#and i am learning about the situation too so it's useful

[thebibliosphere]

Calling you out for excellent self-talk strategies.

I’ve noticed in your posts about ongoing health that you often finish up with something along the lines of “I am experiencing Situations and Limitations, and this is ok. It is unpleasant, but still ok”

(Ok as in morally neutral, not as in everything is fine and normal and should be ignored)

And like… I can’t articulate how much I appreciate seeing that. It’s helpful as an outsider to see things put into context like that, and it’s also excellent modeling. Because I try so hard to talk to myself the same way, but sometimes it’s… just… really hard. And seeing other people using the same words makes it feel a tiny bit easier, for me, like it’s a little more real. And maybe it is actually ok.

Thank you for noticing, and I’m glad it’s something you find validating.

It’s actually something I’ve learned from radical acceptance therapy.

Too many people think that acceptance means either giving up or that you’ve found a way to be positive about something, when in reality it is a neutral stance.

I work daily to accept the curve balls my complex health needs throw at me. I am not happy about them, and nor do I need to be.

I refuse to embrace toxic positivity and say I am thankful for the challenges I overcome because I am not. No one needs to be thankful for surviving suffering. You are not obligated to find meaning in your pain.

It can just be something that is.

But nor should I view myself as negative.

I can acknowledge that I have negative feelings toward it, but I refuse to assign moral value to my situation because health is morally neutral. I will not berate myself with shoulda, coulda, woulda. That’s the path to madness and one I’ve been down many times before.

It’s far more healthful for me to say, “wow, this sucks. What can I do in this moment to care for myself that is realistic and mindful of my limitations?” and move on from there.

Sometimes the answer is “nothing” in which case I accept that all I can do is rest and be kind to myself over it.

It’s hard. But it’s a skill worth learning.

[captainuranium543]

Ft headcanons nobody wanted part 2

-natsu will occasionally get genuinely jealous over his friends owning appliances for heating. Why should they need those things when they have him, if they just call him over her do a way better job then any of those stupid gadgets. He finds out gray owns a hair dryer and immediately becomes a jealous ex girlfriend. He confronts Lucy in her apartment one night acting so serious he she doesn't even get mad that he broke in, then just goes "care to explain this?" And puts a lighter on the table.

- Wendy is very very quiet. Creepily so. Not elaborating but I think you can imagine the kinds of situations this leads to.

- Mira's eyes glow in the dark and it creeps everyone the fuck out

- erza has the worst hoarding problem. Her dorm room is entirely piled floor to ceiling with boxes of meticulously organized random items she refuses to throw out for some reason

young Mira: "alright this is ridiculous why do you even have this"

Young erza: "say what you want but when you need 746 packets of Mcnolias sweet and sour sauce and find your supply baron I'll be laughing"

- levy is one of the few members of the guild who actively sought it out to join. Before fairy tail she was an orphan and a student studying magic. She left to join fairy tail to learn more about magic in general from real world experience.

- laki will sometimes build creepily realistic wooden statues of her guild mates and leave them around in inconspicuous places so when you find them they scare the shit out of you. Sometimes she hides them too well and it takes years to discover them.

- Lucy has actually written several unpublished novels and the only other person who's ever seen them is levy. Lucy thinks their crap but levy carefully annotates every single one.

- laxus used to occasionally be forced to go on jobs with erza and Mira when they were young both to help and to make sure they didn't kill each other and he hated it.

- I think I might have said this before but I firmly believe levy, Lucy, freed and jellal later on all form a book club because they love reading, the problem is they all have vastly different tastes in book so they can never decide what to read each week and usually just end up playing Scrabble and talking shit about their various teammates

"please guys trust me this one's good"

"I am NOT reading Colleen Hoover Lucy and that's final"

- this one's based on city hero but I personally believe erza and Erik find a shocking common ground over motorcycles. Erza likes vehicles in general and Erik took up bike racing as a hobby, since discovering this is the longest they've been able to be in the same room together without someone throwing a punch.

- Wendy visits lamia scale regularly still to hang out with chelia. she usually brings romeo and they all go out to do whatever dumb kid stuff they want. (Tbh I just like her having friends her own age)

-lucy sometimes randomly lets her rich girl's heritage show in random conversation and it's always jarring. You'll be having a normal chill convo with her and then she'll look you dead in the eyes and ask you what colour your personal carriage was growing up.

- Natsu is genuinely a really good cook he just has a terrible taste so nobody wants to eat his food. For reference he only ever cooks his food because he enjoys doing it to him it tastes fine either way.

- if you had asked the fairy tail guild who the scariest guild member was in early season 1 the answers would have been erza, guildarts, laxus etc all the usual suspects. Once season 2 starts however the answer is unanimous. It's juvia. Juvia is fucking terrifying when she gets mad. You don't realize how scary water can be until it's filling your lungs and as your vision blurs until all you can see is her merciless stare.

- Mira and freed can drink blood for demon reasons. gray can too after getting devil slayer but he thinks its gross. Surprisingly so can gajeel because of the high iron content.

- gray the type of guy who's bed has only the smallest thinnest blanket on his bed and usually it's on the ground cuz he gets too hot

- meanwhile erza is the type of girl to have so many pillows, blankets and plushies on her bed you wonder how she fucking sleeps in it. Mf has a NEST.

- Lucy isn't even surprised anymore when she finds people in her house, she doesn't know how they keep getting in and honestly she doesn't care anymore she's to tired to deal with it.

- freed plays a lot of really fucking weird instruments. Idk it just seems like something he would do.

- bixlow can speak most languages and it's always really surprising when he randomly says smth like "oh yea I can speak ancient nirvid no prob" like that's totally normal

- if laxus and freed ever did get together (in my heart it's cannon) evergreen and bixlow would be their biggest haters. Yea they love them and they're happy for them but also EW. GROSS. GET A ROOM.

[clarisse0o]

Camp Wiegman-Part 72

Lucy Bronze x Ona Batlle

Alternative Universe: Military School

Words: 5K

Masterlist

———————————————————————

Monday, March 21; 6:30 AM - Dormitory

The atmosphere on this Monday morning is very heavy. It isn't Lucy who came to do the daily check. It seems that information about last night's incident has been escalated higher than expected. It’s crazy how a minor altercation could have such wide-reaching consequences. When I asked Ingrid about it, she said it was beyond her control. Wiegman was apparently notified last night by students who complained, and it seems this has landed Alba in serious trouble. It looks like she’ll be stuck with Lucy all day. I find it excessive, but according to Ingrid, Wiegman wanted to impose a severe punishment on someone who is in their final year. I hadn’t noticed before, but it seems several people witnessed the dispute from behind their windows. Alexia is furious to learn we’ve been spied on like this. Fortunately, nothing serious was revealed. It’s safe to say there’s no point in discussing it with Ale this morning. I didn’t try to stop her when she stormed out of the room this morning. I did make sure to thank Ingrid for the information before we went our separate ways. I was about to join my roommate at that moment, but Misa intercepted me as I was leaving.

"Hey."

"Hi."

She seems really uncomfortable. I think I know why she’s here. We might not get along, but we’re connected by our loved ones who have issues. We witnessed a conversation that should have stayed private. The difference between her and me is that I know the answers to her questions, and she must suspect as much. I abandon the idea of joining Ale to stay with Misa, who looks quite worried.

"People seem pretty excited this morning..." she comments.

I smile sadly. I can tell she’s trying to make small talk. She probably doesn’t know what’s going on. If I know, it’s because I have good relations with the instructors. I nervously run my hand through my hair. If I were in her place, I’d appreciate being informed, so I go ahead.

"Listen, I just learned that Alba’s in serious trouble because of her outburst last night. She’s going to be stuck with Bronze for the day."

"Really?" she asks, surprised. "Damn... How do you know?"

"Uh, Engen. She just informed Ale. She left angry. I was planning to join her."

I congratulate myself on coming up with such a realistic excuse. If we know, it’s only because we hang out with our instructor outside of here.

"This is ridiculous! This situation is going too far!"

"I agree."

"Bronze did this?"

"No, Wiegman was informed. She’s just following orders, I suppose..."

"You seem close with her. Can’t you talk to her?"

"I’d like to, but when the orders don’t come from her, there’s not much she can do."

She bites her lip and shakes her head. She looks distressed. I hope they haven’t planned anything for the weekend because Alba is likely to be stuck here because of this situation.

"Thanks... You’re nicer than I expected."

"Uh, thanks, I guess."

We laugh together. In reality, I’ve never quite known what to make of her. She’s intriguing. She’s always been cold from the start. I was surprised that Alba was dating her, but then again, she must be nicer than we all imagine.

"We didn’t start off well; I’m sorry. I was afraid you might be interested in Alba someday. She’s always shown interest in you since you arrived, whereas I’ve had my eye on her for a long time," she admits.

I smile at her honesty. I suspected her behavior was related to Alba. She used to give me dagger looks every time she saw us laughing together.

"You don’t have to apologize; I understand. She made advances, but I turned her down right from the start. I’m in a situation I’m happy with my girlfriend, and I have no intention of looking elsewhere. So you can be at ease."

She nods again. I can tell she’s holding back questions.

"Go on, it’s my day of charity, so ask me the questions that are bothering you."

"Oh no—"

"Yes, I insist," I giggle. "Take advantage of it, it doesn’t happen every day."

"No, I was just thinking that you’re close with Ale. Alba really values your friendship. She thought Alexia was very lonely before you came."

"That’s true. We’ve become very close."

"She must confide in you a lot."

I smile, understanding where she’s going with this.

"Yes. I know everything that’s going on, but it’s not my place to say."

"Do you know her girlfriend?"

"Yes. I’ve seen her before. She’s from Manchester."

"Yes, Alba knows that, but she doesn’t know who knows, and I think that’s what’s bothering her. She realizes it’s serious and she doesn’t know if the girl is decent."

"She’s good for her, I can assure you. She’s the love of her life. If Alexia doesn’t reveal her identity, it’s because she’s afraid Alba won’t accept her. It would be a disaster for her; she’s only known her sister as family before her girlfriend and me."

"I see..."

"Well, you know what? Try to pass on this message to her before tonight so she can calm down. As for me, I’ll go see Bronze to see if I can change her mind about the confrontation tonight."

"I don’t think you’ll manage. They almost fought last night because of Alba. She’s out of control when she’s angry, and I doubt Bronze will let this discussion go on without a mediator."

"You think?"

"Definitely. Negotiate our presence at the meeting instead. Maybe our presence will reassure them."

She’s probably right. Lucy won’t risk leaving them alone after last night. I’ll need to persuade her not to repeat anything to Jenni then.

"Okay," I sigh. "We’ll go with that."

"Cool... Thanks for your help."

"You don’t have to thank me. I’m doing it for Alexia. But it was nice talking to you."

She gives me a shy smile in response. I think I might have at least managed to bury the hatchet with this conversation, so that’s a win.

"If you want to know, I was a bit annoyed that you managed to be so well-connected in such a short time. You hadn’t done anything to make friends, yet you were the center of everyone’s attention when you arrived. I never figured out how you did it," she laughs.

"It’s thanks to Ale that I got into the group. That’s why I owe her so much. As for the attention from other students, I could have done without it, you know," I giggle.

"Not surprising," she laughs. "It must have been really overwhelming."

"Yeah, but it’s all over now, and that’s a relief."

"People eventually get used to everything," she finishes with a shrug.

I nod and open the door to the cafeteria.

"Want to eat with us?" I offer.

"I’d love to, thanks."

"Just don’t expect a good atmosphere. I’ve never seen Ale in such a foul mood."

She laughs, saying she wouldn’t expect anything different given the situation. I really hope everything gets resolved quickly.

Monday, March 21; 1:45 PM - Classroom Building

I make my way through the students heading to their classes as I head to Lucy’s office. I haven’t had the chance to see or speak with her yet. However, just seeing her from afar with a tense expression and Alba slumped on the table at noon makes it clear that their morning wasn’t the most glorious.

-   Bronze,   I call out as she’s about to close the door to her office.

I see her frown before spotting me in the crowd. She relaxes and lets me in before shutting the door. Before I can say a word, I find myself pressed against the door with her lips on mine. I cling to her hair, but it’s quickly interrupted by a throat clearing. I blush seeing Ingrid in the room, but Lucy doesn’t seem bothered, sighing into my neck. Her friend watches us with a small amused smile while I am mortified. I don’t particularly enjoy public displays, but I endure it knowing Lucy needs affection right now. I don’t even dare to ask the question I came for, fearing it might upset her.

-   Can we just go back to the weekend?   she murmurs.

I laugh, running my hand through her hair and kissing her temple.

-   I’d like that too.  

-   Tell me you’re here to explain all this nonsense. Alba didn’t want to tell me anything, no matter how much I tried to break her this morning.  

I raise an eyebrow. I expected her to figure it out herself.

-   What?  

-   I thought you’d understand. Alba was worried because we came back just before the scheduled time. Since it had never happened before, she thought she was never coming back. She knows Ale is seeing someone, but she doesn’t know who it is.  

-   Oh... Is this all because she doesn’t know about Jenni? It’s absurd.  

-   Well, I’d be annoyed too if Joan didn’t tell me who he’s seeing. Can you imagine the worry she must have if she hadn’t come back?  

She sighs and steps back. I understand she might not get it since she doesn’t have siblings, but I do.

-   And so what? I’m not going to force Alexia to reveal Jenni’s identity.  

-   I spoke with Misa this morning,   I say, raising her eyebrow.   We’d like to be present tonight. At least we can help ease the atmosphere. I can’t see Alexia until tonight, so I won’t have time to talk to her before then.  

-   Okay,   she sighs.   Let’s do that. Now I’ll walk you to class,   she says, checking her watch.   You’re late after all.  

-   It’s not a big deal.  

-   It will be if he doesn’t accept you. You won’t get your weekend if Wiegman is in a bad mood.  

-   I have Johnson. I’ll just use your charm and we’ll be set.  

I give her a wink that makes her roll her eyes with a small smile. She kisses me one last time and waves goodbye to Ingrid. We head towards my classroom. This day feels endless; I can’t wait for it to be over.

  Monday, March 21; 5:15 PM - Lucy’s Office  

I’m slouched in a chair in front of Lucy’s desk, waiting for the others to arrive. Misa was the first to come. She chose the chair next to mine to keep the Putellas siblings as far away as possible, just in case. I managed to catch her between classes to tell her to come here after school. Ingrid isn’t here, but I’m not surprised. She never involves herself in problems that don’t concern her unless she has to. Lucy sips her coffee while observing us. Misa, who’s in class with Alba and Ale, let us know she was the first to leave the locker rooms after their sports session. She didn’t want to wait for them because she suspects they’re taking their time.

-   If this keeps up, I’m going to go get them,   my girlfriend says, annoyed.

Just then, there’s a knock on the door. Alexia is the first to enter, closely followed by her brother. You can feel the palpable tension radiating from them. When Ale sees me, she looks surprised at first but then relieved. She immediately sits down next to me.

-   Sorry for the delay,   she says to my girlfriend.

-   No problem. We’re just waiting for you, Alba. I don’t have all day.  

Alba clenches her fists and takes the last available seat next to Misa. No one knows how this conversation will end, but Lucy is the one who takes charge, opening the proceedings.

-   Well. We’re finally gathered after a fifteen-minute wait,   she says with a disconcerting calm.   Don’t think I’m thrilled to be here for such a ridiculous matter. What happened yesterday is unacceptable. Private matters should not be exposed like they were yesterday. I won’t force anyone to talk, but if you need to, now is the time. Misa and Ona insisted on being here to support you. We’ll act as mediators if needed. It’s not something that’s offered to you every day.  

Her opening statement leads to silence. For a long time, no one dares to speak. Alexia focuses intently on her nails while her sister turns her head away from us. I exchange a look with Misa that says a lot about our thoughts.

-   I don’t understand why you don’t just say who it is,   Alba says very calmly.

Lucy, who has been watching us, leans back in her seat, crossing her arms while making sure to keep her coffee in hand. She’s understood that she’s just started the discussion.

-   Because you always act excessively when it comes to my relationships. I’ve never been able to have a decent friend. Either they ran away because you were too protective, or you made me lose them by making us change schools.  

-   Oh, and you think I enjoyed doing that? You have a talent for always picking the wrong people! Most of them weren’t even worth associating with.  

-   Excuse me, but I wouldn’t have appreciated someone choosing my friends for me either,  I interject.

-   You have nothing to say,   she snaps at me.   You don’t know what kind of mess we were in. And besides, you’re not exactly good at choosing your friends either!  

Lucy sits up at these words. I knew she would defend me, but I didn’t need her to do it.

-   You don’t know anything about my life either! Who do you think you are to judge everyone around you? It’s honorable to want to protect your sister from the world, but we live in a world where suffering is not an option. We all go through tough times, but that doesn’t mean everyone else has to suffer too! Yes, I had a painful past, yes, I struggled to overcome it, but I did it! Alexia is challenging you to show that she’s finally ready to live without you in her life, and you’re having a hard time accepting it, that’s all! You’ll have to face the fact that she’s not the little girl you used to defend at all costs!  

My retort surprises her enough to silence her completely. When I catch Lucy’s eye, I notice her smile. I feel proud of myself for managing to say this without stuttering. I’m no longer that defenseless girl who arrived here at the beginning of the year. I’m finally starting to regain my confidence.

-  Ona is right, Ale murmurs.   You’re my sister, and I understand your intentions, but you’re really being a pain. I’ve never regretted following you here, but you really need to stop covering for me. I can make my own decisions now.  

-   I’m sorry you feel that way, she sighs.

She stands up, turning his back on us. Our words seem to have affected her more than she wanted. After a moment of reflection, she turns back around.

-   Are you afraid I’ll judge your girlfriend? Does she even exist?  

-   Of course she exists. If I’m not telling you who she is, it’s because I fear your reaction.  

-   If you say that, then I must know her. Are you back with Laia?  

-   Eww, no!  

I laugh at the image. It’s true; she did date her. I almost forgot how she no longer hangs out with us much. Ale sighs, casting a glance my way. She’s trying to figure out what to do, but it’s not up to me to decide. So, I shrug.

-   You know her too, Ona?   she suddenly realizes.

-   Well, yes. I thought I had already mentioned that we spend our weekends together lately.  

-   With your girlfriend, I assume, she murmurs, staring at my neck.

I turn around, burying my head in my hands. Lucy seems to find this scene amusing, even though it’s all her fault. She seriously needs to calm her bloodlust in the future.

-   Anyway, she grumbles.   If I promise to accept her, would you be willing to introduce her to me? We could have a man-to-man conversation that way.  

I roll my eyes. Alexia sighs and, against all odds, surprises everyone by conceding.

-   Her name is Jenni. Jenni Hermoso  

I turn to see Alba’s reaction. She doesn’t seem to recognize the name at first. I then remember she doesn’t know the names. There’s a spark in her eyes as she makes the connection.

-   Hermoso ? Instructor Hermoso ?  

-   You promised not to get angry,   I remind her.

She takes a deep breath, pinching the bridge of her nose. Everything must have clicked into place in her mind.

-  You were the student who had a relationship with her? Are you kidding me? You let Luna get expelled in your place!? 

-  It was her idea,  Alexia defends herself.  She wanted to leave here. 

Seeing that she was starting to lose her composure despite her promise not to get angry, I glance at Misa to signal her. It’s her moment to act. She understands the message and stands up.

-  Remember what I told you this afternoon,  Misa says.

-  How can I believe that she’s a good match for her!? She’s much older than she is! 

-  Not that much, Lucy replies. Only six years. 

We all turn to Lucy. Her expression is cold. It’s clear she will defend her best friend at all costs. Alba turns pale, but the reasons are different from what I expected.

-  A-are you going to tell Wiegman? Alexia will be expelled if you do! 

That’s true; I hadn’t considered that option. She doesn’t know that Lucy is my girlfriend.

-  No,  she says.  The matter is closed, and I have no intention of jeopardizing a student’s future at this point in the year. 

She nods with relief. We exchange a small, discreet smile. Living our relationship in front of my loved ones is getting increasingly difficult.

-  I want to meet her. 

-  I’m not sure that’s a good idea,  Ale comments.

-  Why not? You want me to accept her, don’t you? So, I want to meet her. I want to make sure she takes care of you. 

Alexia looks at me with concern. It’s a good idea. I would have suggested that we accompany her for this encounter, but Lucy would never agree. Too many people already know about us, and we can’t risk putting ourselves in more danger. One wrong conversation and everything could be ruined. I still nod gently to confirm that she should agree. She bites her lip and turns to her sister.

-  Okay. But I’m warning you, you better not threaten her or anything. I really care about her, so you better not mess things up. We both know how you can lose your temper over nothing. 

-  Yeah, yeah, I’ll try to stay calm,  she mutters.

-  Well, I think that’s settled then. 

-  Yes. Thank you, Ale replies.

-  It’s my job. Now, you all better get out of here. I have other work waiting for me. 

-  Can I stay? For my homework. 

-  If you want, but I won’t have time to help you with your revisions tonight. 

-  That’s okay. I was told to slow down, so I’m not sure I’ll be studying tonight. 

-  I don’t know who told you that, but it’s very good advice. 

I laugh as I get up. The others follow suit and put the two extra chairs back in front of Ingrid’s desk. I tell them I’ll join them once I’m finished here. Unlike me, they are very eager to leave.

-  If you could avoid getting into fights before then, I’d appreciate it. 

-  We’ll try,  Alexia replies with amusement.  Have a good evening. 

-  Good evening to you too. 

They leave, leaving the door open. I would have preferred them to close it, but it’s not a big deal. Lucy is already engrossed in her computer, so I take out my things.

-  That went pretty well, didn’t it?  Lucy asks.

-  Yes, it did. I think it’ll be fine now. 

-  Hmm. Alexia realizes we won’t be there for the meeting between the two buddy, right? 

I laugh and nod.

-  I think she suspects as much, but I’ll remind her. 

-  Good. What a shitty day. You better not make a mistake this week. I don’t want to end up spending my weekend here as well. 

-  I’ll try to be on my best behavior,  I tease her.

-  It’s not funny. I have a meeting with Wiegman on Friday. I’m going to give her my resignation letter. 

-  Oh, really? 

I didn’t even know she had written it. Anyway, she must have prepared it during the day.

-  Aren’t you happy?  she smiles.  It feels like the end is near. 

-  It’s not that I’m not happy, it’s just that it adds more pressure,  I giggle.

She rolls her eyes with amusement. I’ve never had the blues about an exam. Even my high school diploma seemed less important compared to now.

-  It’ll be fine, don’t worry. You’re really putting too much pressure on yourself for nothing. 

-  Hmm. 

-  Finish your homework and then go join your friends. It’ll do you good. Alexia is probably looking forward to talking to you. 

I nod and get to work. She’s right. I could tell she hoped I would follow her advice.

-  Thank you. I don’t know what I’d do without you,  I say, making her laugh.

-  I don’t know either. I often wonder that myself,  she teases.

-  Oh, and by the way. You’re not planning to talk about what happened with Jenni, are you? 

-  I would have if it hadn’t ended so well. We’ll see how things turn out now. One thing’s for sure, it’s their problem, not ours. 

I bite my lip at her response. She’s right, but that doesn’t stop me from worrying about my friend. I hope everything will turn out okay for her. I really don’t want to have to pick up the pieces.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

"Him guilting Ladybug into staying quiet is why Lila is able to maintain her power for 4 more seasons."

I mean, I would blame more the writers for taking way too long to have Adrien realize his advice was bad.

(Post the quote is from)

Reminder that I am never actually blaming the characters, they are not real people. That's why this is explicitly a writing blog. In the context of the writing, yes, the pacing of everything Lila was terrible and is the real source of the issues. That doesn't change the fact that Adrien is the main narrative tool used to keep Marinette in line, thus me "blaming" him.

As you said, Adrien looks bad here not because he didn't understand how to handle the situation and gave bad advice, but because it takes him so long to realize that his advice was bad and apologize.

During Lila's first appearance, we see Adrien chastises Ladybug for being too mean to Lila, never once acknowledging that it was valid for Ladybug to be upset (S1E26). She is painted as fully in the wrong even though Lila was actively manipulating him and Ladybug arguably protected him here:

Adrien: Wait! Lila! (Lila runs away) Hey, what was that all about? Uh, I mean, weren't you kinda harsh with her? Ladybug: I...I don't put up with lies, especially when they're about me. (yo-yos away)

During Lila's second appearance (or, at least her second appearance where she actually interacts with the cast) he further drives that message home by telling Marinette to let Lila lie to people because he's more worried about hurting Lila's feelings than he is about removing Lila's power (S3E01):

Adrien: Are you going to tell everyone? Marinette: 'Course I am. Lila is— Adrien: (interrupting) A liar. Yes, I know. But do you really think exposing her will make things better? If you humiliate her, she'll just be hurt more. Making a bad guy suffer has never turned them into a good guy. Lila: Ladybug and I are like two peas in a pod. Marinette: So we just stand by and let her lie? Adrien: As long as you and I both know the truth, does it really matter? Marinette: You're right, maybe it's not such a big deal.

We'll circle back to how terrible this advice was in a second. First lets finish off going through the sequence of events.

And finally, at the tail end of season five, Adrien openly acknowledges that he's been giving terrible advice (S5E20):

Adrien: I'm sorry, Marinette. I was wrong. I shouldn't have told you to not act against Lila. If you give the slightest opportunity to people like her, they'll grasp at it and cause disasters in no time. And now, you're the one who looks like a bad person. Marinette: (reaches out to hold his hand beside her) You thought you were doing the right thing. Just like with Chloe. That's another reason why I love you, Adrien. You always want to see the good in other people. But sometimes, the good we think we see in some people is just a reflection of our own, and we end up being fooled by our own kindness. (They squeeze each other's hands.) But we'll find a way to expose Lila eventually.

If we look at these three moments in a vacuum, this is honestly a good character arc for a character like Adrien. He's a peace keeper, which is a wonderful match to Marinette's blind justice approach. It's good that Adrien is there to balance her out! It's also good for him to learn that his approach doesn't always work and that you can't always keep the peace.

The problem is that Adrien didn't actually get a functional character arc where he learned those lessons. The episodes are so drawn out that it doesn't feel like we watch him grow and learn. His apology is almost three full seasons after his second bit of bad advice, leaving us to wonder when he changed his mind because Lila does a lot of awful things during those three seasons. What moment made him realize that he was in the wrong here? We don't know, so this feels less like growth and more like the writers throwing in a scene to shut up fans who were still complaining about Adrien's terrible advice even though it had been four real world years since he actually gave it.

There's also the issue that Adrien tells Marinette, "making a bad guy suffer has never turned them into a good guy." This line implies that Adrien's goal is to help Lila change. The problem is that we never see him do that. He doesn't try to help Lila. The most we get is him making a deal with Lila to protect Marinette, but that's not him helping Lila change. He doesn't approach that conversation as if he's trying to help Lila see that what she did was wrong. He approaches it as if he knows that she won't change. It's less trying to make Lila a better person and more a deal with the devil:

Adrien: (sits next to Lila) I warned you once already, Lila, but you didn't listen. You hurt my friend Marinette, and that's not okay. Lila: Me? Hurting Marinette? But she's the one who- Adrien: I don't know how to prove you lied, Lila, because you're good at it. So you'll just have to come up with another lie, just as convincing. Only this time it's gonna prove Marinette's innocent. Lila: Why would I do that, Adrien? Adrien: Because we're friends, aren't we?

Minor Chloe rant incoming:

This is yet another situation where it would be so much better for the show if Adrien had actually done something to help Chloe change and succeeded. If he did that, thought it was a good path for everyone, and then tried to do the same thing for Lila, then this could have been a really great way to set him up for dealing with his dad. To teach him that you can only help people who want to be better without having everyone he tries to help stay "evil" as that's pretty depressing. As-is, we've literally seen him say that Chloe will never change so why does he believe that Lila can change? They're not portraying him as an optimist, they're portraying him as delusional. Terrible writing. Zero stars.

Rant over.

By the way, the above quote was the 24th episode of season three, roughly two seasons before Adrien's apology to Marinette. If he's viewing Lila as the devil here, then this should be where we get that apology. Or Adrien should approach this as him trying to make Lila better and Lila should play along, making Adrien think that he's right and that he's helping her change. Either approach would be better than the nonsense canon gave us.

In a well written show, this would all go down over the course of a single season or even just a few episodes. As-is, the season five apology feels like too little too late. What little kid is going to be able to follow this "character arc" and learn the lesson that Adrien maybe sort of learned? Casual viewers will likely not even remember that Adrien gave Marinette bad advice back at the start of season three because why would they? This is not how you do a good subplot. It's almost as drawn out as the Gabriel plot and that's insane! A subplot is supposed to be a short story within the story so that things feel like they're moving forward.

[cosmojjong]

quick blabbering (?)

[sunlit-mess]

consumed by the inevitable

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s2 episode 7 thoughts

hmm. hmm. that is the sound if me pondering what i just watched.

(i understand that this episode was an analysis into mulder's self-destructive behaviors when faced with overwhelming grief, but. that does not mean i enjoyed vampire hookup time)

well. we shall start from the top!

i read that it was an episode about vampires which i thought was a weird narrative choice because. hello. scully still gone??? but then i remembered that i too ignored the main quest in skyrim to hunt some vampires and that i had no place to judge

(granted, my main quest wasn't finding scully though. might have given that a bit more priority than saving the whole world. because she IS my whole world)

we open with a guy that looks like joe biden meeting with an attractive young woman. they're making out in a hot tub and we just know someone is gonna get slurped upon. and woe, it be upon us! double vampire attack.

back in DC, mulder gets his old office back! it's covered in plastic. he takes some of it off. he adjusts his calendar from may to november, so we see how much time he and scully had been assigned to other tasks, which also has me wondering how she managed to get a new house that quick.

(also, this calendar is... scantily clad women posing next to tools such as hammers and saws. was this allowed? was this acceptable? was it normal? were the 90's a lawless wasteland and mulder an irreparable freak?)

well. scully is an x file now, and he puts her glasses and id into an evidence bag and closes the filing cabinet which was sooooo evil. but he can't bring himself to put her necklace away. oh man. oh he's gotta have it in case he finds her. he has to hold her close. i'm Fine this is Fine.

so. he goes out to california to deal with the joe biden looking fellow being murdered. and he is not wanted on the crime scene. we know this because someone greets him by saying "nobody called the bureau" and he says "well, they should have" and lifts up the tape to let himself in. because one thing about him is that he's gonna let himself into a place he isn't wanted.

he sees the writing of a bible verse in blood on the wall and says something about their grasp of biblical knowledge being "feeble and literal" and i was like okayyy need to have a theological discussion with him

he then scares the other guy who originally wanted to kick him out by reciting a LARGE amount of facts related to similar cases and it's very much giving photographic memory. got me thinking, have we ever seen this man forget something? (directions don't count. they're confusing. but everything else sticks in that man's brain)

he just needs one thing: a phone book. which he uses to call a blood bank and ask about a new guy. who must be the vampire who did this!

so he rolls up to the blood bank and i'm over here struggling because i do Not Do Blood, and i knew at this point this was gonna be a tough watch, but i didn't anticipate the non-blood related reasons why this would be true

anyway he's sniffing around the blood bank and he hears some slurping and wouldn't you know, this dude is tearing into a bag of the red stuff like it's a capri sun. somehow he gets him into custody, where the dude refuses to talk because the lights are on, and mulder comes in with a lamp he put a red filter over, because he was prepared for vampire interrogation.

the vampire is going on about how what he did isn't murder because it's not like animals hunting prey is murder which is. not the greatest approach in terms of legal defense. mulder tells the guard that the guy is delusional and it's best to play along, and he believed this to be true... until he, quite literally, burned to a crisp in the sunlight. and died.

he's talking to the coroner and rattling off a bunch of vampire facts and says he didn't believe in vampires which is so funny to me because like. why is that where you draw the line, my friend. not at bigfoot and definitely not at aliens. but man. vampires are just too out there for spooky mulder. until now!

the coroner has a very funny line: "you are really upsetting me... on several levels" which seems to be the general effect fox mulder has on people. and also because i felt the same way about his dumbass actions during this episode.

coroner finds a stamp on the dead body's hand, which seems to come from a nightclub. so naturally our fbi agent ends up there.

you often see posts saying that "(insert character here) should be at the club". i fear that this is not the case for fox mulder, but it's possible that it's his suit and tie that are throwing me off. he just doesn't seem like he belongs there. i ask myself, where should he be instead? perhaps some sort of star wars convention would suit him better. a book signing with some author he likes. idk, an interior decorating festival. not here.

i shall use my verbatim words to walk you through the next scene:

"pause. he's talking to a woman who was looking into a compact without a mirror. so. vampire suspect. and now why are they getting so close together. and getting a drink. okay now they're leaving to a new spot together? AFTER she admits to vampirism"

(here she did some stuff that required me to look away from my screen due to my Weak Constitution. but also it would have felt necessary to look away anyway because it was getting... charged)

she tries to get him to... suck on her finger... but he won't do it because aids. which is fair. i think that's a smart move, actually. it's just that getting flirty with a vampire he knows was involved with a ton of killings was such a stupid move, i don't know why it's now the braincells start to kick in.

that kills the vibe, though, so she gets another guy to take his place and things escalate.

mulder pulls in at a restaurant called ra. nice! the sun god! and he is... through a window, witnessing some more slurping action. he seems to want to intervene and save this poor soul being feasted upon...

but the poor soul is no poor soul at all! he comes out and decks mulder, and delivers this line with stunning conviction: "i don't know who you are, freak, but we're two consenting adults" and with this, he is forced to flee.

and yeah. it made me laugh. my expectations for the genre were subverted. he signed up for that shit! what he did not sign up for, however, was the next part, where he was killed by the other vampires.

cut to investigating the crime scene. mulder has brought along a forensic dentist, which is a job i had no idea you could go into. he needs to see about those bites, which are very human.

next they go to vampire woman's house. it's a very nice place. mulder... opens her oven. and sees a loaf of bread in there. and i'm thinking, man, i hope this doesn't go where i think it's going. baked goods... ovens... i never want a vampire pregnancy arc. but he cracks open the loaf and something red spills out and somehow, this to him means that she is gone and isn't coming back. he can read the signs of the bread. so add that to his resume. what did the bread tell you, my liege?

he seems to have stayed in her house, however, because he's there when she's back, and says he knows she was using the bread as a charm to ward off evil. because apparently that's an eastern european thing, blood bread to warn off evil. sound off if any eastern europeans in the chat wanna confirm or deny.

anyway. he's IN this woman he thinks is a vampire's HOUSE? what the hell. mulder seriously i need you to stop and think. like you should have stopped and done some thinking a while ago. honestly i'm not mad i'm just disappointed. and he's like "i want to save you come with me before they kill you" ohhh big tough man needs to save her huh. make him feel good inside. huh. certainly no ulterior motive here...

she's monologing about her horrible childhood and how sweet blood tastes. um girl. don't lie to him like that. i have busted my lip open before that stuff does NOT taste sweet and dangerous. it's like a penny with rust that you found in a parking lot.

it seems her vampiric origin story, if to be believed, is that things simply got too kinky. which is a new take on the genre.

(it's also about being caught in an abusive relationship and the damage that inflicts, but it seems abusive boyfriend came into vampirism at his kinky parties and things escalated from there. which. well. it blew the eyebrows clean off my head, to be fair)

at this point we see that he is WEARING SCULLY'S NECKLACE? he says something like "it's from someone i lost" and she says that she "hopes he finds her"

i did not like the undertones here and certainly not the overtones. because i knew where this was going. he was shaving in her bathroom. and let me tell you something: there is only ever a shaving scene in media because the writer needs a way to get some blood out of someone's body and into the real world. and man. i knew it was coming.

but what i didn't see coming was her SHAVING HIM??? girl. i am uncomfy. and she does, of course, cut him, and then they kiss. aggressively. terribly aggressively. can anyone answer what was going on in a satisfactory manner?

but the gag is: the original vampire- who burnt to a crisp in the jail cell, and was the abusive ex she spoke of- HE'S WATCHING THEM THROUGH THE WINDOW!

he breaks in and taunts the vampire woman about how he had to "wait for her to finish" and i was like cool. thank you SO much for that mental image i'm super happy with it. i definitely don't feel like i need a shower. but then he's going on about how he can't be killed.

here, at the tail end of the episode, we learn the rules of vampirism in this world: a vampire cannot be killed by a non-vampire. and a non-vampire BECOMES a vampire by consuming the blood of a believer and also taking a life. it is only here we realize that this woman is not an actual vampire yet, she just appropriates their culture by drinking blood unnecessarily.

mulder's still sleeping in her bed and she's like "you need to leave" and she stabs the wall to make her evil ex think she's killing him. but when they go to break out, mulder ties him up quite handily and he gets in the car to escape with vampire woman. until ANOTHER vampire woman jumps on the hood of their car. and main vampire woman knocks her out for a bit by running into her with said car, which is super effective.

mulder's leaving the place in shambles, his shirt still unbuttoned, wandering down the side of the hill. back at the house, now that we know the vampire rules, main vampire woman says she can finally kill the evil vampire ex. and he's like how!! you haven't had the blood of a believer or taken a life. so. she licks the blood off her hands (unclear if it's hers or mulders tbh) and says she'll take her own life. and drops a match after pouring gasoline.

so. that brings that to an end. and shabby looking mulder sits on a hill as he learns all four in the house died.

the episode ends with him playing with scully's necklace. which i don't even sort of feel like unpacking right now but maybe another time.

probably not, though, because i just didn't like this episode. and yeah, a lot of it comes down to me not wanting to see mulder hook up with people who aren't scully. can you blame me? is it so wrong to have preferences in this world?

but also, narrative wise- do you honestly see the guy fucking off to cali while scully's still missing to deal with an unrelated problem instead of devoting every hour of his life to finding her, like we saw him do in the last episode? you expect me to think he just puts it off for a lil while? the guy who, just last episode, pulled his gun on the ski lift operator to get to the top where she might be a little faster, and then choked his one and only suspect out of fury? you're thinking this is the guy that's gonna go soak up some west coast rays?

and yeah, he was obviously not himself through the episode- very cold and analytical- but c'mon. we all want to bang a vampire. he's not special. i just personally wouldn't do that if my friend were gone. like how is that gonna help the situation. be so for real. time and place!

and also the whole only learning the rules of being a vampire about 5 minutes before they need it to be plot relevant. that annoyed me too.

overall, mulder, like i said, i'm not mad, just disappointed.

let me know what you thought on this episode- i try to not be a hater, but i also understand that hating in small doses can be good for the soul. if it's a widely beloathed episode i'll feel better in my judgement as i join a long tradition of haters who have come before me.

[jils-things]

this feels too soon to say because its still not well over a month that i started uni but like...

im quite happy by how things are going now- it doesn't feel all too restrained unlike my past school years. and apart from that, i feel a lot more independent being able to travel miles away from my home which has been my biggest anxiety as i got older. just the fear of getting lost spooks me a whole lot! even if i'm travelling through a planned route, going all by myself is probably the bravest thing i did this year and i say this as an introvert who doesn't go out all too often

[colorsinautumn]

.

[stellacadente]

i realized how much it scares me that my mind will convince itself of even the ugliest things if i start thinking them often enough and it's... yeah. like i had a good session with my psychiatric rehabilitation therapist i think it was very useful but then at the end i got hit by this feeling of fear... like i'm so scared of myself and how low i can get

[mars-ipan]

overcoming anxiety (through practicing the things that scare you) is so interesting. i used to be horrified of taking up space or alerting other people of my presence. now i'm compelled to tell strangers i like their outfits or hair or earrings- on bad days i tell maybe a quarter of them. do i still overthink it? absolutely. but i call attention to myself to tell someone else my opinion. and with the way they tend to smile and tell me "thank you!" i'm pretty sure it's taken to heart.

i used to be horrified of making phone calls as well. this is one i'm still getting over- i just Don't Like Doing It. i used to have a phone call routine that i still joke about- realize i need to call someone, cry, avoid it for a few days, suck it up, write a script, memorize the script, cry again, final script read, make the call with the script in front of me. and i would be Exhausted by the end of it. i don't cry when i need to call people anymore. i'm even needing scripts less and less- i've found out that people actually won't kill me if i talk a little too fast or stumble on my words. i doubt i'll ever like making phone calls- i especially hate robots (i'm afraid they'll mishear me and direct me wrong or a person will suddenly show up and i won't be prepared)- but i can make them now.

i get overwhelmed really easy. just a thing that happens to me. my brain is really really good at taking one task and breaking it up into thousands of little tasks and it feels like i'm drowning. if i try to make it fewer larger tasks then it starts to feel insurmountable. i was completely lost on how to deal with this (other than avoid until you get that panic attack and can do work in the post-catharsis calm until 6:00 AM) until one night when my dad (who i often meet late at night due to overlapping mental illness symptoms) asked me how to eat an elephant. i looked at him, confused, and he said "one bite at a time." that was way more effective than any other analogy i've seen has been. "light at the end of a tunnel"- i don't feel like i'm moving forward, i feel like i'm scaling a wall. "steps on a trail"- i can see my destination, but it feels impossible to move forward. but eating an elephant? that sums it up perfectly. this huge task which seems impossible at a glance. but it must be done. so you eat the elephant, a bite at a time. every time i'm overwhelmed i repeat that phrase to myself. it hasn't made any major changes yet, but it keeps me calm enough to start before i hit the panic attack, which i'll take.

i was such a perfectionist growing up- i actually thought it was a good thing (school always taught me to strive for perfection). but it made me scared to try new things- if i wasn't immediately good at them, then it clearly wasn't for me. i'm still not great at starting new hobbies, but i try a lot of new things within the hobbies i already have. i test out different ways of making art, i try new puzzle games i don't understand, etc. and the feeling of steady improvement reminds me that i don't need to be good right away. some of the most satisfying moments don't come from immediately being good- they come from achieving that skill over time. i'd like to try to learn to sew soon.

idk it's interesting. i rewire my own brain's fear response by doing the Horrifying Thing enough times for me to understand that no i will not die. and while i'm doing it it feels like nothing is changing. i get so stressed every time- it can actually take a lot out of me (turns out fight-or-flight burns a lot of energy). but i look back at then vs. now and i realize how far i've come, and i can't help but think "huh. neat"

[sschmendrick]

Gotta write a production report for two songs we recorded and I'm gonna have to do at least a third of it for a group of 6 after having done about half of the recording and editing work for one of these two projects...all that cause I still haven't found an internship so I can't just say : do it without me.

It's a little exhausting. I know they will work if I really push them but they'll do it super late and I'll have to revise it when I get back home from the small concert I've allowed myself to go instead of my portuguese lesson (brazilian artist so it's all good my teacher said, I still feel bad) and I'll have to run around tomorrow morning to print it and I'll assume the cost again.

It's...yeah it's exhausting. And my thesis is so far behind, and I still have no internship. I wanna keep strong but man that diploma is slipping away from me. I'm not even sure I have good enough grades at my exams now !

[hella1975]

I'm not done yet but hey are you giving zuko eldest daughter trauma because I'll fucking kill you I read ONE line it's probably the first of what's to come but I'm sending the hate ask now xoxo

ofc i wouldn't do that! he's just fistfighting a saviour complex and is eternally burdened by the responsibility of raising and caring for his sister while simultaneously being a child himself and always putting himself before the worst of the war so that azula doesn't have to all the while growing more and more rage towards the situation until it all comes out in a very cataclysmic scene that i will definitely cry at when writing :)

[lambentplume]

yapping aimlessly tonight

[kimmkitsuragi]

ughhhh i literally cannot take how my classes start tmrw and i will have to work on a stupid project for another whole semester............ *applies for masters programs while saying this*

[dreamyberry]

Anybody else imagines given situations thinking they would be fun but when they become reality they’re an absolute nightmare or embarrassing