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#Redirect Loop
introduceofficial · 1 year
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Redirect Loop
Redirect Loop Redirect Loop, bir web sayfasının sürekli olarak aynı sayfalara yönlendirilmesiyle oluşan hatalı bir durumdur. Bu sorun, SEO performansını olumsuz etkileyebilir. Redirect Loop hatasını çözmek için yönlendirme kurallarını doğru yapılandırmak ve hatalı yönlendirmeleri düzeltmek önemlidir. Yönlendirme döngüsü sorununun çözümü, kullanıcı deneyimini iyileştirir ve web sitesinin…
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napping-sapphic · 1 year
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i want to fall in love in a way that always gives me something positive to think of like i want to love someone so much that i know i can send my thoughts in their direction to calm myself down and get away from everything else for a bit i don’t know i guess i just want something good to think about
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miserablegrl · 5 months
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there's an sick pigeon who i have been trying to take care of for four days already now, i have made him a little shelter outside because unfortunately i cannot keep him inside since i have three canaries and they might get sick as well, the weather is going to be rainy for a week and today he has been refusing to stay in his little shelter and walks in circles not knowing where he is going because he cannot open his eyes. i have tried to call countless numbers but nobody knows shit or they refuse to rescue him because he is sick and he might infect the other animals, i tried calling the absolutely useless police who should be taking care of this but they won't even answer the emergency number. now i feel stressed and sad because i don't know how to help him, as if this wasn't enough the weather is absolute trash and he refuses to stay inside the box, and everyone i called basically told me to just sit and watch him die because apparently this country hates pigeons so much to the point of refusing to help a sick one. surely something could be done to help him but no ones gives a fuck and the ones who do are 4738382 km away. i hope this country explodes
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welp it's still wednesday, so i'm using the excuse to post topology practice on main side :p
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surprising no one, i'm using june as a lab rat xD
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clatterbane · 2 years
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I posted 7,283 times in 2022
388 posts created (5%)
6,895 posts reblogged (95%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@clatterbane
@kelpforestdwellers
@katisconfused
@bluenorther
@kellyclowers
I tagged 5,374 of my posts in 2022
Only 26% of my posts had no tags
#art - 664 posts
#kept tags - 638 posts
#video - 626 posts
#cats - 455 posts
#politics - 407 posts
#long post - 380 posts
#food - 257 posts
#personal - 248 posts
#uk politics - 181 posts
#us politics - 168 posts
Longest Tag: 139 characters
#and it's absolutely fucking infuriating to see posts that are like 'everyone who is [catagory] was treated like ___ & therefore privileged'
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
(via r/disability)
Though, as unsurprisingly already came up in the comments there? I would not necessarily say "ignore" without tacking on "willfully"--in a "not my circus, not my monkeys" sort of way driven by ableism.
95 notes - Posted February 24, 2022
#4
‘Life in a box’: young autistic man confined in hospital’s former file room | News | The Sunday Times
His sectioning is subject to a rolling review and he can be discharged at any time by the doctor in charge of his care. It means the Priory, a private company receiving large amounts of NHS funding for his care, is also in charge of deciding whether he is fit for release. There is no suggestion that Patient A’s funding has had an influence on his care plan at the hospital...
Patient A is stuck inside a system the government vowed to fix in 2011, after the abuse of adults with autism and severe learning disabilities was exposed by the BBC’s flagship investigations programme, Panorama...
In 2015 NHS England launched its Transforming Care programme, which aimed to reduce the number of autistic people and those with learning disabilities in mental health hospitals. But while the number of people with learning difficulties in hospitals has fallen, the number of autistic people in mental health hospitals has risen by 59 per cent since 2015 to 700 (autistic people only), according to NHS figures. When taking into account autistic people with and without learning difficulties, the figures have risen from 1,100 in 2015 to 1,215 today.
“People can deteriorate because the environment is not right for them and that can make their behaviour worse,” said Dan Scorer, Mencap’s policy expert...
Experts say that for those with autism, being confined in a unit such as Patient A’s exacerbates aggressive behaviour. As a result they become trapped in a vicious cycle of overmedication and ever more draconian restrictions on their liberty.
“People with autism can have sensory problems. They need the right space to live in. A nice garden. The correct lighting. A comfortable home,” says Alicia Wood, who has studied the effects of long-term segregation on people with autism and learning disabilities for the government’s oversight panel, led by Baroness Hollins.
Some are left “traumatised” after long-term inpatient care. Moving out can initiate a period of three to six months in which “their behaviour can be extremely challenging.”
108 notes - Posted January 10, 2022
#3
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(Source | Context)
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Everybody forgetting that Gen X exists yet again, with too many years' worth of exasperated snark to contribute! 😅
142 notes - Posted August 3, 2022
#2
PSA for people in Virginia:
More glitches at the DMV. Check your voter registration.
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150 notes - Posted October 21, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
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Speaking of the goat!
Free crochet pattern:
391 notes - Posted December 12, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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gravityrooom · 26 days
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brydig · 5 months
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It's so hard to get ahold of some academic literature that I LITERALLY HAVE ACCESS TO THROUGH MY INSTITUTION that libgen is often less of a hassle. Why is it like this
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kingdom-falls · 1 year
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Today's a Wind Waker kind of day
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thexsilentxwordsmith · 2 months
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Simon "Ghost" Riley x Fem!reader
Summary: Lt. Riley sure has been taking a lot of smoke breaks lately. Strange that you always seem to disappear at the same time too.
Author's Note: Just a quick little one shot I came up with to get me back into the swing of things and give you all a little snack for what's to come.
“Again?” Soap questions as he watches the lieutenant stand up from the back of the table, cigarette pack in hand. “Ye have a real problem mate. Swear yer married te those things these days, always havin’ te go out fer another smoke. Ye should get some help fer yer addiction, L.T.”
Lt. Riley doesn’t stop to reply, moving his chair back in without missing a beat. “Maybe I’m just tryin’ ta have an excuse to fuckin’ leave so ya can’t persuade me into stayin’ for more of your inane drivel,” he returns dryly. “ ‘Sides, it’s gettin’ late.”
Soap rolls his eyes skeptically at the statement. “Whatever ye say,” he chuckles, brushing off the comment like nothing and letting the lieutenant walk off without consequence, something rare for the mouthy sergeant, but Lt. Riley is too preoccupied to pay it much attention.
From your place at the table, you carefully sneak glances to watch as the hulking form of your superior locks eyes with you for only a second before he makes his way over to the door of the mess hall and opens it to step out into the night air. You force yourself not to linger too long in his direction, redirecting your attention back to your fellow operatives that still sit around you chatting even though dinner had ended some time ago.
It doesn’t take long for the conversation to pick right back up where it left off, though you stay silent as you slowly try to fade yourself out of the group without anyone noticing your absence. The heated topic of the best explosive types has everyone engaged and you see your opportunity to leave and slip out undetected.
Too bad you don't notice a couple eyes dart your way before they turn back to one another to share a knowing look and a smirk. Yet nothing is said out loud and you make it out with incident.
Stepping out into the cool night, you find it odd that there are no signs of life near the door, no 6’4” military officer propped against the brick smoking. The unexpected absence makes your heart leap, but as you let your eyes adjust to the dark you catch movement off to your side. At the edge of the building you can just make out the dissipating wispy trail of vapor as it floats up towards the sky. Bingo, that’s what you are looking for. Turning your feet in the direction of the smoke, you make your way over, the soles of your shoes crunching over the gravel scattered along the ground and echoing off the walls of the building. You don’t have far to go and as soon as your body rounds the corner, your wrist is grabbed up by long fingers into the palm of a large, rough hand.
You know this grip intimately.
“Lookin’ for somethin’, pretty girl?” the familiar gruff voice hits your ears as your body is pushed back first into the rough surface of the wall.
Tilting your head up, you look directly into that skull-masked face and instantaneously a smile spreads across your lips. “Was looking for someone, actually,” you answer confidently, a bit of playfulness to your tone.
Hooking your thumbs through the front belt loops on his jeans, you pull him in closer so that he is pinned against you. “And wouldn’t you know, I just found him,” you say.
Fuck, did you have to play on his one weakness so early?
“Was wonderin’ when you’d fuckin’ break away,” he chuckles to disguise that fact that your little maneuver has caused his pulse to race violently through his veins.
Those large, greedy hands find their place on the curve of your hips and he wonders if you can feel his thudding heartbeat through his touch as he stands there in the silence with you. He’s waiting patiently for what comes next, the simple ritual you've developed that you put into practice whenever you’re alone together. Right now he is still under the guise of Ghost and only you can bring out the man behind the mask.
Searching his chest to find the neckline of his shirt, you dig your fingers inside and find the edge of the fabric keeping his face hidden from you. You tug at the balaclava to free it before you pull it up and off his features, bunching it together and pushing it to the top of his head so that he wears it like a beanie. And suddenly there he is: not Ghost, not Lt. Riley, but Simon, your Simon in the flesh once again.
“Didn’t want to make it too obvious,” you return as you take him all in, fingertips following the line of his cheek, “the others aren’t that oblivious; they’ll put two and two together if given enough clues. We could get caught, you know. How long till they figure out that I always seem to go missing whenever you go for a smoke?”
There is a coolness on your hip now as one of his hands finds its way around the back of your neck to hold you in place as his thumb smoothly caresses over the delicate skin of your cheek in long, slow strokes. “Don’t care anymore,” he mutters as his gaze lingers at your eyes before they drift down to your full lips. There is a yearning in his chest watching them part as he drags that same thumb heavily across the length and it blooms as he hears the quiet sigh you release at feeling his touch over that sensitive bit of skin.
“It’s gettin’ harder and harder ta keep my hands to myself whenever you’re ‘round.”
He leans in as he holds you steady by the back of the head, his face getting closer and closer until his balmy breath wafts over your bottom lip. It’s intoxicating the way the presence of your mouth lingering just out of reach makes the skin on his tingle with anticipation and he suspends you both in the tantalizing feeling of the moment for a few seconds without speaking, just letting the sensations play out.
The agonizing depth of his need pools in the pit of his stomach, making him clench his hand around your spine as it overwhelms his body. “Don’t wanna have ta keep holdin’ back.”
Being pressed against you, you can easily feel him take in a shuddered breath. “Get such a fuckin’ cravin’ for your lips sometimes it feels like I’m goin’ insane,” he whispers the words into your face, his nose gliding against the tip of your own as his mouth ghosts over yours until you tremble in his grasp as his temptation overwhelms you.
Your heartbeat pounds hard against your ribcage and you can hear it in your head. His intensity is enough to make you dizzy, your vision hazy at best as you are consumed with him and only him. No one has ever had this much control over you, but with Simon it is effortless the way he owns all the free space in your mind so that it takes the most minimal effort to have you falling apart, melting in his hands.
In the shadow of the mess hall, hidden in the dark with just you and him, the world seems to completely fall away. Whatever waits outside that moment for you both is forgotten, pushed aside to make room for the need you share for each other.
“Simon,” you moan his name, your eyes fluttering closed as your desperation overtakes you and leaves you begging for him to break the distance still between you.
God, the way his name falls so sweetly from your lips makes him just as feral now as it did the first time he heard you use it. He is insatiable in the way he is willing to do anything just to hear you say it again.
The air outside tonight is cool, but the atmosphere between your bodies is heated from the sticky, warm breath that you both share between your mouths, the proximity of your bodies, the rise in blood pressure that makes your skin hot to the touch. It’s getting harder to breathe and yet the thought of you pulling away from him before he can get his fill of you is torture.
“Swear I’ve never missed someone tha way I miss ya when I have ta stay away,” he says, followed quickly by a groan into your face as you place your palm on his sternum to feel the weighty rise and fall of his broad chest.
Your touch is exhilarating and suddenly his whole body is aroused as if struck by lightning. Unintentionally, his hips move on instinct and begin to grind into yours, the growing bulge in the crotch of his pants making him desperate for more friction and you immediately meet his need with your own. That last shred of his sanity is waning fast the more you both rub yourselves against each other until out of the haze filling his mind and distracting him from his goal he finally finds the last bit of clarity to speak before he completely falls apart.
“Christ, I will never get enough of ya, sweetheart.” And with a brief pause, Simon inhales and leans in hungrily to capture your lips with his.
His mouth dominates your own with urgency, as if at any moment you will be snatched from his hands and he will be left starving for the sensation of your mouth tangling with his.
Your back is slammed into the uneven texture of the brick, jagged bits of clay grating the skin of your back through your t-shirt from the force of your lieutenant aggressively capturing your mouth over and again. Sweet spit and heated lips mingling as he insatiably devours your kiss to leave a wreck of flesh behind on the lower half of your face that only burns for more of his embraces.
Shrouded in the dark your bodies melt together with yours being swallowed by the bulk of his, those bulging muscles along his abdomen pressing into you, pinning you to the wall until you can hardly catch your breath. You hold onto him to keep him from drifting, two tight fists balled up with his shirt as your need overwhelms every sense in an intensity that is shared like an electrical current through your bodies.
Large, coarse hands cup around your face, tilting your head upward to him as his tongue juts out from between his teeth and over his lips to prod against yours until you open your mouth and allow him to shove it in. That thick muscle fills the cavity full as he explores, feeling you, tasting you, memorizing the inside of your mouth. The nicotine on his breath is still pungent from the cigarette that is glowing discarded on the ground at your feet, its sharp notes dancing over the surface of your taste buds as you suck on his tongue.
His knee finds its way between your legs, pressing up into the wall behind you so that the bulk of his thigh is pushed against the mound of your sex, giving you access to something you can ride as your desire intensifies. The stimulation is like a catalyst and without hesitation you begin to roll your hips into it.
Simon is pawing desperately at your clothing to get beneath it and make contact with as much soft, warm skin as his hands can enjoy when a sudden loud clang somewhere close by breaks you both out of the spell of your lust. Two heads return side to side in search for the source of the noise, only to find that nothing is out of place. But the moment is broken and you are both now fully aware of how exposed you are just out in the open.
“Meet at mine after lights out, yeah?” Simon says through heavy panting, holding your face cupped between his hands as he struggles to gain back his composure, at least enough to cross base without drawing attention to himself and the bulge straining against the front of his jeans.
You nod, scrambling to regulate your own quick breathing.
He quickly pulls your face back in for one more feverish kiss before releasing you, pulling down his mask, and briskly heading off into the night. It's still about an hour you have left to wait and though you know that it isn't that long in the grand scheme of things, as you clench your thighs together, you know it won't come soon enough.
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radiance1 · 8 months
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Damian has beef with a homeless kid. Both as a Wayne, and as Robin.
As a Wayne, Damian being alone outside was a rare thing. Most of the time a sibling would be accompanying him or wouldn't be too far off, but he was well and truly alone for the first in a while.
Then he stepped into an alleyway and nearly got hit in the face. It wasn't unexpected, considering this is Gotham, but it's unusual for a thief to be bare-handed.
They then devolved into a fistfight and, while the other boy's form has at least some foundation it was pitiful in comparison to the Demon's Heir and the son of Batman. But the boy had quite a lot of power that he threw around with his punches and kicks, power that Damian used against him while simultaneously dodging his attacks.
There was an invisible line that the boy refused to let him cross that led deeper into the alleyway, and he somehow managed to do exactly that. Looping Damian right back to their starting positions at the start of this fight, Damian at the mouth and the unknown at the middle point.
Damian then caught sight of familiar green scales, a groan, and a very familiar voice calling out "Kid...?" The boy in front of him seemed, genuinely, panicked at the voice's interruption, but not with fear.
But with worry.
So then Damian left, pushing away each and every notion that he should detain Killer Croc right then and there with the logic that he didn't even have his uniform and the proper equipment to effectively deal with someone of Killer Croc's powerset.
Somehow, whenever he was alone from his siblings, he's always met the boy, whom he learned was called Danny via overhearing Killer Croc speaking to him. Their meetings always started in a fight, and ended with no victor as Damian sneaked away as soon as Killer Croc made his presence known.
No wonder he's been so quiet, it seemed he either had a child or found one.
===
As Robin, Damian would admit that he was caught off guard by the same boy who acted as Killer Crocs 'bodyguard' (either for the mutant himself, or everyone else. He doesn't care enough to find out) and would say it was a good move.
But that was as much praise as he was willing to give.
Robin recognized Danny at first glance, if not in looks than surely the fighting style he was familiarized with over the past few months. A mixture between refined and wild.
As always, he threw far more power than his body should allow for someone of his build and age, so perhaps he was a mutant as well. It didn't matter, what did, however, was how each of the punches thrown could punch straight through a wall.
Robin never let himself get hit fully to test if it could as easily pierce the human body as well.
As usual, Robin was either redirecting, outright dodging or blocking (when he wasn't able to dodge just right enough for the attack to not hit him) the attacks that came his way. And, as always, wherever it seemed Killer Croc went, Danny went as well.
Wherever Killer Croc found this boy, Robin would give him credit for being able to choose his protegees correctly.
Robin let no one else deal with Danny whenever he's on scene along with Killer Croc. His father wouldn't even fight him unless it was necessary, most of the time busy with Killer Croc himself, Nightwing was occupied in his own territory, as well as Red Hood.
Robin would not so humbly refuse to even entertain the idea of Red Robin as a candidate.
When Killer Croc escaped, Robin let his opponent chase after his guardian to nurse the wounds that came, more often than not, from counters to his own attacks.
He always had an excuse ready as for the why.
===
Damian Wayne saw something surprising, when he met Danny again.
Robin's own attack being thrown at him.
Of course, it was sloppy and almost painful to look at. But it still surprised Damian, nonetheless.
He spent some time effectively guiding Danny to perform the attack to an at least practical level. Not that Danny asked, or he offered, but it was easy to guide the flow of the fight to what he wanted.
===
Robin was surprised. Not to any great level, but it caught him off guard.
Danny had almost perfectly countered his attack.
It was still sloppy in some places, needed a bit more refining and a great less of the power that was unconsciously behind it. Other than that, it was performed that Damian could say he was almost impressed.
Danny landed a hit on him, and he was quite sure he may have broken a rib, bruised his chest, or both.
So of course, he ruthlessly beat the boy into the ground while pointing out each and every flaw in his technique. Then let him run off after his... master? Father?
He does not know the significance of the role Killer Croc plays to the boy, but he let him run away after him back to the sewer systems.
Of course, an excuse already on lips for his father to hear, and even better, physical evidence to back up his claim.
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fangswbenefits · 9 months
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Patience
Summary: You are too eager to ride Astarion, and he proposes a solution to your impatience. After all, experience is the best teacher and impatience its fiercest enemy.
Pairing: Astarion x female!Tav
Warnings: 18+. Astarion's POV. Inexperienced Tav. Thigh riding. Edging. Sexual frustration. Precum. Handjob. Cum. Muffled moans.
Word count: 2.4k
“Hello.”
Astarion’s eyes lifted from the pages of the dusty book in his hand, carefully following your every move as you dropped the flap of his tent and secured the strings in place.
The universal sign for ‘do not disturb’.
A faint knowing smile tugged at the corner of his lips.
“Hello, darling,” he said, straightening his back as he sat cross-legged on the carpeted floor.
You dropped next to him on both knees, eyeing the book in his hand. “What are you reading?”
His smile grew wider, slightly entertained by your evident lack of self-awareness. 
For all intents and purposes, Astarion could read right through your innocent question.
After all, you were by far his favourite book to indulge in, and – quite frankly – the most alluring.
“Oh, something regarding the political scene of Waterdeep,” he mused, feigning boredom as he snapped the book close. “Gale outdid himself by carrying this tedious literary work around, though it is very much on brand for him.”
You nodded, clasping both your thighs and biting your lip. “Sounds interesting.”
Except you weren’t at all interested in it, were you? Your avidity was rooted in something else entirely.
And he had every intention of indulging you, his resolve fueled by the hardly noticeable way you fidgeted under his stare.
“Dropped by for a goodnight kiss, did you?”
The question startled you, and he inwardly chuckled from anticipation.
“Yes… I suppose so,” you whispered, your eyes dropping to his lips.
To the untrained eye, one might mistake your words for uncertainty.
But Astarion knew you well.
Too well.
Your body language never failed to provide all the information he sought and it told him more about your intentions than words ever could.
Forcing a dramatic sigh, he set the book aside and patted his thigh. “Come here, darling.”
As expected, you eagerly shifted towards him across the carpeted floor before settling on his lap looking positively delighted.
He could already foresee where this was headed.
The moment his hands came to rest on your waist, you immediately looped your arms around his neck as if bracing for the inevitable. 
“Where’s my kiss, then?”
You beamed at his antics and leaned in to press her soft lips against his.
Your inexperience was palpable and clashed head-on with your eagerness, which often resulted in sloppy and clumsy kisses as you came to terms with how to handle your own lust.
Astarion didn’t mind having you take control. After all, experience is the best teacher, and he wouldn’t deny himself the fun of having you struggling with taking the lead.
Outside this tent, you called the shots.
In your shared intimacy, you trusted him to guide you through the intricacies of carnal bliss.
But he was ready to test just how much you had managed to break from your inexperience.
Your warm tongue darted across his lower lip and he immediately allowed you to slide it inside.
Sloppy.
Desperate.
Hungry.
He couldn’t hold back a chuckle as you grazed his fangs, pressing yourself hard against his crotch. The hip rolls followed soon after, and he knew it wouldn’t take long for his cock to stir in his trousers.
A breathy moan rumbled along your throat as his tongue tried to redirect yours. At this rate, you’d nip yourself on one fang. Not that he wouldn’t enjoy the sweet taste of your blood filling his mouth, but it would be far too distracting, and he might not resist having his cock inside you in record time.
The grind against him only increased in pace and pressure, and he felt one of your arms drop and snake in between you two, hand fidgeting at his waistband, tugging eagerly.
Oh, you poor, sweet thing…
You craved touching him more than he had anticipated, and the tingles of pleasure rushed down his body and worked on further teasing his cock.
A needy whimper was what ultimately broke the kiss, and your quickened breaths fanned his lips. “Let me… please…”
“What do you want?” he asked mischievously.
Your other hand slipped from his neck and clumsy fingers kept fumbling with the lacing at the front of his trousers.
Clearly, dexterity wasn’t your forte.
But he had enough for both of you.
“Please…” you repeated, pressing further against him.
Delicious tease…
“Use your words, darling.”
A growl of sheer frustration filled his ears. “Let me ride you… please.”
Crude and straight to the point. 
Delicious.
His cock immediately twitched from the sound of your sweet voice and, for a brief moment, he considered your plea.
But he figured that some reining in was in order.
Your eagerness often resulted in impatience, which often meant he'd come way faster than intended just from your teasing alone.
This time, he wanted to savour the moment.
He quickly grabbed both your wrists before you could free his hardening cock. “Not tonight, sweetheart.”
A string of whines immediately ensued as you buried your face in the crook of his neck. “No… no… no… please…”
You began grinding down against him desperately as frustration took over, and he simply couldn't suppress the deep groan that escaped his throat.
Gods above…
“I know, darling… I know,” he cooed sweetly, rubbing the back of your neck as he prayed to whatever God above to grant him the strength to withstand the delicious roll of your hips. “Be patient.”
Your whines only intensified. “Then… your fingers?” you asked as you pulled back to stare at him, hope kindled in your eyes.
The prospect was tempting. Almost too tempting to pass. He was certain you were already desperately clenching around nothing, your wetness dripping as your body readied itself to have him inside.
However…
He clicked his tongue, letting go of one wrist to graze your bottom lip with his thumb. “What about…” He paused as you parted your lips, inviting him in. “My thigh?”
“Your… thigh?” 
“Yes,” he said, now teasing your upper lip.
Your grind slowed down into a dull pace as if trying to test digest his suggestion.
“But why?”
He grinned sympathetically. “And why not? You are too eager and should exercise more patience.”
You pouted sheepishly and his cock stirred even more. “But… I’ll be quiet…”
This did make him chuckle as he could almost taste your despair. Under different circumstances, he would have adored watching your mouth part as you slid down his cock, but he wondered how long it would take for you to fully soak through his trousers.
“We both know you’d struggle to keep it down,” he said, fingers teasing the hem of your shirt before slipping under it and caressing the warm skin of your lower abdomen. “But the point is: I would very much like to have you grinding along my thigh.”
You swallowed, shivering under his touch and averting your eyes.
All flustered for him.
It always did wonders to his ego and cock.
Letting go of your other wrist, he captured your chin in his hand, wanting your eyes on him once again. “You want to ride me, don’t you? Then feel free to do so, darling.”
Your eyes widened. “Fully clothed?”
He pondered for a moment, one finger slipping under the waistband of your trousers. “Maybe taking these off?”
You didn’t need to be told twice, immediately scrambling with the lacing and nearly losing your balance in the process as you lifted your hips to pull them down your legs and kicked them to the side.
He caught a fleeting glimpse of the swell between your folds, the faint candlelight allowing him to spot your wetness glistening around it.
The pulsing pressure building up around his cock was testing his limits.
Fortunately, Astarion had no issues grounding you with his hands on your hips as you hurried to settle right above one of his thighs as he uncrossed his legs, but not quite lowering yourself all the way down.
“What about yours?”
A mischievous smile danced across his lips. “Take a seat, darling.”
You nodded and gripped his shoulders as you aligned yourself with the bulging muscle along his thigh, pressing down firmly.
A strained hiss parted your lips from the sudden friction and helped your hips find a proper rhythm to begin with.
“You’re so… mean,” you huffed in frustration, eyes locked with his. “Just let me…”
Astarion wasn’t being mean. Not in the common definition of the word, at least.
He would be mean to deny you of this altogether. 
But to deny you would be to deny himself, and he could be quite selfish at times.
Your voice immediately died down as he flexed his muscle, earning a soft mewl from you.
“You were saying…?” he teased.
The way you had to bite down hard on your lip was answer enough, and you merely shook your head as he kept on taunting you.
It wasn’t long before he felt the dampness beginning to seep through the fabric of his trousers. In truth, he wasn’t at all surprised by how soaked you already were. 
So eager…
“Can I just... touch it…” you moaned, dropping your hand to his crotch, teasing his considerable bulge. “Please…”
His hips bucked up into your palm, driven on pure instinct and he let out a blissful groan. “I’ll manage.”
He wouldn’t.
In fact, he was quite sure he was going to come embarrassingly fast in his trousers if you kept riding him like that.
But the alternative was to let you grip his cock, which would not be a wise decision either.
“Don’t be stubborn,” you said with an adorable pout.
Eventually, Astarion settled for the latter, realising he was being consumed by maddening lust and might as well fully indulge in your eagerness.
He quickly unfasted the lacing and hissed in relief as you tugged the fabric down just enough for his throbbing cock to spring free, your hips never faltering. 
The moment your warm fingers wrapped around his cock was when he realised just how wet he also was for you.
A quick glance down allowed him to spot a few droplets of precum rolling down his length before coating your fingers and knuckles.
Another groan left his lips as he struggled to keep his hips steady so as not to ruin the delicious and determined pace you had set grinding against his thigh.
He just wasn’t strong enough to resist you and your evident inexperience as you tried to match your strokes along his cock with your hip rolls.
“Gods…” he growled, eyes nearly fluttering shut.
Deciding that you might need some help, he wrapped his own hand around yours, quickly finding the sweet spot that allowed your hips to move in unison with both your hands.
A loud whimper broke from within you.
“Keep it down…” he managed to say in between needy grunts.
You nodded vaguely as your wetness began to coat the skin under his trousers, further pushing his sanity to the limit.
Oh, he was done for.
He was quite fortunate he wasn’t buried deep inside you or you’d already be filled to brim with his seed.
And against his better judgement, he decided to push himself even more by tugging at the buttons on your shirt.
He needed to see them.
He needed to see your breasts sway as you rode him.
His dexterity would always prove fruitful in the most random situations, and he was skilled enough to undo each button with just two fingers, trailing down your torso, until the thin fabric of your shirt spread apart enough for him to catch sight of one full breast undulate with each roll of your hips.
A perky nipple peeked through and he felt his cock twitch dangerously in your hand.
He pushed the fabric aside so he could have both of them swaying at a mesmerising pace.
You hurriedly slipped out of your shirt, shoving some of it in your mouth to muffle your increasing moans and whimpers.
Astarion felt his balls tighten as a warning.
He wasn’t going to last much longer at this rate.
Not with you so desperately riding him and with your hand stubbornly squeezing more and more precum from him.
Astarion could slip into shadows like one else, bending silence and stealth to his will if he so wished to avoid being spotted.
But there was only so much he could hold back with you so easily ruining him.
“I’m… going…. Astarion…” you groaned, closing your eyes as you threw your head back, nearing your peak and biting down hard into your shirt.
He increased the grip of his fingers around your, yearning to mimic the tightness of being inside you.
“Not so tight…” he pleaded, too lost in his pleasure.
The fabric of his trousers that covered his thigh was absolutely drenched and he couldn’t bring himself to be bothered.
In fact, he was tiptoeing the edge of his self-restraint, now matching his hips with your own.
A sudden spasm from you alerted him that you were coming hard, your fingers squeezing so tightly around his cock he had no other choice but to bite down on one end of your shirt, feeling his fangs tearing easily through the fabric.
You kept on spasming on top of him, your breasts swaying with each contraction that tore through your body,
He managed to fuck your hand a couple of times before he reached the point of no return as his balls tightened, the rush of liquid coursing through his cock as the first spurts of cum spilled from his tip.
For a moment, his mind blanked as his own powerful contractions took over his entire body and senses.
He felt his cum seep through his own shirt as he used your trembling hand to squeeze the final drops from his cock, not bothered where they landed as long as they were out and by your hand.
You slumped into him, whimpering softly from the aftermath of reaching your peak.
It took him a few seconds to catch up with you and he quickly released your torn  shirt from his mouth.
“You owe me a new one,” you said, panting against his neck and still not letting go of his cock.
He blinked a few times as he descended from the overwhelming bliss you had thrust him into.
“Darling, you owe me.”
You chuckled faintly. “And why is that?”
He caressed the back of your hand, absentmindedly coating it in cum with his fingers. “You’ve just learned to have some patience.” 
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mnsgranth · 2 years
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How To Redirect To Multiple Websites With Using JavaScript?
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writingsbychlo · 9 months
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KNOW YOU LIKE I DO | tom riddle
summary; love letters are tom's way of communicating. unfortunately, he's not as good with his actions.
word count; 7036
notes; another one that I said was gonna be short and it wasn’t. I think I’m physically incapable of writing short fics, actually.
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Dear Tom,
Tommy. 
My Tom. 
Do you still have that first letter I wrote to you, back in summer? No, I suppose you don’t, that’s not very like you. 
I’m drunk. Just a little bit (a lot), and I can’t take it anymore. Mattheo told me to tell you how I feel, and that is exactly what I’m going to do. He’s asleep on my bed right now, drooling into my favourite pillow waiting for me to write this. 
So here it is. 
I’m angry. I’m hurt. I’m confused. I’m in love. And it’s all your fault.
Staring across the crowded room, your eyes fixed back onto that of Tom Riddle. It wasn’t hard to spot him, not as he was the only man who came to a Christmas party dressed in all black and sat alone, brooding. His lips were pressed into a line, the lights bouncing off of those shiny curls, green and red splashed across his pale skin as he sipped at his drink, listening to the conversation Draco and Blaise were having, but never participating. 
Your heart lurched a little in your chest, just the mere sight of him had a thousand different feelings rearing their heads, and you sighed to yourself. Shaking your head, your attention was redirected to the drinks table, pouring yourself an extra strong helping of Giggle Gin and topping it off. The urge to look back over was strong, and you steadfastly ignored it, suppressing the urge and instead, turning your back to his direction, walking towards the group of girls giggling in the opposite corner. 
Taking your seat back in the comfy corner of the sofa, Pansy offered you a smile, her arm looped over Luna’s shoulders as the blonde cuddled into her side. Astoria was currently recounting the intimate details of her latest night with Draco, and you hid a smile in your cup as you tuned back into the conversation. 
You lost the battle with your will, however, gaze moving directly back across the room to Tom. He had a slight smirk on his face now as he watched Draco speak, and you did not doubt that he was receiving a tale of the exact same encounter Astoria was currently telling, only from a different point of view. 
Blonde cut across your vision, the perfect smile of Daphne blocking your view as she sat in front of you, severing any sights of Tom you might have had. “You know,” She started, grinning as she took a sip of your drink cheekily, before handing it back. “If you stare at him any harder, you’re gonna’ drill holes in the side of his head.”
You could only scoff, but no argument formed. Lately, all you’d been able to do was stare longingly at him across any room. You weren’t subtle, and you’d never been much good at hiding your feelings. Which seemed fitting, since you’d fallen for someone who was like a blank slate, permanently. 
Tom Riddle was a harder book to read than a tablet written in a never-before-discovered language. 
“He looks so… miserable, Daph.”
She glances over her shoulder at him, snorting a laugh, and turning her attention back to you. “Because Tom Riddle doesn’t go to parties, and he’s probably counting the minutes until he can leave.” She smirked a little, shuffling closer, perched on the edge of her seat as she leaned in, “At least, he didn’t go to parties. Until you, that is.”
Your cheeks flushed, a subtle hint at the running joke your friendship group had taken on. They’d all become convinced that Tom attended parties for you, ever since he’d been a willing guest for the first time at Draco’s end-of-summer bonfire bash, and spent the majority of the night talking with you. They refused to let it go. 
“You should go over there and cheer him up. I bet he’d be smiling in no time if you gave him a little attention.”
That was exactly the problem. You’d been giving him a little too much attention, and now, everyone was painfully aware of your feelings for him. Except for him, maybe. Either that, or he was just very good at pretending he didn’t notice, in a chance to let you down gently. You didn’t know which option was worse. “Don’t be ridiculous, Daph.”
“No, you don’t be ridiculous! You and him are… something else.” She took your free hand in hers, squeezing tightly. All amusement melted from her face, and she gave you a serious look. The expression she wore when advising her sister on Draco, or comforting Pansy after a panic attack. “Are you ever going to tell me what happened over the summer, or are you just going to keep acting like it wasn’t some cataclysmic shift?”
“So dramatic.” You hummed to your roommate.
“Still pretending, I see.” She teases lightly, but her brows are still furrowed. She waited a few more seconds, to see if you’ll crack. All you do is hold her steady gaze, and take a sip of your drink. With a sigh, she released your hand, and leans back in her chair. “Well, whatever. We can all see it, see how you two pine for one another, and how perfect you’d be together. Just go and talk to him! He’s probably sat over there waiting for you anyway. He had that exact same kicked-puppy expression on at the summer party, until you walked in.”
“He did not…” You murmur, the very thought making you blush. 
“I think that’s the first time I ever saw Tom Riddle smile. A real smile, not the smile he gets when threatening someone, or when Mattheo falls over. A good smile.” 
“Now you’re just making him out like some kind of sulky villain.” You retort, and she only raises a brow at you.
“Here, take him this box, and go talk to him. The poor boy looks lost over there without you.” Reaching under her chair, Daphne produces a familiar box, wrapped neatly in black paper with dark green ribbon, and your jaw drops. 
“Daphne!—” Reaching out to snatch it from her, your brows furrow. “Did you go through my things?”
“I didn’t exactly go through your things,” She grins, watching you turn over the label with his name written on neatly. “I just watched you hide it under your bed and got curious… it smells good. Is it cookies? Can I have one?”
When she reaches for the box, you slap the back of her hand, and she sticks her tongue out at you in return. “No! You cannot, you little snoop!”
“Fine! If you won’t let me have a cookie, then you have to go over there. You either give me a cookie, or you give me the satisfaction of seeing you and him smile.” Her arms crossed, her tone annoyed but her words caring, and love shone in her gaze as she stared at you. “Go on. Go over to him. Please.”
It wasn’t like you didn’t already want to, and with her encouragement, you were a weak woman to say no. Downing the rest of your drink for a little liquid courage, you hop to your feet, present clutched in your hands.
Weaving through the room, the bass notes of Mattheo’s custom-made playlist pumped through the room from the speakers, a playlist you might have slightly altered a few days ago to add a couple of songs, just to mix up his usual tastes. Your stomach was twisting nervously, but the alcohol in your veins made for a pleasant buzz as the distance between you both closed. 
After almost taking a ping-pong ball to the eye, courtesy of Theo on the beer-pong table, you cleared the games and settled into the pleasant atmosphere surrounding where the boys had set themselves up for the evening by the fire. When you approached, Tom looked up, frown melting away as the crease between his brows disappeared, and he sat up a little straighter as you approached. 
“Hi, doll,” He murmured, shifting his arm from the armrest of the chair, so that you could take a seat on it instead. That same arm soon wrapped around your waist, his head falling to rest on your shoulder, and your heart skipped a beat within your chest. “Where’ve you been?”
“Over there, with Daph and the girls.” You whisper in reply, balancing the box on your thighs, and pointing through the crowds to the barely visible patch of chairs and sofas you’d all been occupying. He only hummed, squeezing you a little closer. 
“Stay here with me for a while?”
“Sure,” Your voice hardly worked as you spoke, emotions clogging up, and you reached for the gift in your lap. “I have this for you, anyway. I made you those cookies you like so much.”
“You did?” His head lifted, and one of those pretty smiles that made your heart stop clean in your chest was adorning his lips. “The ones with the orange peel and the dark chocolate?”
“Those very ones.” You handed it to him, and he tugged at the ribbon covering the box, fingers flipping under the seals of the paper until it fell openly neatly. Flicking open the catch on the cardboard box, the smell of freshly baked treats filled the air, and he made a rumbling noise of happiness as he plucked on up, and took a bite. As you laughed at him, he took another, pushing it between your lips with a smirk while he chewed. 
He resealed the box, savouring them, as he did all things, and putting them on the table in front of himself. You held the cookie now, eating it slowly, as Draco and Blaise finally seemed to become aware of your presence. 
“I have a question.” Draco started, and your gaze moved to him, brow raising as you took the final bite. “Is Astoria over there talking about me?”
The blond smirked, and you twisted, lifting your legs to sit over Tom, ankles crossing on the opposite arm. “No, no. She’s been recounting a scene from a book.”
“What?”
“Yeah. You know, the fun books. It was really, really hot.” You teased, fanning yourself, and Tom chuckled, reaching over you for his drink, and taking a sip. Instead of putting it back down, he rested the cool glass on your thigh, his free hand coming to sit on your calf, rubbing lightly as you shivered at the touch. “Why? You think you’re better than a good spicy romance?”
“I know I am!” Draco huffed, and Blaise rolled his eyes, watching you wind his best friend up with barely a few words at all. “What book is this?”
“Oh, you don’t want to know…”
“I do want to know! Tell me!” His cheeks were turning pink, all the way up to the tips of his ears. In the spirit of Christmas, you took pity on him, rolling your eyes. 
“I think it was called… Astoria’s Diary.” 
It took a few seconds for it to register in Draco’s mind, and the furious pink turned to an embarrassed red, and he shook his head, eyes narrowed at you. “I despise you.”
“You love me.” You fired back, and he scoffed, but the edges of his lips pulled at a smile, and he looked away to cover it. Settling back a little more, you leaned into the cushion, feeling Tom roll his head across the cushion to lean in your direction. 
“I feel like I’ve barely seen you all week.” He says, voice low for only you to hear, and your head twists towards him You were close, close enough to pick out the different coloured flecks of colour in his eyes as he looked at you, and the hardly visible steaks of lighter brown that trailed naturally through his dark curls.
“Well, I’ve had detention all week, thanks to a certain someone.” You poked his chest, and he only smirked a little bit, shuffling his head a fraction closer. 
“I needed you, what can I say?”
“You needed someone to keep a lookout while you snuck into the restricted section again. Why did it have to be me?” You scoffed, working to keep the smile on your face as the answer to your own question flickered through your mind. He chose you because he knew you’d drop everything and come, the voice taunted; you buried it under the song playing and the laughter in the room so you didn’t have to think about it...
“Don’t act like you didn’t have fun when we ran.” He chuckled, hand sliding up your leg again, fingers lacing with your own. The same way they had when you’d been caught, and he’d grabbed your hand, the two of you ducking and weaving between stacks, fleeing through the corridors. Laughing and out of breath, he’d clutched your hand, thumb rubbing over your knuckles just like he was doing now, staring at you with those pretty eyes.
You hadn't been caught, but you had gotten detention for skipping class to go with him, and so you’d spent all five nights of your final week in detention, writing lines. You lifted your free hand, sighing with a nod, and running it through his curls. His eyes fluttered, head tipping back to follow your hand, and a content smile took over his lips. 
You loved to see him like this, to see him so carefree and happy, to see him relax at just your touch. You’d never seen him like this before. The thought that only you could do it to him sent a thrill down your spine, made your thoughts feel hazy and slow, like treacle in your mind, and your nerves tingled. So, why had he never made a move to make it anything more? You’d given him a dozen chances, a dozen more opportunities…
“I don’t know what I’m going to do without you this holiday.” He broke your train of thought, eyes opening again to peer up at you, and his lips became a frown as he thought about it. “My father is going to pile on the pressure not that I’m in my graduating year. I can already feel the headache forming right between my eyes.”
“Oh..” You coo, hand slipping down from his hair to rub your thumb over his forehead, the space you know him to get stress headaches the worst, when he works too hard or gets wound up. He just chuckled, eyes sliding shut once again. 
The song changed, and his body tensed underneath you for just a second, before his eyes snapped open, gaze locked on you. “This is my favourite song.”
“Is it?” You mumble, finger still tracing lightly over his skin, and he nods.
“I didn’t think Mattheo put it on the playlist. I asked him, and he very emphatically said no.” 
“Maybe he changed his mind.” Your shrug doesn’t convince him, not as you both hear Mattheo question the song with a stream of curses somewhere in the distance. His lips twitched at the edges, a small smile, but he said nothing else. Instead, he leaned in, your arm going around his shoulders, rubbing softly as his head nestled onto your shoulder, a sigh on his lips. 
It was perfect, just like this. If he could just open his eyes and see, he’d know how wonderful it could be. Nobody knew him like you did, he’d made sure to keep his secrets locked up tight. But over the months of exchanging letters, and candle-lit nights in the library, he’d bore so much of his soul to you. 
Deep, wounded parts, that you’d tried to put back together. 
Soft, tender parts that he protected so valiantly, but trusted you with. 
Sweet, loving parts, that never saw the light of day, unless you were together.
It was impossible, surely, that he didn’t know. He might keep his feelings locked up tight, but you didn’t hide yours very well at all. As you sat here now, fingers weaving through his hair, lips tracing his temple as you whispered nonsense to him about your day, his head on your shoulder, that he didn’t know. Even a man like Tom Riddle couldn't miss it, right?
You just wanted to make him happy, but he didn’t feel the same. 
With a heart-aching sigh, you ran your fingers through his curls one more time. Unrequited love wasn’t going to ruin your night. Unrequited love wasn’t going to ruin your Christmas. You would not be one of those girls who gave in to their feelings, and crumbled at the feet of a man who didn’t return her affections. 
Sitting up some more, he grumbled at the disruption, blinking his eyes back open as he lifted his head again. “I’m… I’m going to go dance, and play some games, okay?”
“Alright,” He smiled, patting your thigh and lifting his drink away. “Have fun. I’ll probably leave soon. If I don’t see you again, just know I’ll be thinking of you over these holidays. We’ll write again.”
His words send a rush of heat to your cheeks, a tumble of nerves through your stomach, and you could only nod. One more chance, one more chance to make a move…
“Merry Christmas, Tommy,” you whisper, leaning in to kiss his cheek. A kiss that was purposefully close to the edge of his mouth, a kiss that purposefully lingered just a second too long as you pulled away slowly, giving him a chance to turn his head, to close the gap, to kiss you—
But he didn’t, he only smiled. “Merry Christmas, doll.”
So, you stand. You brush it off. You brush off the moment, and the feelings, and all the disappointment and heartbreak that came with it. 
But I can’t do it anymore. 
We’ve been housemates for seven years, we’ve been friends for half of those, and I’ve been in love with you for months. 
But you don’t love me. Mattheo says you do, says you’re just stupid when it comes to feelings. But, even you couldn't miss how I feel about you.
So, I’m letting you go. 
New Year, New Me, New Heart.
“No, your dorm is that way.” You giggle, Mattheo’s arm over your shoulder, pushing him in the direction of the boy’s dorms and pointing. “My dorm is this way!”
“No, you’re wrong!” He mutters, shaking his head dramatically. “Boys to the left,” He says, pointing right, “Girls to the right, because girls are always right!”
“Well, I won’t argue with you there.” You grin, spinning him around. “Wait, now I’m confused. Who’s dorm were we going to again?”
A few too many shots, a few more drinks than your limit at the beer-pong table, and as the last of the party was dying down, you and Mattheo were attempting to stumble back to your dorms. “Theo’s.”
“Right. But why are we going to Theo’s dorm?”
“Because he’s my friend,” Mattheo said. “And also, his bed is next to mine.” Another fit of laughter, drunken giggles melting away, and the two of you collapsed down against the wall, heads tipped back to the stone as amusement took over. When you finally caught your breaths once again, he was smiling, eyes sparkling in that unique Matty-way. Kicking his legs out before himself, he sighed. “Maybe I will just sleep here.”
“You can’t sleep here.”
“Why?” He pouted, and you searched through your foggy mind for a reason. 
“Because you have to sleep in a bed.” Is what you settled on, shrugging your shoulders, even if you were getting a little bit too comfy against the stone too. 
“Can I sleep in your bed?” He wiggled his brows, smirking, before burping, and you giggled again. 
“No, you may not.”
“Why?” He whined, kicking one leg like a toddler in a tantrum. “You have fluffy pillows.”
“And you have sheets that haven’t been washed in months.” Your nose screwed up, and he let out a dramatic, wounded sound, like a soldier who had just been shot in a war movie. 
“That was cold.” He muttered, shaking his head. “Not as cold as the frozen Earth Tom would bury my wee little body in if I spent the night at your dorm.”
You didn’t respond, the mention of his name was like a bucket of ice over your head. Not exactly sobering, but shocking. 
“I’m saying he would murder me.”
“Yes, I understood.”
“You didn’t laugh.” He pouted, and you chuckled for his benefit. “No, it’s not real. Now I feel like I begged for it.”
“You did.”
“You suck.”
“You swallow.” You sighed, and he groaned once again, another argument lost. His head rolled to your shoulder, his body slumping into relaxation. 
“So… what is the deal with you and my brother?” His lips twisted as he thought about it, but he looked up at you curiously, frown only deepening at the sad look on your face. 
“There is no deal.” You shrug, “He doesn’t want me like that. We’re just friends.”
“Yeah,” He snorts, “And the sky isn’t blue.”
“I’m serious, Matty. I’ve given him a hundred chances. He could’ve made a move anytime. I haven’t exactly kept my feelings to myself, all you fools can see my heart dripping and bleeding on my sleeve. He knows, he just didn’t want to acknowledge it.” Your lungs burned for air at the end of your speech, and you took a deep breath, staring ahead at the chipping bricks in an attempt to avoid tears. “Why doesn’t he want me, Matty?”
“He does,” Mattheo mumbled, taking your hand in his and squeezing. “He’s just a fucking moron. But, he’s also scared. You know, you’re pretty much all he talks about? And, I never saw him smile so much as he did during the summer, when he’d receive your letters. He’d get all anxious and fidgety every day, waiting for the mail owl to arrive. He’s never going to make the first move. He’d rather suffer for all his life but have you like this, than risk losing you entirely.”
The words felt like a warming blanket and an ice-cold lake. Comforting and terrifying, sweet and burning, all at the same time. 
Mattheo huffed a laugh, “Maybe you should write him a love letter.”
“Maybe I should…” You whisper, drunken thoughts taking over, and his head snapped up. 
“I was joking.”
“I’m not. That’s a good idea. I should write him a letter, and tell him that I’m moving on.” You brushed your legs off as you stood, taking his hands and pulling him to his feet, determined.
“Okay, that’s not what a love letter is. That’s so far from what I said—”
“Let’s go!” You grabbed his wrist, tugging him along behind you as you made your way through the halls. 
“Now? Why are we doing it now? We should be sleeping now!” His protests fell on deaf ears as you dragged him along. Throwing open the door to your room, Daphne was already asleep, still in her party dress, face down on her pillow, out cold from the night’s festivities and snoring.
Mattheo collapsed onto your bed, rolling onto his side and clutching a fluffy cushion to his chest as he curled into a ball. 
“I’ll just wait here, then.” He yawned through his words, but you were too busy to care, scrambling for a pot of ink and some new parchment. Taking a seat at your desk, you stared at the paper, quill hovering, ready to write.
So, I will spend the end of this year away from you. You say we’ll write, but I don’t want to. 
Only write to me, Tom, if you feel the same.  If not, don’t. Let me heal, and when we come back in the New Year, I promise, nothing will change except for my heart. 
We will still be friends, best friends, and we’ll never talk about it again.
I will wait for you.
Finishing the letter, you sighed at it, the ink drying and immortalising your words onto the page. Sitting before you was the sum total of what sat in your heart, and your mind. Laid out and ready to go, your hands trembled a little as you read it over, and over, to be sure. 
But you had to do this, you had to give this letter to him, to alleviate the strain on your heart, to finally have some closure. Whether he felt the same or not, you’d have relief. Folding it carefully, you searched a strip of wax seal lighting the end and waiting for it to get hot, drips of Slytherin green filling into a pool that overlapped the edge of your paper. When there was enough, you stamped it carefully, sealing it shut as the wax cooled. 
Taking a look behind you, you caught sight of a sleeping Mattheo, his jaw hanging open, drooling onto your favourite throw pillow, half tucked under your blankets from where he’s only bothered to cover his legs. Peeling away the wax seal, you walked over to him, shaking his shoulder, until he awoke with a huff and a groan, whining as he sat up. 
“I was dreaming.”
“I wrote the letter.” You show him the proof, and he rubs his eyes with the heels of his hands, glancing from it, to you, and back. “You have to give it to him.”
“Now?”
“No! Not now. Tomorrow. After we get off the train.” He blinked a little more, waking up from his power nap and taking the paper from you. Flipping it over in his hands, he inspected Tom’s name across the front, no address, and raised his brows. 
“Why don’t you mail it?”
“That’ll take days, and I don’t want to leave it up to chance. I need you to give it to him, tomorrow. I know you’ll be swamped with everything your father expects of you both this time of year, events and frivolities and all, but you have to. I don’t want it getting lost amongst other letters and Christmas cards, and such.” Your hands clasped together before you, blinking at him pleadingly, and hoping your puppy-dog eyes were half as good as his.
He sighed, rolling his eyes and muttering to himself as he stood.
“Please, Matty.”
“Fine. I’ll give it to him.” He caved, and you threw your arms around him, hugging him tightly. 
“Tomorrow? After you get off the train?”
“Yes. I will give Tom the letter… tomorrow.”
Yours,
If you want me, 
(y/n) x
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Tom double-checked his bags, sighing as he zipped up the piece of luggage he’d actually have access to on the train, everything he needed to survive a six-hour train journey. A knock sounded from the door, a signature one that only Mattheo ever used, excessively long and irritating, and the door swung open a second later to reveal his brother. 
Placing his carry-on down on the bed beside his own, Mattheo slumped out on his freshly-stripped bed. “You took your bags to the carriage already?”
“I got up early.”
“Surprising, I thought I’d have to drag you out of your bed this morning considering how much you drank last night.” He gave his brother a look, a single brow raised, and Mattheo just huffed. 
“It’s called having fun, you should try it sometime.”
Tom only rolled his eyes, gaze scanning across the bag Mattheo had abandoned, snagging on the letter sticking out of one pocket. T— was all that was visible. It might have been a card, that someone had addressed it to ‘Theo’ instead of Mattheo, but everyone called him ‘Matt’ if they wanted a nickname, to avoid confusion with Nott.
Curiosity ate at him, and nudging the bag subtly revealed just enough more to show an ‘O’. 
Definitely Tom, then. Mattheo was carrying a letter for him, and had not delivered it. Before he could pluck it from the pocket, his brother was sitting up, reaching for his bag and getting to his feet, swinging the letter out of his reach inadvertently. 
“Ready to go?”
“Is that letter for me?” Tom burst instead, making another move for the bag. His suspicions were only confirmed when Mattheo shifted his body, pulling the arm carrying the bag away from him, behind his body and out of Tom’s reach. “Why do you have it? When did it arrive?”
Mattheo turned casually, looking down at it, patting it and pushing it back into the bag, deeper. Tom recognised that handwriting now, though, and the urgency swelled. “Uh… last night, I think. But I was a little drunk, so…”
“Why didn’t you give it to me?” Tom pressed, biting his tongue from yelling at his brother, and Mattheo just shrugged. 
“Figured I’d give it to you on the train, or something. Or when we got home. It’s just a letter.”
“Yeah…” Tom could only hum in response, his mind spinning a little. Everyone had exchanged gifts and goodbyes last night, before the party. For exactly this reason, to avoid the morning rush to the train, to avoid the hassle in the morning. “But— I saw her last night. Why wouldn't she just give it to me then? Or mail it to me?” 
The questions were ceaseless, almost making Tom dizzy as he tried to think them through, and Mattheo could only shrug, biting the inside of his cheek to keep his smile to himself. 
“I don’t know, Tom. She just came to me, and asked me to give you that letter because she didn’t want it to get lost amongst other letters, or take too long, or something like that.” It was a small lie, really, fabricated from aspects of the truth.
“So, it’s important, then! It’s obviously important if she couldn't risk it getting lost, if it had to be hand-delivered! I should read it.” Just like that, Tom stepped right into Mattheo’s trap. Now all he had to do was pull the pin, and let the steel jaws snap shut. Yes, it could potentially backfire hugely, but Mattheo was looking on the positive side for this. 
“We have to go, Tom. Everyone else has probably already left for the train.” Mattheo swung his bag again, making his point, and kicked Tom’s suitcase from where it sat beside the door towards him to pick up. “Let’s go.”
Tom sighed, grabbing his bags and taking a few steps after him, and didn’t even make it over the threshold of the door before he gave in. His bags dropped from his hands, and planted on his hips instead. “I’m going to read it.”
“Tom—”
“Give me the letter.” He held out his pal, and Mattheo tipped his head to the side, but pressed his lips together to hide a grin. “I’ll catch up, you go. I’ll read it and I’ll catch up, it’s only a letter, can’t take that long.”
He lunged for Mattheo's bag, snatching the crisply pressed paper from the pocket before his brother could stop him. As he turned away, he missed Mattheo’s victorious smile. “Alright, I’ll take your trunk down. Don’t be long, or you’ll miss the train.” And you’ll miss her, were Mattheo’s unspoken words, as he grabbed Tom’s suitcase and disappeared, leaving him alone. 
Sitting on the edge of his bed, Tom’s hand shook a little. The paper felt like it weighed a thousand tons. There was so much unspoken mystery behind it that Tom was sure whatever this letter said, it was not their usual correspondence. Not the chatty, friendly, borderline flirty letters they’d send each other when apart, this was more. 
Sliding his thumb neatly under the wax seal he was so familiar with, Tom popped open the letter, unfolding it carefully and flipping it around to read. 
His gaze scanned over the paper, lips flicking up at the use of the nickname he only allowed you to use, the swirl of your handwriting that he loved so much. The smile didn’t last long, however, and neither did the breath in his lungs as his chest seized. He read it.
Over and over again, he read the letter. 
The minutes melted past as he absorbed what it said, until he could read the letter word for word without looking at it, tattooed into his mind now like a brand. With trembling fingers, he folded the letter back up carefully, lifting the paper to his lips as his eyes slid shut. 
His heart was pounding, more so than he’d ever felt. Tom was not one for rash decisions and sudden jumps, everything was calculated and thought through and planned. But this, this was you. This is just what you did, forced him to let go of routine and be spontaneous, forced him to be carefree, to loosen the grip he had on the reigns, to show him he wouldn't fall apart at the slightest breeze. 
He smiled against the letter, thoughts of you flicking through his mind. 
And then a clock chimed, and he jumped violently within as he was rushed back to reality in a split second. The clock in the common room chimed loudly, echoing through the empty dorms and halls. 
Rushing to his feet, Tom opened his bag, tucking the letter safely inside one of his books to preserve it, to tuck it inside the box of letters from you that was tucked under his bed at home. You doubted him, his feelings, unsure he’d kept that first letter, when in reality, he’d kept every single one.
Every letter, every note, even the silly little joke you scribbled on torn-off pieces of paper and threw at him in class, he kept them all.
Zipping his bag back up and grabbing it, he had no time to spare, racing to the chimes of the clock through the castle, to the front gates where the final carriage was leaving. 
It felt too long. Too long as the horses plodded through the snow, too long as the wheel scrolled slowly, and his foot tapped agitatedly on the floor in a way he never allowed himself to do. His thumbnail was between his teeth, flicking between the frost-covered ground and his bag, wondering if it would actually be faster to run there himself. 
Ahead, the train sounded its horn. The final warning for all students to begin boarding and settling in, because they’d be departing soon. 
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You watched as the trunks were beginning loaded onto the train, all to be collected when you arrived in London, only letting out a breath of relief as Mattheo rounded the corner, finally joining your group. 
“Matty! About time, we were worried you’d miss the train.” Your arms wrapped around his shoulders as he sighed, a little out of breath, and hugged you back once he dropped the two bags in his hands. Nobody followed him, and your brows furrowed, pulling back, “Where’s Tom?”
“He’s probably already on the train, sulking somewhere. He’s never late.” Theo snickered, and you rolled your eyes, smacking him across the shoulder for his joke. 
“Blaise is inside holding a cabin for us, is Tom not sitting with us?” Enzo questioned, and you turned to Mattheo, waiting for answers. 
“He’ll be here, trust me.”
“He’s late?” Draco asked, quickly followed by Enzo and Theo, all discussing it. Regulus stayed quiet, smoking and trying to hide it from being seen, but his expression was just as concerned as everyone else’s. 
The chatter continued on, by your worry didn’t cease, checking up and down the platform as people bustled and crowded it. Saying their final goodbyes and giving out hugs, climbing on and off the train as they all wished one another Merry Christmas, and being unable to see either end was causing your anxiety to rocket higher. 
The train horn blared again, and students began to board. “Mattheo, seriously, where is he—” Just like that, you saw him, the busy platform parting to let him through, the look on his face as terrifying as ever, and people moved out of his way as he made his way towards your group. 
“Told you he’d be here,” Mattheo smirked, and you raised a brow. 
“The hell did you say to him this morning, Matt?” Regulus questions. 
“He looks mad,” Draco murmured. 
“He looks like he’s plotting.” Enzo corrected.
Every step closer rose the tension as Tom finally looked up, his sights setting on you, and his jaw clenched. Brows drawn in, he did look like he was plotting, like a thousand thoughts were racing through his mind that he couldn't sort through. 
“Hey, man. We thought you were gonna’ miss the—” Draco’s words cut off at your squeak, as Tom stepped closer, never stopping the movements of his body until he was cupping your cheeks, his mouth descending upon your own. 
You were almost knocked backwards from the force of it, your hands gripping at his shoulders as he bent you over backwards, a kiss so intense your knees almost went weak. 
It was desperate, you could barely keep up, kissing back as best you could through your shock, until it wore off enough to reciprocate. Wrapping one arm around his neck, your other slipped to his face, his own hands making their way down, to band around your waist and pull you in closer, until your bodies were flush. 
His tongue licked into your mouth, a sigh escaping you as he did, and your heart pounded against your heart, the same way he was doing, felt through his jumper and layers. The boys were whistling, cheering and hooting, and if you weren’t so happy you’d have been embarrassed by the show they were making, and the attention they were no doubt drawing. 
When he finally pulled back, you panted softly, his forehead resting on your own, blinking his eyes open to meet your gaze. 
“Can I write to you regardless?” He mumbled, voice rough and tense with emotion, and your brows furrowed. 
“Wh— What?” 
He leaned in, not helping you clear your dazed mind at all as he kissed you again, and again, until you were smiling, fingers clenched so tight in his coat that your knuckles were white, just to stay upright. 
You pecked his lips once more, chasing him as he pulled back, and the train horn sounded, a final warning, but you didn’t care. “You know how I feel now. You don’t have to wait for my reply. You can be assured that I will miss you dearly over these two weeks, and I am already counting the minutes until I see you again. But can I write to you, still?”
As the realisation set in, your face flamed, jaw dropping a little bit, and he wasted no opportunity, kissing you softly. “You read my letter.”
He only nodded, a gentle chuckle onto your mouth as your lips brushed. “You’d leave it to Mattheo to deliver? He’d probably lose it at a McDonalds, trying to get a Big Mac before my father saw him, on the way home. 
Your laughter was sweet, a puffed-out sound as his hands smoothed up and down your back. “I’d love to get more letters from you, Tommy. I’m sorry I didn’t give it to you in person, but I was scared. I thought I’d made my feelings for you obvious, and you didn’t reciprocate, so I had to write that letter. To get it out, to finalise it all.”
“I like to consider myself a smart man, you know. When it comes to you, clearly, I’m a fool. You leave me speechless, and without proper thoughts, every time. All I can think about is how pretty you are, and how much I like you, despite my best efforts not to.” 
The declaration was so utterly Tom, to hate being in love even if he loved it. 
“For Salazar’s sake, what have you done, Matt?” Theo cussed, and you twisted your head to look at him. “Shakespeare over here is going to be writing sonnets for the rest of the year. None of us will stand a chance with any other girls when he’s showing us up, standing under windows, yelling his love to the moon.”
You rolled your eyes, ignoring their nonsense. Tom did the same, nuzzling his nose against your cheek, and leaving a kiss there.
“I’ll look forward to your letters, just as I did in the summer.” You whisper, pulling away from him as the platform clears, most students already aboard now.
“And after?” Tom questions, “May I still write you letters if I, too, find myself struggling to confess my feelings in person?”
“Oh, God,” Enzo muttered. “He’s going to be writing love letters all year. He’s making the rest of us sound like cavemen. Me, you, bed, now.” He grunted, smacking a fist in his chest. You giggled as Tom rolled his eyes. 
“We should get on the train.” You whisper, taking pity on the others and untangling yourself from his arms. 
Tom took his bag again, and your own. With a final kiss on your cheek, he walked away to the door of the carriage, letting the rest of you follow behind. Mattheo fell into step beside you, smirking as he bumped your hips with his own.
“So, should I tell my mother and father that they have a new daughter-in-law this holiday, or wait ‘til the next.”
His teasing made you blush again, cheeks already red in the cold, warming you under all those layers. “You’re a filthy traitor. You gave him my letter early.”
“I said I’d give it to him ‘tomorrow’. Never agreed to the after the train part.” He tutted, proud of himself. “Always pay attention to the words of a contract. My dear brother taught me that. You never have to break a promise, if you’re smart with your words.”
That sounded exactly like something your man would say, your eyes rolling to the Heavens. 
Mattheo leaned in, voice dropping to a whisper as the pair of you climbed the steps. “You never have to break your heart either, if you’re smart about who you give it to.”
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44be1ow · 2 years
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EMILIE AUTMN ?????? IM VERY FOND OF HER. MY SISTER USED TO LISTEN TO HER ON THE DAILY BASIS WHEN I WAS IN MIDDLE SCHOOL. FUCK YEA
ANON YOU HAVE NO IDEA. I WAS INSUFFERABLE. THE DRAMA SURROUNDING HER AUDIOBOOK WAS MY HYPERFIXATION AT ONE POINT. I USED TO PRACTICE SCREAMING LIKE HER WHEN I WAS HOME ALONE
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stilljuststardust · 3 months
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Break the pattern, end the cycle
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I know a lot of you are stuck in a loop, trying, doubting, giving into the 3D. You're probably finding yourself asking why it's so hard, why are you doing this over and over?
We are creatures of habit, this includes our thought patterns. You think thousands of thoughts a day, most of them are thoughts you have thought before.
This is why it feels so natural to go back to the old story, you've been telling it over and over ritualistically.
But how do I create new thought patterns?
Disrupt the pattern
Be aware of when you are engaging in the old story and put a stop to it. Redirect, vaunt, affirm, visualize, whatever you need to do.
Repetition
A pattern is something that's repeated over and over, if you want to create a new pattern you should repeat repeat repeat your new belief
Discipline
Be consistent. Consistency ≠ perfection, consistency is deciding to persist even when you encounter an obstacle.
New thoughts
How am I supposed to establish new thoughts if it's not even in my 3D? Affirmations.
An affirmation is just a thought or a sentence you say to affirm to your subconscious that you already have your desire.
It's OK if it doesn't feel natural to you, what new habit feels natural in the beginning? After repetition it will become your default state/thought pattern.
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harleehazbinfics · 6 months
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Can We? an au lucifer x reader oneshot
Author Profile a/n: SURPRISEEEEEE. i got 'we become we' -journey to jerusalem song on a loop since i found it and i knew i wasn't gonna get it out of my system unless i do something about it. so pls enjoy my ramblings lmfao word count: 1200+
"Your Majesty, please reconsider this! Our kingdom needs a Queen!"
Lucifer sighs at the aide's words, feeling irritated with the insistent suggestion of a Queen.
"I agree, your majesty. The people are quite worried for you. You need an heir, and you aren't getting any younger either," another aide jumps in.
Lucifer surrenders to them with hands in the air in exasperation and finally replies, "Fine."
The people in the room sigh in relief that they somehow got through to him. But hitch their breath when he adds on.
"However, I won't just choose anyone. Only the best candidate will stand by my side and be rightfully called the Queen," he glares.
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"Good day, your majesty. My name is (full name), Princess of the Eastern Kingdom. I'm grateful for this opportunity," you smile amiably.
"Likewise," he responds quite honestly shocked from your tone.
You were the guest that was expected to arrive at the palace after receiving the invitation to be a Queen candidate. However, after word got around that you will be joining the fight for the title. All the ladies mutually agreed to resign. When he asked why, all the aide's replies were, "There is no other person worthy to be by your side other than the Princess."
Now, you stood in front of him. You were dressed beautifully, but not as extravagant as those ladies that came before him. You had a melodic tone in your voice that was pleasant to the ear. Your hands folded together gracefully. Everything about you was enchanting.
You tilt your head confused about his speechlessness. "Did I catch you in the wrong time?" you ask him.
His cheeks reddened, embarrassed that you left him dazed just from your introduction alone.
"No no," he excuses then coughs to get a grip on himself, "I apologize. I must have been tired from all the work this morning."
You give him an understanding smile and reply, "No apologies needed, your majesty. I feel honored to be here and see how hard you work. I'm sure this kingdom is grateful to have such a diligent King."
His blush intensifies from your non-stop flattery. He's heard many compliments in his life for his achievements. However, when you were the one saying those words. He can't help but believe it was all true with how genuine you sounded.
"Please, I'm quite embarrassed to hear such words from you, Princess. I've heard many tales of your acts of charity for your and other neighboring kingdoms. You've paved the way for others to follow in your example and gave a chance for the poor, homeless and orphaned," he redirected trying to calm his flaring cheeks.
He was pleasantly surprised at your reaction.
"P-Please! You've heard of that? Oh, I'm embarrassed! I hope only good thing reached your ears," you stumbled over your words when the attention turned back to you.
He laughs at you as you tried to hide behind your hair as you also flushed red. 'For someone, who gives out so many compliments. She can't even handle a couple of her own.'
'This wasn't such a bad idea,' he thought as he watched as you smile and continue talking to him.
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"(Y/n), can I ask you something?" he says sitting at the edge of the bed where you sat beside while reading a book.
It had been several weeks since your marriage and it's been quite busy for the both of you as you adjusted to your married life. Lucifer finished paperwork for his projects and formal preparations for your ascension to your rights as the new Queen. Thankfully, it had finally calmed down and now you helped him with his work and even the inner management of the castle.
You have shared the room since the beginning, and you've already shared your first night as husband and wife together. Which was.. quite passionate to say the least. But, after both of you would wake up earlier or later than the other, too considerate to wake up the other from their well-earned rest. So, now that it has finally calmed down and Lucifer approached you. You couldn't help but feel nervous.
"Of course, anything," you reply putting away the book and taking his hand in yours.
He smiles and gains courage as he caresses your hand back and says, "Are you okay with this arrangement?"
You tilt your head unsure of the meaning, "About what?"
"This," he gestures to the both of you, "are you okay about our marriage?"
You huff out a laugh relieved, you thought it was a life or death situation, "Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?"
He shrugs and replies, "I don't know. I just thought you were having doubts about us."
You give him a meaningful look and stood up from your spot. You then tugged him to stand with you. You made him hold your waist and hand while you placed yours on his shoulder. You led him into a slow dance with a smile on your face.
"Remember, our dance together?" you asked.
"At the wedding?" he asks.
You shook your head and laughed, "We danced one together way before that. That night where we shared the stars together."
His eyes lit up, remembering that night.
"During that dance, I thought that being with you will be worthwhile. And if wherever this choice leads me. I won't regret being with you, Lucifer," you say with a deep look in your eyes.
His eyes soften as he gazed at you. You were nothing but wonderful to him, it was childish of him to assume you were having doubts. He should have trusted you and made you happy instead. You deserve nothing less than that.
"Can we become more Than half of a union we're chosen for?"
He sings as he pulls you closer to him.
"Where I am your best half And I am yours,"
You continue with a huge smile on your face as you followed his lead, gliding around the room.
"Stuck here forever And hopefully not ending in estrangement,"
You sang together faces inching towards each other with half lidded eyes.
"Can mine become yours Combining our dreams Without keeping score?"
You twirled around the room with him catching you. He opens the door and leads you out into the halls where you continued your dance.
"Always together, but never bored No choice in the matter but This will never work without each other,"
The both of you laugh like children as you chased each other down the halls.
"Can we become we? (Can we become we?) Start a new line on this family tree,"
He catches up to you and lifts you off the ground and kisses your cheek with a hearty chuckle from your deviousness.
"Two hearts connected by one beat, Your hand in mine and,"
You beam him a smile as you placed your hands on his chest feeling the rhythmic thumping of his heart from chasing you around.
"I could never choose to love another," Lucifer whispers as he pulls you into a kiss which you return with fervor.
After minutes of kissing one another, he places you down and hold your waist as places another kiss on your temple with a beaming smile. You return it and let him lead you back to your room.
"Maybe one day I can learn to love you, too," you whisper as you gave a passing gaze at the portrait of a blonde woman with her face covered with a large cloth.
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