#also i’m like Decently sure based on the wording of everything that he was slightly fired

[dear-ao3]

GUENTHER STEPPED DOWN AS PRINCIPAL NOOOO

I KNOW ITS A SAD DAY TO BE A HAAS FAN

i hope he fok smashed the door on the way out

[ilyrafe]

𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒍𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 ✧ 𝒓. 𝒄.

pairing: rafe cameron x f!reader

warnings: brief sexual innuendo, rafe being a softie!!!!

word count: 2.6k (i *might* have gotten carried away i'm so sorry lol)

a/n: this is a sequel to late night and also based on this, so thanks @keziahcore ! your mind is literally everything!

it’s almost like a sixth sense.

rafe feels your absence from the bed, and immediately becomes agitated. he turns on the lamp next to his bed and looks for any sign that you’re still there, and finds your small handbag on the armchair, which makes him just slightly relieved. 

when he looks at the clock, he sees that it is almost two in the morning. the bathroom door is ajar and the lights are off, which means you’re not there. before he can leave his room looking for you, you return, holding a glass of water, wearing only his shirt to cover yourself up.

“where were you? why did you leave me here?”

he can’t control this agony, this anguish that always catches him off guard when he finds himself alone. he can’t help feeling like a time bomb, ready to explode at any moment. the smallest things you do seem to trigger him massively, and he hates that. he hates that he ends up being rude and harsh to you, because you’re always so understanding and sweet.

even he knows he doesn’t deserve you.

“i was thirsty and went downstairs to drink some water.” your tone is sweet and calm, which makes him feel like shit.

his face changes, as he seems to calm down. you didn’t leave him, you just went to get some water. you’re there, your stuff is there, you’re not going anywhere.

“next time, leave a glass here. i don’t like it when you do that.” he says in a much softer tone, but he’s still upset that his sleep got interrupted.

“do what? get hydrated?” you joke, trying to lighten up his mood.

he rolls his eyes and huffs. don’t make him tell the truth.

“go back to bed. i’m tired, alright? i had a long day.”

“actually, i was going to read a book. i’m not sleepy and i don’t want to lie down right now.”

is it so hard to understand that he wants you to be close to him so that he feels safe enough to get a decent night’s sleep?

“you can read on the bed.”

“you won’t mind the lamp on?”

“no, just get the damn book and come back to bed.”

you laugh and nod, picking up the book from his desk and following him to his bed. rafe gets to his spot and as you sit down, he places one hand on your bare thigh and falls back to sleep almost immediately.

while he dives deep into his necessary rest, you start reading. it’s that book, in cold blood by truman capote. you don’t know if rafe is a reader, he never really talks about books with you.

every once in a while, you look down at your thighs to see his hand, firmly holding you, to make sure you won’t leave. this small gesture makes you feel stupid. stupid to believe he might feel something other than lust for you. rafe makes you question your beliefs and that itself makes you feel overwhelmed.

sometimes you want to leave, but you can’t bring yourself to do it. and you have tried countless times. he’s good for you in the same intensity he’s bad. to say you’re scared to ask him what you are would be an understatement, but you just would like some clarification, because you don’t beg the people you’re casually fucking to stay the night almost every night and throw a tantrum when they leave to get some water.

deep down, you know you’re more scared to hear you’re just an easy fuck. at this point, this would tear you apart.

being with rafe is a challenge. it’s like running a marathon you know you will not get to the finish line, and yet, you keep running.

when it’s almost four in the morning, you close the book and turn the lamp off. finally, sleep comes to you, and you settle into his bed, still holding rafe’s hand, which never left your thigh. with the touch, rafe wakes up, and this time he is no longer agitated.

“sorry, didn’t mean to wake you.” you say, as you snuggle into the mattress.

“you- what time is it?” he asks, adorably confused and sleepy.

“it’s almost four.”

“and you’re going to sleep now?”

“yeah. go back to sleep, it’s early.” you say softly, placing a hand on his cheek, and he complies, pulling you close.

(...)

rafe’s alarm clock rings promptly at seven in the morning. he turns it off and goes back to his previous position: hugging you.

your hair smells like coconut and your skin is always soft. he never wants to not be touching you. it’s like your body was made to be next to his. for some reason, just your presence is enough to make him feel calm and at peace.

he places the softest kiss on your shoulder, enjoying the quietness that only early mornings can give him. the sweet sound of birds chirping outside makes him forget about everything else. rafe only has you in his mind (and in his arms).

you wake up and soon turn to face him. rafe has the most adorable sleepy face, and you might never stop melting over him. seeing him up close will never not be amazing. he’s the most handsome man you’ve ever seen. he probably has the most beautiful shade of blue in his eyes.

“go back to sleep.” he whispers.

“‘m not sleepy anymore.” you mumble as you rub your eyes, which rafe finds captivating. “hi.”

“hi,” he smiles. “you only slept for three hours, sleep some more.” he insists, and you feel a tone of concern in his voice, but maybe it’s just your sleep giving you that impression.

“i’m okay, rafey.”

rafey. he hates that stupid nickname, but when it comes out of your mouth, he wants to legally change his name to it.

“you’re gonna be tired.”

“no, i’m not. i don’t normally sleep a lot.”

rafe frowns not because he’s confused - he obviously isn’t. he’s just not liking what you’re saying. he doesn’t like the idea of you struggling with whatever that may be. rafe knows damn well how bad it is to be sleep deprived, he doesn’t want you going through that.

“you have insomnia?”

“i guess i do,” you shrug. “i don’t really know. i just don’t sleep a lot. i wish i did, though. i get so jealous when i see you sleeping for hours on end.” you smile sweetly at him. “you’re so relaxed. must be nice…”

you let go of rafe after leaving a timid kiss on his lips, and stretch before getting up and going to his bathroom to start your morning routine.

after a quiet breakfast, rafe gives you a ride home, and he can’t hide his concern about what you said.

“i’ll see you around, yeah?” you tell him, with the sweetest smile you always have.

“of course. uh, about that sleep thing… if you need help with that… i’m here.”

“rafe, i think you might be a sex addict.” you joke, really not understanding what he meant. he isn’t talking about sex. the one time he isn’t talking about sex, you don’t get it.

“well, i’m just one call away.”

you chuckle and intend to kiss his cheek, but rafe is quick enough to turn his face and make you kiss his lips. you laugh at his antics.

silly rafe is your favorite. if only other people got to see this side of him.

he watches you leave his car and get inside your home. the strange feeling of loneliness comes back almost immediately, but it gets him thinking. it has to be some sort of irony that the person that quite literally helps him sleep isn’t sleeping.

(...)

only two days have passed and rafe already needs you to spend the night at his house again. he is so tired and exhausted. he takes out his phone and quickly types a message.

rafe: are u busy right now? can i pick u up?

you don’t tend to take long to respond to his texts, but this time, an hour goes by and nothing, so rafe starts to feel that unbearable anguish again, and starts to think that you left him and that you found someone better to spend you time with.

impulsively, rafe facetimes you, and you answer. from your face alone, he can see the tiredness in your eyes. or rather, in your dark circles. you’re in your bedroom, which makes him feel calmer.

“hi, rafey. sorry, i just got my phone.”

“what are you doing?”

“i’m studying for my exams.”

“i just wanted to know if i could pick you up.”

“i’d love to,” you smile. “but it’s not a good idea, i need to study and i have a mountain of books to read until tomorrow if i want a good grade, which i do.”

“you’re tired, you should rest.” he advises, visibly worried.

“nothing a can of red bull can’t fix.” you say showing him the can.

“y/n, please go to sleep.”

something about his request makes you angry. maybe it’s the stress, or the fact that this time rafe is right.

“rafe, you’re not my boss. i need to hang up, i got shit to do.”

before he can protest, you hang up the call, and surprisingly, rafe doesn’t get angry. this is what it’s like when he’s sleep deprived.

as always, rafe wants to take control of the situation, so he puts on a hoodie, grabs his car keys and leaves his house to go to yours. it’s late at night, and rafe knows your parents are probably asleep.

the path is short, and soon he arrives in front of your house and the light is on in your bedroom, which tells him that you are still up. carefully, rafe gets out of his car and walks to the back of your residence, and climbs the wall, always making sure he doesn’t get caught by anyone. finally, rafe gets on the small balcony of your room and sees you surrounded by papers, books and notebooks. it’s a mess.

he knocks on the glass door, which startles you, but you soon calm down when you see it’s him. you almost run to open the door, but your face isn’t the happiest.

“what are you doing here, rafe?”

“nice to see you, too.” he ironizes as he steps inside your bedroom. “i have a proposition for you.”

“i’m so not in the mood, rafe…”

“listen to me.” he says. “i’ll… i’ll help you out with this stuff, as long as you let me help you sleep.”

“i don’t wanna have sex.”

“i’m not talking about sex.”

oh.

“you mean… sleep? like, really sleep?”

“yeah. i don’t like that you sleep so little. you’re becoming cranky.”

you chuckle at the last bit. you can’t stay mad at him, can you?

“that’s a nice offer, rafe, but what do you know about biology?”

“i’ll have you know i was a good student.” he pouts and you laugh. “even if i don’t know what you’re studying, i’ll help you out.”

it takes you a few seconds, but it’s decided. your body is about to give out, you really need to rest. you can’t absorb any more information. a good sleep might even help you learn whatever you need.

“okay.”

rafe smiles and it might be the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen.

you begin to organize all your notes and books on your desk and rafe begins to undress down to his underwear, and gets comfortable on your bed. he realizes this is his first time sleeping on your bed, and he already likes the faint smell of rosemary that your bedroom exudes.

you have such a pretty bedroom. the walls are painted in the softest shade of blue, and you have books everywhere. no wonder you’re so smart, you read a lot.

the wooden furniture gives an earthy feel to your room, contrasting with the delicacy of the light blue walls. in the photos of the small mural on the wall, rafe realizes that he wanted to be there, present in the photos, and maybe, in a photo with you. you are always smiling and being hugged by someone, or hugging them. you are like that, you are magnetic.

you finish organizing your things and quickly change into a shirt of rafe’s that you hope he doesn’t recognize. it’s big and comfortable, and it makes you feel close to him when he’s far away.

the lamp next to your bed is on, so you turn off the main light in your room and go to your bed, meeting rafe, and he has the smallest smile on his lips. it’s ironic how having sex and being naked doesn’t feel as intimate as simply sleeping together does.

“are your parents home?” he asks.

“no, why?”

“so i could have come through the door, huh.”

“yeah.” you laugh.

a brief moment of silence sits between you two, as you’re staring at each other’s eyes. rafe is mesmerized and terrified at the same time. this - whatever this is - feels so nice and so foreign. he knows damn well he isn’t one to want to just sleep with someone, let alone climb up a wall to just sleep with someone.

rafe cameron is in love, and he is utterly terrified.

“what are you thinking?” you ask in a whisper.

your blinks are getting slower and slower. rafe begins to run his hand through your hair, combing them back, and touching the skin of your neck and shoulders ever so softly.

thinking about how much i want to be with you and how fucking scared i am.

“nothin’. close your eyes.”

you do, not because he told you to, but because you couldn’t keep them open any longer. 

why do you feel the safest with someone as dangerous as rafe cameron? someone who deals with the shadiest people around, that has anger issues and violent behavior.

that tried to drown his own sister.

why none of that matters when you’re in his arms? are you actually insane?

probably.

(...)

as soon as you wake up, you see your bed empty, and rafe’s clothes are no longer on the floor, where he had left them last night. it was to be expected, but you still feel disappointed. he was so sweet last night.

when you look at the clock, it’s already past nine in the morning, which means you’ve slept, surprisingly, eight hours straight. damn, you really were sleep deprived.

the sound of your stomach begging for food makes you get out of bed.

when you leave your bedroom, you hear the sound of the tv on and get scared. slowly, without making any noise, you go down the stairs, trying to find out if your house has been invaded, but it would be strange, as it is daytime. soon you see rafe walking around your house.

he didn’t leave?

it’s like you’re not even there. you get to watch rafe make himself comfortable in your kitchen, looking for stuff to put on the table. there are two delivery bags on the counter, which means he bought food, but the gesture warms your heart, which was merely shattered.

“the cutlery is in the second drawer next to the sink.” you say, startling him a bit.

“jesus. can you, i don’t know, announce you’re in the room? i almost dropped your coffee.”

you laugh.

“sorry, rafey. what are you doing, i thought you had left.”

“uh, i bought breakfast for y- us.” he says. you look inside the bags and you can tell he ordered possibly everything you have eaten from that place. “c’mon, i ordered that vegan shit you like, your coffee and even a pretzel.”

you follow him to the table and you both begin helping yourselves. this isn’t your first time having breakfast with him, but it does feel like it’s a first.

for the first time, you don’t want to leave him.

i love feedback! let me know your thoughts! <3

[jmrothwell]

"hold my hand" "absolutely not" "they'll think somethings wrong if you don't" *grabs hand and kisses cheek* / sweet tarts

“Do you need a job?” 

Reggie startled ever so slightly, trying his best to hide it by sitting up from the lounging position he was in while reading his book. Once up he found an aggravated Carrie standing in the doorway of the studio. 

“Are you talking to me?” He asked, looking around knowing full well he was the only one here. Everyone else had gotten pulled into various family holiday events. Even Luke and his mom had managed to reach a sort of compromise for the season. 

“Is there anyone else here?” She said again before releasing a long exhale disguised as a groan, “Anyway, did you need a job or not?”

“A job” He couldn’t help repeating the question, one of his eyebrows rising against his better judgment. 

“Ok, so it’s barely a job.” She said weight shifting as she adjusted her feet with her eye roll. Her gaze shifted away from him, examining the room around them, eyes lingering on the many photos Flynn and Julie had plastered across the wall. “I really just need someone to come with me when I go to my mom’s for Christmas.”

“I’m sorry what?” He really didn’t mean to blurt out the question as fast as he did. Still blinking away the shock of the words he was hearing. Couldn’t recall her ever mentioning her mom before, or anyone for that matter. Though if he had to judge based on the way Carrie’s face scrunched up and how she shifted her feet again she wasn’t very comfortable with the topic. 

“My mom’s been trying to reconnect and make up for lost time.” She said, voice bordering on her peppy show tone. 

“I don’t know.”

“It would be just for a week and she lives incredibly close to some decent skiing. So you could think of it more like a little winter vacation if you’d like.” Carrie said, her voice never straying far from that peppy ‘sales pitch’ tone which did not ease any unease he had at the idea. 

“What’s the catch?”

“There’s no catch.” She quickly said, disbelief written all over her face in the short seconds before managing to school her expression again. “Look, me and my family are even paying for everything. All you have to do is show up.”

He chewed over the idea, also chewing the inside of his bottom lip not really buying this perfect vacation she was trying to sell him on. There definitely had to be something she wasn’t telling him. Why him? Why not any of her other friends? 

On the other hand, it would be nice to have something to keep him out of his parents house that wouldn’t also have all his friends playing their usual ‘let’s help Reggie without him knowing it’ tactics. It might take them all a while to believe Carrie had randomly offered him what basically amounted to an all expenses paid ski trip out of nowhere. But weirder things had happened. 

“All right, when’s this trip?” He asked, trying not to be floored by Carrie’s unexpectedly bright, if short lived, smile. 

“We leave tomorrow.” She said digging her phone out of her purse and settling on the couch so close to him she‘d barely need to move to be in his lap. “Quick, give me your number so I can send you the details.”

“Oh yeah, sure.” He said fumbling for his phone, caught a little off guard by both her sudden proximity and the amount of shit he suddenly had to do before tomorrow. 

He barely registered everything she said about texting her his address to coordinate with her driver. Far too focused on mentally making his packing list, hoping he had enough clean clothes. Didn’t even question her when she suddenly pulled him in for a series of selfies, the first half dozen inadequate because he didn’t look happy enough. He doubted he ever looked happy enough, certain she just gave up, and resorted to using whatever filter for whatever app she was sure to be posting it to.

The next day didn’t fare much better for his nerves. Pleasantly surprised when she did in fact show up at his place several hours before the sun would even dare to be up so they could get to the airport on time. Too tired to enjoy the fact he got to sit in the slightly roomier business class, falling asleep before the even finished taking off. It was a rare direct flight too, so he wouldn’t get another chance until the flight home. 

Just as they passed security and into the throng of all the friends and family waiting, Carrie’s hand gripped his bicep tight pulling his attention to her as they walked. 

“Ok so, before we get too far there is something you need to know.” She said in a sort of half whisper, trying to not be overheard but still trying to be heard over the noise all around them. “I may have lied about there not being a catch.”

His heart clenched, he knew it was too good to be true, but more than that he felt more than a little betrayed. Did she seriously wait til he couldn’t escape to tell him what basically amounted to his side of the deal? He didn’t get the chance to call her out though, as soon a woman Reggie could describe as overly sparkly was rushing toward them with a big smile. 

“Carrie?” The woman said, throwing her arms around Carrie who had never looked so tense before.

“Aunt Debbie.” Carrie said through a forced grin, “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“What nonsense.” Aunt Debbie said as she playfully slapped Carrie’s shoulder. “Of course we were going to pick you up, Richard’s keeping the car warm. Your mom would have come but she’s a little preoccupied.”

Aunt Debbie tried to do a little hand wave through the air, her vibrant nails looking more like talons than Reggie expected them to, clearly trying to dismiss or wave something away. The movement only seemed to make Carrie tense up more than she already was. Reggie didn’t get long to focus on that though as Aunt Debbie’s attention fell on him.

“Oh sorry, you must be..?”

“Oh, right, sorry. Aunt Debbie, this is Reggie.” Carrie said as Reggie extended his hand out to shake Debbie’s, all of the syllables he was going to use to greet her with however froze up in his throat as Carrie continued on. “My boyfriend I was telling you all about.”

“Ooooh well aren’t you handsome.” Debbie said, patting his, the sensation all he needed to know he wasn’t dreaming. “Well, we better hurry up before Rich gets too bored and does something foolish. Did you check anything?”

Debbie walked off after Carrie’s reassurances they only had carry-on’s. Reggie did not follow, forcing Carrie to double back for him, if she felt any guilt over the situation she had it hidden well under all the resigned exhaustion she wore.

“Your boyfriend?” 

“It’s only for the week.” 

“Carrie we’ve barely ever spoken to each other.” He said in lieu of saying how they could barely be called friends. 

“Please,” she said, surprising them both, though she recovered faster than he did. “Like I said it’s only for the week. We don’t even have to get all lovey-dovey with the pet names or overt PDA.”

“But why do they need to think I”m your boyfriend?”

Carrie quickly looked over her shoulder to where Aunt Debbie was impatiently looking like she was waiting patiently.  “I promise I’ll tell you later.”

He sighed, slowly resigning himself to the idea. His only other real options being telling everyone the truth and spending the next week uncomfortably awkward around strangers or trying to find some way to pay for a flight back home and leaving Carrie alone, by herself. “You owe me.”

She nodded as she painted on that winning showmanship smile of hers, “Of course, now hold my hand.”

“Absolutely not.” The words were out of his mouth faster than he intended, still too caught up in his own blindsided irritation. Her smile barely faltered, the slightest furrow of her brow.

“They’ll think somethings wrong if you don’t.”

He glanced toward Debbie who had definitely stopped trying to not look confused. He didn’t exactly trust his mouth at the moment, so he merely held out his hand towards Carrie. She grasped it in hers and pulled him down so she could quickly press a quick kiss to his cheek and whispering a quick “thank you” into his ear. 

He swallowed hard, an attempt to both unclog his throat of all the wrong words and to clear his head of the memory of her lips ghosting across the shell of his ear. This was going to be a more complicated week than if he had just stayed home.

[chaosandbubbles]

Watch Me Watching You // Jason Kolchek Oneshot

Jason Kolchek X Female Reader

A/N: Hi everyone! I'm moving all of my shit over to this lovely blog--you may have known me before as yellowroseskolchek before tumblr decided to take a shit on me. All of my works will now be posted here, and I am going through and reposting everything. Sorry if repeats are annoying, but it is what it is right now sadly :( Please DM me if you'd like to be on my taglist for my Jason works, and alternatively if you'd like me to not tag you anymore!

WARNINGS AND TAGS: NSFW, MINORS DNI 18+ ONLY, exhibitionism, Simp!Jason, Jason doesn't know how to talk to attractive women, Reader is a tease, assguy!Jason, pushy!reader, showoff!reader, opportunistic!reader, public masturbation, masturbating in front of someone else, sexual tension, cocky!Jason, Jason is a sweet talker, horny!Jason, horny!reader, strong!Jason, sex only protected by BC, GUYS I AM NOT KIDDING THIS IS FILTHY BEWARE, k I warned you though, y'all are a bunch of horny animals I swear--

Word Count: 2.9k

Jason Masterlist, Main Masterlist

YOU could always feel Jason’s eyes on you. Every single second of every single day.

From the very moment you stepped foot on base, his eyes were on you. As much as Jason liked to pretend that he was good at hiding his feelings, the boy couldn’t be more obvious about his blatant staring and gawking, as if he’d never seen a woman in uniform before. 

You were decently attractive—you knew that much—but you weren’t certain that it warranted this sort of attention. The man was normally so fucking confident, sure of himself, but the second that you entered the room? That all went to hell. He’d become a blubbering mess of nonsense, wincing at each nonsensical word that exited his mouth, before groaning and mumbling under his breath that he suddenly had something really important to do. 

There was one instance where you were working out with a couple of the other women in the weight room, and Jason walked in, his mouth falling open instantly when he eyed you in nothing but your very very short, ass-hanging out spandex, and a loose-fitting, flowy crop top. 

“Hey, Lieutenant,” Rachel had greeted, her mouth closed in a tight line as she attempted not to laugh. “You alright there? Or are you trying to catch flies?” 

Jason had shaken his head vigorously, his mouth closing shut, before his eyes downcast and he murmured, “It’s nothin’, I—I gotta go find Nick, I—fuck.” 

And promptly left the room, without so much as a second glance your way.

“You know that boy is like, pathetically into you, right?” Rachel pointed out and you scoffed, shaking your head as you made your way back over to your yoga mat for some squats. “And I know you’re not not into him either, Marine.”

“Yeah, well, if he’s so into me, then maybe he should man the fuck up and make a move,” you’d retorted, more than slightly disheartened that Jason couldn’t even seem to be in the same room as you for more than five seconds. 

You’d be lying if you said you weren’t flattered—Lieutenant Kolchek was quite the looker himself if you were being honest—but you’d be damned if you would be the one to make the first move. No, if he really were interested in you, he’d have to man up and prove it.

That didn’t mean that you couldn’t help…move things along, though.

You’d deduced impressively early on that Jason Kolchek was an ass guy. His eyes were constantly glued to your ass, and you made sure to walk out of a room with a little extra swing in your hips, directly within his line of sight. He also seemed to be a bit of a leg guy, and you always made sure to show off your calves whenever the opportunity presented itself. Working out on base? Short, tight spandex. Received an injury—even something as small as a scratch—to the leg? Roll up your pant legs until it healed. Extra hot day out in the sun? I’m just saying, spandex is magical.

All of these advances succeeded in keeping his eyes on you at all times, but that’s all that they did. Anytime Jason spoke to you, he was cordial, professional, and clipped. He rarely joked around with you, got to know you, or even scheduled you for the same night shifts. 

No, just showing off your assets in a public setting wouldn’t work. You needed to hit him where and when he was the weakest if you had even the slightest chance of getting any action from him. 

The moment that you realized this was the moment that your plan officially began to form. 

You weren’t an overtly clingy person; if Jason wasn’t interested in anything more than a sexually beneficial, no strings attached sort of relationship, then you could certainly provide that type of need. If Kolchek actually was interested in a real, boyfriend/girlfriend type of relationship? Well, you wouldn’t exactly be the most opposed to that idea, either. Whatever he was willing to give at this point, you were more than willing to take. 

You just needed to give him a little push—show him just exactly what he was really missing. 

It started on a Saturday, as good things often do; it was hot outside, and you had taken every opportunity to be out in the sun, running in a sports bra and spandex. You’d been put on Jason’s “team” today for training, along with a newer recruit, Joey Gomez, and a couple of other guys you knew casually. Jason seemed to avoid you at every turn, giving you instructions without making eye contact or using your first name, even though he’d clearly warmed up to the other Marines. 

You’d rolled your eyes at him a few times—and he must have been looking at you at least a little bit—because the snappy sound of your last name would snap your attention to him every single time, and he’d glare at you, shaking his head before moving onto the next task. You quietly smirked to yourself then, going on to do pushups or run the mile or whatever the fuck came next.

You decided to up the ante—just a little bit, because you didn’t want to scare the poor thing away. You started doing your workouts closer to Jason, occasionally rubbing up against him if you could, making sure that when you bent down or squatted, your ass was in full view of his face.

At first, he didn’t react, Jason only stiffening up or turning his head away from your advances. Eventually, though, you noticed that he began to stand closer to you, as if he, too, were testing the waters of just how far you were actually willing to go.

After a few brushes of your fingers up his arm when you passed, “accidentally” downward dogging your ass into his business, and ensuring that he be the one to spot you for weights, you began to notice how flustered he truly was. His face was red and his breath was coming out in anxious huffs, and suddenly, his eyes were catching yours every couple of seconds with a certain heat beneath them, his teeth capturing his lips as he stared you down.

The two of you played this game for the better part of five hours, until it was time to break for lunch and you sauntered off to the bathrooms, alone. 

Fuck.

 You hadn’t even managed to get him to say five words to you, yet his stare alone was enough to make you absolutely heated. 

You ran to the farthest stall—a communal bathroom, unfortunately, but you were banking on the fact that you’d chosen one so far away that nobody would come to it—and pushed yourself against the far wall, your hands pushing your spandex down and away so fast it was fucking impressive.

Your plan had obviously backfired on you; you’d intended to get Jason all hot and bothered, but instead, you’d ended up that way, and you desperately needed some form of release before you could go back out there and keep training because if you didn’t, you feared you wouldn’t be able to focus on anything but the sweltering heat in your pussy.

Your finger found your nub quickly—way too fucking quickly, but you were much too far past the point of embarrassment to really give a fuck right now. You whined as the back of your head smacked against the wall, your eyes shut tight and your mouth formed in a little ‘O’ as you began to work your little bundle of nerves quickly, hoping for a short and sweet orgasm anytime now.

You were building yourself up quite nicely, your free hand clutching the sink and your teeth gritted as you began to feel the budding energy of release upon you, when suddenly, you heard a noise from just outside the bathroom.

Fuck, you thought to yourself, quickly pulling your hand away from your wet core and snatching your spandex from off of the floor, using them to cover your front and dashing into the nearest stall, closing yourself in and silently praying to yourself that whoever it was hadn’t heard a fucking thing. 

You squinted as you peered through the thin lines of open space between the stall door and the stall walls, your eyes widening as you watched none other than Jason walk in, running a hand through his hair nervously before heading into a stall of his own.

He hadn’t seen you at all, the man completely oblivious to just how filthy this bathroom had gotten and all because of him. 

Your first, and most rational, thought was to pull your spandex on and get the fuck out of there—but suddenly, a lightbulb went off in your mind. It wasn’t every day—or ever, really—that you got Jason alone, yet here you both were. Alone, and halfway across base, where you were certain nobody else would dare to venture out to. Shit, you were pretty certain that the only reason Jason was out here was because he thought that you wouldn’t be.

You let your instincts—and the budding, pleading promise of release—take over, and you exited the stall, coming to camp out directly across from the one you saw Jason in. You weren’t sure what he was doing in there; if he’d come here with the same intentions as you, you certainly couldn’t hear a fucking thing, and if his intentions were purely innocent, well that just turned you on even fucking more.

You smirked to yourself as you hopped onto the bathroom counters, hearing the flush of a toilet and turning your eyes to the cracks in Jason’s stall.

He was looking back at you, eyes wide and visibly anxious.

You bit your lip in a play on seduction, letting your spandex fall to the ground as you “dropped” them, your entire lower half naked and on display for him, if he so chose to watch. Something about the fact that he could watch—that he would be right there, staring at you as you climaxed—made you throb even harder than you already were in the first place. 

Not one to get performance anxiety, you leaned your head back against the mirror with a moan, shutting your eyes tightly as you allowed your fingers to crawl their way back to your folds, rubbing in and out as you whined and thrashed. 

You began to get sweaty, and Jason still hadn’t moved a fucking muscle, but you couldn’t tell between the bars of the stall whether or not he was embarrassed or turned on, so you continued to fuck yourself. You were getting close, and the fact that you could practically feel his eyes on you was doing nothing but amping you up even higher, to the point that you climaxed quickly and easily, letting yourself let out a brief shout as you came quickly.

Once it was all said and done, your hand moving out of you and you straightening yourself up on the counter, Jason exited the stall. His face was red and he avoided your eyes, stalking over to the farthest sink from you and washing his hands quickly, careful not to acknowledge your presence at all.

You stared at him in the mirror, but his face was carefully crafted into a blank canvas, giving absolutely nothing away. You wondered, briefly, if you had fucked up—if you had gone way too far and made him uncomfortable. 

It was only a minute before Jason stepped away from the sink and dried his hands before he turned to you and your now-covered self, his eyes wandering down to where you held the thin fabric of your spandex over your nakedness.

You watched him gulp as his eyes wandered back up to your face, his tongue in his cheek as he stepped closer to you. Your breath hitched as he laid a few fingers on your thigh and they danced dangerously close to your womanhood, his mouth turning up into a smirk as he leaned his mouth to your ear.

“Fun show,” he taunted, and you squirmed under the teasing edge of his fingers, pushing themselves underneath the fabric of your spandex and whisking it away. “But I can do it better than that.” 

Your chest was roaring up into flames now and you pushed him slightly away from you so that you could see his face. Gone was the embarrassed, nervous man that you had known, and here in his place was a confident, dominating Jason that you had never seen before. 

It was hot as a fucking middle-of-July summer.

“Oh, yeah?” You answered, finally finding your fucking voice. You leaned back into him, your fingers grabbing the collar of his t-shirt and pulling him so tightly into you that your noses were touching.  “Then put your money where your mouth is and prove it, Kolchek.”

Jason apparently didn’t need any more prompting, because he grabbed the back of your head fiercely, his fingers intertwined in your hair as he shoved your face against his, his lips smashing into yours beautifully as he kissed the ever-living daylights out of you. He stood in between your open legs on the counter, and even with you propped up this high, he was taller than you. 

Your own hands wound around his neck and kept him close to you, ensuring that he wouldn’t change his mind and back away suddenly, leaving you dripping wet and alone. 

“Don’t know how long I’ve wanted you like this,” Jason mumbled against your lips, his hands pushing up under your shirt and discarding it as you attempted to do the same with his. When you were unsuccessful, you broke the kiss, planting your lips onto his neck instead and sucking, reveling in the way that Jason moaned underneath your touch. You finally got his t-shirt off and threw it across the room, uncaring of where it landed. “So fuckin’ long—”

“Yeah, I know the feeling,” you huffed out as Jason’s hands were now kneading your breasts, his lips locked onto your collarbone and sucking viciously. “Why do you think I masturbated in front of you?” 

You couldn’t see Jason’s smirk, but you could feel it on your skin as his lips made their way down your body, paying extra attention to your breasts, belly button, and hips before stopping just short of where you craved them the most. 

“Fuck,” Jason stated, pulling away from you and staring hungrily down at your glistening pussy. “As much as I’d like to eat you out, baby girl, all I can think about is how much I want to bend you and your sassy mouth over and fuck you until you can’t walk.”

You tilted his chin up with your finger, your eyes gleaming devilishly as he looked back up at you. Biting your lip, you leaned in closer to him, capturing his still-covered waist with your legs wound around, pressing your noses together and sucking on the lobe of his ear when you whispered, “You don’t have to be gentle with me, Kolchek; I don’t break easily.” 

That was, apparently, all he needed to hear because he pushed away from you instantly, undoing his belt as fast as he could and shoving his pants and underwear down his legs before he was on you again, pulling you off of the bathroom counter and hoisting you up, holding you so that you leaned against the wall at the perfect height for your waists to match up.

Jason wasted no time—and you didn’t want him to anyways—as he pumped into you at an angle, working hard to keep you up and fill you up at the same time. Your hands were both in his hair and your head was thrown back as you felt his thickness fill all of you, curving in just right to hit you where you most needed him. You couldn’t care less about the pathetic whining coming from your mouth, or the way that you shoved his head into your breasts, begging him to suck you off there too. Jason got the hint and began working your breasts as he pumped in and out of you, hitting a good stride with his mouth on your nipples, his dick inside of you, and his fingers working your clit. 

It was so much sensation at once that you were pretty certain at any given moment you were going to keel over and lose it, and you could already feel that this was going to be the most intense orgasm you may have ever experienced. Jason was stunningly silent as he worked into you, his brown eyes boring into yours as he watched your face make its pathetic movements each time he did something good.

It wasn’t long before the pressure of his fingers alongside the pressure of his member was just too much and you screamed out, bucking viciously as you both rode the waves of your orgasm. In the middle of it, you must have done something just right, because all of a sudden Jason was crying out with a groan too, pushing farther into you as you felt him dripping his load into you, grateful you had been on the pill since you turned eighteen.

When it was all said and done, you were both just a pair of sweaty, blissed-out bodies, holding each other weakly as neither one of you really seemed to want to let go. You rested your forehead on his shoulder and he kissed your cheek with a laugh that made you giggle along as well.

“So,” you blurted out, pulling away from him and caressing his cheek with your hand. He beamed up at you, the gleam in his eyes threatening to bowl you over. “Now that we fucked, do you think we could have a decent conversation one of these days?”

What? It was a valid question.

Jason taglist: @house-of-kolchek @kawaiiwitch224 @inactiveforidk @lorebite @yeslieutenant @kassiekolchek22 @pechvogel @buttermykolchek @emilykolchivans @e-jaegerenthusiast

forever taglist: @house-of-kolchek @lorebite @yeslieutenant @kassiekolchek22 @buttermykolchek @kawaiiwitch224 @ageofbajabule

[restlesshush]

People talk about how refridging Mary to make Dean want to kill Jack in the soulless Jack arc was a really shitty thing to do, and it was, but the thing is I don’t think that’s even quite what happened, writing-decision-wise. Refridging Mary is not only not necessary for the soulless Jack arc to work, it also actively makes it less effective as a storyline, specifically in ways that seem to clash with what was otherwise being set up. Which makes it look like they didn’t kill her to serve their plot, given they actively made their story worse by writing her out.

(Edit: I’m not going to speculate as to what was going on with Sam Smith because I don’t know, but approx 1400 words under the cut about what I think was happening writing-wise)

Anyway so this is all based on an initial theory from @autisticandroids (who also asked me to write this post, hi!) that the way Mary’s death was handled makes it look like the sort of character death that happens because of an actor having to be written out, rather than one the writers really wanted to do otherwise. And once you’re primed to be thinking about this, 14x18 especially does really come off as the show scrambling to try and make her death hit, which is sort of the opposite of what fridgings are for – they’re normally thought of as being a low-effort way to pack an emotional punch. But because we’ve kind of barely seen her all season (she’s in less than a third of episodes), and because this is Mary so if we’re going to kill her again it has to hit, they feel compelled to spend time giving us a couple of slightly on the nose flashbacks to try and make sure we care. It’s the sort of work you’d normally do before you kill a character, rather than slightly messily afterwards to try and make their death look worthwhile, which is really how it comes off here.

And the thing is, it’s not just that it’s kind of messy – it doesn’t actually help facilitate the soulless Jack arc at all really, instead it actively distracts from it. Obviously this is true in terms of screen time, because we have to take time away from Jack stuff for the flashbacks and for Mary’s funeral, but also in terms of the story’s focus. The interesting thread here is “someone we care about is ~dangerous now, what might we have to do to stop them??”, which is pretty decently well-trodden ground for spn, which you could easily have done just based on the snake and burning Nick alive on their own. And then in theory, this would all be made extra tragic by the fact that it was Jack saving them from Michael that even put him in that position, but we barely lean into this because we’re so focussed on Sam and especially Dean’s reactions to Mary’s death. Like, that thread does even still gets pulled on a little bit! You have Dumah's “he lost his capacity for good through an act of goodness” – and that’s what’s actually compelling here. But it’s barely touched on really, because if you’re going to kill Mary, that’s what you have to focus on, or at least that’s what the show seems to be convinced of. Nick even explicitly says it in 14x18 – “Buddy, you killed Mary Winchester. You cannot come back from that.” So we get hung up on an accidental death that could easily have just happened while Jack had his soul, instead of the actual implications of Jack’s soullessness beyond that.

Everything with Mary’s death also obviously makes Dean come off less sympathetically (and not in an interesting way), if he’s motivated by revenge, rather than genuine concern about what Jack might do. In part because of the revenge motive, he seems to take a genuine vicious satisfaction in tricking Jack into the box, for example, whereas if it was more a tragic last resort for how to deal with this very difficult situation, it would make for a much more nuanced and interesting situation, that would hit much harder.

And this isn’t the only way in which the restructuring of the arc to accommodate Mary’s death has implications re Dean’s character. It does look like they were setting Jack up as a Dean parallel here, which obviously if he’s killed Mary, it’s hard for him to be in the same way anymore. There’s a really good post somewhere which I’m annoyed I can’t find about how good leaders don’t ask their subordinates to do things they wouldn’t do themselves, and how Dean would do insane things and so thinks it’s reasonable ask his subordinates to do them too. The post explicitly cites Jack in the Box and iirc also Moriah (edit: it was this post and it cites Jack in the Box and Unity) as examples of this, and while it’s a really interesting piece of character analysis, it’s kind of striking when trying to think about writing decisions that 1) this stuff would be strengthened if Jack was still in the category of people Dean could see himself in, which because he’s killed Mary, he can’t be and 2) by drawing the parallels it draws, it also points out that “oh hey! The writers have chosen to put Jack in situations that Dean has also notably been in! What does this tell us?”

Moriah is probably the less strong of the two examples re just the situation, but the thing is that in addition to Dean effectively asking Jack to be prepared to die for the good of the world like he has before, the obvious thematic use of a mechanic like the Equalizer is “by killing this person you are killing yourself not only literally but also figuratively”. Like, something something supernatural and wasted potential goes without saying, but they did presumably come up with that object for a reason, y’know? But then Mary’s death and the revenge motive means that Moriah doesn't come anywhere near to playing like Dean killing himself on two levels even though like… what is the point of that gun otherwise? It almost feels like a fossil from a different story. And then the situation re the Ma’lak box is very similar. @autisticandroids pointed out to me separately a while ago that Jack is becoming Dean in ouroboros – “I am a winchester + eating michael + being destined for the box” – and also that were it not for the vengeance motive things would very much more come across as “oh my god dean’s putting himself in the box”, which y'know would be both hard-hitting and also the sort of thing spn loves to do.

And it’s also what they’ve been setting up! Like, you go from Dean having something dangerous inside him that means he might have to be locked up or killed, to Jack ending up in that position instead, specifically via him fixing Dean’s issue! It's even him specifically who directly argues for killing Dean to protect the world from Michael in 14x02! There’s a lot of groundwork there for them as parallels in s14 which Mary’s death undermines – the season is just structurally way tighter and more thematically resonant if you take it out. Getting rid of Mary’s death and the revenge motive for Dean (leaving a tension between concern about Jack vs concern about the world in its place) also meshes way better with the way they originally set up the stuff with Jack’s soul too, where it’s meant to be a sad thing for him, that he would no longer be himself etc. And like, that’s arguably partly because it’s Yockey handling it and he’s the only writer who cares about Jack, but it is still what was being set up. “Jack died –> the mechanism we used to bring him back allowed him to burn off his soul to be useful –> he’s dangerous as a result of this and oh god we have to do something about it” is way neater and more compelling as a trajectory if you don’t throw in “also he accidentally killed our mother and so Dean sort of wants him dead because of that too”. There’s a disconnect between the obvious route to take this story and then end result, and Mary’s death seems to be the thing lying behind it.

So yeah, Mary’s death was a bad writing decision not just because it’s not worth refridging her for the sake of the soulless Jack arc (which it definitely isn’t), but also specifically because it actively makes the soulless Jack arc worse. Obviously misogyny was frequently a driving force behind writing decisions on spn, but it doesn’t look like it was here in the way people seem to assume. It doesn’t look like they were killing a woman in order to serve our story – instead, the story has been actively derailed by them killing a woman. Which does really make it seem like that’s not why they wrote her out.

[dreamingofaizawa]

Good Kitty

Shouta Aizawa x Chubby! Kitty Hybrid! Fem! Reader

***18+ Fic***

If you are under the age of 18, leave. Thank you.

Warnings: Kitty hybrid reader, smut, fingering, unprotected sex, praise kink (?), reader has insecurities, Shouta is soft and lowkey feral?, chubby kink (sorta), reader has a heat for the first time, barely implied virginity loss, a touch of dacryphilia

Word Count: 2.4 k

Author’s Note: This is inspired by @cupcake-rogue ’s fic Not Allowed on the Bed. I got permission to use it as inspo so here we are! Tbh the orignal had me feeling all sorts of feelings because, as a very subby sub that loves to please, I definitely have a praise kink and I WILL CRY if I’m called a bad girl. HOWEVER, Katsuki being the rough-around-the-edges guy he is wanting reader regardless of size made me very happy and warm and fuzzy. 

The premise with this is pretty much the same, except I made reader a kitty hybrid...and of course I wrote for Shouta, love of my life he is. I’m such a fucking simp. I’m not the biggest fan of the ending, but this has been sitting in my WIPs for too damn long and it’s decent enough for me to feel ok posting it.

Also, for reference, reader has black fur regardless of hair color. Reader could be blonde, but still have black ears and tail. That’s just the way I’ve chosen to write this for some reason, don’t ask me why, I’m weird like that. 

I think this is the first time I’ve written for a hybrid, so cut me a little slack.

Anywho, enjoy~

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You can’t remember life outside the shelter. You’d grown up here, the caretakers said they’d found you on the street as a nearly newborn kitten and immediately scooped you up and brought you back here. That was a long time ago. Now you sit, waiting, your hopes for getting adopted diminishing with every passing day.

It’s unfortunate, but you still haven’t been adopted. It’s not that you’re bad, you always behave, you make sure you do. But you’ve overheard time and time again the people that gazed down at you and whispered about how you were too chunky, too big and too squishy for a kitty hybrid. And some even called you bad luck. The pitch black fur on your ears and tail warded off many.

Today was just the same as any other day. Wake up, get fed, wait in your room while potential owners pick and choose not you. Adults and children alike would take chunks out of their time to play with you, but they all left the shelter with another smaller cat. It was nearing bed time now, dinner just finished and the caretakers were about to start closing when the little bell on the front door jingled. Someone had just come in. You ignored it all the same.

Two pairs of footsteps began making their way past rooms, whoever it was that had entered smelled good, like coffee and tree bark. A smooth hum accompanied the caretaker’s voice, it made your ears twitch and tail sway gently. Still, you decided to just curl up in bed and try to sleep. The chance of him adopting you was slim, if it existed at all.

As you lay there your ears pick up their footsteps, the lazy set that dragged familiar, the nearly silent set less so. You listened as they came closer, never stopping as the man strode past each room and peered in the windows. You waited for them to pass right by your room, as they had been, but suddenly the footsteps halted. The caretaker spoke first.

“Y/n? You awake?” You let your eyes flutter open and sat up, tucking your legs under you and sitting up straight. They asked the man if he wanted to go in and see you, and he gave a simple nod. When he entered you finally looked up at him. The first thing you noticed were his eyes, tired and bloodshot with dark circles beneath them, a deep scar curved under his right eye. His long black hair fell around his shoulders, swaying lightly with every measured step he took toward you.

He stopped right in front of you, a large hand stretching out and you give it a small sniff before nudging your head into it, letting him pet your hair and scratch at the base of your ears. It felt nice to be getting attention like this. A small purr sounded in your chest, your tail gently swishing behind you.

“How long have you been here?” His voice is deep and calm, tired even, but it sounds so welcoming. It’s so soothing to your sensitive ears, like a warm blanket. You give a small hum before answering.

“A long time. I don’t remember anything outside this place.” At that he raised an eyebrow, turning to the caretaker with a questioning look.

“Most people look for...specific traits in the cat hybrids. Y/n here is well behaved, a perfect house kitty really,” you purred a bit at the praise, “But she’s a little larger than most. And her black fur wards off the more superstitious.” The man gives a curious hum before looking back down at you.

“Do you want to come home with me, kitty?” The question caught you a little off guard. Nobody really asked the hybrids if they wanted to go with them. You looked over to the caretaker, who nodded their head with a gentle smile, encouraging you to answer. All you could do was give a small nod, and soon you were in the car, on the way to your new home.

He’d told you to call him Shouta. He was nice, always quiet and never got mad. He never smiled, but you supposed that’s just the way he is. He gave you your own room, and always let you rub up on him when you wanted to, taking the opportunity to pet you. Occasionally you got the odd kiss on the forehead when you nuzzled into his neck. Those always made you purr. He never came seeking you out, which was good since there were times you really didn’t want to be touched. 

The longer you’re with him the closer you get, and you find yourself doing things you’d never thought to do before. Sometimes you found the floor more comfortable than the couch, and would kneel down and rub up on his leg, your tail wrapping around his ankle. There were times you’d see his fingers idly drumming on his lap, and you’d lay down and nibble on one with your little fang-like canines. He didn’t seem to mind that little oral fixation, and he always let you do whatever you wanted. All in all, life with Shouta is great.

But today you feel weird. You’d been cooped up in your room for the first hour or so of the weekend morning, not quite wanting to go out and make it known something was off. But it’s gotten abnormally hot, your face and chest especially warm, and between your legs as well. Your panties are beginning to feel damp, your thighs starting to feel humid and sticky. It’s a little uncomfortable. And your tummy is starting to boil, neediness beginning to cloud your mind. This never happened at the shelter.

Reluctantly, you step out of bed onto slightly wobbly legs and peek your head out of your door to see him sitting on the couch, a book in hand and a mug of coffee on the table. His hair is loose, his strong lean body relaxed as he read. The sight of him and his scent made the feeling worse, made your panties and thighs wetter, your chest beginning to heave with your panted breaths. 

“Sh-shouta…” Your voice came out shakier and quieter than you wanted it to, but he’d heard you regardless. He closed the book and peered over at your shaking form in the doorway.

“What is it kitty?” You nearly mewled at his voice, his heavenly smooth baritone sending a shiver down your spine through to the tip of your tail.

“Something’s wrong...I feel weird…” As you tell him about everything that’s happening to your body, he’s dragging his eyes over you, taking in every detail. Soon he’s on the phone with the doctor, you can’t quite comprehend his words, only catching snippets. ‘Help’ and ‘how long’, followed by agreeing hums. It was all jumbled after that, your mind refusing to focus as you leaned heavily on the doorframe, your quivering legs barely able to hold your body.

Shouta’s large hand came up and cupped your cheek, letting you nuzzle into his palm. When had he hung up the phone? He ordered you to sit on the bed, and you obliged, watching as he swept up his hair into a loose bun and strode over, tilting your chin to look up at him through half-lidded eyes. He’s so close, his scent overwhelming and making your brain fuzzy.

“You’re in heat, kitty.” Heat...where had you heard that before? Back at the shelter, maybe? It was all a distant, unfocused memory right now. Shouta leaned down and kissed you sweetly, lips melding with yours as you purred and mewled, your tail thrashing behind you. His hands tugged at your clothes until you were bare before him, every inch of you on display. 

“You’re such a pretty kitty, you know that? So beautiful. Lay down for me.” The praise made you purr, made a chill crawl up your spine and your tail flick wildly. You obeyed the command, laying flat in the middle of the bed and he slotted himself between your legs, plunging two fingers into your tight hole. He let out a groan, pumping and scicssoring his fingers to stretch you out. You were already a sloppy mess, loud squelches ringing through the room in between your loud, whiny mewls and panting. 

It felt so good, the heat in your belly burning and tightening until Shouta’s fingers curled up into a spot that made stars dance in your vision. The pressure in your belly snapped hard, your legs trembling as he kept fingering you through it. His fingers slowed when you whined about it being too much, too sensitive. But you still felt hot all over, now it was worse, you wanted something so bad but you didn’t know what.

He got up and undressed himself and you licked your lips at his naked body, scarred skin pulled taut over thick muscle. What stood between his legs had heat spreading like fire through your body. You’d never seen a naked man before. He was quick to return to you, slotting his hips between your thighs and guiding the thick head of his cock along your soaked folds. 

“Relax kitty. I’m gonna make you feel good.” You gave a small nod and then he was pushing his thick cock inside you, groaning at the way your pussy clamped down on him. Your tongue lolled out of your mouth as he slowly pushed and pumped his hips, cock dragging along your wet warm walls perfectly. Mewls slipped past your lips, high pitched whines and pants like music in Shouta’s ears. 

His hands wandered over your body, squishing and pulling at every piece of you he could get his calloused fingers on. It made you squirm beneath him, your own hands trying to push his away, but he wasn’t having any of it. He grabbed both your wrists and pinned them above your head in one strong hand, then went right back to groping your body with his free one.

“I can’t have you stopping me from touching you, kitty.” That’s all he said before focusing back on your body. He tugged at your belly, your sides, every place that was fatty and squishy. He’d never admit out loud how much he loved how soft you are. You’re perfect, plump and meaty, just more for him to touch, to look at, more to squeeze and pinch and pull.

He groaned out as you whined beneath him, tears beginning to clump in your lashes because he just kept squeezing, and he isn’t fucking you hard enough. Your orgasm built slowly with his languid pace, not nearly enough to get you to that peak and you were frustrated because you wanted relief but it wouldn’t come. Shouta picks up on your hips jerking and rolling, trying to get him to fucking move faster. He pulled his hips back and slammed back in, setting a brutal pace and making you whine high and long. 

Tears begin to fall from the sheer ecstasy of it, and he’s realizing how much he loves to see you cry from the pleasure he can give you. With a groan, he’s releasing your hands and wrapping his arms around your waist, burying his face into your breasts and biting and sucking at your skin as he pounds you into the mattress. He isn’t normally an impulsive man, wouldn’t let himself let go like this. But for you. For you he’d give in to his lust and ravage you like you need him to.

Your orgasm slams over your body like a tsunami, your muscles locking up and a loud yip ringing from your throat, pleasure making your whole body shake. Shouta let out a hiss, your nails digging into the muscles in his back furiously, but he wouldn’t stop for that. He never stuttered in his pace, just kept ramming his hips into yours, heavy balls slapping against your ass and lewd squelches coming from where your bodies are connected. 

You’re overstimulated, throat feeling raw and tears still falling down your heated cheeks as you thrash from another orgasm, this one just as powerful as the last and making your vision spot black. This time Shouta leans back, wrapping a hand around your throat and licking the salty trails away.

“Such a good little kitty for me, so good.” With a few more thrusts he’s spilling inside you, and you can feel the warmth spread in your belly as you lay there, boneless. He lays down on top of you, both of you sweaty and tired and he starts whispering sweet words into your twitching ears.

“So pretty. You’re so pretty, kitten.” 

“Such a good girl for me.”

“You’re all mine, kitty. So good, all for me.” Tears begin to spill from your eyes for a different reason. Up until now you’d lived your life believing nobody wanted you because there was something wrong with you. You never felt ugly, never really felt like there was something truly wrong with you, but you always felt...unwanted. Unloved. Unlovable. 

But Shouta makes you feel wanted, and loved, and pretty and all the things you always assumed you didn’t deserve. You’re his kitty now, and you’re such a good kitty for him too. He’s showering you with affection that you’d never known before and you’re shaking from all the overwhelming emotions. He can feel your body quivering, leans back to look at you and cups your face in his warm palm.

“What’s wrong, kitten? Why are you crying?” Your nose twitches as you sniffle, which he mildly notes is fucking adorable.

“Do you mean it? Am I a good kitty?” His eyebrows furrow and he rolls the both of you over so you’re on top of him. He’s peering into your big sad eyes as if reading your soul through them, trying to read the emotions you’re feeling, but it isn’t hard for him to figure out what’s racing through your mind. You nuzzle your nose into his neck and breathe in his scent, his hand coming up to pet your hair and ears.

“Of course, kitten. You’re such a good kitty.” The small reassurance makes you feel warm and happy, your tail flicking softly before curling around both your leg and Shouta’s, the end brushing his skin gently. You can’t help but want to stay with Shouta forever.

[harfanfare]

I saw this post and I was wondering if you write Malleus' too, is okay for you to make that?

How to win a heart of Malleus Draconia?

a/n: I started posting my writings here because I want to improve my English — so I technically wouldn't make this request. But! Someone on Wattpad (where I take requests) asked for the same thing, so I rolled up my sleeves and wrote this guide today in both languages. Enjoy~

1. Don't be afraid of him.

It is said that the first impression is the most important.

So when you first saw this guy walking through the corridor of Diasomnia, it was hard for you to get rid of that view from your head.

Illuminated both by the green magic flames set in the lobby, as well as by the moon, which eventually managed to break through the dark clouds and with a bright glow appear in the windows of the dormitory, he seemed... lonely and beautiful.

You shuddered as you took a step down the hallway and the dark-haired man turned to you. He measured you with his emerald eyes. And then you recognized him; all the conversations about the mysterious and fearsome Malleus Draconia flew through your head.

Everything told you to rush towards the hallway and run as far as possible, but a piece of you found it inappropriate. Or rather, no one would want to chase everyone away from themself... right?

When you realized you were looking at him for a while, you took a deep breath and nod slightly.

"Good evening, Draconia-san," you said quickly. After a while you added, "The moon is beautiful today, don't you think?”

 2. Smile a lot.

Today was a really wonderful day: the test was postponed, your favorite dish was given in the canteen, and for some reason, the last two lessons were canceled – your class had to make just a quick note about a topic and it took less than fifteen minutes.

"Something happened?" Malleus asked, seeing how almost in the jumps you walk past him. When you looked at him, he added, "You smile a lot.”

"I can stop smiling if you want," you made a sad face, but after a while, the corners of your mouth began to tremble uncontrollably and twisted up again. "Oops, I can’t. Today... it was such a good day... that I think I'm slowly using my life's happiness.”

"I didn't say that smiling is bad," he said. "You look so much better when you smile.”

"Oh," you sighed with apparent surprise. "Is it a compliment?"

"It’s rather a fact..?"

 3. From time to time visit him during club activities.

"Is this a class of the ‘Gargoyle research society club’?” with a deaf knock you opened the door. Malleus turned to you, making a break from browsing through the materials gathered in the library about the history of each of the gargoyles on the school grounds. And there were a lot of them.

"Yes," he replied briefly, getting up. "Do you need something, [Name]?"

"Not at all, my club don’t have a meeting today," you said, closing the door behind you.

You looked around: the room was as clean as ever, except for one desk, where were laid several huge volumes about statues in NRC.

“Are you here alone?” You said before you thought. You lowered your eyes to see Malleus nodding unconcerned slightly. You blinked several times trying to think of what else you could say. "This room... could be a secret base," that was the first thing that came to your mind. Malleus turned his head to one side, uncertain of your response.

“A secret base..? Why?”

"I have no idea," you admitted quickly. "But the very existence of a mysterious point is interesting, isn't it? Doing normal things, such as watching movies or just talking, seems more interesting in places like this,” After a moment of silence, you sighed. "You know what, this idea with the base is stupid”

"We can try," he replied with serious tone. You raised your eyes to see how he looked around the room. "But you'll just have to explain this idea to me in more detail. We can also tell Lilia, Silver and Sebek about it...” he smiled as if seeing your five together in his thoughts was a pleasure. "It will be surely... fun.”

 4. Get yourself a Tamagotchi.

"Look!" you spin a new key chain on your finger. You finally stopped and showed it to Malleus. "Now they are matching!”

A small electronic toy, in a dark green screen that, when it flashed, showed a virtual, pixelated animal. You were impressed with how good quality it was made, especially since you only gave the Shroud brothers a sketch of a toy that Malleus owned.

Your keychain was exactly the same, just a different color and with another pet.

Malleus pulled out his own device and put it on the table. He pressed one of the buttons and a small pet appeared on the keychain – a dragon.

"They can now be friends," you brought your toy closer to so-called Gao-Gao Dragon-kun.

"Do you think so?" He asked in a very surprised tone, but it sounded as if in a moment he were about to burst out with an inexplicably joyful and surprised laugh.

"Of course. Everyone needs a decent friend, no?”

 5. Gain the trust of Lilia, Silver and Sebek.

Lilia, one of Malleus' closest people. It is much more likely that you will meet him before Malleus. He will be very proud when he learns that Malleus has found a friend. If you become a taster of Lilia, in terms of his pastries, he will 100% like you, and at 20% you will leave the kitchen alive and well.

Silver, who has mastered the art of sleeping in any conditions. It's easy to get him into your plans, although with the craziest ones he will hesitate. Rather well-disposed towards everyone, he can cover for you when you are not in class— but he usually inadvertently falls asleep and both of you often have penal assignments after school.

Sebek, faithful to Malleus, if he doesn't like you, you won't have too many opportunities to stay by Malleus's side without a thunderous glances at you. He will recognize you if you will listen carefully to his monologues about his master and as a sign of your friendship, he will teach you by heart of all the titles and achievements of Malleus so far.

With this trio by your side, you can get a lot further than you might have imagined...

 6. Be a master in hide and seek.

You’d give your right arm that your breath was too loud.

You pressed your hands to your mouth as you crouched in the corner of the room.

From whose voices you already heard, you knew that Lilia had already found Sebek. This meant that you or Silver would still be helping cook dinner since Malleus didn’t come at the start of the game.

This may seem silly, but the ability to play classic games was one of the elements of the art of survival in Diasomnia.

It was thanks to games like ‘stone-paper-scissors’, hide and seek or tag that household chores fell on the shoulders of the losers. Lilia loved the idea, and there was always a proud smile on his lips when he saw his beloved children play together.

You heard the steps behind you and shivered.

Very slowly you turned around and looked up to see Malleus standing over you and wondering what you were doing, crouching in the darkest corner of the room.

Puns were also included in the survival pack.

Fearing that Lilia would hear your whisper, you put your finger on your mouth, asking him not to say a word. You put a begging eye into it – all but not cooking with Lilia. Not again.

Malleus nodded, recognizing the gravity of the situation, although he smiled.

Really, no one would want Malleus to be an enemy.

Or at least in such a situation.

 7. Do not hesitate to ask him for help with learning.

"In theory, you should focus on the space around you," Malleus pulled a wand in front of him. It flashed, and almost at the same time, a thin but incredibly strong protective barrier was created around him. “Weaker spells can be reflected. In turn, the stronger ones are better to block”

You nodded understandingly.

Defensive magic was not something easy to understand. Most depended on the person against whom the counter spell was being prepared. And there are countless people who walk on this Earth and want to start fights.

"Unique spells block or avoid physically," he continued. You nodded at every subsequent sentence, slowly feeling like all the lessons are eventually gaining transparency. “Using unique magic against unique magic, the stronger will win, both will lead to explosions or completely reduce.

He looked at you when you wrote down the last sentence in your notebook.

"I sincerely hope that you will only need this information in class," he said with a sigh. "If you need help, call me. I will come. I promise.”

 8. Sometimes be persuaded to wear extravagant clothes.

"Do you really think it suits me?" you turned around, looking at yourself from every possible angle in the mirror.

You were going to the theater in a few classes to see some era-related play that you've been discussing now in history lessons. Everyone, respecting the reputation, actions and achievements of theatre, dressed in their best clothes.

Malleus stood next to you.

He was already wearing a black and white outfit with green accessories. They all worked so well together and fitted him like a glove that you were sure that the whole outfit was made especially for him.

"Yes," he replied. "Everything you put on today suited you very well.”

Once again, with critical eyesight, you looked at the outfit, face and hair, before you quickly turned off the lights in the room and closed the door behind you.

Then you smiled at Malleus.

"We can go now," you said. You made your way through the portal to the main NRC building. "And... thank you for your help.

"My pleasure," he said. Under no circumstances was it just a polite formula. He really loved looking at you.

 9. Invite him to your birthday/party.

"Another break from school soon, huh?" — you muttered, leaning against the railing.

You took a deep breath and let the fresh, pleasant air refresh you.

"Are you going to home, [Name]?" Malleus asked. Green lights were still flying around him, so you guessed he’d just appeared here.

"I haven't decided yet," you sighed. "It would be nice to go home, but the break won't be very long... Ah, that's right!” you straightened up and turned to him. "How about spending another break together? As soon as I can, I will contact my family... although I cannot promise anything.”

Though he did not show it, Malleus' heart beat a little faster.

Spend free time? With someone? With someone he likes?

"Of course," he sounded less calm than he thought. He wasn’t often invited anywhere, even for the things he should have been on, so there was a lot of excitement growing in his body. "I don't see anything against it.”

 10. From "The Great Malleus Draconia-sama" to "Love".

"Ah, The Great Malleus-sama!" you sighed theatrically, taking from him a box of chocolates with a joyful smile. You could promise that because of this dark-haired boy here, you slowly become pampered. "Thank you for your generosity!”

Malleus frowned.

"The Great Malleus-sama"..?” he pondered, putting his fingers to his chin. "Did Sebek told you again to call me with this title?"

"No," you laughed softly at his reaction. "I did it out of curiosity. Maybe I could call you some cute nickname, hmm?" you smiled mischievously.

"For example?"

"By adding ‘-chan’ to your name?” you turned on your phone and typed something related to the nicknames. You started reading suggestions and struggled to hold back from laughing. ” ’Sunshine’, ‘star’, ‘flower’, ‘sweetheart’, ‘love’...

"I like the last one," he said, and the invisible force stung you to the ground.

"Would you like me to call you like that? Out of curiosity or out of love?" You laughed, but your cheeks were all red with blushes.

He smiled sincerely at your reaction.

"Hmm, I wonder..?"

[thebluesideofmyworld]

A Good Guy - A Solangelo One-Shot

Summary: Will might be a lot of things. And among those things, Will would dare to say that he’s a good guy. But when it came to Nico di Angelo, would he ever be good enough, though?

Word count: 3900 words || Rating: Teenage and Up Audiences || Read on AO3

Notes:

1. Based on the song "good guys" by LANY 2. My contribution for @after-everything-pjo-zine project. Check out other fics (each fic is accompanied by great fanart so you just HAVE to check it out) in the zine here.

***

Will might be a lot of things. And among those things, Will would dare to say that he’s a good guy. And he would proudly say that it’s because his family raised him to be one. His Mama made sure that he never forgot to say please, sorry and thank you, and his grandma taught him to respect people. Even though Apollo wasn’t around to be an ideal father as Will was growing up in Tennessee, his grandpa showed him how to be a Southern gentleman.

So yeah, he might come across as a young man who with a sassy attitude. But heck, Will knew that he was a good guy. And he’s proud of that.

But here’s the thing. Here’s a thing about being a good guy. Being a good guy might sound like it’s a good thing to do. But being a good guy also sometimes meant that you’re almost as invisible as a wallflower. Because even though you’re good, there were always be better guys. And one thing that Will learned about being a good guy? Good guys never win.

***

“It’s been almost two weeks, you know,” Will said as he kept his eyes at the monthly medical report that he (pretended) to be reading.

“Two weeks since what?” Kayla asked, but didn't bother to pretend that she's actually interested.

“Since Nico went for that quest, remember? Something about Persephone’s parrot or something?” Will said, still trying to keep his eyes at the notes. Because he knew that Kayla might still see the worry in Will’s eyes. (Sometimes it’s almost scary, how his siblings knew him too well).

“Oh? Really? Has it been two weeks yet?”

“Almost,” Will said, decided to leave the detail that it’s actually has been 11 days and since Nico had left the camp early in the morning and now it was almost dinner, it’s been almost twelve freaking days since Nico left the camp for that stupid quest.

“I mean, of course, it might be nothing but well, I thought it was supposed to be a short, simple quest?” Will continued. “Usually if it’s just this small quest, it never took him this long before. Usually it would just be like, three days, five, at the most, and like, a week if he took a detour to impulsively do something unnecessary, but never this long.”

Will lifted his head and turned to look at Kayla, who didn’t seem to share the same worry as Will. Her eyes were still fixed on the glossy pictures of the magazine that she was looking at. A non-committal hum coming from her was the only sign that she was (kind of) listening.

Will tried to focus on the lines of writing in front of him, but the letters were all jumbled and he couldn’t make himself try to read anything. His mind was too busy thinking about different reasons and scenarios of why Nico wasn’t back yet from the quest.

“Do you think I should ask Chiron about it? Probably he’s heard from Nico, y’know. Like, maybe something came up and I don’t know, maybe Chiron knew or maybe even Rachel got a vision or something, or-“

“Or you could have just contacted me, Solace. Pretty sure that it doesn't hurt to try IM me”

Will stood up and spun to face the direction where the voice was coming from. He did it so fast, he got dizzy because of it. It took him two seconds before his eyes could fully focus on Nico di Angelo, who was staring at him. His face looked nonchalant, but his eyes glinted with amusement.

“Uh, hey,” Will greeted, gripping the desk as he suddenly needed to get a hold of himself. “You’re back.”

Nico gave him a single nod, brushing away some strands of hair from covering his eyes. “Yep. I just got back.” He shrugged his shoulders before continuing. “Thought I’d drop by here before I report to Chiron.”

Will tightened his grip on the desk, trying his best to hold himself from closing the distance between him and Nico just to pull Nico into his arms.

“And uh… What brings you here?”

The emotional part of him wished that he was the reason why Nico came straight to the infirmary after the quest. But the rational part of him shushed him. That damned rational part of him told him that hey, it was him who wanted to see Nico, not the other way around.

Nico kept his eyes at Will and there was something in those dark eyes that Will couldn’t really put his fingers on.

“I thought you wanted me to have a check-up every time I got back from a quest?”

Of course.

Will tried to ease the dull pain in his heart by giving Nico a small smile. “Yeah. Of course. Need to make sure that you won’t fade into the shadows again, huh?” Will let out a nervous chuckle. “I mean, I am your doctor, and a doctor only wants the best for his patients.”

This time Nico stayed silent as he nodded. Will gestured to a nearby cot with his chin.

“Now, if you could just sit down over there, please?”

Still saying nothing, Nico strode to the cot and quickly sat there. Will took a deep breath, mentally telling himself to be professional, and let it out in a long exhale. He made his way to where Nico was waiting for him.

The check-up was a regular one. And there was nothing new about how touching Nico made stupid butterflies do some stupid dancing in his stomach. He ached to ask Nico questions about what happened in the quest and why it took so long. He wanted to know whether Nico ever thought of him while he was on the quest the way Will kept on thinking about him while he was away. He wanted to listen to Nico talk to him, with that slight accent that made his voice so melodious, almost like he was singing.

But it would only scare Nico away.

So he kept his eyes at the board where he jotted down the notes about Nico’s vitals.

“So, uhm… This quest was a bit longer than usual, huh?” Will asked, almost proud of himself that his voice sounded normal.

Nico hummed as he put his jacket back on. “Yeah, we had an unexpected encounter with some empousai. Luckily, David is unexpectedly good at fighting.”

At the mention of the name, Will lifted his head up. “David? You mean the new camper? That Athena kid?”

Nico nodded. “Yeah. For someone who never held a sword before, I have to say that I’m impressed.”

A strange, nauseating heat flared inside Will’s stomach. “Really?”

“Yup. In fact, I promised to give him an extra lesson in sword-fighting tomorrow.”

That strange heat swirled even more inside Will. He stretched his lips into a lame attempt to smile at Nico.

“Oh,” Will said. “Nice.”

“In one way, he strangely reminded me of Percy, you know? The way he held his sword.” And Nico continued talking for a while about that stupid new guy. Will listened, humming every now and then just to show Nico that he’s listening.

Half of his mind wished that the harpies would find that David kid to be a nice target for their dinner. The other half of his mind scowled at him for having that kind of evil wish.

“Okay. Everything looks good. Just make sure that you drink enough water,” Will said as he wrote the date and signed his name on the bottom part of the report.

“So I can go now?”

Will nodded. “Yeah, you’re free to go now,” he answered as he walked back to his desk to put the record in the folder.

“And you’re not even offering to walk me back to my Cabin like a good Southern gentleman?”

Will spun on his heel quickly. He stared at Nico with wide eyes, thinking that he might have been hallucinating.

“What?”

Nico snorted and slid down from the cot. “Never mind. I need to report to Chiron first anyway.”

Will blinked, and it took him a full two seconds before he had his voice again.

“Nico-“

But Nico was already one step away from the door. He stopped and looked at Will over his shoulder. The left tip of his lips curled up, just slightly, forming a ghost of a smile. He gave a two-finger salute to Will.

“I’ll see you around, Solace.”

Not waiting for Will to answer him, Nico stepped away. And just like that, he’s out of sight.

Will stared at the open door. There is this hollowness inside his heart that he couldn't explain. Like he just missed a chance.

He always thought that he’s a good guy. Or at least, he’s trying to.

But would he ever be good enough, though?

***

“What are you doing here?”

Lou Ellen’s voice startled Will.

“Me? Uh…” Will scrambled to pick up the book that he just dropped and showed it to Lou, like he was trying to prove something. “I was reading!”

Lou Ellen stared at him with a glint of amusement in her eyes as she gave Will the Look. The ‘don’t-give-me-bullshit’ Look.

“What, am I not allowed to read in peace?” Will said, a bit defensively.

“Hey, it’s cool dude,” Lou said. “In fact, it was nice to see you somewhere else aside from the infirmary,” she added.

Will relaxed a bit, going back to lean his back on the tree.

“I can see why you choose this spot. It’s much quieter than the infirmary on your busy days,” Lou said.

Will hummed.  His eyes flickered to the far left, to the clearing a few yards away, just for a split second before he opened his book.

“And the view from here is also… decent.”

Lou Ellen’s tone made Will quickly look up again at the daughter of Hecate. She’s now grinning at him, like she just figured something out.

“How long have you been spying on those two?” Lou asked, gesturing with her chin to two demigods in the clearing who seemed to just finished sparring.

Will gaped at her. He blinked and quickly shook his head. “What? No! I’ve told you, I was reading here!”

But Lou Ellen didn’t seem to care about Will’s reaction as she waved at the demigods in the clearing.

“Hey, Nico! David!”

Will’s eyes widened in horror this time as he turned his head around, only to see that Nico and the new Athena kid walked towards them.

“Lou!” he hissed in annoyance.

Lou Ellen just gave him a teasing smirk. “What?”

Will groaned and quickly stood up, his book abandoned on the grass as he unconsciously ran a hand over his wild locks.

“Hey,” Nico greeted. “What’s up?”

Nothing’s up aside from his heartbeat, Will would like to answer. But of course, he kept it to himself as he tried his best to school his face into a relaxed, nonchalant, I’m-just-chilling-here expression.

“Nothing much,” Lou Ellen shrugged her shoulders. “You two are sparring together here? Why? Is the arena too mainstream for you?”

The new Athena kid gave a half-smile as he brushed off some hair from covering his eyes. “It was my request, actually,” he said. “I just want to have a...” he waved his right in a vague circular motion, like trying to find the exact word to say. “A more… realistic view when fighting a monster?”

That didn’t really make sense to Will. But it seemed to be an acceptable reason for Lou Ellen as she nodded at him.

“And has Nico been a good teacher for you?” Lou Ellen asked.

Will didn’t miss the way Lou gave him a quick glance.

David’s half-smile turned into a full one. “He is!” He turned his head to Nico and smiled at him, like he was pleased at Nico. “Thanks for teaching me, Nico. You are very good at sword-fighting.”

Nico returned David’s smile with one of his small smiles. A smile that could have filled Will’s chest with warm air. But since he’s not at the receiving end of that smile, it turned Will’s chest into lead instead.

“Anytime. It was a pleasure.”

“You will teach me more, yes? And ah… We also need to talk more. About football.”

This was the first time for Will to really listen to David talking, and he couldn’t help but notice how David’s voice had quite an accent. Especially when he pronounced football, the way he stretched some syllables.

Nico’s face lit up. “Yeah! We should! I know that Cecil played football! Right?” His eyes darted from Will to Lou Ellen, like asking for confirmation.

“Cecil? He does. I can take you to talk to him. Come on,” Lou Ellen quickly pulled the sleeve of David’s shirt and led him away from the other two demigods.

Will watched the backs of Lou Ellen and David who were walking away from them. He could feel nervousness starting to creep in on him as their voices slowly faded away, as he realized that he’s now alone with Nico.

Not that he hated to be with Nico. It’s just… this wasn’t his plan. He wasn’t prepared. And Will hated it when things didn’t go as he planned. He hated it when he was unprepared.

“David played football,” Nico said just when David and Lou Ellen disappeared from their sight.

Will angled his neck to look at Nico. “And when you said football, did you mean soccer?”

“I mean football,” Nico answered, turning on his heels a little so now he was facing Will. “The real football.”

Will snorted and slid down to sit on the grass. “They’re the same,” he said, leaning his back on the tree.

Nico followed Will, sitting on the grass. “It will always be football for me,” he said. There was a melancholic tone lacing his voice. And it made Will wonder, maybe it’s something that Nico used to play. In the streets in Venice, when he was just a kid who had no idea that Greek gods and goddesses were real.

“We, David and I, we were talking about playing here. I mean, it would be great, you know? David said he played midfield. I’m usually,” Nico paused, but quickly continued. “I mean, I used to play as a striker. If we can connect well, that would be really cool.”

Will closed his eyes while his stomach churned with a strange, unpleasant feeling. So, not only was this David kid good in sword-fighting, he’s good in soccer too?

“Do you play too? I mean, you can be the goal keeper. I guess you would be great. I mean, you’re tall and it would be a great asset for a goalkeeper.”

Will huffed. Stuck between the goalposts while watching Nico and David scoring goals? Yeah. No, thank you.

“We’ll see about that,” Will said, still with his eyes closed.

For a while, none of them said anything. Will opened his eyes when he heard Nico sighed. He turned his head, watching Nico stand up. Nico brushed his pants, and gave Will a small smile.

“I’ll see you around, Solace.”

Will wondered why that smile looked a bit strained, but returned it anyway. “Yeah. I’ll see you around.”

He watched as Nico walked away.

Someone would be a good guy for Nico, he thought. And even though Will was a good guy, maybe he just wasn’t good enough. So of course, someone would be a good guy for Nico. Someone else. Not Will.

***

Will didn’t even know why he was here, standing awkwardly near the table where the food and drinks were.

Oh, yes. Because Cecil and Lou Ellen practically dragged him here, to this stupid Halloween party organized by the Aphrodite Cabin.

It’s not that Will disliked Halloween. And it wasn’t like he hated Halloween parties either. What he didn’t like, was seeing Nico talking with David at the other corner of the room. Just looking at the sight made a strange, nauseating fire flame inside of him.

“Pining over di Angelo again?” Lou Ellen nudged him on his shoulder.

“Yeah. How long are you going to act like this Will? Playing it cool while we all know how you wish you’re the one talking to di Angelo instead of David?” Cecil joined Lou Ellen in interrogating Will.

Will only rolled his eyes. “I don’t know what you guys are talking about,” he mumbled, and took another sip of Coke from his cup. He tried to watch the campers who were dancing in the middle of the floor. Some kids from the Hermes cabin somehow got a hold of speakers. And of course, with a little help from the Hephaestus kids, the party had a cool sound system that was now playing pop music.

Lou Ellen sighed. Will stole another glance at where Nico was standing. David was leaning a little to whisper something at Nico. The proximity between those two made it a little bit harder for Will to breathe. He wondered what it was that David was telling Nico. But then Nico turned his head to Will. And no matter how cliché it might sound, Will’s heart skipped a beat when their eyes met. Will quickly looked down to the floor.

Next to him, Lou Ellen clicked her tongue.

“You know what? I can’t take this anymore. It’s been MONTHS. This has got to end tonight,” she said. Ignoring Will’s protest, she grabbed Will’s wrist and pulled him along with her, walking towards Nico and David.

A few seconds later, Will was standing with a flustered face in front of Nico and David.

“Hey, Nico, David! You guys enjoying the party?”

David gave that half-smile again. “Ah, yes. The party is nice.” He angled his neck just a bit so now he was looking right at Will. The half-smile subtly transformed into a knowing smirk. “And you? You… You are the healer, yes? Will?”

Will forced himself to smile politely at David. “Yeah. That’s me.”

David gave a single nod. “Nico talked a lot about you. A lot of good things.”

Will blinked. His eyes darted to Nico, but the raven-haired boy looked away from him. Still, his cheeks were a dark shade of red.

“Is that Cecil over there? I think I want to talk to him,” David suddenly said as he pointed at Cecil with his chin. “Lou Ellen? Come with me?”

Lou Ellen grinned as she nodded and made a 90-degree turn on her heels. “Yeah, come on, David. Let's leave these two idiots.”

And just like that, they left Will again, standing awkwardly less than two feet away from Nico.

“Uh… I didn’t expect to see you here,” Will said.

Nico turned his head at Will, an eyebrow slightly raised up. “Oh? I thought you were the one saying that I need to work on my social skill.”

Will gave Nico a small smile. “Yeah. So. Good to see you here, then. I mean, for your social skills and all.”

Nico stared at Will. And there was just something behind those dark eyes. Something that Will couldn’t put into words. Something that made him unable to look away.

“Aren’t you going to ask me to dance, Solace?”

The question got Will off-guard. Of all the questions in the world, it’s probably the most unexpected one.

“Huh?”

Nico held his eyes at Will’s for another second, but then he looked away. “Never mind,” he said, half-mumbling. His cheeks blushed again into dark cherry color.

“But… do you want to, though?”

Nico’s head turned back to Will. “Want to do what?”

“Dance? Do you…want to?”

Nico bit his lower lip and he looked down for a second. When he looked up back at Will, his charcoal eyes were soft.

“Depends.”

“On what?”

“On who’s asking me to.”

Will’s heart started to jump around in his chest.

“What if it’s me asking you?”

The eyes that were staring back at him were now smiling.

“Then I guess, it depends on the song, then.”

Will’s heart was probably doing some crazy somersaults right now, but his lips curled up without him even thinking about it.

“Well, it’s my favorite song that they’re playing right now. I hope it suits you?” he asked, carefully offering his hand.

Nico’s smile was as soft as the look in his eyes. And the moment their fingertips touched, Will’s heart soared high and suddenly his chest was filled with warm, light air.

As Will led Nico to the floor, he thought about how long he has been wanting to do this, to hold Nico’s hand in his.

They swayed along with the music. Nico’s left hand felt perfect in his right hand. Will’s left hand rested on Nico’s hip and Will couldn’t care less about the other people dancing around them.

“Your dancing is better than your singing,” Nico said, a playful smile on his lips.

Will chuckled. “My grandma said a real Southern gentleman must know how to dance. And I remember my Mama dancing with me when I was a kid.”

“Your Mam raised you well, I have to say.”

Will hummed. “I’m a good mama’s boy, I can promise you that.”

“I can see that, Will. Everyone can see that.”

“See what?”

“That you’re a good guy.”

This time Will held his eyes at Nico. “I try to be,” he said. “But… Would I ever be good enough for you?”

Nico huffed. “And you said I was the dense one.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean…” Nico stopped, but his feet kept on moving. He sighed. “Gods, do I really have to spell it out to you?” He asked, sounding exasperated as he looked away from Will.

Hope bloomed inside of Will and he grinned and oh, how he wanted to shout and laugh. He took his hand off Nico’s hip so he could gently cup Nico’s cheek, guiding him to face him back.

“Do you mean you like me?” Will asked.

“Well, do you like me?”

Will chuckled and he could feel a stupid smile creeping in. “Why do you even have to ask?”

Nico shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. Because you’re nice to me but you’re also nice to everyone? Because you don’t seem to care even if I talk about someone else? Because you…” Nico stopped again and shook his head. “I don’t know. Maybe because I just…don’t know?”

Will squeezed Nico’s hand just a bit tighter. “I was just… I was just afraid that I’m not good enough for you.”

Nico rolled his eyes. But his lips twitched, like he tried to hold back a smile.

“You’re a good guy, Will. You’re a good guy to everyone. But sometimes I hope that you can be my good guy.”

It’s like a thousand birds were singing inside of Will now as he felt like he was floating in this bubble of happiness.

“Then I’ll be yours, Death Boy.”

Will wrapped his arms around Nico, and pulled him into his embrace.

“I’ll be your good guy, then. I’ll be your everything.”

Nico pulled himself a little away from Will. He looked up at Will and the light in his eyes was like the most beautiful star in a dark night.

“Everything?”

“Everything. Anything you need.”

***

Additional Author's Notes: Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it :). Reblogs, replies or any other feedbacks are much appreciated. Also please don't forget to check out the zine!!!

[bostonbashers]

Hear me out.. How do mercs behave around a person they have a huge crush on?! :D

AAAAAA this one is so cute, i’m in love!! 🤩❤️

-

Scout:

literally a fucking DORK around you. tries to impress you constantly with anything and everything he has, ranging from his skill set to his appearance to his personal belongings and much more.

always finds excuses to spend time with you and it can be the most asanine ones in existence. oh? you have free time tomorrow? let’s go take a run down the street. you miss your puppy that got lost when you were a kid? let’s go to the ends of the earth to find it.

made you borrow his jacket/shirt once because he accidentally spilled a drink all over your shirt. once he saw you in it, he nearly died and didn’t want it back. takes it back anyway due to his pride and though he seems outwardly okay with it, he secretly doesn’t wash the clothing for a long while.

his flirtatious behavior around other people goes down immensely. scout becomes strictly loyal to you once his crush grows stronger and can’t bear the thought of talking with someone else, even if you don’t like him back. it just doesn’t sit with him right.

Soldier:

soldier is much softer and kinder around you. he restrains himself from using any harsh words that could hurt your feelings and tries to slow down on your training.

shows you his pets!! one of his prized possessions that he won’t allow anyone else to touch, like ever. he trusts you to love and take care of them the same way he does.

everyone has to respect you. if they even give you a slight problem, he’ll get on their case about it and probably give them hell before they could even mutter out an apology. you deserve respect and he’s gonna make sure you get nothing less.

lots of supportive comments from him! even if it’s something small, he’ll grin at you proudly and yell out a, “good job, cupcake! you did great!” while giving you a strong pat in the back or an approving nod.

Pyro:

pyro is usually sweet and kind with a certain crowd and tries to do the best they can for others, but with their crush? it’s a whole different story. they’re absolutely head over heels for them.

like a lovesick puppy; they will follow you wherever they go with a skip in their step. like, i mean they’ll follow you everywhere. “no, pyro you can’t follow me to the bathroom-!” they don’t really listen but patiently wait outside anyway.

one of the many mercs who won’t hesitate to show affection and sees nothing wrong in it. runs up to them and holds their hand firmly with a happy hum, hugs them more than usual, and just straight up gives you all their attention.

Demoman:

oh boy, if tavish has a crush on you, he’ll show it when he’s absolutely wasted. demo will literally smother you with affection regardless of where you both are and literally latch onto you every second he gets a chance to.

lots of drunk ramblings; he’ll lay his head on your shoulder or lap while he mindlessly slurs about how amazing you are, what his favorite thing is about you, and so much more.

it’s pretty obvious at that point demo likes you so you admit your liking to him pretty quick and it’s funny how shocked he gets. “ya knew i liked ya?!” yes, demo, they did.

when he’s sober, he’s much more shy with it and controls his actions a lot more. apologizes for his behavior while drunk. tavish exhibits more gentleman behavior, from opening doors to making you a decent dinner and just basically ensuring your comfortability.

Heavy:

heavy is very mature and will accept his feelings pretty quick compared to the others. it’s a 50/50 chance with him; if they feel the same, that’s great! if they don’t, then.. he’d have no choice but to move on. that’s how life works.

once he does accept it, be expecting a lot of mother hen behavior; he literally watches your every move to make sure you’re safe and healthy. even if you are, he goes out of his way to give you things whenever he knows you’re around; a homemade meal, a blanket, probably some candy. your smile is already more than enough to make up for the little things he does for you. 

no one will ever dare to hurt you around heavy (or just in general, really). he senses danger and issues pretty quickly, so it’s easy for him to detect any bad intentions. he’s like that scary bodyguard who looms behind you, glaring at anyone who radiates rancid vibes to scare them away.

Medic:

probably takes a while to accept or realize it cause he’s always so preoccupied in his lab, being busy and all. but once he does realize it, it’s sort of foreign to him at first, so of course, he goes to heavy to speak about his emotions. after being told it was a crush, he pays attention to you a lot more than usual, sometimes even without him noticing.

he gets all giddy when you’re around and although it’s not the jumpy, squealing giddy, it’s certainly one shown through happy greetings and continuous conversations that seem to be never ending. (you don’t mind though)

makes up random appointments and checkups for the smallest things just to see you and gets very, very excited whenever you decide to come to visit him without his knowledge. nearly drops everything just to attend to you.

he talks to archimedes so much about you that his precious pet basically knows who you are based off his owners reactions and automatically flies to you whenever you enter his lab. that bird is a lot smarter than you think. they get along with you pretty well and medic melts whenever he sees you talk to his birds like he does and play with them.

Sniper:

bless his heart, the poor man will literally faint around his crush. just the sight of them flusters him to his core, and don’t even get me started on their little habits and that godforsaken smile. [hes literally almost died when they grinned at him]

he’s already so reserved and quiet as he is, but around them, it’s even worse. he’s always so scared he’s gonna scare them away or say something stupid, but he eventually lets go of the fear and tries to muster up the courage to talk to you.

once he does, he spends a lot of his time with you, often inviting you out to drive around with him or just simply sit outside and enjoy the breeze. he talks a lot more than usual and though he doesn’t completely open up about his past just yet, he does indirectly hint that he trusts you more than anyone in his life.

lots of sleepless nights when he realizes he’s in love. he does everything to take you off his mind but all fails in the end and he’s kept wide awake thinking about what you two could be. from then on, it becomes increasingly difficult to keep his cool around you and silently begs you’ll confess one day or he’ll lose it.

Engineer:

sweetheart mode: activated. like it’s not a big switch up, since he’s naturally a gentleman but it’s noticeable enough. you’ll notice that your nicknames will start slowly forming to more romantic ones and how he blushes with a smile everytime it leaves his lips.

the other mercs can tell when dell has a crush; he blushes a lot more than usual and they catch him smiling more than once by himself. they realize it when you approach him and he automatically fixes himself to look presentable without a second breath. his voice also changes to a much happier and giddy tone, it’s so cute!

stares at you from a distance a lot or whenever you’re distracted with something. half of the time he doesn’t even realize he’s doing so but once he catches himself, he blushes and looks away, silently telling himself to quit it. often you’ll catch him staring at you, but you ignore it for his sake and laugh to yourself when he smiles back and waves shyly.

Spy:

takes a long while before he actually accepts the crush, seeing that he’s a very secretive and reserved person but once he does, you best believe you’ll be spoiled and loved by this man. lots of gentleman behavior!! opening doors, buying you gifts, giving you his coat, and all that fancy stuff.

teases you a lot more than he should; he enjoys your reactions. he’ll lean in close enough where your fingers brush slightly, tilt your chin up when he talks to you and makes intense eye contact while doing so. whenever he gets too close or the moment gets too tense, he backs away with a smirk and pretends as if nothing happens.

he listens to you and anything you have on your mind. his door is literally open for you 24/7 and even if you come knocking at 3 am, he’ll let you in and listen to what you have to say. you think he’s not listening cause he’s very unresponsive but when you’re finished and about to leave, he gives really good advice and tells you quietly that he’s there for you in an indirect way. depending how close he is to you, he’ll let out an experience or two about him to put you at comfort and as thanks for confiding in him. he then walks you back to your room with a simple nod and goodnight.

[hockeywhy]

caught in the middle (1); m. barzal

SYNOPSIS: For the sake of your friend’s wedding with Tito, you and Mat agree to maintain the facade of still being the happy couple everyone sees you as. But the act comes with its consequences, one more taxing than the other. WARNINGS: language. WORD COUNT: 11.2k A/N: I am so excited for this because it contains some of the tropes I enjoy seeing in fics, and I was dying to also put out some new content as opposed to only reposting my old writing. I wish I wrote this when I was still decent at doing the thing, but I hope that this is still an enjoyable read that makes you look forward to the next part! Title is based off Alexander 23′s Caught in the Middle which is such a good song and I really recommend. Sections in italics represent flashbacks. 

PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4

“We’re getting married!” 

You gasped, bringing both hands to cover the lower half of your face as your jaw dropped at the announcement. It shouldn’t be so surprising – you would’ve bet even your most prized possession that this was bound to happen at some point eventually – but knowing this was actually now a sure thing sent a thrill through you. It didn’t take long for the shock to wear off and in place of it, your expression mirrored that of your best friend’s: the wide grin, the bright eyes and of course, the giggles of sheer excitement as soon as the news sunk in. Elise was glowing and next to her, Tito embodied the idea of what the world’s proudest man would look like. 

“Oh my god!” you gasped, and Elise burst into laughter, not hesitating to jump out of her seat at the same time you did so that the two of you could embrace. Among your squeals and giggles, you could faintly make out the sound of hands being clapped, then caught sight of Mat and Tito hugging. Over Elise’s shoulder and over Tito’s, you and Mat exchanged smiles and you couldn’t help the chuckle that left your mouth as soon as he winked at you. “Congratulations!” you said as soon as you broke apart, though the two of you still held hands. Immediately, your gaze fell down to her hand where a ring now rested, and you couldn’t help but wonder how you hadn’t taken notice of it earlier. “Just—when? How? Where? Who else knows?” 

“We don’t have a date or venue set yet, but we wanted you and Mat to be the first to know,” Elise informed you as soon as you took your seats again.

“We have a favour to ask from both of you,” Tito supplied. As soon as he said it, you felt Mat’s hand wrap around your own and the two of you exchanged a brief look during which he squeezed your hand gently, before diverting your attentions back to the soon-to-be newlyweds. 

Newlyweds. The immensity of the word sent a discrete shiver down your spine. 

“I can’t imagine asking this of anyone else: I want you to be my best man,” Tito directed at Mat.

“You shouldn’t even think of asking this of anyone else,” Mat responded immediately, and the two shook hands on it. You couldn’t help but think that if they weren’t as comfortable as they were now, they’d probably hug again, do their typical pats on the back or fist bump as they usually did, but Elise’s head now rested on Tito’s shoulder and Mat’s hand was so warm, so firm atop your own. 

“Be my maid of honour, please?” Elise asked. “I can’t think of anyone more suitable than you and Mat as best man and maid of honour. We’ll return the favour of course,” she added playfully. 

“I’ll hold you to that,” you warned without hesitating because after all, you had no reason to – and you knew Mat would agree with you. 

Although the two of you hadn’t touched on the subject yet, there was an unvoiced knowledge shared between you that eventually, this would also be you. Eventually, Mat would ask you and your heart would grow and your soul would warm, and you would say yes. Yes, yes, yes. 

As you all settled down to hear a replay of how Tito popped the question and Elise accepted the ring, Mat’s thumb began caressing the back of your hand. Though the gesture wasn’t a novelty, you couldn’t help but take notice of the way your heart fluttered each time he seemed to linger more on your ring finger. It wasn’t difficult to imagine a ring wrapped around it but neither of you were in a rush: you simply waited for the right time to take your relationship to a point in which it would become a forever thing, fully confident it wasn’t a question of ‘if’ but rather, ‘when’.

*

This was anything but the right time. 

You frown as you cast a glance down at the phone resting on your lap, eyes narrowing a little at the name which brought the display to life for the second time in the space of less than a minute. You click the side button twice, silencing the vibrations of it and from your side, your colleague leans in to whisper to you. 

“You can take it if it’s urgent. I’ll fill you in afterwards.”

“Thanks,” you whisper back. “I think it can wait until the meeting wraps up though.” 

Luke gives you a well, if you’re sure look as he leaned back in his chair and you flash him a grateful smile. 

Still, it is difficult for you to settle comfortably in your seat again and much to your chagrin, you find yourself crossing and uncrossing your legs as if the call had sent some sort of signal to your entire body kickstarting jitteriness you can honestly do without. Not long after you find some comfort and energy to draw yourself back to the present, your phone buzzes again – only once this time, indicating a message. 

I’m waiting for you in the lobby.

Fuck, you curse inwardly, locking the phone in frustration. As quietly as you can, you gather your notebook and work tablet then lean in towards Luke who met you halfway. “Have to run but let me know if I miss anything important.”

“At the current rate, I wouldn’t count much on it but will do anyway,” he states as quietly as he can and the two of you exchange sly, conspiratorial smiles before you excuse yourself quickly and very quietly while making a swift exit. 

Internally, a string of curses follow without a break in between, and you have to physically bite down on your lip out of sheer fear one might unconsciously slip out. If anyone would be in your shoes, though, they wouldn’t blame you for it. You are the type of person to stick closely to any plans and agreements made, so the fact that he just chose to turn up so unexpectedly doesn’t sit right with you. Not anymore, that is. Besides, you had both agreed to do this after your workday ended as opposed to midday and definitely not in this place. Now, you have to brace yourself for coping with a foul mood on top of whatever else the rest of the day would throw at you. 

“You’ve got a visitor,” Rachel announces quietly in a sing-song voice from behind the reception desk as you approach. She doesn’t bother masking the giddiness in her tone and you struggle to work up as genuine of a smile as you can when she nods her head towards the waiting area.

“Thanks, Rach.”

“Bet he must be so happy your redeployment to the Baltimore offices was cut short so quickly,” she coos. 

“Sure is. We’re still on for tonight?” you ask quickly in an attempt to drive attention away from the subject before she can try to lead into it too far for your own comfort at the moment. 

Rachel’s smile falters a little, her expression somewhat quizzical. “Don’t you want to postpone so you could spend some time with him? You only just got back yesterday, after all.” 

You swallow uncomfortably before shrugging. “We’ve got plenty of time to do that. So tonight, okay? I’ll catch you later.” 

“Your call. See you then, Y/N!”

You only had just a split second to brace yourself for what is ahead of you, so you draw in a breath then slowly exhale it as discreetly as you can while cutting your way across the lobby. Since agreeing to this meeting, you prepared yourself as best as you could, imagining every single scenario and devising the appropriate plan for it: from the way you presented yourself to what you said, you had a mental plan for everything including a few backups just in case. The only thing you hadn’t factored in, apparently, was how little was under your control and you hated that. Each step you take made you feel less and less prepared for what is ahead, and the thought rattles you. If you were swift enough on your feet, you could just about make a quick turn and dip into the hallway leading to the visitor restrooms. All you need is just a few more seconds. A little alone time for you to run over your lines in your head. 

Except—

Mat looks up at the same time you take a step sideways, ready to bolt towards temporary safety. His eyebrows rise a little as if surprised by the sight of you, but you refuse to appear outwardly deflated by the turn of events. Instead, you square your shoulders, tip your head back a little and arch an eyebrow. You can do this. You note he is dressed casually, and his hair is pushed back underneath a black cap. 

Unless there was a change in schedule, Thursdays were scrimmage days. 

Your jaw clenches ever so slightly as you recall that with so much ease. Then again, you basically built up a collection of information that was practically helpful or useful to exactly no one over the course of the past few years. It’ll probably take just as much or maybe more to replace that with something different, so you try cutting yourself some slack whenever you are willing to.

“I thought we agreed on five thirty,” you state coolly, pitching your voice at just the right tone to also express surprise.

Mat pushes up from the armchair, returning whatever magazine he’d picked up back on the nearby glass table. “Sorry, I tried calling earlier this morning to ask if we can reschedule but it went straight to voicemail.” 

Oh. You mentally curse yourself for not charging your phone as soon as you made it home from the airport the previous night or bothering to check the voicemail message you’d been notified of once it did begin charging earlier this morning at your desk.

“They rescheduled the viewing of the new arena for this evening, and I was in the area, so I thought I’ll drop by just in case,” Mat continues, throwing a cursory glance around the place though to you, it seemed more like a way of having a break from the eye contact. You don’t complain; you welcome that. 

You open your mouth, ready to berate his poor timing but even you could admit you carry some fault here too. Only a little. You bite down lightly on the tip of your tongue, before nodding towards the seats though you didn’t wait for Mat; you sit, deciding he could make up his own mind if he wanted to follow or not. 

“How was Baltimore?” he asks after a few moments of awkward silence while settling in the same armchair he previously occupied. 

“Mat,” you say, hoping it comes across as more of a warning than a plea. You can’t deal with small talk and a part of you thinks that’d make the entire deal even more difficult to go through with. He presses his lips together into a thin line and you take that as your sign to continue. “Elise told me she’d like us to be at the venue a day in advance of the rehearsal dinner if we can. I’ve already arranged my leave for that, so it’s not a problem for me. I’m planning on making my way there sometime tomorrow afternoon.” 

“We can go together then. I can pick you up after work.” 

“There’s no need—”

“Y/N.” The sharpness of his tone catches you off guard and you can swear Mat was equally surprised by that, though only for the briefest of moments. He slides forward a little in the seat almost as if he is more than ready to leave but Mat has  never been one to back down so easily and you doubt any of that changed during the course of the past three months or so. “You were the one who insisted we go through with this and I’m trying. I really am, but you’re not giving me anything to work with. So please. Let’s just put everything to the side, do what we need to do and then it’s done.” 

Done. Like it is a task, like it is something you needed to cross off a to-do list, scrunch it up then trash it.  

The finality of the word is so heavy that it feels as if it had managed to knock out all the air in your lungs. You and Mat were running headfirst towards a fork in the road, and deep down you knew that was truly it. If until now the two of you have been dancing around each other, playing pretend as if you were kids living in a world of fantasy, you know that eventually, you have to let light shine on the truth: whatever lay ahead, you and Mat could no longer walk the same paths. It is just a matter of admitting it not only to yourselves, but also to the people you were lying to. 

Lying for, you prefer. 

Defeated, you slump in your own seat a little, legs crossing and fingers tapping lightly against the back of your notebook. “Be at my place by two. I’ll have everything that I need ready the night before so we won’t need to wait around.” A pause, and then, “how’s Tito?” 

Mat lifts a shoulder in a casual shrug. “Excited. Nervous. It’s the only thing he talks about in the locker, outside of it, on ice and off ice. How’s Elise?” 

“Same deal with her. I never knew there were so many shades of blue before, but I’ve been proven wrong before.”

A pause follows that could easily be attributed to the group of people rushing into the building and allowing noise from the street outside to filter in while the doors were kept open, but you can tell there is more to it than that if you are to go by the shift in Mat’s expression. His expression changes and you find you can’t quite read into it or guess what could be going on through his head. You try not to focus much on the little voice inside your mind that was bothered by it but find it takes a considerable amount of effort to do so. Force of habit, you conclude. 

“You don’t say,” Mat finally responds. There is a hint of accusation in his tone. Or regret. Maybe both.

Your lips press together firmly, a light frown forming on your face but chose to let that slide. Not only is the lobby of your workplace the least suitable place to have an argument about the two of you, but you find that even those short moments of seeing Mat face to face months after you called it quits appears to take a toll on you. You feel tired, worn out and willing to be the first one to back down for once. 

It is cruel irony that a big red neon EXIT sign is visible from the corner of your eye.

You release a quiet, long sigh then stand up from the seat. “Well, I guess we’re done here? I do have another meeting to prepare for, so…” You trail off, already backing away a few steps.

Mat opens his mouth as if ready to say something else but promptly presses his lips together, deciding against it. He gives a swift nod of his head then stands up. It’s then you notice the two Styrofoam cups in front of him and the neon EXIT sign imprinted in your mind starts flashing temptingly at you. Mat is a step ahead. He holds out one of the cups towards you and you are ready to tell him off for it, but he cut in.

“Thought I wouldn’t drop by empty handed.” When you don’t make a move to accept it, his eyes briefly peek behind you. “Rachel’s all eyes this way, by the way,” he informs you and a brief glance over your shoulder confirms Mat hasn’t been lying.

As soon as you turn to look towards the reception desk, Rachel grins, waves quickly at you then turns back to her computer screen. Begrudgingly, you accept the cup of coffee and force a tight smile. 

“See you soon,” you say by way of greeting and didn’t wait to hear a response from Mat. 

It isn’t until you scan your pass to cross the security barriers and make a turn out of sight that you take a sip from the drink and almost immediately wish you didn’t. It’s your order to a T. The two of you even brought a coffee machine that would let you replicate it on days when you didn’t feel like leaving the comforts of your apartment, especially days when Mat didn’t need to get up early for practices or scrimmages or evening games. It stayed with Mat when you left and the memory left a bitter taste in your mouth, despite the gentle sweetness of the beverage. 

Without thinking twice, you throw the cup in the nearest trash can. 

*

As soon as your order is set on the table, you ignore the basket of fries and reach straight for your glass to take a long sip from the straw, letting out a content sigh as soon as you felt satiated enough.

“Long day,” you state in response to Rachel’s raised eyebrows but she seems to accept that by raising her own glass. You clink yours against hers, take a smaller sip then set it back down on the table. “What time do you think you’ll make it over to the hotel?” 

“Well, I was thinking of trying to get there by midday on the day of the rehearsal dinner but it’s starting to look more like late afternoon. I’m…” She trails off, and you can just about pick up on her hesitation and the way her gaze shifts over to the side momentarily as if avoiding something or considering whether to continue that. You move in your seat, peeling your back away from the plush backrest to lean in a little closer.

“You’re…” you trail off, voice peaking just a little into a question in an attempt to prompt her to continue.

Rachel takes a deep breath in, shoulders visibly drooping and when she looked back at you, she did so with a look that could only reflect…shame? Embarrassment? 

“Luke and I are sort of thinking of coming along together.” At the sight of your widened eyes, she quickly adds, “just as friends! We’re still working out through a few things and we’re taking it slow. As in, much, much slower than the first time around.”

“No way! That’s… Rach, that’s so good. I’m happy for you both, seriously.” 

You find that you truly believed that, though it wasn’t a surprise to you. You had introduced Rachel to Luke while she visited you in Baltimore and at the time, he worked with you there also. Initially, you didn’t think much of it - you simply invited her to come along to a few after work drinks and the two kicked it off easily that night. Very easily apparently, because as the night started coming to an end, Rachel prompted you to go ahead without her. Ready to say you weren’t going to leave her own her own, you shortly found out exactly why: you watched with plenty of amusement and fascination as she and Luke climbed into a taxi together and whizzed off to his place, undoubtedly. That was pretty much their start and continuation. Her visits to Baltimore were more frequent and though you were seeing her often enough, it definitely wasn’t as much as Luke saw of her. And you were fine with that. They fit almost perfectly and it only took a few more meetings for them to label themselves as a couple. 

Things began crumbling as soon as Luke had moved to the New York office just a few weeks before your own return. While he seemed fine with the idea of Rachel working in the same place, that wasn’t also her take on things.

“It’s weird,” she told you through the phone. “It just… It’s so weird. I’d be seeing him at my place or his and in the office? No thanks. That’s way too much for me, you know?” 

It made sense, of course, and though you rooted for them, you didn’t want to push her into something she wasn’t comfortable with. Yet, there was a tremble to her voice, a sort of uncertainty that made you think otherwise. It wasn’t that Rachel didn’t have any feelings for him - maybe she was simply shocked to see him walk through those glass doors one morning to pick up his brand new ID and claim what would soon become his permanent desk across from yours. 

“Thanks,” she tells you, pulling you back into the present. “But like I said, slow and easy does it. We’ve been talking more and that makes a huge difference.” 

“For sure. If communication isn’t the backbone of a relationship, I don’t know what is,” you agree and wasn’t that ironic? You’re hardly in the position of giving any relationship advice at all or saying what is good for one and what isn’t. Not anymore. Not when your own had fallen apart. 

Rachel grins. “You’d know. You and Mat have been together for… how long now?” 

You should’ve seen it coming a mile away. You swallow uncomfortably, take another sip of your drink and take a few fries just to buy yourself a little more time. “Maybe four years? Don’t really keep track of that anymore,” you said as casually as you could muster, lifting your shoulders in a shrug. 

“I think I’d stop doing that eventually too at the rate you two are going. Honestly, I would’ve bet anything you would’ve been the first to tie the knot. Actually, thinking about it,” she says, clicking her fingers in recollection, “Elise said the same thing to me the other day when we caught up on the phone. She went—“

You don’t really register her words. There is a low ringing in your ears and an uncomfortable draft sweeps in the locale as the entrance door somewhere behind you is being kept open, no doubt a large group making their way in; it sends shivers down your body, but really, you are pretty sure you can’t only attribute them to a brief gust of wind. After all, your sweater is keeping you sufficiently cosy and warm. In front of you, Rachel continues praising your relationship with Mat, talking about how anyone took a look at you both and would say, whatever they have going, I want it too and you are trying so, so hard to block out as much as you can of it. You can stop her, of course; distract her with whatever random topic and you know she’d go with it but your jaw is locked in place, teeth clenched uncomfortably. You blame that and the way your nails dig into the palms of your hands on the sting behind your eyes and the sudden heaviness weighting down on your chest. 

It isn’t so much the pain of your relationship ending that was rendering you in a state of daze, but the shame of what you and Mat agreed to do: pretend the two of you were still the happy couple Elise, Tito and everyone else thought of you as just to not spoil whatever luck they thought you’d be passing on to them by being their main witnesses. And then, once the event passes and they would return to New York from the honeymoon you and Mat would soon gift to them on their wedding day, you’d tell them the truth. Or part of it anyway. Definitely no mentions that the two of you were childish enough to play pretend; just a simple, clean break timed just perfectly with your request to be permanently redeployed elsewhere. Preferably, as far from New York City as possible so that you no longer have to walk the streets you once both did or yearn to once again visit that perfect pie place the two of you once dubbed your own.

“We’re not together anymore.”

The words stumble out of your mouth in a desperate now or never manner. Despite the anxiousness that came with the act, you find relief in it also. It feels freeing to be able to admit the truth to someone that isn’t only yourself though perhaps you should’ve thought of this more carefully: the idea of now needing to come fully clean to Rachel is somewhat daunting, mostly because of what she might say in response to the front you and Mat are trying to uphold. But for the first time in what feels like too long, you no longer feel like a fraud; like a person lying to everyone around them.

“Wait.” Rachel frowns, and it was obvious she doesn’t quite know what to do with that information or how to best process it. Her head tilts a little, palm idly rubbing against the side of her neck so you take the initiative to come across as unbothered by this as possible by leaning into the seat, legs crossing as you fiddled with the drink’s straw. “What? I’m confused. Didn’t Mat just drop by earlier? You two seemed okay. He was…fine when he came in. We didn’t talk much, sure, but he was all smiley and just…normal.” 

You laugh quietly and shortly. “It’s been a while now. Maybe two or three weeks before I left for Baltimore, I think. It’d be pretty worrying if he was still hung up about it. After all, we both agreed on it. And this,” you add, a little more disheartened and embarrassed. “This…thing we’re doing. We promised Tito and Elise we’ll be there for them on their big day and we will. But they had this… I guess, idea of us being an ideal couple. Whatever that is,” you continue more quietly and with a roll of your eyes. “He wanted to tell Tito, but I didn’t want to spoil Elise’s day, you know? So he agreed. Took some convincing because it feels so… Gosh, it sounds so stupid, doesn’t it? Pretending we’re still together just to spread some fake cheer around.” 

“Oh, honey…” Rachel whispers and you read the sympathy in her voice. Not that she makes it particularly difficult to take note of. “But… I thought everything was okay. Actually, way more than okay. Perfect, even. What…uh—“ She trailed off awkwardly, but you could easily fill in that gap.

What happened?

You bring the beverage to your mouth, this time drinking from the glass directly as opposed to using the straw. The mixer stings your throat this time around but the small ice cube you take into your mouth numbs it away pretty quickly. Slowly, you chew it to small pieces and speak only when you finish it.

“I thought long and hard about this the first few weeks after we called it quits,” you admit. “We always talked about what bothered us or if there was something on our mind, but at one point we just… We stopped wanting to compromise. When I was put forward for Baltimore, it was going to be a permanent thing. Mat was happy, sure, but I could tell he wasn’t being entirely honest with me, you know? When I called him out on it, he asked me well what about us? And I said we’d be fine. Baltimore isn’t a different continent. It’s not even a different timezone. He could come over when he had free time and if he didn’t, I’d always spend weekends in New York anyway. It’s Baltimore, Rach. Not fucking San Francisco or whatever. Eventually, he told me exactly what was on his mind: he couldn’t do long distance. Not even for a short period of time while I figured out if Baltimore is really what I wanted. Isn’t it a bit hypocritical, though?” You question, but it’s clear Rachel feels a bit awkward about giving her take on it right now, so you make it easier for her by responding to your own question. “I felt lonely too when he was on the road. I was worried he’d find someone different, someone much better while away. He never gave me a reason to doubt him, but a small part of me still thought what if. This happened right before he was on the road again, actually. We didn’t call, barely even texted those weeks and then when he returned, we decided it’d be best to break up. Didn’t take us a long discussion to get to that conclusion because at that point, it just… I don’t know. It felt like we didn’t have much to say to each other.”

Rachel presses her lips together, the frown still on her face and hesitantly, she asks, “who said it first?”

“I did,” you respond without hesitating. “He wanted a break while we work it all out but come on, Rach, a break? Look me in the eyes and tell me people really believe in breaks and they come back to each other as if nothing happened.” 

“I mean…” she trails off, pointing at herself by way of explanation. “Look at me and Luke, I guess.”

You shake your head. “Nope. Not the same thing, trust me. This was for the best, Rach. It’s much neater to call it quits. That way, neither of us will feel obliged to hold back if life puts something different ahead of us.” You pause for a moment, teeth biting into your lower lip. “They said they’ll always have me back there if I decide on it, so who knows. Once I wrap up the project their called me back for, I might just take them up on it. Not quite a promotion, but it’ll be a good sidestep and maybe a change of scenery is what I need.”

“And do you think it’s good? What the two of you are doing right now?” Rachel questions, not at all deterred by your weak attempt at trying to divert conversation to a more work related topic. “And I don’t mean it just for Elise and Tito’s wedding, but for you and Mat generally speaking. I mean… the two of you have been together for a pretty long time. Doesn’t it… Isn’t it odd?” 

“It’s not normal, that’s for sure,” you confirm. “But it’d be weirder for everyone if we were to tell them we’re no longer together given we’ve been asked to do what we need to do. Rach, promise me this stays between us, okay? Promise. I know how it sounds, I know how it’ll look but trust me on this, okay?” 

She fixes you with a sceptical stare, a look that holds yet more questions than certainty but eventually, she nods her head and relief washes over you at the gesture. “I’m sorry it happened, Y/N,” she offers, voice warm and sympathetic as she places a hand on the table palm up. “And I’m sorry you went through it alone.”

You smile softly and reach for it, returning the squeeze she gives you. There is comfort in the gesture, comfort in her words and you find yourself rooting for it, so grateful to have received it. “The worst part is over, but thank you, Rachel. “It means a lot.”

“Feel like carpooling with Luke and I?”

“I’m good,” you assure as you both relax back into your seats. “Elise wants us there the day before the rehearsal. I guess just to have some familiar faces around that aren’t just wedding planners, so Mat and I agreed to go together tomorrow. Promise I won’t lose my shit if our song plays on the radio,” you add jokingly and find yourself laughing along with Rachel. 

“What song’s that?” 

Too many, you think, although one in particular stands out to you. “Brett Young’s In Case You Didn’t Know.”

*

A tray containing an assortment of dishes is set on the table and shortly after, an ice cold pitch of sangria accompanies that. Eager to cool down, you reach for one of the empty glasses to pour yourself a drink but Mat’s quicker. He takes them both, filling your glass first before his own. You laugh to yourself and Mat grins at that, briefly looking towards you as he fills his glass. You’re about to take a sip, eager to both quench your thirst and cool down but Mat takes the initiative of initiating a toast by raising his glass a little, elbow resting on the table. 

“What’re we toasting for tonight?” You ask, imitating his pose by leaning forward a little. “To our first holiday together? To how perfect the weather’s been so far? To how I mastered paddle boarding way before you did?” 

Mat laughs, lowering his head as he did so but when he looked back up at you, he clinked his glass against yours and held it there. “To all of that. To one of the many, many holidays we’ll have together. To this moment right here, to us, to you.” He pauses and the strobe lights of the bar switch from dark blue to hot pink, and the way Mat stares at you in this moment makes your heart race inexplicably. “To how much I love you.” 

He takes your breath away. Draws it right out of your lungs and you feel heady. It’s the first summer with Mat, the first  I love you from him and it suddenly feels as if this bar is too small for the both of you. You love him, and he loves you too and the only thing you could imagine doing is jumping in his arms but there’s a table between you and sangria topped wine glasses in your hands, and he’s wearing a pristine white shirt that looks incredible against his tanned skinned and there’s a lot of people around (the majority significantly older than both your age and Mat’s combined) so you simply grin and carefully lean forward more, pressing a kiss to his mouth. 

“I love you,” you murmur against his lips and even if your voice is low compared to the loud, cheesy country music blasting through hidden stereos, you know Mat catches on to that. 

“I love you,” he says right back and before you pull away, he bumps his nose against yours gently, making you giggle.

You both take a sip of your drinks and you smack your lips together, content with the turn of the night. 

You and Mat had been dating for a few months, but this was the first time the two of you will spend back to back nights and days together without needing to rush somewhere. Of course, a part of you was anxious about it - while it was easy to spend a few hours together now and then, maybe even the odd night together, it was entirely different being together pretty much all the time. There were habits and quirks you each had that might get in the way, but your worries were soon put to rest. You and Mat had wonderful chemistry together, easily able to spend your time together but also still enjoy each other’s company while doing separate activities. You didn’t want to rush into things and you made no move to do so, but it was ever so easy to imagine what living with Mat would be like. And sure, you were well aware of the fact that it wouldn’t always be sunshine and rainbows; the two of you would eventually transition out of this honeymoon-type period of your relationship, but something told you life would Mat would never bore you. It’d never make you wish for anything different. 

“Give me a second,” Mat says and before you could ask him what he meant, he’s out of his seat and you follow him across the bar, a little confused. 

He makes his way past the bar, past the pool tables and stops in front of what is undoubtedly a jukebox. Curious, you arch an eyebrow and watch as he fiddles with finding the right amount of change before inserting the coins in the slot. It takes him a while before he finds whatever song it is he wants and it takes enough time for him to make it back to your table before the jukebox and sound system registers the request. You don’t recognise the first few notes at all, much less the accompanying guitar strings but you don’t have time to search your memory for a title. 

Mat stops by your side, holding a hand out to you. “Dance with me.” It’s more statement than question and under any circumstances, you may have felt a little awkward about doing this, but it’s the heat of the moment and your giddiness that pushes you to your feet, hand in Mat’s. 

The two of you are beaten to an emptier area in the establishment by two other much older couples that were closer to it anyway, and you find that gives you a bit more of a boost also. Mat pulls you to him, wrapping one arm around your waist while holding on to your free hand while you hold on to his shoulder with the other. Your fingers lightly clench and unclench the soft material of his shirt, lowering your head a little and you smile against the back of your hand. It’s so painfully cheesy and there’s nowhere near enough other people dancing along to the song but you love it much more than you thought you ever would. 

“Know what I’d invest all my money into?” He asks you suddenly.

You pull back a little, still swaying along with the song. “Cryptocurrency seems like a safe bet right now.” 

Mat laughs, that big hearty laugh of his that makes your smile wider and when it passes, he presses a chaste kiss on your forehead. “Well, I’m glad one of us has a good head on their shoulders, but no.” He shakes his head, then laughs again, shorter and quieter as if recalling your response. “A time machine. I want to stop time right here and right now so that we can be as we are for a little while longer.”

“Cheesy,” you joke, despite the warmth coursing across your entire body and the jelly-like feeling forming in your knees. “But perfectly understandable.”

“Eventually, we wouldn’t need it, but it’d be nice to have one for tonight.”

“Eventually? How so?” You question, then narrow your eyes a little, the gesture playful. “You plan on getting bored of me and breaking up?” 

“What!” He exclaims and pulls you in just that much closer. He lets go of your hand only so he could bring his to your chin, tipping your head back a little. “Never,” kiss, “say that,” kiss, “again.” The final kiss you share with him is a little longer and you take the liberty of bringing your hand to his chest, palm pressing against it to feel the thump of his heart against his ribcage momentarily. Then, slowly, you graze the tips of your nails along his exposed collarbone and peck his lips once more before pulling away. It’s then that the song’s name and artist comes to your mind, almost as an afterthought. From hidden speakers, Brett Young declares I couldn’t live life without you and Mat gives you a pointed stare. “Damn, he said it before I could.” 

“It’s the thought that counts,” you assure him. “Either way, I think I prefer hearing it from you, Barzal.” 

“I’m pretty sure I couldn’t live without you,” he recites and wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a hug. He sways you both in a more exaggerated manner that makes you cling to him more out of habit than necessity. You’ve known you’d trust Mat with anything, but each day, he seems to do something that makes that thought solidify more and more in your mind. The comfort and safety that brings wraps around you like a warm blanket.

Be it the hot weather, the somewhat stifling interior of the bar, the sips of sangria on an empty stomach, the euphoria of the moment or all things combined, you nod quickly. And from somewhere in the depths of your mind, the very bottom of your heart, you respond with, “I can get used to this day after day. So don’t let me go, baby.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he whispers, tone full of care and love and warmth. He gives you his promise without hesitation and you know it’s bound to stick.

*

Your phone buzzes once. 

I’m downstairs. Need help with your bags?

You push up from the comfort of your couch and make one last round of your apartment to make sure you had everything you definitely needed from where it was placed. 

I’m good. Will be down in a minute, you text back but don’t pocket your phone right away. Instead, you stare at the screen for a little while longer, half tempted to scroll through the thread of messages. They’d provide a stark timeline of when things started going wrong and you would probably be able to see exactly how things changed between the two of you from the moment you suggested a mere break wouldn’t do it. But doing that would be like breaking a streak you had going for sufficient time to earn a pat on your back. The journey of getting to a point where you were sufficiently okay with being in Mat’s presence without any other company was a long one and the last thing you needed was to recall how it once was. 

You and Mat started out as friends after Elise introduced the two of you just a short while before he started his professional career with the Islanders. She talked about how the two of them met in school and how great of a guy he was; real down to earth, funny and incredibly ambitious - traits she also assigned to you, and therefore thought the two of you would get along great. She wasn’t wrong about it. You knew a little about hockey, going to games every now and then mostly whenever Elise dragged you along but you found that Mat made the game more enjoyable. He explained it to you in a manner that didn’t make you feel belittled or as if it should be something you already knew of, and didn’t mind explaining some things more than once. On the other hand, you introduced him to your own hobbies and the little world you created for yourself in a city as big and busy as New York. You showed him the more lowkey but homely establishments, including your favourite pizza place that - unbeknown to you at the time - would become yours and his, and even took him to a few student bars where you regularly beat him at pool while he showed off at darts. Occasionally, it felt weird to watch him unwind in such…normal places and ways while on other days, he shone on ice and was easily one of the best rookies emerging from one of the country’s most well known sports leagues. Yet despite that, you found that athlete Mat wasn’t all that different from Mat the person.

He never put a front and his genuine manner was refreshing to you, particularly during a time when you were still a college student and a good portion of the guys around were textbook frat boys. Being around Mat was comfortable and safe. You didn’t feel the need to speak a certain way or be a different person, and retrospectively, the way you felt towards him developed almost organically. You felt yourself gravitating towards him and were pleasantly surprised by the moments when he’d seek you out first. A day off here and a day off there until eventually, you found yourself spending much of your free time with him and vice-versa. 

Falling in love with Mat was easy. Being without Mat was difficult. But, thankfully, not impossible apparently. 

Convinced you packed everything you needed, made your way out with a duffle bag on your shoulder and a suitcase at your heels. 

True to his word, Mat was parked in front of your place and as soon as you pushed open the building’s door, he looked up from his phone and made his way over to you. The last thing you needed was to make the journey any more awkward or difficult for the both of you, so you didn’t argue when he took the bags from you to stow them away in the trunk. 

“Are you going across the country?” You ask, peeking into the trunk while he plays Tetris with the bags. 

“What?” He questions, evidently distracted by the task at hand but straightens up when you delicately place a hand on his arm, pushing him to the side a little. 

“You’d think you’re going across the country for like, two or three weeks rather than a couple of days,” you repeat. “Maybe put that smaller bag sideways? That might let the bigger suitcase fit.” 

He follows your guidance and sure enough, that does the trick: the suitcases fit perfectly in the trunk and you grin to yourself, triumphant. 

Mat steps back, closing the trunk and brushes his hands together. “Thanks,” he says and you nod, heading towards your seat in the front. He follows you inside just as you click in your seatbelt. “I don’t think it’ll take us more than two or three hours to get there if traffic’s as good as it was when I checked it a little while earlier. Got everything?” 

“Everything important that is. Everything else, I’ll just worry about and pull my hair out when we get there,” you tell him and you can’t help feeling proud for being able to keep conversation light and as normal as you can. 

After all, you’ve known life before Mat and you’re rediscovering it after him too. 

Mat laughs ever so quiet, and from the corner of your eye, you catch him brushing his hand across his mouth though he’s a few seconds too slow in trying to mask his smile. 

“I think I’ll need to fill up soon, but let me know if there’s anywhere else you want to stop along the way,” he tells you while pulling out of the parking spot. 

You nod even if he probably might not see it and take the liberty to scroll through radio stations. Mat doesn’t seem to be against it, so you continue switching to them until, a little frustrating that nothing seems to work for you, you connect your phone to the car and play one of your playlists. A mix of upbeat pop and an assortment of viral tracks fill in the silence for a while, and the act of singing along in your head takes your mind away from how it almost feels as if you’re sitting on needles. It takes a conscious effort on your behalf to remind yourself to loosen your shoulders and stop fiddling too much with your hands, and you’re glad Mat seems to be plenty preoccupied with driving. Once upon a time, he would’ve immediately picked up on even the most mild of your discomforts and tried to do anything he could to alleviate them. You don’t know how much, if at all, Mat changed during the time you spent apart but you want to think that you no longer wear your heart on your sleeve as much and your emotions are much more guarded, especially in his presence. 

Apparently, though, there’s only so much he can take with silence filled in by music because once he’s off busier streets, he leans in his seat more comfortably and you can tell he very briefly turns his head towards you. “Think they’ll like their wedding gift?” 

You direct your gaze away from the flashing scenery outside to Mat. “Absolutely. Who wouldn’t like it? Trust me when I say Bali’s been a place Elise always wanted to visit and I can’t think of a better time than now,” you assure him.

“If they don’t, it’s on you,” he says and it takes you a beat longer to realise he’s just joking so you huff out a laugh, relaxing back in the seat. 

“If they don’t, they can give one of the tickets to me and I’ll happily go there.” You cast a glare out at the scenery ahead, eyes narrowing upwards towards the overcast sky. “I don’t think summer will ever come at this rate. I’m starting to hate it here.”

“Doubt Baltimore was any better,” Mat points out.

“Hardly,” you sigh. “Maybe I’ll ask them to send me to Miami instead. That’d be much better.” 

Mat clears his throat quickly, shifting a little. “So, are you planning on going back to Baltimore or... Why are you back?” You catch sight of the frown forming on his face, and he quickly shakes his head as if trying to rid the hint of accusation from his voice. “That sounded wrong, sorry. But just genuinely curious. I thought a permanent move was on the table?”

“It was. Still is, but they needed me back here to wrap up a project. It was a pretty bad move on their behalf to send me there before we had that wrapped up nice and neat, bow and all, but I guess…” You trail off, shrugging a shoulder. “Guess we’ll see what’s next after that. They do want me back there, though. It just depends how long it takes for things here to fall into place.” 

“Fair enough.” Another pause, another moment for him to press his lips together in silent deliberation. He did that often, and you wonder if that remains a habit still. “Was it a promotion? I forgot, sorry.” 

“All good,” you assure, brushing off the apology. “Not a promotion per se, but a sidestep with just a slightly bigger paycheck. The office there is a bit smaller than the New York one so maybe there’s a higher chance of getting promoted sooner, but I don’t want to jump the gun on that yet. How did things work out for you guys this season?” 

The Islanders had a good season, making the playoffs but fell just short of making the semi-finals, you knew that. After all, you hadn’t removed the Islanders game and news alerts from your phone and you put that on your laziness. You wouldn’t shy away from admitting to him you still followed the team’s progression, but you preferred not to. 

“Could’ve been better but there’s lots to learn from it,” Mat tells you and there’s a trace of excitement and determination in his voice. “Next season will be even better, I guarantee.” 

It’s a staple Mat response, one he always gave if he felt a game didn’t end in their favour or he didn’t do as much as he thought he should have. Sometimes, it took him some time to accept it. Usually, it came to him after pushing himself in training, after going that extra step in the gym, after re-watching highlights or coach videos and always - always, you’d assure him that it takes a team to move forward, not a single person. Always, he’d kiss you and tell you he loves you and always, you’d spend those moments wrapped up in each other’s arms, more often than not with Mat’s head resting against your chest and your leg slung around his hip. 

“Plenty of time to lift that cup, Barzal,” you assure him. “Sure, the sooner the better but there’s always a right time for everything.”

“I hope so,” he agrees pensively, and lingers on that thought. 

You let him to it, directing your attention back to the view outside and only now and then picking up your phone either to switch songs or browse through a few applications. A part of you feels almost obliged to try and push for conversation but you avoid doing so. The last thing you need is to make it painfully awkward for the two of you and you figure Mat could always do that himself if he feels like it. So, you let your mind wander to better things - to the upcoming rehearsal and the wedding itself, to how good Elise will look and how Tito will be so proud to watch her walk the aisle towards him. You imagine their reaction to the gift you and Mat contributed towards and smiled to yourself, knowing it was a perfect pick for them both. 

You don’t think about telling Elise you and Mat had lied to them. You don’t think about passing this hurdle - the final one before you two will become strangers to one another. You don’t think about how the next time you might both see each other again, you’ll both have such different lives that for a brief moment, the surprise of it will knock the air out of your lungs before you remember: that’s him without me, and this is me without him. And you won’t be the first or the last people to break up, but a part of you is certain what the two of you had was unique and could’ve been grand. So much grander.

You become more alert to your surroundings when he starts slowing the car and you notice you’re pulling up into a gas station. As much as space allows you, you stretch out a little and Mat stops right by one of the pumps.

“Want something for the road?” You ask him, unplugging your phone and taking your card from your bag. 

“Hold on, I’ll come with you,” Mat tells you and it doesn’t take long for the refill to happen before you both walk into the station’s store, beelining for the snack aisles even if you have only two hours or so until you reach your destination. 

“Oh gosh, those are going to be a nightmare to clean up if you spill any in the car,” you groan quietly as he browses through the variety of Nerds flavours. 

“But they’re so good though,” he shoots back and flashes a smile that is nothing short of sly when he picks up two boxes instead of one. 

“Yeah, until the flavour runs out literally two seconds after you put them in your mouth. I mean, enjoy that but I’m different,” you boast and pick up a bag of sour candy. 

“You just like obliterating your taste buds.” 

He’s not wrong. Sour candy and spicy foods are your guilty pleasures, and have been for the longest time. You don’t try to look into how easily he recalls that because, you tell yourself, there’s nothing to look into. It’s a mere fact that anyone who knows you would easily recite. 

“You’re wrong and you know it, but admitting that is difficult so it’s fine, Barzal. No hard feelings,” you throw back, snickering as you head over to the fridges for a bottle of cold water. Instinctively, you grab another for him and instinctively, he takes your candy and the water to pay for them but you still tag along with him in the queue. 

“No shot. I like some spice but to the point where I literally can’t taste anything else? Hey, remember that one time when you made something… Can’t remember what it was but it was so…” He purses his lips and you laugh because yes, yes you remember it so clearly. 

“So good you ended up crying over it?” You offer. 

“More like, I wasn’t crying but it was so fucking spicy, Y/N, holy.” 

“You survived though, didn’t you?”

“I only did because there isn’t a thing you do I don’t like,” he says and then, seems to catch himself but a second too late. “Didn’t like,” he corrects quietly but the damage is done. 

You swallow uncomfortably, directing your gaze away from him but don’t hesitate to nod towards the outside. “I’ll head over to the car. I’ll text Elise to tell her we’re close.” 

“Y/N—“ 

But you’re already taking steps towards the exit and out of ear shot, making a beeline for the car. Your heart thumps rapidly and uncomfortable in your chest and find that pressing a palm to your left side doesn’t make it any better. You know it’s an innocent mistake and there are some habits that die hard, but the way he phrased it triggered your fight or flight instinct instantaneously and despite yourself, you leaned towards the latter. You enter the car and take the time to compose yourself as much as you could. The last thing you need is to have a conversation with Mat about this because you didn’t want to have it - it shouldn’t happen for the sake of avoiding making the situation even more uncomfortable. It was an innocent slip up, no doubt, and you should’ve braced yourself to speak of Mat in present tense as opposed to past tense in the presence of others but it comes to you harder than imagined. 

It’s odd how you both once knew so much about each other, everything even, and now the two of you are reduced to dancing around all that and making conscious efforts to keep your conversations as short and banal as possible. 

You try and busy yourself with formulating a message to Ellie, one that’s long enough to try and make you seem as busy as possible by the time Mat returns to the car, but every line you wrote, every mini paragraph going into dull details about the trip and where you guys currently are seemed like an overthrow. So, you delete that also and simply text her an OTW just as Mat sets the sweets on the centre console and the bottles in the cup holders. 

He doesn’t start the engine immediately and your mood quickly switches to frustration. Sure, you hadn’t handled it in the best way possible but trying to have a conversation about it wouldn’t make it any better. Or at least, it’s just something you didn’t want to have to think about for the remainder of the journey. 

But he does just that, because that is what Mat always did: he talked with you.

“I’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable,” he begins, “I didn’t mean for it to come out the way it did. It’s force of habit more than anything else.”

“It’s whatever, Mat, so just move past it. I did, simple as that,” you tell him neutrally. 

There’s something in that response he must have not liked because you pick up on his small huff and shortly after, the car starts and you’re both on the road again. This time, with silence between you and an atmosphere so heavy it makes you wish you weren’t speeding down an Interstate just so you could open the window and let some of the air in.

-

The hotel the wedding will be held at lies in front of you, sprawling and secluded and perfect for an event like this. Tito is already at the entrance and when he spots Mat’s car, he waves quickly while Mat quickly flashes the headlights before pulling into an available parking spot.

“There they are!” Tito says by way of greeting and you walk right into his outstretched arms, hugging him. “Can’t believe so much time passed since we last saw each other. What is it, two months? Three?” 

“Three,” you confirm once you pull away so that Mat could hug him also. “It’s good to see you too. Where’s Elise?” 

“She wanted to check on some small details and said she’ll meet up with you guys in a bit. So here I am, the welcoming committee,” Tito explained and when he and Mat stepped apart, he reached out to give you another short hug which you accepted. “So how was Baltimore? Don’t suppose you liked it all that much if you’re back so soon. This guy was happy about it,” Tito adds, nodding his head towards Mat who was already busy emptying the trunk. 

You press your lips together, displaying a small smile. “Baltimore wasn’t too bad but they missed me here, apparently. Can’t complete a damn thing without my two cents so here I am for now.”

Tito frowns, but the expression is very brief. “For now? We’ll need to talk more about that later so Barzy doesn’t mope around as much as he did back then.”

You throw a quick glance towards Mat but he’s looking away towards whatever interesting spot on the ground he found, pointedly ignoring you. “I’ll have a word with him about it later,” you tell Tito lightly and together, the three of you make your way inside, towards the reception. 

“I think Elise is in the room at the end of the corridor if you want to say hi,” Tito informs you and you jump at the opportunity. 

You follow the corridor, making a right turn and continuing along the dimly lit hallway leading to what the signs informed you to be Conference Room 1. The door is slightly ajar and you begin picking up on the buzz of activity coming from within and soon enough, you’re face to face with a spacey room boasting an array of flowers and various arrangements tastefully decorating tables and drooping down from the ceiling. No doubt, the effect will be lovely during the night when colourful neon lights can be turned on. You spot Elise easily: she’s in the midst of the room with what is undoubtedly the scrapbook of ideas she’d been carefully putting together since Tito asked her to marry him. Outwardly, she’s all smiles and laughter but you can imagine the amount of effort and planning putting all of this together and working with planners takes. 

When she spots you, she squeals in excitement, sets her book down and dashes across the room to engulf you in a hug, making you stumble a few steps back. 

You burst into laughter and wrap your arms around her, squeezing her with just enough force to try and communicate how much you missed her but not so that it was uncomfortable. 

“I missed you! You’re here!” She exclaims, stepping back to look at you in disbelief then hugging you again. “Oh my gosh, I’m so happy you’re here! Where’s Mat? Is he here too?”

“Of course he is,” you assure her with a laugh. “I missed you too.” You throw a curious glance towards the room over her shoulder, nodding your head towards it. “How’s it going? Need me to take over for a bit?” 

“Maybe later. Definitely later. Come on.” She wraps an arm around yours and leads the way out of the room, undoubtedly back to the reception area where you left Mat and Tito. “Please tell me Baltimore is off the table. FaceTime is fine, sure, but it’s not great, you know? I need the real deal next to me. Besides, I’m not sure if you heard, but Mat wasn’t Mat without you.”

“So I heard, but forget about us!” You said in a desperate attempt to try and steer attention away from the subject. “Tell me about how everything’s going. Are you still nervous about it? Because trust me, Elise - you have absolutely nothing to be nervous of. What I’ve heard of so far and what I’ve seen will make it the absolute best day, surely.”

“Of course I’m nervous,” she tells you and to demonstrate, she holds her free hand in front of you and sure enough, there’s just a slight tremble to it. “Please lend me some of those nerves of steel of yours, Y/N, I’d do anything to have even a small percentage of them right now.”

“Pft, as if. Those are all show, trust me.” 

“I’ll take even that. Oh, Mat!” She greets as soon as the two of you reach the reception area and Elise spots Mat.

Much like you and Tito, they hug and when she steps back, she immediately stands next to Tito who doesn’t hesitate to wrap an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close. They exchange a quick kiss and you smile at the happiness and bliss they’re clearly surrounded by. 

It’s the slight pressure on your lower back that makes you jolt a little on the spot and it’s then you realise Mat had gently placed his hand there to encourage you a little closer. It takes effort on your behalf to follow his guidance but you move towards him, though you wish you could physically wince at how undoubtedly stiff the two of you must look. Or hopefully, not greatly so because neither Tito nor Elise comment on it or shoot you any funny looks as the four of you engage in brief conversation, mainly surrounding the trip here and any other guests they expect to receive today. 

You don’t hang around much, though. Elise’s phone begins buzzing incessantly and she’s whisked away by the message received, but not before she fixes you with a pointed stare and demands the two of you have drinks later in the evening. Tito follows her also, even if he informs you and Mat that he feels as if he’s running around in the right places only because of Elise and the wedding planners, but you encourage him on by joking he could maybe turn a few candles on the tables this way or that for some extra oomph. 

“I can’t imagine how she does it,” you admit to Mat once the elevator doors slide shut soundlessly and the car begins moving upwards to your floor.

“Pretty sure it’s not that big of a deal to her, given what all this is leading to,” Mat tells you and you detect a hint of detachment in his voice. 

You don’t welcome it, of course you don’t, but you choose to not point that out to him. The last thing you want is an argument to break out the relatively okay mood the two of you have managed to hold, recent events that could be erased from memory aside. Instead, you simply stand back quietly, eyes glued on the red digital numbers aside until they come to a halt on the ninth floor where the elevator stops and you’re both left in a silent, dimly lit hallway. 

Mat has the key to the apartment Elise told you the two of you would be in and just before tapping in, he hands you your own copy of it. Up until this very moment, you hadn’t thought very much of the overnight arrangements. You were pretty sure you meant to ask Elise a bit more about them at some point but both your attention and hers were pulled in different directions and here you were, stepping into your place for the next couple of nights, Mat trailing a little behind you. 

You stop, arms folding across your chest and you feel Mat stop somewhere close behind you, looking into one room.

“I didn’t think this through,” you state neutrally. 

Ahead of you lay only one bed. 

[aellynera]

Word of  Mouth (Santiago Garcia x Reader)

WORD OF MOUTH

(This has been sitting in my WIPs for-ev-errrrr and I finally got in the mood to finish it, since I haven’t written Santi in a while and I missed him. It’s nothing too involved, just a slice-of-life kind of deal, but I do like the way it turned out. Comments, likes, and reblogs always appreciated!)

I think this one came out as GN!Reader (I’ve read over it a few times but if I’m wrong please let me know.)

Word Count: 2340

Summary: It’s not that Santiago is mad about it, exactly; it’s more that he doesn’t like the way it happened.

Warnings: Some cursing. Some angst. Some fluff. Argument. Two people being stubborn. As always possible lack of proofreading.

Santiago comes off duty and returns to your on-base housing, and he stays quiet for far too long. Usually he greets you with a kiss, or at least a hello, but this time he doesn’t do anything. He doesn’t say a word as he goes into the bedroom, peels off his fatigues, and changes into a plain black t-shirt and plain khaki cargo pants.

He doesn’t say a single word.

“Um, hello to you too,” you call out, getting up to follow him. “How was your day?”

He just shrugs and shakes his head slightly. You get the same response when you ask him if anything interesting happened today, how training went, or if he’s hungry.

You haven’t seen him for most of the day, different assignments and different meetings keeping you apart while on duty, but you just know. From his silence and the way he’s acting, you just know. You’ve been trying to find the right way to bring it up, the right time to mention it, and clearly, that time is going to be now whether you like it or not.

He’s found out.

Even when different assignments keep you apart, you do work on the same base and everyone knows you’re together, even if you never officially said anything. It’s really no one’s business but it’s not really a secret, and you live together, so people just assume. And anything work-related was never unknown for long. Word has gotten back to Santiago, and from the looks of it, it has also gotten to him.

The fact that you can’t actually read his expression is what concerns you the most.

You sit down on the side of the bed and sigh again. “Frankie told you.”

Someone who had been in that early morning meeting with you, a particular someone Santiago identified as a best friend, certainty couldn’t keep it to himself. You make a mental note to have a very, very strict conversation with one Francisco “Catfish” Morales the next time you see him.

Santiago considers calling Frankie, so he can repeat exactly what he told Santiago this afternoon, after you’d already gone back home for the day. Instead he finally decides to answer you, his voice flat and dangerous.

“Are you out of your mind?”

“It’s my job,” you reply evenly.

“It’s your job if you get assigned to it,” he runs a hand over the back of his neck. “It’s not your job if you volunteer for it. That’s a choice.”

You furrow your brow at him. “Semantics.”

“Selection,” he responds, voice clipped.

You rest your head on your fingertips, four on your forehead and thumb on your cheekbone. “I’m the best person for this mission. and.. it’s not like it’s never come up before. We’ve had this conversation, Santi, we’ve talked about this exact scenario, and you even said that no one was more…”

Santiago raises an eyebrow. “Hypothetical and actual are not the same thing.”

“So, hypothetically, I’m not actually qualified to do this?”

“Actually, you should let someone else be the flag-waver this time.”

“The flag-waver?”

“What, now this hypothetically has nothing to do with being a goddamn hero?”

Your head snaps up and your eyes narrow at him. He glares in return.

“Actually,” you start, but Santiago’s short, humorless laugh cuts you off.

This time, your words drag through the tension like dull razors through styrofoam. “Actually,” you repeat, “this has zero to do with being a fucking hero and everything to do with the fact that no one else could get this done the right way and it is my goddamn duty to do what I signed up for.”

“There is no right way that this isn’t going to be an absolute shitshow.” The venom in his voice is like ice in your veins.

“Thank you for having so much faith in me and my abilities, Santiago.”

Silence falls on the room for a few long minutes as you both fight to check your emotions. You understand he’s angry - and maybe scared, although he’ll never admit it - and he knows you’re absolutely right on all accounts - although he is not ready to admit it.

You break the silence, voice tuned down and level. “Look, I wanted to tell you myself, but I didn’t see you all day. I didn’t want you to find out like this. Frankie shouldn’t have gotten involved. But I am going on this mission. I...I don’t want you to be mad about it.”

He looks at you for a moment, and this time you can read his expression, but it almost makes it worse. It’s a combination of worry, sadness, understanding, and yes, traces of anger. It’s not a look that suits him. 

You shift in your spot on the edge of the mattress.

“I’m not mad. I’m disappointed,” he says softly, then turns and walks from the room.

Oh. Shit.

***

The rest of the evening passes in a thick, uncomfortable silence. It’s been hours since your confrontation in the bedroom, and the fullness of night has fallen without a single other word being spoken between you.

You spend the night in bed alone, and Santiago makes himself mostly uncomfortable on the couch.

Morning breaks and you pull yourself from the confines of the comforter. Not that you had been sleeping very well anyway. It was warm under the covers, temperature wise, but it somehow felt so cold, and you haven't slept well. Your mind refused to calm down.

You shower and dress, going through your morning routine almost on autopilot. As you wash your face and glance into the mirror, one side of your mouth pulls up into a sad smirk as you recall Santiago’s last words from the night before.

Not mad, disappointed.

Your parents used to say that, when you’d done something against the rules, potentially stupid, and possibly morally questionable. It always seemed to hurt more than actually having them be mad at you, and you wince as you realize adulthood has done nothing to change that feeling.

You and Santiago have your fair share of arguments. Usually they’re not serious, even kind of playful. You both like to talk and you both like to be right, so a little verbal battle isn’t uncommon. But you’re still running the previous night’s...it wasn’t a conversation, but was it really a fight? Was it even an argument? No category really seems to fit, and this one just feels different.

You go downstairs and expect to find Santi on the couch, it’s still early, but as soon as you hit the bottom of the steps, the smell of freshly brewed coffee assaults your nose. 

He hands you a mug full of the dark brown liquid as you enter the kitchen. You take it with a nod of thanks and he nods back. But he still doesn’t say a word.

It’s a good sign though. At least, you hope it is, anyway.

You sip from your mug as he turns back to the stove, pushing some stuff around in a frying pan. It smells like bacon and potatoes and your stomach grumbles in protest, and you’re not sure but you think you can see the corners of Santi’s mouth turn up just a little.

Also a good sign. Maybe.

You sit down at your usual spot at the table and play with the handle on the mug. You offer him a singular glance and then stare back into your drink. Clearly he’s not going to be the one to talk first. You sigh.

This is not the first time he’s done this. Santiago is a good man, the best you know, and he’s honorable and decent and so fucking kind, but if there’s one thing you’ve learned since living with him, it’s he’s damn stubborn and can be a petulant brat when he wants to. And in typical macho hero Santiago Garcia style, he will not be the first one to cave after an argument, especially when he thinks he’s right.

You’ll give him shit for it later, when all the animosity has worn off, but for now, you’re going to have to cut the tension. You’ve never been good with silence and it’s only been one night and now this brief bit of morning and it’s starting to get to you.

And okay, maybe you’re not always the best at communicating with him, either. So you’ll be the first to break, this time.

You sigh again. “Santi…”

He turns his head slightly, away from his work at the stove, and glances at you. An eyebrow goes up.

“Are we going to talk about this? For real?” you ask.

He shrugs and turns back to the contents of the pan.

A frustrated growl erupts from your chest as you push your chair back and take the three steps over to the stove. You grab the handle and push the pan off the heat, snapping the burner off as you do, and then whirl and stare at Santi. He narrows his eyes and takes a step back, crossing his arms and leaning against the counter by the sink.

“Please say something to me,” you bite out. God, he’s so frustrating sometimes. “I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you about it first, but you cannot be upset with me for doing my goddamn job. For doing what I signed up to do. Just...fucking talk to me. Please.”

This time it’s Santi who sighs, and he runs a hand through his hair and massages a spot on the back of his neck. “I told you, I’m not mad.”

“Okay,” you nod, “but you really also can’t be disappointed.”

“I’m not.”

“You can’t just be...wait, what?”

“I said,” he says, uncrossing his arms slowly and reaching for one of your hands, “I’m not.”

You just blink at him and bite your bottom lip.

“I just...I don’t like the thought of you being out there without me.” Your mouth opens to retort but he holds up a hand to stop you, and you close it again and he continues. “I know you can do this, I know you’re totally capable and you can handle yourself, you could probably kick my ass on any given day in sparring, but...I just…” his voice trails off and he turns to stare out the kitchen window.

You squeeze his hand firmly and pull his attention back to you. He looks so handsome, his hair still tousled slightly from sleep and his t-shirt wrinkled from being on the couch all night, but he also really does look troubled and it makes your heart drop. “What is it, Santi?”

“There’s always a danger with any mission,” he says softly. “And it just kills me that I can’t protect you. I just want to protect you and have you come back safe.”

Then he’s pulling you into his arms and burying his face in your neck, and you feel wet spots on your collarbone and it makes tears prick at your eyes too. Santi shakes slightly in your arms and you whisper soft, soothing words into his hair.

He’ll never admit it, but you know. He’s scared.

Because he’s not wrong. This mission has the potential to go sideways and tits-up at the same time, and then flip over backwards for good measure. And you have to admit, although you’re not going to admit it to him because that would likely make it so much worse, that you’d give anything to have him on this mission with you. But you can’t. You can just do your job and do it well, prepare for the worst and hope for the best. 

A common mantra in your line of work. One that you always stick to.

But you have so much more to lose this time, and Santi does too, and your breakfast is forgotten as you take him by the hand and drag him back up to your bedroom. You lead him to the bed and lie down on your side, pull him down with you, and curl up into his side. He just wraps his arms around you and holds on like you’re a lifeline.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper.

He shakes his head. “No, I’m sorry.”

“I’m going to come back to you,” you trace your fingers over his dog tags.

“I know,” he kisses under your ear.

You hope you’re telling the truth. He hopes you’re telling the truth. You both hold each other like it might be the last time, even though it won’t because you’re not leaving for several days, but you’re both acutely aware that you have no way of actually knowing when it might really be the last time.

So you just hold each other silently for a while, until a thought occurs to you and you huff out a gentle laugh.

“What?” Santi asks you, peering at you with heavy lids and stupidly long lashes.

You lean up to kiss him on the nose. “Wanna help me run some strategy?” 

His answer is cut off by the very insistent complaint from your stomach. He quirks an eyebrow. “Wanna have a breakfast meeting?”

You giggle. “Probably a good idea.”

Santi plants a kiss on your lips and then gets up, holding out a hand to pull you off the bed and you stand, stretching your arms over your head. He goes to the doorway and says, “I’ll go finish making the food. Meet you at the table in 20, Lieutenant.”

“Sure thing, Captain,” you smile at him.

He moves to leave, and then calls out, “Oh, and Lieutenant?”

“Yes, Santiago?” you roll your eyes, another giggle escaping your lips.

He sticks his head back in the door, just for a moment, just long enough to take all of you in with a look of adoration, and mouths the words “I love you.” Then he turns and goes downstairs.

And you know you can handle - no, you will handle - anything that might happen, and your heart soars.

~end~

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[atlafan]

Heal - One Shot

a/n: werewolffry is here!! I rewrote this like three different times because supernatural au’s are just not my thing, but I’m pretty happy with how this turned out. I didn’t research anything, I sort of just came up with my own lore, and based some of it off of the show Teen Wolf, but not by much. Feedback and reblogs are super helpful, I can’t wait to know what you think! I have some other Halloween requests, but keep them coming! I’m hoping to post one every week until Halloween. Enjoy! (not proofread)

Warnings: Fluff, a little angst, smut (pegging)

Words: 14.8K

Harry, Niall, and Louis are all werewolves; it was that simple. What wasn’t simple was they were university students, trying to live regular lives. The three of them all came from different families, but these families had truces, so they were allowed to interact. Over the years, hunters had started breaking their codes, and wolf numbers were starting to dwindle, so many families were starting to extend their packs to keep everyone safe.

Harry’s family was probably one of the most important; they were healers. Healers were a rare and special breed of werewolf. They were basically the wizards of their kind. All werewolves had the ability to heal themselves, sure, and they could take the pain away from others, but healers had the ability to fix broken bones, extract bullets and close wounds without stiches, they had herbs and “potions” to help humans when they felt so inclined. They were pure, kind, and empathetic. Anne was the head, the matriarch, and Gemma was next in line. However, Harry, needed to be protected at all costs. Male healers…they were easily persuaded, and often got a little too attached to the people they mated with. The women were much more reserved, careful, so when Harry was in secondary school, and started dating…Anne had Gemma give him a little talk about the birds and the bees.

Now, there were no rules saying that wolves couldn’t date or mate with regular people. Because of the dwindling numbers over the years, many partners were being turned. It was essentially like going through the process of converting religions. There was some studying involved, some promises that needed to be made, and some understandings on both parties’ sides.

The boys had all grown up together, and they all learned how to fight and protect themselves, although, Harry hated fighting. As a healer, he had his qualms about hurting other people. He’d always feel bad if he accidentally hurt one of his trainers, rushing to their side immediately to help them. Louis, once a very free spirit, had become hardened after becoming the leader of his family’s pack. No one blamed him, his immediate family got murdered by hunters. Now all of his cousins and other family members looked to him for guidance. It was why he took a gap year before going to university. He also wanted to wait to be able to go with Harry and Niall. Anne was grateful that Louis would be watching over her son. Niall was great and all, but he could be a proper dolt in his own right. He was a skilled fighter, but that was about all he had going for him.

They were going into their second year, and this year they had a flat all to themselves. Being in the dorms…well, it was nothing short of a disaster. They were in a triple their first year, and that was just not enough space for three young werewolves. Now they all had their own rooms so they could do as they pleased. Harry was excited to start his new semester. There was a girl he enjoyed the scent of that worked at the bookstore café last year, and he hoped she would be returning. She was the only one that made his coffee correctly. Not that Harry was snooty, but he was practically royalty, so he had his moments where he acted a little spoiled. He wasn’t sure how someone could fuck up a small black coffee with a little butter in it, but if it wasn’t her who made it, it was fucked up. She was American, so he had no idea if she had just been studying abroad last semester or not.

As much as he frequented the bookstore café, he didn’t say more than his coffee order to her. It killed him. He wanted to flirt with her, tell her how good she smelled, and god, did she smell good. It’s what drew him into the café in the first place, the scent of honey and vanilla. He didn’t talk to her because he didn’t know her, he didn’t know her family. Anyone Harry dated in secondary school he had known his whole life. He knew if they came from a hunter or not. He wasn’t sure how things worked for werewolves in the states. He had no idea if the codes were different, and anytime he asked his mother about it she just told it was something he didn’t need to worry about. The girl seemed nice enough, but Gemma had explained to Harry long ago that male healers were gullible when it came to the people they wanted to mate with.

That’s not to say Harry didn’t mate…he mated often, but mostly with people he had no mental attachment to. He didn’t like the idea of not having a lot of control over his mind, so he stuck to random hook ups. At first he didn’t believe Gemma when she first explained everything to him once he hit puberty, but when he found himself in the woods one night with a rabbit in his teeth that he had killed for his regular girlfriend, he understood. He dropped it out of his mouth. “She’s not a werewolf, she won’t want that.” Gemma had said as she put a hand on his shoulder. “I know you want to please her, but this isn’t the way.” She had chuckled. His sister had laughed at him. He didn’t want to give her a reason to do that again. Granted, he was fifteen, and in puppy-love, but still.

He had learned to control himself, as did Niall and Louis, when it came to the people he was attracted to. He was cautious and observant, and perhaps would just admire from afar. Much to his delight, and surprise, as he was walking around campus with Niall and Louis before classes started, he saw the girl in the bookstore window helping put out inventory. Harry smiled to himself. Even if he was still too shy to get to know her, he could at least sleep peacefully knowing he’d be getting a decent cup of coffee.

//

Working at the university bookstore was an easy gig. Sure, once in a while Y/N would get a disgruntled student who wasn’t pleased about how expensive a book or a sweatshirt was, but other than that things were pleasant. She loved seeing prospective students and their excited families come in to buy their first piece of memorabilia. The bookstore also house a small café for students to grab some coffee and a pastry, and sometimes they’d stay to do some studying. Sometimes she was behind the bar making drinks, sometimes she’d be working the register, and other times she’d be in the back taking stock.

One of her favorite customers was a boy she barely knew, but had seen around campus plenty. His name was Harry, and he’d order a whipped black coffee with butter every morning. She didn’t work every morning, but any morning she was working, she’d make it for him.  Or, that’s how it was last semester, anyways. She had no idea what year he was, he could have finished school last year for all she knew. Y/N chose to study abroad for the entirety of her college career. She had done some traveling in high school, and loved it. She felt way more independent going to school in England, and way more adult. She and her roommates had their own flat this year, and she was excited to really make the space her own. She was in a cramped dorm last year, so having her own room was a major step up.

It was syllabus week, but she was dreading her Calculus class. It was the last math class she needed, thank god. In her first year she had to take algebra, and then precalc. She was a biology student, so she needed Calculus. It was just a lot to balance with her other major courses. Taking bio, chem, and math classes all at the same time was a pain in the ass. Another pain in the ass was that there weren’t a ton of other girls in her classes. Just awkward boys who thought they were smarter than her. She can’t help her jaw from dropping when she sees Harry walk into the classroom. His eyes scan over his options and then widen when he sees her. He knew he smelt something good. He smirks when he sees her obviously flustered, and he walks over slowly to sit down next to her. He flashes her his award winning, shit eating grin, and takes a notebook out of his backpack. He could feel her heart racing, and he almost felt bad, but her heart did that every time he came into the bookstore café. At first he thought it just did that because she was busy, but he realized soon he just made her nervous. Another reason he didn’t say more than a few words to her, until today that is.

Harry turns slightly to look at her, resting his cheek on his fist. She does a double take and sees he’s looking at her. She furrows her brows at him.

“Sorry, you just look really familiar.” He says. “Don’t mean to stare.” He was trying to play it cool. He didn’t want to seem like a stalker.

“Oh! It’s okay, um, I…I work at the campus bookstore.”

“That’s right! You’re the girl who knows how to make my coffee. I think you’re the only one who works there that can do it right.” He sighs.

“It’s not difficult.” She mumbles. “Maybe it’s just the unusual order that throws the others off.”

“Adding butter to coffee isn’t that unusual.” He rolls his eyes. He was talking to her like they were old friends. Maybe in his mind they were. She blinks at him. “What?”

“Nothing…it’s just, well, this is the most you’ve ever spoken to me.” She blushes slightly and takes a pull from her water bottle.

“I could say the same thing to you, you know?” He smirks.

“I’m not the one with the intimidating eyebrows.” She points at his face. “You’re very serious looking.” She gives him a soft smile to let him know she’s only teasing and he smiles back.

“I’m a bit shy, nothing more to it than that. Promise I’m not some scary monster.” God, the irony could have killed him alone.

“Um, how come you’re in calc one? Like, what’s your major?”

“Art History.” She blinks at him again. “I’m an allied health minor, need stats and calc for that.”

“Oh!” She laughs. “Makes sense.”

“What about you?”

“Biology. This is the last math class I need, thank god.”

“Not a fan of math?”

“It’s not that I’m not, I’m just annoyed. I took calculus in high school, but I didn’t know about the math placement assessment last summer, so I had to start out in college algebra last fall. Big waste of time.” She sighs. “Art History and allied health, that’s an interesting combination.”

“Needed a backup, you know how parents can be.”

Truth be told, Harry would go off to be a doctor if he could, but he’d expose himself no doubt. People would catch on to him working “miracles”. It was the empath in him, he just wanted to help anyone and everyone. His mother allowed him the minor for a couple of reasons. One, to scratch his itch for wanting to help people, and two, to learn more about how the body worked so he could properly heal others.

“I totally get it.” She scoffs.

“What do you want to do with bio?”

“I haven’t quite figured out my specialization yet. I don’t think I want to be a doctor doing surgeries, maybe forensics? Working in a lab, that kind of stuff?”

“That’s noble work.” He smiles and she smiles back. “Are you working at the bookstore again this year?”

“Mhm.” She nods. “Sort of have to if I wanna afford things.” She chuckles.

“Cool, good to know I can still get my coffee how I like it.”

“Is that all I’m good for?”

His eyebrows raise as her lips curl up. Oh, she was flirting with him. He has to suppress every urge in his body to not just yank her out of the classroom and take her home with him.

“We’ll have to see how well you do in this class. You may also be good for tutoring.” He wasn’t bad at math, but maybe he could pretend to be if it meant they could start hanging out.

She rolls her eyes at him and shakes her head.

“I’m Y/N, by the way.” She says as the professor walks in.

“Harry.” He whispers, and the class gets started.

//

Y/N bursts through her door later that day. Her roommates were getting lunch started.

“You’ll never guess what happened in calc! That hot guy that used to come into the café last year is in my class, and he sat next to me! He remembered who I was, and he remembered the way I make his coffee. I swear to god we were flirting, oh my fucking god!” She squeals and her friends giggle.

“Slow down, Y/N.” Talia says to her. “He’s just a guy.”

“But he’s not.” Y/N pouts. “He’s so fucking hot, and he seems really sweet.”

“It’s not a great idea to shit where you eat.” Georgie says. “I hooked up with a guy in one of my classes last year and it was super awkward.”

“Who said I was going to jump into bed with him?” Y/N scoffs. “Maybe I just wanna be his friend.” She shrugs and grabs a cheese stick out of the fridge.

“Mhm, a friend who you’d like to bone.” Talia smirks.

“Well…it’s not like I haven’t thought about it. He’s so handsome…he probably sees lots of girls. Although, I’m pretty sure if he snapped his fingers I’d take my pants off for him.”

All of the girls laugh as they eat. This semester would be interesting to say the least.

//

Harry started chatting up Y/N in class after that first day, and he went to the bookstore café every time she worked. Even if he wasn’t in the mood for a coffee, he’d pretend like he was, but it didn’t go much deeper than that. His life was complex, and he had to be careful about who he brought into it.

As he got older, Harry realized he had the ability to shift completely into a wolf, but only on full moons. All werewolves could do this, they just needed to reach a level of maturity to do so, and it was extremely dangerous because if they stayed like that for too long, it was difficult to shift back. However, Harry enjoyed going out on the full moon and just running around it his heart’s desire. It also served to satisfy many of his primal instincts. He could go out and kill a small animal, eat, and feel zero remorse about it. The catch was you had to be naked before shifting, and you’d shift back naked, so you had to leave yourself clothes. Niall thought it would be funny to steal Harry’s clothes after he shifted back.

It was extremely early in the morning, and Harry was standing in the middle of the woods naked. Normally it wouldn’t be a big deal, he could just hop from tree to tree, and get back unnoticed, but he found himself in a well-traveled runner’s path. Plus, he was tired from a night out of wolfing it up, so excuse him for not being thrilled with Niall’s prank. He had learned to control his body temperature, so it’s not like he was cold, he was just annoyed. He needed to listen carefully to every little thing. From afar he hears music and someone breathing heavily. Normally he wouldn’t be so phased, but the scent was familiar. Harry freezes when he realized it’s Y/N, so he quickly hides behind a tree. If she was ever going to see him naked it wouldn’t be like this.

Her music wasn’t up terribly loud, she wasn’t an idiot. Running alone early in the morning meant she couldn’t just zone out, no, she needed to be aware of her surroundings. However, it was fall and she was running in a wooded area, so she strips over a hidden tree root. It wouldn’t have been so bad, but it catches her ankle the wrong way, and Harry can feel the ligaments snapping. He winces for her. That wasn’t even the worst of it. Because of the way she twisted as she fell, her head knocked into the stump of the tree, and it knocked her out.

“Shit.” Harry says to himself as he peers at her limp body.

He had a couple of options. He could easily pretend he didn’t see what happened, and continue to get home unnoticed and let someone else find her, or he could go over there, pick her up, and take her to his place to heal her. He goes with the latter, physically not being able to just leave her. He looks around to make sure no one else was coming, and he strolls over to her. He kneels beside her, putting his palm over her forehead to make sure she was really knocked out. He didn’t want to startle her if she woke up. Something about seeing a naked man over your unconscious body…it probably work out well for him. He closes his eyes for a moment, just to take a little of her pain away, then he hoists her up, carrying her bridal style. He takes a deep breath, his eyes glow red, and then he sprints through the trees back to his flat.

“Took you long enough, what did you do, take extra-long to make me feel bad?” Niall says as he opens the front door. His eyes widen when he sees Harry carrying the girl.

“Got a bit side tracked.” He grunts as he walks in.

“What did you do?”

“I didn’t do anything.” He scoffs. “She tripped, and got hurt. I need to take her up to my room to help her. Where’s Lou?”

“He went to the market, we were low on groceries.”

“Good, keep him occupied when he gets back. I don’t think he’d be terribly happy about this.”

Niall nods as Harry carries Y/N up the stairs. He lays her down gentle on his bed, and her eyes flutter open some as he walks to his dresser. She thinks she dreaming because she can faintly see a man’s ass, a perfect ass might she add, and then her eyes rolls back into her head, passing out yet again. Harry grabs some things from his closet, namely a first aid kit. He starts with her ankle. He wraps his large hand around it, taking her pain away. He couldn’t take it all, and he couldn’t fully heal her. That would be too suspicious. He’d need to leave her in a little bit of pain. He heals her ligaments, though, and leaves it to make it feel like she may have just twisted it the wrong way. He wraps a makeshift splint on her for show, and then he moves to her poor head. She had an egg growing out of it, so he takes a deep breath and pops it back in with his thumb. He rubs his palm over her skull to feel around for the potential of a concussion, but he doesn’t feel anything that serious. She’d have a headache at most so he gets up and grabs a water bottle from the case in his closet, and a couple of aspirin from the first aid kit. Since he’s dressed now, and she’s mostly better, he feels like he can wake her up now. He nudges her shoulder gently, and her eyes flutter back open. She flinches when she sees him.

“H-Harry?” She sits up, and winces, grabbing at her ankle. “What’s going on?” She whimpers, and he thinks it’s about the cutest thing he’s ever seen. Her bottom lip slightly jutting out as she assesses herself.

“I was going for a run this morning, uh, the same path you were on I’m assuming, and I saw you trip. You hit your head pretty hard, so I carried you back here, I hope that’s alright.”

“You…you carried me all that way?”

“You’re not exactly heavy.” He mutters, and her cheeks grow red. “Here, uh, do you want some aspirin?”

“Yeah, thanks.” She takes the two pills out of his palm and the water bottle. “My head really hurts.” She looks down at her ankle. “Do you make this splint?”

“I didn’t know if you twisted it or sprained it, so I thought it would be good as a precautionary measure. I think you caught it on a tree root.”

“I’m usually a lot more careful than that…I’m sorry if I troubled you, or ruined your run.”

“You didn’t.” He smiles. “I’m just glad you’re okay, Y/N.”

She gazes at him. Before she can speak his door flies open.

“Harry.” Louis says. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“Hey, mate, thanks for knocking.” Harry grits his teeth.

“I need to speak with you and Niall, so take your friend home, now.” He leaves and slams the door shut. Harry sighs heavily and looks at her.

“Sorry about him, he, uh, gets uptight about house rules. Niall probably left the milk out overnight or something.” Harry shrugs. He could feel her worry radiating off her.

“It’s okay…you don’t have to take me home I should be able to make it.” She swings her legs over the side of the bed, and uses his shoulder to help her stand. She winces once her bad foot hits the ground.

“It’s really no problem. I’d feel better knowing you got back okay.”

“You’ve done enough, Harry.” She winces again as she takes a step. Maybe he should have taken more of her pain away. Now he feels guilty.

“I could give you a piggy back ride.” Her eyebrows raise at him. “Would you like that?” He chuckles.

“I…you’d really carry me all the way to my apartment?”

“It’s a flat, darling, we’re not in America.” He rolls his eyes and her face flushes at the term of endearment used so condescendingly. “And yeah, I’d carry you. I bet you’re not even that far away, c’mon.” He wraps his arm around her wrist to get her to stand behind him as he squats. She climbs onto his broad back and he lifts her effortlessly. “Light as a feather, you are. Now, where do you live?” He asks as he takes her out of his room and down the stairs.

“24D…Pine Street.”

“Pine’s barely a block away from here.” He looks over his shoulder and smiles at her on the way out.

“Won’t we look funny like this?” She nearly whispers as he carries her down the street.

“Nah, we probably just look like a proper couple. I’ve got no problem with that…do you?”

“No.” She rests her chin on his shoulder. She inhales some of his cologne and she likes what she smells. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but he just smelled really good to her. “You’re a proper cutie, Harry.”

“Look at you using our slang.” He chuckles. “I am pretty cute, huh?”

“Try being humble, hm?” She nudges the top of his head and it makes him laugh.

His grip on her tightens when they reach the front steps of her flat.

“Hand me your key.”

“I can make it from here.”

“I have to make sure you get inside okay.”

“I will, Harry. I…I’d like to run myself a bath, and I don’t need you there for that.”

“You don’t? Too bad, I’m an excellent bath buddy.”

“Put me down.” She says with a shaky voice, and he smirks. He gently lets her down to her feet and he turns to look at her. “Thank you for being so kind…”

“Do you often run alone?”

“Yeah, my roommates don’t really like it. I don’t blame them, running’s the actual worst, but I don’t really like lifting weights much, so it’s the lesser of two evils for me.”

“Text me sometime, I’d go running with you.” He fishes his phone out of his pocket and hands it to her.

“Really?”

“Yeah.” He smiles. “We could be two proper cuties out running together.”

“Mhm, okay.” She scoffs as she puts her number in his phone and texts herself. She hands it back to him.

“I mean it, you’re very cute.” She rolls her eyes at him. “You are! Especially in calc when your brows are all furrowed when you’re concentrating.” He steps a little closer to her. “You get this very serious pout on your face, it’s adorable.”

“Why…why are you watching me in class, and not paying attention?”

“You’re distracting.” It wasn’t a lie, and it wasn’t meant to be sexist. He wasn’t a little boy getting a stuffy from a bra strap, but she always smelled so good, and anytime she moved he’d get a fresh whiff of her. She looks down at her tattered sneakers and then back to him. She felt like she could easily get lost in his eyes. “Will you let me know later how you’re feeling?”

“Yes.” He nods at that and starts walks down her steps as she keys into her flat. “Harry?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m…working later if you wanna come by the café.”

He grins at her and turns to keep walking. She takes a deep breath as she gets inside. She had a lot of squealing to do with her roommates.

//

“Tell me again why you thought it would be a good idea to leave Harry, of all people, in the woods naked? I know you’re bored because you’re not allowed to be on the football team, I’m bored too, but that doesn’t mean you can prank him like that.” Louis was scary when he got mad at the boys. He didn’t yell, but you could hear the clear disappointment in his voice, and that was ten times worse. “Well? I’m waiting for an answer, Niall.”

“I guess I wasn’t really thinking.” He mumbles as he sits with Harry on the couch. The two of them looked like little puppies being scolded for shitting on the rug.

“No, you weren’t.” Louis huffs. “And you.” He looks at Harry. “You thought helping a girl, while naked, was an equally good idea?”

“I couldn’t just leave her there!”

“I know you couldn’t.” Louis sighs. “You just shouldn’t have been left alone. We’ve been lucky at this school so far, I’d like to keep things as easy going as they are. You brought a total stranger here.”

“She’s not a total stranger.” Harry mumbles as he twiddles his thumbs. “She’s that girl I’ve been crushing on from the bookstore, and she also happens to be in my calc class…so I know her.”

“We don’t know if she’s harmless or not.” Louis says.

“Looked pretty harmless when Harry carried her in like a limp noodle.” Niall chuckles, and Louis shoots daggers at him, getting him to shut up.

“Did she question anything?” Louis asks.

“No…I didn’t heal her fully so she wouldn’t be suspicious.” He runs a hand through her hair. “I had to help her, she smells to fucking good to not help.”

“You’ve mentioned that a couple of times, but I’m not smelling it.” Niall says. “Smells like any other regular person.”

“It’s because he likes her. You know how it is for us, we really like the way a person smells when we really like them. It proves the attraction.” Louis sits down on the coffee table in front of them.

“And I know she likes me back.” Harry says proudly.

“Yeah? How?” Niall inquires.

“Well, not only did she tell me I was cute, but she gets aroused around me all the time, especially today when I took her home. I could smell it. I’ve been trying to be careful and not act on anything, but I don’t think I can do that anymore.”

“No one ever said you couldn’t date.” Louis says. “You just need to be careful. You know how easily you lot can get attached.”

“I’m fully aware.” Harry rolls his eyes. “Don’t worry, I won’t be going out into the woods to fetch her a dead rabbit.”

//

Harry started coming by the bookstore even more after that. Y/N had told her friends what happened, that basically Harry was her knight in shining armor. She got excited every time he’d walk into the bookstore. Even if it wasn’t a shift where she was making coffee, she’d make his for him. A flirty friendship had started to form between the two of them. Sometimes he’d come at the end of her shift so he could walk her home, or they’d go grab a bite to eat. She wondered why the most they had done is hold hands, but she didn’t mind that he was taking things slow with her, it was actually a breath of fresh air. And the antics they’d get into in class…he’d pass her notes, actual notes! Sometimes they’d do homework together too. He was slowly swallowing her whole, and she didn’t mind one bit.

“Hello, love.” He says to her as her shift is ending.

“Hi, Harry.” She smiles. “How was your day?”

“Good, better now.” He sighs with a smile and she blushes.

“I just need to take care of some things in the back, and change.”

“Alright, I thought you could come over for a movie tonight. I could order us some food and we can just hang out.”

“I’d like that.” She smiles and goes into the backroom. About ten minutes later she comes out good to go. “Could we watch something with a Halloween vibe? Nothing too scary, of course.”

“Sure.” He loops his arm through hers and she giggles as they leave the bookstore. “You’re into Halloween and all that?”

“Into it? I love it! We decorated our flat yesterday with a ton of Halloween stuff. You’re not a fan?”

“No, I don’t mind it.” He shrugs. “Just think people can get carried away with their costumes sometimes.”

“I agree, some people ruin it for everyone else. I don’t like the scary aspects of it, like, you won’t catch me at a haunted house.”

“Oh, but I’d protect you, Y/N.” He smiles down at her and she blushes.

He gets her inside and he tells her to go up to his room, and to get comfortable. Louis always preferred if they hung out that Harry brought her over, so she was no stranger to their place now. He grabs some menus from the kitchen and meets her upstairs.

“What are you in the mood for?” He asks her. “Chinese, Italian…?” He furrows his brows at the menus as he looks over his options.

“You pick, I’m fine with whatever.” She says.

“Chinese then, do you like dumplings and stuff like that?”

“Yup.”

“Brilliant.” He sits down next to her and grabs his laptop so he can order everything online. He sets it on his desk, and turns his TV on. He sits up against his headboard and so does she. “Here.” He hands her the remote. “You can pick the movie, babe.”

Her heart fluttered every time he called her that. It was just like any other term of endearment, but she still really liked it.

“Hmm…” She flips on Netflix to look over her options. “Oh! What about Teen Wolf, the old one with Michael J. Fox?”

“Uh, that’s a little unrealistic, don’t you think?”

“Well…duh, it’s about a werewolf.” She scoffs. “The whole thing is unrealistic.”

“I just mean, um, oh, look…Hocus Pocus, now that’s a classic.”

“You’re absolutely right. Way better choice.” She hits play and he sighs with relief. “Besides, the show Teen Wolf is way better. I mean, the first two to three seasons were good, and then it just got really bad, but it was still fun.”

“Are you, like, a wolf fanatic or something?”

“No.” She laughs. “It was on MTV when I was younger and it was fun to watch.” She shrugs and looks up at him. “Don’t worry, I think you’re much cuter than the actors on the show.”

“You do, huh?” He puts an arm around her and she cozies up to him. “Good to know.”

She lets her arm fall on his waist as she gets comfortable, and her leg even goes over one of his. It was a proper Netflix & Chill and neither of them had any problem with it. About thirty minutes into the movie, there’s a knock on the door downstairs.

“That’s our food, I’ll be right back.” He pauses the movie and gets up.

“Do you wanna eat downstairs? I’d feel bad about making a mess up here.”

“Don’t be silly, it’s fine.” He chuckles and goes downstairs. He returns shortly with the food. “Alright, I got dumplings, sushi, egg rolls, rice, noodles, and veggies.”

“It smells so good.” She licks her lips and opens the sushi first, popping a piece into her mouth. “Which one’s your favorite?”

“The dumplings.” He mutters as he bites into one.

Eating a dumpling satisfied the more primal side of Harry. It was plump and juicy, like a small animal that he might be ravenous for on a full moon while he’s shifted.

“I like them a lot too.” She takes one and bites into it. She grabs a napkin to dab the corners of her mouth. “Mm, so good.”

“Want some water?”

“Please.”

He grabs her a bottle from the case he keeps in his closet. They eat a bit more while watching the movie, and then Harry puts everything away downstairs so they can go back to cuddling. He pops a piece of gum into his mouth, and offers her some as well.

“We’re gonna have a Halloween party, by the way.” She says to him.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm, would you maybe wanna come? Niall and Louis can come too.”

“We usually lay low on Halloween…lot of freaks come out that night, you know?”

“Please?” She pouts. “I have a really cute costume planned, and I want you to see it.”

“What is it?” He blushes.

“I can’t give it away, then you won’t be surprised.” She boops his nose and he smiles.

“I’ll…I’ll ask them to see if they wanna go.”

“Great.” In a bold move she kisses his cheek. His eyes widen as he looks at her.

“C’mere.” He says, and pulls her onto his lap. She straddles him and wraps her arms around his neck. “I like you a lot, you know that, right?” He tucks some hair behind her ear.

“I think so.” She says shyly. “I like you a lot too, Harry.”

“Can I kiss you?”

She nods yes, and he cups her cheek with one of his hands while the other grips her hip. He presses his lips to hers, and her eyes flutter closed. Her hands slide into his hair and he tugs her closer. His fingers dig into the skin between her shirt and pants. Their lips move along each other’s. Her lips were so incredibly soft, he just want to-

“Mmph!” She grunts as he bites down on her bottom lip and sucks on it.

Harry had learned a lot of restraint over the years, so he didn’t need to worry about his teeth growing sharper or his nails growing longer, or even shifting slightly. He just needed to keep his breathing steady. She seems to like what he’s doing because she doesn’t tell him to stop. In fact, she rolls her hips down on his and tugs at his hair harder. She opens her mouth slightly, and he takes it as a signal that he can lick into her. His tongue swirls around hers, and she moans again. Her breasts press against his chest, and she continues to grind against him.

She tugs his head back to get some air and she moves to kiss on his neck. She mouths and licks over the area just under his earlobe, and his hands squeeze at her hips.

“Y/N.” He breathes. “It’s getting late, do you wanna spend the night?” She pauses her actions and nods yes against his neck, causing him to chuckle.

“What, um…” She moves to look at him. “What do you feel like doing? Do you wanna stop?”

“Do you?”

“N-no, but I feel like we should. I really do like you, and I don’t wanna mess anything up by moving too fast.”

“I feel the same way.” He smiles. “Want something of mine to wear to sleep?”

“Yeah.” She smiles. He pecks her lips again before she moves off him.

Harry grabs her a tee shirt and a pair of boxers. He also gets her a spare tooth brush, and off to the bathroom she goes. She gasps when she sees Louis waiting in the hallway when she’s done.

“Spending the night, pet?” He asks her.

“Y-yeah, is that alright?”

“Course it is.” He smiles. “You know you’re welcome here.”

“Thanks, well, goodnight.” She smiles and makes her way back to Harry’s room.

“I knew you’d look cute in my clothes, but wow.” He blushes.

“Oh.” She blushes too. “Thanks.” She looks him up and down. “You’re gonna wear sweats to bed?”

“I didn’t wanna make you uncomfortable.” He rubs the back of his neck.

“Don’t be silly, you’ll sweat buckets if you stay like that. Sleep how you normally do.” She says as she slips into his bed.

“Can’t do that…”

“Why not?”

“Because I usually sleep naked.”

“M-maybe just your boxers?”

“You’d be okay with that?” She nods yes at him. “I’m just gonna go use the loo. I’ll be back.” Harry washes up quickly, and then turns the light off when he comes back in. He takes his clothes off, staying in his boxers, and then he gets into bed with Y/N. “Did you let the girls know you’re staying here?”

“Mhm.”

They both slide down and face each other. He slots a leg between hers and rubs at her side and back. Harry really liked being petted on, so he figured other people did too. He never got any complaints, anyways. She sighs slightly and moves closer to him. She nuzzles her face into his chest and she realizes it’s bare. It was pitch black in the room, so she couldn’t see any of his tattoos. He pets on her until she falls asleep. His eyes flutter closed, and he falls asleep holding her.

//

The next morning Y/N wakes up with an immense amount of pressure on her bladder. She was laying on her back, she never slept like that, and she couldn’t physically see Harry. She hears snoring from under the covers, so she pulls the blankets back to see Harry’s head in her lap, and his body wrapped around the rest of hers. It was a little bizarre, but not the weirdest way she had ever woken up with someone. She doesn’t want to startle him so she runs her fingers through his hair and scratches at his head. His hold on her thigh tightens and his eyes flutter open. He looks up at her dreamily, like a puppy, and then he flinches when he realizes his head is in her crotch.

“Jesus, I’m so sorry.” He says as he sits up and knuckles at his eyes. “I have zero idea how I ended up like that.” A lie, but he couldn’t very well tell her the truth.

“It’s okay! I just really need to pee.” She giggles and climbs over him to get up. “Be back in a second.”

Harry takes a deep, and gets dressed in some joggers and a sweatshirt as he waits for her. She comes back in, feeling much fresher, and smiles at him. Harry uses the bathroom next and walks in on her just getting her clothes back on.

“Do you mind if I keep the boxers?” She says as she zips up her jeans. “Men’s underwear is so much more comfortable.”

“Consider them yours.” He smiles and wraps his arms around her waist. She presses her hands to his chest. “I’m glad you stayed over. Can I make you breakfast?”

“I’d like that, but I have to get back to my place so I can shower before my shift in a couple of hours.” She bites her bottom lip. “But another time for sure.”

Harry nods, and walks her down the stairs to the front door. She kisses him goodbye, and he watches her walk away. He desperately wanted to go to her Halloween party, but he knew it would be tough convincing Louis.

“Hey.” Harry stands in Louis’ bedroom doorway.

“How was your night?”

“Good, Y/N just left.” Louis nods at that. “She invited us all to a party at the end of the month.” He mumbles.

“Oh, yeah? That was nice of her. When exactly?”

“Halloween.”

“Very funny.”

“C’mon, Lou, what better night of the year to blend in.”

“The hunters could be feeling the same exact way, Harry!”

“It’s not like we’d be party hopping.” Harry whines. “We could go, make an appearance, and then leave.”

“I think it’s a great idea.” Niall chimes in as he heard the conversation. “We could wear costumes that have masks or face coverings so we’re not as obvious.”

“What do you propose?” Louis asks. “The three fucking musketeers? The Justice League?”

“Well, we’d all look fabulous in spandex, so I’d be cool with that.” Harry smirks.

“No.” Louis shakes his head. “I’ll need to be able to see your faces. I’ll go as David Beckham.”

“Wait, you’re serious….we can go?!” Harry asks excitedly.

“We could use some fun.” Louis sighs. “And I know you really like this girl, and we’ve all started to trust her. She’s no threat. We can go for an hour, at the beginning of the night, and then we’re out of there.”

“Thank you!” Harry throws his arms around his friend. “I can’t wait to tell her.”

“Is she your girlfriend now?” Niall asks.

“I don’t know what we are. We only made out last night, I didn’t wanna take it too far in case I lost control. I didn’t think I would, but I could tell I was really fighting to keep my teeth from shifting. She smells so fucking good, I woke up with my head in her lap.” He runs a hand through his hair. “I feel really comfortable around her, you know?”

“Could you not be so stereotypical?” Louis smirks.

“Yeah, it’s literally puppy love.” Niall chuckles.

“Don’t make fun of me.” Harry pouts. “She doesn’t know that I know, but she sprinkles a little cinnamon into my coffee, literally giving me a treat. I’ll gladly be her puppy.”

//

Louis dresses as David Beckham, Niall dresses as a basketball player, and Harry dresses as Zorro, but without the mask, Louis wouldn’t let him. They all walk in, and plenty of people are there already. Harry scans the room and his jaw drops. Y/N was standing in front of a tapestry on the wall taking pictures with her roommates. The three of them were dressed like bunnies, classic 1960’s playboy bunnies. His mouth waters, she looked good enough to eat.

“How nice of her to dress as your favorite snack.” Louis nudges him. “Have fun.”

Y/N giggles as she looks at that photos. She turns in Harry’s direction and beams at him. They make their way to each other through the crowd of people.

“You made it!” She throws her arms around his neck and kisses his cheek, leaving a nice, red lipstick mark behind. “You look so hot like this.” She looks him up and down. “Doesn’t Zorro wear a mask?”

“Lou wanted to be able to find me easily.” He smiles nervously. “And…if anyone looks hot it’s you, I…this is the last thing I’d expect you to be wearing.”

“They were on sale at the costume store.” She blushes. “And the accessories were easy enough to find. We figured it would be fine to dress a little skimpier since we’re not leaving here.”

He circles around her, like he was checking out his prey, and he nearly loses it at the sight of the cotton tail at the base of her spine, never mind how perfect her ass looks with the nylons she’s wearing. He thinks of the thong she must be wearing.

“You’re not even revealing that much.” He clears his throat. “Still plenty left to the imagination.”

“Mm, well…” She tugs at the open collar of his shirt. “Hopefully not for long.” She says against his lips and then backs away. She smirks and walks away from him as his mouth falls open. He was a little shocked she’d deprive him of a kiss.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He walks after her.

“I need to mingle with all my guests, and be a good hostess, don’t I?” She raises an eyebrow at him. “Go on and have something to drink, Zorro.” She winks at him.

“Sure thing, Bunny Rabbit.”

She giggles and continues to walk away from him. Harry didn’t want to seem clingy, so he lets her go about the party, being a good little hostess with her roommates. He, Niall, and Louis all sip on the same drink to keep up appearances. Alcohol and drugs had zero effect on them, which at times was extremely annoying, but for the most part it was fine. They needed to keep their wits about them anyways. Y/N eventually finds her way to Harry, keeping her arm snaked around his waist. She felt special to have him as her guest. He was so fucking handsome, and she knew there were people looking at him, wishing they were the ones standing with him. His arm was draped around her shoulders, his thumb rubbing at her bare shoulder. She almost wanted to pull him upstairs, but she wasn’t the type to do that at a party. No, it could wait until everyone left, when they’d have a little more privacy.

“Hey.” She says to him, and he looks down at her. “I need to go use the ladies room, could you hold onto my drink?”

“Course, love.” He kisses her temple and off she goes with her heart fluttering.

After she’s done in the bathroom, which takes ten fucking minutes because the costume was impossible to get on and off, she makes her way through the party. She gets the distinctive whiff of weed coming from outside. She groans, and steps out and sees a group of people passing a blunt around.

“Guys, not to be a party pooper, but you can’t do that here…”

The group makes an annoyed noise, but they listen to her. Suddenly, she’s alone outside, and she realizes how fucking cold it was. She shivers, and moves to go back inside…

//

“Talia, have you seen Y/N?” Harry asks her. “She went to the bathroom twenty minutes ago, but she’s not in there now.”

“How do you know?” Talia slurs.

“Because Niall just fucked some girl in the bathroom, that’s how I know.” Harry says bluntly.

“Oh, then I don’t know.” She shrugs. “Maybe she went up to her room. You can go check if you want, she’s been dying to get you alone in there all night.”

“She has?” He perks up.

“Duh.” She rolls her eyes. “She’s crazy about you, mate.” She walks away from him.

Concern washes over his face because he knows she’s not in the building. He’d be able to feel her heart, he’d be able to smell her, but he can’t. He finds a freshly fucked Niall, and Louis and tugs them both into a corner.

“I think something’s happened to Y/N.”

“What do you mean?” Louis says.

“She’s not here anymore. She wouldn’t have just left without telling me, she had me hold her drink…she clearly thought she was coming right back.”

“I can feel how worried you are.” Niall sighs. “Do you think she might have gone outside for any reason?”

“No idea, but we could check it out.” Harry says, and they all make their way through the flat, and out the back door. All of their eyes glow red so they can see outside better. Harry takes a whiff, and his head snaps to the left. “Over there, there’s something…an object…” He runs towards it and the boys follow. It was one of he her heels. “Oh, no.” He picks it up and nearly wants to cry.

“Don’t worry, Harry, we’ll find her.” Louis takes the shoe and sniffs it to get her scent, as does Niall. “Hunters may have taken her to get to you, so we need to be smart about this. No fucking around, and no full shifting. Claws and fangs at best.”

“I don’t understand hunters.” Niall says. “If they just got to know us they’d see we’re not dangerous in the slightest.”

“We used to be.” Harry says. “But you can brush up on your history later, right now there’s a girl in the woods dressed like a bunny that we need to go rescue. Poor thing’s probably freezing.”

//

There Y/N was, cold, annoyed, and tied to a tree. She had tried to scream, but someone put their hand over her mouth. They dragged her out into the woods, and she lost one of her shoes. They were awfully expensive too. There were a few people with guns standing near her, and two others pacing around. She had zero idea what they wanted with her. She had cried out of fear, but she was quiet now.

“C-could I at least have a sweater or a blanket? F-fucking freezing out here.” She stutters through her sentence. “Not exactly dr-dressed for this sort of thing.”

“Be quiet, or we’ll gag you.” A man with a gruff voice says to her.

“G-gonna have to buy me d-dinner first if you wanna do that.” She musters up the energy to smirk, and a woman comes over to her with duct tape. She slaps it over her mouth.

“There.” The woman says. “Keep warm with that.”

Y/N tries wiggling her toes and fingers to keep her circulation going. It was only a matter of time until hypothermia would kick in, and she knew that.

“Where are they, hm? Bumbling idiots.” A man says to the woman.

“Maybe Harry doesn’t care about the bitch as much as we thought.” The woman shrugs.

Harry growls lowly when he hears that. He, Louis, and Niall had found the spot the hunters were keeping Y/N easily.

“How many total?” Harry asks.

“Ten.” Louis says. “Keep your emotions at bay. They may be willing to kill, but we can’t do that. Niall and I will knock out as many as we can, and then call for backup. You focus on getting Y/N out of there. Bring her back to our place, and give her something to fall asleep. Then in the morning tell her she was drunk and had a bad dream.”

Harry nods. All of their teeth and claws were out, but nothing more. He knew he had to look scary like this, but he couldn’t worry about it right now. The girl who he was seriously falling for was tied to a fucking tree. Her shoe fell off, but her bunny ears had managed to stay on, although they were a little dented now. The three take a deep breath, and jump up nimbly into the trees. Harry slips down the tree she’s tied to, and cuts through the ropes easily with his claws.

She looks down at herself as she feels the ropes loosen, but she stays put not wanting to bring attention to herself. Y/N sees two figures moves swiftly, knocking the various people around her over. They evade the bullets being shot at them (the guns have silencers). She has no idea what’s happening. The men around her suddenly fall, and she gasps. A figure with a broad back picks them up effortlessly and tosses them into a pile of other people. He turns to look at Y/N and her eyes widen.

“I’ll explain everything later, I promise.” His voice was deeper, and she felt sedated. “Need to get you out of here, trust me?” She nods quickly, and he wastes no time picking her up bridal style, he claws digging into the meat of her thigh, and he jumps up in the trees.

She felt like she was on a roller coaster ride as she clings to him. She didn’t know a person could move so fast, but clearly Harry wasn’t an ordinary person. He was a thing she had only seen on TV or read myths about. Once he gets her inside his flat, he retracts his fangs and claws, and his eyes turn green once more. He carries her up to his bathroom and sets her down on the sink counter.

“This is probably gonna hurt.” He says as he starts to tug on the tape covering her mouth. She nods and closes her eyes. She squeaks out a noise as he rips it off. “Took it like a champ, babe.” He rubs his hands up and down her arms and shoulders.

“Been getting my lip waxed for years, that was nothing.” She breathes.

He looks her up and down. Her nylons were all ripped up, and she had dirt all over her. Did they fucking drag her? He growls angrily just thinking about it.

“I found your other shoe.” He takes it out of his pocket, and she nearly melts. “Did they hurt you?”

“They dragged me through the woods, and slammed me against the tree when they tied me up.” She pouts. “Almost knocked the wind out of me, but I’m okay.”

“I can make you feel better.” He cups her cheek. “But I need to draw you a bath in order to do it. You’re freezing anyways, so it’s a good idea all around.” He moves to turn the water on, and he grabs some bottles from the linen closet.

“Harry…”

“Yeah?” He doesn’t look at her as he sprinkles whatever’s in the bottles into the warm water.

“Who were they? What did they want with you?”

“They either wanted to kill me, or take me as a prisoner.” He turns to look at her. He takes his jacket and shirt off, and her eyes widen. “M’not getting in with you, I just need to mix it all together once the tub’s full, and I don’t wanna get my clothes soaked.” He defends himself.

“No, I just…you have so many tattoos. I didn’t notice it the other night when we slept.”

“It’s really not a lot, Lou has way more.” He bends down to take her other heel off, and he puts the shoes together neatly on the floor. He stands back up and grabs at the bunny ears. “You’ll wear these again for me sometime, yeah? Be a shame if you didn’t.” She nods at him and he sets them down on the counter. “Good, bunnies are my favorite.”

“Your favorite what?”

“Snack.” He says as he grips her hips, helping her hop off the counter.

“Right.” She swallows, and her eyes rim with tears.

“What’s wrong?” He asks as he turns the water off in the tub and starts mixing everything.

“Are…are you going to kill me?”

“Now, why would I offer to make you feel better and then turn around and kill you?”

“I don’t know! Nothing’s exactly clear, Harry!”

“Okay, be cool, yeah?” He stands up straight. “There’s no reason to freak out.”

“No reason to freak out?! I was just taken from my own home, tied to a fucking tree, and then you come and you have these big teeth and these talons, and…shit, I need to text my roommates and let them know I’m okay. Or, maybe that I’m not okay…”

“They’re claws, not talons. I’m not a bloody chicken.”

“What are you then, hm?” She puts her hands on her hips.

“I’m a person, same as you.”

“My eyes don’t glow red, Harry.”

“They could, maybe you’re just not trying hard enough.” She makes an exasperated noise at him, and motions that she’s going to leave. “Okay, okay…I…I’m a werewolf. I was born this way, I wasn’t turned, but a lot of us these days are. The hunters want me because I’m a healer, and I come from a family of healers. They must have caught wind that I go to school here, and they must have noticed that we’ve been hanging out so…to get to me they took you. I feel absolutely terrible about it because the last thing I would ever want to do is put you in any danger. It’s why I barely spoke to you last year. I didn’t want you getting dragged into all this, and here you are now…literally being dragged into it.” He huffs.

“Great, so now I can add bestiality to the list of things that are wrong with me.” She shakes her head, more so saying it to herself. She looks at him. “I’m in a lot of pain, so I’m going to disregard a lot of what you just said, I’m going to not ask any more questions, and I’m going to chalk this up to being an extremely elaborate Halloween prank or something.”

“It’s not a prank, Y/N. I know it’s a lot to take in, I’m so sorry.” He shakes his head. “And being with a werewolf doesn’t make you into bestiality.” He chuckles softly. “You saw me out there, I didn’t grow any extra hair, my ears didn’t get all long and pointy, and I’m pretty sure you’re the only one with a tail on tonight. It’s not like what you think, we blend in really easily. I can shift so I can look like what you may have seen, but it’s rather uncomfortable and unnecessary.” He runs a hand through his hair. “Are you scared?”

“Yes.”

“Of me?”

“No.” He sighs with relief at that. “I’m scared that they’re going to take me again.”

“They won’t.”

“How do you know?”

“Because…we have ways of protecting ourselves and others. I have something I can give you to keep you safe.”

“Like what?”

“I…I have to bite off one of my claws, and put it on chain for you to wear.” She grimaces at him. “Don’t worry, I’ll do it in the morning, and it’ll grow back. I can even paint it a nice color, I have some nail polish.”

“Wonderful.”

“C’mon, the bath is gonna get cold. I’ll step out so you can get in, and-“

“I want you to stay in here with me.”

“I’ll come back, I just wanna give you some privacy.”

“I need you to unzip the back of this stupid thing for me first.”

She turns around and sighs heavily. She looks at herself in the mirror, and is shocked at how fucked up she looks. Her mascara had run down her face, and her bunny nose and whiskers that she painted on had smeared.

“Do…do you have any face-cloths?” She mumbles.

“Yeah, babe.”

He steps over to the linen closet after unzipping her. He hands her a blue cloth and steps out of the bathroom. He hears the front door open and close, and races downstairs to Louis and Niall.

“Cleaned up and taken care of.” Niall says. “I need a shower.”

“Y/N’s getting into the tub. I ran her a bubble bath so I could heal her.”

“I told you to put her to sleep.” Louis grits his teeth. “I really don’t like it when you don’t listen, Harry.”

“M’sorry, she…she just looked so scared, and I couldn’t lie to her. We can talk to her in morning, can’t we? It’s not like she’s the first regular person to get involved with a werewolf.”

“True, but you should really have ran this by your mum first. She’s not gonna be happy.” Louis says.

“I’ll deal with her in the morning too. Let me go tend to my bunny, yeah?”

He goes back upstairs, and taps on the door before entering. She was in the water, covered by the bubbles. She had pulled her hair up into a bun on the top of her head. He sits down on the toilet and faces her.

“I need to stick my hand in.”

“Excuse me?” Her eyebrows raise at him.

“To make what I put in work, I have to stick my hand in the water.”

“Alright.”

He leans forward, and dips his hand into the warm water. His eyes glow red, and she feels every cut and bruise on her body disappear. She feels better than she had before the night even started.

“Holy shit.” She breathes as he takes his hand out of the water.

“How’s the temperature, still warm enough?”

“Yeah…it’s…it’s perfect.” He nods at her and she sighs heavily. “So, you could literally rip me to shreds, and you’re choosing not to?”

“Why is it your first instinct that I’m going to kill you? It’s what the hunters think too, and it’s just not the case, love. Especially with my breed. Healers don’t like hurting others, even in defense. We’re too empathetic. I wanna keep you safe more than anything.”

“Are there others? Obviously Niall and Louis, but, like, in our classes?”

“Not that I know of. The three of us stick together because we’re all in the same large pack. Our three families came together for safety. Other packs just tend to leave others alone, you know?”

“No, I don’t know.” She snaps.

“I never meant to put you in danger, Y/N.”

“Do you have a towel for me, I’d like to get out now.”

He sighs and gets up. He grabs her a fresh towel, and hands it to her. He turns around so she can stand and wrap it around herself. She steps out of the tub and looks up at him. She groans and presses her forehead into his chest.

“I can feel how conflicted you are.” He says as he wraps his arms around her.

“Must be nice to just sense how someone’s feeling.” She scoffs as she nuzzles into him. A thought occurs to her and she looks up at him. “Is that why you curled up with me the way you did that night? Like…are you more dog than person when you’re sleeping?”

“Wolf, I’m not a fucking dog. And…I don’t really know. Sometimes we can do that when we feel really safe with someone.”

“You feel safe with me?” Her eyes widen.

“Well…yeah. And you always smell so good.” He mutters as his hands splay on her back, pulling her closer to him.

“I…I think you smell good too.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, but I can never quite put my finger on what cologne you’re wearing.”

“I don’t wear cologne.”

“What?!”

“It would fuck with my natural scent too much. I have to wear a scentless deodorant even.”

“So…you just naturally smell good?”

“I…” He thinks for a moment. He had read about this before, and from what Louis and Niall said about not being able to smell anything particularly special about her, some things were starting to connect. “Let’s go to my room, Niall said he needed to shower.”

She nods, and he grabs all of her clothes as they make their way down the hall. She sits down on his bed, after he sets her things down on his desk. Her eyes scan over the broadness of his back, and how his muscles flex while he digs through his dresser. She clamps her legs together after shaking her hair out of its bun. He stands up straight after getting a whiff of her. She was turned on? He turns to look at her.

“What?”

“Nothing, here, you can wear these.” He tosses her some boxers and a shirt.

“What if I wanna be like you and sleep naked?”

“Y/N, it’s late and-“

“That bath gave me a second wind.”

Harry wasn’t doing anything in particular, but healers had a way of bringing out confidence and truths out in others. Especially when they seemed to be this connected. They could be soulmates for all he knows, but he doesn’t want to say that and scare her off.

She stands up and walks towards him, reaching around for her bunny ears, and putting them on. She smirks at as he swallows.

“You’re really okay with all of this?” He puts his hands on her shoulders.

“I know I wanna be with you. Maybe I shouldn’t want that, but I do. I…I don’t think I could stay away from you even if I wanted to.”

“I feel the same way.”

“Is…is someone going to tell us we can’t see each other anymore?”

“No.” He scoffs. “I’m like a prince, no one tells me who I can and can’t see.”

“Good, because…” She presses her hands to his chest and lets her towel fall. “I got all dressed up tonight because I wanted to look cute for you, and I’m really sad it all went to waste.”

“It didn’t.”

He cups her cheeks and presses his lips to hers in a searing kiss. He backs her up against his bed, and lays her down. He gets his pants off, and climbs on top of her. . She wraps her legs around his waist and he grinds his clothed dick against her. She groans and scratches her nails down his back. He kisses down her body, and looks up at her to make sure it’s alright before he dives in. She nods frantically, and he goes for it. He licks all around her folds, essentially making out with her other lips, and then he sucks on her clit. Her hands fly to his hair, and she tugs harshly. He moans against her, and her mouth falls open. Her hips buck up towards his mouth. He thought she tasted so fucking good. He was nose deep, moving his face from side to side, and she loses it. He licks her clean and pops his head up.

“Holy shit.” She breathes. He chuckles and gets his boxers off. He moves to sit up against the headboard. His tip was leaking for her. “Are…are you that big because of the wolf thing, or…?”

“Nah, that’s just good genetics, love.” He grins. “C’mere, bunny rabbit, come bounce on my cock for me.” Her mouth falls open and does as he says quickly. She swings her leg over his lap, and lines him up with her. “Wait, uh, do you, like, want me to use a condom, or-“

“M’on the pill, it’s fine.” She smiles at him and he nods. “Thanks for asking, though.” The head of his cock pushes inside her and she bites down on his shoulder as she takes him deeper, inch by inch. She lets out a puff of air once he’s all the way. She looks up at him with big eyes. “Will you help me?”

He bites down on her bottom lip as he moves her up and down on his hard dick. She was so snug around him, he was starting to lose control a little. His claws grow and he scratches at her love handles. She gasps into his mouth.

“Shit, sorry, I-“

“No, it feels good, it’s okay.” She smiles and moves around in a circle on him.

“Here I was thinking you were this innocent little thing.” He smirks and runs his nails down her back. Her head rolls backwards and he notices goosebumps raise on her skin.

“I usually am, but you’re bringing something out of me.”

“Do you feel good?” He asks as he nibbles on her neck.

“Yeah, really good.” She bounces faster up and down on him. “I’ve wanted this for a while.”

“Me too.”

He slots his mouth over hers, and licks into her. She moans into him. This is exactly what they both needed right now. He retracts his claws and before she has a second to protest he snakes a hand between them to rub her clit.

“Oh!” She gasps.

“Gonna make you come again, baby.”

She moans out as she feels it bubbling in her stomach.

“You can come inside me if you want to.”

“Do you want me to?”

“Yeah, I really wanna feel it.”

He nods and rubs her faster. She cries out into his neck, and then he bursts inside her. He fills her to the brim, and it has her panting. He kisses her tenderly as she whimpers. He takes the bunny ears off her and tosses them elsewhere before carefully lifting her off of him. He lays her down, and grabs the towel she was using earlier to clean her up.

“Thank you, that’s so sweet.” She says tiredly.

“It’s the least I could, I made a fucking mess inside you.” He chuckles. “There we are, all clean.” He tosses the towel in his hamper and knees back onto the bed. She rolls over onto his chest as he turns the lights off.

“That was really great.” She nuzzles into his neck. “I’ve never felt so confident with someone before.”

“I enjoyed it too.”

“So, do you get, like, animal instincts or urges sometimes? Like, do you ever randomly chase after squirrels, what am I dealing with here?”

“No.” He laughs. “Nothing like that, although I really enjoy getting my head scratched, like, behind my ears like a dog would.” He mumbles the part about the dog. “The only time I would chase after another animal is I’ve fully transformed, and I only do that on full moons. It’s liberating to just run free like that.”

“Will you be able to tell when I’m getting my period, or if I’m on it?”

“Yeah. I have a keen sense of smell. My hearing’s enhanced too.”

“Oh my god.” She sits up a little. “So did they just hear everything?”

“Probably, unless they’re asleep already.” He shrugs. “It’s not a big deal, no need to be embarrassed, alright?”

“Are…are you gonna have to transfer schools since the hunters know you’re here?”

“We shouldn’t need to. We’ll need to see how many of them are here and what not. My mum might send reinforcements if need be. Don’t worry, I wouldn’t have fucked you if I thought I wasn’t going to be able to stay.”

“Okay.” She settles back down and he pulls the blankets over them.

“Do you mind if I sort burrow under the blankets again? I could just rest my head on your stomach.”

“Sure.” She smiles and he pecks her lips. He shifts under the blankets, and rests his head just above one of her hips. She mindlessly scratches at his head and he sighs. “Comfy?” She giggles.

“Very.”

//

The next morning Y/N sits comfortably in Harry’s sweats in the kitchen while Niall makes her breakfast. Harry and Louis were on a video call with Anne and Gemma.

“Does it bother you that they’re having you babysit me?” She asks him as he sets a bowl of fruit in front of her. He was making pancakes as well.

“Not at all, love. The conversation doesn’t really concern me. Harry’s talking to his family, and Louis is a pack leader so it makes sense for him to be in on the chat.” He sets a short stack in front of her.

“Thank you.”

“So…” He drums his fingers on the kitchen island. “You know everything?”

“I wouldn’t say everything, but I know the three of you are…a little special.”

“And you’re not scared?”

“The three of you rushed into the woods to save me. I’m more scared of the people who dragged me out with guns on their hips.” They hear a noise from upstairs that sounds like a puppy just got kicked. “Jesus, what was that?”

“Oh…Harry must’ve just ripped out one of his claws.” Niall gives her a soft smile and digs into his own pancakes.

“What will me wearing it do, exactly?”

“Alright, so basically, we’ve got this stuff all around the house that makes it so we can’t be tracked. I can’t really explain it, it’s outside my expertise. You may notice we all smoke a lot of cigarettes?” She nods at him. “They’re not normal cigarettes, they have the same stuff in them. It would kill you if you tried in inhale one, so we give normal people pieces of ourselves and it has the same effect. You’ll need to wear it all the time.”

“It won’t just decompose?”

“No, he has something to put on it so it won’t. It’ll sort of look like a shark tooth or something to the untrained eye.”

Harry and Louis come downstairs. Harry’s face is flushed, and he comes around behind Y/N to clasp the chain with his claw on it.

“I panted it black.” He mutters.

“Are you alright?” She asks as he sits down next to her.

“Yeah, it already grew back, see?” He holds his hand up for her.

“We’ve been given the greenlight from Anne, Harry’s mum.” Louis says as he pops a blueberry into his mouth. “But you need to be sworn to secrecy. You can’t say anything, Y/N.”

“I understand.”

“Do you? Because we’re trying to live normal lives, and-“

“She’s not going to say anything!” Harry slams his hands down on the island. “We literally just spoke with my mother about this for a bloody hour! I trust her, there’s nothing more to it than that!” His fangs peak out, and Louis growls at him.

“Do I need to remind you that male healers are extremely gullible? Or did your mother not drive that point home enough for you up there?”

“I-“

“H-Harry…” She puts her hand on his back and he looks at her. Her heart was racing.

“Oh, baby, we’re scaring you.” His fangs retract and he takes her hand in his. “I’m sorry, we’ll cool it.”

“You’ll need to stay here the rest of the weekend.” Louis says. “It may not be safe for you at your flat.”

“What about roommates.”

“I’m gonna go check on them.” Niall says. “I have a class with Georgie, shouldn’t be too weird.”

“Y/N, have you ever taken any self-defense classes or anything?” Louis asks her.

“No.” The boys all share a look. “Should I?”

“Harry will take you to the boxing gym that he goes to and show you some ways to defend yourself. You should be safe, but you can never be too careful.”

She looks at Harry and smirks at him.

“Wanna get into the ring with me?” She giggles and he giggles too. Louis sighs heavily rolls his eyes.

“I’m gonna take my breakfast to my room.” He grumbles and leaves.

//

Harry started going to the bookstore twice as often, setting up shop there for most of Y/N’s shift. If he could have curled up in her lap and sat on top of her in calculus he would have. Whenever he’d go over to Y/N’s place, he was always laying on top of her. Her hands were in his hair, and sometimes his foot would start shaking if she scratched him just right. He was in heaven. Her roommates, however, saw an extremely clingy and possessive guy taking up all of her time. So, they decide to talk to her about it.

“Guys, I can’t talk long. Harry’s gonna be here soon.” Y/N says as she packs her overnight bag.

“We know, it’s just…we’re a little concerned.” Talia says.

“With what?”

“He literally lives up your asshole.” Georgie says.

“He’s…clingy, but it’s not a bad thing. He gives me my space when I need it.”

“You told him to go home one night and I swear to god I heard him whimper, Y/N, whimper!” Talia says. “Also….he likes to call you ‘bunny’, and I I’m pretty sure that’s a weird BDSM nickname. Like, does he make you wear a collar or some shit, or-“

“Okay.” Y/N laughs. “You are so far off. He calls me bunny because I was dressed like one for Halloween, and sometimes I wear the ears when we have sex, but that’s the extent of it.”

It wasn’t the extent of it, but her friends didn’t need to know when they were feeling especially naughty, they would play a game of big bad wolf. Y/N had hot glues the bunny tail from her costume to a pair of lace panties, and she’d wear a lace bra, and Harry would hide somewhere in his room, and he pop out with his glowing red eyes, his fangs, and his claws. He wouldn’t scare her, it turned her on to see him so forceful. And then…once he “caught” her, she was in charge. She’d ride his dick, and tell him to be good for her while she squeezed and tugged at his curls.

“So, you’re both just a little kinky, but he’s not making you do anything you don’t wanna do, right?” Georgie says.

“Exactly.” Y/N smiles. “Look, I love you guys. I appreciate you looking out for me, I really do. I promise, if anything felt wrong with him I would tell you. We’re in a perfectly healthy relationship.” There’s a knock downstairs, and she slings her bag over her shoulder after getting her jacket on. “That’s him, I have to go.”

She goes downstairs, and opens the front door. She throws her arms around his neck and kisses him before he takes his bag for her. He laces his fingers through her hand.

“How’s my little angel baby?” He asks her and it makes her giggle.

“Good, how are you?”

“Good.” He nods. “Sorry I couldn’t be there during your shift today, I was a little busy with the boys.”

“Oh, it’s no problem. I don’t expect you to be there all the time.”

He gets her into his place, and he can’t stop grinning. She gasps when she sees a folding table set up in the living room, a nice tablecloth on it, and delicious food piled high.

“What is all this?” She says as she walks over to the table. Niall and Louis come out of the kitchen with biscuits and wine.

“You celebrate Thanksgiving right? Not like you can easily go home for that, so we cooked.” Harry says. “We looked up what all the best stuff is.”

“You…you did all of this for me?” They look at each other like they’re the only two people in the room.

“Well…yeah.” He takes her hands in his. “I…I love you, Y/N.”

“Oh, Harry, I love you too!” She throws her arms around him and slots her mouth over his. He groans into his kiss and pulls her closer.

“Ahem.” Niall says. “We’ve got hot food here…so…”

“Right.” Harry clears his throat and steps back from Y/N. “Let’s eat, yeah?”

Everyone enjoys the meal. Y/N giggles as they boys tear into the turkey and pretty much obliterate it. Usually they all had manners, but she thinks seeing the turkey ignited something primal in them. She eats until she’s the happy kind of full, and then she helps clean up. After cuddling on the couch (and making sure to go to the bathroom), Harry and Y/N go up to his room.

“I can’t believe you did all of that for me.” She pouts at him as she sits on his bed. He kneels in front of her and rubs his hands up and down on her thighs.

“Do you wanna do something for me?”

“Anything.”

He grins and pecks her lips as he stands up. He goes into his dresser and grabs a few things, keeping them behind his back.

“I’ve been sort of preparing myself all week for this, and I feel really close to you. These last couple of months have been incredible, and we love each other so…I was wondering how you’d feel about topping me.”

“Harry, I top you all the time.” She giggles.

“No, I mean, like…” He takes a strap and a bottle of lube out from behind his back.

“Oh!” She gasps. “Oh my god…you’ve been putting that up your ass all week?”

“No, I used a butt plug, and I got all cleaned out. Wanna give it a try, bunny?”

“Will you fuck me first?”

“Yes.”

She smiles and nods at him. He eagerly gets his clothes off, and he helps her get out of is.

“I just…l don’t wanna lick you down there like you’ve done to me, is that okay? I’ll use my fingers, but I don’t wanna stick my tongue up your ass.” She says as he kisses on her neck.

“Yeah, that’s fine. It’s why I got so much lube.” He smirks at her. “But you have no problem with me doing it to you, that’s cute.”

“That’s because your tongue works all kinds of magic.”

He growls at her and kisses down her body, getting between her legs. He sucks on her clit while he fingers her, knuckle deep. He throws her legs over his shoulders and relentlessly fucks her with his fingers. She was a heaving mess underneath him. She comes around him, squeezing tightly around his fingers. He takes them out of her and sucks them into his mouth. He takes her hand and sucks two of her fingers into his mouth. She groans watching him.

“Okay, I wanna fuck you now.” She says.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” She bites her bottom lip. “I’m really into it now. I wanna make you feel good.”

He kisses her quickly before grabbing the strap and the lube. He helps her into it, and she gets the lube on her fingers. He lays on his back with his legs spread for her. He had trimmed everything for her, which she greatly appreciated. Harry didn’t always manscape, not that she minded, but he clearly wanted to make things as comfortable as possible for her. She swirls her fingers around his hole and he spreads further apart for her.

“Wish I could have seen you with the butt plug in.” She grunts as she fingers him easily.

“I’ll happily wear it for you any time you want.”

“What made you wanna do this with me?” She asks as he gets the dildo attached to the strap lubed up.

“I’ve always wanted to try it, but I’ve never trusted someone enough.”

“God.” She breathes. “That is so sweet. Okay, I’m gonna start. Make sure to tell me if it hurts or something.”

“I will, go ahead.” He holds his legs back for her and she slowly pushes inside him. He tries to keep his breathing steady as she keeps going. Once she’s all the way in she waits for his signal. “You can move.” He grunts.

She slowly moves out, and then back in. She puts more lube on the dildo to add to his comfort, and then continues. Eventually she’s able to get a pace going, and she wraps her hand around his twitching, hard cock. His head falls back into his pillows and his mouth hangs open.

“Oh! Shit, do that again.” He groans. “Think you hit my g-spot.”

“Here?” She thrusts into him again and his eyes roll back into his head. She bites her bottom lip and she hits the spot over and over while pumping him silly with her hand.

“Feels so fucking good, Y/N.” He was starting to pant. “Will you sit on my face when we’re done? I wanna fuck you with my tongue.”

“Y-yeah, we can do whatever you want.” Her legs were shaking. She was extremely turned on seeing him like this.

“Fuck, I’m gonna come, babe!”

She gives him one last good push while he comes into her hand. Some of his gets onto his lower tummy, but he doesn’t seem to care. She licks her palm clean of him, and he moans at the sight. She carefully pulls out of him and gets the strap off.

“Are you sure you wanna-“

“Get up here, now.” He growls at her, and his eyes flash red for a moment.

She didn’t dare fuck with him, so she crawls up his body, and he grips her hips harshly as he licks into her. She gasps, especially from the way he nibbles at her clit. She tugs at his hair as she starts riding his face. He moans against her, loving the way she tastes. She was dripping for him. No one had ever made her this wet before.

“H-Harry.” She moans and he presses her harder against him. “Fuck, oh my god, shit!” She comes on his tongue and he laps her up. He nips at her inner thigh before she gets off him. “W-wow, that was-“

“Wanna take a bath?” He asks, already getting up.

“Sure.” She shrugs. “How are you feeling?”

“Incredible, baby, you did such a good job. What about me? Was I good for you?”

“Yeah, Harry, you were really good.”

If his tail had been out he’d be wagging it. He grabs a couple of towels, and they head to the bathroom. Once the tub is full of bubbles and calming scents, they both get in. Harry sits in front of Y/N so he can rest his head on her shoulder, and so she can play with his hair.

“Are you going home for the holidays?” He asks her, turning slightly to make eye contact.

“Nope, can’t afford it. I just video chatted with my family last year, it was fine, why?”

“Well, how would you like to come to my house for Christmas? My family really wants to meet you, I want you to meet them too, of course.”

“I…I’d love to.”

“And you won’t be the only regular person there either, some of them choose not to be turned.”

“It’s nice everyone’s so cool about it.”

“Love is love.” He shrugs. “So, you really wanna come home with me?” He pouts up at her.

“Of course I do.” She squishes her nose to his. “Sounds like fun.”

“And we can travel a bit too, if you want.”

“I don’t care what we do, I’m just happy to spend time with you, Harry.”

He smiles and pecks her lips. After they get out they towel off, and go back into his room. They get cozy in his bed with his head laying on her chest.

“Do your parents know about me?” He asks as he fondles one of her breasts.

“Yes.” She giggles. “I told them I started seeing a very nice boy in my calculus class, and since my grades have been good they haven’t seemed to mind. They may come try to visit over winter break since it’s so long.”

“Would you let me meet them?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“I’d really wanna make a good impression.”

“I wanna make a good impression with your family too.” She whines slightly. “Your mom is this powerful matriarch.”

“Yeah, but she’s also like any other mum.” He kisses on her breast. “God, you are always as sweet as honey. I always wanna kiss you all over.”

“Mm, I like it when you kiss me all over.” She runs a hand through his hair.

“Your body is so perfect.”

“Harry.” She giggles. “No it’s not.”

“Sure it is. I love every little thing about it.”

“Thank you.” She leans forward to kiss his forehead. He yawns out and shakes his head. “Sleepy?”

“Yeah.”

She nods and reaches to turn the light off as he goes further under the covers to rest his head on her hip. It wasn’t the most conventional way to sleep, but he always made her feel safe, and he told her it made him feel safe to sleep like that. She wasn’t entirely sure what it meant to be in a relationship with a werewolf. It wasn’t too different from being in a relationship with a regular person, they just took more precautions than most. Sometimes being with Harry was like having a pet. He needed a lot of attention, and a lot of love, but it was okay, she had plenty of it to give him.  

[fullsins]

fuck it i’ll just repost

pairing: dom!hyuck x sub!reader

genre: literally pwp (it’s a sex tape, for god’s sake), a decent amount of fluff

word count: 4.2k

warnings (in mostly chronological order): consensual filming during sex, the color system, lingerie, praise and degradation, overuse of terms of endearment, obvious dom-sub dynamics, blowjob and mouthfucking, spit-swallowing and general messy bodily fluids (you know the drill), thigh-riding, choking, edging/ruined orgasm, slight dacryphilia (crying kink), mild humiliation kink, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it and if you choose not to, be aware of the possible repercussions), fingering, eating out, probably less foreplay than necessary but there’s some foreplay, mild manhandling, donghyuck thick cock agenda is back i’m so sorry, some nipple play type things mentions, mild overstimulation, cumming inside

a/n: they stop to talk during sex a lot and yes it’s on purpose because communication is key. also the ending is shitty but whatever

inspired by an ask @junguws got and a convo i had with @ja3minz

“you can talk, you know, we haven’t gotten started yet.” your boyfriend remarks offhandedly, his words light and conversational as he sets up a tripod and camera near the corner of your shared bedroom. if you were in any other situation right now, if you were an outsider to your relationship, you’d assume that he’s just taking some pretty shots of you, in your cherry red robe and coy smile. after all, donghyuck looks relaxed as all hell, clothes still on to the point that it’s maddening for you.

you want nothing more than to feel his skin on yours, under your fingers and under your nails and between your teeth. dispelling this urge proves difficult.

“i don’t really know what to say,” you respond, words hoarser than expected because of how dry your throat is. you dart your tongue out to wet your lower lip as if it’ll help you any, and donghyuck, ever-observant, takes note of it with a small smirk on his face.

“how about reciting your colors for me?” his voice is uncharacteristically void of teasing, meaning that he really does want you to do as he asks. donghyuck’s tone is gentle for now, and you don’t want to jeopardize it. he may be rough, may be sadistic, may be trying, hell, he may even love to see you sob for him, but he has never put his pleasure above your comfort, and you know he never will. you’ve never felt safer than you do with hyuck.

“green for- for keep going, yellow for when i need a second, and red for stop.” they fall from your tongue easily, a second nature. your boyfriend smiles encouragingly at you, soft in his entirety for the moment.

“and if you can’t speak?”

“two taps for yes or keep going, three taps for no or slow down, and just keep tapping for stop.” you’re diligent in your recitation, and the way hyuck’s eyes fold in pride is enough for you to relax against the headboard of your bed. he turns back to the camera once more, making sure the set up will stand on its own and that it’s getting the entirety of the bed, before finally clicking it on so its recording and looking back at you.

“good girl,” he murmurs, almost as an afterthought as he steps away from the camera and trains his gaze on you entirely. donghyuck is surveying what’s his - that much is obvious as his eyelids sink slightly, his expression darkening. you don’t dare to move without his permission. “how about you open that robe for me, hm?”

you nod rapidly, already feeling yourself start to sink into yourself, mind empty save for the man at the foot of your bed. donghyuck, ultimately always fair, starts unbuttoning his shirt as you untie the ties of your robe, allowing the fabric to fall away from you to reveal a lingerie set in the exact same color. you watch, eyes hooded, as your boyfriend’s tan skin comes into view, soft and smooth and empyrean under the dimmed red LED lights that decorate the borders of the ceiling. donghyuck tosses his shirt aside, not registering how it lands on one corner of the bed. he doesn’t really care.

“knees.”

the single word has you scrambling, swinging your legs back underneath you and clasping your hands behind your back. it’s a position you know well, and you know that if you stray from it, you’ll have no respite from the teasing wrath you’ll have to endure. donghyuck unbuckles his jeans, only pushing them down low enough to expose the waistband of his boxers before he climbs onto the bed, moving so he’s directly in front of you. you don’t even have to be told as you shuffle backwards, the soles of your feet eventually hitting the base of the bed’s backboard.

donghyuck chuckles at this, enamored by how easily he has you eating out of the palm of his hand. he hasn’t even touched you yet.

once he’s in front of you, he stands up so you’re eye-level with his prominent bulge. hyuck shoves his boxers down just slightly, pulling his hardening cock from the cloth confines and tugging slightly on it once before leaning over and grasping the headboard with his other hand. he makes sure that he isn’t blocking the camera’s view by straightening himself slightly. you’re mentally grateful the ceiling fan is off, though you have no time to dwell on that as the tip of donghyuck’s cock bobs in front of your face.

without thinking, you reach up, though you don’t touch, not until hyuck gives a small nod, signalling for you to go ahead. gingerly, you wrap one hand around it as best you can, only tightening your grip once hyuck groans out loud, bucking into your hand ever-so-slightly. this gives you the confidence to drag your hand up towards the tip, watching, enraptured, as precum dribbles out of his slit and onto your hand. you smear the slick substance along his shaft on the downstroke, your pussy clenching at how much you find yourself wanting to take him into your mouth.

“can - can i...” you trail off, looking up at the man above you with the best doe eyes you can muster. he raises an eyebrow, and you find that you aren’t surprised. hyuck has never given you anything that easily.

“words, sweetheart. i need you to use your words. what do you want?” his tone is deceptively gentle, and you let out a soft, light sigh.

“i want... can i suck your cock, please, hyuck?” your hand moves of its own accord as you ask for permission, squeezing and tugging lightly along his shaft, thumbing over his tip in the way that makes him grind shallowly against your palm.

“i’ll do you one better,” he grunts out, the timbre of his voice forcing you to rub your thighs together to alleviate the pressure building in your lower stomach. “‘m going to fuck your mouth. open up, baby. wide, for the camera.”

how can you say no to that voice? on impulse, your lips part the moment he finishes his command, maneuvering so his cockhead rests against your lower lip. he pushes your fingers off of his dick, gripping it in his own hand and stroking once, twice, before shallowly thrusting into your mouth, testing the waters just a bit. when you show no perturbation at the intrusion, hyuck moves the hand at the base of his cock up to your hair, tangling it amongst your strands.

in no time at all, he’s set an inhuman pace on your throat, choking you with every thrust as you gargle around his dick. donghyuck’s grunts are music to your ears, even as the slick sounds of a blowjob fully permeate the air. your hands fly to his thighs to steady yourself and to keep your momentum forward so your head doesn’t continuously knock against the backboard behind you. you’re hyper-aware of his fingertips pressing against your scalp, your nails scraping against his jeans, the ache between your legs as your bed creaks with how hard donghyuck is rocking it. a mixture of precum and spit drool from your mouth, leaking at the sides, and your boyfriend must be well-aware of this because he pulls out of your mouth entirely, moving aside so you’re on show for the camera.

you’re gasping for air, tears budding at the corners of your eyes as you try to ease the burden of your abused throat. it’s just the way he likes it. the minuscule green light that’s staring directly at you brings you back to earth, and you know that when you inevitably rewatch the tape you’ll see a fucked out you, gaping at the camera, a mess on your face and over the tops of your breasts, eyes vacant of everything but lust.

“you like this? you like having how much of a whore you are for my cock recorded for forever?” donghyuck coos, telling moreso than he’s asking. he sinks down to his knees, jeans sliding down his thighs slightly, and cups your face with a gentleness you don’t expect. his cock is angry, harder than ever, and you suddenly want it back in your mouth. you want nothing more than to make hyuck cum.

“answer me.” this time he really does command you, eyes boring into yours, and you nod your head vigorously, not wanting to be reprimanded. you’re good for donghyuck, you’re always good for him.

“pretty baby’s all fucked out without even being touched,” he smirks, shuffling so he’s leaning over you, mouth directly over your own. “pathetic little sweetheart. at least you’re my pathetic darling. open.”

you comply, already too far gone to do anything else. donghyuck chuckles at how pliant you are before squeezing your cheeks together slightly, forcing your lips closer to his. you only see his eyes, his dark, blown-wide pupils as he lets a droplet of his spit fall onto your waiting tongue. you don’t move, knowing full well what he’ll want you to do next.

“look at the camera before you swallow. there you go, that’s a good slut,” he murmurs approvingly as you do as he tells, going so far as to lean forward as you swallow to show off how great your tits look from the top from your lingerie set. hyuck places a hand on your covered ass, and you tense immediately simply because of how badly you want him. still, you feel him falter, drawing his hand away from you slightly, before softly turning your face back to face him. when he speaks again, he sounds like everyday donghyuck, the one you love outside of the bedroom. “color, princess?”

“green,” you respond immediately, mustering up your sweetest smile. “i’m all good, love.”

“good,” your boyfriend mirrors your look for a moment before his features settle back into his teasing demeanor, and you watch as he presses his back against the backboard and spreads his legs slightly. “then you’re going to ride my thigh. take the camera off it’s stand and c’mere.”

it’s all you can do to get up on your shaky legs and grab the camera before crawling over to him, swallowing to moisten your drying throat before settling on top of one of his jean-clad thighs. donghyuck’s dick is still out and still very much hard, but he says nothing of it, only holding his hand out silently for you to give him the recording device that’s currently capturing his hooded eyes. donghyuck gestures for you to situate yourself on his thigh as he takes the camera from you, and once he’s got the camera pointed where he wants it, he flexes his thigh and taps your ass - hard - to force you to rut against the denim.

much to your chagrin, his free hand soon finds purchase in your waist rather than around your throat, and he controls your grinding as best he can. the friction between the denim, the cloth of your panties, and your clit is delicious, and you find that the faster donghyuck forces you against his thigh the less you can even speak, only capable of letting out whimpers and whines and broken chants of his name.

“take your bra off, darling.” your boyfriend eventually murmurs, his grip on your waist not letting up. you take a moment to process his command before stuttering out an affirmation and reaching back to undo your lingerie top. you allow it to fall off you, landing in between you and donghyuck, the lace brushing against his cock when it lands in a way that has him groaning. you pick it up and toss it somewhere - you have no clue where it lands - before resting your hands against hyuck’s chest and quickening your pace. he reaches up, twisting one of your nipples between his thumb and index finger in a way that always has you keening.

the moan you let out on instinct is one of the most depraved noises you’ve ever made. your head falls back immediately as your eyes slide shut, and even though you aren’t surprised when donghyuck’s free hand climbs your body to press against the sides of your throat once more, you still let out a whimper at the contact. donghyuck, for his part, is panning the camera down, down your fucked out face and his hand on your throat and your heaving chest and your soaked lingerie-clad core rubbing deliciously against his thigh. your eyes well up from all of it: the friction, the breathplay. you’re almost at your breaking point.

by the way your moans grow raspier and breathier, by the way you can’t even fully say his name anymore, your boyfriend knows that you’re close. it’s obvious, especially considering how well he knows your body.

it’s for this reason that he forcefully grabs one side of your hips and grinds you down against his jeans only one more time before halting you, his fingertips digging into the soft skin of your waist to ensure that you don’t move any more.

“fuck!” you cry out in immediate indignance, unable to stop yourself from glaring at donghyuck as a tear finally drops from your waterline, sliding down your face at having been denied your orgasm. “fuck, please,” you whine out, more tears slipping down your face. “i’ve been good.”

hyuck says nothing, only chuckling slightly as he brings the camera up to your face. you always look so beautiful when you’re in tears for him. the realization that you’re being recorded in such a state has you whimpering, sobbing even harder. through your haze of tears, you try to rut yourself down on his thigh again to bring back your quickly fading orgasm, but donghyuck stops you easily, even going so far as to tut at you as if you should know better.

you suppose you should.

“do that again and i’ll spank you,” he says, shifting and gently pushing you off of his thigh. “but maybe baby would like that, hm? rewatching video of your pretty ass bent over my lap?”

you say nothing, only sniffling over your ruined orgasm. donghyuck finds this either adorable or hilarious, you aren’t sure which, and can’t keep himself from grinning slightly at the way you’re acting. it’s bratty of you to stay upset, you know this, but for whatever reason, you can’t stop yourself from furrowing your brows at your boyfriend. on his part, he only quirks an eyebrow in tandem with one corner of his mouth before languidly wiping your face free of tears.

the camera is still trained on your face. you must look like an absolute mess - there’s tears in your eyes, staining your cheeks. there’s some drool still around the corners of your mouth from when you’d sucked his cock, some of his precum still sticky around your lips. you look filthy, but you know that, too hyuck, you also look beautiful.

he says something, but you miss it. donghyuck reaches out and squeezes your cheeks in his free hand, forcing your lips to part from each other and pucker out. it catches you off guard, but you can’t lie and say that it doesn’t cause you to whine out in arousal.

“i said,” he reiterates, pulling your face closer to his easily with the grip he has on you. “will you be good for me?”

your bratty demeanor fades instantly as you gaze into his eyes, and you find that all you want in the moment is him. no more teasing, or playing, just him. you must appear the slightest bit unfocused, though, and taking into consideration the fact that you haven’t answered him yet, donghyuck lets go of your face, instead thumbing over your bottom lip gently as he cups your cheek.

“color, baby?”

“green,” you breathe out, though it’s obvious that you’re needier now than you were moments before - a feat in and of itself. “i just- i just want you. please? i’ve been good. mostly good. i’ve been okayish, and- ”

“you’ve been very good, darling,” donghyuck interrupts before you ramble, his eyes softening entirely. “tired of playing? do you want me to turn off the camera?”

“no!” you respond a little over-excitedly, face heating up as you realize how hasty you sound. donghyuck’s smirk tells you that he’s realized the same thing, so you rush to explain yourself. “i mean, i kind of like it, and i want to rewatch it someday. i want to film you too, though. can we just do missionary?”

“we can do whatever you want.” your boyfriend agrees readily, pulling you down to him to press a soft kiss, one that you rarely get in the bedroom, against your lips. he hands you the camera a moment later, and you shuffle backwards slightly so you can capture him as he shoves his jeans off, his boxers following seconds later. the sight of his erect cock, tip flushed and achingly hard, has your mouth drying out. without thinking, you lean over, suckling the tip in your mouth and swirling your tongue over his head on instinct.

one of hyuck’s hands flies to your hair, and the other takes the camera back from you, intent on capturing your ministrations. you force yourself to take all of him into your mouth - the hand massaging your scalp helps push you down - and suction before coming back up for air, a rivulet of drool creating a steady stream down your chin.

“shit,” donghyuck groans out, zooming in on the mess he’s made of your mouth. “you’re everything, baby. get situated or i’ll put you in position myself.”

you don’t hesitate to listen, crawling over to the center of the bed like always. donghyuck gets up off of the bed, and you know if you don’t move towards the edge of the bed he’ll pull you down by the ankles. he’s always preferred to keep his feet on solid ground. as you expect, he walks over to stand at the foot of the bed, cock standing proud in front of him. when you finally lay down on your back, exactly in the position he wants you, donghyuck sinks to his knees, making sure both him and the camera are eye-level with your soaked underwear. typically, he would tease you, maybe even make you cum in your panties first before even thinking about coming on his cock. tonight, though, he only pulls them off of your legs, throwing them out of your line of sight.  

he leans up and places the camera on your stomach, and that’s when you realize he isn’t quite done with foreplay just yet. you grab ahold of the recording device and fumble it into such a way that it’s filming your boyfriend perfectly as he leans in and simultaneously takes your clit between his tongue and upper teeth and presses two of his fingers into your core.

“d- shit, hyuck!” you cry out, hips arching off of the bed without much stimulation. donghyuck doesn’t let up, doesn’t even bother to pin your hips down as you begin grinding against his face of your own accord. his fingers continue to work you open as you shakily film his light brown mop of hair moving between your legs. he glances up, eyes meeting the camera, and has the audacity to wink at it before diving back in, tongue lapping at your wet heat as if it’s donghyuck’s last meal on earth.

just as you’re about to finally cum, he pulls away, dragging his two wet fingers across your inner thigh and removing his mouth from where you need it most. the whine you let out is high and pathetic, and donghyuck laps up the arousal he’s just spread across your skin as a show of pity. he bites down, tugging the skin between his teeth once he’s finished, drawing forth another, desperate moan from between your lips.

“i take it that you’re ready for me, then?” he asks cheekily, rocking back up on the balls of his feet and straightening himself up to standing until he looks like he’s towering over you. you can’t even speak, you’re so pent up: instead, you nod frantically and spread your legs in tandem. “you don’t need any more foreplay, princess?”

“fuck foreplay,” you manage to grit out, desperately in need of your boyfriend inside of you. “just put your goddamn dick-”

he shoves himself into you without warning, forcing you to cut your own tirade off with a choked moan. donghyuck allows you to get used to the stretch, only grinding very, very shallowly as you get both yourself and the camera situated. once you give him a go ahead, he gently pulls one of your legs over his shoulders, causes you to tighten impossibly around his thick cock. your boyfriend hisses at how warm, how wet, how impossibly vice-like you are, his hips stuttering as he starts thrusting into you at a pace that makes it very evident that he, too, is pent up.  

you use the leg not hooked over his shoulder to wrap around his waist, forcing him even deeper than you thought possible. the string of swears that falls from donghyuck’s mouth at this is music to your ears, and you’re on cloud nine even as he slaps at the inside of your thigh as a reprimand for seeking any semblance of control.

“i’m in charge here, baby,” he grunts out, voice managing to be both sugary sweet and dangerous at the same time. “don’t forget it.” with this, he leans close, jackrabbiting into you as best he can in the position you’re both in. you’re about to cum - you can feel it, spreading through your body as if you’re on fire. usually, you would last longer, but you’ve been on edge long enough, having been soaked since your boyfriend first stuffed his cock down your throat.

now that his dick is finally inside of you, veins scraping deliciously against your walls in a way that reminds you his girth is both a blessing and a curse, but mostly a blessing, you can’t help but start to clench erratically around him, your breathing picking up as you near your orgasm. donghyuck, for his part, wets one of his thumbs on his tongue and presses it against your clit, rubbing in quick circles as his thrusts start to speed up, matching his raspy pants of breath. he moves your calf off his shoulder, causing both of your legs to lock around his waist as he fucks into you like there’s no tomorrow.

donghyuck leans in close, close enough to place his lips right at your ear. just as your body shows signs of beginning to seize up in pleasure, he whispers a ‘come for me, love. now.’ before biting down sharply on your earlobe. that’s all it takes for your pleasure to overcome you, your back arching off of the bed and forcing your chest up into your lover’s face, something he welcomes wholeheartedly. donghyuck, not having reached his peak yet, continues to grind into you.

you can sense he’s getting closer by the way his hips seem to move of their own accord, donghyuck mindless in pleasure. as you do your best to clench around him once more, to coax his orgasm out of him, he mouths over your breasts, sucking one of your nipples into his mouth right as his hips finally, finally stutter to a standstill inside of you, cum spurting into your warm walls. you can’t help the long, low moan you let out at the mild overstimulation you’re feeling, and donghyuck reaching up to flick at your other nipple does nothing to help the sensations that are overcoming you.

once he’s done slowly grinding his cum back into you, , hyuck forces you to unlock your legs from his waist. wordlessly, he takes the camera from you, stepping back to aim it at your abused, sopping core, eagerly filming the way his cum drips out between your swollen lips and onto the bedspread. he supposes he’ll have to run a washer/dryer cycle soon.

“my pretty baby,” he coos, looking up at your fucked out expression once he’s done. “took me so well.” with a final zoom in on your face, a testament to how good you’ve been for him and how good he’s made you feel, he turns the camera off, making sure that all of the footage from today has been saved. once he puts it up, he goes to the bathroom and returns with a damp rag, and you let your legs fall open so he can wipe at the mess he’s made of you. he runs the other side of the rag gently over your face, picking up on whatever fluids are still left on you. once he’s down, donghyuck leans in, pressing the softest of kisses against your lips.

“want me to run a bath?” he asks, though, judging by the way he says the words you can tell he’s at least mildly tired. you shake your head, holding your arms out instead. your boyfriend chuckles at you, though you notice that he doesn’t hesitate to clamber into bed beside you, pulling your naked form close to his own after tossing the rag.

“just want you right now,” you say once he’s shifted so that your head rests against his chest. he hums in agreement, lifting a hand to gently run it through your hair.

“just want you always.”

[kentokunn]

false accusations; (erwin smith x reader)

chapter one; gambler (3k words)

SUMMARY: Erwin Smith has always been a gambler. His decisions have always had promising outcomes. However, when one of his gambles ends with you in the custody of the Military Police accused of perjury, he is forced to come up with a scheme that will have only one solid outcome, the one which he needs to happen for thee wiring your safety.

His plan- to any other bystander -looks to be another one of his unpredictable gambles, but his long time friend Nile Dok knows Erwin's smile all too well to know that he had predicted every single consequence and what the outcome would be to the bitter end. The military Commander had proved to be far too clever for his own good on multiple fronts.

[canon divergence; season 2]

AUTHOR’S NOTE: This is my first time writing for Erwin that isn’t a headcanon. It’s also my first time writing a chapter story in months. I’ve had crazy writers fatigue so I had to take some breaks, but the idea for this story made me excited to write again! This chapter may seem like it drags on and is kind of dialogue heavy (at least I think it is), but it’s mainly just an introduction chapter to prepare for the actual story. So far, what I have planned out is 10 chapters and a prologue but it might change in the future. I hope you all enjoy, and feel free to leave feedback or constructive criticism!

It was the afternoon before the Scout Regiment was to make their way to the capital within Wall Sina. The Commander stood at the head of the oak wood table in front of a map of Stohess that covered the length of the table. The map was covered in short nails and strings with red, green, and black dots, made with ink, marked along certain points. Erwin was hunched forward a little, pointing to one exact spot on the map and revising over the plan that he and the young recruit, Armin Arlelt, had come up with to capture the Female Titan.

Tapping his finger on the map, Erwin looked up at the four sitting along the sides of the table. "Here. This is where Armin, Eren, and Mikasa will be leading Annie Leonhart for the capture squad to trap her." After a brief moment of silence, an invite for somebody to speak up, he continued. "While I am likely being detained by the Military Police, Levi and Hanji will be planted in Stohess already to engage should anything get out of hand," directed Erwin, who looked at the two in question for confirmation. He was satisfied once both nodded.

"Good. Now, Miche will be supervising a group of recruits in an isolated base located in Wall Rose. We can assume that there are more titans similar to Annie and that they could be conspiring together, Armin suggested this would be a good way to avoid interference from others," Erwin explained, lowering himself into his seat. "This plan has already been told to Mikasa and Eren but I'd like you four to talk with them at dinner to confirm that they're prepared. Everyone is dismissed."

Miche and Levi, who both sat across from you and Hanji- who was on your right -stood and saluted the Commander, Levi sharing a few words with Erwin, before they left the office. Hanji took a moment to gather the map they had brought for the demonstration and said a quick goodbye to both you and the Commander before exiting as well.

You remained seated, brows furrowed slightly in confusion. "Sir?" you asked, as he stood and made his way towards his work desk a few feet away. It was sitting by a window that stretched a large part of the back wall, overlooking the training grounds. The desk was filled with papers and had a few ink stains that must have been only a day old since the desk looks to have been cleaned fairly recently.

"Yes, Squad Leader?" Erwin questioned mentioning your name after your assigned title, raising a brow as he looked up to you from the letter he had grabbed before taking a seat.

You sat, silent for a moment in confusion. "Commander, what would you like me to do tomorrow?" you asked, standing and pushing in your chair, walking closer to his desk so that you stood in front of it.

Erwin placed the letter down at his desk, giving you his full attention as he folded his hands on the desk. "You'll join me to the capital. I'm expecting to be arrested by the Military Police once they find out about this plan so I'll need you by my side. Once the situation is explained I'm sure we'll be let go and allowed to join the others, but until then I'll need you to be with me in case a tricky situation arises," Erwin explained. "I was going to mention this later in the night since I'm still questioning whether it would be better for you to be with Miche, but for now the plan is for you to accompany me tomorrow. Understood?"

You fixed your posture into a salute and nodded. "Yes sir!" you exclaimed. Erwin offered a tight smile in response and dismissed you, returning to his paperwork.

Walking out of the office and shutting the door behind you, you made your way to your room. It was at the opposite end of the hall along with Captain Levi's- who had a slightly larger room than you -Hanji's, and Miche's. This floor was reserved for Squad Leaders, the Captain, and the Commander.

Your room was a decent size, comfortable for one person. It had a bed, bookshelf, desk, and lounge chair that fit comfortably within the room without feeling like it was cluttered. The bathroom and closet doors were beside each other on the left wall, both providing enough space for what they were required for. Your room had two windows on either side of the bed and two gaslights hung just barely above them.

All in all, the room was perfect for somebody who didn't spend much time in it. With most days either on the training grounds with your squad, in town gathering supplies, or on expeditions not much time was spent here. However, now was the perfect opportunity for you to take an hour or so to relax in bed before dinner time.

Grabbing your matches, notebook, and calligraphy pen off the desk you made your way to the right side of your bed, striking the match and igniting the gaslight. You walked over to the left side to do the same before blowing out the match and tossing it into the empty glass on your bedside table that was once filled with water.

Sitting up in your bed you grabbed the notebook and pen you had placed beside you. Using the ink container on the bedside table to dip your pen in you began to rewrite the plans explained earlier by the Commander. This was something you did often to keep everything you needed to know fresh in your mind so that should any mistake happen you could readjust a situation to fall along the original path intended.

This habit had come in handy many times throughout your years as a Squad Leader and has saved many misfortunes from happening. Your quick thinking and leadership in tough situations were often praised by young recruits and even your fellow veterans alike.

While writing your last few sentences the bell atop the headquarters had rung, signaling that the clock had struck six o'clock and that it was now dinner time. Lying the notebook open on your bed to dry and closing the ink container, you stood up and made your way to the mess hall once you put on your boots.

Hanji had left their room at the same time you had, calling out your name and walking up to you to join you on your walk downstairs. "Are you ready for tomorrow?" Hanji asked, pushing the door that leads to the steps downstairs open for you both.

"I am. In fact, I'm currently writing everything down in my notebook," you informed, quietly thanking them for the door.

Hanji clapped their hands together once, the sound echoing in the stairwell. "Great! That may very well come in handy tomorrow, especially since the plan is set to take place inside Wall Sina," Hanji said, opening the door to the mess hall once more.

You hummed, bowing your head down slightly as another thanks. "Yes, that's a little worrisome, but I trust Erwin and his plan so really, I'm more anxious for tomorrow to come than I am worried about it going wrong," you replied.

"I feel the same!" they exclaimed, taking a seat once you both reached your usual table. Levi was already sitting with his tray of food while Miche was grabbing both yours and his. Levi had already grabbed Hanji's tray for them.

You smiled at Miche when he returned, setting the tray he got for you down. You gave a small thank you and properly sat down so that you were across from Levi. The meal was relatively silent between you four while the others in the mess hall were rather rowdy as always. Miche was the one to break the silence.

"We should ask Eren, Mikasa, and Armin to join us quickly to confirm the plan with them like Erwin asked," he suggested, setting his fork down on his empty plate.

You nodded in agreement, "yes, we should. I'll go gather the three of them quickly." With that, you stood from your seat and walked over to the table where Eren, Mikasa, and Armin sat. "You three," you pointed to them, "follow me." You gesture with your finger to follow the order, leading them to the table. Usually, you'd have been more polite in requesting them to follow your orders, however with how few people knew of the plan and you didn't want to arouse suspicions and questions you were required to be more firm.

Once you led them to the table Levi instructed them to each take a seat, to which they took across from you- where you now sat beside Levi. "Commander Erwin requested that the four of us went over the plan with you three to ensure you guys know what needs to be done tomorrow. Are there any questions?"

Eren looked to be holding something in while Armin and Mikasa remained silent and shook their heads. You frowned at noticing Eren's inner conflict. "Jaeger, what is it?" you asked.

The brown-haired boy looked up at you, eyes wide for a moment before he sighed. "Are we really sure that Annie is the Female Titan?" he questioned. "Look, I know how smart Armin is and I'm not saying that his suspicions are wrong, but well... what if they are?"

Mikasa was quick to elbow him, her face as blank as ever, but a sound of disappointment left her lips. "Come on Eren, you know that all the signs point to Annie. You will see the truth tomorrow, accept it." That was the harsh truth. A young girl that the cadets had grown up with was a traitor.

Eren shook his head quickly, clearing his thoughts. "Yeah yeah, you're right, I'm sorry. I'll be prepared tomorrow, no matter what. We'll catch her, I promise!" Eren vowed, growing more enthusiastic with each word.

"You better be," was Levi's reply. "We need you three in order to get Annie to where we need her to be, so please, don't fuck this up."

You frowned, flicking Levi's shoulder. "They're children! Stop putting so much pressure on them!" you scolded, turning your head towards the cadets. "Just do your best, Hanji, Levi, and the others will be there as a backup just in case," you assured, alleviating some of the worries you saw in Eren's and Armin's eyes.

Once the three of them nodded you allowed them to stay with you for the remainder of dinner until the bell rang, signaling it was time to make their way to their rooms. You and the others remained still in the mess hall, however. Nanaba, Moblit, and a few other Survey Corps veterans joined you at the table.

It was common for you all to share a bottle of beer each before a serious plan. Not enough to get even close to drunk, but enough to mask some of the stress if even for a few hours. So, as Miche and Moblit returned back to the table with the bottles of beer, everyone cheered and took a swig from their bottles, settling into a small conversation.

The conversations went from one topic to the other, even a few stories shared amongst one another until the doors were heard creaking open. Everyone's head turned, assuming it was a cadet that'd have to be ordered to return to their room immediately, but everyone was surprised when they saw the Commander.

It wasn't often Erwin came down to the mess hall for dinner, typically getting his meals sent to his office so that he would be able to continue his work, but occasionally he'd make his way down to get his meal himself. He hadn't yet noticed everyone, since he was at the complete opposite end of the large room, but a quick glance around and his eyes had landed on your table.

He made careful steps towards you all, his eyes roaming each and every one of you, and then the bottles you all possessed- some empty, some nearly there, some barely dipped at. "Everyone," he greeted, dipping his head just a centimeter as a sign of respect.

"Commander," was everyone's reply, followed by the same action. You and Levi moved closer to the end of the bench you both were sitting at as an invitation for Erwin to sit, which he gladly accepted.

"A beer sir?" Nanaba asked, offering to grab him one from the kitchen.

"Please," was Erwin's answer. As Nanaba made their way to grab a beer for the Commander, he took the opportunity to ask a question. "Stressful night?" His lips formed a slight smile, almost like a knowing grin.

Levi scoffed, drinking what little was left in his bottle before placing it down on the table with a little less force than a slam. "You know damn well it is Eyebrows," he said.

You rolled your eyes, "Oh please, not this again!" you groaned. "Does it ever get tiring of using the same old stupid nickname? Honestly, be more creative!" you told Levi, causing Hanji to let out a surprised laugh beside you, nearly spilling the beer from their mouth and covering it with a napkin.

Levi was about to retort, pointing his finger at you when Erwin interfered, reaching his hand across the table to gran the beer Nanaba offered him. "Thanks," he said before looking at you both. "Now you two, is there ever a day you both get along?"

"Hey! We get along just fine," you defended, looking surprised when everyone laughed. "Oh come on! We just have a sort of sibling relationship, fuck off," you said, feigning anger when you grabbed your drink and took a sip. 

Conversations once again picked up, this time with Erwin participating this time round. It was a nice relaxer before a day like tomorrow, and it was nice for you to see the Commander so at ease. Everyone knew how much he overworked himself, but all attempts to remove himself from his desk were rendered fruitless when he was so focused on his work. It was only at times like these did he allow himself to take time for himself, and times like these also helped everyone else.

Seeing their Commander with a slight smile and loose shoulders, enjoying himself, was a relieving sight for all soldiers. It could even be a sign of hope for some of them, much like yourself. With little driving you forward, other than the freedom of humanity, it was difficult to find reason in why you fight. It was not uncommon for you to question your goal when it seemed unattainable at times, but when the leader of it all seems to have the hope and the drive for it, it gave you the motivation to do the same.

But unfortunately, like most things, all good things come to an end and it was time for everyone to rest up for what tomorrow would bring. Clean-up and 'good nights' were done quickly, everyone departing towards their rooms, all but Erwin who stayed seated. He allowed you to take a few steps forward before calling out your name.

"I've decided on a definitive plan for you tomorrow," he started, standing up and making his way towards you. He tossed out his beer in the trash near you. "I'll need you with me. Miche can handle the cadets by himself, and should he need help Nanaba is going with him. I don't yet know what tomorrow is going to bring, and you're one of our best when it comes to easing a tricky situation. We need you on the front lines, so you'll come with me."

His tone gave no room for questions, Erwin's plan was settled and nothing would change. Still, you replied with an, "understood sir," before making your way to your room again. You paused when you reached the door, and without turning around, said, "good night Erwin."

"Good night," he responded, a hint of a smile in his voice. Allowing the doors to shut behind you, you walked up the stairs and into your room, deciding to take a quick, cool shower. The cool, almost warm, water helped to clear your thoughts so you only focused on the temperature of the water. It wasn't your usual or go to temperature, but on nights like this, it was a good way to get your mind off things without writing yourself to death.

Once out of the shower, you dried yourself, brushed your death, and did your usual nightly arrangements before walking towards the bed. You took a few minutes to think to yourself, like you did most nights, and allowed for yourself to soak in the silence. Zoning in on one particular spot in the ceiling, you thought about tomorrow.

Everything about this plan Erwin had come up with was a gamble. It relied on the soldiers there to capture Annie without trouble, but there would be no idea what would happen. Stohess was in the center of civilization, in Wall Sina, and the fear of Annie transforming into a titan within that wall was frightening to you.

You had good reason to be frightened too, with what the results of this plan, this gamble, could mean for you and for many. However, while many feared for the lives of their family and themselves, you feared the truth that may arise, because although discovery could be a great thing, change was often terrifying in a world ruled by titans.

But, Erwin had trust in himself and his soldiers. He believed that sacrificing lives for change was necessary in war, much like many leaders before him would agree. Death was a result of war, and Erwin risked people's lives. However, he was a gambler after all.

And he would regret that by the time the sun set tomorrow night.

[arhvste]

MIYA OSAMU - BUN IN THE OVEN

- summary - working alongside your husband brings moments of domesticity outside your home which you reveal is about to become a little bigger - fluff - x f reader

- an - this was based off of this ask an anon sent in earlier today, i’ve posted atsumu fic that links to this one !! thank you for the idea it was nice to write domestic samu :) this is also for @zumisace because i know you love samu and i love u >:)

-

“Oi, Samu! Stop flirtin with ya wife right in front’a me and get cookin, I’m starvin!” Atsumu whined as he rested his head against the kitchen prep counter which was currently occupied with countless cooking utensils scattered across the cool metal surface and various ingredients dotted around.

“Yer just jealous I have a gorgeous wife and you don’t” With a smug smile, Osamu wrapped his arm around your waist bringing you in close enough for him to press a quick kiss to your flour dusted cheek.

“Yuck! Not over the food I’m beggin ya!”

You giggled and pulled your husband back in close to you before turning to give a quick smile to his irritated twin.

“Perhaps we should find you a girlfriend Tsumu! I know a few people who I’m sure would be at least willing to go out on a date with you.”

“Yeah, you’d probably have to pay em first!”

You and your husband laughed lightly at the setter’s expense causing him to groan and sit up straight.

“I have plenty of girls linin up for me dont’cha worry bout that!”

Osamu snickered and motioned for his brother to take a tray of freshly prepped onigiri out to the front of the store.

“Yer damn right ya got a line waitin for ya, or more specifically, they’re waitin for ya to bring more food out so get to it.”

Atsumu grumbled but obliged as he slumped off the stool and took the tray with ease out to the front where drooling customers were waiting to pounce on any fresh batch of onigiri they could.

“You’re so mean to him sometimes.” You hummed as you continued to shape the rice into the correct size triangles as Osamu cut seaweed grass into accurate rectangles.

“It’s all outta love darlin.” He offered a warm smile to which you happily returned. “Of course he’s gonna be jealous I have a gorgeous, helpful and amazin wife! Anyone would be jealous.”

You blushed at his words and flicked him lightly leaving small dust prints of flour on his apron. “So gross!” You whined only for him to pull you into his chest and get you to look up at his handsome face.

Despite the fact the Miya brothers were twins, you still couldn’t help but find Osamu significantly more attractive than his older twin. This was even before you’d fallen for the man. There was just something about him that made him more desirable, not intending to offend Atsumu for he definitely wasn’t someone you’d consider unattractive. Perhaps it was his mature and responsible traits or maybe it was his hardworking and determination that drew you in. It didn’t matter either way though. You loved Osamu Miya for everything he was, physical and personal traits all included. He was the man you fell in love with and he was the man who had wanted you to become ‘Mrs Miya’, a title he often liked to refer to you as.

Osamu leaned down and rested his forehead on yours sighing softly. Caressing your cheek with his warm calloused hands, he pulled your face closer to his and pressed a warm and delicate kiss to your lips before securing his hand at the base of your neck while the other found its way around to the small on your back, drawing small circles with his index finger as he tenderly kissed you.

He was always good at catching you in these moments, Osamu never shied away from showing affection towards you whenever you had a second of privacy. The long hours he worked at his restaurants and home office took a toll on your time spent together, only making his levels of clinginess heighten until eventually it would snap and he’d refuse to keep his hands off of you when he’d get to see you again.

When you had suggested helping him in the restaurant he wasn't opposed to the idea at all. He knew he could count on you and that you were more than capable at cooking after being with him for so long. He loved the feel of getting to be domestic with you outside of the warm and loving home the two of you shared.

Finally pulling away, Osamu admired the soft twinkle in your eyes that he always found himself getting lost in.

“God, I’m lucky yer my girl, my favourite, beautiful girl.”

You hummed gently as you wrapped your arms around his small waist.

“Well, I hope you’re ready to potentially let me share the title of your ‘favourite girl’...”

Osamu’s eyebrow quirked in confusion as he muttered a puzzled “huh?” before you pulled one of your arms up to cup his warm cheek.

“I’m pregnant Samu…”

His eyes widened as he searched for any sign of insincerity in your expression. Then again, you weren’t one to pull a joke like this on him in such an atmosphere, you had to be telling the truth.

“Samu?” your voice laced with concern and worry as your husbands mouth stayed shut as he studied your form with soft but shocked eyes.

“Sorry! For real? Like, yer not playin with me are ya?”

“Of course not!”

Osamu felt tears prick in the corners on his eyes and wasted no time grabbing you by the waist and lifting you in the air in pure glee.

“I’m gonna be a dad? Fuck, I love you so so much y/n!” He laughed joyously as you let your own laughter intermix with his own.

Your home was about to become a family home and Osamu couldn’t have been happier. Not only did he marry the woman he loved, but now alongside you, he was going to get to raise a child the two of you had made together. A million different scenarios and questions ran through his mind as he placed you back down and wrapped you in a tight embrace. Would they look more like him or more like you? Were you going to bring your child to work some days or should he take time off. Would his kid be able to tell the difference between him and Atsumu? Would his kid even like onigiri? Oh, who cared? Right now, the most important thing on his mind was how much he loved you and wanted this with you.

Hushed but excited mutters of ‘I love you’ were traded between the two of you as Osamu peppered your face in soft kisses. Absolutely everything was right with the world in that very moment.

“Samu! Yer gotta get out there! Animals I’m tellin ya! Absolute animals out there! It’s like feeding hour at the zoo!”

Well, almost everything was right in the world.

“Comin yer idiot.” Osamu sighed before pulling away from you after you wiped his eyes.

“Thank fuck and- oh! Were ya crying ya little pissbaby?” Atsumu snorted when he saw his brothers slightly reddend eyes.

“Oh please, yer the only pissbaby here with yer stupid corn coloured hair.”

“It’s been toned since highschool actually, Bokkun taught me how to do it so I’d appreciate it if yer acknowledged that.”

“Whatever and besides, ya can call me pissbaby however much ya like but just thought I’d tell ya, I’m the one thats gonna be the dad to a real baby soon so shut yer trap!”

Atsumu’s mouth gaped open as he looked between you and your husband, surprise shown in his expression. You shook your head at the brothers typical bickering and strode over to the two of them grabbing another tray of freshly prepped onigiri to take out to desperate customers.

“I hope we don’t end up with twins.” You muttered as both boys snickered following out behind you as Atsumu bragged back to Osamu that his kid was gonna like ‘Uncle Atsumu’ more than his own father to which Osamu childishly quarreled back.

Nevermind a child, these two were enough for you to handle for now, but you just couldn't wait for your own angel to enter the world and had no worry in the world as you knew they’d have the best dad in the world and a semi-decent uncle.

general taglist → @atsumuwoah @bloody-bella @bbymilkbread @miracleboy420 @doggonudez @atsunakaashi @peteunderoos @tsukishimagizzard @saturnfarie @toffees-main @zumisace @boosyboo9206

[porcelain-soupspoon4]

You’re Not So Bad (Isaac Foster x Reader)

A/N: I finished Angels of Death a few weeks back, and it was so good! I just had to write a short story about it. I’m not the best writer, but hopefully my first writing of this anime is somewhat close to Zack’s character.  

Warnings: Cussing, Blood Mention (it’s Zack)

You never expected to meet someone like Zack until he arrived on Floor B2. You assisted Reverend Gray, acting as another guardian of B2 after he took you in when he found you as a homeless teen, sleeping on the outside steps of his building. He wasn’t the best father figure you could’ve had, but he still treated you better than the streets did. When hearing the elevator on your floor ding, you wanted to see who was there, but Reverend Gray stopped you, warning you to be careful of the people you may meet. When you asked why, he described the people that held the names Isaac Foster and Rachel Gardner. In all honesty, you didn’t think they were actually as bad as he made them sound, considering that he over exaggerates his descriptions of people to you to keep you safe. Also considering the other psychotic people he had as guardians on the other floors, you could trust your own gut when you met the duo. You stayed hidden in the background while you watched Reverend Gray journey with Rachel to Dr. Danny’s floor. Watching them leave from the end of the hall, you saw a man in a dark brown hoodie and a scythe laying on the ground. That must be Isaac Foster. You could tell that he was bleeding out badly, a pang of guilt and empathy coursing through you. You were hesitant to approach him, remembering that the Reverend said he was dangerous to meddle with and there was a high chance he could react violently to you if you dared to try and talk. But seeing him looking on the verge of death, you couldn’t help but walk slowly toward him. It may seem unreasonable to walk right into danger, but you knew you could take care of yourself. Reverend Gray provided you with a weapon of your own, a basket-hilted sword. He helped you to perfect every swing and stab. Not only that, but you weren’t too bad at fighting hand-to-hand either. Luckily, Isaac Foster appears to be too injured to try and fight back anyway. I honestly don’t think my sword would be able to block his scythe well, I hope he doesn’t use it on me, you thought. As you got closer and closer to the strange man, he fidgeted a bit. You paused your movements, clutching the handle of your sword in its scabbard. He weakly turned his head towards you, his eyes opening slowly. 

“Who the fuck are you? You gonna try and kill me?” he questioned, a sharp tone in his voice. You noticed he made no effort to reach for his scythe, so you let go of your sword’s handle. 

“No.....I wouldn’t try to kill someone if they’re already dying,” you responded. He let out a dry laugh. 

“I hate to break it to ya sweetheart, but I’m not dying any time soon. Monsters are hard to kill. Besides, good ‘ol Rachel’s gonna fix me up. But enough of the chitter chatter, you didn’t answer my first question. Who the fuck ARE you? I thought there’s only one guardian on each floor, unless Reverend Shithead cheated,” he spat. You let out a small chuckle, finding his way of talking a throwback to when you were a teen. Although, he seemed to be around the same age as you, twenty or twenty-two years old. His bandaged face looked confused to your lighthearted reaction. He scowled, “Hey, what’s all that laughing for? I didn’t even say anything funny.” 

“Oh nothing, just thinking of my teenage days. But to answer your first question, I am another guardian of this floor. My job is assisting Reverend Gray on this floor, though I’m not really allowed to interact with the people who come here. But I uh, couldn’t help feeling a bit bad for you, seeing you bleed out like that,” you finally confessed. Letting out another dry laugh, he looked at you with a smirk. 

“Feeling bad for me, huh? Not the best decision. Don’t know if you can already tell, but I’m a cold-blooded serial killer. If I wasn’t feeling shitty at the moment, I’d cut that pretty head of yours off. Seeing you this calm around someone like me really pisses me off,” he said. You only let out another small chuckle, which irked him even more. 

“I’m sure you would, Isaac Foster. Although, I don’t think a fight between the two of us would end so quick. My weapon may be smaller than yours, but I can hold my own very well. If I could survive majority of my childhood and teen years being alone in the streets, I think I could survive you,” you calmly said. His temper apparently sky-rocketed because the next moment, he was yelling. 

“The name’s Zack, you bitch! Don’t go being so confident in yourself, it’s sickening to watch. I bet my ass could ruin all that confidence with just one land of my scythe. I’ll have you begging for your life, just you wait ‘til I’m in a better state to kill ya. Ugh, now I have two bitches to kill!” he groaned, then coughed loudly, more blood oozing out of his wound. You felt guilty again, wanting to at least stop the bleeding for a little while. 

“I carry some bandages and patches with me in case there’s a time I ever need to fix myself. If you need some I can-”

“Just leave it alone, will ya? I already got Rachel getting shit for me back on the other floor, I don’t need your damn help! Why the hell does everyone wanna help me?” 

“M’kay, but you’re bleeding pretty badly, by the time she comes back, you’ll most likely be passed out-”

“I said leave it alone! Stop tryna play nurse, your stuff probably won’t even do shit.” 

“But it’s better to stop the bleeding as soon as-”

“Will you shut up? You’re gonna make me go into shock.”

“I just wanna help-” 

“I said I don’t want any damn help!” 

“Well you won’t be much of a monster by bleeding out all over this damn floor! If you wanna at least live long enough to kill that girl Rachel, you could at least be somewhat decent and let me patch you up before you go all out, getting your own self killed instead! Now shut the fuck up and let me help! Geez! How does that blonde girl deal with you?” you shouted. Your yelling got him to close his mouth and shut up, surprised that he got someone as calm as you to get angry. How can I get her angry, but not scared shitless? It’s like she wasn’t even phased by my damn appearance, he thought. There was a short silence in the hallway, until Zack finally spoke up. “Didn’t know you had all that anger in ya. Heh, to be honest you even got my crazy self startled. I have no clue how Rachel deals with me, but all I know is her messed up head wants me to kill her. So I’ll do it. If I want to keep my promise to her.....I guess you should do what ya want. But don’t be a pervert about it.”

A small smile formed on your face as you took out your supplies in the small medical bag you carried around. 

“How the hell are you smiling after all that? Sheesh, I’m starting to think you’re even weirder than Rachel is,” Zack let out noises of disgust. You scoffed, rolling your eyes at his childlike behavior. 

“Tell me something.....,” he began to say, “why haven’t ya mentioned anything about my appearance? I’m literally covered in bandages and burnt underneath. Don’t I freak you out at all? Why aren’t ya scared?” 

“Well, I’ve seen crazier. I also don’t like to make a judgement about someone based on only their appearance. Sure you’re not ordinary looking, but I know there’s more about you than what I see on the outside,” you replied. Everything that you needed to help him was taken out. You didn’t have any type of alcohol or a sewing needle and thread to fully cover what you believed to be a deep gash in his abdomen, but it was all that could be done for now until Rachel got back. You reached over towards his wound, but hesitated. You looked him in the eyes, as if you were silently asking for permission. He nodded slightly, his breathing hitching a bit when he saw the look your eyes held. You looked so genuine, not one hint of fear in you. Was that.....kindness? No, it couldn’t be. Why would anyone show kindness to him? You unzipped his hoodie, a faint blush on your face. Sure he was an asshole, but it still felt.....somewhat intimate? Not in an inappropriate way, just in a trustworthy way. The fact he had so much trust in one stranger to help him like this.....it was odd. You undid the bandages already on him that were worn out. His wound was revealed, and so was his skin. Wow....is all of him burned? You shook your thoughts away. You grabbed a bunch of gauze sponges you had and grouped them together, beginning to apply pressure to his wound. Zack hissed at the pain, saying almost every curse word you think is in the dictionary. You let out a soft “Sorry” as you continued to clean up the big amount of blood on his body. Once you began to bandage him up tightly, Zack started up another conversation. 

“You’re different from the other guardians.....why aren’t ya trying to kill me? Isn’t that what you guardians do?” he asked curiously. You showed him another small smile. That damn smile, why does she smile so easily at me? It’s not like Rachel’s forced ass smile. What’s up with this bitch? Why is her smile so.....familiar? 

“Well, like I said before, I just assist Reverend Gray on this floor. He’s the main guardian. I’m just someone he happened to take in after he found me sleeping on the steps of this building. Heh, teenager me. Homeless after my parents abandoned me as a toddler. I’m not sure what made Reverend Gray want to keep me. Sometimes he acts like a father, but then I remember how self praising he is,” you sighed, “I know the people on the other floors kill so you expect me to be the same, but I don’t want to kill someone if they aren’t totally out of their mind.” 

“So is that why you didn’t try to kill me? Cause ya think I’m not totally out of my mind? Heh, well I’m pretty sure me killing people for fun isn’t sane either. I hate seeing people happy, sooooo I kill ‘em. What’s not psycho about that?” Zack stated. 

“Well for starters, I didn’t try to kill you because you were already injured, so it wouldn’t have been fair. And you can’t be totally out of your mind if you let me help you with your injury.” Zack scowled at your reply, knowing you were right. Even as a serial killer, he had morals. He hated lying, and he himself would never tell a lie. 

“You remind me of him too much,” he grumbled. Your head perked up. 

“Did you say something?”

“I said you talk too much.” 

“No, you definitely said something else.” 

“No I said you talk too much.” 

“Doubt it, tell me what ya really said.” 

“That is what I really said.” 

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Zack.” 

“Ugh, I said you remind me of him too much,” he said softly. 

“Him?” you questioned. Zack sighed. “There was this man I met when I was younger, a blind man. He let me stay at his place for a couple days. Even after I told him I killed a guy, he still had that dumb smile on his face. He always had that smile on his face around me. It was annoying, him being so calm around someone like me. Pissed me off, but I didn’t kill him. He fed me and everything. I mean he already died cause of something else, but it doesn’t matter anyway. Are ya done with my bandages yet? It feels like it’s been hours!” 

You rolled your eyes at his commentary. “Well, whoever that man is, he had quite the patience with you.” 

“Hey! I was giving you a compliment! Geez, way to be rude!” Zack crossed his arms, turning away from you. You only chuckled once more. You finally finished wrapping enough bandages as you could, making sure it was snug enough. 

“Happy now, angry boy? I’m done. They’ll still get bloody, but at least the bandages are fresh and not worn out,” you said, giving him another smile just to annoy him. 

“Thanks,” he mumbled. “I never caught your name. Since I told ya mine, it’s only fair you tell me yours.” 

“It’s (Y/N),” you said. 

“Well (Y/N),” Zack rubbed the back of his head. “You’re not so bad.....maybe I’ll keep ya alive.”