creators of my favorite shows come together for an event like this!? Absolutely incredible.

As for you, dear reader, I hope you'll join me in the hype leading up to the livestream! As we wait, care to wager a guess as to who the next guest on the list is? I think it'll be The creator of ENA, Joel G! That's my guess anyway.

Have a good day y'all! Until next time! Bye!

[vikenticomeshome]

Cyberchase - Season 1 Episode 1 "Lost my Marbles" (part 1) - How It All Started

Hello, all. I want to talk about a particular episode of Cyberchase today. I don't know if I will put together discussion posts like this for every episode, but I feel like I need to put one together about this one. This was the first proper episode for Cyberchase after the pilot episode. Sure, we had the three-part prequel web comics and other promotional material. However, I bet most people who saw this episode saw it before they saw the webcomic or other promotions.

I didn't see this when it first premiered, but I did see the re-runs. That was long before I knew about the web comics. So, where do we begin?

The Hacker: Ahahahahaha!

The Hacker: At last! The moment I've been waiting for! Haha. It's absolutely perfect.

Yeah, The Hacker gets the first line of the entire series. As if he was going to let anyone else have that.

Imagine you'd never heard of Cyberchase before. Imagine this was the first episode you'd ever seen. We have this clearly villainous character flying his ship through a strange world. And now he's laughing with evil intent while remotely spying on some children at a library.

Buzz: Yeah, you're right, Boss. Cyberspace is simply enchanting.

And then the more competent (?) of the two Duncebuckets gets the second line. Delete is noticeably silent in his introduction, and he looks annoyed that Buzz is interrupting The Hacker's speech. I feel like this dynamic flipped later in the show. Delete became more prone to outbursts, and Buzz did more to tug him back in line.

The Hacker: Those Earth kids are the key to my plan.

Buzz: Oh yeah, you mean your master plan for all-out domination of Cyberspace that will allow you to spread chaos and evil from site to site?

The Hacker: Of course that plan, you robotic duncebucket!

Buzz: I thought the only way to take over Cyberspace was to get rid of that Cyberbrain that runs it, Motherboard?

The Hacker: And so we shall.

So, Buzz is a good, if somewhat clunky, vehicle for exposition. He explains The Hacker's ultimate goal, as well as the big step that he is about to take to achieve that goal. He also refers to Motherboard as a Cyber-brain. It is possible that that was some sort of slur, but I don't think Buzz is that kind of bad guy. It's largely accepted by the community that Motherboard's species is called Cyber-brain. That raises the question as to whether there are more of her out there.

During this exchange, the scene cuts to the kids on Hacker's big board. They don't have dialogue yet, but this is the very first interaction among them.

Yeah, they were on The Hacker's screen earlier, but Matt and Jackie were frozen in the place, and Inez did some sort of idle animation. However, this shot, Matt and Jackie are clearly working together to figure out how the library map screen works. Matt is poking at the screen. Then, he looks in Jackie's direction. Jackie smiles ad gestures with her hand. Matt smiles back. Calm down, shippers. They just met. Oh, and Inez is standing there with her arms folded. Her expression is neutral. She may be annoyed at how long tweedle-dee and tweedle-dum are taking to figure out how the map works. She did have a long bike ride over here, and it was stated upon her arrival that the library was closing soon. I'm not sure how much work any of them expected to get done today.

Now, we enter Control Central and see Motherboard for the first time. Digit and Dr. Marbles are working on her.

Dr. Marbles: Upgrade nearly complete, Motherboard. Stand by for reboot.

Motherboard: Hurry, Dr. Marbles. My firewall's been down long enough. It's not safe.

Digit: Not safe! C'mon! What could possibly happen?

He just had to say that, didn't he.

Motherboard: Hacker alert! Hacker alert!

Digit: Hacker's Back?!

Dr. Marbles: Impossible! We drained his power grid and exiled him eons ago.

Inez: Excuse me? You two aren't the only ones who require access to this map.

Matt: Hang on, I'm just trying to figure out how to use it, okay?

Yeah, Inez is already done with their shit, and they haven't even been properly introduced.

Jackie: Alright, you're here, see? So, just find where you want to go and touch that spot.

I love that Jackie's first words in the episode were to try to calm down Matt and Inez. Jackie also just turned key #1 of 3.

Matt: Okay. Mythology... Mythology...cool!

And so, Matt turns key #2 of 3. We can see that the map drew a line between the Lobby and the Mythology room. I'm not sure how it would have helped with navigation though, as it seems to be a straight line or a simple curve. We also don't see any step-by-step directions.

Inez: But I need to go to the research room!

I love how Inez lunges for the map to tap the still-glowing Lobby button again. Matt and Jackie make a point of stepping backwards out of her way.

And so, Inez gets her useless directional line to the research room. She also turns key #3 of 3.

Inez: *gasp*

Matt: Hey, what's up with that?

Jackie: It looks like the icons are going to crash into each other, right...

Matt, Jackie, and Inez: Here!

Dr. Marbles: Hacker has found a way to breach the system!

Motherboard: Quickly, reload my firewall!

The Hacker: Behold, my half-baked henchmen. My concoction of computerized chaos is about to... attack!

Motherboard: Hacker has launched a virus. It's coming this way.

Digit: Hurry Doc! Hurry! Close her up!

Dr. Marbles: Firewall loading! 45! 50!

Motherboard: It's too late... the virus has invaded my circuits. It's shutting me down.

Dr. Marbles: Firewall up! No further damage anticipated.

Digit: She's in bad shape, huh, Doc?

Dr. Marbles: Her Encryptor Chip has been destroyed! I can't retrieve it! I've got to locate and install a new one.

Dr. Marbles's quest goes poorly, as Hacker immediately captures him.

So, let's pause for a moment and process what just happened here. The Hacker, who was apparently exiled eons ago, has returned. We know from the official prequel web comic, "How It All Started", that The Hacker attacked Valussa after he was banished, but before he infected Motherboard with the virus. That was a major event, as it led to Digit betraying The Hacker for the second time, The Hacker imprisoning Digit, and Digit escaping and defecting to Motherboard.

Assuming Digit gave Dr. Marble and Motherboard the full story of The Hacker's attack on Valussa, they had to know that The Hacker was still alive and capable of causing chaos on Cybersites in spite of his downgraded power supply. So, I don't know why Dr. Marbles is in such disbelief that The Hacker is back.

It's not clear what happened in the time period between the events of the comic "How it All Started Episode 2", where The Hacker attacked Valussa, and "Lost my Marbles". This gets murkier if we bring in The Flying Parallinis' storyline, since The Hacker was imprisoned on Mount Way-Up-There without Digit.

Maybe I was wrong in my original assessment of the Parallini's storyline. Maybe The Hacker's imprisonment on Mount Way-Up-There wasn't really a retcon. Maybe Motherboard was content to just stuff him in a pod and launch him to The Northern Frontier over the theft of The Encryptor Chip from "How It All Started Episode 1". But then, after he terrorized Valussa and Digit defected, perhaps Motherboard saw fit to put The Hacker on Mount Way-Up-There as an additional punishment. If so, there was apparently nothing there to alert Motherboard if he left the mountain. Now that I think of it, that arrangement might clear up the inconsistencies in Buzz and Delete's origin stories. We know The Hacker built them with parts from Cybersite Botopolis, but they also talk about a time when they worked in a cyber cheese factory unassociated with The Hacker. If we take Mount-Way-Up-There as a separate punishment, then perhaps Buzz and Delete lost their jobs when The Hacker went up the mountain. Then, when he came back down, he pulled them back in.

I'm not going to touch "Hacker Hugs a Tree", since that was 100% a retcon of How It All Started.

I don't think The Hacker attacked any other Cybersites between the Valussa event and the attack on Motherboard. I think he laid low while cooking up the virus. I suspect that sometime between The Hacker terrorizing Valussa and "Lost My Marbles", Motherboard, Dr. Marbles, and Digit got complacent. They figured he was just sulking in The Northern Frontier.

In addition to writing the code for the virus, The Hacker must have rigged that library map to open a breach in Motherboard's defenses. Even with her firewall down for maintenance, he couldn't launch the virus, or he would have done it. We also know that raising the firewall was able to prevent the virus from causing further damage after the initial infection. So, The Hacker needed her firewall down, and he needed the breach opened at the same time in order to pull this off.

But how did the breach work? I feel like I could make an entire separate post theorizing about that, and I probably will. I won't bog down this post with it though.

So, back in the real world...

Inez: You think we broke it?

Matt: I don't know.

Jackie: There must be some way to reboot this thing!

Motherboard: I am Motherboard.

Jackie: Uh oh.

Matt: Mother-who?

Jackie: We're in for it now! She's probably FBI!

Motherboard: I am protector of all Cyberspace.

Inez: Right, and I'm Xena, Warrior Princess.

Motherboard: When the three of you touched that map, a breach in Cyberspace allowed a nasty computer virus to reach me.

Motherboard already know their names, possibly through spying on them in the library. She pulls them into Cyberspace. This is the beginning of the next 20 years of their lives spent working to keep Cyberspace safe from The Hacker.

The old pitch documents claim that Motherboard "conducted an elaborate computer search of every being in every galaxy for the right combination of bravery, moxie and math skill", and these three actual children were the best for the job. That comes with the caveat that Motherboard had just suffered brain damage from a virus first, of course. There is a popular fan theory that she pulled them in to make amends for accidentally opening the breach.

They meet Digit.

Digit: Without Motherboard, everything and everyone in Cyberspace is doomed!

Jackie: You guys, we can't let that happen. We can't just stand by and let this Hacker guy destroy Cyberspace. We have to help! We just have to!

I love that Jackie is the first one to insist that all three of them band together to save Cyberspace. She doesn't know her new teammates, Motherboard, or the scope of the mission, but she's ready to ride or die.

Inez: Excuse me, I don't even know you guys. This is a major decision! I need time to think about it.

I love that Inez is being the rational one here, arguably more rational than Motherboard.

Matt: There isn't time to think about! We've got to act now! I'm in!

I love that, the moment Inez mentions taking time to think about it (i.e. waiting), Matt throws his hat into the ring with Jackie.

They don't get cyber-suits or virtual avatars, but they get, Sqwak Pads, funky little handheld computers for problem-solving and communication.

I'm nearing the limit for these posts, so I'll stop here. I'll make a part 2 for the rest of the episode, as there are some important scenes to high-light. I probably won't go scne-by-scene, since that will take forever. However, the scenes that I covered in this part were all very important, since they set up the premise for the show and introduce our characters.

[anhed-nia]

BLOGTOBER 10/22-23/2023: SMILE (2022) and BARBARIAN (2022) - In Defense of the Tall Gangly Old Lady Monster

I've heard a lot of complaints lately (haven't we all) about the recent emergence of a new horror archetype--the tall, gangly, old lady monster--and I always get the feeling that the plaintiffs are willfully ignoring the context of this apparition. I mean sure, if you feel annoyed with the rapid proliferation of a prematurely tired cliche, that's fair; personally I'm pretty sick of scary clowns, even though some of them are still effective, if your main proposal is a scary clown then you're going to have to work harder than usual to get my attention. But vis a vis the tall scary old lady discourse, as far as I've seen, the objection is almost always the same: This monster is an expression of disdain for elderly people, and a reinforcement of the idea that women are worthy so long as they are considered sexually viable, after which point they deserve only disgust and rejection. And like there will surely be boring, misogynistic representations of this monster that are fair to roll one's eyes at, but the most visible targets of this criticism have been SMILE and BARBARIAN, and I would argue that both films are full of ambivalence and irony, and the specific morphology of the monster is thoughtful and deliberate.

I think that any time you hear a complaint that is based on the assumption that a movie is promoting real-life ideals and ethics, you need to double check that. This is the propaganda model of media analysis, and while nothing is created in a vacuum, not everything has didactic, propagandistic motivations. Certainly some movies ARE doing just that; I see quite a lot of chauvinism and bigotry in action movies, comedies, and (perhaps most of all) romantic comedies, whose content is clearly presented as aspirational. Low-hanging fruit of this kind is found in movies like SWEET HOME ALABAMA, which says that self-made independent career women are just fooling themselves and should stay home and serve whoever gets them pregnant first, or the similarly retrogressive JUNO in which a girl who gets knocked up during high school is universally worshiped and supported by everybody and truly loved by the knocker-upper and there is almost nothing really perilous or concerning about the whole situation, it's all very cute and desirable. Horror movies require a little more investigation. Sometimes the monster does embody some kind of moral mandate, or an unjust injunction against a certain demographic. Hitchcock and De Palma have been accused of transphobia, for instance, and while I don't think we should throw out their movies (which you should never have to do unless you're incapable of critical thought), the charges are fair. But other times, the monster embodies unfinished business, ambivalence, irony, insecurity. It exists not as a symbol of universal evil, but as a foil to the hero. And sometimes the hero is not a hero at all.

All of the following is extensively spoilery, so proceed with whatever caution is appropriate: Zach Cregger's BARBARIAN is a delightfully twisty, prismatic reflection on misogynistic violence and its consequences. It begins with a simple-seeming situation that prods the viewer to guess what protagonist Georgina Campbell should do about the problem of an unplanned male roommate in her Airbnb. Bill Skarsgård is sketchy and intrusive, but charming enough to create a dilemma for the savvy young woman--a dilemma which ends abruptly with the discovery of a monster in the basement. The building itself has its own polar identity: It offers appealing lodging for hip Detroit tourists in a once-desirable neighborhood devastated by racist, capitalist forces. The home's previous owner was a serial killer (the great Richard Brake!) with a penchant for forcibly breeding his female victims, and it is now the possession of Justin Long, a hot shot actor who is so poisoned by his own witless misogyny that he seems genuinely unaware of what constitutes rape. Lurking in the labyrinthine foundations of his investment property is one of Brake's victims: A tall, powerful, barely-human female who has been warped into believing that her captives are actually her babies. While BARBARIAN is willfully disorienting, and that is part of its charm, a bird's eye view shows its careful orchestration of clear spectrum of forms of abuse--from the institutional, to the constitutional, to the unconscious--alongside a polar pair of potential survivors, one final girl and one twisted victim.

Much has been made of the scene in which Justin Long is forced to suckle on the pendulous teat of the maternal morlock. The common assumption seems to be that we're supposed to share Long's disgust and pity his violation. I would question any impulse to side with Long as an innocent victim; certainly you're supposed to fear the monster, but that doesn't mean you can't share in the cathartic delight of a selfish, greedy, destructive, gentrifying rapist getting his comeuppance in the form of unwanted carnal contact with a female who shatters all of his fascist beauty standards. Yes, she is meant to be terrifying, but the all-important question is WHY, on what principle? On any close inspection, the motivation of BARBARIAN does not seem to involve reinforcing ageist, ableist, misogynistic values. And one might add that, in general, it doesn't get us very far culturally or artistically to insist that all oppressed-minority characters are always presented unambiguously as heroes or tragic victims. Sometimes we don't mind grossing you out, as long as we get our revenge.

Much like the dark mother in BARBARIAN, the monstrosity in Parker Finn's SMILE embodies the protagonist's neurotic phobias, rather than making a statement about objective good and evil. Sosie Bacon plays a therapist in an emergency psychiatric unit who makes the unfortunate acquaintance of a transient entity that perpetuates its existence by possessing the witnesses of violent suicides. As the traumatized target begins to perceive the leering entity everywhere, she descends into a self-destructive spiral that will end with her own inevitable death. Bacon makes an especially good victim because, aside from the immediate impact of the horrifying suicide she witnesses in her ward, she is haunted by the childhood memory of having passively allowed her mentally ill, substance-dependent mother to die. As an adult, Bacon has eschewed the challenge of deeper connections in favor of shallow, conditional relationships with people who will not forgive her flaws when they are exposed. The demon exploits her refusal to face herself by incarnating as a version of her mother that is at first pitiful and accusative, then powerful and terrifying. Once again, the dark mother is not here to encourage the audience's prejudices against women who are dysfunctional or physically past their supposed prime; in SMILE she is an avenging spirit who forces the protagonist, and the audience, into a direct confrontation with all that we ignore and avoid.

There is a lot more I would like to say about SMILE, and I kind of feel like I'm stealing from future me by including it in this abbreviated review! But as I have previously stated, I didn't know this was going to be a speed run of Blogtober until I was completely overwhelmed by life and it was too late to curate accordingly. To be honest, I liked BARBARIAN a lot and I think it's sort of deep in spite of itself, but SMILE scared the absolute shit out of me both times that I saw it. I probably found it even more effective the second time. It is unpredictable and beautifully articulated, with a strong visual personality that perfectly serves its psychological purposes. And like, if you happen to be a high-anxiety person with social problems who withers under too much attention or eye contact, and you have a basic daily fear that you don't really know who people are behind their er um uh smiles, THIS IS THE HORROR MOVIE FOR YOU. I got scared again just picking out images for my blog post! So, I reserve the right to revisit both of these movies on future Blogtobers. There is certainly a lot to say just about the emerging horror archetype of the giantess/ogress--other examples that immediately spring to mind include the vampire from Resident Evil: Village and the final (TERRIFYING!) monster in the original [REC], and I'm sure there are more, and I'm also pretty sure some real-deal academic will scoop me on this! Actually, I hope they do. Please holler at me when you inevitably see the relevant think piece.

[theconstitutionisgayculture]

Opinions on stigmas around mental health? TBH I agree with most, if not all of what you say, but I'm still somewhat hesitant to align with republicans and other right leaning groups due to some nasty things i've heard about how they treat the mentally unwell I, personally was diagnosed with an Impulse Control Disorder (Pyromania), and I get really nervous when I hear people talking about how the mentally unwell should be sent to jail at the slightest sign of duress. I'm not actively violent and I can control myself, but I fear there is a slippery slope when it comes to criminalizing mental illness, and as such, I'm nervous to support groups who do such. Again, I'm not SUPER informed on this, but is there any comfort? I don't want to get arrested because I struggle with a pathological addiction to fire, but I also don't want my freedoms stripped from me by some pronoun worshipping assholes who don't actually care for real transgender and gay folk. Its dizzying navigating these systems as an outcast.

Hope this reaches you well my favorite gun toting gay.

I can honestly say I've never seen anyone on the right say the mentally ill should be locked up. Do you have specific examples of someone saying something like that? Something you overheard or read personally, and wasn't relayed to you by a social media post or an article headline?

My personal opinion on mental illness, and the stigma surrounding it, is that mental illness should be treated like any other illness. When someone goes to get help from a professional, they shouldn't be mocked by their friends or family and the professional should do their best to treat the person correctly. I think where many on the right get annoyed with people who claim to have mental illness is when they either,

refuse to get professionally diagnosed and just claim they have a laundry list of mental health issues

treat mental illness like a trend or a personality quirk

actively promote the idea that getting treatment is wrong or bigoted in some way

use their mental illnesses as a shield from criticism or to hide from the consequences of their actions

There are also a lot of things, like ADD/ADHD, autism, and gender dysphoria, that many of us suspect are being overdiagnosed, either by doctors who mean well but are following flawed guidelines, or by doctors who are actively pushing either a social agenda, or are acting on behalf of organizations, like pharma companies, that have a financial stake in those illnesses being diagnosed regularly. After covid we all have a very healthy skepticism of the pharmaceutical industry and the politicians in its pockets.

But I think where your confusion might come in is when we say that mental illness isn't an excuse for performing bad actions. When we say that, we don't mean that we have no sympathy for the mentally ill (well, most of us anyway). What we mean is that, when someone causes harm to another person, and then tries to claim that they can't be punished because of their mental illnesses, we don't buy into that. Let's take your pyromania as an example.

If you were playing with fire inside an apartment building and it accidentally got out of control, causing the building to catch fire, destroying property and injuring, or killing, people who lived there, you would be hard pressed to find a conservative who would think you should just be let free with zero repercussions. Even if we sympathize with your illness, the fact is your actions caused others real harm, physically, emotionally, and/or financially. We wouldn't support ignoring that harm just because you didn't mean to cause the fire, or you couldn't control yourself. If you can't control your urges to the point that you cause harm, you should probably be in an institution somewhere because you're a danger to yourself and others.

But if you can control yourself, then I don't see anyone saying you should be locked up for having urges. Most of us are very against the idea of thought crimes, though YMMV on that since some of us tend to get emotional about certain thoughts, even if those thoughts never lead to actions. But that's just the natural hypocrisy you're gonna get with any group, and I can at least promise that I try to recognize when I'm thinking that way and stop myself.

Also, another thing to remember, is that just because you agree with conservatives on some things, or even most things, that doesn't mean you have to agree with us on everything. You can absolutely stand with us when we support the things you do, and stand against us when we support something that goes against your morals. Hell, I do it all the time with TERFs. Most of their ideas are abhorrent, but when it comes to protecting women from predatory men pretending to be transgender, I can find at least that much common ground.

And who knows? If you get to be friends with enough of us, maybe knowing you and being friends with you will change how we see mental illness. The best way to both find out what someone believes, and to change their mind, is to talk with them. If some of us have ideas you don't like, or if it seems like we do, but you aren't sure, talk with us like you're doing with me right now. I can't speak for every conservative. I can only speak for myself and give you my impressions of this issue.

[sixx6sexx2love]

DATING YNGWIE MALMSTEEN

OMGG ITS BEEN FOREVER IM SORRY🙏 MY MEDS ARE STABLE NOW. AND ALSO IF U GUYS DONT KNOW WHO YNGWIE MALMSTEEN IS JUST PLS PLS READ IT I THINK YOU GUYS WOULD LIKE HIM (HES ALSO A CAT PERSON!!)

also his name is pronounced “ing-vay” so u guys won't say some stupid shit like “yeeng-wee”💀

word count: 815

warnings: alcohol, arguments

dating Yngwie malmsteen, a guitar god, would definitely be something.

In the 80s, he was at the height of his career, and his band, Rising Force, was gaining popularity worldwide but you guys would probably start dating when he was already doing solo work.

If you dated him in the 80s, you would have experienced firsthand his passion for music and his intense personality. But it could have also been a rollercoaster ride, he has a temper and bad mood swings.

you guys could meet in different ways, maybe you were at one of his concerts and you caught his eye, or maybe you work in the music industry as a roadie, promoter, and meeting him backstage or on tour, or maybe you're also in a band and you open for his shows.

but most likely a party is where you guys would meet, he partied a lot just like any other.

yngwie would use pet names like sweetheart, love and darling, I can't really see him as a babe or baby person unless he was drunk off his ass or apologizing for something.

because this is the 80s and he was at the peak of his career and known for his intense personality and being all fiery (literally, he lit his guitar on fire on stage), i highly doubt he'd be afraid to show some pda. 

though it would be kinda rare to see him make out with you or grope you in places he knows that there will be paparazzi and stuff, but there's always that one rare picture of you two making out at a party that shows up 30 years later on pinterest LMAO.

but hed hold hands, hug, and kiss you wherever.

plus if you guys got engaged or something or just for fun, hed have a photo shoot with you (kinda boring though, it'd just be like any other photo shoot some rockstar had with their girlfriend)

now Yngwie never had a problem with drugs but was a major alcoholic  and he was quite a party animal, but when he drinks he's more loose and carefree and sometimes even goofy.

its mostly when he's sober that he acts like the guitarist version of axl rose lol.

he likes his wine, not much of a hard liquor guy. like if he were choosing a drink for himself, its definitely some kind of expensive wine or champagne, but if there was only whiskey or something wherever he is, he won't complain.

literally every interview I've seen him in he has a big ol glass of wine.

I can see you two taste testing wine, he'd just have a bunch of bottles on the table and you two would just constantly refill your glasses.

yngwie is veryyy dedicated to his work and very arrogant when it comes to playing guitar.

he doesn't let ANYBODY touch his shit like seriously, thats why he started doing solo stuff because he couldn't play with bands.

so with that he probably wouldn't let you in his studio. not like in a “no girlfriend zone” but if he's recording or just frustrated then he needs that time with no distractions (cus ur so distracting you pretty little thing rawr😍)

but if its just like a whatever day then you can be in the studio with him, hes fine with that.

and just to be a good boyfriend and make you feel included, he'd ask for your opinion but wouldn't really take it too much into consideration if you had a suggestion, but would get a little annoyed if you said you didn't like it.

arguments with him can be really intense and emotional, hes a passionate person with a temper and is known to be easily frustrated especially if he felt like he wasn't being heard or respected.

he would lash out at you and use strong language, he could be stubborn and refuse to compromise at times, which could make resolving arguments difficult.

making up after an argument would be kinda challenging, he holds grudges and is slow to forgive, he could be stubborn and take time to cool off.

However, if he did reconcile with you after an argument, it is possible that he would be passionate and sincere in expressing his apologies. He would likely be genuinely remorseful and would want to make things right again.

anyways I feel like hed really like telling you what its like in Sweden and you get to hear his Swedish accent that was still thick since he had only moved to America in ‘83.

and he'd tell you about his first band he made when he was 10, and how he would listen to queen and how he looked up to Bryan may, and how his younger brother plays drums.

he'd definitely talk about taking you to Sweden to meet his parents and older and younger brothers.

@bisexualnikkisixx