#Transitioning to college

[emberglowfox]

”discord is for gaming” “discord is for talking to classmates” discord is for popping open the general chat in a server at 3 in the morning to go “hey guys i just remembered i can recite all of psalm 24 king james version from memory. im gonna type it” and then doing that

[trans-axolotl]

content note: discussion of suicide.

this next monday will be the six year anniversary of losing one of my friends to suicide.

when he died, my high school barely mentioned his death, even though for other students who died by things like car crashes or illness, there were so many public expressions of grief. they believed that having any memorials for a student who died by suicide would encourage other people to die the same way. in their rush to erase the circumstances of his death, they erased the memory of his life.

there are so many things i am angry at that high school about in terms of how they treated mental health (mandatory reporting and collaborating with cops, their refusal to recognize the ways in which that system led to peer-to-peer crisis support, their refusal to recognize the ways that trying to keep each other alive through trial and error was scary and exhausting, carceral disciplinary policies, etc etc etc). but i think one of the things i am still angriest about is the way they enforced shame around his death. it felt like they were retroactively blaming him for the constellation of circumstances that made suicide an option in his life. it felt like they were blaming those of us who missed him and cared about him and wanted to grieve him. it made those of us still there who were actively suicidal feel even more scared about the reaction if we did reach out for help from one of those mythical safe adults.

as an adult now involved in psych abolition/mad liberation work, it makes me so fucking mad to see the ways in which he was discarded by people in authority positions. and the older i get, the more options i have found in my life for making sense of the world and finding healing and community and support which were never available to him because he died when he was 16 and the only things offered to him were a carceral psychiatric system that blamed him for his own fucking death. it feels so incredibly unfair.

i miss him and i think i always will; i can't remember his laugh or the sound of his voice or his favorite color any more and that aches. this grief is so heavy and it feels harder in a new way each year, when i become older than he will ever be. sometimes meeting new comrades or seeing new anticarceral suicide support models hurts because i wish so fucking bad that we had that back then. i remember how close we came to losing even more people that year and i know it is simple fucking luck that i'm still here when he's not.

i remember another letter (never sent) that i wrote to a friend while they were in an ICU bed after a suicide attempt when i didn't know if they would live or not. i have spent so much time in the past 10 years begging for anything to keep me and my friends alive, but even in that letter i knew that there is so much fucking violence that is hidden beneath psychiatric logics of cure and safety that promise a "solution" to suicide. I knew that institutionalization, coercion, and shame would not have helped build a life more liveable for him or **** or any of the people i've loved and lost since.

there needs to be more fucking options for care and support that aren't so incredibly cruel to suicidal people. i know so many people doing incredible work in alternatives, peer respite, a million different frameworks for healing and liberation. but it makes me so mad every day i have to live in a world where there are still people restrained, locked up in psych wards, having all autonomy and personhood taken away from them. knowing there are dozens of people every day getting blamed for their deaths the same way he was blamed for his.

i miss him. i cared so fucking much for him. and he died by suicide, and all of those things are true. he has been dead for 6 years and he lived before that and the people who loved him want to remember all of him; our celebrations of his life should not require hiding the way that he died.

Image description: [1000 origami cranes in all different colors and patterns that are tied together in strings of 25]

(these were the 1000 cranes we made to give to his parents, in memorial and recognition of how much he meant to us.)

[greatbigbellies]

I feel like there are some really fun/hot/cute things you can go with pregnant trans women and while this is far from an exhaustive list, I'm always campaigning for more tfpreg so allow me to share some ideas.

Trans lady who hasn't seen her friends in a while... like the better part of a year, finally getting the reunite with them after some effective rounds of HRT. Everyone's excited to see her after some time transitioning... but they didn't anticipate her waddling in with a full term belly. Her confidence has grown as much as her tummy, and the previously very reserved egg they knew has turned into a beautiful, proud trans woman who isn't afraid to turn heads or take up some space... and with such an impressive belly, she does both quite well. She revels in having her tummy rubbed by her friends, and is very open to answering questions about her pregnancy. Turns out she's not full term, just 7 months with twins.

Trans lady whos still working out the whole "dressing nicely in femme clothes" thing... it doesn't come naturally to everyone, and she's still figuring out her look. Getting pregnant only applied more pressure. Her anime graphic tees now don't even reach her navel. The jeans that she's had for YEARS now don't even pull up past her baby-weight-expanded butt, let alone button. She keeps underestimating the size of her belly, so the maternity shirts she brings home to try to remedy the issue are still too tight to really fit. Perhaps both most excitingly and jarringly, her breasts have expanded enough between the HRT and pregnancy that she went from being fairly flat chested to having a capital R Rack. Thankfully, she has a good support network who are going to intervene to fix her wardrobe. Just in time for the third trimester.

Trans lady who is full term and struggling with her size. She's not one of the stereotypical lanky, tall trans girls who can leverage some extra height to keep the belly from getting too in the way. She's 5'4", 41 weeks with a 10 pound baby, and she's had enough. She loves painting her nails but bending over to do her toes is basically impossible, and while she tries to keep her legs shaved, the third trimester has been rough. Thankfully, she has a very supportive partner who goes the extra mile to help her feel comfortable and pretty while she's carrying their kid. Boxes of chocolates, pedicures, gentile help applying lotion to her body... she's pampered and feminine, as she should be.

[justinspoliticalcorner]

Andy Kroll and Nick Surgey at ProPublica:

ProPublica and Documented obtained more than 14 hours of never-before-published videos from Project 2025’s Presidential Administration Academy, which are intended to train the next conservative administration’s political appointees “to be ready on day one.” Project 2025, the controversial playbook and policy agenda created by the Heritage Foundation and its allies for a future conservative presidential administration, has lost its director. In recent weeks, it faced scathing criticism from both Democratic groups and former President Donald Trump, whose campaign has tried to distance itself from the effort. But Project 2025’s plan to train an army of political appointees who could battle against the so-called deep state government bureaucracy remains on track. Video trainings like these are one of the “four pillars” of that plan, says Spencer Chretien, the associate director of Project 2025, in “Political Appointees & The Federal Workforce.” For transparency, we are publishing the videos as we obtained them.

The Heritage Foundation and most of the people who appear in the videos cited in this story did not respond to ProPublica’s repeated requests for comment. Karoline Leavitt, a spokesperson for the Trump campaign, said, “As our campaign leadership and President Trump have repeatedly stated, Agenda 47 is the only official policy agenda from our campaign.”

ProPublica and Documented partner up to reveal 14+ hours’ worth of never-before-published videos from The Heritage Foundation’s Project 2025 Presidential Administration Academy.

[divorcedfiddleford]

it is friday my dudes (little hearts added by @tazmiilly)

[binders-and-beanies]

10 years ago today I publicly came out as trans :) guess it wasn’t a phase

[joytri]

november, a period of transition between fall (halloween) and winter (christmas).

[stuckinapril]

do u think it’s weird for an 18 and 21 yr old to date?

Yeah tbh. These are such big years for us. Me rn at 21 is so different from me at 18. You could argue that there’s a 21 year old out there who’s just as sheltered as an 18 year old—and to that I say probably, because there are exceptions to every case. But most 21 year olds have had more experience w relationships than 18 year olds. I would side eye any 21 year old who’d see it as appealing to date someone who’s 18. Just not appropriate to me

[romanceyourdemons]

i do enjoy the improved vision these glasses give me and i believe these are the best frames for me. unfortunately they also make me look exactly like a guy who is about to recommend you a french new wave film and has opinions on quentin tarantino and/or slasher horror film. which i am and i do, but that doesn’t mean i want to like it. does anyone want to watch le cercle rouge (1970) with me

[bitchesgetriches]

Hiya! I have an English Literature degree. After graduating I had no idea what to do, so worked miscellaneous jobs then got into a Technical Theatre course that was a lot more vocational and I thought would lead to a career. Now I'm realising I'm miserable and will likely drop out. But then I'm back to my original situation of not knowing what to do with myself. I just want a stable, steady job I enjoy enough, with work-life balance and a salary I can live comfortably on. Any advice at all??? I feel so lost

Oh honey! I'm so sorry you're going through all this doubt and anxiety. That really fucking sucks.

We wrote a two-parter about choosing a career that I think should help. It's geared at high schoolers, but I think it works for anyone transitioning careers as well.

High School Students Have No Way of Knowing What Career to Choose. Why Do We Make Them Do It Anyway? 

The Actually Helpful, Nuanced, Non-Bullshit Way to Choose a Future Career 

Plus here are a few more that I think will motivate you:

Your College Major May Not Prepare You for Your Job—but It Can Prepare You for Life 

My Career Transition Succeeded When I Gave Fewer Fucks, Made More Friends, and Had More Fun 

If you found this helpful, tip us!

[spn2006]

if sam winchester was transfem then there absolutely would’ve been a bit in the first episode where dean sees her at stanford for the first time since she transitioned, doesn’t recognise her, and just immediately starts flirting with this vaguely familiar 6’5” hot girl like the horny motherfucker he is. and of course sam plays along bc when is the next time she’s gonna get to embarrass her brother THIS bad

[tipytap]

the Make Some Noise intro music is so fucking bangin every time i hear it i do a little jazzy jig 🕺💃🕺💃🕺💃

[cecilsucksass]

ok i know pride month just ended but oh my lord i need advice. ive been using one name that i chose in like five minutes for about 3 years and im. fine with it? but i would definitely prefer to use something else if i could. basically what im saying is changing my name once was already embarrassing for me especially as a very introverted autistic dude. so i dont want to do it again. but also i would be so much happier. so.

TLDR i need to change my name IMMEDIATELY but i do not know how eeuuuggghhh

[gelarshiesprofruitboarder]

i was trying 2 figure out a design 4 old/even older summer n i dont rlly feel like posting it here but. this doodles funny to me so yeah

[glittergroovy]

was gonna make a little "if you enjoy my glitter & blinkies, send me a tip for my bday" post ...

but also the relative who'd agreed to help me with rent & college costs backed out because she doesn't want me to transition. AND my delivery of groceries & cleaning supplies was just stolen 😮‍💨 so help is super extra appreciated rn. I'm having dismally bad luck job hunting.

kofi or throne (you can send stuff directly to me through this + it has a wishlist. Brita filter & food are most important!)

venmo is Grubcore

[katimanki]

Lesbyler at 6, 12 and 22 🌈