#PwASPD

[basalts-system]

I love my little brother so much.

He has BPD and struggles with accepting when he's wrong about something.

But he like always tells me when hes still in defense mode.

He's always like.

Give me a moment. And then I give him a moment.

Guys it's not hard to Respect pw/pd

Yes, and I shouldn't have to say this, this goes for all pd

Also npd

[perpetuallyanhedonic]

does your thumb ever hover over the send button but realize there’s no point in reaching out and asking how they’re doing cause ultimately they don’t deserve the limited amount of compassion you can spare and that energy is better spent on someone who actually cares about you but you also feel that they don’t care about you either but you also don’t care about the possibility of people not caring about so you just feel frustrated and drained and numb all at the same time and fuck i need to not exist

[devotedsickness]

I know online PD quizzies ain’t shit. But some of the questions for this test are fucking weird. Like what does being interested in art for a magazine cover have anything to do with personality disorders? Lmao

[coolguy8000]

🍊🌊PINNED‼️🍊🌊

HIII IM JOY/LUFFY FROM @spiralofghosts

all you need to know is that this is my sideblog n im trying out he/she/it atm if that changes ill update it here o77777

thumbs up :D ‼️ 👍🏻 👍🏻 👍🏻

[twoheadedfather]

tiktok "leftists" when you ask them to be normal about people with cluster b or paraphilic disorders

[willows-woes]

something i've realised is bpd is almost seen as a "victim disorder" and npd is seen as an "abusive disorder." the fucking ableism in that oh my lord. they're both cluster b personality disorders, and both have extremely high correlation with childhood trauma. they're BOTH ""victims."" people treating pwNPD like horrible people for just Existing and then turning around and treating pwBPD like Poor, Hurt Souls needs to fucking stop.

[meowzet]

BREAKING NEWS: WHAT THE FUCK?

who is asking these questions? i have no joke / punchline to share, just utter confusion.

[aspd-culture]

Aspd culture is listening to someone vent for the 100th time and telling them to kill themselves already cause they’re annoying as FUCK

Massive TW for sui talk here obviously

God this was tough to have pop up as a notification. Whilst I understand the frustration leading there, I can’t condone that kind of thing. I’ve spent way too much time su1c1d4l myself to encourage that. Even with ASPD, we need to be careful of what we’re saying to other people. If this was about thinking it, absolutely I could understand, but doing it? No that’s not ASPD-culture at least not in my eyes. Please don’t tell anyone to hurt themselves. Even if it’s just for the reason of legal liability, don’t do it.

Edit: someone noted a completely valid point here that saying this “isn’t ASPD culture” rather than simply saying that it’s triggering to me and I’m not comfortable having on my particular ASPD culture blog gives off the wrong idea, because this kind of thing does fit the definition of ASPD.

So just to clarify, what I meant here was more in line with the idea that it’s too serious and personal of an issue for me and I’m sure for some pwASPD too who have had this done to them for me to be posting to this blog. I in no way meant to invalidate this as a symptom, because it IS a part of ASPD to have these thoughts and actions. It’s just not something I want to encourage or platform here because of my personal triggers.

Apologies for phrasing it the way I did, it was a post done quickly and in a triggered state and wasn’t thought through as well as the posts I make usually are. In the spirit of honesty and accountability, I’ve added this edit rather than covering the original language. To avoid this issue in the future, I will be deleting posts discussing the action of (not the thought of) telling people to hurt/unalive themselves.

In no way is this apology saying I condone the actions here though. Acknowledging that they are a part of the experience a pwASPD may have with their symptoms is not the same as saying it’s okay, and part of the mistake I made in the first place was believing one was the same as the other.

[autistic-beshelar]

Hey! I'm very interested in what you've told me about antisocial personality disorder, neurodivergence, and empathy vs. compassion so far. I would love to hear more!

hi, sorry this has taken me a bit to get to, i've had a hectic few days, and i knew i'd end up writing a lot!

ASPD:

i'll start by saying that i don't have ASPD, so i'm just going to give the basics and hand you off to people who DO have it. it's important to bear in mind that ASPD is primarily considered traumagenic, and that, like any other disorder, it can manifest in a bunch of different ways, and people with it can behave very differently from one another.

ASPD is a cluster b personality disorder characterised by low empathy, limited range and depth of emotions, disregard for other people's feelings, disregard for societal conventions and morality, chronic anger, and chronic boredom. the common view of pwASPD is that they are violent criminals, but that is primarily because research is only ever done on the worst kinds of people, and i'm sure many of them are misdiagnosed. i'm sure i don't need to explain to you why basing a disorder solely off of people in prison is fucked as a concept, given how both the prison system and psychiatry are both incredibly flawed. (it's also for this reason that i have no scientific studies to give you, because the only ones i've come across are grossly ableist)

having ASPD comes with a lot of challenges, but having a disorder - any disorder - doesn't make you a bad person. from what i have seen, a lot of pwASPD don't so much 'not have morals' as have a deep distrust of authority and base their morality on logic or serving their own interests. in fact i've seen an awful lot of pwASPD who are very left leaning or are anarchists. of course there's also plenty who are right wing assholes, but that kind of goes to show that a disorder doesn't dictate your morality, it just might lead you to approach your sense of morality differently.

ASPD resources, from actual pwASPD:

https://shitborderlinesdo.tumblr.com/post/115096247519/the-anti-social-personality-disorder-checklist

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/your-stories/life-with-antisocial-personality-disorder-aspd/ (cw for mention of csa)

https://inanawesomewave.tumblr.com/post/177638772232/the-bones-of-it

EMPATHY:

my favourite thing to rant about. empathy is wildly misunderstood by most people, so let's start off with a proper description. there are two main types of empathy: cognitive and affective. you will also see some people say that there's a third type, 'compassionate empathy', but i have never seen a definition of it that isn't based on the idea that empathy is necessary for compassion, so i'm ignoring it, and i'll get to compassion later.

cognitive empathy: basically, thinking about feeling. cognitive empathy is the ability to recognise and understand emotions. it is involved with reading people's expressions, or understanding why a certain situation might cause a certain emotional response.

affective empathy: this is typically what people mean when they talk about empathy - the ability to feel what someone else is feeling.

it's extremely important to note that this is fucking impossible. 'feeling what someone else is feeling' is some sci-fi nonsense. it isn't real. the belief that it is causes a lot of harm.

affective empathy, properly defined, is the a person's emotional response to an emotion that they perceive someone else having. it isn't always as simple as 'i'm happy because they're happy'. affective empathy can also be involved in more complicated situations, like feeling afraid because of perceived anger (which leads to a whole conversation about hyperempathy and hypervigilance and the relationship between them, but that's a whole other post that someone who actually has feelings would be more qualified to write)

so that's empathy. it's really just a bunch of feelings that we have about or in relation to other people's feelings. there's no moral component to feelings whatsoever. morality only comes into play when action is involved. which leads me to...

compassion: being kind, not as an inherent state of being, but as a choice.

i'll talk about my own experience here, but i've heard similar from other people with low/no empathy, and i've heard similar from some pwASPD as well.

i choose to be kind because i believe it's the right thing to do. i see a lot of injustice in the world, and it makes me furious - in fact, for me, it's primarily my anger that fuels my compassion. my morals have been based partly on feeling, but also on logic, and on a lot of research. to me, being kind is logical and sensible. it's logical to want people to be happy and safe and free. it benefits me too, for starters.

i don't need to feel sad about people's suffering to want it to stop. and though i don't really feel much empathy, i do still get emotional about things - i can still be sad or angry or happy about certain things happening, it's just... less than other people.

i look at the world around me and i try to find things that i can do to make it better because i think that's my job as a human. sometimes i'm bad at it, and sometimes i'm too tired to, but at the very least i can refuse to cause harm, and when i do, inevitably, cause harm, i can make amends.

(there's also a long discussion to be had about how basing your morality on your ability to empathise with people makes it extremely easy to no longer care about people who have been dehumanised, but that's a post i don't feel qualified to make)

a book i am desperate to read on this subject is Against Empathy by Paul Bloom, but here's an article about it, which is of course not perfect, but makes a lot of interesting points: https://www.vox.com/conversations/2017/1/19/14266230/empathy-morality-ethics-psychology-compassion-paul-bloom

i hope that helps explain some things. if you have - or anyone else has - more questions, feel free to ask, and i'll do my best to answer.

[mischiefmanifold]

I've been wanting to talk more about my ASPD and the symptoms that I experience because of it, but it's been hard for me to explain in a way that feels right to me. Part of it might be anxiety about how others will take what I'm saying and potential misinterpretation, but I think a big part of it is that these symptoms are really not socially acceptable (which is kind of the point).

And while I feel that it's important to discuss these things, a lot of people will have negative knee-jerk reactions to hearing us talk about them. I think maybe that's what I'm worried about, but I don't know.

[pageofheartdj]

Some ableist: *uses npd terms to spread stigma and hate about the disorder*

PwNPD: Hey this harms the community that is already constantly attacked.

Some ableist: OMG SHUT THE FUCK UP NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT YOUR SELFISH ASS YOUR EYES LITERALLY TURN BLACK BECAUSE YOU LOVE HURTING PEOPLE!!!

[scaryinclusive]

oh cool, a diagnosed person with antisocial personality disorder discussing their perspective on life etc etc, hopefully they're not ableist!

their content: how to destroy a narcissist from a sociopath's pov.

[cluster-b-culture-is]

(this ask isnt really meant to be answered but if youd like to or to post about it go ahead)

tw for ableist and abuse mentions

this person called idkpillows has been reblogging your posts (specifically ones that are violent in nature), which it in itself isnt bad, but they believe in borderline, antisocial, and narcissistic abuse. idk exactly why they are reblogging them but i assume to prove that those disorders are "dangerous", and that those kinds of abuse is "real". which.. is really nasty.

idk if you have blocked them yet but if you havent i really suggest doing so since they like infiltrating npd, aspd, and bpd safe spaces in specific

so sorry to bring this bad news but i feel its safer to send this ask than for one of your mods seeing any of their posts without warning.

um yeah thank you for reading this

Eugh, we'll have them blocked right away. Thanks for the heads up, anon; I recommend other folks block them too, just to be safe. (I don't, however, recommend harassing them--even if I did condone harassment (which I don't in any situation), doing so would just prove their point, whatever that may be)

[angeltism]

you guys have to understand I will bite ableists out of love and respect for pwPDs. I won't pretend as though I understand every single experience bc I literally cannawt do that ever however I fit like 75% of the dx criteria on an eery amount of them and although it sucks I know there are people it sucks considerably more for and that just makes me want to punch people who treat pwPDs poorly. repeatedly.

I hope everyone with a PD is doing alright on this fine [time of day] and is alright forever actually and if you aren't alright then I hope things get better for you. You are not a bad person and anyone who tells you that is full of shit and I can hit them or something if you want. I am so so serious w this

[egopathic]

yall cannot seriously be trying to hold someone accountable for internalized sanism they expressed multiple years ago, apologized for and have moved on from.

like do whatever you want but attacking someone who has a cluster b disorder for being against cluster b disorders *before* they worked on self acceptance is really strange.

you aren’t owning the ableists, you’re harassing someone who listened, changed and agrees with you and struggles with the same shit as you lmfao.

[ray-of-melancholy]

Everyone with a cluster b disorder is my friend now ♡♡ /p