#and how its SO OBVIOUS he wants to shield them from the bad stuff but its really hard

[eeunoia]

ENHYPEN Series

sinag — psh.

chapter five

pairings: park sunghoon x reader

synopsis: waiting for a great plot twist in your life, the ruthless and powerful mafia boss park sunghoon forced his way in to it.

word count: 3.5k

warnings: a contains harrassment, violence, guns, killings, abuse, obsessive love & other stuff. if you can't take this stuff, feel free to scroll away. let me know if i missed some.

note: hello, i hope you will enjoy this chapter and give me feedbacks. ily and thank you for reading my works. stay safe.

eeunoia 2024 © all rights reserved.

The man crawled slowly over the dirty street, trying to make a run for his life. He grunts as the injury and wounds to his whole body was inscrutable. He can hear multiple footsteps making sounds as they step into the puddles of rainwaters all over the place caused by the pouring rain. It made it colder and harder to breath.

He yelped in pain when someone stepped hardly over his back, pushing him further to the ground. Making him one with the dirty and wet street.

“Where the fuck do you think are you going?” his tone empty and devoid of emotions. It makes him scared and cries of plea follows right after.

He felt his head harshly pulled back by his hair as the man leaned down. To look at this brutal man’s eyes almost sent him down to hell. Despite being under the rain, blood splattered on his face painting his fair skin red.

“P-Please,” he begged.

The man showed no remorse and without a word, he slammed his head on the ground making him lose his consciousness completely.

“Aren’t you going to stop him?” Jake asks Jay as they watch their friend beat the shit out of this poor man.

Jay craned his neck to look at the scene and his reaction seems like he was pretty much used to it already. He shrugs his shoulder off while holding an umbrella to keep him from being drenched from the heavy rain. “Do you want to?”

Jake sighs and just silently watch their friend kicking the man on the ground. It was obvious that he was incapable to fight back or even shield himself from all the hit. He was unconscious, probably almost near his death.

Tonight, the three of them gathered to do some 'business' and since Sunghoon just came from his trip from another country, trying to find his girl, he's slightly on the bad mood. Slightly.

Jay and Jake were already covered in blood, but Sunghoon's showering over it. They couldn't just stop him because they know he somehow relieves stress this way. The look of murder on his eyes aren't fading just yet and they both knew it will last for a bit longer tonight.

“I thought you and Ni-ki are searching for her too?” Jay whispered lighting up another cigarette.

The other man sighs, “Yes. But its odd, we managed to find some informations about her but all of it was three years ago.”

It made Jay halt from taking a huff from his cigs before he tilts his head, “You mean its like she vanished?”

Jake nods his head. Even him find it uncanny how there's no more updates or informations about her whereabouts. Like she's purposely maintaining a low profile or someone is doing it for her? It made him confused and even made Ni-ki digs more deeply like as if that wasn't what the younger one was already doing.

“What if she's dead already?” Jay blurted while watching their friend let all his frustrations out.

“Hell will break lose,” Jake took a deep sigh, trying to relax his tensed shoulder. “Can you see him? He's a ticking time bomb and only her can defuse him.”

Jay smirks, “We really need to hope she's alive somewhere.”

“There's no records saying that she is dead so I think we're still good.”

They both nods their head and once again watch how their friend kill those unfortunate people who stands on his way. He was unstoppable, unable to be tamed. Right now, they knew they had to find you faster or else he will really lose his mind.

“Still nothing?” your head snaps to your side, shoulder slumped so low that shows so much of your disappointment.

You've been on a hunt for your new job for a month already and yet none of them calls back. Pretty sure its not the degree or experiences that sets as an issue to this matter. Your previous boss surely used his power to make your life miserable.

“Yes.”

Lucie stares at you with a look of pity before she sets down her glass of water. She trudges closer to where you are to try and console you. She can see how hard working you are and even if you haven't told her the full story yet, she knew it wasn't you who caused all the troubles.

“Why don't you just try applying on my previous work place? I mean, its not as big as your salary before, but its not a bad pay.”

Your eyes looks at her, “Yeah, maybe I should do that. Thank you so much Lucie.”

She smiles and caress your back. “No problem. I’ll send you the details for the HR department so you can send your resume.”

You nod your head and watch her walk back to the room adjacent to yours. Things may had been rough with you, but you are lucky enough to have her beside you. It's still amusing for you how she’s very nice. Guess its really true that whenever someone leaves and go, somebody will arrive on your life.

It wasn’t hard to get an interview appointment for the said company. It was a lot smaller than your old work, but that's fine. This isn't the time to be picky specially if you're starting to deplete your savings.

They replied with your said schedule of interview and the things you need to prepare for the application. It made you hopeful despite knowing the possibility of not being accepted again. These are the usual routine. You send your resume, they reply with your schedule for interview, interview you and then ask you to wait for nothing. Eitherway you let yourself hope and dressed up for it.

The company was discarding lots of employees for the past week now since they had a new boss. The information raised your expectation to be accepted since they're in need of people.

Your heart thumped inside your chest as you wait patiently for your turn. The ac was on, you're sure of it, but you're sweating cold. It was not a foreign feeling. Just like whenever a teacher asks you to recite something in front of everybody in your class or taking one of your biggest exams. It made your palms sweaty and your feet tapping lightly to the floor. It was a dreadful feeling.

On the other hand, Jake's eyes lazily watch the view from inside his vehicle. He felt his phone ringing so he fished it from his coat and answered.

“Dude, where are you?”

He sighs, “I’m going to work. What do you want, Jay?”

His friend's whine can be heard from the other line that tugs the corner of his lips upwards. “It's a saturday? Come on.”

“I can’t. I’m in the middle of rebuilding this new company I bought.”

“The one near your mall? Why did you even bought that when it doesn't even match your own companies?”

“It does have income and regenerating well for years now. I can check on what I can do to improve it and if not, I can just demolish and use the land to extend my mall.”

Jay lets out a sigh, he just couldn't believe how Jake is a monster in this field of work. He is pretty smart, he'll give him that, but when it comes to business he's on a different level. Mainly why most of their friends comes to him for advice.

“Fine, call me later after you finish playing with your toys.”

Jake chuckles, “All right.”

He ended the call just in time of their arrival at the said company. His men opens the door for him and the handsome bachelor steps outside proudly. He walks inside and workers started to greet him, paying full respect for him. His serious demeanor didn't falter and just head straight for the lift, going to his office.

As he arrives, line of people caught his attention. He was about to ask what's it all about when he remembered how he command for them to hire new employees after he dismissed most of them. He wanted this company working as to the way he wanted it to be. So those who are not in line with his vision, he gets rid of them.

“Mr. Sim.” his secretary for this company greets him with a flushing cheeks. He kept his placid expression and wait for what she's about to say.

“We already started to interview applicants for the job vacancies.” she said trying hard to check any positive reaction from him.

Jake's eyes roams around carefully as she continues to fill him through the updates from the things he asked them to do. Slowly, her voice became muffled as his eyes get caught at something that made him utterly surprised.

He pursed his lips, brows furrowing hardly at the sight of a girl a few feet away from where he's standing. Her nervous face was obvious as she continuous to fidget with her fingers. Jake doesn't know what to think. He was so close to asking his men if he's starting to see things, but then he snapped himself back to his senses.

“Who is she?” her secretary snaps her head in a hurry to follow his line of sight.

She hesitates and look back from you and Jake, just to check if she's getting it right.

“She's probably one of the applicants for the job.” her eyes dropping over the folder she was holding.

Jake didn't talk and kept his stance. He resets his mind to come up with his new plan and for his next move. He was always careful and never reckless.

“Ohh...” his assistant talks with a tone sounding a little bit astound. He looks at her as she checks her file.

“Why?”

“She's being blacklisted.”

Jake's forehead furrowed at the information he heard. This thing was already common in the world of business. People that have power uses this method to make sure someone they don't really like cannot be accepted in any company they are associated on.

“Blacklisted? By who?”

“Mr. Kang.” she answered quickly.

There's a lot of Kang in the industry of business, but since he knew whose the main investors of this company he already have an idea which Kang she's referring to. It slowly lights up curiosity over him on what did you possibly do to make him so upset to the point he was making your life this miserable.

Was he your ex boyfriend? Jake couldn't help but to scoff inside his mind at the thought of what Sunghoon will do to him once he found out. He may lose his mind and make Mr. Kang regret he even walked this earth.

Jake sighs, trying to hold his excitement.

“I want her in my office in five minutes. I will interview her myself.” he announced that surprised her assistant.

He starts heading towards his office and she follows him, “But Mr. Kang's instruction is to not accept her even in interviews.”

Jake didn't say anything and just lightly cranes his head to stare at her. Chills run through her spine at the strictness that lingers through his eyes. She instantly regrets insisting about what Mr. Kang instructed.

“R-Right away, sir.” she bows her head in a submissive manner before politely excusing herself to do as he say.

He trudges towards his office while fishing his phone from his coat. His men follows silently, waiting for anything he will order them to do.

“Riki.” Jake sighs, despite the calm demeanor he couldn't help but to flash a small smile over his lips.

“What hyung?” the younger one sounds in a rush.

“I found her.”

“Who?” his response made him roll his eyes in disbelief. Is he that distracted that he forgot their main agenda?

“Sunghoon's obsession.”

The other line went silent. Jake even furrowed in confusion and checked if Ni-ki turned off the call, but no. It's still going. He put his phone back to his ears.

“Hey,”

“No way, hyung? Are you for real?” now he sounded so interested. He smirks, remembering how he reacted moments ago after seeing you.

Who would not react that way? Sunghoon's been searching for you for years already and to see you now is just amusing. So he really did saw you and not losing his mind. Jake felt relieved, but also a little worried of how things will work out after this.

“Yes. I’ll send you her details later so you can go dig for her informations again.”

“All right. I’ll be waiting.”

They bid good-byes and Jake started preparing himself for your arrival. He's sure that his assistant will escort you inside any minute now.

Jake's was an inch close to call Sunghoon and deliver him the good news, but he's smarter than that. He knew better than to spoil the moment and mess things up. Of course he wants his friend to see you and finally put an end to his miserable search operations. He needs to think things through and come up with the best plans in order to help his friend.

“Miss Aelia?” your head lifts up after hearing your name. The lady who asked you to wait in line from a while ago was in front of you. She's holding this folder and she have this warry expression on her face.

Your eyes glanced around to check what's up and its still not yet your turn for the interview. Chest started beating fast and you worry that things are starting to be messed up once again. Shoulders already falling, you looked up at her with a pitiful eyes.

“Y-Yes?” you are so ready to pack up and leave when she flashes you a small smile.

“Kindly follow me.”

A bit bewildered that she didn't sent you home, you managed to stand up on your feet and follow behind her. People sitting beside you were also confused but has nothing much that they can do.

She guides you towards this hallway leading to a more secluded part of the floor. And your heart sank when you read that its the president's office.

Your hand unconsciously reached over your skirt, flattening it a bit. Next is your hair that you fixed and just in time, she asked you to wait for a bit.

She enters the room and not a minute long, she peaked through the door then asked you to come inside. You nodded and gulped, feeling your throat getting dry. To say that you are nervous was an understatement. Your breathing are fast and heavy, like your heart will jump out from your chest. Your palms both so sweaty and your throat running dry despite the continuous attempt of washing it off with your saliva.

The officed looked a little messy, like things are being moved from here and there. Maybe because they have a new president, the office are being renovated. But any of that should be the least of your concern because at the center of that said room, was Jake Sim.

The moment you laid eyes on him, you are slightly shook. He was handsome, very handsome to be exact. He has this mullet length black hair that seemed so soft. Plump lips and big doe eyes that reminds you of puppy eyes. Funny, because for someone who have delicate features, he sure is intimidating.

You feel very nervous as you took more steps closer to his visitor's chair that was placed in front of his desk.

“Good day, S-Sir.” you stuttered a little as he kept his eyes fixed at your direction.

You can't really tell what's in his mind at the moment. His stares remained and you couldn’t help but to feel odd about it. He didn't say anything even after his secretary has left the room. It's already been a minute.

Something about his stares makes you feel more nervous and somehow anxious. The urge to stand up and leave slowly intoxicated your mind, but you know this isn't the right time to let your trauma from your previous boss take over you.

“S-Sir?” you tried catching his attention.

That visibly snapped Jake back to his senses. He cleared his throat, a bit embarrassed for staring too much. He cursed inside his mind, knocking his senses back to his system. He needs to collect himself and not mess this up. Surely it was fascinating seeing you here inside his office, but frightening you would be the last thing he wanted.

“So,” he draws in a sigh before grabbing a piece of paper to write on. “Miss Aelia, huh?”

Your head bops lightly and a short “Yes, Sir.” follows.

Jake scanned the folder he was holding. All the basic informations that Ni-ki had given him are mostly here. He clicked his tongue and tilts his head over to the side.

“Where are you currently staying?”

His question made you purse your lips tightly, contemplating whether to tell him or not. Various things clouded your mind, some of them even appropriate. You couldn’t help it, what happened to you in the past caused all of these.

“W-Why...”

Seems like the man in front of you noticed your expression so he was quick to pull off a small smile. He still looked intimidating, but it somehow ease your worry.

“If you’re living far from the premises we are to offer you a place to your convenience. Also a car for you to use to travel back and fort all expense will taken care of the company.” he offered.

You were caught off-guard by what he said. Is this how it usually is? Company aren’t this generous when it comes to new employees so you’re a little confused, but at the same time tempted. A place to stay sounds great and a vehicle? Sure sounds very convenient too.

“I live a bit far from here, Sir.” you answered that made him nod his head slowly, eyes trailing back towards the folder he was holding.

“Are you single or already married?” his eyes are fixed at your resume. It took you a while to answer that made him glance back up to you.

“Your benefits will be based on your civil status.” you felt embarrassed for thinking differently of his question.

“O-Oh! I’m single, Sir.”

Jake smiles and nods his head before resuming to reading your informations.

Its not that it even matter whether you’re single or not. In the end, Sunghoon will still do everything in his will to get you. But it’s good to know you are single, at least a soul was saved from his friend’s wrath.

“T-That’s actually great, Sir.” you managed to utter. His eyes lits up and lips lifts up in eagerness.

“So you’re accepting the job?” he sounds hopeful making you furrow your brows, addled with all of the things that’s happening.

“Y-Yes, but aren’t you going to interview me?” your tone sounded too soft for Jake. He knew Sunghoon will go crazy for it and he couldn’t wait for you two to meet. But there’s still a lot of things to take care of.

He lifts his head up to glance at you, tearing his gaze off from your resume that contains all the details he wanted from you. He shows a confident smile, making blushed a bit, getting caught off-guard by his visuals.

“I just did.” he shrugs his shoulders off in a relax manner.

Despite being a little confused as to how things just ended so well, you couldn’t help but to feel giddy to actually get the job.

“S-So I’m hired?”

Jake nods, “Yes. You can start on monday. Sounds good?”

Your lips stretched into a wide smile as you accept Jake’s hands. “Yes, Sir! Thank you so much! I will do my best and I will not disappoint you.”

He smirks and nods then watch how his secretary escorts you outside his office. It’s been two minutes since you left, but he was still staring straight at the door right in front of him. He couldn’t believe it.

He stood up and fishes his phone from his pocket, a big playful smirk plays over his lips while waiting for someone to pick up his call.

'“What?” Sunghoon hissed at him.

Jake scoffs, clearly not surprised to his friend’s arrogance.

“10 Million.” he started.

“The fuck you saying?”

“I’m selling you this new company I acquired and currently revisioning.”

This time, it was his friend’s turn to scoff at him.

“Ten Million? What? Is there some gold hidden in that company or something?” Sunghoon asks, very sarcastic.

Jake’s grin grew wider, wanting so bad to spill the great news to his friend.

“You can say that.”

Sunghoon didn’t respond right away and just thought of what his friend was offering. He may not be the best one when it comes to business, but he sure not a dumb person. Jake rarely sells him property unless it was worth it or he can benefit from it in the near future. He trust his friend.

He sighs, “I’ll send you the check tomorrow.” and ended the call right away.

Jake laughs and put back his phone inside his pocket. “God damn, this is fun.”

main master-list

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@heeseung-min

[ordinaryschmuck]

Alright, last time ever that I’ll talk about Velma. I promise.

Because I’ve been extra salty towards this show all week, and I don’t want to take it further than that. Talking nothing but bad stuff about this show for the entirety of its run is exactly what the writers want. They want us to hate watch it so we can talk about each new atrocity the show brings up week after week, and call us haters or anti-woke propagandists. When, in reality, they don’t give a FUCK about any of that. They don’t care about other races, genders, or sexualities. They just WANT you to think they do. Know how I can tell? Because I’ve SEEN genuine attempts of representation.

THIS is a genuine attempt of representation. Matt Braly, the series creator of Amphibia and a Thai-American, felt like Thai culture was underrepresented in media. So, he not only made his main character and her Thai, but he also dedicated subplots and entire episodes showcasing the culture he wanted to represent.

THIS is a genuine attempt at representation. Dana Terrace, series creator of The Owl House and open Bisexual, wanted a main character that was explicitly bi to finally help kids feel like they’re seen. To help give the representation SHE always wanted.

But when I look at Velma? None of it hits the same.

This isn’t a genuine attempt for representation. This is Mindy Kuling turning a character into a self-insert to make herself look smarter than everyone else and the most important person in a narrative. Truth is, this Velma is nothing more than a sociopath, narcissistic dipshit who thinks she’s better than everyone else but is actually more aggravating than endearing.

So...Good job representing YOURSELF there, Mindy.

And this?

This isn’t representation. This is a shield.

A way to protect the show from any criticism because it couldn’t possibly be bad. They have gay characters! Gay characters are good in everything!

Except that is the LAST reason you should include gay characters! Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE more LGBTQA+ representation in media. What I don’t love is obvious attempts to pander to audiences just to avoid criticisms. And keep in mind, this is NOT the first attempt a creator wanted to make Velma gay.

James Gunn wanted to make her gay in the live action movie, but WB said no.

Scooby-Doo: Mystery Incorporated (the GOAT of the Scooby-Doo franchise) wanted to make Velma gay, but could only imply it because Cartoon Network didn’t greenlit Steven Universe yet.

THOSE are genuine attempts to make Velma gay, to represent people because the creators of both products agreed that it was the least they could do.

But making Velma and Daphne a thing just to protect a show is nothing more than shallow and inconsiderate of the hard fight dozens of people put up with for the sake of representation.

And, honestly, I’d be a little more forgiving if the writing in Velma was good. But it’s not.

Within the first minute, this show features...

Cockroaches having sex...

And fifteen year olds taking a shower to make a joke about how over-sexualized a series’ pilot can be.

First of all: FUCK YOU FOR MAKING ME FIND THIS SCREEN SHOT FOR A POINT!

Second: You lose every ounce of credibility that you actually care about people when one of the first moves you make in your series is to sexualize minors for the sake of a joke.

A joke that doesn’t make sense at that. Point me to a series pilot that’s over-sexualized. If you get more than ten, I’ll say you have a point. I won’t say that sexualizing minors to make it was a good thing, but I’ll at least say that, “Yeah. You’re right. So many pilots do this. SO STOP DOING IT!”

That’s the level of writing Velma has. And it’s why they have their “representation” to protect themselves. Meanwhile, you want to know the level of writing you’ll find in The Owl House and Amphibia?

Villains who prove that the most dangerous people are the ones who make the rules.

Jokes that are actually funny.

Likable main protagonists who are kind and caring to the people around them.

Protagonists who have heartfelt relationships with other great characters, to the point that it breaks your heart to see them leave each other.

And on top of that, actually good representation. But here’s the thing: The representation isn’t only genuine. It’s a bonus. Something great to add onto everything else the writers and the creators do right.

What it isn’t is an attempt to protect a show from what it does wrong.

And that’s it. That’s the LAST time I’ll ever talk about Velma. I really mean it this time.

Talking about this show past it’s premier is already more attention it deserves. And if you were smart, you would not only stop watching, but stop talking. The best attention to give something you hate is NO attention.

If you really want to waste time, waste it by watching something good, like The Owl House and Amphibia. They may be kids shows, but they have more maturity than a single second of Velma.

[hugintheraven]

The Undersiders and their Overwatch mains

(This will use OW1's 2/2/2 comp because that's what makes sense and will ignore any chars introduced after the point where that ceased to be relevant) (Obviously this team is initially sponsored by Thomas Calvert/Coil).

Grue: Reinhardt. He protects others, he likes how tactical Rein vs Rein can be, he's big and hits stuff, but it's not overly complicated or focused on accuracy. Brian can and does learn the other main tanks, and later on his Sigma is disgusting, but he was really happiest when it was just him and a shield trying to out-time some other guy with a shield, with the entire team on the line if either screwed up.

Hellhound: Off-Tanks. She doesn't have a main, preferring to pick a char depending on the situation(even going Mei/Brig/Winston if off-tanks are bad in the current patch), but "get in front of the enemy, get hit, hit back harder" are general themes. Was accused of cheating a few times because she runs a custom HUD mod that replaces all text with icons and all numbers with partially-filled bars; this was EVENTUALLY ruled to be assistive mode similar to colorblind mode and officially patched into the game, but she still receives online hate for it regularly(as she doesn't read and exclusively uses social media to post and look at pictures of puppies, she is able to ignore this, giving her the single healthiest relationship with social media possible for a streamer.)

Imp: Offensive flankers. She has a Sombra icon on most social media, has cosplayed as her, and many people call her a Sombra main, but Brian got the game because Aisha saw Tracer in the early advertisements and went "I want that". She does not consider it a win if her team wins. She considers it a win if the opposing team's Mercy or Widowmaker DCs, and will play any char that can accomplish that.

Skitter: Widowmaker, other snipers. Officially flex DPS, any time the Undersiders need someone to play an unusual hero in a new broken team comp, Taylor can pick them up quickly and well, but she's at her best clicking on heads and 180ing to take out Genjis and Sombras who thought no one had seen them coming up behind. Taylor is just very very good at noticing who's absent from the battle and knowing which route is easiest for them to take to get behind the team. Was laddering as Mercy/Ana with Emma's group of friends when she got scouted by Lisa. When solo-queueing she will literally play anyone to keep from getting bored.

Tattletale: Main support, heavily Ana. Shotcaller for the team, good at knowing who's high and who's low on health. Tends to tunnel vision on the fight and get taken out by flankers, but so good at keeping everyone else alive and getting her grenade onto key targets that it doesn't matter much. Lost a 1vs1 as Lucio to Taylor's Battle Mercy and sent her a friend request immediately.

Regent: Zenyatta, maybe Lucio if he's in a good mood or Brian asks nicely. Because:

The Heartbreakers are Canada's premier esports team, coached by former competitive Half-Life 1 player/asshole, Nikos Vasil. Several of his kids have shown up amongst its roster. People complain about nepotism, but the kids are actually mostly very good. Hijack and Cherish were standouts in the early days of Overwatch, with his Hanzo and her Genji working extremely well together, even if they hated everything about it. He eventually ran away and deleted all accounts, but his savings ran out and his attitude was not well-suited for a real job. So he went back to streaming with stolen wifi and his old gaming laptop. After all, if he didn't play Hanzo, no one would notice, right? Lisa spotted him in under a week and promised cash if he'd try out. His rule: No DPS. So now he's their secondary support, with a Zen that out-damages most Soldiers when he tries and at least keeps his healing orb out when he doesn't, and Alec shows up to competitions/conventions in a mask.

Other people:

Glory Girl is an obvious Pharah main, and Pancea learned to play by picking Mercy and jamming her staff directly up Pharah's butt. Amy ends up with more hours logged on AO3 than actual Overwatch despite eventually becoming extremely good as a support player/shotcaller(after leaving New Wave).

Cherish also leaves the Heartbreakers and gets picked up by Slaughterhouse, an extremely aggressive team coached by also-asshole Jacob Black(Jack / ). They peaked during dive comp. She continues to play Genji, and is still miserable.

Scion is Bobby Kotick.

[knightsheart-if]

oscar short story #1

He remembers the day they met so clearly. It was the day of the celebration of the Earth and the kingdoms of Vol and Fenia had reunited in pseudo peace. No fighting, no death, only a week of drinking and contests. It was his first time attending…well, as crown prince that is. Back when he lived on the streets of Irilem, Oscar lived for the moments where the streets would be set a light and flowers bloomed from the windows of every house in every neighbourhood. From the pretentiously rich mansions that loom over the docks to the broken down huts that lined the alley ways, never was a flower not seen. 

Even though he had lived poorly, he had never felt like an outsider then. He grew up away from the spotlight, unknowingly being a bastard for a major part of his life. In that time, people welcomed and embraced him as their own little troublemaker. He’s never had to worry about losing this feeling of community, until the king claimed him as his own. 

It’s…awkward, being surrounded by people who are either not from his kingdom or those who hadn’t even left Vol castle. There’s a…feeling of coldness, both in the sense that neither the soldiers of Vol or Fenia seem to like each other and that the location everyone was stationed at was numbingly cold. The morning frost stuck to his coat, with droplets slowly reaching the grass below. 

In retrospect, he really shouldn’t have stood under that tree for too long. 

He looked around, taking note of the differences between forces. The Vol soldiers wore chainmail and carried iron shields, while the Fenian Soldiers wore light fabric tunics with ranks differentiated by colour. Both kingdoms banners hung highly over their respective camps, their colours enchanted to stay so vibrant. Musicians had begun to prepare their songs, traders and artisans followed suit with their stalls while knights set up goal posts and games for everyone. 

It’s…somewhat overwhelming. He hid behind his father, his anxiety getting the best of him. His father looked down at him and laughed, his whole body shaking along with him. “You’re made of sturdier stuff Oscar. These guys can’t hurt you.” 

The king looked toward the main Fenian camp and smiled. Oscar had been told to not judge a book by its cover ever since he was young, but…the Fenian royals looked as cold as he’s been told they were. King Dacian’s eyes were cold, in sharp contrast to how he otherwise looked. Roughly waved red hair that shielded his face, his sharp cheekbones made him look like an experienced, if not terrifying, warrior king. 

So naturally, his son only shares his blue, stoic eyes. With short black hair that covers his ears and round cheeks that seem to pop out, he is the mere opposite looking of his father. Yet, they still shared that same detached look. They didn’t want to be here, that much was obvious. 

He shivered as they approached, crawling deeper into his father’s cape. The Fenian king took note and smirked. “Has your son inherited your cowardice, Revis?”

“Everyone would be afraid to look at you, Dacian.”

The two looked at each other intensely, before breaking down into laughter. Despite their two kingdoms constantly fighting, there wasn’t enough bad blood for the two kings to stop their friendship. Seeing them act in such a friendly way made Oscar wonder why they were even fighting in the first place. Maybe it’s an honour thing or something. 

“You should introduce yourself,” his father told him, nudging him towards the other prince. “I’d like for you to get along.” 

King Dacian does the same thing, guiding his son towards him. “It’ll do well to know the next king. Go on.” 

They both moved in sync, face to face. It's intimidating staring at the crown prince of Fenia, but he can’t help but admit that the prince is quite pretty. His eyes in particular were, as observed before, a stunning blue, but…there was something else to them. Something quite otherworldly. He couldn’t help but hesitate when introducing this himself after looking in such eyes.

“‘m…Oscar.” 

He gets stared at for a moment, even more so than before. It’s becoming overwhelming, very quickly. 

“Crown prince Oran of Fenia, blessed by the Mother, kissed by the ocean.”

Oscar remembered that Fenia, unlike Vol, has great reverence for the Gods of Hollas, with the Mother Goddess having a temple in their castle. Things are different in Vol; they have respect for their gods, but they don’t dedicate time to them. When he was living on the streets, he never saw someone pray before. Things changed when he entered the castle, where he met his sister. 

“By the way, you should also introduce yourself using your title, lest people take you for someone lesser.” 

He felt his anger flare at these words, but he respected his fathers words to get along. Even if he had to deal with the insults. “Sorry, hard to use a title I only got last week.” 

“It’s alright,” Oran said, the corner of his lips turning upright, “I can’t expect a tramp to teach their son manners after all.”

This isn’t the first time he’s heard his mother referred to as such. From the guards inside the castle to the maids gossiping in the kitchens, it’s nothing new. Heck, he’s even heard it from his eldest siblings! But he’s never had the power to do anything about them. As painful as it is to hear his mother, his beautiful mother who raised and protected him, being slandered, there was nothing he could do.

Until now. 

His fist left his side and slammed into Oran’s cheek. Oran fell over with a cry, body landing on soft, wet grass. Oscar looked over him, rage filling his eyes. Status be damned, no one would get away with mocking his mother and to an extent, him. 

“Shut up! Shut up…” He cried out, a lot of his energy evaporating from his body. “Say whatever you want about me, but leave her alone. Just leave her alone…”

He couldn’t bear the shame of the kings of Hollas looking at him so he ran, ran into the forest and away from the colourful celebrations and musical fiasco. The deep green carried him in and dragged him into the comforting flora and fauna until he reached a lake. He knelt by the water and looked at himself: red, puffy faced and bruised knuckles. It’s admittedly not a good look for a crown prince. 

The place he landed himself is quite beautiful. A clear pool of water surrounded by budding lilies and calm deer. Trees surrounded the meadow, shying it away from attention, but also complimenting its hidden beauty. His fingertips reached out and brushed against the refreshing touch of the water. 

“It’s nice here, innit?” 

A voice surprised him and he jumped, water splashing in his face. The voice laughed and a figure sat beside him, “Sorry ‘bout that. Didn’t mean to spook ya!”

It turned out to be a boy, around his age with bright, blonde, curly hair and his skin a healthy tan colour. Meanwhile, his eyes were…indescribable. In some lights, they were blue while in others, light pink. Maybe in truth, they were a mix of both. Either way, this boy made him nervous and got his anxiety playing up. He noticed and said, “I should probably introduce myself huh? I’m Coby! Kissed by the ocean!” 

Ah, he’s Fenian. He reached over to Oscar’s hand and gently touched it. A blast of calmness flowed through his body and he exhaled deeply. It felt…relaxing. Like being caressed gently all over by waves of water. Oscar looked at Coby and said, “Thank you, sir.” 

“You don’t have to call me that! We’re the same age, y’know? We should speak on the same terms!” Coby said, looking at Oscar with sparkles. Oscar smiled, feeling more at ease with someone who considers him a true equal, rather than one who looks down at him. This did make him curious about one thing however

“How did you do that?” Oscar asked. Coby hummed and slid off his boots, soaking his feet into the lake. He said, “Do you know what an empath is, Oscar?”

Oscar shaked his head. While magic is quite common in the farmlands and around the docks, it was nothing that involved influencing the mind or body. The most common would be summoning spells, used mostly for contacting demons to do odd jobs and the like. “I’ve heard of them, but I’ve never met one before you.”

“Well, then you’ll have heard that we can sense emotions! The stronger they are, the more they stand out to us. And like I did before, I can also influence emotions. Sorry about not asking you earlier.” 

Coby looked apologetic, his face looking quite like a puppy. Oscar is easy to forgive because he doesn’t want to lose a new friend when he just made one. Especially one that’s been able to calm his nerves easily. He said, “Nah, you helped me out. I can forgive that.” 

He got a beaming smile in response and it made him nervous, but happy. People around him hesitate to give him any attention, to give him any sort of positive reinforcement. Instead, he gets scolded, yelled at and chased away from a home that was promised to him. He hates it; he wishes he wasn’t a prince, he wishes he could stay as the little dock boy that he grew up as. But reality doesn’t care for what he wants, it doesn’t care about anything that isn’t happening. 

A silence roamed around as Oscar and Coby sat side by side, feet dangling in the water. It’s not an awkward atmosphere; rather, it’s comfortable enough that Oscar was happy enough to wait for Coby to say anything. And he did. “So, where are you from Oscar? If you feel comfortable answering.” 

“Irilem, the big dock city in Vol.” It’s not the biggest city in Vol, but it certainly has the advantage of the sea. Travellers from different continents arrive at the city, offering trading and other cultural exchanges. Nobles also come through that port to get to Vol castle, showing off to everyone who can see. Oscar used to visit the docks just to see them and watch as money and trinkets get stolen away from them. 

Coby’s eyes lit up and said with excitement in his voice, “You lived near the sea?! Oh wow! I live in the Cala islands! It’s not as exciting as Irilem, but we do practise pearl farming! Sometimes we go deep diving and we’re able to meet merfolk! I even saw Goddess Ceti one time! That’s how I got my mantle, y’know? Kissed by the ocean? Isn’t that cool?!”

Oscar’s awed, not just because his new friend met a goddess, but also that someone was so eager to talk to him so energetically. “Really?! Wow, I wish I could go there, but…”

“Huh? But you’re a prince! You can go anywhere!”

“But…aren’t both kingdoms fighting?”

Coby looked at him with confusion. Oscar looked back. 

“Didn’t you know? The kings have decided to end all fighting. We’re at peace now.”

[polar-bears-making-pancakes]

i think communication is a lot of practising and im really bad at it myself so idk how helpful this tip is but: other ppl are just like you, theyre scared and all have different emotional scars. but irl isnt like the internet and people will not hate and block you if you offend them for saying a wrong thing. and if they do and cant forgive you despite your good intentions then theyre not worth hanging around anyway. so the tip is to remember that people irl are forgiving and nuanced. they are adults, not children anymore who see things in black and white.

(side tangent: where im from its culturally the case that people do not ask others about themselves and its very inappropriate to point out obvious things, maybe its the same thing for you. its not rlly the case that germans are direct, its that if they say sth about a specific topic about themselves, its an indirect invitation for you to do the same thing, but you cant ask them directly, thats very rude. it could seem to some like the autistic dream but i swear its awful and i find it impossible to ask my german autistic friend anything personal (eg. i fear if i ask about her dog she's going to tell me that he died and i'll think i made her feel bad for mentioning it). im trying to unlearn it because not only is it culturally different in the uk, but its also impossible to make friends that way.) (((sorry if i slander germany again its a bit immoral but its how i tell myself im morally superior to my family who thinks i shouldnt live in the uk. )))

so my tip is: get a feel for what you can ask them about. listen to them and what they like, and then ask them about it. it will make them feel loved and appreciated. tell them what you want them to know because they will feel that you trust them and then they can do the same thing for you. its a way of showing them that you love them.

i love you and im asking you how your degree and thesis are going? you were saying that you struggled with it and i know you are very busy atm. i wish you good luck with it <3 you got this bro

hiiii thank you so much for this message and I'm sorry it took me so long to answer

that's the problem, i see consequences of my actions in very much black and white way. as I learnt from my counselor it's because of trauma. and I know I need to unlearn it because most people, as you said, are more forgiving than I am to myself and they are adults. but I still deep down fear that they are going to leave me like when my friends left when we were kids.

ooooh that's very interesting!! I get how you feel, I think, because I often blurt stuff out even without wanting to, that would be really rude, it seems, in that culture. I feel like polish people are really defensive and we are expected to be though. so it's like, if you'd point out someone's flaw, they would, on average, take it as an attack and attack you back. but also our way of shielding our insecurities is to bargain who has it worse. I feel like that's where the stereotype of main trait of polish people being complaining comes from. so I kind feel like I should stay in my lane and not get into people's lives as long as they don't invite me to. I don't want to overstep because I know that if I get involved I want to with my whole being. again, i dislike doing something halfway, it needs to be 1 or 0, black or white :/

thank you so much for the advice 🥹 I love you too

I'll try making myself ask questions, even if I feel like I'm not allowed to ask anyone for anything ever. nad I try get the feel to not ask questions that may make someone uncomfortable, another fear of mine

[waywardxrhea]

Part Thirty-Six: The Battle of Wakanda

[slow burn romance between Steve Rogers and SHIELD agent Emma Baker]

Warnings: 18+, contains humor, fluff, mental health, family trauma, romance, angst, language, violence.

installment list

Word count: 4.8k

The Battle of Wakanda commences.

The jet ride to the kingdom of Wakanda is virtually silent with no one talking because they're all trying to figure out what the hell to do about the upcoming fight. This is the biggest fight they've been in and half of the universe hangs in the balance so it's daunting to think about. Through her turbulent thoughts, Emma can tell Steve is worried too, but not just about the upcoming battle. She stops Steve from his pacing and asks him, "Hey Steve can you come sit with me for a minute?"

Steve nods and takes the seat beside Emma, asking, "Is everything all right?"

"That's just what I was about to ask you. What's wrong? Besides the obvious..."

"It's just..." Steve starts to say but stops. I'm just worried about Bucky, he thinks to himself, but he doesn't want to bring up the sore subject.

Emma looks into his eyes and can tell what he's thinking, so she asks, "You're worried about Bucky aren't you?"

Steve can't help the small smile that makes its way onto his lips at Emma mentioning Buck. This is the first time in a long time he's heard her say his name. The moment passes though and he sighs, lowering his voice and admitting to her, "I'm just afraid, Em. What if they couldn't fix him?"

Emma puts a hand on Steve's knee and squeezes it, saying, "Oh come on, this is Shuri we're talking about. She and the healers fixed my broken spine and I was none the wiser. I can almost guarantee they fixed Bucky and he's there waiting to see you. Everything is gonna work out just fine."

Steve nods and looks out the front end of the jet to see they were coming up quickly on Wakanda so he heads up to help direct Sam into the kingdom. He orders him to fly the jet into a patch of trees and Sam tells him, "I hope you're right, or else we're gonna land a lot quicker than you want to, Cap."

Emma stands to look out at the landscape and as she watches the trees approaching faster and faster, she grabs onto a railing to brace herself for impact. The impact doesn't come though as the jet sails right through the trees and into the kingdom of Wakanda.

Emma's mouth opens slightly in shock at the feat of engineering they just flew through and Steve can't help but chuckle a little bit, calling out to her, "And here I was thinking you'd been here before."

Emma laughs and rolls her eyes, defending herself with, "Well last time I didn't exactly know I was coming nor was I conscious to witness...that. And when we were leaving it wasn't like we flew out through the trees!"

"Time for bickering like an old married couple is up, you two," Natasha tells them as Sam lands the ship and opens the hatch in the back.

Steve replies, "Ha ha, very funny, Nat," before heading off the jet with her, leading the group.

Emma lags behind, gathering her stuff up slowly while her heart begins to pick up its pace at the thought of seeing Bucky again for the first time in years. She tries to stop the shaking in her hands and even out her breathing as she finally makes her way off the jet and into the sun. Looking around at Wakanda once again after all this time still instills a sense of wonder in Emma as she spins in a slow circle taking in the majesty of the kingdom.

Ahead, Steve and Nat along with King T'Challa head the group with Bruce butting in to inform T'Challa how big of an assault to expect. As Emma catches up, she hears T'Challa beginning to name off all of the groups he will have fighting and then points to someone emerging from the building.

"And a semi-stable 100-year-old man," Bucky says to the group as he smiles and gives Steve a hug.

"How've you been, Buck?" Steve asks with a big smile.

"Uh not too bad for the end of the world," he responds while taking a survey of the crowd Steve brought with him. His eyes land on Emma which makes her heart skip a beat as he says, "Now that one I don't think I've met."

Steve smiles and offers his hand out to Emma, saying to Bucky, "This is my girlfriend, Emma." He quickly kisses Emma's temple after he pulls her up to the front of the group.

Emma forces herself not to show the panic bubbling up inside due to seeing Bucky in person for the first time since DC. Steve can sense her anxiety and subtly rubs her back comfortingly to calm her down. The gesture helps a little bit, but Emma still can't help the panic inside. Over the years she had finally come to terms with what happened in her mind, but seeing Bucky in person was a whole different story. She hopes the fear from the past doesn't show on her face as she offers a small wave to him. She tries to think of words to say, but none make their way out of her mouth.

Bucky smiles at her, but looking into her eyes, something doesn't feel right. Suddenly, his mind is swept back to Washington DC. He sees himself hiding in the shadows of an apartment on orders from HYDRA to tie up loose ends. The girl he's waiting on has those same eyes... Her hair looks different now and she's a bit older, but Bucky could never forget the eyes of those he hurt as the Winter Soldier.

The group starts to make their way to Shuri's lab to fix up Vision and get the stone out of his head, but before Steve can head off with them, Bucky pulls him aside and whispers, "Steve. Emma...she looks so familiar. Please tell me that I'm not remembering right, that I didn't..."

Steve sighs and nods, telling him, "You did, Buck, but-"

Bucky shakes his head in shame and mumbles, "God I'm so sorry, Steve, I-"

"Buck," Steve says sternly, interrupting him. "It'll be okay. She knows it wasn't the real you, it's just hard for her sometimes. She's been through a lot and so have you, so when this is all over you two can sit down and talk things over. Build trust. It'll be a process, but I know you can do it. Emma's a very forgiving person."

"Well she's gotta be if she's put up with you all this time," Bucky replies, cracking a smile once more.

Steve chuckles and lightly punches Bucky in the arm, telling him, "It's really good to see you again, Buck. Now let's get this over with so we can all start that healing process. Together." After that sentiment, Steve heads off to the lab with the group heading in that direction.

When they arrive, Shuri is finishing setting up her equipment. She looks up to see them enter and smiles when she sees Emma. The young woman gets Vision set up on her lab table before quickly running over to Emma to give her a hug. "What happened to contacting me?" Shuri asks teasingly.

Emma smiles and admits, "We just didn't want to risk anything."

"Understandable," Shuri replies as she releases Emma from the embrace. She then turns back to the lab table to get started on Vision. As she walks to the table, she calls back to Emma, "Oh, by the way, I've created this really cool tech where you can remotely pilot ships from here. I'm sure we can get your AI programmed in quickly so you can pilot from here when the fight reaches us. You can protect us while I get this stone out. As long as it's okay with your Captain here."

Steve nods quickly, wanting Emma to stay as safe as possible. "That works for me," he tells Shuri.

Emma smiles and nods. "Sounds like I know my mission assignment."

With a look from Shuri, some of the lab techs nod and head over and gesture for Emma to follow them. They work quickly, getting SAM set up with the new system so it'll pilot just like she's used to. Although already programming rather quickly, they start to work faster as one of the members of the Dora Milaje informs everyone, "Something has entered the atmosphere."

Almost as if on cue, Sam's voice crackles over the coms, saying, "Hey Cap, we've got a situation."

This statement is followed by a crash and a rumble that shakes the lab. Emma looks out the window to see an alien craft on the ground with more incoming. She steadies herself and tries to stop the shaking in her hands as she types in the final line of code into her drone at the same time as the lab tech. As soon as they hit enter simultaneously, a command center similar to Fury's on the SHIELD helicarrier pops up around Emma.

The lab tech smiles and informs Emma, "This setup will give you command of all the kingdom's small fighter aircraft. Control it just like you would your AI and you'll be fine."

Emma's mouth sits slightly agape at the new setup and she thinks to herself, Man, I could get used to this... After a few seconds, the shock wears off and she manages to get out, "Gosh I love technology..."

As Emma is taking in the tech and memorizing the layout, Steve comes up behind her, putting his hand on her lower back to turn her towards him. "Hey, Wanda is going to stay here in order to keep an eye on Vision and to destroy the stone when Shuri gets it out. You're the lab's first line of defense. If these things breach, you fight like hell okay?" Steve then pauses, his eyes and voice going softer as he whispers, "I can't lose you."

Emma nods, the gravity of the situation starting to settle in. Tears prick the back of her eyes as she clears her throat and whispers, "I will."

Over the coms comes Sam's teasing voice, saying, "Oh don't go getting all weepy on us now."

Steve and Emma can't help the small smiles that make their way onto their faces at the comment. They both temporarily turn off their ends of the coms though to talk for a few more seconds. Emma clears her throat once more and manages to say, "Whatever happens out there, you better come back to me, okay?"

"I will," Steve promises and leans in to kiss her tenderly, hoping to God it wouldn't be the last time...

After their kiss, Emma pulls Steve into an embrace and whispers into his chest, "Be safe." They pull apart soon after, turn on their coms, and get back to work, knowing they can't delay the inevitable.

Wanda walks over to where Emma is with her setup and admits, "Never in a million years did I think I would be in a situation like this..."

Emma looks up and nods, saying, "Neither did I. But we're here now and we need to fight. Not just for our own lives and those we love, but for trillions of other innocent lives across the universe." She pauses for a second before jokingly asking, "No pressure or anything right?"

Wanda forces a small laugh in response but she can't help but look back over to the table where Vision lay with Shuri working on him, worried. She sighs and whispers, "I hope this works..."

"It will," Emma tells her sternly. "We just need to buy some time and keep those things at bay. I'll do everything in my power to make sure they don't get to Vision."

"Thank you, Emma," Wanda whispers before pulling her into an embrace.

"Thank me later when this is all over, okay?" Emma asks with a smile at her friend.

As Wanda walks back to the table, Emma sends out SAM herself to take a fly around in stealth mode to see what the army has in store. As she looks around, she sees tons of hellish-looking doglike creatures running towards the protective shield that blocks the kingdom from intruders. "What the hell are those..." she whispers at the sight.

"What do you see?" Wanda asks.

"You don't even wanna know," Emma mumbles as she starts tapping away at the command screens in front of her, preparing the small aircraft for a firefight.

Suddenly, Steve's voice comes over the coms, saying, "Emma. They know where Vision is. Line up everything you've got to protect the lab."

"Already on it," Emma replies as she finalizes her keystrokes. She sends out five fighter craft to hover in front of the lab with instructions to shoot any of the alien invaders on sight. After she does this, she sees some stragglers begin to leave the main herd and begin running toward the lab. She instantly sends two more crafts to off the stragglers so they don't get to their location. As more and more get the idea to head off from the pack, she taps her coms and informs everyone, "Hey guys, I'm not sure how many of these things I can handle on my own even with these ships..."

In response to this, T'Challa gives the command to open the barrier and let the creatures in to keep them away from the lab. At his command, the shield is opened and hundreds if not thousands of the hellish aliens flood onto the battlefield. Quickly, Emma says aloud to the AI, "Send out the remaining ships in instant kill mode with no friendly fire. Let's see what these aliens got."

A little while of tense battle goes by with Emma constantly monitoring everything anxiously. All starts to seem too overwhelming for the warriors on the battlefield when suddenly a huge beam of light rains down from the sky. Emma uses SAM to figure out what it was and as it turns out, the beam of light in question contains the one and only Thor Odinson! Before Thor is seen though, his new mighty weapon reveals itself and takes out a lot of the creatures attacking the other Avengers on the field.

"Yes!" Emma shouts in excitement and relief.

On the battlefield, Bruce starts laughing and shouts to the aliens, "Ha! You guys are so screwed now!"

The battle rages on and things seem to be on the up and up but then there's a deep rumbling in the ground below that shakes the lab. Wanda and Emma send each other a look before running to look out the window to see the ground exploding with huge circular saws that instantly destroy everything in their path. "I need to go out there," Wanda tells Emma urgently.

"Wanda, no, you need to stay here and destroy the stone when Shuri gets it out," Emma tells her.

"But if I don't go out there and stop these things, they'll get into the lab. I'm going. I trust you to hold them off from here, please trust in me to hold them off out there."

Emma hesitates for a second before finally responding with, "Fine, go. I'll protect Vision."

"And I'll protect Steve," she replies.

Emma nods and tells her retreating back, "Be safe, be smart, Wanda." Wanda nods before sprinting from the lab.

Emma then turns to Shuri and says, "Guess it's just you and me."

"And that is all we will need," Shuri replies with a smile as she continues her work.

During this distraction though, Emma's monitoring was left untouched and SAM suddenly alerts her of an alien about to breach the lab. "Damnit," Emma whispers as she tries to catch up to the alien with the outside crafts, but it's too quick. "I guess it's you and me now SAM."

Emma quickly gets SAM back to the lab building and puts her into stealth mode as she searches the halls for the intruder. When she locates him, Emma orders SAM to shoot him with a powerful blaster in the back. The large alien takes a swing at where he sees the blasts coming from, but the blow only makes the drone more powerful. "Oh, you're gonna regret that," Emma says as she sends the drone flying at the alien at full speed to blast his blow back at him.

Not realizing what had happened, the creature takes another swing at the drone to which Emma mumbles to herself, "Wow, you'd think they would learn from their mistakes." She deals another blow to the alien, but while she is reorienting herself, the creature takes the opportunity to evade her.

Suddenly, the door to the lab bursts open to reveal the alien Emma had been fighting moments before in the hall. While waiting for SAM to come and deal with him, Emma takes her pistol off of her thigh holster and begins shooting at him. She knows the bullets won't do too much damage, but any attention on Emma is attention that isn't on Shuri and Vision.

Without even being phased by the bullets from Emma's gun, the alien runs at the Dora Milaje warrior that had been assigned as their security detail. As the warrior and alien fight, Shuri begins to work faster on getting the stone from Vision's head. When the warrior is overpowered, the creature turns its attention to Shuri who desperately begins to shoot her own gauntlets at him to keep him away from Vision.

The alien manages to knock both women off the balcony before rounding on Emma once more. He takes a swing at her, but Emma expertly tucks and rolls away from the swing. She isn't fast enough in getting up though because the next thing Emma knows, she's being picked up and thrown at the wall like a ragdoll.

After a few seconds of seeing stars, Emma pulls herself off the floor, ignoring the overwhelming pain in her body. She thinks of Steve and what he would do at this moment, which snaps her into focus. She needs to fight. She needs to fight harder than she ever has before. "Not today..." Emma mutters as she spits out some blood from her mouth and assumes a fighting stance.

The fight never comes though. Instead, Vision manages to get himself off of the table and throws himself at the creature that was about to deal another terrible blow to Emma. When he does this, the two fall out the window and onto the battlefield below.

Over the coms, Sam makes the announcement, "We have a Vision situation!"

"Someone get to Vision!" Steve shouts.

"I'm making my way down, but it might take a minute, that alien got me pretty bad," Emma replies in a strained voice as she runs down the stairs trying to ignore the excruciating pain in her ankle, back, shoulder, and head.

"I've got him, I can get there quicker," Bruce tells them as he begins making his way to the area where Vision is fighting the alien.

When Emma finally gets out of the lab, she sprints into the clearing, not seeing Bruce anywhere in sight but witnessing as the alien stabs Vision with his spear. "Shit..." Emma whispers and closes her eyes momentarily.

Steve's voice then enters her ear, asking, "Vision what's your status?" When there isn't a response, he asks, "Banner? Emma?"

"Vision's down," Emma breathes as the alien turns to make eye contact with her once more with a sick grin on his face. Emma balls her hands into fists and continues with, "I'm not sure how much longer I can last one-on-one with this guy..."

"Good thing you won't have to," Steve shouts as he sprints into the area and attacks the creature. Through his fight, he calls out to Emma, "Get to Vision and get him outta here!"

As she gets to Vision and begins to help him stand, the creature throws Steve off of himself and begins to strangle him. Rage and fear fill Emma's body and she looks around for something to save Steve with and spots the alien's spear. She quickly grabs the weapon and runs at the creature, driving the spear into its back along its spinal column, killing him instantly. Emma uses all of her strength to throw the alien off of Steve before dropping to her knees beside him and whispering, "I told you to be safe."

Steve chuckles the slightest bit and replies, "I know, I know." Emma helps Steve stand and they both make their way over to where Vision is on the ground, barely functioning. They help him to sit up against a branch and Wanda flies into the area, running to be by his side.

Steve and Emma give the two space and as they walk off a few feet, Emma whispers, "I'm sorry," not able to look at Steve.

"What for?"

"He got into the lab...I was supposed to prevent that," Emma replies.

"You did the best you could," Steve tells her.

Emma is about to go on, but she is cut off by a piercing noise that cuts through the air like a knife. All Emma has to hear is Vision say, "He's here," and she knows that the fight is far from over.

The fighting on the battlefield seems to stop at Vision's words, so while everyone isn't occupied, Steve makes the announcement, "Everyone on my location, we have incoming." As the other warriors make their way to the area, Emma calls SAM to her position and activates the bracelets on her wrists to triple the energy in her punches.

Nearby, a cloud of blue smoke materializes and from it emerges the big man himself, the Mad Titan, Thanos. He dons a golden gauntlet on one hand adorned with colorful stones, the Infinity Stones. Only one is missing and it's the one attached to Vision's head.

Making his way back from his earlier fight, Bruce whispers to Steve, "That's him..."

Steve engages his Wakandan-issued shields and tells everyone, "Eyes up. Stay sharp."

Bruce runs at the man in his Hulk-Buster armor first, but he simply phases through his body as Thanos uses one of the stones to render the attack obsolete. To ensure that Bruce stays out of the fight, Thanos only unphases him when he's stuck in a wall of rock, unable to move any further.

Steve runs at him but is tossed away by purple wisps of energy from the Power Stone. T'Challa is the next to make an attempt, but he is punched to the ground and the energy in his suit is dispelled into the earth below. After that, Sam tries to fly in for an aerial attack but is flicked from the sky like a bug.

Emma reaches for her second pistol and begins shooting at Thanos from one side as SAM blasts him from the other in a feeble attempt to weaken him. The Titan makes eye contact with Emma and says menacingly, "You. You puny Earth girl managed to kill Glaive..." He smirks before saying, "I'm going to enjoy crushing you."

As he flicks the other Avengers off like flies, he makes his way towards Emma who continues to blast at him with SAM. Within a few seconds, Thanos reaches Emma and just like plucking a flower from the soil, he reaches out and grabs to hold her up by her throat. He tightens his grip just a bit as she punches him with a surprising amount of power, but it's nothing compared to his own or even her other friends on the battlefield. He knows how easily he could kill her right now, but doesn't because he wants to make her feel like she has a chance. He wants to see her struggle for her life. She deserves to be punished for what she did. Her friends deserve to watch her die.

After a few seconds, Emma's power starts to weaken as her body begins to lose oxygen. Loudly, SAM begins to shout, "Boss! Boss! Vital signs are starting to fade, you have to fight!"

A few yards away, Steve shakes off the blow of the Power Stone and looks up to see where Thanos was now. What he sees is the Titan with his hand around Emma's throat and her body beginning to go limp. At the sight, Steve feels hot rage welling up in his chest. He doesn't even think, his body just jumps into action to save Emma. Steve sprints over and knocks Thanos's legs out from under him and this makes him drop Emma. As Emma hits the ground, she's dragged away from the immediate area. She doesn't know by whom though because all she's worried about is getting oxygen back into her lungs after what just happened.

Back in the fight, Steve punches Thanos in the jaw and then shocks the Titan by having the strength to hold back his hand that wears the gauntlet. Steve knows he can't let him win. He bares his teeth as he uses his full strength to try and get an advantage, his mind racing through all of his memories with Emma, with Sam, with Bucky, and this gives him the strength to keep holding on. All of this effort is for naught though as Thanos takes a swing at Steve with his other hand and this time he stays down.

Recovering a bit from the lack of oxygen, Emma finally gains the strength to lift her head up only to see Wanda having to use her powers to blast the stone out of Vision's head while still fighting Thanos off. A huge blast of yellow energy erupts as the deed is complete and the stone is destroyed. Mixed feelings of hope and sadness fill Emma's mind as she takes in the scene. 

A few seconds pass and Emma tries to stand, but is pulled back to the ground by a force that isn't her own free will. The same yellow blast from before fills the air as she is tossed back to the ground as time turns itself back. Emma looks up at the scene once more only to see the madman rip the stone out of Vision's head himself. As he does this, Vision loses all color in his body in an instant and falls to the ground.

"Oh my God..." Emma whispers as she watches helplessly as Thanos fashions the last stone onto the gauntlet. The power courses through his body and even he screams at the pain they cause him.

Emma can't watch the rest as Thor comes in to fight the man because she's too busy crying and cursing herself for not doing a better job. After a few moments, she dares to take a look up at the battlefield littered with her friends just in time to see Thanos snap his fingers before falling back into a portal of his creation.

Steve finally picks himself up from the ground and looks around, asking Thor, "Where'd he go?" Steve is met with silence though, so he asks again, "Thor. Where'd he go?"

After that is when Thanos's desire comes to fruition. From beside Steve, Bucky stands up and says with concern in his voice, "Steve..." before fading to dust, leaving his gun to drop to the ground. Steve drops to his knees beside where his friend stood just moments before and his heart breaks. He lost Buck yet again... Panic starts to fill his body as he looks around for Emma and to see who else will fall victim to the snap.

Meanwhile, Emma gets the energy to lift her head and scan the field. She makes eye contact with Sam and feels shame rise in her body as she watches him turn into dust as well. "I'm so sorry..." Emma whispers as he fades from existence.

Finally, Steve spots Emma on the ground and runs over to her. He pulls her onto his lap and cradles her in his arms praying she won't be next. Emma looks up to Steve with tears flowing from her eyes and she manages to get out, "Steve, I'm scared."

Steve holds her tighter and kisses her forehead before mumbling, "It's okay. I'm right here." Fear of losing Emma makes its way into Steve's thoughts as more of their friends fade to dust around them. Having this in mind, Steve adds to his thought, "I love you, Emma."

Emma's mouth opens slightly in shock at those three little words coming from Steve, but she shakes off the shock and quickly says back to him what she's been wanting to say for so long, "I love you too, Steve." At the words, Steve holds Emma closer knowing that these could very well be their last moments together.

a/n: yes of course I'm leaving this one on a cliffhanger! what kind of writer do you think i am? what a ride though! we finally get an "I love you" but at what cost?

next chapter

taglist: @mrsevans90

[bestofbucky]

Eavesdrop

Pairings: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 5.1k

Warnings: none really, enemies to ?

A/N: This is my first time posting something I have written. I hope you enjoy it! Thank you so much @tuiccim for your help, couldn’t have done it without you.

Being an Avenger is tough. Of course, there are the obvious missions and kicking ass that are exhausting, especially because you don’t have any sort of enhancements or powers. You are just a regular human being, fighting with and against some not so regular human beings. Naturally when you have downtime, you spend it doing things with the least amount of effort. Watching Netflix, listening to music, taking baths, etc, meaning that your social life outside of the compound was, to put it simply, non-existent.

You had just returned from the worst date of your life, well, one of the top five worst dates of your life. Over the past couple of months Steve and Natasha had grown tired of you whining about being single but not making any effort to change it and began sending you on blind dates. Somehow, they managed five different times to find five completely awful people. This time they had set you up with Arthur, a recruit for SHIELD and a good one at that. You wouldn’t be surprised to see him on the elite squad soon, but when it came to your date, he was really blunt and inappropriate, and you had cringed your way through the entire thing.

Once you got back to the compound, you first went to your room to get changed into gym clothes for training with Nat, then headed to her room. On your way you passed one of the common rooms and heard two voices. One familiar but one you didn’t recognise, you decided to check it out and found Steve and another man.

Steve called your name inviting you over to them as they both stood up. ‘This is Bucky. He’s moving in today to begin training.’ Steve explains. You nod and smile at Bucky, remembering Steve told you about him and that he would be living here and eventually joining the team.

You have to stop yourself from gasping out loud at the sight of him. He is a 6 ft something hunk of muscle and beauty and you can’t stop yourself from trying to take him all in with your eyes.

Steve then introduces you to Bucky who looks in your eyes for all of two seconds to say, ‘hi’ before looking down at his feet. He is probably really nervous. Even from that two second glance, you could tell he had one hell of a past. They had you hooked already, you wanted to stare into those eyes and let them tell you the stories of the lifetime they had seen.

‘You were just in Wakanda right? How was it? I have only ever seen it in pictures but I really want to go.’ You let your excitement show, hoping to relax him a bit.

‘Yeah, it was nice. I was frozen for most of it though’ Shit, he curses himself. He didn’t mean to come across so rude but he was really nervous, you are really pretty and it is messing with his head a little. It doesn’t help that he has had to meet a lot of different people today and he is all socialised out. He sees your face fall slightly before you quickly compose yourself, any normal person would have missed it but he has his past of being a trained assassin.

‘Well, Nat is probably waiting for me, she told me she would show me some new moves today.’ You say realising that Bucky had probably been under a lot of stress lately and most likely just wanted to be alone, or with Steve rather than chatting to you, a stranger. At least you hoped this was the reason and it wasn’t that he already disliked you. Saying goodbye to the two of them you head off to Natasha’s room.

Not even bothering to knock, you walk into her room leaving the door open behind you, since you’ll be heading down to the gym soon anyway. Natasha is sitting on the end of the bed braiding her hair. ‘You almost ready?’ You ask.

‘Yeah, just got to finish my hair then put my shoes on.’ She tells you so you take a seat on her bed while you wait.

Meanwhile, Bucky told Steve that he wanted to go get his room sorted. Really it was just an excuse to be alone for a little while. On the way there he walked past a room with the door open and heard two voices talking, recognising them to be you and Natasha. He was just about to carry on walking to his room when he heard Natasha ask, ‘did you meet him yet?’

Bucky assumed she was talking about him and wanted to hear what you had to say. He hoped you would be understanding of his reticence after his taxing morning. 

‘Yeah, I met him today.’ You sigh and roll your eyes.

‘That bad?’ Nat asks, raising her eyebrows with a slight smirk on her face.

‘Yes, I tried to be as friendly as I could but he seemed like a jerk.’ You huff.

‘How so?’

‘He was so blunt he just came across really rude. I had high expectations, especially after hearing Steve say so many nice things about him.’

‘Maybe he was just having a bad day?’ She attempts a defence. 

‘Bad day or not, he should have the courtesy to smile and be polite even if it is fake.’

Bucky was so hurt to hear this. Yes, he wasn’t the nicest to you but your reaction seemed a bit dramatic. He didn’t want to hear you say any more so he rushed off to his room.

‘So, I guess you aren’t going to go on a second date with him then?’ Nat asks.

‘No, I really appreciate you and Steve trying to set me up but seeing as this is the 5th time and none of them were any good, I think I’ll go back to my old methods.’ You smile at her.

‘What, never putting yourself out there and waiting for the right person to just fall into your lap?’ Nat teases and you both laugh when you nod. She finishes tying her shoelaces and you head off to the gym.

The next day you were leading a meeting of recruits who have the potential to be moved up into the squad that worked with the Avengers. The elite squad. Unfortunately for you, Arthur was in the group of recruits and was probably the next one to be promoted.  You finally dismissed everyone and started getting your stuff together to leave as well when Arthur came up to you.

‘What’s the word on who is moving up next, dove?’ You look up in shock, surely, he didn’t just call you dove.

‘Excuse me?’ You look him dead in the eye.

‘I said what’s the word on who is moving up next? I think you might need to get your hearing checked.’ He laughs at his own joke so you fake laugh with him.

‘That’s confidential., we’ll let everyone know when we have made the decision.’ You say and go to walk past him but he grabs your arm.

‘Does someone need a little convincing. If it’s you, then I can think of some ways.’ He whispers seductively in your ear. You pull your arm out of his grasp and frown at him.

‘I’m only joking, dove, come on, you can’t even take a joke?’ He laughs again.

You put on your best fake smile and your customer service voice. ‘There will be no convincing necessary. You are a good agent but you also have good competition. We will inform you all of our decision when it is made.’ You say and quickly turn and walk out the door before he can say anything else. When you get into the lift you ask FRIDAY where Steve is.

‘Common room A, Agent Y/L/N’. You make your way there as quick as possible. Heading around the corner, you slam into a solid object. You hiss at the contact on your fresh bruises, a frown appearing on your face. As soon as you look up to see what or who you bumped into, the frown quickly fades into a smile when you see its Bucky. He is already looking at you.

‘Sorry I should have been watching where I was going.’ He mumbles quickly.

‘No, it’s just as much my fault as yours. I shouldn’t have been in such a hurry.’ You apologise to him. As much as you would love to stay and chat  with  Bucky, you need to get to Steve to explain what just happened with Arthur and hopefully you can get him kicked off the team.

Bucky had left his room to try and find someone to help him figure out a few things with FRIDAY but as soon as he bumped into you that completely left his mind. You were all that filled his mind ever since he met you. He stood in the hallway for a while before realising he should ask you to help. Maybe this would be a good excuse to make up for his poor first impression. He heads in the direction you went but stops short when he hears your voice.

‘I think he bruised me. The dick.’ You say and Steve frowns at you ‘Come on, Steve. I’m  allowed to be angry. He has been nothing but a jerk to me,’ you explain and shift to get more comfortable.

‘What did you say to him when he did this?’ Steve asks, holding your arm and examining the newly formed bruises in the shapes of fingers.

‘I put on my best fake smile and pretended like everything was ok,’  You joke and Steve laughs, ‘as much as I hate the guy, I don’t have the confidence to actually show it.’ You sigh and Steve pulls your sleeve back down and leans back into the sofa. ‘Is there any way we can kick him off the team?’ You exaggerate batting your eyelashes at him.

‘He isn’t even on the team yet and you already want to kick him off?’ Steve questions.

‘Yes! I really don’t like him. I know he is your friend but I trust him about as far as I can throw him’ You explain and Steve nods.

Bucky had heard enough. He can’t believe you could be so horrible. You had the sweetest exterior and, from first impressions, you didn’t look like you could hurt a fly. But as he heard you say, you clearly put on a fake act to come across as polite and kind when really you are rude deep down. He didn’t mean to eavesdrop on you. Twice now. But he is so glad he did, because now he knows not to waste his energy on you. He knows what you think of him and he has formed his opinion of you. He hurries back to his room.

‘He’s not my friend Y/N, I only said that to you to make you go on the date with an open mind. I’ve only ever had one conversation with the guy,’ Steve jokes and you playfully push his arm, ‘All jokes aside, his behaviour breaks a lot of conduct rules and is a good enough reason to have him knocked down a few squads.’ Steve replies and you sigh with relief. You hug Steve and thank him for his help, he’s taken slightly off guard but hugs you back before you go your separate ways.

 A few weeks later, you walk into the kitchen to find the whole team eating their breakfast. Sam is cooking and when he sees you, he makes a plate and hands it to you.

‘Thank you Sam.’ You hug him and take the plate, turning around at the sound of Bucky’s scoff. You haven’t had a conversation with Bucky since you bumped into each other in the hallway. You had tried to but he either completely ignored you or just rolled his eyes and left the room.

At first it hurt, you wondered if you had done something wrong. The team seemed just as confused by it as you. Bucky didn’t have a problem with anyone else. That wasn’t to say he was extremely friendly with them, he wasn’t there yet and nobody blamed him but he could hold conversation with the others. He even laughed at their jokes. You were starting to get fed up with it so after breakfast you headed to Bucky’s room to talk to him. You knocked on the door and it wasn’t long until he answered it. As soon as he saw you his face fell visibly.

‘Can we talk?’ You asked hoping he would let you into his room. He paused to consider it then stepped out of his room, closing the door behind him. He stood there with his arms crossed and waited for you to talk.

‘Is there something I did wrong?’ You ask him and he keeps a blank face.

‘Why do you care?’ He asks still arms crossed over his body.

‘I care because you are always scoffing or rolling your eyes at me whenever I try to talk to you.’

‘I’m not scoffing or rolling my eyes now.’ He points out.

‘No but you’re not exactly being very friendly.’

‘Would you prefer for me to fake it then? Just put on a smile and pretend to like you?’ He jabs. You take a moment to process what he just said. You didn’t realise he could be so mean.

‘No Bucky I would prefer for you to maybe make an effort to get to know me before making a judgement.’ You scowl at him.

‘I have a perfectly fine judgement of you. I am not going to fall for your fake smiles and fake friendships.’ Bucky snarls and walks back into his room closing his door in your face. You are left to stand there in shock.

On the other side of the door Bucky is leaning there conflicted. The shock on your face looked so genuine. No, he has to remember it is all an act with you.

From that day on you decided you weren’t going to make an effort with him. It wasn’t the most mature decision but you were tired. What used to be eye rolls and scoffs, now turned into snarky comments and you were no longer afraid to throw them right back at him.

Steve had tried a few times to talk to you about it but, when he couldn’t tell you why Bucky hated you, he realised there was nothing he could do to change how either of you felt about the other. What he could do was change up your schedules so the two of you were rarely ever in the same room together.

Unfortunately, instead of the arguments happening quite calmly but consistently over the course of the whole day. They were now much shorter, confined to just mealtimes, and much more heated and intense. None of the team knew which was worse.

You were sparring in the gym with Natasha trying to work off some steam from this morning’s argument with Bucky.

‘Your moves are sloppy, get whatever is making you emotional out of your head.’ She grunts at you but this only forces you further into your head.

You go hard at her, but she blocks every move so you go to defence. She smirks at you, ‘Has a certain super soldier got into your head?’

That causes a surge of anger to hit you and again you go hard at Natasha, but your anger only allows her to catch you off balance and you are pinned to the mat in a matter of seconds.

‘So it is Barnes.’ She  pulls you up and you brush yourself off before getting back into a fighting stance.

‘I don’t want to talk about it.’ You grunt at her and start your attack. Your moves are still predictable and anger clouds your mind. You feel yourself getting more and more worked up with every hit she blocks.

You retreat to take a breather, you hear the door open and you glance over, the man of the hour has just entered and you roll your eyes but continue to spar with Natasha.

Out the corner of your eye, you see him make his way over to you both, watching as you take a lot of hits from her and barely manage to land any of your own.

‘I have seen toddlers fight better than you Y/N.’ You hear him chuckle.

‘I don’t need your opinion.’ You grunt, still trying to keep your focus on Natasha.

‘Fight like that on the field and you’ll be dead in two seconds.’

‘Keep talking and you’ll wish you were dead.’

He laughs ‘Is that a threat?’ You ignore him and continue sparring. ‘Your punches are so weak, how did you become an Avenger again?’ He is still smiling knowing exactly which buttons to push.

You stop and make your way over to him. ‘I became an Avenger because of my talent and my strength, that I worked hard to earn.’ You are right up in his face, almost chest to chest. You are breathing hard, partly from the exercise but mostly because of how riled up you are. You notice he is breathing hard as well, his breath fanning across your face.

Your mind can’t help but drift, is this what he would look like in bed, his chest rising and falling faster than normal. Small beads of sweat gathered at his hairline from his recent run. You suddenly realise how close the two of you are and force the inappropriate thoughts from your mind. You hate how seeing him so riled up is actually a huge turn on. How could you let yourself be attracted to such an asshole?

‘You wouldn’t stand a chance against me.’ His voice drops so low that in a different circumstance you would have happily dropped your panties.

‘You’re right. I wouldn’t stand a chance against you and your metal arm that you were given. Or you and the super soldier serum that you were given.’ You know they are cheap shots but you just couldn’t help how absolutely fuming he makes you. He had managed to get under your skin and the thought of him being successful only made you angrier.

He leans down even more, your noses almost touching ‘I don’t know how everyone else can’t see through your little nice act. You pretend to be so kind on the outside but deep down you’re a bitch.’ Ouch. You deserved that one for what you said to him but it didn’t make it hurt any less. Especially because if you were hooked up to a lie detector and asked to say those things again, it would flash up as a blatant lie. However, looking into his eyes there was not an ounce of regret for what he said.

Bucky knew he shouldn’t have said what he did, but you had hit a nerve and it was the only thing he could think to say back. He saw the hurt flash across your eyes but it was too late to take it back now. The only thing he could do was exit the situation before it got any worse. He turned on his heels and left the room, leaving you standing there in complete shock at your exchange. 

Natasha calls your name but you quickly leave for your room before anyone can see you like this.

The team was split all across the base. This wasn’t how you would usually handle missions but as soon as you arrived the mission started to go sideways.

‘Target headed towards the west elevator. Anyone nearby copy?’ You hear Steve’s voice through comms.

‘I'm on it.’ You say back, your comms crackling more than usual.

‘Copy that.’ Bucky said, his comms crackling from the two of you talking at the same time.

The rest of the team had heard both of your voices but neither of you had heard the other. So it was a big shock when you were waiting for the elevator and you heard his voice behind you.

‘You have got to be kidding me.’ He sighs and slowly walks up to you to wait for the elevator as well. ‘Did you not hear me say I got it?’ He snaps at you.

‘No because I was the one that said I’m on it.’ You snap back and thankfully the elevator dings it’s arrival. Normally in creepy Hydra bases you would avoid elevators but seeing as there was no stairwell nearby, this was the only option.

‘Age before beauty.’ You say to him, gesturing to the elevator.

‘Very funny’ he says sarcastically before stepping inside. You follow after him and press the only floor button available.

Silence permeates the small space as you prepare for what’s to happen once the doors open. Instead, the elevator jerks to a stop.

‘No.’ You panic and start pressing the floor button over and over. ‘No no no no no.’ Nothing is working.

‘Let me try.’ Bucky says pushing you out of the way, you so badly want to say something but the only thing you can focus on is the fact you might be trapped. Bucky taps the button and looks around for anything else to press but there is nothing. You can feel yourself start to get light headed as claustrophobia takes hold and the thought of falling to your death in this metal box takes over your thoughts. You shrink down onto the floor and hold your head in your hands.

‘Do you always have to be so dramatic?’ Bucky huffs. You don’t answer him, the only thing you can think about is the pain starting in your chest and your breathing getting heavier. 

‘Stop breathing so fast. You are going to make yourself pass out.’ Bucky grunts but when you don’t reply or make any effort to slow your breathing he gets worried. He kneels down in front of you ‘Hey? Doll? Can you hear me?’ You can’t answer him, you just feel the impending doom and the immense pressure on your chest. ‘I’m going to move your hands.’ He announces then you feel him take your hands and pull them away from your face. You look at him, tears in your eyes, a look of pure fear across your face. ‘Breathe with me, doll. Can you do that?’ He asks and you manage to nod. He speeds his breathing up to your pace then gradually slows it, you follow him as best as you can and eventually you get your breathing back to normal, with the occasional hiccup or sharp intake.

Once he sees you are ok, he lets go of your hands and sits on the floor as far away as he can. You both continue to sit in silence.

‘Thank you.’ You eventually manage to whisper, he nods without meeting your eye.

You can’t help but feel disappointed, you just got to see a caring side of Bucky and it felt amazing to be on the receiving end of it, but now you are back to him not giving a shit about you. You go back and forth wondering whether it is the right time to bring up the issues between you two. If not now, when?

‘Why do you hate me so much?’ He looks across at you and sighs before he answers.

‘I don’t hate you.’

‘Yes you do. It seems like you go out of your way to make me miserable.’ You push, making him lean his head back on the wall behind him.

‘I don’t hate you. I just don’t like how you formed opinions about me so early on. You wanted me off the team before I even got cleared to be on the team.’ Bucky explains. You stare at him in confusion.

‘How do you know what opinions I formed of you? I may have wanted you off the team but it was only because you were mean and that was after you were cleared.’ You could feel yourself starting to get angry.

‘Then how come I overheard you talking about the first time we met to Nat, you said I was blunt and rude. Then after I accidentally bumped into you, you told Steve you wanted me off the team.’ Bucky says agitatedly.

‘I never-‘ you think back to any conversations you had with Nat and Steve about Bucky. The only ones that came to mind were asking them if they knew why Bucky didn’t like you. Then it hits you, he had overheard you talking to Steve and Nat about Arthur. You sighed.

‘Let me guess, you overheard me and Nat talking not long after we first met. We were in Nat’s room getting ready to go train?’ You ask and he nods.

‘Then the conversation you overheard with Steve was straight after we bumped into each other. We were in the common room?’ Bucky looks confused but nods again.

‘You are such a prick. You eavesdrop but don’t even listen long enough to hear who we were talking about.’ You can’t help but chuckle at the situation, even though it’s not particularly funny.

‘What?’ Bucky looks more confused than ever.

‘Well, if you had listened properly to the whole conversation you would know I was talking about that asshat agent, Arthur.’ That came out more blunt than you intended.

‘The recruit that got bumped down a few squads even though he is really good?’

‘Yep. That’s the one’

‘I don’t understand.’

‘Before you came Steve and Nat had been setting me up on blind dates with people. Arthur was the fifth one, I really didn’t want to go so Steve convinced me by saying they were friends and all this nice stuff about him.’ You pause to take a deep breath. ‘The day we met, I had just come from the date with him and it was awful. That's what me and Nat were talking about. Then when we bumped into each other in the hallway, I had just come from a meeting with the recruits. Arthur had been inappropriate and he hurt my arm, I was rushing to Steve to tell him and ask if he can be kicked off the team.’ You finally manage to say and Bucky just looks at you. You can see the cogs turning in his head as he is finally getting context to the snippets of conversation he overheard.

‘Shit. I am so sorry. I am such an idiot.’ He scolds himself and you can’t help but feel bad for him.

‘I am not going to disagree with you, but we have both said and done some pretty nasty stuff. I am sorry for any hurt I caused you.’  You say sincerely and he looks over to you and smiles.

‘So you didn’t think I was rude when we first met?’ He still holds your eye contact and you take a moment to look at him. You have never seen him look so vulnerable before, he almost looked scared.

‘No, Bucky, I thought you were probably nervous or tired from meeting loads of new people.’ You explain and his shoulders fall.

‘I feel like such a jerk.’ He sighs and you scoot yourself closer to him so he has to look at you.

‘I’m not all that innocent in this either. It was a misunderstanding. I am just glad we have cleared it up now.’ You say meaning it and he smiles earnestly back at you. It is something you have never experienced first-hand. You have seen him give those gorgeous, slightly lopsided, smiles to other people but seeing one directed at you causes a rush of heat to your cheeks and you find yourself blushing.

Bucky must have been thinking along the same lines ‘You’re cute when you blush. I have never seen this side of you before.’ He brushes some hair out of your face and behind your ear. ‘You know, part of the reason I was so nervous when I first met you was because I was taken off guard by how beautiful you are.’ His cheeks flush slightly at his confession.

Before you can say anything the elevator jerks again and starts moving, you and Bucky are quick on your feet, preparing yourself for the doors to open.

When they finally do you are met with a group of Hydra agents ready to attack. You and Bucky work in tandem, playing off each other’s strengths. When the Hydra agents realize this, they work to separate you. The majority of them are on Bucky but you are fighting four at once. You are onto the last one when he raises his gun to shoot but you force his arm down. Not quick enough, it fires and clips your calf causing you to cry out from the pain 

It is not as bad as actually being shot in the leg but it still hurts like hell and you can’t put pressure on it. The room is pretty silent apart from footsteps you recognise to be Bucky approaching. You move quickly and uppercut the guy in the nose. The crack echoes throughout the room as the guy falls to the floor at your feet.

You turn to Bucky, his mouth agape and eyebrows raised in shock. ‘That was hot.’ He announces finally, making you laugh, you go to take a step towards him but realise too late that your injured leg won’t hold your weight. You would have fallen to the floor if Bucky hadn’t rushed to catch you.

‘Thanks.’ You chuckle, your faces are extremely close. Your eyes completely entranced in his. Your whole body warms at the safe feeling of being in his arms. You start to wonder what it would be like to fall asleep in these arms, to wake up the next morning still wrapped up in them. Protected.

You force yourself back to reality by clearing your throat. ‘We should probably get back to the team.’ You say and he nods. He puts his arm around your waist and you put yours over his shoulders to use him as a crutch.

The ride back up in the elevator goes smoothly this time and before you know it you are hobbling up to the quinjet where the rest of the team awaits. Natasha and Steve are both looking back and forth from you to Bucky in confusion.

‘What the hell happened?’ Steve asks not trying to hide how baffled he is that you and Bucky are holding onto each other and not arguing. Natasha simply smirks. Bucky helps you into a seat then sits opposite you with a wink as you smile at him.

‘No, this is too weird. Please argue, bicker, roll your eyes. Anything.’ Sam begs Bucky who doesn’t break his eye contact with you. Bucky simply laughs knowing his behaviour is unsettling Sam and enjoying the newfound comradery with you.

[aizawa-needs-coffee]

Shinsou x reader who is really responsible but only acts like that because nobody was ever there for them and the reader has ✨trauma✨ but doesnt show it? bonus points is Shinsou walks in on them crying or smth and its angst to fluff and 10000000/10 if it ends in cuddles

I hope you like it!

Shinso x GN reader Angst/Fluff SFW All characters are 18+

Wordcount: 1,055

Shinso had been aware of you since the school year began, watching as you helped everyone who needed it, he was there when you made friends with Denki and helped him study to pass exams, the nights you would stay up and try your best to get the blond to pay attention. He’d seen you help Midoriya when it came to the brash and obnoxious Bakugo picking on him in the hallways.

Every single time anyone needed help he saw you there at the for front trying your best. He’d asked you in passing once “Why do you do it? Why help everyone?” and you’d just offered him this smile, this sweet, rehearsed smile he’d seen a thousand times “It’s the responsible thing to do, we are heroes after all right?”

He’d never mentioned it again, your reason had been good enough at the time, everyone who wanted to be a hero was bound to have that mentality. The responsibility to help whoever was in need.

One night after he’d had extra training with Aizawa-sensai he was slowly making his way back to the dorms, the hallways so quiet, such a stark contrast from the day when the place was filled with students and staff, bristling with so much energy. Being able to hear each of his footsteps felt unnatural.

His own foot fall suddenly not the only sound his ears could pick up, the shuffling of chair legs on the floor caught his attention to the right, the light was still on, maybe a teacher had staid behind to do marking he mused to himself walking past the door without a second thought. Shinso paused midstep when the sound of a sob broke into the air.

He should mind his own business, he knew that he didn’t like when others fussed over him either, but something about the sad sobs had his heart aching, it felt tight in his chest. The sorrowful muffled wails coming from the room. He sighed outwardly, was he going to regret getting involved?

Sliding the door open he was surprised to see you sat at one of the neatly arranged desks, face buried in your arms as you cried your heart out, no regard to the sound of the sliding door, even when he closed it and stepped forward.

You did not stir from where you cried into your arms, body shivering from each soul wrenching sob, he rubbed his neck nervously and let out cough, he felt bad that you hadn’t noticed his presence, he didn’t want to come off as being intrusive to what was obviously a very private moment.

Lifting your head, eyes red and puffy, tear stained cheeks you sniffled, blinking your blurred vision when you made out who it was. “S-Shinso…h..hey!” there it was, the bright fake smile you wore everyday like it was also part of your uniform.

“Stop it” He was shocked at how blunt that had come out, but the mask you wore at seeing the purple haired male slipped, your lip quivered, putting your arm over your eyes not wanting him to see you cry any more then he already had.

“I can-can’t” you sobbed in a pleading tone, thinking Shinso had meant the tears that still ran freely down your face, soaking the sleeve of your blazer, he clicked his tongue and dropped his bag from his shoulder, making his way over to you.

“Not the crying” you looked over your makeshift shield at him, blinking back more tears, gasping in shock as he knelt on one knee, eye level with you now. “I’m not someone you need to put that fake smile on for, I can see through it” he started, and you trembled at his words, had it always been that obvious?

“I’m so tired Shinso” You let your arm fall by your side, not looking at him, unable to make eye contact, you felt so weak. “I’m so tired of it, I shouldn’t have to be this grown up yet b..but there’s no one… no one to look after me!” fresh tears filled your eyes as you lifted your head now.

“No one cares about me..n..not my f..family” You felt like you couldn’t breathe, the tightening in your chest, the tears coming too strong now, the hic ups taking your breath away, the cusp of a panic attack forcing it’s way into your senses.

He couldn’t do it anymore, seeing you falling apart piece by piece in front of him, the pain that radiated off your words, the unpleasant tingle of familiarity he felt. He moved forward, arms grabbing you and pulling you against him. You choked on a sob, suddenly Shinso had his arms around you, your chin perched on his shoulder. You let it go, the tears, every overwhelming feeling of loneliness, bitterness, everything.

And Shinso held you, grounded you, he rubbed your back as you started to run out of steam, your painful wails simmering down to small whimpers. He gently pulled away to look at you once your body had gone limp against his, his hands on your arms as he did so.

“You can’t be responsible for everyone” Shinso frowned, hands sliding down to find your knees, resting there. Another sigh, he wasn’t good at this stuff, it was why he’d tried his best to remain on the outside.

“I j..” He cut you off, standing to his full height and offering you his hand. “No, I don’t want to hear it, you need to start letting people in” God he hated the irony in his own words, Aizawa’s advice really, but you both needed to hear it.

“You have to start living for you, some people aren’t worth it and some people… “he paused thinking about the friends he was slowly making “Are going to have your back too, just give them the chance to be” You nodded your head, wiping your eyes on your sleeve before allowing yourself to be helped up.

“It’s hard but the dumbasses in this class are the best people to help with that.”

You laughed at his playful insult, feeling the emotions from just before start to leave your body, feeling stronger and braver with your own “Even you?” It was his turn to stare at you, blinking his tired eyes.

“Yeah, even me”

[mooshys]

the silver lining of bad first dates

summary: a date gone wrong. a walk in the rain. a simple conversation in a ramen shop. mundane slice of life and mutual pining with kuroo.

word count: 2.1k

author’s note and warnings: curse words galore. set in time-skip. pure word vomit. kuroo’s one of those characters that I’m so scared to even consider writing for because I feel as though I’ll never truly be able to “get” his character. whatever though, I tried.

This date fucking sucked.

Point-blank. No sugarcoating because the dude sitting on the opposite side of the dinner table was more interested in the JASDAQ than your name. Seriously, he couldn’t even be bothered to listen to you talk about your alma mater before he swooped in and started blanketing his insecurities with his recent Bitcoin investment. 

Talk about lame.

Wine and hors d’oeuvres be damned, you were making an escape before he started mansplaining the economy. Even wagyu couldn’t save this candlelit disaster.

Making no attempt to be discreet, you whipped your phone out of your bag and typed up a quick text:

Mind picking me up? Shitty date.

Ping! 

Seriously? Again? What’d this guy do this time?

Ping!

Send the address

Ping!

I swear, this is the last time I’m picking you up

You smiled at the screen, thumbs moving fast.

That’s what you said last week

A bubble with three dots appeared, disappeared, and reappeared.

Ping!

Five minutes.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

Like every cliché bad first date, the weather made sure to mimic the mood. The rainfall was nothing less than dreadful, a downpour that left the streets empty as most people kept indoors to avoid getting soaked.

“You’re so lucky that I didn’t have to work overtime tonight,” Kuroo began, standing close to you in an attempt to shield you both from the shower with his janky umbrella. “Otherwise, you’d be walking in the rain or sitting there having your dinner ruined from hearing that guy talk about his gains in the market.”

You laughed at the truth of his words. There really was no one else who knew you like Kuroo. 

“And you know I would’ve walked in the rain out of the two options. I can’t believe someone so dick-ish exists that I’d bail out on a free meal,” you said, raising your voice over the heavy pelting.

Without any warning, a trio of college kids rushed past you two, not paying attention to the other pedestrians walking the sidewalks as their only priority in mind was making it back home before catching a cold. They had their backpacks held up to cover their heads, but it wasn’t much help as their clothes were completely soaked.

“See that?” Kuroo jabbed a thumb over his shoulder. “You would’ve been running like those kids all the way back to your apartment if I didn’t show up.”

You lightly elbowed him and rolled your eyes. Rain fell on your shoulder from the sudden movement, but Kuroo repositioned the umbrella to prevent you from getting wet. “As if,” you murmured, hugging your body in an attempt to keep warm. “Thanks for picking me up. Again.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re oh so welcome,” he waved off your words and then cackled when you narrowed your eyes at him. Sometimes he really knew how to push your buttons. “Anyway, are you trying to date a bunch of crappy guys on purpose? Because I feel like that’s what you’re trying to do.”

“It’s not like I ask to go through a bunch of crappy first dates!” you said, letting out a huff of hot air. The past month had been riddled with unsuccessful first dates. Statistically speaking, you were an outlier; the average person probably went through a handful of bad first dates in a single year: you went through that number in a mere month. Multiple standard deviations past, you were way out of the norm. “Maybe I’m just a magnet for awful guys who only have a thing for themselves.”

Kuroo scoffed. “Or maybe you just like to make my life a little bit harder.”

You smiled at his words.

“Maybe.”

Besides the realization that you were like a honeytrap to flies when it came to bad first dates, another constant came from the start of it all: Kuroo. You weren’t expecting much from the first SOS call; really, just someone to walk you back home when it was late and the taxi fares were jacked up. But you would never forget the first time he waited for you outside that overhyped bar with a bag of take-out, his tie loosened and hair messy because he had just left the office and rushed to the nearest place that sold yakisoba for a decent price.

Maybe you did make his life a little bit harder. It was selfish, but whenever you had a bad date, you actually started to anticipate your escape because that meant Kuroo would be there for you.

He was your silver lining for the past month.

Red brick walls came into view once you two rounded the corner into a more secluded alley, revealing a familiar site that made you hungry. A neon sign which turned brighter due to the haze of the rain drew you in like a moth to a flame. It flickered, but still kept its light. Another constant.

Underneath the awning of the restaurant, Kuroo retracted his umbrella and shook the excess water off of it. He shoved it in the small bin filled with umbrellas belonging to the other patrons and dragged the soles of his shoes on the mat before pulling the door open. 

“Let’s just get some ramen,” he said, ushering you inside. You took the first steps and situated yourself at a lone table. He followed and a waitress quickly took your orders, soon rushing back to the kitchen to help with the line of tickets pinned to the wall. 

“Ramen on a rainy day,” you said, giving a low whistle. “You know your stuff.”

“Duh, ramen tastes best when you’re freezing,” he replied, pulling on his necktie to loosen it. He grabbed two pairs of chopsticks along with a pair of spoons, placing a set in front of you. “And it tastes pretty good after bad dates too.”

“You’re talking to the queen of bad first dates.”

“Oh, I’ve had my fair share too, Your Highness.”

As if on cue, two bowls of ramen were brought over from the kitchen along with an extra soft boiled egg as soon as he finished his sentence. The soup had small ringlets floating at the top from the fat of the broth along with bright green scallions acting as a garnish to offer a vibrant and appetizing color. Wasting no time, you both gave thanks and started to dig in.

“You know,” he started, breaking his chopsticks apart and dipping them into the broth. He pulled up a nice amount of noodles, the steam rising up higher than before. “I really think you should quit dating guys who suck.”

Following Kuroo, you did the same and blew at your noodles. “You say it like it’s easy.”

“It is. It’s so easy.” He ate a mouthful and swallowed before speaking again. “You have your top tier guys, your average guys, and then your totally shitty guys. I mean absolute trash—these are the guys you’re dating. Avoid them and all your problems will be solved.”

“Ugh, I feel like we go through this conversation after every single mishap of a date.”

Translation: Kuroo, you sound like my nagging mother.

“Because you never learn.”

Translation: I will nag at you all I want.

You sighed. “Love’s a lot more complicated than you make it.”

“Whatever. Just find a guy who isn’t an asswipe, and then we can talk.”

As you two continued to eat, the kitchen staff remained lively. The sounds of ceramic bowls clattering together along with the static hum of an old radio buzzing some city pop tune your mom would have listened to in her youth acted as background noise while chatting. 

“So... what kind of guy do you think you are?” you asked, curious to hear his answer. Kuroo was in the middle of slurping his noodles and held a hand up to signal you to give him a second.

“Me?” He pointed at himself and you nodded. Who else would you be asking? “I’m your average guy.”

You frowned. “No way.”

“What, you think I’m an absolute trash kind of guy? Harsh.”

“No, I think you’re definitely top tier. Average guys don’t go out of their way to do stuff like this.”

Kuroo raised a brow at you and set his chopsticks down. His bowl was half finished, but he was more interested in what you had to say. “Stuff like what?”

“You know,” you motioned the space between you two, “doing this awful-first-date-rescue-at-the-drop-of-a-hat kind of stuff. No questions asked. Average guys don’t do that. Average guys just pay for your meal and maybe give you their jacket when it’s kind of cold. And sometimes they call you some gross pet name like...” You shivered at the thought. “Kitten or something.”

He looked slightly taken aback. “You don’t like being called kitten?”

“No, something about it sounds gross.”

“That’s just because you haven’t found the right guy to say it to you when—“

Not wanting to hear the rest of what he had to say, you quickly crumpled up a napkin into a ball and tossed it at him. He threw his head back, putting on an act as if you actually did any damage to him.

“Stop. Please. Enough. Don’t even finish what you’re going to say.” You went back to devouring your bowl, the noodles more soft than before. Still tasted great as you shoveled in mouthfuls. “I don’t wanf tew heur et!”

Sporting a disgusted look, Kuroo grabbed a few napkins from the dispenser and slid them to your side of the table. “Jeez, you eat like that whenever you’re on a date? Maybe I saved that guy from you.”

“Well, you’re the one stuck with all of this now,” you motioned a hand to your entirety and wiggled an eyebrow. “Consider yourself lucky.”

He held his chin in the palm of his hand and stared at you from across the table, eyes still holding a glint of amusement under the low lighting of the restaurant. His bowl was nearly finished, yet he focused his attention on you, allowing a small smile to grace his lips as he pondered your words.

You eyed him, his gaze feeling a bit different from before. “What are you doing?”

“Considering,” he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“...It shouldn’t take you that long to,” you mumbled and ate another mouthful of noodles. He kept at it and soon started to crack up. When you narrowed your eyes at him, he shook his head and pushed another pile of napkins your way. 

“There’s a scallion at the corner of your lips,” he tapped a hand on his bottom lip and cackled when you rushed to grab a napkin and wipe it away. Heat rose to your face and you sucked on your teeth.

“You know what? Forget about me calling you a top tier guy. It never happened.”

He placed a hand over his heart, wounded by your words. “It was kitten, wasn’t it?”

Unable to contain yourself, you laughed into your hand, shoulders shaking. You had to set your chopsticks down as you fanned your face, trying to get rid of the tears threatening to spill from the corner of your eyes. “If I ever heard that from another guy, I would walk out. The second the word came out of his mouth, I would pack up my things, leave, and never look back.”

“But you’re not right now.”

“I’m not.”

“Because I’m a top tier guy. Admit it.”

Because it’s you.

You shook your head and waved the white flag. “Right, that’s exactly it.”

Kuroo crossed his arms in front of his chest, satisfied with your answer. Like he won something from this conversation. He liked the way your lips tugged into a smile, not too tight, but enough to showcase the apples of your cheeks; he liked these nights when he could unwind after a long day of work and laugh about stupid pet names; he loved how easy it all was. 

Consideration done and over with, he went back to finish his bowl, the steam from the broth no longer visible to the naked eye.

“Eat up or it’ll get cold,” he said and sipped on the broth. It was still warm, much to his surprise. “I’ll walk you back home when we’re done.”

You took small bites, prolonging the meal in any way possible: listening to him talk about his lazy cubicle partner, ordering another side of gyoza, folding a napkin to tell him his fortune through grade school methods. Both your bowls were empty, pushed to the side with a sliver of broth left as the focus was neither the food nor the JASDAQ jerk from hours before, but rather mundane conversation that went in circles until the shop emptied out.

A hundred dates could go wrong only for Kuroo to show up and make things right.

Maybe it was time for him to become more than a silver lining.

[tigerkirby215]

5e Sona, the Maven of the Strings build (League of Legends)

(Artwork by Shilin Huang. Made for Riot Games.)

(Shit meme by yours truly.)

Revealing my Champion Mastery just to say that I play a lot of Sona. Don’t flame me for playing Seraphine and Yuumi I swear to god, and I have no idea why Teemo is in my top 10 highest mastery champs ngl.

Anyways you have no idea how happy I am as a Sona main that my girl is now top tier. I came to League of Legends from Overwatch (yes really) and I used to main Lucio in OW along with some of the more “techy” characters like Symmetra and Torbjorn. (Came to OW from TF2 where I mained Engineer and Medic.) Sona was a natural fit for me as a champion who was both easy to play and very similar to Lucio. It also helps that I joined the Rift during the single most engaging meta to ever grace this game. I was kinda too shit to play Janna but the Ardent Censer meta is also why I have such a high mastery on Lulu tbh.

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But enough about my history with League: Sona! Honestly when I think of an archetypical support Sona pops into my head a lot sooner than Soraka: a champion based on empowering their teammates in as many ways as possible with heals, shields, movement speed, and CC to hold the enemy team down. I’ve always loved playing her because she feels like much more of a macro oriented character than other supports, with team-wide support as opposed to keeping one person alive like Soraka or Yuumi or focusing on CC like Morgana and Nami.

I’m going to build most if not all the champions eventually but man I am happy to tackle Sona now. She’s always been on my mind as my main but it was pretty difficult to think of how to make her. I think this build is good enough though!

Wow that was much longer of an intro than I’m used to. You can really tell which champions I’m excited for lol.

GOALS

Everything in harmony - Sona boosts everyone on her team with her songs as they fill the air.

Triple time! - Sona’s ability to boost her whole team into a good position is always beneficial.

Crescendo! - Fun fact: Sona’s ultimate is canonically extremely painful as she forces you to contort your limbs against your will. Why is Sona needlessly macabre? Well remember that Riot also wrote Volibear as an Eldritch old god.

RACE

Sona is Human but if you want to be cool you can make her a Kalashtar for resistance to Psychic damage and advantage on Wisdom saves. Regardless we’re going to be making what’s known as a dollar store Kalashtar with Variant Human. Increase your Charisma by 1 as well as your Constitution because we kinda don’t need much else. You also get proficiency in one skill of your choice which will of course be Performance, and a language which you can pick as you fancy: you won’t be speaking it anyways lmfao.

That’s because “Only you can hear me summoner; what masterpiece shall we play today?” Grab the Telepathic feat to complete this dollar store Kalashtar package. Increase your Charisma score by 1 and get a 60 foot telepathy to speak while being mute. You also learn the Detect Thoughts spell and can cast it once without using a spell slot. "Did he want... four autographs? I don't understand."

ABILITY SCORES

15; CHARISMA - Charisma is tied to performance and all the other stuff a Demacian noblewoman is expected to be good at.

14; DEXTERITY - Something something medium armor; even if you wear a dress there’s no reason you can’t have some padding beneath it!

13; STRENGTH - Hey this isn’t something something medium armor!

12; CONSTITUTION - Sona may be squishy in League but I value not dying more than good skill checks honestly.

10; WISDOM - Speaking of not dying: Wisdom saves are more common, and Insight is more useful than most Intelligence skills.

8; INTELLIGENCE - We had to dump something so unfortunately Intelligence gets the short end of the stick. You may have studied under the illustrious Buvelle family but most of those lessons were music classes.

If you want a better stat array going 13 / 14 / 12 / 10 / 10 / 14 with Point Buy is perfectly viable, and if your DM is cool enough to let you multiclass without Strength then you’re more than welcome to dump it.

BACKGROUND

There’s two obvious backgrounds that fit Sona: the first is Entertainer for proficiency with Acrobatics and a skill of your choice (since we already took Performance lol.) You also get proficiency with Disguise Kits and your Etwahl! (That’s what Sona’s instrument is called btw.) Your background feature By Popular Demand allows you to play any stage once. "Some, just the once.” You can perform in exchange for a place to stay, and when you do so the local people will remember your wonderful performance!

But making an Entertainer Bard is kinda cliché, no? If you want to lean into Sona’s Demacian heritage go for the Noble background. This gives you proficiency with Persuasion and History as well as a gaming set of your choice: unfortunately Tellstones isn’t an option (unless your DM decides otherwise!) so a Dragonchess Set will do well enough. Oh and you get another language that you won’t speak: fun! Your Position of Privilege makes it easy for you to arrange meetings with other important people, and the commonfolk will be kind and cordial with you.

(Screenshot from the Tellstones: King’s Gambit trailer by Riot Games.)

I personally opted to go for Noble when making this build, but if you want to choose Entertainer go right ahead! Backgrounds don’t affect too much overall and it’s up to you (and your DM) to make your own Sona!

(Artwork from League of Legends Wild Rift. Made for Riot Games. RIOT PLEASE UPDATE MUSE SONA ON PC I’M BEGGING YOU!)

THE BUILD

LEVEL 1 - BARD 1

I mean what else did you expect? Bards get proficiency in three musical instruments of their choice: a Lyre is the closest you’ll get to Sona’s Etwahl, though a Dulcimer is also pretty close. I’d also recommend grabbing a Lute since most magical instruments come in Lute variety.

You also get proficiency in 3 skills of your choice like Perception to watch wards, Insight to watch people, and Athletics for a bit of Tenacity to break out of grapples. (As well as potentially grab some people yourself! Although Acrobatics is also perfectly fine for escaping grapples.)

As a Bard you can boost your ADC with Bardic Inspiration, letting them add a d6 to attack rolls, ability checks, and saving throws. You have a number of these equal to your Charisma modifier and they come back after a Long Rest.

But of course the main reason to play a Bard is to do Demacian-banned Spellcasting! You learn two cantrips from the Bard list like Vicious Mockery for some diminuendo, making it harder for the enemy to hurt your allies while also cutting them down to size. (I don’t know if your DM will let you slap your Etwahl angrily and then point at them judgingly, but you may have to break your vow of silence every now and then.) You can also learn Prestidigitation for all sorts of general magic stuff that you really shouldn’t do in front of anyone important.

You of course also learn 4 Bard spells like Cure Wounds and Healing Word for the atypical healing spells, Dissonant Whispers for some Hymn of Valor damage, and Detect Magic which you’ll likely be expected to cast as the designated support. *Sigh* Always gotta buy wards.

LEVEL 2 - BARD 2

Second level Bards could be called a Jack of All Trades, as you get to add half your proficiency bonus to any skill you aren’t proficient in. This means even if your ability scores are bad the skills you don’t have proficiency in are still good enough! You also get Song of Rest, letting your allies recover an extra d6 of health during Short Rests. And if you have Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything  Magical Inspiration will let your allies add their Bardic Inspiration to the damage or healing of a spell they cast!

And finally you can learn another spell: against as the designated support you’re expected to take Identify.

LEVEL 3 - BARD 3

Third level Bards get Expertise in two skills: Performance is an obvious must and Persuasion would probably be good as well.

But more importantly you get to choose your Bardic College and if you want to both shield your allies and speed them up look no further than the College of Glamour! That’s because Mantle of Inspiration grants 5 temporary hitpoints to a number of creatures within 60 feet of you equal to your Charisma modifier (which can include yourself by the way!) Additionally those creatures can move up to their movement speed as a reaction without provoking opportunity attacks, making this a great tool to reposition an ally who’s caught in a dangerous position!

You’re also capable of creating an Enthralling Performance: if you perform for at least 1 minute, you can attempt to inspire wonder in your audience. At the end of the performance you can choose a number of humanoids within 60 feet of you who watched and listened to all of it, up to a maximum equal to your Charisma modifier. Each target must succeed on a Wisdom saving throw or be charmed by you.

While charmed in this way, the target idolizes you, and speaks glowingly of you to anyone who talks to them. They also hinder anyone who opposes you, although they avoid violence unless it was already inclined to fight for you. This effect ends on a target after 1 hour unless they take any damage, you attack it, or it witnesses you attacking or damaging any of its allies. If a target succeeds on its saving throw the target has no hint that you tried to charm it, and you can use this ability once per Short or Long Rest.

Finally you can learn second level spells like Hold Person, for a one-man version of your ultimate.

LEVEL 4 - BARD 4

Ah the first of many Ability Score Improvements. You may have noticed our deliberately uneven Charisma modifier: that’s because I’m going to be taking the Fey Touched feat for +1 to your Charisma, the Misty Step spell (for Flash, of course), and the Gift of Alacrity spell from Explorer’s Guide to Wildemount for a Song of Celerity! Accelerated movement? I concur.

You can also learn another spell as well as another cantrip! For your cantrip take Mage Hand for help warding those hard-to-reach areas, and for your spell take Lesser Restoration, because yeah it’s also your job to buy Mikael’s. *Sigh.*

LEVEL 5 - BARD 5

5th level Bards get a Font of Inspiration that lets their Bardic Inspiration come back after a Short Rest as well as a Long Rest. That’s good because your Bardic Inspiration increases to a d8, which also boosts your Mantle of Inspiration to grant 8 temporary hitpoints!

You can also learn another spell like Hypnotic Pattern: while it won’t do any damage and your allies can’t hit the dancing enemies it’ll still be the best recreation of your ultimate for now.

(Artwork by Katie “TeaTime” De Sousa. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 6 - PALADIN 1

I hope you weren’t expecting this to be a pure Bard build, because then I’d just be building Seraphine again! Grab your something something Medium Armor as well as a shield (well technically you need both hands free to play a musical instrument) it’s Paladin time, master of auras! 

Paladins get a Lay on Hands pool equal to 5 times their Paladin level for some more healing. You can touch a creature to give them any amount of health from your Lay on Hands, or use 5 hitpoints from your Lay on Hands pool to neutralize a poison or disease affecting them. You also get Divine Sense to locate any Celestial, Fiend, or Undead as long as they’re within 60 feet of you and not behind total cover. Don’t worry it gets a lot more exciting later.

LEVEL 7 - PALADIN 2

Second level Paladins can choose their Fighting Style and you’re still more of a mage than a warrior, so Blessed Warrior will give you two cantrips from the Cleric list that use your Charisma! Guidance is an obvious must for a support and Toll the Dead is a great option if you want to go full AP.

Should you have options for attacks to target enemies who have high Wisdom? Yeah probably: Sacred Flame might be a good choice.

Of course cantrips also imply more Spellcasting! You can prepare a number of spells equal to your Charisma modifier plus half your Paladin level (rounded down) which is currently a freaking lot of spells. Let’s just go down the list, shall we?

Bless is great to buff your team and make them harder, better, faster, and stronger.

Command is a mostly harmless Enchantment spell that will force your foes to do as you, well, command. I’d argue “dance” is a reasonable Command.

Protection from Evil and Good is never bad to have in your back pocket in case you’re fighting either Kayle or Fiddlesticks.

And Shield of Faith will let you boost your ADC’s survivability with Ardent Censer!

I know you can prepare more spells but there isn’t much I want from first level of Paladin. I am contractually obligated to mention that you can also turn your spell slots into a Divine Smite if you hit an enemy with a melee weapon, but you aren’t really going to be using weapons in this build. That’s right boys hop aboard the caster Paladin train!

LEVEL 8 - PALADIN 3

Third level Paladins get to choose their Sacred Oath and Oath of the Watchers may seem weird but it’s really good at defending your allies. That’s because you get two different Channel Divinity options: Abjure the Extraplanar works similarly to the Cleric’s Turn Undead feature except it affects Aberrations, Celestials, Elementals, Fey, and Fiends.

Watcher’s Will meanwhile lets you choose a number of creatures you can see within 30 feet of you, up to your Charisma modifier. For 1 minute, you and the chosen creatures have advantage on Intelligence, Wisdom, and Charisma saving throws. This means that in a party of 6 this ability can give your whole party advantage on all mental saves, which is huge for keeping everyone alive against nasty casters! See? Demacia can use your magic!

Speaking of magic you get Alarm and Detect Magic as Oath spells. (Might want to swap Detect Magic from your Bard list with Mass Healing Word ty Tasha’s.) You can also use Harness Divine Power to regain a spell slot equal to half your proficiency bonus a number of times per Long Rest. And you get Divine Health, because you don’t take a sick day to stop complaining about Seraphine.

LEVEL 9 - PALADIN 4

4th level Paladins get another Ability Score Improvement: cap off that Charisma for maximum AP scaling!

(Artwork by Kelly Aleshire & Esben Lash Rasmussen. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 10 - PALADIN 5

5th level Paladins can finally prepare second level spells! As a Watchers Paladin you get access to Moonbeam as well as See Invisibility, both of which are very good for dealing with incoming gankers.

You can also prepare spells like Aid to boost your allies’ HP, Prayer of Healing (ty Tasha’s) for some out-of-combat healing, and Warding Bond for a Knight’s Vow.

Oh and you get an Extra Attack, which sure would matter if you were actually using weapons.

LEVEL 11 - PALADIN 6

6th level reasons get the main reason Sona’s a Paladin: Aura of Protection! All your saving throws are increased by an amount equal to your Charisma modifier, which is a full +5 currently! But what’s special about this ability is that it also applies to your allies within 10 feet of you, letting you give out auras a plenty to keep your allies safe!

You can also prepare another spell but again: not much I really want. So we’re going to be waiting a little while longer once again.

LEVEL 12 - PALADIN 7

7th level Watchers Paladins get Aura of the Sentinel, or as I like to call it: Song of Celerity. When you or any creature of your choice within 10 feet of you roll for initiative, they gain a bonus to initiative equal to your proficiency bonus. While this may make positioning a little difficult (everyone’s going to have to huddle around you) this ability guarantees that you can speed up all your important allies to make sure they get their powerful abilities off!

LEVEL 13 - PALADIN 8

8th level Paladins get another Ability Score Improvement or a Feat. You may have noticed your uneven Constitution score: grab good ol’ Resilient Constitution for a boost to your health and even more insurance on your Concentration checks. With your Paladin aura and proficiency you’d have a +12 total to your Constitution checks currently, meaning that if you take 24 damage or less you won’t even have to roll for Concentration!

LEVEL 14 - PALADIN 9

You are probably the only Paladin who cares about spells, so it’s nice that you get 3rd level spells now! Watchers Paladins get two very strong third level spells: Nondetection will help you deward and keep your allies safe from enemies that may try to sneak a peak at you, but Counterspell is the true best choice to stop danger from befalling your allies. What’s very good about Counterspell is that as a Bard you get to add Jack of All Trades to the skill check, meaning it’s far easier for you to deny an incomming spell than any other spellcaster! “Mages have enough problems without you.”

Of course you can prepare some more spells like Aura of Vitality for Aria of Perseverance, and Revivify for an ADC’s Guardian Angel. But having access to spells like Remove Curse, Dispel Magic, Crusader’s Mantle, and even Daylight on the Paladin spell list are all extremely useful to be able to prepare. Remember that you are doing yourself a disservice by not taking time to think about what the best spells to prepare would be for your current quest. "Every note is important."

(Artwork by Kelly Aleshire & Esben Lash Rasmussen. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 15 - BARD 6

Now that we’ve got all our auras it’s time to go back to Bard for Mantle of Majesty! As a bonus action, you cast Command without expending a spell slot as you take on an appearance of unearthly beauty for 1 minute. During that minute you can cast Command as a bonus action on each of your turns without expending a spell slot. Additionally any creature charmed by you automatically fails its saving throw against the command you cast with this feature. You do have to concentrate on this feature (like a spell), and once you use it you can’t do so again until you finish a long rest.

You can also learn another spell but there isn’t much I want from the third level of Bard, really. Oh and you get Countercharm which is awful and I hate it, but since you didn’t take a 10th level in Paladin I suppose you have to use it. Spend an action to give allies advantage on their saving throws against charms and fears, I guess.

LEVEL 16 - BARD 7

7th level Bard; 4th level spells. Freedom of Movement will let you help either yourself or an ally with Mikael’s Crucible, and Dimension Door is great to get into lane fast, or back to base fast!

LEVEL 17 - BARD 8

8th level Bards get another Ability Score Improvement, and if you don’t like the look of something something Medium Armor then the Eldritch Adept feat might be able to help. Take the Mask of Many Faces invocation to be able to cast Disguise Self at will to change your skins as you please.

Could you have taken this earlier? Absolutely. Are there better invocations? Yeah probably, but by level 17 you can make some of your own choices. Build your own Sona: this is merely a guide and you can make your own choices.

Speaking of own choices: take whichever spell you want at this level. There’s plenty of great ones for a 4th level Bard and I can’t recommend anything in particular to you. Every musician has their own style, and it’s up to you to find your own!

(Artwork by Yan Li. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 18 - BARD 9

9th level Bards get to pretend that increasing Song of Rest from a d6 to a d8 by total level 18 is helpful.

You do get access to 5th level spells like Mass Cure Wounds, which is like Mass Healing Word but better! "Harmoniously."

LEVEL 19 - BARD 10

10th level Bards get Expertise in two more skills: Perception is an obvious must to watch over your wards but beyond that? Honestly pick your poison with whatever skill you want since by level 19 you can make your own choices. (Though my personal choice would be Athletics to hopefully give some more safety against grapples.)

But of course the main boon of reaching level 10 in Bard is the Magical Secrets! ...I’m afraid I’m going to have to disappoint you again: there honestly aren’t any spells in particular I want as Magical Secrets. Sure I could recommend spells like Haste or whatever but are they really going to be that great by total level 20? To be honest even the spells on the Bard list like Animate Objects, Greater Restoration, Hold Monster, Rary's Telepathic Bond, Scrying, and Synaptic Static are very good (although I’d sooner replace some of your old spells with them.)

Again I know this is supposed to be a “guide” but most people won’t hit level 19 anyways, so I don’t think it’s that bad for me to recommend you take your own steps to make your own Sona. Hell, build some AP if you want! I know I would!

LEVEL 20 - BARD 11

Our final level is the 11th level of Bard and I’ll be honest: it’s just to add Otto's Irresistible Dance to your spell list. It can only affect one person but it’s still your ultimate by total level 20.

Oh and you were supposed to get a cantrip last level. Uhhhhh I dunno take Mending lol.

FINAL BUILD

PROS

The rhythm connects us all - You have dozens of spells to keep your team alive and active during a fight, not to mention that all your Paladin auras and abilities really help them give 110%. It’s worth mentioning that Gift of Alacrity combined with Aura of the Sentinel is a d8 + 6 to an Initiative roll, which will almost always guarantee that whoever you want to go first will be going first!

A true masterpiece should celebrate living - Despite your somewhat weird level split you maxed out the only stat which matters for you: Charisma. And woah holy shit turns out Paladins are really good with maxed out Charisma! +5 to all saves means even your lowest save is a +4, and the saves your proficient in vary between +13 for Dexterity and Constitution (both very common!) and a whopping +16 save on Charisma!

Curtains up; I'm ready - Jack of All Trades also does quite nicely to help your middling skills. Even though I dumped most of your mental skills you’re still proficient enough that you won’t be completely helpless when caught off guard. And when you’re in the zone with Persuasion or Performance you are easily the best girl around!

CONS

Don't make me get off stage - It was my intention to recreate Sona’s positional gameplay with this build but it does present some gameplay issues when trying to maximize your effectiveness. Where do you position yourself as a character who’s still primarily a squishy caster despite your good saving throws and AC? Can you give everyone in your party support, or are they too spread out to get value out of your 10 foot range auras?

Quiet, please! - You have a damn good concentration check, but what do you concentrate on? Not only do you have a ton of spells but they all scale very good with levels and you have spell slots that go far higher than your maximum level spell. It can be hard to choose what to do with those 7th and 8th level slots.

The world is cruel... Until that changes, I'll never stop playing - One of many “meta” problems with this build was my choice to focus almost entirely on support. Sure Toll the Dead is a great damaging cantrip but your only two damaging spells are Moonbeam and Dissonant Whispers. Again: you don’t have to follow my build point-for-point and while you’ll be flamed in League for building Sona full AP I don’t think your friends will mind if you take some damaging spells.

But if you can’t tell it was really hard for me to come up with those downsides. With the exception of the positional requirements a Bardadin is a very strong build and Sona is a very strong support. Boost your teammates with your own amazing power and make sure everyone’s alive and jamming! Your power may have been forgotten over the years but no one’s ever upset to have a great support at their side. And remember: Seraphine may be in K/DA but you’re in Pentakill, and you have your own label! No one can replace DJ Sona!

undefined

[mostlysignssomeportents]

How to cheat on your taxes

Some things are hard to understand because they’re complicated, but when it comes to finance — and finance crimes — we enter the realm of things that are complicated so they’ll be hard to understand.

The Propublica Secret IRS Files leaks reveal the wealthy pay infinitesimal amounts of tax and the ultra-rich often pay no tax at all.

Propublica is careful to note that all of this is legal — that it’s how the system is supposed to work.

https://pluralistic.net/2021/06/15/guillotines-and-taxes/#carried-interest

But that’s not the whole story. A string of leaks from high-powered tax-evasion specialists have revealed that the richest people of every nation, up to prime ministers and “national treasures” avail themselves of fraudulent accounting to duck tax.

From the Paradise Papers to the Panama Papers to Luxleaks to Swissleaks and beyond, we have a wealth of evidence that many of the “legal” deductions the super-rich deploy are actually grounded in accounting frauds.

Even when there’s no fraud, some tactics are in such bad faith, reliant on such absurd readings of the law that they’re outlawed once they’re discovered. This comes in up Disney heiress Abigail Disney’s frank account of the workings of dynastic wealth.

https://pluralistic.net/2021/06/19/dynastic-wealth/#caste

“My grandfather Roy O. Disney…was so determined to prevent the government from taking any of the money he wanted to leave to his family that…what he did back then was so effective that most of it is illegal today.”

https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2021/06/abigail-disney-rich-protect-dynastic-wealth-propublica-tax/619212/

In the fall of 2020, a consortium of journalists reported out the Jersey Offshore leaks, a collection of 350,000 docs from an especially dirty trust company called La Hougue, on the British Channel Isle of Jersey, a notorious tax-haven.

https://globalreportingcentre.org/jersey-offshore/

The Jersey Offshore leaks had the misfortune to be published amid a pandemic, a once-in-a-generation antiracist uprising, a string of armed far-right assaults on US state-houses and a critical election, so the reporting barely registered, despite its significance.

But it’s worth revisiting those leaks, especially in light of the debate that the Secret IRS Files has provoked about the morality and legality of dynastic wealth preservation and the bizarre, complicated and hard-to-understand tactics deployed by tax evasion experts.

Last January, Mother Jones published an analysis of a key memo from La Hougue, in which Calyn Shaw and Sam Eifling worked with tax experts to analyze 11 tactics La Hougue advised their clients to employ.

https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2021/01/memo-how-to-hide-money-offshore/

These “11 ways” are definitely in the “complicated so they’ll be hard to understand” category, but at root, they all have a simple, common mechanism: La Hougue opens a secret account in a tax-haven for you and funnels money into it.

That’s it.

But like the conjuror who has 11 tricks that all rely on the same sleight, La Hogue has 11 different pretenses that are used to obscure the fraud and slide it under the noses of underfunded, overworked tax officials.

I. Consultancy: secretly incorporate a fake offshore “consultancy.” Bill your onshore business for “consulting” and write it off as a “business expense.” The money goes into your consultancy’s offshore, tax-free bank account, which you secretly control.

II. Expenses: Secretly create an offshore account. Pay money into it that you record as a “travel expense” or “gift” or “misc expense.” Keep the payments under the $10,000 threshold for formal reporting.

III. Metrocab: Buy stock options in a money-losing British taxi company called Metrocab that La Hougue secretly controls. La Hougue secretly funnels the money into your secret offshore account.

IV. Los Cabos: Fake an investment in a 65-acre property in Baja California that La Hougue secretly owns. They send you fake docs claiming you lost all your money. The money you send them actually goes into your secret offshore account.

V. Danehill Currency Fund: Borrow money from a company that La Hougue secretly owns and invest it in a “currency fund” La Hougue secretly runs. They fix it so your “investment” loses money (on paper) but actually all the money goes into your secret offshore account.

VI. Bad loans: Make “loans” to businesses secretly controlled by La Hougue. These loans are not repaid so you can write them off, but actually La Hougue just shovels the money into your offshore account.

VII. Mortgage default: Remortgage a property you own to a lender secretly controlled by La Hougue, then default and let La Hougue foreclose. La Hougue secretly transfers title to your offshore company.

VIII. Offshore property: Sell a property at a discount to an offshore buyer (really your offshore company). The discount is due to a contract that requires you be allowed to occupy the property for a month/year. You pay lower tax on the sale and the title is moved offshore.

IX. Redirecting money: If someone owes you money, get them to send it to your offshore company and just don’t declare the income.

X. Made-up penalty: When you sell a property, La Hougue forges a contract with your offshore company giving it the right to buy the property, with a penalty if you don’t sell it to them. You send some of the sale money to your company as a penalty and don’t pay taxes on it.

XI. Fake offshore investment: Sell 49% of your onshore business to an offshore company you secretly own or control. You don’t pay taxes on 49% of your onshore earnings or the eventual sale of the business.

Those are the 11 ways, and as you can see, once you cut through all the performative complexity, they’re all just obvious frauds. In fact, it seems the La Hougue partner who came up with these got bored and started repeating themself.

Parts of this read like a lazy D&D module, where you enter a series of nearly identical rooms and fight nearly identical monsters for nearly identical rewards — it’s a kind of soporific wickedness, what Dana Claire calls the “shield of boringness.”

La Hougue was never prosecuted for any of this and never will be. They shut down in 2007.

But that doesn’t mean that these scams were consigned to the dustbin of fraud history — far from it! La Hougue’s principles decamped to Panama and formed a new “consultancy” there.

The tissue-thin lies of the tax fraud and money-laundering industries are themselves very dull, but what is incredibly interesting is how hard it seems to be for the world’s tax authorities to pierce them.

The amount of political pressure not to look to hard at this stuff must be prodigious indeed.

Image: Neil Milne https://www.flickr.com/photos/borispumps/6936576065/

CC BY-SA: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/

[prongssmrrcury]

a very bleak christmas

wolfstar fic /// one shot

word count ( 6.2k ITS LONG SORRY)

fluff, not much smut

this turned out awfully long IM SORRY😭 having that said i hope you enjoy <33 ily mwahh

"you ready wormy?" james said, shutting his trunk and looking at his bed and around the dormitory to make sure hasnt forgotten anything. he looked over at the shorter boy with sandy coloured hair who was bending down apparently trying to get something he dropped from under the bed, but struggling a great deal. he nervously shot his head up giving james a weak smile and said "yes, im ready, i just dropped something here im not sure what-"

"just tell moony to fetch it for you while we're away" james said and peter just agreed and left the dormitory trailing after james with his trunk, shutting the door on his way. the gryffindor common room was emptier than usual, but the fireplace was lit with a couple of people huddling around it to shield themselves from the ruthless cold of december. despite this however, peoples spirits were as light as ever as almost everyone was departing for two weeks to spend christmas with their families, even lily evans stopped rolling her eyes every time james breathed, and started spending more time with him and ( to james' great delight) enjoying his company. speaking of lily, she was standing by the fireplace with her hair up in a ponytail with a furry winter cap on her head. james noticed her at once and made his way down the flight of stairs and tapped her shoulder softly, she turned around and gave him a warm smile, a short hug followed.

"happy holidays james!" she smiled so widely it watered james' eye. she called him james, not potter.

"happy holidays" he managed to respond, taken aback by the sudden affection she just showed him. she looked around furrowing her brows slightly then spoke, "wheres your trunk? have you not packed?"

"oh no i have! i left my trunk with peter to um, you know, come and say hi" he said the second part of the sentence quietly, she let out a soft laugh, god he just wanted to kiss her so bad. "wheres yours?" he asked quickly. she turned around slightly to show him her trunk which was standing behind her, tapping it twice.

"alright then, lets go down to breakfast, minnie wouldnt want us to be late" he told her, taking her hand and leading her out of the common room with him. he looked back at peter who was struggling with his own trunk and james' but peter just shot him a thumbs up as if he got everything under control.

"alright wormy, dont be late" he muttered. the pair of them walked down from the gryffindor tower to the entrance hall and right to the great hall where elaborate christmas decorations were encapsulating the place, giving the entire castle a more homey vibe. the four house tables were emptier than usual, james and lily made their way to the gryffindor table where they were met by a handsome boy with long hair that he managed to scruff in a very messy pony tail, and a taller boy sitting across him who seemed to find his buttering his toast to be a very intriguing activity. lily and james took seats next to them.

"morning" sirius spoke, looking at lily then at james.

"morning sirius, how are you" lily replied, who also began buttering her toast. sirius didnt respond right away, instead he eyed her then finally spoke, "oh im, im very good" it didnt really seem like it, sirius didnt seem to be in his loud, arrogant and flirtatious mood today, instead a rather dull and quiet one. lily looked at james silently trying to understand what had caused the sudden change in sirius behavior, she was met a mere shrug from james. the four of them sat in silence for the next ten minutes, no one breaking silence that seemed to have swallowed them. remus then looked up for the first time and sighed loudly, which made sirius look very attentively at him, waiting for him to say anything.

"im gonna go, im in the dorm if you want me pads. enjoy your holidays james, you too lily" he said lowly, also clearly in a dull mood in contrast to everyones mood right now. he got up and left, shooting them a weak smile before disappearing out of the great hall.

sirius watched him so closely even when he had gotten out of sight. it was common knowledge that the pair are in love and clearly fancied each other, almost everyone in school knew that. maybe its because of sirius' shameless attitude, cuddling with remus in the common room, sitting on his lap in the middle of the great hall, or pushing remus against a wall and just stand in front of him doing god knows what. the only problem was... neither sirius nor remus knew they liked each other. they obviously knew they had a different relationship than anyone else but they were so oblivious to the fact that theyre in love that it sometimes made james just want to scream it in their face.

"you okay pads?" james said mockingly, sirius had been staring at where remus left for at least ten minutes completely transfixed, he came back to his senses at once and looking abruptly between james and lily then back at his doughnut, fiddling with it slightly. he then shot james an alarmed look and said, "dont call me that james". he spoke so firmly, he knew james knew this is what remus calls him. no one was really allowed to use that nickname with him, even he and james who had a light hearted friendship that was basically based on jokes and pranks, sirius pronounced the words looking into james' eyes, which made james know he was being one hundred percent serious. james didnt respond, feeling a rush of guilt in his stomach, he just took a bite of his oatmeal.

"how are things with you two" james asked. sirius once again didnt respond right away but instead took time to ponder his answer.

"what do you mean how are things"

"you know, have you guys had a row or anything?" james asked, stuffing more oatmeal in his mouth.

"oh- um yea no. not really no" sirius hesitated a bit. the truth is that remus and him didnt have a row, but today was one of these occasions where sirius woke up finding himself on remus' bed not knowing how or why. it had happened a couple of times before and when it did, remus would immediately smile warmly at sirius and pamper him with kisses here and there on his cheek and his jaw. however, today, remus woke up a bit more shaky to the fact that he was in the same bed as sirius. he straightened his pyjamas quickly giving sirius an awkward smile and leaving without a word.

james dropped his oatmeal and looked at sirius looking serious for the first time, giving him a smile that carried something between sympathy and support.

"are you ever going to tell him?"

"tell him what" sirius said bluntly

james smirked. even lily suppressed a knowing look. sirius rolled his eyes.

"you guys are not onto that bullshit the whole school talks about right?" he asked cringing slightly.

"if the bullshit includes you and remus being blindly in love then yes" james gave a small laugh.

"literally blindly" lily mumbled, but sirius heard her and gave her a look.

"guys- hes my best mate"

"doing a lot of canoodling with your 'best mate' ?" james smirked rolling his eyes.

"first of all, what the fuck is canoodling james, this isnt the eighteenth century" he ppinted out the weird choice of wording.

"whatever, point is, people dont sleep on their 'best mates' chests every day padfoot" sirius opened his mouth to protest but james cut him again "just save your breath will you. im trying to help"

sirius sighed heavily burying his head in his hands and shaking it.

"i dont fucking know what to do prongs. fuck ugh i hate this so much why cant it be simpler" sirius' voice got weaker.

"mate just talk to him, remus cant read your mind. and its pretty obvious the feelings mutual" james tried to convince him.

"i dont know if hes into- you know, into me" sirius tried to explain. sirius had come out to the entire school three years ago so it was common knowledge that was gay.

"oh he is" lily said

sirius blinked.

"i mean, i spend a lot of time with him in our prefects meetings and in the library and stuff" she explained. sirius blinked again.

"i mean" she began again, "he talks about you an awful lot and seems to be quite fond of you" she smiled.

"look, you'll never know if you dont ask" james said again. "look at me, i had to ask lily out at least fifteen times-"

"james what the fuck this isnt the same, why are you even comparing it" sirius interrupted

"oh of course its not the same, but communication is key, no matter what the relationship is"

"yea and when i ask him out and he just says i misunderstood all his soft affectionate gestures, then stops hanging out with me because im gay and he would know i have feelings for him, that clearly arent mutual. i'll just ruin everything, and i'll lose probably the only person that likes me in this lousy world" sirius spilled, laughing bitterly.

"sirius! you know remus would never stop hanging out with you because of that, you know it!" james said, his voice getting a bit louder.

"yea but it'd be a sticky situation when your gay friend has feelings for you" sirius said, his eyes filled with tears that he wiped right away hoping james and lily didnt see that.

"sirius.." lily said lowly

"lily can you please check up on peter and help him if needs any assistance" james told her firmly, she didnt need telling twice, knowing he wanted to be left alone with sirius. she made her way out of the great hall until she was out of sight, then james look at sirius again who had his head buried in his hands once again.

"sirius i dont know whats gotten into you today, but you know damn well that neither moony or i would ever think of you any differently because you're gay. stop saying that as if its something that hinders you" this was one of the rare occasions where james was serious and firm. he wanted sirius to know meant every word that left his mouth. at this moment he heard a sniff followed by a weak sob.

"james, i sometimes wish i wanst- wasnt, you know, gay" he managed to say between sobs. james' face fell suddenly.

"no dont say that. please dont say that, you know we love you the way you are and we dont give two damns if you're gay or not" james got up and made his way across the table to sit next to sirius rather than in front of him.

"you're me best mate, i dont like seeing you like this. i love you a lot sirius and nothing your little overthinking brain comes up with could change that" he said, pulling sirius into a hug, so hard that he mightve broken a few ribs. he wasnt gonna let go before sirius does, he could stay here all day until sirius was ready to let go. he heard strong sniffs and felt his chest going up and down. sirius broke the hug after a few minutes, looking a lot more content than he had a few minutes before. james gave him his usual cheeky smile.

"your fucking snout sirius" james laughed, picking up a handkerchief trying to clean his shoulder.

"fuck off" sirius managed to laugh, sniffing again.

"thank you" sirius said quietly

"come off it, dont thank me" james smiled at him. he watched him grab a cigarette and right when he was about to light it with the tip of his wand james stopped him hesitantly. james never really liked to mother him about smoking or give him lectures about the effects smoking had, but he noticed sirius was eating less and smoking more the past couple of days. sirius shot a "what-do-you-want" look to which james responded, "um, can you please just eat something before you smoke" james said. he knew this was a touchy subject, he never liked to mention it but they were alone and he knows he's the only one sirius would listen to. sirius gave him a hesitant look, before stuffing the cigarette back in his pocket.

"just for you prongs" he rolled his eyes, taking a bite of his doughnut. james however was filled with so much joy seeing his best friend do that just for him.

"what are you smiling so much at you prat" sirius said between bites. james shook his head softly before saying, "im very proud of you sirius, i hope you know that" sirius smiled and laughed dismissively at that statement, james knew it touched him but sirius never really knew how to respond to affectionate words.

"you're very sappy you know that" sirius laughed slightly.

"whatever" james felt his cheeks go red. "anyway i have to get going before i get minnie mad on christmas" he said, getting up, swinging his backpack on his back leaving the hall.

"tell moony i say merry christmas" james called, leaving the great hall also disappearing out of sight.

~

later that night, james and lily departed home to spend the upcoming weeks with their families to celebrate christmas, so did most of the school. as homey and welcoming as the school felt, everyone loved going back to their family, everyone except sirius. sirius was never fond of his family, he never had a good relationship with them and all they did was make him more miserable, he would take any chance to be away from them. sirius was sat in the library that was emptier than usual (but the ceiling was enchanted to fake snow) he was sitting with two giant books opened in front of him, yellowed by age. he looked over at the books, he hadnt read a single word despite being here for nearly an hour. he came here in an attempt to distract himself from the intensifying amount of nerves and stress, however, he was so lost in his thoughts that not even that gigantic book can save him from his exhausting overthinking. he sighed heavily, feeling the weight of the world on his shoulder, shutting the books that made a loud thud and put them back in their place. sirius swung his backpack on his back and left the library making his way to the gryffindor tower. he just wanted to sleep. yes, sleep, thats what he needed. he went through the fat lady's portrait and climbed up the stairs to his dormitory, finding remus sitting on his four poster bed completely engulfed by a book. remus shot his eyes up the second he heard sirius walking in and gave him a wordless smile, going back to his book. sirius' stomach did a funny lurch.

"i was starting to think youve forgotten your way around the castle" remus said, flipping the page of his book, still reading it. sirius looked at him nervously, not sure what he meant by that.

"what?" sirius asked, he was going to take his shirt off and get in his pyjamas but stopped abruptly. he didnt wanna make remus uncomfortable around him, especially after what happened this morning. they always had a very intimate relationship though, changing in front of each other was never a problem. remus suppressed a chuckle which made sirius look at him, unsure what he found comical in this very intense atmosphere.

"you can take your shirt off if you want sirius" remus said, still poured into his book.

"how can you even see me?" sirius couldnt stop himself. remus looked up from his book and gave him a is-that-even-a-question look. sirius slipped his undone tie, unbuttoning his buttons his fingers shaking horribly for a reason he didn't understand. he knew remus was looking in his book (not that he didnt want remus looking) but he still felt like all the worlds eyes are on him. a couple of awfully long minutes passed and sirius finally was in his pyjama and got into his bed under his blanket and stared absentmindedly into the wall. remus flipped the page once again, he hadnt read a word on the previous page. how could he? he was so preoccupied by sirius changing in front of him. remus did freak out when he found himself on the same bed as sirius this morning. he doesnt know why he freaked out the way he did, its not like its the first time. he knew that this had made sirius extremely self conscious the whole day, he was wearing a very dull look. he had to make up for his unexplainable actions, he cant stand seeing sirius this upset, especially if he was the reason hes feeling like that. he couldnt stand seeing him in such a bad mood on breakfast this morning that he had to dismiss himself early. but sirius' loss of his loud flirtatious attitude was what stirred the pot for remus. he didnt walk in the dorm and try to slip in bed with remus, or get a kiss from him, or remotely try draw any attention to hismelf from remus rather than that book in his hand, which was as un-sirius as one can get.

"why were you late?" remus asked sirius, knowing hes not asleep. sirius mumbled something inaudible from his bed that remus didnt catch onto. remus furrowed his brows slightly. he shut his book and put it on the bed side table, the sound he made when he shut his book made sirius shift in his bed to face remus who was staring back at him.

"where were you?" remus asked

"in the library" sirius said simply, avoiding any sarcasm or any joking around. remus face wore a surprised expression.

"oh- by your own will?" he said with a breathy laugh.

"yea" sirius replied

"what were you reading?" said remus, sounding excited. sirius didnt exactly know why he wad being interrogated by remus about his absence.

"um, i was just doing homework"

"oh, thats actually nice pads" remus smiled. sirius' stomach did another flip at the nickname. god this was so awkward and tense, sirius thought.

"sirius are you mad at me?" remus said, going straight to the point. every muscle in sirius' body went tense and completely still.

"no" sirius said bluntly.

"sure?"

"yea"

"okay. great then. um do you wanna come lay here with me?" remus offered, this was quiet foreign for remus as it was never him who initiated anything sexual or intimate. but he was willing to go out of his comfort zone for sirius. just for sirius.

"uh- sorry moony im really tired" it pained sirius to say these words, if he was being honest, he wanted nothing more than to lay in remus' chest right now and give him soft pecks and kiss his stupid plump lips.

"oh, okay" remus said lowly. "okay then" sirius wasnt sure what he meant by that tone, and before sirius has any other second to think about it, he felt his bed dip slightly and remus climbing on him, placing himself on top of sirius with his legs wide opened around his waist. sirius felt like all the oxygen in the world had escaped his lungs.

"tired, you said you are pads? want a little massage?" remus cooed softly. he leaned down on sirius' chest undoing his pyjama buttons revealing his tattooed chest.

"remus-" sirius tried to stop him. sirius promised himself he wasnt going to do anything like that with remus because he doesnt want to make him uncomfortable or possibly hate him more, however, this is different. its remus thats initiating it. it remus that did it.

"what pads?" remus continued cooing softly, completely stripping sirius of his shirt and attaching his lips on sirius' neck. at this exact moment, sirius moaned louder than he intended. he shifted slightly in his bed and put his hand through remus' hair. remus continued nibbling sirius' neck. he bit and licked at all the right spots, leaving a soft trail of kisses all over his neck and made his way up to his chin and on his lips, where he left a soft peck. sirius however pulled remus' head back towards him to kiss him properly, remus licked sirius' bottom lip which made sirius moan approvingly into the kiss. remus slipped his tongue in sirius' mouth and deepened the kiss, he felt sirius' hand wandering around his shoulder and slipped in his shirt to touch his bare skin.

"god this is so" remus moaned breaking the kiss only to attach his lips on his once again.

"remus-" sirius stopped him abruptly. remus looked down on sirius, his eyes mobing fast between his godly features, furrowing his brows slightly not understanding why sirius stopped him. did he make him uncomfortable? was sirius really not in the mood and remus overstepped a boundry? remus felt a horrible tingling feeling in his stomach as his brain raced between all the possibilities.

"remus im sorry- i cant do this" sirius said, as soon as the words left his mouth he felt horrible, reading the shocked and bewildered expression on remus face, he looked very hurt and unsure of himself.

"oh- fuck okay im sorry" remus said quickly, getting off sirius and leaving his bed, but sirius held his arm to immobilize him and not make him leave. they stared at each other for a few seconds that felt painfully long. both of them felt confused, upset with themselves and unsure of what to do or say next.

"can you please stay" sirius said quietly avoiding remus' eye. remus didnt respond which made sirius feel a horrible pit of nerves in his stomach.

"i- i don't understand. you just asked me to stop and told me you cant do this" remus spoke lowly with a soft rasp in his voice. sirius buried his head in his hand, he was on the brink of tears, he honestly didnt know what or how to explain his confusion to remus. how could he explain it or put it in cohesive words when he himself didn't understand.

"sirius please talk to me" remus said softly, holding sirius' hand

"rem i dont know how-"

"do you trust me?" remus cut him off.

"what- yes of course" sirius said sternly.

"then please tell me how you feel"

"how i feel about what?" sirius asked

"about doing this" remus tried to explain, sirius knew at once he was referring to all the sexual stuff they do.

"remus i love it. i enjoy it a lot, i sometimes just want the day to end only to get in bed with you. i- i dont know how to word my feelings because it's honestly just all a mess inside me" sirius spilled. this was the most he'd spoken all day. remus smiled at the last sentence. "what about you?" sirius asked, feeling the same horrible pit of nerves in his stomach increase. remus however smiled.

"i do things for you pads that id never do to anyone" he said, smiling more. he leaned closer to sirius' face and brushing a few strands of his hair out of his face. "but, if you feel unsure about this, we can stop and just be friends. i'd completely understand"

"no what the fuck moony" sirius said before he could stop himself, remus looked in his eyes. "no im unsure about your feelings to me, not about my feelings to you" he tried to explain.

"you think i dont like you?" remus asked quickly.

"well not exactly but im not sure how you feel towards me". at this, remus leaned down to kiss sirius lips a soft and tender kiss. he took his time to savor every bit of his mouth he could.

"maybe this would give you a good idea about how i feel about you" he smiled at him. "we're both exhausted, its best if we just go to sleep"

"right okay. can you sleep with me?" sirius asked, remus gave a breathy laugh at his sweet request.

"yes darling i can" he said with his usual rasp apparent, getting under the blanket and spooning sirius playing with his hair for the the next foreseeable hours until both of them were sleeping.

soft sun rays illuminated through the window of the gryffindor tower and on the entire hogwarts grounds. the translucent curtains that were in the dormitory were not doing any shielding from the sun rays whatsoever. it fell gently on the two boys that were sleeping together, tangled together, their bodies almost intertwining so perfectly with each other as if they were jigsaw pieces. sirius' head was on remus' chest, remus hugging sirius' body towards him and their legs just tangled. they looked so peaceful, their chests raising and going down every couple of seconds, it was all so perfect that one could confidently bet that even their heartbeats were in sync.

an owl came knocking its beak on the window above the bed theyre on, breaking the gentle yet majestically peaceful the state they were in. sirius shifted slightly in his sleep, opening his eyes to find uninvited sunlight penetrating right through his eyeballs. the owl made another knock on the window trying to grab their attention.

"fine okay" sirius said rasply, he got up sitting upright opening the window for that stupid owl that interrupted his sleep. the owl had two parcels tied on its leg. sirius untied them and the owl flew out at once.

"whos that from?" a raspy voice spoke he immediately knew it was remus.

"um, i think its" he turned the parcel around to see if there was any name, he smiled when he saw the senders name.

"yep, its from prongs" he said looking at remus who also smiled warmly.

"well, we'll open it later, lets just get up quickly now before we miss breakfast" he said, sitting up right and sliding his legs out of the bed. the two boys changed into their normal clothes. remus got into a hand knitted sweater and pants, sirius also got into a baggy sweatshirt and sloppily tied his hair up.

"pads is that mine?" remus smiled looking at the sweater sirius was wearing.

"maybe" sirius replied with a cheeky tone.

"course it is" remus rolled his eyes. "you literally have the biggest closet out of all of us, yet youre never wearing your shit" sirius gave him a weird look.

"not that i mind it darling" remus said softly, playing with sirius' hair slightly. they both left the dormitory and walked down to the common room with the intention to leave to the great hall, however they were met by a small table that was put in front of the fireplace with breakfast food laying on it. they looked at each other exchanging weird looks.

"there was no point of making you leave the common room only to go down and eat when its only you too in the whole school" professor mcgonagall's voice spoke. she was sitting on an armchair wearing her usual green dressing gown. "well anyway, im going down to have breakfast with the rest of the teachers. you two have a merry christmas" she smiled slightly and left the common room.

remus and sirius were just left there standing stupidly in front of the food table.

"well, i guess we're not leaving. sit down lets eat im starving" sirius said sitting himself down and starting to eat toast. they both ate until they were full and just laid on their armchairs to take their breath.

"wanna open the parcel prongs sent?" remus asked after ten minutes of silence.

"uhh sure" sirius said, getting the parcels, handing remus one box and he opened the other one. he tore the wrapping and opened it, a smile breaking on his face.

"he got me a wand polishing set. oh and look, he got me some hair bands" remus laughed a little. sirius put the hair bands in his wrist.

"what are you laughing at, i love it" sirius smiled "what did he get you?"

"he got me part six of 'crows or crowns'. its my favorite book and he knows i couldn't find that volume anywhere" remus' face wore a very big smile from that present. "oh and look! he got me a vest, it's beautiful"

"i'll be wearing that" sirius said at once

"of course darling you can wear it whenever"

"remus open my gift!" sirius said with so much excitement, remus held the huge box wondering what he has inside. he stared at sirius before opening it, unsure of what will meet him when he opens it. his suspicion grew larger when he was met by a cheeky smiling sirius.

"its not gonna blow up in my face right?" remus laughed a little

"only one way to find out" sirius shrugged

"oh god" remus joked. he opened the box and the first thing he saw was a big box inside labeled 'book polishing kit' remus' face fell with shock.

"sirius! sirius is this a book polishing kit? oh my god" he was gasping. sirius felt his cheeks burn by the fond expression on remus' face.

"holy shit pads where did you get this, these are so rare and expensive" he held it close to his face examining it with so much excitement.

"shhh its a gift" sirius was kind of embarrassed fora reason he doesnt know. "theres more stuff"

remus looked inside the box and laughed out loudly when he saw at least a doesnt bars of chocolate.

"what are you laughing at! this is the muggle chocolate you told me you like" sirius said flustered a little.

"yes yes i love it" remus smiled. "thank you"

sirius shrugged, not knowing what to say in situations like this.

"um, right open my gift" remus said looking nervous. remus' gift was something a little different and not very expected, he spent a lot of time thinking whether its a good idea or not. hes so nervous for sirius to see it, he felt his stomach lurch so badly he might vomit. he handed sirius an a4 piece of parchment that was folded into quarters. sirius gave him a confused yet excited look.

"are you giving me your transfiguration homework as a christmas gift moony" he joked.

"oh shut up and open it" every fibre in remus' body was screaming in anticipation and nerves. sirius unfolded the paper and read:

"dear sirius,

i am writing this in the dormitory for the fifteenth time at least. i thought so much about this and decided that its perfect. six years ago when i laid eyes on you for the first time, you had this aura that carried so much charm, something about your stupid gorgeous personality was so seductive and made me in complete lust for you. there aren't enough words in the english language to explain how you make me feel, nothing will come close to describing how i feel when you slip in bed with me every night, when i play with your hair, when i hear your heartbeats, when i hold your hand and stroke it with my thumb, when you kiss my scars, when you sit next to me in class sit there looking pretty doing nothing. i came to the conclusion that every little thing you do has me in utter awe. no one has ever made me feel like that, for a long time i was so confused as to why and how you could do that so effortlessly. i was confused about how i felt about you for so long, i was so confused about myself, and you helped me come to terms with who i am, by being so unapologetically you. at the end of a hard day you're always there to cheer me up, even in my darkest days, when nothing felt like it'll be okay ever again, you're always fucking here to change that. the number of times you've saved my life sirius, i couldnt tell you, by just merely being here. i figured that no matter what happens and no matter where life takes me, i want to always be with you. i never want to see that day i have to depart you, i dont ever see it coming because not even the strongest force from the gods above will make me leave you. im in love with you. im so fucking in love you idiot. im in love with the way you talk, the way you tie your hair, the way you dress, the way your eyes crease when you smile, your bark like laugh, your stupid jokes that i find funny unironically, your chirped nail polish... just in love with you. so sirius, this is me asking, do you want to be my boyfriend?"

sirius read the letters at least three times to make sure he wasnt missing anything, to make sure he was reading it correctly. was remus asking him out? was remus actually in love with him? none of this felt real. sirius felt like he's seeing stars in his vision, like he was going to pass out any second right now. he looked up at remus who was staring attentively on him and watching his every reaction. he met eyes with him and felt like all the worlds oxygen was being drained.

"so?" remus asked, his voice quivering.

"so?" he repeated as if this was a incredulous thing so say, " fuck yes i wanna be your boyfriend" sirius threw himself on remus on his armchair and splattered him with kissed everywhere he could reach.

"i never thought id be the lucky person to actually end up dating you" sirius breathed

"please, im the lucky one here" remus rolled his eyes.

"i mean hell yeah you are" sirius said sarcastically.

the pair of them spent the rest of the day sitting on the armchair cuddled up with the heat of each other, sharing soft intimate touches every now and then. they spent the whole day in peace and delicacy and made the most out of each other’s company. soon enough before they knew it, the holidays were over and students were returning to hogwarts for their second term.

“hi remus! hey sirius, good holiday? how are you two?” james showered them with questions enthusiastically when they saw him come in the gryffindor common room, he seemed to be in a cheerful mood.

“yea, great holiday” remus mumbled finding himself an armchair and sitting in it. the rest followed and sat on armchairs around him but sirius sat on his lap which remus scooted over a little to make space for him. james and lily looked at each other rolling their eyes playfully but happy that theyre on good terms, unlike the last time they saw them.

“what about you two? and you wormy? how was ur holiday” remus asked calmly, playing with sirius’ hair absentmindedly.

“great we had a great a time, i invited lily and wormy over, wormy couldnt make it though. but lily and i had fun, my parents liked her a lot” james smirked looking at her. “obviously they knew her because i always talked about her to them, but they’ve never really- woah WOAH” james’ speach was cut abruptly when he saw sirius attach his lips to remus’ and remus kissed him back fondly. they all exchanged shocked looks but they werent too shocked, they knew something was happening between the pair of them.

“woah guys” james laughed as they broke the kiss apart and giggled at their reaction.

“yea um, remus and i are dating” sirius said, lookinh flustered slightly. remus was still playing with his hair softly.

“does that mea we can go on double dates?” james said at once

“james potter i am not going on double dates with you and sirius thank you very much” lily said sarcastically.

“suit yourself, james and i are going on dates” sirius shrugged

“james and you are what-“ lily looked confused but cant help a laugh.

“thats right evans” sirius said in a dignified tone.

“dont you talk to my girlfriend like that black!” remus said at once. they all laughed at the sitiuation but lily said with a serious voice, “guys im so happy for you, youre finally together” she smiled wamrly. remus and sirius scooted closer next to each other smiling back at her.

“really proud of my mates” james said, trying to keep a serious tone but smirking at the same time.

[overwhore-s]

A Freak in a Sheet (Ghost!Bakugou x Reader) part 1

part II

This is 1347 words and I wrote it all in under an hour. I am both proud of myself for writing so fast but also kinda mad ‘cause I know I made some typos ‘n shit but am too lazy to read after myself so aaah...if you find anything PLEASE let me now I will thank you very nicely <3 

Anyways have some ghost Bakugo. Where I am right now, it is the day before Halloween. I’ll try to post the second (smutty) part tomorrow. if you want to, please also support this on AO3. Love you lots, please enjoy <3 

warnings: some swearing. also brief mentions of depression. 

Get lost, motherfucker, reads the lovely message scrawled on your bathroom mirror. Now, you’re no expert on the psychology of writing, but you’re almost certain the author is angry with you. He’s such a big personality too, with those big, bold letters. And he wrote it in…blood? Experimentally, you dip your pinky in the red substance and then put it in your mouth. You grimace.

Chili sauce.

“Listen, friend,” you start, mentally preparing yourself for the oncoming onslaught of ghastly apparitions and cupboards flying open. Ghosts are annoying like that.

“I’m not here to cause you any sort of harm, believe it or not.”

The lightbulb above your head flickers aggressively, as if in disbelief at your words.

“Woah, you doubting me buddy? I’m telling the truth, I swear!” You lay your hand over your heart as you say that, hoping the ghost will see it as a guarantee.

No such luck. The cabinet door suddenly opens, hitting you painfully in the knee. You cry out and start hopping around on your unhurt leg, all the while swearing like a sailor.

“Ow! Fuck this! I’ve just about had it with you! I’m done being nice, you stupid fucking ghost! I’m going all Ghostbusters on your ass!” You threaten, before kicking the cabinet closed and shamefully limping away.

Bakugou materializes leaning against your bathtub, a self-satisfied smirk pulling at his lips. You’ll be out before the week is out, he’s certain of it.

                                            •─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

Despite his best efforts, a week passes and you still remain, as stubborn as ever. It’s more than a week now, actually, closer to six months, but time tends to flow funny when you’re a ghost. He’s lost count of how many lightbulbs fell victim to his explosions, how many times you tried to capture him in a ring of salt. You seem to know an awful lot about ghosts – most likely you’ve met others before at some point in your life, considering you’re not even a little scared of him.

If anything, you’re…curious. When you’re not busy shielding yourself from flying objects or relighting the candles he continues to snuff out, you ask him stuff, and it’s annoying, and he hates how he sometimes gets the urge to give an honest answer.

You never ask about traumatic shit like his death or why he chooses to remain on Earth instead of passing to the next world. You want to know about whether he was a college student as well, if so, what was his major, what music he likes, if he’s a dog person or a cat person. When you’re watching TV and something makes you laugh, you point at the screen showing some stupid game show and yell: “Do you see this? What a dumbass!” He can’t help himself but agree, because the guy is indeed a dumbass for answering an easy question like that wrong, and it is pretty fucking funny if he does say so himself.

You talk about yourself too. When you come home from school for example, you tell him about your day. The first few times it happens, he keeps rattling pots and pans to disrupt your speaking, but you barely let it affect you, continuing in a cheerful tone despite the obnoxious noise.

He soon finds he likes the sound of your voice, no matter how hard he tries to deny it. Before you came in it, his life after death was quiet, depressive and mundane. Now it’s hardly peaceful, but you brought change, and light, and laughter…he never realized what he was missing.

Until you happened.

He listens to you even when you’re at your lowest, sharing your insecurities and fears with him like he’s a most trusted friend. He hates how the sight of you, shaking with sobs when the world gets the best of you, makes his chest feel all sorts of tight and his head spin with anger at whoever caused you to be like this.

It’s mostly at times like these that he wants to reveal himself to you, gather you up in his arms and hold you close to his chest. Would you feel it? Would you get grossed out, push him away? There’s too many variables, and he’s still just coming to terms with his affection for you.

So he chickens out.

You have average days as well. When nothing amazing has happened at school or work, or you’re too tired to want to talk about it. You take a long shower, enjoy your meal in silence and head straight to bed.

Bakugou feels weird watching you sleep, so he doesn’t. He hangs around the kitchen instead, cleaning the dishes you were too beat to take care of before sleep. Sometimes he watches TV, the same shows you like, but it’s not half as entertaining when you’re not there to keep him company.

It’s so fucking strange, he thinks, so unlike me.

When exactly did he stop seeing you as an annoyance and started considering you a friend?

                                                 •─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

He doesn’t know how exactly it happened. It’s like his body – his weird, unearthly, ghost body – moved on its own. One moment you’re standing up on a chair in order to reach that bag of chips he purposefully moved out of your reach because he knows how much you like saving them for a show and it doesn’t start for another thirty minutes – the other you’re falling, and he thinks, shit, that’s all my fault, isn’t it?

And so he catches you. His solid arms encircle your waist and your back hits his chest and you’re warm and alive and it feels wonderful.

He hears you gasp, not in fear, just surprise, and he wonders if you knew he was in the kitchen with you the whole time.

“Thanks for that,” you say, knees wobbly as he lets go of you.

“You’re welcome,” he grumbles and the words are out before he can stop them. Yep. He did it. After months of playing the mute, he finally broke his silence.

“I knew you could speak,” you say, triumphantly. You’re still not turning around though, and Bakugou thinks it might be because you’re scared of what he looks like. It’s not that bad. Who’s he kidding, it’s great, actually. He never was one to deny the obvious – unless it hurt his pride too much – and so he can admit to himself that he’s an attractive guy…or at the very least, the people who knew him when he was alive considered him attractive.

“Can I look at you?” You ask suddenly, carefully. Like you’re considering his feelings or some shit. It throws him off balance. Here was he, thinking you were shallow like the rest of them, and all along you’ve just wanted his consent.

When you don’t get an answer out of him right away, you panic. “Like – you don’t have to. I know some deceased don’t like showing their faces. It was nice enough of you to show me your arms though – you have nice arms – but like…I’m going to the living room. You can dematerialize. Let’s watch some TV.”

No. He doesn’t want to do all that…dematerialized, he realizes. “You can look,” he blurts out quickly. If there was any doubt that he liked you before, now there’s none.

“Are you sure?” You ask once again, this time trying his goddamn patience.

“Fuck’s sake.” He grabs you by the arms – how heavenly it is to touch something living for a change – and forcibly turns you around.

You look at him, the first person to see him in…in too many years, and as your eyes fill with amazement and wonder, he knows it was worth it to wait for so long to show himself after all.

“What’s your name?” You ask, softly, and his throat feels tight as he responds.

“Bakugou.” He doesn’t ask for yours. He’s known it for a long time now.

You grab his hand and squeeze, warm, human, alive, perfect. “Very well then. Want to watch a reality show with me, Bakugou?”

[robbyrobinson]

VILLAIN REVIEW: KING ANDRIAS (AMPHIBIA)

Voiced by: Keith David

First Appearance: Marcy at the Gates

Admittedly, Amphibia didn't instantly hook me in ways that Gravity Falls or the Owl House had. The first season was okay what with the worldbuilding and stuff. But Season 2 definitely improved especially because of this guy.

BIOGRAPHY

Thousands of years ago, he was the ruler of Newtopia who was in charge of the Calamity Box, an interdimensional device that could allow people to travel to other worlds. From there, he claimed that his ancestors were peaceful explorers who used the box to communicate. One day, the box was stolen with him believing his two former friends betrayed him. From there, Newtopia lost a bit of its greatness....

At least until the day Anne Boonchuy, Marcy Wu, and Sasha Waybright inadvertently end up in Amphibia after Anne is peer pressured into stealing the box from an antique store. From there, in his own words, the game could finally begin.

PERSONALITY

Keith David does a brilliant job portraying the king of Amphibia. At first glance, Andrias comes off as being a jovial, childish monarch who comes across as a "kewl grandpa", not spelled "cool," but "K-E-W-L." He comes off as delighted with helping Anne and the girls find a way back home...maybe a bit too eager. Honestly, the first time that I have seen him, I already mentally worked it out that he would be a bad guy because a lot of those kings in cartoons turn out as such. Not to say that it really takes away from the overall performance, it is just kind of obvious.

Yet, there are several subtle hints of his true nature just at the surface such as when he and Marcy conduct research on the Calamity Box and find a secret passageway that he "did not know about." If you notice, he has a smug smile across his face before joining Marcy in the passage.

But it's once his true colors are exposed where he truly shines. To make it short and simple, Andrias is evil. Purely and simply evil. So far, he has all the cards as likely becoming one of the most evil of the Disney animated television shows, possibly competing with the heavier hitters like Lunaris, Bulba, or Bill freaking Cipher.

He is ruthless: he wants to rule over all worlds with an iron fist and will absolutely NOT let anything come in between him and his schemes. He can kill a sapient robot without batting an eye and then the next moment smoothly try to batter a baby frog with his fist. If you have a best friend, he'd think nothing of dangling them over a window and threaten to drop them if his demands are not met. And then do so anyway because he is a dick.

Make no mistakes: Andrias passes the criteria for a sociopath with glowing colors. He is manipulative. He puts on the superficial charm of a grandfather-like figure while secretly stringing people along and manipulating them like chess pieces. What he does to Marcy is the dickish cherry on top of the douchebag sundae. He exploits a 13-year-old's desperation of wanting to stay with her two best friends and pretends to empathize with her even offering her a deal that he knew was like sweet nectar to her: when he invades other worlds, she and her friends will travel the worlds together having several amazing adventures.

He lacks empathy or emotional attachments. Already you have some people going off the trailer for season 3 saying that Andrias definitely was fond of Marcy because she was shown in a rejuvenation machine. Sure, I can totally see where people are coming from. I mean, it's not like it was his own fault for putting her there to begin with. That's a crazy thought. In all seriousness, he only sees Marcy as a pawn in his schemes and his only response to stabbing her is an irritated "Now look what you made me do." Way to blame the victim for your own acts, Andrias.

He had two friends thousands of years ago that even now it is apparent he holds resentment towards them for "betraying" him. Him deciding to drop Sprig was him basically wanting Anne to go through the same pain he felt when he was "wronged." But that does nothing to EXPLAIN why he is such a sociopathic megalomaniac. If anything, how the episode plays it off is that his "friends" betrayed him because he was a psychotic salamander with delusions of grandeur. Given how much of a bully he was once he was revealed to be evil, I am really wondering if that could have also played into it. But it looks like the show is doing this to make Andrias more of a foil for Anne and her two friends.

And, currently, he has absolutely no remorse for any of his actions. He giddily reveals Marcy's secret that she was the one who deliberately stranded herself and her friends in Amphibia in the first place even when he knew that she told him that in confidence. He then mockingly apologizes for "spilling the tea."

And what is a sociopath if not egotistical? Andrias believes that he alone should rule over not just Amphibia, but the Earth, and other worlds. He doesn't care whether or not people will bow to his rule as the tapestry itself shows. He is standing over a pile of bones making it very explicit what his invasions will result in should Anne and her team fail to stop him.

But I will not deny that he is a scarily competent threat who doesn't mess around.

ABILITIES

He has lived for 1,000+ years. It is not confirmed if it has to do with the particular breed of salamander he is, or if his longevity comes in part due to his 13-eyed master whom he is helping accomplish this "revenge" by subverting a prophecy having to do with the three human girls.

Besides his manipulation and charisma, Andrias is a competent fighter. Despite being colossal and a bit on the chunky side, he is surprisingly agile and wields a flaming sword. He is also insanely stout. Even when Anne goes Super Saiyan mode on his ass, he could still hold his ground with the use of his shield.

He also has knowledge over machinery and can command his robo-frog army with ease.

FINAL SCORE

Biography: 6

Personality:

Abilities: 7

Overall: 7/10

[internalsealpanic]

The Thorn pt.1

summary: “Please what, Kitten? I can’t give you what you want if you don’t tell me.”

 or my 6 thousand word essay on why I want more Sugar daddy!Slade fics.

a/n: This is just straight up smut Never combine stress thirst plus an amazing enabler. Thanks to @littleredwing89 for basically co-writing. Also I need more case fics with undercover gentlemen’s clubs stuff.  I will edit this for grammar later. 

warnings: mentions of murder and sexual assault (for the case), mirror sex, collars, oral (male receiving), choking, kind of public sex?, size kink (this is to be expected at this point), strength kink,  reader is kind of a dumbass, and praise kink. 

villain’s masterlist or masterlist

Saying this wasn’t your scene would be like saying the sun is bright. Obvious but wholly inadequate in describing just how out of your depth you are. You cross your arms over your chest in a futile attempt to shield them from prying eyes. The soft fabric of your lingerie feeling too little in contrast to the men clad in expensive suits leering at you as they passed your skittish form.

 You try to swallow down the nervousness. You try to tell yourself this is fine, that it’s just for the case. But the silk collar tied tightly around your neck and your own fraying nerves made it extremely difficult to ignore just how vulnerable you felt. 

 God, what made your awkward ass think you could pull this off?

 You lift your head, eyeing the other men and women around you. You all wore matching silk ribbons tied into bows behind your neck, a circular, silver tag hanging off of it. You wrinkle your nose at how young some of them look. Some barely look old enough to be anywhere near a place like this. 

 Part of you feels thankful that you shut Nicky’s idea down to go with a leather lingerie set but the stark contrast of your lacy lingerie set made you stand out too much in the sea of leather. It made you stand out just enough to color both your cheeks and ears from the amount of attention you were getting. You close your eyes trying to ignore the heat permeating from your skin. You try to focus on the details of the case. 

 For the last 8 months, there’s been an increase in the number of young men and women going missing and turning up dead. The assumption had been that it was due to the increase in gang activity but something felt off about the deaths. 

 Nothing was consistent. The victim type, the area, and even the M.O. of sexual assault were varied. Only the mode of death was even close to being consistent but even that presented its own problems. The injuries were too clean, too efficient for the killer to have drawn any pleasure from it especially when contrasted with the victims’ other injuries.  Normally people who make those injuries have a certain type and a certain way of doing things. And the clean efficiency of the disposal method had easily ruled out any of the local gangs. 

 When you brought all of this up to your boss, he waved you off saying something about looking into it. Somehow not getting fired after screaming at your boss (probably because you’re one of the few crime scene techs willing to stay in this shithole), you decide to conduct your own investigation. The more clues you uncovered (out of sheer spite) the more they seemed to point to an organized crime group, likely involved in trafficking.

 Finally, after a month and a half of searching, you found a solid lead. Augustus Klineberg. Despite the name, he was new money. At least, here in Merit.  

 “I’m his type!”

 “And so are a dozen bodies laying around in the lab, what’s your point?”

 “Sita, got me a part-time job at the Thorn.”

 It hadn’t been easy. The thorn was an exclusive gentlemen’s club that specialized in certain kinks. It had taken Sita a week to even get you an interview but after that they eagerly accepted you with worrying enthusiasm. Either way, this conversation was simply a formality. 

 Bernard stares at you and you watch as his entire being crumples into the dining room table. He turns to his husband pleadingly. “Nicky, Please, my love, talk some sense into her.”

 You turn to Nicky who is innocently sipping from his coffee mug filled with whatever ungodly creation came to Bernard in the dead of night. He tilts his head back seemingly collecting the right words. “Y/n has a point.”

 “No! Not you too!”

 “Yes!”

 “Bern, think about it. Klineberg would never suspect her and unlike most of Klineberg’s victims, Y/n is a ninja gremlin.”

 Bernard gives him a withering look while you snort. Nicky shrugs and continues to drink his, what you assumed was, liquid crack. 

 “Y/n, are you sure about this? The Thorn- Well, it isn’t exactly like your other undercover jobs.” You give both of them a cocky smile, biting into your mini waffle. “It can’t be that hard. All I have to do is sit there and look pretty.” At that little remark, Nicky burst out into a fit of laughter loud enough to wake the neighbors. 

You run your hand through your hair still, feeling flustered. You need air. 

 “Hey Nina, I’m gonna need like maybe 5 minutes.”

 “Sure, just don’t blame me for whatever excuse I give the bossman,” Nina says, shrugging at you. She flips her red curls over her shoulder, winking at a patron and tilting her hips to show off her curves. Both you and the patron are slack-jawed and entranced. Maybe you should try that sometime? Some time being after you stop gawking at Nina’s ass and probably also after you take in some air. 

 You shuffle away awkwardly keeping your eyes to the ground. You shrink into yourself easily as you cut through the crowd. This case was going to be the death of you and Bernard’s eulogy would just be a very short but satisfying ‘I told you so’. 

 Mercifully, you find a quieter area. You would have preferred to go outside but standing alone in a dark alley in skimpy underwear might be a bad idea. You flatten yourself against a wall and close your eyes. Maybe you could tell them you aren’t feeling well which isn’t entirely untrue. You felt sick being this vulnerable. You should probably leave before you do something stupid. 

 A hand on your wrist drags you back to reality. It takes absolutely everything in you not to break his wrist. You open your eyes to see Klineberg hoovering in your personal space. 

 “Are you ok?” He asks, the concern in his voice sounding synthetic. You try to wriggle out of his hold not bothering to hide your discomfort. You note how his smile seems to get bigger as you struggled more. Clearly, he was enjoying your discomfort. 

   “Thanks for finding her for me. The manager said she’d be in this general area but it’s quite hard to see with just one eye.” Slade says casually, settling a large hand on the man’s shoulder. Your heart stops. Of all the people you had to run into-

  Klineberg eyes him skeptically. You have to respect him for that. You’ve faced Slade several times before, only making it out due to luck or hours of planning. If you were Klineberg, you’d be pissing yourself. Despite the almost friendly expression Slade had on him, you can tell this wasn’t up for negotiation. And apparently, so can Klineberg seeing how he dropped your hand. 

 Slade waves a neatly dressed man over. The man eyes you appraisingly and your heart takes an express elevator to your throat. Were you that obviously out of place? 

 “We’ll be taking a room.”

 “Of course, sir,” The man answers politely, finally, taking his eyes off of you and handing Slade a key. 

 Wait. We?

 Slade starts walking without a word, the crowd parting for him easily.  You briefly look back at Klineberg who is still looking at you like he’s going to tear you apart with his bare hands before following Slade.  

 You walk behind him wordlessly. Your mind is still reeling from the fact that Slade ‘Deathstroke: The Terminator’ Wilson just saved you from your target and your own terrible acting and is mortified by the fact that he has now seen you in skimpy lingerie. The steps you take are measured, making sure to stick close to him but not too close.  You keep your eyes to the ground as you walk behind him, hoping it’s enough to hide the expressions cycling through your face. 

 You two enter a room. It was unexpectedly spacious even under the dim neon lights. You look around finding the room furnished with expensive decorations looking nothing like the seedy gentlemen’s clubs you’ve busted before save for the pole in the middle of the room. It looked more akin to an expensive hotel bar, again, save for the pole. The darkness of the room and the quiet flow of the music set quite the intimate atmosphere which just made you that more skittish. 

 Slade makes his way across the room, eyes searching the corners and spaces of the room. He nods seemingly satisfied with the setup and likely not spotting any recording devices. Your stiff shoulders loosen a bit, if nothing else you could at least speak plainly now. 

 Slade takes his suit jacket off, revealing broad shoulders and the outline of strong back muscles. Your throat dries. Something warm stirs in you and you’re gawking again. God, you really need a better reaction to attractive people. 

 Slade holds out a glass of whiskey to you, a playful smile on his handsome face. He doesn’t seem to mind you staring at him. You swear viciously not skimping on colorful words but walk over to take the alcohol regardless. It’s on his tab and you honestly needed some alcohol in your system if you’re going to talk to him.

 “So, working for the cops not work out for you?”

 “Nah, my last sugar daddy just kicked the bucket, so I’m looking for a new one,” you say, giving Slade a wry smile.  You watch him cross one leg over another easing into a relaxed position through the wall. It was polished to a mirror shine. You guess that’s the kind of thing rich people liked. 

 “Hmmm, that can be arranged.” You choke on your drink. You scowl at him. He simply shrugs at you taking a sip of his whiskey. 

 You hear the door open, forcing you to pretend to be civil. A man around your age, dressed in a classic waiter’s outfit comes in with a tray of whiskey and two glasses. You don’t know how but you can tell the whiskey is worth more than your apartment. This doesn’t help your urge to punch Slade. 

“Will you be requiring any special toys tonight, sir?” The straightforward tone of the question makes you stiffen more than anything. The man’s eyes flicker towards you but his focus remains squarely on Slade who eyes you openly before smiling and saying “No, thanks, Anthony. I think we’ll be just fine.”

 "If you say so, sir. Please feel free to let us know if you need anything." 

 You wait for Anthony to leave before turning the full force of your scowl at Slade.“How the hell did you know his name?”

 Slade regards you impassively over the rim of his glass. You refuse to break eye contact.  He raises his hands in mock surrender.  “Alright, Kitten, you caught me. I do frequent this club quite a bit.”

 “You kinky shit.”

 He eyes you again, his eye clearly tracing your curves. “I’m not the one sitting here in their underwear with a collar on. Speaking of which-” Slade nods his head towards something in front of both of you. 

 You look at the pole, blinking dumbly as a smile spreads across his face. He tips his head to it. “I did pay for your time and the customer is always right.”

 Your mouth twists into a snarl as the tips of your ears run red. “You are insufferable.”

 “Don’t make me call the manager.” You sigh at the unspoken ‘it is definitely going to blow your cover and get you shot. At best.’ and begrudgingly you make your way to the pole. 

 You grip the pole in front of you, flexing your fingers against the cold metal. Anxiety thrums under your skin. Your eyes flick nervously to Slade who’s got the audacity to sit comfortably, sip whiskey, and smirk at you as if he was completely in his element. 

 “No need to be shy. Be a good girl and give us a good show,” he says, winking at you. Your hackles rise and your face pulls into a frown before rearranging itself into a sultry smile. You put one heel in front of you, hooking your leg around the pole and grinding your clothed sex into the metal in an undulating motion that has Slade clenching his hand around his glass. You try your hardest to grin and you suspect you’ve failed. Not that Slade’s noticed considering his eye is laser-focused on your ass. 

 With your one leg on the floor, you push yourself into a spin. Your body tips back as your hand runs down your face, chest, and abdomen drawing attention to the plains of exposed skin and delicate fabric accenting your shape. Pulling your body back up, you let your body slide down to the floor. Your legs split as soon as you made contact with the floor giving him a full view of your ass. He whistles appreciatively, tilting his head. You watch him through thick lashes, eyes bright and predatory under the neon lights. You roll onto your hand and knees. He smiles down at you watching the sweat drip down the valley of your breasts.  You were a sight to behold. 

 Slade pats his knee. “Come here, kitten.” Hunger flashes in his blue eye. It sends a warm shock through your system. It’s odd being looked at like that but you can’t feel yourself getting too concerned over it. Not when it sends a pleasant hum through your mind. 

 You crawl towards him in time with the movement, slow and steady in its place. Stopping in front of him. A large hand grasps your chin, thumb brushing against your bottom lip.  

 You sit on his lap, hand grasping his broad shoulder. Embarrassment floods back into your system now that you’re this close, now that you had the full force of that hungry gaze on you. You feel your skin heat and the weight of his gaze makes your stomach flip. 

 Seduction was other people’s gig, not yours. 

 Large hands settle on your waist, pressing circles into your skin. The buzzing feeling in your brain returns and you refocus on your task. His hands slide down the side of your body, fingers digging into your hips. His hands follow the circular motions your hips make on his crotch and guides you over the growing bulge. You hear his breath catch and hiss as you grind down on his crotch. You wrap your hands around the silk tie dangling from his neck and roughly pull him into a kiss.  

 His fingers dig into the meat of your ass drawing an embarrassingly loud yelp from you and giving him access to your mouth. You suck on his tongue and receive a pleased groan from him. Your tongues wrestle for control as he kneads your ass, making you mewl and moan into the kiss. You break the kiss needing air while Slade admires his work. 

 When Slade dips in for another kiss, you pull away pushing off of his broad chest a flirty smile dancing across your features. You turn from him, heels clicking against the floor as your show off the lushness of your figure.  In the mirror, you see Slade settling back into his position and grinning at the corners of the room again. His arms relax on the back of the couch. 

You close your eyes and let the music swallow you whole. You don’t dare hazard a glance at the mirror. You sashay your hips to the music, loosening your tense muscles. You open your eyes giving Slade your best seductive smile. You run your hands up your body, tangling into your hair. 

 You bite your lip as you slide them back down. Your fingers catch against the collar. Slade’s mouth twists.  

 You ease your arms out of your bra and let it drop to the floor. Your nipples pebble in the cold night air. The sight of them makes the corners of Slade’s mouth twitch. You push past the warmth stirring in your stomach in favor of trailing your hands down your body. Your fingers toy with the straps of your panties, watching as Slade licks his lips in anticipation.  You slide the flimsy garment down your legs, bending over and giving him a good view of your wet pussy through the mirror. 

 Stepping out of them, you toss them at Slade, who just to be an asshole, catches and pockets them. He grins at you and shrugs unapologetically. You scowl at him putting as much venom into your features as much as possible.      

You sway your lush hips in time with the music, letting the slow beat dictate the rhythm of your movements as you saunter towards him. You swallow, the silk collar still wound tightly around your neck. The intensity of his gaze makes you painfully aware of your nakedness but the embarrassment heating your skin shoots straight to your core, making you shudder. 

 Reaching him, you straddle his thighs, your plump ass grazing over his growing bulge. You moan, mouth-watering at the sensation. Your mind dwells on the feeling, your insides growing slick at the thought of him inside you. 

 Your fingers trail up your thighs and up over your stomach. You watch as his eye follows the slow tantalizing movement. His large hands grip onto the plush headrest of the couch, squeezing them as his face twists just a smidge with a mix of exertion and frustration. 

 You give him a playful smile as you slow the gyrating of your hips. A growl rumbles from his chest and you snap your hips back against his erection, the loose movement of your body hypnotic like ocean waves. Tipping your head back into his shoulder, exposing the column of your throat to him. Your hips continue to undulate against him, feeling the deep bass of the music ripple through your body along with the shockwaves of heat coming from your core as you grind it against his bulge. The coarse feeling of the fabric against your core making your knees grow weak.  

 A sinful moan tumbles out of your lips followed closely by breathy panting. You let your eyes slide shut soaking up the sensation of his suit against your skin. You reach behind you hooking your arms around Slade’s broad shoulders to steady yourself as your press closer to his large form. He presses his lips to your neck, the prickle of his beard against your skin making you shiver. “Yeah, just like that, kitten,” he murmurs against your skin, a large hand settling on your thigh.

 You push further into him. You grind your hips, the movement deep and slow. Your hand tangles in his hair, gently guiding him to your lips. Your lips move against each other just as your bodies do, slow and sensual. You catch his lips between your teeth, nipping at it. He chuckles at your invitation, sliding his tongue inside your mouth and joining your lips once again. Below you, you feel another large hand hook onto your thigh. Both hands grip your thighs fiercely pulling them further apart, exposing your sopping pussy to the cold night air. 

 Slade breaks away from your kiss, his panting breaths hot fanning your face. You stare at each other with half-lidded eyes, lust bright in them even in the low light. He captures your lips again in a quick kiss before planting one on your shoulder. “Play with yourself,” he says, the command steady and rough against your ear. 

 The tone of his voice makes you shiver as you reluctantly release your hold on his shoulders. Keeping one hand tangled in his hair, you slowly slide your hand down your body, mewling into his skin when you reach into your neglected folds. You slip two fingers in immediately. You shudder and bite your lips trying to stop any obscene sounds from escaping. 

 A hand tilts your chin, coaxing you. “Good girl, look at yourself. Look just how wet you are just for me, kitten,” Slade says, nibbling at your ear. You yelp, your hips bucking into your hand, ass rolling against his member. You watch yourself in the mirror red-faced, open-mouthed, and sinful. Your dripping sex is in full view only obscured by your hand as your fingers dip in and out of your core. Slade’s eye never leaves the mirror even as he plants kisses against your skin. His large hand grasps your neck making sure you don’t look away from the mirror. You think of how easily he could break you and you feel like you’re on fire. 

 You're so close.  You’re so so close. You can even see the desperation carving itself so plainly on your face. Anxiety and arousal mix into a potent cocktail in your gut. The nervousness from earlier rearing its ugly head. You whine in frustration, adding in a third finger but you can’t seem to reach over the edge. You hear him chuckle behind you and see him grin into your skin. At least, one of you was having fun. 

 He gives your shoulder another rough kiss, leaving a mark before speaking. “Having some trouble, kitten?” You wrinkle your nose at his tone but...in truth, you were. You bite your lip not knowing what to say. You’re so close but… the venue made you shy and that was an entirely different problem.  Using the hand on your neck, Slade tilts your head towards him, the heat from his lips ghosting over yours. “All you have to do is ask for help, kitten,” he murmurs against your lips. The vibrations send another shockwave of desperation wreaking havoc throughout your already oversensitive body. 

 He tilts your head back to look at the mirror. You can feel your ears warm at the thought of begging but you’re a hair’s breadth away from your end. Biting your lips and furrowing your brow, you take a steadying breath but it still comes out breathy when you exhale due to the hand squeezing your thigh drifting closer to your core. He presses slow circles into your inner thigh with his thumb, his teeth nibbling at your shoulder leaving marks. A vicious curse leaves your lips blunted by a moan that follows it. 

 “Slade, please. Please. Sir, please.”

 “Please what, Kitten? I can’t give you what you want if you don’t tell me.”

 You tighten your grip on his hair and roll your hips against his. He growls in your ear but he doesn’t budge. “Use your words, kitten,” he commands, sounding far more patient than he actually is. You whimper, rocking against him. He holds you still, fingers digging into your flesh and body leaning into yours. “Words.”

 You pant, hot breaths loud in your ears. Whether it was his or your own you were hearing, you didn’t know and didn’t care, not when your head was jumbled with the buzzing under your skin. You swallow. His eye following the movement of your throat and the silver glint of your tag winking at you in the mirror. “Slade- Sir, please- Please, I need you. I need you inside me.”

 “That wasn’t too hard now was it?” He says capturing your lips in a rough kiss. You scream against his lips when you feel two large calloused fingers thrust into your core, stretching you replacing the ache in your core with a burning stretch. Slade releases you, steadying you so that your eyes are once again on the mirror. You both watch as his fingers pump in and out of you, the room filling up with your moans. “Keep your eyes on the mirror and watch as I make you cum.”

 He presses his thumb against your clit. The syllables of his name coming out garbled and incoherent. You cum with a whimper. Your body shakes uncontrollably, your bones melting. Your lungs take in greedy gulps of oxygen feeling like the wind’s been knocked out of them. Slade lets your head lull back against his shoulder. You press little kisses against the powerful muscles of his neck. “Thank you, sir.”

 Slade removes his fingers from your pussy, leaving you feeling empty. “Clean up the mess you made,” he orders, pressing wet fingers against your lips. You open your mouth letting them in. You slide your eyes shut and swirl your tongue around them. You bob your head taking them in deep. You moan, rocking your hips against his still hard cock, letting yourself imagine what it would be like to take him into your mouth. Your enthusiasm earns you a hiss from Slade. You smile as you continue to suck on his fingers and rock your body, the fire in the pit of your stomach reigniting. You flutter your eyes open. In the mirror, you see Slade, brow raised and mouth wrangled into a shape of wry amusement. “See, I knew you were a good girl,” he says voice strained. You grind your ass into him as you moan around his fingers. You gasp when a rough hand grasps your breast, nipple pinched between calloused fingers. 

 “Are you that hungry for my cock, kitten?” he asks, removing his fingers from your lips. Both your lips and his fingers glisten with your saliva. You nod not trusting your voice to be steady. He thankfully accepts it.  

 “Well, have at it,” he says, hands repositioning themselves on the back of the couch easing into a more relaxed position and looking as smug as humanly possible. He really is getting his money’s worth out of this. You shift your body making sure you brush up against his erect member as you did so. He looks almost pained when you finally face him. You drag your hands up and down his shirt, his muscles barely hidden by the soft silky material. You lick your lips, catching your bottom lip between your teeth. You slide yourself down his body, hands kneading and worshipping every stretch of muscle they come across. Fuck, they feel so good to your touch. 

 Getting to your knees, you rest your cheek against his knee. You let mischief shape your features. He quirks his brow at you, tilting his strong jaw urging you to move on. You massage his thighs as you pull yourself up. You undo his belt tossing it to the side. You pinch the zipper of his pants between your teeth and pull it down, grinning as you do it. Slade lifts his hips a bit to help you ease his pants and boxers down. Your mouth waters visibly when his cock springs free in all its glory. You gulp audibly as you figure the logistics of fitting all of it into your mouth. 

 “Take your time, Kitten. I’ve requested you for the whole night. We have time.” He drawls, smug. You roll your eyes at him finally deciding that head-on was the only way to tackle this. You lick a strip up his member paying special attention to the large vein running down the middle. You flick your eyes up to him, seeing his muscles tense. You grasp the base of his cock tight in your hand, kissing the tip and giving the slit a long, languid lick. The taste of precum wakes your taste buds. You hum, sucking lightly at the head, your hand twisting up and down his cock. His jaw tightens, the strain of keeping his hips still tightening the muscles of his thighs. 

 You spread your legs wide as you sink your head down taking him in and giving him a good view of your wet pussy. You take him in as far as you can, gagging when the head of his cock hits the back of your throat. The corners of your eyes sting with tears. You still yourself, letting your throat relax around him. You pull yourself back up. Your plush lips massage his length as you go and your warm hand not trailing far behind. You keep your mouth on the head of his cock before sinking back down. His sheer girth is sure to make your jaw ache but you couldn’t make yourself care, not when you’re growing wetter the more you worship his cock. Slade for his part looked like he was gonna tear the couch apart every time you sank down to take is cock on, the fluttering walls of your throat driving him up the wall. The soft music of the room was now barely audible against the mingling sounds of your moans. Slade’s unrestrained voice was dripped with whiskey and sin. 

 His cock twitches in your throat and it’s the only warning you get before cum splashes against the back of your throat and fills your mouth. You choke but when your eyes meet his, the muscles of your throat work automatically to swallow his load. The movement followed closely by his eye. You pull back, light-headed. He grabs your chin, tilting it up to inspect your mouth. He hums satisfied.  “Kitten, that mouth of yours is definitely worth more than the price of admission.” He says brushing a thumb against your bottom lip as you pant. 

 A familiar ache in your core returns when your eyes land on Slade’s still hardened cock.  

 “Of course, a little cockslut like you wouldn’t be satisfied ‘til you’ve been filled,” he chuckles pulling you into his lap so that you’re facing the mirror, your dripping pussy hovering over his saliva covered cock. The throbbing head teasing against your sensitive folds. He kisses your shoulder, his teeth pinching your skin leaving another red bruise. You whine as he guides your hips, moving them to ever so slightly brush your core against his cock. 

 “Sir, please. I need you. I- I need you to fuck me,” you beg, hands tangling in his hair and eyes watching his member in pained hunger. You sound so needy but you also needed him inside you filling you up. 

 Slade hums in your ear approvingly. He pinches your ear lobe between his teeth, making you keen. “Well, since you asked so nicely.” That was the only warning you got before his hands guide your hips down onto his engorged cock. Your walls flutter with every inch, stretching you with every inch. A hand cups your breast while he continues to guide you down onto his cock. Rough calloused fingers knead your breast as he whispers compliments into your skin in between kisses. The cacophony of sensations is almost too much for you. 

 “Such a good cockslut, look at how well that tight cunt of yours is taking me in.” You roll your hips, urging him to quicken his maddeningly slow pace. He simply chuckles at your attempt as both his hands steady your hips. You almost cry in relief when he finally bottoms out. You pant savoring the burning stretch tearing at your insides. Pleasure and pain mingling in your sense.  

 Slade rests his chin against your shoulder, lips pressed to the shell of your ear. “Kitten, I want to watch you fuck yourself on my cock,” he says, in a low commanding tone making you shiver and leaving no room for arguments. You grip on to his arms, nails digging into the meat of his muscle, to steady yourself. You lean forward to get yourself into a better angle. 

 Ah ah ah

 Breathy moans and the slap of skin against skin filled the air as you roll your hips against his. You watch yourself in the mirror, breasts bouncing, mouth hanging open, and tongue lolling out getting lost in the pleasure. The mixture of shadow and light highlighting and isolating the frantic need carving itself onto both of your faces. The coil in your stomach twists as your eyes meet his in the mirror. Icy blues trailing up and down your body possessively.   

 His hand wraps around your throat, squeezing it gently as he trails kisses up your spine. Your hips stutter, your walls squeezing around his cock. “You like that?” he whispers into your ear, putting just the tiniest bit more pressure around your neck. You feel your walls flutter around him and he moans in your ear. His other hand squeezes at your hip, nails digging into your soft flesh.     

 With a growl, he snaps his hips against yours almost violent in its intensity. You let out a loud yelp. Slade jackhammers into you like a madman, pummeling your pussy. His tongue dragging against your sweat-covered skin.  “Cum with me, Kitten,” he grinds out, nipping at your ear. Your pussy clenches and unclenches around him trying to squeeze his cock, gripping him as if not wanting to let go of it. He bites a hickey into your neck and you feel the coil in your stomach burst. You feel a flood of warmth fill your aching core as Slade lets himself go. 

 He turns your body around to face him, careful not to separate you two. He pulls you into a deep kiss as both of you ride out your orgasms. 

 Your body slumps against Slade’s, head resting on his shoulder and chest pressing against his. Your breaths come out in puffs fanning against his neck. Slade presses a kiss to your forehead. You yawn and kiss his throat, his pulse hot against your lips. 

 “Satisfied?” he asks, pulling your wrist to his lips nipping and leaving marks on it. You wonder just how many marks he’s left on you and if he’s technically allowed to do that. It just seems bad for business. 

 “Yes, sir,” you answer, nuzzling into his shoulder. He chuckles, rubbing his large hands soothingly over your aching muscles. He holds you tenderly for a while, both of you basking in the afterglow.  

 Through thick lashes, you see Slade look at his watch. You whine when he starts to shift. Wrapping your arms around him, you press your body closer. You see his brow wrinkle and have to bite your cheek to stop yourself from smiling. Sucker. 

 Slade gives you another kiss as he reluctantly extricates himself from your warmth. You shiver at the motion. Your oversensitive walls flutter making him groan. You whimper at the feeling of emptiness as he gently places you on the soft cushions of the couch. He places another kiss on your forehead then your shoulder then your wrist as he drapes his jacket over you. “Sorry, kitten, I have some business I need to take care of,” he says tucking himself back into his pants. “But if you feel like a repeat performance, feel free to come back,” he continues, fixing his shirt as he grins down at you. Your stomach flips despite how tired you feel. 

 You watch him walk away then stop. “Oh and I’ll be keeping these,” he teases, holding up your panties and tucking them back into his pocket. You try to sit up intent on throwing the entire bottle of whiskey at him but your limbs fail you, still feeling like jelly.

  The next time you open your eyes is when you feel someone patting your cheek lightly. 

 “March,” Anthony’s voice comes out in a haze. It takes a second for your mind to recognize the name as your alias. You take a deep breath trying to quell the panic from being woken up. 

 “What time is it?”

 “A quarter past one.”

 Good, you’ve only been asleep for an hour.  

 “Thanks.”

 “You’re pretty lucky. Looks like Mr. Wilson was feeling generous,” Anthony laughs, thumb pointing to the stack of cash by the whiskey. 

 That asshole. 

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Thanks for reading! 

a/n: This will be a 3 part series because I am thirsty as hell. 

  Tag list:  @batarella, @anothertimdrakestan , @lucy-roo , @multifandomgirl-us , @idkmanicantenglish ,@birdy-bat-writes , @americasmarauders , @l-inkage , @arestorationofbalance , @cloudie-skay , @wunderstell @hyp-oh-critical

[bigskydreaming]

#when i read about tim i often kind of come to the idea that he's relatively self centered#and that can be both a flaw and a strength#but he doesn't often consider other people's feelings and circumstances#like when dick made damian robin he didn't really consider the situation from anyone else's view#or in his origin story#he doesn't seem to consider how dick would feel about hearing how tim was affected by dick's parents' death#or with the spyral situation#or in regards to him earning robin#and its pretty consistent in fandom characterization even if a lot of writers don't seem to be aware of it#its interesting cause i think its something i think he has in common with bruce#its honestly a surprisingly consistent thing from what i see#and it can be a strength to#it can absolutely lead to some confidence and self actualization#as well as being able commit to fixing something and working hard at it#because you believe you can and don't think anyone else can/will do it via @emenerd

Y’know, what’s interesting to me about these points is the fact that like.....Tim having tendencies towards self-centeredness is actually something that COMPLETELY makes sense and can be quite sympathetic in light of his backstory of having neglectful parents.

In an age of armchair diagnosticians eager to label anyone who expresses a controversial viewpoint while centering themselves as an example, as like, having a narcissistic personality disorder (and with the loaded implication that this makes them a bad person even if its true, instead of just....having a disorder, yay weaponizable ableism) like, it can be important to add in distinctions that even tendencies that share overlap with a lot of things born of entitlement, etc....aren’t always necessarily proof of that.

For instance, in Tim’s case, an overemphasis on himself and his own position in situations and arguments can very reasonably be attributed as a coping mechanism he developed in an attempt to acknowledge and address self-esteem issues he sees himself as having, DUE to parental neglect.

Its not that he thinks he’s the most important person in the room, necessarily, its that he spent so many years not even being considered a person in the room, that now he OVERCOMPENSATES on his own behalf, in an attempt to remind himself that no, his opinion and feelings and situations do matter.....and because he like most of the Bat-characters has a tendency towards hyper-fixating on a problem they’re trying to address, this can also understandably create a kind of tunnel vision. Where he’s so busy focusing on what he’s diagnosed as an actual issue he has that he’s trying to address or make up for, in order to build up his self-esteem....that he neglects to keep everyone around him equally centered in his interactions with them, and remember that like, they have their own issues and ignoring that to focus entirely on his own runs the risk of negatively impacting them in the exact same way he’s still learning to cope with having been negatively impacted in his development as a child.

None of this makes him a bad person, or is stuff that can’t be addressed and developed just by paying the appropriate attention to it and his interactions.

SO the issue I tend to more often have....

Is with how often in fandom and fanon we hear references to Tim’s neglect and emotional abuse and how this impacted him.....much in the same way we see Jason and Cass and Damian and Dick’s various forms of abuse and the developmental impact it had on them....

BUT there tends to then be a disconnect, IMO, because that acknowledgment of the WHAT of Tim’s neglect and abuse and the HOW it hurt him.....isn’t often followed up by an examination/awareness of how it also SHAPED him.....at least, not compared to how discussions/fics about say, Jason’s abuse tend to point out the latter as much as the former.

And this is a big part of my gripe with the ways abuse is centered and tackled as a topic in fics and fandom discussions, because its so often capitalized upon as a defense or shield for a character from criticism, stuff like that.....without ever actually EXPLORING the topic itself, or the FULLNESS of the impact it can have.

But only in regards to some characters.

What I mean is like....we see a lot of focus on Jason’s childhood abuse, yeah? And this often is then connected through headcanons, meta and fics to various aspects of Jason’s characterization as a teenager, and as an adult as well.....with a tendency towards anger or violence, abrasive personality, etc. Don’t get me wrong, its usually presented as such in a SYMPATHETIC light, especially when raised by fans of Jason themselves.....but his abuse is very much present and centered in fics and discussions as something that not only impacted him and made him suffer, but something that actually shaped him to varying degrees as well....with a lot of focus then in fics of him as an adult, like, paid to him going to therapy and unpacking his childhood abuse in an effort to WORK on these aspects of himself that make his present day life harder or less healthy than he’d like it to be. The issue of how his abuse lent itself to various behaviorisms is raised in order to address various byproducts of his abuse as FLAWS that he seeks to eliminate, in order to make himself happier and make himself someone that people want to be around more.

And again, don’t get me wrong - for the most part, this is a GOOD thing. The caveat here is just a personal dislike I have for how often these narratives smack of a kind of saviorism, and act like it was only through the grace of Bruce and becoming part of the Batfam that Jason’s ever afforded the opportunity to better himself as a person. I dislike the hell out of this because it not only pairs all too well with a lot of classist shit, it feeds into the singular narrative we’re so often presented with by media about abused kids: the myth of the victim being destined to become a victimizer, it all being an inevitable cycle. The reason this myth is so easily perpetuated is the exact reason I’m so critical of the saviorism in a lot of abused-Jason fics.....people can very easily fall into the trap of assuming that abused kids are likely to grow up to be abusers because they never have anyone to TEACH them that abuse is wrong, or to lead by healthy example. 

The harm of this perception is that it kinda throws under the bus every kid who never lucks out and gets a Bruce Wayne style savior swooping in to not only save them from their abusive environs, but TEACH them that they deserved better and that abuse is wrong. 

Because its like, uh, the thing is, plenty of abused kids who never get a personal mentor or savior figure are fully capable of figuring out for themselves that they deserve better and that people hurting them is wrong, because it makes them feel bad and they don’t like that? 

Many abused kids don’t grow up in a media vacuum where they simply have no access to glimpses of lives different from their own.....we see kids having happier, healthier family lives on TV or in books and are able to figure out that society overall thinks that’s what family is SUPPOSED to look like, and its ours that is the aberration? 

The very fact that we’re taught or have it instilled in us by abusive parents that like, we’re not to bring up instances or examples of our abuse to teachers or friends, that its a SECRET, is like, usually a dead giveaway that there’s something WRONG with it that we’re being instructed - and enforced with abusive consequences - to keep from alerting others to....like, this is basically a blaring siren to a lot of us that no, what’s happening to us ISN’T normal and acceptable, and that’s literally WHY the parent we’re afraid of is so insistent on us keeping the facts of it hidden? 

And so like, tons of abused kids figure out for ourselves the difference between right or wrong, based off nothing more than our own feelings about things and a desire to not be like the people who make us feel miserable - like, never underestimate the power of spite to like, keep a kid from growing up doing the same thing to others that was done to them, lol. 

But point being, lots of kids never get a Bruce Wayne figure to take them away from their abuse and also teach them that they never deserved it and how not to pass the hurt forward by doing the same things to others. And its kinda condescending as fuck that we so often see narratives that take it as so obvious it barely merits commenting on, that like, ‘of COURSE abused kids grow up to become abusers if they don’t have someone else step in and show them a better way’....mmm, no. Fuck that. But you get what I mean.

So like, its a mixed bag. Its a good thing, to see Jason-centric stories that show him addressing his childhood and seeking just a more fuller, happier, healthier life for himself. Its a less great thing to see this narrative presented as all encompassing, with it never being raised that no, Jason actually could figure out he deserved better and how to treat people in ways he’d want to be treated even without a billionaire guardian angel.....NOT because the narrative wherein someone helps an abused kid figure out what was wrong about how they were treated is like, NEVER valid....but rather it just becomes a problem when looked at as a data point against the larger tapestry of fandom-wide works....and noticing that this specific narrative is pretty much the ONLY one raised or treated as valid. With it just being ASSUMED to be the natural course of events and characters, rather than just....the direction society overall has their perceptions of abuse steered towards due to a singular and constantly reinforced abuse narrative shown to us in media.

And the way this all plays back into my point about Tim and what took me down this road in general.....

Is that disconnect I was talking about, lies specifically in HOW Tim is often acknowledged and regarded as an abuse survivor due to his emotional abuse and neglect......with this abuse and its impact on HIM often taking center stage, much the way Jason’s abuse and its impact takes center stage in his narratives.....

BUT with a key difference being that while a lot of Jason’s narratives go on to denote the specific ways his abuse helped SHAPE him and his interactions with others, and raise and address the ways in which he can better himself and his relationships by unpacking all of this openly....

Most of the stories about Tim’s abuse/neglect tend to just STOP at the awareness of its existence and impact on him. Never taking it that one step further to examine how those specific forms of abuse could have additionally SHAPED him....in ways that sometimes negatively impact those around him and his own loved ones, even if this is completely unintentional on his part. The difference, the disconnect, lies solely in how rarely its ever acknowledged that Tim’s own upbringing can and does play directly into how he interacts with people later on in life.....and in ways that he’s fully capable of addressing and bettering himself so as to be happier and healthier just in his own life, and in his relationships, as someone others want to be around.

Aaaaand once you actually examine or consider WHY there’s this discrepancy between the full ramifications of Tim’s abuse and that which various siblings of his underwent, when there’s full agreement that what he did go through absolutely can be termed abusive as well....like, its the implications of what about Tim makes him more naturally resistant or whatever to being shaped by his abuse in ways that have actual negative impact on others in his life, whereas the same isn’t true of say, Jason.....that’s when the red flags start to go up for me, and the unintended subtext starts to get Less Than Stellar, IMO.

Anyway. Just food for thought on the subject of Tim, his upbringing, the various impacts this had on not JUST him but also on how he interacts with others, and ways in which all of this compares and contrasts with how the subject of abuse is raised and depicted in regards to other Batkids.