#and yet you're the reason why people need to be offline

[elitebutterfly]

many blogs on here be like

anonymous ask: a vague two-sentence statement about feeling not so great and wanting to change with little to no context about their life or what’s causing them to feel the way they do

“level-up” “hypergamy” blogger: so what. no one cares about your feelings. literally not a single one not even your best friend not even your mom not even your dog. everyone else around you is literally out here earning ivy league degrees and 8 figures and your stupid ass is still going to therapy because you’re weak. you were born into this world alone because and you’ll go out alone because no you don’t actually have friends or family or loved ones. nothing you process in the world exists only do you and thats why all of your problems are your fault. hell yeah solipsism. you should listen to what i’m saying because i am a one size fits all and if you even marginally disagree thats a you problem bestie. step it the fuck up. hell yeah let me pin this so everyone on this hellsite knows that I’m all about tough love and all of you soft bitches are beneath me. blah blah blah mindset mindset queen mentality level up hypergamy mindset money billionaire 

[channelinglament]

Sksjdjjkskskskskksk

I know I should be focusing more on reqs, but I had to take this off my mind skskksskks (btw I'm rn in the underground belobog part of story) (I kinda called it SAHSR as in self aware hsr)

☆•°Self-Aware Honkai Star Rail°•☆

Tw: no proofread, mentioned drowning(but it didn't happen), war, hate, religious themes, self awareness, kinda ooc, grammar mistakes because I am typing this at 12AM instead of sleeping, isolation

So, you know how in the beginning we play as Kafka? Yeah, I'm pretty sure she felt your presence. At first she was kinda weirded out, and was on guard. Who knows what you would do to her, while controlling her?

Oh look, you're helping her.. Hmm, maybe you aren't that bad after all. Still on guard, but thankful. With you she seems to fight more faster and is more efficient.

Same goes with Silver Wolf. They don't seem to mind your presence that much.

You even helped them to pick a trailblazer! But after picking them, you left Kafka and Silver Wolf. They didn't really mind it. They have been doing good without you, so it should be fine!

Meanwhile, the trailblazer is confused. First, they don't remember anything except their own name(or the name you gave them), then Kafka leaves and someone is watching over them. Oh how confusing and strange. But they caught early on that you're helping them. You're not an enemy.

During their "adventures" trailblazer starts thinking of you as a family. Kinda annoying since you control their body most the time (unless it's a cutscene) but you're cool nonetheless. They see you as a safespace.

Meanwhile March 7th and Dan Heng don't understand what is happening. Who is controlling them? Why after they met trailblazer? Why are you controlling them?

I think March would, just like the trailblazer, like you and find you annoying at the same time. Dan Heng would stay on guard (but also see you as safe space/nice person to hang with). Not as much on guard as when you first...met but still. It'll take him time to get off guard. The more time you spend with them, the more familiar they are with you, the more they like you.

Why annoyed, you may ask? Well, imagine you want to.. for example fight, but someone controls your movement and does it instead of you. Or goes the other way (aka exploring) instead of the path you've originally chosen.

They certainly would like when you make them stronger. No matter who is on your team, they'll like it (I mean, who wouldn't?)

But.. sometimes, even if they like you, they get tired of always being on the team. Thank you, yes, but they need to rest too. They mostly rest when you're offline, since..time kinda stops there. But when you're online? damnnn they walk and fight so much.. (I fr walk everywhere to find enemies to fight, so uhh, if you're like me, they would be tired and maybe annoyed at it)

I think some characters would even hate you. It doesn't apply to the main trio btw, they'll always like you. The reason some may hate you is that they have so much stuff to do, yet you choose them to walk around and fight all day. They're even supposed to be here! (For example, using Herta when fighting someone in Belobog)

If they could, they would scold you. But sadly game doesn't allow that.

It only appears in normal, self aware circumstances. Aka a normal self aware. Some like you, some hate you. You just kinda exist. (That one strange friend/sibling, y'know?)

But what if they would see you as a God? Something divine? Like in SAGAU?

Well, you're doomed, what can I say?

Everyone would want to be in your team. Oh, poor Gacha system.

They would hate it tbh. While in just self aware some would avoid you on purpose (aka busy characters), here? Where everyone sees you as a divine being? Oh dear..

Imagine several people trying to come through a single door, all at the same time? Yeahhh that's what happens. The standard and limited banner would literally fist fight while trying to get "home" to you. So don't be surprised if nobody comes home, at all.

But some may cooperate, and you may get more 5☆ or 4☆! Basically characters you wanted.

Those on your team would be proud! Mostly if the main trio are still there. Some would be envious of trailblazer. You're always with them, even if they're not on your team.(how could you?!)

Kafka and Silverwofl would be devastated. I'm pretty sure Silverwolf could possibly destroy the gacha system and come home. Only her (and maybe Kafka)

People in Belobog would hate the lore and everything game makes them do what they do. They're so happy they met you! You're here to save them! They don't want to fight you, so please don't be mad at them.

Honestly, if you were to get isekai'ed into hsr, I would recommend to the normal au.

The ones who hate you would just tell you off and never interact again, while your family/friends would hang out with you. Plus you could help a lot in Astral Express!

Maybe get Himeko and Mr.Yang some tea? Or help Pom Pom with whatever he needs?

If you get into the Worshipping Lunatics au..? I feel sorry for you.. You would never rest-

Whether you choose to stay at Astrak Express, or Herta's *I forgot the name* or whatever, they are all ready to wage war against each other. And if you decided to stay somewhere, that means you clearly favor them and their place more! Those who were chosen are happy/smug. While other try to improve their place/copy the place you've chosen to make you reconsider and stay with them.

The amount of gifts.. try to not drown okay?

They might even all agree to keep you in one place. Lock you in there and hope you won't be mad at them.

That's all for now

(Gotta work on reqs now or in the morning, they're still open btw)

[homucifer-ryotan]

(TW: Mentions of CSA (child sexual abuse)

All of these bad "protect minors" internet bills (KOSA or as I like to call it "Kill Online Speech Act", Bill S-210, Bill SB976, the EU bill for Chat Control, etc) frustrate me like crazy, but the reason why KOSA annoys me the most, beside the fact it requires government ID upload worldwide to use the web, not just in North America, (something these American pro KOSA politicians like to forget) when people outside of the USA did not consent to it, but also because it is very hypocritical to push Kill Online Speech Act to law this year to "protect kids" when the USA has child marriages still legal in so many states!

Excuse me Marsha Blackburn, Richard Blumenthal, Chuck Schumer, and Rob Wittman, do you (especially Schumer and Blumenthal since these 2 has been pushing for KOSA the most) not realize how weird it looks to push for KOSA in America to "protect kids" when these "marriages" are still around? Getting a 16 year married to someone 4+ years older than them is way worse than most things on the internet. At least they can they can close or turn off their smartphone/computer. Getting out of a "marriage" like that would be super difficult.

—

Since an Committee mark up (not an actual vote yet) for KOSA is happening this Wednesday (September 18th) please, if you're an American, email or call them calmly (unlike me in this post doing a vent) to vote NO on KOSA and patiently explain why this bill should not happen. Tell them how bad it would look for America if KOSA becomes a thing to "protect kids" when the end of legal child marriages didn't happen and wasn't a priority before any internet bill. Please tell that other danger to kids offline that should be focused before KOSA or any other internet bill. (How can you protect anyone under 18 from the "dangerous internet" and then have them spend less time online when things outside the internet isn't safe either?)

Also if you are American parent, please, please call and tell them you are against KOSA, don't let the title of "Kids Online Safety Act" fool you. It won't do anything to help your kids.

If you aren't an American parent, but you know any, please tell them why KOSA is bad for kids and everyone else so they can also call against it.

Everything you need is below:

(Credit to @super-firepaw119 for contact information below. Also this post is important to see and this google doc has who need to call and what you can use to say)

Thank you very much.

[nonbinarydeity]

Simplifying Manifestation/Shifting

Disclaimer: I don't mind if this isn't how you want to manifest. It's okay to have rules that make it work a certain way for you, it's okay to do things your own way. This is just how I understand manifesting now, and if it doesn't resonate with you, that's fine 🥰

So okay, I've been reading a couple of things from an amino user and I've realized so much more deeply what reality is and how to manifest and just everything. Please please please go read those posts because they explain it really well and I'm not an expert on this (yet!!).

Also I'm going to be focusing on my journey and I'm gonna be deleting the Tumblr app because there are WAY too many limiting beliefs on here. I'll do my best to answer questions about this today and tomorrow, then I'm offline for a while 🥰

The 4D and the 3D

So how I understand it now is different from what a lot of the community believes, but I swear that understanding this makes everything so much more simple and stress free.

The 3D is a reflection of your subconscious mind, which exists on the 4D plane. The biggest thing that people get wrong here is that the subconscious mind needs to be "programmed" a certain way. In reality, the subconscious mind is incredibly smart. It knows more about you and your desires than you do tbh. It's like your best friend, it's always trying to get you what you want, and it follows the rules you give it (more on this in a sec).

All you have to do to manifest/ shift is tell your subconscious mind what you want. That's literally it. You can even just say "I want xyz" and forget about it, and you'll get it.

When you ask for something, the 4D receives it and implements it right away. It gives the signal to the 3D to change, and the 3D does. Sometimes it takes a little while for the 3D to change all the way, but that's okay and normal! All you have to do is just wait and know that it's coming, you don't have to worry about doing anything else.

Rules

So the only thing that can get in the way of your manifestation/ shift is you. See, your subconscious mind follows every rule you give it, and humans have a tendency to put a LOT of rules on things, because that's what we're taught to do.

Say you're manifesting something, and it doesn't show up right away (because the 3D needs a little more time). You, being human, take that as a sign that it's not coming at all, and start assuming that something is wrong, or that you're doing something wrong, and you start putting all these rules in place trying to find an answer (think: I have to affirm more, I have to be in the wish fulfilled more, etc). Your subconscious then takes those rules you gave yourself and implements them, and suddenly it's taking longer to get what you want! This triggers a cycle of this (ask for what you want > don't get it right away > look for reasons why > make more rules/ change your rules > repeat) that can last for an infinite amount of time, until you're exhausted and give up entirely!

The key

From this, I hope you understand what you have to do. Literally, throw out your old mindset entirely and stick to these simple rules:

Ask and you shall receive. (Ask in this term could mean affirm, visualize, command your subconscious, etc)

Be patient. It might take some time but it IS coming to you!

Don't give up or accept that you'll never get it. The 3D could be seconds away from giving you what you want!

Most importantly: don't make a ton of rules for yourself!! Enjoy yourself, enjoy your time, be okay with the 3D for a little while because it IS changing in your favor. Don't force yourself to think about it 24/7, don't make yourself affirm every second of the day, etc!! All of that stuff is pointless! It won't get it to you any faster, if anything it'll make you doubt and spiral, which will lead to that cycle of self sabotage again. Just relax and let it happen 💕

And that's literally it!! Don't overcomplicate this, it's so important that you just relax and let it be for a little while.

I tried this during our walk today, and I had 4/4 successful manifestations (see a yellow car, see a green car, get paczki flavors I wanted [the ordering period was over, but I got the flavors I wanted anyways!!], find money [I started overthinking this, but I reminded myself that it was done, and we found it under a trash can of all things lol]) within my specific parameters (within our 30 minute walk to the store)! Literally all I did was say that's what I wanted and trusted my subconscious to give it to me, nothing else.

Outro

In the end, manifestation is not your job to do. Your job as a human being is literally just to enjoy life and ask for what you want. Everything else is your subconscious' job, and you don't have to worry about it beyond that!

Give yourself time and forgive yourself for overcomplicating it, because everyone does and that's normal and okay. We're human. We overthink. We overcomplicate. That's just what we do, and that's okay 🥰

I'm going to be answering asks about this post specifically for the rest of today and tomorrow, and then I'm going to be deleting the Tumblr app and focusing on my journey. I'll likely be posting again for updates and explanations of this once I understand it more deeply, but for now this is all you need to know!

[nalyra-dreaming]

Non-book readers need to be realistic and I say that as one of them. People will comment this show and pretty much everything, post pictures etc online as they watch stuff. They can put spoiler warnings, but you don't have to. That can be tiring, annoying and sometimes people just forget it. Sometimes websites don't work properly and show your muted words anyway. That's not anybody's fault. And I bet you do that to others too without realizing. I'm sure if I go watch a movie today and post reactions on twitter, some mutuals will be spoiled. I mean, we live in a collective, these things happen lol. We need to learn with it. Sometimes it happens to you, sometimes you do it to other people. The world doesn't revolve around you and people won't wait until you're caught up to have their reactions and discussions. The only effective way to avoid that is being offline and not talking about it in real life either. But I doubt anyone wants that. Besides, the show canon and even interviews were never really hiding any of it. They might not be like "Loustat is endgame, Claudia burns to death, Armand directs the trial play that leads to her death, Armand edited Louis' memories, you'll find this on episodes 7 and 8" and give all details, but weren't the "I had a daughter", "you only used past tense", "I can see where this is going" clear enough? Or at least suspicious? Or the overall weird Loumand vibe? Like, how come this guy is the love of your life and yet you're rambling about your ex in full detail and getting emotional? And why there isn't one Loumand scene that isn't them having problems or being somewhat happy with the ghost of Lestat between them. And they usually drop crumbs leading up to a reveal, because that's how cool plot twists happen, they lay the groundwork and then have the big reveal that makes everything fall into place and you're like "yeah, that makes sense!". Nothing here comes out as a full, out-of-nowhere shock. And also, sometimes people just guess things right by speculation. Without even being book fans. For this very reason. Blaming people for that is selfish. Enjoy things the way you want and let people do their own thing too. If someone goes to your messages and spoils the story for you, then you have a point, but regarding what people do on their own accounts? So if you go on a trip and decide to watch the episode a week later people will have to wait for you too? C'mon. Be serious.

Yeah, the internet waits for no-one^^ and all we can try to do is curate our dash.

[feral-radfem]

confession: i have a denim jacket full of radfem and lesbian patches and pins which is really cool. but i also have a little trans rights pin on there because i’m scared of being attacked in public for being a ‘terf’. i’ve heard stories of women being assaulted for being deemed a rad fem even when sometimes theyre not and this is ‘progressive’. i’m scared of the comments on posts saying vile and violent things to do to us and its congratulated. i’ve seen comments saying that basically lesbian means terf as this point and feminism is a huge red flag. i’m ashamed but i wear a trans rights pin because i am scared for my life.

I wouldn't wear that jacket to a gay event or bar. Or really any leftist space offline but everywhere else you should be able to get by without the trans rights pin.

Almost all the stories about radfems getting assaulted were at radical feminist events or at gay events not just wearing their merch down the street. Most people won't recognize it as radical feminist patches and the ones that do you can generally get away with feigning ignorance. So while I can understand your fear it is most likely not realistically proportional to the actual threat.

The reason we see the vilest and most outrageous behaviors and opinions on the Internet is because the internet doesn't have a way for us to hold one another accountable for our actions. Real life does. Which is why you don't see these tra types out in public acting the way they do online most the time. One of the few exception to this is when they are in a big group together and believe that group will protect them from the consequences of their own actions. Though, even then it's unlikely that they're actually going to do something that could get them in legal trouble.

Homophobia is nothing new and neither is a majority of the population having anti-feminist perspectives and misogynistic behaviors. Yet, like many of our fore mothers, most of us will not be attacked over these things. Not that it never happens, but it doesn't happen so often that it should be a realistic fear making it to where we don't feel safe to go outside wearing identifiers. Like I said, I can understand why you feel scared but the chances of you being physically hurt are slim.

Do what you feel you must, but remember your mental health is just as important as your physical health. If this is causing so much personal shame or even paranoia, simply don't wear the jacket. You don't need to be physically marked for everyone and feminism is more about the actions you do than the proclamations made in its name. Do good by women. The jacket, while cool, is insignificant.

I think it would also do you well to recognize that while your jacket is full of feminist messages, the trans flag being on there will immediately make any radical feminist who sees it assume that your definition of women is not "adult human females". You will be identified to us in public as a libfem trying to apply radical feminist praxis to males. Your cool jacket, in the end, will just confuse everyone; TRAs and Radfems alike.

It seems like you have like two chooses: You can either wear it and stand by what you believe in by making a display of your support for radical feminism or you can choose to not wear it and still do good radical feminist action but honestly mixing the two messages just seems like a lose-lose situation for everyone. You're not even expressing who you truly are and it certainly isn't getting translated correctly to anyone who looks at your jacket.

The fact is is that the clothing we wear when it has a message, whether that message is political or not, is an invitation for a conversation/debate about that topic. You seem not to want to have radical feminist conversations in real life so I would simply not wear the jacket, and I don't mean this last bit harshly, but your jacket also will look far less cool if you're insecure about it. So my advice to you is just to make your choice and live with it. It's what we all have to do at the end of the day.

I hope whatever you choose works out for you, genuinely.

[anotherquirkhelpblog]

i'm alive

hi, hello. it's me, brizzy. the owner of this blog that disappeared last month with no warning. i'm still alive, i promise. i'm not posting this from beyond. i just wanted to make a post addressing my disappearance.

where did i go? the simplest answer to this is just "offline". i have been spending my free time doing other things off of tumblr and trying to figure some stuff out and trying to do things to combat my chronic illness.

why did i disappear? as i said before, i had some other stuff i needed to invest my time into, so that is a big reason, but another big reason (if not a bigger reason) was the amount of asks i was getting was starting to get overwhelming for just one person to answer. i have been considering getting other people on the blog to help answer asks, but i worry people won't be very welcoming to others joining the blog.

am i coming back? i'm not entirely sure yet. hopefully i will, but i would have to start closing my ask box from time to time to not get so overwhelmed. as it is right now, i don't know what to do about the asks i currently have unanswered, especially because some of them i genuinely don't even know how to answer.

sorry for disappearing, y'all. i hope you're all well.

[orange-ghost]

Long post? I've been thinking a lot about Sia's "Music" lately. No, I'm not trying to insult her. I'm talking about the film. Her diagnosis has been all over my timelines, and most people are condemning her for the film's content nonetheless.

I think all the other big Autism accounts have criticized her well enough that I don't need to add on. As they should. They've all said what I wanted to say & I personally won't be forgiving her so easily. But the "Music" fiasco... actually reminds me of how PAPERBOY (my webcomic) was born, in a way?

Matthew & his classmates have lived in my head since 2015. And I remember that when I started PB, I actually didn't know I was Autistic yet, either. At the time, all I knew was that I was a kid in Special Ed, that disability was an unspeakable topic, and that a lot of the people involved in it treated me badly.

Kids' brains are like sponges-- they soak up whatever's around them. And I was raised drowning inside of an awful program. One that didn't show nor teach us respect, acceptance, or anything like that.

I resented, looked down at "certain" kids with the more noticeable disabilities, for "making SPED kids look bad! You're the reason we ALL get seen as less than!" And the thought that I could ever really count as a disabled kid was my worst nightmare. Because in my head, being disabled would mean that all this abuse was justified. And that I was truly & utterly inferior.

And I'd wring out all that nasty thought-process water. It would spill onto the pages of notebooks that became PAPERBOY's first drafts. And oh, believe me, it stained.

But, unlike Sia, I was a kid then. She's grown. She also put that shitty story up for all to see, while mine was restricted to notebooks. And it was only a year or two after I learned about being diagnosed as a baby that the ND movement(s) started blowing up online. So I looked into it, and like... it opened my 14-year-old mind up a lot.

So you know what I started doing? CHANGING THE STORY. Writing a better one. One that was much less hateful. And I changed the core message from "fuck disability, and fuck Special Ed too!" to "being different is not something we should feel punished and pain for. We are a community. And we deserve better."

Autism is neutral & one if the most human things I can think of. It's not to be demonized or glorified. It's not a tragedy, and it's not always some amazing miracle, either. We are people, not props. We deserve to be spoken & storytold about realistically. And we should be embraced at the end of the day. You need to be willing to learn how to listen & respect life's Autistics as they are.

Sia can't undo the real life harm she & her ableism inflicted. I can't, either. But... she CAN choose to change, grow up & out of it, and maybe lead her audience with her. Hopefully, with her new diagnosis, all that time offline, and a crap ton of self-reflection, she can. I mean, I managed, and I'm nowhere near as life-experienced, smart, OR skilled as she is!

Truth be told, I kinda hope she makes another Autism movie? With a big writing team of experienced, Autistic storytellers who know what they're doing. Cast Autistic actors. And instead of writing about somebody that she clearly doesn't see as an equal, she can actually level with them & write them a better story, too. "Music" was dedicated to somebody, right? I think that Somebody deserved a story where they're not just seen, but they're heard. And spotlighted! (Music certainly wasn't.) So... why not try again?

Or hey, maybe not even that, maybe she can try writing from her own experiences as an Autistic woman this time. Growing up undiagnosed, what that was like for her, dealing with a taught self-hatred in a mask that seems to have controlled her life.

I don't know. I like to live my life focusing more on what we CAN do about something instead of doubling down or getting stuck on what we can't. And I think others should, too.

Doubt she's reading this, but like... you've gotta make this right, Sia. Do better. Figure something else out. That's all.

[reflingthefox]

It's 4 am here. Feb 24th 2023, 4 am.

It's approximately a year since I was sitting awake, grinding the hell outta new Destiny 2 year content, when I heard weird, loud distant sounds. Then, the news broke out about war starting. Then, in less than hour, we were fleeing the city.

(Just in case, I'm not staying this late tonight because of some dumb anniversary. I'm prepping for another Destiny 2 year start. Timings are like this, sometimes.)

In fiction, it would be something something about horrors, obtaining trauma and looking for the ways to heal at this point. Sometimes, real life is like that. But sometimes, real life is dumbfuck, and it's dumbfuck I reminisce.

I think I scared my friends with the news I was fleeing more than I was hurt myself. Even now I feel like my stories hurt people I tell them to more than me. But at the same time, I have a superpower of not feeling how bad I am until it overflows. I mostly reacted to the air raids as "oh, huh", but then when I was left outta game raid event a couple weeks later, I broke down and cried for a day.

I farmed Flight Rising's Trickmurk Circus right in-between hiding in the cellar. It's the game's local holiday, it has so many things I didn't want to miss. When nothing was happening yet but tensions were rising, I even asked Ailinn to farm it wildly in case I go offline those days (so I'll have a place to get my stuff later). I didn't go offline, but I had to hide every so often.

Of course, it had to be called Trickmurk Circus.

Now every english-speaking person I tell this has to google "блядский цирк".

When the news came about some vehicles entering my city and getting lost in there, I wasn't surprised. I lived there all my life, and I know even locals get lost there every so often. The invaders didn't have a chance to beat the architecture clusterfuck.

The news I read consisted mostly of stuff like this for the first month. I guess people do need more dumbfuck in such moments.

Two months later I returned to the city. The people I was staying with were worse than bomb scares.

I started getting therapy. I started getting on track.

I shared at some point how the war felt liberating. Now I didn't have to worry if I'm a failure. "To survive is enough" was country-wide.

I promised myself I'd set up PayPal and do proper comms since it was relevant now. I never did. I struggle to draw unless I'm hyperfocused as hell.

Please make me hyperfocused more.

In the summer, I went to the countryside to meet my aunt and grandma. They relocated there before the war, fearing the city was too electricity-dependent. Then they got sieged. It wasn't probably too nice at that time, but when I got there, I was only greeted by more dumbfuck stories.

Then, half a year later, when I went again to visit for the late Christmas, I learned my cousin died on the frontlines, Jan 1st.

(I loved him. I didn't get enough time. He didn't go for a good reason. If he stayed alive for a month more, he would've returned for good. He helped me become me. I hoped his life gets better after this. It's not fair. Why.)

I'm not celebrating New Year next time.

In the autumn, some attacks managed to damage power infrastructure. We started getting scheduled blackouts - the city tried to preserve energy. Then we started getting sudden infrastructure drops for days straight. Sometimes there was no light, no water, no internet, and no way to learn the scale of stuff until one got to a public safety point.

I managed to download a few things before it got this bad. It was a right call. Nexomon Extinction, you're singlehandedly responsible for me staying sane the whole late autumnand early winter. Thank you so much.

Somewhere on the ride, I met Quotes and I'm so happy it happened. I thought I was not capable of making friends anymore, I tried so much, and kept failing, and drifting away the next day, and now with war in the picture, I wasn't capable to put the energy I was required to put for it to not fall apart. Turns out, it just has to be the right person, and then it clicks and isn't taxing at all.

I'm on my vacation right now. Somehow, between war and Covid and my work being not too mentally straining, I forgot to take my leaves and accumulated three months worth of vacation. So it's a month-long one, this time.

The last day at work, I just broke the fuck down. I think whatever was moving me forward turned off, and I finally felt how tired I am. I needed this rest. I hope I am getting rest.

My plants are dying, and I feel so guilty.

My snail didn't die, and that's both a relief and responsibility.

Time is a blur, and I'm crying again as I'm writing this post.

It's Feb 24th, 2023, and I survived. Please let me keep it on.

[playedestroy]

i do wonder what it is though that makes submission so... for lack of a better word consumable?

i say this with the asterisk that i'm not yet in a place where i can make contact with the community irl where i live, so my vantage point is also inevitably quite restricted, and i'm sure this conversation is already being had Lots And Lots in offline communities

but there's some kind of weird little cycle where the imagery and "aesthetic" we have come to associate with submission does numbers online - no doubt because a lot of that imagery involves skinny white ablebodied cis women - which creates a spiders georg of "oh most of this community is submissive?" which creates a perhaps disproportionate amount of articles/blog posts/etc that address the needs and emotions and soft skills for subs (which don't get me wrong are super important)

(we see this happen also with roles or activities that are associated with submission - from what i understand it's a big part of why there has had to be so much pushback to support the idea that there can be women who do puppy play, men who are kittens, that you don't need to have all the special branded gear that the instagram models say you should ... it's a commodification of kink and intimacy along quite hard lines of gender and whiteness and wealth that i'm still baffled by)

but then while there are plenty of tutorials of hard skills for doms - rope tutorials, flogging tutorials, etcetera - they tend to be 1) quite prescriptive ("this is your role as the dom and you can only do things this way") and 2) don't really address soft skills like how to be vulnerable and open with your sub (in a way that makes said sub feel safe and warm and trusted with and by you) while not feeling like you're "failing"

#2 is quite crucial i think especially given that the expectation of dominance often falls on cis men who are not encouraged or validated to do that in a way that is both respectful and responsible of both themselves & the people they're with

and the "aesthetic" of a dom seems to be less defined, and therefore harder to market - and in fact we have reason to distrust the image of a highly marketable dom because a lot of them seem to be more interested in money or control than in meaningful connections/scenes/relationships

a superficial glance in the tags will show 5 cute witty charming posts about the things subs wish doms would do to them back to back but there are few to no doms in the same tags, and if they are there the posts don't have nearly the same amount of traction

[angelojamal]

Spiritual Leadership Series #26: Monitoring Spirits.

In this social media age, it is expected, maybe even desired, and anticipated, that someone is viewing someone else, via social media, often. However, the social media sites have not made the function to view all who views them public. I’m sure that technology is used on higher levels of government agencies, but it’s not a common usage of the user. It is just a known fact that people view, maybe even are enthralled in the lives of others, without their knowledge. I never really participated in this normality, frankly because social media is powerful and I did not want to wage my mental awareness for the access to view someone’s lifestyle, however glamorous or non-glamorous, factual or fabricated, and true to life or digitally enhanced. So about ten years ago I decided to not scroll through the people I followed pictures or stories so I could keep my mental head space clear of competing, or potential envy, or possible misunderstandings. In my case that has been a life-affirming tactic that I still utilize when it comes to my social media usage. Now, every blue moon if prompted, I will like a picture or two but I quickly go to my own self-operated pages and post and then close the app. In no way am I attempting to act arrogantly, I just found that that helps me to stay focused on my personal growth and development.

In regards to monitoring spirits, I could always tell that certain people would monitor my post and attempt to craft a narrative of what they’d assume I was referring to and attempt to interact with me in real time from an assumption as their point of view. It is a headache at times. Yet that is the way of the world now. I don’t mind it, mainly because I am my authentic self, whether online or offline. Some people may not know who they are so they choose to curate an online presence to affirm their perceived superiority due to any form of superficiality, that they deem is acceptable in todays world. That curation and the dopamine response it grants can be both exhilarating and damaging at times. It all comes at a price, a price of one’s own depiction of reality. Thus creating an unnatural dependency on a fictionalized multiverse, of the haves and the have-nots. This comes from wanting to “be like them” or fit in “with the jones’,” the greater society as a whole. Either way it comes from a need to monitor what is trending and then replicate that.

On a spiritual level, this sermon was a good breakdown of monitoring spirits, whether they show up in people or not. They are spirits of the devil, sent to record all the actions of believers, in an attempt to thwart the movements of God’s people. Have you ever noticed that people that despise you the most, are monitoring you the most? That is a problem. They always watching what you do and then when they see you sometimes they will mention to you their actions with stating “you know I can see you, right?” It is somewhat flattering but it is all the way weird. If you hate what someone is doing or represent, why “follow” them, I know I wouldn’t. Also, why isn’t this seen nor treated the same as actual harassment, such as literal “stalking?” But it is an attempt to see the progress that you are making and to counteract the steps to prevent further progress. It is shameful indeed, but since warfare is spiritual, it’s the spirit that is dwelling within them. Pray that the angels protect and pray that adversary spirits go get some real business. But if you are really being used according to God’s will, then just know, YOU… are they business, they have been assigned to watch you for a REAL reason. The devil commissioned it, but God allowed it to be so. Stay prayed up, stay in the word so if a scripture is needed to be spoken to get them away from you then you’d be able to have it ready for that adversary spirit. That is similar to having your sword drawn from its sheath and ready for action, when the time comes for battle.

[pokeheros-drama]

"You called me a moron and challenged me to reveal my username"

Wrong anon hun. You realize you're talking to multiple people here right? Anonymity prevents people from getting harassed, on and offline. That's what the comparison was about. Let's look at an example:

If someone has an issue with someone that is very popular or has power (ex: a mod) on the site, and they open up publicly about it, they are bound to be harassed by that person, friends of that person, and they run the risk of being unjustly punished if that person holds power over them. This not only puts the person that opened up at risk to harassment and bullying online, but you can look time and time again where people on the internet took it too far and doxxed someone they didn't like, putting that person and their family at risk. You can sit and say how nobody on PH would do that, but you can't know for sure they wouldn't. You don't know how far some people are willing to go. You don't know how dangerous someone on the other side of the screen is.

There have been countless times I've opened up the notification wall to see people giving information away that could be used nefariously. Something as much as "I love when this flower starts growing in my yard during spring :)" can narrow down someone's location without even doing any tracking. We don't think anything of it because there isn't a reason for anyone to find us. Because we stay anonymous. In the end it's the same reason you don't have your legal name as your username, the same reason you don't have your address in your bio, because people are always dangerous regardless of where they are. I know it might sound like I'm over exaggerating here but we've seen this happen on the internet so many times already.

Plus if you wanted people's PH accounts connected to what we say, why are you mad at us and not the PH rules against calling people out? We wouldn't even need this blog half the time if the rules on PH were different yet you're mad at us lmao

If you want something to be mad at, be mad at people picking fights without evidence, not at the fact they're anonymous.

.

[newytmp3]

How to convert YouTube videos to MP3 files

At some point or another, we've all wanted to grab our favorite song from YouTube and make it last forever by converting it into an mp3 file. But how do you do that? Give up trying to work out the techy speak and instead come along on this journey with me as I show you just how simple—and easy—it is for anyone who wants to put their favorite tunes in a pocket-sized format!

If you're looking to convert your favorite youtube to mp3 format, look no further than ytmp3! It's a totally free website that offers lightning-fast conversions for all the music lovers out there. There's no need to download any extra software or create an account—in just a few clicks you can get the audio from your favorite song, TED Talk, or anything else in MP3 format.

How to get started

To get started, simply drag & drop the YouTube link into the ytmp3 homepage and hit "convert". Then choose "MP3" as your file type and click "start". From there it'll take just a few minutes of waiting depending on how long the video is. Once it's finished converting, you can easily download it directly to your device for easy listening anytime.

And if that wasn't enough, ytmp3 also provides some other nifty features like being able to cut/trim mp4 files and even merge multiple mp4s together if needed.

Benefits of using the ytmp3 converter tool

If you're an avid music lover, you know that YouTube is the perfect way to access unlimited music. And if you want to take your listening experience one step further, then using a YouTube Video to MP3 Converter is a great option. There are myriad benefits to using such converters.

Save time and storage

First off, it can save time and storage space by converting videos into audio downloads; so you have access to all the songs without having to watch them every time. Plus, with it being easier than ever to find and play music on various platforms like Spotify or Apple Music, downloading files directly from YouTube only leads to cluttering up your device's memory space.

Build for everyone

Another major advantage of using such converters is the flexibility they offer in terms of format selection – most converters let us choose between different bitrates or even target specific devices for conversion; whereas watching a video requires preloaded players or codecs which may not be supported by certain devices like smartphones or tablets. So no matter where and how we want our music – as long as we use a reliable converter – we can get exactly what’s required for our individual needs!

Complete control

Probably the best reason why people turn towards such converters over other options is that they allow us complete control over audio quality in terms of output formats; plus, Web-based tools like ytmp3 are easy-to-use yet efficient enough for higher sound quality compared with other online services! All this makes these tools invaluable resources for anyone looking for hassle-free downloads from YouTube into high-quality audio!

Final thoughts

Now that we’ve looked at how to convert Yt to MP3 files, you should be all set to take your favorite tunes offline with ytmp3. The process is straightforward and fast, so you can get started right away. Plus, it’s completely free! So what are you waiting for? Get converting!

[khaleesiofalicante]

While a positivity blog is great, posing it in opposition with the "call-out" blog immediately devalues it. The one person who was called out on that account (the original one) was an adult sexualizing teenagers who blocked anyone who tried to tell her that what she was doing was harmful. It makes it seem like you're trying to support adults who sexualize minors.

There's no way to "communicate" with someone who blocks anyone who tries to "call" them "in". a call out is a statement that this type of behavior isn't acceptable and a promise to make the fandom a safer space for teenagers.

I asked very respectfully not to send me follow up questions on this matter. Because this whole "call out" thing had been weighing on my mental health.

But once again, I keep getting dragged into this.

This my response to every ask I've gotten regarding this matter over the last few days. The asks I've been ignoring because it's not my place to give an opinion on this. Or rather, I do not have to. I don't have an obligation to do so.

But here we are.

The very reason I find the call out blog problematic is because of a sentence you said in your ask.

You mentioned that because I find the call out blog problematic and I quote "it makes it seem like you're trying to support adults who sexualize minors."

This is the problem.

The call out is not the problem. It's the way in which they are being called out.

Over the last few days, I've seen tsc blogs, for the lack of a better word, being "investigated". Posts dug from the past, follower lists analysed, screenshots posts and shared in public.

This is not a call out. A call out refers to interpersonal confrontations occurring between individuals on social media. In theory, call-outs should be very simple – someone does something wrong, people tell them, and they avoid doing it again in the future.

Now I understand you mentioned an individual refused to listen. I will not comment on that - since I do not know this individual personally or how they reacted. I do not prefer to talk about people I don't know personally. Neither the people calling them out - or the person being called out.

But what I can tell you is that when you call out someone, it only works when you point out why they are wrong, not what what they are doing is wrong. So, instead of calling someone a pedophile, it is essential to explain how their behaviour impacts you or your peers. It is important to address this issue in the larger fandom, not just by spamming one person's ask box. Because this issue is greater than one blog.

The reason why I don't condone this call out blog is because it is so easily possible to get carried away and overpunish people, turning alleged perpetrators of upsetting acts into victims themselves. The moral high ground people stand on evolves from calling out to public shaming of individuals.

I am requesting this entire fandom to rethink your actions and to reevaluate your choices. All of you.

It breaks my heart that you would say that I support adults who sexualise minors when have spent my whole adult life protecting children from such people. It is literally my job.

I recently saw one of my dearest friends being called "homophobic" because they support Jace - because Jace 'outed' Alec and therefore those who support Jace are also homophobic. It really hurt because I know the struggles my friend had to go through in order to protect themselves from their own homophobic family.

It makes me so sad and yet so angry that you are not aware of the consequences your words have on people.

People who make such claims. You seem to forget that we live in a digital world now. You all seem to forget that we are living through a pandemic. We study online. We work online. We entertain ourselves online.

So when you shame people online so callously, it can affect irreparable damage on their professional lives. It can ruin their mental health. It can impact their families.

While the intention of the callout blog - and those who support it - might be honest, the way in which they are achieving their goal is incredibly harmful for people in this fandom regardless of whether they are guilty or not.

I want to point out that this call out blog achieves nothing. It doesn't root out the pedophilia and sexism that exists on Tumblr - or in the fandom. The call out blog does't achieve anything. I'm sorry. It had to be said. The only thing this blog achieve is spreading a culture of shame, fear and stigma in the tsc fandom.

So, I urge you to rethink your actions and reevaluate your methods.

I do not believe in giving bland advice. So, as someone who works on these issues, allow me to point you in an healthier and more effective decision.

WHAT CAN YOU DO?

If the goal is "a promise to make the fandom a healthier space for teenagers" then you are doing it wrong. I say this as someone who works on creating healthy spaces for teenagers. It's up to you whether you want to listen to me or not.

But you are going about it wrong. Here is what you can do instead.

1. What we are doing wrong? Currently, you seem to be focusing on the people - not the issue. If you want to make the space feel safe, you need to address the root cause. What differentiates a call-out from bullying is that it shouldn’t be about punishing someone for something they have done, rather it should be about establishing a new pattern of behavior. In other words, when someone calls you out they want you to start showing through your actions that you care about the issue you’ve been called out on. So, show that you care about the issue.

2. How do we show we care? Focus on the teenagers. You are focusing on the wrong group of people. Cancelling out someone or calling out a blog or getting someone to deactivate is not going to make teenagers feel safe. Trust me on this. You need to address the issue to the victims. You need to ASK THEM how they want to be feel safe. While your method might work for you, it might not be what everyone wants. It might not make everyone feel safe. So, talk to your peers. What is it that you can do for your own community? Is it writing an email to CC about this issue in the fandom? Is it addressing it in a larger platform like a magazine or YouTube? Is it reaching to Tumblr and talking to them about doing their job and enforcing the community guidelines efficiently? THIS is how you fix the problem - not by chasing people out when you find them to be problematic.

3. Why are you complicating this? Why can't we just call people out? Because then you will only be addresing the symptoms, not the root cause. I understand that most of you are minors and therefore will not have the same awareness about how the system works or don't ahem access to same resources and opportunities we adults do. But unfortunately, it is our reality. We all live online. We all need to educate ourselves and do better.

I'm sharing an excellent resource here which was developed by UN WOMEN in 2021 to speficially tackle the issue of bullying, disinformation and hate speech experienced by youth - especially young women. It's a free online course that helps you learn this topic better. It even gives you a certificate from the organization.

I am ALL for calling people out as long as you do it the right way. So, if you want to be a warrior on Tumblr, if you want to protect your peers, if you want to create a safe space, you need to learn how to do it the right way. Otherwise, like most social activists, you are doing more bad than good. Your attempts to create a better world only lead to more chaos and pain.

4. I still don't understand. Then here is a simply answer. I hope this helps.

Please make better choices. Be conscious of how your actions online affect people both in digital and offline spaces.

You are allowed to fight for your safety. You are allowed to fight for your rights. But you are not allowed to hurt another person to prove your point. Then your whole initiative becomes counterproductive.

You need to be more aware. You need think more critically.

Finally and most importantly - I once again ask that you do not drag me into this. I am not the president of this fandom. I am not your parent. While it is my job to create awareness and work on online safety, I am not on tumblr to be an activist. This is my safe space. This is my comfort space. This is where I come to take my mind off all the stressful and heartbreaking things I have to work on as an activist. I am here to shit post like most people. I do not have to teach you to be decent or how to be sensible or how to be kind. That is the job of the education system and your family.

I'm sorry those around you have failed you and it has come to this. I only hope you do not fail yourself.

Make better choices.

Love, Dani.

[haven-in-writing]

Bloodthirsty (2)

Part two of Bloodthirsty catch up Here

Summary: More questions arise as you lie to your teams faces. 

____________________________________________

              Two Gods and A Vampire

The silence was beyond nerve wrecking, the team of righteous heroes sat unmoving in a judgmental stupor. You were sure their minds were working overtime trying to piece together the many chips being tossed about in the living area by a specific pain in the ass Norse god. You didn’t know what to say but you needed to figure something out, and considering you were sure everything in the compound was being recorded and monitored, it needed to be believable.

“Not that it hasn’t been explained before, but I was used as a stand-in for their mutated super soldier serum remake that was botched. I was practically dead when they took me from that village, no thanks to you,” The venom in your voice made it clear to Loki that he was to blame for leaving you there for the people that were after him. He didn’t know that it wasn’t Hydra, or that they weren’t the ones to revive you but it was close enough to the truth, you had been used by Hydra but that didn’t happen until the 60’s. The partial truth didn’t register in his mind as a lie, he felt genuinely horrible at leaving you to those pests experiments. You hoped it was enough to take the pressure off of you as you asked the team a question, trying to change the topic of conversation.

“Why is Friday offline, and what’s with the no lights? I thought I was walking into a trap or something,” you couldn’t help but wonder what the reasoning behind it was.

“Oh, point break over there “accidentally” shot out our electric box by beaming down too close to the compound. Friday is undergoing some maintenance so this doesn’t happen again,” Stark answers while glaring at Thor for his transgression. That calms your nerves a bit, they weren’t trying to trap you and they didn’t suspect anything.

Yet. Your subconscious held the nagging suspicion that sooner rather than later you were gonna be forced to show them your hand. 

You’d leave without a trace before revealing yourself to them, no need to let them in on the darker avenues of the afterlife. That would be a problem for another day though. Shrugging off your leather jacket, you take your leave and head to your room to shower and relax. Not bothering to listen to the continuing conversation taking place between the team and the two gods, you start your after battle self care routine feeling less nervous now that you were away from Loki. 

You didn’t know what it was about the god that had you so frazzled. He left you for dead in that small village, not bothering to at the very least bury you properly. The sword had pierced close to your heart, not directly through it, but that didn’t matter. You still bled out on the muddy path that led to the town's hermit who just happened to be a vampire. An extremely old and disciplined vampire that took pity in his cold heart for a young maiden bleeding out next to horse shit. One blood transfer later and you were waking up on a bed of furs, the icy cold venom had flooded your body leaving you frozen in time in your 23 year old body. You could barely remember the actual date but you placed your turning around the early 1800s, losing track and not bothering to care enough to write it down. Besides, the last thing you needed was to have someone snoop and find out you were older than the big bad criminal organization Hydra. Unaware of the conversation taking place across the compound, you settle into your routine.

“Are you certain about this brother? Lady Y/N may be older than she appears but you're saying she's in her 200’s,” Thor whispers to Loki in Asgardian as the team talks amongst themselves. 

“240 give or take and I am certain, Thor. There’s something very different about her but I’m quite positive she is the same maiden that helped me escape those wretched trials. Time has not touched her in the slightest,” Loki whispers back in Asgardian as well, so even if one of the mortals hears them speak they won’t understand. 

“Should I-,”

“Don’t say a word to Odin, we don’t know what she is for sure but even you know he would gladly collect her like his precious relics and bend her to do his bidding,” Loki cuts Thor off, the hatred for Odin seeping into his voice unwillingly. Thor only nods to convey he understands, not wanting to upset his brother further. 

Loki continues after a moment of silence, ”I’ll consult someone that may have the answers we seek if I cannot produce them without help,” Thor looks confused for a moment until Loki speaks again, “I have been missing the scenery in New Orleans of late.” 

As the gods continue to speak, Natasha listens very carefully while maintaining conversation with Clint about his and Kate’s escapades the other night while she was on a mission. Truthfully, she had always had a sneaking suspicion that y/n wasn’t telling the full truth about her past but that was her preference and she couldn’t fault her for that. However, if it was true what Loki was saying, the team needed to know who she was, no exemptions. 

Looking at her phone while still listening to both conversations, she reserved a hotel room in New Orleans for the following day so she could see what Loki would find out. Secrets got people killed, a lesson Natasha had learned the hard way. She also knew secrets kept people safe but the situations varied. This was one of those times where she wanted to determine the outcome before it became a bigger issue, one that couldn’t be settled with a simple explanation. 

“Hey Clint, mind doing me a favor?” Nat asks with a small smile. It was time she cashed in a couple of favors.

[angeloncewas]

All of the asks regarding the BBH situation are answered under the cut - I know we've gotten a resolution, but I felt like a lot of the things y'all brought up were worth talking about, so -

Both avenues feel like such a slippery slope.

If you blindly believe, you risk situations like this one, where a person was lying for the "fun" of it. Now, not only do they create problems for Bad, the community, and any theoretical victims who do try to genuinely come forward via the burner-account method, but they've also provided another instance that horrible people will point at and say "look ! they lie all the time !" It makes it worse for everyone when people pull awful shit like this and it wouldn't carry that weight if people had looked at it through a more critical lens. That's just the fact of the matter.

But on the other hand, being "critical" of a victim's account is so often what those awful people do. Why did you do [x], why didn't you [y], there's this one fault in your recount of your traumatic memory so clearly you're just trying to ruin this person's life - I have no idea what happened with the accusations leveled against Jake Paul, but his fans "criticized" it to pieces despite me and many others finding it to be both "credible" and horrifying. I know it's a risk, but I can't in good conscience not shoot straight for belief, y'know? And I think that's why so many people do the same thing.

(I'm rambling a bit - you're obviously correct for this case specifically - they claimed to be kids just "joking" and I don't even wanna get started with that because it pisses me off.)

I don't know if I never knew about the SBI burner thread or if my mind deemed it so stupid that it threw it out for me in my sleep, but wow. I know what you mean - burner threads as a whole are some weird practice that I don't quite understand. I mean, I get that it's for anonymity, but the way they pick up on Twitter is just... crazy. Idk.

The way Twitter persists is just awful. Like, it's common fucking sense that you don't make false accusations for a million reasons. It shouldn't even need to be said. And yet Twitter just runs with it and some of them still make shitty, weird comments about creators like Phil and H just because they don't like them.

I tend to hate the "get kids offline" battle cry by mostly annoying people, but there's really something about their mindset and attitude that has to be remedied by something Twitter is not gonna give them. Ugh.

The gaslighting thing was RIDICULOUS. I was trying to be more neutral about it when the accusations were still up in the air but now that they're very much confirmed to be a "troll" (quoted with disgust) I feel qualified to say that anyone who called BBH's responsible "threat" of legal action "gaslighting" has clearly never been gaslit in their life (and good for you, but stop acting like you know what you're talking about then). As anon 2 said, if he intended to silence the victim it would have made much more sense to threaten legal action privately (and I know that the person's DMs were off, but the point is that a public statement like he made draws very quick and clear attention to both him and the accusations leveled against him).

Anon 1's advice is very pertinent (though it didn't wind up coming into play here) - always always always be careful of what you're clicking on, especially when sent to you by strangers. A person could've linked "proof" of the situation in DMs that was actually something that collects your personal info (for example) and while that sounds harsh considering the nature of the accusations, it's a reality we have to deal with online. Staying safe is a lot of things when it comes to the internet.

There's a lot that goes into this, so I'll try my best to be concise.

People are overwhelmingly superficial. It reminds me a bit (if you'll pardon the odd comparison) of that post that went around a bit ago talking about how fat gay men are more often painted as creeps while fucked up twinks slide on by purely because of the way they're perceived by society. I'm not saying that BBH is gay or fat, but I will say that he's probably not "conventionally attractive," especially when it comes to "influencers" and so I see comments like those more than I should (which is never, but even more than from the expected odd weirdo). It's just awful; as though you can tell what a person's like simply based on surface-level characteristics like that. Many abusive/dangerous/etc people play up and off of the way they're considered attractive because of shit like that.

I also saw people saying that they "always suspected" because he's "childish" and it's "weird" - I know he has whimsy, but BBH has always stuck out to me as very clearly an older member of the MCYT community so the whole situation just felt off and wrong to me. (And that's not even discussing the way "we always knew" type language is damaging toward everyone involved... yeah, it's just fucked up.)