#This one I'm reading now talks about a young gay guy that has been literally raped and is dealing with that now while he falls in love and

[will80sbyers]

Ok I have officially learned that when the book has those goofy but cute drawings as a cover and it's supposedly about a queer romance in reality it will be a book about trauma and heavy topics like abuse and worse

[chaos-and-sparkles]

I yearn to talk about my Dracula!Holmes au, and the universe has seen fit to give me free will and internet access, so talk i shall.

Listen. Hear me out just hear me out.

We literally have Johnathan motherfucking Harker whose written POV we read Dracula from for like a solid half of the book, right. Well, no more, he's John Watson now babeyyy, a retired army man now gainfully employed as a lawyer who's off overseas to act as estate agent to the strange and eccentric client who has expressed interest in moving to foggy London... Count Holmes! [insert jazz hands]

Instead of being Evil(tm) and plotting to take over London or whatever, my guy is just Autistic. Also riddled with ADHD and in desperate need of some enrichment in he goddamn enclosure. He will also in fact be trans, because. Of course. Vampirism as a metaphor for queerness and the social ostracization that follows as a punishment and having inherently queer narratives intertwined in them etc etc... anyhow! Count Sherlock Holmes, vampire detective!!!

(I do also want him to be aroace, or aroacespec at least, but I'm willing to negotiate for the Johnlock and the Johnlock alone.)

Mina Harker here is of course the one and only Mary Morstan, although it is clearly a lavender marriage, because we aren't cowards in this household and so Mary gets to be gay with her Lucy equivalent here, just as god intended. I haven't decided who her Lucy equivalent will be yet but this au is still young (technically I've been going insane about it in my mind for like a month or two but whatever) and there's no reason we can't make up an OC for her Lucy.

John Watson, resident gay doctor lawyer, of course, is smart enough to realize the enigmatic Count Holmes' vampiric secret within like one adventure, but he sure is going to have a slow burn of realizing just how gay he is for said enigmatic Count Holmes. We, of course, get to witness this tooth rotting bullshit firsthand as we read his diary entries and some later letters to Mary.

And instead of being one long gothic horror narrative, it's just adventure of the week with your friendly neighborhood crime solving vampire, the various other mythical creatures who do said crimes, and Just Some Guy.

Just, every Sherlock Holmes adventure adapted into this au with other supernatural elements. The guy from the Red Headed League is a local villager being bamboozled by a leprechaun, the Silver Blaze thing is about a kelpie. Everyone including Sherlock was operating on the assumption that Irene Adler was a siren, but actually she was just a regular human, and instead of unlearning misogyny (bc I don't see trans vampire Sherlock living so long through changing times and society and being sexist), Sherlock has to learn not to underestimate the intelligence of humans.

Also, he's just really excited to have this new human, John, living in his castle. So curious, too, about humans, he has sequestered himself from them for such a long time and John seems like a very interesting one. He's probably the first friend Sherlock has had in a long time, too.

Also. Instead of being warded off or harmed by garlic, to Sherlock, garlic is just the vampire version of cocaine. He just gets high as fuck off garlic. Could live on the stuff. And the reason people think he's warded off by garlic is just because he was seen getting high off his ass, turning into a bat, and flying away in loop de loops upon consuming garlic one (1) time. And everyone thought it's his weakness. And he never bothered correcting them bc Why Would He. He's basically getting free cocaine left and right from villagers who are scared/wary of the supernatural Count Holmes and only go to him when there's no other option, and it's no bother to leave people he's not investigating alone.

I genuinely do think cocaine!garlic addicted Sherlock has so much comedic potential, it really is so beloved to me. Just imagine, if you will, an extremely put-upon John Watson caring for Batlock who has gotten high off his ass and refuses to stop flying into his own antique chandelier.

I was also thinking that it would be funny to have Mrs. Hudson and Mrs. Turner in place of Dracula's sexy vampire roommates or whatever those three were lmao (I couldn't think of a third character, sorry)

Also. Obviously. Van Helsing has got to be Moriarty, by virtue of opposition. I do think their whole deal has a lot of potential to be very funny and entertaining also. I am also considering it might be fun to have Lucy's other suitors be the Scotland Yarders, like Lestrade, Gregson and what have you, but that risks missing out on the very fun possible dynamic of "Sherlock being exasperated with the dumbass out of their depth Yarders he keeps helping" raised to like the hundredth degree so. I honestly would like people's thoughts on that.

Anyway so YES, Dracula au please and thank you. Maybe with endgame QPR Johnlock? Yes? Please? Queerplatonic husbands Johnlock is my shit.

In conclusion: THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK <3

[ars-matron]

The Tarot Sequence Reread

Nothing has given me brain rot in a long while like the Tarot Sequence by K D Edwards has. And since I just finished reading all the supplemental stuff right when my hold for The Last Sun came back up I thought I would do something I have only done once before-and in a much less flattering way for a book I hated-and live blog my reread.

There's just so much in this series I need to pay closer attention to. And usually I would go on here and read some metas, but there is literally nothing!! The only things in the tags for this series is people wishing there were more people reading it, a handful of very wonderful fanarts, and an account of the decline of a discord that evidently used to exist for it. So, maybe this will encourage some people to read the books too.

Because there are some heavy topics in this series anytime I talk about such topics I will tag for them, but if they don't come up in the chapters I'm reviewing, I won't. So if you have certain things back listed you might not see all my posts on it. Anyone who is reading along and is curious about it can DM me.

NOW! Predictions and things I want to pay attention to under the cut for spoiler reasons.

The Tower. At the end of the prologue of the first book my thoughts were, " So we trust NO ONE!!" Except Queenie, because why would Rune and Brand live with her if she was evil? Then the children showed up and I had to trust them, they were too young to be part of the, whole thing, plus they are so cute. You have to trust them. And then Addam came along, and of course we trust him, he's an Addam, he's a giant dancing teddy bear and I love him! So I read the whole series (that's out so far) expecting we would find out the Tower was an evil guy, that he had had something to do with the fall of the Sun Throne. Honestly by the end of the third book I didn't think that any longer, and I was starting to before that after finding out he was also Qunn's godfather because!!! There is no way Qunn wouldn't have seen if the Tower revealed he had been a part of all that. (I'm still asking myself HOW exactly he or Mayan wouldn't have noticed an astral projection listening device being installed in Rune's room at their freaking tower that is super locked down! But then it happened for two other locations that were supposed to be super warded and protected my other companions too. So maybe it isn't his fault. I do think he might blame himself, I do think that some of his stand-offishness might also be guilt for not being able to stop the attack on the Sun Throne to start with. We will see...) I'm going to go into this read through with the assumption he is just lonely and sad and not a bad guy.

QUEENIE!!!! Because, WHO THE FUCK IS QUEENIE!? I was already suspicious because every time someone asks Rune and Brand where she came from, or how long she's been with them, they say "She's been with us forever." Every time! It reeks of mind fuckery. Then Eidolon and the epilogue that wasn't came along. Current theory is that she is the Empress, and also that she's probably Rune's mother. I would be willing to bet she was the woman at the end of the third book who spoke up to the river after everyone else. Edwards did a good job of making her disappear in the background, but I'm gonna be hunting for every mention of her and how she acts around everyone.

Ciaran, just because I love him and at first also suspected him of evil deeds. But he's just your gay vodka uncle and he loves all his adopted family so much and I just want to keep a closer on him at the start of the series.

Kellum. We only see him once in the second book, but he's mentioned in Eidolon by the Fool (Or Queenie pretending to be the Fool, again I'm not sure, there's Queenie interference for sure) And he was in one of the supplemental novellas. I think he will be making a bigger appearance in the next book.

Quinn's prophecies. I'll probably make a list of those for a separate master post.

Tallas. The Atlantean soul mates. This is a MAJOR spoiler. Rune says that Brand and he formed a talla bond the night of the attack. That it was what brought Brand out of the geas and got them to safety. The bond was gone when he woke up in the hospital and he's spent this whole time thinking he's somehow broken their talla bond. Something definitely happened between him and Addam in the Westlands, and I don't think Addam was wrong in assuming it was the budding of a talla bond. Because something sort of bond-like is also there now after the Hourglass Throne, after he used his bond with Brand to get him and Addam back to their time. My theory here is that they might be each other tallas, all three of them. Together. We know that it doesn't have to be a sexual relationship, though I don't think Addam would mind that one bit. Everything is pointing to the three of them being tied together somehow, and my theory is mostly that, before they were together together, no one talla bond could form and take precedence over the other. Now that they are together all the time, going on missions, living together, they have more opportunities for a bond to fully form and take hold. Assuming it involves all three of them.

And with that, I'm going to go read!

[pluckyredhead]

Shipping ask: Tim/Bernard?

Hoo boy. Don't ship it, alas.

Why don't you ship it?

Listen. I WOULD LOVE TO. I am thrilled that Tim has finally been allowed to come out after being really really queer for...oh, 33 years? But DC has just completely dropped the ball. @irolltwenties said a lot of what I'm feeling here, but I'm opinionated so I'm gonna say it myself, too.

The short version: DC refuses to let Bernard have a personality or let Tim have any relationship with him beyond the most superficial, empty window dressing possible.

The long version: I remember Bernard, y'all. I'm an old lady who was actually reading his original appearances when they came out! He was a weird, annoying kid who thought that being aggressively "quirky" made him cool when it actually just made him obnoxious...which allowed him to circle back around to being endearing. He liked to hear himself talk. He enjoyed being a tour guide, gossiping, and conspiracy theories - he's the guy who likes to know things, or at least seem like he does. Whether you liked him or not (I liked him), he was specific.

Now? The only thing recent comics will tell you about Bernard is that he's blond. Tim might as well be dating a cardboard cutout, or a post-it that says "Boyfriend" on it. Is he gay or bi, or does he prefer a different label, or none at all? Did he always have a crush on Tim, or is this new? Was his vocal interest in Darla and Tim's stepmother Dana just performative, or was he actually into them? What does he do when he's not smiling blandly under a narration box full of exposition? Does he have hobbies? Does he have a personality?

I do have to disagree with my beloved @irolltwenties on one thing: I don't think Tim is getting all the development in this relationship. I don't think Tim's gotten any, either. He told Bernard that he wanted to date him in August of 2021, but have we progressed in any significant way with his character since then? He spent three issues of Urban Legends agonizing over his sexuality in a way that was so repressed he wouldn't even admit that was what he was doing, but how does he feel about it now? He hasn't said in a comic whether he's gay or bi or pan or even queer - and look, I'm not saying he needs to know what label he prefers, or whether he needs to use one at all. But that should be a character choice too! We don't know if he has an identity he's comfortable with, or isn't sure yet, or is rejecting all of them, or is refusing to think about it. We literally don't know anything about Tim's sexuality except that it includes Bernard, including how Tim feels about it.

We also haven't gotten to see him come out to a single person. Again, I don't want to reduce queer narratives to cliches, but like...it's very weird that it's happened off-panel repeatedly? With Bruce, with Steph, with Young Justice. I'm assuming the rest of his family knows, based on...exposition about Damian that doesn't even make sense. We don't get to see this fucking conversation with Dick? Are you KIDDING me? Some of us have been waiting literal decades for Tim to come out and we get absolutely zero of the emotional catharsis of that? It feels like we're being cheated, honestly it does.

And speaking of being cheated...we never did get to see that Tim and Bernard date. Or a conversation about their history, or liking boys, or literally anything ever. When was their first kiss? I WOULD HAVE LIKED TO SEE THE FIRST TIME TIM KISSED A BOY. I THINK A LOT OF PEOPLE WOULD HAVE LIKED THAT. We don't even know how long they've been dating - Tim's current mini said it's been "months" and "a month" in the same issue. Go, DC, give us nothing!

I don't know why Tim's sexuality and his relationship with Bernard are being handled like this. Is it because they're afraid that if they allow it to be three dimensional it won't be sealed in its "unproblematic queer rep" mylar bag and board anymore? Is it because they're trying to get credit for Bi Tim while leaving it as vague as possible to not offend homophobes? Is it because they're just doing a crappy job? It's so strange to me because that first Urban Legends story was so good, and I really was rooting for Meghan Fitzmartin because it is so, so hard to be a woman in comics. But so far, it's just been a disappointment.

2. What would have made you like it?

If we had actually gotten weird, annoying OG Bernard, I feel like that would have been very entertaining - Tim is such a reserved character that I always enjoy seeing him play off against someone chaotic (Steph, Kon and Bart, even Jason to an extent). Also just like...seeing the actual relationship on the page??? I'm begging here, DC.

3. Despite not shipping it, do you have anything positive to say about it?

I am strongly in favor of the concept! Tim dating a boy is long overdue. I just need DC to give me specific characters in a specific relationship, ON THE PAGE.

[ethicstownpod]

If it's alright, I'd really like to hear more about January's 'Some Kinda Gender'. I understand it might be a spoiler/private so no pressure I'm just really interested

I think everything January is and/or isn't going to do in coming seasons is fun to find out as it happens. We've heard him do a lot of thinking about things he's done, but really only 1.5ish episodes thinking about what he's actually like as a person. And, more importantly, what he'd like to be like as a person. That is, if he can even get over the fact that he isn't one.

But I'm more than happy to talk generally about gender performance in s1 and generally. Buckle up, it's probably going to be a bit of a long one! I'm really into this, lol.

So before I really got to know any of the St Kilda cast I got to see most of them act at table reads. Spectacular experience, they're all incredible actors and fascinating people. But Rhys and I were never at a table read together, so the first time I properly met him he was just a regular human guy. As the script Naomi was working on currently stood he was going to play someone's boyfriend and I was like 'yeah, sure. This is a human man who could be a boyfriend.'

Then at like 2am the director came in and was like 'English accent! You're the villain now!' We'd been hanging out for a couple hours at that point. Rhys is vibrant, but a very gently spoken person. And I wasn't at all thinking 'Oh no, he can't do that' because like,,, that's his job. But I was very interested to see what he would do.

The first time I see him on set he has the whole villain get-up on and it is camp. Not in a camp-but-as-a-compliment way, thought it was cool af, but literally 2000s cartoon queer villain camp. Slicked hair and make-up that matched his suit. And I was like okay, damn, blinked and this dude got a whole new gender, good for him.

And then, to no one's surprise and to my absolute delight, he acted the fuck out of that campy outfit. Snippy and cocky and commanding. And obviously I knew, y'know, from being alive, that anyone performing 'camp villain' is doing a specific gender performance, but it was so cool to see someone I had got to know out of costume do that.

So I was thinking about this - and the other times I'd seen Rhys act in the interim - when I was doing final script edits/deciding what January/Ian would sound like. January was always going to have his voice actor's natural accent (as long as they weren't American, lol) and that was intentional.

The only actual vocal note I gave Rhys when coming up with an Ian voice was to go deeper, but I also told him that ep 8 was kind of Ian's campy villain monologue. He's just talking to hear the sound of his own voice at that point, he could have just killed Artemis and saved himself a lot of trouble.

Ian, as he tells you, has been pretending to be this January persona the whole time. And for most of episode 8 you have no reason not to believe him. His name is Ian. He can prove he was putting on a voice. He has a wife, not a spouse (yeah, I know a wife is a spouse, but he'd never say wife, would he... hmm...), a teenage daughter, not two young children. And everything January said was a lie.

BUT THEN! He gets upset, and his voice just... slips. That doesn't tend to happen when you're speaking in your natural accent.

Ian is just a persona too. He's this hyper-masculine husband, father, son, politician, bread-winner type turned old-timey camp-horror-villain and that's all a performance.

More importantly than being Ian, January isn't real. He isn't an anxious, fumbling, queer-in-a-librarian-kind-of-way radio host. But he also isn't this super-masc intimidating politician type; hence, when we actually meet Ian he's just,, kinda gay.

Everything is a performance for January and it must be exhausting. Someone just decided he was a human man one day, and sure he wants to be a human man, but he has no idea how to do that. He needs a break to figure out who he is. Unfortunately he instead did some murdering about it, so he probably won't get one.

[joesmemes]

THINGS SAID IN THE GROUP CHAT SENTENCE STARTERS

Assembled by @sheenathehyena.

I gave you a beach house now be normal

It's just so fucking ridiculous it circles back around to being poignant

I'm fine but what an inconsiderate toolbox

the fucking white boi who is trying to "find himself" that you meet all of once at the beginning

Yeah you want me to shoot my baby batter all over you cover you with almost - children

YOUR PLANET'S HOPE IS SONIC THE HEDGEHOG'S TRANS ASSHOLE

Not sure how to feel about talking to actual fucking yakuza members for entertainment purposes

On a scale of Balan Wonderworld to Silent Hill, how are you dealing with your trauma?

Roses are red, violets are blue, singular they is older than singular you

Concerned Ape noises

You ever think about the fact that [name] really said "the birds work for the bourgeoisie" & they were right

My patience for slipping over improperly spilled blood has run out.

If you can see the bones of your whipped pupil, you failed.

You know the healer's oath: Only do moderate harm to those who cross you.

Man I don't know if lack of shame is a blessing or a curse.

Parsooth m'lady but would you be so kind as to partake of the exquisite past time of role playing?

So they aren't DENYING the piss kink

uhm you need to be more of a doormat…..your boundaries are making me uncomfy 😦

That's HARLEQUIN NOVEL descriptors of sex

where is my mouse arrow? where is it holy fuck

fetishize urself ig

It's always people with feet fetishes or fat fetishes that be so open about it

Look at this unhinged mother fucker

Fuck you I hope your pice of shit family burn in a dumpster fire

Sorry you had to overshare about a tough time with some random chick in school but it's not relavent to my cat at all.

We're at a sword store and it's full of exactly what you'd expect.

Nobody was reading Lemony Snicket going "teehee they made Count Olaf bitch sauce"

Wikipedia I love you but your donation pleas sound like a lying teenager begging for money online

There's no right way to look at the guy that tossed his baby off a cliff and say "I think he needs to look cool for a minute there" is all I'm saying

Okay, wonderful. GREAT, take them all. Please leave immediately

one time I ran a server and I was being weird so I changed literally everyone's nickname to Frank

AKGHDLK I'm gonna SOB they asked if they could share their ticklefics

heavy meals always make me HONK MIMIMIMIMI

I found a fucking book of Mormon lmafo

lemme go take a dump and ill set it up

THREE. THREE TIMES. HE'S BEEN ARRESTED FOR INSIDER TRADEING THREE FUCKING TIMES.

tell her it was you who farted, establish dominance

I have been hoarding vidya games for the three of us to play like a dragon

Nearly had a heart attack because I was poopin and saw blood but realized it was my period

Ok we need to get a big cardboard box and a vaguely feminine scarecrow dressed as a boyfriendless girl

Puts my head in your lap like a cat

Some Filipinos wanna buy your titty mousepads

the chris chan trials are about to be the depp vs heard trial for people who had unrestricted internet access at a young age

Now u will screenshot us talking shit and put it in the callout 😭

GUYS I NEED PROOF THAT [name] IS GAY TO STICK IT TO A 19 YEAR OLD ALT RIGHT IDIOT

🙂 our fursona is gonna b friends with sonic

I both love and hate [name]’s writing. How they go from ancient purple prose to “oh shit oh fuck”

i guess you could say…. this was a triumph

[beanghostprincess]

I am so delighted to see we can send platonic ship and that you are insane about it!! (same here i love it so so much, tahat all my life) so what about Nami&Robin or/and Nami&Zoro

there are so many people asking me my opinions i can't believe y'all actually care about what i have to say ilysm <33

nami/robin: i love them and i wish they had more scenes together in canon :(( i love that they share a room and their beds are literally next to each other. i'm sure that they cuddle when they sleep. no doubt about it. robin reads out loud while nami does her nightly routine with makeup and stuff and then they talk for a bit before falling asleep. i love that they're the only girls in the crew but their role isn't just that. they both keep the guys in place but robin has that silly, satiric dark side that scares nami sometimes, and nami has that impulsive, thief side that robin loves too. and kjsdcjksdnjkasd they make me ill. they have girl nights. they go shopping. they talk shit about people together. they eat sanji's food together. nami talks about how much she misses her girlfriend (vivi, i miss you too. come back) and robin comforts her but instantly nami complains about her "not getting it" because she has her husband on the damn ship!!!!! then nami goes and hugs robin back again. i think they're the smartest and brightest girls ever and they deserve all the love. neither of them has ever had real friends and now that they have the chance to live freely, they finally can hang out together. robin is older and tbh i think she sees nami as this cute, young, brilliant girl with so so much potential. and nami sees robin as, like, this older, mature woman that's also her bestie and that's awesome!!! a lot of people ship them romantically but i personally see them as besties or sisters ngl. i think robin is still getting used to having friends like a normal person and nami teaching her how to enjoy life is so,,, so beautiful,,, they also have their own shenanigans and i need them to have wayyy more scenes together c'mon!!!

nami/zoro: i am so not shutting up about them i apologize- i love them. i am obsessed with them. we need to talk more and more about them. "they're overrated" they should be. they deserve it. i fucking love everything about these two. so, so much... the thing that makes me like them it's probably the fact that they're part of the romance dawn trio, and i'm very nostalgic about those three. they're all important to luffy, of course, all of his nakama are. but... there's just something about zoro and nami being the first ones that makes me insane. they're the ones that had to deal with luffy together when they first met, and ever since, they've just been sooo chaotic. i'm happy opla gave them scenes together (uhhh not so much the fact that people see them romantically. it's obvious they wanted to make them romantic. please don't, netflix, i'm watching you) because they mean so much to me! they have this lesbian/gay solidarity and hostility (yes, at the same time) that i LOVE. i'm obsessed with zoro being all edgy-wannabe (he's just quiet lmfao his dramatic gay ass wanting to be a dark swordsman is so funny) and nami like "??? shut up you're just dumb". the fact that they argue and zoro complains about her manipulative behavior but still always helps her and saves her every time,,, that's so,,, i love them. i know we all say zoro is luffy's guard dog, but that's not true. zoro is luffy's cat and nami's guard dog. he stays behind nami protectively with a dark stare and nobody dares to approach her bc they know they'll die if they try to hurt his navigator. he'd never admit it out loud, tho, but he cares for her an insane amount. and she loves him too. thinking about them cuddling when it's too cold and zoro's just the perfect pillow!! zoro braiding nami's hair!!! nami helping him clean his swords!! they look after the other all the time,, and they are the ones that know luffy the best, of course they're going to be the first ones to talk things out together if something's wrong with him. also, my zolu shipper heart needs to say that nami would be the first one to find out about them. in every universe. i love them.

[lighthousegod]

Hello and welcome to my rant from my time on Stranger Things Steddie and Friends Twitter for the past few months.

K I'm really pissed but its fine I wrote this all before the poll thing. Now I just. Can't get rid of it. (Me at tumblr headquarters right fucking now)

Anyway. Sorry for the interruption.

The fact that I've seen several ST fans claim most people who like steddie are fetishizing them is already shitty, but what makes it even more shitty is that they focus on them being two white cis guys fetishized by "white girls".

To reference the two white cis guys first, yeah, you got me there. That really is all those two are in the show. And if you wanna talk representation, well shit! Let's do it! Out of the main cast, we have 3 people of color: Lucas, Erica, and Argyle. Lucas is much too young to be in a relationship with either of them and already has one of his own, and Erica is ten years old. Now, I love Argyle, but he was written to be a comic relief character that had no arc and never met either of them. I think that's a wasted opportunity, Eduardo is great and would've done well as a fully fleshed out character, and there is a conversation to be had about whether that character would've been received the same way Eddie was being a white guy. But the thing is, he was never even CAST as a character who could be compared with Eddie- again, his whole character was "funny stoner." THAT is fucked, and people have definitely decided to ignore that fanon. In fact, Jargyle has become a pretty well known ship! Weirdly enough, the content I've seen of them has majorly been from people who also ship steddie! It isn't as popular as Steddie, though, and I don't think that's ONLY bc of half of the ship has less lore than eddie. There definitely is at least some internal bias us white queer folks should take into account when considering what ships we focus on in media.

However, I don't think that's why it's being brought up. I don't think I read tweets from lesbians with she/her in their bios condemning all us steddie ppl who just ship it because "they're two white guys we can fetishize for being in an mlm relationship" bc they're trying to be good allies. That COMPLETELY disregards that transmasc and nonbinary people (ESPECIALLY transmasc people of color) make a BIG chunk of the steddie fandom. Crazy, it's almost like Eddie was written to represent an outcast and literally GOT TARGETED BY CHRISTIANS and a bunch of people in marginalized communities related to his struggles! Except oh, yeah, that'd exactly what happened. And yeah, okay, he's a white guy and it IS pretty shitty that they cast a white dude to represent outcasts in general, but the people talking shit are watching the SAME DAMN SHOW that has a huge fucking cast and still has minimal representation. Fuck, man, Caleb McLaughlin has faced SO MUCH hate from assholes "fans" as the only black main character. Why the hell are people using that very real issue to back their shitty arguments against a gay ship on twitter?

Again, I wanna preface that 90% of these kinds of comments come from lesbians and bisexual people with she/her or she/they in the bio. I thought yall were COOL with the gay and trans people. Yall ARE queer people. Some of them were even big Ronance or Rovickie fans! YALL. WHY IS FRIENDLY FIRE ON??

A lot of this argument is backed by claims that steddie fans ignore canon queer rep, too, and I just don't understand that.

I know. Robin is representation. I am SO HAPPY to have her, and I'm so happy that Maya pushed for it, and as a transmasc person who was not out at the time and likes girls, I felt very seen when watching her coming out scene with Steve. However, I know I don't fully understand the lesbian experience as someone who likes guys too. I know Robin means a lot to wlw fans, especially lesbians. There have been instances where steddies have co-opted that scene to make it about steddie, and that is not okay. (I've never SEEN this happen, but I've seen people talk about it. All the steddie guys on Twitter that I follow were making it pretty clear that that was not cool and pretty fuckin lesbiphobic. I agree, whoever did that, fuck them. Wlw and specifically lesbian wlw relationships have very little rep and Netflix canceled all their shows and it's super fucked.) But besides this, I actually see a LOT of steddie fans who very much love Robin's character. Most of the steddie artists and fic writers I know are also ronance, rovickie, and/or Buckingham creators. A lot of them are wlw themselves!

//I should also note that Will is canonically gay now and I'm super excited, but truly, I just don't see as much appeal in byler because they're so much younger than me now. I totally love Will as a character, and I was around the kids' ages when the first season came out, but I'm in college now. I relate a lot more to the older kids! I'm real happy to have will as mlm rep and I hope he gets his moment in s5. I just didn't latch onto him and Mike the way I did Steve and Eddie! We all got preferences and that's fine.//

All this to say, I'm just so tired of Twitter, man. I just saw a post about how many cis women who claiming its "ableism" to say they have to be around anyone who identifies as masculine, including queer men, queer mascs, cis men of color, butch lesbians, etc. And I've seen a lot of that lately too. It's just so weird to see someone who identifies as a queer woman talk shit abt a steddie fan with a hellcheer shipper.

(man I can't even get into that rn. Chrissy and Eddie shippers in ST fandom are a whole other bout of drama. I've seen steddies be pretty nasty on the issue toward bi women who ship that bc of age difference, which I never really understood because eddie has no confirmed age?? Like idk how he can be a super senior AND 17 on his missing poster but whatever, I'm not stressing abt that as long as you dont make them have a weird age gap on purpose. Hell, I even thought they were love interests at first, too. But DAMN I've seen some hellcheer people that hate steddie. None of this justification type shit either, they just say "it doesn't make sense" and "I'm scared of steddie" and "they ruined the fandom and eddies character" like bro that's literally homophobia. like oogily boogily gay people jumpscare homophobia. So I just don't talk to those guys usually.)

Whatever abt the straight ppl tho they're never gonna get my weird gay stuff. But what SUCKS is when it's other gay people saying this stuff. Like what about mlm wlw solidarity man? Why do I gotta see a rovickie stan and a hellcheer girl talking abt how steddie shippers are all misogynistic and hate women?? Esp when so many are transmasc?? It's getting weird and TERF-y and I just. I wish we were cool again. ST is abt outcasts at the end of the day, it's why we root for them and relate to them. There aren't even a lot of queer people from the 80s around because of the kinda hatred people like us face. Not to mention racism, ableism, misogyny, all of it. For centuries. The people up top all hate us. We gotta have each other's backs and twitter is making us INSANE instead. God.

Anyway I'm gonna go watch the mandalorian now later losers.

[emoyuuta]

can you give some manga/anime recs??

hello, sorry to answer a bit late. I don't know about your tastes (I basically mostly read and watch shojo/josei and sometimes shonen/seinen), but here are some recs.

Manga recs:

Akane Banashi. it's such a nice story, with great characters too!!! It feels like a spokon but with a traditional art instead of sports!!! And it's all due to the main character's very competitive personality. It's truly one of my favourite series rn.

Recently i have started Don't call it mystery and i'm enjoying it so far (i still have to start the third volume tho). It's about a young guy solving peculiar mysteries.

House of five leaves. A very compelling historical manga about a group of criminals.

The apothecary diaries. I've been reading both the manga and the light novels and i'm enjoying it so much that i'm not even talking about it in here because i want to finish it without spoilers lmao.

Anime recs:

Bocchi the rock. It was one of my favourite anime last year (and i'm gonna start reading the manga soon), it's very funny and hella relatable. Also it literally rocks.

The Fire Hunter. It's a fantasy anime (i think it's an original one?), i watched it last year but i heard they're already planning a second season. it has a very fascinating setting and the main characters' stories are also very interesting.

Those snow white notes. I followed this anime a few years ago and i am not joking when i say it was like entering another dimension for 25 minutes per week. Also banger music!!! (kinda sad that there's nowhere to read the manga nor a second season coming).

Run with the wind. It's one of my favourite series, it's a spokon, truly just pick it up and you won't regret it.

Raven of the inner palace. It's a shojo historical/fantasy series and i found it great!!!!

If you like "typical" (shojo-like) fantasy anime, I have also enjoyed I'm the villainess, so i'm taming the final boss and I'm in love with the villainess.

House of five leaves. This is a historical anime, I have already recommended the manga but i'd check out both because they have different final arcs and different endings (both enjoyable).

The Aqualope on white sand. It's a shojo (but to me, it was gay).

The Apothecary diaries. Still airing, amazing adaptation (look at what can they do when they give shojo series the attention they deserve!!).

Also I'm gonna leave some unsolicited anime movies recs bc I loved this films:

Inu Oh. Idk if there's any streaming available so far but i watched it a few months ago and it's such a banger trust me this one can only be described with "slay".

The case of hana and alice. It's a very funny slice of life movie, 100% recommended.

On Gaku: our sound. It's another slice of life movie that captures perfectly the feeling of being promising yet cringe in your teens.

Okay I am done now. Again, I don't know if these recs suit your tastes but I hope you'll enjoy them!

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

Hi, I don't want to be rude, I'm just trying to learn and don't know who else to ask about this sort of thing:

I've recently started learning a little bit about asexuality, and the main thing I don't really understand is how people can really be so sure about this sort of thing (especially really young people; I've seen kids barely eleven or twelve years old calling themselves ace). I know so many people (particularly women) who never felt any sort of sexual attraction, and were sure they never would, and then they eventually did.

Including myself! Like I said, the term "asexual" isn't something I encountered until fairly recently, but there was a very long stretch of time (read: all of middle school and all of high school and even the first year or two of college) where, if I'd known the words, I'd probably have considered myself ace, or at least demi. I was completely sex-repulsed (again, not a term I was familiar with at the time, I just thought of myself as a prude). (I liked looking at cute boys, but only in the way you look at paintings: nice to watch for a while, but I had no desire to touch or even talk to them.) Sex just sounded really gross and I didn't get the appeal in the slightest. (And whenever my friends started gushing about hot guys and their abs, I just got totally confused. How did the amount of muscle a guy had determine his attractiveness?)

(I also didn't have my first real crush until I was almost seventeen, and it was with a guy I'd literally known my entire life (who was totally off-limits for many reasons) but had only recently started hanging out with one-on-one and realized how much we had in common. It was a mess and I was an emotional wreck for months until I got over him.)

And then one day, when I was around twenty or so, I woke up and realized that sex just didn't weird me out anymore. I wasn't about to run out and have a one-night stand with the first semi-decent looking man I met, but the idea of being like that with a guy (especially one I really cared about) suddenly sounded really nice and like something to look forward to. And something I wanted sooner rather than later.

To me, it feels like a lot of it is just the backlash of our highly over-sexualized culture, where sex and romance are pushed at us (again, particularly girls) from a very young age, often in a rather shallow, unrealistic, pornographic, Hollywood-esque way, and touch in general is seen as less and less platonic (when I was in high school, I thought nothing of holding hands with my friends or leaning my head on their shoulders or even sharing a bed on a sleepover, but nowadays if you do that sort of thing with anyone but family, the assumption is that you're in some sort of non-platonic relationship).

(When I was in college, my mother saw me running my fingers through a female friend's hair and asked if there was something I wanted to tell her. I was confused at first, and when I understood what she meant I was really upset. Not because I was offended at being considered gay, but because platonic touch has always been so so important to me and the realization that from now, on it would be seen as something else hurt. (And also because I was still rather sex-repulsed and the thought of being in that sort of relationship with anyone, especially someone I thought of as practically a sister, was gross.))

We're simultaneously being told, "don't show any sort of physical affection to anyone you don't want to sleep with" and "you should have sex as often and with as many people as you possibly can." And more and more, young people are rejecting that hook-up culture mentality; and where once they would have been considered late-bloomers or old-fashioned or even pretty normal, it's now seen as them having a "problem" or being "weird." And, like every difference, it needs a clear-cut label we can use in response. ("There's nothing wrong with me, I'm just [insert group label here]." "Well, when we thought you were just a freak, we felt justified in being rude, but now that you can call us [insert aforementioned label]-phobic, we probably shouldn't do that. (And if we do, you have like-minded people who'll protest in your defense.)")

But to me, labels aren't always a good thing, and can even be dangerous at times. Once someone puts a label on themself, they often feel like they have to keep using it, even if it no longer fits. Especially if they've shared it with everyone they know, and were celebrated for it.

(Where someone like me might once have only gotten into their first relationship in their twenties and just explained it as, "oh, I'm just a late bloomer" or "I hadn't found the right person yet," they might now say to themselves that "last year I told everyone that I was aroace, so if I show up somewhere with a boyfriend, I'll either be made fun of or accused of lying. And even if they don't, I'm going to feel really stupid about that coming out party they threw for me. I may as well keep using this label even it doesn't accurately reflect how I feel.")

I guess what I'm trying to ask is what makes people, especially young people, (and particularly young women, who generally have a lower sex drive than boys of the same age) so sure that they can't feel sexual and/or romantic attraction, and aren't just "late bloomers" like myself? And what is the difference between the two?

(Sorry this ended up being so long, I guess I had more thoughts on the subject than I thought. Again, I really am not trying to be rude or accuse anyone of anything, I genuinely want to educate myself and understand more.)

Hoo boy this IS a long one, so I’m gonna have to do it in pieces, I think.

Probably gonna either reblog multiple times or start separate posts using this as a prompt list of sorts and then link them back to this one.

*stretches

ok, let’s begin here

“particularly women.”

Yes, it is very likely that there are more ace spec women than men. (Or afabs vs. amabs or lower testosterone people vs. higher testosterone people if we’re gonna go on that tangent.)

This is just basically true at face value, when talking bell curve distributions. No need to comment on it further.

(unless you want me to start in on a feminist rant about how the same way we as a society tend to linguistically use ‘he’ as the default pronoun, we, especially in media, also use male-coded attraction experiences as the “norm.”)

“there was a very long stretch of time”

Yes. That’s gray ace. Experiencing attraction very infrequently.

The thing that I see people struggling with with these 2 concepts is, “but what if demisexuality or graysexuality is normal for many women?” What if it is? That’s fine and cool and isn’t it great in this modern age we now have language to express and describe female-coded experiences instead of living with unspoken and unconscious norms and feeling broken and in some cases being literally over-medicalized by doctors when male partners don’t get their “needs” met [BIG emphasis on those scare quotes]

“I was completely sex-repulsed (again, not a term I was familiar with at the time, I just thought of myself as a prude).”

People grow and change in their sexuality. Bi folks preferences and leanings may change over time with their body changing. Some die-hard lesbians end up falling for men. Sexuality is fluid and malleable. This does not invalidate sexuality or your relationship to it at any given point in time in your life.

As long as we keep in mind as a culture that you are allowed to grow and change in your sexuality, there is no problem with using a set of labels, because you have the understanding that you can always change them later. Anybody who’s not on board with that and gives themselves or others grief over it has some growing up to do of their own.

Minors have sex with each other, or have interest in doing so, and if you felt Othered by that, then you did. There’s no changing that lived experience or whatever the biological differences are that underpin it. We can only become more accepting to fix the first. The second is immutable.

Let me repeat for emphasis.

Sexuality is fluid and malleable. This does not invalidate sexuality or your relationship to it at any given point in time in your life. Yes this includes childhood. Some people experience their first period as early as 6 years old.

They are the statistical outliers at that stage in life, but you, or at least people like you, are the outlier when it comes to other 15 year olds. Some of whom have been masturbating avidly since they were 11. Many try really hard to studiously ignore the fact that kids/teens have a sexuality, and that results not only in a whole lot of internalized shame, nearly a decade worth of it, but also forced confusion (might be termed collective gaslighting?) like this over whether a 15 year old can ‘really’ tell if they are different from their peers.

“(And whenever my friends started gushing about hot guys and their abs, I just got totally confused. How did the amount of muscle a guy had determine his attractiveness?)”

Exactly.

Didn’t even get to reading this part yet and I had already covered being Othered.

Whether it was malicious or passive doesn’t matter.

pansexuals and demisexuals and sapiosexuals would all feel Othered in these situations.

So let’s start validating those lived experiences rather than constantly putting them down by questioning them.

To Be Continued >>

[laylawatermelon]

So I just wanted to vent about this because I don't know why I'm so upset.

(very long post ahead read at your own risk) ps heavy topics implied/vaguely referenced (racism, school s-, outing, etc)

Watching Heartstopper for the first time when it first came out was kind of hard for me. For the first time in my life after about 18 or so years of living in an ultra religious dangerously othering country that quite literally promises (very bad things let's say) about queer people and others in general really I had given myself permission to just enjoy.

To not do the cringe and gag as I was taught in TV and in the church, to not roll my eyes and be hateful. To not dismiss an experience I don't understand.

To not let religion rule my every being and stop me from loving and receiving love and it is. Just love. No labels or anything. It was a romance show.

I had only (very scared may I add) watched one other queer media and every time I had watched one it felt like some omnipotent presence (the church or worse my ironically bigoted dad who happens to be black btw) to burst in and yell

HEY! THAT'S GAY!

(it's funny but not at the same time)

For the first time I allowed it to be on the big screen, my tv screen (as god intended) and allowed myself to see love.

I have been working out my identity since graduating high school and am still working the kinks out. I realized even when I was in the midst of hate I ironically had multiple queer couples (lesbians mostly) in my books. Hell my first book that made me decide to be an author has a grumpy and sunshine couple and I was like yep seems right.

I never thought it was wrong but when I'd leave the comfort of my imagination and my world I realized that there was the world burning around me.

I'd seen queer couples in high school and said that made sense, and in college I was hilariously practically adopted by them for a short while in college (what can I say birds of a feather am I right?).

It's finally been to unpack years of assumptions and hate and I'd cried a lot. There were so many parallels and intertwinement of the struggles of black people and queer people, and black queer people.

I cried feeling helpless growing up seeing school marches of kids begging to be helped by the ones who swore to protect them, I cried growing up seeing news of young men being another static and not another valuable life and then I cried when I finally saw the brokenness in ignoring queer voices.

I cried for myself for feeling like I had to do something, for not being permitted to love who I want, think how I want and develop how I want.

And most of all right now I cry for the feeling of helplessness I feel sometimes.

I feel dramatic when I say I felt empty when I saw what Kit had posted on Twitter. I felt the same way when I watched Mismatched when the female character was outed in an angry rant.

I knew what that meant. I knew what it felt like.

I feels like being bare and prostrated and having yourself held up to a blinding light. To be subjugated to an impossible and immovable standard that the "norm" never have to worry about.

Alice had stated everyone was queer so I also assumed that that's what he probably was. I also think I heard myself in him when he said partner doesn't matter and it's not a big deal.

I say that everytime I talk to my mom or my family.

I want to have a partner that understands me (the subtext is always in bright red PROBABLY NOT STRAIGHT MOM). She now says she just wants me to be happy. 😊

So I accepted it.

I thought everyone did.

I didn't understand why just because he was seen filming or dating a girl (I don't quite remember) meant he had to be faking it. Newsflash he's an actor first of all.

When straight actors have crossdressed and made fun of queer people or even portrayed them in the however long of stardom they never get the same treatment. They get the how brave, how amazing. WOW! He'll even kiss a guy/sarcastic

I was just so hurt and upset. Then all of a sudden there was discourse and I just hated every minute of it.

I've recently been kind of breaking myself away from the celebrity ideal of being turned real life idols/gods to worship that are practically stalked and gawked at. I hate everything about celebrity culture.

Paparazzi=stalker. If it happened to a normal person they'd be in jail. Or at least on a watchlist and shamed probably.

But they've turned people and their lives into the commodity to the public. They've ripped apart the mental health and lives of so many and then go quiet when they break.

It was so unfair.

I feel like it was so unfair.

And I can't help but cry because I know what it feels like to be scared. Everyone probably has at one time.

I have empathy (probably too much honestly) so I tear up when people are hurting.

And I can't help but hurt for him. I can't help but hurt for everyone I see struggling.

I wish the world was better and people were too. I just wish it was all better.

But for Kit in my mind I feel like I probably shouldn't ever meet him because I'll be a sobbing mess so I'll just write this to get it out of my system.

I see you.

I'm sorry it happened like that.

I feel you.

I'm sorry you felt like that.

I'm sorry you had to feel like that. You were young and scared and it felt like the world was surrounding you.

Something so beautiful and private was taken from you. I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry.

I just wish he could hear it.

He also deserves a hug. A very big and warm one.

I'm still crying every time they talk about it in season 2 and it just made me sob every time they practically said it's okay tell us in your own time.

I tell that to myself in private every time I question myself about anything.

I'm so sad such a beautiful thing was taken away. And honestly my brain says he might've come out in a very cheeky way using a line from the show or in a very natural way, or even not at all.

We don't owe each other access to every part of ourselves like the Internet has conditioned is to believe.

Celebrities and us "normal people" alike. We all deserve to love and be loved.

No matter the gender, color, size, identity or anything really.

We're literally the only species that can communicate with each other and all this other weird stuff is quite literally all made up to complicate stuff.

We should love and be happy but I know that's a very idealistic way of thinking.

If you see this Kit (and everyone one else ofc) you are loved no matter where you are from, what you identify as or who you love you are valid and worthy.

You are loved even if you don't love yourself - Cleo Sol

The universe loves you and you were put here for a reason and I am quite frankly glad you are here.

Thank you for reading all this if you have I don't feel comfortable talking about stuff like this in my current circumstances but I want to advocate more.

So here, advocacy.

Love who want! Be queer and loud! Muah

[falsebooles123]

Car Trouble and a Full Scredule - Diary of a Big Ole Gay - 3/26/23

Hey Whores, I'm back after what feels like a ridicolous long week.

Let Me get into it. Monday morning my second kitchen job cuts my hours because they got a new guy. He seems pretty Chill, Then both the business meetings and date I had planned on monday got reschreduled for the middle of the week. My car has been acting up so I had to deal with the stress of driving a ticking time bomb that I don't know whats wrong with it to work because I need the money. and my scredule changed again friday like a couple hours before work. That was when I set up my second checking and spent a bunch of money because my bills had already came out. It was like 40 bucks but y'know what I deserved to treat myself. Also this was the weekend so not only did we have a shitshow of a friday prime rib night dinner but I also got to finally do a dinner service on the line. The fact that they have a bonified dishwasher now instead of just recreating that thing were your mom passive-aggresively bitches about the dishes because no one else will wash them.

(I'm the mom in this context, also this was the only gif I could find that didn't give people seizures or was literally porn.)

so I had a lot going on. I also watched a bunch of TV and did manage to catch a few films since the last week we did this.

Caged! (1950) dir. John Cromwell

Some people have called this this the Godmother of the Women in Prison movies and you wouldn't be remised to notice its DNA in later films and shows like Orange is the New Black.

I talked about it in a lot more depth on Letterboxd so I'll try my best to summerize.

First the movie is about a young ingenue named marie who is sent to an all-women prison on trumped up charges, the film makes a point to discuss the cruelity from the prison guards, including the trunchbullian Matron Harper, the lack of resources for the prisoners, and how oftentimes this type of uncivil atmosphere and lack of real resources to reintergrate them into society cause most of these women to return or in marie's case enter into a life of crime.

Luckily we have fixed all these issues in the prison system and thats totally not the same issues we have today /s

As I have said this is the Proto-Woman in Prison film, perhaps the ur-WIP movie and thus the question is raised.

What About The Lesbians!!!!????

So first I will say that this film is not textually queer, Marie is not eating kitty the second she gets into lockup but the film I will say has a queer sensibility.

I'm just going to quote my Letterboxd Review.

"and the answer is probably. I've haven't read the book that this is based on so I can't tell you if Kellog talked about it but this is a womens prison honey we can guess. We have to remember that this is in the middle of the haes code and so you couldn't have a character just be like, "hi, I like women". That being said there are a few choice lines that hint at that kind of thing. Kitty mentions that after awhile "You don't even think about men, you just fall out of the habit", a newspaper discusses prison immorrality, which probably is reffering to like gambling and smoking cigerettes but might hint at a more siturational inversion so to speak. 

Outside of these supposed oblique references there is the culteral queerness of it. The aestetic aspect of queer coding. First there is obviosly a lot of butchness about this film. we have just a fuckton of these butch tops in this film from Kitty(Betty Garde), Elvira (Lee Patrick) to the trunchbullian Everlyn Harper (Hope Emerson), to even the prison warden Benton (Agnes Moorehead). they all have this kind of dominant aggression to them. This masculinization. 

And this trope continues, Marie has her head shaved at a crucial part of the film and there is the repeated motif of the women doing rollcall were they have to speak there last names first, Marie Allen, now being called ALLEN, marie. Its literally patronymic. 

On one hand we can absoulutely interpret this trope as a comment on how prison dehumanized women, talking away there individality especially there vanity. The social way that they are able to express themselves. And this is emphasized a lot actually, the gift of lipstick at christmas, the head shaving, the fact that Marie asks for a brush during her mugshot and the guard quips back, "why theres no men here".

And I think its important to recognize that this type of dehumanization is different from mens prisons because our sense of vanity is different. A man can affirm his gender by getting jacked in prison but a women can't affirm herself along traditional feminity the system is designed in a certain way to masculinize that experience. In some small sense the very notion of a womans prison is a queer space outside of its constuct as a gynocentric space. 

(note: prison cosmetology is absolutely a thing and women perform a lot of amazing feats of ingenuity, from like tattoing on eyebrows to making makeup out of magazine ink and deoderant but note that these are ways of subverting a system not a byproduct of that system)

Even if we except the trope of a womans prison as a non-normative gendered space its also important to notice that one of the main conflicts in this film is not just between trunchbully Harper and her cruality against Marie, but also between the power struggle of "Corrupting" Marie by the hands of Evelyn and Kitty, who both want her to join there crime syndicate. Marie at one points says "If I said No to Kitty why would I say yes to you". Both of these characters are maternal in a sense but they also take on a very lesbian coding. Evelyn makes a point to gift the women feminine products for christmas, (makeup and a handmirror). In a straight lens its another commentary on femeninity and Evelyns power in the system through a queer lens its almost courtship. This is the type of thing you could buy your girlfriend as a present. In some ways A Life of Crime and Criminal Gayness are symbolic analogs to each other"

Honestly if you were a fan of Orange is the New Black or just like Butch Crime Donnas then this is a pretty good time. Another one of those "This is honestly not that gay but it was an absolute iconic piece of cinema so thank you" movies.

Tea and Sympathy (1956) dir Vincente Minnelli

This was one of those films that took me like a week to watch.

So I've quoted vito russo like 15 times at this point so let me just summerize the vibe. Basically theres a guy in this movie whose a sissy, he dances, he's in theater, he even sews. Wow, what a faggot. and none of the other boys want him to play in their raindeer games because he threatens there fragile masculinity. What I'm saying is that the first half of this TWO HOUR FILM, is just him being bullied for being a sissy.

I'm also saying this shit was highly triggering as both a cocksucker and a limp-wrist soyboy.

(oh god I just had a truamatic flashback were a church mom and her daughter were mocking me for being a limp-wrist faggot and I didn't understand why they asked me to do the limp wrist gesture. and so i'm just puzzled at this random gesture they wanted me to reinnact while my father is just visable angry sitting besides me. Honestly first fuck them and also my dad might be a homophobic asshole but at least he had the decency to never call me a slur.)

so childhood truama and complicated relationship with my father aside after we get through the very long and insuffrable queer misery porn we get to the actually fun part of the movie where there are HORNY MILFS. HORNY MILFS IN YOUR AREA.

THESE WOMAN WANT TO FUCK! NO CREDIT CARDS! HOOKUPS ONLY! CLICK NOW!!!!

yeah basically this movie is two hours of this guy making moves on his landlords wife while the guy is out hanging out with a bunch of twinks.

as I said in my extremly long write-up on the topic. T&S is absolutely a good film in showcasing what this type of homophobia and toxic masculinity is like and it was controversal for a reason but I also want to recognize that as a queer person this shit was hard to sit through.

so for a bit of fun yet another LB quote.

Because this shit is true to life. It feels very reminescent of my own experiences with homophobia. The kind that is more subtle and exclusionary and so while this is a objectively subversive and provokative film. I'm still going to relegate it to "Things I'm making Straight People watch during pride month while I leave the room". Its a double feature with brokeback mountain. Whats that.... thats four hours of Queer Misery Porn. Well too damn bad. Maybe if you stopped sharing those proto-terf facebook memes we could have watched Cruising or Rocky Horror. Sit Down, Shut Up, and relive my childhood trauma and daddy issues straiggot.

The Strange One (1957) dir. Jack Garfein

One of the weirdest episodes of Haze Him I've ever seen.

Jokes aside The Strange One is basically this drama set at a military academy. Person with a real name. Jocko De Paris, (I'm not making that up), is basically one of those rich assholes who is also criminal insane. He manipulates a group of other cadets into getting a guy expelled for being drunk.

Why did he do this. Well if you believe morissey (yes that Morissey), its because Paris is a little bit of a closet queen.

This film is weirdly homoerotic for no discernable reason. The queerness of the characters have nothing to do with it the director was like I'm going to make a movie with deep ideas about the nature of evil and tyranny and also everyones going to kind want to suck dick.

Another one of those films thats honestly kinda slow but I still think about the visuals.

Everything Else I Watched This Week

oof ok I finished Re: Mind, loved it messy moe drama made no goddamn sense would watch again.

Tried to watch Circus of Fear which is a Rialto Crime Movie but not one of the Krimi Films. Also Really Boring.

Also binged the second season of carole and tuesday. I loved it, the shows not perfect but I had so much fun with it.

I also saw Free Guy which.... was fun. I'm sorry but not every blockbuster is going to be worth adding to the Falseboolesey Hall of Fame. Also its like a second-rate Lego Movie which is without any irony. A modern Classic.

(this is non-negotiable. The lego movie is a deep introspection on the apollian vs dionysian drives, an exploration of childhood and adult perspectives and are fear of the joy of choas. It also may literally be cladestine Agritprop)

I also tried to have a Falsebooles123 Kinema movie night. I watched Grandma's Boy which people mention a lot as the prime example of like the sissy trope but honestly I don't remember anything about the film. I kinda just blanked out.

anyway whores. I have an entire week off starting tomorrow so its going to be a lot of editing, yard work, and doing some prep stuff for april which will be so busy. I'm excited through. I'm also very close to watching all the films I could find in the internet archive so theres that. woot woot.

[incorrectinfinity]

Ok I am gonna talk about the things I like in this post because it's fresh in my mind and most of these things will be spoilers! Also this could be long.

First of all hi pjo mutuals!!! Idk if any of you are reading this but I really am thankful so many of you decided to stick around despite the Cookie Run hell of it all.

It's been like two years now and even if we haven't talked much in that time, you guys mean a lot to me <3

ANYWAYS THE SUN AND THE STAR!!!!

This book has been on my mind since it was hinted at at the end of TOA, so it's been a sec. The idea of this book actually helped me quite a bit when I wasn't doing very well mentally, which is very sad!

Ok, first thing's first.

Ok my soul can be put to rest now.

Second of all, my statement still stands:

For the most part the queer representation is pretty damn good this time around!

Epiales and Menoetes immediately getting defensive was a bit jarring and a little bit worrying to me but thankfully their bursts of anger about it last like five seconds each.

I'm really glad they say the words gay and queer naturally and not like they're some forbidden line to be crossed in a novel for young teens/late tweens. It genuinely made me smile.

Persephone even bringing up the notion of aromantic people almost made me lose my shit!! I am aromantic!!! That's me!!!! Just like me fr!!!!! But seriously I kinda feel forgotten a lot in queer media and literally any mention of aromanticism makes me smile, it was a very nice thing to see.

That's barely even mentioning the queer characters!

Nico bluntly saying he's gay is so fucking satisfying to see now, it's so nice to see him so comfortable with who he is.

Will canonically being bisexual is really nice to see, I could feel the writers' sigh of relief as they put the discourse to rest.

SPEAKING OF DISCOURSE... Piper MyQueen! It's nice to see a questioning character because I haven't really seen one represented before! She's still figuring herself out after the months following the end of toa and it's nice to see the message that it takes time to figure yourself out being shown because it's a surprisingly rare one to see. I appreciate how she also gravitates towards the queer label :)

Now minor characters:

Epiales: I appreciate them because of how ridiculous their existence is

Hiss-majesty: iconic and also that name makes me confused

Menoetes: my beloved

Geryon: Ok that's just hilarious I cannot deny that

Thirdly....

BIANCA DI ANGELO MY BELOVED MY ULTIMATE FAVE I MISSED YOU HOLY SHIT.

Besides uh....

That. I have LOVED seeing how Bianca and Maria have affected Nico over the years! It's so tragic and amazing and YES.

Seeing Bianca one last time and Maria for the first time ever was so so so satisfying even if they didn't say much. I almost teared up a bit. A lot. I got emotional.

Nyx using them against Nico was SO fucked up and I love it

Speaking of... Nyx.

Design.

Design.

Very cool, moving on.

Hades and Persephone's growth was so unexpected I am just gonna be real.

Hades was going to happen naturally because of what we say in HoO but him caring enough to send Nico a prophecy? And bring back Maria and Bianca? That's so sweet! I love that! I love that SO much! And also he isn't completely not an asshole which is appreciated.

Persephone is my favorite one of Riordan's interpretations of the gods.

I never thought I would say that sentence ever in my life. She's so caring and sweet for the 10 minutes we see her and I really appreciate her growth and seeing how she's finally getting over her grudge. It was unexpected and completely welcome.

Also I appreciate clarifying that Hades and Persephone's relationship is a good one from Persephone herself.

Also Nemesis is a badass and I did not realize how much I missed her! She has no reason so be so cool and yet she still is.

Gorgyra's chapters were all wonderful, I love her SO much and I hope Bob visits her sometime.

Speaking of which: Bob and Small Bob are amazing as always.

I appreciate the theme of change around Bob's character, he's different from how I remember him being is HoH but that's probably more natural than Nico's change in character (which I don't mind as much as most people I've seen but is still jarring) because of him and Iapetus switching every two seconds for over a year so yeah.

Small Bob is Small Bob. Cat. Gato. Wonderful.

Will actually having more of a character was nice to see too! Also his ultimate magic hidden deep within being hayfever is very funny to me.

Actually talking about the trauma these characters have been through and addressing it is also very satisfying.

Overall I think it was a good send off to these kids who have been through too damn much. I will have a post airing my criticisms probably but I really did like this lovable train wreck of a book, me from two years ago would be very pleased.

Can't wait for the road trip book where both Percy and Annabeth come out as bisexual simultaneously and for this series to be OVER!!!

[chaosandstardust]

i did not care for taylor swift, her brand, music, life or anything, or even like any of it really, until i found out the rumors and analyses. because her songs were always so boy crazy and gave me an ick which was not relatable for me, like, girl, you're older than me and even i have more life than you, how?! grow up?! you're a millionaire stop being so obsessed with the random boys you date for three months and then break up, it's not that serious, especially not EVERY time.

i will say the queer analyses of her songs make them SO much more meaningful to the point where i actually started to listen to her. for example, to my ear, it makes so much more sense to listen to how you get the girl for instance, and understand that as a guide she wrote for herself, because she's the one that messed up and wants whoever that other person is back, instead of being desperate to get a guy back but having to play weird dating games before she can allow him to come back. and learning how over the top taylor tends to be about a lot of things, yes it makes perfect sense to me that she's the one that would be standing at the door explaining herself IN THE FREAKIN RAIN to be overdramatic and true lol. i bet she even had the boombox to truly make it a movie moment.

jasdklfjadslkjfkldsjaf;kl WHAT? Like you're allowed to have your own readings but what? lmao. have you spoken to straight women who date men? Have you watched romance movies? They're full of overdramatic, often hetero romance, and women eat it up (as they should). Do you actually think How To Get the Girl literally happened, lol? do you think her music is 1 for 1 representation of who she is as a person? What a weird song to choose???? i mean i agree that it's overdramatic but I think it's meant to be?

and

"girl, you're older than me and even i have more life than you, how?! grow up?! you're a millionaire stop being so obsessed with the random boys you date for three months and then break up, it's not that serious, especially not EVERY time."

Taylor was SIXTEEN when she released her first album. SIXTEEN. That is prime time for over dramatics and boy craziness, and that's the reason women and girls related to her. She wrote about how she was feeling as a young woman dating throughout her twenties, and as a person who has been listening to her since literally her first album, she's been pretty on the mark the whole time. The last time she wrote explicitly about breakups in her album was when Red came out, and she was 20 - 22 writing that. So yeah, she was DRAMATIC. You would not be able to handle me now much less me at 21 if you think that that was overdramatic. 😂

Art is meant to be overdramatic and full of feelings. MINE is! I'm literally 25, and I feel things so hard still and I've been heartbroken many times. The best art is made by people who are fully present in their own feelings. Men write all the time about their short-term relationships and one-night stands, and they've NEVER gotten this level of vitriol. And you had to decide that she was GAY before taking her seriously as an artist?

I say this as a queer woman myself: if the only way you can enjoy art is if you relate to your own very specific experiences onto the artist, that's a YOU problem. If she has to be singing about women for you to respect her, what the fuck? I can enjoy her music but I'm very aware that she is probably not singing about women.

Taylor is singing about men, you're just gonna have to cope. If you want to apply your own sapphic readings onto the material, it's about your readings, not the artist themselves. Once you start to apply your own personal feelings to the material, it's separating the art from the artist, bestie.

Taylor talking about "easter eggs" has very little to do with her personal life. Easter eggs are about her work, like using colours to signify an album release or putting a title in a music video. Christ. Listen to some actual sapphic artists, I beg you or go out and say this to a normal person, I beg.

[gogyposting]

Agreed with you on the post; I lean towards 'it's all just business babeey' conclusion, and that while they are qbaiting in a sense of using their flirting relationship to drive up the engagement (and therefore profits too), if people are stupid enough to believe it's actually ~real~ and that they have queer rep in DnG or whatever - it's their own fault. Ship to your heart's content but if you become delusional and start dnf truthing on main - I'm not even sorry for you.

Thing is, for whatever reason two guys flirting will always attract new (often young, often queer and often female) audience, even if that initial flirting was just friendly banter and not intended to be bait at all. I don't want CCs to change their behaviour intentionally to avoid that audience, you know? Especially since explicitly saying they're not together changes...pretty much nothing tbh. If Dream or George announced tomorrow that no, they're not together, calm down gays - at best fandom would be like "ya-ya we know", at worst - "omg they're so closeted and afraid of being found out :(". So at this point they might as well ramp it up intentionally and benefit from the whole situation.

Mildly off topic, but what does piss me off is that dnf truthing will literally be based on a.) obvious bait b.) normal behaviour between two friends that was cherry-picked to make it seem like 'dnf are so in love!1!". E.g. the 10 hour calls that they've done to our knowledge, like, 3 times? And that George had with Bad and Sapnap as well so it's not like some Dream-exclusive thing? Fandom ran with it and now whenever Dream and George are not on streams I'll see multiple posts about how "It's all good guys, they are probably on call with each other! They can't stay apart for too long uwu". This is what I mean when I say that DnG don't even need to bait, fandom will bait itself using the flimsiest arguments. Mildly frustrating but what can you do.

idk what to say to any of this really, it’s worded perfectly and i agree with all of it. especially you’re last point like?!? i’ve never been a dnfer but taking a step away from these ccs has given me a fresh perspective and i really think that so many clips that i see on my dash or tl are either obvious bait or just. Guys Bein Dudes. friends bein pals.

it’s one thing to find their relationship cute and to speculate like, for funsies. because that is not something i see any problem with and the vast majority of the people i follow on tumblr seem to fall into this category. a lot of people (young fans on twitter, mostly) just take everything wayyy too fucking seriously and i guess i don’t really have an issue with that either, i just think they might be setting themselves up for disappointment or have an unhealthy attachment to their ship. like, people accuse me of treating dng like fictional characters when i say they queerbait, but then turn around and meticulously analyze george blinking faster when dream starts talking or something as Definitive Proof that they are in love. or they over exaggerate this jealous dream bit which by the way, annoys me to no end. 

i’m not gonna lie though and pretend like they are just two normal buddies cause. i have eyes. there are some....questionable things that these two say/do that are not indicative of normal bro behavior. i side eye them HARD quite often. and i don’t want to be the fun police here, i hope that anyone who reads this doesn’t think i look down on people for shipping dnf? i don’t. i just think it’s kind of weird when people take it so seriously and invest in their dynamic wayyyyy too much. because, yknow, (looks at smudged writing on hand) Pair of social relationships and all that

[zevzevarainai]

Hey! You ever end up doing essay on the kazumaji gifs? (I'm highly interested because it's always majima o' clock where I live)

it’s always majima o’clock here too; maybe we live in the same area... but lmao i didnt write the essay on my kazumaji gifs because i didnt think anyone would want to hear it so i meant it more as a per request kind of deal. and you’re requesting. I want you to know you did this to yourself, my friend

below the read more for everyone’s well being. welcome to my first official majima analysis essay

ok so in those tags i said something like majima is softest with kiryu because it is absolutely the truth (unless you count makoto, which i love them too, but majima has moved on or at least is making an effort to. and that was pre-tacky snake skin jacket and pre-mad dog persona.) 

the prompt for the gifset was “maybe something about majima being stupid and unhinged but like, in a sweet way” and the whole point of this rambling is that kiryu is really the only one we see who causes the mad-dog persona to slip. kiryu says he can never get a read on majima but just because he is unpredictable doesn’t mean he doesn’t understand that he isn’t just batshit crazy. he trusts majima, and finds comfort in his lack of predictability, keeping kiryu’s life exciting and providing distraction from the insane amount of tragic shit that happens to kiryu. and majima has a similar experience of idolizing the yakuza lifestyle as teens/young adults only to have the yakuza drag them through hell. But this is supposed to be about Majima.

ANYWAY what GETS ME is again that mad-dog vibe slipping around kiryu. the only time we really only see it again is with Saejima when he comes back from jail. i’m gonna talk about that later too. LET’s GET TO THE GIFS i’m going in chronological order not the order i put them in

1)

Ok so as an audience, we don’t really know what happened between Kiryu and Majima between Yakuza Zero and Yakuza/Yakuza Kiwami. Yes, we get that tiny ending scene of Majima going KIRYU-CHAN for the first time and Kiryu smiling at him. But we are given nothing as to how they met or why Majima started calling him Kiryu-chan. It is left completely to the audience’s interpretation. Because then it goes straight to the first scene with Majima in Yakuza/Yakuza Kiwami after Kiryu gets out of jail. It implies that they already knew each other, and arguably that they were somewhat close -- close enough for Majima to “miss him.” (What was majima doing for those 10 years, i don’t know, but he clearly wasn’t in a great place, missing both kiryu, makoto, and saejima, we ignore y5 lore in this household or make up shit to fill in the giant gaps) You could argue that Majima missing Kiryu is just Majima being “crazy haha woah” but his character is so much deeper than that, and it’s proven in this gif’s scene. Yes he is fighting Kiryu with all his men. But if you are reading this you understand that them fighting physically all the time is a secret love language. They never intend to severely hurt each other. Fighting is how they know that they have an equal, someone else who was modeled into a weapon because of the Tojo Clan.

And yes, “He belongs to me!” is an extremely gay thing to say. He doesn’t even need to say that, though. One of his men didn’t understand that he doesn’t actually want to hurt Kiryu. The guy picked up Majima’s knife and tried to actually hurt Kiryu. Majima willingly gets stabbed so Kiryu doesn’t get hurt. That’s a handful of gay subtext right there. Majima’s first scene in y1 is about how the world is a horrible, shitty place that will chew you up and spit you out if you care. Then he goes and gets stabbed. Self-sacrificially. He cares about Kiryu, even if it hurts. 

2)

This one isn’t as deep. It stems of the same concept of them fighting each other as equals. Majima explicitly says more than once that strength is the most admirable trait, Goromi says that it only matters that a man is strong. Kiryu is the only person who presents a challenge to him. He admires him. 

3)

(As a disclaimer, I know a lot of people are uncomfortable with Goromi. I’ve also seen a lot of non-binary, gender-fluid, etc. people project on Goromi and Majima, and I feel like that can only be a good thing. Obviously they deserve more and more quality representation. I think the people who dislike Goromi are valid as well, but for the sake of this argument we are going to see Goromi as the people who project on her do and I’m going to use she/her pronouns when talking about Goromi.)

Regardless on your stance on this whole little side quest, the player has the choice to go along with Goromi which creates actually a lot of subtle connecting between the two of them. Even in just talking to her, we see the mad-dog mask slip. She talks about how much she cared about the girls at Club Shine and wonders how they’re doing. Literally says “all part of my tragic-ass backstory.” And Kiryu sympathizes with it. Says he sees through the “i hated it” bullshit and sees Majima/Goromi’s true self, which is that the cabaret job was hard for Majima because he cared about the women and didn’t like using them as a source of income and knew it would be his fault if they got hurt. 

Also, Goromi says that "When I’m with a guy, it’s all about if I’m having enough fun. That’s why he’s gotta be strong.” Sound like someone we know? Someone who we are talking about in the last gif with i-just-got-the-shit-beat-out-of-me-and-it-was-awesome bliss on his face?

Anyway, the scene in the gif is near the end of the session. Kiryu is talking about how he’s been in prison for 10 years, and Goromi says that now that he’s out he should try to relax and and a little fun. Arguably, “since you’re so lonely right now, I’m gonna give ya a hand!” is most of Majima’s role in YK1. Kiryu gets out of prison. Majima wants to fight him all the time and says it’s because he’s gone soft and needs to train. Majima Everywhere presents excitement in his life when everything else is hard and shitty and traumatizing. Yes, Majima kidnapped Haruka. But there isn’t a lot of info on that. Majima says he did it so they could fight but it very likely could have been an order from the Tojo Clan or even Nishiki. Until he develops a bond with Haruka, Majima is, in a way, all he has. Nishiki is mean now. Yumi is ???. Kazama is i don’t even remember but he certainly isn’t any emotional support. He’s lonely. Majima is the only person he has from before prison, and quite possibly the only person who understands what he is going through. 

4)

YK2, Kiryu has yeeted out of Majima’s life as Kiryu does, but he’s trying to protect haruka so I’ll let it slide. And what does Majima do now that Kiryu’s not there? Leaves the Tojo Clan. Yes it’s because he doesn’t like the 5th chairman’s style and to make up for Kawamura, but the point is he’s bored. The use of “MY Kiryu-chan” is obviously written there because “haha majima he’s crazyyy” but come on. Majima left the Tojo Clan after Kiryu stepped down as the 4th chairman. Because he was bored. Because he couldn’t trust his own men. The only person he considered an equal just wasn’t there anymore and he found it difficult to adjust. (That’s YEARNING, fellas)

So yes, HIS Kiryu-chan came home, but what is home in this context? It clearly isn’t the tojo clan, so I guess it could be Kamurocho in general. But if the clan doesn’t make it home, what does make it home? Perhaps a certain triangle shaped man??

5)

Oh boy silly Majima wants to fight Kiryu again hahaha weeeeeeeee NO listen, LISTEN, he does want to fight kiryu again, because 1) the man has been bored for a year 2) FIGHTING IS THEIR LOVE LANGUAGE 3) Majima is once again surprising Kiryu in a world where nothing surprises him anymore, where kiryu expects people to be vile and only want him for gain. Every single goddamn game it’s “Kiryu plz save the Tojo Clan plz” and Kiryu NEVER gets anything in return unless you count, i don’t know, Daigo and Haruka’s safety? But Majima doesn’t give a shit about any of that. Majima is one of the only people who consistently does things for Kiryu (even if they’re presented in an abnormal way). Majima is really the only one who makes sacrifices for Kiryu. But this fight, it kicks off YK2 of “hey, i missed you but i won’t admit it because we’re manly yakuza, please let me try to make you smile.”

6)

THE kazumaji scene. Going off of Majima being the only one to make sacrifices for Kiryu, here’s a perfect example. Majima first aids the Tojo Clan which he swore to leave literally only because Kiryu asked him to. Then, here, he get beaten within an inch of his life because he promised Kiryu he would protect Kamurocho from Ryuji. Majima does not give a shit about the Tojo Clan at this point. Yes, Majima LOVEEESSSS beating people up, but he’s fatally wounded. This is not a Majima who would die for the Tojo Clan. This is a Majima willing to die for Kiryu. After warning Kiryu about being to trusting, too.

And of course, we get the Majima collapsing on the pavement and Kiryu rushing in to CRADLE him in his arms like a damn fanfic. You’ve even got the “I did it for you” which everyone knows is basically an “I love you.” Look at Majima’s face in the gif. Bless the Kiwami 2 graphics, first of all. He’s looking at Kiryu like he wants him to be the last thing he sees, like he wants him to know that he’s going out for Kiryu, that despite the fact that he’s about to cough up blood he needs Kiryu to have the information he needs to save the clan and Kamurocho. He’s telling Kiryu all this with labored breath because he promised. Kiryu “One-Expression” Kazuma is viably worried as hell, the little nod in the gif kills me because Kiryu needs him to know he’s touched and he’s so grateful. The only reason Kiryu left him was because there was danger elsewhere and he trusts Kaoru enough to take care of him. (Side note: I love Kaoru Sayama, but I still feel like she’s good enough a character on her own and doesn’t need to be a romantic interest for Kiryu. Like it was like oh... she’s Girl so she needs to fall for the Big Strong Male Protag.... If Majima was a cis girl they would have made out in this game, maybe even y1.) 

7) Speaking of sacrifices, Yakuza 3, the game where Majima literally joined the Tojo Clan again because Kiryu wanted him to protect Daigo. That’s a huge lifestyle change, Majima.

Yes, this scene is funny because Majima is riding in a Barbie-ass truck like a 15 year old driving on a learner’s permit in a downpour (yet proves he can drive stick seconds later) and thinks he hit Kiryu while he purposely hit everyone else. Look, Majima needs this ok y3 he looks like he’s been crying since kiryu left no one No One is going to hurt Kiryu now

That truck is likely stolen, he’s driving erratically as fast as he can because Kiryu is in danger, how did he even know that Kiryu was in danger is it like some kind of 6th sense... If you didn’t already know, I would take a bullet for Majima’s voice actor; his delivery of “Kiryu-chan! Where are you?!” could have just been like haha oops kiryu did i hit you ;3 but instead it’s this raw cry of genuine panic, like did his actions get kiryu hurt, Majima could not live with himself if he was the reason Kiryu got fatally hurt

8) Ok I’ve hinted at the fact that I have beef with the Hot Mess that is yakuza 5, wasn’t huge on Y4 and Y6 was fine but it was heavily based on the events of Y5. In my head I’ve got an entire fix-it fanfic in which Majima yeets out to Okinawa with Kiryu after Y3 I could write that upon request too ANYWAY here’s another sacrificial majima...

Despite not caring for Y5, THIS SCENE is RAW. Maybe he’s not super “unhinged” in this scene but it’s just so much. Majima, who Kiryu brokedown in his taxi bc he thought he got killed (because Kiryu made him stay in the tojo clan haha we’re out here crying), chooses Kiryu over Saejima. Saejima, Majima’s oath brother, Saejima. We love Saejima, Majima loves Saejima, but 25 years is a long ass time. Majima changed. Saejima changed. For awhile he had Makoto, but then Kiryu was all Majima had for a good chunk of Saejima’s time in prison. This is the man Majima got his eye stabbed out for defending. But the BaD GuYs that arent memorable enough for me to even look up the names of are like look, we want to watch the world burn because we are Bad Guys, so either you are going to fight your brother to the death or we are going to snipe Kiryu’s daughter in the fucking head. Obviously he doesn’t know that Baba is going to betray them, so he has to pick between Saejima and Haruka. He chooses to potentially kill Saejima for Kiryu’s happiness. I’m sure if things didn’t change, Majima would have held back and let Saejima kill him. Majima would rather die than see Kiryu in pain. Majima would rather kill Saejima/let Saejima kill him than let Haruka die. If that’s not a giant declaration of unconditional love and devotion, I don’t know what else to tell you.

Anyway, thanks so much for indulging me and listening to my yakuza opinions if you made it this far you the mvp :’’’’)