#SOAP COME BACK

[crashnbrn]

[that-thing-in-the-closet]

SOOOOOAP SOAP NONONO NO SOAP

[inkskinned]

love when men cry about body hair bc "it's hygiene" and yet 15% of cis men leave the bathroom without washing their hands at all and an additional 35% only just wet their hands without using soap. that is nearly half of all men. that means statistically you have probably shaken hands with or been in direct contact with one of these people.

love when men say that women "only want money" when it turns out that even in equal-earning homes, women are actually adding caregiver burdens and housework from previous years, whereas men have been expanding leisure time and hobbies. in equal-earning households, men spend an average of 3.5 hours extra in leisure time per week, which is 182 hours per year - a little over a week of paid vacation time that the other partner does not receive. kinda sounds like he wants her money.

love that men have decided women are frail and weak and annoying when we scream in surprise but it turns out it's actually women who are more reliable in an emergency because men need to be convinced to actually take action and respond to the threat. like, actually, for-real: men experience such a strong sense of pride about their pre-supposed abilities that it gets them and their families killed. they are so used to dismissing women that it literally kills them.

love it. told my father this and he said there's lies, damned lies, and statistics. a year ago i tried to get him to evacuate the house during a flash flood. he ignored me and got injured. he has told me, laughing, that he never washes his hands. he has said in the last week that women are just happier when we're cooking or cleaning.

maybe i'm overly nostalgic. but it didn't used to feel so fucking bleak. it used to feel like at least a little shameful to consider women to be sheep. it just feels like the earth is round and we are still having conversations about it being flat - except these conversations are about the most obvious forms of patriarchy. like, we know about this stuff. we've known since well before the 50's.

recently andrew tate tried to justify cheating on his partner as being the "male prerogative." i don't know what the prerogative for the rest of us would be. just sitting at home, watching the slow erosion of our humanity.

[s0fter-sin]

everyone makes fun of soap when they find out how many hair and skin products he keeps on hand. the cabinet in his bathroom is filled to bursting and he always keeps travel sized bottles on him on missions

when soldiers outside the 141 find out, they call him precious and self-obsessed, a vain pretty boy too preoccupied with his reflection to focus on the enemy. no wonder how he got his callsign. price has given up telling him to leave them on base and just teaches him to individually wrap them so they don’t rattle against each other and give himself away

what they don’t know is that each product contains an ingredient that when mixed with any number of the others, creates potent chemical bombs. he was caught unarmed once, he won’t let it happen again

[furiosophie]

((zombie ghost this, zombie ghost that, what about eldritch!soap who came back wrong??))

[temeyes]

[gomzdrawfr]

it's hard loving yourself

[ccarrot]

HE SAID "come back to me chuuya" THAT'S FUCKING WORSE

[angelfishcake]

I need everyone to see this

[maiamars]

(insert Take Me Back To Eden by Sleep Token)

[soaqrudyz]

immortal soap au but ghost is yelling and panicking because “why don’t you ever listen to me?! you could’ve been killed!” and soap just smiles sadly, holds him close, and tells him that he isn’t going anywhere, promise.

“you can’t guarantee that, soap! you can’t promise i won’t lose you!”

“oh love,” and he squeezes him that much tighter for all his troubles, “you’ve no idea.”

and really, he didn’t. he had no clue that soap had seen and loved every version of him throughout history, that they’d laughed and kissed and left their fingerprints on every continent, or that he’d still love him centuries in the future when they did this song and dance for the trillionth first time.

[saragapen]

Scorpions from the past

[whatev-i-guess]

Soap: What if we build a house together? Ghost: Made out of ashes and dust? Soap: How about wood and stone? Ghost: Won't make it til the day we can retire. Soap: We don't have to wait until we retire. Let's call it our side project.

...

Ghost putting the urn onto the fireplace: We've got our house, Johnny. But now it will never feel like home.

[s0fter-sin]

“simon riley’s dead,” ghost chokes out; bitter resentment coating his tongue. “i’m just wearin’ ‘is corpse.”

mactavish doesn’t shy from his venom; sees through his hiss and doesn’t fear his rotten-fanged bite. he reaches out, pressing the flat of his hand to his breast and ghost damns himself for the way his breath catches; for the way his shoulders curl in around it in a silent plea for it to stay.

“that’s no drum in your chest,” he whispers defiantly.

his hand slowly drags over his chest, coming to rest over his sternum and he feels its possession like a brand against his skin.

“it ain’t bellows inflating your lungs,” he dares and he involuntarily inhales; his body longing to rise to his challenge.

mactavish pushes and he rocks back on his heels just to sway in closer; just to beg for the pressure to chase the phantom weight of six feet of dirt from his bones.

“you’re far from rigor mortis, riley,” he promises and there’s air at ghost’s back instead of decaying wood and infested flesh. “i won’t let the earth take you from me yet.”

[ghouljams]

Ghost and Goose are autism4adhd and I think that’s beautiful. I don’t need to explain myself on this. I’m just gonna write out some small moments of them caring for each other's needs, plus Ghost being Murphy’s least favorite customer.

You hold out a pair of earplugs for Simon as he walks past you, feeling his fingers close over them quickly. He twists them into his ears as he goes to help Soap set up the arsenal of fireworks he bought. When he comes back to you he settles a hand on your lower back, appreciative. He doesn’t have to say anything.

-

You snap at Gaz when he tries to ask you about horse tack and Simon looks at you like his ears are burning. He makes a soft motion with his hands, waving them back and forth. You shake out your whole body to try and get yourself back to equilibrium. When that doesn’t work he comes over and roughs up your hair until you’re laughing and pushing at his hands. 

-

You and Soap have been chattering in overlapping voices about almost nothing for the last hour. Simon’s leg bounces rapidly as he sits next to you trying to focus on the game. He stands and leaves without a word, you smack a hand over Soap’s mouth when he tries to call him out on it.

- 

Simon grabs Soap by the back of the neck and hauls him out of the kitchen before you even notice he’s there. Your brain laser focused on the budget sheets laid out across the table.

“You’re a cruel man starvin’ me like this,” Soap complains.

“You just had lunch,” Simon tells him shortly, “Let Goose work.”

-

You hand Simon your monthly list and make sure he knows your prices are non-negotiable. Murphy swears as soon as he cozies up to the counter. Simon sets the list down, slides it towards the old man with his fingers.

“What do you want first?” Murphy eyes him, eyes the list.

“Corn feed.”

“50 a bag.”

“15.” Simon tells him smoothly, Murphy sputters.

“15? 15!? You’re out of your spectral mind if you think I’m going as low as-”

“15.” Simon repeats.

“Now 40! I could maybe do 40,” Murphy tries, “40 would be reasonable!” Simon stares at him.

“15.” He says firmly.

“If you were asking for 25 I would consider us friends! 15! You’re trying to put me out of business!” Murphy presses his hand to his heart, “Have you no sympathy? I’m an old man, just trying to make an honest living before I pass on.”

“I’d put you in your late 60s, hardly old,” Simon tells him, “15.”

“If you think-”

“15.”

“If Goose thinks!”

“It’s 15.”

“Alright it’s 15,” Murphy sighs, jotting down the fair price on his notepad. “You know you really take the fun out of this.”

“I get that a lot.”

[a-small-writer-in-a-big-world]

No I cannot accept Soap’s death because why did out of all the people GRAVES, the worse war criminal who nearly killed all of Las Almas (as in the population of the city) gets to live and Soap A MAIN CHARACTER gets to die?

There was no reason to bring Graves back just as there was no reason for Soap to die.