#anyway. why do i keep making excellent points in the tags this could have been a post

[leighsartworks216]

Hii I saw ur reblog about the kiss prompts!

I choose - "if you win, i'll kiss you"

With nervous kiss and height difference! 😳🙏

I actually had a hard time trying to fit these prompts together but I think I did pretty well!

Warnings: knife throwing, height difference

Word Count: 1,327

Masterlist

AO3

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“What’s that make it now? 12 to…?”

“You’re such an ass.”

“Come now, dear, you’re being too harsh - my memory isn’t what it used to be, you know. How many wins do you have?”

Your glare could have burned a hole right through him, all the while Astarion looked every bit the smarmy bastard he was. He just loved teasing you. It satisfied him to no end to peer down at you as you fumed. Steam could come pouring out your ears and he’d still have that smug smirk on his stupid face.

You huffed through your nose, fighting the growing urge to throw the dagger right at his head - you’d miss anyway. This whole game started when you’d tried throwing a knife at a goblin as a last ditch effort. You missed horribly, and Astarion just couldn’t let it go. “Zero.”

He gasped dramatically and laid a hand on his chest. “Not a single one?! Well, this won’t do!” He leaned in, teeth showing as he grinned wickedly. “How about we make a little bet? Make things a bit more interesting.”

You scoffed. “So you can sweeten the deal in your favor and wipe the floor with me, again?”

“Hmm, I tell you what: in the interest of keeping things interesting, I’ll give you two throws. If you hit, you win.”

“Let me guess - you get three.”

He rolled his eyes. “Please, darling, I have some tact. I’ll get one throw. If I can hit the dummy square in the head, I win.” He accentuated the point by flipping his dagger in the air, easily catching it by the hilt by pure muscle memory alone.

You frowned, studying his face for any sign of deceit. You were getting really close to hitting… Gods, this is a terrible idea. You sigh. “Fine. What do you propose?”

A spark of mischief flickered in his eye, so quick it could have just been a trick of the light, but you knew him better than that. “If I win, you’re responsible for sewing up everyone’s clothes for a week.”

“And if I win?”

He smirked and lowered his face to be right next to yours, cold breaths tickling your ear as he whispered. “If you win, I’ll kiss you.”

Your heart raced as your face flushed. You could tell he noticed, too, when he pulled away with that self-satisfied look on his face. You cleared your throat, urging it not to shake as you grumbled, “It sounds like you’re making more out of this either way.”

“Yes, but one is certainly more desirable for you, no? Besides, what are the odds of you winning? You should have nothing to fear.”

You frowned, but he had a point. Resigned to your fate, your shoulders slump. “Fine. It’s a deal.”

“Excellent.”

You both lined up about 10 feet away from the straw dummy. It had numerous marks in its head and body, all landed by the vampire spawn beside you. But you felt good about this time. You felt you could actually hit it.

You didn’t hate the idea of kissing him, especially if it meant saving your hand the cramping of patching up your companions’ clothes, but, well… You’d never been kissed before. There was no reason why, you’d just never been close enough with someone to warrant it.

Your heart raced thinking about it. Your face was as warm as Karlach by now. But you swallowed down the feelings and focused. If you just aimed very carefully, you might be able to get it.

“You first, love.”

Gods, now was not the time for endearing pet names.

“Hush, fangs.”

He chuckled softly, but stayed quiet otherwise. You held the handle of the dagger, just as he showed you, and aimed. You took a breath, lifted it up, and with a quick swing it was flying through the air… Right over the dummy’s shoulder. You growled in frustration.

Cool hands smoothed over your shoulders, urging them to relax. “Take it easy, dear. Keep your wrist locked and keep your elbow tucked in when you lift the dagger to throw.” He slid his hand down your arm, leaving goosebumps in its wake as he showed you how to keep your wrist straight and your elbow close to your ear. Then, he backed away and watched.

Shaking off the phantom feeling of him standing so close, you readied yourself again. You aimed, pulled your arm back so your elbow stayed tucked in, and steadied your wrist. With a deep breath, you threw the knife.

Time seemed to slow down as it flipped through the air. All sound faded away. You weren’t sure you were breathing. All you could focus on, all that mattered, was this stupid dagger.

In barely a second, the knife found its mark in the straw ribcage of the dummy.

A tidal wave of excitement and joy shot through your system. You cheered and pumped your fists in the air and gave a victorious yell that put Karlach’s to shame. And then, in the next instant, another knife flew by and lodged itself right next to yours. Your breath caught in your throat. Your eyes were wide when you turned to Astarion.

He smiled, part genuine and part impish. “Congratulations, darling. It seems you’ve won.” His smile only grew more flushed you became. He crowded into your space, peering down at you like a fox staring down a rabbit. “Don’t tell me you’re going to back out of our deal now.”

You swallowed. “I…” You glanced around camp, but no one seemed to be paying attention. They were all too busy preparing for the next day. You met his eye again and lowered your voice to a whisper, meant for his ears only. “I’ve never kissed anyone before.”

His eyes widened, brows raising minutely. He never thought the brave, compassionate leader before him would be so… inexperienced, to put it kindly. You’d always seemed to carry this sort of confidence, he just assumed…

“We don’t have to,” he back-peddled. He’d never have suggested it if he’d known. Well… Okay he would, but that look on your face - puppy-dog eyed and uncertain. It twisted his insides. He started to step away, out of your space, but you caught his arm.

“No, I…” You took a breath to steady your shaky nerves. “I want this.”

“Are you sure?”

You nodded, but he could still feel the anxious way you fiddled with the fabric of his shirt. It was cute. And terrifying. You wanted him to be your first. It was only fair - you were his first after all.

Moving slowly to give you a chance to back out, he raised his hands to cup your jaw, fingers brushing over your pulse and tilting your head up. You were shorter than him, enough that he had to hunch a bit to meet your eyes like this. You held onto his arms, too unsure to hold him anywhere else. He leaned down, noses almost touching. He could see your eyes flickering from his eyes to his mouth; feel your heart beneath his fingers as it skipped with his proximity. In a final act of courage, you stood on your toes and met him halfway.

It was clumsy at first. You had no idea what you were doing, all you knew was his lips were soft and he tasted like wine. He gently tilted your head, smoothing out the initial uncoordinated start. His lips meshed with yours as he showed you exactly what to do. When you experimentally nipped at his lip, he almost groaned. It wasn’t perfect, but he was sick and tired of perfect. It was wonderful. He was almost reluctant to pull away. But you still needed to breathe, living thing that you were.

He chuckled as he pressed his forehead to yours, watching with rapture as you caught your breath, lips swollen so beautifully. “You are full of surprises, aren’t you?”

---

Tag List:

@satelliteapotheosis @hypopxia @flsalazar @beverlybeav @angelofthorr @emiemiemiii @marina-and-the-memes @lynnlovesloki @aurasyn @furblrwurblr @cappsikle @mjmygd @thegirlsadventuresinwonderland @mheerdraws @kindadolly @httyd-chocolate @bloopthebat @pandimoostuff @chesb0red

[hopefulromances]

I Can See You - Jamie Tartt Smut

I think I only had to post like 120 lines or whatever according to that writers poll (tagged by @whimsical-roasting and @sokkigarden ) but I decided to just go ahead and post the whole thing.

edit: I was actually tagged by @alwritey-aphrodite SORRY

Warnings: Minors DNI (18+ ONLY), sex, pnv, fingering, cunnilinugs mentioned, I'm acespec so give me a break with this

Summary: Roy's sister comes back to town.

Words: 4.1K

Exploring the halls of Nelson Road by yourself wasn’t something you’d thought you’d be doing. It was kinda insane that you hadn’t been here before but I guess there’s a first time for everything. The walls were filled with history and memorabilia of the teams long history in the Premier league.

            “You lost, love?” You looked over for the source of the voice. Jamie Tartt. You knew who he was, how could you not.

            “Uh, a bit, yeah,” You smiled back at him. “I’m looking for the coach’s office.”

Jamie walked over to lean against the wall in front of you. His eyes were downright devilish as her smirked at you.

            “The coaches are in a meeting right now. You’ll have to wait,” he explained. “But don’t worry, I’ll keep you company.

You quirked an eyebrow at him. “Oh, how kind of you.”

            “It’s one of my charms, kindness,” he drawled. “Amongst other things.”

You liked this game. You liked his face, actually, a lot. No one could deny that Jamie Tartt was an attractive person, and you’d be lying if you said you hadn’t stared at him as he played the game. Watching his strong legs and arms float him around the pitch, sweating and jeering for 90 minutes. He was good. Really good. And it was enchanting to watch.

            “Other things?” you questioned, tapping your chin. “You must be referring to your excellent football skills.”

Jamie chuckled, his eyes not-so-subtlety moving down and up over your body. “My football skills are quite good, I know. But, eh, that’s not what I was talking about.”

Despite your confident nature, Jamie was making you blush. You looked down, trying to hide the redness in your cheeks but glanced up through your eyelashes. But before you could respond, you spied your brother coming up behind Jamie.

            “Roy!” you called out. Jamie flinched, turning over his shoulder to see Roy approaching them. “I got lost, Jamie here was keeping me company.”

Roy glared at Jamie. “Was he now?” 

            “You’re here to see Roy?” Jamie questioned, looking over at me.

            “Course, I am!” I smiled giving Roy a friendly punch on the shoulder. “He’s my brother.”

Jamie’s eyes practically bulged out of his head. “Wait! But you’re not Phoebe’s mum.”

I rolled my eyes. “No, I’m not, I’m Roy’s other sister.” I turned to Roy. ‘You don’t talk about me?”

            “Fuck no! Why would I?” Roy grunted, shrugging. “Not their fucking business.”

That last comment seemed very pointed towards Jamie. I nudged Roy sending him a look that said, ‘back off’.  Jamie looked wildly, back and forth between you and your brother.

            “Anyways, you ready to go Roy?” I asked, trying to release the tension between the two men.

Roy just growled in response before hooking his arm with yours and starting to drag you away. You yelped and smiled, before turning over your shoulder and waving goodbye to Jamie.

            “Wait! I didn’t get your name,” he shouted out at you.

            “Fuck no!” Roy barked back.

I giggled and shrugged at Jamie, but not before sending him a smile as Roy walked me out the door.

The next time you came to pick up Roy, you waited in the parking lot. But Jamie emerged first, and you couldn’t help yourself.

            “Hi, Jamie,” you greeted from your space against the car.

He looked over at you and his eyes lit up. As much as you tried not to let it affect you, seeing him light up at the sight of you made you smile.

            “Roy Kent’s sister,” he replied, putting his phone away. “Good to see you.”

            “Good to see you too, Tartt,” Your eyes moved of their own accord as they looked down and up his body. He was wearing a denim shirt with the word ICON written across it and a single earring that was driving you mad. “Good game today?”

            “Sure, we won” his hands came to rest on his cross-body bag. “You here to pick up granddad are ya?”

You raised your keys in the air. “Got me. Goin’ to Sam’s restaurant thing tonight.”

            “Oh, yeah?” Jamie’s eyebrows went up with interest. “You’ll be there?”

            “Come now, Jamie,” I hummed, “Aren’t you afraid of my brother?”

Jamie scoffed. “I ain’t scared of nobody. ‘Specially not that hairy bastard.”

You widened your eyes, looking over Jamie’s shoulder. “Hey Roy!”

Jamie jumped, turning around quickly, an excuse already bubbling past his lips. When he turned and saw no one there he looked over his shoulder, frowning. “That’s not funny.”

            “I actually found it quite amusing,” you retorted, unable to hold you laugh back. When Jamie turned back around, he was much closer to you. You felt your breathing hitch and stood up straighter, so you were eye-to-eye.

            “Did you?” Jamie murmured, much too quietly, much too intimately for the conversation.

But you didn’t back down, despite your shaking breath. “I did, Tartt.”

You and Jamie stared at each other. Jamie’s eyes glanced down at your lips before meeting your eyes again. God, he looked so good. His hair dangling in his face just begging for you to run your hands through it. You see it. Teeth clashing, lips gnawing, hands wandering. All you needed to do was reach forward for him.

You could feel yourself leaning forward when the door to the club slammed open. You and Jamie flew apart, putting a good amount of distance between the two of you. As you suspected, Roy came walking over to the two of you. He looked back and forth at the space between the two of you and the innocent looks on both of your faces.

Finally, he turned to Jamie, and poked his chest, hard. “If you touch her, Tartt. I will rip you limb from limb.”

            “I didn’t do nothin’!” Jamie protested. “Was just saying hi, you dusty dirtbag.”

            “Hey, hey!” You rushed forward getting between the two of them. “That’s enough alright, both of you. Roy, let’s go.”  You grabbed Roy’s arm and started dragging him away from Jamie.

            “I’m serious, Tartt! Don’t even think about it!” Roy growled, even as he let you take him away.

            “Roy, stop it.”

The restaurant was great, it was beautiful. All the boys from the team were there and the food was delicious. Since moving back to Richmond, you’d been feeling a little lonely and were glad to finally find some people you could hang out with.

Roy introduced you to Rebecca, the owner of the team, and Keeley the PR manager for the team. Both of them were excited to meet you, welcoming you with open arms and a very filled champagne glass.

            “So, tell us,” Rebecca started, filling up your glass. “What do you do?”

            “Of course, Roy has told you nothing about me,” I laughed, taking a sip. “I’m a marketing consultant for major athletic wear brands. Nike, Adidas, you know.”

Keeley gaped at you. “Babes, that’s so cool, how have we not worked together?”

            “I don’t do brand deals, I do more… corporate stuff,” I explained. “Much less fun.”

As they continued to question me, I found my eyes wandering over to Jamie who was sitting, or brooding more like, in the corner. I tried to stay focus on the conversation, but my eyes kept drifting over to him. Was it possible that he was more attractive as moody as he was?”

            “What’s his deal?” I asked, nodding towards. Rebecca and Keeley shared a look, both taking long sips of their drinks. “What? Is he like… off limits?”

            “No… well, you for maybe?” Keeley responded. “He’s a sweet guy.”

            “Keeley and Jamie used to date,” Rebecca interrupted.

            “Oh, shit, I’m sorry,” you said, quickly, trying to cover.

Keeley waved you off. “Don’t even worry about it, I don’t care. I don’t know how Roy would feel about it.”

            “Fuck if I care what Roy thinks,” I shrugged, downing the rest of my drink.

Rebecca and Keeley laughed.

            “Yep, you are definitely Roy’s sister,” Keeley observed, filling your drink up again.

You managed to keep your mind off of Jamie for the majority of the night. That was until he got up and walked into the kitchen, where the bathrooms were. I waited a minute before excusing myself to follow. I found him leaning against the wall, staring at his phone outside the bathroom.  

            “Well, you’ve been moping all night,” I came over and leaned against the wall across from him. The hallway was pretty narrow, not a lot of space for the both of us but we made it work.

He looked up at me, his face lighting up once again at the sight, but not much. “Yeah, well, it’s Zava, innit? He’s more than enough for that lot.”

I hummed, nodding. “Well, Zava’s not the one I’ve been staring at all night.”

            “Oh, really?” He pushed himself off the wall. “Who you been looking at?”

Now we truly were inches apart. Our eyes matched, as he stared at me. I felt my face flush as he boxed me into the wall behind me. I bit my lip, practically salivating as I looked at him.

            “I was looking at you, Jamie.”

He pressed you up against the wall, his lips covering yours in a deep kiss. One that took your breath away and left your mind completely blank. So blank that you didn’t think about the rest of the club just a wall away, chatting and eating. So blank, that the fact that your brother would kill both of you if he found out about this didn’t even cross your mind. All you could think about was Jamie’s lips against yours, and the way his tongue was shoving its way down your throat.

His hands gripped into your hips, surely leaving bruises in the shape of his fingerprints for you to find tomorrow. He moved his lips, leaving sloppy kisses down your jaw to your neck where he began to suck a mark right behind your ear. A broken moan slipped past your lips, involuntarily, and Jamie’s lips left your neck. You whined at the sudden lack of touch from Jamie, but he just raised his head to meet your eyes.

            “You gotta be quiet, love,” he murmured, bringing a finger up to his lips. “Can’t make a sound.” He brought his hand to your face, tracing your lips delicately, before pulling them away once again. “Can you do that for me?”

You nodded hastily. Anything to get him to touch you again. He smirked before returning his lips to yours in a sloppy, heated kiss. You reciprocated, your hands flying up to tangle in his hair, pushing him even closer into you. Jamie’s hands slipped further and further down your back going down to cup your ass in his hands. The gasp that left your mouth was swallowed by Jamie as he kneaded your skin in his hands. Every part of him was touching every part of you, his hands pushing you into him.

Then, Jamie’s hand was slipping under your skirt. He rubbed you over your undergarments, feeling the dampness that had formed.

            “God,” He grunted, leaning his forehead against yours. His hand made tight circles over your most sensitive area, expertly teasing you through your clothes. “You’re so fucking wet already. Is this all for me?”

            “All for you, Jamie,” you whimpered back, leaning your head against the wall.

            “Mm, let’s take care of you, shall we?” he mumbled, pushing aside your panties.

His callused fingers ran through your slick, before landing on your clit.  You couldn’t help but yelp at the surge of pleasure that shot through you. Just as quickly as it was there, the touch was gone in a second. You wanted to cry but Jamie just shushed you.

            “If you can’t be quiet, we have to stop.” He brought his free hand up to cover your mouth. “Are you ready?”

You nodded and his fingers were back on you in a second. Keeping one hand on your mouth, he continued kissing your jaw and neck while his fingers explored your pussy. Trying to stay quiet was excruciating, every flick of his wrist sent your reeling as you closed your eyes and tried to quiet your mind.  Without warning, two of Jamie’s fingers entered you down to the knuckle. You bit your lip, trying to dampen the wail that was trying to make its way through your lips.

You could feel his grin against your neck as he began to pump his fingers in and out in and out over and over. Stroking your insides just the right way to buckle your knees. But Jamie kept you propped up against the wall. His thumb found your clit pressing against it in rhythm with his fingers. He added a third finger into your pussy, stretching you just enough to drive you crazy.

You felt it building in your lower stomach. The warm pressure building as he pressed his nose into your check, his forehead sweaty against your temple as he focused on building your pleasure.

            “You close, baby?” He grunted against your cheek. You nodded again, not able to form words in your mind. All you could feel was Jamie’s body against yours and his fingers knuckle deep inside you. “That’s it, babe, go ahead and cum. Cum for me.”

Then Jamie pressed his thumb against your clit and moved his fingers in a ‘come here’ motion inside you. Like a breaking of a rope, your body snapped as you came. Your head flew back against the wall as your mouth hung open in a silent scream. Jamie smiled as he pressed a few kisses to your exposed neck, working you through the length of your orgasm. Once you stopped convulsing long enough to see again, Jamie removed his fingers from inside you, bringing them up to his lips to suck into his mouth. That alone made you want to cum all over again. 

You brought a hand up and grabbed him by the collar, pulling him into searing kiss. You moved your hand down to pull at his belt, but he stopped you, pulling your hands to wrap around his neck instead.

            “Fuck,” you breathed out against his lips. You still felt the aftershocks pulsing through you as he continued to kiss your jaw. They weren’t as sloppy anymore, more purposeful as he kissed your skin. “That was good.”

            “Yeah?” Jamie hummed, pulling back to look at you.

You nodded at him, sucking your swollen lips into your mouth. “Yeah.”

You wished you could say that was the last time you and Jamie sneaked away for a heated make out session. You started coming even earlier to pick up Roy from work, so that Jamie could whisk you into the boot room and make you see heaven.

He was an addiction. You were his secret mission. The two of you unable to stay away from each other. If Roy ever found out about it you would be done, for sure. But Jamie made you feel things that no one else ever had. He was giving and generous with what he gave, never once asking for anything in return.

But it became a real problem the first time you brought him over to your house. You were lonely, and desperate and Jamie texted you at just the right moment of weakness for you to cave instantly.

He’d barely made it two steps in the door when you attacked him with your lips. He was quick to reciprocate, kicking the door closed behind him.

            “Mm, someone’s missed me,” he murmured against your lips.

            “Shut up,” you breathed out, dragging him to your room.

He made quick work of you, making you cum in record time against his mouth. He smiled up at you from between your legs, wiping your slick off his mouth. You laid back against the table, your limbs going limp. He crawled up your body, caging you in between his arms.  

You looked up at him, head still a little foggy as he leaned down to kiss you. You hummed against his lips, feeling very content in his arms. He moved down your jaw, back to his favorite part to suck behind your ear.

            “You wanna let me help you out, Jaim?” You asked, your hands going down to his belt.

He took your hand in his, pinning it above your head. “Don’t worry about it.”

He returned to your neck, sending a shiver down your back. You couldn’t help but frown though, feeling like you owed him something. He’d never once let you give him even so much as a hand job. For the number of orgasms, he’d given you, it was the least you could do. Reluctantly, you pushed his face away from your neck with your free hand.

            “Why won’t you let me touch you, hm?” you asked, your thumb rubbing over his bottom lip.

He leaned down to kiss you again, softly. “Don’t worry about it.”

            “You said that, now tell me why,” you shot back, looking at him seriously. “Why won’t you let me make you feel good, Jamie?”

He cocked his head as he looked down at you, studying your features. “I don’t want you to think you owe me anything.” He leaned down again, his lips hovering right over yours. “I do this because I think you’re fucking gorgeous.” He kissed the corner of your lips. “I do this cause you deserve to feel so good, baby girl.”

You shivered again; he was really good at making you do that. But of all the men you’d dated, all the women you’d seen, no one had ever said anything so beautiful to you before.

            “Jamie,” you said softly. “I want you to feel good.” You pushed your hands into his back, pulling him flush against you. “I want you to fuck me, Jamie.”

Now it was Jamie’s turn to shutter. You could feel his hardon beneath his pants. He let out a shaky breath as he struggled to keep his hips still.

            “You don’t understand, (Y/N)” He nearly growled. “The things I see in my head… I can see you under me all night.”

            “Then make me stay here, baby.”

He didn’t need any more encouragement. His lips attacked yours, kissing you in a heated embraced as his hips ground down into yours. Your hands flew up around his shoulders, his large broad shoulders, before tangling in his hair.

You took control, wrapping your legs around his waist and rolling the two of you over so you were on top. Jamie grinned up at you as you took your shirt off, followed by your bra. He let out a content sigh as he looked up at you, his hands sliding up your back before finding your breasts. He licked his lips as he rubbed over your nipples with his thumbs. You shuddered covering his hands with yours as he held your boobs.

            “Alright,” you took his hands off of you. “You are far too clothed.”

He laughed and reached down to grab his shirt, struggling to pull it off over his head. You giggled going to help him as he tried to tug it off.  You finally managed to get it over his head and off his hands, balling it up and throwing it across the room. You both laughed as you leaned down to kiss him again.

You began leading your trail of kisses down his torso to his happy trail before finally making it to the top of his pants. You took his belt off, before yanking down his pants. He lifted his hips to help you as you fell back on the bed, tugging his pants off. You laughed again as you fell back on the bed.

Jamie, however, took advantage of your fall to grab you by your foot and tug you back towards him. He sat up and moved you, so you were resting on the pillows, back beneath him as he promised.

            “Look at you,” he groaned, looking down at your body as he rolled a condom on over his dick. “You’re so fucking gorgeous.” He attacked your neck, like he loved doing. “Underneath me.”

            “Jamie!” You cried out as he bit your collarbone.

            “Oohh, calling my name,” He chuckled, moving down to kiss the valley between your breasts. “This is what you were made for.” He came back up to your lips, kissing you slowly, tugging on your lip with his teeth as he pulled back.

            “Please, Jamie,” You begged, pulling his face back down towards you. “Please.”

He didn’t answer, just kissed you again. But his legs slotted between yours before pushing them apart with his thighs. When he pushed into you, you couldn’t breathe, breaking your kiss with Jamie as you threw your head back. Jamie didn’t miss a beat, following your lips with his own, covering them to swallow and noises that escaped your throat.

He rocked into you, slow and deep, rocking you back and forth with each movement. This was more than just fucking; this was church, and Jamie was your god. You moaned in a high pitch breath resting your forehead on Jamie’s as you wrapped your arms around him.

            “Look at me, baby, just me,” he instructed.

You managed to open your eyes to look at him. His eyes were beautiful. A stormy shade of blue and gray that captured you immediately. You rolled over again, forcing him underneath you. You sat back on his thighs, pumping him in your hand a few times before sliding him back between your slick thighs. You let out a breath as he bottomed out inside you. You looked up at Jamie who had a lazy smile on his face as he watched you.

You grabbed his hands and placed them on your breast, helping him to massage them in his hands. You bounced your hips against his, finding a steady rhythm. You adjusted your hips to hit that spot inside you that felt just right. You nearly collapsed against him as you felt him twitch inside you, getting close to the edge. He brought his hands between you to find your clit, rubbing quick tight circles.

            “Ahh, Jamie,” You croaked out, falling flush against his chest.

            “That’s it baby, keep it going,” He grunted, his snapping his hips up to meet yours.

It was too much. His arm keeping you wrapped against his chest, his other hand pressing onto your clit, his cock filling you just the right way, it was so warm and the warmth spread to all your limps.

            “Jamie, I’m gonna-“

            “I know, I got you, go on and cum.”

That was all the permission you needed as you mouth fell open and the cord inside you snapped and you stilled on top of him. No sound left your mouth as you stiffened in Jamie’s grasp, static shock filling your lungs as pleasure overtook your senses. Jamie let out a strangled groan as his hips began to stutter and he finally stilled as he came.

Your breath finally caught up to you and you fell off him onto the bed next to him. Your legs were still tangled causing you to face him as you did. Your chest heaved as you worked on regulating your breathing. Jamie turned on his side and pulled you towards him.

You rested your head on the same pillow as him looking up as he propped himself up on his shoulder.  

            “Fuck,” you breathed out, smiling up at him. “That was good.”

Jamie chuckled as he moved some loose hairs out of face. “You said that the first time… do you remember?”

            “Course, I do,” I replied, resting my hand on his waist. “I remember everytime. But this.” I nodded in contentment. “This was better.”

Jamie stared down at you, his hand sliding up and down the thigh that still rested on his hip. It was an intimate movement, but one you welcomed. He got a faraway look on his face as he looked at you.

            “What are you thinking about?” You asked.

            “Just how Roy really is gonna kill me,” he told you, pulling you even closer to him by your thigh.

            “I think we’re long past that stage,” you admitted, shifting to be on your side.

            “Yeah, but now I’m proper into you,” Jamie said. “Might even love you.”

And he meant it. You looked between his eyes looking for any ounce of disingenuity but there was none. You lifted your head and kissed him again, softly.

            “Well, then he better not find out that I love you, too.”

And you meant it.

[ratcandy]

hi hello hi!! i just finished bingereading cogr and i hope you don't mind if i yell into your inbox about your fic lol

SO FIRST OF ALL. i never expected i would get so attached to zote. but now i am! i will never get the neglect achievement after reading this. but i can't even be mad it's so good

i have to say that it's a really, REALLY good example of how to add depth to a normally unlikable character! like by the end zote is still at least a bit of a bastard, but after knowing how horribly literally everything in his life has gone you can't help but feel bad for him and hope things start looking up.

plus, it provides an explanation for why he's Like That. genuinely if he got therapy to work through his multitude of issues he'd probably be, like, 10x nicer about everything.

also while i did read the tags, i can't say i expected it to be THAT dark, mostly because i was thinking "it's a fic about zote being a nosk it can't be THAT bad." but nope! this man is suicidally depressed and by the end he's barely even trying to hide it. i don't mind though, it's DELICIOUS angst

OH and the format of the fic, where it's presented as zote talking to Someone Else, is absolutely GENIUS for this fic. genuinely this choice makes the fic so much better. i mean ok to start off i normally hate first-person pov in fanfiction but this sort of format i like. HOWEVER that's not my main point here

this structure lets zote's personality really shine through. if it wasn't filtered like this, first of all everything would be revealed way too quickly but also the writing would lose all of its character and emotion. plus the tangents and mid-sentences corrections, the way he corrects and interrupts himself...it's all BECAUSE of how this fic is framed. i just...aaah!! i don't know how to FULLY express how much i love the way cogr is framed. just know that i think it was a perfect choice on every possible level

OH I JUST REMEMBERED!! it makes the ending possible, and holy shit the ending. it's SUCH a gutpunch to realize he's all alone, talking to nobody, and then he just...keeps on talking. i am still reeling from it as i type this ask. bravo i think this is one of the best endings to a fic i've seen, especially for a sad ending

other things i've noticed!! first of all, there is excellent use of zote's unreliable narrating for foreshadowing, as well as wonderful callbacks and parallels!! i don't remember everything 100% since i was admittedly reading pretty quickly but from what i DO remember, i'm pretty sure i could go through cogr and find a TON of good stuff like this.

one thing i noticed in particular, the way he based himself off of vessels...DELICIOUS parallels there. i don't remember everything like i said but i'm pretty sure zote says some stuff about how it was dangerous to express emotions in the nosk den? stuff like that makes the way zote chose to disguise himself as a vessel just...augh. perfection 10/10

i also LIVE for your nosk lore and worldbuilding. i don't have much to say about this i just really like worldbuilding and this is quality

i also decided to read the trivia doc and first of all. the yikes ending would have been...i want to say cruel but honestly i'm more inclined to say tragic? although cogr is already a tragedy...ooh that would be interesting analysis, although i don't really have fully formed thoughts on it yet

ON A LIGHTER NOTE, the au in the trivia doc with zote AND two siblings?? it's one of the only ways that this whole mess could go happily (although that's to be expected of a hollow knight thing tbh), and i am rotating it in my mind.

ANYWAY that's all i have to say!! or well it isn't but it's all i can think of and actually communicate understandably lol. anyway cogr is a 10/10 fic and i will be thinking about it for the rest of my life

I'M SO NORMAL ABOUT THIS ASK <-- SHE'S LYING SHE MIMED PUNCHING A WALL AND YELLED OUT LOUD "YEEEAAAAHHHH!!!!" WHILE SHE READ

I am deVOURING this I . HOUGH. Big long ask about my big long fic I must consume it so vigorously. my TTEEETH are ripping INTO THIS

OK !! 1: GOOD That you're attached to Zote now!!!!! I love hearing that I've dragged people into Hell unimaginable!!!! Fuck yeaH!!!

AND 2: hhoughHHHhhgouh ;s;;;;; hhhhg;sh. This ask is so nice I am smiling so much and giggling and kicking my feet. also the hdgKJH "It can't be THAT dark!" hdgkJH YEAH. IT. Tends to blindside people from what I've heard!!!!!!

Hhoguhhh ;;; I wish I could respond in a more cohesive manner but I am jus. Gushing . Thank youuu thank you so much I'm so normal about getting complimented

ALSO YOU DRAWING THE PARALLEL BETWEEN HIS DIGUISE BEING A VESSEL .... I kid you not I Out Loud just went YES!!! and started clapping and hooting and hollering because i"m so normal especially when my Funny Symbolism gets noticed dhKSHDGKLHG

AS for whether CoGR counts as an honest Tragedy ... obviously I would DEVOUR any analysis on it BUT From My perspective. I go with a Maaaybe ? Since tragedies are like. The downfall is brought about by the protagonist's own actions. And like. Yes! But also ? but also Sort of! I'm not sure!!!!!!

AND SIBLINGS AU YES!!!!!! That one has been developed a bit more since that trivia doc thing!!!!! I'll tag the siblings au tag in the. Tags, an u can go through what we had for it!!!!! It is indeed the only happy version of the story (with some inevitable angst still sprinkled in of course) but!! YEA!! Bronze (Zote's brother) and Silva (Zote's sister) are my beloveds for all time

OK I'm normal now. I'm so normal.Yep. Thumbsup emoji THANK YOU SO much for this ask I .will be returning to it frequently I'm sure. just so I can go EEE and flail my arms around and rip my teeth into it <33333333

[deusvervewrites]

You probably talked about this before, but I'm not sure if you have a tag for it and I've only seen you commenting this sort of stuff when you talk about the fics you're planning to do. I decided to ask anyway because, well, why not?

So, do you have a process for making your fics? Like, an outline, general rules you keep in mind, narretive structures, whatever and etc? Any preferred structures or (snrks) quirks of narrative and storytelling you enjoy making or seeing on other people stories?

I don't think I actually have talked about this, or at least in detail.

All of my fics started as a simple elevator pitch, like 'What If All Might told Midoriya he could be a Quirkless Hero?' or 'What if Midoriya got magical powers from a death god during the sludge villain attack?' or 'Cathleen/Inko raising Izuku.'

Then I move on to brainstorming, where I develop the idea further and work out how I want to handle it. Haigha changed the most conceptually, so I'll use it as my example. It started as 'I want to write Midoriya with All For One Quirk, but not related to All For One.' During my brainstorming process, I came up with the idea of him being experimented on by AFO as a test run for Nine and Shigaraki, only for something to go wrong and that's how he ends up confused in an alleyway with no idea that his Rabbit Quirk is just one he snagged from AFO on the way out. However, as I developed this particular idea, I realized him having All For One wasn't actually as interesting as the mystery of what happened to him and what Quirks he had, so I cut AFO out of it, and reworked the concept to fit.

I also usually have some ideas for future scenes or chapters in mind by this point.

Then I move on to my timeline of events. Since a lot of my stuff involves For Want of a Nail--a small change that goes on to result in far more significant changes--having a timeline helps me keep track of how the butterfly effect is going, and makes it easier for me to adjust as I consider the implications of a specific change more.

I usually use this timeline as my outline, but the timeline in When Freemen Shall Stand is rapidly diverging from canon at an alarming rate, so I might go on to have a second outline specifically for the contents of individual chapters, which will also make it easier to add in more slice-of-life content.

From there, the trick is to do what helps the narrative the most. Haigha for example originally was supposed to start with Midoriya waking up and realizing that his body had been changed, and learning that it's five months later than he thinks it is. However, I couldn't make this chapter work. I think I've still got two or three scrapped attempts at it somewhere. I ended up writing the actual first chapter so that I had something down, and it turned out to be a much better starting point. Referencing his recovery and the effects of his disappearance without showing them helped the mystery, and Nedzu quickly recapping the most important points while seeding future events made it an excellent introduction.

[satashiiwrites]

wip whenever

I was tagged by @monsterrae1​ a few days ago for wip wednesday… and well… my week has been a tad on the busy side.  So wip whenever…. Yeah.  Anyways thanks for the tag as always!  Tagging whoever would like to participate—no pressure. Banner by @radio-chatter​

Title: Sleepless in LA, chapter 2: April 

Fandom: 911

Pairings: Buddie endgame, will have mentioned Buck/Ali, probably Buck/Taylor and Buck/Abby mentions (at least… I haven’t decided how much taylor is going to appear) as well as prior Eddie/Shannon, and Eddie/Ana

Fic summary: 

Navigating the aftermath of Shannon’s death, Eddie never thought he’d be a widower by age thirty-two and raising a kid on his own without any help. When Christopher calls into one of those late-night talk radio shows asking how to help his Dad, Eddie realizes that he needs to try and move on for Christopher’s sake, so he reluctantly starts dating what everyone tells him is the perfect woman for someone like him.

It turns out Christopher, and he have much different ideas of just who they need. Buck has had a terrible year.  His physical injuries from the truck bombing were bad enough but having Ali leave him seems like a sign from the universe that he’s always meant to be alone. Listening to the radio at night, he hears the most adorable kid ever talking about how his Dad is sad and needs a new partner—LA kids are pretty progressive, and this Christopher kid isn’t particular if his Dad ends up with a woman or a man. It almost gives him hope, but who would want to date a firefighter who can’t help anyone?

A chance encounter on a pier, a tsunami, and a promise to meet up at the Griffith Park Observatory on Valentine’s Day brings together two soulmates who, in another life, would have met very differently.

Warnings/tags: alternative first meetings, heavily inspired by Sleepless in Seattle but not a fusion, tsunami arc/truck bombing arc, Christopher Diaz is a national treasure, heavy angst, peril of characters (but not this part unless you consider depression being in peril), first draft

Also, I made some new art to go with. Not really this chapter but… yeah. 

Physical therapy started even before the cast came off the third week of April.  Bobby drove him to his first appointment but Buck noticed how pale under his tan Bobby got when he picked him up afterwards.  Buck had been completely worn out by a forty-five minute appointments.  His stamina and physical fitness prior to the accident had been excellent which he’d been told repeatedly by all the medical professionals was probably why he’d been able to keep his leg instead of ending up with an amputation.

Well, all that fitness had vanished and he felt weak as a newborn kitten.  

Bobby had noticed and immediately began to hover, unable to hide how guilty he felt about Buck being injured. 

It wasn’t Bobby’s fault.  Buck had been clear on that.  The only person responsible was Freddie Costas, but what was even the point in blaming him?  The kid had lost his dad and gone off the deep end… which Buck could understand. 

What he couldn’t stand was Bobby looking at him like he was so Buck said he’d make his own way to his therapy appointments.  Maddie worked a lot of day shifts so she couldn’t take him to very many either and he hated asking her because she inevitably brought up what he was going to do with his life.   Buck hadn’t bothered asking Athena, Hen, or Chim because he didn’t want to find out what they thought of things or his life choices. 

Making his own way, at first, meant just ordering an Uber but that got expensive.  While he was getting disability pay, Buck knew that he couldn’t depend on that forever.  So he’d become an expert on mass transit in LA and the power of a TAP card. 

It also had the additional benefit of taking up more of his time. 

All he had was time anymore with nothing to fill it. 

Too much time meant spending it in his head, worrying about how he was going to get back to work or how he was going to help people instead of being a useless do-nothing.

[bluecatwriter]

2022 Writerly Year Review

I was tagged for this by @0nelittlebirdtoldme. I'm supposed to tag other people but my social anxiety got the best of me. But if you're a writer, please feel free to copy— I'd love to hear your answers!

Total number of completed works: 22— and that was just after starting writing my first fanfic in October! Pretty pleased with that.

Total number of WIPs worked on this year: I currently have 13 that exist as documents with at least a few words in them.

WIPs neglected this year: About eight or nine of the aforementioned WIPs.

Fandoms I've written in: Dracula Daily! I just started dabbling in 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea fic as well, and I drafted a Moby Dick fic a couple days ago, too.

Total word count: Published to A03? 93,839. Again, not bad for three months of writing!

Looking back, did you write more than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you expected? I didn't even expect to write fanfiction this year— I'd dabbled, but never actually committed to it, focusing on other projects (including my personal blog and two memoirs I'm working on. Is working on a memoir pretentious? I don't know. I enjoy writing about my travels. Anyway). So I definitely wrote a lot more than expected this year! Dracula Daily kinda grabbed me by the scruff of the neck and hasn't let go.

Did you take any writing risks this year? Goodness, yes! If you'd told me even six months ago that I'd be writing explicit smut, I would've been very confused and perhaps a little horrified. But it turns out that I enjoy writing it (mostly because it's incredibly challenging)? Who knew!

Do you have any goals for the new year? Nothing concrete, just to keep writing as much as I'd like, and to keep stretching myself and trying out different kinds of stories and scenes. And to have fun with it! That's why I'm doing it, after all.

Biggest disappointment? I don't think I've put enough pressure on myself for there to be disappointments— which is intentional. This is a hobby, not a career.

Biggest surprise? Other than enjoying writing smut? Probably how well other people have responded! I've never gotten this much feedback on my writing, and for it to be so positive and encouraging. It's been a rough year for a lot of personal reasons, and being able to open my email most every day to find a little pile of new kudos and occasionally comments has been... well, it's meant more than I think any of the commenters know.

Most popular story of the year? Judging by kudos? "An Excellent and Comforting Word," which is funny, because it was one of the easiest fics to write, because 1) I wasn't taking it too seriously and 2) I was basically just asking myself, "What is the most unhinged thing possible Jack could do at this point?" I'm not complaining that it's the most popular— I think it's pretty fun!

What's your own favorite story of the year? I'd have to say "The Train Trip"— it was the first fic I started working on, and one I spent a ton of time on (it was also the one I kept finessing as I waited in line to be allowed an AO3 account!). It established a lot of fundamental headcanons for the six members of the crew of light, and I'm still pretty proud of it.

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: Is the universe supposed to appreciate my fanfiction? I'm so confused! ;) I don't feel like any of my fics have been under-appreciated— everyone's been very kind!

Most fun story to write: Don't make me choose! In addition to "An Excellent and Comforting Word," I really enjoyed writing "Words and Voice Fail Me," a one-shot featuring Arthur and Jack being incredibly sweet.

Most unintentionally telling story: The amount of hurt/comfort fics I write is pretty telling, I'd say. My spouse and I have a running joke where I'll say, "I'm working on a fic. You'll never guess what happens," and he replies, "Someone cries and then someone else comforts them?" and I'm like "HOW DID YOU GUESS?"

My favorite part of fandom this year: The Tumblr "book club" for Dracula Daily was absolutely incredible— I had never experienced a book in this way before, and it jump-started a lot of creative endeavors, both fanfiction and fanart. I'm so grateful for the online community and looking forward to continuing to create in 2023!

[gildedmuse]

[Like five people read this original post so here is a way too long follow up.]

This post has been super evil towards me.

So originally was going to write an intro but, you know, never mind that I've had to struggle so much with this post. Also, apologies to @space-windu47 who I accidently sent an unfinished answer to privately and now this thing won't even let me tag. Fine, Tumblr, just keep being difficult.

[Why yes, there will still be horrible fonts with their cheesy names scrawled across this post in neon letters. Thank you for asking.]

Nami's plan is simple: STOP GETTING THEM CHASED OFF OF EVERY ISLAND BY A MOB OF PEOPLE TRYING TO KILL THEM!!!!

How to achieve such an impossible goal? Easy, they'll just make themselves look so beautiful and rich and cool that everyone will immediately love them (and possibly want to give them money to make them look as fashionable in return). What? Why are all of the boys giving her that look!? So far all they've managed to do was have them run off from each and every port they've come across!

Now, Nami will be their fabulous, beautiful, awe-inspiring captain and she will make sure the people of this next town are so mesmerized by them that they would never THINK of firing canons at them (unlike Usopp's plan...) She'll have to dress you lot up of course... her, Robin and Sanji could pass it off but the rest of you... No one is going to believe you're part of the world famous Glamour Pirates with such drab, terrible clothes. Oh, and Sanji,they're going to need a really high quality meal; they need to impress these people. If they look wealthy enough no one will suspect we're they're to rob them! ("But we're not trying to rob them anyway!") That's not the point, it just means they'll be more likely to trust them! Everyone is always trying to be nice to rich people even when they hate their guts. Trust her, Nami has done this before.

Robin: I think it sounds like quite fun. But Navigator-san, won't it be difficult for you to make such an elaborate entrance while guiding the ship?

Hmm.... Robin has a good point.... Not to worry! Nami KNOWS this will work, which means there won't be any real need for a navigator. She'll just be a proper captain and tell the crew where to steer the ship ("Hey! I direct the crew. I told you to head towards that island a few days back!" / "Idiot, that's why we're here.") They'll pull up to the dock, spend however long resetting the logpose, And then be on their way. Nice and calm. They just need someone who is strong enough to handle the ship and....

*looking around at her choices*

Zoro!

Crew: She picked Zoro!?!?

It's fine you guys! Like she said, nothing is going to go wrong, he has to do is stand at the wheel and turn it a few times (besides, what else can she have him do? Him and Luffy will ruin this whole plan if she lets them... Speaking of which, she needs to find something even a child can do to help keep Luffy out of the way....)

In the end the crew break down is as follows:

Nami and Nami "Cat Walk" Gold: Beautiful, Wealthy Model/Fabulous Rich Fashion Icon/Captain

Usopp Yorohiness "Snapshot-King" Uso-san: "Vice Captain" of Production, World Class Photographer, Ex-Arch Duke of West Blue (also, the crew chronicler and look out!)

Robin as Fabuloso "Designer Chic" Robbi: Premiere Fashion Designer of The Grand Line, Designer for Celestial Dragons, Most Wanted Fashionista In All The World. Oh, plus, the designer of our very own Merry!

Sanji as Alhellth "Blue Eyed" (give her a break, she had a lot to plan....) Sanki: Nutritionist, Personal Trainer, Health Expert & Body Upkeep ("what!? My sweet Nami-swan is trusting me to care for her body! I could have never even dreamed of such a gift, oh N-"/"Usopp, which writing do you like better?"/"Eh, the one on the left definitely says rich fashion heiress, but I think it still needs to be more eye-catching."/"I quite agree, Long-Nose-kun. Perhaps something so it can catch the light of the sun?"/"Excellent job you two, the three of us should be able to pull this off no problem!"/"Ah, just look at two such perfect flowers working together to keep us from further danger. I shall take my momentary job as the keeper of your body's shape as-"/"No one is listening to you, Stupid-Brow.") Anyway, the doctor, chef, and All around medical advisor about the Going Gold ("you just called it the Merry! You can't change the name halfway through!")

Chopper as Roi-al "Silky Sweet" Cho-po: Mega Rich South West Prince, ProffesionL Philanthropist, Representative from the kingdom of Cherry-Cherry Realm, Backer of this whole project. He's also, um, an amazing Ambassador! For all the ports we visit!

Luffy: Background Model

Zoro: Helmsman/Body Guard to Miss Nami Gold (all you have to do is stand there looking intimidating in this suit... He's, just like that, perfect! Now just stand around and don't speak or do anything unless someone threatens my safety!) And obviously, the ship's main weapons expert.

Chopper: 🤩 Zoro you look so cool like that!

Usopp: I always knew you were scary, but this look is a whole other level!

Robin: Our Kenshi-san does look particularly good like this, doesn't he?

Luffy: Oye, Naaaami, why do I have to wear these boring clothes?

Nami: Boring!? You would say that after I'd taken the time to find you such a fashionable look.

Luffy: I wanna dress like Zoro! He looks badass!

Nami: *sigh* You know what?

Luffy: Model/Bodyguard

Nami: I mean as long as it keeps him from causing trouble....

Spoiler: It doesn't.

[I know that Love-Love is often the translation of the Mero-Mero No Mi, but it also sounds like random ridiculous English that Sanji would use to name the crew on his turn, okay? Regardless of how this seems, this was actually Sanji's terrible choice, not mine.]

For the record, Sanji thinks Nami's plan was absolutely perfect and he loved it and it's not her fault that Luffy and that Marimo ruined the whole thing (and of course there is no way she could have ever known about that South Blue reporter who now lives on the island.) However, he has decided to take a different approach.

To help the women of this next island, however he can!

Usopp: He's just running around doing whatever they tell him –_–💧

Zoro: At least it keeps him out of the way.

Usopp: Hey, Sanji, you forgot to have us put your name anywhere!

His name and identity are unimportant, lost to the winds of time and love. The beauties of the Sea that they strive to help know him only as -

On'na-Hero

Chopper:💧💧 He's really serious, isn't he?

Usopp: Everyone else is getting a turn, I suppose it's only fair if we follow Sanji's plan while he's captain. 😅

Nami: 😮‍💨 He can't really expect women to call him that, can he?

Robin: *giggle*

Sorry to make you wait, Nami-swan! Robin-chwan! I'll be happy to tell the roles to two vice captain's of my very own heart!

Crew Breakdown:

Sanji: Captain of the Love-Love Pirates, a heroic, masked stranger who shows up at islands and strives to make the lives of the women there as perfect as possible. Followed by a crew of those who have taken vows to help women with their many great abilities (and also Marimo, since they wouldn't let Sanji kick him into the water.... What, he can swim. Water is a marimo's natural home, he'd be fine.) They will travel for miles at the faintest cry for help, will fight navy ships at a lady's command, will take on entire kingdoms rather than see a single tear fall from a women's ("Tch, ero-cook, we get it already. Just tell the rest of us what we're doing so we're not standing here all day!" / "So hungry..." / "So sleepy...." / "How long can he possibly go on like this?" / *Sigh* "We're definitely getting run off another island again...." / *Giggle*)

Nami: Vice-Captain, Navigation ("but Nami is always the navigator!" / "There, there Chopper...." / "Try to be understanding, Cook-san is trying his best for the crew." / "Mm, don't be sad. Sanji just doesn't understand how much fun some ladies have playing Pirate..." / "Hahaha, did he say Navigator!? That's obviously not what he meant because, err....")

😔😔

Chopper: Navigator

😏😌

Nami: Vice-Captain and Future-Guru: she helps all the girls out there unsure of what they will do in the future! Whether it be about money, career, or style as they grow! Nami-swan -

😔😔

Err, Beautiful Future-Swan can figure it all out!

Robin: Vice-Captain / Doctor ("obviously she's the only one left who is intelligent enough to be-" / "Oh, I think I'd much rather be the swordsman, this time around." / "What!? But I mean of course Robin-chwan, you'll be the most beautiful masked swords woman the world has ever known!" / "How do they know her if she's wearing a mask though? 😓" / "It doesn't make much sense. 😅") Beautiful Mask Swordswoman / Love-Guru: No matter how complex the maze that runs through your heart, Beautiful Love can cut straight through to where your prince is waiting on the other side!

Usopp: Ship Doctor / Cupid. That's right, Cupid goes around delivering wonderful gifts for any girl who is lonely or depressed or simply needs a chocolate surprise! For miles off he can spot sign of the slightest blue heart and fires these delectably wrapped bundles of perfectly made chocolate and strawberry tarts to the lady to brighten her day!

Chopper: Navigator / Love Tanuki ("What!?!?!?") He is Love's Lucky Charm! Whatever ales your heart, the Love Tanuki can heal with one sip of his magic potions! ("Chopper, listen. We may be playing pirates, but any woman on that island who needs a doctor, only you can really help you. Do you understand?" / "Mm! *Serious face* You can count on me, captain!")

Luffy: Helmsman (Chopper can't be expected to steer you guys...) / Love Angel: where ever the girl needs to be, Love Angel can take her in a snap!

Zoro: ..... ("I can think of one position that hasn't been filled." / "I have been wondering what we'll do after a long day using up all this energy helping these girls. I'll probably be starving, what about you Robin?" / "Indeed, Navigator-san, after such work they will likely all want nothing more than to come home to a warm meal! But surely Cook-kun will be in town with them all day, helping out with all these poor girls in need of a hero." / "Well, seeing as he hasn't assigned anyone else to be the cook, I guess Sanji-kun won't actually be saving any of the ladies himself." / FINE!) ... Grr... Cook. Marimo can be the cook.

He better not make the two ladies sick with his disgusting grilled fish!

[If you're wondering, Robin let Chopper and Luffy help with drawing the new Jolly Roger, though obviously since she has twice as many hands the majority of it was done by Robin. Oh, the design? No, that was 100% her.]

If she may, Robin would be quite happy to try her hand at captaining.

Zoro: Oy, you know this isn't a game, right? We're trying to get away from these islands without anymore of the ship being blown off....

So serious, Kenshi-san. Of course, Robin has given a lot of thought over the passed nine days to their situation.

Nami: See, Zoro!? I can't believe you're still so cynical about her after everything we've been through. (Besides, her plan can't possibly be worse than Sanji-kun's.....)

Chopper: Mhmm! If Robin says she has a plan to help get us out of here then we should listen! She'll definitely know what to do! (Unlike Sanji....)

Usopp: We should at least give her a chance, Zoro. Robin is super smart (and way smarter than Sanji) so I'm sure she's thought up something great!

Luffy: Plus, there's no way she'll screw up like Sanji did!!!

Sanji: *from the infirmary* We have to go back 💕💕💕 My heart can't take being away from my beloved!

Group: *sigh*

Robin is very grateful for all the faith this crew has placed in her. 😇

Now, they should all start changing into the costumes she's prepared for them....

Crew Registrar for The Last Psychopomp:

Rusalka "The Raven" Raven (Robin): Captain

The Captain of the Pirates of the Shinigami, who has been out sailing the sea for over twenty years in search of the soul of her lost lovers after they were torn from her arms and swept away by a freak hurricane (likely having drowned in the storm, only after hours of having their body tossed around, beaten by the fierce winds to near unconsciousness, though still calling her name through the howling tempest before being dragged beneath the waves and slowly suffocated at last).

Kallippos "Quick-Shot" Shishi (Chopper): Vice Captain, Sharpshooter

Vice-Captain of The Last Psychopomp and the best quick fire in the four blues. He's now come to test himself on the Grand Line, and to make new friends for Minklandia, his home back in East Blue. It's a small, beautiful tropical island filled with Fairy-People like Shishi. He left after promising their president (who is a dachshund whose desk is a giant wicker basket and who always wags his tail when he talks to good boys like Shishi) to make as many new friends for their island as possible!

Princess Victoria of Troimazon: Swordman, Wild Animal Whisperer, Witch Doctor

Born to a royal family, Princess Victoria was only three years old when her father and mother were brutally drawn and quartered before their body parts were displayed to the whole kingdom after their corruption drove the island to starvation and ruin. That might, to spare her from the rioters, her nursemaid dropped her down to the river, where Princess Victoria was saved by a mermaid farmer who brought her home and raised her as her own child. She has been attempting to make amends for her parents sins ever since, learning all the traits a good leader must know such as defense and healing. She hopes to one day return to her land and fulfill all her duties as the princess of Troimazon such as feeding her people, protecting them from evil pirates, keeping their treaty and marrying into the Alabaster Family, and freeing those who have been imprisoned during her exile.

Magellan "Wave-Rider" Clouds (Sanji): Helmsman, Muscian

Born in the North Artic, MagClouds spent his entire life sailing the rough Northern Seas in just a small, handcrafted rowboat. At 12 years old, he was throwing his spear towards a fish when it got caught in the fin of a giant singing whale. The whale pulled him along for miles and miles, and MagClouds could have let you of the rope at any time, but he chose to hold on, wanting to remove the spear from the whale's fin. When the whale finally stopped and he was able to remove the weapon it taught him a song, and whenever MegClouds needs the currents to change, he sings this song to summon the powers of the whale and change the ocean currents. Unfortunately, the whale then left him stranded in the calm Belt, unaware of the boy's plight. He stayed out there for nine days before a marine ship passed and took him on. There he meant the kindly, handsome young lieutenant Greenwood Apollo and his evil scientist father, Blackwood Danse. While Blackwood would spend many years forcing the ever grateful MegClouds to do his bidding, it was Apollo-san who saved his spirits and kept him from simply giving into the darkness of his current situation. It was only when the other boy was assigned to the New World that MegClouds finally abandoned his past savior, setting out to follow Apollo-san to the end of the world.

(Robin will keep some of her notes to herself)

Monster Cookie (Luffy): Cook

Their much loved cook, the boy once ate a strange fruit which allows him to take the nutrition he takes in from food and growing his muscles and limbs at super fast speeds! Thus, his name has long been forgotten the world over as he is only known as the Monster Cook. However, the truth is that their Cookie is a sweet and kind boy who always looks out for others, protecting his friends and anyone else in need. He does have to eat an extraordinary amount to use his powers, though, and so he spends most of his time locked away alone in the kitchen!

Kyoyūshi "Sniper Of The Giants" Usopp: Navigator, Pirate Captain, Prisoner

You may have heard of this unimaginably horrible man. He is a legend around the world, after all, and a known slayer of giants ("That's not what that name means!") The crew had the misfortune of running into him only a few nights ago, and while he was alone - nearby Islanders had killed and ate the others of his crew in a cannibalistic sacrifice - he still managed to dispose of most of those journeying along The Last Psychopomp. This includes their dear, sweet navigator, a young girl of only 14.... ("Robin.... Why???" 😮‍💨💧💧) Since then they have been forcing him to act as their navigator until they can find their way back to familiar territory, at which point they will do the honorable thing and slice each of his ("okay okay! Just move on to Zoro!")

The Man Of A Million Faces (Zoro): Preformer

Zoro: ....

Robin: *smiles*

Zoro: ....

Robin: *smiles*

Robin: I believe with such a colorful and terrifying crew it may be necessary for us to offer the locals some kind of entertainment.

Zoro: *sneer* And what do you want me to do about it?

Robin: I'm sure they'll find something about you to enjoy, Kenshi-san.

[nimblermortal]

@icryyoumercy

I’m sorry, I’m going to wake you up, let me just be a little bit quieter over here...

This might be the best package you’ve sent me yet and I haven’t even opened the bag yet. Chain wear indication in German? A pencil that grows when you’re done with it?

I feel like Hyacinth probably has encountered such a pencil before, but I have not.

And you sent me sprinkles! You’re proving a point from a conversation we had months ago! I am excited to open them and taste them. Hmmmm what sort of cake can I make in order to decorate... or should it be chocolate shortbread cookies? I can’t really decorate a sour cream marbled pound cake, or an angel food... usually I decorate Hyacinth’s carrot cakes... and the flourless chocolate tort would make a good base... I may have to do Cake January again after all.

TWENTY GRAMS OF PROTEIN IN ONE GRANOLA BAR? Holy cow, what sort of utopian future are you living in? What does that even taste like? I kind of want to open it up with my whole family and have us all have a nibble, but I also want to keep it in the car forever next to my emergency sunflower seeds...

I don’t know if “<big>Chocolat: 64% Cacao</big> für feine Desserts <small>auch zum naschen</small>” is funny for real but I think it is.

POWER MALT POWER MALT MY FAVORITE! I hoarded the last one so hard I ate the last bites in the weeks before Christmas. I will try to do better with this trust. OH MY GOSH I WILL HAVE TO BECAUSE THERE ARE TWO OF THEM!

Wow this is. An immense load of chocolate. This is really impressive.

I’m not sure if the Ruweilfabriek tag is an intended part of this package but it is received and acknowledged. (Do you know the manufacturer Hirschmann? I keep explaining to techs how the H in their logo is a pun.) There’s also a mysterious suction thing that unscrews into two parts. I have dropped one on my computer. There may or may not be a decoder ring in your letter but I refuse to read it until I’ve been properly astounded and baffled by the rest of the items.

CHOCOLATE FROM GONDOR. (Giandor) MIT MANDELCREMEFÜLLUNG? Excellent, I love almonds! Hyacinth doesn’t like primary almond flavors so I get that one to myself :)

Zuckerfondantfüllung, interesting, I wasn’t aware fondant could be... more than technically edible. An experiment!

Mm, Haselnüssen. In den USA gibt’s fast keine Haselnüssen, stattdessen haben wir Erdnüsse, und deswegen ist es etwas besonderes, Haselnüssen zu finden, obwohl ich weiß dass sie in Europa genauso enttauschend wie Erdnüsse hier seien sind. Seien sind? Is that a real thing?

Tourist habe ich vorher gekriegt, das ist auch gut. Nicht für teilen mit dem Hund. Und Bärnerschoggi auch! Aber Cremant ist neu, meine ich. 55% ist aber fast nicht dunkel... hier, aber wir haben Herscheys. I’ve read entire books about why American chocolate is so terrible and it comes down to freakin’ wossisname Herschey deciding to ignore all existing knowledge about how to make chocolate and come up with his own process for - guess what! - an inferior type that tastes of candle wax. And yet Americans learned to eat it, despite knowing that European chocolate was better, which is why German and Swiss chocolates have such nice reputations, and somehow we’ve never replaced the godawful stuff.

[optional rant about chocolate being grown and native to very different parts of the world from where it’s famous for whoaaaaa it’s time to lie down again guess what guess what Patrick today I learned to clean sinks. not the sink part. the U-boat part. Which is not an U-Boot sondern. With pipes. Ye ken? Taken them apart to make the extra stinkyslime. For drainage purposes.]

Update: Hyacinth says thank you for the espresso chocolate, which I told him was his, and then I explained that you didn’t really send it at him because it’s coffee, and he said well tell him thank you anyway then maybe I will get more, and I said well I will certainly share the rest it’s about a kilogram of chocolate, and he said well tell him thank you anyway then maybe I will get more, so that’s Hyacinth for you, he says Thank you.

[ofdevastation]

( A SECOND CHANCE GRANTED IN A DARK TEMPLE WITH ONLY THE LIGHT OF THE MOON, REFLECTIONS IN SHATTERED GLASS, A CRESCENT SHAPED BLADE STAINED IN BLOOD )▸ welcome to latverion, MARC SPECTOR/STEVEN GRANT/JAKE LOCKLEY (MOON KNIGHT/MR. KNIGHT). it’s time to be gracious, for in this vast multiverse, you have been saved by emperor doom. according to records you are 40 and use HE/HIM, THEY/THEM pronouns. emperor doom expects you’ll enjoy your career as BATTLE CHAMPION/MUSEUM TOUR GUIDE/DRIVER, or else. excellent. we look forward to your contribution. 

ABOUT BASICS

FULL NAME: marc spector ( steven grant & jake lockley ) ALIAS: moon knight, mr. knight AGE: 40 AFFILIATIONS: solo ( khonsu ), midnight mission, midnight sons GENDER AND PRONOUNS: cis man and he/him, they/them (when in reference to the system) FACE CLAIM: oscar isaac

IN-DEPTH ANALYSIS

POINT OF ORIGIN: mcu with comic influence. post moon knight season 1 finale with aspects of the comics brought in where fitting

ABILITIES/SKILLS: espionage (marc), weapons expert, marksmanship, multilingualism (marc and jake), history/mythology expert (steven) hand to hand combat, multilingualism, divine empowerment from khonsu - suit summoning, enhanced strength, durability, agility/speed, regenerative healing factor/immortality, weapon summoning, various other abilities with khonsu’s aide (all)

HAVE THEY BROUGHT ANY FAMILY OR PETS WITH THEM: while he didn’t necessarily bring anyone, he’s grateful to have layla here

ANY HEADCANONS YOU WANT OTHERS TO KNOW:

obviously, marc canonly has dissociative identity disorder, and works in a system with steven and jake. while i do my best to make sure that all aspects of this are represented accurately and respectfully, i’m always open to any (polite) constructive criticism and just ask that people come directly to me in regards to it. i also will do my best to ensure that any posts are tagged as necessary when it comes to potentially triggering material, just let me know if i miss anything!

upon arriving in latverion, marc and steven agreed to, grudgingly, work with khonsu again. they have more say now in how they operate and considerate it their best chance to keep people safe under the pretty sketchy circumstance.

marc and steven are at a point of understanding and accepting one another, though not always in perfect agreement, they’re doing their best. to pull some from the comics that the show hadn’t gotten to yet, they’re aware they have a third alter, and marc’s finally been able to communicate with jake to a degree, but as he doesn’t show up often, this is still limited. jake, on the other hand, is aware of marc and steven.

their history is a mix of both comics and the mcu, with keeping the traumatic events of their childhood from each, as they are vital to the character, but would only be referenced if absolutely necessary. (if you know, you know)

QUESTIONNAIRE

HOW DOES YOUR CHARACTER FEEL ABOUT EMPEROR DOOM?

all three of them don’t trust the situation, knowing any time one person puts themselves about anyone else, it can’t be good. yet what they want to do about it can vary. marc wants to make sure those around him are safe, regardless of what else it can mean - particularly layla and steven. steven, on the other hand, just wants to keep his head down and out of trouble unless something happens where they’d have to step in. and jake, well - no one knows what jake wants but they’re sure it can’t be good.

HOW DOES YOUR CHARACTER FEEL ABOUT THE BATTLES? ARE THEY TRYING TO AVOID THEM? OR ARE THEY EAGER TO JUMP IN?

marc is presently volunteering in battles. as far as he cares, it lets him see what others are capable of and it’s the one thing he knows he’s good at. steven would rather avoid it, and isn’t thrilled marc is doing it, but if he were forced to fight, he knows now he could - even though marc would more than likely front anyway.

WHY HAS YOUR CHARACTER ACCEPTED THEIR JOB POSITION? WILL THEY USE IT TO GET CLOSER TO DOOM? OR WILL THEY USE IT EXPLOIT HIM? OR DO THEY SIMPLY LIKE THEIR JOB?

steven is thrilled to be at the museum, and without the terrible boss he had back home. he takes a lot of time to educate others and usually rants a bit too long with a ridiculous amount of passion for history. marc and jake are both using their current positions to observe and learn what they can about the other people here.

[hanjisungs-bigtittyg0thgf]

Hatefuck

You’re fucking infuriating

bully!wooyoung x female reader

Trigger warnings: bullying

Content warnings: hair pulling, biting, pinning, marking, hitting (i’d probably slap the shit out of him too if he planted one on me like that out of nowhere just as a reflex lmao), degradation, spanking, manhandling, names (sweet cheeks, princess, babydoll, sweetheart, kitten, baby girl, whore, slut, bitch directed at wooyoung lmao), unprotected sex (just realized i forgot to tag this the last few times, anyways, wrap it before you tap it folks even if you are gonna be a glazed donut instead of a twinkie), we’re really just going hard here and i would pay good money for him to actually do this shit to me.

Summary: what happens when you’re stuck in a group project with the man you despise most?

Word count: 4991

A/N: soooooo this is actually a miniseries because after i wrote this part i couldn’t stop thinking about it. i’m going to release other works in between each part of this one just to mix it up a little but i’m currently working on part four and depending on how that one goes, i may have a fifth part. anyways, follow me here for new content every few days and consider turning on post notifications to get updates as soon as i drop something new! i’ve got a nice little library for you guys <3

Smut below the cut

<-Previous | Next->

Jung Wooyoung. Local heartthrob and resident hottie. More like resident pain in your ass. The two of you were in several of the same classes. You shared a major and you both started college at the same time. You were both excellent students, all the professors adored both of you. But that’s where the similarities ended.

 He was popular with both the men and women on campus and it seemed to have gotten to his head. He’d pursued you at one point but after you rejected him it seemed he made it his life mission to create as much difficulty for you as possible. He was fucking insufferable. If there was an opportunity to irritate you or make you look like a fucking idiot in front of everyone, he took it.

 This was why you were currently scrambling to gather all your things from the floor as your classmates filed out of the room. Wooyoung was stood at the front of the lecture hall chatting with the professor after he’d “accidentally” kicked your bag over on his way by. You’d been putting up with this for almost two years now and you were on the verge of changing majors just to avoid him.

 It didn’t take long for you to shove your shit back in your bag, there wasn’t much there anyways. Once your bag was packed up, you started for the door, making sure to leave as wide a berth as possible when you passed Wooyoung. You wouldn’t put it past him to trip you. You immediately made your way to the library, heading down to the basement level after grabbing a coffee from the shop on the main floor.

 You skimmed the titles as you sipped on your coffee, which was admittedly just a caramel milkshake with espresso. You were currently searching for a particular book on Taoism and the ancient legends surrounding it. The other side of this room was full of legal documents but you were far more interested in the world religions section. It had nothing to do with your studies as an info tech major, you just found this sort of thing interesting.

 Your eyes lit up when you spotted the book you were looking for and you quickly snagged it from the shelf before heading off to one of the study desks on the far wall. This floor being underground meant it was perfect for a silent study area. There were red signs throughout the room that indicated this floor was meant to be entirely silent. For the most part, it was, save for the elevator dinging to announce the arrival and departure of various patrons.

 You chose a desk that allowed you to see all the way to the far side of the room. You had a clear view of the elevator too. That’s why you chose this particular seat. You had a habit of making sure you could see exits and keeping your back to walls so no one could sneak up behind you. You hated not seeing what was coming.

 You occasionally looked up from your book as people entered and exited the elevator. At one point, you saw two men in black suits walking towards the legal documents section. They were carrying briefcases. You wondered if they were part of the secret service or something. You settled back in a moment after they disappeared around a corner, lost in the Taoist creation story. Getting lost in a book was fun. Until it wasn’t.

 You jumped as the book was plucked from your hands, not realizing anyone had approached you. Your face quickly fell from shock to dismay upon seeing Wooyoung standing over you with a smug grin. “I was looking for this.” He whispered, starting to turn as he snapped the book shut.

 You jumped up and slapped his shoulder. “I was reading that, asshole!” You whispered back, reaching for the book when he turned back towards you. He held it out of your reach, which wasn’t hard to do since he had a good six inches on you and the wingspan of a fucking vulture. How fitting.

 “I want to read it.” He shrugged before leaning over you with a nasty smirk, hiding the book behind his back. You shrunk away from him, your face screwing up in disgust. “Naughty girl. Don’t you know it’s rude to hit people? Run along, class starts soon.” Even his whispering voice made you want to knock his teeth in.

 You rolled your eyes as you grabbed your things and shoved by him, making sure to slam into him with your shoulder. “Asshole.” You spat under your breath. You couldn’t even get a break to read between classes without that douche coming to bother you. You chewed on your straw as the elevator took you back to the main floor, the sounds of blenders and foot traffic greeting you as the doors slid open. Sometimes you hated how lively the main floor was. As you entered the building where your next class was held, you dropped your empty coffee cup into the trash and pulled your phone out of your pocket as a text came in.

 Bastard: Thanks for the book, sweet cheeks.

 What a bitch. You wanted to block his number but you were in a group with him this semester. You rolled your eyes and took a deep breath before entering the lecture hall and dropping yourself in a seat at the back. Your anxiety didn’t let you sit down front.

 It was a few minutes later when you felt a hand on your shoulder, making you jump. Class was about to start and every seat but the one beside you was full. “Move your feet.” You frowned as the voice met your ears before you could even look to see who it was. You let out a sigh and shifted in your seat so he could pass. He plopped down next to you and spoke again before you could make a snide remark. “The guys want to you to come over tonight to work on the project.”

 He was referring to the programming project for your next class. You were in a group with him, Yunho, San, Seonghwa, and Jongho. They were all best friends, you were the only outsider in the group, though they were trying to bring you into the fold. They shared a house just off campus with three other guys. They were all really nice the last time you were over. Wooyoung was the only downside of being in this group.

 “What time?” You asked with a sigh. It couldn’t be avoided any further, this module was due in a week. You’d been telling them you had work or other commitments for the last two weeks just to avoid seeing Wooyoung outside of class but there was no time for that now. “I have class until four.” Luckily you’d get a break from seeing the bane of your existence before having to head straight into the snake pit.

 “Seven. Don’t be late.”

  ————————————

  Class had gone surprisingly smoothly, all things considered. He kept elbowing you while you took notes, making you leave lines all throughout, but he didn’t dump your bag this time. Honestly, if he wasn’t doing it with malicious intent, you probably wouldn’t mind him. You likely could’ve been friends with him if he hadn’t asked you out and taken it so hard when you said no.

 Your afternoon class was uneventful, thankfully, and you’d managed to get a little shopping done afterwards. You wanted to cook before you left but you didn’t have time between running errands and doing homework. Plus, Seonghwa had sent you a text telling you he was making dinner and he wanted you to eat with them. You’d just pulled up to their house when your phone buzzed.

 Bastard: What’s taking so damn long, princess?

 You rolled your eyes as you shut off your car and got out, shouldering your bag. You locked the car and made your way up the walkway from the private driveway. You were thankful you didn’t have to deal with street parking here. It made you anxious.

 You rang the doorbell and the door swung open instantly, revealing an irritated Wooyoung. “What have I said about the names?” You frowned as you pushed past him, toeing your shoes off beside everyone else’s and dropping your bag by the line of shoes. The smell of the food made you smile as you walked further in.

 “I don’t give a shit what you said. I told you to be here at seven.” The door closed behind you, almost slamming. You heard him fiddling with the lock and looked over your shoulder, making a face at him in response to his words.

 “I was. Stop being a bitch.” You tossed over your shoulder as you made your way to the kitchen. Hongjoong was helping Seonghwa with dinner and you instantly felt at ease. “Joongie, Wooyoung’s bullying me again.” You pouted.

 Hongjoong had spotted you wiping tears outside the library a few weeks ago and wanted to cheer you up. You hadn’t meant to open up but he insisted he wanted to help you feel better and he wasn’t very happy when he found out that Wooyoung was the reason you were crying. He was protective that way. He’d told you to come to him if Wooyoung caused anymore trouble and you’d been keeping to yourself about it but if you had to spend extra time with the man that made you wanna claw your eyes out then you’d let someone else make him act civil. Hongjoong was the only one he’d listen to.

 You wanted to keep a distance from all of them because you knew they were a package deal and you didn’t want to deal with Wooyoung more than you had to but they all seemed to want to get close to you. Jongho had even taken to calling you noona. It was hard to shut all of them out when they were so nice. Again, Wooyoung was the only downside. So you’d let them in a little but you still felt extremely out of place.

 “Woo, leave the poor girl alone or I’ll hit you again.” Hongjoong’s threat was followed by him lifting the wooden spoon he was holding and jerking towards Wooyoung like he was about to chase after him. This was met with the usual coy smile and half-assed denial of his wrongdoings.

 “Okay, that’s enough of that.” Seonghwa cut in before Hongjoong and Wooyoung could start bickering. “Woo, go get the others.” He left immediately, knowing it was best not to argue back. “Y/n would you mind giving me a hand with setting the table?” You nodded and gave him a little smile.

 You made yourself busy with laying out dinnerware while Seonghwa and Hongjoong took all the food to the table. Everyone filed in and the room was suddenly deafeningly loud as all the men took their seats. “Y/n, sit with me and Yunho!” Mingi urged, patting the seat between them. You gave a small smile and sat between them, feeling dwarfed. Wooyoung was directly across from you and he had a devilish gleam in his eye.

 Though you didn’t join in, the chatter continued all throughout dinner. They tried to get you involved but you weren’t very talkative at the moment. Wooyoung’s feet kept poking at yours and occasionally kicking your shins under the table. You were getting fed up. Luckily, everyone began to clear their spots and soon you were left with only your group. You quickly retrieved your bag and the six of you started working.

 Wooyoung was extremely smart and he looked good when he wasn’t talking. Rather, he looked good when he wasn’t talking shit. When he was joining in on a lively conversation and cracking jokes or when he was telling a story, he looked good. Again, you could’ve been friends if he hadn’t been so upset by you not wanting to date him. Maybe you would’ve developed a crush on him even. You might still if he keeps showing you this side of himself…

 He had excellent ideas. In fact, the basis of this project was his idea. You were given parameters for the project but the professor had given you free reign inside those parameters and Wooyoung’s idea had been the best. Everyone was excited to make a game the second he mentioned it so that’s what you were doing. You’d already put together the game pieces, now you needed to make them move. The work went relatively quickly with everyone doing a specific part.

 “I think that’s it for this section. And I can type up the paper to go with it and submit everything.” Seonghwa hummed as everyone began to put their things away after two hours of working. “Thank you for having dinner with us, y/n.” He said with a warm smile as he stood.

 “Thank you for having me, Hwa.” You beamed up at him and he nodded before heading out of the room. Yunho and San offered their goodbyes and left while bickering about what game they were going to play before bed. Jongho was reluctant to leave but ultimately went back to his room after giving you a hug and telling you goodnight.

 Alone with Wooyoung, he returned to his usual spiteful self. Well. That was the Wooyoung you knew anyways. He wasn’t spiteful with anyone else. “Try and make it less obvious that you wanna fuck my friends.” He spat and you looked at him in confusion as you stood, slinging your bag over your shoulder. “The way you look at Seonghwa hyung gives me the creeps.”

 “And what way do I look at him?” You frowned. “That’s literally just my face. You’re just not fortunate enough to see me in a good mood so you never get to witness me smiling and being nice.” You shrugged and made your way to the door. “Although I understand that seeing people happy is a foreign thing for you.” You mocked.

 “I see plenty of people happy. I just don’t like seeing you happy. And I especially don’t like seeing you happy with my friends.” He followed you, watching as you pulled your shoes on.

 “I didn’t ask what you like.” You said flatly as you braced yourself against the wall to fix your shoe. “If you have a problem with us being friends, go talk to them about it. It wouldn’t be the first time you’ve ruined something for me.” Before he could say anything else, you flashed him a fake smile and stood straight. “Goodnight.” You said before heading out the door and straight to your car. You got in and took a steadying breath, fighting back the irritation you felt as you started for your apartment.

 Ten minutes later, you were walking in your front door and kicking off your shoes. You shuffled off to your room and dropped your bag on your desk before dropping yourself unceremoniously onto your bed. You were exhausted. You didn’t have the energy for Wooyoung anymore. You’d simply have to ignore him instead of arguing back.

 You were dragged back to reality when you heard someone banging on the door. What the hell? It was almost ten and you didn’t have many friends. The ones you did have wouldn’t just drop by. You got up from the bed and cautiously made your way to the front door, fear filling your body with every loud knock. You lifted the cover and peered out the peephole only to let out a whine of frustration. “Did you fucking follow me?” You practically shouted as you flung the door open.

 “What of it?” He shoved past you into your apartment and you groaned as you shut the door. “Drink with me.” You looked at him full of confusion and irritation. He had the nerve to bicker at his house then follow you to yours and demand you drink with him?

 “I don’t drink.”

 “Stop lying. I asked you out at a bar.” He rolled his eyes and went to your kitchen, where your liquor was clearly displayed on the counter. “We need to talk and I need to get drunk.”

 “No, we most definitely do not need to talk. I don’t want to have any sort of conversation outside of what’s necessary for class. Not after everything you’ve done to me.”

 “Stop-“ he tried to interject.

 “No. I’m not done yet. You’re a spoiled brat who can’t handle being told no and you’ve made my life hell the last two years. You’ve chased off a few friends, you’ve pulled petty shit like a middle schooler, and now you’re bitching that your friends like me. All because I said I wouldn’t wet your dick.” You scoffed and crossed your arms. “And then you follow me home? I can’t have anything, I swear.”

 You didn’t notice him stalking back across the room towards you until he was right in front of you. His large hands held your head in place as he crashed his lips to yours and you stood frozen for only a second before beginning to wail on his chest with your fists. What right did he have to come into your house without your permission and then plant one on you? Even if he was attractive - and he was, there’s no denying that fact - he had absolutely no right to touch you.

 He released you only after he’d bitten your lip a few times, his teeth pulling your lip when he backed away. You were furious despite the way your body reacted to what he’d done. It’d been a long time since you were kissed like that and you couldn’t help how worked up you felt. “Get the fuck out of my house. Now.” You seethed through gritted teeth.

 He only smirked as he strolled towards the door like nothing happened. “I’ll be back soon, babydoll.” It was a threat.

  ————————————

  It had been two days since Wooyoung had followed you home. You, unfortunately, couldn’t stop thinking about how nice his lips felt and it only served to further piss you off. You were sat in your last class of the day, a night class set to end at 8:15, when your phone buzzed with a message from the devil himself.

 Bastard: I’m coming over tonight. If the door doesn’t open at exactly nine, I’ll force my way in.

 You: No the fuck you won’t. I don’t want you anywhere near me.

 Bastard: I know that’s a lie, sweetheart. I saw you staring at my lips earlier.

 You: I was watching the shit spew out of your mouth.

 Bastard: Ouch. Retract the claws, kitten. I might cry.

 You: Good. Leave me alone. Do NOT show up at my house tonight or I WILL be calling Hongjoong on your ass.

 You locked your phone and dropped it in your bag, refusing to entertain him further. You only had fifteen minutes left of class and you didn’t want it to end. You knew he’d be at your door even though you told him to leave you alone. He never listened.

 Time seemed to mock you, flying by as if it knew you dreaded what would be waiting for you. All too soon, you were parking your car. You walked up the stairs, your legs feeling heavy. It was 8:59. You frowned when you saw him standing at your door, poised to knock. He turned when he heard your footsteps. “I told you not to come.” You pulled your phone out and pulled up your call log, set on finding Hongjoong’s number, when he plucked the device from your hand along with your keys.

 “And I told you I don’t care.” He hummed as he turned to unlock your door. You slapped his shoulder much harder than you ever had before but he opened your door and walked inside. “Stop hitting me. I’ll call the police.”

 “And tell them what? That I hit you because you broke into my house?” You both kicked your shoes off despite your demand that he leave.

 “Can you stop being so goddamn stubborn?” He boomed and you flinched at his volume. “I told you. We need to talk.”

 “Yeah and then you fucking kissed me!”

 “And you fucking liked it.” He smirked, stepping far too close to you. His hands on your hips didn’t allow you to move away. “You haven’t been able to stop thinking about it, have you? You keep staring at me in class. You’re already worked up from me being this close.”

 “I hate you.”

 “You hate that I’m right.”

 “No. I hate you, Jung Wooyoung. I have never hated anyone as much as I hate you.” Your voice had lost its bite despite the amount of venom you were so desperately trying to fill your words with. Your chest heaved with your labored breaths and your heartbeat thrummed in your ears as you tried to lean away from him.

 “Unbelievable.” He groaned before his lips crashed to yours just like two nights ago. It was a bruising kiss. Your fists didn’t beat against his chest this time. Instead, they gripped his shirt tightly and rested against his chest. He was firm under your touch.

 You didn’t fight back even as he guided you towards your room. You didn’t know how he knew which room was your bedroom and you didn’t care. You needed to be fucked senseless. He could give you that. You’d seen him dance before, his hips were fucking amazing.

 The two of you stumbled along, desperately tugging at each other’s clothes and scattering them along the way. The both of you were left only in your underwear by the time you reached the bed. The backs of your legs met the mattress and you almost fell back but he snaked his arms around your waist, burying his face in your neck. You didn’t want him to leave a visible mark. They’d know what you did if he did that. But that seemed to be his goal.

 “Everyone on campus is gonna see these marks and they’re gonna wonder who did this. Your precious ‘Hwa’ is gonna see and realize you couldn’t wait for him to come around. You’re gonna look in the mirror and know the person you hate the most is the best fuck you’ve ever had. You’ll think about how much better I am every time you sleep with someone else. If you sleep with anyone else after this.” Seonghwa wasn’t even a romantic interest for you but clearly Wooyoung felt otherwise.

 You wanted to hit him. You wanted to hit him and kick his shins and bite him. You wanted to fight this man. And your body moved on autopilot, fists beating down on his chest and shoulders even as he bit your neck and drew out a pathetic moan. “I thought I told you to stop hitting me, kitten.”

 You couldn’t get a word in before he shoved you down on the bed and crawled over you, his hand grabbing a fistful of hair at the top of your head to hold you in place as he got in your face. “You never listen.” The rough treatment was turning you on further, your panties growing uncomfortably wet.

 He released your hair and pinned your hands on either side of your head when you tried to hit him again. He paused for a moment once he had you still and it almost felt like he was admiring how you looked beneath him. The spell was quickly broken by you lunging forward and sinking your teeth into his shoulder. The sound he let out was glorious but you didn’t get a chance to drag out another before he was sitting up, his hand wrapped around your throat.

 You gave an ornery smirk before he began to squeeze and your eyes rolled back in pleasure. “You like being treated like this, whore? You like being manhandled and used like the slut you are?” You let out a weak whimper and held onto his arm as he leaned back down and caught your lips in another blistering kiss.

 Your nails dug crescent moons into his skin as his teeth caught your bottom lip. You were sure you’d have bruises everywhere by morning and you were going to see to it that he was in the same state as you. His teeth slowly released your lip as he pulled back, his face only an inch away from yours when he broke the kiss. His grip on your throat loosened and the black spots that had begun to swim in your vision quickly vanished as you both gasped for air.

 You wanted to piss him off. You wanted him to get so frustrated with you that he made you a rag doll for his pleasure. So you released his arm and grabbed a fistful of his long black hair, pulling his head back. You knew he wouldn’t take kindly to receiving the same treatment he was giving you. “Stop fucking playing with me.”

 His expression wasn’t what you expected, his lips curling into a smirk as he let out a low groan. “But it’s so fun, babydoll.” The name irked you and you found yourself beating on his chest once again but it didn’t take him long to pin your hands like before. “What did I fucking tell you?” He spat, his jaw ticking in annoyance.

 “I don’t care. I told you to stop with the names.” You struggled to free yourself but he didn’t let go. “I’ll stop being a bitch when you stop pissing me off.” You felt his grip letting up and prepared to wail on him again but in the next moment you were on your stomach.

 Your panties slid down your legs and his large hands lifted your hips, positioning you how he wanted so he could fuck you from behind. But he didn’t. Instead, he slapped your ass. Hard. You jolted forwards and let out a loud whimper before he dragged you back into position. This repeated a few times before his hands left your body entirely. You were about to protest when he shoved his dick in you. Finally. “You’re fucking infuriating.” He groaned as you wiggled your hips, shimmying yourself further down on his cock.

 “Yet here we are.” Your voice was almost a whisper as he bottomed out. He didn’t start slow, he immediately set an unforgiving pace and you let out a series of pathetic moans. You tried to prop yourself up on your elbows but he paused and pulled your hands behind your back, holding them in place with one hand while the other slapped your ass again before resting on your hip.

 His fingers dug into your hip, his grip growing tighter by the second as he drove you into the mattress. It hurt but you welcomed the pain. You needed to unwind and be used. The sound of skin slapping skin filled the room, mingling with your whines and his groans. You could feel the coil in your belly winding tighter with every thrust.

 His hand suddenly moved from your hip and you wanted to lament the loss of contact. It didn’t last long though. His hand tangled in your hair, pulling you up by your head. His grip on your wrists meant your back was arched while he pulled your head back to his shoulder. The new angle made you see stars.

 His head dipped down and he began to bite and suck on your neck, leaving more hickeys. You’d kill him for those. He bit down on a particularly sensitive area and you let out a soft cry, clenching around him. He hissed at that and licked the shell of your ear.

 You were surprised when he allowed you to turn your head but you quickly took the chance to nip at his jaw. His grip on your hair tightened, pulling harder, and you shuddered. You couldn’t take it anymore. He was too good at this. “Woo- ah fuck ‘m gonna cum-“

 You barely got the sentence out before wave after wave of white-hot pleasure washed over you. Your moans were quickly muffled when he pushed you back down into the sheets, his hand holding your head in place as he chased his own high. A moment later, you lost all contact with him as he came on your ass, one hand finishing himself off while the other hung at his side.

 You wanted to whine. You wanted to curse him for barging into your home and fucking you dumb. You wanted to slap the shit out of yourself for wanting aftercare. But most of all, you wanted to cry. You knew things would return to normal tomorrow, his bullying would resume and he’d have even more ammunition. He knew exactly how to get under your skin and you were sure he’d tell everyone he knew how he fucked you senseless even after you claimed to hate each other. People would know.

 You allowed yourself to collapse on the bed, curling up as you tried to catch your breath. You could hear him moving around the room, likely gathering his clothes. A moment later, you felt his hand on your thigh, slapping the sensitive skin there. “See you in class, baby girl.”

 Then you were alone, left only in a bra and regretting every choice you made that led up to the events that had just transpired. You could hear his footsteps as he left your room. You heard him stop to put his shoes on and then the door opened and closed. You were well and truly fucked. The rest of the semester was going to be hell.

[clairecrive]

Hi could we please get a really angsty fic with nikolai (with a happy ending pls) where reader and he has had a fight so they maintain the facade on the outside bc they're royals but in private it's just ignoring each other/angst?

Young Royals

A/N: ahh, this is angsty alright but it seems I'm only capable of writing hurt/comfort lately. This took a life of its own and it's long af but I hope you like it anyway x

Warnings: miscommunication, angst, fighting, hurt/comfort, Nikolai is a bit absent, you're a bit jealous of his relationship with Zoya

Tags: @jupiterandbutterflies, @agentsofsheilds , @for-bebbanburg , @randomoutsiders , @pansysgirlfriend , @hannaxmaria , @vintagebitc , @story-scribbler , @crowssixof , @odetostep,@lizzie-he4rts, @korol-lantsov, @subjecta13-thefangirl, @gallysonegoodlung, @a-c-lee, @mriddlemethis, @carnationworld,@thanossexual, @luvxginger, @sanna2020,@partiesandblurrypolaroids, @edithsvoice, @wafflesandschemingfaces (tag list form)

SHADOW AND BONE MASTERLIST

"Do not put words into my mouth, Nikolai."

"Please, you already have so many, my love," he scoffed and the use of the term of endearment hurt the most.

"You're making me sound like a brat while I'm providing you with a viable solution," you insisted with a flare of your hands, frustrated by his unwillingness to listen to you.

"No, you're not. What you're doing is being childish."

"I'm your queen, Nikolai. I'm only asking to be more involved."

"You're my wife, y/n, and you know nothing about politics or running a country." He retired, putting emphasis on wife. This felt a lot like being put into place. And the fact that it was your husband doing so, hurt. It was also the most you had seen him this week.

"Neither did Zoya, nor Genya or anyone who's currently running the country."

"That's different and you know it."

"Only because you're making it so," you exclaimed finally exploding. His despondency got on your nerves and this conversation was going nowhere anyway.

Surprised by your raise of voice, Nikolai stood before you just blinking at you.

Sighing, you took a step toward him, holding your hands up, "look, you're right, I don't know about running a country but teach me. I'm not stupid, I'll pick it up."

"Why are you insisting so much? You've never shown any interest in politics before." He gave you a puzzled look like he didn't really believe your intentions.

"I've never wanted to be queen before." before meeting you.

"Ah, I see," he chuckled mirthlessly, "I put you in this situation and now you're taking your revenge."

To insinuate that your marriage with him was you "being put into a situation" rather than a consensual decision you had made out of love was absurd.

Nikolai was right. You had never cared about politics or diplomacy before meeting him. You were a soldier. There was no reason for you to meddle with something that didn't concern you.

But now you were queen and you felt a responsibility towards your people. You wanted to help but so far, Nikolai hadn't allowed you to take part in any meetings. He said that anyone who needed to be there was already involved. What he didn't tell you was that while Grisha made excellent soldiers and even good councillors, one of them being a royal was a very different matter.

He had indulged his love for you by marrying you. You were his vice and he simply couldn't accept the idea of being without you anymore. He had married you, consequently making you queen, going against what his advisors told him.

While he ignored his warnings he was painfully aware, however, how difficult it was going to be for a Grisha on the throne. It was the first time something liked this had ever happened and unfortunately, the country was filled with people who resented Grisha for their powers.

Nikolai feared that the people were never going to accept you. Hence why he'd been keeping you secluded in the palace.

To be fair, you were doing a wonderful job. Like he had pointed out, you were not accustomed to politics but you made up for that with empathy and kindness. You started to interest yourself with the problem of poverty and lack of provisions for some parts of the country.

And while no one was aware of it, Nikolai often turned to you for military strategy. You were an apt soldier and had fought bravely alongside him and everyone else in the battle of the Fold. You were the very reason why he was still alive, to be honest.

While this arrangement worked for the first months of your reign, it was starting to feel an inadequate effort. You needed to do more, you wanted to do more. You didn't expect Nikolai to oppose it so vehemently.

"If I didn't want to be here I wouldn't be, Nikolai, you'd do well to remember it," you pointed out coldly, straightening your spine.

"Since you seem so adverse at spending time with me or including me in important matters, I'll find someone else who will." And with that, chin held high, you walked out of the room.

You missed him. It felt absurd to say this but you missed your husband. He was always busy with meetings or official visits to some noble across the country. For most of them, he went alone or with Zoya.

You knew that she was his first in command but you couldn't help but be bothered by it. It was one thing to accept the fact that he hadn't given the role to you "because the queen cannot have that role as well", it was a whole other thing to accept the fact that another woman spent more time with your husband than you did.

Countless were the fights you had with him in this regard. But they were pointless. Nikolai was still set on not bringing you and he and Zoya were always found together.

You didn't know what hurt more. The blow at your pride for being denied a position you deserved because of who you loved, the jealousy or being punished for your identity.

One thing was sure though, it was getting too much. At first, you pulled thought for Nikolai but now that you didn't have him anymore, your efforts seemed to be in vain.

So, like you had told Nikolai, you looked for someone who was willing to teach you. You wanted to help and if Nikolai wasn't going to let you here at the palace, then you'd find somewhere else.

Count Kirigin had always been nice to you and he was a very generous host. You knew that he played a central role in Nikolai's plan so you thought that there was no one better than him.

You reached out to him, wrote him a letter in which you showed interest in his activity and asked him if he was willing to show you. Of course, anything that came from the queen or the king couldn't be denied but you knew that the Count truly enjoyed your company. If your position didn't put so much higher than everybody else, you'd even consider him a friend.

You waited for his reply before putting in motion the preparations for your departure.

In the meantime, you and Nikolai kept conducting your separate lives. Usually, you'd only see him at night when he returned to your chambers if you were still up. Now, you had decided to sleep in separate rooms too.

If he wanted a wife, then a wife he'd get. But kings and queens do not sleep together.

If the new arrangement was bothering him, you didn't know. He hadn't reached out to you nor made any move to rectify your decision.

Turns out that he wasn't even at the Palace. He had left for a mission near the border with Shu Han and wouldn't be back for at least a week. Well, then. Of course, he didn't even bother with telling you. Not even a small note.

Jokes on him though, you thought, since when he was going to come back, he'd finally get what he wanted. You weren't going to be there to bother him anymore.

Differently from him though, you did indeed left him a note. Nikolai found it a week after you had set it on his pillow. Its presence made him furrow his eyebrows since he had already been wondering where you were. You usually came out to meet him at the gates whenever he'd come back from a mission and even though you had fought before he went away, you weren't one for holding grudges. So e guessed there was something holding you.

Unfolding the paper he was met with your familiar chaotic writing.

"I don't know when you're going to find this letter but if I'm not there yet it means that I'm still at Count Kirigin's. Do not bother with writing or visiting, I'll come back when my business with him is done.

Y/n"

What in the name of every sweet loving saint???

The letter wasn't dated, no dear, no yours no nothing. Fuck. You were still mad or worse, hurt.

Asking one of the servants, he learned that you had been away for a week already. But what business could you possibly have with the Count??

Nikolai had nothing against him. Seeing Kirigin get all flustered as he tried to flirt with Zoya amused him to no end but the idea of him and you in the same house? Alone?? Unacceptable.

Not even bothering to change clothes after his long journey, Nikolai headed to the stables to ask for a well-rested horse. Luckily, Count Kirigin's estate was not too far away. A couple of hours ride.

Turns out that the Count had a lot to teach. Despite his aloof reputation and extravagant clothes, he was very observant. He lacked ambition, which was why Nikolai trusted him and had a curious way of behaving in social situations.

But Emil had been born and raised in high society. He knew how things were run even if he had no desire to be in charge of them.

So far, you'd be having a wonderful time. Emil was a wonderful host, as you remembered, but without Nikolai's presence, he was even more extravagant. He had an unexpectedly dry sense of humour and a never-ending list of jokes.

Being in the open and in the company of someone who saw y/n instead of the Queen of Ravka proved to be even more needed than you thought. You felt reinvigorated and much lighter than you'd ever been.

You had also been learning a lot. Emil had been teaching you about diplomacy. About the best ways of formulating a sentence so that you wouldn't offend anyone but still get what you wanted. He had also been talking to you about your husband's ministers. About their weaknesses and vices and what was the best way to approach them to get what you wanted.

So far, it was proving to be a wonderful decision to come here.

Whenever your mind strayed on Nikolai, you willed it to focus on something else. You didn't know if he had already come home or seen the letter. A part of you thought that if he had, he would at least write one back. But the thought felt a lot like hope and seeing as how little he saw you even before you left, you didn't think it safe to harbour it.

When Nikolai reached the estate, he was met with Kirigin's servants. They welcomed him inside and profusely apologised for the Count's absence. They told him that at this time of the day, Kirigin and his guest would usually go out on a ride but that they were also about to return.

So Nikolai waited, sitting in the most comfortable chair the Count owned, fuming at the thought that his wife had felt the need to go away and be in the company of another man.

"If I didn't want to be here, I wouldn't be Nikolai. You'd do well to remember it."

Your words haunted him. They were the last thing that you told him. How stupid had he been to let you walk away. How utterly careless of him to disregard you like that.

He had promised himself to truly talk to you about it once this pressing matter of state was taken care of. Apparently, he had waited too long.

But Nikolai knew that the problem was at the source. He noticed how hurt you had been when he made Zoya his first in command. Or how sad you seemed everywhere he went somewhere with her and didn't ask you to join.

He was doing so to protect you from the inevitable slander you'd be met with. He should have known though that putting you aside was going to be even worse. You were a fighter just as much as Zoya was, if not stronger.

She hid behind her veil of indifference and superiority while you had never lost that emphatic verve that made everyone love you so much. In his attempt to make you safe, he had only managed to hurt you.

You were a warrior. You had accepted the role of queen only because it was the only way for you to be with Nikolai. And instead of praising you by making you a warrior queen, he had decided to hide you away.

Well, no more.

If his mistakes had not ruined everything already, he was going to make everything better.

Lost in his musing, he didn't hear the sound of hooves approaching but he did indeed hear your laugh. It immediately brought him back to the present and a wave of ugly jealousy hit him.

He couldn't remember the last time he made you laugh.

"I shouldn't even laugh Emil, the joke was terrible," Nikolai hear you giggling from somewhere in the hall. So now he was Emil, huh.

"You know you can't resist my charm, your highness," Emil replied and Nikolai had to call on every bit of his self-control to not barge out of the room and punch him.

"Stop it, you know you can call me y/n."

Before Emil could reply, they had both made it to the sitting room where Nikolai was waiting for them. It looked like no one had warned them of his presence because Kirigin looked surprised then utterly mortified.

"Your majesty, I wasn't aware you were here. Please forgive me for making you wait."

"Don't fret Kirigin, it was an impromptu visit. I came to see how my lovely wife was doing." No matter how green he was feeling right now, he knew that Kirigin was loyal to him and the crown. Whatever was happening here wasn't one of his schemes.

"Of course! I'm going to send for some tea while you two get reunited." Kirigin quickly bowed before hurrying out of the room.

Nikolai met your eyes for the first time since you had arrived. If at first, you were surprised to see him, now you couldn't help but be a bit sceptical about this visit.

"What are you doing here?" you asked breaking the ice.

"You leave with only a few lines on where you're going and you expect me to just accept it?" He scoffed, his hands curling on the armrests of the chair.

"It's more than what you gave me," you quipped, crossing your arms on your chest.

Nikolai sighed while his gloved hands run through his hair. You were right and he knew it. He had been a horrible husband lately.

"I know you're mad at me, honey, but listen-"

"I'm not mad. You didn't want to give me what I wanted so I went looking for it somewhere else." Scrolling your shoulders, you interrupted him without meeting his eyes. A list of excuses was not what you wanted nor what you needed from him.

Nikolai didn't miss the innuendo. His jaw clenched, his hands closed in fists. But he willed himself to stay calm.

"You think Kirigin can give you something that I can't?" Nikolai was a master in diplomacy. Never did he get frustrated or angry or raised his voice, even with the most aggravating people. Here though, with you, he didn't have to keep a façade. He spoke through his teeth barely containing his anger.

"Well, so far, he's been giving me attention and interesting pointers that no, Nikolai, you refused to give me."

"So this is how you solve your problems? Running away in the countryside with Emil?" Nikolai sneered, his tone souring around Kirigin's name.

"Don't you do the same with your precious first in command?" Tired after your ride with Emil, you plopped down on the chair in front of Nikolai's. Completely ignoring his tone, you pointed out calmly. The perfect image of aloofness even when it was the last thing you were in this moment.

"That's different," he snapped trying to meet your eyes that were carefully analyzing your hands.

"Yes," you signed, "it seems that when I'm concerned everything is different."

"There's nothing between me and Zoya, y/n and you know it." Nikolai was getting more frustrated by the second. He came here to apologize, to make things right and so far, the conversation was going in the opposite directions.

"Maybe now, but you spend more time with her than you do with me. It's only a matter of time before it happens and you're sorely mistaken if you think I'll just stand by and watch."

"This is not about Zoya," he insisted but so far, he wasn't getting the reaction out of you he wanted. You seemed... resigned at the situation. And that worried Nikolai to no end.

"It never is."

"Why did you run away?" Opting for a more direct approach, he bit the bullet and went straight to the point.

"I did not run away," you scoffed in contempt at his choice of words, "I told you I wanted to do more and Emil is teaching me. Not everyone is so against spending time with me, you know." You shot him a glance.

It was the first time that you had looked at him since you had been left alone.

"I married you, y/n. How can you possibly believe I don't want to spend time with you?" As desperation slipped through his words, Nikolai leaned towards you in his seat. As if he couldn't bear the distance between you anymore. But you knew it wasn't that. You and he had been distant for months now.

"Because that's what's happening, Nikolai," you clipped back and Nikolai had to refrain from wincing at your tone.

"It's not intentional, my love, I've just been busy." His tone softened. It was a poor excuse of an apology but it was sadly the truth.

"But when I say that I want to join or help you with it you strongly oppose?" Again, there was that suspicious implication in your words that Nikolai just couldn't stand. To think that you believed he'd ever cheat on you with another woman when he had done so much, taken so many risks, to be with you.

"It's not what you think, y/n." He insisted again but immediately realized he had said the wrong thing when he saw you leaning back into your chair shaking your head.

"I don't think anything, anymore. Do whatever you want. You do your thing and I'll do mine. I won't be a bother to you anymore." Holding up your hands, you gestured as you spoke.

A beat. Nikolai froze in his seat at what you were suggesting.

"You're never a bother to me. Never." He leaned even forwards in his chair, basically only propping on it now. The desperation was now clear in his voice. He reached out to you to try and take hold of your hands but you were too distant.

"I love you more than anything in this world and if you think that I'm going to let you go without a fight, you're sorely mistaken." The steel determination of his words caught you off guard. Nikolai was strong-headed, you knew that better than anyone else, but it had been a long while since that determination had been directed to you.

"You already did." It was barely a whisper. The sad truth about your reality, the downfall of your relationship. The wavering of your voice, the pain in your eyes were enough to tip Nikolai off the edge.

"Milaya, please."He fell onto his knees in front of you. Leaning forward he reached for your hands that he could now hold. "I'm sorry. I put you in a difficult position when I married you and I tried my best to protect you."

"I don't need protecting, Nikolai, especially if it's by pushing me away."

"I was keeping you away from danger and I know that you're strong and capable but I hate to think of you as the object of public slander." His eyes darted between yours, frantic, desperate to make you understand.

"I'm Grisha, Nikolai. It's nothing new to me," you pointed out but then it hit you.

"By difficult position, you meant a Grisha Queen, didn't you?" Your eyes hardened at the implications, your hands going slack in his hold. You would have pulled them away if Nikolai didn't tighten his hold.

"Please, do not think I'm regretting my choice or I think you're not worthy of the title because that's not true." Pulling your hands, he tried to get you closer to him. "I fear that there will be repercussions among the people." And there it was, at last, the truth.

"And among your ministers," you added remembering Emil's lessons on the people at court and their role.

You scoffed when he stayed silent. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I thought I was doing the right thing, my love."

"So Zoya can handle it and I can't?"

"For the millionth time," he groaned, "I don't care about Zoya."

"I only care about you and I know you can handle it. I just didn't want you to. You deserve happiness and peaceful life and I know it's impossible to have in this saints' forsaken country but I can at least try." His eyes lowered in shame and his confession sent a pang through your heart. You took a moment to take in what he said.

Never had you thought about the possibility of Nikolai's distance was a form of protection. You were a soldier of the Second Army, after all. But being a queen, especially a Grisha one, was a delicate thing.

It was the first time in history that something like this happened. Nikolai's worries were not unfounded since even after the destruction of the Fold, anti-Grisha movements were spreading fast.

It was sad to see the General's attempt of assuring safety for Grisha, provoking exactly the opposite thing.

"Oh, Kolya," returning his grip, you leaned towards him, "I just want a life with you by my side."

"As do I. I want you always and forever but above all, I want you safe. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you, you know it right?"

"I just ask that you tell me the truth and let me play the role I've been given."

"It's not going to be easy. People at court-"

"I know. That's why I'm here. Emil's been teaching."

"Well, no more. I'm going to take care of it from now on."

"Is this a promise or a threat?"

"Rest assured my love, the difference between the two is almost nonexistent." He flashed you a smirk and you couldn't help but smile at him. Here it was, your beloved Nikolai.

"Things are going to change, aren't they?" you murmured softly as he gently rested his forehead against yours.

"We're going to show everyone what a "power couple" is." Here was his promise. Sealed with the gentlest nudging of his nose to yours. The action made you smile and your heart soar. You missed these little moments of intimacy with him.

One of his hands came to cradle your face as the other kept hold of your left hand. Your rings softly clicked as they touched. A form of reassurance.

"I love you, y/n."

"And I you, Kolya."

You were completely lost in your little bubble, even more so when Nikolai's lips finally met yours, that you had forgotten where you were. And that there was an embarrassed Kirigin outside the door waiting for the right moment to come in with tea.

[ineffably-human]

the person who made that amazing Laszlo edit said 'why don't we do Laszlo meta' and other people have been doing some excellent work so now I'm inspired, here goes: you could tell me tomorrow that Laszlo was written to have canon ADHD and I would believe you, like I know my tag vomit always says this about him but I truly feel SEEN.

- zero patience before having the good sense to say 'yeah fuck this I'm out' if he's not feeling it

- the finger-wiggle stimming to the point that Kayvan freaking imitated it in Cloak of Duplication

- he committed the horrific crime of turning a baby because he was bored

- without his wife there he was so hyperfocused on writing poetry and jacking off that he forgot to eat

- he either has no interest in someone, or they're his new best friend so he has encyclopedic knowledge of them and would do absolutely anything for them

- I have never seen someone so hyperfixated, he has approximate knowledge of many things and obsessive knowledge of like five. dude knows gardening, music (but specifically making music not learning what any humans are doing with it), books/literature, sex, and his wife. seafaring maybe makes #6. combine any two or more of these things and he'll have some insane-ass story to tell you about it.

- anything else and he either won't touch it or you can tell the exact point he wandered off. he went to go sell his soul so he'd be good at guitar but failed to get the address right. he bothered to buy a hotel room to hide his human disguise in but the entire disguise is jeans and a toothpick. his vampire power is controlling animals but he's never taken the time to do it well. he fucks up hypnosis because he never bothers to think about how he's phrasing stuff. he's like 2/5 of a lawyer and 2/5 of a scientist and keeps buying expensive cars but not learning to drive them.

(this is my life story and I'm not even immortal, every few years I'm like 'I really want to do [nerdy thing], I'll commit to it I SWEAR' and then after a week of obsessive research I get five minutes into it and then go do something else.)

- his Jack the Ripper thing was probably like 'well I am already fucking the prostitute, I may as well eat the prostitute. well I have eaten the prostitute, I may as well do some amateur anatomical study, I'm sure as hell not gonna go to school for that.'

anyway I love him and if I were a vampire I feel like he's exactly what I'd turn into. except hopefully minus the brief stint serial killing/committing horrible taboos, I hope that's like an 'every new vampire has a Phase' thing.

[mrskurono]

Not sure if ur requests are open, but I thought I'd send something anyways. I was wondering if u could do something with Hyoga or Senku from Dr. Stone (doesn't have to be either, of course). Classic enemies to lovers. Absolutely hate eachother. They start bonding (idk how u decide my friend) and realize that they are two idiots in love and don't have a clue what to do LOL (〃▽〃)

a/n: I can't help but see Senku as like....hella demisexual...So I hope you don't mind me doing Hyoga! (plus he's such a bastard I love writing for him)

type: headcanons (’m sorry my brain isn’t working for fic lengths)

tags: angst themes, enemies to lovers, nasty Hyoga, mentions of injuries during combat, blood mentions, as fluffy as Hyoga allows

character(s): Hyoga (dcst)

You are about as important to Hyoga as a spark plug is to a car

Something you don’t think about until it’s broken or gone, in which case, nothing works and everything falls apart without it

To Hyoga that is a weakness in the stone world that pisses him off to no end and in turn that subtly can boil over at times

It’s fine because hating Hyoga is as easy as breathing to you

Making your mutual disdain for one another very obvious to the rest of the revived

Leaving you to both wonder why Tsukasa revived the other

But due to Tsukasa’s plan to restore only the strong and capable, that leaves the two of you making an excellent team in the stone world

Even if the idea of ripping the other’s throat seems more appealing than making it through a winter

You both hold your tongues and simply exist around one another

Survival is key and you both make a formidable pairing whether it be in battle or fighting the elements

And Hyoga hates it

Such strength leads Tsukasa to ask the two of you to preform most of your tasks together, it makes the most sense to have your most capable and strongest doing the hardest work to keep the empire together

There’s a banter that sticks to the both of you

Together this much, and sometimes with others around, has taught you both to be spiteful in your tonality but vague in your words

Lets be honest probably half the empire thinks the two of you are fucking and the other half thinks you’re friends

Not the case

Hyoga knows you’re strong and would do wonders to work under him, so when you say no it only pisses him off more

How can you just not see he’s in the right and obeying him would make things go smoothly?

Tsukasa trusts him, you should do the same even though he’s never given you reason to trust him

Like two lions at ends with each other, it isn’t until the strongest aren’t on top anymore does Hyoga realize what might happen

He might loose

And loosing an asset like you is as big a blow to the Tsukasa empire as it is his ideas

A non fatal but grueling wound makes him reserved around you

To the point your banter becomes one sided and even between coughs and bandage changes, you scoff in his face like he’s wasting time caring about you

The two of you wanted each other dead right?

Hyoga won’t retaliate with any of his own digs at you or even snap at you when you’re bleeding in front of him

Perhaps faced with the fact you’re both held on a similar pedestal and he’s seen you suffer at the hands of the stone world

Or because the very real idea that death happens and it’s this close to him, Hyoga has some reservations about you

And his change in demeanor is quite obvious

“If I guessed, you act like you have a crush on me.”

“Shut up.”

“You’re the one who won’t open your mouth, Hyoga.”

You’re right, he’s much quieter now and much more controlling

No one is aloud to change your bandages but him, no help is taken, Tsukasa’s orders to tend to your well being is taken very seriously and Hyoga won’t leave your side with a cold expression constantly on his face

Even as your wound knits itself closed and you return to full health, Hyoga doesn’t return entirely

Something about him stuck on the fact you could have died

That he could have been rid of you but when faced with it, he wasn’t entirely sure he wanted you gone

What he wanted isn’t exactly how he felt when it was almost gifted to him in the seamless attempt on your life during a fight

His plans for the strongest to be on the top were flawed if you weren’t among the them

For you were as strong as he was and watching your bloodied bandages get changed day in and day out left Hyoga realizing his plan was doomed to fail if he didn’t have your strength combining with his own

Hyoga couldn’t get what he wanted in this stone world if he didn’t have you

[tearsofgrace]

endings are hard... but they aren’t impossible

tldr; the good place fucking nailed the finale, supernatural completely and utterly bombed it.

tags: wc--4.5k, gif heavy, spn meta, the good place, supernatural finale, spn wank, all gifs are mine, if you read til the end there’s a pretty gif

so i recently finished the good place (i was watching w my family and we finally had time to sit down and watch the last season) and god fucking dammit that ending is FLAWLESS. literally flawless. 

and because i’m, well, me… i spent most of the time during that hour long finale thinking about how supernatural could have had even a fraction of that and avoided so much heartbreak. 

anyways. i decided to compare them. to REALLY compare them. to get into the nitty gritty of why the fuck the good place ending left me feeling, as the finale is all about, sated and complete. and why the spn ending left me confused, lost, broken, betrayed, unable to even enjoy my comfort show at all until a dear friend finally just watched an episode (8.08) start to finish with me. 

so without further ado (always wanted to say that) here’s the good place/supernatural finale meta that no one asked for

comedy

we’ll start small. both these shows have excellent comedy. in extremely different ways… but still

in the good place finale, the comedy was perfect. whether it was jason reappearing in the forest, michael trying to get through The Door, tahani reversing the “hot bod” bit on eleanor, every comedic moment was actually pretty emotional and added something to the show. they deepened characters’ meanings, added to their relationships, and made the audience think as much as they made the audience laugh.

in the spn finale… the comedy was the pie gag. the whole sam shoving pie into dean’s face. beyond this being… like meta as hell (the whole prank thing) it doesn’t have any depth to it.

and to add salt to the wound, this “hilarious” thing happens RIGHT AFTER salmondean have a conversation about missing jack and cas that is equal parts flat and infuriating. the brothers, in particular sam about jack and dean about cas, should care more. this is their family. and family is everything to them. but, no, by all means pie dean in the face.

last lines

this one IRKS me. okay. 

the last line of the good place  "I'll say this to you, my friend, with all the love in my heart and all the wisdom of the universe: Take it sleazy.” “All right.”  is ICONIC. okay?

it’s a reference to season 1 that doesn’t feel fan-servicey. it’s kinda honestly emotional cuz it’s like a message to us, the audience. it perfectly completes michael’s arc. it captures the light-hearted vibe of the show while also somehow managing to be poignant. you can see it coming like the second before it happens but it’s also not the obvious choice. it’s just. goddamn it’s good.

the last line of supernatural…. is… “and cut.” not even said by one of j2. i mean i know it’s a meta show but COME ON ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??????????

now i hear you shouting wait but that’s just the end of the thank you message. okay fine whatever. in that case the last lines are “Hey, Sammy.” “Dean.” (i couldn’t bring myself to gif that moment)

i’m sorry but. that’s predictable. that’s obvious. that’s boring. that’s flat. sure, it celebrates the bond between the brothers. but like… that’s not what this show is about anymore. it’s not just about sam and dean winchester it’s about what they’ve created. it’s about the world they’ve saved, the family they’ve made, about how they always keep fighting but nope we get bland, boring, coulda seen ‘em coming from miles away lines for the very end. that’s fine.

montages

the spn finale is like 50% montages that don’t make sense and are poorly done and not emotional

the good place has a montage of michael being human that brought me to tears

timing

here’s another short section. the good place finale was 53 minutes long as opposed to the usual 20 minute long runtime of every episode. granted, the fandom of the good place is very different, but STILL there was no documentary telling the fans things they ALREADY knew (there was a short special after the ep, but the episode itself was still far longer than normal). it was 53 minutes of plot. of really fucking good not rushed plot. 

the supernatural finale was… what 36 minutes long?? as opposed to the normal 40 minute runtime?? granted, we did get an hour long documentary of things we’ve all heard in cons and interviews a billion times so hey. take what you can get i guess.

character arcs

this is most of the meat of this meta. one thing we’ve all been harping on a TON is how they RUINED character arcs. soooo let’s go through and juxtapose some character arcs shall we

eleanor

eleanor shellstrop starts the show completely self-obsessed. she died getting hit by shopping carts while picking up margarita mix and let’s be real she’s a total icon. love her to death. she grows a ton, becomes one of the most selfless characters on the show, and starts to actually (jack forbid) CARE about things. it’s one of the most satisfying and relatable character arcs i’ve ever seen. 

it’s not just her selfishness either, her character is super multi-faceted and complex, and i feel like even in the end we’re getting to know her better. she’s afraid of commitment, always worried about what others’ actions will do to her, loves the trivial side of life, is queer as fuck (as acknowledged by the show in a way that’s not harmful at all but also isn’t explicitly bi/pan/unlabeled/omni etc, allowing queer fans to see their own identity in her), and is all around a HUMAN BEING. her ending at the beginning of the show was her death. her stupid, trivial, meaningless death where she was, as she puts it, all alone. and her final ending ISNT that. yes, everyone goes before her. and i think that’s purposeful. to show that she’s grown enough that being alone in some sense is okay.

but she’s never TRULY alone. and in the end. the REAL end. janet is there. the whole time. because eleanor asked her to be!! she got over her crazy need for independence and simply asked for help. and eleanor dies an amazing person that has become selfless, has found joy in philosophy while still enjoying trashy content, has fixed her relationship with her mother, and has found a sense of completion. eleanor’s life ends on her terms, and it’s beautiful.

dean

alright. now just as you’re feeling all warm and fuzzy let’s look at dean winchester’s ending. you’ve heard it a million times, so i’ll be brief. dean was raised to be a hunter, a soldier, a killing machine with no feelings and no purpose. he was raised to die scared on a hunt, his life over because of some mistake he made because he will NEVER measure up. at least that’s what john and everyone else told him with the exceptions of some of his family (and family don’t end in blood). he started to accept that he didn’t have to have this. he started to realize that he could CHOOSE what his ending was. 

the beautiful thing is, we never truly got to see what that was. i personally like to think it’s similar to the roadhouse michael locked him in while he was trapped in his own mind. a safe place for hunters, somewhere he (and cas in my opinion, but that’s not important) could settle down and still be in the life. it would be an amazing tribute to jo and ellen, and just all around a great ending. he wouldn’t have to be scared, but he wouldn’t have to conform to some apple pie facade of normalcy. and ya know what?? say that he died so he could have peace i dare you. because dean doesn’t find peace until sam is there anyway so i beg of you WHAT WAS THE FUCKING POINT. 

dean winchester died scared. dean winchester died on a hunt. dean winchester died on one of john’s old hunts. dean winchester died not directly at the hands of a monster, but at the hands of a mistake. his mistake. dean winchester died without ever working through the trauma of his best friend in the entire world confessing his love in a final act of self-sacrifice. dean winchester died in a way that leaves a sour taste in my mouth and does not at all show the audience what he’s been through and how much he’s grown. dean winchester did not die on his terms, and he deserved better.

chidi

okay back to happy. chidi anagonye. by far my personal favorite good place character (don’t tell anyone i always say jason cuz he and i are very similar). chidi in the last few episodes is SO DRASTICALLY different than the chidi we meet at the beginning. he’s decisive, confident, self-assured, and it’s amazing to see. he’s not afraid of life anymore. he’s not afraid to make the wrong decision and forever alter his reality, because he’s okay with failure. 

at the beginning, chidi was so petrified of life that… it killed him. and in the end, he’s completely at peace with every decision he makes, even the final one. yes, he considered staying for eleanor, but that just shows how his moral code and his compassion for others is still very much still intact. it shows the audience that you can be confident and decisive without being a selfish asshole. 

chidi leaves the good place knowing that it’s the right thing to do. knowing without a doubt that his time has come. the old chidi never would have been able to fathom being that sure about something. it’s beautiful. it’s a development that can give the audience peace, can show them that this drastic of change is possible, and that chidi became a better person for all of it. chidi went on his own terms, and it was beautiful.

sam

… this one might be controversial… but sam winchester. god i hated sam’s ending. at first i was kinda okay with it. like, okay fine he got his normal life. but, really, in the end that’s not what sam wanted. he started to realize that he didn’t need that apple pie, white picket fence life. he didn’t need the wife and the kids and the backyard and the barbecues because that is NOT sam’s personality and i will throw hands on that. 

that’s not to say he doesn’t want some sort of romance, maybe even kids, but not in that way. he lets himself see that he doesn’t need to be defined by his rebellion to john. doesn’t need to be defined by going to college or any of those “normal” smart kid things because it doesn’t fit him. and that’s okay! but how does sam’s story end? it ends with a wife (that isn’t even important enough to show her face). with kids. with a goddamn white picket fence. we think he’s still hunting to some extent… but it’s not the arc we were led to believe would happen. it’s not this amazing leader sam that we see in season 12-14, uniting hunters and organizing them. 

he had SO MUCH potential and they throw it away on a vanilla ending that shows only surface level pain at losing his brother. he doesn’t even invite the rest of their family to the wake for fuck’s sake. jared did an incredible job. pls don’t think i’m saying he didn’t. but that script…. sam winchester’s arc was cut short. he didn’t go on his terms, and he deserved better.

jason

jason mandoza. the only character that has ever embodied my complete dumbass energy to the insane extent that it exists. he went to hell for his impulsivity. he never thought before a decision. i aspire to be as reckless as jason while on earth. but he LEARNED. he got better, just like they all did. and by the end of the show, jason doesn’t need to be impulsive anymore. much like eleanor being left “alone,” the show does a masterful job with making him be the first one to go, capturing his old impulsiveness. but he chooses to leave. he takes his time in deliberation, waiting until a feeling of peace, of completion, of well, ‘true happiness’ (sorry cas stans, i’m right there with you) has settled over him. 

the ending of his story is one of growth, just like all these characters have been. and the best part? the show makes it comedic in the most poignant and beautiful way, because it’s jason, it had to be funny. we learn that jason has been in the woods for like, eons, just waiting to go through the door because he wants to give janet a necklace. he’s learned to simply wait. to be at peace with… nothing. his torture was being a monk, but in the end, jason embodies those ideals. his arc comes to fruition in an extremely satisfying way. jason goes on his own terms, and it’s beautiful.

castiel

this one is gonna hurt like a bitch. castiel is my comfort character. he’s my role model. he’s me in a lot of ways. i love him. so fucking much. so excuse me if this is slightly incoherent. i’m actually okay with cas’ ending… in a way. because his actual ending as an on-screen character? perfect. self-sacrifice while coming out and professing his love to dean winchester. a little bit bury the gays, but let’s be real, it’s supernatural. and “happiness is in just saying it” has to be the most powerful way to think of coming out. it takes away the fear, it takes away so much of the pain that can follow. because the joy is in just saying the words.

it’s how this was treated on the show that makes cas’ character arc terrible (and we haven’t even gotten to 15.20). YOU CANNOT JUST IGNORE A LOVE CONFESSION. that is god awful writing and i will never change my mind on that. cas deserved his family to care about him. to at least address and be sad about the fact he was gone. jesus fucking christ after everything castiel deserved at least that. and then we go to 15.20. cas is in heaven. cas is serving god. cas is right back where he started. now, i’m coming off a little strong. 

if the show had decided to show us cas and jack in heaven makin’ the world a better place… i woulda come around to it. i woulda realized that that’s not REALLY erasing 12 years of character development and cas realizing that his whole identity isn’t just him serving heaven and isn’t just him being an angel and that he’s so much more than all of that and he could still be happy as a human… because really he’s with his son. but they didn’t show us that. they barely even mentioned him. and to me. that counts as a bad character arc. and i’m sorry if you disagree. castiel may have gone on his own terms, but they treated that beautiful sacrifice with disrespect and disdain, plus resolved his arc by putting him back where he started. he deserved better.

tahani

*deep breaths guys this is a long post i’m sorry* anywayyyy tahani!!! we love tahani obviously. let’s talk about her arc, because it always kinda bothered me. throughout the show, we see all the other character’s growing and expanding their knowledge of right and wrong. and, don’t get me wrong. we see tahani grow a lot. but she makes a lot of the same types of comments and shit like that. but it’s how she treats the reactions to those comments. by the end of the show, she laughs at the caricature of herself that the others see. she isn’t looking for vindication in name-dropping, she just does it. she is far less self-absorbed, and is genuinely interested in those around her. she fixes her relationships with her sister and her parents in a way that doesn’t feel forced and actually feels like a beautiful, healthy family reunion. 

she has a list and she does everything on it. it’s worth noting, that the things on her list are not at all what they would have been at the beginning of the show. most of them are humble “labor” type tasks, and all of them are in self improvement. tahani’s end on the show is not the same as everyone else’s. she realizes that she doesn’t need to be done. that there doesn’t have to be an end to self-improvement. and she becomes an architect. the writers perfectly embody her transformation from a self-obsessed rich girl who has never done a thing for herself and laughs at the lower-class to a down-to-earth worker that simply doesn’t want the journey to end. 

it’s incredible how perfectly the writers were able to close off these character arc’s without it feeling forced, and without ignoring their character development. imagine that. tahani chooses her own way, and it’s beautiful.

jack

jack’s ending may be the only one that i’ve actually somewhat come to terms with. it’s not terrible. it’s not great. but it’s not nearly as bad. because ignoring that awful monologue about every drop of rain and shit, jack really does end up helping people. he ends up doing something that he loves and that makes the world a better place. and he doesn’t lose his personality in it. but. i dunno, that’s still his destiny, right? to create paradise. and this is a show about ripping up the rule book, about choosing free will above all else… so to have every single character just fulfill their destiny is cheap. 

still… i’ll try to be unbiased. because really at the beginning of jack’s time on the show, he’s unsure what he wants. and at least, in the end, he’s sure. he has a wisdom that he’s always had but he’s now using. and i’m good with that. but what’s NOT okay about jack’s ending is the lack of on-screen family. jack learns that family is important. sam, cas, dean those are the people he cares about. and you’re telling me he would just NEVER see them again? and be okay with that? i know he rebuilds heaven with cas, but we don’t even get a story about him rescuing cas from the empty. and he seems in 15.19 to not be that concerned about it (after the amazing emotional scene at the beginning). jack should have cared about his family. he did. but they ruined that for him. so jack kline deserved better.

michael

oh man where do i start. michael’s growth is the biggest on the show. i mean. he starts as a literal demon and ends a human. he gets better, he falls in love with humanity (*castiel fan in me sobbing again*) and he chooses over and over to be good instead of bad. his whole arc is a classic redemption arc, and every single beat just gets better. he chooses selfishly to side with humans but in the end it turns out to be the best decision he could have made. because he develops emotions, he develops compassion, he develops a moral compass. 

and his end reflects that. because to complete this arc of a demon becoming more human… he literally becomes human!!!! it fits so well. and he’s allowed to make mistakes and be happy and gain all that humanity has to offer. this just shows that human!endgame for cosmic beings that become more human WORKS SO WELL (and it shoulda happened for cas and jack that’s all i’m saying). michael went on his own terms, and it was beautiful.

eileen

oh boy… this one stings. because they brought her back, used her up, and we never saw her again. eileen was one of the best side characters on the show, and they rarely addressed her arc. she comes onto the show as a hunter seeking revenge, and gets that revenge in the same episode. her s15 arc is focused on what’s real and what’s not, with her relationship to sam admittedly being a central part of her character because… it’s supernatural and women can’t exist without that. but still! eileen grows throughout the show and in the end… we don’t even know what happens to her. it’s as if her arc wasn’t important enough to even glance at. 

it’s as if the connections the boys make outside of each other mean nothing when in reality they mean everything. they prove that the co-dependency is behind them and that family doesn’t end with blood and that real connections can be formed between people that last a lifetime. eileen was a disabled hunter that was shown to still be one of the best in the business, and they didn’t even give her the courtesy of a goodbye. eileen didn’t go on her own terms, and she deserved better.

janet

this is gonna unbalance my list but goddammit janet’s ending was perfect. she was a not-robot, not-girl that should have been incapable of feelings. but throughout the series we get to watch as she learns first-hand about human emotions and processes them. she cares about the humans in her charge and fights for them on multiple counts. 

in the end, we see janet come to terms with both her cosmic being side, and her human side. she never stops being with the “cockroaches.” she sees them all leave, she’s there for them while they’re there, and she also continues to speak her mind and live autonomously. janet was a non-human character done right. she lived on her own terms, and it was beautiful.

some honorable mentions

spn ignored (in the finale) chuck, amara, stevie, charlie, jody, donna, garth, bess, the other angels, claire, kaia, patience, alex, and the list goes ON in favor of focusing on JUST sam and dean. did none of those characters at least deserve a quick goodbye??????

the good place wrapped up multiple arcs i had completely forgotten about in a totally natural and not forced way. mindy, doug forester, (the mushroom guy, i know, it took me a second), pillboy, donkey doug, kamilah, tahani’s parents, eleanor’s mother, eleanor’s friends, chidi’s best friend, vicki, shawn, glenn, simone and so many that i’m forgetting all got satisfying ends that they totally deserved. 

they even fucking resolved FROG GUY’S arc and gave him a real frog. that’s right. frog guy (jeff) had a better character arc resolution than dean motherfucking winchester. 

heaven and hell

obviously in very different vehicles, both shows explore in depth the realities of the afterlife. and lemme tell ya, at the end of the day, one sits a whole lot better than the other. 

the good place finale ends this quest for the perfect afterlife by saying that everyone can improve and that an eternal paradise shouldn’t keep you from eternal rest. they pretty much make me wish that this is what our afterlife looked like. they handle everything with care so it’s balanced precariously in a way that doesn’t give you anxiety looking at it but instead fills you with peace and faith in humanity. 

supernatural addresses this series long battle between heaven and hell by creating a heaven where you drive for forty years without seeing the people (cough cough cas and jack not his parents) that matter to you and drink beer that tastes like shit. a place you can’t be happy or find any sense of peace until your brother has died and he’s there too.

and hell… well they barely even address it. there’s a new queen of hell i guess? but so what. it’s still very much heaven and hell in a way that’s the worst and hey plus to them… makes me wanna stay alive thank you very much. oh and purgatory is in shambles and not functioning properly cuz all that eve bullshit.

loose ends

whenever something is ending, you gotta tie up the loose ends. not in a “oh, we must wrap everything up and leave no stone unturned” kinda way but in a “wow, we should probably try to make this unambiguous because this is the last time we will ever see these characters” kinda way. 

the good place does that. so fucking masterfully. all these side plots with all these different characters were taken care of all while focusing on the main six characters. we get to see how their intervention has changed everyone else. for example, mindy’s arc is wrapped up perfectly, with eleanor going to save her.

plus different running jokes like “take it sleazy” are wrapped up, we revisit really old callbacks like the original neighborhood, and all of it feels natural and in the moment. it feels like full circle in a way that doesn’t erase growth. 

supernatural, on the other hand, left a million loose ends open. what happened to the boys they saved? where the fuck are jody, donna, etc.? did eileen make it back? cuz sam was pretty upset about that. what happened to it “being loud” in the empty? hell, what happened to the empty? what happened to hell? what about chuck? it woulda been nice to see just for a second what became of him. did charlie and stevie make it (i’m very invested in that relationship)? if we’re taking the original ending… why the fuck is jimmy there? did kansas just all,,, die? 

i’m not saying they needed to address everything… but god a few wrapped up storylines besides the brothers wouldn’t have hurt

coloring

can i just… real quick… as a giffer lodge a complaint

the good place has beautiful vibrant coloring in the finale

spn has like bland washed out whatever the fuck that is coloring. it’s not even the dark early aesthetic cuz they dropped that it’s just… ew. so. do with that what you will. 

conclusion

first… while writing this i realized just HOW MUCH it’s not about destiel… like believe me. i knew i wasn’t just pissed about destiel. but holy shit it’s not destiel at all like did i even mention destiel that much???? this was never about a ship. this was just a trash finale. 

in the end. the good place writers knew what they were doing. they knew their fans, they knew their characters, they knew their world, and they knew how to wrap it up in a way that was satisfying and sad and perfectly fit the tone of the whole show. it wasn’t out of character or rushed, basically every loose end was tied up without the audience even realizing that’s what they were doing, and i feel happy and complete having watched it. 

the supernatural ending was a betrayal. flat out. to the audience that has stuck by it in a way bigger way than the good place fandom. to the characters that have helped so many people. to the actors that have given so much of their lives. to the other members of the crew, to certain writers… all of it was just a slap in the face.

we deserved better guys. there are better endings possible. so i’m sorry. i really am. but i guess… that’s what fanfic is for, right?

[mermaidxatxheart]

Better Together Chapter Seven

Chapter 7 already? I must really love you guys. I hope you enjoy. If you'd like to be added to my tag list, send me an ask. My work is not to be reposted under any name or anywhere else. Reblogs and comments, however, are always welcome.

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Reader

Warnings: trauma, probably language, descriptions of violence, torture, blood.

Word Count: 2k

Series Master List

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

The sunlight is bright and you twist your face into Poe’s chest, trying to hide from it. You feel him chuckle under you and it’s only then that you realize he’s awake already.

“Morning.” He says softly.

“What time is it?” You mumble.

“Early, about six.”

“How can you sleep with the sun shining in your eyes like that?”

“I like getting up early.” His fingers trail lightly over your arm and he pulls you tight against his side.

You’re quiet for a long time, but it’s not because he’s lulled you back to sleep. You feel bad for waking him up so late last night. “I’m sorry I woke you up.” You say finally.

“It’s okay. I’d rather you wake me up if you need me than suffer by yourself.” He brushes your hair back behind your ear. “I don’t sleep much anyway.” He admits.

“Because of dreams?” You ask, twisting your head back to look up at him.

“Among other things, yeah.”

You squint and he smiles softly. If you had to pick which is brighter, the sun or Poe’s smile? Poe’s smile wins by a landslide.

“Here, roll over.” He urges, guiding you onto your other side. He turns behind you, wrapping his arm around your waist.

“This isn’t any better.” You huff. His chest shakes behind you as he laughs. You lift his arm and roll back over so you’re facing him. His soft brown eyes are watching you, amusement sparkling in them as you shift.

“Now you’re facing the window again.” He points out. So, you tuck your face into the crook of his neck and take a big, satisfying breath. “G-good now?” He asks quietly.

“Yeah.” You whisper, eyes already drooping shut again.

***

“I can talk to Leia, you don’t have to do the report.” Poe says.

“I told her I would. She said I could take time but I was petty and angry at the time and said I would have it for her by today.” You tell him, pushing yourself up from the bed.

“So that means you can still take your time.” He says, catching your wrist gently. “Stay.” He whispers and you turn back to him. “Please?”

“Come with me. You can get some food. I know you need caf. I kept you from doing your usual stuff all morning.” You say, kneeling on the bed. This feels dangerous. It feels like flirting, like crossing a line. But you meant it when you said that Poe is the easiest person to be around.

“You should get food, too.” He says, pushing himself up closer to you. One little inch and you’d be almost touching. You could kiss him. You could feel his lips on yours, tell him how much you…

Your eyes close and he pulls back. You should have expected it. But that doesn’t stop you from feeling like the floor is falling out from under you. Suddenly, you don’t want him to go with you. You straighten up, feeling dizzy and unbalanced. You feel numb, you can’t feel your pulse, can’t hear the way you’re breathing too quickly.

“I just remembered. It’s been a while since I’ve showered. I should do that first.” You mutter, already turning for the door.

“Y/N,” he calls, but the door is already shutting behind you and you squeeze your eyes shut. You deserved that. Why would you think he would want to kiss you again?

Poe can only be your friend. Nothing more. He doesn’t want anything more from you. And honestly, count yourself lucky that he even wants that much.

You hurry off to your room, locking the door behind you. You just want to be alone. That’s what’s best for everyone. Painfully, you peel off your clothes, wincing as every move causes you pain.

You shower quickly, blindly, taking no more time than is absolutely necessary. It would be so easy to just let yourself cry, pretend it’s the water dripping down your face instead of salty tears, but you can’t go there. You can’t let yourself feel sorry anymore. You made this mess, ruined a perfectly good friendship, cheated on your boyfriend and now you have to deal with the consequences of that. You’re in your comfiest clothes, settled at your desk to start your report. You wish you had thought to ask how much detail Poe had put in his. He clearly exaggerated about your part in what happened.

Your hands hover over the keyboard, waiting for your brain to tell them what to type. The longer you wait, the more they start to shake. You yank them back against your chest, squeezing them painfully to get them to stop. You welcome the pain, it somehow serves as your penance for what you’ve done.

Your door tries to open and there’s a muffled curse outside, startling you. You quickly unlock it and outside is Bryce. He holds out a caf silently and your eyes widen and you realize you promised him you’d be in the med bay after his shift.

“How was it?” You ask, taking the cup and backing up to let him in.

“Boring as always. I hate post work. Nothing ever happens.” He grumbles, following you and flopping on your bed. “What happened?” He asks, balling up your pillow and stuffing it under his chest to rest on.

“Um,” you clear your throat, scrambling for an answer that wouldn’t start a fight. I went to sleep with the guy you hate would definitely start a fight. “I couldn’t sleep. Kept waking up. Then I just said screw it. Been trying to work on this stupid report of what happened.” You gesture and he nods, understanding. At least, understanding your words. You know he doesn’t understand what you’re feeling. Nothing bad has ever happened to Bryce.

“What did happen?” He asks, tilting his head to look at you.

The blood drains out of your face and your hands start to shake. Your stomach falls to your feet and your knees get weak. “I-I don’t… I don’t really wanna talk about it.” You mutter, sitting back down before you fall down. You take a sip of the caf and try not to blanch. He never makes it how you like it and every time you forget.

“Well, you’re gonna have to talk about it. People are gonna wanna know.” He says, his voice gentle like he’s trying to be kind. But it feels like a punch to the gut. Why would people need to know what happened to you? Before you can protest, there’s a knock on your door. Bryce glares at it before looking at you. “Expecting someone?” He asks pointedly.

“No. I wasn’t even expecting you.” You stand up and press the release, even more surprised to see Snap on the other side.

He looks nervous as shit, holding out a bag of food from the commissary, and a caf. He has never ever brought you food before. “P…” he cuts off and glances down the hall. “Pando in the lab wanted me to remind you that he needs your help analyzing those plants you brought back.” He says, rolling his eyes at the name.

You frown in confusion, taking the bag. “Pando?” You repeat.

He narrows his eyes and slides them to the right, back down the hallway where he looked the first time. “Yeah. Pando. That’s what he told me. He needs your help.”

The name is entirely unfamiliar. As far as you know, it’s not even a name at all. “Alright… well, if you see… Pando, then let him know I’ll be there in a while. I have something to finish.” You say and he nods. Abruptly he turns and walks down the hall to your right and you blink. Maybe Snap is losing it? Too many missions? Flying too close to the sun? Maybe his ox-mask isn’t operating at full capacity. You poke your head out to watch him, wondering if he’s okay, and a figure darts from view before you can catch a good glimpse.

“That guy.” Bryce shakes his head.

“He’s a good dude. Just under a lot of pressure.”

“Who’s Pando?” He asks, taking the bag of food from you and rolling over onto his back.

You have a feeling you know who Snap was talking about, but why would he lie? Do you keep up the lie? Something in your gut tells you that telling the truth would be a bad idea. “Just one of the guys from the science division.” You shrug.

Bryce digs into your food and you frown. “I thought I knew all the freaks you work with.” He tilts his head, biting into a yacba fruit.

“They’re not freaks.” You snatch your food back. “And you don’t know everything about me. I have work to do.” You say and he rolls his eyes.

“So? Do it. I’m not stopping you.” He sighs, stretching out and laying back.

You want to hit him with something, that rage burning through your veins again. To save your holopad, you grab it, the bag of food, and the caf from Snap and march out of your room. You’ll find somewhere to eat in peace and then go to the lab and find this Pando.

There’s an observation tower on the outskirts of the compound that isn’t used anymore. You climb to the top, leaning against the stone post overlooking the woods. Finally, peace and quiet.

While you eat, you try to get as much of the report done as you can. You decide to be vague on the method of interrogation, instead focusing on what they wanted to know.

The lack of horrific details in your report doesn’t stop you from remembering them.

Hours. He has been asking you questions for hours. For every one unanswered, he slices at your best friend, nicking his skin all over. His face, his hands, his arms, his chest, his legs. There isn’t a body part left unscathed.

For his credit, he never wavers, never gives any sign of weakness, never cries out. He just clenches his jaw, and squeezes his eyes shut.

You, on the other hand, can’t stop crying. You’ll keep your promise, but seeing your best friend in so much pain hurts more than anything you’ve ever experienced.

In the back of your mind, you wonder how he knows about being tortured. As far as you know, he’s never been captured. He’s an excellent soldier, always on guard, always alert. He knows his shit, he’s good at this.

Until he goes on a solo mission with you.

And then you kiss him. And he drops his guard. Now he’s being hurt.

The trooper grunts in dissatisfaction and sets his blade down. “Seems like you rebel scum like pain.” He says, starting to take off his gauntlets and gloves.

Your stomach tightens, nerves spiking as you watch his movements warily. Is he going to give Poe a break, and turn on you?

“Nothing’s as painful as living in the world of the First Order.” Poe replies calmly.

Before you can see it coming, the trooper throws his fist, slamming it into Poe’s solar plexus. Poe doubles over as much as he can, coughing hard and gasping for air. You press your lips together to keep from crying out as your tears spill over. The trooper rains down blow after blow all over his body. His lip splits against his teeth, blood dripping down his chin. Around his eye, his cheekbone, along his jaw; you can hear his ribs shifting, maybe cracking.

Your heart breaks for him. You want to do something to help him, but you’re useless against your restraints.

“Ready to give up your precious General?” The trooper sneers, grabbing Poe’s thick hair and pulling up on it to see his face.

“Who?”

The trooper drops his head unceremoniously and turns to you for the first time. “You can stop his pain.” He taunts. “Just give us the location of your base.”

You straighten yourself as much as you can in defiance. “What base?” You ask coldly.

He grumbles and grabs his gloves, stalking from the room. Poe lets his head sag, breathing hard. You don’t dare speak. Blood drips from his mouth slowly, pooling on the floor.

You twist your face away so you don’t have to see your handiwork, crying silently. You can only hope that for the next session, they turn their attention to you instead of Poe.

He deserves so much better.

Chapter 8

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[n00dl3gal]

Like Old Times (Father-Son Bonding AU)

A direct sequel to the “Expiration Date” fic, which I’ll link in a reblog. I’ve also posted all my fics in this AU to AO3!! Thanks again to @thetriggeredhappy for their help and just generally being a cool dude, and the Scoutsune Discord server for indulging my brainrot

No warnings beyond family schmoop!

Less than an hour after the bread monster incident, the Administrator called for a ceasefire. “Only while your base is repaired,” she said over the TV screen. “BLU is quite disappointed in this negligence- as am I. Regardless, you may use these three days as you see fit. Go home, stay here- whatever you do, no more bread monsters.” The screen turned off with a click. 

Scout exhaled through his nose. He was thankful there was no mention of him or Miss Pauling’s woodchipper. 

Spy decloaked behind him. “Less time than I wanted, but c’est la vie.” Scout looked at him over his shoulder. “I’m meeting with an old contact during our break,” Spy said in Italian. “Would you like to come along? It’ll be like old times.” 

Scout’s brow furrowed, but he nodded. At least this way, he’d get out of helping Engie and Heavy with repairs. And possibly meeting Miss Pauling’s woodchipper. 

“Excellent. Our flight is at 7 AM tomorrow.” 

“We’re flying commercial?” Scout asked, also in (more hesitant) Italian. 

“Our destination is continental. We’ll leave the base by 5:30.” Scout groaned as Spy started to leave. But- wait, he hadn’t- 

“Oi, where are we going, anyway?” he called back in English. 

Spy paused to look at him and smile. “Boston.” 

“Why do we always get the ass-crack-of-dawn flights?” Jeremy asked groggily, reclining his seat.

“They are the ones with first-class seats available,” Raphael replied. He took a sip from his mimosa. 

“Yeah, cuz God forbid you fly coach for once.” Jeremy shifted, trying to get comfortable. “Hey. Have I ever been to Boston before?”

Raphael didn’t answer immediately. His lip sucked in, as if in thought. “Yes. When you were very, very young. You wouldn’t remember.” 

Jeremy nodded. He wanted to ask more, there was something Raphael wasn’t saying but… well, he was never a morning person. He fell asleep before the plane even took off. 

. . .

It was mid-afternoon by the time they landed in Boston. Jeremy was never fond of long flights; having his legs cramped like that for extended periods of time was murder. He was half tempted to take a jog around Logan International. Raphael, on the other hand, was ushering them both to the car rental. “Can’t even get a stretch in, huh?”

“Unfortunately, we are expected by 4, and I would hate to keep my contact waiting,” Raphael explained in French, accepting the keys from the girl at the counter. “She’s not a very patient woman, in some regards.” 

Jeremy huffed but didn’t argue. He just followed his father to the rental, tossing his suitcase in the backseat. “Y’know, the girl at the counter-” 

“We will not have time for you to go out on a date, Jeremy.” 

“No! No, it was- her accent’s kinda like mine, it’s weird,” Jeremy said. Raphael started the car. “Cuz I’ve only been here as a baby, and I got mine from TV and shit. It’s just… really strange, is all.” 

Raphael made a quiet noise of agreement. “Some of the shows you watched as a child were filmed here. It’s not as complex as you think it is.” 

“Yeah, probably not…” 

The pair lapsed into silence as Raphael drove. Storefronts and high rises morphed into houses. It had been a while since they were in a residential area. RED, for understandable reasons, kept away from civilians. 

Raphael took the roads with practiced experience. Sure, it had been implied he knew the area. If he had a contact here- one with a house, presumably- he must’ve spent time here. But this- this was far too familiar. A bit suspicious, actually. 

Eventually, Raphael slowed in front of a more rundown Brownstone. Still quite nice, just needed a little work. It felt… welcoming, in a way Jeremy couldn’t name.

“Lotta cars,” he observed as Raphael parallel parked. “Must be a party going on somewhere.” 

“Hmm, perhaps,” Raphael said, turning the car off. “Would you mind ringing the doorbell for me? I need to grab something from the trunk. Ask for Sara Jane.” 

OK, now Jeremy knew something was up. He was never the one to make the first contact, that was always Dad’s job. Jeremy might be a full-grown adult, but there were some things that didn’t change. This was one of them. 

Still, he nodded. He climbed up the front steps and ringed the doorbell. He heard- multiple voices from inside, predominantly male, but they quickly silenced themselves. A TV, perhaps? They really ought to get that flower box on the second story window fixed- 

The woman who opened the door was a bit shorter than him, though not by much. She was wearing a simple dress, hoop earrings, and flats. Her hair was dark, curved to her chin. But her nose and earlobes felt… achingly familiar. Like Jeremy saw them all the time. 

“Um, hi, I’m looking for Sara Jane? My name’s-” The rest of his speech was knocked out of him as the woman launched herself at him. Jeremy braced for an attack, but quickly realized she was… hugging him. 

She was hugging him, sobbing, and choked out the word “Jeremy.” 

Wait. He knew that voice. He had only heard it a few times in his life, few enough he could count them on one hand, but he knew it. “M-Ma?” he whispered. 

The woman- Sara Jane- Ma looked up at him, still crying. Her hands found his face as she observed him. “Y-yeah, sweetie, it’s me, it’s-it’s your ma,” she said. 

“Ma!” he laughed, tears of his own dancing down his cheeks. He hugged her back, practically lifting her off her feet. “Oh my God, Ma! I-I never thought I’d-” 

“Oh Jeremy, sweetie, look how tall you’ve gotten! Last I saw you, you fit in my arms! My baby, my handsome baby,” she spoke over him. She rubbed circles into his back as they embraced. It felt so, so right. 

Jeremy laughed even harder. “Are you kiddin’? I got it from you, you’re beautiful, Ma!” He stared at her, trying to commit every mole and wrinkle and perfect flaw to memory. “I can’t believe- oh my God, I’m actually meeting you!” 

“It was long overdue,” another voice said, as Raphael joined them on the front stoop. “I had put it off for safety reasons, but considering our current, ah, situation… I felt it was worth the risk.” 

Sara Jane squealed, pulling Raphael into the hug as well. “You’ve been taking good care of my boy, you promise me, Raphael?” 

“Don’t worry Ma, he’s the best dad I could ask for, considering,” Jeremy teased. 

“Oh, don’t I know it. Called me up last night and told me to get the whole motley crew together. Even managed to get Melvin to bring his twin daughters, bless his wife’s heart,” she explained. 

Jeremy blinked. “Uh- Melvin? Daughters?”

Sara Jane laughed. It sounded so much like Jeremy’s it practically hurt. This was his mother. Lord, he’s finally seeing her. “Melvin’s your older brother, sweetie. Eh, sixth oldest. Bobby’s the oldest.” 

“I have a brother?”

“Oh honey, you’re the youngest of eight,” Sara Jane said plainly. 

“...fuck,” Jeremy whispered. 

. . .

He didn’t just have seven brothers. He had seven brothers, four of which brought their wives, one who brought his boyfriend, and three who brought their kids. And the kids totaled to an additional six, counting the babies. 

It was… an admittedly tight squeeze in the living room. 

Sara Jane introduced Jeremy. Jeremy had been expecting to be treated like a stranger. He had vanished when he was a baby, after all, and his younger-older brothers probably wouldn’t remember him at all. 

And yet, it was like he knew them all his life. 

They teased him and punched him playfully and acted so friendly, so familial it nearly made Jeremy break down. He was still crying from meeting Ma, but being dogpiled with so much affection was suffocating. In a good way. He had seen on sitcoms the intrinsic bond between family, and while he felt it with Dad, they also risked their lives nearly daily. But it was real, it was here, and it was wrapping him in a warm blanket. 

Despite the chaos and the sheer number of people, Jeremy didn’t feel overwhelmed. He laughed and played along with their jokes, cracking some back when he could get a word in. Scott ragged on his dog tags, he countered by pointing out the hole in his pants. Michael told him he was still a shortass, he replied with “it takes one to know one.” Elliot and Ricky were the closest to actually getting hurt, and that was only because Jeremy elbowed them both so hard they nearly fell over. 

For the first time in 25 years, Jeremy understood what “home” meant. 

The kids were especially curious, eager to meet their uncle and step-grandfather. Within seconds, young Rebecca- only four years old- was challenging Jeremy to a race around the house. “I’m the fastest kid in the world,” she bragged, puffing out her chest. 

“Oh yeah?” Jeremy asked. “That a fact?”

“You wanna test me? I beat Johnny Three-Legs at running, and he’s got three legs!” Jeremy laughed and stood from the couch, letting her lead him outside. “On the count of three, OK?”

“You’re on, pipsqueak,” Jeremy teased.

“Onetwothree GO!” Rebecca yelled, taking off in a sprint. Jeremy knew that, by all accounts, he should beat her. His legs were longer, she didn’t have the proper running stance, and it was his job to be fast. That’s what he got paid to do. But some small voice was telling him to let her win, so he did. “Ha! I told ya!” 

“Ya sure did,” he replied, mock panting. “Look at you, a freaking blur on the green. You’re goin’ to the Olympics, kid.” 

Rebecca beamed and hugged his leg. “Promise, Uncle Jeremy?” He nodded because, after that display, there was no way he could speak without squeaking like a chew toy. 

Rebecca skipped back inside, past Raphael, who was watching on the stoop. “You’re a natural with children,” he observed. “I used to do the same thing when you were that age.” 

“Wait- wait, really? You sure fooled me,” Jeremy said. 

Raphael rolled his eyes. “What’s my job again, mon lapin?”

“Yeah, yeah…” Jeremy leaned against the railing, watching Raphael’s cigarette smoke in the wind. “Hey. Uh… thanks for arranging all of this. You really didn’t need to.”

“But I did. I meant it when I said this was overdue. I’ve been wanting to introduce you to the rest of the family for a while, but have been unable. Then that whole ordeal with the supposed tumors, and-” Raphael exhaled slowly. “It wouldn’t have been fair to you if you died without knowing them. I would’ve never forgiven myself.” 

Jeremy punched his shoulder lightly. “Don’t be so hard on yourself, pops. It all worked out, we’re still kicking, and that roast chicken Ma’s making smells incredible. Everything’s perfect.” 

Raphael finished his cigarette and smiled. “Oui. It is.” 

. . .

While Sara Jane had been able to get the rest of the family here, it was a school night. Kids needed to be tucked in by 9:30, so most of Jeremy’s brothers were gone by 8. Elliot was staying overnight, as was his boyfriend. Otherwise, the house quickly went from bustling to barren. 

It gave Jeremy a chance to explore his would-be childhood home.

He made his way upstairs, pushing open one of the doors. It led- to little surprise- to a bedroom. It was set up like a nursery, with a crib in one corner and a toddler bed in the other. Toys were scattered about across the floor. 

He heard Sara Jane sigh behind him. “This was your room, you know.” Jeremy turned to look at her as she flipped the light switch. “That crib… I had put you to bed the night your father planned to fake his death. I was in on the whole plan, naturally. He wanted to hold you one last time, so I said OK. When I woke up the next morning… you were both gone.” She exhaled slowly, grabbing onto his shoulder. “I wrote both of you off as dead, but I knew what had happened. Honestly, should’ve figured it out before then. You hadn’t woken me up crying,” she joked. Her eyes were watering. 

Jeremy hugged her, pulling her close. “You never took the crib down?” 

“By the time I was ready, Bobby’s wife was pregnant, so I kept it up for my grandbabies. I knew- I knew you were out there, sweetie. Both of you.” She kissed his cheek, squeezing him.

“I-I never got to be a normal kid, really,” he confessed. “I mean, Dad did his best, gave me comic books and board games and stuff, but-but I never went to school or made friends or anything like that. I-I didn’t even know I had a family. It took me forever to even realize I had a Ma. An-and everything I did-” The tears were flowing again, more freely than earlier. “Ya missed me losing my first tooth, and potty trainin’, and all that stuff parents should know about. I-I’m sorry,” he whispered. 

Sara Jane wiped his cheek dry. “Don’t apologize for what your father did, Jeremy. And definitely don’t apologize for me not potty training another kid. Besides… hold on, I’ll be right back.” She made her way down the hallway. Jeremy didn’t follow, instead deciding to examine the crib. This was where he grew up. It was a simple crib, obviously well-used. Not worn-down, mind, just… used. It had a history. A history that Jeremy wanted to decode, but unlike his dad’s ciphers, he didn’t have the key. 

“Took me a second to find it,” Sara Jane said. She handed him what appeared to be a scrapbook. “Raphael- he wrote when he can. Taught me some basic codes, would send out letters whenever you’d leave a town. Never left a return address, but…” Jeremy flipped through the pages, moving to sit on the small bed. The letters were all coded but appeared to be about how much Raphael missed Sara Jane. Updates on Jeremy’s growth. Letters from a father to his lover and son’s mother. 

One page jumped out to him, though. “I remember this,” he said, running his fingers against the paper. It was a simple drawing of a young boy, holding a catcher’s mitt, and a taller man next to him. “I drew this after Dad took me to my first baseball game, for my eighth birthday. I thought I lost the drawing after we skipped town, but- he sent them to you?”

Sara Jane nodded. “And I kept them all. Oh, honey, the day I first heard your voice on the phone- Mikey can tell you, I damn near fell over. You sounded so happy, and even if I couldn’t see you, that’s all a mother wants.” Jeremy leaned against her and she shut the book. “That’s all a mother wants, sweetie. To see her kids be safe and happy.” 

“I am, Ma,” he assured her. “I promise.” 

They sat like that for a while, with Sara Jane commenting on various letters and drawings in the scrapbook. Apparently, Raphael sent her money when he could- more frequently now that Mann Co. paid so well. She also had a rough idea of their current occupations. “I figure, if you and your father are working for the same company- with his skills, there’s gotta be a whole lot of nonsense going on out in that desert.” Jeremy laughed at that because she wasn’t wrong. “But I also figure since he raised you right, he’ll keep the both of you safe.” 

“I keep him safe too, don’t worry,” Jeremy added. “Uh- listen, it’s touching and all you kept the crib, but I don’t have to sleep in it, right?” 

They both had a good chuckle over that. Their laughs were in perfect harmony. 

. . .

The next two days were a mix of learning the family history and exploring Boston. It was the offseason, so there weren’t any games going on at Fenway, but Jeremy still got a picture in front of the park. Sara Jane took the pair to a restaurant that served “the best damn clam chowder in the contiguous United States.” Which, incidentally, led them to discover Jeremy was allergic to clams. Thankfully they didn’t have to go to the hospital- he just sort of immediately got sick before it passed- but it did suck.

It was damn good chowder, though. 

They went down to the harbor where the Boston Tea Party happened. It was crowded with people, resulting in them not staying long. Jeremy was a bit better with crowds than Raphael, but neither was great with them. Came with the job. Getting overpriced memorabilia from a nearby gift shop, though, went over much more smoothly. 

When not out on the town, Sara Jane dug out more scrapbooks and photo albums, catching Raphael up on what his stepsons had been up to. She showed Jeremy pictures from Ricky’s first school play to Scott opening up his butcher shop. Graduation pictures, wedding pictures, baby pictures- it was all there, and Jeremy devoured it. He wanted to know these people. He wanted to know his family. And he did. He learned about Michael’s stint in the Navy, Melvin meeting his wife, how Bobby’s son could dribble a basketball for twenty minutes straight. He learned about how his parents met. How Raphael loved each of Sara Jane’s children, even if they weren’t biologically his. How Jeremy wasn’t planned- few of the kids were - but they were both so, so happy to realize he was coming. 

He also learned that, while diner food would remain the undisputed king, homemade meatloaf came pretty close. 

. . .

The only problem came when it was time to leave. It wasn’t that Jeremy didn’t want to return to work, or leave his Ma behind. Sara Jane wasn’t even torn up over losing her son and lover again. It just felt like there was so much left to say, to do. There was uncertainty as to when they’d be able to return. “We get time off for Smissmas, I know that’s months away but I’ll be here, I promise,” Jeremy swore, hugging Sara Jane for the eighth time. 

“You better,” she said, squeezing him tightly. “You have 25 years worth of gifts to catch up on, not to mention birthday gifts-”

“Ma, you don’t have to go that far,” he whined. He was touched, sure, but the thought of that much luggage was truly frightening. Oh God, he was going to have to get gifts for everybody, wasn’t he? What do kids even want for Smissmas? 

“Hush, let me spoil my baby,” Sara Jane told him, kissing his cheek. “Oh, Jeremy…” 

Jeremy nodded. “I know, but I’ll call. I’ll write, too. Send pictures if I can.” 

“I’ll make sure he does,” Raphael assured her. Sara Jane stood to kiss his lips, with Jeremy looking away pointedly. “You have my word, ma petite chou-fleur.” 

“Alright, alright- now get going, I don’t want you two missing your flight. That boss of yours sounds like she’ll tear you both a new one if you’re late,” Sara Jane said, shooing them away. “Love you boys!” 

“I love you too, Ma!” Jeremy shouted back, for the very first time. 

The drive back to the airport was quiet. Jeremy stared out the window, watching his hometown- he had a hometown- pass by. “Hey, dad?” he asked, still looking outside. Raphael grunted to acknowledge he was listening. “One of these days, our contracts with Mann Co. are gonna expire. We’re gonna have to find new jobs.” 

“Yes, that’s correct,” Raphael said. He tapped a rhythm against the steering wheel. 

“And-and I was thinking when that time comes… maybe we could come back to Boston. Find some gigs out here,” Jeremy suggested. 

Raphael sighed. “Unfortunately, being a spy means that you don’t have the option of retiring, Jeremy. Not until you’re unable to complete your job. At that point, though, you’ve probably died a dozen times over,” he explained. “Even if I could retire, settling down somewhere so close to people I care about- I would still have enemies.” 

“Right. ‘Course,” Jeremy said. “It’s OK.” 

“That being said,” Raphael continued, “you have the luxury of youth and not being tied down to such a career. If you want to find a job in Boston after we finish with RED, there’s nothing stopping you.” 

“But people will still be after me, since I’m your son. And you wouldn’t be around.”

“Every child leaves their parents someday. And you’re strong, Jeremy. You can protect yourself and your family.” Raphael smiled. “I don’t believe Sara Jane needs much protecting, but I do worry.” 

Jeremy laughed. “I mean, did ya see the muscles on Scott and Michael? Guys can probably bench press a tractor!” 

They both chuckled before settling into quietude. Eventually, though, Jeremy had to break the silence. His voice was barely above a whisper. “I love you.” 

“I love you too, mon lapin.”

“...so your nickname for Ma is fucking ‘little cauliflower?’ What the hell, Dad?”