#also i talk exactly the way i write it is non stop with me once you get me going i barely stop to breathe i am exhausting

[lloydfrontera]

i stand by my conviction that the best way to read tged is by stopping in ch 401 but i do have a rant concerning ch 402 that is locked and loaded for posting and i don't know if i should wait for today's chapter to drop so you guys have the full context or if i should pretend it isn't happening and i'm talking about a hypothetical ending that definitely didn't happen

[palioom]

Hi omg I love your work so much I’ve been following your fics every time you post I thank the twitter algorithm everyday for letting your fics get to me 🥹

if you’re taking requests could I request maybe some period sex? Any Pedro pascal character of your choice! :))

Either that or just a fic with LOTS of oral fem receiving? Up to you :))

Can’t wait for your future fics, with or without my requests 🥹

hi! thank you so much for your request! i had so much fun writing this, basically went right to work and just waited a bit to post it!! I hope you enjoy! 🖤

recommended dose of dick

summary: waking up to your period in the morning, you insist that javier still goes to work. when he comes back in the evening, having worried about you all day, he knows exactly how to help you.

pairing: javier peña x f!reader word count: 2.4k warnings: 18+ content; no use of y/n (but a lot of nicknames); period sex; period talk; descriptions of blood; unprotected p in v; fingering; javier being sweet as hell

• masterlist •

Cramps.

That’s all she woke up to, that annoying tug in her abdomen and the mild cramps that would certainly get worse as the sun rose higher.

Honestly, she had been expecting it. That weird feeling in her stomach had been bothering her for days now, her breasts had suddenly started to hurt, too.

Still, she couldn’t quite stop herself from snapping at Javier when he woke up in the morning, already finding her in the kitchen, sipping her coffee. Slightly hunched over, a hot-water bottle pressed against her stomach despite the sweltering Colombian heat.

He knew immediately what plagued her, kissing the top of her head as he walked up to her, hearing her grumpy hum.

“Want me to stay home, cariño?” He asked, brushing his knuckles over her cheek. She looked tired and fucking exhausted, worse than he did sometimes after a long chase. 

Javier wouldn’t even try to say he understood her pain, because he truly did not. What he knew was that it hurt like hell and not even painkillers seemed to help in the first couple of days. Not for her, at least.

“How’re they gonna catch Escobar if you’re not there?” She responded, looking at him as he poured himself his own cup of coffee.  “I think I’ll call in today but you go to work or Escobar is gonna be the least of your worries.”

A small laugh escaped her as she said that, regretting it as a sharp pain shot through her.

He just smiled a little, drinking his coffee.

“You’re not scaring anybody like this, cariño.” He replied, chuckling into his cup as she shot daggers at him over the rim of hers.

All day he spent thinking about her, wondering if she was holding up alright every free minute he got. Javier knew she was tough, she would make it through the day without him somehow.

But he was worried about how she felt. Some months were worse than others, and it ranged from some cramps and back pain to feeling dizzy and sick and barely being able to move.

So once he got off work, later than he had expected to, he drove straight home, taking the chocolates he had picked up before work with him.

She loved them when she was on her period, said it brought her some relief, as long as she didn’t eat too much at once. It was the least he could do for her.

At least in a non-physical way.

Smiling when he walked into their shared apartment, setting the sweets down before finding her curled up in bed, blanket pulled up to her chin despite the heat, eyes closed but not sleeping.

Javier’s heart broke a little, seeing her like this. Hated to see her in pain, tired and exhausted.

Maybe he could help her a little.

Kneeling down in front of her, he brushed some hair out of her face, letting the rough pads of his fingers trace over her temple and down to her jaw. Taking in just how tired she looked, but also how beautiful.

Always so goddamn beautiful, no matter what.

Her eyes opened, bleary as she squinted at him, the smallest smile tugging at the corners of her pretty lips.

“Hey.”

He chuckled softly, thumb brushing over her cheekbone.

“Hey, cariño.” Voice quiet as he spoke, he leaned forward to kiss her forehead, lingering for just a few seconds longer than he usually would. “Still bad?”

She nodded and hummed before she sighed, freeing one arm of her loose cocoon of blankets and reaching out to brush some of his dark hair back, letting her fingernails run along his scalp.

“Been trying to sleep all day ‘cause nothing helps, but I can’t even sleep.”

He wished he had stayed home with her, then he at least could have tried to help her. Even if it was only to bring her things, to cuddle with her.

But as she had said, Escobar would have been nothing compared to her if he had stayed.

“Got an idea how to help the cramps and tire you out.” He said, smirking just a little.

As her brows knit together in confusion, he let out a soft laugh.

It took her a moment too long to realize what he meant, rolling her eyes with a smile as she did.

“God, Javi.” 

“Took you long enough to get.” He grinned, thumb still brushing over her cheek. So soft and warm, her soft smile making her cheeks appear so much bigger, making her look adorable. “What do you say, mhm?”

Leaning in, he slotted his lips against hers, hand moving to pull back the blanket she had wrapped herself in. The smallest hum left her, letting him continue as he rolled her onto her back by her shoulder, deepening the kiss as he went.

She immediately felt a different kind of pressure in her abdomen, moaning when his hand dipped into her tank top and squeezed her sensitive breast.

It was like a switch had been flipped, needing nothing more than him between her thighs and his cock inside of her, eternally thankful that he was so nonchalant about the mess of it all.

When he pulled back and got up, she looked up at him confused.

“Just a moment, cariño.” He said, leaving the room.

There was the sound of cabinets opening and closing, then he was back already, towels in hand and having shedded his jacket now.

She laughed when he threw the towels into the bed next to her before climbing on top of her, the pain that followed after making her grunt softly.

“Looks like you really need some relief, querida.” He chuckled, starting to take off her top. Rough, broad hands roamed over the warm and exposed skin before moving to work on her sweatpants next.

“Can’t wait for my recommended dose of dick, guaranteed to relieve any period cramps.” She joked, the smile that graced her pretty face so stunning, even despite the pain she was in. “Been waiting all day for you to deliver it to me.”

“You told me to go to work, querida.” He said, hooking his fingers under the waistband and pulling them down slowly.  “Could’ve had it a lot sooner.”

She rolled her eyes, pulling him down to her by the collar of his shirt, kissing him. He felt so warm against her, his hands wandering down to lay over her lower abdomen, right where he knew it hurt the most.

Like it usually did, his hands were almost better than any hot-water bottle when he placed them there.

It brought her some relief, sighing into his mouth as her hands worked on the button of his too tight jeans, needing him desperately.

His hands just never were enough.

She peeled the denim off of him with his help and his shirt followed next, leaving him only in his boxers.

When she gently palmed him, he stopped for just a moment with a soft groan, making her chuckle.

“Fuck, cariño.”

Javier let her continue for a few more seconds before remembering he was supposed to help her, not have her do this to him.

So he moved her hand away, sitting back on his haunches before grabbing the towel. She lifted her hips without a word, biting her lip as he placed it beneath her, then moving to pull off her panties.

She felt so exposed, like every time they did this, even though it was far from the first time he had fucked her like this, his thick fingers already brushing over the inside of her thighs before finding her lips. Pressing two fingers against her sensitive clit, he watched how she squirmed, took in her throaty hum that turned into a drawn out moan.

“Javier, please-” She moaned, rolling her hips against his fingers, her own twisting into the sheets.

Pressure already building as he gently pressed against the swollen bud, knowing she needed more than this, letting them slip lower to her aching hole.

He pressed one inside, slowly, her body tensing for a moment before relaxing into the mattress below her, his thick finger slowly opening her up, stroking along her most sensitive spots and making her whine.

Eyes closing when he added a second one, pumping in and out of her, curling them into that soft spot that made her see stars, arching her back.

“How’s that feel?” Javier asked, curling his fingers repeatedly until her thighs started shaking and her sounds became breathier, then stopped the motion. 

Even like this he couldn’t stop teasing her.

“Feel’s good- fuck, but I need you Javi, please, baby.” She whined, opening her eyes to peer at him, the pressure inside her unbearable as her pain slowly became secondary. “Stop being mean.”

“Mean?” He echoed her statement with a grin, once again curling his fingers over and over, feeling her get closer, hips bucking up and into his motions.

Her orgasm hit her faster than she thought it would, moaning as she contracted around him, coating his hand with her blood, the slick sounds echoing between them as he kept working his fingers inside of her.

“That’s my pretty girl, there you go. Just like that, cariño.”

Pushing her through every last wave as she hummed and moaned and whined, visibly relaxing already as the cramps eased slowly.

But she needed more, reaching for his wrist to make him pull back, seeing his fingers covered in her blood and feeling her face grow hotter at the sight.

There would always be something forbidden about this, like he wasn’t supposed to do this and like she wasn’t supposed to like this as much as she did.

She was happy that he didn’t mind the blood or the mess, wiping it onto the towel before moving to take his boxers off.

Visibly liking this a little too much as well, his hard length pulsing as he hovered over her, hand caressing her neck while he kissed her.

“Getting better?” Javier asked, notching himself against her slick entrance, her legs falling open just a little more.

She hummed in affirmation, smiling. “Still need my recommended dose of dick.”

He chuckled, bending his head to kiss her sternum, his mustache tickling her hot, sensitive skin.

“Yeah, I’ll give you that, don’t worry.” Javier said, slowly pressing inside, groaning against her skin.

Her fingers threaded into his hair, moaning at the feeling of him splitting her open slowly, inch by inch.

It still hurt, but in a strangely good way, feeling just a little uncomfortable as he stilled to give her time, so sensitive.

His mouth made its way up her neck, nipping at her skin as he went, feeling the vibrations of her hums in her throat. Slowly higher up until he found her lips, kissing her so hard it made her dizzy, his hips slowly beginning to rock back and forth.

Her moan was swallowed by his mouth, his tongue finding hers as he pushed back into her, the wet squelch of her pussy only spurring him on.

Over and over, her hands tracing over his broad back, back arching up into her as he kept hitting that spot inside of her, slowly becoming faster as he kept building her up, the pain shrinking down into a mild annoyance at this point.

His body felt heavenly against hers, so warm and solid, feeling his muscles flex and tense, pressing her deeper into the mattress.

“Javi, gonna come-” She choked out as his lips left hers to nip and suck at her neck again, leaving her no time until she tightened around him a second time, whining against his shoulder as her body tensed up.

Wave after wave setting her veins on fire, pushing the pain further away, finally having some peace for the first time today.

“Like that, fuck- Feels good, baby!” She mumbled into his skin as he gradually lost his rhythm, thrusts becoming sloppier.

“There you are, hermosa, fucking pretty girl- Fuck!” 

His teeth sank into her neck as he came, pressing himself deep inside of her, the pulsing of her slick pussy drawing him in deeper.

Feeling so tight around him, happy as he noticed her relax underneath him, trembling just a little at the sensation.

He stayed buried inside of her for a while as they caught their breaths, soothing the bite he left, his rough hands smoothing over her hips as he did. 

“Dose of dick effective?” Lifting his head to look at her, he caught her smile, drowsy and lopsided.

“Very effective.” She chuckled, cupping his cheeks with her hands, brushing her thumbs over his cheeks. “You’re the best, Javi.”

He hummed, pressing another kiss to her lips before he kissed her forehead, then pulled out of her slowly.

It was amazing how nothing could help but him fucking into her, her cramps gone for the time being.

“Magic dick.” She giggled as he got up to get a wet washcloth to clean them both up, making him laugh as he nudged her knee.

That deep laugh she didn’t get to hear as often as she would like to, his head always elsewhere, occupied with work.

“You need sleep, hermosa.” He said when he was back, already cleaned up himself and now wiping the warm, wet rag along her inner thighs and over her middle. Removing all the blood as carefully as he could. “You should be able to now.”

Finished with his task, he brought the rag back to the bathroom to be cleaned tomorrow.

If she hadn’t been so damn tired he would have dragged her off into a shower, but she was already dozing off as he came back to her, climbing into bed.

Looking so beautiful like this, eyes barely open to look at him, small smile on her face.

He pulled her against him, mindful of the towel, kissing her forehead.

“Maybe you can stay home tomorrow.” She mumbled, eyes drifting shut, feeling incredibly at ease now, slumped against his body. “Give me more of that magic dick.”

He chuckled, shaking his head slightly. His hand smoothed over her back, up and down along her spine.

“Sleep, we’ll see about getting you a dose in the morning.” 

Her laugh was nothing more than a sharp exhale through her nose before she dozed off, her face finally relaxed and peaceful.

He doubted he could stay home with all that was going on now, but there would certainly be time for a morning dose before he had to leave her.

[centipedelightning]

Hey, I was wondering if you could do a skeleboys x reader whose gut reaction when the get spooked is to sort of pull their boy back to them not caus they don't trust him their just used to being a protector.

(I request undertale and underfell plus dealers choice :D)

Thanks love your stuff by the way

Waaaa how cute! Ugh I love dealers choice it just means I can write my pookies (today that means the swapfell bros). Yk I always feel bad bc I feel like I write too little. I am used to writing research papers where I just get to the point so creative writing is so painful.

| Ut/Uf/Sf Skelebros x protective reader || super vaguely romantic for a few || fluffy |

Cw/Tw: None

Sans

He’s blushing

I imagine this would be the kind of situation where you two were near some people that got in a physical altercation and you pulled him back. That kind of unconscious instinct both surprises and Greatly flatters him.

He’ll go all wide-socketed and just look at you like you’ve grown extra eyes.

Once the y’all are away from whatever situation spooked you, he’ll start making little jokes non-stop. It’s terrible.

“what was that?” “Wdym what was that?” “were you trying to protect me??” “Tf are you talking about??” “you need a new nickname. i didn’t realize you’re such a guard dog.” “Sans what are you talking about”

Sans tries to keep the energy equal in a relationship. Not one-to-one type of stuff where if you do one chore one day he’ll do it the next, as much as if you put in a lot of work he’ll try to treat you or do something that shows that he knows you did it and appreciates it. So now that he knows you’ll jump to his defense at the drop of a hat, he makes it his mission to Not let you do that. He is flattered of course but he just doesn’t want you to get hurt.

In smaller situations where you just got spooked by something he’ll try to calm you down with jokes and puns.

Papyrus

BLUSHING AND STUTTERING AND AND AND

He’s so flattered he’s just a mess.

Papyrus is the type of person that will jump to anyone’s defense immediately, so you reciprocating the energy means everything to him.

He doesn’t spook very easy, so you’ll probably be the jumpier person. No matter what gets you, big or small, you just randomly pulling him behind you has him blushing hard enough to glow.

Emotional bioluminescence never works in a skeleton’s favor.

I fear that you don’t realize what you brought onto yourself though.

If you weren’t already, Papyrus is staying up planning you an incredibly detailed workout plan to make sure you are capable in combat.

“YOU SHOULD BE PREPARED TO FIGHT IF YOU ARE SO DESPERATE TO DEFEND MY HONOR NYEH-HEH-HEH”

The finalized workout regimen is planned exactly to your physical limitations. Almost to a concerning degree… did he do a secret medical exam or something??

No for the record, but he wouldn’t say no matter what the answer.

Red

Red is pretty jumpy himself so his hackles are already raised as he is trying to drag you behind him, but You dragged him back first??? You want to protect Him???

Swoon

He’s swooning

He still wins this nonexistent battle for the right to protect the other, so he manages to get you close to him. Sorry not sorry but Red’s protective instincts are hard to match, let alone beat.

If the situation was severe enough that you two would need to leave, once y’all do he’s all over you. Laughing and joking about how you’re trying to play guard dog.

He does try to check in a make sure you know you can depend on him yada yada. Please reassure him that you know and whatnot.

It’s not that he doesn’t trust you or feels insecure of course—hell one of his many types is strong and forthcoming—he is just also used to being the protector and wants to make sure you don’t burden yourself.

Edge

Utterly flabbergasted.

That’s all.

Confused even

Situationally you have two options: either you startled at something he also recognizes as a “threat” or you jump at something that just happened to scare you. Both of these options end with him looking at you like you are some combination of a deity and an oddly shaped cat. Confusion, wonder, adoration, a touch of horror—you get the picture.

More specifically, for the smaller option he will just straight up ask you wtf, but for the “big threat” option he gloats. Loudly.

He is about to get very loud.

Imagine something along the lines of “NYAHAHA YES FEAR ME AND MY HUMAN HAHAHA”

Edge is a skeleton that loves his theatrics what can I say.

You will also be put through a training regimen btw. It’s about the same as Papyrus’ just with more sparring. You did this to yourself.

Indigo

I’m so sorry but Indi picks fights.

He does

He’s shameless

Maybe you can try to physically pull him away from needling randos? Then again you jumping to his defense might just make him more confident and Worse.

You won’t get a workout regimen out of this guy though! Little victories.

for literally any other time where something just makes you jump and you grab him instinctually, he’ll play into it. You should tell him as soon as you can if that’s something you don’t want.

But he will dramatically jump into a fighting stance the second you start to tug him towards you.

He is always ready to defend his human’s honor.

Cash

He let’s you drag him back with very little resistance.

In all honesty he finds you jumping to his safety quite amusing, especially if it was from something small that just happened to make you jump and grab him with you.

If there’s ever a situation where you aren’t in immediate danger but near some (like some strangers getting into an altercation) Cash will absolutely allow you to do whatever you want.

He’s never gonna let either of y’all get into real danger, so as long as that doesn’t happen you are free to your instincts to try and protect him.

Hell, you might not even need to grab him with how much he loves to touch or hang off you. No sense of personal space truly.

[joesanrio]

Hey girl, can I have a Jey uso fic. Like you’re Paul’s daughter and like completely off limits. But he ignores that. It doesn’t have to be exactly like that, that was just the vibe. Lots of smut tho. Only if you’re comfortable. Thank you boo

Hey!!! Omg- I love this bcs I’ve been wanting to write abt Jey for a good while!! 🩷 I hope I didn’t disappoint.

Nobody will know | J.U

Summary: Being the daughter of Paul Heyman comes with its perks, but everyone knows that despite their attraction to you they could never have you…except him.

Pairings: Jey Uso x fem!reader || non-established relationship

Warnings: Secret relationship, teasing, closet!smut, nipple play, oral (m. recieves), asskink!jey, face grabbing, dom!jey, sub!reader, multiple orgasms, p in v (unprotected), creampies, L bombs, etc.

Word count: 2012

Ratings: Smut | 18+

———————————————————

“What’s up little miss untouchable?” Jey asked as he entered the locker room, as much as I pretended to hate the nickname, it always sounded so good coming from him. I smile before rolling my eyes as he sat down on the couch beside me, “I’m fine. Just got done filming.” I say avoiding his gaze. He doesn’t speak, instead he stares at me without even caring about how many people are in the room waiting for his acknowledgement. “You’re riding with me back to the hotel, right?” His voice entering my ears in a low whisper, I nod as he pulls away to talk to the other guys in the room.

Everyone knew that due to my dad’s overbearing presence that I was off-limits, barely getting to hang out with the other stars especially the male ones. Jey was different though; he and my father had this false sense of trust with each other which made him the only person who could even get a hug from me. But as much as my dad is protective, he’s also naïve to what goes on around him.  

“What’s going on with you and Jey?” Natalya asked as I walked down the hall, my neck whipped back quickly as she startled me, “Oh my gosh Nattie! Nothing.” I gasp as her eyebrow rises with an unbelievable expression. “Nothing; is like a simple ‘Hey’ not a nickname and whispering in ear.” She says looking me up and down as I roll my eyes. “Okay! Maybe a little something but you know how my dad is… so it’s always nothing.” I say giving her a stern look as my dad walks down the hall with Roman. “Mm’kay whatever you say.” She turns back around when she spots my father making his way towards us, giving me a quick hug and leaving.

---

“You look gorgeous.” His voice muffled into my neck before sucking a small hickies onto my throat, my head falls back against the wall before my arms wrap around his shoulders. Pulling him closer his sultry breath falls onto my collarbones once his now kisses go farther down, placing a gentle kiss above my cleavage as his hands hold my waist tightly. “S’good.” I moan out softly while his lips are now forming into a smirk on my soft skin, my hands grabbing the hair on the nape of his neck to pull him up. Jey’s lips always fit perfect with mine, the taste of his cherry ChapStick now on my plump lips once his teeth pull softly at my bottom lip.

A loud knock on the door causes us to separate, “I’m on a call, give me a sec.” Jey calls out as his thumb rubs my smeared gloss from the side of my mouth and pecks a quick kiss onto my lips. “My bad, I’ll come back later then.” I hear Kevin from the other side of the door before his footsteps are heard leaving from the door and down the hall. Looking Jey up and down as his print is now visible in his sweats, “We got to go.” I say as fix his hair that’s ruffled up from my grasp.

Leaving the room, the cool air hits my warmed body. “Damn.” Jey says as he sees me in the new lighting while we walk to the parking lot to leave, looking over at him confused he says nothing but almost hits the wall as he admires my face. “Stop being silly and let’s go.” I say as his gaze leaves my eyes to fall onto my now wet and plumped lips, “Want to go back?” He stops and juts his head back towards the hallway. “Jey! Cut it out.” I giggle as he continues walking and opens the door that leads outside.

“So nice.” I say as we walked up onto his rental car, he pops the trunk before putting his luggage in first. He smiles before grabbing my suitcase and placing it in the back, I walk to the passenger door as he unlocks the car, and we get in. “Oh my gosh. It’s so pretty!” I exclaim as I admire the interior, but Jey’s too busy admiring me. “You’re pretty.” He smirks as I look at him unamused while he starts the car.

I can’t help but smile as we finally leave the arena, Jey takes no time as his hand is now resting on my thigh. I stare down at his huge hand before it moves further between my thighs, popping his hand he pulls it back to rest above. “You need to focus on driving.” I scold as his fingers rub little shapes onto my bare leg, “I got this.” He says as he gives me a quick look before focusing back on the road.

---

Jey’s lips fall onto mine as his kisses make my skin burn in lust, his large hands kneed into my waist as he hovers above me. My arms immediately wrapping around his shoulders to pull him down further on my body, his hips grinding eagerly into mine. “More.” I muffle into his now plumped lips, his eyes opening to look at my needy expression. He pulls away from the kiss to remove his shirt, which I follow suit as my red lace bra is on display. Jey bites his lips as his hand cups one of my breasts and his thumb rubbing over my nipple, I moan out softly at his delicate touch.

“I thought you didn’t like lace?” He questions as he lays back in between my thighs to get closer to my breast, “I never said that.” I gasp as his tongue licks down from my collarbone to my sternum. His smirk felt along my chest, as he pulled my bra to the side to suck onto my hardened nipple. Jey’s other hand coming up to play with the other, “Fuck...” I moaned out as his teeth pulled at sensitive bud. His tongue not far behind to soothe the area, he then switches to the other side.

My hands wanting to grab onto something as Jey pleases me, I pull his face up from my chest to kiss him. “You’re so sensitive.” Jey’s lips muffle against mine as I moan into the kiss while my hands now fall onto his biceps. His hips rocking against my core, making my back arch into his hold when his hand leaves from my breast to my waist. “Just fuck me already.” I whine before biting onto his bottom lip, causing a quick slap to make contact with my thigh.

“Fine, but you gotta do all the work since you have no patience.” He said pulling away from the kiss and leaning back onto his knees. A pout forming on my lips as I lift my hips to remove my shorts that I’ve yet to take off, “Fix your face.” Jey says grabbing my chin roughly, making the wet patch on my matching red panties darker. He lets go of my chin before pulling at the strings of his sweats, looking up at him as he pulls his large cock from the restraints of his pants.

We repositioned ourselves, Jey laid back on the pillows with his hands behind his head, his cock standing up as his tip glistens in the dim light. In between his legs, I lean forwards and I wrap my hands around the base of his large cock. Drooling at the sight of the precum leaking from his tip and the small twitches of his cock when I run my finger over the slit. He groans deeply as my lips wrap around the tip, the salty taste of the precum collecting on my tongue as he throws his head back in a bliss. “You’re so big.” I moan before licking from the bottom of the base to the top of his tip, his hands moving from behind his head to fist my hair into a ponytail.

“Put in your mouth baby.” He moans as I relax my jaw to take as much of him into my mouth as possible while I use my hands for the rest. His hips rolling up into my mouth before his tip pushes into my throat, his hips faltering at the tightness. “You like that?” I moan as I pull away from his cock as his eyes close and he nods. “Oh! You’re doing so good!” He praises me as I suck on his tip, his hands pushing my head further down his cock. Feeling his twitch in my mouth, his hips thrusting faster, I hollow my cheeks as he lets out a loud moan.

“Take it Baby, oh fuck- Yeah Just take it.” He moans as he holds my head down while his cum coats the back of my throat. His hands falling from my hair as his head is thrown back onto the pillows with his eyes closed, pulling away from him slowly I swallow the cum. “Swallowed it?” He says deeply as his eyes open for a slight moment when I stick my tongue out for him. “Good girl. Now come ride me.” He speaks breathlessly, as I smile and crawl onto his lap.

Sitting on his lap, the feeling of his warm, wet cock in between my folds as I roll my hips slowly on Jey’s. Moaning out quietly as my damp panties add to the pressure of my clit, “Such a cock slut.” He groans as his hands hold onto my waist. I bite my lip as I grind harder against him, before lifting my hips to pull my panties to the side. Jey’s eyes immediately falling to my glistening folds as the wet sounds of our arousal fills the room, “I love it so much.” I moan before grabbing Jey’s cock to insert into my entrance slowly.

Filling me up as I slide down his cock, my hands pressed against his tattooed chest. “Shit, your pussy is so tight.” He moans as I bottom out onto his cock, “Only for you.” I gasp breathlessly as I wait to adjust to his size. His hands holding on my waist and rubbing as I begin to bounce, “There you go, look at you.” Jey moans as his eyes look up into mine. I toss my head back as my breast bounce in front of me, the soft sounds of my ass slapping back down onto his hips filled the room. Leaning down to capture his lips, his hands moving into the curve of my back.

“You smell amazing.” He smiles on my lips before his tongue enters my mouth once he places small smacks on my ass. Gleaming at his compliment, riding him faster, “You’re always so sweet to me.” I say as kiss his neck. His breathy moans leaving his mouth as I begin to suck a hickey on his neck, pulling away to admire the darkening bruise. His hands now helping me bounce on him, “Oh- I’m gonna cum!” I squeal as Jey’s hips drill up into my core.

His hip randomly stops, making me whine out in disappointment. “You’re going to cum- cut it out.” He flips us over, his cock running in between my folds before enters back in my entrance. Almost cumming immediately, he pounds into me mercifully, “S’good!” I moan out as Jey’s hand grabs my face gently to have me look at him.

“So desperate.” He smirks as I clench onto his cock, “Oh you’re going to cum? Want to cum on my cock.” Jey squishes my face as my eyes are fluttering shut, his thrust never faltering as I cream onto his cock with a shaking orgasm.

“Damn girl.” He smirks before placing a rough kiss onto my lips, he holds my hips down as he fills my core up with his warm cum. “I love you.” I gasp as his fingers find their way to my clit and rubbing small circles, “I love you more baby.” He smiles as we calm down from our intense orgasms.

[purrplegyuu]

The best for both of us | Choi Beomgyu

Pairing: Writter!oc (named Seoli), animator!Beomgyu

Warnings: penetrative sex, oral (fem receiving), clitoris stimulation, unprotected sex, overstimulation, poor plot, gaslighting, non corresponded love, toxic Beomgyu, soft som Beomgyu, sub reader, lemmie know if im missing something.

Word count: 2,6k

Masterlist

“We’ve already read your book and it’s amazing. We also saw the animations, and we all thought they are perfect for our style. However…” he stops talking.

“However, it’s too disturbing for anyone under fifteen” says his boss. The woman, the owner of the video games company, who wears an expensive suit that screams everywhere she’s a squared closed box. I don’t really know how she manages a video games company. “Which wouldn’t concern us if we didn’t want the money, but we need this project to be suitable for all ages”

“I talked about this before, I have already rejected various contracts because I’m not interested in any project in which my art is changed” I say.

“Well, as I already said before, we need this to be suitable for all ages”

I stand up, taking my documents from the table, and when I’m about to leave, Beomgyu takes my arm, forcing me to sit down.

“Well, why don’t we listen to their proposal?” He asks, looking at me with killing eyes, which I don’t really understand since he’s always been on my side when I rejected last projects for the same reason.

“Yeah, sure. We just thought it would be better if Kira’s enemy isn’t her mother but her father. This way, we can avoid some future problems with angry mothers” one of the workers points out in the presentation, the part where all of the changes appear. I frown, disgusted. “We can also make her boyfriend the good guy instead of just another enemy—you know, for the love scenes we need to create a fandom” A good boyfriend? In real life? I cannot help laughing sarcastically at this, to which Beomgyu hits me with his elbow on my arm. “And she might also change a little bit—see, this is Kira before, and this might be her after” the picture on the presentation shows the draw Beomgyu made with my instructions. I told him to use only black ink, and draw it very messy. I remember the day we decided that this art style was just perfect for my book. When I created Kira I was thinking of the worst part of the world, I even got inspired by my own life. She’s too thin because she had very poor eating habits, she’s tall, her hair is messy and greasy and the clothes she wears are made for someone bigger. Which makes a big contrast with the whole new character they made—this Kira is short, and has a big pair of round boobs, a tiny waist and big thighs; her hair is pretty and… she just seems like another video game girl character.

“We will skip her eating disorder, and she will not die at the end. There’s obviously more changes to do, but those are the most important ones”

Everyone looks at me while I try to do as much as I can in order to not explode there and then. I feel just so offended that I cannot even speak. Even if I open my mouth, nothing comes out.

I stand up, take my papers and get out of the office, not even worrying if Beomgyu tries to hold me once again.

After an hour or two of getting back home, I finally start to calm down. That’s exactly when Beomgyu enters home too.

“Fuck, you could have waited for me, you know?” He wasn’t mad, that’s just his usual behavior.

“Seoli, we need to talk” I do not turn around to face him, keeping up on reading the instructions of the new bedroom lamp I just bought. “Seoli” he takes my hand, forcing me to turn around. “Why do you keep rejecting any minor change in your books?”

I turn my eyes. “You should know that, Gyu. My books are all too personal. If I write something is because I feel it, and I don’t like it to be changed”

“Yeah, I understand that, but you cannot keep rejecting every opportunity you have” he sighs. “See, babe, I think this is the best company you’ve been contacted by, and if you want to succeed, you should sign with them”

I frown. “Why do you like this company that much? I’ve rejected thousands of companies before, and you always supported me”

“I’m just looking for the best for both of us. We’re twenty now, but soon, we’re gonna be thirty, and forty, and fifty; we need to make money for the future… this isn’t a big company—small enough for you to be important and ask for almost everything you want, but also big enough to succeed monetarily and as an artist. This is just what we need”

“I don’t care about the money, everything I care about is being loyal to myself. I won’t sell myself and my art to some shitty company. The things they said to me in that reunion were almost insulting! How the fuck am I supposed to be fine while seeing one of my deepest books being thrown away this bad and be happy with it because I MIGHT get two hundred dollars a month from now on?! Specially in this one book!… this is almost my own autobiography…” the last words were almost audible, very low in contrast with the rest of my screams. It hurts my heart as I said it.

I see some kind of compassion in my colleague’s eyes. We never talked too deeply about it, but I did tell him that most of my books have some kind of self insert somewhere, but never as important as this one.

He takes my body in his hands, hugging me so comfortably as one only time before—when I confessed to him, and he said sorry because he couldn’t correspond to me.

He moves apart without letting me go, and unexpectedly, takes the back of my neck and kisses me. He only touches my lips with his once, moving away just a little, and then kisses me deeper when I take the back of his neck also with my right hand and his shoulder with my left hand.

He’s gentle at first, only leaving some close mouthed kisses on my lips, until he notices I’m more eager, and then, he devours my mouth whole like it's the last thing he’s gonna do on earth.

His hands travel all over my body as he starts kissing the side of my neck, sucking on my skin, biting and then licking, to which I cannot do anything but hum in pleasure—he touches my back, caresses my waist and pushes the hem of my gray shirt up.

I squeeze his shoulder when he take off my shirt and starts kissing my clavicles, and scream of pleasure as he bites the bone.

While devouring my torax, he manages to take off my black bralette, and kisses all of the skin of my small breasts, making me wonder if he actually likes the curvy girls he shows me of it it’s always been nothing but a façade in order to no look like a pervert.

He takes my hand from the back of his neck, moving away from me, unbuttoning my low-rise jeans and lowering my panties, then guiding me to sit on the couch. I oblige, and soon he’s kissing my body again, my abdomen, my pelvis, my thighs—which he takes and puts them over his shoulders before looking at me, right in the eyes as if looking for consent, but keeps going without a second of thought.

I scream when I feel his muscle exploring all of my cunt without a warning.

“Gyu-“ I moan while tapping his back with the tip of my foot.

He notices I got more sensitive everytime he stimulates my clitoris with his tongue, so he decides to do precisely this while one of his fingers caresses my entrance. A second finger enters, and he starts scissoring as if measuring if something will be able to come in.

My hand found its way on Beomgyu’s fluffy hair, which I take strongly trying to move it apart but also trying to keep it as close as I can.

Once he positions himself on the perfect way to have me screaming his name once and again and again, he starts doing it nonstop, faster, and holding my body by my pelvic area so I don’t move too much. My whole body trembles from pleasure, and I feel the knot on my lower abdomen tightening so much I feel it’s about to break.

And within thirty seconds morr, my whole body spasms under his, while I scream nonesenses and cry his name. He keeps on licking my whole cunt, cleaning me from my orgasm, making me cry at the oversensitivity. I try to push his face away, however, my strength after an orgasm is always null.

He goes back to the same speed as earlier, to which I scream: “Too much, gyu!”, but he doesn’t stop. Instead, his pace becomes even faster, making my head spin as I unexpectedly orgasm once again, faster than the first time.

He caresses my pelvic bones, licking my juices from his face. He stands up and kisses my lips once again, letting me taste my own cum.

I hear his right hand unbuttoning his jeans while his left hand helps him hover over me. I hear his clothes fall to the ground, and then, his tip touches my left thigh. I move away from the kiss for a second, moaning as I mentally prepare myself for having sex after one and a half large years of not being active.

“I know it’s always been hard to go through changes, babe,” he mutters in between kisses. “but everything I’m doing is looking for the best for you. You’re really successful with your books, but you don’t know if it will ever change as you grow up” the contrast between his lovely words and his condescending voice tone, and his hand lifting one of my legs up to my ribs making me go crazy. “Besides, you can ask for any change you want, and as long as it doesn’t make the game too disturbing for kids under twelve years old, they will accept it” the tip of his cock touches my clitoris at first, and then, he explores my whole cunt, looking too casual in contrast with my high expression. “Seoli, I will always be by your side” and suddenly, that option didn’t seem like trash anymore.

With that, he puts the head of his cock inside my entrance, to which I scream squeezing his shoulder. He goes back to kiss my clavicles while going on until he bottoms out. Feeling his tip against my spongy point, the deepest part of my cunt, makes me forget about all of the doubts I have, and I already know that the second I wake up tomorrow, I will be calling the company and ask for them to meet again.

He doesn’t give me time to get used to his big size, and starts moving immediately after he bottoms out, at a savage pace that makes my head spin. The way he’s hitting my cervix strongly over and over again has me cumming after less than two or three minutes. He doesn’t stop there though, and doesn’t even slow down. The second orgasm comes after maybe five minutes more, much more intense and piercing. My legs tremble, and he chuckles while taking my other leg and lifting it up to my chest also, making his cock go even deeper.

He holds both my legs up with one hand while the other stimulates my clitoris in circular motion, nonstoping, without giving me time to recover.

I cum once again, and my whole body feels so tense I feel like I'm about to break.

“Gyu-yu, I can’t anymore” I cry, the tears spilling from the corner of my eyes as I take his shoulders, trying to move his body away from mine. “please”

“I know, sweet, but you’re gonna help me cum too, right? You’re not a selfish princess, right?” His face is not close to mine now, and my legs find their way on his shoulders while he prepares himself for fucking my cunt faster and stronger than before.

I squeeze the silk of the couch, while my tears run down my face and all over the couch, and I scream his name over and over. His pace becoming even more animalistic as I feel his cock twitch inside of my vagina, the heat inside of me making me feel like I’m about to be torn there and then. The feeling is so unbearable, but also addictive. At this point, I don’t even understand myself.

He cums inside of me with a guttural growl, and keeps fucking his cum in for some seconds before using his hand to try to put his cum in when it tries to escape. I cum on his fingers one last time, and he leaves a kiss on my forehead.

(…)

I fix my lanyard with my work ID on my neck, holding my drawing tablet and the handmade sketches I’ve made.

“Oh, see! There’s coffee over there!” Beomgyu says amazed.

“Every company has coffee for workers, Gyu”

He goes to get a cup while I look for the office. The boss asked me to meet her once I accepted working with her. I signed the contract a week ago after making her accept the clause of letting my opinion be the most important one over there.

“Oh, Seoli!” That voice… it’s just impossible to forget it. “Oh my god, I’m so excited to see you again! Ever since high school I knew you were gonna succeed, you’re so talented!”

We went to high school together, and after we graduated, we also went to the same college. She stuck to me since then, but I never liked her a lot. She wasn’t a bad person, I just didn’t match her energy. However, I did everything I could in order to separate her from me in college, right after I realized Beomgyu liked her. Beomgyu and I met at college—the three of us decided to study an art major—, and it took us only one semester to start living together as roommates, and two more months to start working together on the animation of my books. We left college so we could put all of our time on making money with the animations, and luckily, that was enough for Beomgyu to forget her. At least that was what I thought.

“Dami? Do you work here?” I ask.

“Kind of. My mother is the owner of this company, and she likes me to participate on all of the projects. We’re gonna be a team! Just like in college!” She says with a big smile. “Where’s Beomgyu, by the way?”

Everything makes sense suddenly, why did he get so excited when I received the invitation to this company, and why was he so eager for me to come, and why did he want me to stay here.

I turn around slowly, and as soon as I find him with a scared expression, I feel my eyes ache.

He fucked me so he could get a chance with the one girl he likes.

How dumb.

[screechingsandwichtriumph]

The hellfire club x reader

Includes: Mike wheeler , Lucas sinclair , Eddie Munson, Dustin Henderson ( I know there are some others , but I don't know them , so we will stick to our main characters<3)( Also I am sorry this took so long , but I am writing so many exams I'm gonna die and also I procrastinated as much as possible)

Warnings: yandere things, stalking, obsessive behavior , bullying, I hate this and really struggled with it even though I loved the idea

Summary: you defend Dustin once and not it's over for them. They need you

Thank you to @saturnsbabe69 for helping me figure out how to write this<3 (and sorry I was so late)

The hellfire club was known around school as a group of losers who enjoyed playing board games in all of their free time, hence a lot of people made fun of them

You on the other hand weren't exactly font of them , but you should never tolerate people making fun of others. So when you saw a boy knocking down a boy's- Dustin was it?- tray down in lunch and calling him a 'careless loser' you decided to do something small for it

Now , you weren't exactly willing to end up in detention for an unknown kid and his friends , but you could be really discreet when needed

You passed by the by Dustin and his friends who were currently cussing out tha boy and gave them a reassuring smile

Reaching Brad , the boy that had knocked Dustin's tray you stuck your foot out causing him to fall on the ground, head first

"oops , Brad are you ok? Maybe you shouldn't have been such a careless loser"

That's the same exact way those boys fell for you

After that expect them to be following you around

Lucas and Dustin , can and WILL stalk you , following you home , knowing your program and all that. And let me tell you, Dustin will look through your garbage

Mike will stare a t you from afar , collecting information but not obsessively stalking you. He will however try and discreetely get close to you , throu a class or even by accidentally bumping into you

Eddie was definitely the first one to approach(let's assume he is only like two years older) and in a non discreet way.

He will call out your name on the hallways asking you if you wanna go with them on the movies or something

Embarrassed you decline

All the other boys facepalmed but at least now it was out and they could actually be more open about you

Dustin would find you in the halls to talk to you about class , Lucas would play basketball and yell "this shot is for you" (and then most likely lose), and Eddie would just talk to you non stop asking you out once a week

Mike I think would be tha least annoying but don't expect him to not be obsessed. My boy would upgrade his stalking and he would totally threaten anyone that speaks to you

You become kind of their friend and you talk to them , but rejecting them anytime they ask you out

In the beginning they didn't mind much , convinced you'd come around and actually fall for them eventually

When sometime had passed and you seemed to remain immune to their efforts to woo you , they decided that needed to get more serious

They even scolded themselves, because what were they thinking , you are so delicate and perfect , so how could you fall for their distasteful attempts right?

They put on a nice dinner , maybe even a picnic in one of the most picturesque places in town

They make sandwiches and all , Eddie even learns some romantic songs to play to you, while Dustin prepares the food and Lucas carried it. Mike makes sure everything is perfect , collecting flowers and orchestrating tha whole thing

They take you there , in a blindfold that they really struggled to concise you to wear and they confess their feelings in depth

You end up not saying no to their advances not long after

[reds-skull]

Not Alive, Nor Dead

[PREV PART] [AO3]

Bit of a late update! Was playing cod lmao

Went into this chapter not knowing what to do with the two idiots, but the moment I put them in a room together, they just start writing themselves...

Also, the formatting on Google Docs decided to fucking change out of nowhere and it really annoyed me.

Price frowns at the three of them, displeasure and concern flitting in his eyes as he examines the state they’re in. Ghost is sure they’re quite the sight. Soap’s head is covered in blood, his eyes red from crying and with a pale skin, he looks like a bad cosplay of a zombie. Ghost is so tense he feels like his bones will snap, his muscles about as cooperative as a stone wall. Gaz is faring better appearance wise, but the Sergeant has been uncharacteristically quiet ever since they landed.

“Well? I assume you’ve found something.” Price squints, still unsure of what he’s supposed to do with his soldiers.

Ghost takes it as a signal for him to begin debrief, and he stands up on shaky legs, muscles screaming in protest, “no intel, two revenants extracted.”

The Captain sighed, clearly hoping for more. The other 2 teams haven’t found anything, the PMC disappearing like it usually does, “any hostiles?”

Now there’s something major they can give Price, “undetermined amount, non-human, sir.”

Price’s attention is caught, the previous frustrations gone, “explain.”

“They don’t have a face, take several headshots to kill, and turn to some sort of smoke when taken out.” Ghost resumes, “they all communicate somehow, the moment one of them spotted Soap, all of them rushed to him.”

Price strokes at his moustache, “I fear we’re not working against a PMC here, boys. This could be the work of one very sneaky revenant.”

Ghost has heard of similar powers in the past - corpse manipulation, illusions, mirroring. None of them exactly fit what they fought, though.

It seems they know even less than what they started with.

“What’s the status on the two revenants?” Price asks.

Ghost looks over at Gaz, who snapped out of his thoughts to answer, “unconscious, both of them. Medics said they’ll wake in a few.”

The Captain nods, “we’ll get them to questioning once they’re up for it. They’re our only lead for now.” he turns to Soap, expression softening a tad, “you solid, son?”

Johnny’s eyebrows raise, and he nods slowly, “aye, it healed already.”

And that means he’s miraculously fine, Ghost internally scoffs. Price obviously heard that, as he says, “take the day off, MacTavish. And get yourself clean, for goodness’ sake, you’re gonna scare a Vaquero to death and Alejandro will hunt me for sport.”

The Scot chuckles, “copy that, Cap”

“That goes for the rest of you muppets, I don’t want to see any of you before the revenants wake up, that clear?”

“Crystal.” Ghost grumbles.

After everyone else exited the room, Ghost made eye contact with Price. “Found a lead on Soap’s Reaping.”

Price’s brows furrowed, “there’s a reason it’s redacted, Simon. I can’t just go around and investigate every military cover up.”

Never stopped any of us…

“I’m trying to keep heat off of you, not endanger you further.” Price crosses his arms.

Ghost huffs, “with all due respect, sir, that’s a load of crap if I ever heard it. You know I’m not gonna forget about it, and I know you’re going to help me in the end.”

They stare at each other for a minute before Price groans, “what do you have for me, Ghost?”

He smirks under the mask. Can always trust Price to come through, “not enough, just a name.”

The Captain raises an eyebrow.

“Konchar. Supposedly, Johnny killed him after he downed his squad, but the Sergeant wasn’t… too coherent at that point.” Soap’s screams still echo in the back of his mind, the way memories have ravaged his Sergeant… it leaves a gaping hole in his chest.

“I’ll talk to Laswell, see what she can do. Don’t be surprised if she finds nothing.”

“I know not to expect good outcomes at this point in life.”

Ghost shuts the door behind him, clocking in a presence on the wall near it. He turns around to find Soap leaning on it, still as bloody as he was in debrief.

“Thought Price ordered you to clean up”, Ghost comes to stand in front of him, trying not to let his Sergeant see just how much his legs are shaking.

Soap gives him a lopsided smile, “decided I look better covered in blood and dust, some people are into that y’know.”

He probably saw Ghost’s unimpressed eyes, because his smile drops, and he looks away for a moment, “wanted to wait fer ye.”

Fuckin’ hell, he hopes Price can’t feel how his chest warmed up like someone lit a firework in his gut, “let’s get you to the showers then, no one is attracted to your stench.”

Johnny pushed off the wall, “I’m sure there’s at least one”

Ghost starts walking besides him, “don’t count on it-”

His left leg decided to give out at that exact moment, and Ghost inhales sharply, fully expecting to have a very up close and personal meeting with the floor, when two hands grab him.

Johnny pulls him back up, “shit, Ghost! Ye didn’t tell me yer fuckin’ broken!” he leads Ghost to lean on the wall.

“I’m not-fuck…” Ghost hisses as his leg muscles convulse, “not injured… Limbo was trying to get you, had to hold it back…”

Flames lick at his biceps, and he wants to close his eyes and indulge in how they relax his aching arms.

Soap doesn’t look convinced, and he gives Ghost a determined look. “Let’s go to yer barrack, closer than the showers.” He wraps Ghost’s arm around his shoulders, and makes him lean on the Scot.

Warmth spreads throughout him, “Johnny, I can fuckin’ walk-”

Soap starts walking, “aye, I saw how that worked fer ye before, haud yer wheesht.”

Ghost retorts, “English, Sergeant.”

“Shut yer mouth and let me help ye.” He takes them slowly to Ghost’s room.

“Much better.”

Soap looks up at him, annoyed, before he breaks character and laughs. It almost distracts Ghost from the pain in his limbs.

Johnny lets him off on the lower bunk bed, and turns around to close the door. He stands awkwardly in the middle of the room when Ghost pats the space beside him.

Soap joins him and Ghost exhales, lowering himself further into the bed. He takes stock of the various degrees of discomfort coursing through his body, and feels his Sergeant shift.

“I’m uh… sorry fer what happened there.” Ghost lifts his head to frown at him.

“You’re sorry for getting shot in the head? Fuckin’ hell Soap-”

Johnny twists his body to face Ghost fully, “fer not recognising ye! For shouting and demanding shit, fer making ye deal with teenage me, Reapers know he was a feckin’ idiot.”

Ghost lifts himself back up to tower over his Sergeant, “you wanted me to leave you alone?”

Soap’s face scrunches up in confusion, but his eyes… they shine brightly with his radiant fire, “I- didn’t want you to… see that.” he breaks eye contact, looking away a little flushed.

“I wouldn’t let you go through that alone, Johnny.” He looks at the familiar flames brighten, “no running away, remember?”

Johnny’s features crumple, and slowly, telegraphing the movement clearly, he places a hand over Ghost’s forearm, moving up and down gently. Ghost is fixated on the motion, his world reducing to the point of contact, the heat it emanates.

“Aye, I remember.” Johnny almost whispers, his face still pained, and Ghost doesn’t understand why. Fuck, he wishes he could read minds like Price. “It’s just… I didn’t want ye to see it… but I think I needed it.” 

Ghost nods, as if he has the capacity to contain everything going through him at the moment.

Johnny finally meets his eyes, “I’ve never met anyone like ye, Simon. Ye make me think I’m human.”

Simon’s heart beats twice as fast at hearing his name whispered like that, and he swallows deep buried confessions, words that should never be let out to the air between them, “you are human.” 

“No. And neither are you. But we could pretend, right?” Johnny gives him a smile, and removes his hand from Simon’s. He wants to chase the heat, but knows better than to try and claim something so luminous such as that.

Simon closes his eyes, as if that would help the temptation, “we could pretend.”

When he opens his eyes again, he notices the stains of red still marring Soap’s head. Simon groans as he stretches towards the side table next to the bed, rummaging through one of the drawers.

Johnny leans in, “what are ye lookin’ fer?”

He grabs the pack of wet wipes and groans again on his way back to his previous position, “bring your face here, Sergeant.”

Johnny raises a brow but follows Simon’s lead. He opens the pack and fishes out a couple wipes, “stay still.”

Simon takes Johnny’s chin and turns his face to the side, bringing the wipe up and cleaning his temples with the same concentration and accuracy he would use in the field to line up a sniper shot. He uses up several, leaving a pile of pale pink wipes on the bed between them, but once the right side is clean he turns Johnny’s head again, observing how he closed his eyes.

He puts too much trust in him, Simon thinks to himself. He can’t help but feel comforted by the fact.

He cleans the left temple, following the small rivers the blood made on Johnny’s cheek. Once he’s done, he takes a few seconds to just… gaze at Johnny. He doesn’t avert his eyes when Johnny’s flutter open, the bright blue completing the vision he is.

They sit in silence for what feels like hours, just looking for the sake of it, just staring because they can. Because they both survived today.

A yawn from Soap breaks the spell they were both trapped in. “You still reek, Sergeant. Get yourself to showers and fuckin’ sleep.” Ghost gathers the used up wipes from the bed.

Soap hesitates, and gets up. “Aye sir. I… thank ye. Fer everything.”

Ghost doesn’t look at him, “don’t mention it.”

The door clicks behind his Sergeant, and Ghost makes to lay down. He’s too fucking exhausted to drag himself to the top bunk.

He settles in, staring up at the bars supporting the mattress above him. For once his mind is calm, his chest is warm, and all he can think about is the phantom feeling of flames caressing his forearm.

Ghost supposes he was dead tired, as he falls asleep more easily than he remembers he was ever capable of. 

He startles awake to the feeling of multiple hands grasping at him, “FUCKIN’-” Ghost jumps away from the bed, watching the hands return to the ground.

He suppresses a shiver while he notes the sun starting to set. Did it really take the bastards of Limbo several hours to try that shit on him?

Maybe his good mood leaked to them. He won’t look a gifting horse in the mouth.

Price’s voice fills his mind, “glad you feel better, Sleeping Beauty. Up and at ‘em, Lieutenant. The revenants woke up.”

Ghost opens the door to see the Captain smoking on a half-spent cigar. “You really have nothing better to do than stand and wait for me to get up?”

Price takes another breath of smoke, “I know when you start waking up, Simon.”

Right, Price probably knows his own brain better than himself.

“That’s for certain. Let’s move.”

When they reach medical, Ghost unfortunately spots Graves out of everyone looking around the beds. The fuck is he searching for?

“Revenants are in the back, behind the curtain. We wait for Soap and Gaz here.” Price informs him privately, before calling the American, “Graves, lost a soldier in medical?”

The man whips his head around, covering a surprised face with a shitty smile, “John! Just making sure none of our forces got hurt in the latest mission.” the bullshit couldn’t smell stronger, Ghost rolls his eyes.

Johnny and Garrick open the doors, and Ghost watches Graves’ face curl into shock for half a second before returning to its usual, easy going smile. Strange tosser, that one. Ghost wouldn’t trust him with a dart gun at his 6.

“Ghost”, Johnny approaches him, and he immediately turns his attention to his Sergeant, “you solid?”

“Affirm” he walks nearer to him, standing at attention.

Price nods to Gaz, probably exchanging a couple of words through his power, and addresses the group, “Vargas and Parra are busy with managing the base, they let us know we can go ahead and speak with the revenants. Keep questions to a minimum, they’re likely still disoriented from the entire ordeal.”

The soldiers nod and walk to the back, staying a step behind the Captain as he slowly moves the curtains to the side.

Ghost analyzes the two sitting in their beds. One man, light brown hair and moustache, fit, dog tags peeking above his hospital gown. Soldier, American, if Ghost had to guess. The other, a woman, instantly locked eyes with the captain, a band holding her long dark brown hair back. Her skin glistens oddly at the setting sun’s light, her brown eyes piercing and alert.

He looks back at Price, and is surprised to see shock over his features. He’s about to ask what’s got him like that when he starts talking.

“Commander Karim?”

The woman’s face relaxes, giving the Captain a sharp nod, “Captain Price. I would prefer if we stopped meeting this way.”

Shoutout to forestshadow-wolf for guessing correctly who the revenants were! I was impressed haha

[yukinarinn]

My pleasure, Our pleasure~!

Yandere!Dom!Nagito Komaeda x Fem!Reader

My birthday was a few days ago and I wanted this to write as a gift for myself because I love Nagito, like I’m obsessed with this man!! especially the yandere version of him :))

I’m so embarrased to post this knowing a specific person will read it.

cw: NSFW, bdsm, romantic rejection, degrading (himself, but mostly the reader skskskdjxj) (slight) praise, teasing a lot, handcuffs, submission, domination, consensual non consent, sex toys, rough sex, orgasm denial, overstimulation, dry humping, fingering

You slowly woke up, prepared to move your body but something didn’t let you do it. You realize that you were in a strange room, in fact, a basement. It wasn’t that dusty but not that clean either.

“A basement…?” you mumble to yourself.

The basement was empty, though. And only you were here, noticing that you’ve been tied to a chair. Then, you started panicking and struggle, trying to escape somehow.

You didn’t even know why was this happening in the first place, and why you’re here, and not home already. And who exactly kidnapped you, you didn’t know this either.

You didn’t cry, you didn’t scream, you didn’t nothing. Since you’re tied now, you can’t do anything about it and acting like some cringy kid won’t help in this kind of situation, you still don’t have an idea who’s the person that kidnapped you.

In the next second, the basement’s door opened slowly and your thoughts faded away as soon as you saw no one else than.. Nagito Komaeda, your classmate. And also your deskmate since he went so crazy about it wanting to sit next to you all the time.

Once you saw him, you tried to look like you’re still sleeping so you closed your eyes, thinking if he’ll leave this way. But no, he comes closer to you and you could feel that his eyes are fixated on you.

“No need to fake anything, you know? I know you’re not sleeping” He said, and he seemed tired of this bullshit for months. You didn’t wonder why, though. But you weren’t going to talk about it again and again.

You opened your eyes, and dared to look at him. He was smiling, and he looked innocent, like usual. Then why are you here? you knew he was a creep, your classmates say this all the time but, you always tried to look at him in a way nobody looked, but always failed.

“Happy birthday, y/n!” He chuckles innocently at the thought of you being with him when it’s your birthday, and only with him.

“Stop being a total freak and tell me who brought me here!” you had some courage to tell him that, tho. You weren’t scared of him, he wasn’t capable of doing anything so harsh, after all.

On the other side, Nagito’s expression darkened as he’s lifting your chin up with his delicate finger, forcing you to look at him. He looked mad and somehow sad, you really couldn’t tell what he was feeling at the moment.

“Not even a “thank you” or something? trash like me doesn’t even deserve your kindness, but it’s just too much already..” Nagito mumbled those words more for him rather than letting you heard them too, but you did anyways and you were confused. Not confused enough to stay silent and not do anything about it though.

“Who brought me here, Komaeda?” you called him by his last name, just because your blood started to boil inside you. But he got more excited about what’s happening because of it.

“Hearing my last name coming from your sweet lips…” He says as he gets closer to your face, touching your bottom lip gently, and biting his own. “But that’s not enough, darling. Please.. call me Nagito” He seemed so submissive when it came to you, so you definitely weren’t scared of him anymore after literally begging you to say his names.

“Shut your mouth and tell me who the fuck is that bitch that kidnapped me?” you almost yelled at him.

Nagito got up, with a serious look on his face this time, admiring you entirely with his hands in his pockets. You looked at him disgusted and even trying to look somewhere else.

“Degrading your future boyfriend, huh? that bitch is me.” He gave you a smirk seeing how your attitude changing back to normal. If that’s the case, you started to panick again. But you only know that Nagito who’s talking about hope all day, what happened to him?

You looked at him without saying anything else, waiting for him to say something more. Your legs were shaking and started struggling of escaping again, he noticed and touched your thigh.

“Those legs should’ve been shaking because of me, not because you’re scared” He looked right into your eyes while saying this, his soft voice deepening. Was he trying to be dominant now? How funny.

You were biting your bottom lip, scared of what he would do to you if you said something wrong, actually. So you just looked down, hoping he’ll let you free.

“Why aren’t you feeling guilty? because of you, you’re here! and because of you, I am like this. A freak, a totally creep and a weirdo, how y’all are used to say.” He squeezes your thigh, making you look directly into his green eyes but you didn’t make any.. lewd sound.

“Guilty because of what..?” you asked not knowing what he’s talking about. Nagito bursts into laughing, going insane like usual. You weren’t surprised, but in this case, your classmates aren’t here to protect you from his insanity.

“Haha.. so fucking pathetic! rejecting me months ago and you don’t feel guilt like at all?” He rolled his eyes and you could tell he was really bothered and mad.

“That’s because our classmates always thought you’re a creep!” you responded, but this answer didn’t make any sense. Rejecting him was the best choice tho, since you got to see the other side of him just now.

“Fuck our classmates! I know it’s not about them. It’s just that you’re one of them saying all these bullshits about me!” He shouted and grabbing you by your shoulders. “I’m gonna untie you, and show you how much I love and care about you, okay? After all, this could be a gift for your birthday.” he unties your arms and legs, making sure you won’t run and grabs your right hand, leaving the basement.

“L-Leave me alone, Nagito! don’t you even know about boundaries?!” you shouted at him which made him smirk as he opens his door’s room, and quickly, he pushes you to the bed.

“I don’t even care anymore if you want this or not, I’ll just do what I always wanted to do to you.” He responded simple, and having fantasies with you once again, seeing you so vulnerable in his bed for the first time. With your legs almost open.

He wanted to get on top of you, and slowly his innocent smile and full of excitement disappeared once you slapped him hard.

“Don’t even try to touch me.” You told him, but he touched the red spot and smirked, going to his closet to get some handcuffs and something else.. which you supposed that was a vibrator. Your eyes widened as Nagito throw the vibrator around the bed and he puts your hands above your head, while using the handcuffs to actually tie you. At least the handcuffs were fluffy and not some real ones that can make your wrist bloody and sore later. Nagito then moves your panties to the side, since you wear only a short skirt. That was his luck.

“Nagito.. please, don’t..” you begged him, your eyes almost start crying for help.

“I’m sorry, but that wouldn’t happen. I’ll make sure that it’ll be pleasurable for you, too” He said, and then his middle finger moves right to your clit, you whined, trying to control yourself from making any sounds that can give him pleasure.

Nagito began rubbing your clit slowly, while looking at you lustfully and also trying to get a pretty cute reaction from you.

“Why aren’t you moaning? just do it if you want to” He said and rubs your clit faster than before, making you biting your lip and squeezing the blanket. He obviously notices it and thrusts one finger into your pussy all of a sudden.

“Ah~ N-no.. that wasn’t-“ you moaned which made him chuckle at the cute sound you made.

“I know you like it, now, be a good slut for me and take it!” He teases, fingering you harder and going even deeper.

You moaned softly because of his sudden degradation, you couldn’t lie. You kinda liked him degrade you, and also fucking you only with his fingers.

He thrusts another finger into you, hitting your g-spot with both of them, making your legs beg for more friction.

“A-aah.. N-Nagito.. I want m-more~” You begged. You couldn’t think straight anymore. The freak that you hated and tried to avoid all this time, and now, being a totally worthless slut under him.

“More, huh? Call me master and maybe I will” He smirked, and literally stopping from moving his fingers inside of you. Even though you hated him for his teasing now, you wanted exactly what he wanted after all.

“Mh.. M-master.. please, give me more and d-don’t stop!~” you pathetically begged for his touch right now. Then, because Nagito can be nice too, he starts thrusting his fingers into you again, stretching you out and hitting all the right spots.

“Don’t you think it’s a bit slutty to want to fuck this badly with the guy that you rejected?” He asked, still fingering you, and making you roll your eyes in pleasure. “Heh, doesn’t even matter. Do you belong to me and only me, or you just want to fuck around like a dirty little slut you are?”

The pleasure was intense, and you couldn’t speak anymore due to him fucking you so roughly, feeling him going deeper and deeper, helping you to reach your first orgasm.

“I- Agh! I b-belong to you and only you..” you said desperately and moaning louder as he thrusts another finger into your soaked and wet pussy. “P-please.. don’t stop, I-I’ll do anything for this to last~”

“What a slut.” That’s all he said, knowing you’re close to your climax as his fingers fucked you faster. “I’m not going to let you cum, darling”

“Please.. please, I’m so close- y-you can’t stop!” you moaned loudly and were so close to your orgasm, and he stopped, pulling his fingers out.

Nagito laughed instead, grabbing the vibrator and putting it at your entrance. Your entire body was shaking, moving your hips for some friction. He introduces the vibrator inside you carefully to not hurt you that much, yet.

You whined.

“I promise I’ll let you cum this time! just.. be a good girl and listen to me.” He began thrusting the vibrator in and out as you arched your back in pleasure, groaning softly. “Use your words, sweetie.”

“Y-yes! I-I listen to you.. M-Master!~” you tried to speak, he was aware that you can’t properly talk anymore. But Nagito won’t stop the teasing any sooner.

And to make the things more interesting, he actually turned the vibrator on with its remote control, vibrating and moving inside your walls. You moan at the amazing feeling, wanting to run your hands through his hair, but the handcuffs stopped you.

At the same time, the vibrator could move all alone inside you, but Nagito was also thrusting it in and out roughly, enough for a loud moan to escape from your mouth once again, screaming his name pathetically.

You’re close to your orgasm again, hoping he’ll let you cum this time. You arched your back, wanting to wrap your arms around his back since he was over you. But again, you couldn’t.

“F-fuck.. I’m so close! Nagito, please, let me cum!” You screamed, he only chuckled and thrusted the vibrator once again and you cum all over it, moaning his name.

He pulled out the vibrator and turned it off as you slowly came down from your high, breathing heavily. Forcing yourself to get up from the bed, but Nagito quickly grabs you by your hand and pulls you on his lap, now you were making eye contact with him.

“H-huh?? but I gave you-“

“You gave me shit! I want more from you, after all, you’re mine and I won’t let you escape either.” He whispers into your ear seductively, his mouth moving straight to your neck and attack it with soft bites and kisses and you could feel his clothed dick already hard which made you groan. “Ride me.” Nagito said while releasing you from the handcuffs.

You didn’t really want to, but at this point, Nagito was so attractive in your eyes and you start grinding him without even realizing, finally running your hands through his hair and moving your hips back and forth, driving him crazy.

“Fuck! I didn’t know you’re so good at it~” He breathes heavily into your neck and you moan softly at the hot breath, plus, feeling his erection growing even harder than before didn’t help.

“Nagito~” you moan his name, as he bucks his hips into you, feeling your heat between your legs grown. Involuntarily grinding against him as well. If you weren’t that horny, maybe you wouldn’t accept his offer but you couldn’t lie, he was good at what he was doing.

He takes your face in his hands, forcing you to look at him once again. You could literally see what he’s feeling by just looking at his expression. He felt exactly what you felt. Lust, and love..

You blush hard and ruined the eye contact with him, making him chuckle. Then he began grinding into you quicker and harder, causing you to literally sob of how much pleasure and pressure between your legs can feel.

“This was- ghah! supposed to be a punishment for not liking me back.. but- nggh!~” He groans as you’re grinding into him harder making his dick throb in his pants. “You seem to enjoy it a lot~”

Nagito smacks your ass and caught you off-guard, surprised that he would do something like that. Only to make you moan and cover your mouth with your hands.

“N-Nagito!~” you groaned as he smacked your ass twice, grinding against you faster, feeling your own fluids start to soak up your underwear already, you were close again. He bucks his hips into you harder, his clothed dick making contact with your wet pussy, you throw your head back. And he got the opportunity to lick your neck and biting it roughly causing you to moan louder.

“I-I’m so close.. Ngh!~” you bite your lip, coming closer to Nagito’s face, having the urge to kiss him.

“Y-you better be, cause next time I won’t let you cum this easily.” He said as he jerked his hips into yours one more time, making you scream his name again and again as you were cumming. You made a bad choice, realizing that you literally came all over his pants and made a mess.

You breath heavily, slowly coming down to your high but not for too long as Nagito, even though he was tired as you were, pushes you to the bed, looking at you with lustful eyes.

“I’m.. gonna take a condom and do something else in the living room, alright, y/n?” This time he was polite and nice, like how he is around your classmates. With a slight blush on his face, he left the room. You simply nodded, swearing in your mind why the fuck don’t you try to leave his house already.

As Nagito left his room for a few minutes, you were waiting for him in his bed. He made you feel good, you thought that’s why you didn’t want to leave him. After all, if you were considering your own feelings and not others’, Nagito is attractive and hot. Surprisingly for you, even the thought of him is arousing right now.

You suddenly heard your favorite song playing in living room, you started to shake, this song was your favorite indeed, but at the same time, it reminds you of your past and for surely it’s not a good feeling. So that’s what Nagito wanted to do in the living room.

“This song..” You mumbled and your eyes widened as Nagito came back to you, smiling like an asshole.

“It’ll gonna play Tag You’re It while I’m on top of you, isn’t that amazing and hopeful, y/n?” He smirked and hugged himself.

“Well fuck you too!” You shouted.

He knows everything about you, even what song you love the most. You should’ve stayed away from him. You also knew it wasn’t a good idea to insult him since Nagito is looking at you now, and he’s mad.

“How ungrateful you are. Fingering you to the point you were begging me to finish you off, and now you’re insulting me? Fuck that!” Nagito took off his green jacket and his white shirt, revealing his abs. You were surprised that he actually had abs. Oh and the noticeable wide shoulders and the sickly pale skin.. you were melting.

Nagito on the other hand as mad as he still was, he also took off his pants and boxers and rolled the condom on his dick, you were trying to look at something else since it was too much for you to handle, but he suddenly gets on top of you, pushing you harder to the bed and pressing his lips to your neck. You groaned as he was biting it and leaving marks.

Your eyes widened as he was teasing your entrance with his dick’s tip. Your legs starting to shake at the unknown feeling. You were already feeling the pain even though he’s still at your entrance, you weren’t ready.. but something made you want this at the same time.

Could be just his looks? or something else that you find attractive about him? you didn’t know either.

Nagito thrusted into you slowly while looking into your eyes, you were so embarrased to look at him as you moaned, feeling the pain and wraping your hands around his back. Tears coming up from your eyes.

“It seems like you’re a virgin, how lucky I am!” He said excited, he started to get into it even more than before since he just figured out it’s your first time.

In this case Nagito slids his dick into you in and out but carefully not to hurt you so you can adjust with his size, you were getting comfortable already and wanted more, but you couldn’t beg him for that and you know that he noticed it.

“Don’t tell me you want more, still acting like a worthless slut who just rejected the guy you get fucked by now?”

You slip out a moan due to him degrading you, and not to talk about his deep voice who made you wetter and wetter, and his dick literally going deeper into you, hitting all the right spots already. Nagito actually gave you want you wanted.

“Moaning because of me degrading you? well in that case, if you want more, you’ll have to beg me.” He comes closer to your ear and whispers into it as his hips slap into yours harder, making your eyes widen and biting your bottom lip.

“Ngh!—“ You squeaked as he grabbed your throat and squeezed it as he was going faster, you were hearing his groans, you knew he was close and you were too.

“L-Look how good you’re eating me out-“

Your walls clenched around him feeling the knot in your stomach, your back arched and burrying your face into his hot neck as you came. Feeling you’re getting down from your high, but Nagito didn’t stop fucking you, it started to hurt the overstimulation and you looked at him in confusion.

“N-Nagito?- This is too much!” you sobbed as he was fucking you faster.

“Shut up, only you are allowed to cum?” You started crying and panicking as the pain felt intense, you tried to push Nagito away but it only made him going harder making you beg him to stop.

“Pl-please, it’s too much- It’s not p-pleasurable anymore!-“ you sobbed, looking at him with your eyes already tired. He was laughing and smacked your ass and grabbed your hips.

“This is called punishment, princess. Now let me finish!”

You desperately moaned as the knot in your stomach came for the second time, eventually he buried his face into your neck as he cums hard into the condom, his high slowly fading away while you breathed heavily.

He pulls out, admiring what he just did to you. You on the other hand, were too exhausted to even try to listen to what he was trying to say. You knew you had to escape from his house, but it wasn’t the right moment to think about this.

And you were also sleepy, hoping he’ll let you sleep at least.

Nagito came next to you and hugged you tightly. You didn’t do anything about it since you felt comfortable and safe in his arms.

“I know, someone disgusting like me shouldn’t touched you. But you’re already mine now.. and once again, happy birthday, y/n~” He whispers.

[starrycassi]

Could you write Ambrosius and Nimona getting along while Ballister gets a well-rested nap?

Sure! I'm feeling a bit angsty, so, have this.

A golden wound.

Or the one where Nimona reluctantly decides to become something like friends with Ambrosius.

TW for slight, non-graphic mentions of self-destructive behavior and general relationship problems. Also, implied child neglect and abuse. And drinking but in a good way.

Putting a kingdom back together was hellish work.

Nimona had never, ever worked so much. She wasn't immune to exhaustion, but it had been a couple of years since she'd felt so tired. Her muscles ached, her breaths were uneven, her head was spinning. She had been at it all day — rubble and ruins had been her only companions for the day.

But, she was satisfied. The kingdom had done most of the work already, all while she slept and rested, so it was only fair to help the people now.

Ballister stumbled into the kitchen, and he looked as tired as Nimona felt. Ambrosius entered behind him, talking and gesturing at his boyfriend. Nimona got up to say hi, used to their stupid bickering, but she quickly noticed something different.

Ballister's arm, exactly in the part where flesh met metal, was dripping something, something that looked and smelled too much like blood to be considered anything else. Ambrosius's concerns seemed to be, for once, actually important.

"You need to get that checked, Bal!"

Nimona jumped over the couch, and her thighs ached, so she turned into a wolf, and now her back ached. She could only wonder how Ballister — mortal, soft Ballister— would be feeling. If she was worn out, he probably was in the verge of death.

"It's nothing, Ambrosius"

She turned into a cat, and jumped on the table. Ballister and Ambrosius didn't even glance her way, making her worry even more. They usually stopped their fights out of shame when she was near.

"You're bleeding. It is something, and it's something to be concerned about!"

Nimona recognized it before any of them did. She saw that spark, that surge of electricity. Fatigued lovers in a quarrel? A recipe for disaster. Ballister's eyes hardened, and he faced Ambrosius, snapping.

"I was bleeding when you mutilated me, wasn't I? Well, I survived that. I'll survive this. You didn't seem concerned back then, did you?"

Ouch.

Ambrosius's face contorted into a mix of every possible expression, and he looked ready to puke. Ballister went pale. Nimona froze.

Ballister never referred to it as "mutilation", even if it was. He never brought it up, neither did Ambrosius, and they seemed to be doing just fine that way, so, she stopped bringing it up. Clearly, that wasn't the case.

"That's not fair" Ambrosius muttered, but his eyes were too shiny, his voice too shaky.

Ballister seemed unable to come up with an answer, any answers, so he just turned around, and left. He picked that up from Nimona, probably. Run from your problems, until they catch up to you.

She ran behind him.

.

When they came back, it was dark. Ballister's arm had been healed by an actual medical professional; he was out of it, asleep on Nimona's hands, who didn't have a problem carrying their boss all the way back to his house.

She was even more tired, now. The place where Ballister had decided to live was on the outskirts of the city, one of the old Goldenloin houses, spacious and elegant.

They got in quietly, Ballister had given her a copy of the keys. He left his boss on the first room he came across, too drained to try and find Ballister's actual room. It was somewhere in the second floor, and she didn't feel like navigating the maze of halls.

She looked at the resting man, and smiled. Ballister needed to rest — even if it was on a drug-induced sleep, at least he was sleeping.

Life could be peaceful, sometimes.

Someone screamed in the kitchen. She suddenly remembered that Ambrosius did, in fact, exist. She turned into a cat, again, since it was the form that ached the less, and ran to the kitchen, adrenaline pumping through her veins. Sure, she wasn't fond of the blond, but his dead would definitely have a horrible impact on her boss's life.

He was pathetic. She'd seen people drink themselves to death countless times, but at least they looked like they were having a great time. Ambrosius was just sobbing uncontrollably, quietly, kneeling down, while he tried to pick up the pieces of a broken glass utensil. She chuckled to herself, relieved and amused. What would the kingdom think of their perfect little hero, now?

A hero that wasn't stopping. A hero that didn't manage to put the pieces together. A hero that didn't look at her when she called out to him. A hero that, at the sound of her voice, suddenly pressed the pieces together. A hero with bleeding hands.

Her brief relief left as soon as it came. Ambrosius wasn't reacting. She called out for him again, using his actual name this time. He started hyperventilating. She took a step forward, and his sobs turned into silent tears. The kitchen was full with the smell of burnt food.

"Goldenloin!" She demanded, changing back to her human form, confused. Ambrosius had never acted like this before. They didn't even like this idiot, but it felt wrong, to look at the weeping mess. Ambrosius should be a jackass, a self-absorbed moron; that's how they worked. He said something stupid and she laughed. They mocked each other. They fought over Ballister, they argued and ignored the other.

But she couldn't ignore this, could she? That was how they got into this mess. Ballister ignoring the situation. Ambrosius ignoring the past.

Ambrosius finally looked up, hie eyes bewildered and unfocused. He wasn't here. He was pale, sweaty. Nimona decided that, perhaps, this was too much to ignore. Jokes and harsh decisions wouldn't get them out of this one.

"Hey, man" she whispered, unsure of what to do or say, "It's me. Nimona. The boss is fine. Just... needs rest. That's it"

Ambrosius kept looking at her, his already slit eyes looking even smaller, puffy from all the crying. She moved forward, lifting a hand. He flinched, shrinking in on himself, closing his eyes.

Oh.

Something in their rib cage moved. She simply kneeled down too, slowly placing her hand on Ambrosius's shoulders. He kept on shaking.

"Dude. Your hands. Blood. Com'on. Let's get some bandages"

He didn't say anything. It was up to Nimona to get him to stand up, directing him around. She left him on the couch, running quickly for the first aid kit. He didn't move, just staring at her like she was some sort of puzzle.

She worked in silence, picking out what she needed, opening up the alcohol. It was a methodical thing she'd done a million times before, for Gloreth.

She chuckled, again. What would Gloreth think of her little descendant? Of how he trembled when someone raised a hand? Of his fear, and his love?

They stayed that way for enough time to get Ambrosius's wounds cleaned and patched up.

"Bal" he whispered, breaking the stillness of the room, "Ballister. He's fine?"

"Fine as can be" she answered back, shrugging, "Took him to the hospital"

They both looked at each other, uncomfortable.

"Thanks" Ambrosius mumbled, looking somewhere over Nimona's head, "For, well, everything"

He vaguely gestured at himself, and she smiled.

"That's my job, man. Take care of Ballister's business"

He inhaled at this, sharp and hurt. Tears gathered in his eyes, without falling.

"I don't plan on that staying way. I'm moving out. Bal and I... we should break up"

"Yeah, totally" Nimona blurted out, automatically.

Ambrosius sniggered at her answer, blinking too many times. Nimona blushed in embarrassment.

"No, I mean- I don't like you. But Ballister does. I think"

"After what he said today? I don't think so"

"I like to believe" said Nimona, remembering childish play and soft hugs, "that you can say mean things to people you love"

"You do it often?"

Ambrosius's tone was incriminating, condemning. She wanted to scream at him, tell him that not as often as he did, judging by the amount of mini fights Ballister and him had.

Then, she thought about his trembling frame, huddled over himself to search for comfort.

"No. It's done to me often, though" Her eyes burned, so, she tried to change the topic quickly, "what were you even doing in the kitchen? Never seen you there"

"Aside from having a heart attack?" He laughed bitterly, closing his eyes, "Trying to have some food ready for Ballister. Turns out, I have no idea on how to cook"

The awkward silence returned. Nimona started to drift away.

Ambrosius suddenly got up, and Nimona was too tired to go and search for him, again. He came back, balancing a bottle of wine and two glasses. The bandages got redder and redder by the second.

"You're immortal, right?" he questioned, raising an eyebrow. When Nimona nodded, he smirked, "That means you're above drinking age"

Nimona was, in fact, able to handle her alcohol. She'd been around for centuries, learning a couple of tricks over the years.

Ambrosius poured them both an acceptable amount, smiling even more. Then he took a swing, straight from the bottle, before setting down again.

"Even if he does love me" he explained, moving his hand in an arch, "I am, clearly, not the best suitor for your boss"

"I think he should get to decide that, truly"

Ambrosius lifted his eyebrows, amused. Nimona usually told him to leave Ballister alone five times per day.

"My mom had a lot of partners" he confessed, before swallowing the contents of his glass in a swift movement, "They all chose to be with her. She was shitty to most of them. Perhaps it's inherited"

Ah, yes. The Goldenloins and their very good communication skills.

"Your great-great-really-great-grandma was a shitty friend to have, too"

"That helps me feel so much better. Thank you very much"

"Hey, man. I'm not really interested in the whole 'helping' thing"

But her body still ached, Ballister was still asleep and Ambrosius was still here, downing glass after glass as if the wine would run away from him at any second.

"I guess Goldenloins are just fucked up people, uh? We ruin everything we touch"

Nimona shrugged, "I'm not gonna debate that. But, you know, maybe it's time for you to start fixing the stuff you break"

Ambrosius smiled, and this time he looked a little less like a dying man and more like a recovering one. He lifted up his almost empty glass, and they toasted to that.

The last thing Nimona heard before falling asleep was the start of a cooking tutorial on Ambrosius's phone.

[niobiumao3]

.

'TechPhee is rushed'

Nothing has been rushed because literally nothing has happened! The closest they've come is an awkward not-goodbye after an episode clearly showing them circling one another. What's there to have been rushed??? Phee attempting to express interest and Tech completely missing it? How do you rush the ground level, absolute first step of a romantic interaction?

'Phee needs more characterization'

Definitely! And yet somehow that's not a reason to not ship her with Fennec, whom she's never even met (that we know of), or Cid, who she's been on screen with for about 1/10 as much time as Tech. Those are the 'better' canon options for her despite little to no interaction with them. How does that make more sense than Tech??

'She was neurotypical at Tech in their last scene. '

As we all know, neurotypical people are immediately aware of how to interact with ND/autistic people, they're all taught from an early age about the differences, how to spot them, etc. <sage nod>

I'll come clean; what I saw in this scene was two people misunderstanding one another. That the reason is Phee is probably neurotypical was likely the root cause, but an autistic person in her position probably would have ALSO been frustrated, they'd simply have expressed it differently. Are you going to tell me any two autistic people are automatically better at communicating because, do I have news for you...

Phee is mildly concerned they're running off in the night, prods at Tech a little. Tech doesn't know what she wants/expects, so he offers her a briefing, which to him makes perfect sense. That's how you tell someone what your mission is about! But to Phee, it comes across as a distancing, a pushing away, which is why she reacts so negatively IMO. They've been there for, what, probably a month or more, helping rebuild after the tsunami, integrating into the community, and there's no goodbyes or anything, just a 'briefing'. So it upsets her, this cutting off that she perceives. Which is of course not at all what it is, just the entire Batch has literally no experience with telling friends/non-combatants 'going on a risky mission with little chance of returning, wish us luck!', and definitely Tech doesn't if his body language is any indication. (And yet he was standing outside the ship...)

And she tries to get through to him in the way she knows how, which obviously fails--you can practically SEE him thinking 'what does that MEAN' when she talks about not running off. What she means is, 'come back to us, to ME, in one piece'. But hey, she has her own reasons for being careful and not putting herself too out there, it's just Tech has zero context for her wording.

At which point she seems to realize there's still a long way to go in getting to know one another, in coming to an understanding about the differences in how they experience life and express themselves. So she stops, lets it go. They can discuss how friends--good ones, at least--do not go on do or die missions without at least an 'I hope I can come back' once they return. (*cough*)

I don't know how this scene could have gone differently without an implication of a lot of interactions happening which addressed some of their differences. Which would be the 'rushing' people are accusing the ship of--and it literally isn't implied! At all!! If anything this scene plays right into need to slow roll things. It's like the writing can't win; either it's rushed, in which case omg lazy writing, or Phee is being horrible to Tech for not knowing how to interact with him in more personal moments despite them still determining where they stand.

The expectation that Phee handle Tech 'more carefully' in this scene is both racist in its assumptions about her and infantalizing to Tech. Sure, she could have done better, but she didn't exactly do him some sort of irreparable harm, any more than Hunter did when saying Tech can talk for hours on a subject. But Phee is a black woman and suddenly the expectation she perform this interaction perfectly as acceptable by every fan (NT/allistic or not) is the only way for the ship to be even moderately acceptable.

No one says you have to like the ship or be remotely interested in it, but attributing characteristics to it that it clearly doesn't have reveals a need to negate it, to declare you're correct in not liking it.

You can just not like it. But claiming things with no actual basis in the writing or canon looks really suspicious.

[bahja-blix]

Oliver the Deaf/Mute imp kid controversy

During my break from most platforms due to family issues and me not wanting to indulge myself on most platforms for peace and quiet I pondered something during that time. I wanted to do something fun Regarding lil Oliver who Finally has a name after all the backlash Viv got for NOT naming her Deaf or possibly Mute character...

I wanted to try to crack exactly what Fizz and Oliver said and how accurate it is which will require me to also learn more along the way and it's thanks to the fact that I actually have an official Sign language Dictionary that has real pictures that teaches a reader how to Sign when speaking with your hands, what to Sign, and much more. The book itself was given to me as a gift from a licensed Sign Language and Deaf speaking and assisting teacher who was awesome to talk to. She specializes with Special Needs and other forms of Disabilities in her class such as Autism, ADHD, (Both in which I have but were diagnosed many years apart) or other Disabilities on the spectrum or differing conditions. And I've kept it since then.

This is Oliver, Olive or Ollie for short. Say Hi :D

He uses Sign Language to speak and is possibly both Deaf and Mute however I'm going off research regarding his condition/disability.

Here is the book from front to back ^^

As I read and look around at the endless adventure of learning a new Language and cracking what the show Signed it will also further my development of more accurately developing my own characters that are either Mute, Deaf, Or both. Some of them are main characters and either speak fluent Sign Language along with another Language taught via writing which is hard work but can be achieved over time. Some don't speak another language. Some of them are secondary, supporting etc. there's Always a role for them. Kuma is one of them, She's a main character of a series I'm working on. I'll show her later once she's finished in design. She is Both Deaf and Mute and uses a hearing aid to help hear from her Left Ear. She mainly speaks fluent Sign Language via hands or writes what she says. She's fluent in Japanese writing all in which took her years to learn by special teachers. She's treated as a person from thick and thin. Unlike how Viv treats her characters. Kuma originally comes from Tokyo Japan but moved internationally to California for college.

If you have any questions regarding my journey please don't hesitate to ask ❤️🙏

EDIT: I absolutely despise how Vivziepop writes her characters when it comes to "Trying" to represent something. That's why I was inspired to write this! That's why wanted to step in and be entirely goal oriented when representing stuff you can't do Viv. Viv sucks at representation in every way shape and form. From writing harmful stereotypes of All kinds, to misrepresenting the LGBT plus community I've been in for almost a decade, SA, SHrsd, Domestic Abuse victims (I hate to dig up a huge part of my past however... I fall into all those three categories too... Bcus my biological dad... Did unspeakable things to me...), to the way she writes her women vs guy characters in a non equalized way, the way she writes about drug abuse or alcoholics, and not give two shits about their development to the way she literally didn't give a shit about Oliver AND misrepresents the Disabled community that I'm ALSO in and left Oliver nameless UNTIL her audience CALLED HER OUT for that like... What the hell went through your head when you sat at the round table of yours with your team you call "Geniuses" like... Deaf Imp Child????? DEAF FUCKING IMP CHILD???? LoooooL! Stop trying Viv it's over! Your own political party doesn't like your ass no more neither wether traditionalized old school Dems like me or Modernized Americanized Dems. Everyone who saw through your bullshit regardless of who they are or where they lean don't want your shit anymore because you failed everyone around you multiple times for YEARS. I've found out So MANY things about you mate. I actually looked up to you... Lots of us did... And you only get worse from here. Your audience ain't the bigot unless they actively boot lick and kiss your ass. Valid criticism wether Harsh or Not is NOT "hate" lmao 🤣 love how thats your favorite go to word. Maybe come up with something original to call your audience you sack of poorly packaged horse shit, mmk! (Pilot Angel Dust reference btw if you get it)

Off topic but Viv really went Too far >:(

[vvatchword]

Paradise Lost, Book 2 (Non-Zoot Edition): Sin Addresses Satan; Satan Allies with Chaos

<- Part 2 || Back to the Beginning || Part 4 ->

I'm not zooted for this one, I just want to talk about it.

Keep in mind this is flow-of-consciousness, so I write down exactly what I think, and then later I sometimes discover i am wrong roflll

“O Father, what intends thy hand,” she cried, Against thy only Son? What fury O Son, Possesses thee to bend that mortal Dart Against thy Father’s head? And know’st for whom; For him who sits above and laughs the while At thee ordain’d his drudge, to execute What e’er his wrath, which he calls Justice, bids, His wrath which one day will destroy ye both.”

“To execute/what e’er his wrath, which he calls Justice” is a metal line and she IS NOT LYING

I am continually struck by how all of these characters have not only acknowledged that God cannot be defeated, they’ve always known God couldn’t be defeated. They still fought him anyway. If I were reading this in a less fantastic setting, I would be like: “M-hmm I feel like a few important documents are missing.”

Another interesting trait: all of these characters know the future. Sometimes it’s awkward—for example, they spend most of Book 2 trying to figure out what to do after falling from heaven, then wax eloquent about events that haven’t happened yet.

It’s hard to know how much was intentional here, and how much was just done in the spirit of the thing, but you know that saying: “With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day”? (2 Peter 3:8) It’s like these characters are not only devil-and-angel at once, but also every form of themselves from beginning to end. They haven’t yet committed horrors on the human race, but they also have. (This is not free will.)

This book makes constant asides as to God’s greatness. Everybody stops to talk him up—and by “everybody,” I mean “every single devil who gets a speech.” We haven’t had a single “good guy” yet: the only glory given to God that has been from a non-devil is Milton himself. While speaking of God, the devils’ tones rarely feel sullen or angry; instead, they feel very rote and matter-of-fact, as though they’re reading lines out of an encyclopedia. This is just the way the world is, and all the characters accept what is natural.

That’s dissonant on multiple levels. First, these devils literally JUST tried to overthrow Heaven (aka the ideal version of the world, the world-as-it-should-be). Second, given how absolutely broken the devils sound when they give their speeches—the ways they attempt to soothe themselves and comprehend their failure, added to their sudden comprehension of time (did eternity need to be invoked in heaven or Paradise until the birth of pain?)—these acknowledgments of God’s superiority ring false, like another scribe popped in and wrote BUT DON’T WORRY—

I’m trying to figure out Milton’s motivations here. Did he want to reassure the reader, the publisher, a religious authority, or himself? Keep in mind this was published back in a day where “freedom of expression” was not a thing.

By invoking the importance of the monarchy over and over, this may be Milton's attempt to say: "Mr. King sir, this is not supposed to be a story about your overthrow. Please do not kill me."

I’ve also started wondering about the political realities of when this was published. This feels extremely Protestant. Hey Wikipedia whaddaya say

[Milton scholar John] Leonard speculates that the English Civil War interrupted Milton's earliest attempts to start his “epic [poem] that would encompass all space and time”.

YEAH THERE IT IS

This book was published in 1667… by Peter Parker. Aw yeah :) With great power comes great abuse :))))

I also didn’t know Milton was freaking blind! You know, that fits; the story’s rhythm begs to be read out loud. I love the imagery that painters came up with: Milton dictating Paradise Lost to his daughters. I don’t know that this actually happened, but it’s kinda cool. Sounds like a callback to Homer so I’m a little wary—you know how people are.

Milton Dictating to His Daughter, Henry Fuseli (1794)

I bet this is exactly how he looked too.

HEEEGUUUGGHRRRHHHHH

Also, I just discovered that CS Lewis wrote a preface to Paradise Lost. I adored him as a child. I’m definitely reading that at some point.

Anyway, want to go back to reading Paradise Lost? I DO. Remember where we were? The snake-assed lady whose vagine is a Cerberi doghouse? Well, the devil asks who she and this Dart-wielding shade are…

Without research, I’m guessing the “dart” is a spear. The other option is an arrow, which sounds significantly less dangerous, and no bow is mentioned. I mean, you can still stab someone to death with an arrow, it just seems kinda silly. It’s like running at someone and jamming a bullet into their eye.

Of course, it may be meant to be an arrow. There’s a famous image in Revelations I can’t stop thinking about: the white horseman (commonly interpreted as Jesus—Revelation 6:2) comes out with a bow, but no arrows or quiver.

Holy shit, if you put Jesus and Death together you get a bow and an arrow and the arrow is death

I’m just kidding please ignore everything I say

[The devil asks: who the fuck are you guys and why are you calling me father?] T’ whom thus the Portress of Hell Gate reply’d: “Hast thou forgot me then, and do I seem Now in thine eye so foul, once deem’d so fair In Heav’n, when at th’ Assembly, and in sight Of all the Seraphim with thee combin’d In bold conspiracy against Heav’n’s King, All on a sudden miserable pain Surpris’d thee, dim thine eyes, and dizzy swum In darkness, while thy head flames thick and fast Threw forth, ’til on the left side op’ning wide, Likest to thee in shape and count’nance bright, Then shining heav’nly fair, a Goddess arm’d Out of thy head I sprung: amazement seiz’d All th’ Host of Heav’n; back they recoil’d afraid At first, and call’d me Sin, and for a Sign Portentous held me…

Suddenly, allegory!

I’ve been researching allegory lately—not well, and piecemeal—but I’ve been interested in its function, as well as what makes a good allegory and what makes a bad one. Now, before this point, I would have said that an allegory encloses the entire narrative, not just a part of it. But here we have traditional characters (Satan, Beelzebub, etc), all of whom Milton intended as representations of real spiritual beings, and all of a sudden: the allegorical representations of Sin and Death. They are not just characters, they are concepts—and yet I’d say they belong here. I feel like I can almost put a finger on why…

Was Milton a Biblical literalist? I really don’t know. There are most likely cultural and historical differences I’m missing here. I’m sure that, if Milton were a literalist, it would not be like that of the evangelicals we see today. Evangelical literalism is a particularly stupid, flat kind, and I’m not sure it was that simple back in 1660s England.

Another neat little factoid: a lot of Paradise Lost heralds back to the epic poetry of the Greeks and Romans, right? Who else sprang fully-formed from a forehead? Athena from Zeus! So this is a great callback and recontextualizing of an old myth, setting Lucifer on par with The Rapist King.

One big theme of Book 1’s was that all the other gods of the world are demons—every one of them. So Sin popping out, appearing godlike—for a moment, just like Satan himself—is a hell of a backslap. Athena was a virgin god of wisdom. You’re about to see what happens to Sin (hint: she’s a ho)

I suppose it is also possible that this is an attempt of Milton’s to represent an evolution of theology. Speaking of CS Lewis: Lewis believed that all Classical myth was composed of spiritual half-truths—like the ancient pagan faiths of the improperly-godded Classical peoples were reaching for that absolute truth of Christ, and were unable to because he hadn’t been born yet. According to Lewis, all these old faiths would ultimately be brought together under the umbrella of the Christian God’s single one. It’s one reason why Chronicles of Narnia is full of mythological beasts particular to the Greeks and Romans.

What do you mean, “what about the Jews? Weren’t the Jews around in ancient Rome? And at the time of ancient Greece for that matter?” Girl I don’t remember it’s been a minute and this is just me talking shit into the ether and I’m not even zooted right now

“…but familiar grown, I pleas’d, and with attractive graces won The most averse, thee chiefly, who full oft Thyself in me thy perfect image viewing Becam’st enamour’d, and such joy thou took’st With me in secret, that my womb conceiv’d A growing burden.

“Proshippers DNI/Sinatan shippers DNI”

Can we please appreciate “my womb conceiv’d/a growing burden.” That’s so pretty.

“Meanwhile War arose, And fields were fought in Heav’n; wherein remain’d (For what could else) to our Almighty Foe Clear Victory, to our part loss and rout Through all the Empyrean…

Back to the devil and his minions throwing in little asides about how great God is. Does this feel weird to you, too? It’s disingenuous. Every time you’re just about to accept the demons and hell-born as characters with full interior worlds, they give up on themselves. Characters should be selfish, self-oriented, self-protective. These characters keep stopping to bare their throats.

So why did these demons turn against God if they knew they were going to fail?

I mention this because Paradise Lost waffles about “free will” a lot. At first, I thought the devil mentioned “free choice” because “choice” was an inherently fallen concept, but then I remembered that Adam has a whole conversation with an angel and “free will” is uttered as a benefit.

Here’s a fun verse—one of many, they’re everywhere—that Milton was probably trying to invoke:

The Lord has made everything for its own purpose, even the wicked for the day of evil. Proverbs 16:4

That’s very cool. thanks God. Hey free will isn’t free if you brutally punish anyone who sticks a toe out of your arbitrary line you fucking asshole

“…down they fell Driv’n headlong from the Pitch of Heaven, down Into this Deep…

If you repeat this line out loud, it will heal you of all wounds. How do poets talk about this shit properly? I don’t have the language to describe why it’s good. It hurts, it’s so tasty. I started salivating like this was a delicious cookie. That delicious alliteration. Those hard d’s. HEA(D)long, then HEA(V)en. Soft f’s (fell, from). “Driv’n”, then “Heaven.” “Down” repeated twice, both times beginning a phrase. Long phrase, short phrase—the long fall, the hard stop; hard “d” to soft “v.” You can feel the drop.

I don’t know how to explain this so say it out loud ok

“…and in the general fall I also; at which time this powerful Key Into my hand was giv’n, with charge to keep These Gates for ever shut, which none can pass Without my op’ning.”

A woman who is also an opening. That’s really neat. Oh shit Jesus knocks down the gates of hell, right? Does this imply yet more rape or… yeeeeahhhhhh

Again, I’m struck by how the wicked are the tools of God as soon as the angels are. Why does Sin have to keep this key? What stops her from tossing that shit away? What stops her from opening the gates of Hell and leaving?

The glib answer is, “God does.” However, this wouldn’t be completely fair to say. Allegorical limitations apply here: Sin is not a full character.

Now, as Sin is a concept in this case, it’s like she’s transformed Satan into an allegorical concept by proxy: only by Sin might we allow Satan in. Nice.

It’s like… a tiny allegorical universe for a moment. A wee allegorical nugget.

“Pensive here I sat Alone, but long I sat not, ’til my womb Pregnant by thee, and now excessive grown Prodigious motion felt and rueful throes.

No. No I hate this. Stop

“At last this odious offspring whom thou seest Thine own begotten, breaking violent way Tore through my entrails…

remember Alien? Unfortunate

“…that with fear and pain Distorted, all my nether shape thus grew Transform’d: but he my inbred enemy…

I know we’re very grossed out but can we appreciate this use of the word “inbred” for a moment

“Forth issu’d, brandishing his fatal Dart Made to destroy: I fled, and cri’d out ‘Death’; Hell trembl’d at the hideous Name, and sigh’d From all her Caves, and back resounded ‘Death.’

Remember the “execrable shape” and the “miscreated Front”? I laughed about it, but Milton was being literal: what else could the devil say about Death? Death is a haze without meaningful form. Death can take whatever form he needs to do what he must. And, in this case, Death is greater than his father. He’s an anti-Jesus.

I also love the use of echo. The feeling of resignation and acceptance… just mwah, mwah.

“I fled, but he pursu’d (though more, it seems, Inflam’d with lust than rage) and swifter far, Me overtook—his mother!—all dismayed, And in embraces forcible and foul Engend’ring with me, of that rape begot These yelling Monsters that with ceaseless cry Surround me, as thou sawst, hourly conceiv’d And hourly born…”

Oh no. Oh no no no. Noooooo

So for the record, this is Death repeatedly raping Sin, who then gives birth to dogs on the hour, every hour, for the rest of eternity. Why dogs? Because nobody wants that.

Let’s take a step back from the allegory for a second, because we can. What did Sin do that was wrong? She was literally formed without choice. She had no choice in her nature and she had no choice in what happened to her. It’s debatable she wanted to fuck Satan. It is possible she did nothing but be born and ravished.

Yes I know she’s a concept, but she’s also playing a character here. If you didn’t want me to feel sorry for Sin you shouldn’t have made her a person. Also, the way Sin is being treated is considered an acceptable punishment. The devil characters, who can be treated purely as characters, are being punished by Milton in what he perceives as acceptable ways, and it’s arguable his audience would think similarly.

If God can treat the devils like this, there's no reason he can't treat us like this.

God is a fucking monster y’all. He’s the equivalent of every redneck who fantasizes about killing an Evildoer. Except then he MADE the Evildoer so he could purposely kill them. Worse than that: he made the Evildoer so he could make them suffer.

You ever see someone write so well they fuck up their own propaganda

“…with sorrow infinite To me, for when they list into the womb That bred them they return, and howl and gnaw My bowels, their repast; then burst forth Afresh with conscious terrors vex me ’round, That rest or intermission none I find.

Heeeyyyy are you supposed to feel sorry for Sin?

According to a quote of CS Lewis’ (from Wikipedia. Again, I’m not trying to do a great job here, I’m just fucking around, who even gives a shit), contemporaries of Paradise Lost would have known there were moments they were Supposed to Feel Certain Things, and that the Devil would be considered Bad right away, without any character-building whatsoever.

This is absolutely true. I’m coming to this slow realization that Paradise Lost exhibits traits of both modern narratives—where a character’s quality is SHOWN by their behavior, which includes their dialogue, which may not be trustworthy—and those of allegories, an older literary form. Allegories of the old days were far more straightforward, with characters written to be as one-dimensional and obvious as possible. Nobody wanted to be misunderstood.

However, this is also such a tone-deaf and willfully stupid take that I reject it in part. Look, Lewis was smart, but he would twist himself into a pretzel before he’d admit God could be a fucker: contemporary readers of this book definitely had problems with the devil’s part, and the devil’s complex qualities are part of the book’s draw. I’d argue that the devil is probably the only reason we’re still talking about Paradise Lost today—plenty of good shit was being written back in Milton’s day, and you have to dig to find it. Why did Paradise Lost not fall into a dark pit where only researchers go? It’s not because its first readers decided altogether to read it in a single manner most pleasing.

People are not monoliths guys. Movements are born and slow evolutions turned.

“Before mine eyes in opposition sits Grim Death my Son and foe, who sets them on, And me his Parent would full soon devour For want of other prey, but that he knows His end with mine involv’d; and knows that I Should prove a bitter Morsel, and his bane, When ever that shall be; so Fate pronounc’d.

This is simultaneously horrible, beautiful, and the most metal thing I’ve ever read.

Sin’s longing for cannibalism is the first overt sign of her interior monstrousness (unless she desired the incest, anyway).

This is a reminder to me that to appear ugly or distasteful was often used as a sign in old literature that someone is trash. It’s not a new concept. People confuse personal discomfort with truth all the time.

I am also reminded of the qualities of old allegorical literature. Dialogue wasn’t used to expand on a character’s inner world—it was used like an encyclopedia entry, to deliver clearcut information. The character was not a person, the character was a concept, and nobody was confused about that.

I just had an interesting thought: does Paradise Lost represent a kind of middle ground between older allegorical works and more modern character-driven works?

Wait, if she wishes she could eat Death, why did she stop him from fighting Satan

I mean, Death would win, but… I don’t know. A slave to the narrative? Yeah, probably an allegorical limitation. Allegorical symbols can’t break character or they cease being allegorical. This is one of their major limitations and it’s why writing an allegory that isn’t hamfisted is like scooping your eyes out with hot spoons. I’m starting to see how it’s unwise to just throw a random allegorical character in with a bunch of Normies: first, because they’re limited; they often can’t act like people. Second, what does that say about the rest of the narrative? It opens a can of worms. The artificial limitations of the devils suddenly becomes suspect. The allegory struggles to stretch beyond its tiny nugget prison.

“But thou O Father, I forewarn thee, shun His deadly arrow…”

Oh… ok :(

goofy-ass specter running at the devil with a goddamn arrow

I mean, it’ll work.

“…neither vainly hope To be invulnerable in those bright Arms, Though temper’d heav’nly, for that mortal dint, Save he who reigns above, none can resist.”

Every now and then, you get a hint as to how a word has evolved. Today, we think of “arms” as weaponry; here, Milton uses it to refer to “armor.” As for “dint”, it could go either as “blow, stroke” (the archaic reading, according to my dictionary) or as “force, power.” Also according to my dictionary, this is where “dent” came from (take this with a grain of salt lol).

I don’t know, it’s very cool.

She finish’d, and the subtle Fiend his lore Soon learned, now milder, and thus answer’d smooth.

I love the current-day connotations of the word “lore.” It makes this kind of funny.

Reading on, I’m honestly not sure if he believes Sin or not. You think you’d remembering fucking your brainchild. Then again, this is Hell; the characters exist in a weird between place. It’s possible that in the spirit world, concepts can be people… perhaps the nature of the spiritual is its adherence to the ideal (both ideal Wickedness and Holiness).

What makes this even harder to understand is: where does Milton intend for double-meaning and earnestness to reside? I ask because it was the style of allegories and parables to be rather straight-forward, as Lewis said. But these characters are sometimes almost modern, with clear snark and ulterior motives.

“Dear Daughter, since thou claim’st me for thy Sire, And my fair Son here showst me, the dear pledge Of dalliance had with thee in Heav’n, and joys Then sweet, now sad to mention, through dire change Befall’n us unforeseen, unthought of,

Smooth.

“…know I come no enemy, but to set free From out this dark and dismal house of pain,

Wait a minute. Is this where House of Pain got their name. IS THIS WHERE HOUSE OF PAIN

(I looked it up. It’s from HG Wells’ The Island of Dr. Moreau, which is just as weird.)

“Both him and thee, and all the heav’nly Host Of Spirits that in our just pretenses arm’d Fell with us from on high: from them I go This uncouth errand sole, with lonely steps to tread Th’ unfounded deep, and through the void immense To search with wand’ring quest…

“From there I go—this uncouth errand sole,” is what I’ll say when I’m heading out on errands from now on.

“…a place foretold Should be, and, by concurring signs, ere now Created vast and round, a place of bliss In the Purlieus of Heav’n…

I had to look up a word. “Purlieu” means “the ground on the edges of a forest, especially when partly subject to the same forest laws concerning game hunting, etc” or “the outskirts of any place; an adjacent district; the environs or neighborhood.”

I really like the implication of “at the edge of law.” That’s what God keeps coming down to—that’s what the book keeps coming back to: the battle between law and anarchy.

“…and therein plac’d A race of upstart Creatures…

fuck yeah. fuck you satan

“…to supply Perhaps our vacant room, though more remov’d, Least Heav’n surcharg’d with potent multitude Might hap to move new broiles…

I had to look up “broiles,” and in the process, discovered what may be the best dictionary of all time: Shakespeare’s Words.

“Broil” once meant “turmoil, confused fighting, battle.”

“…be this or aught Then this more secret now design’d, I haste To know, and this once known, shall soon return, And bring ye to the place where Thou and Death Shall dwell at ease…”

This section is so delicious.

First, Satan is schmoozing, 1000%. We only know this because he first talked shit to Death and Sin, and has now changed his tune. That said, it’s wildly unclear what his motivations are, half because he’s talking to literal allegorical figures. Once allegories get involved, they are stringently policed: neither Sin nor Death can be surprising to us. They will exhibit all the traits of their counterparts as understood by Milton’s version of Protestant Christianity. Their purpose is edification and education. An allegory is an encyclopedic entry given flesh.

Second, for what purpose does Satan offer these things? To pay them off? Probably. Does he offer them because he has grown a heart? No, probably not. Is he just offering what these characters want to hear? Probably. But, as you’ll soon see, he’s not lying. Does he know he’s not lying?

“…and up and down unseen Wing silently the buxom Air…

“Buxom” used to mean “lively, cheerful, bright,” not BIG OL TITTIES

“…embalm’d With odors; there ye shall be fed and fill’d Immeasurably, all things shall be your prey.”

We know, because we are inundated with Christianity in this country, that he’s telling the truth. He’s explaining that once Sin and Death are free, they’ll be free to feed on the Earth.

Is he telling what he perceives as truth, or is he promising pie in the sky?

If we were to be blitheringly flat, like Lewis, we’d recognize Satan’s speech as literal: he’s offering a promise he can keep; he understands what is going to happen before it ever happens. But because he’s complex, and started off his speech with flattery, I’m also not completely sure—I can only know by reading on and finding out if he spoke the truth.

Of equal interest: Satan is also doing right by his baby mama and weird fucking son. Sure, he’s talking shit, but he’s also taking responsibility.

Just. Kinda weird situation all told.

He ceas’d, for both seem’d highly pleas’d, and Death Grinn’d horrible a ghastly smile, to hear His famine should be fill’d, and blest his maw Destin’d to that good hour…

God I love this description. I love how Death contains “famine”, how he blesses his empty throat with promises of glut.

…no less rejoic’d His mother bad, and thus bespake her Sire. “The key of this infernal Pit by due, And by command of Heav’n’s all-powerful King I keep, by him forbidden to unlock These Adamantine Gates; against all force Death ready stands to interpose his dart, Fearless to be o’ermatched by living might.

One guy with one arrow versus everybody.

It’s all right, tell me how it goes

“But what owe I to his commands above Who hates me, and hath hither thrust me down Into this gloom of Tartarus profound, To sit in hateful Office here confin’d, Inhabitant of Heav’n, and heav’nly-born, Here in perpetual agony and pain, With terrors and with clamors compass’d round Of mine own brood, that on my bowels feed…

OH MY GOD SHE’S DOING IT

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

On that note: are you saying. That if God had maybe. Not been incredibly cruel to Sin. We may not have had Sin

Lewis would say something about how Sin had made her choice, and about how the brutalities wreaked against her were her own fault somehow, and that her nature was inherently wicked, so she would be wicked even when shown mercy. Then he'd end up with "it's an allegory anyway"

The problem with this is a) Christianity is about forgiving people who have committed some real humdingers, so this is logically dissonant, and b) so far, God hasn’t just punished: he has been nasty and cruel. The only love I have seen is between devils. If this is propaganda for God it’s not doing a very good job

“Thou art my Father, thou my Author, thou My being gav’st me; whom should I obey But thee, whom follow? Thou wilt bring me soon To that new world of light and bliss, among The Gods who live at ease, where I shall Reign At thy right hand voluptuous, as beseems Thy daughter and thy darling, without end.”

YES

Kinda weird but YES

Don’t take shit from that asshole lady he sucks

Thus saying, from her side the fatal Key, Sad instrument of all our woe, she took; And towards the Gate rolling her bestial train, Forthwith the huge Portcullis high up drew, Which but her self not all the Stygian powers Could once have moved… …So wide they stood, and like a Furnace mouth Cast forth redounding smoke and ruddy flame.

I just wanted to share this for the imagery. I love the imagery of a beautiful woman on a serpent’s tail, slipping slimy and bloody over the black earth, her body broken open in a hundred places where her hungry young have burst forth, and all around her the hellhounds loping. Then you can just feel the gates of Hell open and all I can think of is how I feel when I open the front door on a haboob.

“Redound” means “to fall out, contribute, turn out.”

Before their eyes in sudden view appear The secrets of the hoary deep, a dark Illimitable Ocean without bound, Without dimension, where length, breadth, and height, And time and place are lost; where eldest Night And Chaos, Ancestors of Nature, hold Eternal Anarchy, amidst the noise Of endless wars and by confusion stand.

Most of what I’m sharing here, I just LIKE. I like the image of Chaos and void. I love how it dwarfs Lucifer. I can feel the wind surging from that hot black egress. It probably switches back on itself—in direction, in temperature, in violence.

Also, I can't stop remembering that weird starlit void lurking below the surface world of Elden Ring.

...Into this wild Abyss, The Womb of nature and perhaps her Grave, Of neither Sea, nor Shore, nor Air, nor Fire, But all these in their pregnant causes mix’d Confus’dly, and which thus must ever fight, Unless th’ Almighty Maker them ordain His dark materials to create more Worlds, Into this wild Abyss the wary fiend Stood on the brink of Hell and look’d a while, Pondering his Voyage; for no narrow frith He had to cross.

“Frith” is an ancient word for “estuary.”

His Dark Materials is a book series. That phrase and the title of The Golden Compass originate from Paradise Lost. Speaking of which, I need to finish the series. From what I’ve read, the author had a bone to pick with CS Lewis, and I do approve of that.

Again, I love the imagery of this section, and that’s the only reason I’m sharing this. See, so far, Satan has been presented as a giant. He’s enormous. He’s powerful. But the chaos dwarfs him. Could absolutely swallow him. You believe in it as a dangerous place—a primordial place. It feels older than God.

Although the void here is technically allegorical, there’s worldbuilding here. This is an attempt at realism. The boundaries between allegorical and literal smear.

…At last his Sail-broad Vans He spreads for flight, and in the surging smoke Uplifted spurns the ground, thence many a League As in a cloudy Chair ascending rides Audacious, but that seat soon failing, meets A vast vacuity: all unawares Flutt’ring his pennons vain plumb down he drops Ten thousand fathom deep…

I had no idea that “vans” originated as a word for “wings.” For a brief, heady moment, I imagined Lucifer taking off in some cool fuckin kicks.

Here's where you see what I mean about action sequences: Milton is so damn good at making you feel the rough weather and envisioning weird spaces. "Surging smoke," "ascending rides/Audacious," "a vast vacuity."

...i love alliteration and action verbs. so much

…when straight behold the Throne Of Chaos, and his dark Pavilion spread Wide on the wasteful Deep; with him Enthron’d Sat Sable-vested Night, eldest of things, The consort of his Reign; and by them stood Orcus and Ades, and the dreaded name Of Demogorgon; Rumor next and Chance, And Tumult and Confusion all embroil’d, And Discord with a thousand various mouths.

Again, I just LOVE this. I’m trying to only share things I enjoy, but it’s so hard when the whole book sings.

"Wide on the wasteful deep." Mmmmfffffff f f f ffffffffffffff

"Sable-vested Night." You know, when people adjectivize nouns, usually I get mad, but this is gorgeous.

Had to include the bit about Discord because never before have I appreciated the name so well

“Yours be th’ advantage all, mine the revenge.”

Metal. Take whatever you want: I wanna fuck this guy over. (Satan absolutely said this.)

...Satan stay’d not to reply, But glad that now his Sea should find a shore, With fresh alacrity and force renew’d Springs upward like a Pyramid of fire Into the wild expanse…

One thing I like to imagine, especially when I see visual depictions of spectacular events, is wonder how the author came to envision them. As writers, we’re very lucky in this day and age that we can go look up videos and images and firsthand accounts of farflung events, and a lot of us take cues from film and television. Milton would have had a more limited palette.

What is more, not everyone can write an action sequence. Milton can. He understands that language is about feeling, not seeing.

It makes me wonder: what inspired the image of Satan’s launch? Fireworks? Comets? Lightning? The mere interplay with light out in the world?

“Glad now his Sea should find a shore” is a beautiful line and it’s about the devil allying with Chaos rofl

Send that one to your lover one day without explanation.

But now at last the sacred influence Of light appears, and from the walls of Heav’n Shoots far into the bosom of dim Night A glimmering dawn…

The sun is heaven confirmed

We're all gonna live in the sun someday

Oh wait I'm writing this.....

...im going to hell.......

…Satan with less toil, and now with ease Wafts on the calmer wave by dubious light And like a weather-beaten Vessel holds Gladly the Port, though Shrouds and Tackle torn; Or in the emptier waste, resembling Air, Weighs his spread wings, at leisure to behold Far off th’ Empyreal Heav’n, extended wide In circuit, undetermin’d square or round…

It’s fascinating to me that Heaven is seen right away as bending the laws of physics. A different writer whose name rhymes with "HP Lovecraft" would be like NON-EUCLIDEAN GEOMETRY

With Opal Tow’rs and Battlements adorn’d Of living Sapphire, once his native Seat; And fast by hanging in a golden Chain This pendant world, in bigness as a Star Of smallest Magnitude close by the Moon.

“This pendant world” "living Sapphire" UggghhhhHHH it’s so good

Imagine for a second: the peoples of this era already knew the Earth was round, but nobody had seen it from space yet.

Milton could fully envision it—like a jewel hanging in the sky.

What I don’t understand is “the golden chain.” It may be literal lol

Thither full fraught with mischievous revenge, Accurst, and in a cursed hour he hies.

This is a word-by-word account of my green-cheek conure flying into a plate of mashed potatoes.

To Be Continued

[silver-studios]

Okay I keep writing comments for gravity of tempered grace in my head and then getting distracted before I can actually post them so I'm just. going to comment here instead because it's in front of me now

First: WOW you write so fast. This isn't actually like, important, but still. I am in awe

I love Izuna's cousin. "Suffer with me" he is exactly the kind of cousin Izuna (and really all of these characters) deserves. Also can't WAIT to see if Tobirama ends up finding that copy of his paper and assuming that if Izuna has it, that must mean he understands it and Tobirama can talk theoretical physics with him. I'm sure Izuna would have the FUNNIEST things to say to his cousin for causing that.

I also enjoy the chapter titles and how they tie in to each chapter. And the explanations for each of them, because I would NOT know what most of them are on my own at all.

I also like the butterfly effect/plot in general, how Tobirama got surprised by things changing in response to his changes, and now he doesn't really know what's coming even though the extra knowledge is still really useful. Can't wait to see what happens with that Nara he saved, and whether there's more fallout from the Uchiha invading.

I don't have a lot specific to say about the Hatake scenes, but I enjoyed them a lot! All the worldbuilding is fun, and very interesting.

Tobirama's characteization is also great and I love... all of it, honestly, but in particular deciding to just get a few graduate degrees on the side while he's with the Uzumaki, and his solution to people possibly not being loyal to Hashirama (even if I would also like to shake sense, or maybe just an iota of self preservation, into him for that last one).

Also while I am not the anon that asked about inspiration originally it was that ask that reminded me that oh yeah I had stuff to say, and actually I HAD heard Non-Stop... a few months ago probably? and went "this is Tobirama and Izuna exactly." So you are not alone!

Yeah I try to maintain a personal deadline so I never hit that point of losing interest because it's happened in the past. It really helps to develop a detailed outline beforehand for the whole story. Recently I've been trying to outline chapters before I write them too to see how that works for me.

I love the vision of reticent and usually quiet Tobirama just rambling about his interests. I think it'd catch Izuna off guard a little but he'd probably find it cute once he can admit that to himself. I also headcanon the Uchiha as being attracted to competency so I'm sure that'll kick in sooner or later.

I'm glad you like the chapter titles and explanations! I thought it'd be a fun way to tie everything together especially with a scientist protagonist. It's been really fun but as the story gets longer than anticipated I'm nervous about running out of relevant topics to reference lol.

The Nara will definitely be back once his clan stops mourning the death of his father. It's great that people still remember him.

It's been such a blast to dive into the worldbuilding with this fic a little bit because Naruto has such fascinating lore that wasn't explored. My biggest struggle is making sense of just how modern the time period is because it seems like the Edo period but then 60 years later Naruto has a fridge and television so who knows really. I'm making it up as I go.

Sorry for rambling a little bit but I get really excited whenever I receive a long message and it's always a delight for me to respond. Thank you so much for the ask and for reading my story!

[nogenderbee]

Yandere Alphabet: N, O, R, T, U

Characters: Mafuyu Asahina, Ena Shinonome

Sure! I actually had some fun writing these ^^ so hope you like it as well!

♡˗ˏ✎*ೃ˚ 𝕐𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕖 ℕ, 𝕆, ℝ, 𝕋, 𝕌 ₊˚ˑ༄

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ Mafuyu, Ena N, O, R, T, U yandere alphabet

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ TW: unhealthy obsession, mentions description of killing, mentions of tortures, jealousy, possessiveness, bullying

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ @bleachtheidiot @prsk-krow @hearts4gf @badwhole @qxmmi @modyuki @bl4cktourmaline

✧ Non stop = How clingy they'll be when you're in relationship? How possessive are they? And how much free space do they give you?

Mafuyu is extremely clingy and possessive!! She won't exactly be hugging you all the time but she'll simply walk with you whenever she gets the ocassion. And let me tell you, her school, mom or anyone worn ever stop her from making sure your well and only hers. She sometimes doesn't let you go a step away from her because she's immidietly following you.

She won't stop you from walking wherever you want, unless that place seems dangerous to her... so that's already some kind of freedom! You can see her as your bodyguard really.

But if you need some space, you can only get it at home. She understands but she also won't take any risk. She'll allow for you to stay at home and rest but once you get outside, she'll follow you once she sees you.

"Why are you so persistent on walking alone? Do you not know how many dangers await for you? I'm just here to make sure you're safe."

✧ Other = Someone else speaks or flirts with you, how will they react?

Mafuyu becomes more on guard when someone comes just to talk with you. She still has to keep her "good girl" act up but she'll do her best to make the person understand you're busy so that you can focus back on her.

And if someone flirts with you? They must have a death wish... she doesn't care about her "good girl" act then and of it's just you two and the flirt, she may even kill them on your very eyes if she'll have to. So if you want them to live, here's a tip: make them understand no as soon as you can, even be harsh with them, it's gonna be better than what the purple haired girl is planning either way...

"It's not my fault they can't understand basic boundaries. If they didn't wanted to end like that, they should've accepted 'no' you gave them."

✧ Risk = How risky will they be with getting rid of rivals?

Surprisingly Mafuyu would not care at all. She's good at almost all school subjects, that includes chemistry and biology too! And from there, it's easy way to go.

Of course she still does basic things like getting her rival into more private place but let me tell you, while stabbing them, it's like she gets all her trauma out on them.

But somehow she still was never found... maybe it's because she knows all the liquids that are good for wiping all the blood or? Or maybe she knows where to cut to not make bit mess? Or maybe it's just luck? She couldn't care less... as long as she can keep danger away from your, she doesn't mind.

"My, my... it seems Y/N is like a magnet for danger... they're lucky I'm here to stop that."

✧ Type = What type of Yandere are they?

Mafuyu is the overprotecte type of yandere. She thinks that this world is too cruel and has too many dangerous for someone as sweet as you, she even see simple greeting as a potential threat to you.

She also sees you a bit like a pure angel and despite her being unable to feel emotions, you broke that and made her feel strong connection and desire towards you and your love, so she set it as her goal to protect you from everything in return.

"You don't have to worry about any dangers... I'm not going anywhere unless you want me to after all."

✧ Unsure = How much trust they have in you? What happens if you break it?

Mafuyu's trust will depend on your past relationship, if you never or rarely lied and tries to trick her, she'll have trust for you! But if you lied a lot... she won't take her eye off you for a single second. But it's also kind of easy to convince her to give you a second chance, you'd just have to promise her to change and behave for few days and you can be sure her trust will he restored.

But one thing that can shatter her trust completely and almost irreversibly is you running away from her or cheating on her. When it happens, she may go as far as even hurting you badly, she won't kill you but you can be sure it'll hurt as hell once she gets to you. It's just her way of making sure you'll remember to never make that mistake again.

"You were so full of yourself back then... it's not so funny now, when your life is in my hands, is it?"

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

✧ Non stop = How clingy they'll be when you're in relationship? How possessive are they? And how much free space do they give you?

Ena is both but she's still a bit more clingy than possessive. She'll always hold you arm as you walk and don't you even think of sitting anywhere than next to her unless you have different classes, that's the only exception she'll make.

As for her possessiveness, it actually applies to her clinging a little bit... she does that as a way of letting everyone know you're taken by her and makes sure no one will came up to you with wrong intentions.

Also, say goodbye to your free space because you're getting none of it with her on your side. She wants to be next to you 24/7 and that includes when you're at home too! That's why you have sleepovers so often actually...

"So are you coming to my place for tonight? I made sure to get your favorite sweets and movie ready... you literally have no reason to decline it~"

✧ Other = Someone else speaks or flirts with you, how will they react?

As previously mentioned, Ena is really clingy and possessive so it's enough you take your attention off of her for 5 minutes and she's already all pouty.

And when it's cause by someone purposely talking with you? That's like starting a fight with her. She wants your attention on herself and her alone! So you can just imagine the death stares she gives the person talking with you. And if they're flirtinf with you? She immidietly starts a verbal fight and if it turns into physical fight only depends how quickly they'll give up.

She gives the talking person no more than 5 minutes to leave, and after 3 minutes she even starts having problems... but you can make her patience last 10 minutes if you make sure to give her lots of attention despite talking with someone!

"It's time for us to go! We have no time for talking with someone like them!!"

✧ Risk = How risky will they be with getting rid of rivals?

Ena is actually really caucious, she's not fond of doing dirty work to get rid of rivals so instead she'll speed nasty rumors and create some alt accounts so she can ruin them mentally.

She can really spend lots of time just collecting fake or real pictures that'll make their life slowly become hell. But of course she acts as if it has nothing to do with her and if you happen to contont her, she'll even act like she's scared and worried about both of you... when she knows well it'll never actually happen.

"Im so scared Y/N... What if they go after me...? Or you for that matter!"

✧ Type = What type of Yandere are they?

Ena is possessive and a bit of clingy type of yandere. She definitely won't be happy when you're hanging out with anyone other than her and she hardly ever let's anyone stay close to you.

And when it comes to clinginess... she won't let you go, EVER. Be prepared to spend eternity with her because there's absolutely no way she'll ever let you go anywhere alone, even your house. She'll demand face time even if you both will just sleep, it's her way of staying close to you despite the distance.

"I think you're forgetting yourself! I never said we're separating... call me right now, I want to talk with you while you're walking back!"

✧ Unsure = How much trust they have in you? What happens if you break it?

Ena actually has a lot of trust in you, she'd trust you with her life! Her clinginess and possessiveness is not because she's afraid you'll leave her, it's caused because she knows you're amazing person and others may want to take you away from her. That's why she doesn't leave your side, but she won't actually check your phone to see if you're not cheating on her because she filly trusts you!

But once you break her trust... it will be almost impossible to rebuild it. Of course it depends what you do but considering it would probably be running away or cheating, she'd begin to keep much more closer look at you and will always take a sneak peak through your shoulder when you're texting. She also becomes more clingy... now calls are NOT the way out, you have no choice but be next to her in person ALL THE TIME.

"If you didn't do that, I'd had no need to check it. Now c'mon, open your messages! I want to see them all!"

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

[i-suc-at-art]

Day 6: immortal

Ik this isn’t exactly danny phantom but it’s my dp oc so id like to think it counts.. This also is something i’ve had in the google doc vault for like ages lol it takes place during beyond batman, i was eventually going to have danny join the story but this is only the first part so don’t come for me that danny isn’t in this.. I still think it’s good writing so take pitty on my and read it pretty please 🥺🥺

“We have a ghost problem in Gotham” Terry says

“I don’t think so.. I’ve seen everything, Zombies, vampires, only one ghost though..”

“A real ghost?” Terry asks while sitting on the desk, Bruce was repairing the Suit sitting down in a chair.

“She was a half ghost but yes. She was once the ward of Vlad masters, she came to Gotham when she was 17, the two of them weren’t on good terms.”

“Woah, rich kid huh?”

“Didn’t act like it, but she was dangerous, vindictive too. She didn’t love that i wasn’t willing to go the extra mile in stopping bad guys” Bruce continues working on the suit not looking up

“Freaky.. Wait, wouldn’t she be like 40 by now?”

Bruce looks up at Terry and sighs. He stands walking over to the bat computer “Computer bring up file on Clover Morte.”

“Clover Morte, previous identities unknown, alias: Reaper, Age:17, metahuman powers: increased strength, intangibility, invisibility, increased sight, flight, overshadowing, ghostly fire, immortality, other powers unknown.”

“Do you know where she is? or how to find her?”

“I have a few ideas, you worry about the bad guys, i’ll worry about finding the ghost who haunts Gotham.”

“Right.” Terry puts on his suit and heads out in the batmobile.

Bruce steps into the middle of the small graveyard in Park Row, his cane hitting an inground plaque he side steps to not stand on the grave.

“My eyes must be deceiving me! Is that the one and only Bruce Wayne? The living ghost?” A voice asks from the shadows

“I could say the same about you Reaper.” Bruce turns to where he heard the voice

“Ain’t nobody called me that, not in a long time..” Clover says landing silently in front of Bruce

“You still look good for 37..” He smirks down at the young ghost, her body still looking 17

“You look good too, for a dead guy.” A burst of fire lights from her hand as she passes Bruce patting him on the shoulder with her non burning hand “So, whatcha need? There’s no way you’d see me just to visit.”

“You ever talked to your Dad before he passed?” Bruce follows her and Clover slows her pace so they can walk side by side

“Vlad? Oh no he’s alive and well, he’s also a halfa, naturally created halfas age slower than humans, but they age.” She pauses and opens up a decently sized mausoleum to have a dry place for the two to talk.

“Ah.. That’s good to know that Mr. Masters is alive, still, that bastard’s probably going to live longer than Mcginnis.”

“You’re the one who's going to outlive us all Bruce..” She steps further in motioning for him to follow “So that’s your new ward? Or maybe the new Batman that I've been hearing whispers about?” Clover pulls up a chair for Bruce to sit, clearly she had made this some sort of home. A cot bed in the corner, a couple empty takeout containers sit in a trash bag, looking around Bruce is seriously considering offering Clover a room

“Perceptive as ever. You know you should really talk to Vlad before it’s too late.”

“I mean we’ve talked, he knows I'm alive.. well half alive, but still. He understands that my place is here. Though I haven’t seen him in about 3 or 4 years now, I'm really thinking about it..” She pauses and looks at Bruce, his eyes darting around inspecting the room

“I don’t need a room Bruce. This is my haunt, take me away from it and I won’t hesitate to bring your spirit here myself.” She glares at him and he can’t tell if she’s being serious or not.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” He sighs, eyes focusing back on the ghost girl. She lights a couple of small torches on the walls with the fire from her hand. A bright green ring glows around her waist; it splits and starts to change her body, her hair falling from its fiery ponytail, to equally fiery red hair that reaches her shoulders, her bangs black and eyes a bright green. She now looks to be 17 or 18 but her face looks just as aged as someone in their late twenties. Her eyes suckin in, mouth positioned in a frown, she looks troubled. Bruce can tell she isn’t hiding it either.

“Ok, spit it out.. you didn’t just come here to pass along fatherly advice, and exchange pleasantries.”

“Mcginnis says we have a ghost problem. But i’m not so sure. It seems to..” Bruce pauses searching for the right words “high school to be a real ghost.”

“What do you want me to do? Play high school?” She crosses her arms and leans against one of the walls

“That might be a good idea.. Mcginnis does need someone out there who I trust helping him learn the ropes.”

Clover sighs “My guy.. I was joking, I'm not going back to school. Last time it was kinda a hellhole.”

“I’m sure it gets lonely here..” Bruce says

“One; that was out of pocket, two; Jason visits quite often ok?” she pauses “I know what you're doing.. I quite enjoy my simple life I've carved for myself so why don’t you stop trying to carve your dick into it.” She glares her green eyes turning a bright blue for a moment

“It would be good to get to know your peers.” He continues to push her buttons

“Oh yeah, like I'll be able to connect with a bunch of teens who were just sperm when I started my haunt.” She rolls her eyes

“It would be nice to have an inside man. Dont adult actors play teens all the time?” He questions.

She sighs, “If you stop nagging I’ll give you one week. When we get this figured out and I'm back in this graveyard. If you make me stay any longer I swear I will make good on my threat.”

Bruce just nods then sticks out his hand for a handshake, clover grasps it tightly “Death.. I can’t believe that worked..” She balls up her fist and hits it to her forehead.

[antialiasis]

Groundhog Dave, the 16k-word Morphic time loop extra, is finally up on TCoD. If you've been following this blog for a while, you may have seen me intermittently talk about it. Long story short, Dave is trapped in a time loop on the day of chapter 13, and we explore how he responds and unravels.

Content warnings: This is a whump fic. It features some strong violence including gun violence, suicide and suicidal thoughts, brief vomiting, a deluge of strong and demeaning language, consumption of alcohol, heavy emotional distress, existential horror, and a whole lot of children dying.

Some rambling below the cut about how it came to be and my favorite bits in it.

The first inkling of this story was when I saw someone in the Groundhog Day tag on Tumblr writing a Newsies time loop fanfic titled Groundhog Dave. I have never seen Newsies and have no idea who that Dave is, but I think of Morphic Dave every time I see the name, so instantly I pictured Dave in a time loop on the day of chapter 13, and I could not stop intermittently thinking about it. Eventually, I started writing it.

I don't remember the process of beginning to write it super well, but I remember waiting for a coach at Port Authority with Negrek after seeing the actual Groundhog Day musical and typing up the bit in the third iteration where Dave rages at God on my phone, which was definitely one of the earliest bits I thought of. I know that for a while, what I had written up in the document was the first four iterations and a bit: the original, the one that more or less spawns the Dave and Mia Discuss Family AU, the one where he snaps and gets himself killed, the one where he wakes up after that and decides he can experiment and figure this out, and the summary of his next few goes. I know the document was stuck there for a while, with intermittent tinkering and vague ideas but nothing really in the way of writing progress. On August 12th 2021, I posted in the Thousand Roads Discord about how I'd just written an entire NaNo day's worth of Groundhog Dave, and I'm quite sure there I was referring to the scene where Dave is at the hospital, fails to shoot himself to end the loop, and talks with Cheryl. In 2023, I started doing regular sprints working on it (thanks, Negrek), which was what finally got me past the finish line; before that, the document stood at about 8500 words, while it ended up at about 16500 (though with some bits and notes at the bottom).

The actual ending went through a series of iterations as I was working on it. My first idea for an ending for it was just a cruel, "He does finally fix everything and all the kids live, and then he goes to bed and wakes up in the canon timeline, because he cannot have nice things." This wasn't a super satisfying idea, of course, by itself. I went back and forth through various possibilities from there over the story's development time. At one point or another I considered different variations on whether he does manage to stay in a Better Timeline or whether he ends up back in the canon one at the end, how exactly the loop ends up breaking (initially I was genuinely thinking the loop would break one way or another once nobody dies and the Character Development would have to be leading up towards that, but later I realized it was actually tastier if he does manage it and the loop just keeps going anyway; the precise nature of the Character Development involved was also a bit back and forth), and whether the whole thing would be completely unexplained in the vein of Groundhog Day itself or if I would make more ambiguous use of Lucy's recurring penchant for being involved with bizarre supernatural happenings in non-canon extras.

I'm pretty satisfied with what I did end up with, at any rate. My first inkling of the Lucy thing was just sort of ending with ambiguous Lucy, and I wasn't sure that would really work, but it felt a lot more appropriate to actually do that once Lucy tied more into his overall character development - the couple of early iterations where he takes things out on her specifically as if it's her fault or she should have intervened, his general guilt about actually using her to intervene, the repeated conversations in the car where she manages to confront him at the right moment with why he's so mean, him managing to choose to let go and not be an ass to her in the final scene. I'm also pleased with what I landed on with the several different things happening for the first time in the final iteration: him actually mustering the ability to articulate how much he needs the kids for his life to be worth anything, and affirming that he'll keep doing it even if he'll never get to live in the good timelines, and being forced to confront the ways in which he's been cruel and unpleasant to the kids despite how much they mean to him and choose not to, and finally being able to express an honest vulnerable emotion to Jean, accept her offer for emotional support and ask her to stay up with him because he needs that. Something just feels a lot stronger to me about it with a greater degree of ambiguity about the end of the loop, no one single obvious switch that's the thing like someone was dutifully waiting for him to just say this one magic word. (Similarly, what exactly Lucy did in fact have to do with this, if anything, had to be ambiguous. The loop cannot be a concrete phenomenon with a clear singular cause, or it would have just felt wrong. I have realized I have strong feelings on when fiction should be deliberately ambiguous, not because there is a concrete truth that the author is arbitrarily concealing to force you to guess, but because one way or another establishing any concrete truth would detract or distract from the story being told.)

Some little things I enjoy in this story:

Dave's increasingly frazzled awakenings in the first few loops just really tickle me.

Him knocking on the door, then realizing Cheryl heard his sky-rant and just immediately turning around to go on an ill-advised suicide mission to the church rather than have to try to explain that to her amuses me greatly. What a timeline.

My favorite bit of said suicide mission is actually the bit where he's lying there dying and manages to spend that time being restlessly, angrily impatient about how long it's taking and grasping hard for some sense of satisfaction in having killed this stranger, without ever managing it. The most pathetic possible suicidal rampage of revenge.

The hospital bathroom scene is still my favorite scene in the whole thing. It presses my particular whump buttons extremely hard, and it's just extremely representative of Dave and his problems, him mercilessly bullying himself and Cheryl trying very genuinely to reach out to him and let him know he's not alone while he compulsively rejects it, adamant that he doesn't need anyone or anything even though he's acutely suffering, resenting her for it and shooting back at her efforts with pointless, uncalled-for sarcasm. It also has some of my very favorite lines: "There was a knock on the door and he lowered the gun quickly, like a kid caught playing with something he shouldn't," "What the actual fuck did she think he was doing in here," "Still there?" answered irritably with, "There's only one door. Do the math," when he came so, so close to not in fact still being there. So fond of it.

The offhand unelaborated upon mention that Dave has at one point or another read enough to not bungle a suicide by gunshot is extremely some precise button that I have.

I'm also deeply fond of the iteration where Gabriel dies. Dave tries so hard to force himself to decide he can live with that and just decidedly does not succeed. I enjoy him sitting there irritably thinking maybe they should have just done this in the first place when the others attempt to safely reach the police, silently pretty much convinced that would have been a better idea and thinking all this could have been avoided (but without actually consciously admitting to having been wrong, of course), only to immediately go, "He'd always known this was a bad idea. Why'd he even fucking let them?" when the consequences come knocking. You fucking let them because you thought it was probably a good idea at the time, Dave.

I really enjoy how much Dave cares about the kids, can't not care about the kids, while most of the kids have a hard time grasping how much he cares because he's so persistently Like That. Loved to write the multiple times Jack viciously accuses him of not caring about Gabriel, and the way Dave's idea of disabusing him of the notion is just to be an asshole to him, because he's incapable of expressing sincere emotional sentiment. Lucy, similarly, keeps probing him about what he's going to do if the loop doesn't stop, and he just keeps answering in evasive, defensive irritation as if she's challenging him somehow, until he finally manages to realize that no, she was worried that if his efforts wouldn't end the loop he might just stop bothering. (Only then he's finally been driven far enough to actually manage a smidge of emotional honesty.)

Similar recurring horrible dramatic irony I enjoyed: Dave hates Jean's evolved form so, so horribly much when it's just a hypothetical manifestation of Something Horrible Happening To Her that he's trying to stop and not what his daughter really looks like. One of the things that only quite felt right when I'd finally landed back on him ending up in the canon timeline was that he then actually has to confront the cruelty of that with himself and affirm his unconditional love for her, instead of being 'rewarded' with the cuter, unevolved Jean.

I always get a kick out of how relatively easily Dave in nonsenscial situations just slides from adamant atheism into antitheism without a pause. He's perfectly genuine about thinking God doesn't exist, of course, but there is a level on which he kind of wants him to, just so he can face him and walk backwards into Hell, and as a result you get these situations where he sort of entertains the idea far more easily than he rationally should given his priors. The yelling at God about why he isn't curing malaria instead of whatever this is is pretty unique to the very particular mental state he's in on that iteration, but the multiple times he offhandedly thinks maybe this is literally Hell are total nonsense in his professed belief system but nonetheless a place where his mind is just inclined to go.

Meanwhile, I also enjoy the bit where Mia gets him to contemplate that he might be experiencing proof that souls exist - but he's less willing to entertain that in the same way because it doesn't have the same emotional valence for him, so it's not something that properly occurred to him before that, and then he just throws up his hands and moves on.

Thanks if you read it! I would love to hear any thoughts on it.