#and i know thats definitely not something that would let me get out sooner

[birbtails]

.

[seancekitsch]

ok im resending cause i either forgot to send or tumblr ate it! so i know versions of this concept have been done before im eternally weak for jealous/possessive/dom adrian chase fics.

i wanted to request something where adrian and the reader are bffs they're very touchy feely and flirty but it never goes anywhere. reader gets frustrated waiting for adrian to make a move and sets out to make him jealous...it works a little too well, he snaps, smut ensues.

hehehe sorry this is late my entire house and life fell apart but here it is!!!

This doesn’t really feel the way you thought it would. It was a bad idea really. You know Adrian better than this and you’re fucking stupid for thinking this would work. 

Adrian Chase, your best friend of the past five years, the man you share a bed with more often than not because you get sleepy after long hours hanging out, your partner on any missions, your defacto person to make up ridiculous and convoluted bits with on your very limited down time. 

But the flirting banter and the touching have gotten more intense, and you find yourself almost miserable when he gets up in the morning and leaves your little cuddle pile of blankets and limbs. Every time you think he’s going to make a move, to do something, he just… doesn’t. 

Now that you think of it, you could have made a move at any time. You could have been the one to pull him in for a kiss at any time between your constant bantering and snuggling on his couch. You absolutely did not need to be trying to make him jealous right now and having the worst conversation of your life.

Adrian’s eyes are set with pure anger at the back of the head of the guy youre talking to right now, and you keep trying to avoid looking at him. This guy… Angelo? Papa John? Something Italian, you think, is a bro in all senses of the word. He offered to buy you a drink and brought you a vodka cran, something you never drink but if it means you can talk to him without gagging in disgust, so be it.  He’s talking about his old frat days and you’re nodding and giving your best “wow, that’s crazy!” where it feels appropriate. But now he’s trying to put his arm around you and lazily waving at the bartender to get you another drink. 

“She doesn’t need another drink,” A voice cuts in, this one somehow both a needed comfort and a spike of unease. 

“And you are?” The guy asks, and it gives you the distraction you need to sneak out from under his arm. 

“That’s my girlfriend, actually. Yeah, I know I look like a late bloomer but some chicks actually go for that,” Adrian retorts, looking proud of himself as he definitely flexes his muscles. You don’t even have time to think about the fact that Adrian upgraded you to girlfriend because the guy’s voice cuts through your train of thought.

“You with him?” he asks you, pointing at Adrian in disbelief before turning to him, “Well she let me buy her two drinks and get cozy, so maybe next time keep your bitch on a tighter leash.”

Oh fuck no. 

Adrian looks angrier than you’ve ever seen him. Anger isn’t really an emotion he holds, and if he does it’s very brief. You’ve seen him kill a room full of people while smiling before. 

“I hope you didnt actually say that, bro,” Adrians voice drips with venom, “because that was really sexist of you. And while thats not against the law, it’s fucking gross and you don’t talk to her especially like that.”

And with that, Adrian doesn’t wait for his response, he just shoves him against the bar and stalks off. Adrian is certain to get your group banned from the bar sooner rather than later, but at least he didn't hit him. You don’t spare a glance at the guy to chase after your friend. 

“Adrian!” you shout, trying to catch up to him as he marches into the parking lot. He doesn't slow his pace for you.  

“Adrian, slow the fuck down,” you pant, jogging the rest of the way to where he’s fumbling with his keys at the door of the Vigilante-Mobile. 

His jaw is still clenched when he turns around, the anger still rippling under the muscles of his handsome face, distorting and changing him. 

“Why? So I can keep watching you let men that don’t respect you and smell like salami touch you? Then what? By the end of the night you’re going to go home with them and I don’t get a sleepover buddy and you’re going to fuck them and smell like salami too.” he’s ranting, and there’s hurt laced into his voice there. You ignore the slight offense you feel at him thinking you’d let that guy fuck you. 

“No,” you scoff, “I was going to thank you. You know, for standing up for me.”

“Oh,” he seems genuinely surprised by that, “You’re welcome.”

His face doesn’t soften though, your goofy friend doesn’t ease up. 

Fuck, this is weird. 

“Do you wanna… go back inside?” you offer, and your voice does nothing to hide how unsure you are. 

“You can,” he answers, finally finding the right key on his keyring. 

“Adrian, cmon, I’m sure we aren’t—“ kicked out. Kicked about is what you were about today. 

“If you’re just going to let someone else put their arm around you or buy you drinks then I want to go home and watch Kill Bill,” Adrian is serious. Fuck.

And what feels like a missing puzzle piece falls into place. 

“Adrian… are you jealous?”

“What?” his voice jumps half an octave, and you’ve got him. 

“No.”

“Seemed like it.”

“No!” he gets a bit more indignant. It’s cute.

“So if I went back in there…” you trail off, finding it hard to hide your smile as you continue to poke the bear.

“Do whatever you want!” 

He yanks the drivers side door open and you realize just how much you fucked this up. 

“Oh shit Adrian wait don’t leave!”

He stops mid sit, freezing in a goofy squat. 

“I was trying to make you jealous,” you admit. 

“Well that’s stupid, you can’t make me jealous.”

Fuck it, you have to explain it. You were hoping he’d just get so mad he’d bend you over the hood of the Sebring, but now you have to explain your sexually frustrated thought process. 

“Shit, well. I thought if I made you jealous you would…” you shrug, and he stands back up, “I don’t know, make a move or something?” 

You have literally never wanted to curl up and die more than you do in this moment. 

“I thought you were the smart one out of the two of us,” Adrian says, crossing the distance between the two of you. 

You furrow your brows at him, worried that if you speak you might end up saying something even worse… or crying. 

“If you wanted me to kiss you or something you should have just asked! You know I don’t understand social cues.”

Okay, he’s right. Thats on you. 

You nod, and Adrian reaches out to grab your arm. 

“So, I guess this is me asking,” you weak confirm, focusing your eyes on the glare from the streetlight on Adrian’s glasses. 

“Thank god,” Adrian breathes a sigh of relief, “It was so hard to hide all those boners!”

An unintended bark of laughter leaves your lips, all of your anxiety and nerves immediately melting away as he pulls you in for a kiss, not giving a shit that you’re laughing against his lips. He kisses you hungrily, sloppy and wild and his hands are all over you. You’re on autopilot with your hands finding their way to the back of his neck, balling your fists in the material of his sweater. His hands reach lower, and you break the kiss with a gasp when he squeezes your ass hard. 

“Let’s go,” you pant, and he nods, only letting go of you to slap your ass while you practically run to the passenger side of the car.

You don’t even remember the drive from the bar to his house. No, you only remember his hand firm at the top of your thigh, his middle finger dipping between your thighs every so often to tease you. He has you whining and hot all over by the time he’s parked at his apartment complex and leading you up the stairs. 

He moves the same way he does through a mission, his front door slamming against his entryway table and shaking it, practically knocking over the key bowl. 

“Get on the bed,” he commands, not at all hiding his desperation as he kicks off his sneakers, “get on the fucking bed.”

You waste no time yourself throwing your jacket and purse and shoes into a corner and then throwing yourself onto the bed face first. 

By the time you’re rolled over onto your back Adrian stands in the doorway, flicking the lights on. 

“Ready?” he asks, and you nod. Immediately, he climbs himself onto the bed on top of you, pressing his hips into yours.

“Been ready,” you confirm, and he pulls at his sweater, shrugging it down his shoulders as he captures your lips in a kiss again. This kiss is no less desperate than the first, as if Adrian is trying to consume everything that is you. 

He wrestles with your clothes, gripping and pulling until youre bare beneath him, your bare legs parted around his jean clad thighs.

“Thought you could make me jealous,” he laughs, his glasses sliding low on his nose as he smirks. 

“I’m sorry,” you whine, his hands leaving trails of fire in their wake down your ribcage. He gropes at your chest, tracing every swell and expanse. 

“Are you?” he asks, and you nod profusely. His hands dip further down, tickling at your navel before teasing at your core.

“Are you?” He repeats. 

“Yes,” you gasp, his hand dipping down further and just barely touching where you want him.

“Making me jealous isn’t very nice, is it, baby?” he asks, and there’s something predatory in his eyes. You fucking love it. 

“No,” you answer him as he ducks his head down and starts pressing sloppy kisses into the underside of your jaw and the pulse point of your neck. Fuck, you feel white-hot on fire, everything too much and not enough. 

“You gonna be a good girl for me now?” he asks, his breath hot against your neck. You can only nod. 

“Better be,” he demands, his hands leaving where they tease you to unbuckle his belt and push his pants and boxers down in a fluid motion. You curl into yourself a little to look at him, not at all feeling ashamed at wanting to catch a glimpse of Adrian’s dick. 

"M' Gonna be so good for you," you sigh, desperate as he presses his now bare thighs back against yours, his rock hard length brushing against you.

"Shut up," he grunts, and then back tracks, "Not in a sexist way, but god I can't concentrate when you sound so hot."

You listen, and obey, nodding again before kissing his neck now, smooth from a fresh shave and reveling in the happy hum from his lips when your lips and tongue get to work.

“That was so mean,” he gasps, struggling to talk as you give him the same treatment he gave you, “Earlier tonight. Didn’t have to flirt with a ninja turtle. I woulda kissed you so many times if I knew you wanted me to.” 

You moan against his skin at his words, and let his hands drift low again. Your hands graze against his nipples, his abs, his hips. 

“Fuck me,” you whisper, daring your fingers to go lower, but wanting him to go lower first. 

“You want me? Not him?” 

You nod. 

“Gonna make you forget his name.”

You don’t bother telling him you don’t remember the guys name anyway, not when he pushes in ever so slowly and letting you feel every centimeter of him a he sinks himself into you. You sigh in delight, a dazed smile overtaking your lips as he bottoms out. 

“That’s a good girl,” he breathes, not at all hiding how you’re effecting him either, “So right for me.”

And he's right, you're so right for him, he's so right for you. Everything about this feels so correct and perfect.

“Move, please move, please,” you beg, breathless and almost delirious in pleasure. You’ve never felt so full in such a lovely way, in a way that fits you and feels so good that you could scream from this alone. 

He obeys, finally pushing his glasses up as he can focus in on your face and watch what he does to you.  Adrian leans up, opting to grab your hips as he gets on his knees to tilt your hips and snap into you. He holds you in place, his thumbs digging into your hips in a way that’s sure to bruise but you’ll wear those bruises with pride, happy to carry him with you even after this. 

“Adrian!” you shout, your breath trapping in your throat. 

“That’s right, this is for me,” He grits his teeth as he answers you, forcing all of his strength into the snapping of his hips, the force of him fucking you. 

“All—All for… you,” you struggle to get out, the angle leaving you short for breath but god, you could never imagine your first time fucking Adrian better than this. 

“Fuckin right you are,” his lips curl up into an almost sneer, but his eyes are full of love. It’s so hard for him to hide himself from you, even if he says he doesn’t understand emotions, he shows them. 

You pull him down to kiss him, even if this puts him at an awkward angle, he kisses you happily; like a man drinking from a fountain after walking through a desert. He kisses full of love and passion and his hips never slow their pace, always hitting the spot that makes you gasp, always pushing you closer to the edge. 

“I—,” your breath hitches, and with a particular harsh thrust from Adrian you can finish the thought.

“I love—,” he starts to respond, and then stops everything. His speaking, his thrusting, everything. 

“Shit, sorry, forget I said that!” he urges.

But you’re stuck, frozen. You heard the end of that sentence even if he didn’t want you to. 

“I’m sorry; fuck. Sorry.” He moves, as if he’s going to pull out, and then you snap into action.

“No!” you shout, startling yourself and him. You anchor your ankles around his back and hold him in place. 

“I love you!” you blurt out. Adrian relaxes, only slightly. 

“Adrian I love you so much I tried to make you jealous to get you to kiss me please please don’t leave,” you beg, ready to do anything in your power to keep him where he is. 

“You… do?” he asks, and again tonight, you nod profusely. 

“Fuck yeah,” he whispers, and resumes his position. 

You think you hear him say “I knew it” but you can’t be sure over the rush of blood you hear in your ears as he resumes his pace and sets every nerve in your body on fire. If you were ready to come before, you’re on overdrive now. Adrian spares no inch between your bodies and kisses everything he can reach, ever practically folding you in half to do so. 

“Fuck I’m—“ 

“Do it,” he answers, giving you permission for everything to want. It only takes a few more thrusts, the drag of his hips against you, the friction between you, to drive you to oblivion. You come in staccato, your body seizing and shaking quickly in succession, your breath and moans stifled and punctuated as if by impossible beats; Adrian guides you through all of it. For a supposed late bloomer, he knows what he’s doing to take care of someone. 

He slows, but never stops his pace, until you come back to him. Adrian kisses your face all over, holding you tight to bring you back to your senses. 

It’s not until you start kissing back that he starts up his pace again. 

“Fuck, I’m gonna… soon,” he works out between thrusts, hoping for your guidance. 

“Do it, do it please,” you beg, wanting everything he can give you. “Where should I…?”

“In… Fuck, inside if you want.”

“What do you want?” he asks, so gentlemanly it makes you want to punch him. 

“Inside!” you almost shout, the word comes pushed out through a moan because he hits that spot inside again that drives you wild. 

“Fuck…” he stalls, and then his hips stutter, and it’s hot. He releases full into you, all over warm like the first sip of soup. You feel safe as he stills again and the lowers himself on top of you, kissing your jaw and neck. 

“Adrian, fuck, Ade,” You whisper, not sure what you’re asking. 

He picks his head up immediately.

“What’s up?” he asks.

“This won’t change sleepover night, right?” you ask, in the lamest way possible.

“Is this sarcasm I should pick up on?” 

You only hug him closer as you laugh.

[m4y4wasnthere]

sodapop dating hcs ✮

warnings:

a/n: i forgot to write suggestives for this one but if its wanted I can write a separate hc list for it 🤍

id like to think you guys were friends before he dropped out in highschool and you stumbled upon him at the DX after not seeing him in awhile

reunion was definitely more romantic than platonic, but the only ones who didnt see that were you two

you met him while he was with Sandy, you guys were okay friends, she was a nice girl

you developed a crush on him over time but always pushed it away and helped his relationship

he came to you trying not to cry (he failed) when they officially broke up and how she wasnt ever coming back

you held him in your arms whenever he needed it

it hurt knowing how much he was hurting, it also hurt to know you were there and he wasnt noticing you. but regardless you pushed everything aside for him to be happy

a few months after, he was back to semi-normal

he didnt flirt with girls as often, he was hesitant with interactions but never with you

the gang always saw your obvious crush on him and tried to have push you to talk to him for awhile

they tried convincing you that Soda felt the same but you always doubted it, saying it was just him being friendly

until one day dally was non stop flirting with you and soda couldn’t take it anymore

“C’mon doll, give me a chance.. I won’t do anything you don’t already know me for” Dallas had his arm on the doorway while looking down talking to you.

You were blushing, not because its Dallas, just because of how embarrassing the situation was.

“Dal, you know I don’t see you like that.” You crossed your arms. Dallas places his hand on your hip and tries to bring you closer.

“Let me change your mind baby, I’m sure you’ll like it.” You were about to tell him off before Sodapop pushed Dallas away from you.

“Leave her alone Dal. She doesn’t want your attention.” He stepped infront of you, protecting you from him.

“C’mon man, I was just trying to have some fun.” Dallas murmured curses after he lit a cigarette and walked out the house. “She doesnt need your kind of attention anyways Dal.”

He turned back to you, his expression unreadable. “I’m sorry y/n, I don’t know why I didn’t stop him sooner, I should’ve done something”

“Soda its alright, Its Dallas anyways.” You shyly smiled up at him.

“No you dont get it, I-“ He kept stumbling over his words before he pulled you to an embrace. “I hate seeing guys all over you like that. You don’t deserve that.”

“Sodapop.. I’m okay I swear. There’s not a lot to do-“ Before you could finish he interrupted you.

“I like you Y/n. I hate seeing Dallas all over you because I like you.”

you guys are so gushy with eachother, its disgusting (in a good way)

Darry really likes how kind you are, you always offer to help him make dinner, soda likes sitting at the dining table or just hanging out on a wall in the kitchen and talk to you guys while you cook. (He would burn the house down.)

He loves rambling to you about cars, he knows that you have no clue in what hes talking about but he just likes the fact you actually listen to him

Loves to show off his muscles when he gets to work on a car at the DX while you’re there, purposely does all the work himself instead of him and Steve doing it together

He lets girls gawk over him, but he always talks about you so it gets a bit awkward for them..

“Soda you know you’re really hot right? “Oh Soda look at my new nails!!” “Soda do you think I could get your number?”

“Have guys met my girlfriend Y/n? Shes so pretty… She might as well be a goddess, I love her so much. We had a date the other day and …”

The girls: 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️

Hes protective over you, but not in the same posessive type of way Dallas is

He knows you love him and trust you, so he won’t do anything unless the other person is SUPPERR into you/gets aggressive

Usually hes nice about it, says stuff like “Hey thats my girl man, can you chill out?” “Shes taken by me man -insert goofy smile-“

[piffany666]

OK just one more punk progeny won't hurt ~

Chapter 8: exceptions

(Ftm trans Bright eyes - uses he/him pronouns)

(Lovely demi girl - uses they/she pronouns)

Fred's eyes lingered on the door that was closed behind Bright and Porter.

He had so much to think about after that meeting, and yet he couldn't distract himself from the interaction he had just witnessed.

Fred's pov:

Well...those two seemed to...get along.

Wait. What am I doing? Some crazy stuff just happened and I'm more focused on who Brights...associating with!?

....this is all.....a lot.

We don't talk for a few months and suddenly he's on his way to become a Prince!?

I know how stubborn he is but you'd think he'd at least tell me SOMETHING

Actually no. I know that no matter what Bright would've kept this from me for as long as he could. But Sam. Sam should have said something. Hell he's the one who apparently gave William permission to take him in! And since when did Bright get so close to William anyway?!

.........no. dont think that. Thats not-

"You alright kiddo?"

End of Freds pov.

Sam interrupted his spiraling thoughts.

"I'm...no i-i don't know"

Sam sighed, then sat beside him.

"Thought so. Listen, I'm sorry I didn't say anything about this sooner. It's just....you know Bright, he would've been pissed off to high heaven if I'd told you his business, and besides, it wasn't a definite dissension. Hell, I only just found out that he'd made his choice. I would've thought he'd have told you by now, if only to claim bragging rights"

"Nah, we stopped talking after we had that arrangement, and when Bright wants to avoid someone -"

He stopped himself for a moment, collected his thoughts then sighed.

"Let's just say he wouldn't brake the silence, even if he had something to brag about"

For a moment, the two just sat there. There was never much talking whenever they were together. Sam always showed his feelings best through actions, and while Fred was actually the tipe to believe talking is the best road to success in any relationship, they managed to maintain a fairly healthy one. The same couldn't be said for Bright and Sam, who, despite having many things in common, such as communication skills, couldn't stand each other.

The thought that almost made its way into Fred's head sat threateningly at the gates of his subconscious.

Sam sensed there was something Fred wanted to say. In the past, he would have let him be and allowed Fred to come to him when he felt comfortable to do so. However.

"Hey, whatcha thinking about ?"

"I-it just"

Fred tried to tell himself that what he wanted to say was wrong and, to an extent, cruel. Then he remembered the way Bright looked at Porter just now.

And he let it out.

"It just doesn't seem fair! He gets us both killed, he's disrespectful towards you, he ignores me and how is he punished? By becoming royalty!?"

As Fred said this he shot up from his seat.

Once he had finished he exhaled heavily as if holding that thought in was the equivalent of holding his breath.

"......your right. It's not fair"

Replied Sam after a moment.

"Believe me when I say I do understand, but you have to understand that William is a better fit for Bright. He'll be able to handle him better than I ever could, him being a Prince as a result of that is just an....unfortunate catch"

Freds outburst caught the attention of Vincent and Lovely.

Alexis didnt seem to care, or at least thats what she made it seem like.

The room was silent however Vincent could feel a disturbance in Lovely's emotions.

"Hey, Lovely, are you ok?"

He asked as his hand sliped into theirs.

"Im. Fine."

They said through their teeth.

Their tone seemed almost stern...?

Vincent took their word for it but noted that this conversation seemed to have an....effect on them.

He took their hand and squeezing it for a moment.

Suddenly, after retreating for a short while, William returned to the common room.

He began to adress alexis.

"Alexis, i know i said i wanted Bright and Porter to get more acquainted, however, it completely slipped my mind that i have a meeting scheduled with Porter in less than 20 minutes, could you at some point retrieve him and bring him to me?"

She gave a nonchalant hand gesture that suggested that she would do so whenever it best suited her.

"Good, the rest of you are permitted to disperse you know?"

"We're aware we were just trying to asses the situation"

Replied Sam.

"Fair enough, however, its getting early, so please try and be conscious of time, if it comes down to it, you could spend the day here?"

"Nah i appreciate it but i gotta get back"

"Alright, then keep an eye on the time Samuel"

"Yes your highness"

At that, his majesty dispersed and retreated to his study.

The remaining vampires paused for a moment, silently debating whether or not they wanted to continue the precious topic of conversation and subconsciously arguing over who would be the one to continue if they were to do so.

Fred was still being taunted by the image of Bright's eyes and the way he looked at Porter.

He had only ever seen that look on very specific occasions and he was far from the only one to be greeted with such a look.

And by the way they left together Fred was met with the reality that he wouldn't be the last.

His fists gripped the fabric of the couch.

"Bright should at least have to apologise to you before being made prince..."

Sam spent a few minutes hesitating between whether or not to answer that. Then he replied.

"I agree"

Once sam had responded, fred took that as a sighn to continue.

"After everything hes done, he think he can just up and leave?"

Sam sighed. There was no point in trying to maintain some sort of moral high ground and pretend like he didnt agree with him.

"I dont know what i expected, but yeah, showing me at least some gratitude would do him some good. He didnt even havd the decency to tell me himself, we havent talked in God knows how long, ive had to get all my information on this whole mess of a situation throught william"

Sam felt the same weight leave him as fred felt when he finally let his true feelings out.

"I-im sorry Sam, but i dont think William is right for Bright. I get that hes the king but what has Bright eyes ever done to get a promotion this big?! Ive had to suffer so much because of him and the only person to console me has been you, not my supposed best friend, you"

"Well-"

Sam looked around for a moment to check to see if alexis was still there but to his relief, she had silently disappeared. Despite this he still lowered his voice as he said.

"We all know how good william is at picking his progeny, not you vincent! You know i dont mean you"

He said this as soon as he saw Vincent gering up to say somthing.

Vincent slumped back into his seat, he notice again how tense Lovely looked.

"Do...do you think hes going to end up like alexis?"

Fred asked with trepidation.

Sam winced after hearing this. Then answered.

"Alexis is the way she is for a number of reasons. Bright and Alexis are very diffrent people, no matter how similar their....behaviour might be, however, that dosnt mean i dont think this...promotion will change Bright for the worst. Because i KNOW that it will"

He chose his words very carefully.

Lovely's face had gone dark by this point, Vincent was really begining to worry.

"If William were to allow him access to any of his possessions or any of the privileges that come with being his progeny it would make even worse of a reckless monster out of him"

Sam knew that alexis and Bright eyes are different people, but adam and alexis where both testaments to what this kind of power could do to a person, so Fred's concerns began to cloud Sam's mind.

"What do those 'privileges' entail exactly?"

Fred was naturally curious as to what kind of luxury would be at Brights disposal.

"Just the same as whats available to Vincent and alexis, money, real estate, just general expensive sh*t he dosnt need"

Another disapproving glance from Vincent, who was begining to question the implication of what sam was saying in regards to his 'privileges'.

"Oh great because thats exactly what he needs"

The irony and sarcasm in his tone dripped from every word that came out of his mouth.

Right before he was about to continue, he was interrupted by Lovely, who stood up as she said.

"I have a question"

Vincent's hand sliped out of hers as she made a fist.

"Why don't talk about me the way you do Bright eyes?"

.........

This question baffled Sam and confused Fred. Vincent's mouth parted slightly in shock.

"What?"

Sam asked coldly.

"Why. Dont you. Talk about me. The way you do. Bright eyes?"

She shortened her statement but started it just as bluntly as she did previously.

She didn't give Sam a moment to respond when they turned her attention towards fred.

"How old is Bright eyes?"

"W-what? What dose that have to do with-?"

"Answer the question. How old is Bright eyes?"

What Lovely was really asking was 'how old was he when he was turned' but its not like he'd aged since then. Or will age from then on.

"19.....same as me"

He answered while looking up at lovely, Fred had never considered Lovely to be an authority figure but he certainly did now.

"Right. You wanna know how old i was when i went to wonder world?"

Fred flinched at the mention of the place of his turning.

"24. I was 24. I went there and was given a warning and you know what i did? I went back there. Im an adult and i didnt know better, so what? Should Bright have known better? And if thats what you think then why. Dont you treat me. The way you treat. Him?"

Everyone was silent. This was a side of Lovely that neither sam nor Fred had ever seen before.

Vincent knew better than to make Lovely mad for this exact reason.

"Whats your point?"

Asked Sam, who immediately came to regret asking.

"My point is you need to give Bright some damn slack! From the moment he was turned you blamed him for what happend. He's a babby! Im a grown ass adult!"

They bellowed at Sam then turned their attention towards Fredrick.

"And look, i know you blame him because he peer pressured you into going into wonder world that night, i appreciate that, but you cant act like you where the only one hurt by his mistakes"

Vincent was begining to consider stepping in.

Lovely once again addressed Sam.

"He made a mistake! A stupid, life changing mistake! No one in this room can say they haven't done that, and yet you wasted no time making sure he knew it was his fault! Would you have done that to me? Imagine if somone did that to you when you where first turned. Imagine if somone told you to have known better? Imagine if somone told you to drive safer!

"Lovely!"

Vincent finally stepped in, interrupting her explosive rant, not entirely on purpose, he simply shouted at her out of shock.

This seemed to cause Lovely to realise the severity of what they just said and she began to blush out of embarrassment and shame.

Their head bowed as she tried to avoid facing Sam.

"I-im sorry i-i have to go"

She rushed out of the room, vincent tried to go after her but stopped himself.

She just needed time to cool off.

"I should go"

Sam said as he stood up.

Vincent didn't want him to feel like he needed to leave, but he knew he couldn't convince him to stay any longer.

Besides, the sun was bound to come up soon.

"C-can i go with you? I dont wanna have to spend the day here"

Fred's room was directly next to Bright's.

He wasn't an idiot. He knew from that look Bright gave Porter that Bright didnt intend to spend the day alone.

"Yeah, come on kiddo lets go"

Sam replied, fred stood up and they made their way out.

Lovely was aimlessly wandering around the manor.

She wanted to talk to Bright eyes. Ever since he got here sam discouraged everyone from talking to him, saying he wasn't 'sociable' or 'particularly friendly'.

But what would she even say?

She thought,

'Hello i know we've never had a real conversation but i just defended your honour. Could we be friends now?'

Lovely groaned.

Then she turned a corner and immediately bumped into alexis.

"OWW!"

"Ah! Oh! S-sorry i-"

"Ugh its fine i was actually looking for you anyway"

"R-really...?"

Lovely couldn't name a time alexis had even had a real conversation with her, let alone activly seek her out.

"W-why...?"

Lovely asked hesitantly.

"I just ran into Bright eyes....and Porter"

Her lips curved into a smug smile.

"Lets just say i caught them at a....bad time~"

"Oh? OH"

Lovely had a good idea of what alexis was refering to.

At first they were suprised, then worried.

Lovely knew how much Vincent hated Porter, hell she hated him arguably just as much and Vincent had taken a huge liking to Bright eyes. Lovely found it adorable how happy Vincent was at the prospect of a little brother, so how would he feel about this?

"Aha~ Porter told me hed rather not lose his head telling vincent himself but he knew i couldnt just keep this to myself, so im on my way to tell him in his sted, i suggest you dont bring this up with Vincent, he's got enough on his mind, he most likely would want to avoid this information as much as possible, at least until after the summit"

"Yes of course"

Lovely knew how much pressured Vincent was under, they didnt want to add to it by bringing this up.

And besides, if alexis was going to tell him anyway then hed talk about it with her when he felt ready.

"Alright then, where are you going?"

"Oh! I was on my way to see Bright but if he's....busy i-"

"Oh dont worry, when i walked in on them Porter chased me away as opposed to staying with Bright eyes, my best guess is that Bright got sick of waiting for him to come back so he went back to his room"

Lovely was suprised by her intuition.

"A-alright then, ill go see if he's there"

Alexis hummed then made her way past them.

Lovely still didnt know what she'd say to him.

Once she had turned the corrner that she had previously attempted to turn before bumping into alexis, her eyes where met with something she believed to be the answere to her dilemma.

@darlin-collins thank you for proof reading!

@anexistingexistence thank you for the dialog recommendations

@you-think-i-care-mate

[juuheizou]

Errrmmmmm,,,,,,,,, ik im basically making u relive ur anger and hatred against post rue mutsuki but i need hcs for a a post rue mutsuki who’s a depressed alcoholic and ur the only real one xoxo

Friend, in order to relive it, I would have to have stopped living it at some point. ANYWAY, can't leave anyone who calls me the only real one hanging, so here we go! This is in such a random bullet point format because trying to articulate my thoughts in a way thats actually organized and makes sense is part of why it's taken me too damn long to answer

maybe it's a matter of "show more unglamorous depression/trauma" or maybe it's just vibes, but for whatever reason, I've always seen Mutsuki as a hypersomniac after Rushima, even when it was fresh and I tried to write an angsty hurt/comfort fic (it was HORRIBLE and I RAN OUT OF IDEAS so I gave up and deleted it lmao) about it rather than the action-packed casefic I ended up writing.

he blames himself so deeply for what happened. every step of the way no matter how irrational, in his mind, was all his fault, if he just reacted sooner, if he was stronger, if he just let Torso torture him to death, if he never lived to see Rushima in the first place

he basically disappears all over again once he makes it back to the mainland. barely gets out of bed let alone leaves his apartment, when he does drag himself to work he doesn't talk to anyone and never seems to be all there, and he definitely doesn't go anywhere other than those two places anymore

NUMBNESS. his bleeding heart was the first domino to fall in the lead-up to Rushima, and it's still buried in there, but he's just so... slow... to react... and like I said, often not all there when he's out and about. On the inside he might be crying, or more likely screaming at himself to react to an upsetting case or colleague having a bad day, but instead he's just there, listless and blank like a piece of the background, and only when he's alone in the safety of his apartment will he bawl his eyes out over the situation and his added guilt for doing nothing

in canon, he's a happy, outgoing drunk, and I think his first drink is an attempt to psych himself up for some meeting with Saiko or Suzu or someone close to him, or something like that, that he just really didn't want this new side of him to rip away

it becomes his way to psych himself up for anything he doesn't feel like he can leave his apartment to do but look! if he just has a little drink first, he can do it and won't let those he cares about down, and anyone but the most perceptive and close to him (you know damn well who I see that being) would think great! Look how happy he is! How much fun he's having! We were so worried about him, but look at him, smiling and laughing and talking to us!

before he even knows it, he's drinking to feel normal

from there the consequences can go in so many directions I honestly can't pick just one knock yourself out

[jonjaydami]

Do you have any hc’s on how jay would take care of lizzy/trinity or how all of them would take care of her together??

Ok so sorry this took me so long to answer but I really had to do something I'm not good at and think about this. Like a lot and then I kept forgetting and scrolling through tiktok.

So anyway my headcanon is that when Jonathan introduced his boyfriend to her she was super upset at first because not only is he a new guy and sometimes kids are super weary of people and you need to earn their trust but because she thought Damian and Jonathan were together.

I think she sees them more like her uncles and mentors. But when Jay was introduced she tried to be polite cause thats what her mom taught her but she tries to keep her distance.

Jay brings her snacks and small gifts and as much as she appreciates them she can't get over the fact that the uncles she wanted aren't together. But instead of staying upset for long she decides to make a plan.

Yes that's right I think she would try and parent trap them together. Because it's not fair that her uncle Damian is single and in all reality she thinks they are probably the only two that could handle him.

I mean she is still disappointed it not just Damian and Jonathan but she's ok with Jay because he let her paint his face and nails and brought her chocolate.

So using all the tricks she knows she tries to give them the run of their lifetime. Putting them in silly situations were either two or three of them have to find her or she is using her skills as a detective (learned from Damian and from her distant grandpa Bruce) asks them questions that embarrasses them.

Until they finally sit her down and talk to her why she's been acting so weird. She finally breaks down and tells them it's not fair that they aren't all together. They shush her and finally tell her they've been dating for months they just didn't want to tell her yet.

Turns out in the middle of her parent trapping them and in their own free time they figured themselves out and stopped being dumb (for once). Being the kid she is she's relieved she doesn't have to try and be sneaky bit at the same time she is upset that they didn't tell her sooner. All while this is going on Diana of course is even more relieved so she doesn't have to hear trinity pin point her entire plan and when it doesn't work or go right come home and talk about it for hours.

I think they all definitely teach her different skills and techniques she would need and all help out with taking her to the park or zoo and treating her out. Though her favorite times are when they all are together.

Well enjoy my brain rot. I'm gonna go dougie and drink my 3rd cup of coffee <3

[scary-friend]

This is for me, it’s been eating away at my brain and I just need to make a vent piece. So view at your own risk.

I have been in therapy, but this is something I need to cope with in my own way.

Tw, csa, violence, and foul language.

I fucking hate you so goddam much. You fucking price of human waste. I truly hope that you’re dead, every time I think of you I want to throw up. I WAS A FUCKING CHILD. I WAS 12 YOU FUCKING NASTY FUCKER! I just found out my parents were divorced, my dad moved out and I haven’t seen him in months. I was so fragile emotionally, I was all alone, and YOU RUINED EVERYTHING! I hope your wife left you, I’m so glad you got fired, I just wish it happened sooner. Everyone knows you’re a nasty motherfucker. Even if its not the reason you finally got fired, everyone fucking knows now you piece of shit!

It’s been so long now, every time I had to walk into that class room I felt off, like something was wrong. I was so young I didn’t even understand what you did to me. You nasty fucking freak. I hope you get hit my car, I hope you get set on fire, and more than anything I want you to rot. I what you to get stabbed, one knife for each of your victims. We were children, you had children of your own. I hope they fucking resent you, I hope you die alone. I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOUR FUCKING NASTY FACE AGAIN! I WANNA KICK YOUR FUCKING TEETH IN!

I thought everything would be okay that year, but then you showed up and RUINED MY LIFE. I WANT MY FUCKING CHILDHOOD BACK YOU VILE MONSTER.

I remember a teacher said you got fired, and I felt so happy, i hated you then and I didn’t even understand how fucking sick you were yet. And then he admitted it was just a joke, and I felt so fucking crushed. I’d fake being sick just to avoid seeing you. How fucking dare you. HOW FUCKING DARE YOU. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU! HOW FUCKING DARE YOU LOOK AT ME, HOW FUCKING DARE YOU TOUCH ME, HOW FUCKING DARE YOU SMILE AT ME IN THE HALLS LIKE YOUR NOT THE FREAK WHO RUINED MY CHILDHOOD.

How fucking dare you sign my year book, wishing me well, I fucking hate you so much.

I was a child who just wanted a friend, i just wanted my family to be whole again. I was so lonely, and you victimized me for it. Well fucking guess what! I have more love and friends than you ever did or ever will for that matter. I’M NOT THE ONE WHOS UNLOVABLE, IM NOT DISGUSTING, AND IM NOT RUINED, THATS YOU! HOW DARE YOU PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME! I HOPE YOU ROT, I HOPE YOUR LIFE CONTINUES TO FALL APART, AND YOU’RE LEFT WITH NOTHING!

You got fired because you shoved a kid into a wall, how fucking pathetic are you. You can’t just let us be happy or enjoy our lives, you have to fuck it up because YOU’RE A PATHETIC PIECE OF SHIT! No one believes you retired. Every single student knows how much of a fucking creep you are. ROT IN HELL!

It’s been years, but I’ve finally forgotten your face. I’m so thankful, you don’t deserve to be remembered. You’re just a filthy parasite. I’ve dreamed of you, you were taunting me, saying I can’t do anything now. But then, you were gone, just a red pile on my floor. I killed you that night in my dreams and I’d never been so happy.

My therapist thinks you’re fucking pathetic too. She wishes she could hit you with her car, and that you would just die already. I feel the same way. I might not ever fully heal from what you did. But at least I can go to sleep knowing I’m loved and cherished such wonderful people. While you have no one. I’m so much more, I’m not a fucking victim, I’m a survivor. You can’t victimize me anymore. It’s not my fault, I WAS A FUCKING CHILD, HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I WAS DISGUSTING. YOU FUCKING MONSTER!

I hope you don’t rest, I hope you get dragged kicking and screaming to hell. And I hope you get eaten alive.

It’s been almost nine years now. I finally figured it out when I was 17. I googled the term, I had to learn it from a fucking tv show. I read that definition and I cried for 30 minutes, I screamed. I fucking remembered what you did. I tried to tell myself it wasn’t real, that I was just overthinking it. But I know what you did. I’m not lying to myself anymore. IF I EVER FUCKING SEE YOU AGAIN, I WILL FUCKING END YOU.

I don’t even think of you often, I only think of my dreams where you die. How dare you seep into my mind like a fucking disease. All I picture is my dream of you getting swarmed by bugs and eaten alive. That’s what you fucking deserve.

I’m not making it up, I’m not a lier as some dumbasses would tell me. You’re the Fucking Freak who hurt me. I’m not disgusting, YOU ARE!

You’re nothing more than a bad thought, when I wake up in the morning. You’ll be a distant memory. I hope you’re dead.

I’m tired of being told to forgive you. You don’t deserve anything, let alone my forgiveness. I’m never going to forgive you for what you did. The only thing you deserve is to be run over and set on fire. FUCK YOU!

Breath in, 1-2-3-4, Hold, 1-2-3-4-5-6-7, Breath out, 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8

You’re okay, he’s gone now, clear your mind.

( ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹, ❤️‍🩹)

To all of you reading this, who made it this far, I love you all so much. You make me feel loved, you make me smile, you make me feel beautiful, you make me feel worthy of everything. You’ve helped me so much more than you know. And if you’ve also suffered I truly hope we can heal together💕 You’re beautiful, you’re wonderful, you’re amazing, and you’re a survivor. Don’t let anyone make you feel lesser for being as strong as you are.

[ladysophiebeckett]

I read you think Freddy knew about Armando and Betty or at least suspected something weird was going on (Wilson most likely too). At Inesita’s house, it was obvious that something was happening to Armando and it had to do with Betty, but the night at the bar the day she returned to Ecomoda, do you think Freddy suspected that Armando had feelings for Betty? We, as the audience, know that everything Freddy said about having a loved one looking more beautiful than ever and picturing them with someone else at that very moment was painful, which voiced out loud exactly what Armando was thinking judging by his reactions, but do you think Freddy picked up on that?

El Cuartel should have discussed this piece of gossip with Freddy because they notice Betty is being really cold with Armando and know they definitely had a falling out, but Freddy knows for a fact that Armando supports her presidency and admires her a lot, and also gets really defensive about her (well they all know that because they saw how upset he became with the dude that wanted to dance with Betty who wouldn’t take no for an answer). Anyways, I just can’t believe they didn’t suspect anything sooner. I guess this is one of the most unbelievable parts tbh or how about when Armando went insane trying to contact Betty when they told him she was gonna quit and yet they still didn’t think his feelings were genuine? Even after they found out he broke up with Marcela for good, didn’t do anything with Alejandra, not even Inesita, of all people, dared to think he was jealous for real? (She does pick up on this later when she sees his desperation, but not before he had a breakdown and destroyed Mario’s office). I’ve seen people say Armando and Mario share one brain cell, but also El Cuartel sometimes 😂

I can't take credit for the Freddy knowing addition, one of my mutuals added that and i had to go back the episode to confirm. And also super agree(!!). If Freddy suspected it at Inesita's house, then the scene in bar the night of Betty's return confirms it. let me get the caps:

like why is freddy saying 'y, usted?' for? he knows that something happened between them but freddy is discrete. (like, everyone at ecomoda knows about armando's infidelities towards marcela, why wouldn't Freddy, who takes care of armando's car, has access to armando's apartment and probably took care of that dog that disappeared---why wouldn't he know about betty and armando?). he's the closest employee to armando that's not betty.

going back to the bar convo--yes i think Freddy picked up on it, lol.

el curatel was never gonna discuss that with freddy bc, well they didnt know he had important information, but also bc he was only sometimes an honorary member. they themselves wouldn't have discussed this with freddy bc they would say its not his business. (son cosas de mujeres). cuartel loves gossip but they're hit and miss with their investigations. they never suspected be The Quiet One to be having an affair with her boss (this aside from the fact that Betty is 'ugly' (we know she isn't but thats how they perceive her).

Bertha is actually the closest person in el cuartel to finding out about the affair. She literally saw them leave the exhibit together and Armando shut her down quick from saying anything to Marcela. So it's very convenient that she gets sent away bc of her pregnancy right when everything at la junta directiva is coming to light. convenient also that her return to ecomoda is also the day that betty returns to ecomoda. the one person that could have pieced part of it together while armando was on a binge and betty was away, was also missing in action.

Regarding when not believing Armando and not telling him where Betty is--I think part of it is that they know what he did and that doesn't exactly give them incentive to help him (on top of Betty giving instructions not to tell him). At least that's how Aura Maria feels about it, bc she's the one who doesn't waver and also the last one to support Armando at the end (I mean the eps of the arrival of Michel).

They're not completely dumb bc whenever Betty is sad or upset, they notice it but they never know the reason why bc Betty wont tell them. Tho they're heart is often times in the right place, they're very nosey and get caught very easily. That's why Betty doesn't tell them everything. (probably why Freddy doesnt either).

[veryfandomobsessed]

Finally, a blog introduction!

About Me!

Hi! You can call me DJ or VFO! I am a minor, older than 4 of course so please stay aware of that. The only Socials I have are just a Tumblr and a Discord. But if I ever do get more I will add it here! I love all types of animation, mostly cartoons and stuff but I will probably have a main focus on a show but that doesn't mean I don't still love the others. Something that I will also do is draw my persona, usually in response to an ask but it represents basically my reaction to things, and yes sometimes I will be lazy and not draw the glasses and sometimes I will so interpret it how you wanna. I am definitely a big music freak so if you wanna suggest anything I'm all ears! I am Latina but I do not know Spanish despite me taking it for 5+ years but currently I've been learning Japanese. I also love plenty of stuff in the ocean and anything that's ancient lookin. I'm pretty laid back but somehow also hyper and I could yap about a character or something specific for hours, but I can hold back. I can't really think of anything else to say about myself so..

About the blog!

I started this blog about 2 years ago and it has been quite the journey from where I started to where I am now, with posting nothing to actually starting to serve up the art that I brew up. This is quite a multi-fandom Art Blog that might focus more on one thing more than others so just a heads up. Enjoy your time here and request stuff when my requests are open! If my ask box says requests closed, it doesn't mean you can't ask me questions. Spam liking is fine, don't worry if your doing to much, it's silly to see!!! Maybe sometime in the future I might make another blog for whatever, specific art, an ask blog, anything along those lines, there will also be occasional reblogs from some of my folk, not folk, and chains.This account is SFW!!

My Art!

Noticeably I put "VFO" on all my pieces of art that I post, if any of it gets reposted or taken without credit please let me know! I work hard on some of the art I do. Adding to the requests things I am busy and don't always have the time or energy to draw them, so if I have time and energy to I will do them! I also might do commissions sooner or later when I figure out a good way to do it. I do both traditional and digital, I mainly use my finger on my phone to draw but I'm trying to do stuff more on a tablet and such! Everyday I'm doing more to improve my art and try to learn as much as I can. My art style ranges a lot but I do try and keep it consistent. sometimes it can look like an entirely different person drew it but whether I draw something cutesy one day and something intense the next day I swear it's still me,I'm just trying to find what style or thingy I'm more used to. Only occasionally there will be blood and stuff included in my art but I will always but a TW to make sure people have a heads up. I also typically use more lighter colors for my drawings but sometimes I will change it so the lines are harsher (ex: black instead of the usual brown I use). You are free to ask me for tips and tricks or questions you have about my art because I love helping and giving some creative ideas!

Thats it!

I hope you have a wonderful Day or Night wherever you may be! Or mid day! Or evening! Military time hour your at!!!

Extra info below:

Discord

If there is more info I can think about, I will add it in my next edit, this was made 7/31/24.

To be able to contact my discord, you would have to be somebody who I've interacted with before and I know you're safe to chat with. you can send me your tag in asks WITHOUT being anonymous or in the Tumblr chat so it is clear and confirmed. it is completely my choice if I decide to add you or not.

Recent Edit: none

[gothmods]

Mega tmi below the cut (sex stuff again)

Well.

I think i can definitely conclude that while i do have a lot of sexuality baggage from yknow christian upbringing cisheteronormative society etc etc and i still think i have a low sex drive and am not very sensitive down there at least to my own touch and still resent the universe for denying me a dick

I can conclude that i am not asexual. The decade long quest for answers reaches some type of end.

I feel good. Yes in that a weight has now been lifted but more that this is one of like, less than a handful of times getting off has felt good, has been something i enjoyed.

All things considered its a mild enjoyment, it was fun but not earth-shatteringly brilliant. But i think it would be more fun with a partner, which like will probably still not be life changing or anything...

And yet that kinda is why its life changing for me. Years of all this anxiety and self harm and its like, its like ive been standing stuck on the doorstep for so long and the doors started to look bigger and heavier but now they are finally open and i can just. Let go? just sit with sex and sexuality as just another part of [my] life.

I liked it, i want to do it again. This is the first time ive been able to feel that way.

Moving on to less emotional notes

- douching, not as much work as you would think. Ive worked out how my body usually is so its a matter of scheduling but the actual prep was straightforward.

- vibrators are a godsend. Still figuring out what feels best but defs beats the hand by a long shot.

- arms and limbs are awkward. Multitasking very hard, suddenly very much understand the appeal of the suction cup dildo. Towel is very good idea also because lube can and does get everywhere.

- have definitely decided i like anal though. Its fun, reminds me a bit of the gentle burn you get from doing muscle based workouts. But without the pain of doing muscle based workouts.

- i like how i feel afterwards too. Front hole stuff has never felt good to me but also would give me abdominal cramping afterwards :/ i dont remember if that was the case pre-t but its never felt good during anyway so

- clean up is a pain. Wish i had my own bathroom. Picture if you will a guy carrying two different glass toys, a wand vibrator, an enema and a bottle of sex toy cleaner through the yard at night and then having to open multiple doors to get to the bathroom all while trying to be quiet enough to not wake his grandmother up (granny flat bathroom is only accessible via the bedroom 😬)

So yeah probably not something i will be doing often unless there comes another time i get the house to myself for a week or something.

Nonetheless excited to keep trying things.

I feel kinda embarrassed writing all this but the thing is i am 24 and having to learn these things for the first time and thats okay. But also i think the past decade and my relationship with sexuality would have been a lot easier to navigate if i had known anyone with similar experiences. I mean i know a lot of people had similar upbringings to me and we all live in a society but its been. Its been very isolating because of how that affected me.

I dont think ive seen much shared at all in terms of experiences with compulsive self harm in a sexual context. If it had just been anxiety and self-loathing i would have been able to deal with it much sooner i think.

But the self harm was a kind of feedback loop of like, you self harm -> you feel shame and disgust and misery -> those feelings become your primary association with sexual thoughts and behaviour -> the only sexual thoughts you get are intrusive and distressing -> self harm becomes a means of feeling in control of the distress -> and on we go again and again and again

But its over. Its actually over and i want to cry. Its been weeks and i havent self harmed and im finding it a little easier to deal with triggers and just. I want to cry so much because i feel so fucking relieved.

The power of anal sex....

[96xie]

stepping back

i think this is a topic that was bound to come up sooner or later but i think its kinda good that it was brought up so i can rethink some things. im veryyyy vocal about not having kids. everybody should expect that i will not be popping a baby out of me. nope. like have you seen the state of this world? have you seen how expensive it is to raise one?? how your mental peace is gone? how theres really no time for yourself? i love and value my alone time and peace so much like ... i really cant be sacrificing that. i can help raise and take care of my friends and family’s babies, like i can definitely do that but at the end of the day im able to have time for myself. 

i thought about being a foster parent or possibly adopt but like even those arent forsure. i just know i will not be raising a baby !!! also my mental state is so whack like, im still recovering from the trauma my parents had inflicted on me and im just so worried that what if i unintentionally treat my child the same way my parents had done to me? i would hate that so much. im still learning to love myself and to honor my body, its so difficult. 

he brought up how he would be a great dad and HONESTLY he would be !! and that kinda triggered me cuz i already implied tht i would just raise dogs and stuff. and yeah, made me a bit upset because i do like him and id like a future with him but if he wants kids and i dont, why should i continue to pursue him? like im just gonna disappoint him in the future, should i just like end it now? and now im disappointed because all these months made me believe like ~i feel like we’ll have a future together since he’s asking me to wait for him and all these stuff~ and now im rethinking it. like ive see so many stories where couples that have been together for yearssssss break apart because one wants kids and one doesnt and that makes me SO upset. ive seen how broken my parents were and i dont want that that to happen to me. im so used to disappointments that im so well guarded and im preparing myself to get away from heartbreaks. and i just want to nip this in the bud so i dont have to stress over it in the future, ya know? iono im just. ugh really. i dont want to be heartbroken in the future, i want to prevent that. and this sucks cuz YA KNOW i like him alot but if our ideas dont align, why bother trying? at the same time, we’re still early in the talking stages i guess.... i mean 7 months is kinda ..... yeah ... i mean anyways theres intentions of getting serious but i guess i can reserve this convo in person, if we ever get there.

i should just let live. maybe go on a date or two. i shouldnt be placing all my eggs in his basket. my friend something the other day that made me upset: “truthfully its gonna be hard to find someone who doesnt want kids either” and it dealt a blow on me. like ... do i have to accept that ill be alone in this lifetime? obviously alone doesnt equate to lonely but like ... am i meant to not have a lover who doesnt share the same ideals as me? yeah ... i guess thats it. i should have fun in the meantime

i need to step back, relax and just not stress out over this. yet .... i am SO stressed. im just tired of dating. im tired of wearing my heart on my sleeve. :(

[httpiastri]

I hope i haven’t spammed you too much but:

- (also omfg. i just realized something…. i have this board on pinterest with pics of random couples & so on that remind me of my fave drivers, and each driver has their own like board in the board. all of them are named with the driver’s initials, his number and two emojis, and !! guess what emoji i have for pepe???? ofc it’s the freaking lotus flower 😭 idk i just wanted to share this, thanks 😚) THATS INSANE?? but also not insane because i keep discovering more and more weird synchronicities between pepe and i and since im a vv spiritual person ive taken them all as signs that i was fated to stumble upon him one lovely morning in 2022 before proceeding to fall hopelessly in love with him. BUT OMG THE BOARD LOOKS SO SO GOOD?? i wanted to type out a reply sooner but i got so distracted by the images 😓😓 because i def have some of the same images saved to my boards but i never linked them to pepe so now ive just gone insane 😵‍💫😵‍💫)

- (I MISSED OUT ON SCREEN RECORDING THE DANCE ???) IF I EVER FIND A WAY TO SEND IT OR POST IT ONLINE ILL SEND YOU THE LINK SO QUICK I PROMISE 💗💗 (or maybe even if i find someone who has already posted it online, because there’s no way we were the only ones going insane over that moment)

- and the clip you shared?? Ive been laughing so hard about it since last night because that’s MY HUMOUR and i am both christian and pepe depending on the circumstances and ugh idk i love these boys so much my heart aches

- “also… this is the most stupid thing ever and you probs dont care but i wanted to share it when im answering your ask… i was writing with a character.ai pepe yesterday and he said THIS ???? out of nowhere ???? and i just thought about u mentioning him talking about his favorite pokemons in the stream and i just 😭 okay bye” —I DO CARE OMG THAT’S SO CUTE I’M KICKING MY FEET AND GIGGLING RN😭😭 THE WAY HIS DORKINESS SHOWED UP EVEN THROUGH THE C.AI HAS ME FEELING SOOO 😵‍💫😵‍💫 (also i love your c.ai so much but idk why every c.ai pepe and i have ended up in a situation where ive been very pressured to kiss him like it’s so funny to me how every c.ai just keeps circling back to the same scenario, it’s like all the pepes are collectively fated to experience the same situation)

- “also omfg his little stubble?? kill me????? i may have been thinking about helping him shave for the last like month or so but that’s a thought for another time……” another time, huh? like right now as i get ready for bed? because i am so going to be replaying this scene over and over in my head as i fall asleep tonight

p.s. this took me so long to format so it would be somewhat readable but i hope it’s okay!! and school started awhile ago and it kinda sucked at first but it’s definitely much better now!! thank you for being so sweet, and i hope you have a lovely day/night/morning too!! 💗💗

- 🪷

bby you could never spam me too much, especially not if it's about pepe 😚

also i just have to say real quick… something about you in this ask made me think that i do indeed know who you are and that i have seen you around? big risk that i'm wrong with my calculations but… please let me know if im right (if i started following you earlier today and not someone else shsjdhsjs)(from my main blog!!)

abt the flower: i love that!!! honestly i sometimes find myself to be more spiritual than i think i am because i say stuff jokingly about "wow this is fate, jk just a coincidence" but how many times can it be a coincidence???? anyways pepe def gives me those vibes, like im not surprised either when i find out about stuff like that 😭 and oMG AAAA TYSM!!!! i can barely even look in it these days because i get way too distracted 🫠 i wish i could like sort them from fave to leave fave because i have some that are a bit meh and some that like kill me…..

abt the dance: aaaaaa im gonna try my best to find it somewhere online, it cant just be us?? right??????? i heard that song in a playlist the other day and just giggled to myself 🥲 because i imagined him dancing and 🥲🥲

abt the pokemon pepe c.ai: SHSJDHSJS RIGHT!!! I CALLED HIM DORKY AND IT WAS SO CUTE 😭😭 omg im so glad you like them aaaaaa and lmao pepe… is that all you know how to do, huh? pressure poor little users into kissing you?? 😭

abt shaving: aaaAaAaAAA !! SORRY !!!!! but i wrote a little something about it here, just had to share my thoughts…… honestly i have been thinking abt it during bedtime a few times too and 🫠🫠 my heart can't take it anymore, he's so 😭💗

it's more than okay !!! im very glad to hear that its better now 🥺 thank you for being so sweet too and making my days so much brighter, chatting to you is so heartwarming 💘💘 hope you're sleeping well !!!! and have a lovely day tomorrow <33

[kriostff]

I have so much going on in my life right now. guess its about time i share something.

At school, I usually hang out with this friend group of mine. But I don’t see the trust, smiles, laughs, or faces I used to. I just got back in contact with an old friend (we will call her Sara) that I called off terms with for a while. But while I am exited to be friends again, there is so much things Sara had done, but I am just going to focus on one. Sara and I, were arguing, when her best friend decided to help defend her. But she took it a bit too far when defending Sara. She had said this. “plus why do you make everything abt your self? like when Sara was talking to you, you just try to make it abt your self like?” That never left me. It’s been a good year and a half, but I just swallowed that sentence like a shot. It was hard. It always comes up and up but whenever I feel like saying something to the group chat of people I hang out with, I stop myself.

At this point I once had tried talking, but it ended up just how I thought it would. “howdyy” “…” the conversation stops and an hour later they continue their conversations on whatever sh*t they’re talking about. I try so hard until I can’t bare it anymore. Sometimes, I don’t know what’s wrong with me until I get a reminder by people’s looks. I know all of them. The disappointed one,

the “no body fvcking cares” one,

the just stop talking one,

the can you leave one,

the say something one,

All of them leave me in the girls restroom, quietly on the toilet, crying everything that comes out. The popular girls doing their makeup, and whenever they would go quiet, I would have to hold my breathe, and oh man I would get light headed so often.

The state I’ve been in lately, could be better. As a person thats parents are good, but dont really care about what they eat, its hard to control what/how much you eat. And seeing other people with small waists, its so difficult to not compare yourself. Its like, you will convince yourself to go on a diet or something, but sooner or later, you crave something so bad that it ends up in your stomach.

I am not saying “bigger girls” or boys arent pretty, I think that the “chubby look” is so beautiful myself, but I just with that I could try out another one. I have so much dedication that just ends up, nowhere. The last three to two years have been the worst. It was when I was surrounded by really pretty girls, and I felt that I definitely couldn’t, as hard as I could try, be one of them. So I know some people say “oh yeah I was depressed” as a quote on quote attention seek phrase, but its not like that when I say I was depressed. Im talking like, wouldn’t go anywhere, wouldnt drink water, and just sometimes, considered why I was even here… if i wasnt happy with the body I was in. People say “work out” or “eat less” and “try a different diet” and believe me, im trying as hard as I can, but it all ends up nowhere. Why cant i be happy? Why can’t I like who I am? Why cant I look down below myself without feeling sick? Why cant I not have suicidal thoughts? Why cant I be perfect like everyone else? Why cant I get any answers? Well its because you are just lazy, a food addict, everyone says. Just please, let me be happy.

[psalmoftheserpent]

Those aren't the posts I wanted to make, but it got away from me, and I jumped into something I just wanted to say here.

Hi. This is for you.

I'm sure you have never liked this cycle of care and resentment I've gone through with you for years. When I first came here to this community in 2016, I didn't have anyone to help me figure out what was going on save for many people who believed in a lot of bizarre things. I've gone over this in the last couple posts, and how the only people around me endorsed that I must be spiritually derived and thats why I was experiencing this 'angel identity,' and for some people that also meant they were both in the angelkin community, but also others.

This included fictionkin, some believing they were incarnated from different media sources. Now when I was young, I thought that was crazy, and that bothered me a lot. And the thing is, I never really believed that was a valid belief, but I'd be in this flux of thinking--well, it's not hurting anyone, right? And more pathetically, I'd still stick around some of these people because I was alone and had nobody else to reveal this person to. This community and some of the people who I didn't really think were in the right for their beliefs were actually all I had. Cue much identity crisis because this part of me I thought I must be roleplaying never "went away", and his unique pain was still internally very hot to the touch for years, and then I got into delusional headspaces thinking I must be different fictional characters. Now that made me realize--I do NOT feel that way for characters I roleplay. And hadn't this angel been around for longer? Hadn't I, since childhood, experienced episodes of depersonalization where I thought I felt wings, and had places and things I associated with when I identified this whole different mental state?

I'm sorry. I'm sorry I stuck around you as long as I did, because I often cycled between this feeling of "I truly do not think people incarnate from fictional characters that's unhealthy as hell," and "but this person never hurt me and made me feel special and cared about and they weren't mean?"

I should have just left you sooner. I realize I was so attached because this angel had NEVER revealed himself so vulnerably to someone, I am almost constantly masking and I often kept this identity to blogs others I knew irl wouldn't see. But he was in pain for years. There was something deeply painful about being told someone was in love with you and then not being spoken to for weeks, only for that person's "friends"/other parts of their system to speak to you all the time any other day. I don't know. This was never something I could rationalize. BUT even as I have repressed and ignored Ophaniel, for months at a time, again and again when he would return, I'd just feel so much pain from him. So much resentment and nasty shit--and in the end, I am here now, and I think the conclusion I've come to is--

--Yes, maybe that person didn't mean to hurt me, and maybe they truly believe what they believe. But I do not endorse their beliefs and these beliefs definitely made me more deluded and disconnected. I spent many, many months when I'd be fronting again in pain, wishing for someone who was not there to just say hi again, and writing post on post where I vented and begged that I could just be a better person for them. I think that was an overblown guilt, and I didn't know what to do with myself, because I often apologize for people who hurt me if I don't think it was on purpose.

I know that whatever you have going on, I cannot get behind, and I don't want to be a part of anymore. I'm tired. And I hope that I can heal from this shit because it's awful having a whole person inhabiting yourself that you cannot even let speak because he is sick and miserable and doesn't feel like he can show himself. I have removed you from discord and I wanted to get this off my chest so I'm posting it here. There's like, two people following this blog who might be active and I'm not writing this to be spread some sort of anger, but to get it out of me.

[cloveroctobers]

1st HAPPY BIRTHDAY. Second, is there anyway you could write an OJ Haywood fic where y/n is with him when he goes to find the one horse at the old town attraction thing and instead of OJ getting knocked out by Jean Jacket, y/n does? They’re dating btw. Thanks!

YONDER | OJ HAYWOOD

A|N: Thanks for the bday wish 🫶🏽!! I know this was requested forever ago but…life you know!? Anyways it’s here and I always try to make my work shorter thinking that way I’ll be able to put content out quicker but that rarely goes my way! I’m trying y’all! Fun fact: wanted to take a break from writing this month but…idk if thats likely… (let’s see when i disappear next lmao) we’ll see! Hope the wait was worth it and that you enjoy!

WARNINGS: language? Religion + v*mit? Possible wrong usage of the word, “yonder,” idfk, I have southern grandparents and thats the first time I heard the word lol. I think that’s it!

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this was kinda stupid.

Normally you did not find joy hating on something someone was passionate about but internally? You were surely screaming, ‘fuck those horses!’ The moment dear OJ decided he wanted to get Lucky back from Jupiter’s claim.

Even Em stared at you as if you had also lost your mind, jumping up to follow after your boyfriend and her very persistent brother.

“I know y’all not finna leave me here with Hispanic Green Day and with that thing lurking around out there?” Em voiced.

OJ ignored his baby sister, carrying on to his truck while you reluctantly followed.

Angel muttered, “I don’t know if I’m meant to be offended by that but…Green Day has hits.”

“Yeah, yeah whatever. I still see you’re going through your angst phase and you’re what? Twenty-one or something?” Em fanned her hand, turning back to you two before Angel could defend himself and spew that he was still going through a fresh heartbreak, “are y’all serious?”

Squeezing the patterned crochet hat further over your hair and let out a deep sigh, “nope,” you popped the, ‘p,’ before glancing over at OJ who started up the truck, “but wherever this guy goes…”

Em scoffed as OJ began to reverse and turn around to exit the ranch, “you’re right beside ‘em. Fine. Just hurry up and get your asses back here, I don’t have the best feeling about splitting up!”

“Slight work.” OJ called out to his sister through the window, two fingers in the air while she nervously chewed down on her bottom lip, watching as you two began to take the long trail out of the ranch.

This was just like her childhood all over again.

Em could feel Angel’s eyes burning on the side of her face which resulted in her giving the bleached twenty-something year old the side eye, “don’t start, angel.”

Angel moved his fists from his hips to raise them in surrender, “I didn’t say anything!”

“Yeah but I know you were thinking it!” Em pointed.

Sooner than you hoped, you and OJ made it to the parking lot of the theme park quite quickly. There were cars scattered around but not as busy as it could be. As you stood on the outside of the passenger side, you scrunched up your nose, honey brown circular glasses lifting as you did so, staring up at the blazing sun. That seemed a bit more comforting than the clouds lately…however the heat seemed to be glaring at you, almost warning you to go back the way you came.

“You ready?” OJ tapped your waist, gaining your attention.

Taking a small inhale you stepped forward, following after OJ, almost jogging to keep up with him, soon falling into step beside him. OJ was always hard working and when he had his mind set on something, he would always find a way to pull through.

The front gate creaked behind you as your eyes searched the scarce park. A whole tumbleweed brushed by your feet while you took in the emptiness of the park. If you thought your stomach hurt before? It definitely began to increase along with the heavy beating of your heart.

Your eyes instantly shot to OJ’s, his own round hooded eyes always expressed what his mouth didn’t. He was almost thinking the same damn thing; instead of heading through the wooden gates, he tapped your forearm with a nod of his head.

“In and out. Quick…depending on lucky. We’ll be alright.” He encouraged.

If it was anyone else, you probably wouldn’t have believed that. Yet OJ could always reassure you with those eyes and a brief touch. Honestly he didn’t want you to come with him but he didn’t have the time to start an argument. Plus with you by his side? His best company, his companion, good luck charm, and half of his heart? He had the confidence to do what he needed to do versus doing what he wanted or was chosen to do.

Slowly you trailed after OJ who, on the other hand was taking quick strides while you glanced around at each building. It felt incredibly eerie being here at a once lively western themed place turned ghost town—with not a person in sight.

This was not normal.

Before you know it, you’re hugging yourself as you loop through the entrance to the arena…feeling the walls almost suffocating you as you kick up dirt with each step.

OJ’s kissing his lips at Lucky, attempting to get the black beauty’s attention, who stood inside of what appeared to be a glass box. Glancing at the empty red bleachers, it didn’t take you long to guess what Jupe had been up to. First his invitation, to Lucky held hostage in a box, and now there’s no one around for his big showcase?

It’s not adding up.

Turning your head back to lucky who would not move, it was your turn to click your tongue against your bottom tooth. Another sound that seemed to work with the horses, followed by OJ continuing to make his own. With the new added sound from you, you could see Lucky slightly tilt his head in your direction.

“That’s it!” OJ yelled, thinking the both of you were getting somewhere.

“If only I brought my bag of parsnips, we’d be leaving by now.” You muttered, now squatting down, ready to clap to get lucky to at least move more than an inch.

Before you could slap your hands together, OJ quickly gripped your shoulder—immediately making you stare up at him in question. One finger followed, up to his lips as he peered up at the sky allowing you to see it—Jean jacket sliding behind its cloud.

Shuffling back, still crouching, you widened your eyes while OJ began to lower his voice, constantly glancing back and forth between the sky and his beloved horse. “Lucky!” He whisper-yelled.

Your eyes were focused on the sky now. The sun did not shine as bright on this side of Jupiter’s claim. In fact it was much cloudier, colder, it was much more unsettling and as the wind began to pick up…so did Jean jacket. You held your breath expecting it to dive right in for the black horse; instead it spluttered right towards the both of you.

The saucer-like creature knew that it had other guests to devour and you struggled to get upright as OJ failed to loop a arm around your ribcage and yank you out of the way. It all felt like slow motion with OJ missing you and fighting to keep his eyes on the territorial creature.

You were never good with distance. It never served you well and you were often teased by your own family; that was why you were the only one who needed some glasses, being far-sighted and all. Although your eyes were focused mainly on the sky after OJ brought it to your attention, you assumed Jean jacket was out yonder, much further than it appeared than this very moment.

As OJ scrambled back, still reaching out for you, screaming your name to what fell on deaf ears, he fought with the dirt as Jean jacket almost spit it in his eyes. And as the wind continued picking up, jean jacket got even closer, allowing the both of you to see just the opening of its mouth. OJ grappled, watching as a chill ran over his frame, while the pressure from Jean jacket flipped you onto your torso.

Your screams on the other hand, were not unheard.

OJ tussled (from being knocked back onto his bottom as well) to get to your outstretched hands. Which seemed to upset Jean jacket even further as you suddenly gripped your nails deep into the dirt, however you seemed to be getting dragged inch by inch. Next, the creature did not have much patience, deciding to lift the walls of the arena.

Would it collapse?

It barely held in the first place as wood began to fall in between the space of you and OJ. You could feel your nails cracking and beginning to bleed but that did not stop you from holding on.

There wasn’t much you knew about this UFO but the spluttering from it signaled that it was agitated with you two. Wrestling to lift your head up at OJ, it was your turn to watch in horror as another slab of wood went flying in his direction, slapping his face with a impact that shifted his entire body to one side. You couldn’t scream for him because the next thing you know, your body was lifting itself and you were flung to the side of the walls with a scream of your own.

It felt like two sacks of sands were sitting over your eyes and you fought like hell to get them open. Maybe if you kept them closed longer, you wouldn’t feel the immense pain that was beginning to settle in. You groaned, trying to move your limbs but you felt something holding your face in place.

That’s when your body jolted upwards with a shock, not knowing where you were and what was happening.

“Hey, hey, hey. Baby, it’s me.” OJ’s voice was heard and you instantly relaxed but visibly winced.

Your vision wasn’t straight and it was hard to focus on OJ’s features but one thing is for sure? You could smell blood, whether it be from his body or your own—that stench was evident.

“Looks like we’ve been out for awhile,” His knuckle brushed against your cheek as you tried to focus on your breathing, “How you feeling?”

Huffing out air from your nostrils, a snarky response was written on your stained face but you blinked multiple times to see a figure at the opening of the arena. “Like I should fight that—that—animal over there or hug it.”

Another round of red flags silently went off in OJ’s head as you stuttered trying to figure out Lucky’s name. Without question, his fingertips moved around your coils feeling for what he suspected and earning a loud hiss from you.

Slapping his wrist, “stop touching me! Let me go back to sleep, please.”

“There’s a first,” OJ lightly joked while you lolled your head around a bit, “you definitely been concussed. And we can’t stay here any longer.”

“Hm?” It was your turn for the short replies now.

Gently but firm, OJ got you to your feet and tried to lean you against what was left of the arena’s walls while he went towards lucky who patiently waited. He whistled him over, thrilled that he actually came to him as he whispered sweet nothings to the animal, patting his backside and encouraging him to lead the way out of Jupiter’s claim.

He noticed you sliding against the wall and rushed over to you, catching you before you slid back against the ground. “Stay with me, baby.”

“Always.” You gargled, finding your footing.

OJ tried to steady you but found this situation to be difficult. It was dark out and no one wanted to be out in the dark with Jean jacket lingering in the clouds. That was almost more frightening than the day time. So OJ sniffed, pinching his nostrils before he easily lifted you into his arms and began to speed walk beside lucky who trotted along.

“Phone.” OJ tried to not scratch at his already crusted over wound on his forehead as he sat beside you in the driver’s seat.

When he didn’t get any service with his simple flip phone, he searched the passenger seat for yours, finding it underneath the seat. And of course a flashing red battery was what he was met with. OJ sucked his teeth, tossing the glove compartment open for the extra car charger that (you purposely left) fit the more “up to date phones” and plugged yours in.

Looks like he wouldn’t be calling anyone for this thirty minute drive. OJ glanced at you, making sure that you were buckled in before he took the car out of park.

“Hey, babe. Where’s my—what do they call them? Spectacles. The extra things I need to see.” You pointed at your eyes, your head rolling around on the head rest.

OJ kept peering over at you as he drove pass a gas station followed by some hills, “shit, your glasses? Yeah. They were completely broken back there, sorry about that. I think you left your old pair back at the house, up in my room. You’ll be alright.”

“Yeah…I’ll just be blind as fuck for the rest of the night.” You slurred, “I really want to sleep.”

“No! No, keep those pretty eyes open for me.”

“You’re pretty.” You mocked, making the man smirk at you in the night.

“I’ll even put on some music, keep you awake.”

“Some gospel?”

OJ was shocked at that.

“You really want to hear gospel?”

“I know you’d rather listen to…dill pickles?”

“…what, y/n?” OJ sighed, he knew that was a cartoon but he just knew you were trying to tease him about some genre he didn’t listen to.

“That country singer. Kane something.” You sighed, “I can’t think straight…my head hurts.”

“I know, we’ll get you some ice soon. I promise, we just need to get in doors before—

OJ trailed off as he actually turned the radio on for you. He twirled the nozzle in search of the gospel station. You came from a religious background and that’s how OJ met you, through his mother, when the Haywood’s would attend your father’s church every other Sunday.

That of course faltered when his mother passed when he was around twelve or so. His father tried to keep up with attending, knowing that’s what his wife would have wanted but soon found the horses took up much more of his time along with raising two kids all on his own. Thankfully OJ still got to see you at school…and you’ve been together since you were seventeen.

Now just hold on (hold on)

Change is coming (change is coming)

Hold on (hold on)

Don't worry (don't worry 'bout a thing)

Hold on (hold on)

You can make it (you can make it)

Hold on (hold on)

Everything (everything will be alright)

Is gonna be alright

“I love this song.” You sniffed, your voice soft.

OJ knew that, which is why a feeling told him to stop here after messing with staticky stations. It was one of your comfort songs and that’s all he wanted to bring you after the both of you were basically fighting for your lives miles ago.

And when you reached your battered hand out for his, OJ didn’t hesitate to interlock your fingers together. Then slowly you felt the prickle of his facial hair on the back of your hand as he placed a kiss there. A small smile graced your dry lips while OJ held onto your hand, with the other gripping the wheel, his body sitting up, which meant he was about to float this piece.

You were his happy place and he was your safety.

And he didn’t let go of your hand for the rest of the night. Not even when you arrived at the ranch, the jolting of the land making you puff your cheeks.

“I need to throw up.”

Thankfully the both of you weren’t far from the house, OJ spotting Angel’s van not too far from his own now parked truck.

“Okay. You need me to help you out?” OJ asked, although the thought of watching you puke made his own stomach turn.

Freeing your hand, you held it up to him, your other shaky hand reaching around to unbuckle yourself. OJ dipped his head as he began to unbuckle himself and open the door. That feeling came around again, almost like a whisper, telling OJ to look up.

And when OJ caught Jean jacket, hovering above with a triangle rainbow garland hanging from it…Immediately he got back into the car with a slam of the door. He quickly turned to you, already waiting for his eye and you gently shook your head with a hand over your mouth.

“Uh uh.” You managed to get out, lips tightly pressed together and a face so pale in the moonlight.

OJ held out his hand, palm up for you to place your hand back in his, “Nope.”

It was decided, no matter the yonder between you two and Jean jacket, the both of you agreed to stay put in the car for the night…

And the horse statue that collided with your side of the windshield…only made your plans for the night, much more clear.

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Continue along with my summer anthology prompts here.

[s-hera]

He's So Pretty! (1)

Child Sanzu Haruchiyo X Child Reader! (7/8 yrs old?)

~ tags. contains spoiler from ch. 241(?), Mention of blood, Fluff, Angst if you squint, Childhood to lovers!

~ wc. 0.6k

~ A/n. From my Alt Account, I already said that i'm going back on this account and write again for my 115 followers.

One | Two

“Ha-haru? Are you fine?” you asked the boy that's crying in front of you.

“No, Onii-chan gets mad at me again…it’s always my fault, i should stop talking to senju”

“Ehhh? Why? You’re the best big brother!”

“I always get scolded because my brother thinks i’m teaching her boyish things”

“Mhhhh…well you don’t teach her boyish things, right?”

“Of Course not! She’s the only girl, she need to act like a lady”

‘But being boyish sometimes is definitely fine and she hang out with you and your friends…and, and your brother is friends with your friends older brother too”

“Yeah, he always hangs out with shinichiro-kun”

“Senju’s older siblings are both boys too, you should expect her to act boyish, your brother should!”

“He won’t listen to me anyways, i not gonna hangout with senju anymore”

“Then senju would feel lonely, don’t you think?”

“...”

You and haru were childhood friends, both of you attends the same pre-school. His house is just a few steps away from you too, that’s why you two often meet, you haven’t met his friend but you already met his siblings, he always talks about how his past few days went like you two were really the closest friends!

One day you saw haruchiyo…with a bandage on his face, the bandage doesn’t look new at all, the blood almost covers it all, crying right on your face while your mom gives him a warm entrance.

“Haru-chan, what happened?” your mom asked him, but she was treated with a silence.

“Are you fine?Do you want something to eat? Or, or replace the bandage?” you asked panickedly since he was treats your mother with a silent treatment and the haruchiyo you know, the akaashi haruchiyo you know is talkative and loud.

“ ‘m fine mrs. l/n…this, this is nothing”

“No, haru you’re lying!”

“y/n, don’t shout at him, do you want some fruits or something? y/n’s father is going home sooner maybe you want some ice cream or something sweet?”

“Ice cream would be fine, mrs. l/n”

“You’re so polite haru-chan! And stop calling me mrs too, call me aunt or auntie…you were very closed with my dearest y/n, treat me as you mom too, ok?and let’s re-do your bandage, if that is fine with you of course!”

“Please, aunt” he said to your mom while looking like an abandoned puppy…

“Stay here for dinner too, i would be cooking something delicious!”

And the time flies as if nothing happened, but he was there on that house couch, on your house couch looking beautiful, like he always been. With his new bandaged face…but his wounds, when your mom looked at it she was shocked too.

“Do you mind telling us what happened?”

“This is no-nothing, aunt! No worries”

“Are you sure it’s nothing?im worried for you”

Lies, you know it was a lie…you didn’t want to push him or anything, thats why you didn’t bother asking.

And after that, after all of that…time really flies, just like three weeks ago haru was in your couch and now you would be leaving him.

“Im sorry, really sorry…my father got promoted, we need to leave and go somewhere faraway. But- but! Don’t be sad, tey won’t sell our house in here! I promise, im gonna comeback here! And buy ice cream with you everyday”

“I understand, no need to explain that much…” but deep inside him, he was afraid, afraid of being lonely, afraid that he doens’t have a people to call home anymore, he’s afraid you won’t comeback or even remember him, he’s afraid of you and your family leaving.he can’t do anything about it, better just to shut up and be silent.

“Forgot to tell you that, haru your face and scar is pretty! Just like your blue diamond eyes!” things you said before going in the car and leave japan.

© 2022 by s-hera━ all rights reserved! comments, likes, and reblog are highly appreciated. plagiarism is strictly prohibited.