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#SO THEY HAVENT BEEN LOOKING FOR ANYONE NEW FOR LIKE
maaaxx · 4 months
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dont get me wrong i am more excited for this atla remake and the inevitable renaissance part 2 than i have ever been for anything in my life. however im also terrified of what changes this is going to bring to the fandom. Obviously the 2020 renaissance brought a lot of new and good things (zukka, a ton of amazing fics, etc). But more people joining the fandom means new people joining ao3 and interacting with fics and authors and artists too. Even in the few years that i've been active in fandom i've noticed a dramatic shift in how people interact with artists and authors especially. And I can't see this not getting worse as more people whose main social media experiences include tik tok and instagram coming to ao3 and tumblr. Like these people are used to content creators who revolve their content around what their audience wants because its their job, and I know this isnt going to translate well to the culture around ao3 writers especially when unconsolidated comments and 'advise' is already a problem for a ton of authors. And for people who dont understand that fics and fanart are supposed be transactional in the sense that you need to leave comments and kudos and reblog stuff when they're used to simply liking something *maybe* being enough. Idk whats going on with other fandoms, but I do know that these things have been an ongoing issue for the atla fandom and like I said, I can't imagine having another 'renaissance' and this stuff not getting worse.
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phantomrose96 · 1 year
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So I know this isn't anything that like actually needs an apology but it'll make me feel a bit better to say it. Oof whoops this ABoT chapter is super late. Timing kinda sucks since I wanted to have some updates out while s3 was airing but
Been kinda mega busy and stressed since October with the whole condo buying thing which rolled right into immediate day 0 plumbing and boiler issues I had to get fixed and general moving hassle and financial commitment stress and I kinda just fried myself hard. Plus then acclimating to a new place without my familiar street or familiar grocery store or familiar room or any of that. Like there's no "just go home and take your mind off it" to this cuz home is the "it". So I'm just kinda enduring until I can calm the hell down.
And anyway I definitely have progress on ch47, like 7000-ish words of it, but it's the kind of like "there is writing there" and hasn't exactly hit the "there is substance there" that I want ABoT chapters to be. Like this in particular is a chapter I want to be good, not just be done. So it's taking time to get my brain somewhere that can do that.
#anyway#i mean just in case anyone was like wondering if its discontinued to anything#its still going i just can't make it Good quite yet#(plus i need to get furniture cuz as it stands the place is really quite empty and bare except for like my room and the kitchen)#(also the bank had my address wrong so they havent been able to send me any of the mortgage information which was technically due already)#(ive been in contact with them but it's a whole thing)#(plus im still not quite finished with all the utility switching. i still need to get water in my name)#(and the boiler issue fucked up my gas bill so now ive got a crazy high gas bill i just need to... pay)#(i have actually started seeing a therapist but thats a whole other Thing now figuring out insurance and deductables and using my HSA#account and just... it's a lot)#(oh also my homeowner's insurance policy number doesn't actually work for getting me into the online portal. and the geico guy said he was#looking into it but I havent heard anything in a while)#(its a lot im just gonna melt for a while i guess)#(plus all the upfront stress has made it really hard to associate the new place as 'home' instead of 'place of great many plumbing evils')#(i sat on like 4 million couches this week and the only one i really really like probably doesn't quite fit in my living room)#(the downstairs neighbors tv is too loud and i need to talk to her about it in a way which isn't 'hey im holding on by a thread and this#one small inconvenience is the thing which is making me turn into ash')#(oh thats right i have to go pay my january HOA dues...)#(oh also I need to file for the owner-occupied tax exemption thing now that its 2023)#anyway......... ill be normal eventually. im just not normal right now.#chrissy speaks
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strangerhands · 2 months
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mmmmm heyyy👁️. ive basically been gone from tumblr for over two days because ive been feeling like a shitty piece of shit. BUT. i finally saw dune part 2 and ohmygoddddd it was so so good. but yes. i was missing leto so bad the entire time. Father come back pls. i need you.
#it was so good tho#like so cool i was internally freaking out about how cool things looked#the fight scenes🤌#the environments/settings🤌#all of the fuckin machinery🤌#the acting🤌#the everything🤌#yum#also i dont find austin butler attractive but funnily enough feyd was the only time ive found him hot😭 yes i have issues. but like. okayyy..#i watched it alone and i wish doing things alone wasnt seen as such a weird or sad thing like. theres nothing wrong with it#sorta vent->#but basically ive been feeling like an annoying piece of shit so ive been staying off of here for the most part#because ive been convincing myself no one likes me and everyone in my life would be better off without me😝😝#just tee bee ehch#and idk i was just feeling like ass and was doing nothing and when i finally would go to use tumblr i was already too tired to do shit#so i just went to sleep#and i was busy today#yesterday*#and ill probably be a bit busy today too but idk maybe hopefully ill catch up a bit#idk ya boys just been hating himself like usual but not as usual bc it was worse but it is what it is#i felt a bit better yesterday though#and also my new antidepressants ive been on havent been doing shit for me so im going back to a previous one i used to be on so yea#hopefully that helps soonish idk#i never vent on here so i feel kinda bad for doing so but i just wanted to puke my thoughts here#also since im already here complaining ive just like. not written at allllllll basically like i got into my head and made myself discouraged#so. that sucks. but also nothing out of the ordinary there#why does Everything i say sound so embarrassingly depressing and pathetic hhhhhhhgggggggggggggghhhghghg#anyways yea i was doing bad im still not doing good but hopefully will be a bit better so ill be back and caught up later today or tomorrow#idk if anyone gave a fuck or noticed but i just like complaining into the void so yea#talkin shit
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kenobihater · 3 months
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the last remaining threads of my sanity are slipping through my fingers rn 🚬 😑
#i'm out of cigarettes i'm incredibly ill and i'm reconsidering my relationship to a certain fandom.#look i'm NOT saying i'm gonna stop the divorce proceedings but uh. fuck. i may have been re reading some of my older works and unfinished#fics and i MAY. i repeat MAY. have some tiny shred of interest posting about st*r w*rs again#motherfucker i'm SO hesitant to speak that into existence and will be absolutley APOPLECTIC if it happens bc i don't fucking WANNA like sw!#i divorced it! i took the kids (my ocs) & filed a restraining order & crossed state lines & broke all contact and yet! and fucking yet!!!!#i find myself in tags i havent visited in over two years on the archive like some beaten dog slinking back home to a shitty master#i honestly hate like. fucking ALL of the shit i've written from then that i reread and some of it was so bad i couldnt even bring myself to#click on it after reading the summary. like. UGH! i have a half baked fic idea i wrote a little for and i think it's more compelling than#any of the literal dogshit i posted back then so i MIGHT work on polishing that up and posting something that isn't actual garbage by my#current standards. all of this is still up in the air tho bc i dont know if the hyperfixation or even the bare minimum lvl of interest has#returned or if it's just fever induced delirium. i've been having INCREDIBLY fucked up bad horrible awful vivid dreams as of late so fever#induced brain fuckery isn't out of the question. sigh. i'm so mad abt this#even if i do regain some interest in the fandom i don't think i'll have any interest in new source material after the mando s2 finale &#tbo.bf sucking ass & the obi show being mid & everything with the ST. i plan on watching ando.r but after that? zero interest in anything#new from sw. so. if anyone still reading this and is getting excited abt me POSSIBLY MAYBE being interested in sw just know i still hate it#a bit and feel like i'm being dragged kicking and screaming back into this mess unwillingly. or it's due to a fever. god i need a smoke#len speaks#that's literally the longest tag rant i've ever gone on. fuck that's a BAD sign
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oh my god i think i just had an epiphany
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jonny-b-meowborn · 8 months
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Dude I miss the feeling of being in love. Like no one ever loved me back and I've never been in a relationship, so I can't miss that, and while I'd love to date someone, I just really miss the feeling of having a crush on someone
#ive had only two serious crushes in my life#and while neither of them liked me back. it was still noce#when we were friends#but right now i dont even have that many friends i dont have anyone to have a crush on#like im demi so other than my friends i dont love people like that#and my friend circle has been getting smaller and smaller with years#ive had the closets friendships in high school before i failed a year#they moved on without me and that hurt me but im mostly fine with that now#the new class i had to join. i cant call anyone there a friend#im not talking with a single person from that class#not that i hated them all but i havent been close enough with anyone to call them friends#and now its just. my best friend that i met in my first class in high school#a friend from dorm#and like some family that im close with but yknow. thats not where im gonna look for a date lmao#and like. literally i have two close friends now#and im not interested in any of them#and like its one frustrating thing to not have a partner but a different thing is to not even have anyone that could become my partner#like i have no choices around me#and i just. feel lonely#and you know what i wish someone was interested in me romantically. never happened before.#even if thats not someone I'd like to be with i just. want to know its possible for someone to like me that way#cause like sure the cousin's cute friend is into me in some way but. not romantically#and that is cool as fuck to know i can be desirable but i also want to know if im lovable#does that make sense?#like its great to get that kind of attention but im ace theres nothing id do about that lmao#even if more people would find me hot that doesnt change the fact that no one ever found me. yknow. interesting?#idk im just at that age when most of my peers are either in relationships or were in relationships or at least tried to be#and its a bit frustrating#in my Single and Sad era lmao#bee buzz
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h3rmitsunited · 1 year
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I was going back through my old school stuff from like 1st grade and there was this like journal where we had to write like a couple sentences each day to practice writing and stuff and i had this one day where part of what I wrote was "I hate myself today because I had to change my card to yellow" (the cards were like discipline things so you started with green and if you weren't being good you had to stand up and go to the front of the class to change your card) and I don't remember what it was for but I'm sure I was just like maybe talking or something like that.
But like damn. Even just thinking about the times I had to change my cards in those classes makes me want to cry. I remember always being so upset anytime the teachers weren't happy with me and then I think about me now and how I'm always expecting people to think the worst of me or be hiding that they don't like me or always expecting the other shoe to drop even if they've been telling me I'm doing a good job because I'm bad and I need them to just tell me why and what exactly they're holding back
And I've got a review coming up at work soon with my bosses since it's almost my 6 year anniversary of working there and all I can think is oh good now they can stop telling me how great I am and how happy they are to have me there and just tell me everything I'm doing wrong because I know the compliments aren't right and they have to have been holding back what all my issues are.
And I think something in my upbringing may have kind of fucked my head up... just a little bit
#peeerrhaps i should start looking at therapists again to work on some isssssuuuueeesss....#the last one was not that helpful but she was the first person i looked at and tried and she did well enough#just didnt really get deep into anything under the surface#i literally cant take compliments. like idk if its like a youre supposed to be humble so dont let it go to your head thats turned into#dont internalize any praise ever but if anyone ever complains about you then its real and you should internalize it times a thousand#or maybe its just a i kinda hate myself and dont feel like i deserve good things or anything ever#i think some of it is im ashamed about my stupid inability to get to work on time. like if i force it and work myself up#maybe i can be on time like a few days in a row#but the momentum drops so fucking fast and then im back to well im here before we open even if i was supposed to be here 20 minutes ago#but also like i get there before stuff is going on and like its not that late and i havent mentioned the issue because#i feel like if i did theyd say oh well then just get here at the later time youve been arriving close to its fine#but then stupid brain will go okay so this is the new time which means that im going to shift to arriving even later#so i just have to keep relying on the shame and guilt and panic to get me there in the mornings#which is not fun#i just hope the review goes well other than my bad time management#i feel like it will... hopefully. theyve talked about possibly 'promoting me' which would be me doing the same stuff ive been doing#basically but then id just have the title (and pay 🤞) to go along with that#i dont want to get my hopes up but we'll see what happens#im going to like try super hard to get to work on time until the review though and like after but still#come on clarissa do a good job
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fleshdyke · 1 year
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absvejavbehevsn
#bad day. augh.#why is all the shit i get genuinely upset about so fucking stupid and insignificant#like literally it doesnt fucking matter no one cares….. stop being fucking dramatic ‼️#im so fucking done with school . its literally not wven that bad but i want to explode#like im perfectly fine talking in detail abt absolute atrocities being committed against my communities just across the border#but i’m so scared i cant fucking move when i don’t have anyone to sit with me at lunch. like its so fucking pathetic#the usual spot me and my friends eat in is closed for ramadan which is great but he havent established a new spot and my best friends keep#going off to be with their partners and wander around and i feel so fucking broken because they dont even like me anymore#like im too disabled to walk around this 5 story school and im too much of a fucking loser for anyone to even possibly want in the slightest#and two of my best friends just fucking leave with their partners because theyre not absolutely godawful people#and like i know i can’t be expectex to find someone in hs i know that logically but i feel so fucking broken#bc why doesnt anyone want me. why has no one ever fucking wanted me#the only time ive ever been wanted in my whole fucking life was when i was raped as a little kid and i want it back so fucking bad i wanf it#back i just want to be fucking wanted again#and i dont think anyones actually my friend like i dont think anyone actually likes me bc why would they#i hace to live with myself every minute of every day and i can tell why no one fucking likes me bc im so fucking annoying#ok nevermind . done now. my brother just walked into my room took one look at me ( i have very obviously been crying) and asked if i wanted#to watch him play minecraft#rambles#vent
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doebt · 1 year
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grandma bringing me corn chowder and a root beer..yayyipeeeeyippeeee
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herotune · 1 year
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guess who! 👽💃
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saturnsuv · 2 years
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</3
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catcontrolcenter · 2 years
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Honestly the biggest disappointment of the sims 4 ww is that you have to be a teenager and older to be one :/
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whenusawlove · 2 months
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one day i will be strong enough to actually say how i feel
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hecksupremechips · 5 months
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I love animal crossing and I’m about to become hyper fixated on it so teehee 💅
#the klock keeps ticking#hey listen listen up real good#you know what ive been doing these past few months? nothing#and by ‘nothing’ i dont just mean that i havent done anything ‘productive’#ie working making money studying what have you#i mean ive literally been doing nothing#in this house i exist as nothing more than an oversized decorative pillow#i dont speak. i eat when no one is looking so i dont cause trouble#i dont have any interests that are known to anyone and i dont leave and i dont feel#and it came crashing down last week just absolutely horrible i have no energy nothing left#and then i was just like. talking to a special person and mention animal crossing and my extensive experience with it#and they also talk about their love of discovering life in nature like insects and mushrooms#and i realized that i just. really wanna play animal crossing again#and i did! i finally did! i finally let myself do a happy thing thats fun and not productive!#and i decided id experience the life the nature of it and i just kept catching all the fish i saw!#spent so much time just doing that and ive donated to the museum too!#when new horizons came out i made a goal to actually donate to the museum cuz it looked cool as hell and i had never cared about the museum#in the past#but i fell off that wagon pretty quickly and all together kinda stopped catching fish and bugs#and then without even trying to i just. started noticing them and ended up donating#and im so like. proud of myself for accomplishing an actual goal ive had and that i had fun doing it cuz i was just letting myself be#and im proud that i let myself do something fun again#cuz guess what fuckers i actually did stuff ive been putting off doing like applying to jobs that may actually happen#and i get to see my bestie tomorrow for the first time in a while 😎#anyways yeah my character is very cute and tangy sent me a letter saying she loves me and im her bff and i cried
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asakurahaos · 1 year
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Mom keeps asking me to go w her to the mall and tbh i wouldnt mind going even tho usually hate going shopping but i feel so disgusted by my appearance
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maplesyrupsainz · 3 months
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˖⁺。˚⋆˙bows before bros | LN4 ˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: lando norris x actress!reader y/n (she/her)
genre: social media au
warnings: sooo super fluffy!!
summary: in which a trail of bows leads to everyone's new fav grid couple
a/n: feel like i havent written for lando in ages so here we are!!
request!!!: I’d like to request an au for lando where y/n’s an actress who’s getting recognized more and more, she’s really humble and sweet but pretty similar to lando as a goofy and funny girly(idk why but I picture Sabrina carpenter vibes) 🎀 if u could add a little scene of some of the f1 drivers and wags reacting to their relationship/talking to the media how they’ve never seen lando so happy. Just a sappy and goofy couple living life (manifesting✨🕯️)
fc: sabrina carpenter
my masterlist
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by reneerapp, sydney_sweeney, and 301,283 others
yourusername sooo where else can i put bows? 🎀
view all 6,918 comments
user1 omg the bunny is so cute im going to do that
user2 i dont wear bows in a coquette way i wear bows in an y/n y/l/n way
liked by yourusername
user3 i love seeing y/n in her movies so srs then going on her ig & it's jus this
reneerapp put them on your hand soap 🥺
yourusername you make jokes but i really will do that
user4 LOL as u should y/n!!!
user5 oh i love her
sydney_sweeney this is so real of you!!
yourusername i knew you'd get it
sydney_sweeney bows before bros ‼️
yourusername louder 🗣️
landonorris
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liked by sydney_sweeney, danielricciardo, and 819,055 others
landonorris you got my heart loud.
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user6 okay simp lando?
user7 HUH????
user8 looking a LOT like a soft launch i cant lie to u
user9 thts what i was thinking.....
user10 the bows...... anyone one else thinking what im thinking?
user11 DONT EVEN SAY IT
user12 VERY y/n y/l/n coded
user13 y/n was here vibes
oscarpiastri simp simp simp
landonorris shutup pastry boy
yourusername posted a story
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liked by sydney_sweeney, daisyedgarjones, and 89,541 others
user14 so cute ily y/n
user15 my spidey senses are tingling
user16 is this a hint that ur dating lando norris.
user17 feels very very targeted miss y/n
user18 our bow queen 🙇‍♀️
twitter ->
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instagram ->
landonorris posted a story
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liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, and 159,701 others
user22 omg y/n y/l/n is ur gf fr
user23 never thought i'd see the day lando norris pulled
user24 THE BOW AND THE MCLAREN HOODIE AHHH
user25 the most y/n thing i've ever seen
danielricciardo she's made you soft
landonorris she definitely hasnt i'll tell you that much
danielricciardo right. not what i meant but great to know thank you so much
yourusername
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liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 661,328 others
yourusername feeling orange 🍊
view all 16,754 comments
user26 oh my god
user27 is this the hard launch
mclaren your best look yet, y/n!
yourusername 🤭 feel very honoured
user28 next we want orange bows
liked by yourusername
sydney_sweeney sports 🤢 but make it girly 🎀
yourusername me with everything
landonorris it's papaya y/n we've been over this
yourusername there isnt a papaya emoji ✨🎀💕🫶🍊
user29 omg they're first public interaction...?
user30 they're in love i called it.
interviews ->
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twitter ->
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instagram ->
landonorris posted a story
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liked by lilymhe, carlossainz55, and 157,814 others
user36 omg lol
user37 THAT'S Y/N'S CAT
user38 lol at ur response to ur friends saying ur obsessed with a girl is to post her cat on ur story with bows on
sydney_sweeney one of us now
landonorris this feels like a cult
user39 the coquettification of lando norris
user40 the y/nification of lando norris
landonorris
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liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, and 1,091,727 others
landonorris my response to everyone talking about me recently is you would be the same if you bagged a girl like mine
tagged: yourusername
view all 22,183 comments
user41 A GIRL LIKE MINEEEEE
user42 how did he do it
lilymhe congratulations 🥂
carlossainz55 yippee!!
oscarpiastri we are all beyond proud of you lando
danielricciardo good for you bro
charles_leclerc happy for you
mclaren our fav girl!!
yourusername 🤭🧡
user43 all the celebrations in the comments 💀
user44 they had no faith in him fr
yourusername blushing and giggling at this!!! i love my lil lando!!!!!
landonorris you what?
yourusername i wont be taking questions at this time
landonorris you love me so bad
landonorris i love you so bad
THE END 🧡
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