#How quickly does food poisoning kick in?

[needtorefrigerate]

Can a burger give you food poisoning?

Can a burger give you food poisoning?

Can fast food give you food poisoning?

How long after eating something can you get food poisoning?

Why do whoppers make me sick?

How long after eating meat can you get food poisoning?

What happens if you eat a hamburger that not fully cooked?

Why did a burger make me sick?

What happens if you get food poisoning from a fast food restaurant?

How long does it take to get sick from fast food?

Can Mcdonalds give you food poisoning?

Can you get food poisoning immediately after eating something?

Can you get food poisoning 30 minutes after eating?

Can you get food poisoning from a Whopper?

What is the stuff inside Whoppers?

What is inside Whoppers chocolate?

What makes Whoppers chewy?

How quickly does food poisoning kick in?

How can you tell if you have meat poisoning?

What does food poisoning from meat feel like?

What are the chances of getting sick from undercooked hamburger?

Can you eat a slightly undercooked burger?

How pink can a burger be when you eat it?

Can you get sick if ground beef isn’t cooked all the way?

Why do I get sick after eating burgers?

Why does meat make me feel sick all of a sudden?

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

Clone wars headcanons that took me forever to edit

I feel like my last couple of headcanons have been mushy so I’ve decided to write some shit Ahsoka and Anakin do that piss each other off 

Ahsoka bites the skin around her nails all the time and most of the time she won't stop till they’re bleeding 

Anakin’s tried literally everything in the book to get her to stop 

He tried putting spices on her hands forgetting that she likes spicy food, he’s tried painting her nails (like that’ll do anything) but she keeps picking the paint off, now he just uses the force to remove them from her mouth 

That’s gotten a few growls from her but at least it makes her aware she’s doing it but it doesn’t stop her from bitting them a couple of seconds later

Honestly he’s given up and just sits in silence while she complains about the pain

Anakin paces whenever he’s even slightly nervous and she can tell how nervous he is depending on how fast he moves 

If he’s just kinda anxious he moves pretty slow but if he’s like one shirt caught on a door handle away from a panic attack he’s teleporting 

When Padme told him he was gonna be a dad he was ecstatic for about 24 hours but after that some invisible timer went off in his head he booked it to Ahsoka’s house (she lives down the street cause of course she does)

Walked into her room and woke her poor sleepy butt up with all his pacing 

Girl swears to this day he broke the damn sound barrier with how fast he was moving 

She just wordlessly sat up and patted her bed cause she knew she wasn’t gonna get any sleep until he did 

She sat by him and listened as he rattled off all his worries and only really stepped in when the darker thoughts surfaced when it was all said and done she turned to him and said “Now let me kriffing sleep” 

Should he have probably left the room yeah but he got a total of 30 minutes of “sleep” that night so it’s not surprising that he knocked the fuck out of

Padme was a little bit alarmed to wake up without Anakin but was quickly soothed when she read Ahsoka’s message “Your nerf herders with me” 

She knew the pregnancy would dredge up some unhappy feelings and she also knew Anakin can’t think clearly if he doesn’t have Ahsoka to sort through the bullshit in his head 

She just got ready for brunch with her two favorite people and smiled cause she knew Obi-Wan and Rex would join them for dinner with or without an invitation 

When Anakin and Ahsoka were living together they would kick each other out of their own bathrooms 

Why? Well Ahsoka said Anakin’s had better lighting and water pressure and Anakin would do it to spite Ahsoka because he knew it would piss her off  

Slowly but surely their stuff gets moved into each other's bathrooms and it’s a weird amalgamation of crap 

Also when they were living together Anakin would ask Ahsoka if she was hungry before cooking and she’d often say no because she didn’t want to impose but his cooking always looked and smelled good 

So half the time girl would just end up eating some of his food when she thought he wasn’t looking 

At first he was like “Snips you said you weren’t hungry” to which she would respond “Yeah I wasn’t hungry then but I am now” after that he starts making more food on instinct cause damn that girl can eat 

Anakin gets back at her pretty easily tho by taking the first bite of her food whenever they go out to eat his excuse is that he’s “making sure it’s not poisoned” he never does this to Padme cause he respects her too damn much 

And he can’t use that trick on Obi-Wan and Rex cause the former taught him the trick and the latter has a bullshit detecter built-in 

Both Anakin and Ahsoka pull that trick on the twins tho (which gets them a quick scolding from Padme) 

Speaking of the twins it’s not surprising that as they grow up they realize that their auntie isn’t human so of course like any normal child they have questions and Anakin being the little shit that he is spots an opportunity for some laughs 

So he turns to the twins all serious-like and goes “Well my loves we actually found your auntie in a dumpster we have no idea where she came from” the twins are distraught and go to the nearest adult who just so happens to be their uncle Rex 

And Rex also being a little shit backs up Anakin’s story with so much sincerity that even Anakin believed it a little bit 

The twins being the angels they are apologize to their auntie for her terrible origin story with tears in their eyes and her reaction more than made up for the swift ass-kicking the boys got  

When Anakin was taller than Ahsoka he made her life hell by making fun of her every time something was even slightly out of her reach

He would make a big deal about grabbing it for her while commenting about how the temple’s architecture wasn’t made with the “young ones” in mind 

Obi-Wan has turned multiple blind eyes when Ahsoka socked the shit out of his arm when he tells one too many jokes some days

When she finally grows taller than him she makes the biggest deal about it and no one can blame her 

While Anakin is the pilot Ahsoka is easily the navigator she often jokes that Anakin wouldn’t find his way out of bed without help 

Which is funny cause he often acts like a herding dog with her putting his hand on her back or holding her arm to guide her 

But he’s wrong 9/10 times so it’s not uncommon to see Anakin guiding her in one direction and then see him get dragged in the opposite direction a couple of minutes later  

[jujutsubaby]

after hours (part 7)

☆ pairing: toji fushiguro x afab!reader, satoru gojo x afab!reader ☆ summary: time to face the music, even if you're hungover. and by music...it's the missed calls and texts and from toji. what could he possibly want? ☆ tags: modern au, academia au, babysitting au ☆ warnings: mentions of alcohol, food poisoning, sexting, slight dubcon, dirty talking ☆ a/n: another longie (7.8k+ words SORRY) but i hope you guys enjoy the foreplay. y/n is about to be dicked down every day like good for her!! but also!! wish that were me! 🤭 next one will be filled with smut so dw u horndogs!! also i'm unsure when then 3sum will come but i'm thinking in like SOON in like...10ish parts (i hope not more). i want to slow burn lead up to it and hint it more before actually writing about it LOL (also ik it sounds like a taco bell commercial in the end its not ok i just love taco bell!!!) 🖤🤍 series masterlist 🤍🖤

the soft morning light shines through curtains you forgot to close last night, and the harshness of the sun causes you to stir in your sleep, waking you harshly.

your heart beats fast and you open your eyes and are unable to move a single limb on your body. panic sets in, only to dissipate seconds later as you find a rather tall lump of a man’s leg trapping you in the corner of your sofa.

ugh, how did i get here? why is it so bright? why does every inch of my body hurt? oh god, i’m about hurl.

you barely hold back dry heaving in your laid down position. your head is pounding and you don’t like how empty your stomach is right now. why do my legs hurt? i feel like i can’t feel them anymore. oh, right.

the large shape of a man who’s body is halfway strewn across yours, satoru, is now constricting the blood flow to your legs, and you know you have to do the daunting task of waking him up.

“psst, satoru. wake up.” you lightly pat his unruly head of white hair, but with no success. you start hitting his head harder, as you quickly start to lose more feeling in your legs, until you practically are shouting his name, swatting his head and kicking his torso. satoru abruptly wakes and turns around the small sofa, which actually has no room for turning, so he actually ends up taking a small dive into the hardwood floors of your living room.

satoru lets a groggy yet painful groan. “what the literal fuck, y/n?!” his words are almost incoherent with sleep laced between them as he rubs his arms that took the brunt of the fall. “as if my head isn’t aleady fuckin’ killin’ me.”

you groan out in pain. “my legs were being suffocated by your large body!”

none of you answer, and continue to lay still in your respective positions for what feels like hours, until your headache becomes almost too unbearable to withstand.

“satoru~” you whine out. “m’head…it hurts so much, i feel like i’m gonna die…” you turn your body as slow as you can to the edge of the couch to see satoru’s face. his eyes are still closed, but scrunched, and his hand is resting on his forehead.

“it’s called a hangover. get in line, stupid.”

“don’t call me stupid right now, satoru. i’m in pain!” you cry out, your fingers doing their best to sooth your pain by rubbing harsh circles on your temples.

satoru slowly sits up without looking at you, grabs a decorative pillow from the chaise of your couch, and immediately face plants on to it on the floor, effectively falling asleep once more. you think that’s not a bad idea, now that you have more space, and close your eyes and force your mind to concentrate on anything but your throbbing head.

okay, so we got back from the barcade. me and satoru…we…kissed. we definitely kissed. i remember that. and then? did we have sex? no, that doesn’t like us - neither of us are keen on having sex drunk for a variety of reasons besides the obvious ones.

your thoughts slowly drown out as you find yourself falling into a second deep slumber.

the second time you and satoru wake for the day is the most disconcerting: a loud, high pitched scream.

you wake up with your heart pounding so hard, you think you’re dying from cardiac arrest. satoru thinks he threw up in his mouth from how fast he stood up with a headache. both of your eyes look at the direction of the scream and see a horrified and bewildered shoko staring wide eyes and slack jawed at you. wait, why isn’t she looking at my eyes? she’s looking at my…oh my god!

you look down and see your bralette lightly torn up and your titties completely exposed and you immediately turn to look at satoru (who’s alternating between staring at your eyes and your tits). and then back at shoko.

oh? oh. OH. OH! it fucking hits you like a ton of bricks and your hungover brain immediately goes into panic mode, shoving all signals of hunger, pain, and soreness aside.

“sh-shoko, it’s obviously not like that. this is actually so funny, you know…” you do a failed attempt at a lighthearted chuckle and fumble around for a decorative pillow until satoru hands you the one he was sleeping on.

“yeah, it’s not at all what you think it is. i didn’t…i didn’t even know she had boobs until like…right now. i swear, it’s not-” satoru bumbles, also going into damage control.

“save it. i don’t care. not right now, when i’m too hungover,” shoko says, closing her eyes and raising a hand up as she bolts to her room and closes the door.

you figure you do the same and hastily get up and grab satoru’s hands. the two of you stumble your way into your bedroom and lock the door and catch your breaths.

“ohmygod this is so embarrassing,” you say whisper, not wanting shoko to overhear your conversation. you start rubbing your temples again as satoru face plants, again, on to your bed. he doesn’t respond to you so you join him and push him to his back and try to get his attention. his eyes are still scrunched closed and he lets out a groan.

“satoru, do you even know what happened? shoko probably thinks we had…ugh i can’t even say it!”

this makes him open one eye to look at you and cock an eyebrow. he lets out a laugh, which makes you let out laugh (against your will). you playfully hit his chest but he intercepts your wrists with ease and pulls you on top of him so that your sitting up on his torso while he’s laying down.

this feels nice but…you know deep down you two should probably address the elephant in the room. you uncomfortably clear your throat and he opens his eyes. “maybe we should talk about last night…” you say with a sigh.

“what’s there to say? there’s nothing wrong with two friends kissing,” satoru says cheekily, his voice still slightly deep and groggy. kinda hot.

his response puts you at ease, and your fingers start toying with the buttons on his shirt (not in a sexual way, but in a ‘this feels nice to fidget with so i don’t have anxiety’ kinda way).

“yeah, but maybe we should…i dunno…talk about it?” you question, avoiding eye contact with him.

“like?”

“like, i dunno…” you start to chicken out before forcing yourself to say what you really want to say. “i dunno…are we only gonna kiss each other from now on? because i kinda still…wanna kiss toji…” your voice becomes barely audible near the end.

satoru stays quiet for longer than you anticipated, and you’re about to step off him to throw up in the bathroom before he finally responds with a resounding hum.

“yeah, i don’t mind. if i’m being honest…with us having school and work and all…it might be hard to make this an exclusive thing. and also…i know mia was a bitch to literally everyone but…god…” satoru sighs deeply. “her ass was insane, i’m sorry!”

you laugh wholeheartedly and grab a nearby pillow and hit his head softly in jest. you should’ve known someone like satoru, someone as horny as satoru, would not want to be tied down during grad school just yet. a sense of relief washes over you as you feel grateful that satoru has always matched your wavelength since high school. you start to think of the second elephant in the room. what will we tell shoko? and suguru? and utahime and literally all of our friends? there’s no telling shoko hasn’t already told utahime…

“also…maybe we should keep this between us…for now. especially after…” you trail off, deep in thought about the prospect of your friends finding out. 

“yeah, that sounds like a good idea…” satoru says, smirking slowly. “definitely because of our friends but also…it’s always fun to have a sexy secret with someone.”

“shut up!” you give him a smack across the chest, before thinking. i mean, it’s not like you hated kissing him. and you didn’t hate it when he played with your titties. “maybe…i mean…maybe we can still, you know, fool around still?” you say shyly.

“maybe we can fuck too if that’s something you’re down for?” satoru says unabashedly.

you lean your body down, pressing against him, and bring your lips inches from his lips, before saying you’d like that a lot. he closes the gap and starts kissing you deeply, just like the night before. satoru’s hands move up and down your hips, leaving no part of your torso untouched. your hips buckle into his and starts grinding against his already hard member. your skirt from last night has already risen up, so the cool metals of his belt are grinding up and down your clothed core, making you squirm and moan into his mouth.

satoru breaks the kiss and you whine at the loss of contact. your lips immediately latch on to his neck, leaving small wet spots all over.

satoru groans. “fuck, need this off.” he puts his fingers around the waistband of your skirt and shimmies it off of you, leaving you exposed in your thong and have ripped bralette.

your hands immediately get to work and unbuckles his belt. your hands fumble as you unzip his pants and slide them halfway down, his erect clothed member coming into view. satoru lets out a throaty breath as you start palming his hard member and leaving kisses from his neck down to his happy trail. before you’re able to start kissing below the belt, satoru pulls your head up via bunching up your hair into a makeshift ponytail and starts to kiss you as he sits up. 

“maybe we should take this into the shower…” he mumbles in between kisses. you nod and break off the kiss. 

“what time is it?” you say, as you look around for your phone. you find it only to see that the battery is completely dead. frowning, you get up to charge it before continuing your activities with satoru. 

“jesus, it’s 11 in the mornin’” satoru says, sounding slightly flustered. “fuck! i’m gonna be late for a lab meeting!” he says, as he starts to put his belt back on.

you frown. “so no shower sex?”

“i promise you, i want nothing more than to fuck your brains out in that shower.” satoru scrunches his eyes, and you wonder if he’s in genuine pain over the fact that he can’t. “but i unfortunately told nanami i’d personally talk to professor masamichi about his referral.”

“since when do you care about holding up your end of the bargain like that?” you say, cocking an eyebrow. you’ve known satoru for years, and you don’t think he’s ever showed up to a professional meeting on time, nor did he ever care to follow through with requests given to him by his peers.

“yeahhh, i know but nanami said he’s gonna send a deep web hitman for me after tricking him into my party and forcing him to be on my pool team…soo…”

“you’re so insane.”

“i think i’m going insane forfeiting pussy to go to a lab meeting, alright?”

you laugh softly. perhaps it’s probably a good time to let satoru go so you can begin your day. you have a laundry list of things to get done that thinking about it is enough for you to feel sick (showering, studying, talking to shoko without satoru there, and more things you know you’re forgetting). “well, thanks for offering anyway,” you say. 

“c’mere,” satoru says, holding out his arms to you. you melt into the hug he gives you and look up. 

“still seein’ you for study group later?” you ask him, recalling you, nanami, and haibara were planning to do some studying for your final at the university library later this evening. 

“oh shit, yeah. gotta clean up the aftermath of last night at my place and then i’ll be there,” he assures you, before grabbing his phone. you quickly put on a pair of pajama shorts and replace your torn up bralette with an old sleeping oversized tee and lead satoru to the doorway of your apartment. you wave goodbye to him, and prepare yourself to have a potentially awkward conversation with shoko after what she saw this morning. 

you scurry to shoko’s bedroom and knock twice on the door, and shoko immediately opens it and lets you in. you give her a pouty look, internally apologizing for the sight in the morning. it’s not necessarily that she saw you topless (you guys are roommates and nip slips happen), it’s more so that you were topless with satoru. 

“glad to see you finally wearing clothes, you slut,” shoko says tiredly. you can detect a slight joking tone in her voice and it relaxes you immediately. you sigh softly. 

“listen, shoko.” you start but hesitate. you want to tell shoko what really happened last night, but you remember you’re the one who didn’t want to tell your mutual friends about you and satoru. shoko and you have been best friends for so long and you can’t bear to lie to her or keep something from her. no literally, you tried to in the past but she saw through you within minutes and you ended up divulging everything to her. you figure now is no different, and you also trust her not to tell suguru or anyone else. 

shoko snaps her fingers at you. “hello, y/n? where’d ya go?”

“i hooked up with satoru last night.” you say quickly, praying she doesn’t ask you to say it again. 

shoko is silent and you cannot read her face for the life of you. “okay, it wasn’t even a hook up, i dunno why i said that. we just made out and like sortofmadeittosecondbasebutit’snotthatserious-”

your rambling is interrupted by shoko’s laughter howling across the room. shoko tries to calm down and collect herself. “wow, i mean, i sort of clocked it because of how you were this morning but oh my god? like it finally happened?”

you plop down on her bed next to her and shake her to make her stop laughing. “shokoo~ stop it! i was really horny last night, okay!” you’re scrambling to defend yourself from this blunder. 

“yeah, but him? kinda…embarrassing, no? i mean i know he’s hot, like even i can attest to that but gojo is like…hot and insufferable…like i’m happy for you but at what cost to you?” shoko explains as she wipes away tears from her eyes from laughing too hard. 

“i know, it is embarrassing and i dunno what i see in him but…when i see him…shoko,” you start rubbing your temples as you feel your headache coming on again. “i just wanna fuckin’ jump his bones, dude.” you think you hear shoko mumble something about how she cannot stand straight people. she has a point. 

“so what now?” shoko asks, getting up from her bed and grabbing her scrubs from her closet, slowly getting ready for her shift at the hospital. 

“well, for starters, you cannot tell anyone because we said we would keep it secret so you gotta pretend you dunno about this.” you go on to tell shoko about how you guys would continue to fool around casually. “it’s because we have so much going on and you know…i still wanna kiss toji.” wait, toji. toji’s text? did he respond. how could you have forgotten something you were obsessing over the whole night yesterday?! it finally hits you that satoru finally took your mind off of toji for a while, and that he could’ve finally messaged you back this morning. 

shoko mulls this information over for a bit, and you already know what her next question is. “can i tell utahime? pleeeaaassseeee!” she whines. 

“if you tell utahime she might actually kill me in my sleep.” you say exhasperatedly. 

“no, no she won’t. she might want to take you for a psych eval or something but that’s it. she might throw up too, i guess. and she might cry for you. and she-”

“okay, i’ve heard enough.” you stop shoko, getting up from her bed and heading back to your room. before exiting shoko’s bedroom, you quickly give her permission to tell utahime but no one else. it’s quite pathetic how fast you run to your desk where your phone lay charging. your practically jumps out of your chest as you see 5 missed text messages from toji: 

toji: Holy fuck, pumpkin 🥵 your titties are so fuckin insane. im so fuckin hard right now.

toji: Wyd tn? 

toji: You’ve made me so hard right now n someone’s gotta help me fix this mess. Im bout to beat myself off to this pic fuck

toji: [1 Photo] 

toji: [1 Video]

you open the photo he sent and gasp. it’s a photo of him in front of his mirror, shirtless, and him holding his clearly erect member, except it’s barely peeking through the granite counter tops of his bathroom. you open the video and see it’s a video of him…oh my god, it’s a video of him touching himself? you’re appalled and turned on because he looks so good in it and you wish it was you getting him off instead. you check the timestamp, and you’re embarrassed to realize he sent this around the time you were having your heavy makeout session with satoru or around the time you passed out shortly after.

the video continues to play as you strip yourself completely, creep to the bathroom, and turn on the shower. as you wait for it to get to the temperature you like, you continue to watch the video of toji stroking himself, and your hand automatically guides itself to your already wet and throbbing core. just knowing toji recorded this for your viewing pleasure (and it was indeed an immense pleasure viewing it) turned you on so much that you felt near your climax already. you start rubbing harsher circles on your delicate bundle of nerves, until you’re unable to hold back any longer. the sound of the shower blocks out your throaty moans, and you end up coming undone around the same time as toji does in the video. you breath heavily as you see white streaks painting toji’s shower, not dissimilar from your location. 

through heavy breaths, you quickly send a picture of your fingers resting and covering the bare “v” on your body. this time, you immediately get a response. 

toji: Fuck pumpkin, you left me all alone last night and now you do this?

immediately you respond back, biting back a smile. 

y/n: you’re the one who left me hanging all day :( i had to cum all by myself just right now looking at your video daddy

you hit send and it’s been only 10 seconds before you see that toji is ringing you. you let it ring a little bit longer, not wanting to sound desperate for him, even though you totally are. “hii toji~” you say sultrily. 

“pumpkin, you better come over tonight.” toji’s husky voice sends shivers through your spine, and you have to physically stop yourself from rolling your eyes in pleasure. god, this is just what his voice does to you? you want him bad. 

“hmm, why should i? i’m hurt after you ignored me all day, toji.” you try to sound strict and upset over the phone but it’s hard when your body is already ready for another orgasm. 

“aww don’t gimme that,” toji coos. “i’ll take care of your pretty little puss- oh whoops, megumi is here, but you know what i mean.” you can hear him smirking on the other line and you almost get second-hand embarrassment from him almost saying a bad word in front of megumi. 

“how can you take care of me when you don’t even respond to my texts?” you whine. “go fuck the other girl you were fucking last night instead of me.” oh wow. you don’t know where that came from, but the hangover you have right now is making you feel brattier than usual. and you actually do want to know what he was doing (or who) all day yesterday, even if it makes you a hypocrite since you were with satoru last night (and this morning). 

you hear toji roar with laughter, a little too much in your opinion, and you pout. where does he get off laughing about how he ghosted me last night? “okay, if you must know…megumi got himself some classic food poisoning from the parent-teacher conference.” though the parent-teacher conference feels decades away, your heart drops for poor megumi and you gasp. “calm down pumpkin, he’s fine now so don’t worry. his friends just made him eat somethin’ weird on the playground, i think.”

“oh my god, toji!” you say horrified. “okay, i’m coming over tonight with some soup. and not for you okay, for megumi.” who are you kidding? you’re also partially going so toji could fuck your brains out but you’re not about to give him that satisfaction. 

“whatever you say, pumpkin. see you at 6:30? i’ll make dinner.” ugh, he always knows what to say to sound so romantic and you fall for it all the time. plus, seeing a domestic toji in the kitchen…god you can’t even think about it because you might end up screaming at how horny you might get.

“see ya, daddy.” you say jokingly. toji and you say goodbye and hang up. you quickly shoot a text to your study group quickly making up an excuse as to why you can no longer come. while nanami and haibara respond in the group with thumbs ups, satoru messages you privately. 

satoru: wtf i didn’t know fucking you this evening was still on the table?

 you furrow your eyebrows in confusion. what the hell is he on about?

y/n: what r u talkin about u weirdo

satoru doesn’t respond, and you’ve been wasting so much water already having an entire phone conversation with toji and, admittedly touching yourself that you might as well get in. the hot shower envelops your sore body, and before you’re able to fully wet yourself, you hear the ding of your phone. you really shouldn’t…but you were never good at controlling yourself. you quickly open the shower and bring your phone in, shielding it from the water. 

satoru: u obvi cancelled to see toji im not stupid

y/n: no comment 

satoru: cancel on him i promise u baby i will fuck u better and harder tn

your eyes widen at the offer. you recall a couple nights ago refusing a similar offer he texted you, but this time felt more serious. you want to see toji, but you also want to see satoru. you’re about to mull over the options before an image of a sick megumi pops into your forehead, and you immediately know you have to go to toji to at the very least see megumi and maybe read him a couple bedtime stories and help him with some missed homework. 

y/n: toji’s kid got food poisoning :( i feel like i should go see him but…let’s link tomorrow?

satoru: he’s using his kid to get pussy that is insane. but yes ok fine cya -_-

you chuck your phone outside the shower, and close your eyes. you try to think of things that don’t involve sexy moments with satoru or toji…or satoru and toji and instead think of how much extra studying you have to get done tonight since you’re opting to go to see toji. as always, you fail to think of anything else.

the timer for the soup you’re making for megumi beeps and you turn it off hastily, determined to finish up one last problem set before going to the kitchen. through some miraculous intervention (and advil), you were able to hunker down and solve through the problem sets you were supposed to solve with your study group and prepare a simple chicken soup for megumi. after five minutes, you check your work hastily, before deciding it’s enough for you to get full marks and sprint to the kitchen, which now smells like chicken stock and veggies and you hum. you’re excited for megumi to try the soup your mom had made for you whenever you had food poisoning. 

you go back to your room and finish packing your bags and picking your outfit for the night. since you’re  just staying indoors with toji, and the weather says it’ll be a pretty warm evening, you opt for your comfiest pair of fleece shorts and a well loved collegiate sweatshirt. you’ve perfected the art of a “no makeup” makeup look throughout the years, so you’re able to get by with just throwing your hair in a messy bun and calling it day. you quickly grab a large to-go soup container for the soup and pack your bags to head to toji’s place. 

you hate feeling like a child but just merely thinking of seeing toji after him being so distant with you yesterday has your heart doing cartwheels like you’re in fifth grade with a crush. you’re also excited to see a domestic toji in action in his fancy kitchen. maybe a bit too excited, you think, as you feel the wetness pool around your core. god, snap out of it already! the night hasn’t even started yet. 

you drive into toji’s 4-car driveway, only to see toji’s garage door open. huh, that’s weird. you normally park in his driveway (he’s asked you to so you’re not left walking to your car during the late nights when you babysit) so you pull up anyway, despite the confusion. you see toji’s head peek through the garage door inside and he looks…oh, he looks kinda upset. you’re about to get out of the car and meet toji but he starts to walk towards you, his face only softening a tiny bit, which is unusual. oh, something must’ve really annoyed him. 

you open your car door and get out halfway to talk to toji. “hey toji, you okay? what’s wrong?” your voice is laced with concern. once toji gets within arms length of you, you reach up and start rubbing his chest in an effort to sooth him. 

toji grunts, and quickly leans down to peck your lips. “sorry pumpkin, megumi just told me he signed up to bring brownies for his soccer potluck early tomorrow morning. n’ they gotta be homemade.”

you furrow your brows even more in confusion. you know about the monthly potlucks megumi has with his soccer team on the weekends, but there’s usually some silly theme to them (last month’s was barbie themed so everyone had to bring in something pink). you guess this time around the theme is homemade meals and treats. “what’s the issue? there’s still plenty of time to grab something from the store…”

“the issue is i wanted to use that time to cook something nice for my son’s insanely hot babysitter, y/n.” toji replies bluntly. 

“ohh~” it came out of you by accident, and you’re a little embarrassed as you feel the heat rising to your cheeks. “th-that’s fine toji. you don’t need to-”

“i wanted to…and then i wanted to eat her pussy for dessert.” his eyes darken and he smirks coyly. toji pulls your body closer to his and leans down to give you your first proper kiss of the night. your arms wrap around his neck, which he uses as a signal to deepen the kiss by inserting his tongue into your mouth. you allow him and his tongue wastes no time exploring every inch of your mouth. you find yourself moaning into the kiss softly and tugging on his hair, until you hear megumi yell for toji from the garage. you both immediately snap back into a respectful distance apart. 

“daddy, i’m ready to go.” megumi says, his voice slightly tired. you grab your bag and soup container from your car and walk inside the garage to greet megumi, who’s eyes beam when they see you. he runs to you for a hug, which you gladly return with one hand. 

“hey there, kiddo. heard you were sick last night,” you say pityingly. 

“yeah i ‘frew up because yuji and nobara dared me to eat some weird smelling cheese from the cafeteria.”

you make a disgusted face. “megumiii, you have to stop doing stuff because you think it’ll make you look cool. it’s just gross.” you stand up and turn to toji. “i made him some chicken soup, it’s still warm so be careful but i think it might help him out.” 

toji thanks you and takes the soup and your bag from you. he tells you to wait out here with megumi while he quickly puts it inside the fridge. you turn to megumi sympathetically again. “how are you feelin’ now, bud?”

“i’m totally fine now!!!” he says very energetically, doing various dramatic stretches to supposedly “prove” that he was all good. “but…daddy’s mad because now he has to make brownies instead of dinner for us.”

“daddy will get over it, don’t worry.” you wink to megumi. “i’ll put in a good word for you. maybe i’ll even help you bake some brownies, kay?”

megumi’s eyes light up at the sound of baking a sweet treat with you, and it melts your heart. “really?! you mean it?!” you nod in response and give his cheeks a friendly pinch, causing him to laugh. 

“what’s going on, you guys talking shit about me?” toji walks into the garage, and you finally get a proper glimpse of what he’s wearing: loose slim fitted grey sweats and a skin tight compression shirt (that perfectly shows off his toned chest), which he’s currently covering up (to your dismay) with a black fitted quarter zip. it almost makes you forget about how he swore in front of megumi. almost. 

“toji! don’t say that word in front of your son, oh my god.” you playfully chastise him as you pretend to cover megumi’s ears. 

“fuck, my bad. megumi, don’t say what i say.” toji says without a care in the world. 

“shit!” megumi says out loud, and he’s about to say another word but you give him a disappointed glare, which makes him immediately stop saying more alleged swear words. “to be fair, i learn most bad words from nobara. she knows soo many…” okay, you need to dissect that later with him. 

you notice toji reaching for his car keys and you start protesting. “wait, toji, i can drive us. my car is already open and in your driveway anyway…” you’ve never driven toji anywhere, and it’s kind of exciting to potentially have that opportunity now. toji seems to hesitate for a bit, purely out of ego of letting the girl he’s sleeping with drive him somewhere, but acquiesces. you give him a bright smile before taking megumi’s hands and heading to your car. you get him seated in the backseat of your mini cooper, and megumi marvels at being inside your car for the first time. 

“woah! this car is so small and tiny and fun sized!” he says while laughing, and you ruffle his hair. finally, the first person to ever say something nice about the size of your car! 

you shut the door and see toji already on the passenger side furrowing his brows while looking at your car. you know this look. you’ve seen this look on satoru and suguru, and any guy who’s over 6 feet tall and is riding in your car for the first time. 

“pumpkin, i am not gonna fit inside here. let’s just take my car.” 

“don’t be dramatic, you’ll fit. everyone fits inside this car. now get in.” you huff, already getting settled inside and putting on your seatbelt. toji get into the passenger seat, and the sheer weight of his build causes the car to shake. he adjusts his seat and tries to get as comfortable as he can. you see his legs are bent in uncomfortable angles as he puts his seatbelt on. 

“this is the last time i’m getting in your tiny ass car, y/n. i feel like i’m about to die.” oh he called you by your name. he’s definitely hating this but…he did ignore you the whole day yesterday. sure, megumi was sick but it would’ve taken 10 seconds max to say that through text. 

you start to back out of his driveway and drive to the nearby target. “you’ll get over it. also, i was thinking…” you make eye contact with megumi from the backseat and give him a wink and he returns one as well. “maybe i can help megumi with baking brownies, too. and maybe we can just order takeout instead? spend the rest of time helping megs get his rest for tomorrow?”

you bite your lip and turn to face toji during a red light. you hate to sound cocky, but you know he can’t resist you when you’re looking at him like this, and you’re right. toji obliges, but swears he’s going to pay for dinner regardless, and you don’t object. 

megumi fills the car ride with random tidbits and stories from school and his sick day yesterday while you and toji entertain him. throughout the ride, toji alternates between holding your free hand and rubbing circles on your thighs while you drive, which you make a mental note of telling him not to do because it definitely distracts you from the road. 

at target, the three of you grab ingredients for the brownies pretty quickly, before getting in a moderately long line. while waiting, your eyes wander and see the cutest black lace bralette (pretty similar to the one satoru destroyed last night). you really want to check it out, so you quickly tell toji and get closer to inspect it. the beautiful lace designs are just so your style, and the price range is perfect, too. you make another mental note to come back and make satoru buy it for you. 

“like what you see?” toji’s voice startles you and you turn around quickly, and feel the heat rise to your cheeks. “i think you’d look sexy in it, for what it’s worth.”

“th-thanks, toji. i might get it later…”

“you should get it now. i’ll buy it for you. after all, your bralette got ripped last night, right?” what. the. fuck?

the color drains from your face and if you weren’t feeling hot before, you sure are burning up right now. your throat feels dry and you start stuttering. “wha-what are you talkin’ abou-”

“the one that…god what was his name? satoru? yeah, the one that satoru ripped, right?” toji is fully smirking amusedly now, and you look like a deer caught in his headlights at his mercy. 

“h-how do you know th-that?” you say, your eyes widening at your (slutty) night out being caught by toji. 

“oh, sorry, i thought you knew. i called you last night, pumpkin, remember?” toji inches closer to you and his pupils dilate. your breathing gets more erratic and heavy. what? no he didn’t. or did he? oh my god. it hits you that you answered his call via your body movements with satoru and you didn’t know. and you didn’t bother checking your call logs this morning because there was no missed call from toji since you technically answered it. oh my god. 

“you made me so fuckin’ hard with that pic of your tits, y/n. i had to call you to help me get off, but it seems like you were too busy getting off too.” toji’s lips are inches from your ears, and you can feel his breath as he whispers in your ear, and it makes your eyes roll far back in your head. “i can’t lie, pumpkin, your moans while he was playing with you…” toji groans and you dare to look down his hips to see a tent forming in his gray sweats, making your breath hitch. “it made me so fuckin’ turned on that i just had to touch myself to it. but don’t worry, you didn’t miss much. i sent you a full video of it, too.” 

you have to bite your lip hard to prevent yourself from moaning in the middle of the women’s section of target out of all fucking places, but you let out the tiniest whimper that only toji can hear. 

“don’t worry, pumpkin. i’m not mad you were with someone else. you’re such a needy slut who needs to be taken care of, and when daddy can’t help, you have to find your own way, isn’t that right?” he grabs your jaw roughly and forces you to make eye contact with him. “answer me, pumpkin.” he says more forcefully. 

oh, you are so finished. you are done for. your panties are a complete mess and you wish you had brought a second pair with you because they are just ruined. you swallow before answering toji with a shaky “yes daddy.”

toji releases your jaw, but not before giving your lips a quick peck that leaves you wanting more. way more. he squeezes your ass, which you don’t expect and let out an unfortunate and embarrassing squeak, causing a handful of people nearby you guys to turn around and wonder about the noise for half a second. toji grabs the bralette and heads back to the line where he made megumi wait with the cart. you take a moment to yourself to process the information toji revealed and get your breathing under control before heading back. you feel like maybe you should be upset about this, but…it’s just turning you on? those forbidden feelings you’ve been having about satoru and toji taking you at the same time are bubbling to the surface with toji’s confession, and you force them down unsuccessfully. toji’s a fuckin’ freak but that just turns you on even more. 

in the car, you’re still unable to properly hold a conversation with megumi and toji properly because of how flustered you are. you crack a window open, and you bite your lips so hard that you’re sure you bruised them when toji places his hand on your thigh again. a mangled moan gets stuck in your throat and you cough quickly to cover up any suspicion. 

“s-so, what are we gonna do for dinner? t-takeout? where?” you stutter, quickly trying to regain your composure. 

“i want taco bell!” megumi yells excitedly from the backseat.

“megumi, y/n is our guest here. we can’t just take her to taco bell. think of a nicer place than that. what about panda express?” toji turns around to chastise megumi, but his hands are still firmly gripping your thigh. 

you cough again and wish you had a bottle of water to help your dry throat. “i love taco bell! let’s go, it’s okay,  toji.” you press to start the car ignition, and ride to taco bell is anything but silent, with megumi talking about the countless items he wanted to get from taco bell, and toji dissuading him from doing so. 

“even if you’re feeling better, why in the world would you want to eat a chicken crispanada? who even told you about that?” toji asks exasperatedly. 

it’s probably yuji, he’s always eating something weird.

“yuji told me about it.” megumi says without missing a beat, causing you to smile. by the time you pull up to the taco bell drive-thru, toji has talked down megumi to reduce his never ending list of taco bell items, but not by a lot (“he’s a growing boy!” you told toji). 

toji does the honors of remembering everyone’s orders and responding to the cashier when he asks what the order is. “yeah, uh, hi, can we get 5 crunchy tacos, 1 mexican pizza, 1 chicken crispinada…”

“CINNABON DELIGHTS!” megumi interrupts from the backseat. 

“yeah, uh, the 12 pack cinnabon delights…” toji looks over at you to get your order. you whisper to him you want a crunchwrap supreme and he frowns when that’s the only thing you want. “you gotta have something else, pumpkin…” he encourages. you know you probably should, but there’s no way you can eat as much as him and megumi, which makes you hesitate. 

“i just don’t think i can finish another thing by myself…” you say quickly, knowing the cashier might be getting annoyed at how long it’s taking for you guys to order, but toji doesn’t seem to care. 

“we can split some nachos, yeah?” toji squeezes your thigh reassuringly, and you smile and nod. 

“yeah, and maybe a nacho bell grande? that’s all for us.” the cashier sounds bored and he tells you guys the total and asks you to pull to the front. in the front window, the bored cashier’s expression immediately changes when he looks at you…wait. not you. 

the cashier immediately straightens up and adjusts his shirt. he looks almost nervous as he reads out loud the order you guys have, but stutters every time he looks up and makes eye contact with…toji. he stutters out the total, and toji smirks at him while he takes out his wallet and pulls out his card, passing it to you to pass to the cashier. the cashier hesitates to run his card, and it looks like he’s deep in thought before he starts to speak, this time more confidently. 

“um, actually, sir, we’re having a new promotion if you’re interested…”

toji hums in response. “and what’s that?” he asks it so sensually that you have to do a flabbergasted double take between the two of them. is this what you think it is?

“you see, the meal’s on the house…in exchange for your number.” the cashier coyly returns a smile to toji, not breaking eye contact with him, and as a result, totally ignoring you and megumi in the car. you sneak a glance behind you at megumi and you’re surprised to see him looking completely bored and unamused by what’s happening. 

“gimme a pen and the receipt and you got it, sugar.” toji’s response is a bit too quick for your liking, but you’re still in shock as a quickly jots down his digits before handing the receipt back to the cashier and pocketing his card. the cashier winks at him as you drive up to the second window for your food and toji looks completely unphased by what just transpired. you turn to look at him incredulously, with wide confused eyes and your dropped. 

“what…was that?!”

“jealous? don’t worry about it, pumpkin. not the first time someone’s asked me  my number for a free meal.” he chuckles, still nonplussed about the entire interaction. 

you shake your head, baffled. “w-what? so you’re telling me multiple are just? into you like this? also i’m not jealous!”

toji shrugs and grins. “guess so. i mostly care about the free meal, and currently, my eyes are for you.” he assures you by squeezing your hands quickly and giving you a quick kiss on the cheek. 

you laugh at how absurd it is. no way he’s flirting with cashiers for a free meal. you make a mental note to tell shoko about it later, even though you know it will just fan the “toji doesn’t have a job” flames even more. “oh my god, you’re a slut! you, like,  just give it up real easy, huh?” you tease, but you make sure to mouth the word “slut” so megumi can’t hear the foul language. 

“you’re one to talk,” toji says, and you both laugh as you get your food and drive home quickly before the food gets cold. 

at toji’s place, toji helps set the dinner table for megumi, while you offer to start on the brownies since you weren’t as hungry. toji sits at the dinner table with megumi, and you both entertain him and his jokes and stories as he eats his dinner hungrily. after a particularly disgusting story about yuji eating a worm on the playground (“this is why you’re getting food poisoning so much, megs!” toji says while you chastise him once again about the dangers of peer pressure), you can feel megumi’s voice get lower as he gets more tired. it makes sense – he had a rough day yesterday, and so he’s more tired today. 

“someone’s sleepyyyy” you sing and lightly tease megumi, as you fill up a cup of water for him. 

“i’m not! i’m very awake and i can watch-” megumi is interrupted by his own yawn which he fails to hide from either of you. “i can watch some tv. i need to watch more euphoria…” he pleads. 

“what is this show you’re watching?” toji questions, looking at megumi quizzically as he starts throwing away trash from megumi’s dinner. your eyes widen and before megumi answers, toji cuts him off. “doesn't matter. no tv for you because your body needs to recover and you need to sleep early tonight.”

megumi pouts so hard that tears begin to brim his eyes. “but this isn’t fair,” he whines. 

toji picks him up with one arm with ease (did his biceps get even bigger?). “tell you what, you go to sleep early, and let me and y/n bake your brownies for you. and i promise you i’ll let you have a brownie for breakfast tomorrow morning.”

you shoot toji a frown. you always try to prep some overnight oats or pancakes or something more balanced for megumi to have in the mornings after you leave, but you know toji has to lose some battles to win some to avoid a crying temper tantrum tonight. toji shrugs as he looks at you and throws the remaining trash away, as megumi immediately cheers up hearing about his impending brownie breakfast. 

toji turns to you. “gonna put him to bed, be right back, pumpkin.” he gives you a quick wink which sets your heart ablaze, thinking about what the rest of the night will hold. your dinner is probably cold but you don’t care as you’re back in the target clothing section, toji’s words sending a chill across your spine and drying your throat. you both haven’t gotten alone time since then, and, as much as you hate to admit it, you feel yourself getting wet through your panties. 

you take a seat after setting out  the ingredients for the brownies on the granite counter, and have to cross your legs to prevent your thoughts from getting too dirty too fast…

[acewithapaintbrush]

A very short Zolu Valentine's story for the lovely dumbass zone server over on discord

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

“Happy Ventilator Day!”

Zoro opens one eye and peers up at his ridiculous captain. Luffy grins down at him and holds out a little chocolate heart. It's trapped between his pointer finger and thumb and the chocolate is already beginning to melt, coating the tips of his fingers. It looks misshapen, highly unappetizing and messy and-

Zoro holds out his hand and accepts the melted mess. “It's Valentine's day, you idiot.”

Luffy blinks. “Really? That makes more sense I guess. Wait, no! It doesn't! Who is Valentine? Why is it his day?”

“Beats me.” Zoro pops the small heart into his mouth. He is not a chocolate guy but is pleasantly surprised when the center turns out to be rum. 

Luffy bounces on his feet, a big grin on his face. “There is alcohol in it! Sanji helped me with that part but I did everything else myself. Do you like it?”

It takes a herculean effort not to grimace at the mention of the stupid cook but no matter how much Zoro dislikes the idea, it's probably better that he helped Luffy. No one needs food poisoning that bad. 

Luffy raises his fingers up to his mouth to absentmindedly lick the melted chocolate off of them. Zoro stops him by grabbing that arm and pulling the man down into his lap. His captain grunts which quickly turns into a bright laugh. 

Always laughing, that guy. 

Zoro loves that sound but he also loves the way it cuts off with a sharp intake of breath when he starts to gently clean those fingers with his tongue. Luffy stares at him with an intense focus that is usually reserved for fights and Zoro revels in it. No one can capture his captain's attention quite like he can and Zoro takes pride in that. 

Maybe a little too much. 

Only when he is done cleaning the sweet mess completely does he raise his eyes, locking eyes with Luffy's and licking the corner of his own mouth in a way he knows will kick his captain's brain into overdrive. 

“Yes. Very sweet.”

Luffy unconsciously licks his own lips which makes Zoro smirk which in turn makes Luffy narrow his eyes in contemplation. It doesn't take long before he starts to pout, the kind of pout that they all know is fake because the mischievous glint in his eyes gives him away. 

“No fair, Zoro!” he shouts and wraps his arms around his swordsman’s neck. “You didn't leave anything for me! I wanted a taste too!”

“Well,” Zoro drawls and pulls him closer so he can whisper into his ear. “Then take it.”

The rest of the crew avoids this part of the deck for the next few hours. 

Which is for the best. 

[p1nkshield]

Welcome to chapter five! Sorry it’s been a minute! Hope you enjoy!

Damian sat at the kitchen counter, quietly observing the trio as they began to cook.

“Okay!” Sam began, “the cauliflower needs to be roasted for the sauce, potatoes need to be peeled and boiled for the gnocchi.”

Danny surveyed the kitchen like a battlefield with what looked like, from what Damian could glean, instinctual observance. As if he expected the fruit to sprout teeth and bite him.

Danny seemed to notice his gaze.

“Uh, I can prepare a spice mix for the cauliflower!” Danny offered.

“Cool” Sam said as she cut the cauliflower into quarters. “What about you short stack?”

Damian bristled at the nickname.

“I am not short, I am the ideal size for stealth.” Damian added a sniff to add to the validity and aloofness of his statement.

To his dismay however he was met with a chorus of laughter and awwws.

“Okay then what should we call you? My name’s Sam!”

“I’m Tucker!”

“And I assume you know my name since you held a knife to my throat lol”

This was not ideal. The goal of this was to scope out Daniel’s allies while instilling fear so that he stops his snooping.

That was the goal.

Not to eat food that sounded delicious.

“My name is Damian Wayne. The blood son of Bruce Wayne and protector of the Wayne family name.��

“…”

“…”

“How very intense.” Danny remarked.

Damian smirked at this acknowledgment, not catching the amusement in Danny’s tone.

“Well Mr protector of the Wayne family name, can you peel potatoes?” Sam asked.

“Yes of course.”

Damian has never peeled potatoes in his life. He’s seen Alfred do it though so how hard could it be?

By the third potato Clark had run out of bandages. Despite his determination to finish his duty was confiscated.

“At this rate the dish won’t be vegan anymore!” Sam teased as she expertly peeled the remaining potatoes.

“Don’t worry man you’ll get a handle on your knife skills!” Tucker said in an attempt to soften the blow.

This comment did quite the contrary.

“My knife skills are superb! My own mother practically trained me since birth to wield a blade! Grayson also complimented my proficiency after I nearly beat him in a sparring match! How dare you imply a lack of skill!”

Damian’s outburst was met with silence and he immediately realized he had said too much.

“Trained since birth?” Sam echoed with concern etched in her face.

“You had to fight Grayson? Like Dick Grayson?” Danny said slowly approaching the boy.

Damian’s face began to resemble a tomato. His temper had gotten the better of him! What about these people made him forget all his interrogation training?

“I… no!” He said shielding his face from their prying gazes.

“That was a lie! I have never held a sword!”

“THEY GAVE YOU SWORDS?!?” They all asked in unison.

“NO!”

The silence hung thick in the air. The only thing that cut through it was Damian’s stomach growling.

This was beyond embarrassing.

“We should just finish this. Damian signed up for gnocchi not an interrogation.” Sam said, causing the boy to sigh with relief.

They returned to their work and the previously easy tone. Complaining about the five page essay they had to write the class of one Mr. Lancer.

“Dude I cannot even begin to understand what he means by ‘the wallpaper represents Amelia’ it’s wallpaper!” Danny began.

“That I understood.” Sam began. “During the time this was written green wallpaper was colored with arsenic. Specifically this was the time where people knew it was poisonous but still used it anyway.”

“What does that have to do with Amelia purposefully destroying all of her relationships?” Tucker said incredulously.

“…”

“…”

“Oh.”

Todd would have gotten a kick out of this conversation.

They finished rather quickly. Setting the table with six place settings.

Damian looked at them quizzically until the front door opened.

“SURPRISE!”

“Oh!” Clark exclaimed startling back into the doorframe.

Damian knew that was a fake reaction. Kent could smell cookies baking in Utah from L.A.

“These are my friends Tucker and Sam! Also we made a thank you dinner for being so nice and welcoming to me and my sister.” Danny finished his sentence rather sheepishly.

“Awww! Thank you so so much! I’m sure it will be great!” Clark said with one of the brightest smiles Damian had seen in his whole life.

Damian had made a very good decision about staying. The meal was very good. Maybe because he felt pride in being a part of making it.

He yawned. No good. His guard was far too low. At this rate he will never intimidate Daniel. He blinked for perhaps a bit to long for the next moment he found himself in his own bed at the manor.

Father must have come to get him.

Curses!

Next time Daniel.

You will rue…

The day…

His eyelids slid shut once more.

@bushbees

[vibingpyro]

English Muffin

Hobie Brown.

Hobie Brown is a menace, truly. Ever since joining the Spider HQ, he has been a lingering shadow, always poking and prodding, not to mention cracking some sarcastic yet admittedly funny comments about Miguel and the other spiders.

But unlike Hobie, I'm a much more secret menace, sometimes stealing the last coffee creamer from the cafeteria without notifying the others that work there to restock, or even taking someone's unmarked leftovers in the communal fridge of the break room. Which leads us to now.

I'm currently eating on an, what I assumed, unmarked and unclaimed english muffin in the break room of the headquarters, sitting down on one of the somewhat battered chairs in the annoyingly bright light that occasionally flickers out every so once and a while.

And right now, I've never wanted it to fizzle out so bad.

My eyes flicker up, meeting Hobies intense gaze and I freeze, mid bite. 'oh shit' I quickly think as Hobie also seems to freeze for a moment an unreadable expression on his face as he walks closer, his hands placed in his pockets of his vest.

"Is that my muffin?" He asks bluntly, although there's an amused tinge to his voice.

I shut and open my mouth, quickly putting down the English muffin back in its wrapper I had found it in, and sure enough, there is a small almost unreadable signature on the wrapper that I hadn't seen at first glance and I physically grimace.

"...maybe?" My voice squeaks out, as I gather up the courage to look back up at Hobie, I swear I hear him snicker for a moment and I can only blink in surprise as he pulls out the chair across from me, and sits down in it.

"Y'know, it's not polite to eat others food." He says, and I immediately open my mouth to apologize but he speaks before I can. "I'm just takin' the piss, love. You're fine." He says, his hand moving out of his vest pocket to make a waving motion in the air, always using his hands to speak this one.

My eyebrows shoot up at Hobies words, and as I look at him he truly doesn't seem bothered by the fact he just caught me eating his English muffin, mid bite and all. It's hard to believe that this is how he's reacting when not even last week, he reprimanded and instant mashed potato-ed another spiders front lawn before it rained as revenge for eating his cheeseburger.

"You're sure?" I ask, squinting my eyes in suspicion, gazing down at the English muffin as if it personally kicked my grandmother. "You didn't poison it or something, did you?" I question, half joking.

Hobie snorts at that, but shakes his head to my immense relief. "No, but I probably should start lockin' my food up at this rate." He shrugs and I laugh, nodding along to that. "That would probably be for everyone's best interest." I reply, my hands reaching out to take another bite of the English muffin, it truly is delicious.

It's only when I begin to think, as I take the bite that, why is he being so nice to me? Hobie and I typically don't interact unless we have been tasked together for a mission. He has always been kind to me in passing, giving an encouraging pat on the back, and telling jokes to lighten the mood when we are assigned on missions but I'm certain he does that with the other spiders as well.

After I swallow my bite, the question seemingly passes my lips before I can rationally think about it. "Why are you letting me do this?" I ask, leaning my arm on the table with my head resting on my palm. One of Hobies pierced eyebrows quirks up, and he replies amused. "We're friends, aren't we." It's not said as a question more of a statement

I blink. "So you're not planning some oddly elaborate and time consuming prank for me to clean up?" I ask.

Hobie stares at my face, "Are you going to eat my muffin, or keep askin' oddly elaborate questions?" He replies, that amused tone still there but this time with a hint of sass with his eyebrow still quirked up.

My eyes narrow, as I pick up the English muffin once more, taking another bite as my reply. Hobie rolls his eyes, with a small smile on his lips, shiny piercing at the side of his lip catching in the glint of the lighting of the breakroom. 'Look away from the pretty British man, look away from the pretty British man- oooh but he's so pretty' I think, shaking my head as a rapid blush rises to my cheeks.

I avert my eyes as, the last thing I want to do is possibly make Hobie too uncomfortable with my staring, but for a very brief moment, I think I see Hobies pupils turn into hearts.

'nah, this muffin probably is poisoned after all...'

[wez-star]

in the end it's him and i [nell jackson x reader]

Summary: captain jackson turns out not to be dead

Reader is love quinn kinda crazy

This is just a quick story non-smutt. im working on those requests i never got to writing bc of life (i got a crush) ao3 wattpad

God, these stools are uncomfortable. I look at nell behind the counter as she pours me a drink.

"Here you go." she slid the glass to me and smiled. This situationship has taken more of a toll on me than i expected. "Thank you" i smile at her. "You're welcom dear" she responds with the slightest smirk

The bell above the door rings, and i draw my attention to a man around the age of 28 stepped into the pub. I glance over at nell

Her face dropped as if she had just seen a dead man. "Nell!" the man exclaimes and nell runs towards him, i mean she basically jumps into his arms

Who the fuck is this?!

"Roxy! george! Come down here!" Nell shouts, and about 30 seconds later, her 2 little sisters are in the room with us. "This is my husband, captain jack!"

Excuse me?!

"I thought he was dead?" Roxy being the one to speak wha-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

"Hello?" George waved her hand in front of my face "yes?" "You were totally zoned out?" I stare at the small ginger girl for a few seconds before regaining myself and turning my attention towards nell and her husband

"You should come over for dinner tonight! The two of you!" I smille and suggest "that would be lovely" captain Jackson answered before nell could respond. She looks at me with a strange pitying look.

I don't quite remember exactly how i got home, and the next few hours went by. But when my butler sir humphrey comes to inform me that the guest have arrived the anxiety starts kicking in

"Lead them to the dining room and tell them i will be right with them" i tell him and quickly walk towards the garden, i thank god every day that he decided to give my brother cancer, leaving me the only living descendant for my fathers estate and wealth, such a tragedy that my father drowned.

Im not impulsive. Just because i decide to grab wolsbane last minute before dinner does not mean im going to poison nell or her husband, and i certainly would not do it on impulse.

Oh who am i kidding?, when i get to the kitchen where my cheff is preparing dinner i add the wolfsbane to captain jacksons plate. Oh my god i haven't thought this far shit

"Give this plate to that captain jackson" i tell the maid and hurry to the dining room. "Sorry to keep you waiting" i smile and sit across from nell and her husband. "It's fine" nell smiles at me

"I hear you and nell are great friend?" Captain jack says to me as the servants brings us our food. "Yes, we're great friends" i glance towards nell. "Well im glad that nell has found someone to spend time with. I feared she might be lonely without me" fucking ashole

Minute 1

Minute 2

Minute 3

Minute 4

Minute 5

Minute 6

"Are you feeling alright honey?" Nell asks her husband with a concerned face. "Im fine im just a bit drowsy" shit i need to get nell out of here. "One of my servants amber is great with medicine im sure she'll have somthing for you" i say to them "really?" God she sounds hopeful "yes i just don't know where sir Humphrey has ran off to" i look around the room. "I'll go get her myselfs" nell quickly gets up and walks off to find amber.

Amber was my brothers mistress, she jumped in front off a train 5 years ago

1

2

3

Captain jackson falls over with his face in his plate. Shit okay. I quickly get up and dragg him down to my wine cellar. I still dont know why my father had a cage put in here but atleast it comes to my advantage today.

I quickly putt him in the cage and run back up the stairs to the dining room exactly 5 seconds before nell walks back in. "I cant find her- where's captain jackson?" I look up at her "oh he went to lie down" i smile at her "where?" "In the guest room" for once stop being so pushy nell jackson "I think it's best if we go home, for him" nell sighed. "Do you love him?" She looks me confused "of course i do he's my husband"

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////__////////////////

"You should take some wine with you!" I smile "i have plenty" nell smiles "thank you" i return the smile and lead her to the wine cellar and open the door following down the stairs behind her.

Shit how do i always find myself in these predicaments. How do i do this without nell dropkicking me againts a wall? To say my anxiety grew as we walks down the stairs is an understatement.

It takes nell an entire half of a second to see her husband in a cage. Stopping dead in her tracks. Time to act fast. I quickly grab a full wine bottle off of the racks lining the walls. I can see her slowly starting to turn around to face me.

"No one will ever love you like i do nell"

Not a fluent thought goes through my mind as i hit her ever the head with the bottle, knocking her out cold.

[needtorefrigerate]

Can you get food poisoning from pasta?

Can you get food poisoning from pasta?

How quickly does food poisoning kick in?

How long does food poisoning from pasta last?

What are the six signs of food poisoning?

How long does it take to get food poisoning from pasta?

Can you get food poisoning from cold pasta?

Can reheated pasta give you food poisoning?

[not-that-dillinger]

(for the kidnapped prompts) “Are you awake?” Violet asked, her voice absolutely exhausted. She had only just woken up, not sure how long she had been here or how long she had been asleep for. She sighed, rolling her eyes after examining her surroundings. This seemed like a place she’d love to explore if only she were here by her own free will.

Ed groaned, his eyes fluttering open.

Everything hurt.

He squeezed his eyes shut and draped an arm over them to block out the light. This was the worst hangover he'd had in a long time.

...Except he didn't remember drinking anything.

Not hungover. Drugged, he realized. And not his anxiety medicine, nor the usual poison that he'd kicked the habit of years ago.

It took him a moment to process what happened.

He'd been at the big tech conference in Boston, and there was that fancy social dinner at the end of the first day that he hated but unfortunately had to attend because fuck whoever at Encom decided those sorts of things should be mandatory for socializing and networking, especially on the first day when he had barely gotten to Boston less than 24 hours prior, was still jetlagged to shit, and then had a full day where he couldn't escape to find five minutes alone to himself.

So fine, maybe it was an Ed problem, but who's dumb idea was it to voluntell him onto this ridiculous business trip? Ah, Ed spends all his time alone in his office coding. He needs to spend more time socializing. A conference will be good for him.

Ed had stepped out of the stupid, fancy ballroom that the dinner was being held in, out of social spoons and quickly running out of spoons that were meant for other tasks. He had also been feeling nauseous, and couldn't tell if it was a food allergy something on his plate had been in contact with, or something else.

He barely remembered what happened after that. Someone had come up from behind him, asked him if he was alright. Ed had answered in the affirmative, claiming he needed air. The other responded 'good,' and then grabbed him, just as he processed who the voice belonged to: his father's assistant.

Peter pressed a wet cloth over his nose and mouth, and then... blackness.

"No," Ed groused, vaguely recognizing the voice that was talking to him.

Flynn's kid. Whatever his father wanted with her was decidedly not good.

"Does it count if I wish I weren't?" Regardless, he dropped his arm, and propped himself into a sitting position, and hands sweeping the cold tile floor beneath him in search of his glasses.

No glasses. An old tactic. Typical. Unfortunately, he was blind without them, so that would make getting out... challenging.

Tile. They'd moved them from the hotel to somewhere else.

He checked his pockets. Wallet, cellphone, and keys were all gone. No surprise there.

"We need to figure out how to get out of here, now," he finally said. "I need you to describe the room we're in in as much detail as possible.

[sweetlikehoneystingslikeabee]

Does Waylon have any real friends among the rogues? I'm kind of sappy so I like to imagine that, if he does and he has an s/o--and so does the rogue-- they go out on double dates or host dinners and such, esp since your version can cook really well.

"Friends of Killer Croc"

Oh my god. That's so cute. Please feel free to request someone specific if you want a full scenario! (On my list of characters I write for, anyways)

Tw: none

- I think first and foremost, Waylon is friends with Oswald. In many different variations of the characters, Oswald Cobblepot is a rather odd looking character and/or outright disabled himself. If you are disabled, you know what I mean when I say you tend to find friends in other people who are too. Even if it's not the same, it's finding people who relate and understand what it means to be different.

Oswald understands that in spades and is probably one of the few people who didn't immediately curl away in horror when they first met. The only somewhat big thing they disagree on is how to prepare fish which can impact dinner plans.

- Another friend is June Moon. I love their romantic relationship they sometimes have in the comics and I feel if nothing else, they would be good friends. Again, she didn't shirk away from him in any kind of fear (other than perhaps initial shock og how Big the man is). They both struggle dealing with a darker side of themselves and talk a lot about it. Sometimes, they've even done their best to be the Voice Of Reason for each other.

She is a Baby when it comes to spice but tries to suffer through it if it comes to double dates because she knows Waylon's cooking is good. She will regret this later.

- He and Bane are workout buddies. At first it was because no one else could really keep up with them. Then they started spotting each other and actually talking... They have pretty different backgrounds but they relate in that people tend to get nervous around them as huge "scary" men.

He teaches Bane French sometimes and Bane will teach him bits of Spanish.

And with food? Oh my god these two could put away an insane amount of food between them both. Bane can't cook for shit so he is in awe over what Killer Croc can do. That's... sort of what happens when you grow up in a prison with no real life home skills. Waylon might try to convince him to take a cooking class or teach him things himself.

- perhaps surprising (or not) Poison Ivy. They have a natural chemistry that comes from the flora/fauna relationship. He just feels... at ease when she's around. She doesn't treat him like he's stupid because he doesn't have the same level of education she does. Some of her more aggressive plants seem to like him.

For dinners, she likes to bring him fresh herbs and spices she grew herself. Adds that extra kick and he loves the smell it brings to the home. If he's got scraps, he'll wrap it up to feed to her carnivorous plants.

- Harley. In short, it's because Harley is friends with almost everyone. She's that likable. She's also going to help him with cooking which turns very messy very quickly. But it's all good fun.

[butleroftoast]

I AM NOT DONE WITH POL MORRIS

-

Morris tests food for the rat pack while in his rat wildshape. With his past experience, he's usually pretty good at noticing obvious poisons before ingesting them, but sometimes the only option is to eat the food and see what happens. This has occasionally resulted in him abruptly leaving his wildshape (after being reduced to 0 HP in his rat form) and being horribly ill for the rest of the week.

Also imagining a kindly stranger coming across him, quickly noticing he's not right. Offers him some medicine or chicken soup or something. Morris turns everything down, it's just something he ate.

"What was it you ate?" "...rat poison." "...okay. Accidentally spilled it in food, or--" "No." "Right. I'm leaving now."

(This probably contributes to how he remains unhealthily thin when he eats so much at every opportunity.)

-

His favourite wildshapes for various purposes are as follows:

General: Rat, frog.

Swimming: Crab, eel.

Flight: Parrot, fly.

He favours the fly mostly because not many people question a fly hanging around, but also because it has the potential to be incredibly annoying for people he doesn't like.

He does use horse forms for travel on occasion, but if you ask whether you can ride him, expect a tonne of shire horse to kick you in the chest.

If he ever encountered a camel, that would immediately become his new default form for travel. There's something appealing to him about being granted license to spit at will.

If someone tells him to go hurry up when he's going somewhere, he will wildshape into a slug.

He doesn't like wildshaping into anything much bigger than he is. He will do it when necessary, usually in combat, but he doesn't enjoy it. Much smaller is fine. This is not due to the change in perspective and senses, which is par for the course as a druid - it's more about the process of the change itself. Think of it as the difference between folding or stretching a piece of cloth. You can fold it and then shake it out again easily, but stretching it requires more effort, and once stretched it's harder to return it to its original form.

[menacetosocietyy]

Semi-heavy word vomit-vent-info dump thing ahead. Did this on my phone so apologies in advance.

Today I learned that people with my disorder likely experience emotions more intensely than anyone else (generally).

In my poetry, I often express/describe feeling my emotions in extremes, so I mean... it makes sense. Yet part of me is defeated by this confirmation; I'm not quite sure why-

I'm just so burned out today from college and likely other stressors like being threatened to get kicked out again for getting food poisoning and I basically am failing college currently, plus some other more personal things, along with likely needing to get checked for autism and an ED.

I guess a part of me does desire to be "normal." Not traumatized, neurodivergent, and mentally disabled because maybe then I wouldn't be struggling so much. I could have a job and be in school at the same time without having a breakdown, I could push myself to do what I need to without medications, I could live life without needing to fixate on things like fictional universes/characters to not lose my marbles, I could express and manage my emotions properly.

I am grateful to be able to relate the groups of people that I can because of my disability, disorders, and trauma. It's given me the ability to make so many different kinds of connections, help people, and be a better person myself. I'm grateful for being born into a home that got me therapy when I needed it and I credit that to likely the largest chunk of who I am today, but if I am part of the group that feels emotions to the most extreme, and we do it basically on a day to day basis? Fuck dude, ADHD is already known to cause imbalance in emotions, impulsiveness, destructive behaviours- all the things in common with borderline.

Did I just get double-fuckin-whammied??

I would not wish the pain I can feel on anyone (except abusers and pedos and grapeists and-). It is so frustrating to constantly have your mood fluctuating or just randomly be numb for however long when you so desperately want to feel something good AND stable, not just a stable mood of emptiness.

Then, to have people point it out because of concern when you didn't even know you were doing something like changing moods so quickly... it's humiliating for me. They say that the disorders should not be our entire personality, yet they affect literally every aspect of our personalities. How are they not??

Did I mention how fucking TERRIBLE humiliation is?? I can't even put into words right now how much I LOATHE being humiliated and/or ashamed. It causes me to physically twitch and make little noises or whistle. I hate it.

Anyway

Of course, since I get the LOW lows, I also get the HIGH highs... it's probably why I, and so many others, write about love so much. It's such an intense, raw, euphoric, and disastrous feeling.

The human emotions, to me, are probably the most beautiful thing in the world and they fucking suck.

[outivv]

Studying with the first years drop it rn or I'm eating ur dry wall

Synopsis: studying with first years >:)

Warnings: swearing, and not proofread

Game/ fandom: twisted wonderland

Characters: first years (ace, deuce, Jack, epel, and Sebek)

Pronouns for reader: gender neutral/ not mentioned

Note: this is just for fun, but I do apologize if they’re slightly ooc

A/n: hello! Don’t eat drywall it’s poisonous D:

— ace —

A menace.

Whining, and complaining the whole time. You aren’t allowed to go to the library together because he’s so loud when studying with you.

You barely get anything done, because he becomes so frustrated so easily. He can’t focus very well either.

Ace: “HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO MAKE A FUCKING LINE GRAPH???”

Mc: “…it’s just a bunch of lines ace.”

You kick him out of ramshackle dorm not long after you start studying.

— deuce —

Oh deuce.

He tries. He really does.

But he gets so frustrated like ace.

He starts off strong, and then just fizzles out like a sad sad candle.

Deuce: “why does there have to be letters in math…”

Mc sobbing: “I don’t know deuce… I really don’t”

He does study much better with someone with him though. Makes him stay on task oddly enough, and he asks a fair amount of questions! And when you’re right there it makes it much easier!

— Jack —

Loves studying with you, but acts like he doesn’t.

Literally such a good student it’s weird.

Mc: “you actually listen during class… I just screw off with ace and deuce…”

Jack: “you’re a disappointment.” /j

His tail will sway back and forth when you ask him a question. He feels so proud when he gets to teach you something, or just help you out with something.

If you fool around a bit too much he’ll tell you to quiet down, but won’t tell you to leave, nor will he stop studying with you.

— epel —

Could go one of two ways…

Either you both do great! You study for an hour or two, and actually stay on task and did really really well! And then you go get some food as a reward for yourselves when you’re done! :)

Or you both end up so frustrated you scream in the middle of the library, and get kicked out for the day.

Epel: “MATH IS A BITCH”

Mc: “FUCK YEAH”

Librarian: “…get out…”

It’s one or the other. No in between.

— Sebek —

Mmm… ಠ_ಠ

A prick.

You easily get off task? Hmm… hope your eardrums survive his very, very loud lecture.

Sebek: “HUMAN YOU NEED TO FOCUS AND WORK HARD TO PASS THIS CLASS, DO YOU NOT WANT TO GRADUATE???”

Mc sobbing: “stop yelling at me.“

He will make sure you study, and he will get his work done way way faster than you, so he can focus on helping you. It’s sweet but also damn dude… you just went through a weeks worth of homework in an hour.

— everyone :) —

You all study at ramshackle dorm. It’s nice an cozy, even if the wind blows through the dorm.

It turns not cozy real quickly though

I can see Sebek and deuce just yelling at each other honestly.

Deuce: “THIS IS SO FUCKING DUMB”

Sebek: “STOP SWEARING”

Jack and epel are actually doing their work, and working together on something.

Ace and grim are struggling together cause they don’t know how to solve for X

It’s chaos. But eventually… it all works out. Mostly because epel and Jack helped everyone. :’)

After everyone calms down it’s actually really nice, and helpful! And surprisingly people get a fair amount of work done! :D

[bestjeanistmonster]

Okay this anon ask got deleted but:

Liones sister headcanons?

Okay so:

- Elizabeth: Gaslight, Veronica: Gatekeep, Margaret: Girlboss

- they can’t leave Elizabeth alone for one second, one sec she’s in the gardens and the next she’s on top of the castle with a knights helmet and a blanket fashioned into a parachute.

yes she still does it as a teenager, and she still does it when she’s married to Meliodas, giving the demon a heart attack

- Veronica is lactose intolerant and always glares at Margaret and Elizabeth when they eat cheese in front of her

- Margaret was once dancing in the halls, Gil trailing after her and accidentally knocked over a family heirloom vase, she and Gil quickly collected all of the broken pieces and attempted to glue it back together

They didn’t manage to piece it make together and still haven’t to this day. On very slow days they pull it out and make another attempt at it only to be stumped but they haven’t given up hope

Baltra still has no idea what happened to that case

- Elizabeth used to see everything her sisters said as gospel. Veronica has used this to her advantage many times to get Ellie to believe so many lies, some the poor girl still believes to this day.

Elizabeth’s eyes snapped open one morning and just sits up immediately, startling Meliodas, who had been sleeping on top of her, awake.

“Wah, uh Ellie, you okay?”

“…Trolls don’t actually steal socks, do they?”

“…no?”

“Oh.”

Silence

“VERONICA!!!!”

- Veronica kicked Howser in the balls once while protecting Griamore

He cried

- they tried making Baltra a birthday breakfast of pancakes and gave him food poisoning.

- it’s a common occurrence for Margaret to go back to her room after a long day of duties just to find that Veronica and Elizabeth had taken over her bed

- the only reason that Veronica still goes to royal balls is because of the tiny food and to keep creepy nobles away from her sisters. She will straight up grab a tray of food and hide under the snack table obscured from few cuz of the silk covers on it and only emerge to throw hands

- Veronica taught Elizabeth how to use a knife in an emergency (stab, twist, pull out and run), Elizabeth now always has a dagger on her person at all times

- Elizabeth used to try to sneak animals into the castle all the time cuz she thought they needed a home.

- Griamore always manages to get Veronica the best gifts

Griamore, 16: um, happy birthday princess Veronica (hands her a very long and very heavy box)

Veronica who just turned 16, rips open the wrapping and opens the box, inside there’s a giant claymore:

Griamore: I noticed you looking at some of these swords while we were at the blacksmith, so I thought it would make a good weapon to use after your training

Veronica:

Griamore, nervously: um do you lik-

Veronica: I would die for you

Griamore: wha-

- You can tell what Margaret’s mood is depending on what type of tea she’s drinking

- Margaret is the only one who knows about the secret passageways inside the castle apart from Baltra, she uses them so she’s never late

- Elizabeth has on many occasions attempted to dnesk into the stables to go out on a nighttime adventure on her horse and she has been caught everytime before she’s even able to step foot in the stables

- Elizabeth learnt how to pick locks as a kid from Ban, Margaret was so very distressed by this

- Margaret is incredibly busy all the time due to being the heir to the throne, the castle strategist and a princess in general

- Veronica adopted a chimera once and it burned Margaret’s curtains

- Veronica’s nickname is ‘Ronnie’ but only close family can call her that

- Margaret’s nickname is ‘Mar’

- Veronica is a total tsundere when it comes to hugs

- Once Elizabeth got her memories back and the whole war thing was resolved it was incredibly awkward between them, cuz they’re baby sister is apparently a goddess that thousands of years old.

They have a talk about it and resolve everything, she’ll still be their baby sister at the end of the day

- Elizabeth sometimes just comes out of nowhere to swoop in on her wings and carry them off, with no warning

- Margaret punched Vivian and Gilthunder found that attractive

Her hand hurt like a bitch afterwards

- Elizabeth picked a fight with a pelican and lost

- Margaret doesn’t like too much excitement in her free time and would much prefer to relax at the spa

- Margaret can run in heels

- Veronica has stabbed with heels

[powdermelonkeg]

We’ve heard about cultural differences between the Links, where’s the physiological differences?

Sly for example. It wouldn’t make sense for Skyloftians to have a higher blood saturation, and it’d make them even more sleepy on the surface

Maybe everyone in Wind’s time is shorter, to make it easier for body heat to dissipate across their bodies, their skins darker

One the one hand, Hyrule’s above average night vision is a blessing coupled with his ability to see further away is a blessing. On the other, his lower bone density leads to some fussing from the others

And don’t get me started on immunisation, they travel across time and space, how are they not dead from the flu already

I assume you mean in context of Linked Universe, and I am taking this more seriously than you probably meant.

Being up in the clouds means you'd need more oxygen, so Sky's got bigger lungs. He also has to devote more energy into using said lungs, as well as being capable of a veeeeery limited form of Hylian telepathy, hence the stamina gauge (I like the blood saturation theory, but I haven't researched that enough to go with it). His appendix still does what it's supposed to, which is why he starts with six hearts (thanks @amamillalatortilla). Also worth noting, the high altitude means his voice carries better, so he'd be naturally quieter than the others.

Four's is more of a personal difference; his body adapted to the Minish portals, so he never developed any growth spurts past the first time he jumped into one.

Time did the opposite; the repeated time travel kicked him into overdrive, and he hit all his growth spurts early and intensely. Combine that with the Fierce Deity mask, and...yeah. Tall boi.

Legend and Twilight, having swapped between dimensions and forms a LOT, are more highly attuned to sensing rifts between said worlds than others, and can sort of feel when spirits are around. Not nearly as intensely as Wild can with hidden Koroks, but they can tell pretty well when something's awry.

Legend has a resistance to magic, too, but that's more a result of using magic so often than something that happened to him naturally.

Twilight's naturally stronger than the others, on account of his farm work growing up. Time's equal now, thanks to Malon, but when he was a kid, he had jelly arms and couldn't even pick bomb flowers.

Hyrule and Wild have the strongest immune systems, and Wild's Hylians have the fastest reflexes, due to the sheer amount of wild territory and monsters the two have had to brave.

Speaking of Wild, the shrine of resurrection didn't fix him totally; because of the amount of injuries he sustained, he tires out much more easily than the others, and compensates with stamina vessels.

The toon styling of Wind Waker is more of a perspective change, otherwise we'd see a more on-model Master Sword. However, Wind's got a good eye for the weather; he and Sky can pretty accurately predict what the forecast is for the day! Wind himself doesn't dive, but the people of his era, human and Hylian alike, have larger spleens to allow them to dive further.

Ironically, Warriors is the most "normal" Hylian of the bunch, closer to Hyrule's civilian population in ability.

For my boys, because I want to gush about them:

Piper's Hylians are VERY magic sensitive; they live and utilize magic so often in the form of the Spirit Tracks that any area without it seems unnaturally quiet, like when you turn off white noise. They also burn off excess magic when particularly excited in the form of Force Gems, which feeds into the tracks to be grounded out in extensions of it. It makes kind of a feedback loop where the tracks are slowly spreading out as long as there's good in the world.

Taps' Hylians are still adapting from the Sky era conditions. Their appendixes still work. They do better in higher altitudes than lower ones, and they can go into shock if they switch altitudes too quickly without practice due to their lungs panicking and trying to expand like they were built to. That'll fade out more and more in subsequent generations as Hylians become more accustomed to the surface.

Soldier's got more stamina than Wild due to the Shrine of Ressurection shenanigans, but a lower immune system. He and Wild are otherwise physically identical, so there isn't much else to say there.

Fox is by far the fragile outlier; the only human of the bunch, he's got lower stamina and lower resilience against attacks, but intense training to be a hero has compensated a little bit. Get that boy some heart containers.

Cadenza lives with intense telepathic synthesia, so he's got REALLY good hearing compared to the others at the cost of clumsiness whenever he misses a "beat." Telepathic synthesia is a common condition to have in his time, in varying degrees, so you'd be hard pressed to find someone that isn't tapping their foot to some invisible beat. He's also exhausted his adrenaline response due to the deaths-and-Fate interaction.

Now for general Hylian stuffs:

Fairies cure illnesses, as evidenced with Wind's grandma, and all the Links have at some point touched a fairy. That's how they resist viruses they wouldn't have otherwise developed immunity against.

They're also highly resistant to poisons, burns, frostbite, and electric shock. Not only do they survive elemental magic attacks often, but they can get struck by lightning, fight off toxins inflicted by plants, fog, mud, and bad food in seconds, and walk into active volcanoes with no respiratory damage whatsoever.

They're designed to pull more nutrition out of food than humans are, and as such, they can go longer without eating, have smaller stomachs, and can restore their energy with a simple bottle of milk.

They have good night vision, able to see in varying degrees in complete darkness. The best night vision of the bunch goes to Sky, and the worst goes to Hyrule, but even Hyrule's level of night vision lets him see himself and various enemies, suggesting that there's an element of motion detection to Hylian vision (don't move and he can't see us)!

Hylians have stronger bones than we do. While they do take damage from high falls, they don't sustain any long term injuries from it, even when they're at the point of death (like Wild). This means the damage they get from a fall is a lot more likely to be to their muscle tissue, so sprains and deep bruises. That could also be why Stalfos stick around for so long!

[mac-kd8]

                                                 Law x pregnant readers

Waking up, (Name) only felt tired as if she hadn't slept in months.  She  just blamed it from the late nights of working and nothing else. Not even realizing when she woke up it was already in the afternoon and the Heart Pirates were currently eating in the galley.

With a loud groan (Name) took off her Pj's and walked into the shower, she gasped slightly when the water presser felt a little more sensitive on her chest than usual.

(Name) shrugged it off, thinking it was because she was still healing from the last battle she took part of, so she didn't think much about it. Propping herself next to her captain like she always does, she quietly ate her late lunch while trying to keep her eyes open. Law being the observant man he is, grew quite worried about his beloved wife acting so fatigue. "Are you alright?" Law asked, trying to act he wasn't concerned. She only nodded before face-planting into her food with a loud smack. No one panicked or thought it was something to worry about, guessing (Name) was just having a narcoleptic attack.

Later that day, (Name) was currently laying on her bed while reading a book. Feeling like she was about to throw up, she put down her book next to her and quickly opened the bathroom door. She then puke out all of her lunch and maybe last night dinner as well into the toilet. Wipeing her mouth, (Name) then headed toward the sink to splash some cold water on her face.

Feeling a familiar presence, (Name) then turned her head to where Law was currently standing with a worried expression on his face. "Are you okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, I guess it's just a little food poisoning." (Name) said while scratching the back of her head.

"Alright but let me know when it gets worse."Law stated as he exited the bathroom.

(Name's) heart almost escaped from her chest when the submarine started shaking and yellow lights started flashing. Running onto the deck she could already see a battle taking place with men in white and blue uniforms on one side and men in colorful hats and white overalls on the other side. Unsheathing her twin katanas, (Name) then started cutting one marine after another but for some strange reason she already felt like she was out of energy. 20 minutes into the battle, with a large pant for air she finishes off the last of the marines before wobbling back to the submarine's doors.

"Damn why am I already out of breath, those marines were just small fries. My training methods haven't changed one bit, why do I feel so weak. "(Name) muttered to herself in annoyance.

(Name) only pushed her food around on the plate, hardly nibbling then she looked around the room. Everyone was so cheerful and she couldn't help but smile.

"Not eating much I see." Law commented, leaning over to whisper in her ear. Not like he needs to, over the usually loud noise that the Heart Pirates made at each meal.

"I'm just not hungry." She responded.

"Strange and I thought for someone who was out of breath just by fighting a few marines would be starving." Law stated in a matter-of-factly tone.

"Is it not to your liking, (Name)?" The head chef asked, catching sight of Law's actions.

"It's good. I'm just not hungry right now"(Name) said as she pushed back the plate.

"I'll put it in the fridge until you feel like eating again,"The chef said as he scooped up her plate of uneaten food.

"Do you need to lie down again?" Law asked her again for the third time today.

"I'm okay."

"Could I get some orange juice though?"(Name) sweetly asked the cook.

Then immediately , the crew got back to their usual antics paying no mind to (Name's) odd behavior.

She got to her feet while squeezing Law's shoulder gently. "I'm going to read a book." She said before taking a sip of the juice.

She was hoping that it was simply a case of stomach flu and not something alot more serious.

(Name) was once again in the bathroom and vomiting all of what she ate yesterday, which was not that much. (Name) felt terrible , as would anyone in these types of situations would, however, she still didn't want to bring the matter up. Luckily, Law hasn't woken up from his deep slumber , which made her sigh in relief. Slipping back into bed, she then let her eyelids close as she slept all the way through the afternoon again.

Then that cycle of having no appetite and vomiting lasted for this day as well, which made Law start to worry even more about his wife.

"(Name)!" She picked up her head by the ship's railing in surprise as she heard her name being called by Penguin. Her stomach hadn't seemed to settle, and now she is throwing up into the sea.

She then turned her head to the mechanic, trying her best not to look sick.

Penguin walked up to (Name) getting rather closer, causing (Name) to become nervous.

"You look pale." Penguin commented.

"I haven't been feeling well the last few days Penguin. So I'm probably a bit pale." (Name) stated .

"You're sick (Name)?" questioned Shachi. (Name) nodded her head, however quickly realized what she had brought up.

"I'm only slightly sick, just a little headache. Really."

"You sure (Name)?" Law asked as he walked up to the swordswoman, worried about her health.

She then gave a reassuring thumbs up to everyone to show that she was okay. Though internally, she was kicking herself for lying to the crew, even more so to her trusting and loving husband. The crew soon believed the lie as they continued with their day, however, Penguin, Shachi, and Law didn't seem to be convinced, so they kept an eye on her.

"Damn it, damn it, damn it." (Name) thought as she ran to the bathroom for the third time this week. She still was getting lucky with Law having once again already left their room or sleeping, but she knew that it was only a matter of time before they really began to be suspicious.

"This will pass. This will pass."(Name) kept telling herself furiously as she finished with her recent vomiting episode. She picked herself up, taking in deep breaths trying to settle her stomach. As she looked into the mirror, she noticed that she is even paler than yesterday.

Putting on a brave face, she then walked out of the bathroom and went onto the deck.

"Land ahoy!" Shachi shouted as he pointed at the piece of land.

All of the Heart Pirates gather around the railing in a disorderly long line, and lean over it, while watching the island they were about to dock. They had docked at a unique island well-known in the areas as vicious wild blood thirsty animals live there.

"Yahoo, a new adventure!" (Name) said happily before walking off the submarine's plank. As she got closer and closer onto the island, she felt someone grabbing her shoulder.

"I think it's for the best if you stay back in your current state."Law stated with a worried look on his face.

She only shrugged his hand off. "I'm fine, I feel a lot better today."

Before Law could protest, (Name) had already made her way onto the island.

And then she left, not running, but walking kinda in a slow pace into the forests.

After some time had passed, both Penguin and Shachi had returned after a troublesome adventure with some saber-tooth monkeys. Law was starting to get a little worry since (Name) wasn't back yet, so he went the same direction she walked in.

As Law walked deeper and deeper into the forest he finally made eye contact with the swordswoman. "Help!" (Name) called out as she was kneeling onto the tall grass while clenching her slightly bleeding shoulder.

Law was surprised, (Name) never called for help unless it's something really serious or life-threatening .

Activating his Room he switches places with (Name) while killing the beast in the process.

While Law was carrying (Name) through the forest, she leaned away from his chest so she wouldn't get vomit onto his clothes

-x-

"I'm going to take a blood sample." (Name) nodded as she rolled up her sleeve allowing Law to apply the alcohol onto her skin then inserting the needle. Only taking a tiny amount, Law removed the needle and quickly placed a band-aid on where he poke her. "You can leave, I will give you your results as soon as possible."

She only nodded before leaving the infirmary room.

Law stood there from where he was sitting in shock, not knowing how to feel after reviewing the results of her blood test. It was a mix of happiness, relief, fear and mostly parental love. It took all of his strength not to jump down like a crazy man who just won the lottery, because it was the middle of the night and he didn't want to wake up his crew. When he finally made it to the doors of his room, he put on a calm face and slowly and quietly opened the door. "Hi Captain, so did my blood test turn out good?" (Name) asked casually.

"Yep, it seems that both of you are fine." Law said with a big goofy smile on his usually calm and serious face. (Name) looked at her captain in surprise and in slight confusion, even already knowing the answer. "W-what do you mean the b-both of us?" (Name) managed to stutter out.

"I mean our baby. You're 9 weeks pregnant."

He was in love with (Name), and the idea of her having his baby was ideal to him, but it was still a shock, they'd never even spoken or brought up the subject. He wanted a family, but the idea still scares him. All the memories of his mother and father, and his little sister Lami all stuck to him. Then, the struggles and problems of them being famous pirates with both of them having large bounties on their heads. And all of the struggles that their child will face as well, everything he, (Name) and his unborn child, everything they will face together suddenly hit him in one go.

"Law I'm sorry, I should have been more careful." (Name) said while sobbing.

Law quickly, but carefully picks her up and sits her onto his lap while stroking the spot where their child was growing.

"Sorry for what? Making this the happiest day of my life." Law said before kissing her still flat stomach.

(Name) began to cry more but it wasn't tears of sadness, they were tears of joy. "We're going to be parents. I'm going to be a mom."

"And I'm going to be a dad. " Law said while showering her with even more kisses. (Name) squeaked when Law gently swooped her off her feet and began sprinting across the metal halls.

"What the... Law?!"

"Your shoulder, your shoulder was wounded. You're staying overnight, no, 3 nights in the infirmary. What if the baby got hurt. What if the baby got killed?"Law started listing off the things that could happen to their unborn child.

-x-

"Everyone, we have an announcement!" Law shouted loudly to get everyone's attention who was on the deck.

"We're getting a new crew member." (Name) said while trying to hold back her giggles.

"Oh, that's nice, when can we meet them?" Penguin asked.

"Less than 9 months." Law answered which made everyone go completely silent.

"We're having a baby!" Both (Name) and Law shouted cheerfully.

They were all staring at the expected couple, completely dumbfounded.

Astounded, flabbergasted, shock whichever word to describe their expressions and the tense atmosphere. Law's hand started to turn purple just by how hard (Name) was squeezing his hand.

"CONGRATULATIONS," Penguin and Shachi shouted in perfect unison.

"This is amazing, this calls for a party!" A Heart Pirate exclaimed.

"No alcohol for the pregnant woman though," Bepo smiled warmly at her from Law's side.

"(Name), don't cry, " Law said, reaching around her shoulders to comfort her.

"I know, it has to be the unbalanced hormones. I'm just so happy, this is a new chapter of my life." (Name) said as she cried into Law's chest.

Throughout the day everyone was partying while congratulating the new parents-to-be.

"So who will be the godparents?" Bepo asked.

"We have already decided that Ikkaku and you will be the godparents of our child."(Name) answered. Bepo then lifted both (Name) and Law off their feet and gave them a big hug while crying tears of joy. "Thank you, I'll be the best godfather ever." Bepo said, which made everyone in the Heart Pirates stare in jealousy, especially Penguin and Shachi.

"You guys will make great uncles." (Name)said with a big smile while hugging both of them in her arms.

"Lucky bear." Shachi muttered.

The 2 mechanics' faces turned a deep shade of red when (Name) kissed both of them on the cheek. "Don't worry, there is enough love to go around."

Then out of nowhere, a large explosion could be heard across the deck.

"Heart Pirates, Give up now or prepare to die."A marine holding a megaphone demanded.

(Name) smirked before unsheathing her twin katanas as she got into a fighting stance.

"Do your worst.''She retorted before Law used his devil fruit ability to transport her back into the sub.

Law shut the metal doors, ignoring the loud banging noises that were coming from the other side.

"Law, you ass, I want to fight too. Let me out, let me out." (Name) demanded as she kept on banging her fist onto the metal door.

"No, as your captain and doctor I order you to stay back and let us handle this. You're pregnant, you need to take it easy for now on."Law stated, which made (Name) slump down in disappointment. She hated being useless, she wanted to fight, she wanted to help, she wanted to do something besides laying down and doing nothing.

"Oh great, 7 more months of being totally useless." (Name) muttered under her breath while sighing.

A few weeks later-

(Name) felt like she was already going crazy. She wasn't allowed to do anything and she meant she couldn't do anything. First, the large weights she and Jean Bart can usually lift with ease have been replaced with 5 pound weights and she wasn't even allowed to use them for more than 5 minutes. Law had also forbidden( name) in certain places in the submarine as well, which was almost one half of the metal vessel that was off limits for her.

(Name) also swears, Law has super hearing because when she decides to get out of her bed, Law uses his devil fruit abilities to teleport himself right next to his wife's side.

"Law, go back to work. I'm just getting a snack."(Name) protested.

"Then ask me or someone else from the crew to get it for you. You're still in your first trimester of pregnancy, there is still a possible chance of miscarriages or physical deformities or all sources of possible medical stated as he called forth his room again then instantly a jar of peanuts appeared in his hand.

"Here, take these and go back to our room." Was all Law said as he pointed the direction of where their room was located, as if she was completely clueless of where she had been living for most of her life.

Rolling eyes (Name) went back to her room while munching down on the jar of peanuts on the way.

-x-

When the Heart Pirates docked onto an island, (Name) thought she could get some alone time to herself while getting the necessary items for the future stages of her pregnancy. And it was a good thing too since her pants and shirt had been feeling tight lately. "Bye Captain, I'm going to do a little shopping." (Name) said before she jumped off the submarine's front deck.

"Room, Shambles." Law now had (Name) in his arms.

"What the hell Law?" (Name) questioned.

"I'm coming with you, " Law stated as he tightly held her hand.

"Law, I'll be just fine. It's just a little shopping, I'm barely showing." (Name) retorted while trying to slip her hand from Law's strong grip.

"Nope, as long as you're carrying my child you're stuck with me." Law said, securitly wrapping around his arm onto her waist.

After 5 medical and clothes stores later, Law's arms were both covered in shopping bags while (Name) just carried a single bag with a small bottle of medicine inside of it.

"Law, let me carry that for you. You know I can lift 1000 times my own body weight." (Name) Stated with an annoyed frown.

"I got this, I don't want you to lift even one eight of your body weight. Your-" (Name) then cut off Law before he could finish the rest of this statement. "Yeah, Yeah, I know I'm pregnant and pregnant women shouldn't be exerting themselves."

Smirking devilishly, (Name) came up with a small plan to get away from her overbearing husband.

"Hey honey, I really need to use the bathroom."(Name) said as she pretended her bladder was about to burst.

"Very well."He responded, then they headed to the closest bathroom.

Reaching down in her left sock, (Name) grabbed a screwdriver and began unscrewing the bathroom's top window.

When (Name) was finally outside of the building, she began to grin like she has been in prison for 20 years and just now escaped. She was free, she could do whatever she wanted without worrying about Law dragging her back to their room and making her stay there until the next day.

In a swift motion, (Name) unsheathed her twin katanas and blocked an attack from a familiar mask man.

"Yo... it's been a while, when was the last time we fought together."(Name)greeted, enjoying the weight and feel of her swords when fighting. "Too long and this time I will become victorious." Killer responded.

Killer and (name) have been rivals ever since their crew had first met. The 2 of them will always break into fights everytime when they see one another. But so far they're about even, most of the time their fights usually ended up in draws.

The fight soon stopped when Killer stepped away and put back his scythe blades into its case. "Hey what gives, why are you chickening out now! The fight was just about to get better." (Name) shouted.

"I'm not fighting a pregnant woman, I want to kick your ass at your best."Killer stated while pointing to her slightly rounded stomach. "Damn, I knew I should have put on more baggy clothing."(Name) thought to herself as she tried to cover her baby bump.

"You're a pirate, why should you even care? Pirates do whatever they want."(Name) exclaimed while pouting slightly.

"I may be a pirate but I'm still a man who doesn't like fighting weak women." Was all he said before walking away.

"I'm not weak...fight me, please! Law won't even let me hold a fork. Please, I'm only on my 16 week."(Name)whined as she tugged onto Killer's shirt.

"No, and you look alot more further along than that."Killer retorted which made (Name) gasp loudly of being called fat.

Before Killer had any time to dodge, (Name) kicked him square in the balls which made him groan in pain.

"Meanie!" (Name) spat out before taking off into the forest nearby with small tears running down her face.

"Ouch!"He groaned loudly, laying on the ground while holding his sore nuts.

-x-

Law was pissed. But mostly Law was extremely worried. He couldn't find his wife anywhere, but what really worries him is that the Kid Pirate's ship has been spotted as well.

What if the Kid Pirates took advantage of his wife's current state or even worse killed her on the spot.

No matter how much observation Haki Law uses, he didn't have any lead on where his wife is.

"Captain, we know where she is." Penguin reported.

"Yeah, Killer from the Kid Pirates told us she kicked him in the nuts and went into the forest,"Shachi added.

"And why did she kick him in the nuts, (Name) doesn't usually use low blows?"Law stated with a raised eyebrow.

"Well,"Penguin started off while scratching the back of his head.

"He kinda called her fat." Shachi answered.

In a blink of an eye, Law called forth his room and teleported himself into the forest. Without even trying, Law hears small whimpers coming from the top of a tree so he looks up and sees the person he was looking for all day.

"(Name!)Law called out his wife's name.

"Go away!" She screamed then resumed crying again.

"No, I know I've been a little too clingy lately, but it's only because I want the best for you and our future kid as well. And to be fair, I don't really blame you for running away from me, so that is why I promise you I will try my best to give you your space."Law promised as he kneeled down.

(Name) stopped crying and looked at her husband.

"Okay, I'm coming down now."(Name) responded as she started climbing down onto one branch after another.

She gasps when one branch snaps from her weight and she begins to fall, face first into a painfull fall, and Law swears his heart stops for 5 seconds as his throat hitchs.

"Room, shambles!"

When his wife's stomach was only inches away from hitting the hard ground, she instantly appeared in Law's arms.

"Law, I'm sorr-"(Name) whispered her husband's name.

"That was way too close." He then looked and touched her baby bump gently.

"You're never ever leaving my sight until that baby is out of you. That's an order." Was all he said as he started walking back to the sub with his wife in his arms.

-x-

(Name) found herself laying flat on her back in the medical bay as Law prepared the new ultrasound equipment.

"Damn, that's cold." She hissed when the clear gel made contact with her stomach.

"Sorry," he apologised half-heartedly.

"Usually I would just use my scanning ability, but I think it would be a lot more useful to check in like this."Law stated then he turned on the monitor. He moved the device around her stomach slowly with his eyes on the screen, instantly stopped when he saw a gray blob in the middle.

"There's our child."He pointed to the blob.

As (Name) looked closer at the screen, she cock an eyebrow when another blob had suddenly appeared out of nowhere. "Honey, why are there 2 of them?"(Name) stated while pointing where the 2 blobs were located.

"You're just seeing things, there is no-"Law stopped himself when indeed there were more than 1 blob. "We're having twins."Law whispered so softly that (Name) had to ask him to repeat himself.

"We're having twins. Yes,! Now you don't have to get pregnant again."Law said again as his wife just stood there in shock, not knowing how to process the new information.

"Wait, you're not satisfied with one kid." (Name) yelled at her husband in which he only nodded.

"Great. I already get smothered enough with one baby, I'm sure it's gonna get worse."

"It's now double," his lips formed into a smirk. "For now you're going to have daily instead of weekly check ups. And you're no longer allowed to practice swordsmanship with real swords anymore."

"Excuse me? No way, I've been holding swords since I was only 5 years old, you can't do that." She sat up sharply.

"You lost all of your rights when you started carrying precious cargo. Now you must be twice careful with our little ones." He brushed his fingers against her stomach before kissing it gently.

The more (Name-s) belly got bigger and bigger, the more cautious everyone, especially Law became. In only her 30 weeks of pregnancy, (Name) already looks like she could give birth any day now.

The Heart Pirates were currently docked on a winter island while (Name) only watched from a sideline.

"But Law, I want to play in the snow like everyone else. Please, I've been cooped up in this submarine for far too long."(Name) begged while giving Law the puppy eye look.

"Fine, but you need to bundle up."Law exclaimed.

6 layers of thick clothing later, (Name) walked off the Polar tang's deck with Law right next to her side.

Working on her snow fort for about 30 minutes, (Name) started to feel a sneeze coming along and tried her best to hold it in.

"Achoo!" She then covered her mouth, in hopes Law didn't hear it.

She sighs and doesn't even put up a fight when Law's room incases her, and teleports her into his arms.

"You're going back to the sub, I knew it was a bad idea to let you play in the snow."Law stated flatly.

And once again (Name) was laying flat on her back as she watched Law move the ultrasound equipment around her stomach for the fourth time this week.

"Is this really necessary?"(Name) questioned while pouting.

"Yes, unless you don't want our babies to be healthy. You're now forbidden to leave our bed until your cold has subsided. If you break any of those rules then I will bind you to the bed until your pregnancy has ended. Do I make myself clear?" Law questioned which only made (name) stick out her tongue.

"You 2 need to get out of mommy soon because I can't take another minute with your daddy."(Name) talk and rub to her rounded stomach when Law left the room.

-x-

2 weeks later and (Name) Was finally on her last trimester of pregnancy. "Law!" (Name) shouted his name loudly.

"Yes my darling, is there something you need." Law responded as he headed toward where his wife was currently sitting down.

"The babies are kicking, they're kicking again."(Name) said excitedly then grab's Law's hand to guide him where the kicking was happening.

Then the day when his children would be born.

(Name) woke up in the middle of the night when she felt a warm wet substance in between her legs and soon realized her water just broke.

"Law...Law." She shakes her husband awake.

"Yeah, what is it?" He muttered as he tried to rub away the sleep from his eyes.

"My water just broke."She then yelled in agony after she felt a contraction.

"Shit?!" Law then quickly moves to her side to help her into the wheelchair he had laying by for this day. "Bepo, round up the medical squad, it's time." Law shouted through a den den mushi.

"Whatt, I thought she wasn't due for at least another couple weeks." Bepo shouted.

"Well, the kids have decided to come now!" Law stated.

12 hours of shouting and a lot of pushing later, the first one came out.

"She's a beautiful girl!" Law said before handing the bundle of joy to Bepo.

"Come on just one more push." Law said then he could see the head of the baby.

"It's a handsome boy," Law said before handing the other baby to Penguin's arms.

"Law, what should we name them?"(Name) asked as she panted for air.

"Rosey for our baby girl and Corazon for our baby boy." Law answered, then placed a sweet and tender kiss on his wife's forehead.

"You need rest now, I will take care of them in the meantime."