#another night of poetry

[hiljaisuudesta]

Ich hab am lichten Tag geschlafen. Es weint das Kind. Es blökt das Rind. In meinem Weidentraume trafen Sich Leiseklug und Lockenlind.

Kaum weiß ich noch, warum ich lebe. Vereist mein Blick. Mein Blut verstürmt. Wenn ich die Brust im Atmen hebe, Sind Felsen über sie getürmt.

Die Schwester auch am Nebelhafen, Sie bietet süße Brust dem Wind. Vor klingender Taverne trafen Sie Leiseklug und Lockenlind.

Den Sternen, die am Himmel pochten, Warf Köcher ich und Becher hin. Ich bin mit Mohn und Tod verflochten Und weiß nicht mehr, ob ich noch bin. - Klabund (1890-1928)

[hauntedbythenarrative]

You're the gun in my lips that will blow my brains out

Fallen Angels (1995), dir. Wong Kar-Wai//I know the end, Phoebe Bridgers//Waiting for This Story to End Before I Begin Another, Jan Heller Levi//Pink in the night, Mitski//craigslist (on tumblr)//Fallen Angels (1995)//Waiting room, Phoebe Bridgers

[sadghostgirl14]

[derangedrhythms]

the one I wait for doesn’t come

Alejandra Pizarnik, Extracting the Stone of Madness: Poems 1962-1972: On This Night, In This World; from ‘On Another Night, In Another World’, tr. Yvette Siegert

[fieldofdahlias]

and suddenly everything stopped.

i can't breath

i didn't see your face,

why is my heart racing

but you're as beautiful as i remember.

gods i missed you

your hair is shorter now, it looks good on you.

my whole body is shaking

i heard your voice, it's as hypnotic as ever.

i still love you so much

i'm glad you didn't see me,

i wish you would've seen me

i don't think i could handle our eyes meeting again.

i'm miserable without you

i hope you're happy, you deserve to be.

i don't want to walk away from you

- dahlia

[fairydrowning]

"And when nobody wakes you up in the morning, and when nobody waits for you at night, and when you can do whatever you want. what do you call it, freedom or loneliness?"

– Charles Bukowski

[princessofpatras]

Survivor (Victim)

Did I survive? I breathe, I think,

but am I alive?

I did not overcome—I failed,

gave in, gave up.

I never fought, and never won.

I slayed no demons—I couldn’t

face them. I left

the door wide open, let them in, let them

change me, erase

me,

bury me cold,

six feet under their monstrous weight,

I laid down and was grateful

for the rest and how they allowed me to

hide. I closed my eyes,

but my mouth like a wound remains

open, waiting

for the right moment—for the right

words—to scream, waiting

for caring hands

to claw through the earth and tear my body

free—

waiting always, always choking

on the dirt that fills my lungs,

as countless bright full summers

pass above. Is this breathing?

Is this living? I fear I’m just a ghost,

a whisper

of what could have been, what once was

—tethered to this place

by a thin thread—

You have not found my corpse.

[rainsparadiso]

Now that I’ve actually got my music streaming correct (been off the scene for about a decade..((tragic, i know)) too much dancing and not enough singing), I’m happy to celebrate my ever-lasting love for music 🎧

So here we go, I’m sharing 4 songs every weekend to bring the people happiness and inner warmth for the soul, starting with songs I would say I have the deepest connection with; this week it’s all about the rock and roll just to show you guys what I’m about.

Firstly I want to show you Iggy, the man famous for being a sex-crazed, drug-maniac who was always writhing around on stage, cutting himself with glass and who was in and out of rehabs* for his hardcore lifestyle.

*David Bowie famously used to bring him his heroin whilst he was meant to be getting clean.

IGGY POP-LUST FOR LIFE

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Secondly I am proud to show you the only artist of this week’s list that I have actually seen live (he still checks in on my mum on socials to see how she is ^^’). Also a heroin addict for many years but from what I know I would class him as a reasonably responsible drug user “I’d always try to be as clean as possible when I was playing music”. Another reason why I am proud to show you this song is that it features in ‘Paul’ (starring Simon Pegg, Nick Frost and Seth Rogan*). What I’m trying to say is I heard the song before the movie and regardless here it is. I give you…Peter Perret and The Only Ones

*Sigourney Weaver also stars. (sci-fi royalty..Alien <3)

(search: The Only Ones -Another Girl Another Planet)

THE ONLY ONES -ANOTHER GIRL ANOTHER PLANET

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Nearly at the final track but before that we have the Hanoi Rocks, headed by frontman Michael Monroe(pictured. blonde). A Finnish glam-rock group who basically crafted the genre and went on to inspire ‘pioneering’ groups like Mötley Crüe and Guns ‘n’ Roses. Well, fuck them! The Hanoi Rocks were the REAL DEAL! THE REAL PIONEERING MUTHAS IN 80’S ROCK! Other members of the band included Andy McCoy and Razzle* (R.I.P)

*portrayed in (2019) The Dirt, movie focusing on the Crüe’s rise to fame through drugs, women and booze

HANOI ROCKS-DON’T YOU EVER LEAVE ME

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Finally, I believe this can change and grow the feelings you might have of an old flame (sorry! 🙈🙉🙊), it ignites so much passion in myself and really puts you in a mood that makes you want to pack your things and find the one. If you haven’t heard her yet; you’re welcome.

PATTI SMITH -BECAUSE THE NIGHT

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Tune in next week, for more.

[perktarts]

When is it my turn to be wanted? As selfish as I am, I want to be wanted.

They shunt my sisters and I from bad to worse, from place to place to place along with their trash. They call us degenerates and label us as pedophiles so they have excuses for their actions to soothe their children and calm their blackened hearts. Even so my sisters are strong and resilient, they find peace, and happiness amongst each other. How I envy them.

I sit in my empty field, cast out eons ago. Watching the stars go by, letting life pass me by. The wind tells me stories about the people who love, people who hate, who torment, who survive, who lives and who dies. Even as I listen to my sisters fighting for their lives, no one comes to my field. Not enemies, not strangers. Their spaces don't want me. I'm too scary, too loud, too dirty. I don't fit there, they make it clear that the only place for me is my empty field.

To be amongst others I must cut off my face and attach it to a presentable sterilized abstracted fragment of myself. Every muscle clenched to hold the mask of my face, the mask is perfect it must be or they'll find out who it's supposed to be. If they do they'll hate me like they did then.

When I see my sisters blossom and bloom I wish them the best but deep inside I want that for myself. I want a place in a community that wants me there. That wants ME there, not the mask I use to reflect them back at their selves...

Maybe you're not so alone after all, sister.

[lethesbeastie]

I miss being able to do more than 3 things in a day.

There's something wrong with my body, with my brain. Something I haven't put a name to yet, though I've got hypothesis of what it might be. Something is plaguing my body, weighing down my limbs, my heart, my head.

Do you ever feel as if you live your life wading through water? Like you've been drowning for years, chained by your ankles to am impossible weight, struggling inch by inch across the open ocean floor?

Probably not.

I'm starting to realize the way I live is far from mundane, farther still from humane. I struggle to eat. Struggle to shower. To stop. To rest. Like a shark underwater, I swear on God it feels if I stop moving, I will drown.

I can't stop moving, can't sit still, can't escape the static that starts to stutter up my spine the moment i try. It hurts to sit more than it hurts to move, more than it hurts to grind my own joints into dust, chasing the slender phantom of nervous system regulation.

Stimming, I'd said. That's what the pacing is, that's why I have to stay on my feet from the moment I leave my bed, that's why I can't ever, ever sit still.

I'm not so sure about it now.

It hurts to sit still. Hurts to move. Hurts to think and think and think, to have ideas, to want to Make, but to be denied release by the exhaustion that plagues my body.

I'm tired. So tired. I am tired of feeling tired, of feeling both everything and nothing at all. Nervous system circuits short circuiting inside me, I'm impatient with my own exhaustion, desperate to do anything except to search for rest. No one has ever taught me how to rest.

There is something wrong with my body. Something I'm trying to name (something that the doctors will claim is nothing at all), something haunting me, parasitic in its nature, in its pupputeering of my aching, shaking hands.

I want it to get better. Want to stop feeling half dead and less than alive when I rise to greet a day that's almost over. Want to stop seeing the disappointment in my mother's eyes when once again, I cannot gather myself into some semblance of humanity long enough to do the god damned dishes.

I'm trying to fix this mom, I promise. Thank you for doing the dishes for me. I'm sorry I can't get better fast enough. Yeah, I'm tired of my bullshit too.

[mylitlekitten]

Blinding lights pierce the eyes from behind

Striking lines stretch from the round circumference

The lights grow closer,

The pain intensifying with each second until it passes

A glimpse in the mirror sends shooting pins into the brain

The brightness of the truck’s beaming headlights do nothing for the growing headache

LED lights do not twinkle the way the stars do

They do not dance and twirl in the sky with the moon

Darkness lurks beyond the horizon

Following a trail of slowly fading stardust

Never to be reached

Never to embrace that shadowy darkness that calls

Never to be held until the closing of tired, light-strained eyes

[ailelie]

This needs work still, but it popped into my head earlier and so I figured I'd share.

I want you like the sea Like the riptides at sea Drawing you out, drowning you down

I want you like a flame Like a wildfire Burn down your life, consume it all

Why can't you see? My love for you is a tragedy. You should run from me (Please don't run).

Why can't you see? My want for you will never end I'll take it all if you let me in.

I want you like the wind Like a hurricane I'll destroy your life, destroy everything

I want you like a mountain Like an avalanche Toss you off-balance, bury your home

Why can't you see? My love for you is a tragedy. You should run from me (Please don't run).

Why can't you see? I will consume you all Destroy your life Make you mine

I love you like the rain Like a thunderstorm Why don't you fear me? Why do you stay?

[aweepingwilllow]

i can't remember the last time i wept

i hurt, but the tears won't fall

i've cried waterfalls in happier days

but now, as the tears try to come out, they seem to twist into a false grin

it is as if i am giddy with sorrow

[scullydubois]

the x-files poetry: space (1x09)

a poem composed of words, phrases, & themes from season one episode nine of the x-files.

Houston, how’s the weather

up there?

Down here,

it’s a trick of light and shadows.

Forget progress and prosperity--

start holding your breath.

We’ve put too much faith in

instinctual impulses and

boyhood fantasies.

There’s no argument;

Mankind has tampered with

unnecessary jeopardy. 

And for what?

To unlock the doors of the universe?

The shuttle can’t survive reentry--

change its trajectory or get out.

Here is something you must

be prepared to do: devote your life to

getting stuck in orbit

before system failure

sabotages it all. 

[untitledroughdraft]

Taste of a cold spring night

I'll never forget the taste of this spring

The feeling I get when you play the string

Soft warmth in my hands as I drink the day

Sweet notes of honey slowly slip away

Nothing to eclipse the pallid crescent

Closed eyes and the world is evanescent

Those depths are so cold, I no longer see

But I hear you call, your voice anchors me

Blurred colors of life, nothing feels as true

I whisper a smile to the ghost of you

And bottle your words, filled with quiescence

Almost like you're here, I feel your presence

Twin poems - 05/2021

[nvrmindp]

Btw, i’m Paula & i’m an alcoholic