#actually yes there is something more terrifying and that is being in a car with a drunk driver. happened to me once when I was 24

[rimouskis]

is there anything more terrifying than driving and realizing a driver near you is clearly under the influence, driving erratically and unpredictably

[shawnxstyles]

baby honey 2

DATE: NOVEMBER 5, 2023

summary: you and harry need to talk. so, you do. along with other things.

song: Fantasy- the driver era

words: 7.2k

warnings: SMUT (f- receiving [oral, choking], daddy kink, slight dumbification, mentions of voyurism/exhibitism [not clearly stated] and porn, protected sex, dirty talk!!), language, and a very blunt y/n.

note: i actually got a part two out not that long after the first part?? omg?? monumental moment here guys. enjoy! PART ONE!

secret pornstar!harry x secret pornstar!y/n

—

DaylightDaddy [verified]: What are you doing to me?

You were waiting by your computer for the longest sixteen minutes of your life. That’s how long it took Harry to watch your less-than-ten-minute video and then text you back. Your heart, which was still flat on the floor of your stomach, leaps excitedly when it sees Harry’s message on your computer screen.

That message alone verified to you that DaylightDaddy was indeed Harry. Of course Harry would bring back his infamous saying at a time like this. You wanted to ditch the conversation on this website and text Harry personally. You also wanted to go to his house and pounce on him for being ridiculously attractive and vulnerable. You were an idiot by not saying anything yesterday and he was an idiot by being so blunt and angry. You both could have ruined not only your friendship but your chances at being something more by not talking. Communication is key, yet you’re still locked.

Why?

Maybe because somewhere in the dark crack of your heart, you’re terrified that you’ll be vulnerable to a man that’s six years older than you just for him to say that he doesn’t actually like you. He just likes your breasts and the idea of sleeping with you.

But that’s not Harry, right?

Without responding to his message, you grab your phone that has been forgotten on your floor. The second you sent that video to him you chucked it across the room and hoped for the best. It seems as though it worked, but at the same time, there is still so much unsaid with Harry. So many feelings you need to work out. But first, you need to talk and figure out how you both actually feel. Is it just lust? Is it just the fact that you two work together? Or is it something more?

Y/N: harry

He texts you almost simultaneously.

Harry: Y/N

Your fingers freeze at the keyboard. Even though you were just talking to him, how do you bring up such a serious conversation. We need to talk? Or I need to talk to you? They both sound bad.

Harry: Are you working today?

You and Harry both know damn well neither of you works. Him asking this question just seems like he’s continuing to avoid you, and avoid the inevitable conversation that you guys need to have. Did your video not spark a lightbulb in his head? How can he not tell that you do feel whatever he feels? Maybe even more…

Y/N: i am not, but i think you know that

Y/N: can we talk? are you busy?

You know he’s not busy, but that doesn’t make his reaction any scarier.

Harry: I’m free

Harry: Do you want to come over

It was one of the scariest texts he’s ever sent. After what just went down between you two, inviting you over could mean anything. It’s clear there’s a strong attraction connecting you both, but there is also a lot of murky water that needs to be cleaned.

Y/N: yes

Harry: Let me pick you up

That stubbornness inside of you that Harry is all too familiar with wanted to fight him. To tell him that you are more than capable of driving yourself, even though you only have Penny’s car for one more day. But him suggesting to pick you up showed his desperation to see you. And maybe that was a good thing. Maybe the forward action instead of the backing away was what you two needed.

Y/N: okay

Y/N: give me an hour!!

You needed time to think about it of course.

—

Within that hour, you were going crazy. You took a warm, hard-pressed shower in order to massage all the tension in your body and hopefully in your mind. You thought about every possible scenario about seven thousand times, hoping that you’d get it right. This time, you planned to say the right words and not stand there like a fucking statue when faced with his vulnerability. This time, you were going to be vulnerable too, because you’ve never had a chance at something more like this before. And you don’t want to ruin it just because you’re afraid. How lame is that?

While you were waiting for Harry to text you, you pace around the room. Your eyes averted to your computer that was still lying on your bed, and the only thing you could think about was your conversation with Harry. Not only had he called you attractive but he compared your beauty to everyone on the website and still said you were the most attractive. Was that just him flirting? Or was he being serious? You wondered if Harry really felt that way about you and you hoped you would find out soon.

On that thought, you never even checked if his money went through. You know the second that it does you’ll be giving it right back to him. So, while you’re still waiting, you open up your bank app on your phone. Even though you’re sitting on your bed now, your leg is still bouncing up and down, anxiety infiltrating your blood like the most insane drug.

When you finally comprehend the number that is present on your screen, your eyes nearly pop out of their sockets. You blink a couple hundred times before briskly checking your most recent transactions. In neon green letters an extravagant $2000+ appears in front of you. Your hand jaggedly and slowly finds its way over your agape mouth, bewildered at Harry’s extreme act. What on earth would cause Harry to willingly send you that much money? Yes, you have complained about your financial situation, but you also clearly denied Harry of a loan. Now, you have to send his money back and it’s going to be really awkward. Another thing you have to add to your list of “Things to Talk Through with Harry”. Just as you close the app, Harry texts you that he’s at your place.

–

“Hey,” You manage to cough out as you slide nervously into his passenger seat.

“Hey,” Harry replies with a thick swallow. His grip on the steering wheel changes from intense to loose every few seconds before he starts the car.

There’s a low hum on the radio along with his air conditioning blowing cool air towards you. But other than that, no one had said a word. You peek over the dashboard a few times to see the road, wondering how far Harry lives from you and how quickly you can get out of this car. You hoped when you got to his house that this unbreathable, anxious tension would have died down, so you two can finally sort this shit out.

As a few more minutes pass by, you realize that you hate this. You hate the awkward silence that’s dawning over your friendship and making you overthink every single word. It’s never been like this with Harry, ever. You’ve never had to second-guess your late-night conversations and he never had to restrain his friendly charm. This, this tension, is unlike both of you.

You have to talk. Maybe you should mention the money?

“I know y’want to say something. Just say it, please, I can’t stand this awkwardness,” Harry blurts out as he stops at a red light. You inhale and blink, suddenly feeling a bit more alive with the sound of his voice.

“I looked at my bank,” You said, looking down at your lap. You were already being shy and you haven’t even got to the actual vulnerable stuff yet. What is wrong with you?

“Have you?”

“Yeah, and I saw the money you gave me.”

“Good.”

“Harry, you know I can’t take that,” Now, you turn your head towards his, which is safely facing the road. But you know he sees you and you know he’s stressed with your stubbornness.

“But you already did. It’s in your account, yeah?”

“Okay, but–”

“I don’t understand why you won’t take my money. Is it not good enough for you or somethin’?” Harry’s voice has become more agitated, making his last turn a bit sharper. You see him take a deep breath as he pulls into a driveway of a nice house. It was nice because the lawn was green and cut and the color of its walls were a pleasant cream color with a smooth navy blue as its border. It wasn’t the biggest house ever, but Harry was more practical than that. He didn’t need some huge, showy house in order to seem cool. Harry was already cool, whether he knew it or not.

“All money is the same, you doy.”

“You didn’t want it when I said I could loan it to you. Then I found a way to give it to you because you earned it and you still won’t take it. How does that make sense?”

“That’s different!”

“How is that different?”

“You of all people should know!”

Harry groans out of frustration and gets out of the car. “Let’s just get in the house.”

You follow suit, shutting the car door a little more roughly than you thought. Before you know it, you’re in his house and it’s just so Harry. His furniture is smooth; all browns and woods. He had pictures of his family scattered along with abstract art. By his decently sized television is a large record player next to an impressive case of vinyls. He even has a miniature bookshelf full of books that would probably bore you, but it still fascinates you.

“What, have you never seen a house before?”

“Don’t get all snappy with me. We were supposed to talk.”

“You make it difficult.”

“Why? Because I won’t take your money?”

“That doesn’t help,” he crosses his arms before dropping to sit on his couch. Again, you follow him, but keep your distance. You don’t miss the way his house smells just like him; a homey breeze of fresh air with a sprinkle of nature. It was earthly and friendly and charming. Just like him. “But it’s your stubbornness.”

To be fair, your stubbornness is one of Harry’s favorite traits about you. But it’s also the one that gets under his skin the most. He admires the way you can stand up for yourself and you know how to get exactly what you want. But he’s noticed that your need for independence interferes with your other desires.

“I can’t help it. I was born to fight,” You sighed out, lying against the couch cushions. “At least that’s what my dad always says.”

“I don’t want to fight, Honey,” The new nickname has rows of shivers cascading your skin. You feel a tingle in your stomach that you get when he says something charming or flirtatious. It’s impossible to fight the butterflies and heart pulses he gives you.

“Me either,” You take a deep breath, just like you did in the shower and just like Harry did in the car. This was your time to be vulnerable, to be first. You wanted to show Harry that you cared and that you weren’t just being stubborn to be annoying. You loved when you guys would close together, even if you consistently told him you would do it yourself. You loved the late-night talks you would have while cleaning up the bar, talking about anything and everything in order to waste time. You were endeared that Harry always walked you to your car in the early morning after the doors were locked just to make sure you were safe. You missed the way his hands felt on your arms when he caught you and the feeling of his chest pressed closely to yours. Friends don’t crave like that. No, because you weren’t friends. You were more and you both knew it. You cared about him and you appreciated his care for you. Shit, you freaking liked him and it took you both revealing your secret identities to prove it. Even if you two haven’t technically talked about it.

“H…”

“Y/N.”

“Everything you told me that night. Was it true?”

There was a weighted beat. One that was long and heavy enough to shatter the earth.

“Yes, of course it was. Why would I lie about that?”

“I don’t–” You turned to face him. “I’m not…good at this stuff. I don’t randomly hook up with people or go on dates. I especially don’t go to their house after sending them a video of me orgasming to confess my feelings to them.”

Harry blinks. He didn’t think you would mention it so vulgarly, but maybe he doesn’t know you like he thought he did. But he would like to. He doesn’t sound like you’re accusing him of doing those things, more of just you warning him about yourself. Harry does extract the little hint of your words and uses them to interrogate you.

“Feelings. What feelings?”

“Well, currently I’m frustrated–”

“Y/N,” his voice of seriousness causes your eyes to drop into your lap. You fiddle with your thumbs like a nervous kindergartener on their first day of school. It wasn’t like you to get so shy. You were a bartender for a living; you couldn’t be shy. But you just haven’t reserved these types of feelings for someone in so long it feels foreign. It feels as though you’re stretching outside of your comfortable zone and forcing you to be sheepish with your eyes down.

“Fine. I like…our friendship. A lot. But this week made me realize that I want more than that. With you,” You peer up at him through your eyelids, hoping not to see his face cringe with disgust at your words. But Harry’s face is flattened straight with nothing but the intent of listening. He even has a sparkle of softness in his eyes that makes your heart lurch out to him. He cared, and it showed in his features. Your mom always told you that people’s real emotions were always revealed on their face, and it was written like a love letter over his.

His patient silence makes you want to fill it with some type of conversation due to the uncomfortableness with your sudden vulnerability. Skittishly, you swallow in an attempt to coat your dry throat. “But I haven’t got much further than that. I know that I’m attracted to you. I mean, fuck, you saw the video, right? I probably didn’t even need the bullet–what did I just say? That’s not what I wanted to say. I wanted to say that I don’t want this to just be an attraction because I don’t think I could handle that. That felt good to say. I think I’ve said “say” too much and now it sounds weird…”

“I feel that way too,” he replies, the smallest curve of his lip breaking the straight line. He adores the way you rant when you're nervous, it is now a new thing he is adding to his list. He loves making you nervous because you give him little details about yourself. “Thank you for finally getting the balls to tell me. Took you long enough.”

You didn’t expect him to say that. You didn’t practice that in the shower! “Me?! You were the one who was avoiding me!” You were shouting, but it was all fun now. A laugh followed as a bright smile crept on your face. Something like a weight felt lifted off your shoulders, off your chest.

“But who said something first?”

“You said you liked my breasts and that you get jealous easily. Doesn’t seem like you were confessing any feelings,” You jokingly roll your eyes as he scoots closer to you.

“Why would I get jealous if I didn’t like ya? Thought I made tha’ obvious.”

“Could have been more. Then we could have avoided this all together.”

“You probably would’ve just stood there with y’mouth open.”

Your mouth indeed falls open as he laughs, his comment causing you to gasp in joking offense. You take that moment to punch his shoulder, but his hand catches your wrist during the movement. Your laughs are halted when you both realize how close you are; your thighs were touching and his face was only a few inches from yours. The whiff of his scent gave you flashbacks to last night when he caught you and you were pressed perfectly against his toned chest. Thinking of his chest made you remember the videos you saw online and how addicting they were to watch, especially after you found out it actually was Harry. Now, you know how porn addicts come to be.

Unintentionally, you lick your lips while looking at his. You don’t miss the way he does the same, glaring at your lips like he’s starving and their his last meal. Your lips have haunted him ever since your first day; painted in red and screaming fierce. The way you smiled was mesmerizing to Harry, but you could say the same about Harry’s effortless charm. It’s been too long dreaming and imagining your lips on his own. Now, with everything out in the open–besides the whole porn star thing, which is for another time–maybe he can finally kiss those lips. Kiss them so well that he ruins any other man for you in the bar, in school, in porn, in life. Staring at your lips made Harry think crazy things. He can’t even imagine the filth his brain will conjure if he sees your naked body in real life.

He’s getting too ahead of himself.

“You smell good,” You whispered, forcing yourself to break the pressing tension. You two were slowly inching towards each other, so he could feel your words float over his own lips like a ghost. He hums at the feeling and the compliment. “Like a forest.”

“How long are we gonna sit like this until I can kiss ya?” The statement made your cheeks blaze with fire and your stomach tumble.

Clearly you were both done beating around the bush.

“I was waiting for you to ask! What if you didn’t want to? You know how important consent is too–”

But Harry doesn’t wait for you to stop your incessant rant. He smashes his lips to yours like he’s been dying to all this time. Your lips mush together, creating a warm, gooey feeling inside of your stomach. Harry releases your wrist and slides his hands down to your waist and carries you over to his lap. You gently bite down on his bottom lip seductively, causing him to groan against you. His rough hands pinch the skin of your hips, making you squeak in his mouth. He uses the opportunity to slide his tongue in, exploring your mouth like its new land on earth.

It’s been so long for you, you can barely remember the last time you’ve been kissed. But you know for damn sure it was never like this. It was never this fiery, this passionate, this wanted, this needed. Kissing Harry was like drinking water after being dehydrated; so obsessively satisfying, you can’t get enough. Until you drink too much and then your stomach hurts, but you doubt that will happen.

Harry can feel himself growing impressively hard underneath you. Even with you above him fully clothed has his body and mind going haywire. He’s not sure how far this is going to go, but he’s also not sure how long he’s going to last. Shit, if you even palm his bulge he might come.

And you thought he didn’t want this.

Your hands around his neck slide their way down his chest as his grip on your hips gets tighter. He pushes you closer, making you arch your back until your breasts are pressing against his chest. The abrupt movement causes the kiss to break, a breathless gasp eliciting from your swollen mouth.

“Jesus,” Harry huffs out.

“What?”

Harry ignores your question. “What do y’want?”

“You…? I thought I made that pretty clear–”

“Don’t be a smart mouth. Or I’ll put it to good use,” His threat sends a tingle straight to your core, which was covered by your soaking underwear. Just the idea of him forcing you on the floor to take his cock in your throat was erotic enough for you to get off of. Actually doing it might make you come on the spot. “What, you like that?”

“What if I do?”

“Then I can make it happen, baby.”

“But what if I want something else more?”

“Say the words.”

You hesitated. As a porn star, you’re pretty good with dirty talk. In the past, you have had no problem whispering sweet, seductive words. But Harry has your tongue tied, brain mushy, and body gooey.

“I want you inside of me.” You were straight-forward. Honest. After this whole ordeal with you two, you figured you both deserved some relief.

“I’ve been waiting too fuckin’ long for those words.”

Without wasting another minute, Harry lifts both you and himself off the couch. You make a little squeal sound before grabbing on tight to him so you don’t fall. When you somehow get to his bedroom, you’re gently tossed on his bed with a smile hanging from your lips. Harry climbs over you and immediately tugs the hem of your shirt.

“Please take it off.”

You did not need to tell him twice.

Harry did just as you asked as quickly as possible because you two were both getting a bit desperate. Like before, Harry loves edging and teasing and being in control. And one day, he’s going to do it all with you. But right now, he just needs to be inside of you, as selfish as it sounds.

Once he flips your shirt off, you’re brisk to clip off your bra. Goosebumps pimple along your skin in anticipation of what’s to come as Harry’s eyes flit over your body. He swallows harshly, mind swimming in a thousand thoughts that were all related to you. His searing gaze only makes you more flushed with heat, elbows sinking into the mattress while you wait for him to do something. You push yourself up and tug the end of his T-shirt.

“Well, what is it? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“‘Cause you’re really here.”

“That is so sweet, but please, fuck me first. I need it.” Maybe his searing gaze also gave you a newfound confidence that allowed you to say what was actually on your mind. His intense stare made you feel powerful. Like you were in control.

“Jesus Christ, we have to fix that mouth,” he growls as you slide off his shirt over his head while he kneels on the edge of the bed. You don’t even get another word in before he’s crashing his lips back onto yours in another heated kiss.

It’s not much different from the first one–maybe a little more sloppy because you’re both getting needy. Both your mouths are sloshed together with sparks tingling on your tongues. Those sparks are igniting flames within your souls, making the stress and yearning worth it. Everything felt worth it when you two were this close together.

With the same passion, Harry forces himself away from your mouth and down your neck. He’s not gentle with his teeth, nibbling with each peck of your skin he passes. Each nick injects excitement through your veins, turning you on more than you would like to admit. You already know that there will be little marks because your skin is so sensitive, but you can’t find it in yourself to care. You actually are endeared by a bunch of little marks rather than a few huge ones. Maybe you can pass the miniature hickies off as freckles…

When Harry gets to your breasts, he wants to stop and stare. Take a few long minutes to just encompass the beauty that is in front of him. But he assumes you don’t want to be ogled anymore, since he was standing still and gazing at you like a teenage girl taking a picture of a pink sunset. So, instead, his lips enclose around your nipple. His tongue glides around it, feeling its pointiness peak until he is satisfied with the sounds coming from your lewd mouth. He does the same to the other side until you’re panting and your heart has turned erratic.

His pink lips trail down your torso, marking each inch of skin with a bit of saliva and a warm kiss. His fingers traced your shape, gently scratching at your sides until you were practically squirming in his touch. You’ve never been this wet in your life and it was driving you insane. Harry was driving you insane.

“So soft, Honey,” he coos when he reaches the waistline of your pants. You help him remove the clothing, so you’re not wasting anymore time because it’s blatantly obvious you’re both desperate as hell. His compliment made your skin tingle and your spine shiver. That nickname would be the death of you, you were sure of it. He made you feel all hot and dizzy but also made you gooey and cared for. It was an intense combination of emotions that you definitely needed to sort out. But after you get his cock inside of you.

Yeah. You could settle for that.

Harry now had a full view of your underwear, which was completely soaked through. But at this point, you’re not even embarrassed as much as you are needy. Hell, you’re even spreading your legs wider for him so he has quicker access to you. Yeah. It was that bad.

“Look at you all wet and drippy,” Harry smirks as he hooks his fingers in your panties. He surprises you by pulling them up, the fabric being consumed by your pussy lips. “Such a pretty cunt. Never even seen you this wet on a video. I must be special.”

“It’s all for you, Harry. Or should I say Daddy?” Now, you were smirking. You were only teasing, but at the same time, you were testing the waters. If Harry’s username used the title, you had an inkling that he had some type of kink towards it, right?

With a subtle grunt, he yanks your legs closer to him and widens them even further apart. He doesn’t even hesitate to rip your panties in half and discard the now wasted fabric.

“Harry!” You yelled, shocked at how quickly bare you are. And that he just shredded your underwear. But it was also kind of hot. Like very hot. He slapped the inside of your thigh as a warning, a stinging zip coursing straight to your core.

“No more Harry for you. Since y’want to be such a smart mouth, when you speak, y’better say Daddy.”

Before you know it, his head is lowering towards your cunt. His lips latch onto your clit similarly to your nipple and suck. You let out a gasping moan, fingers instantly clawing at the sheets of his bed. His tongue delves into your folds and warmly slips into you like you wished his cock would. But you were currently in heaven with the heat of his mouth devouring you like his last meal on Earth.

The way his large hands gripped and man-handled your thighs was enough to leave bruising. But you wanted the bruising. You wanted to feel the pain and soreness of this tomorrow just in case it never happens again. You’re not sure what all of this is going to mean for you guys, but you don’t think this will be the end. No, you think it’s going to be the beginning.

You could feel yourself getting wetter with each lick and slurp. Your tailbone was beginning to ache from arching your back to the absolute max. Once that all-too familiar feeling was rushing towards you like a train, Harry’s mouth only got quicker. He even started spitting on your cunt and watched the juices mix together, and that only made your insides clench at the lewdness of it all. Harry was a dirty, dirty man. You knew he was only showing bits and pieces of himself. You wanted to unravel it all and learn more about him and what he liked. But maybe that was for another time…

Without realizing it, your hands were sewn in his brown curls, forcing his head to remain on your clit until you reached your high. Harry’s groans were muffled into vibrations as you tugged, getting more pleasure through them. Your hips were moving in circular motions, but Harry pressed you down with his forearm to keep you flat and still.

“Har–” He pinched your ass, causing you to shriek and correct yourself, “Daddy, please, I’m so close. I’m right there.”

You rarely begged. On your livestreams and videos, you were confident and sexy and seducing because that’s what your audience liked. It’s what you’ve learned and grown to do. You weren’t used to needing something from someone else so fucking bad that you were pleading for them to make you satisfied. Harry’s mouth was currently your kryptonite because you would do anything for him to get you to the finish line.

He suckled on your clit for a few long seconds before you were coming in his mouth. Chants of his title were echoing loudly in his room that the neighbors probably thought you were dying. You were, just in a different way. Harry was gladly swallowing all your juices , his chin sloppy with all them. When it all got too much, you tried to push him away, but he didn’t move until he was completely done.

“Taste so sweet. Just like honey.”

He doesn’t fail to bring more heat onto your skin, even after just having his mouth on you. Something about the way he compliments you and manages to incorporate the word honey will always get you. He seems to read you so easily, and no one’s ever done that before.

“Knew from the video that you’d taste amazing.”

“Yeah?”

“I can’t believe you sent me that video by the way.”

“What? Why?”

“What if it wasn’t me?”

“It’s my job, Harry.”

“So? You were moanin’ my name. That means it’s for me. You’re for me.” The staring that was occurring between you quickly ended as your eyes flitted away from him. You made sure to look anywhere else but him as you heard the sound of his pants falling. Sometimes, Harry could be pretty blunt in the way he claimed you, but at the same time very guarded. He’s saying that you’re his, but you two haven’t even discussed things that far yet.

“Says who?”

“Says me. Right now,” Harry practically growls as he climbs over your body again, his insane physique hovering over you. You never thought you would actually see the day that Harry–the charming, tattooed, sexy man you worked with–was on top of you. You’ve only ever envisioned him in your wet dreams doing the most sinful things known. God wouldn’t be able to forgive the sins you’ve conjured in your brain.

You don’t even get to retort because you’re only thinking about his cock. You had felt his impressive bulge on the couch and assumed he had been rocking himself into the bed while eating you out. As he kissed your neck again, you would feel his hardness poking at you greedily, but you haven’t even looked at it yet. It was probably just as pretty as it was in all his videos.

He extends himself towards his night stand while you’re caught in your thoughts, snatching a condom. You’re glad he didn’t ask to go bare like most guys do. But “most guys” to you are a bunch of college losers who just want to get their dick wet and don’t actually care about the consequences. If you were to get pregnant, they probably wouldn’t even blink an eye before leaving. But you knew Harry wasn’t like that. No, he was the type to think things through and actually be mature about things. Besides the fact that he avoided you…but it’s not like you were very mature about it either. Maybe the age distance between you and Harry was something that you needed. The college boys just weren’t doing it for you.

It’s strange how so many thoughts can sprout from a simple as Harry grabbing a condom. The bare fucking minimum.

“What’s wrong?” Harry’s voice was full of concern as his thick thumb rubbed over your warm cheek. You hadn’t even realized how close he had gotten since he had stretched over towards the drawer and you didn’t know that he’d already put the condom on. So, again, you missed the sight of his huge, God-like dick in-person. Despite all of that, a ping of appreciation hit you right in the heart at Harry’s attention to detail because you know that those college boys wouldn’t have noticed a damn thing.

“Nothing, I–”

“Don’t lie, Honey. Do y’still want this? We don’t have to,” he reassured, eyes sparking with something that was different from the hidden lust. His voice could be rough and firm, but it could also be soothing and sweet. He had these sides to him that he would encompass. Not necessarily switch like a light but transition into smoothly.

“Harry, I’m fine. I promise. This is the only thing I want right now,” You rested your hand on top of his on your cheek. At that moment, everything felt a little more intimate. A little more love-like. The idea of sex turning into “love-making” currently terrified you, but the racing of your heart wasn’t from fear. No, it felt like it was exciting and anxious but in the best way. “Actually, I would be not so fine if you didn’t put your dick in me.”

“You have such a dirty mouth when you’re blunt, Honey,” Harry smoothes his hand down your body and finds your clit again, rubbing gentle circles over the throbbing nerves. Even though you just came only minutes prior, you continued to get wet with every second you were waiting for him. The sight of his body with all those beautiful designs was enough to get you ready for another. He didn’t even have to work you up.

“Thought that’s what you wanted.”

“I’m hearin’ more attitude than screams of m’name. Let’s change that.”

With a devilish smirk, Harry pushes himself close to you and levels into you. His cock enters you slowly but fully as your lungs forget to breathe. Realizing this, you breathe before Harry can scold you about it. His dick was nearly all in because you could feel the weight of his thighs hovering over you deliciously along with the rest of his tattooed body.

When Harry hears and sees you take a deep breath, he pulls out just to push back in again. You elicit a shaky moan as Harry groans gravelly near your chest.

“Fuckin’ hell,” Harry moans louder into the air as his thrusts become harder, more direct. With just those few thrusts, he already knows exactly where your weakness is and makes it his life goal to hit it every single time.

Harry’s hips move rapidly, pinning your body to the bed as you wiggle underneath him. His muscles are contracting against the pressure of each insane plunge into you while your insides are being reassorted. His size makes it difficult to move, difficult to breathe, yet you’re loving it immensely.

Staring at his arms, you don’t even think about grabbing one of his arms that’s holding him up and laying it on your neck. One of Harry’s furrowed eyebrows lifts up in surprise before that familiar smirk is plastered right back onto his smug face.

“Fuckin’ filthy. I knew you were. What else are y’hiding from me?” Harry’s hand wraps around your neck just as you silently asked. As his fingers block your air flow just enough to make you a little fuzzy, your cunt clenched around his cock. Besides your moans and groans and whimpers, the sound of skin to skin is bouncing across the bedroom like your own personal song. Your anthem. When he releases, the blood flow returns, but he keeps his hand there. “C’mon, Y/N, tell me. What other kinks do you have?”

“I know y’like it rough. Don’t like it when Daddy goes too easy on ya. Do you like to be spanked too? Hmm? Slapped and bitten? Like to have marks all over you so everyone can see?” His brutal thrusts never stop, not even when his breath becomes a little lost. He’s slamming into you like he’s trying to make a dent in your organs, and quite frankly, he just might if he keeps going at the rate he is. But you don’t seem to care too much at the moment. “Do you like people watching? Is that why you post videos of our pretty, little cunt all over the internet? So people can watch you?”

“I don’t hear you,” his voice, raspy and sexy, whispered in a low-threat type of way as his hand rubs over the pulse of your neck temptingly again.

“I g-guess I do like people watching me…” Your voice was breathless as your mind became foggy. Harry did have a way of doing that to you, especially with his hand on your now strained neck. “L-Like when you watch me.”

“‘Course you do. That’s ‘cause you’re dirty. Just like me.” If it was possible, he rocks into you more barbarically until your legs are shaking. You can feel the muscles in your thighs start to spasm, urging to close as you chase your inevitable high.

“Daddy, God, you’re so big. So, so big,” You whined helplessly into the sex-filled air. Your hairs were scratching, tugging, pulling, clawing at everything at the same time, trying to manage all the intense pleasure that was coursing through your body. It was almost too much to handle. Harry seemed to know how to push your limits without killing you, and you’ve craved that feeling for so long. “L-Love your cock. Oh my God!”

“Poor baby. I’ve gotten you all cock drunk; you can’t think of anything else besides m’cock. ‘S that good, huh?” A choppy chuckle elicits from his mouth and wavers over to your ear. Your chest was pressing into his as your core clutched with the sense of near-orgasm. “Gonna come soon, baby?”

“Yes, yes, yes…” You were a mumbled, grumbled mess. You couldn’t think straight, couldn’t talk straight. Harry was impairing all of your abilities with his dirty talk and his magical dick.

No, seriously. Was it like a thick magic wand or something?

Harry squeezes on your neck a couple times, lightly, just to push you right over the edge. Harry seemed to be a quick learner when it came to your body because you were instantly coming then. As Harry felt you orgasm for the second time tonight, he finally let go of his own. When you were coming around his tongue at the beginning of this all, he was having a hard time trying to not come in his own pants. He may have been stupid last night and selfish earlier, but he wasn’t going to do it again. He was going to make up for being a selfish prick and show you how he actually treats a woman. Because you deserve to be treated with nothing less than the best.

After you’re both settled, Harry regretfully slips out of you. Clearly, you felt the same way because you whined as he removed himself. After being inside of you and passing through the gates of heaven, why would Harry want to leave? But even though Harry wants to be as close to you as possible by simply cockwarming all day, he doesn’t want to rush this. It’s new, even if you guys have been friends for some time.

Plucking off the condom and knotting it, Harry waltzes towards his bathroom to grab a towel to clean you up. The soft smile on your face when he returns highlights how grateful you are for his aftercare as he gently wipes up the mess both of you helped create.

“How do you feel?” Harry genuinely asks before placing the towel at the foot of his bed. He briskly moves to his dresser to pick out a new pair of boxers.

“I’m sorry if this offends you, but you have a great ass,” You bluntly state, completely avoiding his question. “But I’m okay.”

Harry laughs as he slips on the clothing. “Just okay? No pain?”

“Yeah. If okay translates to “my vagina is broken for every man ever and both my legs are going to hate me tomorrow”,” You smile innocently as Harry grabs two shirts. He chucks one at you, smiling goofily. It hits you in the face with a laugh before you slip it over your head.

“Good.”

“Good? I might have to take a week off work to heal from the damages.”

“Guess you’ll just have to stay in my bed.”

You roll your eyes before pushing yourself off his bed, contradicting his statement.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to my real boyfriend’s house,” You roll your eyes again facetiously and leave his room, rounding the same corner that he did before yelling, “Bathroom!”

When you return, you plop yourself on Harry’s bed like it was normal. It was comfortable. It felt right. It wasn’t awkward, it wasn’t forced. That was the good thing about two friends getting together. After sex, or work, or school, or just a bad day, or even a good day, they could always just talk. As you sat on Harry’s bed, it was easy to joke and make conversation while still feeling that subtle spark of electricity in between you two. That spark was the difference between platonic and romantic.

“We should watch a movie,” You suggested.

“Where should we look? PornHub?” His dry humor made you laugh as you cozied up in his bed. He didn’t hesitate to pull you close and you liked that. Maybe a little too much for your own good. Your heart was thumping in a way that was melting away the frozen walls around it. It made you happy that something in your life finally seemed to be working out.

“Maybe start with Netflix,” You laid your head on his shoulder as the ironic logo appeared on his TV. “I, um.”

“What?” Harry peeked down at you.

“I think I like this a lot,” Harry smiles at you. He could tell from the beginning that it was hard for you to say things like that to him. That’s why it made him feel like such an asshole for storming out the other night. You needed time to process everything he had just told you, but he was too nervous for your rejection, so he left. Even though he’s six years older than you and may seem more mature, everyone makes stupid and selfish mistakes.

“Well, I hope so, Honey, ‘cause I do too,” Even those simple words have the ability to warm and satisfy your scared, little heart.

“But I’m still not taking your money.”

–

i hope you all liked these two :))

taglist:

@whoreonmondays @armystay89 @meighasfangirldiary @bisexual-desi @littlenatilda @crybabyddl @tiaamberxx @alwaysclassyeagle @raajali3 @likeapplejuicenpeach | @kathb59 @gem1712 @ppleasingg @onlyangle1 @buckybarnessimpp @hannah9921 @storyschanging

crossed out= not able to tag

[magics-neptunes-things]

Clouds

Trigger warning : Angst, car accident, hospitals.

PART 2 (Ona's POV) IS HERE

______________________________________________________________

Celebrating a new victory for FC Barcelona, you find yourself with almost all of your teammates in an establishment which has been privatized just for you. It's now 2 o'clock in the morning and you saw Mapi and Ingrid slip away more or less discreetly already one hour ago. You think you were the only one to see them go and you couldn’t help but wink at Ingrid when your eyes crossed. She blushed slightly before raising both eyebrows in your direction.

Well maybe you weren’t in the best position to tease her, Ona was sitting on your lap with her drink in her hand while talking with Alexia. Even though you’ve only been together for a one year and some more, you can’t deny that you’re already totally crazy about the spaniard. You met the summer she came back from Manchester.

You had already met her several times on the football fields, already noticing her beauty, but when you got to know her more it was like love at first sight. And by a real miracle, it seems that the feelings are shared. You still wonder every morning when you wake up next to her how a woman like Ona Batlle could focus her attention on you.

Lost in your thoughts, you come back to earth only when you feel her lips gently land in your neck.

"Dance with me?" she asks and you smile lightly.

"You know that I'm a terrible dancer"

It was true. You're a forward and you have good dribbling skills, but when it comes to coordinating your moves on a dance floor, we’re not far from disaster.

Ona pouts and you roll your eyes. That’s enough for her to jump on both legs with a big smile, understanding that you just gave up.

"So smitten"

You hear Alexia teasing and make her a grimace over your shoulder as Ona drags you to the dance floor, making her grin in return. Alexia is your bestfriend and you know she's in really very happy you found someone to be happy with. And the Someone being Ona Batlle, she didn't understand why she never thought to introduce you before.

You have to admit that you have fun with Ona on the dance floor. You weren't really dancing, more goofing around, laughing and swaying when the music go soft.

That's actually where you are, your arms keeping your girlfriend very close to your body. Her hands are around your neck and you kind of got lost in her beautiful eyes. She kisses you and you happily kiss her back for some minutes. You're maybe not out for the rest of the world, but your friends and family know about you two.

"Shall we go home?" you ask a little after.

Ona nods and after taking the time to say goodbye to the girls who have not left yet, you find the fresh air of the Barcelona nights. As you are just next to your appartment, you choose to crash here for the night. Ona being a little smaller than you are, she would wear one of your shirt for the night.

You smile when the spaniard grabs your hand to walk, arching an eyebrow.

"I’m not sure being like this gonna keep people from suspecting that something is happening between the two of us, Love."

Ona shrugs, looking at you from the corner of her eye.

"Well maybe that way people will stop imagining that you’re dating that B team guy."

She pretends to throw up and you can’t help but laugh. That was like two weeks ago for a gala, you posed with this boy for a simple photo and Twitter practically caught fire. So did your secret girlfriend’s jealousy. Your parents are conservative, so you’ve never talked openly about your sexuality. That probably played a big part in this case.

"You know you have no reason to be jealous"

"Yes. Still."

You smile once more and kiss her cheek before crossing the road. From that moment on, everything seemed to be idling. The headlights of a car approaching too fast, the squeaks of the tires and the terrified cry of Ona after the impact. You just had time to take her in your arms and push her out of the way of the car. That's the last things you can remember.

******************

When you wake up, you can't feel anything, but in a good way. You can't open your eyes either, but you feel like you're floating. Remembering a conversation you had with Ona while looking at the stars on her balcony, you make the decision that you are simply lying on a cloud. As the time pass, you begin asking yourself what you are doing on this comfy cloud. That's when the memories came back and first you wonder if Ona is safe. You heard her scream before going numb but it wasn't a cry of pain, physical at least.

And then, you wonder if you are dead. But if that means you saved Ona’s life, is there a better way to die? Probably not.

You feel something a little bit after, that surprises you, even makes you panic a little. Something touches your hand and you feel your heart racing. Strange, for someone dead right?

"What's happening?"

Man this voice, you could recognize it between a thousand, even distorted by anxiety like now. It's Ona's voice.

"Looks like she’s reacting to your touch. That’s pretty good."

You don't know this one, but if she can make feel Ona better, you like her already. The tonality make you imagine an old lady, with grey hair and glasses. Ona stay silence after but you can feel her fingers gently caressing your hand.

"I don't know where I can touch you without hurting you more" she mumble, making you wonder what you look like.

******************

You get bored and wonder what would happend if you just let yourself fly higher. If you let go. So you let yourself go and you start to feel lighter and lighter.

Until you were punched in the chest, brought back to your cloud.

The force of the blow cuts your breathing briefly and a new voice, which you also know very well, sounds in your ears.

"Oh no, don't you dare do that. Not now that I finally managed to convince your girlfriend to come home, shower and change."

Well excuse yourself Miss Putellas but what the hell are you doing on my fluffy lovely cloud? That said, the firmness of her voice changes you a little bit from the sweetness of the one Ona is talking to you with. So you stay on your cloud until your lady comes back. She does a little later, after a door slammed.

"What the hell happened?"

You feel her hands touching your face as Alexia’s voice explains in the background what happened, explaining that everything is fine now.

******************

Time fly again and you wake up in a middle of a conversation. Ona is here once again and you realise that she's talking with her mom.

"I'm so mad at her" you hear Ona say.

"I understand. But I'm more grateful. She saved your life."

You can perfectly picture the scene, Ona in her mother's arms while she gently rocks her. Ona's mother as always been affectionate, even with you. You were at first surprised by the welcome hugs, but it's kind of nice. Your parents aren't really fond of the life you choose, being gay and a football player, so you don't really catch with them a lot. But it's ok like this for you.

"What am I gonna do if she doesn’t wake up Mama? I can’t live without her"

Ona’s voice is choked, meaning she must be crying. And it makes you want to do it too, or at least make her understand that you are still there and that you can hear her. But you don’t know how to do it, even opening your eyes seems impossible. Thanks god, her mom is here.

"She will wake up, Ona. Your story isn't finish now."

A silence passe only interrupted by Ona’s sniffs.

"Your brother is here"

"But I told him not to come" Ona frowns.

"As if he was going to listen to you. He knows you need him and you are as stubborn as each other."

A new silence comes, smaller this one.

"Will her parents come?" Ona's mother ask.

"No. They said they’d come when she woke up. Not sure I’ll let them in though."

While Ona seems angry with this information, you're not really surprised. Like you said before, your parents aren't really supportive of you. Their only daughter did not really meet the expectations they had. You haven’t seen them since Christmas two years ago, last year you spent it with Ona and her family. As for the summer holidays, you preferred to fly away to rest in the sun with your friends and Ona. In any case, they themselves did not mention a possible meeting.

******************

Time has continued to stretch, but you have no idea how long you have been there, floating on your cloud. What you do know is you’d like to know how to get back to your people. You have daily visits, Alexia, Ona’s parents and brother, your teammates and obviously Ona who seems to camp by your side.

Ona talks to you often, makes you listen to music or keeps you informed of your condition. You apparently have bruises all over the place, four broken ribs and a dislocated shoulder. With serious head trauma, but contrary to the doctors' fears, you have no cracks in your skull. You were relieved to learn that you had nothing on your legs. That way you will return to the fields easier.

Alexia tell you about Ona, usually being there when your girlfriend leaves your bedside to take care of herself. Alexia encourages you to come back to Ona, explaining how much she needs you. She sometimes adds that she also wouldn't mind to have her bestfriend back.

Others, like Ingrid, Aitana or Lucy, stay here in silence, but their presence are great too. Some of them take your hand too, usually Ingrid. You hate being alone but you have to admit that you really rarely are. Even Laia flew back from Manchester for some days, wanting to be here for Ona.

******************

"Today is our birthday"

Ona's voice is sweet as always but the information startle you a little. The day of the accident, you still had two weeks to think about a memorable day for your girl. You already had the gift, but not the rest. You had not imagined that so much time had passed since.

"I found the necklace, I didn't mean to but I was looking for one of your hoodie and the box just fell on the floor."

She speaks quickly, as if she expected you to wake up and scold her. Once again you can easily imagine the expressions on her face, the way she would look her shoes and the slight reddening on her cheeks. Instead, you feel your heart swell with love for her a little more. And the bip of the monitoring - that you’ve been hearing for some time now - seem to want to transmit the information to Ona by accelerating a little.

She's closer now, you can smell her shampoo as she gently strokes your hair. When she talk again, her voice is a whisper.

"The necklace is beautiful, but I promise you’ll never have to give me anything again if you wake up today. I want nothing but your presence by my side. I miss you so much."

You miss her too, you have to admit. You miss hugging her, kissing her or watching her like the creep you are while she's sleeping.

So this time, you try to open your eyes, with all that you have. It take some time, Ona keeps talking, but you can’t focus on what she’s saying and the efforts you’re making at the same time.

It takes you some time, but you eventually succeed.

Everything is too bright suddenly and you close your eyes immediately. The hum of Ona’s monologue stops instantly and you hear the sound of a chair rattling the floor. But you try again, this time long enough to allow your eyes to get a little better at the ambient light. You feel the mattress sag at your waist, before your eyes can finally focus on the one thing that really matters. Ona’s face.

She looks at you too, looking too stunned to speak.

"Nice necklace" you mumbling, your voice hoarse and broken from not being used for two weeks.

Ona kind of broke down, bursting into tears and lying half on you, her face buried in your neck. You slowly raise your arm - your muscles all seem numb - to caress her hair.

"You're awake"

You hear Ona repeat this phrase several times, before she gets up to look at you again.

"You're awake" she says again, this time while looking at you.

"I love you" you prefer answering, focusing of what matter for you. Not being able to say it back for so long was kind of frustrating.

She smiles between her tears and kiss you with all the love and tenderness she have. You reciproque the kiss as well as you can, and just when Ona pulls back you hear the door of your room being open.

"They didn’t have the coffee you like anymore, I hope it fits you. They’re all filthy in this hospital anyway" Alexia grumbles without looking in your direction.

"Well hello to you too Miss Putellas" you said.

Alexia turns in your direction so quickly that you wouldn't be surprised to learn that she have a stiff neck. The surprise made her drop the cup of coffee she was holding in her hand and it took her a few more seconds to rush to the two of you.

And for the first time since you are here, you hear Ona’s laughter ringing in the room.

[jennay]

Let me take care of you

Request: I don't know if you know, but Noah kind of lost his voice during a concert(?) when you can, can you write that the reader flew out to take care of him or just to be there with him? :c ♥️ You choose whether they're friends or in a relationship, whatever you feel. Don't overwhelm yourself, precious; we love you more♥️♥️

No warnings

An: sorry I put a friends to lovers trope. 😅 thank you for this request. I loved it.

Words 2800ish

Noah Sebastian x reader

Noah Master list

You had always been terrified of heights. The mere thought of being high up in the air made your palms sweat and your stomach churn.

So, how you boarded a plane and flew for more than half a minute was a mystery to you. But you did it for Noah, your best friend, who was going through a rough patch. Your sneaky self conspired with the other three men to visit without Noah knowing.

He'd lost his voice and had to cancel several shows, which made him feel guilty and depressed.

He kept blaming himself for not taking better care of his health even though the others assured him that it was not his fault and that he would recover soon.

You had booked a car online, but when you got to the rental center, you faced an unexpected problem. The vehicle you had reserved was unavailable, and the counter clerk seemed clueless about what to do. He asked you to wait in the lobby while he talked to his manager, promising to sort things out as soon as possible. You felt your blood boil with frustration. You hated waiting - especially when you had paid for something in advance. You glared at the clerk as he walked away, wishing you could zap him with your eyes. You grabbed your phone and dialed Noah's number, hoping to check on him. You waited for him to pick up but heard a different voice on the other end instead.

"Hello, this is Noah's assistant. How can I direct your call?" It was Jolly; his thick accent and cheerful tone always made you smile.

"Hey, Jolly. It's me." You chuckled. "Is Noah paying you well? You seem to be working very hard lately."

He laughs back, "He doesn't pay me shit! I'm just that good of a friend."

"Well, speaking of the devil, where is he?" You ask.

"Sleeping... I saw it was you so I answered for him. Are you here yet?" He whispers, and you hear the sound of a door closing. "Sorry, that was loud. I don't want to blow it. Must escape into the other room." He says, giggling like a child.

"I'm in the same state…city even, but there seems to be some fucking confusion with the car I rented, and it's taking everything in me not to lose my shit right now," you say with a sigh. "Why is this happening?"

You run your hand down your face, feeling lost and not knowing what to do. "Ah, the classic 'I rented a car, and now I'm stuck' situation. You know what they say: 'Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans.'" He quips, "Do you need someone to come get you, or are you going to wait it out?"

"OK, well, nobody says that except you. I'm gonna wait. I hate not having my own way around." You pause when you hear your name called at the front desk.

He laughs, "No, I'm pretty sure that's how it's said, y/n. My English is good."

You roll your eyes, letting out a small giggle. "I gotta go. I'll call you when I get to the hotel. Like, I'll actually call your phone."

"See you soon. OK, this is the part where I say goodbye, right?" He laughs.

"Yes, goodbye!" You click end and start toward the desk, wondering how you ended up with the strangest people being some of your closest friends.

After a long, exhausting drive, you finally arrived at the hotel's parking lot. You took out your cell phone and called Jolly, hoping he would come down and help you with your luggage.

You waited and waited and waited…

"I'm coming." He said abruptly and hung up.

You stared at your phone in disbelief. What was that? Did he just cut you off without even saying goodbye? What if you had something important to tell him?

You got out of the car, putting on your sunglasses. You grabbed your backpack from the back seat and closed the car door, leaning against it as you waited for Jolly to show up.

You started to doubt your decision to come here; if Noah was sick, would he appreciate your surprise visit? You shook your head; of course, he would.

You feel excited when you see the tall Swede walking towards you with a goofy smile; he opens his arms wide, and you run to him, hugging him tightly.

"You made it!" He exclaimed.

You pulled away, grinning, "Barely. I think I only cried once on the plane, so that's an improvement, " you joke while adjusting your bag. "Lead the way," you say, gesturing to the door.

"Someone's eager," he teased, opening the door. "I'm excited to see everyone. I miss you guys so much," you said with exaggerated emotion.

He followed behind you as you sprinted up the stairs. "Oh, come on. Don't lie to me. You're dying to see Noah... Just admit it," he said, poking fun at you.

You stopped in the hallway, making him bump into you. You turned to face him, poking his chest and giving him a fierce glare, "Shut your mouth!"

He laughs, gently grabbing your shoulders, keeping you at bay. "Alright, pitbull, calm down!"

You shake your head and continue to walk, "Sorry." You mumble. "It's just, nobody needs to know that. I honestly didn't even want to tell you." You take a deep breath when you feel his arm lazily drape over your shoulder.

"Maybe it's time to tell him instead of telling me." He looks down at you, waiting for a response.

"Hear me out... I can just not say anything and keep my friendship intact," you say.

Jolly's arm drops from your shoulders as he points to the door. He grabs his key and unlocks the door, pushing you in first.

"This place is huge," you say as you peek around. You'd barely entered the kitchen and already felt lost.

"Down the hall doors on the left. Beware, the other two are lurking and waiting for your arrival," he warns.

As he's warning you, you hear a sudden commotion from around the corner. Two figures emerge, dart guns in their hands, and they laugh maniacally as they start shooting at you. You barely have time to react before the first dart hits you in the face. You instinctively raise your arms to shield yourself from the barrage of incoming darts.

"Fucking assholes!" You yell out in frustration, trying to catch your breath as you choke on your laughter. You quickly scan your surroundings for cover and spot Jolly nearby. You run towards him and hide behind him, hoping that he'll provide some protection from the incoming fire.

Jolly groans as he gets pelted with the soft bullets but doesn't move. You peek from behind him and see that the men are still laughing and shooting at you.

From behind them, you hear a door creak open and feet scruffing against the floor.

"What the fuck is going on?" you hear Noah's hoarse voice ask.

You poke your head around Jolly's torso, and your eyes land on Noah. You smile with excitement, feeling your stomach flip.

You run past Nicholas and Folio, flipping them off in the process and laughing hysterically as you jump into Noah's arms. As you cling to him, you can feel his body tense up in surprise. He looks down at you with wide eyes, his mouth slightly agape, as if he can't believe what happened. You can tell he hasn't processed that you're there yet.

"What the…where did you? You're here," he manages to stutter out. His body relaxes, and he squeezes you gently, engulfing you in his tattooed arms. "What are you doing here?"

You pull back, still latched in his arms, as you look up at him. "Surprising you, dummy. Did it work?"

"What do you think?" His brown irises glow while he gazes down on you. "I'm surprised, but why? You had the whole tour, and you chose now? We're almost done." He says, chuckling. "Wait, did you get on a plane?"

You push out of his grasp, brushing your shirt down. "I heard you weren't feeling well…and yes, I did get on a plane."

"She only cried once," Jolly pipes in. "She's growing up so fast."

You shake your head, "...and then these two assholes tried to kill me." You glare at them. "You didn't even say hi! You just started blasting, and I find that rude. Could at least greet a girl." You turn your back to them, swinging around to face Noah. "Anyway, I'm here."

He looks back at you with tired eyes, "Well, as much as I love seeing you. I'm supposed to be on vocal rest. I'm going back to my room."

You stand there confused as he starts to walk away from you.

"Are you coming?" He asks, stopping before his door.

"Wait, you were inviting me?" You chuckle, "I'm comin'." You dash down the corridor and join Noah in his room. The room is plunged into darkness by the black-out blinds. You grin as he snuggles up on the bed, pulls the covers over him, and switches on the tiny TV on the desk at the foot of the bed.

"I had to make it dark." He explains, noticing your curious gaze, "I'm fooling myself into thinking nothing exciting is happening."

You roll your eyes playfully, "Nothing exciting is happening. This is a hotel." You tease, sliding under the covers next to him.

Noah gives you a sly smirk as he slides closer to you, resting his head on your chest. You wrap your arm around his shoulder, gently moving it up his neck and into his hair, where your fingers weave through, making him melt under your touch.

"I know you're not supposed to be talking, but I was curious how you feel about this. How are you coping?"

He lets out a sigh, showing his frustration. "I hate having to cancel shows, you know? It sucks knowing people were looking forward to seeing us maybe for months, and then we can't even show up." He buries his face in your neck, groaning, "I can talk, by the way, just not loudly."

You feel his hot breath against your skin, causing goose bumps down your arms. You wonder if this was the right time to tell him the truth.

You mentally shake the thoughts from your mind; now was probably not the right time. You didn't know if there ever would be a time when you'd feel brave enough. "I get that. As much as you hate hearing it, you're only human, Noah. Shit happens, and I'm sure they'll understand. They would want you to get better instead of ruining your voice," you remind him.

You feel his arm drape around your waist as he says, "I'm happy you're here. It makes things a little more manageable."

You hear his breathing slow down, and his soft snore comes from him. You let him rest and grab your phone, careful not to wake him up. You take a quick picture of your situation and send it to Jolly.

Help

Did you tell him?

NO.

Wake him up?

I can't. It's a rule. It's rude to move if someone is sleeping on you.

That only applies to cats, and Noah's not a cat.

You laugh and text back: Are we sure?

You put your phone down beside you and close your eyes, feeling the need for a nap after your long trip, and then you'd talk to Noah, maybe.

You stir in your sleep, feeling soft touches through your hair; you cuddle closer to the person's chest, feeling arms around you keep you safe and warm. Your eyes flutter open softly, and you are greeted with Noah's neck tattoo. You lean your head back, your nose grazing Noah's chin. "Hi," you groggily say.

"Hi, sleepy head." You snuggle your face back into his chest, not wanting to end the moment. You felt secure and calm, like you could stay this way forever. Until you hear the door fling open, you don't raise your head to look afraid you might get pelted in the face with another dart.

"You did it!" Jolly squeals when he sees you wrapped up in Noah's body. "I'm claiming best man at the wedding!"

Noah's eyes widen in confusion, and he looks at Jolly with a puzzled expression. "What wedding?" He asks nervously.

Jolly stares at you wide-eyed and yells, "Ah Fuck!" before leaving the room and shutting the door quickly.

You smack your hand over your eyes, wishing you could just disappear. Your cheeks burn with embarrassment, and you contemplate getting up, walking to the front, getting on a plane, and never showing your face again.

Suddenly, Noah lightly pushes your shoulder and playfully smiles at you. "That was weird," he says. "Are you OK?" His eyes grow with concern as he realizes the color hasn't returned to your face.

You take in a deep breath and close your eyes. Your heart races with anticipation, and you feel sick to your stomach. But you quickly regain focus and open your eyes. "Is it THAT weird?" Noah's head tilts, eyebrows furrow together, and his voice laced with curiosity, "What do you mean?"

"The voice in my head is screaming not to tell you because I'm so fucking afraid of losing you, but I know…" you pause, trying to catch your breath. "I love you, Noah, but not just in a hey, I want to be your friend kind of way. It's been eating at me for a while now. I made the mistake of telling Jolly; that's why he said what he did."

Noah's mouth drops with surprise, and slowly, a smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. "I know," he says softly. He presses his lips together, not sure what else to say. He wasn't completely oblivious. "That's it?" You nervously bite the inside of your cheek.

"Y/n, why do you think I treat you like I do? I knew there was something more, but I didn't want to push this on you. I'm gone a lot, and I can't always give you what you want and what you need." He reaches out, holding both of your hands with his.

"If you want to give me a shot, I'm ready, but don't want to disappoint you." He flashes his infamous smile at you. "I want to try. At least then when people ask if you're my girlfriend, I won't have to correct them." He nervously laughs, "Are you ready?"

You smirk and sit up on your knees, bringing your hands to his face and pressing your lips against his. You lean back, gazing into his eyes, a permanent smile plastered on your face. "Yes, I'm fucking ready!"

You hear Jolly's voice yell from the hallway. "The wedding's back on!"

You chuckle, and Noah pulls you into his lap, kissing your temple. "He really wasn't the best one to tell."

You shrug your shoulders, "It wasn't that bad…he did kinda make this happen…"

Noah looks at the door hearing someone lean against it; chuckling while throwing his legs over the side of the bed and making his way to the door. He quickly opens the door to reveal Jolly practically falling on his face.

"Dude…" Noah laughs. "What the fuck."

Jolly apologizes, "Sorry, sorry. I'm nosy, you know plus had to make sure little miss wasn't getting her heartbroken." He pauses and smiles at you.

"Well," you say with a grin, "I guess we can't blame him for being curious about our love life. After all, it's not every day that he gets to witness such a steamy romance." You wink at Noah.

Noah rolls his eyes playfully and pulls you closer. "Yeah, Jolly," he says with a smirk, "you're just jealous that you're not getting any action."

Jolly laughs and shakes his head. "You two are something else."

Tags:

@thisbicc @yumikitten @lma1986 @chemicallady

[penny00dreadful]

Brain worm! 🪱 Just a lil silly somethin written in a daze.

Eddie had to wrench the wheel back so he didn't run the fucking van into a tree.

Did he seriously, seriously just see what he thought he just saw?

As soon as there was a gap in the road Eddie swung the van around and pulled into the gas station he had just passed, trying to keep as low a profile as possible.

Which was no mean feat considering the state of his catalytic converter but once he'd pulled up into a dark corner, a glance in the wing mirror told him he hadn't been spotted.

It also told him that, yes. He'd been correct on his initial passing glance. He was actually seeing this shit.

Eddie glanced down at his clothes. Ripped up jeans, his 'Hell Awaits' Slayer t-shirt depicting a giant inverted pentagram, demons and hellfire, chains, rings, leather jacket, battle vest, boots.

Yeah, he looked sufficiently scary.

Night was starting to fall around him so he still went unnoticed as he slid carefully out of the van and made his way over to the two lone figures just barely lit up by the harsh artificial exterior lights.

He planted himself just behind, what looked like, some middle class dad type who was standing just a little too close for comfort.

Eddie crossed his arms and spoke to the second figure barking out in the lowest tone of voice he could muster.

"Just what the fuck do you think you're doing, young man?"

The middle class dad whipped around. The second his eyes landed on Eddie he had a look on his face like the devil himself had just manifested behind him.

Without a second of wasted time he scampered away, tail between his legs, leaving Mike Wheeler standing there, wide eyed, pale faced and terrified.

Good.

"Edd-" Mike swallowed, slowly backing away as Eddie advanced. "What are you doing here?"

Mike's back hit the wall and Eddie took one more step forward, looming over him. "You don't get to ask questions, Wheeler. You get to answer them. Now I'm only going to ask this one more time: Just what THE FUCK are you doing out here?"

"N-nothing! We were... I was just-"

There was a clatter and some hushed expletives before the rest of The Party appeared around the corner.

"He's not here alone!" Dustin shouted, apparently under the impression that that was going to calm Eddie down in any way at all.

"And you think that makes this better, does it?"

"Yes! Safety in numbers!"

"There is no safety in whatever the hell I just witnessed!" Eddie exploded. "There is no safety in being at a remote gas station on the outskirts of town at night and talking to strange men for whatever reason!"

The kids all looked to be in various stages of shock, clearly not expecting Eddie to lay into them so fiercely but he didn't care. He refused to feel bad for them.

"Tell me, oh braniacs, what would have happened if someone had come along and snatched Little Wheeler up, huh? Would you have chased after the car on your bikes?" He sneered. "How would you have contacted anyone? How long would it take someone to get here? What if one of you had been attacked? Or robbed? Or murdered? What would you have done then?! How could you all be so stupid?"

"It's not stupid! We weren't being stupid!" Dustin shouted back. "We have our walkies-!"

Eddie laughed, cold and mean and so, so angry but Dustin continued to dig his own grave.

"You all never let us try anything! You never give us a sip of beer or a smoke or any of your weed which we know you still have-"

"Watch it, Henderson." His voice was low and dangerous.

"So we were just trying to get someone to buy something for us, that's all!"

"Oh that's all? That's all, is it? And you have money to pay for this purchase?"

Dustin scoffed. "Of course."

"So tell me, what would have happened if someone went in there and bought you your beer but then decided that wasn't payment enough? What would you have done if he started asking or demanding something else?"

"Like what?"

"Oh I don't know, what could a grown man possibly want with a fifteen year old little boy?" Eddie shook his head. "You know what, I'm not having this conversation out here. Get in the van."

"But... our bikes-"

"GET IN THE FUCKING VAN, HENDERSON!"

Eddie observed in stony silence, his face thunderous as the kids all loaded their bikes into the back of the van before they scuttled in themselves, quiet and cowed.

He slammed the drivers side door closed before turning his key in the ignition and pulling out of the gas station, the silence in the car suffocating, bouncing off the walls.

"Um..." They were nearly halfway back to Hawkins by the time Will's small voice cut through the air. "You're not going to tell our parents, are you?"

Eddie looked back at him in the rear view mirror. The kids were all watching his reaction with worry and Eddie refused to drop his anger in the face of Baby Byers. Not this time. Not for this. He had to stay angry because if he stopped being angry he might just lose himself in what if's.

"No. I'm not going to tell your parents."

The kids all sighed in relief, somehow still believing they were being let off the hook.

"But I am going to tell Steve."

The explosion nearly shook the van. The kids were all screaming, begging, nearly crying not to tell him.

"No! No, Eddie, please!"

"You can't tell him, he'll kill us!"

"Yeah, then he'll bring us back from the dead just to kill us again!"

"You can't do this to us!"

"You know what he's like, Eddie! You can't sell us out to him like that!"

"I can and I will!"

"Can you... can you- shit. Can you please tell him, like, gently? So he doesn't freak the fuck out? He's your boyfriend, he'll listen to you!"

"You all are in no position to be asking for favours right now." Eddie brought the car to a stop in the Harrington driveway. "So here's how it's going to go. We are going to go inside. You are going to tell Steve exactly what just happened. Then the two of us are going to explain to you exactly why what you all just pulled was so monumentally dangerous. Whatever he decides to do with you all after that is up to him. He is your babysitter. You all bestowed that title on him. I am just the babysitter's boyfriend. It's out of my hands."

"Oh, but... you could be our babysitter too?" Dustin tried, a clear and pathetic attempt to make the incoming shitstorm go smoother.

"Not a chance, Henderson." Eddie hopped out and made his way around, throwing open the back doors of the van and gesturing to the now open front door where an extremely distinctive swoopy haired silhouette stood. "Go and face your fate."

[notjustjavierpena]

Firstborn

Series Masterpost | Main Masterpost

A/N: A silly little piece for a silly little author, who wanted to have more of husband!Javi and The Peñas. This is a follow-up to Fever!

Summary: It’s early in the morning when you go into labor with you and Javier’s first child.

Pairing: Javier Peña x Reader/You (No y/n)

Tags: Sfw, pregnancy, angst, non-explicit descriptions of labor, love!!!

Word count: 2.1k

Link to this work on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/48493402

Firstborn

Your water breaks at 03:48 AM on an early Sunday morning. You know this because your initial thought is to check the clock on your nightstand, too tired to register why you’ve woken up and briefly thinking that you have wet the bed. You’ve had contractions on and off for a few days, but this marks something new, something real and exciting and oh God, soon something extremely painful too. 

Still being slightly disoriented from sleep, you reach between your legs without thinking much about it. Immediately, you shoot up from your lying position until you are sitting, suddenly very awake and aware of what is happening when a contraction starts at the base of your spine. Yep, definitely more painful than the ones you have had up until now.

Javier feels your movements, blinks awake as slowly as you had just done, but then does the same thing as you; stirs, realizes and widens his eyes. He looks to you, swears under his breath, and nearly falls on his face as he stumbles out of bed, because he accidentally forgets to untangle himself from his covers. 

“Now?” He just asks, ending up on the floor nonetheless. He sits on his ass, awaiting your answers. You can see the slight redness in his face from his pulse having quickened, giving away his nervous state. 

“Now,” you nod. You have a brief moment where you curse the fact that he will have to take you to the hospital in this state; clumsy, nervous, boyish and excited. Then you remember all the other things too: Caring, loving, supportive, serious and absolutely in love with you.

“Right,” he rubs a hand over his face as if collecting himself, smooths his thumb and forefinger over his mustache before fighting to get off the floor despite the thumping in his chest. He also somehow looks a little paler than usual, but powers through anyway, “Let’s get you out of the door, momma.”

“Javi,” you get helped off the bed with only a slight struggle of keeping your balance, placing a hand on your belly afterwards to soothe your child who seems eager to let you know of their arrival.

Javier is frantically stuffing useless things in the bag that has been packed and ready for weeks, and you take a deep breath when he shoves three extra towels in there. You’d be fine with it if it wasn’t for the anxiety creeping up the back of your neck at what is about to happen, “Javi.”

“Yes, amor?” 

“Just take the fucking bag and let’s go. It’s packed. It’s been packed for a month. They have towels in the hospital,” you waddle towards the door, “Javi, let’s go.”

*

You know that you are over-prepared with a bag; stuffed toys, beanies, pacifiers, onesies, candy, apparently a million towels. Yet in the car, between contractions, you realize that you are in no way mentally prepared, because you start to feel absolutely terrified at the idea of going into actual labor. 

You keep it together during the car ride though, afraid of Javier losing focus of his driving on the main road if you start to hyperventilate from being scared instead of in pain. It’s already hard enough to tell him to have his eyes front when you feel your whole pelvic floor start to cramp horribly, holding on for dear life as you breathe through the pain.

“Almost there,” he reassures, knuckles white on the steering wheel.

You want to turn the car around and go back home. 

*

You arrive at the maternity ward twenty minutes later. The latest contraction came as you were walking across the parking lot and nearly knocked the wind out of you, so when they finally get you a bed in your very own hospital room, you can feel relieved tears prickling at the corners of your eyes. Javier is sweet, and has gotten you ice water and a chocolate bar from an overpriced vending machine, but he nearly drops both when he sees you crying as he enters the white room again.

Softly, he says your name and rushes to put everything down on the bedside table to empty his hands. He stands by your side, and you smile weakly at him until your bottom lip starts to tremble and your facade starts to crumble. 

“¿Qué pasa? Do you need a nurse?” He tries to seem calm for you, but his nervousness bleeds through. You know him better than anyone, and you can see that he is worried. You want to let him know that he doesn’t have to be, but you’re filled with anxiety as well.

“No need for a nurse, she’ll come check when she thinks it’s time to check,” you say through a few tears.

“What then? What’s happening?”

“I’m—“

Then another wave of pain hits you. This time is stronger than ever, causing you to groan loudly, holding onto the bed for support and trying to breathe through it. 

Javier watches you nervously, looking at the call button for a moment and then back at you. 

“Don’t call,” you say through gritted teeth. The pain gives you something to blame the tears on since you feel quite silly for being scared of something you’ve prepared yourself for, for months, and so you let yourself sob once and then twice as you wait for the contraction to fade out again. 

“You want something to drink?” Javier asks, picking up a cold rag from a bowl on the table. He gently dabs your forehead, sneaks down to tap away the flowing tears as well, “Chocolate?”

“No,” you pant as the cramping sensation passes. Your whole body relaxes into the bed again, grip loosening and your eyes fluttering closed, “I just want this to be over.”

“You’re so brave, momma,” he says with a little smile, replacing the cold rag with his hand instead. He runs it over your hair soothingly, repeating the action over and over, “And a fucking badass too. Not scared of anything.”

“Javi,”

“No no, it’s true,” his voice is usually enough to calm you.

“Javi, I’m terrified,” you confess and then immediately burst into more tears. You turn your head away to avoid his eyes from where you are lying down, feeling the tears run down over your cheek and into your hair, “I’m already exhausted. What if I can’t do it? And what if I’m hurting the baby? What if I’m going to be a shit mom?”

Javier is silent for just a moment, holding onto the bed’s railing and tapping it anxiously with his fingers. He opens his mouth to say something but then hesitates just as he is about to. 

“Say something so I know you don’t agree,” you sniffle, heart pounding in your chest.

“Agree?” Javier’s tone is a little more high-pitched than usual, but he clears his throat to bring it back down again, “Of course I don’t agree, amor. We’ll figure it out, yeah? The baby-thing? We always do, and you’ll be the best momma out there.” 

You dare to turn your head to face him again. He looks perfect; eyes soft, smiling down at you with an expression that tells you it’ll be okay. 

“And I’ll be right here until he’s here, ain’t gonna be one of them fainters now, am I?” He jokes, drumming slightly on the railing, “Not even if you break my wrist. I’ll even allow you to do that.”

“He?” You ask. He comes down to kiss you and then you watch him push himself back to stand upright, going to put a straw into your ice water and holding the cup up to your face. You take a sip.

“I don’t have hard proof right here, but I just know it’s gonna be a boy,” he looks a little embarrassed as he says it, but you just love him more. He sets down the cup again, takes your hand afterwards, “You can do this, and I’m not going anywhere.”

*

“Javier F. Peña! You! You did this to me! Fuck you!” You spit his name venomously as you endure yet another contraction, which has become more intense and frequent by now. You have been scooted to the edge of the bed, legs in the torture instruments they call leg supports.

Javier looks like someone who is about to turn on their heel to run off in the opposite direction of danger. He doesn’t though because as much as your eyes are wild, they are also full of tears. He stays by your side, holding your hand as you continue your scarily accurate impression of the girl from The Exorcist. 

“Alright,” your midwife says, “I think it’s time to push, contractions should become less intense but more frequent.”

“You think it’s time?” You yell loudly through a contraction. Javier says your name softly.

“I know it’s time,” she corrects herself, “You got this, mom. When you feel the next one, you give me what you got, alright? I’ll count down with you.”

You whimper as you nod, but at least you can see light at the end of the tunnel, and so you give it your everything and more until Javier is nearly brought to his knees from you squeezing his hand. 

“Fuck!” You swear through your teeth and throw yourself back into the mattress to catch your breath. Your hair is wet and your skin is glistening from sweat and tears, making you sob from the exhaustion that has completely overwhelmed your body. You shake your head rapidly as you pant, “I can’t do it. I can’t— I can’t do it, I’m sorry. I don’t want to. Please, I don’t want to.”

“We’re almost there, almost,” your midwife encourages, but you just feel naked and sweaty and tired. She keeps going, “Just a few more pushes, I promise.”

Javier kisses your damp hair as you cry, holding your hand tightly. When he draws back, he finds your eyes, “I’m right here, amor. Just a few more, hear that? C’mon now.”

“I can’t do it,” you sniffle but it just turns into more wreaking sobs.

“If anyone can, it’s you, baby, it’s you,” he presses another kiss to your hair, shifting his hand to entwine your fingers and gently squeezing, “One more push. Please. For me.”

“O-okay,” you hold his gaze, bottom lip nearly splitting in half as you bite down on it when another contraction starts.

“5, 4, 3, 2, 1…” Your midwife counts out loud.

It is in fact just one more push, and then you hear the cry of a newborn fill the room. Everything has been worth it, you decide in an instant, and whatever pain you’re experiencing is numbed by the insane amount of happy chemicals flooding your tired form. 

“It’s a boy,” the midwife says and through heavy eyes, you can see Javier tense up at the mention of the sex, “We got a name?”

“Lucas,” you and Javier say at the same time. 

It takes them a moment to wipe Lucas down and cut his umbilical cord, but when you feel the weight of his tiny body on your chest, you start crying all over. He cries in your arms, searching instinctively for food and you sniffle quietly as you admire your creation.

“Hello you,” you say weakly as he suddenly looks you in the eye, “Oh my God, look at him. I made him.”

Lucas Peña. Nothing but a mess of dark hair, tiny hands and feet, and somehow such a strong resemblance to his father despite being so new and frail. 

Javier is silent beside you, and you’ll never say it out loud, but you have forgotten he is there for just a moment. It’s only when he clears his throat that you realize how strained his voice is, cracking for just a split second as he tries talking.

“He’s perfect,” he sniffles, daring himself to reach out and run a knuckle down the infant’s back, breath hitching in his throat, “You did so fucking good, mi amor.” 

Lucas wiggles a little under Javier’s touch, small fingers moving in the real world for the first time. You force yourself to look up at your husband to see his reaction, but you’re scared you’ll miss the tiniest thing that your baby does.

“I love you,” you smile tiredly. Javier leans down to kiss you ever so gently and it’s like a permission, a promise that everything is under control of his unconditional love for the both of you.

You can feel your eyes starting to close at that despite knowing not everything is over just yet. You’ll take the chance of resting for just a few minutes. 

Besides you, Javier is trying his damn hardest to suppress a sob. He does manage, but only until he gets to hold his first- and newborn son against his chest for the first time.

[chelseachilly]

i watched it begin again

pairing: reader x ben chilwell summary: ever since your last relationship ended badly, you've lost all hope in love. until your best friend convinces you to go on a date with her bf's friend ben warnings: none word count: 2.7k

author's note: this is just a short little something inspired by one of my favourite songs, begin again by taylor swift ❤️ and bc the thought of a first date with ben is just so perfect to me 😌

-

As you sit in an Uber on your way to Marylebone, fidgeting nervously with the hem of your dress, you can’t help but wonder how you got here.

It took a lot of convincing - to be precise, three glasses of white wine, some chocolates, and the agreement to watch your favourite movie on Netflix that night - for your best friend to convince you to go on this date last weekend.

Mia, one of your closest friends since you were kids, knows better than anyone how reluctant you’ve been to return to dating life ever since your last relationship ended catastrophically. Your last boyfriend, Jack, who had also been your first serious one, had completely broken your heart eight months ago. 

After two years together, just when you were beginning to think about taking the next step and move in with him, you caught him cheating on you with in his flat with a coworker he had sworn was just a friend. You were so completely devastated by this betrayal and the sudden end of your relationship that you haven’t so much as downloaded a dating app or talked to a guy at a bar since. 

Your friends have been loving and supportive of your decision to stay single for a while, but ever since Mia started seeing her boyfriend Harvey a couple months ago, she’s been pestering you to meet one of his friends. She’s told you several times that his mate Ben is perfect for you, but based on the little you know, you’re not sure you agree.

She showed you his Instagram a while back and, although there’s no questioning that he’s quite attractive, you don’t know if a fancy, famous footballer is the right choice to ease back into dating. You doubted that you would be his type, either, but when Mia insisted that Ben was interested and free this Thursday, you finally gave in. 

You figured the worst that could happen is you realize you’re not ready to date again or that there isn’t a connection between you and you wasted one evening having dinner with a stranger. 

But now that you’re sitting in this car, about to go on an actual date for the first time in forever, you feel like you might explode with nerves. You don’t remember how to flirt, how to tell someone about yourself, how to act cool and composed. You could be totally awkward and weird and he might never want to see you again. 

Or, even worse, you could fall madly in love, only for him to end up breaking your heart. That’s the far more terrifying possibility.

You have half a mind to ask the driver to turn around and take you back home, but you force yourself not to. Mia would be upset with you, and you figure you owe it to her not to stand up Harvey’s friend for no real reason.

Your hands are shaking slightly as you get out of the car and enter the restaurant. You consider waiting outside for him, as you’re a couple minutes early and he probably isn’t here yet, but it’s freezing out right now, so you decide to head in. 

“Hi, do you have a reservation?” the hostess asks you, and you nod a bit shyly. 

“Yes, it should be under Chilwell? But I’m early, so I can just wait-"

“Right this way,” she says with a smile, motioning for you to follow her. 

It’s a small restaurant, with no more than ten tables, most of them occupied. There are candles burning and soft music is playing, the atmosphere somehow romantic without being cheesy. 

You feel slightly more at ease knowing it’s not some insanely posh place like you were half-expecting it to be, and then you lock eyes with your date. 

Your stomach erupts with butterflies - something you also weren’t quite expecting - when you see him, immediately realizing that the photos Mia showed you did not do him justice. 

He’s gorgeous, with bright blue eyes that light up when he sees you and wavy dark hair that you could spend hours running your fingers through. He quickly stands up as you approach the table, smoothing out any wrinkles in the dark blue trousers he’s wearing, paired with a black knit jumper and Nikes.

You can hear Mia’s words echoing in your ears: “Harv swears he has a heart of gold. He had a bad breakup last year too, so you’re in the same boat. Just give him a chance and see how it goes!”

“Y/N!” Ben smiles, greeting you with a quick hug. “It’s good to finally meet you, Mia’s talked a lot about you.” 

Oh, god, you think to yourself, hoping your best friend hasn’t overhyped you too much. 

“Good to meet you too,” you say, returning his smile. “And that sounds like Mia, she talks a lot about everything.” 

“That’s probably why she and Harv work so well,” he quips.

Ben is still standing quite close to you, and it takes you a moment to realize he’s pulled out your chair for you to sit down. You’re not sure if a guy has ever done that for you before. 

You oblige, taking the seat and letting him push you in before sitting across from you. Something your mum told you when you were a kid about how a gentleman behaves comes to mind, but you try not to let your mind wander too much. It’s been about twenty seconds, there’s plenty of time for him to prove right your current theory that all men are trash. 

“Thanks for choosing the restaurant,” you say to fill the silence, glancing around you. “It’s really nice.”

“Yeah, I come here a lot,” Ben replies. “It’s low key, which I kinda like. Mostly old people and stuff. I was actually just starting to worry you’d think it was a bit lame for a first date.”

“I don’t,” you say quickly. “I’m good with low key.”

Ben smiles at you, and you’re not sure if it’s him or the candlelight making your face feel warmer all of a sudden. 

“You look gorgeous, by the way,” he says a bit shyly. “I should’ve said that sooner.”

“Oh, thanks.” You’re certain now that you’re blushing. “So do you. I mean, you look very - not that you’re not gorgeous, men can totally be-"

You meet Ben’s gaze, your cheeks flushed with embarrassment, but you find no judgement in his eyes - he’s smiling at you even more now, the kind of smile that makes you feel completely at ease.

You just met this man, and yet you feel completely safe with him. 

“Sorry, this is my first date in nearly three years, I’m a bit rusty,” you admit. 

“No, you’re good,” Ben says gently. “Mia mentioned you recently got out of a long-term relationship.”

“Not that recently anymore, but…yeah,” you say. “It was a bit of a shit show. We were together two years and then one day I walked in on him sleeping with another girl. Not exactly an amicable breakup.”

Ben’s face falls. “Oh, I’m so sorry, Y/N. What a piece of shit.”

“Yeah, he really was,” you say, nodding your head. “Obviously, it was for the best, though. Better I find out he’s a lying cheater now than ten years down the line, right?”

“Definitely,” Ben agrees, “you want something to drink?”

After a couple glasses of wine and the most amazing pasta dish you’ve ever had in your life, you feel like you’ve known the person sitting across from you for years, rather than hours. 

You talk about everything - your job, his football career, your families, your friends. You talk about your ex a bit more, and then he opens up about his. There’s a nagging feeling in the back of your mind that you’re sharing too much with him, but a far stronger one telling you that this is right. It’s a feeling you’ve never had before, not with your ex and not on any other first date you had before him.

You don’t even realize how much time has passed until you look around and realize you’re the only ones left in the restaurant.

“They’re probably closing soon,” you comment, though you don’t really want to leave. 

“Twenty minutes ago, actually,” Ben says. You raise an eyebrow, and he scratches the back of his head and smiles. “Uh, I may have offered the owner a hundred quid to stay open a bit longer while you were in the loo. I’ve been having a really nice time talking to you.”

Your heart thumps in your chest, your eyes nearly beginning to water at the gesture. 

“I’ve been having a really nice time with you, too.”

After you finish your drinks and Ben pays the cheque, not even hearing out your offer to split it, you head back out into the chilly London night together. 

“I’m just gonna call an Uber,” you say, pulling out your phone with one hand and rubbing your shoulders for warmth with the other. 

“I’m parked right around the corner, I’d be happy to drive you?” Ben offers. 

You remember that he declined a second glass of wine earlier, stating that he was driving - a stark contrast from your ex, who would frequently call you to pick him and his car up from the pub after he got too pissed to drive home. 

“You really don’t have to, it’s pretty late,” you protest.

“It’s no big deal,” Ben assures you. He then shrugs off his jacket and wraps it around your shoulders without hesitation, putting an end to your clearly obvious shivering. “So you don’t freeze on the way to the car.”

You smile gratefully, unable to articulate with words how much this simple gesture means to you. 

As you walk side by side, you can’t help but admire the Christmas lights already strung up on the shops and houses you pass. 

“I love this time of year,” you say. “It’s so magical.”

“Same here,” Ben smiles. “Christmas in London is the best. Do you have any plans for the holidays this year?” 

Your brain briefly flits back to the ski trip you and your ex went on the past two years right before Christmas. A week ago, you were dreading that time coming, knowing you would end up being nostalgic for those trips and start missing him again, but somehow, that feeling seems to have vanished. 

“Just going home to see my parents,” you say. “You?”

“Yeah, we always have games around Christmas, so my family usually comes to mine and we do a big dinner on Christmas Day, then they come see me play on Boxing Day,” Ben tells you. “After the game, we always go get hot chocolate and go ice skating. My little sister suggested it when she was a bit younger, and it sort of stuck.”

The combination of Ben’s coat over your shoulders and the way your heart is melting at his sweet words makes your entire body feel warmer. 

“That’s a great tradition,” you say, looking over at him with a smile and gently bumping your arm against his. 

You arrive at Ben’s car and he opens the door for you to get in, his hand brushing against yours as you do so, and the brief touch is enough to drive you crazy. 

The drive to your flat isn’t too long, and conversation continues to flow easily between the pair of you. You can’t help but steal a glance at Ben from time to time as he drives, admiring the way the streetlights reflect in his beautiful ocean blue eyes. 

There’s a bit of a pang in your chest when he pulls up in front of your building and you know this is the end of the most incredible night you’ve had in ages. 

“Walk you to your door?” Ben offers, and you nod without hesitation.

He once again comes around to open your door for you - you know you have a low bar right now, but you’re seriously in awe of what a gentleman he’s being. 

Once you’ve arrived at the door to your flat, you turn around to face Ben, and he has a bit of an inquisitive expression on his face.

“I had a really nice time tonight,” he says softly. 

“So did I,” you say sincerely. “Thanks for dinner, and the lift home, and…just, erm, for being so wonderful.”

His cheeks now flushed with red, Ben takes a small step closer to you, and your gaze automatically falls to his lips. You want him to kiss you, you’re sure of it, but some part of you is still completely terrified of where this might go if you do. 

“Can I…” Ben murmurs, tenderly reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, and once again, you don’t hesitate. 

“Yes.”

He slowly leans in until his lips are pressed to yours, one hand gently cupping your face and the other resting on your waist. You hold his hand that rests on your cheek as you kiss him back, your lips slowly moving together in perfect harmony.

It’s fun and new and exciting to kiss him, but mostly, just like everything has this evening, it feels right.

When you pull away, it takes a moment for your eyes to remember how to open. When you do, you’re met with an awestruck grin on Ben’s face that you’re pretty sure you’re mirroring yourself. 

“Wow,” you breathe. “Been a long time since I’ve done that.”

You’re not sure if you mean kissing or falling for someone - perhaps both. 

“Me too,” Ben whispers, kissing you once more. “I think we’re pretty good at it.”

You nod, grasping at his shirt as you find yourself swaying slightly, intoxicated by his kisses and his gaze. 

“Maybe we should do it again to be sure,” you joke.

He wastes no time leaning down to kiss you again, and again, and again until you’ve lost all track of time. 

Eventually, he pulls away and takes a small step back, and you miss his lips already.

“I should probably get going,” he says, though you can tell he doesn’t really want to. You have half a mind to invite him inside, but you know it’s better to take things slow, especially when there’s a chance this could really be something. “Can I - erm, would you want to-“

“Yes, please,” you cut him off with a grin. “Text me when you get home?”

You’re already eagerly anticipating a second date - the sooner the better, honestly, despite your wishes to take it slow. 

“Definitely,” Ben says, nodding eagerly. “Have a good night, Y/N.”

He begins to turn to walk away, and you watch him get halfway to his car before fumbling for your keys and entering your flat with a giddy smile on your face. 

You realize you haven’t checked your messages all night, so you quickly return Mia’s texts. 

You flip down on your couch, still smiling like a fool, and it’s only then that you realize you’re still wearing Ben’s jacket. After panicking for a second, you quickly reach for your phone again.

You nearly throw your phone with excitement, counting down the seconds until you get to see him again and thanking your lucky stars that you agreed to go out tonight.

You thought that love died that terrible day eight months ago, that your chance at happiness was over, but now you can’t help but wonder if there’s a reason things ended the way they did. 

Maybe to make way for something better to begin. 

-

please let me know what you thought, i hope you liked this story! i have some more in the works, including a super fluffy christmas one-shot 💓

[ashcal99]

Collarbones : Jasper Whitlock Hale VII

Chapter Seven

"I can see your collarbones and baby I'm scared, Never thought I'd be so unprepared"

Summary: Camila Johnson was only 16 when she was diagnosed with leukemia. By the time she had turned 17, the doctors had tried everything to save her. Her family is close to giving up hope when they hear of a doctor who may be able to help her. The only problem is, he lives on the opposite side of the country. The small family soon decides to move to the small town in Washington, in efforts to prolong her life. In doing so, her life changes forever.

Warnings: Eventual smut (18+ only), mentions of death, depression, violence, descriptions of disease and weight loss, general angst, slow burn, blood

Words: 6.1k

A/N: Please lmk if you'd like to be added to the tag list. Sorry it took me so long to update, life has been completely hectic. Hope you enjoy x

Soundtrack

Previous Chapter

Series Masterlist

——————

February 5th, 2005

Soft music rung through the otherwise silent cab of Jasper’s car, the gentle thrum of the guitar filling the space between the too occupants. He had put on the music in hopes to help at least partially settle the nerves that were clear as day on Camila’s face. She sat in the passenger seat, spinning the metal rings that hung loosely on the thin fingers of her right hand, a nervous tic of hers that jasper couldn’t help but notice. Her left hand remained in his, the constant touch of their skin being something that they both needed. 

Jasper weaved through the treelined road, forest blurring past as he tried to keep his focus on the drive and not the way Camila had her bottom lip pulled between her teeth. Any normal day, he would use his powers to help ease her anxiety, but that would’ve gone against her explicit request to refrain from doing so. Camila didn’t want her emotions of meeting Esme for the first time to be skewed in any way, no matter how much more comfortable it would make her. 

In truth, she was terrified of making a bad impression. Sure, she knew Carlisle, but she didn’t exactly know him personally. If she really did stand a chance at all of living with these people for the rest of her existence, then she wanted nothing to obscure her perception of them or their perception of her. She had worried all morning, not wanting to come off in any bad way, she had even gone as far as to wear something else besides her normal graphic t-shirt and leggings. 

It wasn’t anything fantastic or impressive, but the dark denim that fit snuggly around her thin waist, thanks to a belt fastened tightly through the hoops, and the simple ivory cotton long-sleeve that she wore under her jacket were far from her usual attire. Despite Jasper telling her that she needn’t worry about impressing his family, she couldn’t help but feel as if it was a necessity. There was a lot at stake. Not only did she care about what they thought of her because of her feelings for Jasper, but she dreaded the idea of them stuck with her for eternity and secretly despising her. She wasn’t about to make a decision that would effect everyone else so greatly without making sure it would be the best for all people involved first. 

Sure, maybe it didn’t help that Edward had already shown his distaste for her, regardless of his reasoning. Yes, Jasper had explained why Edward had been acting the way he had, but she would be lying if she said a small part of her was saying otherwise. Telling her that the immortal teen had a valid reason for his resentful behavior towards her and it was actually all her fault. That same little voice screaming at her that she would make them all be miserable if she did choose to stay with them

Still, despite her nervousness and that pesky little voice, she was actually excited to be officially introduced to his family. With the normal lunches in the school cafeteria being the exception, she hadn’t exactly seen Jasper interact much with his family and the idea intrigued her to say the least. She had really only seen one side of Jasper, the side he was willing to show her, and she couldn’t help but want to see every other side of him that existed. The good and the bad, if the bad even existed in the first place. Though the circumstance was far from a normal teenage experience, this had to have been the most normal thing for the two. 

So, when the car finally pulled up to the house, a modern looking mansion that was covered in large glass panels, her heart had sped up on newfound adrenaline. A mixture of bad and good nerves filled her chest, turning the food that Jasper had been insistent on buying her for lunch in her stomach as her eyes took in the beauty of the sculpture-like home. Jasper’s hand let loose of hers as he flitted at an inhuman speed to open her door for her, gone and then back again in a blur. The same hand was offered back to her, his usual gentlemanly self offering to help her out of the vehicle. 

She gulped, attempting and failing to swallow the lump that was forming in her throat as she took his hand, allowing him to pull her to her feet. His hand remained in hers as he lead her to the front door of the large home. The soles of their shoes crunched against the gravel of the driveway, a stark contrast to the wide smooth concrete stairs that lead up to the entry of the house. 

Jasper dropped his grip on her hand, reaching to pull the large glass door open, gesturing her into the opening as he followed behind her, hand on the small of her back. Camila’s eyes flickered around the bright white walls of the room, eyes wide as she took in the luxurious beauty of the home, small beams of light reflecting off of the various glossy surfaces around them in a soft glow. “Woah.” She muttered, not able to stop herself from gaping at the beautiful artwork that was scattered about the contemporary home. It would be impressive to anyone, but especially to someone that lived in a home like she did. Suddenly, she couldn’t help but feel slightly embarrassed at the state Jasper had seen her room in so many times.

Jasper cleared his throat softly at her side, grasping her attention briefly as he asked. “May I take your jacket for you, Darlin’?” A soft blush creeped onto her cheeks at the nickname, not able to get used to it no matter how often he called her it, as she nodded slightly. Her eyes flickered back to the stunning home as Jasper stepped behind her, gently sliding the soft fabric from her shoulders. Goosebumps rose on her arms as his cool fingers grazed delicately across the thinly covered skin. She blinked rapidly, attempting to keep herself from becoming too distracted by the simple touch. 

“Camila!” A high voice chirped from her left as a blur raced towards her. Chilled arms embraced her frail frame and she told herself that she would eventually get used to Alice and her antics, even if that day was far in the future. Either way, Camila was trilled to except the girl’s friendship with literal open arms. 

A huff of a laugh left the teen’s lips as she reciprocated the hug. “Hi, Alice.” She greeted, the smile refusing to falter on her lips. The arms released their grip on her shoulders as Alice pulled away, smile shinning as bright as ever.

“It’s about time you got here.” She said, giving a pointed look to her adoptive brother.

Jasper rolled his eyes. “I had to make sure she was fed, didn’t I? What kind of a boyfriend would I be otherwise?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at his sister expectantly. The word ‘boyfriend’ had of course sent Camila’s heart racing, as much as she trying to keep it at a steady pace.

Alice scoffed at his words. “I’m just messing with you and you know it. Besides, you know you just wanted more alone time with her, we could’ve fed her here.” She teased, smirking as she turned away, looping her arm through Camila’s as she lead her deeper into her home. 

“Esme is so excited to meet you.” She gushed to the girl, pulling the frail human along with her as she purposely ignored her brothers distaste of the theft of his girlfriend. Camila struggled slightly to follow, forcing her feet to keep up and not trip over themselves as Alice practically dragged her to the living room of the home. 

Her heart thudded along, speeding slightly as she realized that what she had been so nervous about all morning was literally right around the corner. She couldn’t decide if she slightly despised Alice for forcing her into this or if she was thankful, not knowing if she would be able to do so on her own. Either way, the remainder of the immortal family was just a breath away and she was beginning to regret telling Jasper to hold back with his powers. 

As the trio rounded the corner in a decent sized sitting room, the pale beautiful faces of Carlisle and what she assumed to be Esme coming into view. Camila forced her eyes onto the woman before her, smiling shyly back as warmth creeped up her neck. The woman came slowly to a stand, trying her best not to frighten the girl as she beamed a bright smile to her. 

Jasper had been correct when describing her, she had a visible kindness about her, a motherly aura that was obvious as soon as she had stepped into the room. Alice’s touch dropped from her arm, as it was quickly replaced with the return of Jasper’s hand within her own. The immortal girl sent Camila a small reassuring smile, knowing that Jasper’s touch would be able to comfort her much more than her own. She flitted upstairs, deciding that she would find Camila again later when everything would be less overwhelming for her. 

Carlisle perked up, rising from his feet. “Camila, how are you feeling.” He asked, not being able to keep his centuries of being a doctor at bay as he spoke to his patient.

Camila grinned lopsided. “Not bad, all things considered.” She said, figuring that she could be far worse given her circumstance. Carlisle nodded curtly, content with her answer for the time being.

Jasper cleared his throat, gaining the attention of the other three in the room. “Esme, this is Camila. Camila, this is my mother for all intents and purposes, Esme.” He introduced, causing the smile on Esme’s face to broaden as she took the couple in, drinking up the sight of the two. 

The woman walked forwards, stepping closer to the girl as she greeted her tight motherly embrace. “It’s lovely to meet you Camila, Jasper has told me so much about you.” Esme said, causing blood to flood her cheeks as she blushed a deep red at the information. 

Forcing the lump from her throat, she spoke, careful to keep her voice from shaking with the nerves that had long since settled in her chest. “It’s a pleasure to meet you too. You have a beautiful home.” She said politely, trying to focus on the feel of Jasper’s skin on her fingertips. 

Esme’s smile refused to drop as looked around the stunning house around her. “Thank you, I designed it myself.” She admitted, pride clear in her voice. “Although, I do have to admit, we haven’t gotten a lot of use out of some of the features until now. Perhaps you will give an excuse to finally use the kitchen?” She asked, smiling brightly.

“I already took her to get food before coming here.” Jasper informed her.

Esme’s eyes flickered between the two. “Perhaps another time then. Just let us know if you get hungry and we’ll get you something.” She concluded. Jasper’s eyes seemed to stick to Camila’s face as the stress seemed to melt away from her features. Jasper had been right of course, Esme was warm and welcoming, everything that a good mother should be, everything that her mother was. Perhaps she needed more time to get to know the family, but regardless, it didn’t take much to realize that they were all good people with good hearts, especially the woman standing in front of her. 

Esme’s eyes flickered down to the couple’s intertwined fingers, unable to keep the smile from forming on her face. The look in Jasper’s eyes as he gazed at Camila was one that Esme knew all too well. It was the look of love. Something that she had not been sure he would ever find, but was so happy to see that he had. 

It had been so long that Jasper had been alone in life and the sight of him with her was something she couldn’t have ever imagined. The joy that rushed through her heart at the sight seemed impossible. Jasper had been through so much throughout his long life and it was almost hard to believe that he was finally getting a glimpse of the happiness that she knew he deserved.

Carlisle cleared his throat, seeing that his wife’s attention was otherwise occupied. “Jasper, why don’t you show her around the rest of the house?” He suggested, giving the blonde a pointed look. Jasper smiled thankfully at the man, grateful that he had saved the two of them from anymore embarrassment Esme could’ve possibly inflicted. 

Jasper lead the way up one of many staircases in the home, careful to not go quickly as he knew Camila would never let him cary her up the flight. Each room seemed to be more stunning than the last, the sheer beauty and vulnerability of the many glass panes being a lot to take in as it was. 

The house, in all truth, had surprised Camila. She wasn’t sure what she had expected, surely not anything like the dungeons she had seen fictional vampires live in in movies, but defiantly not this. The whole home was void of the tragedies each member of the family had endured and was replaced with equal amounts of beauty. Finally, they came to a stop outside of a door, which Jasper silently opened and lead her inside. 

Camila knew before he even said anything that this was his room. The plush forest green couch along the wall, the rows and rows of books that lined the rest of the space, the overwhelming calming atmosphere, the whole place screamed Jasper. “This is my room.” He said, allowing her to lead him further inside to whatever had peaked her interest most. 

Her feet carried her to the built in shelves that lined the walls with what had to have been close in not a thousand books. Thicker spines in the collection caught her attention first, so she moved forwards, eyes squinting as she tried to make out the titles of the large books. “History books?” She asked, humor coating her voice as a small smirk grew bigger by the second on her lips. 

Jasper stepped closer to the shelves. “Are you going to make fun of me for being a nerd?” He asked in mock offense, unable to keep his growing smile hidden.

A light laugh left her open lips as she turned to face him briefly. “No it’s not that, it just seems… incredibly fitting.” She teased, the smirk growing even larger.

“Now, I don’t know if that means I should be more or less offended.” He said, cocking his head to the side in question. 

“Less, promise.” Camila said, eyes wandering the rest of the room. For the most part, the room was bare, his time obviously being filled mostly with reading. “What do you do for fun around here besides reading history books?” She asked, turning her eyes to meet his. 

“I like baseball.” He said immediately, obviously not needing to put much thought into it before answering.

Camila quirked an eyebrow at the blonde. “Watching or playing?” She asked curiously.

“Both.” Jasper answered.

The curious expression didn’t drop from her face as the admission just added more questions to be answered. She knew for a fact that he wouldn’t be able to play normal baseball given his supernatural speed and strength, and was dying to know all of the details. “How is that possible?” She asked.

“It’s a bit complicated, but I promise I’ll show you one day.” He assured her, happy to see the she had accepted his answer for the time being. “But I do watch games with Emmet and Edward a lot as well.” He continued.

Her smirk returned in a flash, something about his last sentence clearly being very humorous to her. “What?” He asked.

“Oh it’s just very boyish of you, watching baseball with your brothers.” She said.

“Would it humor you to know that I promised to watch the Super Bowl with them tomorrow?” He asked, immediately receiving his answer as she let out a snicker in response. Jasper rolled his eyes playfully. “The goal is to appear as close to a normal human as possible is it not?” He asked, lifting his free hand to tuck a stray piece of hair behind her ear.

Camila smiled, trying and failing as usual to ignore the racing of her heart at his touch. “Oh trust me, you defiantly are far from convincing anyone that you’re normal.” She muttered.

It was Jasper’s time to smirk as a memory popped into the forefront of his mind. “Oh yeah, what was it again? Ridiculously attractive? Inhumanly so?” He teased, unable to stop himself as he saw the blush rise on her cheeks once again. 

Her free hand came up to punch his shoulder playfully, her knuckles feeling as if they hit solid stone. “Shut up.” She muttered, looking down in attempt to hide the growing redness. 

“Why don’t you make me, Darlin’?” He asked, dropping their intertwined fingers and settling instead to wrap his arms tightly around her waist, pulling her the rest of the way towards him, needing to feel her closer to himself. 

Camila wasn’t too sure what pushed her to do so confidently, her usual shy demeanor dissolving quickly away as the seconds ticked by. Maybe it was the overwhelming feeling of being in Jasper’s home, being welcomed as one of the family’s own, or maybe just Jasper and his habit for making her feel like the rest of the world was melting away whenever he was touching her. Either way, it didn’t take long for her to comply and fill the gap between them, wrapping her arms securely around his shoulders, and pushing up on her toes until their lips met in a soft embrace. 

Like usual, despite the cool temperature of his skin, the touch of his lips set her ablaze. Her heart thudded along in her chest at an almost embarrassing rate considering that he could hear all of it. Her fingers reached up from around his neck, curling them in the soft golden curls at the base. She pulled away, ending the delicate touch of their lips all too soon. They stood like that for a moment, just holding each other, foreheads pressed together, just soaking in their presence. 

Jasper was the first to pull away, reluctantly forcing himself to do so as he allowed her to go back to her snooping. Her eyes continued scanning the rows and rows of books, recognizing some as she went, making mental notes of talking points when her eyes scanned over a few of her favorites. One of which had just grasped her attention, her fingers raising to grab the bound pages as a sudden blinding light ripped Camila from her focus, her hand dropping back down to her side.

Curiosity filled her eyes as set them upon Jasper’s face. The light was coming from him. Okay, maybe not from him, but the sun had begun to shine into the windows just to their right, like a cloud had finally drifted past and the light was somehow reflecting off of his skin. She stood there in awe, not sure how exactly to react to the stunning appearance in front of her. 

“This is why you can’t go out in the sun.” She said suddenly as the realization finally hit. “I can see how that would be… distracting.” She admitted, eyes still wandering his skin in awe as she stepped closer, allowing her fingertips to brush the cool skin of his cheek.

Jasper nodded slightly. “That’s why you will unfortunately have to go without me on Monday and Tuesday.” He said, causing an exaggerated pout to form on her lips. “It’ll be okay.” He said, laughing lightly, trying convince himself just as much as her.

Camila’s eyes stayed, glued to his skin as she reached down to grasp his hand in her own, bringing it up to get a closer look at the stunning shimmer of his skin. She couldn’t decide if it looked more like it was shimmering or if it had just caught on fire, the blinding light much like hot flames flickering over his body. She supposed that this must be where the ‘burning in the sun’ thing came from, a now fairly obvious origin of the story. 

Delicate notes filled the air, rolling throughout the open room as the sound thankfully pulled her thoughts away from the upcoming absence of Jasper in the days to come. It took her just a moment to recognize the sound of a piano somewhere within the home. Whoever was playing was doing so beautifully and she was having a hard time focusing on anything else in the moment. 

Jasper, seeing the interest in her eyes, spoke up. “Do you want to go listen?” He asked, not waiting for an answer as his fingers intertwined in her own and he begun to lead her through the hallways. Her eyes widened as they rounded the corner, surprised to see Edward of all people sitting at the large shinny black grand piano occupying the middle of the room. 

She pulled he lip between her teeth, debating for a moment if she should bring attention to herself before realizing that he would’ve already known that they were there watching him play. “You play beautifully.” She spoke out, catching the attention of the brooding vampire behind the keys. 

“Thanks.” He muttered, eyes returning quickly to the song as his fingers danced quickly across the keys. Camila’s eyes flicked up to Jasper, giving him a small nervous smile before dropping his grasp and making her way towards his adoptive brother. Despite the situation making her uncomfortable, she knew it was necessary. The last thing she wanted was any animosity between her and Edward and if that meant that she was the one that needed to initiate any form of friendship then so be it. 

“Do you mind?” She asked gesturing to the space on the bench beside him. He shook his head no, scooting over slightly to make room for her to join him on the seat. She lowered herself onto the plush cushion, rolling her sore shoulders and she positioned her hands over the piano. Her fingertips grazed lightly over the ivory keys, delicately pressing as they went, emitting a soft melody throughout the room. Edward smiled softly, listening as the notes continued one after the other. “Jasper didn’t mention that you played.” He spoke, eyeing her thin fingers as they continued. 

Camila hummed in response. “To be fair, I’m pretty sure I never mentioned it. It’s been a while since I’ve had anything to practice with.” She admitted, thinking back to the easier times she had. Before she got sick. Before everything changed so drastically. Back to when she was just a normal teenager. She had taken piano classes since middle school, but when she had gotten diagnosed, the practicing had dwindled significantly, along with everything else in her life. 

Edward eyed the girl, maybe for the first time understanding the extent of the pain she had been through. The memories that flooded her mind were difficult for her to think of, that much was obvious. He hadn’t exactly gone out of his way to see her side of things throughout this whole mess, but finally being able to read her mind made his entire view point change. 

Realistically, she was just like the rest of them, her life being cut short and now she was being given an opportunity. The same opportunity he had been given, even if she was being given the choice when he had not. Either way, it was not his place to judge her and he knew his attitude had to change. She didn’t deserve his hatred. In fact, she didn’t deserve any of this, but this was the life she had been given. “You’re pretty good all things considered.” He admitted, the corners of his lips curling slightly upwards, finally deciding to show her as much kindness as he could will himself to, still, despite everything, finding the gesture difficult.

Jasper watched from the doorway, happy to see that his brother had finally decided to be kind to his now girlfriend, even if calling her that still seemed like an odd thing to do. Almost too human of thing to do. Camila scoffed. “Not nearly as good as you.” She said, dismissively waving her hand as she rolled her eyes at him.

Edward laughed lightly. “I’ve had decades to practice. I’d say that’s a pretty unfair advantage.” He stated mater of factly. Camila laughed as well, happy to see that the immortal teen was finally warming up to her. Maybe living for eternity with this family wouldn’t be so bad after all. Maybe they wouldn’t end up hating her guts like she feared so greatly. 

Camila let loose a slow breath as her fingers stilled on the keys, attempting to keep the release steady as the pain that ached through her bones seemed to thrum along. Her eyes fluttered shut briefly, trying to get her heart rate to slow back to a steady beat as her head begun the throb. Edward’s concerned voice rung through her ears. “Do you need some water? Would that help?” He asked, his voice seeming miles away as the pulsing pain in her temples increased by the second. 

Camila couldn’t help but feel frustrated with herself, something so simple being able set her off. The concentration needed for playing sending pulses of pain through her temples. The frustration didn’t stop as Jasper rushed to her side, laying a comforting hand on the small of her back as he leaned down, eyebrows furrowed together in visible concern. The pain seemed to slice right through her skull, growing more and more intense by the second as pressure begun to build in her nose. 

Almost in slow motion, the uncomfortable feeling of her nose running started and she watched as a crimson drop fell ever so slowly onto the pristine keys of the piano, splattering over the pale surface. Her hand shot to her nostrils, attempting to stop the mess from getting even worse, but her efforts were useless. The floodgates had opened and blood was steadily pooling down onto the piano and her cream colored shirt. 

Out of instinct, the two vampires held their breath, sure that disaster was just around the corner. Slowly, the realization hit that everything was okay and the bloody nose wasn’t going to cause a complete bloodbath. The realization that her blood really didn’t effect them like everyone else’s hit Jasper, and selfishly, for a moment he was thankful for the cancer that had changed the chemistry of her blood. 

Still, panic filled Jaspers eyes as he took in the scene of Camila covered in her own blood like an image taken straight out of his own nightmares if he could still have them. “Carlisle!” He yelled out, the stress and unease clear in his voice as his hand came up to her nose to pinch the bridge in attempt to stop the sudden uncontrollable flow. 

Edward’s eyes flickered between the two, frustration clear on his face as he stared at the bloody mess. He turned, rushing away in a blur, obviously disturbed by the whole ordeal, but Jasper couldn’t care less. All that mattered was Camila and her safety. Edward’s emotional distress would have to be something for him to deal with alone. 

The man flitted into the room in a flash, immediately going into doctor mode as he saw the scene in front of him. “Jasper, keep the pressure there. Camila, we’re going to take you to my office to see what we can do to stop the bleeding quickly, okay?” He said gently, motioning for Jasper to carry her further into the home. 

In a blink of a moment, there they were, in one of the rooms she had yet to see, but was just as immaculate as the rest of the home. “I’m so sorry.” Camila apologized as Jasper sat her down on the examination table.

“Nonsense, there’s no need to apologize.” Carlisle assured her, brushing off Jasper’s touch on her nose and replacing it with his own. “Jasper, go help your mother clean up, would you?” He asked, looking pointedly in the direction that they had just come from. Jasper knew better than to argue with the man, no matter how much he wanted to in the moment.

It pained him to leave her side, especially seeing her in the condition that she was in. Emotional torment swirled in his head as the realization hit that this had to be a normal thing for her and was nothing compared to what was yet to come. So, he greeted the opportunity of distraction with open arms, rounding the corner and seeing that Esme was already there, wiping up the splatters of blood with a damp rag. 

Her eyes flickered up to his own, not needing to have powers like his own to see the emotional destress. “Oh, Jasper.” She said, sympathy coating her voice. 

Jasper shook his head, refusing to be the weak one when Camila needed someone strong to depend on. After all, nosebleeds were normal right? Despite trying to reason with himself, he knew better. He knew that the amount of blood covering the piano and the floor underneath was not a normal amount. He knew that it would mean something serious for anyone that didn’t already know something was wrong. “I’m fine.” He muttered, grabbing another rag and helping clean crimson covered wooden planks.

Hearing the stubbornness in his voice, Esme knew that pushing the subject anymore was useless, so she decided to move onto something else. “I like her already, you know.” She said, a sly smile growing on her face. 

Jasper couldn’t help the lift of the corner of his lips as he though of her. “I like her too… obviously.” He joked, trying force the spiraling thoughts of losing her from his mind. The pressure of her illness had never been so prevalent in his mind and he couldn’t stop thinking of the choice that she would have to make, the very real possibility that she would say no and soon leave him forever. 

Esme’s heart ached at the sight of her son’s torment. She scrambled, hoping to find the right words to comfort him. “Everything will work out in the end.” She said softly. 

His head hung at her words, biting his lip as he forced his eyes to stay on soiled rag in his grip. “Please, Esme. I know you’re just trying to make me feel better, but you don’t know what she’ll decide. I refuse to make that decision for her or pressure her in any way.” He said, jaw clenched tight. 

The idea had been prevalent on his mind since Alice had told him of her vision of the future, but never had it seemed so close and so damn daunting. He knew it was right around the corner, and the nose bleed hadn’t even been something major, but for some reason, it made everything seem so much more real. So reel that it terrified him more than ever. At every corner he reminded himself that this whole thing could come to an end soon, but that didn’t stop him from growing closer and closer to her by the day. Throwing caution to the wind as he excepted his feelings for her and gave into his own heart’s wants.

Esme sighed, dropping her rag on the floorboards, bringing her palm to lay on his shoulder. “You have to have hope, Jasper.” She said, rubbing her thumb across his shoulder. A deep frown settled on her face as she took in his stone cold expression. “I’ll let you finish up here.” She said lowly, deciding it would be best to leave him to himself. 

——————

The throb behind Camila’s brow persisted as she sat on Carlisle’s exam table. His firm but gentle touch finally dropped from her nose as the bleeding subsided. She looked down, horrified to see her ruined outfit. She wasn’t sure how easy it would be to clean the blood from the cream colored shirt, but had a feeling that her mother would notice her change of clothing either way. 

The dread only increased when her mind wandered to what the scene she had left behind must have been like. Of course, it was just her luck. Her first time meeting the mother of her boyfriend, and she had left a huge mess in her wake. She couldn’t help but be embarrassed, and just when she was beginning to get along with Edward of course.

“Are you feeling okay? Faint at all?” Carlisle asked, pulling her from her thoughts. 

She blinked rapidly, forcing her eyes up from the blood-soaked cotton. “I’m fine.” She muttered lowly, not bothering to speak up, knowing that he would be able to hear her either way. “I haven’t had this happen for a while.” She admitted, thinking back to the stained carpet she had left behind in her last home.

Carlisle sighed, turning as he grabbed a few different things, too quick for her to see before handing the small baggy over to her. “Nosebleeds are very common with your shortage of platelets, frankly I’m surprised they haven’t been happening more often.” He said, giving a soft pat to her knee. “Either way, if you do happen to experience a more severe episode again, there should be everything you need right there.” He said, gesturing to the baggy.

“I’m sure you know all of the steps, but I’ll go ahead and remind you. You’ll want to make sure that you’re seated leaning forward, breath through your mouth and pinch just above your nostrils for ten to fifteen minutes and if it hasn’t stopped by then, come see me. I did pack some gauze in that bag just incase you have a more severe episode again, so Jasper can insert it for you until he can get you to me.” He explained, giving her a reassuring smile.

His smile drooped slightly as he continued. “I’m sure you’re already aware, but these type of things will become more and more frequent as the cancer progresses.” He said. Camila forced a tight smile, nodding curtly. Just another thing to worry about in school, great. 

A soft knocking sounded throughout the room, causing both pairs of eyes to flicker towards the noise. Alice stood in the doorway, smiling her usual smile as she flitted to the duo, acting as if nothing out of the ordinary had just happened. “Come with me, I have a change of clothes you can barrow.” She said cheerily.

Camila snickered softly at her enthusiasm before slowly sliding off of the exam table to a stand and following her retreating figure. 

——————

The events of the day had been cut short after the brief ‘bloodbath’ that had occurred. Esme had refused to except any of Camila’s apologies, stating that there was nothing to apologize for in the first place. Camila couldn’t help but feel embarrassed about the whole ordeal, only having met her for the first time earlier that day and already making a mess of her home. It definitely hadn’t gone as planned, but as expected, Esme was just as wonderful as Jasper had described her. 

After she had returned home, she hadn’t even had to ask before Jasper was crawling back into her window, avoiding being seen by her parents, knowing that Camila would need her ‘emotional support vampire’ after the grueling events of the day. 

As she laid on his chest, fast asleep, puffs of air leaving her open lips, Jasper’s thoughts continued to race. His heart physically ached in his chest as his eyes scanned her soft features. The panic that lingered of losing her reared its’ ugly head as he clenched his jaw, trying to push the thoughts from his mind. As much as he didn’t want to give the idea the time of day, he couldn’t help it. As much he dreaded the topic, he knew that the best he could do would be to promise to love her until her last breath and it would ultimately be up to her if she would stay beyond that.

Next Chapter -coming soon

Tag List:

@jasper-the-beloved @parkchaeyoung1997 @bobaopal @izzyisstuff @itsmytimetoodream @soyeonrai @just-browsing101 @demirunner @dkbj14 @iloveramensm @imyelenasexual @bella7866 @ropickle @may-and-lay @breezybeesposts @emily-a13 @mamajaxx2511 @meyrryme @bertholdtswife @swagcopangeloop @idonotcareaboutyouropinion @honey132 @sakurayuki8655-blog @braveangel777 @illogic-ally @obsessed-with-pychopaths @natsvenom @iamveryholyiswear @too-many-fandoms-tbh @loser-syrus @madeofeverythingjuice @b-tchymoon @steh-lar-uh-nuhs @sabage101 @simon-e-mallory @augustlikesdeath @erissco @harleycao @clacefe @cassieisasimp @mentallyillpansexualtsversion-d @nlr1606 @blacklotus7070 @thisismyblogname5678 @dangerkitten1705 @bomen1807 @greeneyezsblog @jinxxangel13 @mariella-angel-unwin-black @aki-ham @averyasmr4 @midnight-dixon

[pix3lplays]

Crying rn because @fire-lizard-ro proposed something GRAND to me and I had to get it written down-

Um I will probably do more driving hcs for the other characters purely because I can but there was a LOT of discussion about Aventurine and. I need to share it with you guys-

So yeah this is a mix of both of our ideas for him just a disclaimer these aren’t all MY thoughts lol-

Cw! Mentions of Aventurine lore so…spoilers? Bad driving lol please drive carefully, kinda silly lol just…word vomit-Impractical Aventurine being a bad date haha…racism against Aventurine-

-Aventurine driving headcanons-

It’s significantly funnier to consider all this happens on your first date so…it’s your first date with Aventurine-

We were debating what type of car he would have…I don’t know I was leaning towards tacky convertible, they were saying a lifted car-

Doesn’t really matter but the point is he shows up in…an interesting looking car. You can hear him coming because he BLASTS his music. REALLY REALLY loud. You can hear him COMING DOWN THE STREET-at first you think it’s just some annoying teenager but then you hear honking from outside your home because apparently it was impossible for him to just call you-

You dare to look. Sure enough there he is, grinning and waving at you-assuming you even open the door and dare to get in his car then the date can begin…Honestly we wouldn’t blame you if you just didn’t leave your house and just ditched him right then and there-

But yes let us assume you’re brave enough to step out of your home and get into his car-

If he does have a roofed car oh my gosh I can see those tacky neon lights on the roof of his car…oh Aventurine…but you’re trying to be optimistic…maybe this date will be fun?? He seemed like a really cool guy when you met him…but you’re…really getting the feeling that he’s a Bit of a show off-maybe those claims of him being a peacock weren’t that far off…

Apparently he wanted to take you on a nice, romantic drive. Sounded pretty fun, and the sights of Penacony really were something else at night…you could get behind the idea of him just driving you around.

You were kinda embarrassed to be seen in this car though. Look-as soon as you slide into the passenger seat you try to be friendly by saying, “hey!! How are you??” and he can’t hear you because his music is too Stinkin loud-

Finally he takes the hint and turns it down enough so that he can at least HEAR you but…yeah he clearly intended to go on this drive with the windows rolled down and his music blasting…

Oh…oh okay um…that’s fine you guess.

You’re trying very hard to be open minded about this date but…then he starts driving. Uh yeah he SPEEDS, that was a fun little surprise-and not just…ten over…we’re talking like fifty, sixty over…maybe more-

You’re terrified??? Gripping the grab handle for DEAR life because Roro was telling me this man knows how to DRIFT-

Not WELL but he can do it-

And he’s ABSOLUTELY a show off, he thinks you’re going to LOVE it-

You’re genuinely so shocked he’s ACTUALLY driving like this that you don’t even know what to say so he just takes that as yep they’re into it, I’m going to keep this up.

It takes a SHOCKINGLY long time before the two of you are pulled over by an officer.

He looks at you with this smug face and he’s all, “don’t worry babe, I’ve got this.” And you’re so shook from all his wild driving that you’re just kinda like…”um yeah okay…” you’re just glad that it’s over for now-

But he’s Sigonian. Which means he IMMEDIATELY looks suspicious and untrustworthy. After all that confidence now suddenly you’re standing outside of his tacky car watching while Aventurine does the walk and turn test. (Also Roro entertained me with the idea of him just. Tripping. That would be so funny oh my gosh-).

But yes Aventurine is definitely charming-he does eventually talk his way out of a ticket and soon the…pleasant drive continues. And by that I mean you finally turn off his music and tell him to take you home.

To his credit…he does listen to you and take you home.

As SOON as you’re out of the car he’s doing donuts right outside your house, and you’re just watching him hoping he doesn’t wake up the neighbors while debating if you should just go inside and pretend you don’t know him-

He’s already planning the second date…maybe you will actually go on it as long as it doesn’t involve you getting into his car again.

And at least you have…a story for your friends about your date with THE Aventurine.

[some-messed-up-writing-for-you]

Wrong Place, Wrong Friends - Part 3

CW: captivity, implied betrayal.

I want to get back to writing these small stories, so here's a little treat! Requests aren't quite open yet, but they might be at some point soon, so stay on the lookout, I suppose! <3

Part 1 | Previous Part | Masterpost

~~~~

Civilian wasn’t sure how much time had gone by. Had it been minutes or hours? They supposed it didn’t matter in the end as the door of their cell opened once more with a loud creak. They jumped at the sound and tensed as heavy footsteps approached them.

The urge to struggle was strong once the lackeys grabbed them, but the civilian remained as compliant as one could in such a situation, letting themself be dragged somewhere unknown.

Within a few moments, fresh air brushed gently across their face like a long-lost lover’s hand. Gravel dug into their boots as they walked, and Civilian had never been more terrified of the outdoors than in that moment.

Were they being let go?

Were they being “taken care of”?

The frightening thoughts had their knees buckling, and just in time, too, as a car door flew open before them. The goons shoved them in rather unceremoniously, forcing them to lay across the backseats. The civilian’s face dug into the rough fabric until a familiar hand in their hair informed them of what was actually beneath their head.

“Hello again, Civilian,” their captor sounded from above as the car engine roared to life. “Hope you didn’t mind the wait.”

Realizing their face was in the stranger’s lap, a slight flush covered their cheeks, but they dared not pull away. Instead, they croaked, “N-No, it was fine.”

“Good, good!” the other laughed. “Now, can you guess where I’m taking you?”

Civilian gulped, a spark of nervous hope visible in their tone. “B-Back to my house…?”

“Yes, actually,” their captor unexpectedly confirmed. “You were unlucky enough to get tangled up in some… business I had with that “friend” of yours.

“My men didn’t find anything linking you to them, so I have no reason to keep you. You don’t even know what I look like, after all.”

“I-I see…” they stammered. “...Or hear, I guess.”

The risky joke earned them an amused snort, and the fingers in their hair continued lightly scratching at their scalp. It was almost soothing. Almost.

After a short moment of silence, Civilian’s captor suggested, “You might want to find some better friends after this.” They paused to hum in consideration. “Unless, of course, you like when people knowingly throw you into danger?”

“N-Not really a fan of that, no…”

“So I thought.” They twirled a strand of hair around their finger before tucking it back into place and clipping something to it. “Ah, would you look at that?”

The car drew to a stop. Civilian’s nerves shot through the roof once more as they were pulled up into a sitting position. The rope around their wrists was swiftly undone, and the door at their side opened.

Once they were ushered out, they couldn’t help but stand as stiff as the concrete under their feet. Many possible and terrifying outcomes raged inside their mind, but all were ultimately silenced by the stranger’s voice whispering in their ear.

“Now, once I let go of you, you’re going to count to fifteen,” they ordered, idly toying with whatever they had attached to Civilian’s hair. “And once you’ve finished, then you can take the blindfold off. Understand?”

The civilian mutely nodded, their throat feeling too tight to respond; fear of facing the barrel of a gun once their eyes opened still lay heavy on their thoughts.

With a satisfied hum, their now-ex-captor left one last pat atop their head and got back in the car. As they sped off into the distance, Civilian made sure to count extra slowly before shakily raising their hands and uncovering their eyes.

To their blissful relief, nothing but the door of their house filled their sight. And after a few nervous look-arounds, they fumbled with their keys and got inside. Their mind felt numb as they locked the door and wandered off until somehow finding themself in their humble little bathtub.

They blinked, barely bothering to question when they had gotten there, and instead pressed both palms against their face. A shaky sigh left them before the tears came back with a vengeance.

Despite their previous slight breakdown, they still had plenty of “stress juice” left in them. Time drifted alongside the salty tears now mixed in with the bath water until it turned cold. The late hours of the night traded places with dawn.

Somewhere outside, a bird made its presence known in the nearest treetops. The air filled with pleasant singing, and Civilian finally dragged themself out of the bath and into bed.

Work and other adult responsibilities be damned - they needed a fucking nap.

[worksby-d]

Pairing: Chris Evans x actress!Reader

Summary: You're becoming tired of sneaking around with Chris, but he's very protective of you and your relationship.

Warnings: None

Word count: ~800

. * ✦ . ◍ ∘ . * ✦ ‧ ∘ ⊹

The time flashing back at you from your dashboard is taunting you as each minute passes. It's not like Chris to be so late, so you try to give him the benefit of the doubt assuming something important is keeping him, but it's not long enough of a break to begin with. You'd rather not lose anymore time.

You guys have found lunch breaks in your cars have been the answer to getting any alone time during long days on set, always too tired for anything more at the end of the night. It works out though – It is the easiest way to keep your relationship to yourselves for the time being.

Giving him three more minutes, you finally pick up your phone to send a quick text. “Where are you?”

But at the exact same time, you receive the same three words from him, followed by, “My car today, remember?”

Letting your head fall back against your seat, you let out a deep breath. “No, I don't remember,” you mutter to yourself. You opt for just sending back “Shoot, one minute” though.

When you finally make it to him, you silently slip into his passenger seat and lean over to give him a quick kiss.

He can tell you're being quieter than usual though, watching you fiddle with the bag your sandwich is in instead of actually eating it.

“Please eat.” His voice pierces the silence as he reaches his hand over to take ahold of yours, lacing his fingers between yours and squeezing softly to make sure he's gotten your attention.

“I'm not hungry.”

“Yes, you are,” he says. He knows you didn't eat breakfast this morning because you were both running late after you spent the night at his house. “Please don't be mad at me.”

“I'm not mad at you,” you sigh, turning toward him more so you can rest your head on his shoulder. “I'm mad that we have to sneak around.”

“I mean…” He pauses to think about it. “We don't have to. I just want to protect you.”

“I know.” At first you were terrified of what being with him would mean, never having been in a relationship with another actor before, let alone one whose personal life is so dissected. He promised he'd do everything he could to keep it private for as long as you wanted though. “Maybe I don't need protecting anymore.”

“No, I know you don't need it,” he assures. “But I don't wanna lose you.”

He doesn't see the sad smile those words put on your face, but you hold his hand tighter and put your other on his arm to hug yourself closer to him. You know his history–past relationships affected by the negativity that comes with being public.

“The car lunch dates aren't fun anymore?” He tries to deflect with a joke, gently elbowing you.

“Not when I lose track of whose car I'm supposed to be in,” you laugh. “It's so complicated when it doesn't need to be.”

“I get it.”

Sitting back up, you toss your sandwich off your lap. You figure it's your turn to lighten the mood, so you carefully move to share his seat with him, climbing over the center console to straddle his lap.

“Hey, see,” he smirks, hands falling to your hips. “I, for one, think this is fun.”

You just shake your head, letting him pull you in for a kiss. Your makeup will need to be touched up, but you're always prepared to explain you messed it up while eating.

Breaking away from him for a breath, you have to place your hands on his shoulders to keep him from following.

“Easy,” you scold playfully. “We lost time today.”

“I'm sorry about that.” He manages to steal one more quick kiss. “It was probably my fault.”

“It always is,” you joke.

But you go quiet again, grabbing his hand again so you can play with his fingers–a nervous habit he picked up on very early in your relationship.

“I wanna hold your hand outside of our cars. And go on dates outside of our houses.”

A sympathetic smile graces his face, pulling you closer again, just for a hug this time. “We’ll come up with a plan, okay?”

“Yeah, before we get caught this way one of these days,” you chuckle, suddenly remembering where you are, cautiously looking out the window to make sure still that no one is around.

“We won't,” he swears. His genuine tone comes to an end with a wink though. “My windows are tinted, baby.”

“Okay, hotshot,” you laugh, rolling your eyes. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

. * ✦ . ◍ ∘ . * ✦ ‧ ∘ ⊹

Tag list: @chris-butt @patzammit @denisemarieangelina @thummbelina @pppsssyyyccchhhiiiccc @princess-evans-addict @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @la-cey @turtoix @katiew1973 @harrysthiccthighss @tvckerlance @bluemusickid @rocketrhap3000 @mrspeacem1nusone @murdcox @geminievans1 @doozywoozy @americasass91 @dwights-new-plague @wwwmarissa92 @redhairedfeistynerd @whxre4cevans @aubreeskailynn @white-wolf1940 @melchills-j @xoxabs88xox @just-one-ordinary-fangirl @before-we-get-started @chrissquares @christowhore @ice-dtae @mariestark @justile @rogersbarber @dilfbarber @livstilinski @payperhearts @vintagestarlight @gitasor @chaeycunty @miss-ariella @bemysugarbean @t-stark35 @seitmai @reginaphalange2403 @raelorns21

[daenysx]

HELLO! i'm so happy to share this with you, i really hope you like it. uni kinda messes with my head but i'm hoping to keep writing, it really helps me distract myself. i love you all, thank you for being patient with me ♡

"hello?"

"i think your boyfriend's gonna kill me."

"you mean your brother?"

you can almost picture aegon frowning as he holds the phone and talks to you. he must have done something to annoy aemond, now he's calling you. classic.

"for the record, it's not my fault. i didn't do anything, he just got angry for no reason."

you smile, knowing that's not true. "are you sure?"

"yes. maybe. he needs to be nice to me, okay? i'm older than him."

"yeah, but why don't you say this to him?"

"wha-have you seen him getting angry? he can actually kill me, my life is in danger right now."

you huff quietly. "what can i do for you?"

"thank god, you finally asked. okay, he is in his office now, can you come here to take him out for lunch? we have a lot to do, and everyone here is stressed out because of aemond."

"everyone? i thought it's just you-"

"yeah, literally everyone. they are terrified that he's gonna snap again and we need a peaceful hour without him, please? just make him go back to normal, calm him down for the rest of the day and i'll get you your favorite wine-or a car-whatever you want."

you nod even though he can't see you. "fine, i'll be there in 15 minutes."

"thank fuck."

you do as you promise, 15 minutes and you see aegon's figure. you wave at him, he exhales with relief when he sees you. "he's inside."

you smile, knock the door. you hear aemond's stern voice, "aegon, don't even bother to come in, i'm not gonna-" he stops when he sees you by the door, wearing a pretty sundress. "can i come in?" you ask with a sweet voice.

he stands up, leaves his chair. "of course, sweetling, don't even have to ask."

he opens his arms for you, and you wrap your arms around his waist as he holds you close. he inhales the scent of your hair, and you are more than happy to be surrounded with his air. "i wasn't expecting you."

you take a step back, his hands in yours. "i thought i'd make a surprise to you."

"mhm, that's not the truth." aemond targaryen can be a human version of a lie detector, other than the fact that he knows you so well.

"aegon called. he is afraid you'll kill him." you say with a chuckle. "where is your tie? you left home wearing the black one."

he huffs, "i threw it out somewhere. he made me so angry, do you even know what he did-"

"no, i don't, but you can tell me all about it when we're having lunch."

he cups your cheek. "baby, it would be perfect, but there are so many things i have to do, he made a mess of everything i've been working on."

you look at him with a hopefully charming look. "please? don't you have just half an hour to spend with me?"

you know it's working with the way his lips curve into a subtle smile. you kiss his chin, his bottom lip. your hands cover his neck, his shoulders still stiff. your hand finds his hairline on the back of his neck and you scratch his scalp with your nails, knowing how much he likes it.

"you're too tense." you whisper as you kiss the skin under his ear. "let me distract you."

"i thought you offered lunch. if you keep kissing me like this, we will be doing something else."

you shrug, lips curved into a sly smile. "anything works for me, handsome."

he kisses your forehead and looks back at the papers he has to work on. he leaves your side for just a second to close his laptop and put the papers neatly on the table. he takes his phone and comes back to you, a hand on your waist as he leads you outside.

aemond doesn't spare a single glance at aegon as you leave. you can swear his assistant takes a deep breath when she sees you walking out of the office. aegon winks at you, you offer him a slow smile. it's funny how everyone in the office is intimidated by your boyfriend when you know he's an actual sweetheart for you.

he pushes you against the side of his car when you leave the office completely. there's no one else in the parking lot other than you. aemond cups your cheeks and kisses your lips without breathing. "have i told you how pretty you look in this dress?"

you shake your head with a shy smile. he pushes your hair back from your face, thumb rubbing the highest point of your cheek.

"that's a shame." he kisses your upper lip. "you look so pretty, making me forget about everything just by showing up at my room."

"just wanted-" your breath catches in your throat as he kisses the tip of your nose. "just wanted to make you feel better."

"yeah?" he asks. "you're the best thing ever happened to me, hear that? a perfect girl, only for me."

you decide to try something else. "do you think you could skip going back to work for the rest of the day? we can spend some alone time after lunch."

he pauses for a moment, presses his forehead against yours. "i think i can do that."

you get excited for having your boyfriend all to yourself for a day. "really?"

he smiles at your cheerfulness. "of course. anything for my girl." he kisses your forehead. "also i don't want to see aegon's face again for today."

you smile. "i know you're mad at him but we should be grateful for him calling me. thanks to aegon, we'll have all day to ourselves."

he chuckles like you make the funniest joke. "yeah, all thanks to aegon."

[lilalexchaos]

Original fanfic

Oneshot

Enjoy!!

_____________________

A loud noise started screaming beside Crowleys bed. The demon slowly woke up and figured out that his phone was ringing. He didnt bother to open his eyes and grabed the phone.

"Who in the hell is this? D'you have any idea what hour it is?" He hissed sharply into the phone.

"Oh Crowley, I'm so glad you're awake!" Said a very familiar voice at the end of telephone.

"Angel?" Crowley mutterned something abstrusely and rolled over on his back.

"Crowley, were you sleeping? Did i wake you up?" Asked the Angel in worried tone.

"No... er- 's fine. Ehh i'm awake. What is it Angel?"

"You see... I somehow found myself being on the edge of London. And here's this awful weather-"

"Wait you just like suddenly poped there or what?" He opened his eyes and checked the window. Sky was all dark and trees were bending unther the strong wind. Suddenly a lightning crossed the sky.

"Of coruse not, you know, i was on something, doing some blessings at orphanhouse here..." his voice was nervous and he spoke quickly. "I've got stucked there for a bit longer than i originally planned."

At the moment, Aziraphale was actually crouching in an old phonecell covering himself from terrifying storm, whom he was actually scared of. It was fortune he knew Crowleys phone number by memory.

There was a sound of thunder and Aziraphale gasped of fear.

"Got it... err, 'you all right Angel?"

"Yes-yes absolutly."

"You're scared of storm."

"No i'm not! Even if out here it seems rather scary... you know i just wondered... there are no cabs in the area-"

"I'll come for you, don't worry."

"-Oh-oh thank you Crowley that would be very lovely of you" he said as if it wasn't where he was trying to get.

Some strange noises came from phone.

"Crowley are you there?"

"Err yep, just getting dressed." Another thunder came out of phone. This one was much louder than the previous one. Angel gasped. Crowley was sure Aziraphale was afraid. There was something wrong with his tone. He knew his nervous angel and that he need something to calm him down the sooner the better.

"You want me to stay on phone with you Angel?" It was the only thing that came to his mind.

"Oh- that would be very kind of you."

"Right, I'm coming. Give me 20 minutes. Or err could make it 15." Mutterd Crowley more for himself than for Aziraphale.

"Crowley! please, drive safely!"

"Yeah all right all right whatever..."

Crowley quickly grabbed an umbrella and made his way out from his flat. He ran across rainy street to his car, opening it with a snap of his fingers. He started the bentley and the car left the street.

He heard Aziraphales heavy breath.

"Angel, are you sure you're all right?"

"Yes I am perfectly fine." Said the Angel While his voice cracked.

"Right." Crowley have known this tone of voice and also that the Angel wasnt perfectly fine at all. He started to worry. He wanted to help him but didn't know how.

"Err so, at that orphan hostpital, what exactly were you doing there?" He tried conversating.

"Oh nothing special. Just had to heal one child thats all."

"You stayed there 'till half past two in the morning just to heal one child? Thats nonsense."

Aziraphale mutterned something chaoticly.

"Look Angel, I can see you're not fine. Tell me whats happening."

"I'm fine Crowley, really, nothing to worry about. Absolutly tickety boo." Said Angel quickly.

"Aziraphale, please, tell me what's happening," he tried softly, "maybe I can help."

"You're helping Crowley."

"Alright. Didn't wanna do it this way, but if you won't tell me what's going on, i'm going to push down that pedal and i'm going to be there in ten minutes."

"Crowley! Alright alright..."

■ ■ ■

"So you healed them all? And you miracled that families will adopt them?"

"Yes. -you aren't actually driving too fast are you?"

Crowley gave a accelometer quick eye and slowed down a little.

"Nope."

"Heaven told me to heal only one, I shouldn't do that. I just- I couldn't help myself." Now the Angel was sobbing softly in to the telephone. Crowley did speed up a little at the end.

"They-they are just children. I-I know heaven has great planes for them but I don't suppose they're here on earth... they are ... innocent they don't deserve this."

"I know Angel, I know, they don't. You know about Almighties plans, misteriou and..."

"Innefable"

"Exactly. Maybe this was a part of it?"

"What if not? It certainly wasn't! What if I ruined their lives?" The storm was getting louder and Aziraphales voice began to shiver.

"I just- they don't have anyone. They're all alone in this world. They deserve somene who would love them."

"Yeah... guess you're right. Angel, I'm here, don't go out of telephone cell."

Suddenly the bentley appeard at the road. Aziraphale would swear (if he did ever swear) that since he called Crowley, it hadn't passed more than 15 minutes.

Crowley stepped out from driver seat with an umbrela above him and ran through the rain towards the cell. Aziraphale oppened the door.

"Crowley-" he sobbed. He looked at him as a frightened puppy who got lost.

Crowley grabbed him by his shoulder and pulled him towards him. He wrapped his arms around his back and hold still an umbrela beyond them.

Angel was a bit surprised by this. It was so lovely thing for a demon to do. He grabbed Crowleys jacket and burried his head in his chest.

"It's alright now Angel, don't worry, I'm here." He said gently and stroke Aziraphales back with his hands.

Angel didn't try to hide tears anymore and started crying. But he didnt feel embarrased. He felt completly safe. He felt he can do and say whatever he wanted to without being judged (too badly). He didn't feel safe with other angels or in Heaven. He felt safe with a demon. The demon he trusted more than anyone.

He felt the warmth of his demon, his soothing breath on his hair, as his chest went slowly up and down.

"You're an Angel, you can't ruin anyones life. Almighty will change Her plans and take care of them. Isn’t that what She prommised them?"

Angel sobbed softly into his chest and hugged him tighter. So did Crowley in responce.

A loud thunder screamed nearby. Aziraphale shuddered.

"Right," Crowley pulled away a bit, "let's go home."

Angel nodded. Crowley held an umbrella above Aziraphale as he get into the car, then run around car and sat at drivers seat. Aziraphale was wiping his tears and trying to cope up.

"You want me to change weather for you?"

"Oh no dear, I feel perfectly safe now thank you." Responded Angel avoiding eye kontact.

"Alright i'll take you home then." He said as he started the Bentley and they set off.

Aziraphale smiled a little as an agreement.

"Actually, my place is closer, we can go there if you're okay with it."

Aziraphale smiled at the -we-.

"It doesn't matter where we go, I just want you to be there with me." He said almost whispering.

Crowley turned his head to look at him, but didn't say nothing. He just looked at him, his yellow eyes were stuck at him with so much love and care, that shouldn't be in any demons eyes. Maybe with a little surprise. He than faced the road again and gently took alohld of Aziraphales hand.

"You feel like home to me too Angel. You did for ages." He said.

Aziraphale fighted the urge to say Crowley to drive carefully with both hands on wheel, but instead took Crowleys hand into his and squeezed it softly.

"You did the right thing, if you ask me." He said after a while. Aziraphale faced him. Crowley was still concentrated at the road.

"You know, with families, loved ones..." he stroke his hand gently and Aziraphale felt sudden hot wave rush through his chest.

He wanted to say Crowley so much at the moment. How he felt about him, how much he loved him. How much he appreciated everything Crowley was doing for him and thank him for all the care he had for the angel. But he only managed to say:

"Thank you my dear. I really do hope so." And gently squeezed his hand.

[luveline]

what abt rockstar remus and reader start chatting over the phone and he invites her to a party the band is having perhaps? sirius n james see them together n tease remus maybe (goodheartedly) smthn like that :] also i love ur writing i’ve been following for months now n i literally all of it is always so good never read anything i didn’t thoroughly enjoy from u

thank you so much you're LOVELY!! part two to this but you don't have to read it ♡ fem!reader | 1.3k words

When Remus had asked you over the phone if you wanted to go to a party, you'd said yes before really thinking it through. 

"Cool. I'll send someone." 

His nonchalance had further disturbed you. Talking to him over the phone is terrifying. He's a hard guy to read when he's sitting right across from you – over the phone feels like slow torture. You'll say something and the line will go totally dead and you'll pull back the phone to check he's still there and catch the end of a laugh. Then he says something stupidly nice, like, Fuck, you're funny, and you have to stop from throwing your phone across the room. 

The driver Remus had sent for you has to give your name at the front gate, which is ridiculous. Then he pulls into a driveway big enough for thirty cars, which is more ridiculous, and it's over capacity by double that, all sports cars' worth more money than you'll likely ever see in your entire life. Famous people's parties are insane, to put it lightly.

You linger in the back seat, wondering if you're going to throw up. 

"Is everything okay?" The driver asks. 

"Do you… You don't know whose house this is, do you?" 

"Mary McDonald's," he says knowledgeably. "Mr. Lupin is waiting for you inside." 

You take it for what it is, a dismissal. "Right. Sorry. Thank you," you tell him as you climb out. 

He has the kindness to roll down a window. "You'd do well to be careful. Celebrities are… a different breed to us," he says cryptically. 

You watch him pull away in horror. 

This is where it would be great to call Remus, only your phone had died in the car and everything is starting to feel like a total disaster. Through the open door you can see that the house is teeming with people and movement and sound, lights and drinks.

There's two huge bouncers manning the door. You approach the one with the clipboard though you're seriously considering turning around and walking home. 

You give him your name and he stares. "With Remus Lupin." 

He looks skeptically to your side. 

"I think he's inside," you squeak. 

The guy checks his list and evidently finds you because you get nodded in. 

It's worse once you're actually past the threshold. You've never seen so many people, so many people with so much money. It's clear in everything about them. Designer clothes and perfect hair and better bodies. You feel a little sharp pain of nerves every time you remember whose house this is. 

You see a flash of familiar hair and decide to start there. Through a moving crowd of people and shoes that crush your toes to the living room, where Sirius Black stands to the side with an actor you're intimidated by and said actor's model girlfriend.  Your two seconds from spinning on your heel when he locks eyes with you and grins. Really grins. 

"Hey! Sweet thing!" You freeze. He gestures with his hand. The way he does it, like he's entirely unused to gesturing his hand and not having the person cede his command, is both hot and infuriating. Rockstars, you think wryly. 

"Hey," you say, not loud enough. He gets it anyway. 

"Now how are you here? We have met before, right?" 

"Right. At Devys Centre." 

"Right…" He squints and points his glass toward you, his drink sloshing over the edge. "Not stalking me, are you?" 

You're suddenly so grateful to him you can't speak. His arrogance, while charming on him, is huge, and it makes you laugh. Your shoulders relax, your jaw softens, the stress of being here and not knowing anybody fading just slightly. 

"No, I'm not stalking you." 

He steps closer and he smells like expensive cologne, like fake leather worth enough money to look real, like cognac worth a thousand a bottle. 

"Then why are you here?" 

"She's here as my date," Remus says from behind you. 

Which is not what he said on the phone. The word date was never mentioned. Its clarification emboldens you, has you beaming as you turn your head to see him. You've talked over the phone, sure, but that's only been a couple times a week for two weeks, and you only ever met him one time. There's no guarantee that this is going to work. That he even wants you. 

"Hey," he says, as if he's said it a hundred times before, as if you're familiar. 

You really want this to work. 

"Hi," you say, smiling softly. 

He dots a friendly kiss over the apple of your cheek and his hand grasps your shoulder lightly as he turns his gaze to his bandmate. His fingers are long. The press into your skin and the pressure is awfully nice. "Where's James?" Remus asks.

"That's what I'd love to know," Sirius says, smooth. He suppresses a smile badly. "I didn't realise we'd be seeing you again," he says to you. 

"Go bother somebody else," Remus says. He talks with a casual boredom that Sirius is obviously used to. 

"I'm gonna go find Jamie," he says. It's a promise of something but you don't know what. 

As soon as he moves Remus is taking his hand from your shoulder. You spin in place to face him and find yourselves very close, his dark brown eyes trained on you, moving a little less than amicably over your figure. 

"You look amazing," he says. 

You should say the same. You'd managed to forget how good looking he is. You are sorely reminded. 

"You too," you say pathetically.

"I tried to call you half an hour ago." 

"Sorry, my phone died." 

"No, don't be. I was worried maybe this wasn't the best place for a first date. I'm not trying to scare you off so quickly." 

You smile and rub your lips together, gloss sticky as you say, "I didn't know this was a date." 

"Is that okay with you?" he asks. 

His voice enamours you; the lilting cadence of his concern and the genuineness of his question is endearing beyond words. 

"Yeah, it's okay." 

He smiles and brings a hand to your face, stroking your cheek with the broad of his thumb just once before you're interrupted. 

"What's he look so chuffed about?" a loud voice asks. 

"Baby's first groupie," Sirius says. 

"Don't be fucking disgusting," Remus says. There's a quiet heat there that twists your chest. 

"Groupie as in enthusiastic," Sirius corrects himself, winking at you as he appears at one shoulder. 

A second presence at the other. "Hi, shortcake. What's a girl like you doing in a place like this?" James Potter asks jokingly. He inclines his head at Remus, who, to your astonishment, seems to be blushing. "With this vagabond?" 

"A girl like me?" you ask. 

"Jesus christ," Remus mutters. 

You catch his eyes and smile at him until he smiles back, hoping to reassure him though you're not sure what for. His expression softens. 

"That's bad. That's really bad," Sirius says to James like you're not there, endlessly amused. "S'like I'm watching you and Lilykins."

"Like looking in a mirror," James sing-songs.

"I'd assume there was much less contempt on our front," Remus says. 

James protests loudly and enraged whilst you repeat the word 'our' to yourself, grinning. Our, as in us, as in there's an us, no matter how small it might be.

"Do you want a drink?" Remus asks you over the low din of his friends.

"Sure." 

Remus holds his hand out and you take it. He has big hands. His fingers fit through yours like they were made to. You let him drag you to a kitchen full of too many celebrities to count. He only looks at you. 

[fel0ny-01]

Anyway, continuing from my month hiatus I am here to give you: 141’s phobias!

Soap - Fear of Needles

John MacTavish, the almighty sergeant from the highly regarded task force 141. The youngest candidate to ever pass SAS selection, the man who disarms bombs for a living, who’s been stabbed more times than he can count on both of his hands, who is unafraid to stand in the face of death and spit on his boot, is afraid of needles. Now, there’s nothing wrong with being afraid of needles, it’s a common fear, yes? A lot of people have it. But not to the extent that Soap has it.

Trips to medical are a nightmare, if someone even mentions the possibility of blood work or iv’s, his heart rate doubles and he’s thrashing and trying to get out of there. Not even Ghost can calm him down.

He usually has to be sedated (which is the worst part because you need to make sure 1. That he doesn’t notice, and 2. the needle doesn’t snap with the force that he’s using to try and get away) to even think about getting a needle in any part of his body. And even then he’s fighting to get away. He will literally do anything to run, even when they have the hardest grip on his arm, he’d rather it rip off or dislocate than get a needle in his arm.

Due to this fear, he only goes to medical if he’s forced, threatened with discharge or unconscious. Stitches are also a nightmare as-well, he would rather bleed out than get a needle pushed through his skin with thread.

Price - Fear of being alone

Price’s fear is usually something he tries to conceal from the others. The other 3 share their experiences openly, (well almost openly, it had to take a bit of opening up from Ghost) but eventually they were all able to make adjustments for each other.

And Price insisted that he didn’t have anything that would interfere with their line of work, but this one interferes the most. Each and every mission they take, Price is full of anxiety and is always tense because at any moment could he lose each and every one of his boys.

Only when they get back to base safe does he ever actually relax, all the anxiety seeps from his body because his boys are okay, Kate is okay.

He eliminates every single one of the things that may endanger the ones he loves, even if it means breaking a few rules to get there.

On the worst days, he can’t sleep on his own so he usually sleeps on the floor beside Gaz, until the sergeant forces him into bed so that he can properly rest. He has a little clue of what’s going on, but he doesn’t want to pry about it until Price feels okay to open up about his fear.

Ghost - Fear of mirrors

Something about looking in a mirror or any reflection sends chills down Ghost’s spine. It sends his body into fight or flight whilst he desperately tries to figure out a way to tear his eyes away from the one thing that he’s afraid of.

A lot of people are scared of mirrors due to the fact that there could be something spiritual, or that there is another world behind a mirror, and that concept is terrifying.

But ghost is afraid of what’s in the mirror, what looks back at him every time he comes in contact with one, himself.

He didn’t get similar symptoms to Johnny, its more of a deer in headlights, his palms sweating and his heart racing, his reflection unmoving just like he was; not daring to make eye contact with the demon in the mirror, but now he’s decided to wear his mask, it’s much easier to pass by a mirror or even look into it, because he doesn’t see Simon Riley, he sees Ghost.

He’s working on it though, he promises.

Gaz - Fear of heights

Now Kyle didn’t have any fears prior to the helicopter incident. He just got on with things and made sure to dive headfirst into whatever he possibly could.

But after dangling out of a helicopter above a moving road with lots of cars with armed soldiers In them, it can do stuff to a guy.

Anytime he looks down from cliffs or even standing on top of a table to change one of the lightbulbs, nausea overcomes him and he starts to become dizzy, his head reeling as his entire body telling him he needs to throw up. More often than not, he passes out.

It wasn’t nice for anyone having to catch an unconscious sergeant from the top of a table after he threw his guts up onto the floor.

Usually he can switch off and just get on with zip lining but now he can’t do it without feeling like his insides are turning inside out, but nobody blames him.

[loren91]

In my last post about Wilhelm and why his flaws are important for the narrative, I may have come off as a tad bit harsh calling him a bad person. So let me elaborate on that one more. I don’t think he’s a bad person. He’s an interesting character, my favourite character in the show even, which in terms of storytelling, is a much larger compliment than saying ‘he’s so sweet and good’. He’s an incredibly nuanced character and I’d like to talk a bit more about his personality.

Let me really emphasise one thing.

WILHELM IS NOT SHY.

For some reason, it seems to be very common to interpret his character as a shy, nervous little cry baby. Which I don’t agree with.

Usually in filmmaking, the first time you show your protagonist you want to have a scene that displays the character's core essence. To properly introduce them to the audience.

Look at how Wilhelm is introduced to us:

We see him having an anxiety attack, his face is covered in bruises and he’s trying to control his breathing. There are flashbacks of a bar and a random guy harassing him, and of course, the fight. There are paparazzi outside the car that are clearly bothering him. Then he’s arguing with the poor assistant about the script for the statement, raising his voice at her.

What does this tell us about his character? He’s got anxiety issues, he’s not very happy with living in the public eye, he’s quick to anger and he’s rather aggressive. Wilhelm is an angry, angry boy. And he stays angry for most of the first episode. Except for when he’s in close proximity to Simon. (Or when he’s drunk)

The church scene in ep 1, where Simon is singing, that’s the first time we see him smile. Which is a really sweet way to show us his fascination and attraction to Simon from the very start, but not only that, it also offers something that can counteract his anger issues. That’s why we are rooting for Wilmon from the start!

Yes, Wilhelm is nervous around Simon to begin with, but that’s because he has a crush, not because of his personality. Later, as soon as Simon confirms that his feelings are reciprocated, Wilhelm becomes a lot more forward. I mean come on, who was the initiator in the fish scene really? Wilhelm knew exactly what he was doing, kissing Simon’s neck and hugging him from behind. But even in the beginning, who’s the one pursuing who first? Who’s the one chasing after the other at the party? Who’s the one texting first? Who’s the one reaching out their hand first during the movie night? Wilhelm! Those are not the actions of a chronically shy person.

If he ever seems unsure or withdrawn around his peers, especially around August, that’s not because he’s shy or nervous or sad. He’s frustrated. August is so fucking annoying. He dislikes August with a passion from the very beginning but he’s trying so hard not to let it show. Mainly, I think he’s frustrated that he can’t just dump his ass immediately.

The opening to ep 1 is also really smart in another way, it establishes the possible consequences Wilhelm may face for his mistakes. If he doesn’t behave, his mother will make sure he pays for it. When they decide to send him to Hillerska, against his wishes, his mother says “Hillerska will help give you routine and the right type of friends” (although she does say ‘umgänge’, which technically translates closer to ‘company’. So I think she might be more concerned about him being integrated into the correct community rather than making actual friends) We also see Erik tell him that he can trust August. So Wilhelm is expected to like August, and he doesn't dare break his family’s expectations of him, because he’s terrified of the consequences. He can’t speak up against August, even when he’s saying awful stuff or bullies Simon right in front of him. He’s scared of what could happen if his mother found out he’s not ‘making the right the right type of friends’. So he’s trying to conform to the elite culture at Hillerska, at least for show. 

Just a side note about August, the dislike is 100% mutual. Considering how he takes any opportunity to scold and lecture Wilhelm as a sick power move. He also talks shit about him behind his back and belittles him in front of Erik and their peers. August is not really interested in being his friend at any point, he just wants the status and bragging rights of ‘being close to the royal family’. He’s trying to compensate for only being the 2nd cousin. I think Erik generally has a lot more patience with people and takes the stuff August says with a pinch of salt. ‘It’s just August. He’s just like that, it doesn't mean anything’. But Wilhelm certainly doesn’t have the same kind of patience, and when he’s not cooperating the way August would’ve liked him to, August gets more and more agitated, and when Wilhelm spills his secret about being broke, that’s the last straw. They really bring out the worst in each other.

But then when Wilhelm is with Simon (and sometimes with Felice and Erik as well) we get to see his true self. A sweet, goofy, confident yet sensitive kid, who values authenticity and freedom above everything else. And he can tell Simon has the same values, therefore he feels comfortable enough with Simon to just be himself around him. So it’s made very clear to us who the ‘right type of friends’ for Wilhelm actually are. But that’s not what his family or the royal court values. Keeping up the facade is more important to them.

He’s so scared, of his mother and the press. All of these expectations and the weight of a several centuries-old institution resting on his shoulders, is a lot of shit that a 16-year-old kid shouldn’t have to deal with, that’s where his anxieties come from.

I really hope Wilhelm finds a way to be his authentic self in the next season, carrying so much anger and pretending to be fine with all that bullshit must be fucking exhausting.