#He's a chill and kind person most of the time don't get me wrong

[hershelwidget]

working on so many projects

tag yourself i'm "swap auuu"

[chalametluvrz]

dating timothee chalamet

timothee x afab!reader (mainly gn! expect on nsfw bits)

towards the start of the relationship, i think he'd be pretty anxious

he'd often find himself messing around with his hands a lot on dates

or stumbling over his words a little too much with a small giggle

if you've ever seen old interviews of him when he was younger. you know the ones where he gets all shy and giggly? that's exactly how i envision him to be with you

after some time, that's slowly replaced with his hyperactive ass

and let me tell you, boy never shuts the fuck up that's not a bad thing

because of his schedule, he rarely gets to see you in person

so whenever he does, he just has so much to tell you and so much to talk about that he just ends up coming out with a cluster-fuck of words

he always tries to facetime you at least a couple times a week

and let me tell you, the call will always start with him saying 'oh, i missed your pretty face' or 'seeing you has made my day'

boy is madly in love

and even though he hasn't said it yet, it's fairly obvious he's not hiding anything

he's the kind of person to want to keep your relationship on the down low

because if you're also famous, he wouldn't want to cause any issues or drama through tabloids

and if you aren't, he'd feel awful dragging you into the world of hollywood

eventually though, as most celeb relationships do, you got found out

someone caught you out on your 6 months anniversary

and that was it; twitter was going mental

timothee soon figured out that he probably had to say something

but honestly, he was kind of relieved he didn't have to hide you anymore

the morning you two woke up and saw yourselves going viral on twitter, there was a bit of a mad scramble between the two of you

before eventually, timothee chilled out

'but now i don't need to hide we're together, anymore. i can let the world know you're mine.' he'd say to your confusion at his relaxed state

cute but also now all of timmy's fans are stalking your instagram

cooking meals together!!!

i have a feeling timothee's love languages are more tailored towards physical touch and acts of service tell me im wrong

so cooking together is such a beautiful thing for him

as much as timothee loves taking you out, i think he'd much prefer to cook a fancy pasta dish together with wine over that any day

he also strikes me as a cosy movie date guy

but honestly, it more than likely turns into something else

don't fight me on his, he's a horny guy

like bro would get a hard-on just snuggling with you

when you first started dating, he'd get all shy about it

he'd apologise frantically and his face would be redder than ever

after dating for some time, he'd be less phased

unless you showed and expressed discomfort with it of course

after the shock of you dating slowly weaved out of the fans

timothee would definitely start posting you on his instagram

he just needed the world to know how obsessed he is with you

arguments are rare

extremely rare

they usually only happen when timothee is stressed

feelings get heated and you end up making some snippy comments at each other before one of you gets up and leaves the room

after you've both had time to cool down, you're both mature enough to talk it out and apologise for whatever each of you or one of you has done

communication is a big thing for timmy, so i think arguments are heavily avoided because he encourages you to come to him about anything

any concerns, rants and problems you have, he wants to know

he's a flirter, let me tell you that thankfully not with others

always dazzling you with compliments

you're in the crowd at a press tour? he's staring, smirking and winking at you the whole time

you're supporting him whilst he's on set? the man can't take his eyes off you and is coming to hold you the second the shot is taken

you're on facetime? every odd sentence is him saying some suggestive comment or simply how stunning you are

the man cannot get enough of you

going back to the horny thing...

he has a high sex drive

there's absolutely no doubt about it

he is a giver!!! the man aims to please!!!

could eat you out for days

i've already made a headcanon about him eating you out so i will be brief BUT!!!

he's messy!!! the wetter the better!!!

will overstimulate you with hid tongue any day

and then make sure you cum on his cock as well

you know what they say about tall, skinny boys? wink wink

i'd say he's a good 7 inches, 7 1/2 at a push

he knows how to please you, and he's eager to learn what makes you tick

even though he's mainly a dom, i can see him being a sub at times

only on rare assurances though

being his date to things like the met gala, oscars etc

after being open about your relationship, he couldn't wait to take you everywhere and anywhere with him

loves it when you wear his clothes

but i feel like all boys do?

especially when he's away, opening up a facetime call to see you sat there in one of his t-shirts. he actually thinks his heart might implode.

this boy will actually love you with his whole heart

the cutest, softest and proudest boyfriend around fr

[annabelle--cane]

OKAY. the magnus fucking institute, manchester.

worm tracks all over the archives' floor?? hello??? this institute burnt down in '99 and archives verse jane prentiss attacked in 2016, but. that can't NOT be connected, right?

redcanary said there were no papers left, but sam and alice found some! completely rotten, but they are there. why are most of the papers gone but not all?

from her reaction to the institute being brought up in magp 02 and 05, it seems like alice didn't know about sam's history with the place before and he filled her in some time recently.

"I want to know what was happening, why they chose us… why they didn’t choose me. Maybe find the bit where everything started to go wrong." say more right now mr khalid. I saw your scores on that spreadsheet, I know you got the best grades in unethical child psych experiments. don't give up hope yet! I'm sure you still have plenty of time to become one with some kind of eldritch abomination!

beth eyre as [error]. okay, I know she was a voice in archives, but for the time being I am assuming this is not statement giver lucia wright from mag 130 with the steel chair. in the archives verse institute, the trapdoor in the archivist's office lead to the tunnels, but this institute isn't connected to old millbank prison. nevertheless, there was still a Person trapped under there. probably been there for the last 25 years. an old archivist, maybe? they're immortal, she could have just been chilling down there like the alexandrian archivist. but she also was deliberately locked in. she needed the key to get out. oops! we dug down too deep and released the Creature from below the earth!

[a-twistedheartslonging]

Could I ask for courting/relationship headcanons for my pathetic boy Idia in your AU?

Sorry, this took a while.

Man, poor OG Idia already has it hard as a cursed human, he's not the type to make the first move, even with his brother providing him with all the evidence and statistics showing him that you would accept his feelings.

But now we're adding him being a big spider with those courting and mating instincts that conflict with the guy's other anxiety-driven instincts telling him to avoid it all and that everything would go wrong and that you would tell him “Ew no, you're a gross spider that’s blue all over.” and then poke him with a stick.

Most spiders tend to be solitary creatures, they don't live in groups and only come together when it's time to find a mate. It doesn't happen all the time but it’s common for the males to get eaten after mating or even before they have the chance to when their advances are rejected. Now that is for regular spiders but there might be a chance of it if you go up to the wrong person and these guys still have those instincts telling them to be warry thanks to their ancestors. People always say “The worst that can happen is they say no.” But really there's the chance they might say “Ew no” which is way worse. Or the extra way way worse when you are a spider cuz your crush might get freaking aggressive with you and take a bite out of you. You being a little human def ease his worry about the latter, but not the former.

It's later after you guys start to hang out that he starts to be a snarky little shit, who knew such an anxious guy could have so much sass. He’s a weird combination of having issues with self-loathing while also having a big ego. It's one of those times where he starts mouthing off that you do actually try to bite him, he was legit scared for a sec but once he saw those little teeth of yours couldn’t even make a scratch on the exoskeleton on his arm, he gets super freaking smug, and now he’s even more of a shit when teasing you.

With Idia romantic feelings will develop slowly over time after becoming friends though. It's def a new feeling for him, he gives me demi-ace vibes and I think this would be the first time he had this kind of interest in a real person, it was always fictional characters before.

But also I feel like with him it could turn into him thinking these fillings are just how it feels when you have a best friend since he’s only had his brother for all those years and you're the first person outside of his family that he felt this comfortable around and when he actually does these courting behaviors its subconscious and his instincts are kicking in and his brother is actually the one to point it out.

The male of the orb weaver family (Araneidae) and some others court by rhythmically plucking the threads of a web. After the female approaches, he pats and strokes her before mating. I head canon that not only is he able to create webs but they are cool and glowy and he makes a cool hammock for you to chill in sometimes or even hang out with him on one he made for himself…and then without thinking when you're leaning against him and enjoying the soft blue floof of his legs he gives you a few gentle pats and baps with spider paw and Ortho lets out a gasp and startles him. Oh, he gets so embarrassed once Ortho starts asking him about how long he’s been courting you and how he’s so proud that he made the first move despite his anxiety. Hopefully, he does his questioning after you're out of the room.

(Oh, to be patted by one of his cute spooder paws.)

Or perhaps…he pulls a male wolf spider and ends up doing that purr after you say or do something that hits him in those feelings and oh boy, he is so embarrassed when he realizes he did it thanks to your excited reaction to hearing it. Though it hurts his ego a bit when you squeal about how cute it is…I mean…even if he didn't mean to do it, it was supposed to be sexy…still with spiders if you're rejected you either get ignored or attacked…even though he knows better, the inhuman part of his brain is telling him your positive reaction is a “yes” to getting with him which lends to him actually considering that this might actually work out and that Ortho is right. 

(Tbh I don't get why the video says it's creepy, it kind of sounds like bird sounds to me.)

Silk-wrapped gifts and offerings, expect snacks and games. Though admittedly he’s going to give you ones that he wants you to play with him. Beating a boss in co-op counts as a date…right? Right. Best believe he’s gonna be getting you hard-to-get items in game, armor, and whatever else. It’s easy to forget his rich until he gets you some decked-out gaming computer or that handheld you wanted, all wrapped in glowing blue silk of course. Actually, driders giving gifts made of their silk is very much a thing they do but Idia mostly does small simple things, expect to get really cool bracelets and hair ties infused with his scent. He gets so happy and so smug if he sees you wearing them.

I found out recently that another thing some males will do is do sort of a silk-involved message, though I think that is another thing he would do after you guys start dating and not before to...get you in the mood.

The massaging motions of the spider are officially called mate binding. Basically, the male massages the female, so that she'll allow him to mate with her, without killing him before he gets the chance. The male spider releases silk over the back of the female as he massages her. The same study also suggested that it was the feeling of the massage that soothed the female, and not the smell of the silk as some scientists suggested.

NSFW: I just found out that Darwin’s bark spiders figured out they're less likely to get eaten by ladies if they do oral. Do with that info what you may.

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

Pairing : Lee Minho x F!Reader TW : fighting ; Minho being a jerk ; angst ; fluffy at the end ; established relationship Word Count : 3.8k Request : i would like to know if you could please write something super angsty but with a fluff ending with him, could be a fight or maybe some bad things said in the heat of the moment, idk you choose, whatever you feel comfortable with. A/N : This took so long to get around to and I'm so sorry, but I finally finished it and I hope that you love it! It was a nice little change from what I've been working on right now. Thank you for loving my writing and supporting me, and I don't know if you remember saying it when you requested but you said you love me forever and always and the feeling is 100% mutual anon!!! Thank you so much!!

Things with Minho weren’t always perfect, no relationship ever was, but you liked to think that your relationship was strong enough to withstand the usual hurdles that most couples went through. For the most part, speed bumps would be smoothed over in a matter of minutes and arguments were more like the flame of a birthday candle, blown out within seconds of lighting it. You both loved each other, and that feeling was strong enough to get the both of you through even the toughest of days. You weren’t sure what was different about this time around, maybe it was the timing, or maybe it was just the fact that you both had gone through this kind of thing so many times that there was no more going around it. You both had to face it head on, and that was something that you never expected to do. 

“Where are you going?” You asked when you saw him heading to the door with a suitcase. Nothing had happened, not yet at least, and the sight in front of you had your stomach sinking. “Is something wrong? Did I do something?” He had never given you a reason to feel like you had to walk on eggshells, but seeing him this way, like he was about to walk out on you, had you beyond nervous, beyond terrified. 

“I’m not going anywhere, kitten.” He cooed, placing the bag down next to the door before walking over to you, his hands moving to your hips to hold you steady as he looked you in the eye. “We’re gonna be filming a new music video further out in the country and it’s gonna take a couple days. I’ll be staying at a hotel so I don’t have to keep driving back and forth every day. I’ll be back before you know it.” He leaned in to press a kiss to your forehead before backing up, but his words and the sentiment behind the action weren’t as reassuring as you wanted them to be. 

“Well… Why didn’t you tell me about it? I never heard about a new music video…” You said, the words coming out rather sharply, although you didn’t intend them to. “I mean… What if I didn’t catch you leaving? I’d just wake up and you’d be gone. Do you not care about how that would have made me feel?!” 

He rolled his eyes, running his fingers through his hair as he glared at you, his eyes ice cold and sending a shiver down your spine. “Sometimes I forget to tell you things, my life is kind of busy Y/N. Sue me for it. My life doesn’t exactly revolve around you.” He snapped back, and you knew that he could be kind of harsh with his words, but you didn’t know the extent of it until now, and those words had never been targeted towards you until this moment. “You’re so far up my ass anyway, I thought you would have known about the music video already considering you’re always right fucking there.” 

You swallowed thickly, a nervous chill running through you from being yelled at by the one person in your life that had never raised their voice at you at all before. You weren’t used to it, and you already felt the tears pricking your eyes as you stared at him. “I’m sorry that my way of loving you isn’t good enough, or if it’s a little too much for you. You should have let me know so that I didn’t get so attached.” You retorted, albeit far more quietly, your held back tears causing the words to come out sounding more choked off than anything. 

“Yeah, maybe I should have. And maybe I didn’t tell you about my little trip because I didn’t want you to tag along. I need my own space.” He said, and you felt your stomach tighten up, your throat closing in, and you weren’t sure how much longer you could keep yourself from crying. If you continued with the argument you’d only break down, so you stayed silent, waiting to see if he had any more left to say. You were like his verbal punching bag, and maybe he was just really stressed out right now, but he was taking it all out on you, and everything that he was saying sounded like his genuine feelings. “I’ve wasted enough time on you… I need to go.” Was the last thing he said before walking out, not a goodbye uttered by either of you, just the tension filled silence that grew and filled the space between the both of you until he walked out the front door. 

It was strange, how your mind was filled with so much, yet you couldn’t think of anything at all. You just stood there in the middle of the room, staring at the door that he had walked out of you don’t know how long ago now. Time seemed to stand still, everything was frozen, not even the sound of birds tweeting outside could be heard. It was like your entire world had stopped, and that’s when you realized that maybe he was right, what he had said wasn’t just nonsense said in a moment of anger or annoyance. It was the truth, it was the wake up call that you needed. 

You were attached to him, far too attached and it wasn’t healthy, not in the slightest. Your world shouldn’t feel like it was crumbling just because of one argument, but it did, and the walls were caving in and the floor was sinking beneath your feet and you felt like you were going to be swallowed into the nothingness that would be your life without him. You had to do the both of you a favor, you had to get out of there, you had to give him the space that he very clearly needed, a space that you didn’t know you needed as well. 

With your number dialed on his phone, his thumb hovered over the call button. You’d pick up, he knew that you would, but he was scared of what you’d say to him. He knew what he’d say to himself if he had been on the receiving end of his own words this morning. You had simply asked where he was going, and there was nothing wrong with that, he knew that. He would have felt the same sense of fear that you clearly felt if the roles were reversed. He was stressed, but that was no excuse for treating you that way, for acting the way he did. 

“Guys… can you… can you be quiet for a moment?” He called out to the rest of his members that were foolishly goofing off behind him, not a care in the world, and while their voices softened just a bit, their antics continued. He’d never be able to talk to you, not like this, at least he wouldn’t be able to be relaxed during the conversation. He needed to apologize to you, and while a face to face apology would be better, a phone call was all that he was able to give you right now, and for that, he felt even worse. 

His thumb pressed against the green button and he quickly brought the phone up to his ear, awaiting and expecting to hear your voice after the first ring. But the first ring came and went, leading into the second, and then the third, and it was so rare for such a thing to happen that he assumed he had just dialed the wrong number. 

Now, something like that wasn’t likely to happen, not with him. Your number had been etched into his mind since the day he had gotten it from you, the dialing of the digits a muscle memory now. He had to find a reason for the lack of an answer though, and the only reason he could come up with was that maybe his finger had slipped, it had slipped just enough to press a wrong number, and that’s why your voice hadn’t come through his speaker to reassure him and calm his nerves. 

He pressed out the numbers once more, slowly this time, focusing on his screen and reading back the digits at the top once they were all there just to make sure he was right this time around. “Come on…” He mumbled to himself as he heard the first ring sound out, fading off into silence just to be followed by the second ring. This never happened, you never ignored him, you always had your phone close enough to you to hear the special ringtone that you had given to just him. This had to mean that something was wrong, something happened, and his own stomach sank at the possibility, all of the things that could have happened. “I have to go guys.” He said, his words short as he walked right past them, not even bothering to give them an explanation as they all tried to follow behind him. He didn’t have time for explanations right now, but once he was sure that you were okay he’d tell them what had happened. You were his top priority right now, you were top priority always, no matter where he was or what he was doing, you were always number 1 in his mind. 

His phone sat in the center console of the car as he started the drive back home, his eyes glancing down at it every couple seconds just to check if you were calling him back or if you had texted him to let him know that you had just been busy in the shower or something. Anything, he would have taken anything over the silence that he was receiving right now, and the longer it lasted the more worried he got. The little argument that the two of you had earlier that morning seemed like nothing to him, it didn’t even cross his mind that you’d be upset about it because he just assumed that you would know that he meant none of the words that came out of his mouth. There was just so much going on, the words were meaningless, and at the end of the day, he absolutely adored you, he loves you, you knew that. 

The set for the music video was 2 hours away, and that was if there was no traffic at all, but of course, he had the luck of running into rush hour, and he had been stopped at every single red light, turning what would have been a 2 hour car ride into almost 4 hours and in that duration of time he had heard nothing from you, he hadn’t heard from you at all and by the time he pulled up to the apartment he was on the verge of having a full fledged panic attack. 

His keys were almost left in the ignition of the car in his rush to get inside, and the only reason he remembered to grab them was because he needed to unlock the front door to get to you. No matter how fast he tried to move, it felt like his feet wouldn’t carry him any faster than the speed of a snail, and maybe it was some kind of internal hesitation, a fear that what would be on the other side of the door once he opened it, or better you, what might not be there. 

“Y/N!” He called out your name, practically screaming it as he pushed the door open, the sound of the doorknob slamming against the wall breaking the silence of the shared home. As he looked around, everything seemed far too still, as if nothing had been touched, no one had moved inside these four walls for hours, and his breaths became faster as he stepped further into the apartment. It was quiet, too quiet, and he could only describe what he felt right now as being at the top of a 20 story building and standing on the edge looking straight down. 

It was like he was frozen in the center of the room now, trying to find any sign of life, any sign of you being there, and he thought, maybe if he looked around enough, maybe if he did a couple double takes something would come up, but all he was met with was nothing. There was no heat that clung to the LCD screen of the television after having been on for a little bit too long. There was no scent of laundry detergent in the air that would alert him that you had clothes going. The hum of the dishwasher wasn’t heard as it usually would be when he came home, and there was no sound of water running through pipes that would indicate you were in the shower. Everything about the house right now felt empty. 

Why did an empty house feel so claustrophobic? The walls were closing in on him, he couldn’t breathe and all he wanted was to push them back, and the only thing that would allow him to take a deep breath was finally seeing you. Where were you? If you had only gone out for groceries, the house wouldn’t feel like this. There was some sort of resting stillness, a sense of finality in the emptiness, it felt like it would be like this forever, and he didn’t understand why. 

He hadn’t stepped any further into the home, dread filling every bone and taking over every fiber of his being at the mere thought of taking another step. Was it a good thing that he hadn’t? The doorknob jiggled and the sound of keys rattling on the other side had his head whipping around to see you walking in. “Minho…” You whispered his name, freezing in the doorframe. Your arms and your hands were empty, you hadn’t gone grocery shopping… So where have you been? “I didn’t think you’d be here. I’m sorry…” Why were you apologizing? “I just forgot a few things… I’ll be out soon.” Your tone was hushed as you made a move to step past him, but his arm instinctively reached out to grab you, to feel your skin against the palm of his hands, to stop you from walking away from him. 

“What do you mean you’ll be out soon? Where are you going?” His tone was hushed as he looked at you, but you didn’t even meet his eyes, staring down at the floor as if you didn’t want to see him. “You didn’t answer your phone, you didn’t text me… What’s going on? Is something wrong, did something happen?” There was a soft sound that came through your lips, and it sounded like a scoff, but he couldn’t be quite sure. You were acting so distant, it scared him, you had never been like this before. 

“I was just trying to give you what you needed…” You mumbled, and he could hear it in your voice, in your tone, in every syllable of every word that he couldn’t seem to understand the meaning of. You had been crying, you were devastated, and the only thing that he could manage to get out of the vague sentence was that it had been his fault. 

You tried to pull away from him, but he didn’t want to let you go, he couldn’t, not until he knew that things were okay. If he let go now, he was scared that you’d walk away from him, walk out on him, and he knew that his heart wouldn’t be able to handle that. “What do you mean…? I need you. I don’t know where this is coming from, love… I just… I know that we had that little spat this morning but… It was nothing.” 

At his words, your eyes finally lifted from the floor, the whites of them reddened and the skin underneath puffy and raw. “It was… nothing?” You repeated his words questioningly, and although you weren’t looking directly at him, he could see your eyes waver as you looked around the room. “Was it nothing because… you didn’t get hurt? Because you got to walk out after completely breaking me down and making me feel like shit? You make me feel like my love isn’t good enough, or that it’s way too much… And then you get to just come back in here and say that it was nothing?” 

Clearly what he had thought to be a little spat had been so much more to you, and while the both of you usually didn’t like to dwell on arguments, this one had stuck with you, it had bothered you enough to the point that you were seemingly on the verge of walking out, of leaving him. “I-...” Where was he going to go with that sentence? He didn’t even know, but he was so scared, so so scared that you’d try to pull away again, that it would be the last time you’d ever pull away from him. “I was stressed… I didn’t mean any of that, you know I didn’t… You don’t really think that I think of you like that, do you?” 

But surely you did… Because if you didn’t, you wouldn’t be acting this way… You wouldn’t be so upset… “You’re the only one who gets stressed… Sure, we’ll go with that.” You mumbled, letting your arm drop limply, aware now that he wasn’t going to let go of you, not that easily at least. “You said you wanted space, and that’s what I’m giving you. If you’re so stressed… If that’s what made you say that, then I don’t want to be around you anyway.” 

What was he supposed to even say now? You were using his words against him, words that he had tried all morning to forget that he had said, but you didn’t forget, you never did. His eyes squeezed shut as if the answers to his question would appear on the insides of his eyelids, but all he saw was darkness, which was exactly what his life would be without you in it if he didn’t fix things. “I’m not… I don’t want space. I want you here with me, I want you to cling to me, I need it.” He was breathless, his breaths coming heavily as if he had just ran a marathon, and he was surely sweating as though he had as well. There was nothing more stressful than what he was going through right now. 

“Why? So you can go right back out the door again and leave me here feeling more confused than I was this morning?” You shook your head, but he mirrored the action only double the speed as his eyes went wide, pulling you closer to him until your chest was pressed against his, and his forehead resting against yours. “Minho…” You gasped out his name in one short breath, all others that were supposed to follow were held in your lungs. 

“If I walk out that door again… I don’t want to do it alone. I want you right beside me, love.” He quickly spoke, feeling as though time were slipping from his hands the longer he made you wait, he needed to speak fast, he needed to get all of his feelings out so that you knew he was being serious. “I want you to come with me to the shoot, I want you to be there to watch us film, I want to feel your eyes on me the entire time.” 

You gnawed on your bottom lip, your eyes staring down at the faded pattern of his t-shirt that had been through the wash way too many times. “What if I don’t want to…? What if I need space?” You quizzed and his heart felt constricted, his breaths sharper now as he thought and assumed a deeper meaning to your words. Why would you say that? Did you just want space so that he could come back home and you not be there? What was the reason behind it? 

“No.” He said flatly, causing your head to pull back so you could look up at him with narrowed eyes. He didn’t mean to sound so short with you, but it was the only word he could think to say when everything felt like it was being stacked against him. “Please… I’m sorry…” He wasn’t the type of person that wore his heart on his sleeve, not at all, and his emotions were usually bottled up quite well, but right now it felt like the bottle had been shaken and it was bubbling over, making a mess of the table and the floors. “If you… If you need space, fine… But come with me. You can have space… I just don’t want to leave you, I don’t want to be away from you. Please…” 

Begging definitely wasn’t his thing, but he’d be damned if he lost you because his pride was too high. He was willing to do anything to make things right, especially since it had been his words that had messed things up in the first place. He had made the mess and it was his job to clean it up. “You’re so confusing, Minho…” You sighed, letting your head drop back down against his chest as his hand came up to pet through your hair. 

“I know, I’m gonna work on that, I promise.” His chest vibrated, but what you assumed to be laughter that you weakly chuckled along with were the stuttered breaths that he had been holding for so long it felt like his lungs would burst. “I love you, and I need you, I’ll always feel that way. If I ever say anything stupid like that again just… call me an idiot and throw a pillow at me or something. I don’t ever want you to feel like your love is too much… I need it. I’ll die without it.” 

You scoffed as you lightly pushed him back, crinkling your nose at him. “You’re so dramatic. You’ve been hanging with Hyunjin a little too much, haven’t you?” You teased, but he couldn’t even pretend to be annoyed with the comment, he was just happy to see you playing around, to see your smile again, to know that you weren’t going to leave him. 

The two of you belonged together, he felt it in his bones, in his heart and in his soul. There was no one else in this world that he’d rather be with, and if it wasn’t you, he wouldn’t settle for anyone else. He needed you, that much was the honest truth, and while he wouldn’t actually die without you, he’d be much better off that way if he didn’t have you. You were his, and sure, you were attached to him, but he was attached to you, and that’s simply because he wouldn’t be himself without you, and you wouldn’t be you without him. You were each others better halves, and that’s how it always was, how it always will be.

[the-s1lly-corner]

CRP characters crushing on the reader 2/2

Placeholder opening here, check part 1 for the other characters! i dont usually write for zalgo because my take on him is... so... yeah... and hard to write for him, but the idea of this intangible godlike entity that can warp realities falling for someone is horrifying

Characters: Jane, Jeff, Ticci Toby, Nina, Bloody Painter, Zalgo

Notes: reader is GN but post mainly focuses on the canon characters, admin uses any pronouns for nina so if you see the pronouns swapping that's why!, heavy hcs for Zalgo and his part isnt really open for "it gets better and you guys get together" no his part is just... horrifying

CWs: zalgo is zalgo; ie non human entity does not follow human morals and is kind of... toxic and horrifying

JANE

I need you guys to bare with me because this blog has always been hc/au heavy with how I write characters but between all the main crps, Jane is probably the most likely to just.. be a normal person 90% of the time, so the chances of you and her meeting during a normal day is pretty high. She's closed off so you don't even notice that there's feelings developing on her end. If there is a difference it's just her being slightly more affectionate and open to you. She becomes even more protective of you, can you blame her? You've heard of the rumors about her family... She doesn't deny her feelings if you ask her, though, so it's a clean confession when the time comes instead of it just being spilled or forced out.

JEFF

He's so full of himself that he approaches you without thinking anything through because he's so confident that you're going to just fall for him. Makes a lot of jokes with you, some darker than others. Flirts with you up front because once more, he's so confident that you're into him that he doesn't take a moment to consider that you would reject him. Probably takes rejection the worst, at least out of the characters on this list. And that's on being on the run since your mid teen years, he didn't interact with many people because of that. "Oh you dig me" as you slap his arm because he said something dumb.

TICCI TOBY

Very similar to the other proxies, watches you from afar but he decides to interact with you sooner than the other two. He's wary, because he doesn't want to humiliate himself or screw anything up but he's so so so desperate to meet someone new who's in his age range so he's doing his best to appeal to you. Sometimes slips up because he's trying too hard. He can pester you and get on your nerves, but he doesn't mean anything wrong by it... usually.. You outright ask him if he has a crush on you and you can see him internally scrambling for something to say. It's actually a little sweet. Probably the most normal out of them all asides Jane, at least by Creepypasta standards.

NINA

Oh she is so upfront about her feelings for you! Makes you small trinkets and keepsakes with random stuff she finds. Very quick to approach you as well and make a friendship. Very chill if you don't end up returning their feelings, and more than happy to keep up a friendship with you if you want that. A yapper, too, so they have a habit of keeping you by keeping a conversation up and alive longer than others would. Custom kandi for you as well, with your favorite colors and some stuff they know you like! As an aside, Nina is a "cringe fandom enjoyer", so you guys can get into the same things and be cringe and free together! Not related to this post but have it as a bonus!

BLOODY PAINTER

He finds himself drawing you more than he draws his other subjects, and honestly its a little frustrating. You start finding some of his papers laying around. He approaches you so he can try to get even more accurate with his art, having the real thing as a reference is much better than relying off of memories of you wandering around town. Once the initial tenseness dies down, you might be able to get a few words out of him while he's drawing. "Muse of an artist" trope, a lot of the things he makes are dedicated to you in one way or another. His art is the only real tip that there's something going on, because otherwise he's good about swallowing and hiding his emotions.

ZALGO

Bonus character, Zalgo would literally alter the universe if he could to ensure that you're there and his. He can manipulate media, and create creatures.. I mean in my au he's literally the reason half the creepypastas exist... I WAS going to make a joke that he makes a stand in to act for him, but he's so into you that he can't stand the idea of someone else being with you... doesnt matter if he was living vicariously through it. Genuine psychological horror elements here with him warping the world around you in an attempt to get your attention and to get you to come to him. Technical cosmic / otherworldly horror (?) because he's something that transcends just about everything in universe. Simultaneously everywhere at anytime all the time, there is no real way to get away from him. Horrifying stuff.

[heartsforvenus]

supernova ⛥

robin buckley x fem reader

summary- you and robin are newfound friends, but you wish you were something more. little did you know, so did she. you were both too afraid of admitting your own feelings

tags- song fic 'red wine supernova' by chappell roan, fluff, kind of angst, 'one-sided' pining, sex references, mention of drinking, the joys of a first homoerotic friendship

lowercase intended

this is lowkey trash and all over the place, but i had the idea and thought it was cute. hope you enjoy my first fic <3

i'm in the hallway waiting for ya, mini skirt and my go-go boots

"we're gonna be late!" you exclaimed, standing outside of robin's bedroom.

you had recently befriended robin buckley, one of the band geeks of hawkins high, and somehow convinced her to go to a party thrown by tommy h. not only is she your new friend, she is also your longtime crush, but that was a secret between you and your diary.

that led you to this moment, where you were standing in the hallway outside of robin's bedroom waiting for her to get ready and contemplating your life actions. robin did say that you could stay in her room while she changed, yet you knew yourself better than that. even if you were turned around and forcing your attention on the most mundane object in her room, you were sure to die of embarrassment, thinking about her bare body standing mere feet away from you.

"would you chill out? i'm getting ready for a party i didn't even want to go to, nor was i invited to for that matter," she reminded you and you leaned your head on the wall behind you.

"half the people at those parties weren't invited, he's not gonna point out you in particular," you told her and you saw her head pop out of the door.

"i look like a fucking idiot and i can't zip up this dress. let's just not go," robin decided. your body was on autopilot when you turned the corner into her room and grabbed her arm. the touch of her soft skin against your own was almost enough to make you forget what you were even doing, as she stared at you waiting for you to say something.

"let me zip it for you." your voice came out in almost a whisper as you were still kind of stunned from the previous interaction. and don't get me wrong, the two of you have touched each other before, even held hands, but you weren't sure if you would ever get over this phase.

"fine. but don't break it. maybe i can return it after tonight," robin thought aloud, which made you frown.

i just want you to make a move, so slow down, sit down, it's new

"robin, you look... i mean, this dress... it's so nice."

you mentally facepalmed at yourself. obviously she looked beautiful. this was not the first time you chickened out on complimenting her and it surely wouldn't be the last. you were honestly just saving yourself from the inevitable embarrassment. you couldn't handle the 'i only see you as a friend' from robin, that would just be the point where you would genuinely hope the ground would swallow you whole. or that you'd get hit by a car. or that the world would end.

"thanks, you can have it if you want it. it would probably look better on you anyway," robin commented, and you could feel the all too familiar feeling of warmth rising to your face.

"no..." you shook your head. you wanted to tell her that the dress looked like it was made personally for her. it showed off all her curves in a way that wasn't too revealing, but it was just enough to catch your eye as you glanced over her body in a manner that was not as discreet as you hoped.

in an attempt to change the subject, you yet again grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her out of the room.

"let's go before all the attendees get too bored and start having sex in every room," you suggested. her lack of resistance was a shock as she willingly let you drag her out of the house.

"now, how are we even getting there? if you plan on drunk driving me home then you're even worse of an influence than i thought," robin wondered, leaning back on the hood of your car.

"i was just thinking we could walk. it's not too far from here." robin groaned at your suggestion before standing up straight.

"fine, but you can carry me on the way back," robin agreed.

i just wanna get to know ya, guess i didn't quite think it through

once the two of you made it to the party, you began drinking whatever anyone would hand you in a red solo cup. you guys were stuck inside of your own bubble, accidentally ignoring everyone around you to just speak to each other. you each spoke about your families and your deepest fears, but there was always that one thing on the tip of your tongue that you couldn't force out.

not here, you'd tell yourself, someone might hear and then everyone will know.

as if she could read your mind, robin narrowed her eyes and asked, "what's on your mind?"

"oh, it's nothing," you promised her, not realizing your dilemma was so evident on your face. or maybe she could just read you that well already.

"right... well i just told you about how i literally peed my pants a year ago, so i think we can talk about anything." her blue eyes pierced into your soul, and you so badly wanted to tell her what you were thinking about. another day.

"i was just thinking about how embarrassing it is to pee your pants," you lied and she giggled, that giggle that would've had you weak in the knees had you been standing.

"okay, you jerk, i'm sure you've done embarrassing things too." she pushed your shoulder lightly.

"not yet," you told her. she shook her head, wondering why you were such an enigma, and why it always felt like there was something you weren't telling her. for a moment you snapped out of your bubble to notice everyone around you was either making out or passed out, just as you had predicted. "maybe we should take this as our cue to leave."

this caused robin to notice her surroundings for the first time and jokingly gag, which caught the attention of one of the girls who was kissing some guy. she just glared back at her, and robin jumped up.

"yeah, let's go before this girl beats the shit out of me," robin, wide eyed, agreed. the two of you clumsily rushed out of the front door, passing more and more couples until you finally made it out into the night.

there was a breeze in the air, but it wasn't too cold. you hoped that robin wasn't cold, because you didn't bring a jacket to offer her. she hoped the same about you.

fell in love with the thought of you, now i'm choked up, face down, burnt out

now, you were laying next to her in her bed. wearing her spare pjs, literally surrounded by her scent. you couldn't sleep, because you were thinking about the girl beside you, as you often did in the middle of the night. usually in your own bed, though, so being near her was making it much worse. you had half a mind to just leave, but you didn't know if you'd ever have the opportunity to sleep in her bed ever again. you certainly wouldn't once she found out what you were, or so you thought.

you felt her shuffle closer to you, and you tensed up. she had been jerking about the bed the whole time, but you didn't expect her to unconsciously move closer to you.

god, you had it worse than you thought.

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Round 3

Propaganda

Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

#Propaganda for Glenn Close: one of the other PCs mentions multiple times how hot he is #Actually several characters point it out but especially Henry #Also the only person in a podcast that has to put a disclaimer about not being a BDSM podcast to have had sex during the course of the show

PLEASASSWEEPLEASE TOU DONT HUNRERFSTABDS

GLENN GLENN GLENN ITS GLENN VOTE GLENN VOTE FOR THE BOY

We didn’t do hot Glenn summer for him to LOSE. Spoilers for his story but MORE PROPAGANDA FOR YOU:

Young hot rocker dilf

Loyal to his dead wife <3

Does in fact smoke weed

BARD!! HES A BARD. HE WAS LEAD GUITAR IN HIS BAND (that he was kicked out of)

His band was a Christmas cover band btw.

Literally the fandom had hot Glenn summer which consisted of drawing him being incredibly hot and sexy

Anti government (ofc)

Kind of cringefail (Disney adult) (was on dilfs of disneyland)

Young and sexy not your style? Then how about HIM AFTER YEARS LOCKED IN A TIME PRISON WITH A DAMN HANNIBAL MASK ??

Lost an eye and wears a fucking eyepatch

One incredibly buff arm

Has a pet rat named after his son <3

Immeasurable amounts of trauma in this man- becomes progressively more unhinged

OH OLD HUMAN BARD ISNT CUTTING IT? FINE

HE BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON

A COOL HOT ONE-EYED DEMON WHO WANTS TO KILL HIS DAD (also sexy)

HE CANONICALLY ENDS CHRISTIAN HELL VIA CHRISTMAS

IS ALSO WAY OVERLEVELED

Becomes a demon hunter for the rest of his existence

Also nonwhite !!! We are done with cringefail whiteboys !!!!!!!!!

I can’t put into words ok just know he is the best plz love him.

GLENN GLENNNNNN

Listen, I don't know this other character but I've seem some good arguments for her However Consider Glenn Close winning through no effort of his own in a bullshit way despite being a dick is the most in character thing ever. He leveled up three times and got a crab mech, we GOT to give him this win, it's fitting

I haven't dedicated the last 2 months of my life drawing Glenn close for him to lose

Vote for Glenn Close or I will make you read the parody I did of the vaporeon copypasta

I don’t regulate if minors follow me or not bc I’m a pretty chill space but I hope the world is aware that’s the only reason I haven’t been downright nasty about Glenn close. I’m down bad. I’m NOT in the boat of ‘Glenn isn’t sexy but I want him to win bc it’s my fandom’. I would estimate I have 200+ drawings of Glenn on my phone that AREN’T safe for work. Way more that are. Where did they come from? That’s MY business. But I tell you this fact to assure you- Glenn IS sexy. I’m not voting to represent my fandom I’m voting out of TRUTH AND LOVE. IF YOU DON’T GET IT YOU DON’T GET IT!!! I just think my level of feral over this man is more powerful than y’all realize. If you don’t get his sex appeal that’s okay, but don’t doubt that this is my truth.

VOTE GLENN

Glenn fuckers fought tooth and nail to get us here from like 38% dawg we DESERVE THIS. GLENN IS THE SEXIEST MAN!!! HE WAS THE FIRST FICTIONAL CHARACTER I FOUND HOT AND HE’S GONNA CONTINUE TO SWEEP!!! Your hot goat woman sounds sexy don’t get me wrong but I’m forever fighting for the man that changed my brain chemistry. Proud of our fandom tbh. I don’t think y’all understand the sheer amount of effort I have put in to get my boy where he is today but this placement feels well earned. TO GLENN SWEEP!!

THE FUCK YOU MEAN GLENN CLOSE ISNT WINNING IM BOUT TO THROW HANDS FR

Okay but Glenn made a minivan cum by talking to her so

Yalll better vote glenn i swear to god

Vote Glenn or else the bird gets it🐦🛸

HOW IS MY DUDE NOT WINNING????

GLEN GELN NELG GLENNANN HE DESERVS ITTTT

HE HAS A BOOK THAT HE MARKS X’S AND CHECKS FOR EVERY DAY TO SEE IF THAT DAY WAS A SUCCESS OR NOT. TO SEE IF HE DID GOOD THAT DAY. ITS ALMOST ENTIRELY X’S. HE WAS CUCKED OUT OF A SON. AND A DEAD WIFE. HE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO KILL HIS DAD IN REVENGE. There’s absolutely nothing going for him except his sex appeal in his life. Nobody he loved remembers him. He lost his eye. All he has is a pet rat and friends who admit they don’t really like him that much. He was kicked out of his own band. The band was named after him. He was kicked out of the Glenn Close trio. All he could do was deez nuts the big bad and be sexy. If nothing else, then pity him. Look in his eyes. Look at his heart and soul. Do you think pickman needs this to feel good about herself? Can she not accept a loss for the sake of a pathetic father? Can she shake hands with the minivan fucker and his human gun and just take the L on this one? He did not do the BDSM episode for this I’ll tell you what. Do this for my his sake. Do it for Nick Jr, who needs the prize money to pay for his rat snacks. Do it for his son. For Morgan. Ganbatte.

Mod Note: While I will still take "bad dads are sexy" propaganda and "bad dads aren't sexy" anti-propaganda, I kindly request no more discussion on whether or not he was a bad father. This is a sexypoll, not a parentingpoll. If you see a post you strongly disagree with, you can just not reblog it.

Taako (The Adventure Zone: Balance):

A celebrity chef from another plane

[starcrossedyanderes]

Snake Secrets

Summary: Tom finds out about your secret pet. And you find out one of his many secrets, as well

Word Count: 1.6k

A/N: Behold, a fanfiction literally nobody was expecting! Expect more, because boy do I have Tom brainrot!

It was an awfully cold day in Hogwarts. The landscape was as white as Headmaster Dippet's hair. In other words, it was the perfect time to cuddle up by the fire with your pair of warmest socks. Oh, and of course a cup of hot cocoa.

The green flames waved in the nonexistent wind as you sat down intently with a book you borrowed from the restricted section. A book that was entirely in runes and required a complete translation.

It was when you stood up to head to your room that you noticed something was terribly wrong.

There was something absent from your robes.

The grass snake you had taken in as your pet, was missing.

The reptile was rescued by you a couple of weeks ago after you found it in the snow. The poor thing wasn't even in torpor and was clearly not doing well. But you being the kind person you are (and being Slytherin giving you a soft spot for snakes) you brought it inside and helped it get a few mice in its tummy.

So far the snake has seemed to be rather taken with you as he simply chills out with you and has never shown you any hostility. You have taken to calling it Theo.

Because of today's extra chill, you decided to help Theo warm up by sitting next to the fire while snuggled up in your robes. But the serpent is nowhere to be seen.

Now, this is bad for many reasons. For one, it is terribly cold out for a snake. Secondly, you're fairly certain snakes aren't allowed as pets and the poor thing will probably be killed. And thirdly, you know Parkinson's cat is strutting around somewhere and you know she would just love a fresh kill.

You rush off in a frenzy all around the Slytherin dorms. Is he by the fireplace? No. Did he make his way back to your dorm? Also no. You searched the Slytherin house from top to bottom with no luck.

It is to your horror that you realize the snake must have gotten out of the dorms. You hurry out of the common room into the dreary dungeons and almost speed past the paintings, before stopping in your tracks. Perhaps the paintings saw something?

"Excuse me, sir by chance did you see a snake er.. slither by?"

The elderly, stern woman looked your way.

"Yes, the dreadful thing went down the hall and into the fifth room on the left. Fairly certain it followed that prefect boy."

You raised your eyebrows at this. Why would Theo follow a prefect? And who did he follow?

You bowed and expressed your thanks before racing to the specified location.

~TOM'S POV~

How I manage to forget how unbearable people are, I may never know. Most of the Slytherins had decided to stay in the commons today to stay warm during this frigid day, meaning I could get no peace and true studying in. Thankfully, there was a study room not too far from the dorm that few knew about.

It was as I was getting my books out that I heard a voice behind me. It would seem I was followed.

"Excuse me."

I turned around, ready to deal with the interloper but nobody was to be seen.

What sort of idiot asks for me while under an invisibility potion?

Before I could speak my thoughts I was interrupted by another,

"Excuse me, sir."

It wasn't until my eyes drifted down that I realized who had interrupted my study session.

On the floor was a medium-sized snake with some brown scales, and it was looking expectantly at me. Seems this grass snake luckily stumbled upon the one person in this school who could understand him.

"Yes, what is it, snake?"

The snake slithered closer and it seemed to get the closest thing a snake could to a sparkle in its eye.

"Oh, sir, please help me. You are the only person here who can understand me."

"Well, yes, I am the only heir of Slytherin, after all."

"Oh wow! A celebrity! Please, it would seem I have gotten lost."

"I would say. Don't you know it's Winter? This school makes for an awful place to be a snake, with how many owls there are."

"Oh, you see I was rescued by this awfully nice lady from the snow. She took me in and gave me some tasty mice. She even helped me stay warm and gave me a name! But I caught a whiff of a rat and the next thing I know I'm here! I would like to make my way back to her, I'm sure she's worried sick."

"Yes, that would be quite a predicament. I suppose I could direct you back to her. Now do you know anything about her? Such as her house?"

"Oh, thank you, sir! I don't know terribly much but where she resides couldn't be terribly far from here. Oh, and there's green everywhere in her den."

I hummed at the thought.

"A Slytherin taking in an animal. Now you hear something new every day. Fine then, you may follow me back to the Slytherin commons but you'll have to find her from there yourself."

But it would seem I have to put a pin in that plan as another person opened the door.

~YOUR POV~

I was about to open the door to the study room before I heard something quite odd. It sounded like a set of hisses.

Theo!

Theo must be behind this door!

But I stopped again as another set of hisses came through, and a very different set at that. Was there another snake in there?

Well, if Theo made a friend you were more than happy to meet them. For now, you just wanted to know he was ok. So you bit the bullet and opened the door.

What you found was not quite what you were expecting. Thinking back on it, maybe you should have from what the painting told you.

In this study room stood Tom Riddle, with your Theo on his shoulder. It would seem Tom was the prefect Theo followed, and Tom most certainly found out.

"Oh, Tom. I see you found.. a snake."

Your attempt at keeping the fact that the snake was yours was completely shattered as Theo immediately slithered over to you and started to make his way to your shoulder; acting like your very own scarf.

Tom merely raised his eyebrow.

"Is this your snake?"

You gulped.

"Oh, yes. I know snakes are generally frowned upon here but I just couldn't let him die in the cold. Please don't tell anyone, Riddle. I swear I'll let him outside as soon as it's safe."

Riddle merely hummed at your proposition but your mouth just had to open again.

"Oh, by the way, is there another snake here?"

Tom smirked.

"No, why do you have another snake on the loose I should know of?"

"Oh, no. I'm just fairly sure I heard another snake in her-"

Wait a sec. It was just you, Tom, and Theo in this room. No other snakes.

Now that you think about it, the only person who could have possibly made another set of hisses could be Tom, but he obviously can't talk to snakes.

Unless of course, he can.

Riddle always did have a way with all academics and had gained quite a following amongst a group of purebloods, despite his 'mudblood' status. Although if you recall correctly he did come from an orphanage.

Could it be?

And of course, Tom seemed to know exactly what you were thinking.

Your face blanched.

"Well I should be going-"

You heard the click of a lock.

"Why, (L/N)? We just started talking."

You gulped as you turned back to face him.

"I suppose the snake is out of the bag now, isn't it Theo? Now what should I do with you? I can't have anyone blabbing their mouths about this now, can I? But luckily for you, I have quite a soft spot for snakes. Besides someone as sweet as you are probably going through enough, being a Hufflepuff disguised as a Slytherin and all."

He had made you back up to the point you almost fell in a chair.

But despite the situation you couldn't help but slightly flare up.

"Hey, I'm as much of a Slytherin, besides you I suppose, as anyone else in this house. Just because I showed a bit of kindness does not make me any less ambitious and cunning. Besides, I think me being kind to a snake is enough proof as any."

For whatever reason he reached out and barely touched your hair with a hiss and Theo decided to slither up his hand.

"You know, Theo is awfully fond of you. It would be awfully mean to separate the two of you, especially during Winter and all."

Your eyes widened.

"Tom, can I call you that, I swear I won't tell a soul. I respect secrets, I just ask you not to tell anyone about Theo. If you don't tell, I swear my lips are sealed. I'll even make a vow."

Tom waves his hand and you hear the door behind you unlocked.

"That won't be necessary, (Y/N). This just gives me more of an excuse to keep an eye on you now. Be sure no one else sees him on the way back. Surely they will not be nearly as fond as I am of you."

[baratiddyappreciator]

Hey honey bun sugar plummmm!! Could I get a baki characters with a s/o who has a fat ass (me)

Why of course, thine blessed thiccness will be appreciated!

Baki:

He's more of a tits guy (mommy issues, we all know this) but he absolutely doesn't complain about a bit more cake either. Be it a bubble butt or just genuine cake, he does not mind in the slightest.

That is his ass, thank you very much, so catching others staring or trying to cop a feel will very much wind up in him dishing out swift justice. He's chill about most things, and he doesn't mind others appreciating you as a whole, you're stunning, he knows it, but when they're being gross and pushy about it, that's when he'll step in.

He's got a habit of grabbing people's hips when he walks passed them, he may or may not cop a slight feel with you though. He doesn't mean it to be creepy or pervy, but he can't help but admire the curves you graced him with.

He's got his own cake as well, don't forget that, so the two of you walking side by side out in public earns a lot of stares for many reasons, but the fact that the two of you combined are an entire bakery might also have something to do with it.

Kozue:

Girl is flustered. Literally everyone around Baki that she ever met was cheeked up, and she knows how to appreciate a good behind, but she's a lot more shy about it than, say, Chiharu or Katsumi.

Worried about wardrobe malfunctions? Not while she's around, she is on it. Doing it to be considerate? Absolutely, of course. But was she also watching your ass before the wardrobe failure? Maybe. Perhaps. Perchance, even.

She's the kind of person to look through clothes online and show her friends when she finds things that she thinks would suit them or that they would like, so if you mention wanting something to accentuate your butt a bit, she'll pull out an entire folder.

Lord help her if she catches you in swimsuits, she won't know what to do with herself. Does she admire openly? Does she touch? Please help her lmao.

Hanayama:

Firm ass admirer, but in private. Only he is allowed to admire your ass, that's final. You don't get to stand while he's sitting down, he'll pull you straight into his lap and keep those big meaty hands on your waist, trapping you in place. You don't get up until he lets you.

He won't spank you, but he will give you light taps every once in a while. Just know: he absolutely wants to wind up and slap the soul out of you, but he won't because he doesn't want to hurt you.

You wanna wear clothes that accentuate your butt? It had better only be for his eyes, he's not going to tolerate other people looking at your buns, those are his to admire.

There will be times where he just lays down with you, acts super sweet and everything, and then just grabs your ass. For no reason. It's like watching a cat stare at something on the edge of a table before they knock it off.

Admires your ass while clothed, and while naked. You aren't safe from him, even if you're sitting down, because no matter how strong or heavy you might think you are, you are nothing compared to his strength.

Chiharu:

A menace. He will walk up to you and smack your ass so gotdamn hard that you just won't know what to do beyond pass away on the spot. He sees nothing wrong with it, and he will continue to do this. There's no rhyme or reason either.

Are you getting nasty with him? Don't let him near your ass, because he will bite you, it will hurt, and you can't even get mad at him because he does it out of sheer love.

Steal his pants. I'm serious, steal them. Just walk out with them on, he'll practically break his own neck doing a double-take. They look great on you, and they're incredibly comfortable. It's a win-win!

Feel free to torment him by returning the favour by the way, he knows he can be a bit much, but he can take what he dishes out and more.

Katsumi:

Problem child. He'll use any excuse he can to get at you in general, he's very touchy. That being said, we have seen how efficient this man is at slapping things. He slaps you once and it's over. He slaps your butt and you're going to need ice.

He's also the kinda guy to bite your butt, for no reason. Fresh out the shower? Chomp. Trying to relax in shorts? Chomp. He doesn't even try to explain or justify it, he just does it.

Much like Chiharu, you can return the favour. Unlike Chiharu, he's going to play up every little bit of his response. Did you slap him back? Oh he's going to moan and whine, and by the time you get him to shut up, you're both laughing so hard neither of you can breathe.

He will try and get you into a karate uniform from the Dojo. Is it for personal reasons? Mayhaps. He thinks that it'll look good on you either way, either way he'll get a nice look at his precious in a karate uniform.

Jack:

I don't want to say that he doesn't care, but he just doesn't make a big deal about it. He thinks you're stunning and perfect just the way you are. Does he appreciate a bit more to hold onto? Sure thing! Is he going to start grabbing at you randomly? Not really, no.

Does he occasionally admire? Oh absolutely, he managed to bag you, he's going to admire you every chance he gets. He's a bit dense, but he's not blind.

That being said, if you dress up all nice for him, all of what I've previously said goes straight out the window. He is LOOKING (respectfully) and he is going to be touching, mentally prepare for that fact, because once he starts he's not going to stop for a while.

Lord help anyone that dares to even think of copping a feel or admiring while he's around. He may be pretty, but this man is a solid 8ft tall and has a natural glare that could kill an army.

Kosho:

Also doesn't make a big deal out of it, but you know that he loves ass just by looking at him. He'll admire, he'll touch, and if you're laying on your stomach, he'll use the booty as a pillow in a rare moment of relaxation.

If you really want to drive him wild (re: insane) then wear some tights around the house. He's going to behave himself, he swears, but if you bend over one more time he cannot be held responsible for what he's about to do.

Which is to say that he'll slap the soul out of you and then drag you back to the bedroom. Will you emerge alive? Who knows! He doesn't, and you probably won't either.

Kureha:

He cares, but he's a bitch, so he'll make it seem like he doesn't. That being said, he's so incredibly obvious about his stares and his little hand twitches while he definitely doesn't fantasize about grabbing a hand full that it's almost comedic.

He lowkey (re: highkey) worries about your back, so sometimes he'll just walk up, grab your waist and start rubbing little circles into the base of your spine under the pretense of being bored and wanting to see what you're doing.

He will buy you clothes and expects you to wear them, because he likes they way they look on you. Even if you only wear them around the house for him, he'll be pleased.

Why yes, he is jealous, how did you know? If he catches anyone even so much as glancing at your butt, he's going to glare them into another dimension.

Retsu:

Virgin monk is a virgin, and he was raised not to stare because that's rude. That being said, he can't help it, he thinks your butt is beautiful and he'll outright tell you that whatever you're wearing looks flattering. Has he said this while you were naked? Yes. Yes he has.

Once he gets more comfortable, he's all about grabbing and squeezing at your hips, thighs and butt, though it's all in good fun, he means well by it, and he absolutely appreciates you letting him do this.

He has such comfy pants, much like Chiharu, so you should absolutely steal them from time to time. You know those things are flattering, you've seen them on him after all.

If you ever want someone to watch your form while you're doing squats or lunges, he's your guy, because unlike the others, who would absolutely take this seriously and not just use it as an excuse to stare at your butt the entire time.

[anomanlyarchives]

The Contract

A man was angrily stomping his heavy feet alongside the swimming pool, his undersized flip-flops regularly making a funny noise which somehow mitigated his intimidating appearance. He was, to say the least, huge. His body was swelling with muscles - strong, veiny arms, sculpted legs, and a couple of solid pecs protruding over a bulging musclegut. His face was not overly mature, but his big, although tidy, beard did make him look some sort of modern-day, fierce viking. However, just like his flip-flops, the tight briefs he was wearing did not seem to fit his frame entirely, largely exposing and highlighting his muscles.

As you may imagine, such a muscle beast did not go unnoticed. Everyone who was chilling by the pool couldn't help but stare at him, either attracted by him, jealous of him or simply despising his evident thirst for attention. What they didn't know, however, was that he was all but happy for all the stares he was receiving. Despite his striking appearance, he was trying so hard to ignore every single person who was looking at him, progressively walking faster.

The muscle beast finally stopped, menacingly towering over a group of young men around their early twenties. His eyes were locked on who seemed to be the boss of the little group, who had followed the big man's movements with a grin depicted on his face the entire time.

"What's with that look, sir? Something's wrong?", the young one asked. His group was giggling and whispering, not trying too hard to hide their comments about how ridiculous the man looked in his undersized swimming gear.

"We need to talk."

More giggling and whispering. The young boss defiantly looked at him for a few seconds before getting up with a sigh. "I'll be right back", he announced.

The man and the lad headed towards a quiet place, not so far from the pool. The big man looked around to make sure nobody could hear them. He was looking at the young one with a furious expression. "Seriously, man? I was with my family when I started changing! It's not fair!"

The younger one didn't seem to mind the scolding that much. Actually, even though the huge man was towering over him with a ferocious attitude, he didn't even seem to be bothered in the slightest. "Not fair? You signed a contract, kid". As he said so, a sheet of paper materialised in his hand.

"I know! But I'm fed up with your old body and your life. You said you'd only take my body for a couple hours at most, and you'd make sure I didn't need it to-"

"I don't remember saying that."

"You're a liar, you did!", the big man whined back, his deep, manly voice distorted into an unfitting lament.

The lad smirked and quickly read what was written on the sheet. "Even if I did, what's important is what's written on the contract you signed. And there's no mention about any kind of limitation for the swap. Ergo, I can take your body whenever I want. I couldn't give a fuck if your little family sees you transforming into a beast of a man."

The older man's face turned red in anger. "That's not what you said! You little-" he violently grabbed his former body, just to be repelled by a burning sensation.

A glimpse of malice flashed in the wizard's eyes, and his now young, attractive smile cracked. "Don't you dare to touch me, kid. I make the rules, and I can change them whenever I want." He was getting dangerously close to the stud, pushing him back towards the wall. They were facing one another, and their noses were mere inches apart. It was quite a paradoxical situation, as the much smaller, apparently armless kid was fiercely towering over that brawny beast of a man. "I could also decide to keep your body forever, and you could do nothing to stop me. Got it?"

The man gulped, and the young one seemed to enjoy it, as an amused smirk came back to his face. "Your friends seem to enjoy my personality more, too. They're wondering why you got so funny all of a sudden, you know? Besides", he ran his hand over the man's bulging abs, "everyone would like to be in your shoes right now. I know, maybe a little... too much. But, for a gay fellow like you, such a body is a blessing."

"H-how do you...", The stud stuttered.

"I'm not an idiot, kid. I could see it from the way you looked at me". The young guy suddenly grabbed the man's crotch. In response, the hunk startled, trying to hide his pleasure. It was no use: his dick was already fattening up, and his tight briefs left nothing to imagination.

"Bu-but... "

"No buts, kid", the wizard whispered in a seducing tone. "I know being older is boring and sucks, but... try to make good use of it, as long as you're in that enviable body. Look at you. You're a sexy, strong daddy. You can do whatever you want. You're free now, and with a spectacular body." The older man gulped as the wizard let him free and stepped back. "Now, go."

The muscular giant moved, heading back to the swimming pool. Before disappearing, he stopped and turned back towards his former body. "When will I have my body back?"

The wizard shrugged. "Erm... I'll need it until tonight, at least. And maybe tomorrow, too. I don't know if the guys are planning something for the next few days. Don't worry though, I'll give it back to you as your holiday ends."

The bulky stud hesitated for a few seconds. He then grunted and clumsily moved on, his undersized briefs hardly hiding his thick boner, and his large feet crushing his unfitting flip-flops.

"...if I feel like it", the wizard added in a whisper, a wide sneer on his face.

[kaliforniahigh]

Request: "Matt Dierkes x wife reader smutty one shot where they get caught on the tour bus or other random places?" Thank you so much for the request!

Warnings: cursing and a steamy make out session but no actual smut (they get caught before the act)

WC: 1.6k (not proofread yet!)

Requests are closed for now.

You loved going on tour with Matt, specially since you worked together. You were a lighting engineer for the band and you met Matt when you started working for the band a couple of years back.

The attraction was instant between you and everyone could notice. The way he never got mad at you - quite the contrary, the boy always seemed to have an extra soft spot for you - and the way you always worried if he was well - tour could be pretty hectic and take a toll on your health - were a dead giveaway that something was blossoming between you.

Despite everyone rooting for you to get together, there were the people who warned you about working with your partner. They told you that it never worked, and that you would fight all the time.

But you always told them that if it ever came to it, you and Matt could separate your professional lives from your personal ones, because you were adults, after all.

Now, a couple of years later, you and Matt not only established a relationship, but you also decided to get married not too long ago. Most days it didn't even feel like working with your husband, because you just went about your routines as per usual.

It was rare that Matt got angry with anyone really, he was pretty chill overall and used to dealing with things going wrong, so you felt like nothing really affected him anymore.

Today, though, was one of those days where everything seemed to be going wrong. First, the tour bus broke down on the road because of the cold, which made you guys late for the concert. Then, some of the sound equipment decided not to work and the panels were off and no one could figure out how to get those damn things working.

You could hear the fans outside waiting to come in and the stress of being late already and not having things ready were weighing on his shoulders. You could hear him in the distance him talking on the phone with the venue manager. Something about how the hell was he not here to help with the technical difficulties that most likely were being caused by his shitty venue.

You left him to it, and since your lighting equipment was already set up - thank god this one thing worked out tonight - you went to help the other guys. Everything seemed to plugged in in the right places and still, nothing was working. Even Noah, Jolly and the Nicks were helping at this point.

"Guys", Matt approached you all with a sigh. "The venue manager told me everything was working accordingly just a couple of days go, which is obviously bullshit", he rubbed his forehead, a clear sign of stress. You wanted to smooth out the creases yourself, but refrained from it.

"How are we gonna perform without our equipment?", Jolly asked, a hint of desperation in his voice.

"That's the thing, I don't think we will", Matt answered. Every band's fear was becoming a reality right before your eyes.

"Are we gonna have to cancel?", Noah voiced what everyone was thinking. Matt only nodded. "What about the fans waiting outside?"

"I'm really sorry, this is really not what I wanted to do, trust me. We could try and find another venue, but we gotta be in another city tomorrow. We might have to reimburse the people who paid for tickets for today", you could tell he was disappointed in having to do this. Matt was a problem solver kind of person, and having to deal with a problem he couldn't solve was killing him.

After a little more debate, everyone agreed that canceling was the best thing to do due to the circumstances. Noah and the guys went back to the green room talking about how they're gonna sue the venue manager.

"I'm gonna go out there and tell those people that the band they love is not performing tonight. You guys can start loading the things back in the bus", he started to turn around, but you went after him.

"Hey", you called out and he looked at you. "I'll go with you. You don't have to do this alone", you took your hand in his.

"You don't have to do this, baby. I'm used to it, it's part of the job anyways", he reassured you, rubbing his thumb on the back of your hand.

"I know that you can handle yourself. But I wanna go with regardless", he only nodded, knowing it was useless arguing with you, and you followed him outside.

The annoucement was met with complaints, angry remarks and a few crying faces. Matt knew this wasn't directed at him, but it broke his heart regardless. All these people with the hopes of having an unforgettable night would have to go back to their homes without watching Bad Omens perform.

He said sorry one more time and rushed back inside the venue. You said sorry yourself and followed him. You looked around you and saw that your lighting equipment was already being loaded back in the boxes and decided to check were Matt headed to.

You asked around and a few people told you they saw him going in the direction of the bathrooms. You made your way down the hall and knocked on the men's restoroom door, hearing him answer with a "yeah" on the other side of the door. He was probably wondering who the hell was bothering him when he was in the bathroom.

"You alone in there?" you asked him. Recognizing it was you, he opened the door and you made your way inside, closing it again behind you.

"You just ran off, I got worried about you", you told him as you took his face in your hands.

"I got so angry when I saw all those people out there, just waiting", he huffed in frustration.

"I know, baby. But this isn't your fault, and it probably won't be the last time you'll have to cancel", you tried to reason with him.

"I know, I'm just so fucking mad at that fucking venue manager who told me 'everything is working perfectly, are you sure it's not your equipment that's low quality?'", he used air quotes to tell you what the venue manager has the nerve to tell him. "He obviously ripped us off because he wasn't even here, he knows his venue is fucking shit", he spat, in anger. You waited a few seconds to say anything, just in case he needed to vent some more. But he just took a few deep breaths to calm himself down.

"I'm sorry, you don't deserve to hear all this", he apologized, resting his hands on your hips. You let a little smile grace your lips. You knew how to make him feel better.

"It's kind of hot when you get all angry like this", you said with a low voice and a hint of playfulness. He finally cracked and smirked a little at your remark.

"Yeah? You like it, babe?", you nodded and pressed yourself closer to him. "You know, you're my silver lining in all of this, right?", he said, lips inches away from yours, eyes travelling between your eyes and lips.

"I think I don't. Will need you to show me", you teased him and in a few seconds, his lips crashed on yours, pushing you backwards with the force, your back hitting the marble countertop behind you.

The kiss was fervent, an indicator of his mood and how this bathroom rendezvous was gonna go. You both moaned into the kiss, your hands tangling in his hair as he hoisted you up on the counter.

His hands traveled up your torso under your shirt and you lifted your arms for him to take it off, you skin prickling with goosebumps from the cold air.

His mouth immediatly moved to kiss your shoulders and down the valley of your brests.

"Fuck, you're everything I need right now", he hummed into your skin and you only moaned in acknowledgment.

"Take your shirt off, please", you said, voice sounding a little breathless, and he moved away from your body to peel off the layer of clothing.

"C'mere", he helped you down from the counter and turned you around, pushing your head down and making you bend your back, ass up in the air.

He kissed your spine and ran his hand over the fat of your ass, delivering a spank that made you yelp in surprise. His clothed crotch was pressed into you, and you could feel how hard he was under his pants.

He was about to yank your pants down your legs when the door swung open, both of you whipping your heads to the side, only to meet the shocked expression on Ruffilo's face.

You were still bend over the counter when you heard Matt tell him to 'get the fuck out', and Nick muttered a few apologies before closing the door behind him.

You looked at Matt through the mirror in front of you and you both started to giggle at the situation. Eventually, you stood up straight and turned around to face him. It was like Nick's entrance popped your little bubble entirely.

"Probably not the best idea to fuck in the bathroom, huh?" you asked in a teasing tone.

"That's you pushing me to make bad decisions", he smiled and gave you a peck on the lips. "As much as I loved our little almost escapade, we should probably get back out there", he stated, in a little disappointed tone.

You agreed with him and you both made your way out of the bathroom.

"We'll stay at a hotel room in the next city and then I'll make sure to bend you over the counter and fuck you good", he whispered in your ear, making you stop in your tracks, mouth agape.

He kept walking and laughed at the state he just left you.

[gabrielsbubblegumbitch]

I’m sorry but can you write more stuff about Vox being a gaslighter? I’m actually obsessed with your analysis

Thaaanks I'm obsessed about them too~ 🩵❤️

So, Vox is like the ultimate gaslighter. Manipulation and brainwashing? That's his whole freaking business plan. I mean, come on, the Voxtek slogan is "Trust Us," and somehow, people actually do.

Oh, let's talk about Voxtek - he's the worst, most manipulative boss ever. He's always pulling stuff like withholding essential information for a task someone's supposed to do, then publicly blaming them for screwing up. And he's sneaky about it too, acting all concerned and disappointed instead of just yelling. It makes people feel useless and insecure, so they bust their butts trying to please him and win back their colleagues' respect, never daring to stand up for themselves. Plus, he's a pro at keeping relationships between higher-up managers tense and distrustful by spreading rumors and creating a competitive vibe. And don't get me started on how he's a total hypocrite - Voxtek, like every other company, preaches its values and missions to create this fake sense of safety and purpose, but then he goes and acts against them or lets someone else do so. It leaves people feeling confused and helpless because they can't play the game when the rules keep changing. Let me tell you, Satan might work hard, but Voxtek's HR department works even harder.

And manipulating people on a personal level? Way too easy for him. People who don't know him well enough think he's some kind of genius (bless their hearts), so they give him way too much credibility. It's crucial for him to be seen as competent because that's how he stays in control. That's why he loves to question the competence of his business partners (Not to be that guy, but those numbers don't look great. Are you sure you can handle this? I don't want to waste my money.) or Valentino (Babe, I've got this. We both know you're not great with financial planning.). Thought hardly ever works on Velvette because she's got zero bullshit tolerance.

Now, when it comes to Valentino, Vox has zero remorse about gaslighting him. To him, gaslighting isn't even violence; it's just a way of handling things, all neat and effective. Why bother yelling and arguing when he can just manipulate Val into agreeing with him? It's like what we saw in episode 2. And even when Val has every right to be angry because Vox acted like a jerk, Vox tends to devaluate his emotions (I don't have time to deal with another temper tantrum, Val; You're always so pissy, why can't you just chill?) or tries to make him doubt his own reality (Maybe you'd remember it better if you weren't high all the time.). He hates arguing with Val, but also is unable to admit that he's wrong, so in his mind, undermining Val's ability to call him out on his bad behavior is a way of keeping their relationship healthy. But it's risky because sometimes Val sees through his manipulations, especially when they're about his feelings, and then things get even messier.

I like to think they trust each other when it comes to serious stuff, like protecting each other from outside dangers, but at the same time, it's like Mr. Gaslight Gatekeep Girlboss is married to Mr. Manipulate Mansplain Manwhore - you never know if he's being genuinely nice or if he's trying to get you to do something.

[thefiery-phoenix]

YANDERE SIRIUS BLACK X READER

Sirius during his school days at Hogwarts was actually kinda cocky. He was confident, with his looks and his charming personality, no one would be able to resist him. He never really had that much time to fall in love with people, true, he did like messing with people every now and then but he never expected to fall in love

You were in Sirius' year and he didn't really notice you till a certain amount of time passed. He was surprised, how come he didn't notice someone so cute looking like you? He observed you for some time: Your characteristics and your personality. He saw how kind you were and how sweet and shy you were, always kept yourself to yourself. He wondered how you even managed to end up in Gryffindor when you could've done well in Hufflepuff but whatever, he wasn't complaining. He had you closer to him and he was thrilled

His first goal was to become your friend and then ask you out to the Three Broomsticks where he'll confess his love to you and the both of you would be a happy lovely couple. It was the perfect plan for him, till you decided to form another path for yourself

You couldn't deny that Sirius was handsome and charming. But you weren't really looking forward to be in a relationship with anyone at the moment. So, when Sirius called you to the Three Broomsticks, he handed you a rose and ordered butterbeers and some desserts for you guys to eat. He didn't give you the idea that he was confessing his love for you since he wanted it to be a surprise, a surprise which of course his friends James, Lupin and Peter helped him in. They helped him in the decorations and keeping his bratty little brother Regulus away out of sight so he couldn't steal you from their friend

After you were done talking and chilling with your drinks and desserts, Sirius held your petite soft hands in his rough and large ones and went "Y/N, uhh... I don't know how to say this but I really love you and I'd love it if you went out with me'' he said blushing. Your heart dropped, you most certainly weren't expecting this. You just thought he invited you to have a chat for old times' sake and to relax as friends, you had no idea he was going to pour out his feelings for you

You gulped nervously and a heavy feeling settled in your chest. You didn't want to let him down, you REALLY didn't want to, but you had to follow your heart. And right now your heart was telling you to live life on your own terms and not to be in a relationship with anyone. Besides, you just befriended Sirius only for a few months, you had to get to know someone properly for like, YEARS before you wanted to date someone. You tried to let him down gently "Sirius, you're a great guy. I'm sure you have lots of people fawning over you and people who'd die to be with you, but.... how do I say this....'' you trailed off and rubbed the back of your neck looking awkward and a bit sad. "Tell me what?" asked Sirius anxiously peering at your face. He didn't want to hear your answer anymore, it would break his heart and he wouldn't be able to handle it

"I'm really not looking to be in a relationship with anyone right now... I'm sorry, I'm so sorry....'' you whispered and stared down at the table, not wanting to meet his eyes. Sirius felt numb, he felt like his heart was shattering into a million pieces and he couldn't move. You told him a quick 'bye' and ran off, his friends ran to comfort him

Meanwhile after a few days, you tried forgetting about him. But the hurt look on his face kept haunting you at the night. You were in the courtyard reading a book. The weather was nice and windy, quite the opposite of what you felt. You felt down in the dumps for rejecting Sirius, but you had a feeling he'd most probably forgotten about the whole thing anyway and besides, he could always find someone else. You had no idea how wrong you were: Sirius was not able to forget about you, he confronted his brother Regulus and asked him if he had anything to do with you rejecting him. Of course he ended up jinxing Regulus in anger since he felt that he was lying. Next he bullied Snape for a while thinking he manipulated you or bullied you to reject him till you intervened and asked him to leave him alone

Sirius was infuriated and it was like rubbing salt in a wound. Why TF were you standing up to SNIVELLUS SNAPE? Maybe he was right... maybe Snape HAD something and his worst fears were now confirmed. You could be dating Snape. His friends found out that you weren't dating anyone and that made him relax a little. He stalked you in his Animagus form for a while and you of course didn't know it was Sirius in Animagus form. You thought it was just a random cute dog and you spent time with it. Every single second you spend with him, holding it and cuddling with it, you were fueling his dark twisted desires for you. And these days you could see that Sirius was looking happier for some reason so... you assumed it was all good for him

It was... since he was planning to kidnap you the next time he turned into his Animagus form. Not exactly 'kidnap' you per se, he'd just keep you in the Shrieking Shack, but don't worry, Sirius won't leave you alone. Your kindness and sweet nature was too addicting for him and he was far too selfish to share you with anyone else....

[stellocchia]

Thinking of Secret Life SMP hybrid headcanons right now...

Grian would be a parrotlet. They're the smallest group of parrots and I feel like with how pathetic he's been this season he deserves to be just a little guy. He's still a pesky bird who, as season 6 proved, can definitely cause some mischief despite his reduced size, but he's a little guy anyway.

Jimmy is not a canary. Because, yes, he may have the canary curse, but that's just a fancy name for the curse, not necessarily his hybrid type. No, my man is a dog. He's a goddamn chihuahua. He's all bark and annoying but you take a single threatening step toward him and he shivers in fear.

On the topic of dogs, Martyn is a pomeranian. I'm specifically making him a small dog too because, despite wanting to act cool at the end of session 6, he is still very much the one who was first on yellow and red. My man is not big dog-coded.

Now, unpopular opinion, but Scar is a raccoon hybrid. He's a mischievous chaotic menace of a man. A little criminal ready to scam, commit arson, kill, and steal. He's a raccoon. He hasn't burrowed under anyone's house yet (that I remember at least) but that wouldn't be out of character either. Honestly, I'm appalled by the fact that this isn't a far more popular headcanon for him.

And, before I move on from dogs, Etho is also dog-coded. Specifically an Akbash (big white golden retriever-looking fuckers used for the protection of livestock). I just feel like the protectiveness and overall vibe fit him very well.

Finally, moving on from dogs. Cleo is obviously a zombie hybrid. There are no two ways around it. Though this does allow for my little headcanon that, having to learn on their own skin how to sew they became really good and really quick and they're the ones making all the new outfits for everyone else.

Gem meanwhile is specifically a sculk hybrid. Though I like to think that that came about when she opened the portal. She was a deer hybrid before (mostly because I like the subversion of expectations with a "prey" hybrid so to speak being arguably the most bloodthirsty person on the server) and then it spread like an infection. I figure by now her infected half straight-up looks something like Belos monster for from TOH:

Scott is something like a Reakirt’s Blue Butterfly. Both because the colors match him, and because he is kinda The Social Butterfly. My man is always out and about mingling with others. He's so friendly that he literally didn't struggle to pull off the "love you" challenge when everyone admitted that no one else would have been able to. It would be a waste not to make him some kind of butterfly at least.

Now, for Impulse I have something less reasoned, I just think the idea of him being an imp called Impulse is way too funny to resist. And he is way more of a mischievous one than I usually see people talk about. I've seen the phasmophobia stream where he killed everyone with the cursed items several times in a row just because he wanted to try them out. I know what he's capable of.

Meawhile his bestie Skizz is so capibara coded it's unreal. Like, don't get me wrong, he's plenty chaotic. But also you will never find anyone more lawful good in the Life Series than him. I've been thinking this since Love Island was founded. My man is the king of chilling with everyone. (Aside from Jimmy, rip Jimmy).

At the risk of being boring, I also like seeing Tango as a salamander hybrid. Exclusively because of the mythological connection between salamanders and fire. Also, the idea that every time he's flying (though it's funnier if it's also when he's simply jumping) he's nothing but a ball of fire with a lizard tail is very funny to me.

BigB is a hard one because I've only watched a couple of episodes from his POV so I'm not quite as familiar with the lore surrounding him as I am with the others. So I'm not sure. I want to say enderman because of his cryptid vibes this season, but he's not one of the characters with the biggest connection to the end. Those are mostly BDubs, Gem, and Lizzie, so I don't know. I'm open to suggestions.

Talking about BDubs, why are there no ender dragon hybrid headcanons for him around? I think it would be incredibly ironic if the dragon slayer was a dragon himself. Also, his house is under the Earth just like the End portals. Trust me, it makes so much sense. He's small but so full of righteous anger.

Pearl is no hybrid, she's literally just a witch. I've seen the WITCH animatic and that fundamentally changed my view of her forever. Before I would have said a moth hybrid of some kind because I do like moth Pearl, but I love that specific interpretation so much it's unreal. She is a witch with an army of hellhounds at her back and call.

Mumbo is a vampire because I've seen some art of vampire Mumbo at some point in time and it hasn't left my head since. Also, he's one of the players with the highest bloodlust every time he turns red. We're 2 for 2 on that with his appearances in the Life series. And it's usually also what leads to his demise. So I feel like that would be fitting for a vampire.

Meanwhile, my dearly beloved blorbo Joel is a honey-badger. This is a headcanon that is incredibly dear to me and I've never seen around but it's literally SO FITTING. The absolute crackhead energy, the lack of self-preservation, and the surprising sturdiness as time and time again he gets himself in impossible situations and still manages to survive until pretty much the end are all that exact honey-badger vibe. Like, just thinking of him summoning a hoard of zombies to fight off several infected and surviving for quite a while in those conditions just, really proves my point. Enough said.

Lizzie meanwhile is a very sad sopping wet cat. Just absolutely miserable. One of those cats who look like they're constantly grumpy. The frown has deepened ever since no one came to her party and she's still frowning in the void of death.

[potatothots]

U do dark, yandere👀??? Can I request Grandmaster Bi-han conquering a village and taking virgin!reader as concubine😗 (I'm sick I know🙃😐)

I hope this lives up to expectations! Sorry it was so late. You're not sick, either! It's fantasy!! :D Let me know how I did.

Genre: Drama 

Rating: Porn with plot - NO MINORS

Pairings: dark!Bi-Han x virgin!reader

Warnings: Loss of virginity, breeding kink, talk of death, concubines, non-con

Summary: Bi-Han takes what he wants. The Lin Kuei are always repaid.

Note - I'm not your guardian. You read what you want. I can't stop you. If you don't heed the warnings, too bad for you, not me.

I wrote it, didn’t like it, rewrote some of it, and finally found something I kind of like. Edited by me, however, potatos aren’t the best at editing their own work.

It was a sunny, beautiful day when it happened. There was a chill in the air and a threat of snow on the wind, but it wasn't out of the ordinary for this time of year. You were walking the market street. The smells drew you to various vendors selling dumplings and sweet rice balls. Along with the staples you'd need for the week for yourself and your aging parents, you decided to indulge in some of the sweets. Your dad had a sweet tooth like you; he wouldn't mind. 

As the sun set low on the horizon you started your journey home. There suddenly was a thundering sound. Like horrid storms, but it was coming closer too quickly to be natural. You held your bags to your chest and turned to the noise. The sight made you stop in your tracks. 

More than a dozen men on horseback were charging through the street. They wore gear and masks that signaled their affiliation with the Lin Kuei. You'd never seen them in person but had heard tales of their might and savagery when they wanted something. 

The villagers ran this way and that way, trying to avoid the men on horseback along with the flying debris they left behind in their wake. They smashed stalls and trampled over those unlucky souls who couldn't get away fast enough. Some had bows and arrows and took down more innocent civilians. 

It wasn't until a child ran to you, tears streaming down her cheeks, that you came out of your shock. You threw down your bags and grabbed her, pulling her to safety. Only, it wasn't enough. An arrow pierced her neck. It went so far through that it stabbed your chest. The sight had you screaming in terror. You let the dead child go to run yourself. 

You found yourself in an alley. Pressing your back to the wall, you watched the riders ride past the opening, paying no mind to the dark alley. 

You let out a trembling breath. Your whole body shook in fear. Moving away from the wall, you turned your back to the alley entrance. You had to get to safety. You had to get home. Your parents were in danger. 

As you started to run, you smacked right into a wall - no, not a wall. A giant of a man in the Lin Kuei garb accented with blue. His mask was ornate and hid everything but his expressive brown eyes. 

Those eyes trailed down your face to your chest. He reached out to touch the bloody spot. His fingers were ice cold as they moved your jacket away to inspect the wound through your shirt. You shivered, backing away from him. His other hand grabbed your upper arm to hold you in place. 

"Are you hurt?" He asked in a deep, gravelly voice. 

Your eyes narrowed in annoyance. "Yes! You're destroying my home! Of course, I'm hurt!"

He made a face behind his mask like he was smirking. You tried to pull away, but his grip only tightened. 

"Let me go. I owe you nothing." You said, trying to pull away again. 

"That's where you're wrong, y/n. You owe me everything. Your family and your leader can't pay what they owe us. Instead, they hid the things most precious to them. You, I've decided to spare. You're no son, but you can be very valuable to me in other ways."

"You're wrong about my family. Maybe our leader, but my family would never do anything to be indebted to the likes of a low-life clan like the Lin Kuei."

"You have no idea, do you? I've watched you these last few years. You indulge and never ask where the money comes from. You're either naive or choose to be ignorant. Your father has land, a title, a good job, and somehow has more money than others in his position."

You pause, mulling over his words. Yes, your family might be wealthier than most in town, but your father always said it was that he was good with money. Doubt clouded his words in your head now. Was it true? Why else would they come after you?

"What will happen to the leader's family? His children? Their children?" Your voice is tiny, sticking in your throat with fear. 

"We will get rid of those who won't fall in line." 

His words are so casually spoken that you have to look away. Tears pour down your cheeks at the implications of his words. 

You sniffle, looking back at him. "I'm no fighter. What use would I be to you?"

"You're so innocent." He cups your cheek with the hand that had been inspecting your shirt. "You don't have to be a fighter to warm my bed."

A wave of panic shot through you at his statement. You cried out a sharp "No!" before you finally managed to yank yourself away from him. Only so far could you go before you felt his cold touch again. He held his hand over your nose and mouth. His other arm was tight against your throat. The more you struggled, the more your vision went hazy. 

"Yes. Fight back. It'll make this easier for me." 

He kept talking, but your brain was no longer listening as you fought to keep conscious. 

—

You felt yourself come to. Women were chatting in whispered voices. A few glanced your way. An older woman with gray hair moved over to the bed you were lying on. She held a kindness in her face and movements as she helped you to get up. 

"You'll be Grandmaster Bi-Han's prize tonight. I need you to take a bath and clean yourself everywhere. Make sure to use the oil for your skin. Once you're done, put the robe on and come find me back here." The woman instructed while the two of you went to the bathing room. "Do you understand?" 

You nodded, tears forming in your eyes again. 

"Good. Now, stop crying. He wants you natural and if you keep this up your face will be blotchy and swollen."

She opened the door for you. You stepped in, stopping in the doorway to admire the beauty of the room. 

"You have thirty minutes until the grandmaster is finished with his day. Relax while you clean and pamper yourself. The grandmaster has a temper. It's best not to upset him. 

Here," she put some towels, washcloths, and a robe in your hands. "Calm yourself and get clean so I can dress you."

She didn't give you time to respond as she left the room, closing the door behind her. 

Alone, you realized how quiet it was. The cold air was making you stiff. With a huff, you set to your task: washing and massaging the oil into your skin until you felt soft like silk. No matter what you did you couldn't stop the anger and depression. You threw on your robe and headed back to the busy room. You hoped the woman wouldn't notice your face was still puffy. 

She noticed. Other than a sigh as she wiped around your eyes, she said nothing. A little powder, a simple hairstyle, and some sheer gloss highlighted your face. She dressed you in a silver cheongsam with various blues making up the embroidered bird pattern. Next, she placed a long, white fur cloak around your shoulders and shooed you away with instructions on how to get to where you needed to be. 

When you reached the door it flew open, revealing a hulking presence. He peered down at you, his face set in a scowl. You shifted from one foot to another as he lazily took in your form. 

"Inside," he quipped, grabbing your arm. He pulled you into the room before you had a chance to move yourself. 

He walked you to the center of the sparsely decorated bedroom. 

"Take off the fur." 

You didn’t want to. He noticed the hesitation. Bi-Han narrowed his eyes. His hands flew up to your shoulders and pushed the cloak off. 

His eyes seemed to warm as they trailed over your form. “Where did you get this outfit?”

“The old lady in the - “

“Shush. It’s perfect. Birds suit you. My colors suit you even better.” 

Bi-Han took your hand in a tight grip and led you to the bed. His eyes undressed you as his hands did. You were trembling in fear. You’d never laid with a man, never even let a man see you without clothing on. As your dress fell to the floor you felt tears prick at the corners of your eyes. This was not how you thought your first time would go. 

The grandmaster slid his hands down your sides, pausing to grip your hips. You shivered, goosebumps rising on your skin from his cold touch. His hands moved back up to your breasts. He squeezed them. A hum of appreciation sounded from him. 

“You’ll do well in producing heirs.” He said flatly. His tone seemed at odds with his lust-filled expression and his exploring hands. 

You bit your bottom lip and looked away. “What if I don’t?” You’d heard about women who couldn’t give male heirs. They didn’t last long. 

“I’ll allow you to keep my bed warm.” he shrugged. 

It wasn’t the answer you were expecting. However, you didn’t have much time to process it as he pushed you onto the bed. He crowded you, kissing and biting at your skin. It was overwhelming. There was some pleasure, but mostly pain. He was harsh in his fondling of your body. There was a slight reprieve when he sat up. You were hoping it meant he was done for some reason, but when he simply took his clothes off you knew it was going to be a long night. 

He was barely any nicer to your body when he pushed his cock into your pussy. It stung and you tried to move away from him, but he held you tight. 

“Stop pulling away,” he growled as he grabbed at your ankles. 

“It hurts!”

Bi-Han let out a huff, repositioning himself so your legs were over his shoulders. The intensity of the new position had you crying out in shock. It hurt, but something else was taking over. Your eyes found the grandmaster’s. As cold as his touch was, his expression was burning. You’d seen boys drunk outside of alleyways, their glassy eyes a dead giveaway. That’s how Bi-Han looked. Like he was drunk and needed more. He shifted his hips slightly and you let out a shocked squeak. 

“Gods, right there!” The words tumbled from your lips faster than you could even think of them. 

Bi-Han smirked. “Anything for you, little bird.”

That yearning feeling in your gut was turning your thoughts into white noise. Everything came to a head all at once. The feeling seemed to explode inside of you. Your eyes squeezed shut and you were sure you said something, but it sounded like babbling to your ears. Then, you felt a wet coldness inside you. Bi-Han fucked you through your orgasm, his own triggered by yours. As his hips slowed, your brain was able to catch up with your situation. Tears streamed down your cheeks.

“Hush, now.” Bi-Han cooed, kissing the tears. “You did well, little bird. I knew you would. You were always going to be mine.” He captured your lips in a consuming kiss.