#and i ran out of the classroom and told 3 teachers until the situation was handled 😭😭

[rissslays]

i hate old people who think they should be respected because of their age. Like if you dont respect me im bot going to respect you??? there is no "free" pass because you have lived longer than me???

[m-jelly]

Mr Smith

Pairing: Erwin x Fem!Reader

Genre and tags: Modern AU, fluff, romance, preschool teacher Erwin, little Armin, flirting, becoming a couple, small town AU

Concept: You're good friends with Armin's single dad and help him out with his son. When he gets busy with work, you take over looking after Armin because you work from home. You take Armin to preschool and meet the teacher he loves, Mr Smith. Erwin takes an instant like to you and over time asks you out on a date.

Tagging fellow Erwin simp @ladycheesington <3

Armin played with your necklace as you held him and carried him towards preschool. He talked to you about Greek Gods he knew about and how his teacher was like Apollo. He got excited when you told him about Gods you knew and liked.

You pushed the door open for the school and made your way to his room. "You ready for today?"

Armin nodded. "Yes. I have a fun lunch."

You hummed a laugh. "I'm glad you're looking forward to what I made for you." You opened his classroom door and blushed when you saw his handsome teacher. "Oh, wow. Hello Apollo."

Armin giggled. "Mr Smith!"

Erwin turned to look at Armin. His cheeks burned when he took you all in. He felt a shiver run through him and his heart throb. He prayed to whoever was listening that you were single. He moved closer and shook Armin's little hand. "Good to see you again, little man. You ready for today?"

Armin nodded. "Yes sir!"

Erwin chuckled and looked at you. "And who is this with you?"

"Daddy's friend!"

You gave your name. "I'm friends with Armin's dad. He's working earlier for a few weeks, so I offered to help out."

Erwin nodded. "Right, well I'll need you to fill out a guardian form."

"Sure thing." You put Armin on his feet and crouched. "I'm going to go with Mr Smith, okay? Do you need help with your bag and shoes?"

Armin shook his head. "I'm okay!" He leaned up and kissed your cheek. "Bye-bye!"

You hummed a laugh and waved to him as he ran to his cubby to take his things off. "Cutie." You stood up and looked up at the tall broad-shouldered muscular man. "So, Mr Smith."

"Erwin, please." He referred to his desk. "This way and I'll get that form."

"Thanks." You walked with him and smiled. "So, you like kids? Bet you're a great dad."

Erwin blushed. "Ah, I'm not a dad."

You tilted your head. "Wife not want them?"

He placed a form on his desk. "No wife or girlfriend. I haven't found the right one yet."

You took a pen and filled out the form. "Well, you are a catch. Any woman would be lucky to be with you."

He looked down at the form. "Is there a fella too who might collect instead sometimes?"

You looked up at Erwin. "I'm single if that's what you're asking. I'm in the same situation as you." You smiled a little. "Haven't found the right one."

Erwin took the form and felt a bubble of excitement. "Thank you for the form and uh...I look forward to seeing you again."

"Me too." You waved to Armin as he stopped playing for a bit. You giggled before smiling at Erwin. "I better get going. Bye."

Erwin gave you a smitten smile and waved. "Bye." He let out a long sigh as soon as you left. He frowned when he felt a tug on his trouser leg. He looked down at Connie. "Yes, Connie?"

Connie gave him a big grin. "You like that pretty lady!"

Sasha jumped around. "Pretty lady! Pretty lady! Mr Smith likes pretty lady!"

Erwin blushed. "Come on you two, let's start our day."

Erwin was nervous but excited. He'd been getting closer to you over the past week. You'd stay for a bit in the morning and at the end of school. He'd talk with you for ages until you had to go home. He'd been talking to Armin about you. He had learned so much about you.

He perked up when Armin came running in. "Armin! Hello!"

Armin grinned. "I told her no coffee."

"Thank you."

You walked in and groaned. "Morning Erwin. Sorry if I'm grumpy, but this little one said I'm banned from coffee."

Erwin chuckled. "Sorry, that was me who asked him."

Your brow raised. "Oh? Why's that?"

Erwin cleared his throat. "Well, today we're having a tea party." He walked closer to you. "And I was hoping you would be my date."

You folded your arms. "This a joke thing, oooor?"

Erwin's cheeks burned. "R-Real." He gulped hard. "I w-want to take you on a date if that's okay? I know it is where I work..." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Now that I think about it, it's silly and I'm pressuring."

"I'd love to."

Erwin perked up. "Really?"

You hummed a laugh and nodded. "Really." You nibbled your lip. "So, where is our table?"

Erwin smiled in delight. "This way."

You walked with Erwin to a little table with safe coffee on the table. You sat down and hummed a laugh as the little kids around you. You smiled as they tucked into the juice and snacks Erwin had put out for them. You grinned at Erwin when he sat close to you and handed you your coffee.

You sipped your drink and paused. "Mm, this is my favourite." You locked eyes with him. "How did you know?"

"Armin." He looked over at Armin and his friends watching you both before giggling at being caught. "Looks like we have supporters."

You smiled at the kids. "Well, they have great taste." You looked Erwin in the eyes. "We'd make a great couple."

Erwin's cheeks burned harder. "Yes, I think we would." He reached over and held your hand. "We'd be perfect for each other."

You hummed a laugh. "This is the perfect date by the way. I love it."

Erwin entwined his fingers with yours as he walked down the road in the cosy and close town that you both called home. He was a little shy walking through town now you were dating for a while, mainly because everyone knew him as the son of the mayor and the owner of the local preschool. Plus, all the little kids knew him.

Erwin tugged you against him and wrapped his arm around you. He leaned down and kissed the top of your head. "I love you."

You looked up at him. "I love you too."

He picked you up making you squeal. "You are so beautiful." He held you and kissed you. He smiled when he heard giggling. "We're being watched."

You looked over the road to see Connie and Sasha holding hands with both of their parents watching over them. "Hi, Connie and Sasha. Hi mums and dads."

Erwin put you on your feet and waved. "Hello." He cleared his throat. "Enjoy the festival my dad organised today."

You snorted a laugh. "I guess we can only get privacy in my home."

He hummed and held you close as he walked with you. "You're right."

You nibbled your lip. "Wanna come over mine?"

Erwin stiffened up. "Please."

You giggled as you pulled him along to your sweet home that Erwin was very familiar with. You pushed your door open which was never locked because your town was so safe. You turned to Erwin and pulled him inside. "Close the door and lock it."

"Lock it?"

You giggled. "That's right."

Erwin fumbled with the door before diving for you and wrapping you up in his arms. "You are divine."

You bent backwards and giggled. "You're so incredibly handsome."

Erwin crashed his lips against yours as a big hand ran up your back and the other grabbed your bum. He yanked you against him. He bit your lip before pushing his tongue into your mouth. He moaned in delight as you kissed him back with just as much love and passion as he had for you. He stumbled with you and decided to lift you up. He carried you to the sofa and sat down with you on his lap.

You pulled from his lips and admired his messy hair. Erwin had always had his hair tamed back at work, but when he was with you and on dates he put no products in it. You loved how soft it was under your fingers. You ran your fingers down and looked deeply into his ocean blue eyes.

Erwin massaged your buttcheeks. "What are you looking at?"

You smiled a little. "Your wonderful blue eyes." You lightly touched under his eyes. "I love gazing into them."

"Well, I like it when you do because it means I get to look back at you." He turned his head and kissed your hand. "I love looking at you. You're so beautiful. I just want to shower you with kisses."

You nibbled your lip as your hands ran down his chest. "I'm so glad I met you."

"Me too. You're my future." He shifted and put his hand in his pocket. "I was planning something, but there are eyes on us everywhere we go. So, this is our only private place." He showed you a little box. He opened it to reveal a ring as he said your name. "Marry me."

You nodded loads and offered your hand. "Yes! Yes Erwin!"

He chuckled and put your ring on before throwing the box and crashing his lips against yours. "I love you so much."

"I love you, Erwin."

[cerberuscaeli]

We're All Dead Inside || Part 2

A zombie apocalypse, modern AU.

A Childe x Female!Reader x Kaeya story.

Summary: A virus, made by a simple science teacher turns out into the biggest disaster Teyvat ever experienced, a real happening zombie apocalypse and no one is safe, not even the people that managed to survive.

Y/N and a few other students that managed to get into the safety of a classroom are now tasked with the biggest threat of their lives, and all they can do is try to stay alive, survive and get to the roof of the school building. But all is easier said than done.

Characters: Kaeya, Childe, Noelle, Keqin, Xiao, Zhongli, Diluc.

Pairings: Possible Kaeya x reader or Childe x reader (Two endings)

Chapter warnings (Each chapter will have its own warnings stated.): Zombies, blood, gore, angst. -> Let me know if I missed something!

Words: 1,016

A/N: Here's the next chapter! For now, not a Kaeya part in here, but I will try to add some of them so you can see how Kaeya endures all of this! But for now, have fun reading! <3

Enjoyed my work and want to help me to boost it? Reblog my work, leave a comment, or like! Reblogs are very appreciated!

We're All Dead Inside Masterlist

Want to read more of my work? Find my General Masterlist here!

Chapter 1 - Chapter 3 (Coming soon)

The three of you ran side by side, checking every classroom through the window in hopes to find an empty one where you could hide, but until now there seemed there was no empty classroom left. Most of them were filled with zombies, some rooms more than others but enough to know that the three of you wouldn't be able to take the time, or maybe you could?

"Next classroom with five or fewer zombies, go inside, I think I have a plan." You told the two boys. "Think I have a plan?" Xiao scolded. "He's right, with 'thinking we have a plan' isn't a good strategy in this whole situation." Childe retorted, eyes flashing to the classroom we passed by. "It's better than nothing, or do you want to keep running?" You scoffed, motioning to the three of you running through the hallway, zombies dashing after the three of you while trying to avoid one that would launch at you.

Child furrowed his brows as Xiao just gave you an annoyed glare, they both seemed not convinced of your idea. "Let's head down." Childe decided, nodding at the staircase that you were headed at. "We have to go up, not down." You fought back with your words. "We have no choice, okay? Now just shut up and let's find a way out!" Xiao hissed, silencing the both of you. The raven-haired boy was not in the mood to have you and Childe bicker about some stupid plans while literally running for life.

You stayed silent, deciding it would be no use to fight back against Xiao. Aside from the growling, snarling, and screeching from the zombies, no other sound could be heard. The tension was hard and could be easily cut with a knife. Frustration was slowly building, mainly because you all started to slowly grow tired from the constant running and were getting desperate to stop and get some air, but that was at this moment, not an option unless you got into an empty, safe classroom.

The three of you reached the staircase, Childe, and Xiao starting to go down first, taking a turn to the next stairs but stopping. "Shit, they're coming up." Childe cursed, turning around with Xiao following close.

You glanced behind you and then back at the staircase, for now, there was no way up and you could only fight your way down, but that would be a huge task with no weapons. Your brain was turning, trying to come up with a quick plan, and that's when your eyes landed on a stick that lay on the windowsill at the window that looked out over the football field. Without further thinking, you dashed towards it and picked it up before running past the two boys and diving right into the fight.

You used the wooden stick to either stab them or to hold them horizontal to use it as a barricade and to push them back. If you could force them down enough, you would be able to let Xiao and Childe through with a decreasing chance to get eaten. But the boys seemed to think differently about it as Childe pushed himself beside you and started to kick zombies back, and managed to even throw one over the stairs, letting the zombie fall a few floors down onto the ground.

You're e/c scanned the place in front of you, five more steps down, get some space to turn around the corner, and be quick enough to fight off zombies that might come at you when entering that hallway You pulled your stick back for a moment, waiting for the zombie to lunge at you before you dived the stick in his body, having enough left to only feel it's stinking breath on your face You used all your strength to push him with your foot, kicking him backward and the three of you watched it tumble backward, hands flailing around as it crashed in other zombies, watching how they all started to tumble down from the stairs like domino blocks.

And now there was space enough to run around the corner, Childe went first, followed close by Xiao as you ran last, stopping now and then to fend off a zombie that was close to catching up. "Here!" Childe shouted, pointing at a classroom somewhere halfway as he started to pound on the door, yelling some orders as Xiao joined his side. Did more people survive?

But their knocking and yelling only caused attention from a group of zombies in the classroom next to the one they tried to get into, because whoever was in there certainly didn't seem to budge to open the door.

You almost reached Childe and Xiao, the classroom door finally swinging open to pull them inside, as at the same moment zombies started to seep out the classroom next to them, running at Childe and Xiao, one tried to grab Xiao but he got in on time, and you realized you wouldn't make it to that door, let alone get inside. And so you made a b-line for the classroom before the one the others had entered, facing four other zombies. You started to run towards the window, throwing chairs and desks towards the zombies, to build yourself a little bit more time, even when it was just some seconds, but even one extra second could do a lot.

You reached the window and threw it open, climbing on the windowsill before you turned your head at the zombies. "Hey, deadholes! Come and get me!" You yelled at them as they started to run your way. You watched them get closer and closer, their hands reaching for you as you silently counted, trying to calculate the right time, and the moment the first one leaned forwards to grab you, you pushed your feet off the windowsill and swung aside, holding for dear life the outdoor windowsill of the window above you from the next floor.

And all you could think about at that moment was holding on and not letting go.

[rachaelswrites]

The Past is in the Past

Chapter 3

Spencer Reid x Daughter!reader

Warnings: blood, mentions of murder, talk of drugging (let me know if I miss any)

After what felt like days, an officer finally walked into the room and shut the door behind you. You picked your head up from your arms and looked at him, “Are you letting me go?” you asked. 

“Not yet,” he said, “We need to ask you some questions and get your statement first,” he explained. He sat down in the chair across from you before pulling out a pencil and notepad, “Are you okay with answering my questions?”

“Am I a suspect?” you asked. 

“No. As I explained earlier, you’re just a person of interest in the investigation. As soon as we know you’re clear, you can be released to your dad,” he said. 

“My dad? He’s here?” you asked. You had hoped he’d come but you were wondering why he didn’t come in and see you yet. He would know better than anyone how freaked out you’d be. The last time you were in a situation like this, you didn’t handle it well although no one knew that because you had been drugged against your will. Maybe that was a good thing but it wouldn’t help you now. 

“He and his team are here,” he replied, “He’s sitting out there,” he pointed out the window to your dad, who looked to you and you saw the hurt in his eyes, “The team is looking at the scene and is trying to clear you.”

“Okay,” you said. 

“Okay so,” the officer started, “Your English teacher said you left class to go to the bathroom at eleven twenty seven. Is that true?”

You nodded, “Yeah.”

“What happened after you left the classroom?”

“I was walking down the hallway and when I got near the end, I heard a scream so I stopped,” you said, “I didn’t know if it was just someone messing around or something serious.”

“Why wouldn’t it be serious?” he asked. 

You shrugged, “Sometimes kids mess around in the halls together and make a lot of noise. I can hear it sometimes during class. It’s distracting.”

The officer nodded, “So how could you tell it wasn’t someone messing around?”

You shrugged again, “It sounded different than a normal scream. I could hear the fright in her voice.”

“Who’s voice?”

“Georgia’s,” you said, “And after I stopped, I heard it again so I followed it. She sounded in pain and I wanted to help.”

“Why did you want to help?” he asked. 

“Why wouldn’t I? I heard someone who might need my help so I ran. My dad saves people and he always told me I could also. So that’s what I did.”

“Okay so when you followed the voice, where did you go?”

“I went down the hallway and I heard movement from the custodian closet so I went in and I saw her.”

“How was she when you found her?” he asked. 

“She was uh,” you hesitated, picturing how you found her less than an hour ago, “She was bleeding. Really badly so I tried to stop it,” you said, “And I tried to keep her talking and awake cause that’s what you’re supposed to do but,” you stopped to take a breath and to try and hold the tears that threatened to spill out. 

“But what?” he asked, looking up from his paper. 

“But I couldn’t save her,” you said softly, letting several tears fall down your face. You couldn’t wipe the tears away due to the blood still on your hands. You didn’t want it near your eyes or touching your face so you let them fall and hit the table, “The janitor tried to stop me and when he did, she must’ve bled out enough because when I got back to her, I couldn’t hear her heart.”

“What did you do after that?”

“I did CPR until everyone showed up but it didn’t work,” you said, more tears spilling out, “I guess I didn’t do enough.”

The officer finished up his notes before looking at you, “Thank you Y/n. I’ll let your dad in now if you’d like.”

“Please,” you mumbled. 

He got up from his chair and went to the door, opening it for your dad to step in, “This stays open and I’ll have an officer standing outside,” he said before letting your dad push past him and go to you. 

Spencer immediately pulled you up from your chair and hugged you tight. He wrapped his arms around you, holding you to his chest and resting his chin on the top of your head. You didn’t hug him back though. Instead, you left your arms at your side. 

When Spencer realized you didn’t return his hug like you normally did, he pulled away and looked at you. Your face was blank and there were tears running down your face. He quickly let you sit back in your chair before he knelt down in front of you, resting his hands on your knees, “Y/n,” he said softly. 

“What?” you asked. 

“Are you okay?” he asked. 

You shook your head and burst into tears, making Spencer bring his hands to your face and he wiped the tears away for you, since you couldn’t, “Hey hey I need you to breathe for me baby. Come on, take one deep breath for me,” he instructed. 

You tried your best to follow his directions, “I can’t I-I-”

“It’s okay,” he said, leaning forward to place a kiss on your forehead, “I’m right here okay? I’m not going anywhere.”

You calmed down a bit, finally getting a chance to talk, “I didn’t do it dad. I only tried to help her but I couldn’t.”

“Y/n you did everything that you could,” he said, “You made her last moments here kind, not the horrible violence that happened to her. I know she’s thankful for what you did.”

You reached for his hand but you moved it back, setting it in your lap. Whenever you were stressed, or anxious, or bored, your dad had always let you mess with his hand. It calmed you down and redirected your attention and that’s what you really needed now. 

Spencer sensed that’s what you wanted to do but with both your afflictions with messes and things like that, he knew you were hesitating to grab his hand with the dried blood covering yours. 

“I’ll be right back okay? I’ll go see what I can do about this,” he said, motioning to your hands. He got up from his spot and walked to the officer near the door, “Can I take her somewhere to wash off? She's still covered in dried blood.”

The officer nodded, “Yeah the forensics team has everything they need from her already,” she said, “You guys can use that bathroom over there,” she pointed to the bathroom across the way, “Door stays open though.”

Spencer nodded and shot her a thankful smile before turning around, “Come here,” he said softly. You stood from your spot and walked to him as he slung his arm around your shoulder and led you to the small family bathroom the officer was letting you use. He let you sit on the edge of the toilet seat as he turned on the sink. He let the water get a bit warmer before he motioned for you to stand and he brought your hands over the sink.

He grabbed paper towels and wet them before gently scrubbing away at your hands.

“I’m sorry,” you said, watching as the water turned pink and ran down the drain. 

“Why are you sorry?” he asked, not looking up from your hands, “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Yeah but I caused all of this,” you said, “This is just like Mexico.”

“Hey,” Spencer said in his stern but soft parent voice, “This is not your fault and this is nothing like Mexico,” he set down the wet paper towel and grabbed more dry ones, “I’m not going to let you go to jail for this okay? I will not let anything that happened to me happen to you. Mexico was not your fault, it was mine. You know that,” he said as he started to dry off your hands, “It was because I did something stupid and I put you at risk. That is nothing like this.”

“No but it’s the opposite dad,” you said, “I did something and now everyone around me has to fix it and suffer. It’s the same but different.”

“But you didn’t do anything and I didn’t do anything,” he said. 

“Yeah but that didn’t stop them from arresting you. What if they do the same to me?” you asked, finally looking up at your dad’s face. 

Spencer could see how scared you were now. Before, he couldn’t tell for sure but now, he could. You looked just like you did in Mexico and all the times where you weren’t sure if you would have a dad anymore and he hated that. He hated how he put you through so much but you wouldn’t let him quit. Just earlier that month, he had mentioned how he might start teaching full time to give you a more healthy and stable home life but you had told him, “If you quit, I am personally running to the FBI and burning your resignation papers” so he stayed.

“That’s not going to happen to you, Y/n. I promise you,” he said. 

“Promise?” you asked. 

“Absolutely.”

You reached out to hug him but he saw the dried blood on the sleeve of your sweater so he stopped you, “Hang on,” he said. He was wearing a sweater he knew you liked (and always threatened to steal) so he slipped it over his head, leaving him in just his dress shirt and tie, and handed it to you, “You can change into it,” he turned around to give you privacy as you slipped your sweater off and changed into the red one he had given you. 

“I’m good now,” you said, looking up at your dad as he turned back around. 

“Okay,” he said. He held out his hand for you to take, “We’ll have to wait for the team but I’m pretty sure we’ll be able to leave soon.”

You nodded and grabbed his hand, holding it tight. Spencer squeezed it once before leading you back into the conference room. You both took your seats again when you heard the doors to the office open again. You looked out through the window and spotted JJ, making her way over. 

“Hey Spence, Y/n, you’re good to go,” she said, standing in the doorway, “You’re cleared.”

“Oh thank God,” you heard your dad mumble as he stood up. 

“So does that mean I can go home?” you asked.

“Uh not yet,” JJ said softly, “You’re our only witness so far.”

“I already told you I didn’t see anyone else around. I don’t know how much help I can be JJ,” you said. 

“We wanna try a cognitive with you. Back at the BAU,” she said. 

“Oh.”

“It’ll be fine Y/n,” Spencer said, “It won’t take too long and afterwards we can go straight home.”

You nodded and followed JJ out of the conference room while Spencer made sure he had his bag and all your things before joining you. As you walked out of the office, he placed his hands on your shoulder. 

“How’d you guys clear her?” you heard your dad ask. His voice was muffled and you weren’t sure why. You were there. You were right there in front of him and you could feel his hold on you but his voice was distant. You were too focused on trying to push away all the memories from your head. They were foggy, but as the seconds passed, they became even more clear. 

“Garcia found footage that backs up her story. The video showed her reaction to the scream and then her running. She couldn’t have been on camera and with Georgia at the same time,” JJ said. She looked over to you to see your reaction. She was expecting you to be happy, hearing that your name is cleared of murder but she saw you staring ahead blankly. 

You barely registered her words. You couldn’t even focus on what was happening around you. You were just too caught up in your head.

You paced back and forth in front of Rossi and Luke. They decided to let you try and calm yourself down. The drugs in your system were starting to wear off and your anxiety was rising. 

“Y/n how are you feeling?” Rossi asked from the other side of the cell. 

You shook your head, “I-I don’t know what’s happening. My head really hurts and my heart, it’s beating really fast,” you said, looking up to Rossi and Luke. You quickly looked around for your dad. You could have sworn he was here, “Where’s dad? He was here wasn’t he? Did he leave me?”

“No Y/n he didn’t leave you,” Luke said, “He’s with Emily. She’s giving him a cognitive,” he explained. 

“A cognitive? Why?” you asked. 

“Do you remember anything that happened Y/n?” Rossi asked. Him and Luke both had worried looks on their faces. 

You shook your head again, “No. Please tell me what happened. You’re scaring me.”

Luke sensed your breathing pick up, “Hey just calm down,” he said softly, “Do you know where you are right now?”

You looked around and shook your head. 

“You’re in Mexico. You and your dad were arrested near the border,” he figured explaining it to you in steps would be best. You were still sobering up after all. 

“Arrested?”

Luke nodded, “There were drugs found. In the car and in both of your systems.”

“Oh,” you said quietly.

“But you’re both gonna be okay,” Luke quickly added. 

“Are they doing a cognitive to see who drugged us then?” you asked.

Luke nodded, “And to see if he can remember anything about Nadie Ramos,” he took a breath before dropping the next piece of information, “They’re charging him with her murder.”

You were snapped out of your thoughts when you felt a hand squeeze your shoulder. You looked up and made eye contact with your dad. 

“You okay?” he asked as he opened up the car door for you.

You nodded and climbed into the backseat. You gave your dad a small smile before you reached over and closed the door. Spencer took that as his cue that you weren’t ready to talk. He knew this situation was probably bringing back memories from Mexico. 

Taglist

@thatsonezesty13 @galactaghost @the-girl-wh0-cries-w0lf

[ptergwen]

from one kid to another

w/c: 6.0k

warnings: mentions of drinking, lots of swearing, implied smut, and angst at times

summary: it was a mistake, a beautiful one that you didn’t make on your own

a/n: this genuinely is my favorite thing i’ve ever written :,) i say that a lot but this time i mean it, it’s really special i think and i so so so hope y’all do too <3 enjoy my loves

-

there’s only one thing in life that testing positive for is actually positive.

depending on the situation, obviously. yours isn’t ideal, or planned or a blessing or whatever people say. it’s a gigantic mistake that you didn’t realize you made until a minute ago.

you’d noticed something was wrong when your time of the month came and all you experienced was the symptoms. cramps, cravings, everything except your actual period. as everyone is pretty much taught to do, you ran to the closest drug store for a pregnancy test. what the hell else could it be? you messed around a few weeks ago, so there’s a possibility.

your heart felt like it was going to explode out of your chest the whole time you waited for the results. you’d thought of calling tom over for support, but there are a couple of reasons why you couldn’t do that. you realized you made the right decision when your timer for the test went off.

two red lines. you’re pregnant. you’re pregnant, and your best fucking friend is the father.

where do you go from here?

the test falls from your hand and hits the floor with a mocking clank. you slide down until your back is against the bathtub. well, you’re fucked. what an ironic word choice.

the fact that you aren’t ready in the slightest to be a parent when you’re still growing up yourself is one thing. it’s another that this could ruin the most important relationship you’ve ever had.

no, tom won’t be mad. he’s never once fought with or even raised his voice at you. in your times of need, he’s been the one to uplift you and kiss your puffy cheeks dry. no matter how he takes this, you know it won’t be out on you. he is half responsible.

but, with how you left things the last time you spoke, you’re not sure you’ll be able to get past it.

tom is alarmingly good at hiding how he truly feels. you always tease him that it’s because he’s a gemini. he’ll come back with shut up, i’m an actor and stick his nose in the air to give you the full image. in all seriousness, it does take a toll on how well he can communicate.

you’ve seen it in small ways, like when he brings you along for press days and uses unenthusiastic smiles to cover up his yawns. how he’ll be polite in a conversation with people he’d rather not speak to, then mumble about it once you’re home. he tries to put forward the “appealing” parts of himself even though he’s more than them.

tom’s biggest communication issue is that he’s been in love with you since year nine and hasn’t said a word about it. you’ve yet to figure that one out.

you two became friends while tom was starring in billy elliot. his schedule was so scattered between shows and school, so he struggled to balance both. he often had to stay late for extra help on the lessons. you’d also been there a few times. you worked better in the classroom, and he was grateful he didn’t have to be alone with the teacher.

most kids made fun of tom for his interest in theater, to his face and behind his back. not you. you thought it was just incredible that someone in your own classes worked at the west end. you’d told him on your way home one night.

he’d heard you before he saw you. “you’re tom, right?” you asked from behind him, the two of you making your way through the hall. the question sounded friendly, and it wasn’t every day kids were nice to him. tom stopped walking so you could catch up. “yes, and you are?” you gave him a small smile, books clutched to your chest. he instantly returned it.

“y/n. i heard you’re in billy elliot?” you laughed at your understatement, then corrected yourself. “that you are billy elliot, i mean. that’s so cool.” “oh, i am. thank you,” he chuckled back, a full grin taking over his face. you were both walking again, you by tom’s side. “i was hoping to come see you soon.” your voice got quieter as you told him, like you were nervous.

tom never had much luck with girls, not at this point in his life. this was an opportunity to change that. at the very least, to make a new friend. he offered something you said yes to without a beat of hesitation. “what if i got you the tickets?”

from then on, you began talking during class and not only when it ended. tom really knew how to keep the conversation going, telling story after story that left you laughing so much your teacher would shush you. you’d eventually moved to hangouts at either of your houses. harrison came into the mix at some point, the three of you forming your own group.

the difference between tom and harrison was that while harrison linked with other girls, tom was only interested in you. he’d gotten a crush on you pretty fast, if he was being honest. it might have been your shared sense of humor or the way you said his name.

thomas, when he was being cheeky. tommy, which took the place of a pet name. even regular tom. that might have been his favorite. he loved how it rolled off your tongue. he loved, and still loves, you.

you’d gone to all of tom’s performances you possibly could, the ones for school theater included. you also gave him the push to take his talents to hollywood. tom was afraid he wasn’t cut out for the big screen, that he needed more practice and experience first. you told him that if this was what he wanted to do, he had to start somewhere. why wait?

tom then landed his first movie role in the impossible at the age of fifteen. he’d received tons of praise and almost gotten nominated for an academy award, all because you convinced him to audition. you played a huge part in keeping him grounded when he was between films, and caught him up on whatever schoolwork he’d missed.

you practically zoomed to tom’s house when he was announced as the next spider-man. you’d been constantly refreshing every social media platform marvel was on since tom became a finalist for the part. that process was probably the most difficult experience he’s ever gone through. you’d know, having heard all about it from tom.

the two of you celebrated along with the rest of tom’s family that night. you kept giving him little proud of you squeezes on his shoulder or knee. tom is eternally indebted to you for being the most supportive of everything he does.

he of course sends the support right back. although he went down the movie star path, acting wasn’t for you. you’d gone off to university and studied hard as hell and aced all your shit. tom quizzed you on material whenever you needed. he wanted to help you somehow, and this was all you’d let him do.

he’d offered to pay off your loans and any other expenses necessary because he had the money to do that now. you refused every single time, not trying to become dependent on him. he admired your drive, yet hated it at the same time. everything you’d done for him, it was his turn to be the caretaker. it should’ve been.

whenever tom wrapped filming for the holidays and came back home, you were always preparing for final exams. he kept you company, content with simply being in your presence. you typed away on your keyboard and read over notes until your eyes burned. tom occasionally brought you snacks, tea, asked how you were and what he could do.

sometimes, he would have to cut your study time short. he’d say it wasn’t healthy or you were overdoing it and to come relax with him for a bit. other times, tom let you be. he didn’t want to get in the way of your already stressful assignments. those were the nights you’d fall asleep in front of your laptop. drool on your chin, hunched over at your desk.

tom made sure to tuck you in, press a light kiss to whatever part of your face wasn’t covered in spit, then let himself out. he knew where your spare key was, so he used that. you’d wake up to a “Fell asleep studying again. Rest today x” text the next morning.

when it came time for you to graduate, tom was on the first flight there. it was during another round of reshoots for chaos walking. he respectfully told doug that he’d have to work around his schedule or replace him, which couldn’t be done so late into filming. tom didn’t care that it made him seem like a prick. he was getting to you no matter what he had to do.

he’d earned plenty of stares and whispers from people as he took his seat in the crowd. he was a proper celebrity now, so he expected it. his solution was to ignore everything and chat with your family about how proud they were of you, tom the most. he saw you go from a kid attempting algebra equations to an adult at her uni graduation. you’ve really grown up together.

it was why he teared up hearing them call your name, seeing you beam as you walked across the stage. your mom grabbed his hand and nodded at him, like she could tell exactly what was going through his head.

you ran right up to tom after the ceremony was over, leaping into his arms. he let out a couple of chuckles as he spun you around. “i didn’t think you’d make it,” you’d admitted, happy yet sad tears in your eyes. tom put you down so he could pull you in for a real hug. “i’ll always be wherever you are, y/n,” he said into your ear, rocking you while you gripped at his suit collar.

flash forward to a year later, your career is finally taking off, tom’s is flourishing like it has been for years, and you’re pregnant with his child. you’re trying to recall the series of events that led you to this moment.

you were both drunk, blackout drunk because the only reason you remember sleeping together is that you woke up naked in the same bed. harrison’s bed.

he threw a housewarming party for himself, having recently moved out of tom’s and the other boys’ place. the three of them, sam, and you were all in attendance, along with a lot of others you hadn’t met.

neither you nor tom could figure out where he knew all those people from. he’d clinged to you two for the most part, more so you now with tom usually away. they could have been from work. harrison is breaking into the business himself, small roles here and there. tom actually met him in your school’s theater program, then he introduced him to you, ten years ago already.

sam entertained himself by making concoctions with the snacks harrison set out. harry got together a playlist for the party. harrison and tuwaine struck up a conversation with some of harrison’s actor friends. that left you and tom alone, out of stuff to do, and with one way to fix it.

“drink?” tom had asked you, a smirk playing on his lips. “love one,” you hummed back and set off for the kitchen. the two of you raided harrison’s liquor cabinet, grabbing his biggest bottle of wine. he’d dumbly pointed it out during the house tour he gave you before the other guests arrived.

you were about to search for glasses, but tom’s fingers threaded through yours. he gently tugged you away and nodded behind him. “let’s bring this upstairs. seems much more fun there,” he’d murmured over the music, a grin breaking across your face.

tom is big on clubbing and socializing, however, you aren’t. he comes up with ways to get you out of these events, just in case.

“we can break in harrison’s bed for him,” you said as a completely harmless joke, no intentions of that becoming your reality later on. spoiler alert: it did. “and how are we gonna do that?” tom quirked a suggestive eyebrow and breathed out a laugh as you dragged him towards the stairs. despite yourself, you’d giggled at his words.

not one drink in either of you yet, and you were stumbling and cracking up as you ran upstairs. you’d pulled tom by your still attached hands into what you remembered as harrison’s room. tom shut the door, locked it, saying under his breath that would be a “convenient investment” for him to make as well.

he took out a bottle opener that he must have put in his pocket at some point and got to work on your wine, you getting comfortable on the new mattress. the two of you passed it to the other after every sip, tom licking the taste of your lip gloss off his own lips every so often.

the equivalent of three drinks in, you were making out. both of you were just tipsy at this point, tom holding you by your hips as you lied down, your legs around his waist. god, he could’ve done this sober. he’d dreamed about kissing you, really kissing you since he was fourteen. you’d always felt like you two had something more. ah, there it was.

halfway through the bottle got you past the next two bases, and you were ready for the fourth and ultimate one by the time you shook the last few drops onto the tip of your tongue. tom groaned at the sight of that, drawing your half naked body in closer to his.

you two had forgotten to use protection in each of your drunken states. without a doubt, you both would’ve agreed to a condom had your minds not been everywhere but where they should have.

you’d woken up first the morning after, panic immediately coursing through your veins thicker than blood. a fully nude and sleeping tom had you in his embrace, arms secured around your middle, facing you. you gasped when you made the connection, loudly enough to wake tom up. his long eyelashes tickled your face, a confused pout on his lips. uh... um...

“did we fucking...” you trailed off, no words to describe whatever unfolded. “fuck?” tom finished for you. a very blunt explanation, but true nevertheless. “looks like it,” he rasped, pout changing into a smile. your face fell at the vague memories of how you spent your night.

you definitely wanted to do it. just, he’s your best friend, who’s seen you at your least sexy moments over the years. when you were sick, had breakdowns from stress, you name literally anything, tom was there. it took one bottle of cheap wine for him to forget that?

the real answer was no. tom is entirely in love with you, for a decade at that. you were beginning to discover you feel the same, only you had no idea he already loves you. you’d assumed this was meant to be merely a hookup. from the frown your face held, he’d thought you were regretting it. oh, were you both so wrong.

“um... we don’t have to talk about it,” tom told you halfheartedly, under the impression that’s what you preferred. you physically felt yourself get weaker in tom’s strong arms. he’s not interested. “yeah, that’s probably for the best. i...” you were lying. his heart shrunk, shriveled up inside his chest. she doesn’t love me like that.

“you have to go. aren’t you behind on some emails?” tom hoped you didn’t hear his voice strain from the tears pushing at his eyes. “right. almost forgot, thanks.” you’d plastered on a smile, slipping out of his grasp. a tear rolled down his cheek, so he wiped it away before you noticed. you’d already gotten out of the bed and begun picking your clothes up off the floor.

“i’ll drive you home, then.” he rolled on to his other side, you thought so he could give you privacy to change. it was that, and also because he was crying. he couldn’t hold it in. tom is naturally an emotional person. imagine finding out the love you’ve had almost half your life is unreciprocated. it’s soul crushing.

you two found harrison snoring and on top of tuwaine as you left the house. no silly remarks or shared glances for the first time in ten years. tom couldn’t muster anything up, and you felt numb.

the drive was painful. you’d said your goodbyes after tom pulled up to the curb, which held an odd weight to them. once you were out of the car, a sob wracked through him, banging on the steering wheel and not giving a shit about the loud horn going off. you collapsed face first onto your bed. hours passed by while you stared at nothing and contemplated everything.

since it happened, you haven’t spoken much. small talk over text every few days or so, both of you pretending things are normal for the other’s sake. about a month later, today, is when you found out you’re pregnant.

there’s no use wallowing in any of this. you need to figure out your next move, one that should probably involve tom. first, you want to talk to someone else. you want other opinions and a voice in your head that isn’t your own. harrison gets a text from you saying to come over now, the now in all caps. he does.

you let him in after the second knock, his eyebrows furrowing in concern. however torn you are, you must look it. shirt balled in your fists, lip quivering. he keeps his eyes on yours as he steps inside, pushing the door shut behind him. this is all becoming too real. “y/n, are you okay?”

you’re about to cry in three, two...

“haz, i fucked up,” you choke out, tears unable to stay at bay. he takes you into his arms for a hug. half your face is hidden in his shoulder, hands clutching at his back. he lets you cry it out, holding you until your heavy breathing steadies. “what’s happened?” harrison asks quietly, both of you leaving the hug.

“if- if i tell you, you can’t freak out. you can’t tell anyone else, either,” you instruct, searching his eyes for certainty that he won’t under any circumstances. “i won’t, y/n/n,” he assures you and puts an encouraging hand on your arm. your heart pounding abnormally fast, you spit it out. your first time saying it aloud. “i’m pregnant.”

harrison flinches and doesn’t even try to conceal it. he takes his hand off of you, worry swimming across his features. he blinks at you, unsure of what to say. you’d react the same way, maybe worse, so you don’t blame him. a discussion you, him, and tom had a couple years back replays in his mind.

the three of you were talking about your futures, seeing as you were close to living them. when tom asked you two where you stood on having your own families, you didn’t hesitate to answer. “nope, the factory is closed for a long ass time.” until you were in your thirties, you aimed to focus on yourself. harrison distinctly remembered because of how you phrased it.

“you’re... you... wow,” is all he replies with. you head over to the couch, more tears welling up in your eyes. do the pregnancy hormones act up this early? harrison follows you over and sits down next to you with an awkward clearing of his throat. “do you want to be pregnant?” he has to ask because he’s not sure if he should congratulate you or what.

“i don’t know,” you answer honestly, voice airy. your eyes are fixed on the wall in front of you. you haven’t given yourself time to think about it. there are so many reasons you don’t, and a single one you do. “do you, um, know who the dad is?” harrison glances over at you. “yeah.” your voice cracks. you’re both afraid for him to ask what he does next.

he shifts so he’s sitting up. “can i know?” a sniffle passing through you, you finally look at him. “it’s tom,” you say it before you lose the nerve to. harrison’s face doesn’t change this time. he isn’t surprised you and tom went there. he’d seen your friendship growing into more the older you all got. what he can’t believe is where it took you.

his best friend pregnant, and his other best friend responsible for it.

“when did you...” “at your party,” you explain, bringing your legs up so they’re criss cross on the couch. “i thought you were gone a little too long.” he says that to try cheering you up. you appreciate the effort, but it doesn’t work. you’re not in a joking mood. he’ll stick to the main issue. “so, have you told him?”

“clearly not,” you scoff, not at him but at what you two have gotten yourselves into. “y/n... i think you should tell him,” harrison sighs out, then adds, “whether you keep it or not.” “why? that would ruin everything, it already has.” you’re getting angry now, which plunges you into angry crying, voice unsteady as you go on.

“the last time i saw tom was that night, and i guess it meant more to me than it did to him because we haven’t talked about it at all. he didn’t want to.” you swipe the back of your hand across your eyes, gaze stern compared to harrison’s soft one.

he drapes an arm around your shoulders, you curling into him with another sniffle. he doesn’t say anything for a minute, then he tries again. “i know you, y/n, and i know tom. you’ll kill yourselves not talking about this.” he’s right, no shit he is. avoiding telling tom how you feel, and your pregnancy on top of that, it’s eating you up inside. it’s swallowing you whole.

“what if he doesn’t want to be a dad? or- or i’m a shit mum?” you croak out, your doubts getting the best of you. “i can barely take care of myself. what am i supposed to do with a baby?” you’re leaning forward with your hands pressing into your temples. harrison’s hand moves to your upper back. “i- i don’t think i should have them. i... we can’t,” you conclude.

“tom loves kids,” he gives you a gentle reminder. “why would his own be the exception?” another good point, yet you still have rebuttles. “right, he’s a godfather and he’s really good with them and all that, but i’m not the right person, and it’s a terrible time,” you tell him all at once, in a rush to get your words out before harrison’s sway you.

“he’s never around, i’m doing my own stuff. we’re not meant for this.” you lift your head out of your hands and sit back on the couch. harrison returns his hands to his lap. he’s frowning at you, which you see from the corner of your eye. “i’m not going to force you to have the baby. just saying you have options.”

yeah, really shitty ones.

“either way, talk to tom.” harrison says this more like a demand so you’ll take his advice into actual consideration. “at least about the hookup.” your teeth sink into your lower lip, eyes watering for the nth time already.

you have no choice because he’s right again. you’ll never move on from what happened unless you and tom address it.

the next morning, you do what harrison told you to and invite tom over. he replied saying he was on his way maybe a minute later. he’s nervous to see you because yeah, but more so looking forward since it’s been so long. you’re so nauseous you barely have room for nerves. it’s morning sickness with a hint anxiety.

it feels almost normal when he first gets here, no how’ve you been and what are you up to these days? being as close as you and tom are, you’re not capable of such a dry conversation. personally, you still feel uneasy while he recounts a golfing incident him and harry got into the other day. you know something he doesn’t.

“when i tell you we flew, we flew,” tom makes a pushing forward motion with both hands. “right into the tree. i think harry, like, dented part of his face.” he lets out a breathy laugh, you forcing out one of your own. you’d be more interested without the fact that you’re expecting a child, his child, at the back of your mind.

tom exhales, shifting to face you on your couch. it’s funny how different things were when you and harrison sat in these same spots yesterday. so much has and is about to change.

“they had to send another golf cart to come get us. it was wild.” “it sounds wild,” you hollowly agree. he can tell you’re not too invested in hearing about harry’s terrible driving skills, so he changes the subject. “anyway, harrison told me he came over last night?” your stomach drops, heat coming over your whole body.

“did... did he say why?” you murmur with a look of urgency in your eyes. tom shrugs a shoulder, and casually. there’s no way he knows. “no, was he supposed to?” his tone stays playful, which you can thankfully tell. that puts you more at ease. “no. no, never mind. i would’ve asked you to come, but...” you’re searching through your catalog of excuses.

thank god tom says something else because you can’t find a good one. “it’s alright. i actually, um, had a work call.” a small smile spreads across his face, a proud one. intrigued, you raise both eyebrows. “what’d you talk about?” tom twiddles with his fingers in his lap. “i’ve been offered an audition for this really amazing film. everything works out, it’ll be huge for me.”

you’re smiling back this time, putting a hand over one of his. “woah, that’s incredible. i’m so happy for you, tom.” you lock your fingers with his from the back of his hand. he looks down at them, humbly shaking his head. “when is it?” “a few weeks from today. it films in brazil...”

oh. you can’t tell him now. it’s not worth him missing out on a milestone in his career for a baby you’re not sure you should have. that would be so unfair of you to ask. what are you going to do, not support his dreams for the first time in a literal decade? and, you’d call yourself his best friend through it all?

you guess this also means the way you feel about tom is one sided. he’s okay with leaving you after the most intimate moment you two have ever shared. you’ll dance around it the rest of your lives. better yet, act like the night never even happened. that’s not so easy to do when you’ve got a permanent reminder of it.

the thought makes you sick to your stomach. so sick, you could...

while tom is talking more about what the audition entails, you suddenly bolt up from the couch. you run for the bathroom, a hand cupped over your mouth. his face twists up in confusion from your disappearance. tom calls, “y/n/n?” out to you, but you can’t respond because your head is in the toilet. he rushes in when he hears you retching.

he gets onto the floor with you. you’re bent over, puking your guts out, back in another place where your life changed forever less than twenty four hours ago. tom pulls your hair out of your face and into a makeshift ponytail with one hand, his other on your back. that’s all you have in you. you stay over the toilet just to be sure.

saliva drips from your mouth, making you cough roughly, the sound echoing. tom moves so he’s next to you, keeping his hand in your hair and not caring one bit about the smell because he loves you and he’s utterly concerned about what he witnessed.

“love, are you sick?” he coos, searching for your eyes. they water from the intensity of everything. “morning sickness,” you answer without thinking first. shit. shit, shit, shit. it came out of you like more vomit, word vomit. there’s no going back now.

tom lets go of your hair with his eyes still on yours. his hand on your back then leaves you, fingers trailing down your body as they go. “morning sickness,” he repeats, putting it together. “you’re pregnant?” guilt taking over your features, you sit across from tom. you’re once again leaning against the bathtub, him against the counter.

“this isn’t how i wanted you to find out,” you admit and bring your knees up to your chest. “i took a test yesterday. it was positive.” your arms wrap around your legs, you now tearing up because tom figured it out. a shaky breath passes his lips. “i haven’t gone to my doctor or anything yet, but i-“

“are you keeping the baby?” tom cuts in. not to judge you for your choice, to find out what the fuck is going on before he travels across the world. you tighten your arms around yourself, grabbing your wrist. “i haven’t decided.” he gives you an understanding nod and reaches out for you. you dodge him. he might not want to do that after what you say next.

“tom, i... there’s more,” you whimper out. “yeah. i’m... i’m listening,” tom croaks, unable to hold in his infinite amount of emotions for a multitude of reasons. he’s losing you a second time. more tears spill from your eyes as you break the news, the news that will destroy what he’s been working towards his entire life.

“the baby is yours.” his face relaxes, looking almost relieved when you confess it. “when we slept together, uh,” you’re sure it’s obvious enough that you don’t have to go over the details. he’s tearing up himself. you reluctantly continue. “if you still want to audition, i get it. we don’t have to do this.”

“fuck the audition. fuck the whole movie. all of my movies, really,” tom surprises you by blurting out. he moves in until your legs are touching. “i’m staying. even if you don’t have the baby, i have to be here.” you watch in disbelief as he wipes away what are actually happy tears. “really? i was scared you’d resent me for it, or hate me even,” you mumble to him.

“y/n, what? why would i ever do that?” tom places a hand on your cheek, touch gentle and filled with love. you part your legs so he can be closer to you. he takes the space between them, thumb brushing over your skin. “i didn’t think you’d want to deal with all of this. i thought that night was only a hookup for you.” your voice wobbles under his gaze.

“no, are you kidding? i thought that’s what you thought.” he’s smiling now, eyes twinkling along with it. what he’s been meaning to tell you since you were only kids finally comes out. “i’ve loved you as long as i’ve known you, y/n. i always imagined myself doing this with you.” his words draw a quiet laugh from you, a happy one. “i know we were drunk, but i meant it all.”

the sincerity in his voice, the warmth in his eyes, they make you cry all over again. you’re getting used to it.

“i love you, tom,” you lean into him with a sniffle and a grin, his forehead now resting on yours, using his thumb to catch one of your tears. “i really do.” “i love you forever. i always have,” tom speaks lowly, breath fanning across your face. your hands grab at his shoulders. “so, you’ll stay? you’ll do this with me?” he reminds you of what he said before, this time a promise.

“forever.”

-

you ended up having the baby, and tom held your hand through the entire labor. nikki was holding his other hand, your mom holding your other hand. harrison had originally been in the room as well. when you started to push, he got freaked out and had to leave. your support system remained strong either way.

despite his repulsion of your daughter’s birth, you and tom decided to make harrison her godfather. he eventually became the godfather of your other two children also, which you had a few years later.

tom took a paternity leave from the industry so he could be with you and jamie. he’d also used his time off to propose to you, something else he fantasized about since year eleven in school. it wasn’t anything too grand because the whole world was already buzzing about you two, and a big gesture felt too impersonal with everything you’d been through together.

he did it in the form of passing a note, something you often did in class to avoid being scolded by your teacher for talking. the note came with a pencil to check off either the yes or no box, “will you marry me?” written above them. anyone else would have found it so unromantic, but you giggled as you checked off yes before your lips crashed into his smiling ones.

you were married shortly after the proposal, jamie as your flower girl and all your friends and family in attendance.

to do what he loved and stay with the people he loved, tom created his own version of hollywood in london. he took it upon himself to assemble a team and make a production company. harry behind the camera, harrison and tuwaine in the films, and tom either starring alongside them or directing. they give so many young actors tons of opportunities.

you eventually went back to work, too. it was like you’d never left, coworkers offering endless hugs and going over what you missed, not that you struggled getting into it. tom was there to celebrate every promotion, every compliment from your boss, every part of your life. jamie was also there, then liam and lucy.

all three of them are running around the house right now, putting on shoes and collecting their supplies for school. you take a sip of the orange juice liam didn’t finish with a lighthearted eye roll. tom chuckles as he passes you in the kitchen, getting the kids’ lunchboxes for them to minimize the chaos.

“you have that pitch meeting today, right?” he slips his hands through the lunchbox handles and walks over to you. “mhm,” you hum, mouth full with juice. his lips press to your temple, giving your waist a one handed squeeze. “you’ll smash it. always do.” “thanks, tommy.” putting down the cup, you reach up to button whatever parts of his shirt he didn’t have time to.

“aren’t you doing a casting? for the new script they sent?” you wonder aloud and smooth down the cotton material. “me and harry. should be interesting,” he remarks, you giving him a quick kiss back on his chin. they tend to have their artistic differences. “good luck with that. you do drop off, i’ll do pick up?” you pat one of the lunchboxes around his arms.

“deal.” tom goes in for a kiss on your lips, then a chorus of dad, we have to go led by jamie rings through the house. with a knowing smile, you push at his chest. “see you later. love you.” “love you, holland,” he bites back a grin of his own. his last name, now yours, suits you perfectly.

[baldi-7]

When playtime was about 3 years old Her mom passed away from cancer and was left with an abusive dad :( Sometimes the dad would hit her for no reason, he grabs the smile mask and demanded her to put it on so that no one can see her pain and what the father does to her. Another reason why she wears the long sleeve dress D:>. She goes to school every day with a smile mask on her face until one day she could not hold it in anymore. It was recess time everyone went outside except for playtime. Baldi ask what she was doing, playtime said she had some more work to do but did not want to do it later, so she stayed in to do her "work". Milady confused Baldi just look at her with a confused look but did not question her and said "Ok, you can join us when you are done" he smile at her then walk out the door. As soon as the door closed, she collapses with tears and dropped to the ground crying her eyes out. Baldi realized he forgot his hat, so he went back to the classroom, he was getting closer to the door but stopped he heard crying he was very confused he look left to right making sure no one was around, then he slowly opens the door and closed it quietly behind him he locks the door making sure no one entered. Baldi quietly walk towards her and sat next to her. Playtime stopped crying and look up slowly to see who was next to her she sighs and hug him. Baldi as well return the hug to her, Baldi asked her what's wrong Playtime eyes widen she was just stunned no one has every cared to ask her what was wrong she told him everything, Baldi was shocked and in disbelief he told her his childhood and was in a similar situation as playtime, but the parents change, and the teacher change unfortunately playtime's father never changes. Baldi pounder for an idea to make playtime happy and healthy. Finally, he got an idea it seemed crazy, but it just might work, he gently tapped playtime and he told her his idea "what if I... well, if you.... I-I wanna...... a--adopt you" he said with hesitation he did not see himself as a parent BUT he needs to try for playtime. Playtime blink a couple of times and slowly look at Baldi she jumps with joy but stopped and realized something how will she go with Baldi if her father is always with her and won't let her do anything. Baldi had another idea but it might be a little tricky to accomplish but he knows that playtime can do it, "Playtime this might seem a little crazy, but you need to sneak out at night you have to be fast and quiet, please i don't wanna see you getting hurt anymore also don't get caught this is only one chance and i know you can do it sweetie" he said with encouragement Playtime was scared a little but she had to focus. It was nighttime, already she packed her stuff and climb out the window It was easier than she expected she ran for her life going towards Baldi's car and they went to his house. The wind shut Playtime's window her "dad" heard it and went towards her room "KEEP IT DOWN YOU BASTARD!" he shouted there were silence in her room he got concern and burst through her door, turn on the light and found nothing she was not in her bed not in the closet nor underneath her bed. He punches the wall so hard that his knuckles started to bleed "You think you can run from daddy huh little girl" he said angrily. Baldi and Playtime finally got home "I do have an extra room" Baldi said "So i can set up your stu-" he got interrupted by playtime's hug "Thank you" she said, "Thank you so much" He smile and hug her for a while, the sun started to rise he carried her to the window and showed her the sunset. "Ya know playtime I'm going to start liking you being my daughter" he said while grinning Playtime nodded, "I-I love you dad" she said "I love you too" Baldi replied, and they both enjoy the sunset.

(I am bad with head cannons/stories)

[noyasboxdye]

Waiting- Tanaka Ryunosuke

Notes:  I can't really say to much with out telling the story so just have fun reading.

Pairing: Tanaka Ryunosuke x Male! Reader

WARNINGS: none it’s fluff

You and Tanaka have been best friends since you were in about second grade. He's always been there for you didn't matter what the situation was. He was your life line and you were his. So when you started distancing yourself from him he took it really hard. It's not like you were trying to hurt him you thought it was the best option for him. He was focusing on volleyball and his grades so he could get into his dream school and you were a 'distraction'.

But after two painfully slow and extremely boring weeks he had, had enough. He decided that he was going to find you and talk to you and get you to talk back since  the last time he tried to talk to you, you didn't say anything you only stared at the floor while trying to move around him.

He was over it. Yes he had his friends like Noya, Hinata, and the others but it just wasn't the same. He needs you, you're his best friend the longest you guys have gone with out seeing each other was three and a half days because he went on a family bonding camping trip but even then he still called everyday.

Tanaka was fidgeting around in his seat staring at the clock as if it'll somehow magically move faster. The seconds felt like minutes and the minutes felt like hours. But finally after 50 minutes of listening to his Spanish teacher explain the rules for his assignment the bell finally rang for lunch, he could finally try and talk to you and see why you've been avoiding him. He thought you just needed space but usually that only last like a school day and then you both  FaceTime or text all night after finishing homework.

Quickly standing up putting his books in his next class so he doesn't have to rush getting his things out of his locker he finally makes it down the flights of stairs and speed walks to the doors of the lunch room waiting for you to pass by him.

Finally seeing you be quickly grabs your arm takes you under the stair case and traps you into the corner not giving you a chance to escape. You know you can't but you try anyways.

'jeez dude really don't want to see me that bad'

"Could you move please" you mumble while looking at the floor. "No. " he says while crossing his arms. "What?" you say as you look up. "No, I'm not leaving until you tell me why you're avoiding me !" he says with an annoyingly determined look on his face. "I'm not avoiding you... " you mumble looking back down. "Yes you are dude we literally haven't talked in or out of school in two weeks" he says holding up his fingers showing you the number two. "Well -... I've.. been busy more or less. " you say looking down again. "No you haven't I know your schedule like the back of my hand and you know mines! You're avoiding me so tell me why and no lying!" he says like a parent scolding their kid. He waits for you to reply and you just stand there and don't say anything. You thought maybe if you just waited for the bell to ring everything would be fine like last time. But Tanaka wouldn't let you do that again, he was going to get you to talk one way or another even if that meant following you home and staying there.

"You can't just stand here and not say anything. I'm gonna get you to talk whether you like it or not. " You can tell that he's not going to let you go so you just decide to tell him. "...go- fine..." " Yes " he says doing a little victory dance. "Well...what...?" you say trying to stall because you really didn't want him to know that you liked him and what not, you thought it was embarrassing because not only did you not know how to control yourself around him but he was straight. You felt like an idiot but now's not really the time for sulking with your huge math test coming up. " Why are you avoiding me" he asked getting straight to the point. You knew it was coming but you were still kind of thrown off by it. Slightly rolling your eyes you say "I told you I've been -" he cuts you off, "Busy yeah yeah. Now what's actually going on, are you like mad at me or something what did I do? " he said getting a little sad at the thought of his best friend being mad at him for unknown reasons. "No, not at all I could never be mad at you bubs." you say feeling guilty. "So then what?" he says. He was getting impatient there was only so much time before you both had to go to class and he didn't know if he would get an opportunity to talk to you like this again any time soon. "Uhm- I'm giving you space because you said that you we're trying to get in to that volleyball program for your college application (idk if it's actually called that I just pulled that out of my ass lol) I didn't want to be a distraction." you said regretting telling him the truth. "You're not a distraction (M/N) I don't know why you thought that." he said getting closer. "Well didn't you bomb your test because of me..." you said like it was obvious. "What-... no. I bombed my test because I didn't study and I ended up falling asleep, but that was because I was binge watching assassination classroom with Noya. We gave up on studying so I wasn't prepared either way.  

You were relieved. I mean you still were going to  avoid him because you're like head over heals for this boy but still at least you know that him failing wasn't your fault.  Well now we have to think of another excuse instead of you liking him, maybe you'll try out for a sport. Maybe swim that seemed like a good sport ran from 3:40- 6:00 then your schedule would be full and then Tanaka would leave you alone.

"So can we hang out today? You don't have anything to do." he says with a hopeful glint in his eye. You couldn't say no not while he was looking at you like that and you just cleared things up... kind of. "Yeah sure! Where do you want to go the movies maybe? I don't have any homework today." you say while thinking about how much you missed him. "Yeah sure and we can get food after!" Tanaka says jumping a little while you giggled at his movements. "Ok meet me outside after school we can drop off our bookbags at my house and then we'll go." he says while smiling with the faintest blush on his cheeks. "Ok see you after science.

••time skip>••

The school day was over and you were at your locker grabbing the things that you need to take home. You grabbed your things and walked out to the front of the school to meet up with Tanaka. You really didn't know how you were going to make it through this afternoon and probably evening with him. "(M/N)" you turned your head towards Tanaka and smiled. He really did make you happy. You hated that you couldn't be around him with out blushing, getting flustered, or over thinking. He was perfect. He really could do everything and flawlessly.

"Hey Tanaka!" you say while running up to him. "So where do you want to go? Still want to do the movies?" he asks looking at you. "Yeah sure I'm up up for the movies. You want to eat before or after?" you ask. "Uhm-... I don't really care we can do what you want to." he says rubbing the back of his neck. "Ok maybe we can eat before and then watch the movie. What do you want to watch?" you say kind of unsure about yourself. "Maybe we can go see (F/M)?" he asks while you guys turn down his street. "Oh yeah sure."

It had felt like so long since you both hung out. It was refreshing being with him again he was like a breath of fresh air for you after stressing about homework, grades, projects, and things like that- basically school as a whole- he was like reminder that everything was going to be ok and that its fine to take breaks (you tend to over work yourself). It was one of the reasons you liked him.

"Come on!" he says as he turns on to his lawn. You hum in acknowledgement as you follow him. "You can put your stuff in my room. Do you want or need anything before we go?" he asks opening his door and walking towards his closet. "No, thanks though."  you say putting your bag down next to his bed. "Ok well I'm gonna change my shirt and grab a jacket." he says taking his shirt off and you blushing like a mad man. "Take one of my hoodies if you want I know how easily you get cold and how cold it can get in the movie theatres." he says looking for a new shirt. "Oh ok thanks dude." you say walking towards his closet and going through it finding one that you liked. "He should we pack a bag? Like with blankets and our own snacks and stuff." he says putting on his signature cologne and grabbing his jacket. "Yeah I think we should. I don't want to pay 20 dollars for 3 boxes of candy when I can get them for four at dollar tree." you say while finally finding a hoodie that you liked and putting it on.

You were going insane while packing the bag. every time you moved his hoodie scent made its way into your nose, you absolutely loved it. The nice smooth vanilla scent with hints of honey and mint it was paradise for you. You were seconds away from loosing it and squealing. I mean like you wouldn't because you would probably never be able to look at him again but still you get the point. He dumped a whole bunch of candy on the bed and said "there now we don't need to buy candy" while looking proud of himself. "Holy crap dude where'd you get this?!" his mom never let him eat a lot of candy so him having this much surprised you. "Secret stash. I've been saving it and buy it then not eating it. Specifically for occasions like this so I don't have to spend as much money.

You put the candy at the bottom of the bag then blankets, your chargers, and water bottles for the both of you. He walks up to the door and sticks his head out of it "SAEKO!!" you flinched slightly being caught off guard. "WHAT" you didn't even know she was home. "TAKE ME AND (M/N) TO THE MOVIES" he says sticking his head back in the room. "Are we sure that's the safest option?" you say feeling unsure about being in the same car as her while it's on and she's in the drivers seat. "I mean no it's not but like it'll be fine and plus would you really rather walk almost twenty minutes with this bag than let her drive us?" he says while zipping up the bag and and putting it on his arm. "Yes. Yes I would rather walk than be in a car with her driving have you seen her drive?" you say while laughing a bit. "Um no slandering my driving its immaculate." she says walking in. "Shawty bae... now you know that that's a damn lie." you say holding in laughter. "Well I think her driving is fine" Tanaka says grabbing you and Saeko's hand and walking out of his room into the kitchen to fill up the water bottle's.

Time skip

After telling Saeko thank for taking you too to the mall you both get out of the car and go inside. You still had time before the movie and were both really hungry you went to (F/R) waited for the waiters to take you to your seat. "So what are you gonna get?" Tanaka says finally breaking the silence. "Oh um I don't know maybe (F/F) still trying to decide." you say looking up at him from your phone putting it away from texting your (P/F) that you might bee home later than usual since it was already starting to get a little dark out. "Hello, I can take you to your table now" the waiter says as Tanaka goes to stand next to you an grab your hand. "Ok thank you." you say blush at the contact, it seemed like he was blushing but you brushed it off as the lighting of the restaurants lighting. You sit in your seat and say a quick thank you to the waiter as he handed you your menu. "Hi my name is Mafuyu and I'll be your waiter today, can I start you off with some drinks or do you need a minute?" the waiter says smiling and pulling out his notepad. "You can go first." Tanaka says putting his menu down with a small smile and a hint of blush on his cheeks.

Tanaka's POV

I'm going to confess to them tonight. I was suppose to a while back but I chickened out and then they started avoiding me so that made it harder, but I'm for sure going to do it tonight no matter what. I told Noya so he knows, he said that if they  rejected me that he had ice cream, candy, and Attack on Titan ready for me to come over all I had to do was be there.

I think they like me back I could be wrong though they don't really talk about there emotions and stuff. But I'd like to think that I'm pretty good at reading them. They said yes to hanging out which I thought they were going to say no to but didn't which is good so phase one of the plan is complete. Next phase is to make them get that happy glow that they get when they're really happy and comfortable around someone. I really like when that happens they're like-...ok you know those super cute, calming and aesthetic cottage core videos on tiktok where they like wear the pretty dresses and the elf ears and are really pretty and they make you feel fuzzy and warm on the inside? Yeah that's what they're like but better.

The waiter guy is flirting with them you can tell. (M/N) probably just doesn't care or isn't thinking of it in that way. "-naka, Tanaka! Jeez dude you were like super zoned out, anyways what do you want to drink?" (M/N) says while giggling. "Oh sorry a  loganberry will be fine." I'm literally so freaking embarrassed right now what the fuck.

"Would you like bread while you wait?" Mafuyu says looking up from his notepad. "Do you want bread" (M/N) asks looking down from the waiter to me. "Yeah we can get bread I don't really care" I say as I shrug my shoulders. "Ok then yea we'll get bread." (M/N) smiles at the waiter as he says that, god they're so pretty what the fuck. "Alrighty~... I'm gonna go get your drinks and bread and I'll be right back. "Ok thank you." (M/N) says going to look back at me. I look up from the table and see them blushing. I wonder if they think that Mafuyu guy is cute, maybe I mean he wasn't ugly he was pretty good looking and it did seem like he had a bit of muscle not a lot but enough to be able to throw a good punch. I notice (M/N) look up at me and "Thank you..." he said. What. "Why're you saying thank you" this really wasn't making sense I didn't even do anything for them to say thanks... well not that I know of. "For following me around and not letting me avoid you. I appreciate it, didn't know how much I missed you." I'm going to combust. Holy shat! They- He- I- HFRNJRSBRB!!! I probably look like a fire hydrant right now. "Oh- um you're welcome! It no big deal really I just missed you and didn't know what was going on hahah." I sound so awkward oh my god I'm embarrassing myself. Ok Noya said be fresh cut swag.

"Here are your drinks, bread, and butter. Are you ready to order or do you need a minute?" the waiters back I really don't like him. He keeps flirting with (M/N) and I mean like its not like (M/N) knows, and they would probably say no if he just asked like randomly and (M/N) isn't like prepared or anything or like doesn't know he's flirting with him. "-and what would you like to order sir?" I look up at the waiter, I mean if (M/N) did date him I could see why he's pretty cute and seems nice but that's also his job as a waiter so- "can I get a bacon cheese burger with a side of fries, Please." I smile at him as he writes my order down. "Is there anything else you'd like" Mafuyu asks looking in-between the both of us. "Yes, please instead of putting the pickles on the sandwich can you put  them in a little container please.  Oh- and can I get blue cheese with my burger. If it's not to much." I say. "Oh absolutely no problem, is that all?" he says writing in his notepad.

"Is that all?" Mafuyu says looking at (M/N). "No I don't want anything else, thank you though!" (M/N) says smiling and going to take a sip out of his drink. Mafuyu walks away putting his notepad in his pocket. "So what time does the movie start?" (M/N) says going to grab a biscuit and put butter on it. (sorry if you don't eat bread lol) "It starts at 9:30... it's 7:00 now so we should have enough time to walk around a little before the movies if you want." I say while eating my bread. "Ok." its kind of awkward right now... I'm just going to- "I'm washing me and clothes" I say while looking down. "To put a fucking story short I shoved a whole bag a jelly beans up my ass, an' it's 24 hours later an' I ain't find nun yet" He said looking up at me grinning widely. "You think those jelly beans ever come outta her ass?" I say looking back at him. "I don't know but I'm finna try and find out" (M/N) grabs his phone and sits there for like five minutes. "So- I can't find anything on it but I think she did...because she could like shat them out or like go to the doctors... I don't know- anyways...-" he says looking up from his phone.

Mafuyu comes up to the table asks if we want more bread and gives something to (M/N) smiles and walks away. "Oh my fucking god what fuck-... uhm... shit." (M/N) says with a panicked look on his face as he turns to I'm assuming look for Mafuyu. "What- what's wrong?!" I say worried. "Uhm- fuck-... he gave me his number! And I like someone!...What the fuck do I do with this?!" he says whispering a little. " I mean I don't fucking know give it back maybe...? You could always throw it away if you don't want to tell him." I say trying not to think about how I'm basically fuming at the fact that 1.) Mafuyu FUCKING hit on him!! 2.) he likes someone and I'm like 85% sure it's not me ugghhh. "Well obviously I can't do that, that's like mean! I'll just tell him- yeah it'll be fine just- tell him." he says starting to calm down and get blush a little. "Yeah and plus if he's a douche I can always fight him.." I say starting to feel a little better about the situation.

Time skip about 15 minutes

"Hello! Here is your (F/F) and here, is your burger with... the.. sides." he says sticking his tongue out looking determined. "Hey um thank you so much for the meal and stuff, but I'm... not interested so... take your number back." (M/N) says while slightly cringing and flinching when Mafuyu chuckles to himself. " oh my god no- please this is so embarrassing crap. Uhm I wasn't trying to flirt I just wanted to be your friend but didn't know how to ask shit- I should've put context- fuck-... I have a boyfriend.. plus I'm not a home wrecker I wouldn't try to ruin your date with your boyfriend please I feel so stupid. I'm sorry jesus christ I'm dumb." Oh- well it's fine... sorry haheh. And we aren't dating he's straight." (M/N) says smile getting smaller a bit. "Oh I'm so sorry jeez you both just were looking at each other like you were in love and he was holding your hand when you first walked in so I just assumed sorry-...! "Oh no it's fine we get it a lot anyways it's kind of funny to me.

Damn, that shit hurt. Yeah I'm totally going to tell him when the night's over because friend zoning dude really ?

After everything cleared up with Mafuyu we ate our food and left. We were walking around the mall going into different stores and getting things. "You want it?" Tanaka says noticing (M/N) looking at a vinyl by (F/S). "Oh umm yeah, but I don't have the money for it." you say looking down and going to look at different clothes. "Okay." he says going to look for new beanies. After walking around for about 15 minutes you both decided that you were ready to leave and start walking towards the movie theatre. You and Tanaka walked up to the cash register. Putting your things on the counter while the cashier scans your stuff. After the cashier finishes ringing your stuff up and Tanaka put his things down he did a awkward speed walk straight towards the section of vinyl's grabbed the one he was looking for and ran back.

"Sorry just had to grab one more thing." he says putting the vinyl you were telling him about earlier on the counter and pulling out his wallet. "No problem sir" the cashier says continuing to scan his things. Putting the clothes, vinyl's, and other random things in bags Tanaka grabs his bags off of the counter and bids a good day and farewell to the cashier, grabbing your hand and practically skipping out of the store. Getting on the escalader and rummaging in his bag he grabs the vinyl and pushes it towards you. "What?" you say confused on what to do with the 1931 edition of a CD. "Here. Take it. It's yours, you were saying how you wanted it but didn't have the money so... I got it for you. So take it." he says pushing the vinyl further towards you.

"You really shouldn't have. It was honestly no big deal like I would've been fine without it, I would've just bought it another time honestly-." you say rambling a bit. "Hey it's fine! I wanted to so don't worry about it too much." he says rubbing the back of his neck with a faint blush on cheeks. "Oh um ok... thanks then..!" you say looking at the floor while feeling your cheeks warm up. "Yeah it's no problem!" he says as you two step off of the escalator, walking towards the theatre.

While standing in line to get your tickets you say "which vinyl did you get?" Tanaka turns towards you while stepping forward and says "I got Tyler's flower boy and cherry bomb albums" hearing this your eyes light up and you reply with "dude we got to listen to them when you get home oh my god!" Tyler was one of the main reasons you and Tanaka were best friends. Well Tyler and the banana fish manga. (if you don't like tyler the creator then pick another artist this is just a head canon lol)

Flash Back

"Hey do you know where the manga section is?" you  say walking up to the blond haired boy. You were new to the school and  didn't know where anything was. The school was like a maze and everything seemed so far from each other. "Yeah, follow me!" the boy says practically skipping and running on his way there. The library was bigger than you thought it would be, your old schools library was nothing compared to this one. "So you like anime huh..." the tan skin boy says. "Yeah it's really cool." you say looking down the aisles for the yellow book with bold black letters.

"So what you looking for, I might be able to help you find it." he says walking closer next to you. "Oh no it's fine you don't have to!" you shaking your hands in front of you. "No really I want to plus your new your going to need help with stuff anyways!" he says in a semi hyper tone. "Okay well it's called banana fish and it has a yellow cover-" you say before getting cut off. "You sure that you want that book." he says looking at you with wide eyes. "Yeah, I got books 1 through 10 but I can't find the others." you say continuing to scan the shelves. "Well the books are over here... I don't know if they have 11 though it might be being used." he says walking to the next aisle as you follow him looking at all the other books they had. "Ummm yeah. Here!" he says holding books 11 and 12 in his hands shoving them towards you. "Oh thanks!... well I have to start heading to my next class so uhm... bye! Have a nice day!" you say walking towards the lady at the front desk to check out the books that you had been searching for, for what felt like like all of eternity.

"Hey, I can take you to your class if you'd like."  the newly met male says while you both walk out of the library doors together. "Well I mean I wouldn't want you to be late because of me." you say continuing to walk. "Its fine and we're going in the same direction anyways- well I'm assuming." he says both of you turning the corner. "So what class do you have?" the blond hair  male says turning his head towards you.

"Um I have chem." you say looking at your schedule to be sure. "Same! Which teacher?" he says smiling. "Oh I have Mr. McGill." you say hesitantly while checking your schedule once again. "I have him too, I can totally show you if you want." he says perking up a bit. "Yeah sure! Also, what's your name? I never got it." you say stopping in front of the classroom door and resting your hand on the handle. "Oh sorry heheh I'm Tanaka... and you are..." he says nodding his head your way. "I'm (M/N) nice to officially meet you, Tanaka." you say smiling. "Yeah, nice to meet you too."  Tanaka says staring into your eyes.

Real Time

"-(/N)! (M/N)!... you zoned out there for a sec, come on." Tanaka says reaching for your hand and pulling you towards the doors that lead you to the lobby and the usher who's waiting to take peoples tickets. "Sorry, I just got lost in thought you explain as you look for (F/C) as Tanaka tried to decide on which ICEE flavour to get.

Walking up to the counter Tanaka asks "hey which flavour should I get?" replying you say "Well your going to get coca cola and cherry mix anyways so why ask?" "You know-... you're right. And why do I ask...? I do it every time we go to the movies." he says you both waiting for the woman in front of you to finish ordering her stuff. "I honestly don't know. But which should I get?" you say watching the lady leave letting Tanaka order for the both of you. Ordering your own food was never really for you.

After ordering snacks paying for them (obviously) and going to meet the usher so you can watch the movie, you both walk into the theatre noticing that there were very few people in the theatre. "You would think that that there would be more people considering its new." you say whispering to Tanaka while trying to find your seats. "Yeah but maybe we're just early." he says sitting in his seat and getting comfortable. "Dude... the previews are over now people just aren't watching the movie." you say going for the big container of popcorn. "I missed this... like hanging out with you like this." he says smiling at you. You becoming grateful that you both are in the dark at the feeling of your face heating up and a fierce blush going across your cheeks. (sorry if you're dark skin I know people can't really tell when you're blushing.)

The movie started and you were about 30 minutes into it. Getting some more popcorn you and Tanaka both reach in at the same  feeling your hands caress one another. Blushing for what felt like the millionth time you grab the popcorn and shove it in your mouth. Tanaka blushes and mutters a quick sorry. "It's fine." you say grabbing your slushie and taking a sip.

After a while the movie got to the best part and that's when Tanaka decided to be a little bold.

Tanaka's Pov

I'm finally going to make a move. Then hopefully I can have more of a chance with (M/N). Deciding that now would be a good time to act on my idea I grab (M/N)'s hand in one swift movement and intertwining my fingers with theirs rubbing my thumb across the back side of their hand.

They seem a bit- "You okay? Do you want me to let your hand go?" I whispered in a questioning tone worried that they didn't like me holding his hand. "No you're fine. But can I have some of the Twizzlers and sweet tart ropes?" (M/N) whispered. "Yeah here." I state handing him the candy.

I think I might have a pretty good chance with him. But we've always had a touchy relationship so its hard to tell. I really hope that they do though. It would be so fucking embarrassing if I took all his kindness and touchiness the wrong way.

20 Minute Time Skip

Getting our garbage and heading towards the door as the movie plays the credits and closing song. Walking out of the theatre, missing the contact of (M/N)'s soft chubby/slender hands I go to grab (M/N)'s hand. Feeling a chill go up my spine while feeling my face progressively get warmer I ask "You want to spend the night? It's getting late." looking at him. "Yeah it is pretty late I tell my (P/F) that I'm staying the night."

Third Person POV

"They said okay." you say putting your phone in your pocket. "Okay, I texted Saeko and she said she's on her way. She's supposed to be no longer than 15 minutes away." he says checking his phone and going to sit on the bench waiting for the blond haired woman and you following in his footsteps. "Hey so can I talk to you about something..." the usually loud and hyper boy says you barley able to hear him. "Yeah sure what's up?" you say going to face him. "So um I'm Bisexual..." he says neevously playing with his thumbs and avoiding eye contact. "That's so cool dude! I'm glad you felt comfortable enough to tell me!" you say a soft smile on your cheeks.

'Maybe I have more of a chance now... nah prolly not he's fucking whipped for Kiyoko' you think as Tanaka smiles giving you a hug and you doing the same to him. "Thanks dude." he says as his phone notifications goes off and reading the message saying that his older sister is outside waiting for you both. "Hai (M/N)! So how was the date~?" she says a huge smile on her face. "HUH- a date what no- he doesn't like me like that we're friends." you say giggling a bit feeling a slight pain in your chest. You really didn't want to be friends with him but as long as he's in your life you feel s though you'll be fine. "Saeko shut up and take us home." he says rolling his eyes playfully with a small smile as he grabs your hand, once again making you blush.

Arriving home and walking through the door you get a smell of fresh baked cookies. "What's that smell it smell so fucking good oh my god!" you say as you and Tanaka basically sprint into the kitchen. (On a Usain bolt type beat.) "Holy shit they smell so good." Tanaka says mouth watering and going to get  a plate to put some on for you both. "Hey- nuh uh no- these aren't for you! Make your own I still have some cookie dough left use that." Saeko says snatching the plate from Tanaka and putting it back in the cabinet after slapping his hand away from the cookies.

"What you making them for cAoCh uKaI~" Tanaka says in a mocking tone. "As a matter of fact yes I did. I owe him and he told me to make him cookies." she says sticking her head up and crossing her arms. "Bleh! Saeko could you please not flirt with him he's my coach dude I thought we agreed people like that were off limits!" Tanaka says in a whiney type voice practically throwing a temper tantrum.

"Oh shut up it's just cookies and plus I'm the older one here so you can't tell me what to do!" Saeko says sticking her tongue out, Tanaka doing the same. "Come on (M/N) we're going up stairs. She's about to start fawning over him" Tanaka says fake gagging while you giggle making your way up the stairs.

After going up stairs you take a shower remembering you didn't have any clothes. "TANAKA~!" you yell opening the door to the bathroom and wrapping your towel around your body and walking towards his room. "Yeah?!" he says opening he door and peaking out of it. "Do you have any clothes?" you say grabbing your leave in conditioner and combing/picking out your hair. "Yeah just pick something out. Anyways I'm gonna go take a shower." he says grabbing his clothes towel and walking out the door.

Coming back in Tanaka flops on his bed scooting next to you resting his head on your shoulder. "What you watching?" he mumbles snuggling more into you. "Twitch." you say resting your head on his. "Oh. Who's that?" he says looking up at you. "Quackity and Corpse." you said. "Oh they're cool." he says. Silence filling the room.

"Hey can we talk?" Tanaka says sounding a bit to serious for your liking. "Uh yeah sure." you say taking your headphone out and sitting up facing him. "So we've been friends for a while now and we're like super close, obviously, and I really like being around you and spending time with you and stuff..." Tanaka says playing with his fingers and hesitating slightly. "Tanaka what's going on? You okay, you bouta like die or something." you say jokingly trying to lighten to mood.

"Okay wait no- so um-... I kind of like... you... romanitcally-" he says avoiding eye contact. "Huh?" you said thinking you miss heard him. "If you don't like me back that's fine. We can pretend I never said anything, I'll just get over it-" he said before you cut him off with a kiss on the cheek, practically looking like a rose. "Um I like you too." you say smiling at him. "Really" the short haired boy looks up at you practically glowing. "Yeah. You wan to go on a date?" you say gushing hard as ever. "Yes!!- I mean yeah sure..." he says scolding himself for not being cool. "Okay." you say smiling at yourself and going to lay back down trying to calm yourself.

"You want to watch something?" he says laying down next  to you putting his head back to the spot it was at before. "Yeah... what you want to watch?" you say hugging him. "Wait so I found this girl on Youtube and I know you don't really watch content like hers but she cool as hell. Her Youtube name is liyah li." he says grabbing his remote and opening youtube.

After watching the recommended channel you both went down a rabbit hole watching her videos for a while, finally deciding that you wanted to go to sleep you both put on a random show him holding you in his chest kissing you on the nose and falling asleep with a smile on your faces.

[fullbushfemme]

Meeting the Mayans

word count: 1,804

summary: You thought you were prepared for anything. Growing up with four brothers, you had been bitten, beaten, thrown out of trees, concussed, stabbed, practically any violent act you could possibly think of, you had endured. For a kindergarten teacher, you were tough. You had the scars to prove it. That was, of course, until the day you met the Mayans.

unnamed mayan x fem!reader

warnings: brief mentions of blood, hostage situation, and a shooting.

author's note: I've had this idea in my head for ages now and I'm tempted to make it a series. The only issue is that I can't decide which Mayan I want to star (since they aren't named in this fic). I'm tempted to use this as a jumping off point for multiple fics, writing different stories from this initial incident involving different Mayans, but I'd love to hear any thoughts y'all might have :)

-I also haven't written anything outside of academic works in years so go easy on me <3

Santo Padre Septembers were always your favorite. It was sticky and hot, enough to make anyone want to jump into a pool fully clothed, but school was back in session, which meant you got to meet a new hoard of bright-eyed, eager five year olds. You had spent the last month preparing your classroom for their arrival. Nine am to one pm every day for four weeks was dedicated to decorating your classroom, making name cards, making sure every student had all the supplies they needed. Inside every desk you placed glue and markers and pencils and workbooks and scissors...everything a little kid would need to express themselves. And all of it out of your own pocket. You took it upon yourself to spoil these kids rotten.

Two weeks into class, you already knew everyone’s names, their favorite color, their pets, and whether or not they were allowed to watch TV after six o’clock. You knew who was friends with who, who couldn’t eat peanut butter, and who was most popular. This year’s class was going to be great, you just knew it.

It was a humid Friday afternoon. The room smelled like Elmer’s glue and pencil shavings, with stray scraps of construction paper strewn about the floor after the kids decided this week’s art project was going to be making dinosaurs out of construction paper and glitter. You were staying after class to clean up and vacuum, and to take the class rabbit home with you since no one had signed up to care for him this week, when you heard a knock at your door.

You looked over to the open door, squinting into the sun, trying to make out who it was. But no one was standing in the doorway. “Forget something?” you called out, thinking that a student must’ve left a lunch box or notebook and was feeling shy.

“Not exactly,” a deep voice responded, sending a twinge of fear through your body. You knew that voice. “I was hoping my baby sister could help me with something.”

A lump had formed in your throat that you tried to swallow, to no avail. “What are you doing here?” you choked out, standing from where you were picking up paper scraps.

“I need you to help me hide. Quickly.” Your older brother stepped into the classroom, gun in hand, pupils wider than you had ever seen them. He must’ve been high, you thought, panicked. What had he gotten into now? All four of your brothers were known to be trouble-makers to varying degrees. A few had been to prison for petty crimes, but the brother that stood before you had gotten wrapped up in drug trafficking years ago. He scared you the most. They had all promised your parents that they would keep their lives separate from yours, that they would never put you in harm's way. But it didn’t last. It felt like every other week you had a bruised or beaten brother on your doorstep, begging for help or a place to stay. And today, it was to ask you to hide them.

Your eyes flitted to the large windows overlooking the grassy courtyard where a few children sat waiting for their parents to pick them up. Hide. Hide from what? Who was coming after him? Would they hurt the kids?

“N-no,” you stammered, taking a step backwards. You couldn’t risk putting any kids still on campus in danger. “You can’t hide here. You have to go. You have to go right now.” You could feel a pit in your stomach begin to form as your brother took slow, long strides toward you.

“No?” he spat, completely dumbfounded by your refusal to help him. You had never turned him down before. He was family. You never said no to family.

You swallowed hard before repeating yourself. “No,” you responded, with more conviction this time, although you knew he could see right through you.

You took another step back, but ran up against your desk. Your phone was in the top drawer. Could you reach it fast enough? If you even could, who would you call? The police? That was a good way to get murdered and leave a teacher-shaped stain on the floor for the kids to come back to on Monday. Gripping the edge of the table so hard your knuckles turned white, your brother broke the ominous silence before you could.

“I’m not asking you again, hun,” he spat, now so close you could smell him.

“I can’t,” you whispered, your eyes welling up. “The kids…”

He furrowed his brow for a moment, shocked at the idea that you could actually turn your own flesh and blood away. You had always helped him, no matter how many times your parents told you not to, no matter how many times your life was put in danger. He couldn’t grasp the idea that you would put your foot down when it came to endangering other people, when it came to endangering your kids.

“They’ll kill you, you know,” he seethed, looking back over his shoulder towards the open door. There was a low rumbling growing louder and louder, but that wasn’t to whom he was referring. He was talking about your other brothers. “I told them I’d go to my baby sister, that she’d help me. She always helps me. Why would she flip on me now? Why wouldn’t she help family?” His grip tightened around his handgun as he leaned in to threaten you. “If anything happens to me, they’ll know to come to you first. They’ll know you couldn’t protect your own family.” His breath was hot against your neck. “Now,” he sighed, “Help me hide. And tell them you haven’t seen me in months.”

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” a man shouted from outside, causing your brother to grab hold of your arm. Those tears you had been holding back finally fell down your cheeks as your brother pulled you in front of him, placing you between the stranger and your brother. You could barely make out any details of the man from outside because of the blinding sun, but you could tell he had a gun. And that gun was much bigger than your brother’s. As the man moved into your classroom, at least five more men appeared and followed him in, all with guns pointed at your brother.

At this point, you were frozen. The lives your parents had so desperately tried to keep apart were crashing together, their worst nightmare coming true. The two of you were stuck, with only one way out. And he knew it. He gripped your arm tighter, making sure your body could be used as an effective human shield. The barrel of his gun was shoved into your ribcage, his face buried into the back of your hair.

“See what you’ve done?” he seethed. You looked at all of the men placed around the room. Leather-clad men on top of a backdrop of crudely painted rainbows and dogs. You hadn’t brought these men here. You didn’t anger a group of gun-toting men. And yet somehow, this was your fault.

“We’re only here for you, kid,” a low, rough voice called out, a different one than before.

But he wouldn’t let them take only him. He was bringing you down with him. He was willing to sacrifice his own family to keep from going down alone.

The seconds ticking by felt like hours. Your heart pounded against your ribcage, desperately trying to break free. But you could do nothing besides stand still. All you could do is hope and pray that these men that had followed your brother here had enough decency not to kill a kindergarten teacher caught in the crossfire. But your brother refused to give them that opportunity.

“If I go,” he yelled, raising his gun to your temple, “she goes too.”

These words would haunt your every thought for the rest of your life. But in that moment, all you could think about was the weapon pressed against your skin. Your brother wasn’t just willing to bring you down with him, he was willing to kill you himself. And the thought of it made you sick. It made you want to curl up into a ball and scream on the top of your lungs. You opened your mouth to cry out, but your brother hit you across the head with the butt of his gun before you could.

The men opposing your brother yelled, harsh words were exchanged, but all you could hear was a ringing in your ears. Tensions rose. Guns were raised. Blood dripped down your face and mixed with your tears. Your senses were betraying you, one by one, blending every sensation into one incomprehensible nightmare.

And then, a single gunshot rang out, making you acutely aware of the severity of the situation once more.

A scream escaped your chest as you fell to your knees, free from your brother’s death grip. You brought your hands up to your ears and squeezed your eyes shut, hoping it would all be over.

But it wasn’t over. It wouldn’t end. No matter how hard you prayed, you were still on the floor of your kindergarten classroom. Your brother was still prepared to kill you if he felt threatened. Someone was shot...someone was shot but you couldn’t bear to look. You wanted to look, you had to look, to see if it was your brother that was shot. But before you could muster the courage to open your eyes, two arms wrapped around you and pulled you into an embrace. It couldn’t have been your brother, it was much too gentle. But if it wasn’t him, then who?

It took a moment to open your eyes, but when you did, you looked up to see who was holding you. His face was kind, with dark brown eyes filled with worry as he looked down at you. He opened his mouth to say something to you, and he probably did, but you couldn’t hear him over the pounding in your head. He was a stranger to you, and yet he clung to you to keep you from seeing the mess behind you. Like he truly cared for your wellbeing. He pulled you in closer to him, placing his chin on top of your head the way your father did when you were young. It felt...safe. And all you wanted to do was collapse into him and allow yourself to feel safe. You let your head fall into his chest. You let your head fall into this stranger’s chest. And just as you did, two white patches on his left breast caught your eye. Two patches that read: Mayans, Santo Padre.

[twisted-imagines]

Heyo! May I request headcanons for how Leona and Azul would react to their respective SO being unassumingly strong? Like they look like they possess average strength but they are able to carry a lot of heavy things (easily the dorm leaders) or hold their own in a physical fight. I hope this makes sense 😅😅😅

Unbelievable, I'm back! With a request, nonetheless💖 I wonder if you missed me, hehe? Man, did I miss you all and my precious boys~ It's shorter than usually and I got hit with a writer's block, but it'll try to pick up my pace from now on >:3

But for now, please, enjoy💗

Unassumingly strong S/O

Leona Kingscholar 🦁

Rays of sunset gently caressing his face woke Leona up from his post-lunch nap. Still groggy from his sleep he rose up just to look at the clock. Almost evening, the last classes in college ended at least two hours ago. But that wasn't important to Leona. What really bothered him, was the absence of one customary part of his sleeping routine: your warm form beside his. To have you curled up into his side or just sitting near him telling about your day always made his dreams more pleasant and now that he got used to it, not having you beside him rubbed him the wrong way. You should have already been there, so where were you? The lion didn't want to think about the worst, but only the most alarming conclusions came to his mind. The bed shifted beneath him when he got up, but before he could even take a step a loud stomping resonating in the hallway drew his attention. Ruggie was at his doorstep, disheveled, and clearly agitated.

"Leona-san! You need to see this, come. Quick!"

Leona could finally let out the breath he took when Ruggie rushed him out of his room and to the common room. Several students were running to-and-fro around the other three beat-up Savanaclaw residents. The dorm leader stopped at the door, relieved to not had seen you there. And why would you be there, though? Nonsense. But it was really the only thing he was worried about since the sight before him was all too common for Leona at that point. He was about to turn to Ruggie and ask what all that fuss was about until a conversation between couch occupant and the students treating him reached his ears.

"Ouch! That hurts, man! Ugh, if not that piece of-!"

"Don't even think about ending that sentence. You're lucky that it wasn't the dorm leader who got his hands on you."

"Yes, dumbass, can you even imagine what would have happened to you three if he found out you fought his mate- Wha? Huh?! Leona-san? Since when did you-"

Leona crossed the room in a few powerful strides only to pick the unfortunate student by his collar. An unbridled fury grimaced his face.

"What's about [Y/n]? Tell me, your puny life depends on it!“

"Nishishishi, what can he even tell? That he and his thick-headed friends got completely obliterated by a single, small human?"

"Listen, I'm very sorry about it, but it was just self-defense!"

Leona dropped the scared, shaking from fear student to the floor in favor of rushing to your self, who too entered the room. He swiftly checked you for any injury and let out a relieved sigh. From what he could see you were completely fine, while those who harassed you were very much not, trembling and holding each other, bruised and humiliated. Kingscholar could only look bewildered at them, and then at you, at them, at you.

"Leona, I'm really sorry, I didn't want to hurt them so bad."

Your ramble became faster the more your boyfriend looked at you with a blank look, not even saying a word to you.

"...so if there's some disciplinary punishment or otherwise or will take it, I-"

A snicker interrupted your speech. You looked at the man before you stunned. Before you could utter even another word he erupted in a fit of roaring laughter, it resonating in a completely silent dorm.

• Ah, Leona can't genuinely remember when was the last time he laughed that hard. The whole situation is so amusing to him, there isn't't a boring day with you, is there?

• Of course, you'll face no punishment, vice versa, you'll be celebrated. His darling, his kitten, was actually a mighty carnivore all along. He's going to mark the day, when he finally found out about that.

• Never would he think, not a snowballs chance in hell, that you had any physical strength in you, but you managed to prove him wrong. Yes, he was very close to destroying poor souls who tried to harass you, but if not for them taunting you and being beat up in the process, he wouldn't have such a discovery to laugh at. They're getting away with it, a living example of why exactly one ought to not touch dorm leader's lover. They're not dining with everybody that evening though, no matter how much tasty food there is.

• He doesn't think a lot about this discovery at first, that's just another gimmick of yours and he loves it, he loves you, but does it turn his world upside down, both figuratively and literally, when you, fed up with him lazing around the greenhouse and trying to make you lie down with him, swing him over your shoulder and carry him out. His pupils are just two saucers. He hangs speechless from your shoulder and until he feels ground under his legs he doesn't register what happened.

• Congratulations, now you have Leona Kingscholar living in your arms. He'll just use you as a personal carriage and how can you deny him, when he's so cutely snuggling up to you. Oh, he knows what he does to you and isn't ashamed to take advantage of it.

• He's quite pleased to know that you can hold your own in a physical fight, even in a magical world they're still too common. He even starts to watch himself, especially when he thinks he went too far with his teasing since you do have a strength to turn it on him. Well, he doesn't really protest. A bit of roughhousing and a tickle fight never harmed anybody, it amuses Leona when you start them.

• He admires you more than anybody else at this point. You're badass and you know it, and he couldn't be more proud. He sleeps soundly, knowing that you can stand up for yourself if the situation calls for it. He still much prefers to have you safe in his arms, or vice versa, so don't leave him for longer, than you should.

• One time he just casually asked you, if you could wield any weapon with a very unsettling glint in his eyes. He told you that a lot of people in Afterglow Savannah were proficient in some war art, it was a very respected tradition, and some of the masters could teach you, if you visited his homeland with him. He left the question open, but sometimes you still wonder what did he actually mean?

Azul Ashengrotto 🐙

Night Raven College was in a state of emergency. All students were to follow their seniors to a safe location, while teachers and student council were dealing with the threat. The reason for such a panic was a single creature. Highly dangerous at its full potential and untamable, college's Chimera was much less imposing than it's wild nature sisters, but still a difficult opponent for students at their Magic Defense classes. Apparently this time it decided to give a special lesson to everybody.

"The beast ran in that direction, don't let it get away once again, surround and subdue it!"

Azul's order rang in the hallway, spurring every present student to action. At the state of total disarray, the youth was the only one who reacted fast enough to rally his fellow students and direct them properly. But to say the hunt was going awfully is to say nothing. The students, so much for them being skilled at magic, had no idea of command work. Ashengrotto had already regretted sending Leech twins away with Octavinelle juniors, it would have ended so much faster if they were present. But alas, after running around the campus for more than half an hour, Azul could finally hope they would catch the damned beast at last.

"It's running away, catch it! Why are you standing still?"

"Can you not complain for five seconds, pretty boy? Want me to fix your make up with my fists for you?"

"The Chimera is resisting magical attacks, somebody please sacrifice yourself for the greater good. We need to neutralize it!"

No, they were hopeless. Azul could only observe the people he saw daily at college lose all respect he had for them in less than an hour. Azul was genuinely contemplating to just give up and let the teachers, who got lost halfway too somehow, handle it. At that point he wasn't even chasing it, disappointedly watching how it was running away into the sunset.

Until it suddenly didn't. Chimera crashed with a loud thud, falling to the floor completely motionless. And the one who was standing above it with a bright red crowbar was none other than you. Shocked, he slowly approached you and the unconscious animal.

"Um... [Name]?"

"Sup' Azul! You were late for our date so I returned to check up on you. This Chimera is so big! It's the first time I've seen it. Where should we carry it?"

"Yes, yes...You'll still meet it at your Magic Defense classes later the semester. To the classroom on the third floor, let me-"

Before Azul could lift it with magic you had already hoisted it on your shoulder and awaited for his lead.

Well, it was certainly a dream so he didn't have to freak out, right? His dear significant other couldn't possibly knock out a huge beast in one punch?

• Wrong. You did. You also had enough strength to carry it to its cage. You could do even more than that. The more Azul was coming to the understanding of it, the more he was freaking out. Until he completely stopped responding to you. The date had to be canceled, unfortunately. You led him to his dorm, while he was having an identity crisis.

• When he finally snaps out of his state you're so going to be bombarded with questions. They won't stop, and you're not even sure he addresses them to you. How did you hide it and why? Or was he just oblivious? But you look so demure, look at Jack for example and look at you! How?

"Well, I'm pretty soft, but here touch - there muscles underneath!"

He's now more lost than before, after making contact with your bare skin.

• It's going to take him time to come to terms with your actual strength. Lack of magic not equating to being powerless didn't register in his brain, and he thought it was actually very ignorant of him. He respected you before, but now he's in awe. His significant other is very strong and Azul thinks it's beautiful.

• When he has too much work and is stubborn about cramming it all into one day, even though he's already drooling on his notes and slips down his chair, you just lift him from his seat and parade through Monstro Lounge to his room with Azul blushing madly in your arms. Leech twins think it's the most hilarious thing they've ever seen. Azul is very embarrassed, but it also feels so good to be carried around by you, he feels the most special man in the world. He politely asks you to not handle him like that ever again, while he clings to you like a baby koala. It's obvious where he wants to be.

• He has a love-hate attitude to manhandling. It certainly feels exciting when you tug him on your lap if he's passing by, or envelop him in a hug if you're happy, but he's also quite shy about it, especially if there're people around you. Sometimes he wants just to find a pot big enough to hide.

• He likes your way of solving problems. You don't have to choose the best spells that would give you an advantage against a certain opponent, neither do you have to worry about things like mana and blot. You can only rely on yourself in a fight. He wheezed when you suggested, that Floyd wouldn't be a dangerous opponent to you since his unique magic wouldn't deflect a punch to the face. Floyd wasn't impressed with that logic, but he kept quiet.

• Azul is quite pacifistic, if he can mitigate the conflict and reach a consensus that would benefit every party, mostly him, he will try to avoid a fight. But when even he can't do this, you enter the picture. You know that those jerks are too arrogant and they should be prescribed a nice, educating blow to a face. Azul is mortified, when you escalate things, for he usually doesn't see such scenes, Floyd or even sometimes Jade leave them offstage. He quickly comes to his senses though and helps you out. Best believe you're going to get away with it, and even will be treated as a victim. Who in their right mind will think that you, of all people, can deal any serious damage to anybody?

• He feels a bit weird when you're the one carrying his shopping bags, or screwing the jars open, but he learns to roll with it, even starts to enjoy it. And his face when he sees you carrying a huge table all on your own, because he just so mentioned, that he didn't like how it stood in the Lounge? Priceless.

• No matter how much time passes he'll still react surprised when he sees you displaying your power, but it's also one of the qualities he loves about you. Azul treats your unusual strength as your special appeal and couldn't be more proud to be your lover.

• He's ecstatic that he can just casually mention to anybody picking on him, that "his significant other can and will snap you in half". Maybe you can, maybe you can not, but you just let him have his fun. The truth is that you will do your best at any given time to protect your boyfriend.

[juniorgman187]

Serpent of Eden (Reid Series - Part 3)

~ Reader’s one-night-stand with Spencer turns into a year long semester ~

Summary: After a month of smooth sailing, Reader and Spencer finally cross paths on campus and spoiler alert - it’s not pretty. Couple: Fem!Reader x Professor Spencer Reid Category: Angst, Fluff, (eventual) Smut, Series Word Count: 1.7 (ik i promised no small chapters but this ones slightly more spicy and its in preparation for better, longer chapters) Content Warning: Age-gap, teacher student relationship A/N: POV switches from Reader to Spencer indicated by “_ _ _”

PART 2 HERE!

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

It was easy to maintain a romantic relationship and to believe that everything was alright when we never had to see each other at school.

What’s harder was being in a professional setting and forcing ourselves to confront the reality that what we were doing was wrong. 

Just plain wrong.

We must’ve lucked out in the first few weeks of our relationship because it was smooth sailing for the entire first month. We’d even gotten into a routine - found our groove, if you will. 

Most often, we would meet at a place far from Hollis, where we knew we wouldn’t run into anyone who would recognize us. There we could just be (y/n) and Spencer; and there I would get lost in the good times and the bliss of the moment to the point of forgetting that we weren’t just (y/n) and Spencer - we were student and teacher, too. Other times, I’d come over to his apartment, but given my living situation, he had never come over to mine. 

It was somewhere around our one-month anniversary when our luck ran out. 

Holly had come into the room while I was finishing (or at least attempting to finish) reading a court case. 

“Are you going to the Promotional FBI Seminar?” She slid a large pamphlet on my desk, never minding the fact that she’d just haphazardly thrown the pamphlet in the spot where my book lied, causing me to lose my place on the page. Though I didn’t outwardly display my frustration, my agitation did grow beneath the surface. 

“What’s that?” I asked her, not out of sincere curiosity, but more so because I wasn’t even really listening to what she’d said before, and I’d pushed the pamphlet out of the way before I even read it. 

“A couple guys from the FBI are coming to talk to us about the job, like all the requirements to be hired, how much it pays - stuff like that.” 

Holly’s voice didn’t make for great background noise, especially when she started rambling while I tried to continue reading. 

“Are you going?” I asked. Again, this wasn’t a sincere question, just a way to make it seem like I was listening. 

“Yeah, and I really want you to come with me. I think you’d like it. You’re really into crime stuff, aren’t you?” 

“Yeah, yeah…” I said in a daze, obviously distracted by my other priorities.

“So you’ll come?”

I should note that I faintly recognized the name and premise of the seminar, but I couldn’t quite place where I remembered it from, and I was far too preoccupied to pay any further attention to the topic, so it slipped out of my mind almost as fast as it entered it. 

It was this moment here where Spencer’s eidetic memory would’ve come in handy. 

You see, the reason I weakly recalled the seminar was because just three days ago, Spencer had told me he was going to be a guest speaker for it. But again - I didn’t remember that, and so without any recollection of this information, I told Holly I’d go just so she’d stop bothering me about it. 

Unbeknownst to me, I’d just agreed to attending my own personal hell. 

I woke the next morning to Holly violently shaking me. 

“(Y/n), we gotta go! We’re so fucking late!”

Still half-asleep, I mumbled, “Huh?”

“The seminar started at 9:42 and it’s 10:36 right now.” 

This was enough to jolt me awake and get me out of bed.

There was just something about the pressure of being late that forced me into a mode where I could get ready in an ungodly short amount of time. I could never get ready that fast unless I was late for something, which makes no sense. 

Holly and I ran from our dorm, through the courtyard, and into the classroom, somehow managing not to trip once on the way there. I was actually quite proud of that. 

I couldn’t tell you if it was our breathlessness, our late departure, our struggle to find open seats, or a combination of the three, but we’d commanded the attention of the entire room - and the attention of someone I had yet to notice, too. 

“There’s a free seat over there. I can sit in the one over here.” Holly told me, suggesting that if we wanted to sit anywhere, we’d have to be separated. I followed her finger to the empty seat, shuffling awkwardly and apologizing profusely to the people I disturbed by approaching. I was so caught up in the hysteria and chaos to even bother looking up at the stage, hindering my ability to meet my impending doom any sooner. 

On the way to my seat, I noticed the copious amounts of notes being taken by virtually every student in the room, so rather than taking any time to look up, I was searching my bag down below me for note taking materials. 

But as they say - third time's a charm. 

After I’d settled into my seat, I finally looked up from the floor and it was then that I was transported back to a month ago - an eerie parallel to this exact moment. 

“Holy shit,” I muttered, earning sneers from the people sitting next to me who I’d clearly disrupted with my profanity. 

“Sorry,” I whispered to them, for I was truly sorry. I just couldn’t help myself. When I saw him, my stomach dropped. I had a feeling he’d already seen me, but I was too disorderly before to notice. 

I did, however, notice how he eyed me from the stage, even doing a double take when we locked eyes. 

“Most of us have done extensive work in areas such as …” His voice faded while my mind swirled.

We have got to stop meeting like this, Spencer. 

Our eye contact was too much for me to handle, so I was the first to break away. Through the entire question-period, I kept my head down to avoid any eye contact I could. 

“Well, that’s all that we have for you today. Before you go, please hand in your applications if you filled them out.” The other lecturer advised. 

I was well on my way out of the room even before he dismissed us, but I was drawn back by the sound of the sentence, “Excuse me, Miss? Could you stay back for a moment?”

I briefly walked backwards before turning on my heels and meeting those eyes that I desperately didn’t want to. 

“I noticed you came in late and I thought you might want to know the information you missed -” Spencer paused to look over his shoulder, noticing his colleague was attending to someone else and therefore, too engaged in that conversation to interfere with ours. 

“(Y/n), what are you doing here?” He asked me in a hushed tone, a stark contrast from his sweet tone from before. 

“I’m so sorry, Spencer. I completely forgot that you were a speaker for this seminar. I didn’t even know I was coming until last night when my roommate asked me to come with her. I would’ve warned you if I knew. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to put you in this position.” 

My apology was sincere seeing as I promised Spencer we would never run into each other. In fact, it was the sole reason we agreed to stay in this relationship - the mutual guarantee that we wouldn’t be put in these situations, but here we were. 

In this fucking situation. 

“No, it’s fine. I was just surprised to see you, that’s all.”

Spencer could tell I was flustered and truly apologetic for my ignorance, and he was almost about to reach out and rub my upper arm comfortingly when his actions were cut short by the looming presence of his fellow guest speaker. 

“Hi there. David Rossi.” He introduced himself by extending his hand into the space between us. “And you are?” 

“(Y/n) (y/l/n).” 

_ _ _

“(Y/n) (y/l/n).” 

It was like watching my worst nightmare come alive. 

If I ever imagined introducing (y/n) to my work family, this certainly wasn’t the plan. I just hoped to God that if Rossi and (y/n) ever met again in the future, he wouldn’t suddenly obtain my eidetic memory and recall her familiar face from this exact moment. 

“Got any questions for us?” Rossi coyly asked her. Once more I prayed to God that his profiling skills hadn’t just improved drastically and that he could sense the tension between the two of us. It almost seemed like he asked that question just to tease her because he knew what was really happening. But then again, that was probably just my paranoia speaking. 

She looked mortified when he asked this, even glancing back at me briefly as if to ask for a reprieve. “Um, no not really. I-I was just telling Dr. Reid that I’ve applied to audit his class before, but was always rejected.”

“That’s a shame. Well, maybe I can look into that. You know, put in a good word for you.” Rossi chuckled, nudging (y/n)’s shoulder to suggest he’d help her. She only shyly laughed and took a step closer to the door. 

“Oh, no you don’t have to do that for me.” 

“Nonsense. I’d be happy to do it.” 

“Thanks, Mr. Rossi.” With a thankful smile, (y/n) pranced out the door, closing the lecture hall door sharply behind her without one look back. 

“Nice girl,” Rossi acknowledged. “But it would be nicer if she could be on time.” 

I laughed, despite not finding (y/n) to be at the butt of the joke to be funny at all. 

“Um, are you actually gonna put in a good word for her?” I followed Rossi with my eyes, searching his face with a desperate hope that my question didn’t reveal too much. 

“Yeah, why not? I figured you would’ve liked to have another student audit your class.” 

“Yeah yeah…” I murmured in false agreement. 

Herein lies the trouble.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

PART 4 COMING SOON!

comment to be added to the taglist!

taglist: 

@andiebeaword​ @rexorangecouny​ @rip2myyouthjpg​ 

[futurewriter2000]

More than Family - pt. 3

A/N: It was such a long time since I had written a fic but I am so glad I did because wow. This was so fun to write and I hope you like it. Also I messed with the timeline a bit, so fuck it. I can write whatever I want. Woo, let’s go.

XX

Sirius was pacing in front of you, rubbing his chin and running his hands through his dense hair. He stopped, clasped his hands together and pressed his fingers on his chin. He stared at you, then zoomed out into his thoughts and then back at you. 

“I-” he started but the racket out on the hall caused his attention to avert from you. He looked at his watch and cursed under his breath. “Shit! They’re early.” he ran to the hall than back at you, grabbed you under his arm and poofed you away. 

You felt sick to your stomach as you had appeared in an unfamiliar room, bending over as anxiety came over you.

“Sorry, kid. They can’t know you’re here.” he led you to the bed and sat you down. “It’s an ugly side affect, you get used to it.”

“Ugh.” you let out a groan. “I don’t like magic.” you said as he let out a laugh. 

“It can be a bugger sometimes, yes.” he knelt down to you and looked at you a bit sadly. “I will be right back, kid. We’ll figure this out but for now, nobody can’t know about this.”

“COUSIN!” both of you heard a shout from the hallway. 

“Don’t cause any racket and just... wait... please...” he tilted his head. “For me.” he started to plead you with his eyes as you rolled your own. 

“Fine.”

----

Sirius did not trust you enough to leave the doors unlocked or to leave you without the silencing charm on your room but you were there, in his room, snooping. 

For the first few days you were kept in, you tried to avoid any kind of snooping, seeing as it was respectful to not touch his private things but it has gotten more dull as the day passed slowly and you had nothing to do than see him by the end of the day. 

He apparated in your room and found you lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. You didn’t jump, nor look at him but he knew you were furious at him. 

“I brought you a book.” he lifted the object in his hand and started walking towards you. 

You replied with silence. 

“I know this is an odd situation between you and me but we will talk, I pr-”

“Promise?” you finished instead of him. “Like you had promised four days ago?” you snapped, still not bothering to look at him. 

“It’s not easy, kid.” 

“I know it’s not easy.” you finally shot your head at him, glaring under your furrowed eyebrows. You jumped to your feet and started pacing. “You think you’re confused?! Imagine me being a kid and not knowing about half the things that happened in my childhood?! Imagine finding out that my mum is not my mum and my dad is not my dad and thinking that your dad was my dad because he was so fatherly-”

“That was not my father.” he snapped as well. He had no tolerance about his family. “My father was  cruel, evil and a pain in the arse.”

“He was the closest thing I had to a family.” your eyebrows started to tremble, as well as your lips. Sirius closed his mouth to argue. “He gave me the photo of you and James. He told me about my mother. He told me about you- everything about you! He said you were a good man! A fair man, honest, brave, daring and then I meet you and it’s like... like you’re nothing of that!! I’m here! Trapped like a prisoner and all I want is to talk!”

Sirius stood up and faced you his back. “No.” he mumbled under his breath, shutting his eyes with force and gritting his teeth. “You’re lying. That was not my father.” he growled. “He could never say any of those things you had just said.” 

“He spoke of you plenty.”

“How would you know? You said he only watched you from afar!”

“But he didn’t!” you shouted. “I knew there was more because I keep getting glimpses in my dreams about him and I playing chess and this boy- this boy that looks so much like you and he has such a nice smile- and...and... I have memories of him too! I just wish I could remember them because all I get is glimpses and as soon as they come they disappear! That’s why I need you!”

“Reg...” he mumbled under his breath, finally turning back to you and watching you with sorrowful, regretful eyes. “He-”

“Where in the  bloody hell are you cousin!” the two of you heard a shout from the hallway, both glancing at the door.

“No.” you said as you saw him apologise with his eyes. “No, you can’t just leave-” you started to run to him but he was already gone. “UGH!” you screamed and ran to his bed, screaming into the pillow. 

You were trying to remember the man from your dreams, the boy. You tried to focus on him, find out more about him but nothing came to light. 

But then you remembered. You were in his room. His room. 

You sat up and looked at his dark brown desk, which started to fall apart throughout the years. You walked to it, sitting on the creaking chairs and running your fingertips on the surface of the desk. You felt cuts, splinters that wanted to dig into your skin. At the very edge of the desk you saw initials- his initials. 

S. O. B. 

Except that the O and B were crossed over multiple times. You quickly averted your attention from there and looked at the wall in front of you. It was connected to the desk, with four small drawers on each side but in the middle it was an empty space, filled with polaroids, photos and writings. You saw quill and ink on the side, snorting a bit. “Who still uses a quill, old man?” you took the large feather in your hand and observed it. It was extremely light but what you did not know was what the feather hid. 

The Marauders - was what it was carved in wood, under the polaroid of three young boys. 

‘ Something pulled you away- something strong and powerful, letting you land on your 3rd grade classroom, listening about triangles. It was you and you were such a child back then. 

“(y/n)?” you heard your teacher call you from the door and you looked up. “Your uncle is here to pick you up.” she smiled and you could see yourself radiate with joy. 

And you couldn’t remember that day. You couldn’t remember anything about this specific memory that seemed to be hidden somewhere in your brain. 

Your little self ran out of the class with her backpack larger than her body and you saw the boy beaming at you. 

“Here’s my Princess!” he laughed as you ran into his arms and he lifted you up, spinning you around. You giggled joyfully as he placed you back down and took your backpack off your shoulders. “Let’s take this heavy thing off.” 

“Where are we going!? Where are we going?” you jumped over-excitedly. 

“It’s a surprise.” he winked at you, putting your backpack onto his shoulder and taking your small hand into his. “I asked the teacher about your progress. She said you had improved quite lovely.” he looked down on you.

“I listened to you. I did my homework every day after school and I didn’t leave the desk until I had finished it.”

“And you did it all by yourself?” 

“No. Dad had to help me with geography.” you started to get a bit upset and he seemed to notice it.

“Geography is a bugger sometimes.” he smiled. “There’s nothing wrong with getting some help. And mathmatics?”

“I’m top of my class.”

“That’s wonderful!” he laughed. “I’m proud of you.” 

“I just wish you’d come more often, Uncle.” you started to get upset again. “Granpa is fun and all but he keeps beating me at chess and-”

The man by your side let out a laugh. “Granpa was never keen on losing, kid. He did the same to me and my brother.” 

You stopped in your tracks and so did he. He had realised what he had said and shut his eyes regretfully. “You mean my real dad?” you looked up at him, looking up at him with watery eyes. 

The man knelt down to you and cupped your chin. 

“Why isn’t he here?”

“He- uhm.” he stopped, trying to find the right words. “He’s busy.”

“I want to meet him. I want to know who he is.” 

“No, you don’t kid. He’s extremely busy.” he started to get a bit frustrated and bitter. 

“Busy with what?”

“With Marauders.” he rolled his eyes and gritted his teeth in anger. “With him and Marauders- as they call themselves- they come before family.” he continued to speak bitterly and saw how awfully that affected you, so he fixed his thin-lipped smile into a beam and cupped your cheeks. “But we don’t do this here. Me and granpa won’t do this to you. Family comes first, (y/n). We’re not like your father. We choose family.” he kissed your forehead and pulled you into a hug. ‘ 

You woke up from the memory, emotionally exhausted. You felt relieved and calm but so sad. You had no clue who the man was but how he made you feel was as close to family as you could get. 

You pushed yourself from the chair and started to dig around the drawers. 

Whoever this man was, he was right. Sirius didn’t care about family, he showed you that perfectly clear just about now, when he kept you in this room for four days and not telling you a single thing. He didn’t want to let you go but he didn’t want to tell you what is going on either. The fact is, you didn’t care about him anymore. You wanted to know more about your uncle. You wanted to know about his brother because he was there, you just can’t remember. 

There must be a reason he stopped visiting you- your uncle but you had to find him. You need to know but you couldn’t find a single thing about him except a photo of him and Sirius, somewhere far in the drawer. No name, no information. 

You ran to the bed and started to look for anything that could tell you something about him. You dropped on your knees and looked under the bed.

Nothing. 

“Ugh!” you let out a desperate groan and slammed your face on the rug. 

He forgot to lock the door.- you heard something in your ear and you quickly turned around to see who it was. 

There was nobody but you and the voice. You looked around and around with your heart thriving on adrenalin. 

Follow me. - it said from the door.

“Probably a bad idea.” you told yourself, staring at the door with wide eyes. “But at least it’s some idea.” you stood up and continued to stare at it. 

Trust me. - it continued and it was as if somebody took a hold of your hand, something so familiar and safe that brought the man back into your head; his piercing eyes and his wonderful smile.

And you could. You could walk to the door without feeling afraid anymore... with feeling him by your side. 

You put your hand on the handle and prayed to whoever was with you that the door was unlocked. With a twist you found out that Sirius left the door unlocked. 

You peeked on the hallway, hearing voices from a room far away. You looked both ways and before you could decide, something inside of you said right and so you did. 

You tiptoed down the hall and just stopped. 

Here. Look to your right. - it said and so you did. 

You put your hand on the door handle but it didn’t budge. “It’s locked.”

Try again.

“Why would I try again if it’s-” the door just opened and you felt a shiver run down your spine. “Oh... yeah no. I’m not doing this ghost thing. I watched way too many horror movies to know where this is going.” you started to back away but it was as if somebody caught you and whispered. 

“Don’t you want to know about me?”

You turned around with a snap and started back away, staring at the empty space where that voice came from and before you had realised it, you were in the room.

It was similar to Sirius’. The bed, the desk, the cupboards, wardrobes, window... everything was placed on the same location as Sirius’ room. The only difference was that everything was covered in white sheets. 

You looked at the empty hallway then back at the room. “Fuck it.” you mumbled and closed the door in case somebody passes by. You did it as quietly as you could but even you couldn’t avoid the smallest creaks the old wood had caused. 

You pulled the sheets off everything. His bed, his desk, his wardrobe- everything. You even opened the window to get some light in the room before you decided to search through it. His name wasn’t hard to find in his own room. 

Regulus Arcturus Black. 

‘ “This is her?” he said as he walked behind your grandfather. His eyes were still, observing every inch of you. 

“This is her.” your grandfather smiled as he moved another piece of chess down the board. “(y/n).” he looked at you as you looked at him. “This is your uncle, my son, Regulus Arcturus Black.” he moved another piece as you looked up at the man. “He’s going to take care of you when I’m gone.” ‘

The memory left as soon as it came and a tear had fallen down your cheek. 

“Regulus.” you smiled to yourself and started to look through his things. 

His room was much more neater and organised than Sirius’. Everything was much more well kept, which you could see on his desk that had no scratch, nor carvings in it. It was smooth and tidy, much more darker than Sirius’. 

You started to open the drawers but there was nothing there except some letters, school papers and books. Until something in your gut feeling told you to turn around and walk to his night stand. 

Without a doubt you did so. Running to it and opening the smallest of the drawers. There was a box, quite larger than the drawer and for a moment there it confused you because how could a drawer so small hold a box this big. 

You opened it and found many letters, many photos of you as a child. 

You sat down on the bed and started going through it. 

‘Dear Uncle, 

I had finally finished it. I hope you come home soon! I can’t wait to see you again!

(y/n) ‘

You read with a photo of you holding your elementary school certificate. You looked at the date and saw that that was only 3 years ago. 

“I’ve known you three years ago.” you told yourself. “Where are you?” you dug through it, trying to find any evidence of him. 

You found another photo instead, a moving one. You were 16 years old- that was a year ago- when the two of you were filming him eating ice cream and when you appeared on the photo frame. 

You felt shocked to the bone. 

‘ “Hey, Reg!” you laughed, holding camera in your hand. “Say cheese!” 

“Cheese!” he smiled brightly. “Let me see!” he said as soon as he heard the camera click. “Why on Earth hadn’t you told me I have ice cream on my face?” 

“Now where would the fun be in that, Uncle?” you smiled.

“Have some respect for the elderly!” he gasped over-dramatically.

“What are you? 60?” 

“Oh, dear God no.” he laughed, wrapping his arm around you and walking along side you. 

“Though I see some grey hair making appearance.” 

“Oi, kid. Don’t make me throw you in the water.” 

“I’d like to see you try.”

“Are we going to have to duel?”

“You did learn me a few tricks, haven’t you?” you smiled, showing him a glimpse of your wand from the hem of your pants. “When pupil outteaches the master.”

“Dream on, kid.” ‘

You opened your eyes wide. “I knew magic.” you blurted out. “He thought me magic!” 

[pastry-porn]

Anyone want to by my free therapist??

Too bad I'm already ranting

I think I got trauma from the dumbest thing, I was on my phone during passing period between classes, I just had 3 separate breakdowns and several panic attacks bc I was having a bad day and had alot of stress built up, so I was using my phone to calm myself down as I didn't have any other way to do so at the moment. My teacher (the special Ed teacher) came in and immediately raised her voice at me saying "we're going to have a problem. Get off your phone!" At that moment all I heard was someone raising their voice so it took me a couple seconds to register what she had said (I'm a little slow) before I even had the chance to understand her words she huffed and ran to get the vice principal. Once I got the gist of what she said I put my phone down when she came busting in with the vice principal telling him about how disrespectful I am and it's her classroom her rules. I admit I was a little upset by her overreaction and argued with her a bit. She still has her voice raised and at this time (still carrying the stress mentioned before) I started getting overwhelmed and hyperventilating, crying, the whole 9 yards. Basically having a meltdown. Despite my reaction to the situation she continued to rant at / about me, threatening me about how she was going to take my phone away. (I have a 504 stating that my phone is a comfort item and cannot be taken off me.) I then huddled into a ball to protect my phone so she couldn't get to it and covered my ears as it was not helping me whilst feeling overwhelmed. She continued to loudly talk about me to the vice principal (being quite rude I must say) when eventually she stoped and sent him on his way, she said "when you get over yourself, we need to talk." I felt very threatened and ran out of the classroom without even taking my things, I know it's irrational now but at the time I had convinced myself that she would physically restrain me if I took the time to gather my things. I sat outside the classroom and continued to cry, overhearing her argue with the other student in the class, the other student told her that she was in the wrong bad that I was definitely overwhelmed and should have been left alone for a few minutes to calm down but the teacher argued that I was "just throwing a hissy fit." After 30 minutes of my just trying to calm down I heard her get called by the vice principal, he was checking in on me and she had told him that I had run away and that she was looking for me (she hadn't even left her chair) "she was very worried about me." The vice principal then called me to request I go back to class, at this point I still was unable to calm myself down and just ran home, leaving my things behind ( I felt like a lizard leaving my tail to distract the predator.) I had my sister pick up my items after school.

The next day I went back to school and when it came time for that teachers class I went to the office to explain that I did not feel safe in that class or with that teacher and that I would be spending the period in the library, the principal told me that they needed to know where I was at all times and that i had to go to that teachers class so I once again went home. My mother and I where then called in for a meeting. I seated myself as far away from that teacher as possible and ignored her during the begining of the meeting, at least until she began blatantly lying about the events of that day. She told my mother and the principal that she had softly asked me to put my phone away and that I argued with her, and that was why she brought in the vice principal, she then told everyone that she had left me alone when I started melting down and that she was searching franticly for me when I ran off. She told me that she had helped "cure" kids with anxiety before and I just had to get over my panic attacks, breakdowns and night terrors to work with her. She acted entitled to an apology for how I acted and that I should just get over it.

This whole event happened a week ago and I am getting moved to online school while I skip in person, I have had many panic attacks just thinking about meeting her, breakdowns when I'm told I should go to school in the meantime and have been experiencing night terrors (Wich is new)

[joyrose-fandomer]

Music club AU Chap4 (Sanders sides Human AU)

TL;DR: Remember when the twins mom hoped that Virgil was emotionaly strong ? He’s not. But at least he have an ally now !

POV : Virgil

Relationship: Creativitwins, Prinxiety, Logicality parent to Virgil, Dukceit

TW: Little panic attaque, thaughts of getting hurt or bullied, avoiding somone (You know, the Virgil set, but really it’s ok)

<<Previous

Virgil wished a meteor fell from the sky and flattened him like a pancake.

This was the only thought he had when he saw the twins arguing about god-know-what at the school's entrance the next day.

He immediately stopped and looked for any possible way of reaching his classroom without getting through them.

So he followed the gate all around the school until he reached the back entrance which was, of course, closed. The anxious high school boy checked around to be sure he was alone before taking a few steps back. 

He then ran to the gate and with momentum, he managed to climb and jump to the other side.

"Wow."

Virgil felt himself jump out of his skin. A boy looking a year older than him was starring at him in amazement. He was wearing a bright yellow scarf, had heterochromia brown/yellow, and was wearing a f-ing fedora. HOW did Virgil not notice him? Where was he hiding?

"Did you forget your passe?"

The boy visibly forced a smirk through shock.

He didn't forget his passe but Virgil didn't feel like explaining the situation and nodded.

Something unreadable when through the eyes of fedora boy whose smirk widen.

"You know there's a camera here?"

Virgil, when pale and slowly turned around to look at where the boy was pointing, no doubt, this was a camera.

Oh no, he was in big trouble. He was going to be called by the director. He was going to have detention. They will call his dads and they will be so disappointed in him and-

"Hey, calm down, I was just joking. The camera doesn't work."

Virgil's breathing was very fast and the other teen was looking at him worryingly.

He looked at the older boy with eyes that that meant 'tell me it's true, and you're not messing with me again. I beg of you.'

Apparently, he got the message because he apologized and insisted he was telling the truth. He then sank to Virgil's level and took a long breath to silently prompt Virgil into doing the same thing.

Once the anxious teens breathing evened fedora boy stood back up.

"Want me to accompany you to class? My class is still in an hour but I'm guessing your's is starting soon?"

Virgil nodded and they walked together to his classroom.

He was still on edge but whenever his breathing started to pick up a hand fell on his shoulder to ground him. It reminded him of the way his father calm him when he felt bad and it was comforting.

Until a familiar voice yelled from behind.

"JAY!"

There was a flash of green in the corner of his vision and in the next second fedora-boy got tackle-hug by a very excited Remus in a green dress, both of them almost falling to the ground.

A gasp came up from behind Virgil.

"Emo Knightmare!"

Roman shouted, bouncing around like he just saw Santa Claus. Remus immediately picked up on it dragged Virgil into the hug.

"We waited 2 hours for you to get past the gate emo boy how did you even get in? No, both of you! I didn't see you either J!" Remus complained to the older boy.

Instead of answering, Jay smiled and kissed Remus's forehead, living the chaotic twin to mumble happily against his chest.

He then looked at Virgil, understanding clear in his eyes, and winked at him.

"Aren't you three late to class?"

"Do we have to?"

Remus complained and reluctantly let go of J getting a chuckle and a kiss on the top of his head in exchange.

"Yes, you have to. Now get to class both of you. I will accompany your friend to his own class"

Remus grumbles and dragged his brother to their classroom, who was complaining that he couldn't talk to Virgil and digging his heels in the ground ineffectively.

Once there were gone a hand fell back on his shoulder.

"They're a handful at first but they will grow on you eventually, you'll see."

With one last squeeze on his shoulder, Jay walked toward Virgil's classroom, forcing Virgil to run to catch up.

Once they were there J knocked at the door, the teacher was already there and looked at the second year confusingly.

"One of your students got lost so I brought him."

He lied casually, pointing at the worried teen behind him. When the teacher allowed Virgil to come in J whispered to him.

"Meet me behind the school at the first break"

And then he was gone.

The classes when too fast for Virgil and he has no idea what half of what the teachers said were. His brain was rolling a 100 km/h and he still had no idea what Jay wanted from him, or Roman and Remus for that matter and he was freaking out.

What if they were actually bullies and he was going to get bit up. A voice in the back of his head sounding suspicious like his father told him that it didn't make any sense and he needed to calm down.

But he couldn't, they were all so random and nothing during the last three days made any sense to him. Why were they even talking to him in the first place!

The bell ran his imminent doom. He couldn't escape it, who knows what they could do.

When he reached the other side of the school Jay was waiting for him. He waved at Virgil with a smile and asked him to follow him. They snicked past a half-closed door held close by a single rusty chain. Into an abandoned room that was probably the old PE reserve. It was arranged to be more comfortable, with old blankets added to the gymnastic mattresses and few candles here and there to have some light.

"Sit wherever you want." The older boy prompted so Virgil sat obediently on the closest mattress.

"I'm used to going to this room when I'm overwhelmed. I'm the only one who knows or at least remembers it's here so no one ever bothers me. Don't tell Roman and Remus about it, I like them but they can be a little much sometimes."

He sunk on the opposite side of the mattress.

"I guess you know about it too now"

Virgil was confused about why he was telling him that. Was it a threat or something?

"You're wondering why I brought you right?" Virgil nodded 

"To talk to you about the twins. 

They tend to do everything too big. They are constantly moving and loud. like, two big toddlers. They are doing a new challenge every day, they basically never stop. 

It's a wonder where they find all this energy."

He laughed lightly at the taught, fiddling with his gloves. He had gloves?

"I'm telling you that because you don't seem like the type to deal well with those. And it's pretty obvious that they had taken a liking to you, they probably already made a challenge out of who befriends you first. 

So you're basically stuck now."

Vigil swallows down the lump growing in his throat.

  "Yeah." Jay acknowledged Virgil's worry and continued. "Getting the attention of only one twin is manageable but with both, you're definitely gonna need a hand."

He smiled at the anxious boy next to him in a comforting gesture but wasn't very effective.

He sighed and sat closer the put his hand on Virgil's shoulder for the third time today.

"It's not so bad once you get used to their hyperactivity. They're the most loyal and sweet guys I got to see in a long time. The first weeks are just going to be, long."

Virgil was still confused about where he was trying to go. Was he trying to comfort him? Because it wasn't working.

"So I'll give you some advice. First of all, stop with the silent treatment. It only gets them more curious. Trust me, I tried."

Virgil sends him a panicked look. He couldn't just start talking with random people just like that, especially not people like the twins. Speaking sucks, what if he stuttered? What if he said something wrong?

He got a squeeze on the shoulder silently asking him to get back on earth.

  "Want to try talking with me first?"

Jay asked.

Virgil thought about it for a moment before nodding.

"Good, let's start simple. What's your name?"

The anxious teen took a deep breath.

"... V-"

His voice lost itself in his throat at the last second.

"It's ok, try again."

Jay prompted

"V-Virgil"

Fedora boy smiled proudly.

"That's a good name. I'm Janus"

The bell rang. Janus stood up, helping Virgil up in the process.

"In what class, are you?"

"...207"

"I'm in 209, want to go together?"

Virgil nodded. Janus frownd.

"Out loud please."

"Y-yes"

The older student smiled and walked out of the room.

"Know that this room is now also yours. If you're ever overwhelmed just come here. But it stays between us ok?"

  "ok."

"And, Virgil? Just so you know. The twins are definitely going to abduct you for lunch. So brace yourself"

Fedora boy smirked wickedly, making his yellow eye shining in amusement.

Oh, no.

***<>===========<>***

Hey, sorry for the wait I sayed it would come soon and it had been 2? 3? month. Sorry. I hope having some snake boy will compensate. (^-^’)

Tag list:

@falsemood

@extraintrovertedalien

[chibinekochan]

Angel in Hell - Part 4

Obey me! Angel Reader Au.

Gen. reader insert.

Read the other parts first. part 1 | part 2 | Part 3 |

~4k words

Taglist:

@gothjuulpod  ; @purgatoryhall ; 

*message me if you want to be on here*

_______________

"Hey there, umm are you ready to go?" Mammon doesn't seem to have any school supplies with him but you don't want to be rude.

"Sure, lead the way." You smile at him. 

Together you head to class. You are glad that someone brings you.

  Then Mammon stops in front of a classroom. "This is it. This is Belphie. I bet Lucifer dragged him here himself." Mammon laughs, pointing at the sleeping Belphie. 

"Alright, thank you for bringing me Mammon." You bow to him. 

"Don't sweat it. I will bring you back but I've got work to do. Too damn bad." Mammon sighs. 

"What kind of work are you doing?" You are kind of curious. 

"Why are you...? Oh right… I'm a model. I should bring a magazine to you later then I can show you how cool I am." Mammon laughs, seemingly pumped up. 

"I would like to see that." You smile, happy to have discovered something interesting. 

"Alright then, I will be off now. Hey Belphie, wake up and explain the classes." Mammon shouts in Belphie. 

Who growans in response.

"It's so annoying, keep it down. I'm sleeping here." Belphie doesn't move. He isn't fazed at all. 

"Don't forget what Lucifer told you. You better not mess this up, Belphie. I will see you later." Mammon sighs and smiles at you. 

"Sure, see you later." You look after him running off. 

"Ah well, come here. Sit next to me. Lucky for you Beel has a game today." Belphie waves you over, with minimal movement. 

"Alright. Beel is your twin right?" You remember what Simeon told you. 

"Yeah, he is. Usually, he sits next to me. You would… I mean you can sit over there starting tomorrow." Belphie points to the seat at the next table over, the seat next right next to Beels. 

"I see that's nice of you." You give him a light smile. 

"Sure…you should also take notes for me. I just can't stay awake all day in class you know." Belphie shoves his book over to you.

You sit down next to him.

  "You should do your own work but since I borrowed the books from you today I will help you out." You think he is being a bit unfair but you can't complain too much. 

"You're always a good person aren't you? No surprise that you became an angel." Belphie sighs, sounding strangely angry. 

You feel kinda hurt by his comment. 

"Only good people become angels but just for your information it's incredibly rude to tell angels that they were human before." 

"Did I hit a sore spot there? I guess that's something they would teach. That humans are something to be ashamed of? Pretty ironic, seeing as some of their best were human before." Belphie seems just as hurt as you are. 

"Do you know a human like that?" You find it a bit difficult to believe. 

"I don't know what crap they teach you in holy university but yes I knew a great human. Someone truly deserving to become an angel but to be honest they should've become a demon instead." Belphie seems so hurt. It stings you. 

You aren't sure what to say to him." I'm sorry Belphie…" You know what you just said was rude and honestly, you don't want to see him hurt. 

"I know you didn't mean anything by it. It's not your fault that you got your head full of this angel bs." Belphie sighs.

"You've been an angel but yet you say such bad things about them." You shake your head. 

"I don't fault you for this but I know how screwed up they are from personal experience." Belphie seems to be having a hard time meeting your eyes. 

You aren't sure what to say about this. You have been told about how they started a war and then were banned from the heavens. It's probably a bad idea to go deeper into this.

"I guess we can't be on the same page on this issue." You feel a bit bad but it can't be helped. He is a demon in the end so it makes sense that you have some fundamental differences.

"If you knew their true face you would agree with me but you are right. Let's just talk about nicer things from now on." Belphie desperately wants to change the topic. It seems like he regrets even bringing it up. 

"That's alright with me." You nod to strengthen your agreement. 

"So what kind of pillows do you prefer? You know I personally prefer them soft and fluffy." Belphie seems to just change to the first topic that crosses his mind. 

"I like them soft and umm square-shaped?" You aren't sure what Belphie really expects you to say. 

"How do you feel about round pillows?" Belphie seems pleased enough with your answer. 

"They are good to rest my arm on but they aren't good for sleeping." You honestly have no clue where this conversation is going but at least it's pleasant.

  Then the teacher enters the room and you and Belphie quiet down. 

Lunch Break is approaching. Accompanied by your stomach noises. 

This apparently woke Belphie up again. After you tried and failed to quietly keep him awake the entire class.

  "Is it time to eat?" Belphie asks you, in a sleepy tone. 

"Yeah." You nod and feel slightly embarrassed about your stomach. 

"Great, I'm getting hungry just by sitting next to you." Belphie chuckles. 

You flush pink. "You heard it didn't you?" 

"Haha yeah, it's kinda hard to overhear." He smiles and stretches. "Come let's go! If we are lucky they still have your favorite." Belphie slowly stands up. 

"My favorite? How would you know that?" You tilt your head in confusion. 

"Oh, I meant I'm sure that you will love it. Sorry, still waking up." Belphie waves you off and yawns as if to prove his point.

"Hmm alright then." His statement confuses you but you let it slide.

  Together you head to the dining hall. 

Belphie chooses something and points the meal out that he is sure you will love. You are still kinda confused but take it anyway. 

Together you walk to a table. You spot Satan and Levi already sitting there and eating, without saying a word.

  "Hey, you two." You greet them and sit down. Across from Satan, right between Levi and Belphie. 

"Hey, how is your first day of school going so far?" Satan asks. 

"Pretty good so far." You have no real complaints. 

"If you need someone to tutor you. Please don't hesitate to ask me." Satan offers you in a friendly manner. 

"That's very nice of you Satan." You smile at him. 

"You have become such a suck-up." Belphie sighs. 

"Shut up. Nobody cares what you have to add, just being nice." Satan glares at Belphie.

  You feel like the atmosphere just got ten degrees colder. 

"Sure, whatever you say." Belphie glares back at Satan. 

"Please don't fight guys. Lucifer will only get mad and he is already on the edge." Levi meekly tries to calm them down. 

Both demons sigh and pick at their food. 

You feel sweat on your back and just start to eat. "This is really good." It's pretty surprising.

  "Well duh, it's your favorite after all." Levi giggles. 

You look confused at him. He is the 2nd one to mention that. 

"Don't mind him, this meal is just popular among angels. Isn't that right Satan?" Belphie shoots daggers at Satan. 

"Yeah, that's right." Satan glares back. 

"Ah yeah… t-that's right…s-sorry I'm being dumb again d-d-don't mind me, nothing to see here." Levi wildly flails his arms around. 

"I see, but you guys really say some strange stuff sometimes." You can't help but feel a bit suspicious. 

"That's because we are bad demons and if you don't watch out we are going to gobble you right up." Belphie is obviously being sarcastic, at least you hope he is. 

"Don't be weird, Belphie. We would never eat you! " Satan is very stern when he says that.

"Yeah, that would just be wrong. You just got ba - I mean you only arrived. It's not like you have ever been here…" Levi starts to stumble over his own words again. Only to get interrupted by Satan and Belphie. 

"SHUT UP LEVI!" Both of them yell at the same time.

  Levi immediately pipes up. At least the two have something they agree on? 

"It would be very bad if you would eat me." You aren't sure what else to add. 

"Well in that case just stay away from me." Belphie seems awfully cold to you.

  Maybe he hates angels after all? 

It hurts quite a bit. 

Satan shakes his head and Levi keeps on picking at his food until he suddenly stands up and runs off. 

You are confused about why he just ran off and look confused at Satan. "Don't mind Levi, he is antisocial." Satan then focuses back on his own meal. 

The rest of the lunch is rather awkward.

  You just finish your meal and then trot back to class.

  There you are surprised to find Beel. “Ah Beel, is your game already over?”

“Yeah, the other team just went home crying. I was being nice but then I got hungry and just made a good 1000 points. So they ran away.” Beel shrugs as if this was nothing.

“Wow, that's very impressive.” You can't imagine it to be honest.

“Haha, it was nothing really.” Beel is sheepishly laughing.

“Well, now where Beel is back you can share books with him,” Belphie states coldly and sits down.

“I don't mind but did something happen between you two?” Beel seems confused.

“Nothing happened. I just don't want them closer than they have to be.” Belphie speaks curtly and barely even looks at you.

“Belphie don't be mean. They have done nothing to deserve this.” Beel sighs, his expression is complicated.

“I don't mind sitting over here instead.” You don't want the situation to get even worse. You quietly get to your place right next to Beel.

“We will talk later about this Belphie but don't be mean.” Beel sounds very serious.

  It's nice that Beel stands up for you, even when you don't fully understand Belphies’ issue. You only know that it really hurts.

Belphie sighs and lays on his desk, ending the discussion.

  Beel shakes his head. “I apologize ... he has been through a lot. He doesn't mean it. Just give him some time. We all just need to get used to this.” Beel breathes heavily but his apology seems genuine.

“It's alright. I'm an angel it must be very strange for you all to live with me and then the room I'm staying in...it's also somehow hard for you...We all get used to this eventually. At least I hope we will.” You aren't sure what to say or what to feel right now. You certainly will try at least.

“It's just that you...it's not because of the room or that you are an angel...it's just you know hard…” Beel has a grim expression on his face. 

“I don't understand but I will do my best I promise.” You are sure that you can solve this somehow.

“And that is exactly how we even ended up in this situation…” Belphie grumbles.

“Belphie!” Beel glares at Belphie. 

Belphie just looks away and places his head on his arms, hiding his face on his desk.

“Please don't mind him, just give him some space.” Beels face twists, he must hide a lot of pain.

“It's alright we have a lot of time ahead of us to get to know each other better.” You give Beel a light smile. There are no bridges that are built in one day.

  Beel nods a little and the class starts again.

Whatever happened surely created a big impact on all of them.

You try not to mind it and move forward but it still weighs on your heart and mind.

  You try to just focus on the classes for the rest of the day and then quietly head home with the twins.

  Somehow today's events still pester your mind so you decide to pay Simeon and Luke a visit.

You give them a quick heads up, luckily they are free.

  Simeon picks you up at the entrance of their dorm. The damage that has been taken is still very visible. You wonder what made Satan this angry? 

“Welcome, let's go to our room. So we can talk in private. Luke made sweets. He is very excited to see you. Even when it's only been a day.” Simeon giggles.

You smile, imagining the excited Luke running around, making sweets. “Thank you, Simeon. I hope that I don't bug you.”

“Nonsense. You are always welcome. Our room might as well be your room.” Simeon smiles gently.

“You are always being so nice to me Simeon. I wonder how I deserve such an honor.” You never found a reason for his niceness. He is truly an angel in every sense of the word.

“Don't think about it too much. Just know that you certainly deserve it and don't forget that you are basically my cute little student.” He giggles lightly.

You remember how much he taught you and nod. “I just hope that I can live up to such high praise.” 

“There is no need for that, keep being you and here we are.” Simeon stops in front of a room. 

You can see two names on the door. Luke and Simeon.

  Simeon opens the door. You can tell that they already decorated it to their liking. Then you see Luke, who is practically beaming at you. You smile kindly at him.

“Come on in.” Luke welcomes you with a big smile and you step inside.

  Simeon closes the door behind you and joins you and Luke on the table. It seems that they have already prepared for you since the table is filled with sweet treats and you can see a pot of tea.

The sight alone makes you smile.

You get served a cup of tea and have a sip of it. It fills you with pleasant warmth.

  "This is so good. Is this tea from the Demon Realm?" You've never tasted anything like it before. 

"That is right. Barbatos taught me how to make it." Luke is rightfully proud. 

"It's great you're getting along with demons. I'm a bit envious." You smile and cast your eyes into your cup. Giving a small sigh. 

"I don't get along with all of the demons!" Luke seems slightly offended. 

Simeon gives him a slightly delighted giggle. 

"Just take it as a compliment Luke, and you'll surely be able to connect with the brothers soon enough. This isn't a race, just get to know them and find common ground." Simeon provides you with his advice, in his usual kind manner. 

"I know. I don't plan to let this get me down but today I kinda butt heads with one of them and now I wonder what I can do to fix this." Making another small sigh, recalling Belphies' cold remarks. 

"Did you have an argument with one of them? Who was it?" Simeon seems mildly surprised. 

"It was Belphie. It was mainly my fault. I think I said some hurtful things." You still feel guilty about it. 

"You can only make an honest apology and hope that you two can make up. You should reflect on what exactly hurt him or made him lash out. I don't think that everything is lost between you two. I'm sure you can move past this with some effort." Simeon smiles kindly. 

His words give you much to think about. 

"You are right. Thank you, Simeon. I will think about this. I surely will find an opportunity to have a proper conversation with Belphie." You won't give up that much, that's for sure. 

"Don't feel bad! I'm sure it was Belphies’ fault anyway." Luke tries to cheer you up.

"I know you mean well but I was definitely insensitive." You give Luke a sad smile. 

"It's alright. Don't beat yourself up. I just want to apologize and try to move on. We all make mistakes." Simeon pats your shoulder, as a sign of support. 

You nod. "You are right. I will apologize to him after dinner. He is bound to show up for that." You motivate yourself. 

"That sounds like a great plan. Let me know how it goes." Simeon smiles in an encouraging way. 

"I'm sure it will work out just fine but now let's have some cake." Luke smiles and you nod.

  The desserts really do look great and some sugar sounds great right now. 

You indulge in a few sweet treats, under the eyes of the beaming Luke and the smiling Simeon. 

It's a very enjoyable time.

  You return to your room and finish your homework and read a little bit before dinner time. 

Sadly, Belphie is nowhere to be found at dinner time. It's pretty disappointing. 

You decide to talk to Beel instead. 

"Do you know where Belphie is?" 

"He is asleep in our room. I think he feels kinda bad today." Beel replies in a friendly manner. 

"Oh, I see. Is it because of me?" You feel a pang of guilt. 

"Oh no, I don't think it's because of you… It's just been a lot for him." Beel doesn't meet your eyes. 

You wonder if he is lying or just trying to protect everyone's feelings. 

"I see… do you think that there is anything I can do for him?" You don't want to push too much but still show that you care. 

"You are very nice but I think that he just needs space. I think he is feeling guilty too." Beel looks at you like he is begging you to understand. 

"Okay, I'll gladly give him space… Could you just tell him to get better from me?" You understand that Belphie needs time to get used to you being here but you want to make sure that Belphie knows that you aren't mad at him or anything. 

"Sure, I will let him know and just talk to him tomorrow. Until then he will be better again." Beel smiles and nods.

"Thank you, Beel. Oh, I have some treats from Luke can you give one to Belphie? You can have the rest." You hand Beel a small bag with a few treats. 

Maybe these will help to smooth things over? 

Beel beams at the sweets. "It will be hard but… I will give Belphie at least one." Beel looks like he is already struggling to hold back. 

"I appreciate it, Beel." You smile at him.

  Then you head to the library, for some studying. 

There is so much you still have to learn. Especially now with your new school books. 

You arrive in the library and find Satan sitting there, with a stack of books in front of him. 

Since you don't want to bother him you quietly head over to the shelves. 

"Good evening. Do you need anything specific? I have most of the layout here memorized." Satan looks up and has a small smile on his face. 

"Good evening Satan. Sorry I didn't mean to bother you. I just want to read up on some of the demon history and maybe some other things. I read the ones we have in heaven of course but I want to read them from the demons point of view as well." You politely smile. 

Satan lays his book on the table and gets up." Give me a moment." He heads over to some shelves. 

You watch him a bit stunned, as Satan quickly scans the shelves and then takes a thick book off the shelf. 

"This should be the best book to start. It's a comprehensive guide to the history of the Devildom. It's very helpful to gain a good understanding of the basics." Satan proceeds to carry the heavy book to the table. 

"That is very nice of you Satan." You smile kindly at him. It's a bit unexpected for you that he would go out of his way for you. Especially since he was so strange earlier. 

"Just see it as my way of apologizing. I know lunch was a bit awkward. I mean it was mainly my brother's fault but I know that I wasn't too nice either." Satan seems to be very troubled somehow. 

"In that case, I gladly accept the apology, but I think it was my fault that Belphie was in a bad mood. I hurt him more than I initially thought." You sigh. You really need to be more careful with your words. 

"Don't let that bother you. He is always like this. He will eventually get back to being normal. Belphie is just a bit prickly sometimes." Satan doesn't seem to be concerned at all. 

"I still want to apologize to him when I see him again." You can't help yourself, it's just your nature. 

“You have such a kind heart you need to be more careful or you will get badly hurt.” Satan looks a bit troubled. 

You can tell that he is sincere. “I will keep that in mind Satan.”

“No matter how it might look, we all want you to feel at home here. There are just some circumstances that make it rather difficult.” Satan shows a rare somber expression. 

“I wonder if you will ever tell me about those circumstances.” You give Satan a sad look.

“Trust me I would if I could.” He smiles slightly and you want to believe him.

You aren't sure what he can't tell you but it obviously weighs on him, on all of the brothers.

  Somehow you want to make them feel better. It's so strange that you feel this way since you have just met them all. 

You get to read your heavy book and Satan goes back to his own reading.

  It's quite pleasant. 

Sometime later your reading gets interrupted.

  "I'm sorry to interrupt but I'd like to talk to you for a little bit." It's Lucifer. He speaks in a calm manner. 

"Sure, let me just put this book back." You don't have any clue what he wants from you but of course, you do as told. 

"I can do that for you. It's very heavy." Satan doesn't acknowledge Lucifer. 

"That's nice but don't worry I got this. I'm stronger than I look." You don't have many issues lifting the book. 

"Ah yes… you are stronger than a human." Satan turns grim for a moment. 

You don't know why he said this. It's a bit confusing. You put the book back in its place. "Have a good night Satan." You give him a light smile.

"You too. Sleep well." Satan nods. 

You turn to Lucifer, who is still waiting at the door. 

He doesn't say a word to Satan. It's a pretty icy atmosphere.

  Lucifer leads you to his office. 

"Come sit down. I will make us something to drink. Coffee or tea?" Lucifer heads over to his desk. 

You never expected to be offered tea by the infamous Lucifer. 

He seems surprisingly casual. 

"Tea please." You look around his office. It looks just like you pictured it. You decide to sit down. 

Lucifer follows after you, placing your cup in front of you. "It's devil black tea. I'm sure it will be to your liking."

You wonder why all these demons seem to know your preferences but you aren't one to argue. 

"Thank you, Lucifer." You take a small sip. It's really good. This is the 2nd time that they are right. A strange coincidence? 

"So, now to what I wanted to talk to you about. First of all, I hope that you find everything to your liking so far. I know it's quite a lot and my brothers are a handful but knowing that you are an angel I'm sure  you are doing just fine." Lucifer seems to be correcting himself right in the middle there. 

You wonder if he meant to say something else. 

"I don't have any complaints. I'm sure with giving time I will become friends with everyone." You give him a determined look. 

Lucifer gives you a small laugh. "That is pretty much what I expected to hear from you."

Then his face shifts. "I'm sure you have already noticed that my brothers acting strangely around you...the whole debacle with the room made this unnecessarily cruel to them." Lucifer sighs. "I will be blunt here in the room...it belonged to someone very important to me and my brothers. They are no longer with us… it's still a sore topic for them and us. You must forgive them for acting strange around you. I'm sure they will eventually get used to this." Lucifer speaks slowly, every word seems to hurt him. 

It's just as you suspected. "I'm so sorry…" You don't even know what to say. You feel a stabbing pain in your heart. 

"It's painful but I assure you that it's not really about you. Just know that I will do my best to make this as easy as possible for all of us. Including you." Lucifer seems to try to make you feel better. 

You appreciate his efforts. 

"Can I ask you a question about the owner of the room?" You have a suspicion about them. 

"Sure, go ahead." Lucifer's face seems to harden. 

"Were they human?" What Belphie said earlier echoes in your head. 

Lucifer takes a slightly relieved breath. "Yes, that is right. They started out as an exchange student but over time they became… an important part of our family." Lucifer has a smile on his face, it looks calm and painful. 

"Thank you for telling me." Some of the puzzle pieces fall into place for you. This explains Belphies’ reaction. You feel guilty. 

Lucifer looks into his cup. You wonder what he is thinking.

"I hope this answers your questions for now." Lucifer suddenly seems very tired. 

"Yes, I apologize for being insensitive." You probably shouldn't ask anything else. 

"You had the right to know. Now let's call this a night. It's getting late." Lucifer seems to be done with this topic. 

You can only nod. "You are right. I will head back to my room. Have a good night Lucifer." 

"Yes, sleep well." Lucifer has a shadow on his face but he still gives you a polite smile.

  You smile back and then head to your room. 

Thoughts swirl in your head until you pass out. 

[haikyuu-appreciation-club]

•Class Fight•

Terushima x F!Reader

warnings: language + violence

genre: fluff + a lil bit of angst

word count: 2.6k

———————————————————————

The sound of volleyball’s slamming against the floor echoed throughout the gym. The boys of Johzenji’s volleyball club were currently practicing for an upcoming game with Karasuno Highschool. None of them were particularly interested in practice but it was something to occupy their after school schedules so they attended none the less. Currently, half of the boys were on one side of the net practicing their spike. The other half were on the opposite side practicing receiving the spikes that were being sent over. Terushima stepped up to receive a spike when the door of the gym flew open. There in the doorway stood an out of breath Kazuma hunched over with his hands on his knees. An angry voice caused him to straighten up.

“ How many times have i told you about being late to practice you idiot!” Misaki spat while gripping her clipboard in frustration.

Despite the eyes boring into his sweaty figure, Kazuma spoke between breaths,

“Courtyard.......fight.......Y/N” he managed to get out before slouching against the wall.

Terushima’s eyes widened at the mention of his significant other’s name. He immediately dropped his form and sprinted out of the gym, yelling an apology to everyone while he was still within earshot. This wasn’t the first time you got into a fight. Although it didn’t happen particularly often, you didn’t mind getting physical with people when necessary. Terushima had known that, hell he practically knew everything about you by now. 

You and Terushima had met your first year of middle school. He had been carelessly running through the hallways with some of his friends. You on the other had had just left your classroom, irritated that you had to be held from lunch just to get a pointless scolding from your teacher. Both of you had not been paying attention to your surroundings while traveling down the narrow walkway and ended up colliding. You two ended in an awkward position to say the least. You were laying uncomfortably on the cold concrete while Terushima’s arms were on either side of you, holding himself up, with your legs intertwined. You looked up at the boy, cheeks dusted with red due to the little space between you two and a scowl which softened when he returned your gesture with an award winning grin,

“Hey you’re pretty cute! Probably even cuter with a smile though.” 

He lifted one of his hands while balancing himself on the other and poked the middle of your forehead. Normally you would’ve been pretty irritated with this gesture but you let out a laugh instead. You swatted his hand away as he laughed right along with you. You smirked,

“You aren’t too bad yourself.”

It was now his turn to blush. He pushed himself off of you and got to his feet. He held a hand out to you and you gratefully took it, allowing him to lift you up off the ground. You dusted off your skirt and thanked him. He just smiled and nodded. You were about to continue your walk to the cafeteria until you felt a tug at your wrist. You turned around and looked down to find Terushima gripping you're blazer. You looked up at him as he spoke,

“You wanna come eat lunch with me and my friends?”

 A smile spread across your face as you nodded eagerly. His eyes lit up as he began to pull you in the direction of the others. Before you reached the group of his friends he turned to you once again,

“By the way, the name’s Yūji Terushima!”

“Y/N L/N”

Terushima kept running until he reached the courtyard. There he found a large group of students bunched up in a circle. From the middle of the group he heard your projected voice mixed with another’s. He pushed through the crowd, mumbling what he meant to be words of politeness but it never actually reached anyone’s ears, since they were currently submerged in the scene unfolding in front of them. When he finally reached the middle, he understood the hold you had on their interest. You were currently on top of a girl, harshly pinning her wrists to the ground as you screamed in her face. Your face and body were dusted with bruises and you were sporting a bloody nose. The girl underneath you looked a little more on the unlucky side. She had a nasty black eye and cuts and bruises were scattered across her body. She had tears in her eyes and a scowl on her face as she shrunk back with each word you spit at her. Terushima sensed that if he let this go on any longer you were sure to get expelled or put this girl in the hospital. Weighing on the options, both seemed like pretty poor outcomes so he walked over to you and the girl. You didn’t notice the sudden presence behind you until you felt strong arms wrap around your torso. You tried hitting the unknown figure, angry that they were meddling in a situation that they weren’t involved in, that was until you heard a whisper in your ear,

“ Woah there princess, it’s just me alright”

You stop resisting once you recognized the familiar voice. You peered over your shoulder and met the brown eyes that you knew so well. His eyes scanned over your face and your figure, as if to analyze the damage that had been done. He smiled at you softly as he turned you to fully face him and brushed your messy hair behind your ear. Shoving his hand in his pocket, he dug around and pulled out a handkerchief. He pressed the fabric to your nose, grabbed your hand, and  put your hand in place of his, making sure to have you pinch the bridge of your nose to stop the bleeding.

“ Come on, lets go get you cleaned up.”

His soft smile turned into a playful grin as he intertwined his fingers with yours and pulled you in the direction of the nurse’s office. You could tell he was still worried but he tried to mask it with his usual child-like persona. Your mouth was pulled into a thin line, occasionally letting a soft giggle leave your lips at the jokes Terushima cracked. His attempts to lighten the mood and fight the silence that was slowly filling the atmosphere were somewhat working, but your mind was focused elsewhere. You were disappointed in yourself. You always got yourself into situations that your boyfriend had to save you from. It’s not as if you were some damsel in distress but you were just so stubborn that you always ended up getting yourself into things but never thinking of how you would get yourself out. You genuinely felt bad and wondered how long it would be until Terushima grew tired. Hell, he’s already had to deal with your shit for five years, how much more could he possibly handle.

 You were so immersed in your thoughts that you didn’t even realize you reached your destination until Terushima picked you up by your waist and plopped you down onto one of the beds in the nurses office. He looked around the empty room and sighed,

“I guess Dr. Yūji is at your service!”

he pointed both his thumbs at himself and gave you a grin. You returned his enthusiasm with a small smile as he went around the room in search for the supplies he would need to tend to your wounds. You watched as he pranced around the room, sifting through drawers and cabinets and gathering supplies in his arms. After a few minutes of snooping, Terushima walked back over to you and dropped the things he had gathered on the bed beside you. He grabbed a chair from behind him and flipped it so the back of the chair was closest to you. He sat facing you and rested his arms across the top of the chair. He sat back up and clapped his hands together,

“Alright then babe, let’s get to work.”

Terushima got up and sifted through the pile that was to your left. He grabbed a wash cloth from the pile and walked over to the sink on the other side of the room. He ran the cloth under the cool water and rung it out. Walking back over to you he sat down and scooted the chair closer to you so you were inches apart. He began lightly scrubbing away at the dirt and semi-dried blood on your face, humming a tune as he did. To be completely honest, Yūji noticed your difference in behavior right away and he knew it wasn’t due to your recent brawl. However, he knew you weren't one to spew your feeling so he decided to ease into getting information out of you. He continued to care for your wounds, cleaning off your body and bandaging anything that needed to be bandaged. Your bloody nose was long gone and he had gave you ice pack in place of the now soiled handkerchief.  You stayed quiet until he finished wrapping the last bandaid around your finger. He finished off by placing your face in between his hands and peppering it with small kisses, making sure to be careful of the sore areas. He leaned back, your face still in his hands, and you watched as his expression hardened a bit. 

“Okay, now that you’re good as new, what’s up with you?”

Your heart stopped for a moment. Of course he would notice. You would never guess but Teru was very observant when it came to the people he cared about. He had always been able to decipher your mood swings and rough patches in life, no matter how hard you tried to hide it. You shifted your gaze away from him and tried to get through this interrogation without letting down the front you put up.

“What are you talking about Yūji?”

“Well to start off, I had to pull you off that girl from class 3 earlier and you’ve been acting weird ever since. Don’t think I haven’t noticed Y/N, you’ve never been good at hiding this type of stuff.”

“First of all, that was supposed to be a calm confrontation. If that asshole wouldn’t have tried to punch me, we wouldn’t have had a problem.” you sighed, continuing with trying to soothing your boyfriends suspicions, “ I’m fine, really. I’m just irritated with what happened today.”

You looked up to meet Terushima’s gaze, hoping he bought that crap you just pulled out of your ass. Safe to say, based on his facial expressions, he saw right through your bullshit. He sighed and stood up from where he was sitting, placing the chair back in it’s original spot. He walked back over to the bed, pushed the supplies to the side, and sat beside you. Words began to meet your ears as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pulled you to lean into his chest. 

“Y/N, I really don’t want to push but I need to know what’s happening in that pretty little head of yours. We can’t get anywhere if we don’t talk to each other and you know that.”

You did know that, probably better than anyone. It was just so difficult to voice the worries that swarmed your head and your heart at the moment. You were nervous about the future. You had gotten so comfortable with the feeling of being with your lover that you genuinely could not imagine life without him. Losing him had been a fear you had ever since you got close to him. You were nervous about his reaction to your overwhelming thoughts which was the main thing keeping you from being honest and open with him. Despite all that, you knew Terushima deserved the truth even if it was difficult to tell him. So, you blurted out the first thing on your mind before you could back out, 

“Why haven’t you left me yet?”

Terushima’s eyes widened as his heart dropped. What the hell were you talking about? Did you want him to leave you? Why would he leave someone he’s in love with? His head swarmed with questions as he looked at you. Your eyes were currently glued to the floor as tears pooled at their brims. Teru finally broke the silence,

“Why would I leave you Y/N?”

You couldn’t stop the tears from streaming down your cheeks and in that moment, every single barrier you put up came crashing down. You could no longer hold your emotions in and you decided to finally let your boyfriend hear what you've been keeping to yourself all along,

“I put you through hell Yūji. You can’t possibly sit here and tell me I'm not a handful. I’m scared that one of these days you’re gonna get tired of my shit and I'll lose you.” you sucked in a shaky breath and finished what you wanted to get off your chest, “I’m sorry, I can’t say it enough. I have no idea how you managed to put up with my shit all these years but I shouldn’t have put you through that.” 

You hated feeling like you were giving him a damn sob story but your filter had been put on hold at the moment. You harshly wiped at the tears that were blurring your vision. Unbeknownst to you, Terushima had his own share of tears sliding down his face. He swiftly pulled you into his chest and wrapped his arms around you, kissing the top of your head before he let his own thoughts spill out,

“Y/N, I'm going to get really cheesy right now but I love you and nothing could possibly change that. Sure, sometimes you can be a pain in my ass but I know I'm equally one in yours. What fun would our relationship be if we were perfect all the time, ya know?” 

He pulled you away from his chest and cupped your face in his hands, using his  thumb to wipe away the remaining tears before they joined the others that had already stained your face. He gave you a toothy smile despite his own tears. You smiled right back at him and lifted your own hands to wipe his tears as well. 

He grasped the hand that was drying his face and pulled it behind him, causing you to gravitate in his direction. He used this opportunity to connect his lips with yours. The kiss was soft and sweet but it spoke so much louder than words ever could. You could feel the love filling your lungs and spreading throughout your body as your lips moved in sync. You pulled apart to catch your breath and his signature smirk painted his face,

“You’re not getting rid of me that easy Y/N, I'm in this for the long run baby.”

You let out a laugh and wrapped your arms around his neck pulling his close to you. He wrapped his arms tightly around your waist, returning the hug. It was quiet for a bit, just breathing in the scent of his cologne, until you felt his breath against your ear. He spoke in a hushed tone,

“I love you so much Y/N”

You smiled as your grip on him tightened slightly,

“I love you too Yūji”

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[terrifictrauma]

How can we let her die?

Shivering, I sat crunched over as the doctor gave me my epidural.  Nothing felt warm despite the warm blanket draped on my legs.  I had my headphones on, playing inspirational music.  I compiled the playlist for months, in the hopes it would help the situation.  I remember her saying, “Just breathe and relax.  Your baby girl will be here very soon.”  I was fighting back the waves of tears.  Tears may be made of water, but I felt flames.  I was consumed with fear and all of it was ignited by this place.  Hospitals, sterile tools, monitors, and the smells of bleach ignited the dread in my heart.

Let’s rewind.  Around three months before this day, I was walking around the county fair with my parents and my five year old daughter from my previous marriage.  My husband was out of town and things had been stressful.  I was trying to give her some good kid fun in the chaos that was our life.  She was riding the rides with my mom as my dad and I spoke about livestock and nonsense.  I had a difficult pregnancy up until this point and was enjoying feeling pretty good for once.  

I had lost my son in the second trimester that January and was gifted my rainbow two weeks later.  Was I stressed? Sure I was, but my grieving was numbed by the excitement of my new baby girl, Naomi.  

As we walked I started feeling sharp pains.  I couldn’t stop them, sit them off, nor drink enough water.  My dad drove me quickly to the local hospital.  I knocked on the door with hope for some relief and was met with, “We can’t help you here.  You need to go to the next hospital over.”  It was my hometown hospital, where I was born 29 years before.  After a sonogram,  I found out that night that my amniotic fluid levels were low.  I had a follow up the next week with my OB.  I was expecting the small and crass little man to tell me I was dehydrated or something.  Then, he urged me to go to a bigger hospital with my high risk OB.  I have type one diabetes.  That lovely autoimmune came to me in college, and gave me my high-risk status.  Anyways, my husband rushed me to the bigger hospital.  If the county fair and livestock talk wasn’t a give away, I’m from a very rural community.  The bigger hospital was five hours away.  We drove on nerves.  We were unsure of our condition, and discussed how everything would be okay, as we drove.

Everything was not okay.  

There, the high risk doc told me they have saved younger babies.  I was given steroids for her lungs, and was expecting her to come then.  My fluid kept getting lower and lower.  My preterm labor was stopped and I was sent home for another follow up with him the next Monday.  

After the sonogram, “The good news is there’s dialysis and kidney transplant available in pediatrics.” Wait, what??  “Your daughter’s kidneys are enlarged and echogenic.  They aren’t making urine.  That is why your fluid is basically gone. I’m referring you to the Children’s hospital.  I have a college buddy that works there, and it’s closer to you.” I recall him telling me of the will of a mother.  He had another patient, whom he was for sure the baby was going to die, and the mother refused to believe it.  The baby lived, even though it was a complicated and trying go.  This was not the story I wanted to hear.  Those were not calming details to learn about my unborn gift.

I was teaching at the time.  I had finally got back into the classroom after moving back to this area, my childhood community, after a rough divorce and a new and wonderful remarriage.  I had finally somewhat escaped my ex and was surrounded with the love and support of nearly all of my family.  Teaching is my heart, my calling.  Have you ever loved something so much that you can’t think of doing anything else?  That was me.  Education excited me.  I loved planning lessons, decorating my room, watching kiddos learn and grow, and I even enjoyed parent teacher conferences.  At the time of the relocation, it seemed that everything was looking up and things were starting to settle in my life...even after the miscarriage.  My custody battle was long and ugly.  Even though that portion of my life wasn’t over, I felt as though there was an end in sight...away from him.  More on that later.  

I drove back to my classroom after the devastating news. I drove in silence; my mind wondering and my heart pounding. I remembered the day I lost my son, Huck, as we named him. I woke up the night it happened with spotting.  I called my OB and she said it would be fine.  She said all the normal things you say to a pregnant chick.  “Drink water, rest, and put your feet up.” I went back to bed after obediently listening.  3 am came with agonizing cramps.  I looked down at the sheets to a puddle of red.  It was a warm coldness that I will never forget.  I looked at my sleeping husband for a second.  Should I wake him?  He looked so sweet and was so exhausted from work. That choice was no longer a choice.  He came to me as I ran to the bathroom, terrified.  Luke, my new love, was staring down at me after calling the hospital.  I told him I didn’t want to go.  I wanted to stay on that tiny bathroom floor forever.  I looked down at my son.  He was so tiny and so perfect.  My hands were red and so was everything.  The bleeding didn’t stop; it wouldn’t.  I didn’t want to leave my lifeless baby, so I put him in a container and we left.  I left him, and it was unbearable.  I had to have emergency surgery that night, a ride in an ambulance to the “bigger hospital,” and a blood transfusion.  The doctor said they nearly lost me, but I felt alone in the wilderness anyway.  Losing a child is a desolate and unexplainable experience.   

We buried our son between our newly planted apple trees.  I thought of those trees in the car. So little...perfectly designed. They had cute little leaves at that time and they were anchored down in the soil next to my garden. They were so petite and yet so full of life.  The irony was too much. 

 That seemed like the longest drive of my life, and I drove a lot in those days.  But like I said, more on that later.  

  It was a catholic school, that I taught at, and after arrival I wobbled in and I told the head mistress what the doctor said and immediately went to the church.  There was no way I could continue with my lessons for the day.  My daughter was in my class.  She saw me in the hallway, and I could see the joy leaving her face.  It was replaced with worry and that made me sick.  I told her mommy was fine, but she knew I wasn’t.   A sweet lady that volunteered at the school followed me.  She tried to comfort me, without knowing me...not really knowing me.  I cried and cried to Jesus.  I was angry, terrified, and anxious.  I recall the altar of the church and how beautiful it was.  I was pissed.  How can this altar be so beautiful, and my unborn baby be marked with some unknown disease?  I know that is a strange comparison, but it truly was agonizing.  My baby was beautiful to me. I had seen her many times in the sonogram. I had felt her wiggles so much, her hiccups, and her kicks.  I adored her as much as I adored the God that lived in that church.  She was from Him, so I had to refocus my thoughts away from despair.  I couldn’t though.  I couldn’t pray it off, kneel it away, or cry to him and receive respite.

  I left the church feeling alone and helpless.  This was a feeling I would feel all too often in my very near future.  

I had an MRI scheduled at the “closer Children’s hospital”.  My husband and I were a wreck.  Our bond grew stronger as our hearts grew weaker.  I had prayed for the intercession of a Saint that provides roses, in times of distress, the days before. I had prayed for my roses to tell me everything would be okay.  I had the MRI and as we walked to the room where we were given the diagnosis I saw beautiful roses on the nurse station desk.  I didn’t think anything of it. I had forgot about my prayers with all the stress of the situation. Little did I know that those roses would change my life.

Once again, I was sitting on a hospital bed getting another sonogram.  I looked at my sweet baby and could see her abdomen was completely full of something fuzzy...her kidneys.  The tech left the room without saying anything.  I could see her expression.  I knew something was gravely wrong before I walked in there, but I wanted her to give me rest.  What seemed like forever later a geneticist arrived.  He was a man about my age, tall and slender.  He was so put together.  He seemed so calm and collected as he told me our daughter had autosomal recessive polycystic kidney disease, and both Luke and I were carriers that’s how she got it.  He said we can get tested, and test for other deformations and genetic diseases.  He mentioned that most parents abort these babies.  He was calm and expressionless.  It was too easy for him.  It was his job, and that was science.  Then he left.  

We were moved to a room full of doctors.  Pediatricians, a nephrologist, a counselor, nurses, my new high risk OB..”the college friend,” and others were in attendance.  Most of it is a blur to me now, but I remember the nephrologist saying, “We like a challenge but she will probably not live more than a few hours to a few days. There is a one percent chance for survivability. If she lives, she will face more challenges than dialysis.  She has underdeveloped lungs and will probably get multiple infections, and will suffer her whole life more than likely.”  The pediatrician said, “We can terminate, or just let her go after she is born.  No one will judge you morally, religiously, personally..” etc.  They kept asking us if we had questions.  Our only question was, “How long do we have with her?”  They had answered it, and we just wanted to leave.  

Another long drive back home as Luke and I fought the idea of letting her die right after coming into the world.  How can we let our baby just die without giving her a chance? I remembered seeing the roses.  Those beautiful roses.  As we were driving we saw a pro-life sign with an infant on it.  It said, “choose life.”  We determined then and there that we would fight for her as long as she was willing to fight too, and that began this story. 

I continued to work after the diagnosis.  Sweetly smiling and teaching through my agony. I would mutter words of hope and faith to others that asked, even though I rarely felt those feelings.  I would look onto the faces of my students and want to cry, because my little girl would never have a sweet smiling teacher.  She would never learn to count, or read, or have the joy of watching the class butterflies hatch from their chrysalises. Everything was melancholic.  All my thoughts were consumed with comparisons to how my perfect little girl was not perfect, and that she would never experience the life that I was then just floating in. 

Then, one day, as I was giving a lesson on the alphabet, I felt those all too common cramps and pains.  They gained aggression and so I drove myself to the emergency room once again.  I was in preterm labor again, and they flew me to the Children’s hospital to a room next to the “diagnosis room” I had been at weeks before.  I was given many drugs on the flight to fight the pain and to hold off the inevitable.  I awoke in my new bed to another doctor saying, “You know there is a zero percent chance this baby will live, right? I just need to be realistic with you.” My husband told him to get out, and I fought off the delivery all night.  My labs came in and I was having a cardiac emergency.  They said my triglycerides were high and I was ambulanced to the the hospital “just for adults.”  The reason for my elevated levels was never fully diagnosed.  I remember one cardiologist saying it was “broken heart syndrome.”  They wanted me to do another test, but it would effect Naomi’s kidneys, so I said no.  There was no way I was going to hurt her little body anymore than nature was already doing. 

  I was hospitalized and on bedrest for most of the third trimester because I kept going into labor.  My body knew. It was trying to get the diseased baby out.  Yet, we fought.  Everyday they monitored me and the baby.  As I stayed there by myself I capsized into myself.  I tried to stay positive, and appeared to be on the outside, but that trauma was so much, I still haven’t gotten over it.  I longed to be home, fat and happy, while my husband doted on my pregnant body.  I wanted the experience to be with him and my daughter at home, and to be normal. I imagined taking pictures in front of the mirror and posting them on social media with comments like, “36 weeks and feeling good.” But, that wasn’t our story. This was not a fairytale.  I drew a picture of an inmate behind bars, and marked the days I stayed there until they decided to do a C-section.  I wasn’t allowed a delivery because of all the complicated aspects of the pregnancy; and there were quite a few. 

 The birthdate was chosen. October 1. I came to find out weeks after the birth that this was the feast day of St. Therese(The intercessory rose Saint). This was the day Naomi Grace was to be born and the day she was to die. 

 Now back to the surgery table. Crying as my legs went numb. I was feeling no comfort.  The only other surgery experience I had was after I lost my other baby, and here I was about to birth another baby that was probably going to die.  I knew I would probably only hold her after she had passed, or as she took her last breath.  I had months to fear and grieve the loss of those precious moments; breastfeeding in the silence of her nursery she would never see, kissing her cheeks as she whimpered for me in the wee hours of the morning, changing wet diapers I had carefully washed and put away in her drawers in anticipation of her arrival months before.  I had already told myself that I wouldn’t get those experiences, and now her birth was even more hideous to me.  There was no joy, and no excitement, and no happiness.  I was terrified once again.  

I heard her cries and they let me look at her, very briefly.  She was irregularly swollen.  I had a five year old daughter, so I knew what newborns were supposed to look like.  I battled wanting to hold her, but they swept her away.  I told myself it was probably better that way.  I wouldn’t have to listen to her gasp for air, or see the light leave her eyes.  My husband, my rock, left me there too.  He watched as they got her ready for her fight.  And I....I laid there crying helplessly with so much exasperation that I thought I could die too.  The typical exhilaration that comes after having a baby wasn’t there.  The relief from successfully carrying a baby for nearly ten months, and bringing them into the world to start their beautiful story, wasn’t there. I felt completely alone in that moment.  Then, my headphones started playing a song about a phoenix, and I closed my eyes, sighed, and prayed.