#anyways Im trying to help everytime Im home and not at work I cook for her and try to distract her from stressful episodes bc it seems to

[light-koe-pinsky]

.

[sweet1delusi0ns]

Naruto boys calling you ma’am ──☆*:・ﾟ

!Slightly suggestive!

Characters: Naruto🦊,sasuke🗡️,Itachi🥀, kakashi🍃, kiba🐺, shikamaru🀄️,shino🪲,neji🎋,Lee🥋,choji🍥,gaara⏳,kankuro🪆

Naruto🦊-*

He’s sassy so ofc he’s gunna piss you off by calling you “ma’am” making you feel old. Normally when you scold him over stupid things he refers to you as that-

“Did you think about how dangerous that is?!” “No ma’am!” “use your little head before doing something dumb!” “Yes ma’am!” “ok stop with the ma’am I feel like a teacher scolding a bad student” “what you gunna smack me with a ruler?” Rolls eyes “I will if you don’t keep quiet!” “Whatever you say! Ma’am~” “I’ll be back with the ruler.” “WHAT?!”

Sasuke🗡️-*

He uses it nonchalantly or when he’s being goofy. Like everytime he leaves home you always say “be safe baby” and he always responds with “yes ma’am.” In a serious tone. He knows you worry that one day he may not come back so he must reassure you!

“Be safe Sasuke. I expect you home by 10!” “Yes ma’am, i will I promise. I must go now! I’ll see you at dinner darling” you whisper “it’s cute when you call me that” right before he closes the door (he heard it anyways)

Itachi🥀-*

He is such a good boyfriend honestly. He’s the kind of guy to do little tasks for you when you ask. So normally when your to lazy all you gotta do is ask him to do it instead!

“Tachi, can you please get me some more water?” “Yes ma’am!!!” Very rare times you ask him to do something without him responding with a “yes ma’am~”

Kakashi🍃-*

His mouth gets himself in trouble, sometimes he says things that could be viewed a different way without realizing it. For example he once said you remind him of a frog. I don’t know how it’s a compliment but he meant it as one…which obviously you didn’t know

“ARE YOU CALLING ME AN UGLY FROG KASHI?!” “N-no ma’am! That’s not what I mea-” “NO I KNOW WHAT YOU MEANNNN! YOU THINK IM SLIMEY TOAD” you start smiling once you realize how silly this really is “no I swear I meant it in a nice way!!!” “WELL-…did you call me ma’am?” “Uhm…depends do you not like it” you chuckle “no I don’t mind, it’s cute.” He lets out a sigh of relief “well I guess I’ll call you that more often?~”

Kiba🐺-*

Like kakashi his mouth gets him in trouble, exept Kiba does it on purpose to try and get a rise out of you he likes it when your rough ofc that means he just teases as much as possible, but then he tries acting all innocent

He’s on his knees directly infront of your legs waiting for you to look at him “I know what your doing Kiba. It’s not gunna work” he flashes the puppy eyes “well I’m not doing anything y/n🥺” “so your serious not trying to get a rise out of me?” “Noooo ma’am” you grab his face with your hand rather aggressively“is this want you want puppy?” A very quiet “Yes” could be heard from him

Shikamaru🀄️-*

He only calls you ma’am when you nag him about doing chores or helping you cook, he knows he can’t say no but “maam” is his only way of back talk

“Hey Shika be a dear and take out the trash” “ahhh yes anything for you ma’am.” He responded in the most sarcastic voice he could make “watch that tone babe!” “Yeah yeah whatever, such a pain” “I’ll show you pain.” A water bottle was soon thrown directly at his head LOL

Shino🪲-*

Call me weird but I feel like if he was going to call you something like that he would call you mistress instead but that’s for another time! When he does call you ma’am it’s mostly because he admires your leadership. You guys would be testing battle strategy and when you command him into a certain position you could here his cheerful “yes ma’am” while he runs into position

Neji🎋-*

He only uses it to get out of trouble actually. When he does something he isn’t supposed to he tries lying abt what he did

“Neji. Were you in my drawers?” “What!!! No ma’am that is absurd I would never dig through your shirt drawer!” You look at him with a blank stare “I never said it was my shirt drawer. Time to fess up pretty.” He sighs loudly. “Fine yes. But only because I missed your scent!!!” “Awwwww…kinda creepy but cute!!”

Lee🥋-*

Your like his own personal Inspirator. You give him pep talk like every single day and being the energy ball he is he is so hyped to hear about it

“Are you gunna train hard today?” “Yes ma’am!” “And you going to be proud of yourself no matter what?!” “Yes ma’am!!!!!” “Are you not gunna over work yourself for me?” “YES MA’AM!!!!”

Choji🍥-*

Again he takes your authority very seriously! So ma’am is fitting when your taking charge of every day things. Even if your not trying to be all serious he will always respect your power but he also looks to you for guidance

“Hey handsome you said you needed me?” “Yes y/n-chan. I figured you could help me with this?” You sigh “the only way I’ll be of help is if you do what I tell you too, can you…do that?” “Yes ma’am! I’m a very good listener!” You giggle “cute now let’s get started”

Gaara⏳-*

He has mommy issues and your strong and independent ofc he’s gunna call you names like that and ask for you to take care of him?! You love babying him anyways but it’s always so cute when he’s had a rough day mentally wise and the first thing he does is go to you

“Y/n, may we please have some alone time…” he asked shyly “of course rose, bad mental day?” You open your arms to him “yes ma’am. It was hard today.” He comments before hopping in your arms waiting for you to make everything better

Kankuro🪆-*

He calls you ma’am when your all mad at him for being bratty “but I was just checking out your new pants!” “You expect me to believe that you were just looking at my pants and not my ass?” “Yes ma’am” kinda like Kiba he wants you to be rough with him ok. He’s just trying to tease so you do something about it which you don’t because your strong, and it’s funner to just calling him a brat and watching him squirm at the insults



[blxetsi]

do you write for zeke? if so could you please do some boyfriend!zeke (modern au) hcs? thanks🥺

tysm for requesting !!!

modern zeke jaeger dating headcanons

lowercase intended !

zeke jaeger x gn!reader

- biggest tease ever.

- i think you two wouldve started off as friends to lovers yk 😌✨

- v funny v teasing will make fun of you no matter what

- but its all lighthearted and you can genuinely tell hes joking and doesnt mean what he says

- hes a coffee person. all the way.

- almost always seen with a coffee in his hand

- after you keep stealing sips of whatever hes got he finally just caves in and will bring you your own drink whenever he sees you

- if you dont drink coffee, but prefer a sugary drink or something he'll tease you about it

- hes a very relaxed person and doesnt get jealous, hes not someone that will go balistic and get angry when you hug a friend he doesnt know or whatever

- also would be really cool with your exes if youre cool with them, like "oh yeah i remember you telling me abt them, congrats on your engagement btw" just a very civil man

- if he does have insecurities about your relationship he just kind of, wont say anything ???

- not that he doesnt want to he just doesnt know how to bring it up

- bae pls learn how to talk abt your feelings 😁👍

- anyways after a little bit youll notice somethings wrong, but he'll try and act "strong" bc thats what he thinks hes supposed to be for you

- baby no u can be vulnerable its okay 😐🤚

- he finally lets everything go and has a really long and progressive conversation with you about everything, and you guys work it all out !

- you assure him its okay to be honest and that hes always welcome to talk to you about how hes feeling and his heart just swells

- im also a firm believer in that zeke genuinely doesnt care what you look like, if he finds you cool he finds you cool, he dgaf

- poc ?? he loves you. plus sized ?? he loves you.

- if you even THINK of being like "lol im insecure" hes shutting it down and talking abt how beautiful he finds you

- hes also someone that likes to push you out of your comfort zone, but in baby steps ?? like hes not going to force you to do something when you say "zeke im genuinely not comfortable with this" but if youre very shy he'll try and help you kind of,, not be as shy (hopefully this makes sense 😁👍)

- also loves to cook with you.

- his favourite types of dates are just when you two go to each others' homes and just cook dinner together ?? maybe drink some wine while you chop vegetables and work together (if you drink obv, if you dont he wont drink either even if you say its okay)

- he thinks it makes the food taste better because "it was made with our love" yeah ok ig 🙄🙏

- his family is really cool !! his dads a doctor and his step moms a social worker, and theyre really nice people !! his younger brother is in college but after a while he grows to love you like a sibling

- his mom lives a couple hours away, so he only gets to see her during holidays, but shes a very kind woman who owns an art shop !

- hes a very family oriented man, and really likes that you like his family and vice versa, he thinks its really important that his s/o and family get along

- when hes with you he sees himself being with you for the long run, im talking marriage and kids (if thats what you want) but definitely marriage

- if you two had different friend groups i think it would be hard for either of you to kind of fit in with each others friends, but after a while you two get the hang of it and it gets easier to see them !!

- is the kind of guy who'll wake you up with kisses on your cheek 🤩

- also likes to spoon you or have your head on his chest. will NOT be the baby spoon no matter what.

- also the kind of guy who dramatically stretches and yawns in the morning

- likes it when you hold his hand, even if you guys are just sitting together on the couch watching something, its so simple and subtle but it makes him really happy

- if you have an office at home that you work in a lot, he'll come and check on you when it gets late. will just rub and pat your head and ask what youre working on, and ask if youll be done soon

- if youre stressing on something that needs to be done THAT NIGHT he understands and will just leave you to it

- when you come to bed late it wakes him up but hes glad it does bc then he can pull you into his arms 😌✨

- zeke has very warm hands, to the point where sometimes theyre sweaty and clammy, so when you have a stomach ache or cramps he has no problem just laying down behind you and rubbing your stomach where it hurts

- if you have a weird interest or hobby he wont discourage it as long as its not hurting you or anybody else, he'll try and get into it to but if he cant no harm done, he'll respect it and you

- i think he would have some acne scars on his cheeks from highschool (puberty am i right 🙄😤⁉️) and thats one of the reasons why he has a beard, just to make it hard to see

- its mostly bc hes cool though, and although he started growing it out BECAUSE he found the scarring weird, as hes gotten older he just doest care anymore

- if you think he looks hot clean shaven he'll do it for u, and he loves the compliments you give him

- zeke is the kind of guy that will flip through the tabloid magazines at checkout

- "babe did you know that jennifer lawrence has a dark secret ??" "i- i did not 😁"

- also the kind of guy that will laugh if he sees kids falling in public

- if he was a father he'd help his kid up obviously, but would do it while giggling the whole time

- has dad handwriting (u know what im talking about)

- everytime he calls his brother he answers with "hey asshole" ??? brotherly love 🙈✨

- is very into horror films, but ONLY good ones

- so like hereditary, midsommar, and black swan are some ones he loves

- the kind of guy that has captain crunch for breakfast every morning

- theres this guy at the law firm he works at that he has a "rivalry" of sorts with, his names levi and from what youve been told hes actually very intimidating ??

- loves to read and will read to you if you ask, would have you in between his legs with your back to his chest on the bed, and he'd have one hand in yours and the other holding whatever book you choose

- zeke needs to be in complete darkness to sleep but needs to have a room as bright as possible to be productive. so every morning after he stretches and gets out of bed hes immediately opening his curtains and letting light into the room because "its the only way he'll actually get ready"

- if he was ever to pop the question he'd do it alone at a very mundane time, just like "wow this is the moment" and ask you to marry him. doesnt matter if he has a ring or not, hes ready, and he realizes this, and he finds the beauty in just doing something so simple with you. hes content and happy, and you make him see life in things he hasnt before, and hes ready for the commitment that comes with marriage, and hes in love with you.

hope u all enjoyed 🤩🤩🤩 asks r open so request if ud like !!! okay love u all stay safe 🤩

[orbitvenus]

this post is inspired by this reblog of mine <33 check it if you want to!!

Pairing: timeskip!Tendou x fem!Reader

Genre: fluff and drabble

Warning: grammar errors, its uhhh cheesy ig, bland dialogues because I suck at them, ooc??? and maybe some swearing

I hope this won't plop😭 also someone help me how to describe other gestures besides the forehead kisses,knuckle kisses and hugs that I always include in my writings

You and Tendou have been together for a long time. When he asked you to join and live with him in Paris, you immediately said yes knowing you'll be fine with him even though you have to leave your home country behind. Moving to another country is pretty tough at first, but slowly the two of you began to adjust and create a routine.

Now, you and tendou are about to celebrate your anniversary. He asked you to dress up prettily. You asked why he just smiled and said this anniversary is much special so its important. You raised your eyebrows as if every anniversary you had with him wasn't special. To you all the anniversaries you had were always special, each one is unique filled with happy memories and for this year you still look forward to what he had prepared.

He told you he will be picking you up later while he will be doing some business. He pulled you close to him and nuzzled his head to your neck like a cat which made you chuckle.

'Keep safe okay.'

'Yes yes no worries babe.' He spoke, muffled because he's still nuzzled on your neck.

He pulled away and looked at you lovingly before leaving. You stood there dumbfounded until the door is shut. He always looks at you with adoration that you never fail to send back at him but you noticed that his behavior today is....quiet weird. You decided to shrug it off.

You took a shower and stepped out to go to your bedroom. In your bed is a box with a note that came none other than from Satori.

'wear this for me.'

-satori♡

You smiled and opened the lid of the box. You pulled out the dress and admired it. Realizing it was the dress you mentioned to him that you've been dying to get. You felt fuzzy and warm with your heart fluttering in your chest realizing he remembered it and got it for you. You made a mental note for yourself to repay him. Snapping out of your daze, you hurriedly dressed up yourself as you saw the clock nearing to the time where Satori promised you to pick you up.

You were still trying to wear your shoes when you heard knocks behind your apartment's door. After finally wearing your shoes, you turned the doorknob and met your boyfriend all dressed up as you.

'There's my baby, I knew it would look perfect on you.'

His words always make you blush even though you two are no longer teenagers.

'Thanks you too.'

You walked near him and fixed his collar, inhaling his perfume as you come closer. You rested your hands on his chest. Taking a look at his form, he looks handsome as ever.

'Babe if you kept staring at me I will definitely melt.'

He teasingly commented. You playfully rolled your eyes at him and grabbed his hand to leave even if you don't have any idea where he will take you.

'Lets go now, don't want us to be late yeah?'

You were met with the breeze coming from the sea while walking, hands in hands with Tendou. Looking around the place is quiet with only the two of you walking towards a boat. The boat is decorated with flowers and battery operated candles we don't want any incidents to happen don't we. Tendou was first to step inside the small boat and held out his hand.

'Hop in my lady~'

He said it while looking at your eyes and grinning. You took it and stepped in with him while he's keeping the boat steady.

'Careful..careful okay there'

You got in and he gestured you to sit down. You sat opposite of your boyfriend and beside you is a picnic basket with wine and two wine glasses along with some food inside. Satori pushed the boat so it will move further to the sea and began rowing. While he was rowing you took the time to admire everything including him. He's still pretty muscular even if he already quitted volleyball but he continued to maintain his physique by exercising from time to time. The sun is beginning to set, casting the skies a beautiful orange glow.

Satori stopped rowing the boat and looked at you. Seeing that awe struck expression in your face, he knew he succeeded again. You felt his eyes on you and faced your body towards him.

'So....where did you learn how to row?'

'One of the locals who rents boats taught me how, to be honest I thought it was gonna be easy but I was wrong.'

You laughed lightly and continued to chat with him. While talking you two also started to drink the wine and eat the food that was prepared on a small table he brought out.

The amount of happiness you felt at this moment will never compare when you celebrated your first anniversary together. You continued laughing with Tendou when a latern caught your attention. You stopped and observed. Satori also kept quiet to observe you to see how you will react to his surprise.

It already got dark, luckily the candles and the street lamps are kept the place illuminated. That later changed when the laterns began to come out and light up the sky. Your eyes followed the laterns. At that moment it was so beautiful, you don't know if its a coincidence or part of your boyfriends plan.

You felt as if you were in the scene from Tangled. You were far too amazed to even notice your boyfriend. While you were excitedly admiring what he prepared, he took his time to prepare himself on the question he's been dying to tell you.

He knew it's about time for you to know when he was sleeping beside you one night.

He was just staring at the ceiling and he can't sleep while you were peacefully sleeping on top of him. He looked at you and realized after all you two have been through you still stuck with him. He remembered how you listened and comforted him from his insecurities. How you greeted him with a hug everytime he returns home from work. He even remembered how you kept practicing to cook for him. He remembered how he met you and how you got together with him. Everything, you're always there with him. He doesn't want to let you go and felt that he needs to confirm that you and him will be with each other forever.

He looked at the calendar besides him and saw your anniversary date. He thought about it and realized he had enough money to buy you the ring you wanted. Funny how it seems the universe is inclined with his intentions. He will have to start planning to propose to you but first he needs his sleep while keeping his arms around you.

'Y/n...'

'Hmmm?'

You responded but still enraptured by floating lanterns. He coughed and caught your attention.

'I know it was a big decision when I asked you back then to come with me here in Paris. I was prepared to hear your rejection back then but your excited yes shocked me a little.......'

He continued to say what he had always wanted to say to you. You started to tear up feeling overwhelmed by his confession. Somehow this scenario feels oddly similar to his first confession to you and hit you with nostalgia.

'Now I wanted to ask you to um...'

He felt flustered and his heart beating. He sighed before continuing and brought out a small box out of his pocket. He placed it on his palm and slowly opened it. Now is the time to ask the big question.

'Y/n L/n will you marry-'

'Yes!'

You happily interrupted him and threw your arms around him, burying your face to his neck to avoid seeing you in tears. Tendou is shocked and happy at the same time now that you said yes, you still have to wear the ring which you haven't done yet. He was about to take your hands and slid it on your finger when you hugged him.

He patted your back and smiled also starting to feel his tears build up when he realized you were crying.

'Hey- come on now I don't want to see you crying.'

He shushed you softly. You calmed down and backed off. You were still wiping your tears off you cheeks with your other hand when he slid the ring on your finger. You kept rubbing until you peeked your eyes open and saw the ring.

The tears began to build up again and you cried. Thinking what you did to deserve such man like him, he surprised you too much today you can't help but feel overflowing joy and love. You try to form words but the hiccups are preventing you and trying your best to wipe off the endless tears from your eyes.

Your attempt to dry them off fail until you felt Satori your now fiancé, use his handkerchief to help you. You finally looked at him through blurry eyes and saw how he was also crying while looking at you. Your hand reached out to his face to dry his tears.

He held your hand on his face and brought it near his lips to kiss your ring. His gesture made you cry harder.

'Damn it Satori! Stop making me cry you dummy.'

You finally spoke again. You made him laugh and stop his tears. Tendou tried to help you clear the tears from your cheeks again until its gone.

When you two both calmed down, he pressed his forehead against yours and connected his lips to yours while both of his hands are cupping each sides of your face. The kiss made you feel like fireworks soaring in the sky. He stopped and murmured against your lips.

'I love you so so much, thank you for being with me and loving me I promise to cherish you for eternity my paradise.'

'I love you so much too Satori...more than you would ever know.'

He let out laugh from your words. His laugh made you feel giddy. His yours and you are his officially.

'You know babe our setting really reminds me of that scene from Tangled.'

'Well...where did you think I got the inspiration from?'

Notes:duck im tired im also on low battery bye now- I have to rush the ending because I was at like....5% 😭😭😭 anyway thank you for reading!! Feel free to like and reblog if you like it <33

content by @dreamingkita pls do not repost or plagiarize or else I will hunt you❗

[moons-and-stars-and-shit]

Am I in need of an absolute masterpiece from you? Yes. Ok so another chocolate but this time it’s with Osamu... hear me out ok... couples cooking class. I KNOW OSAMU CAN COOK OK but like say i was able to grab a free class and now we’re at the class scene,, and osamu do be jealous AHAHAHAH the instructor is vv HOt and I wouldn’t take my eyes off him (HAHAHA SHOULD I INSERT IWAIZUMI- IM KIDDING) anyways osamu gets jealous that i’ve been staring at the instructor and not making the food,, so then osamu storms out with u in his hand and drives to onigiri miya for a private cooking class on making heart shaped onigiri and then hes like “im way hotter and better than the instructor,” and grumbles in angy tiny baby mode AHAHAHHA DOES THIS MAKE SENSE hopefully my mentions work this time :(

Ah yes the big brained bitch has returned

Love this idea btw

🍫 with Osamu for @iwaplant

Jealousy

Osamu didn't know why he was here, oh yeah you had gotten a free cooking class from your job, but you didn't want to go alone because “your anxious ass would feel awkward” your words not his. So here he was standing next to you at a counter waiting for this cooking class to start. After a while the instructor came in, and lets just say he looked a lot like a particular #4 ace from Aoba Johsai who you were particularly fond of 👀 . Everytime Osamu turned to look at you he caught you STARING at this fine ass man. Now he knows you would never do anything but he couldn't help but feel jealous? Is that what he was feeling? Well whatever it was he didnt like it. He finally snapped when the instructor had walked over to help you fold the filling into the dumpling dough. “Omg y/n we forgot to water the dishes and feed the walls we better get home like asap” he said grabbing your hand and storming out the building. You both had gotten into the car, you were feeling a little bummed out cause you actually wanted to cook something for once, but then osamu pulled up to Onigiri Miya. “Osamu what are we doing here?” you asked. “Congratulations y/n you have one a free cooking class with your beloved boyfriend and hopefully future husband” you laughed at his little remark before going inside the restaurant

He was showing you how to make his famous onigiri when you had the brilliant idea to make them heart shaped. “Cmon Samu where's your valentines day spirit” “fine but only cause i love ya” you couldn't help but catch the quiet “i bet that instructor wouldn't have let you make heart shaped dumplings”. The rest of this so called class was filled with nothing but laughs and the occasional remarks on how “i'm a better cook than that iwa wannabe will ever be” or “he wasn't even that hot...im hotter anyways”. Eventually you had made a bunch of heart onigiris with all kinds of different flavors. Osamu actually ended up stealing your idea and sold heart shaped onigiri on valentines day. Oop and guess who walked into the store...THE INSTRUCTOR FROM THE COOKING CLASS!!! Osamu greeted him bitterly with a “Hello sir would you like to try our limited edition heart onigiri that me and my GIRLFRIEND made TOGETHER because we are a COUPLE” the poor man left because he felt so attacked 💔

[gagmebucky]

Hi, I just really wanted to rant about something and I don’t really want to talk about it with anyone I know irl so…

My dad is just a normal guy in every sense of the word, good and bad. One thing that’s bothered me for a while now is how I recognized he talks to my mom and while it’s not degrading, it’s just entitled and annoying.

Since my brother and I were born, she quit her job to take care of us so he’s been the one primarily earning money. This arrangement hasn’t put our family in any type of financial jeopardy at all, we live in a nice house in a nice area and his job combined with the money he makes from his previous service in the military makes him around 150k a year. One thing I’d like to note is that he works a normal 8 to 5 job. But for a year or so the majority of his company has switched to a12 hours day so they get a three day weekend every week.

Now I know you may be wondering what money has to do with any of this and I promise that I’ll get to that part I’m just really angry and need to get this all off of my chest.

Anyways, my mom started working again 2-3 years ago at his request and now she works AND does all the stereotypical motherly things (cooks dinner, cleans, any other odd jobs that need to be done around the house)

All the while my mom has been doing this, my dad does his 12 hour days (including lunch in those 12 hours) and he’s allowed to take 10 minute breaks and most often times watch tv in the background while he’s working (he’s been working from home since COVID and doesn’t have any plans to go back since his job is mostly on the computer anyways other than a couple in-person meetings a month)

After my dad is done with work, he basically retires for the night and just watches tv while waiting for mom to serve him whatever food or leftovers she’s put on a plate for him.

Now, I get to the current issue.

My mom doesn’t ask for much or even anything from him in terms of helping her. But there are just some things that make me angry when he says them.

In the past couple of weeks for pretty much the 1st consistent time since March, my dad started walking and exercising again which he does outside or in the garage. My father has naturally oily skin, and even if he didn’t, he is exercising so his skin will be sticky and sweaty! RIGHT!?!?!

However when my mom brought it up a couple days ago she didn’t even say what we both were thinking which was YOU STINK AND ARE THEREFORE MAKING THE HOUSE STINK!!!

Instead, she politely asked if he would take a shower since he worked out and specificied that she was telling him this out of love without even mentioning him stinking up the house or more specifically the kitchen that he was in.

Instead of understanding that exercise makes you sweat and sweat makes you smell, he snarkelly shot back, that he had something to tell her out of love too. And although he trailed off with a cocky laugh, the context of the situation and his numerous past suggestions obviously implied that he was talking about my mom’s weight.

I would like to specify that my mother is not obese or unhealthy, in fact she eats considerably less junk food than he does. And even if she was, it did not prompt my dad making that “joke”.

Now fast forward a few minutes, my mom and I left to go grocery shopping for the food she would make for him without him even having to lift a finger. She ranted to me that him needing to take a shower had nothing to do with her weight. From what she was saying I could tell that she wasn’t that angry about what he said about her weight, but more so about him deflecting the conversation from his smellyness to her (which is something he does often so he doesn’t look like the “bad guy”)

Now to today, my father once again “joked” with my mom when asked if he would honestly like to help her blow dry her hair (I say honestly because she wanted his honest opinion on whether he would like to do it or not, and it was something she never really needs help with but she wanted to spend time with him) he said that he needs to consult the “guy’s handbook” to figure out if that was a trick question. (My father is 55 years old and they’ve been married for 30 something years)

I’m sure there’s a psychological reason why I got so angry at him but I’m not going to settle that I was once again tired that he treated my mom like crap despite her doing everything for him. So I told him that my mom was being serious and it wasn’t a trick question.

I (kinda) knew that he knew this, and was trying to make a joke. But explaining it was my version of the whole “I don’t understand your ‘joke’ please explain it to me” in an attempt to discourage him from making it again.

But in an event that I would have seen coming if I wasn’t so angry, it didn’t work and he instead got mad at me. Recognizing that I could have handled the situation better, I just apologized however I was crying because of his rant that I wasn’t a part of the conversation and shouldn’t have stepped in . (I normally wouldn’t be so sensitive but for some reason it’s like everytime I have a family argument it’s that time of the month so I’m emotionally sensitive)

I retreated back into my room and apparently I wasn’t crying as quietly as I thought I was because be he then knocked on my door, then demanded that I come out and “spend time with him” so he could know what was wrong.

Now, I thought this was code for I’m going to apologize, but no… he literally didn’t understand that his words hurt my feelings and demanded that I tell him what was “really” wrong as if him yelling at me wasn’t a good enough reason to be crying.

After curtly telling him what was wrong in so many words as to not offend him further. He dryly apologized before defending himself and saying that it wasn’t his fault that I got angry and he was just trying to make a joke that he insisted would apparently be funny if I didn’t cut in. Then he dryly promised that he would try to treat my mother nicer and not make as many “jokes” because he can tell how much it affects me.

There is probably more to the story that I forgot to leave out. And I kinda want to know if I’m in the wrong in the situation or not. And reading back over this i am definitely biased but if you can manage to remove the emotion from my words then those are honestly the facts about what happened.

I recognize that I am selfish, he actually told me that one, but looking back over my life I know that I have been rude when “defending” my mom. I put it in quotations because my mom doesn’t need defending and she is more than capable to speaking up when there’s a big problem.

But I just get annoyed at people when they rudely deny her some of the smaller things she requests like help blow drying her hair and things she won’t insist on them helping on. I’d understand if kindly said no thanks or I can’t do it right now, but he just had to joke about it and be curt in his response for no reason.

All in all I’m just so angry that it is impossible for him to acknowledge what he did wrong without defending that actions that make someone sad or angry in the first place.

But anyways, I am extremely sorry for the rant and writing so much and I honestly don’t blame you if you didn’t even read all of this. I just wanted to tell someone and I love how your blog is so open and judgement free and you don’t act like you have all the answers of what is right or wrong but you just give your opinion and help when you can. Thanks so much for listening (reading, really) and I appreciate you so much!

baby, you didn’t do ANYTHING wrong. you are the opposite of selfish — your dad was being a fucking dick to your mom and you stood up for her. you had every right to be angry, and if i were you, i would’ve said some low blow, disrespectful, kick-me-out-of-the-house ass shit.

i think (respectfully) you’re over analyzing yourself to find fault in yourself when it isn’t really there in my opinion. he’s complaining that you’re rude when he was the rude one and you literally just defending your mom. being rude is like “you stinky piece of shit, im gonna fucking drown you in bleach and lets see you make another fuckin comment BITCH”

but you did not do that therefore his argument is invalid. i can only say so much because it’s you in the thick of it but it definitely seems like your dad’s arrogant and entitled personality is so overbearing that it makes you be harder on yourself than you should be. i think, legally, you should get hit him once with a bat, non lethally of course (unless….. haha…?). i just know personally dealing with that personality type can create a LOT of contained anger.

anyway, im rly sorry you have to deal w him. i feel like you have a lot of weight on your shoulders and you seem so sweet and nice and you do not deserve to have to give your energy to that :(

[thebluenebula]

Masterlist

Day 1

Day 2

Day 3

Day 4 (Part 1)

A New Bat: Day 4

(Part 2)

Honestly I didn't want to move but I did. We walked out of the range just in time to see Jay speed out of the cave, then we took a staircase back up and popped out from behind a bookshelf in a library. Dick was lying on a nearby chair talking to Babs. "Hey."

"Hey." Kate and I said in unison.

"What we're you two up to in the cave?" Dick asked, clearly suspicious.

"I don't think that any of your business Dick." Babs commented.

"I agree with Babs." Kate smirked.

Dick looked to me. "So, what do you think of the Bat-cave?"

"Its cool." I quickly replied. "Odd though."

"The Bat-cave is very odd." Babs agreed.

Dick's phone beeped and he looked at it. "Dinners ready."

"What is it?" Kate asked.

"Let's find out." He stood up.

As Kate and Babs headed for the door I whispered to Dick. "Would it be okay if I eat in my room?"

He smiled at me. "Of course. You don't have to ask, just grab a plate and head up."

"Thanks." I followed Dick out of the library.

We walked into the kitchen and saw Alfred preping plates of food. "Hello Alfred." Dick greeted him.

"Hello, I'm just finishing preparing the meals."

"Ashleigh's just gonna grab a plate and head to her room." Dick said.

"Of course, Master Dick."

Kate handed me over a plate. "Or you could come with me, if you want. I'm heading out to the gazebo. I've been cooped up in the cave all day I could use some fresh air."

"Yeah sure." I quickly agreed.

Dick looked at me. "I'll talk you later."

"See you later." Babs said.

I nodded at him. Kate grabbed her plate and put her hand on my shoulder and we headed towards the door. Kate stopped. "Oh Alfred, Jays gone out. I don't think he'll back anytime soon."

"Thank you, Miss Kate. I will leave his wrap in the fridge for him."

"Speaking of," Dick said. "Shouldn't B be home soon."

"He said he would be Master Dick." Alfred replied as Kate and I walked out.

We walked through the garden. It was beautiful. Everything neatly taken care of. We sat down inside a white painted gazebo, the sun shined in on us. Behind the gazebo was a large brick wall, largely covered in brightly coloured graffiti art.

"The sun's nice to see." Kate commented.

"Oh yeah." I looked up at the sky, quickly looking back down when the sun caught my gaze. "We never did see too much of it on Ireland."

"Is it a rainy as they say?"

"Oh yeah, but the rain can be nice." I shrugged. "At least I think so anyway."

"Then don't worry." Kate laughed. "It rains plenty in Gotham."

Kate took a bite of her food. A wrap. I looked at my own plate. A chicken wrap. Plenty on it. I took a bite. Gorgeous, same as all Alfred's meals it would seem.

"Do you need to go clothes shopping?"

"Hmm." Without thinking, I tried to talk but my mouth full of food. Kate giggled at my failed attempt to speak. I swallowed the food before trying to speak again. "What?"

"You said you only had a few skirts. If you need to go clothes shopping I can bring you." She gestured to herself. "I'm no style guru, that's Steph and Dick's department, but I like to think im not the worst."

"I like your style."

"Thank you. So how about it then? Clothes shopping?"

"I'd love to but I think Bruce is bringing me furniture shopping over the weekend."

"I could tag along and we dip into a clothes shop."

"I really don't have a whole pile of money." I said honestly.

Kate pointed to the giant manor. "You are literally Bruce Wayne's child."

"Adopted, and I can't just ask him for money."

"Yes. You can." Kate emphasised each of the words. "He'd be more than happy to give you money for clothes shopping."

"I don't know. It just seems wrong. I mean I've only been here less than a week. It'd be rude."

Kate sighed. "Even if he wasn't okay with it, which he is absolutely is, by the way," Kate took out her wallet and put a couple of bills on the table. "I am."

I looked at the money. Five one hundred dollar bills. "I can't-"

"Take it." She insisted and slid it closer.

I hesitantly took the money and put it in my pocket. "Never hesitate to ask me or Bruce for money." Kate insisted. "Even it's for something simple like fast food or a video game. We're happy to give you some."

"Thank you, Kate, but-"

Kate leaned in. "No buts. End of story." Then she leaned back out. "Just if you need money for bullets, ask me, not Bruce. Jays has been asking him since he came back from the dead. He's convinced he'll break eventually."

"Okay." I laughed, it took a minute for what Kate had just said to register. "Jay was what now?"

Kate laughed. "That's a story for another day. Don't worry he brings it up quite often."

"Okay." I sat staring at her blankly for a moment. My brain was still processing what she had just told me.

"So," Kate broke the silence. "How are you enjoy your meal?"

"What? Oh yeah. Its nice." I took another bite of my wrap. "Is there anything Alfred can't cook?"

"If there is, we have yet to find it." Bruce said as he entered the gazebo.

Kate and I looked at Bruce with surprise. She must not have. heard him approach either. "Hey." Kate and I said in unison.

Bruce looked to me."A couple more boxes of yours came." He gestured back to the house. "I just left them in the entrance but Dick and I can bring them up to your room if you want."

"No. That's okay." I stood up. "I'll just throw my plate in and I'll bring them up."

"There's a couple boxes. You'll need a hand." Bruce insisted.

Kate swallowed the last piece of her wrap. "I'll help." She said, standing up and grabbed my plate off of me. "I'll throw these in and meet you two in the main hall." She walked off towards the house.

Bruce and I watched for a second before he started walking as well. "Come on." He said. I got up and followed him. "So did you and Kate talk?"

I silently gulped. "Yup."

"I'm sorry about that. I know what you said but we thought it'd help."

"It did. Thanks." I said. "Anything else like that I should know about?"

"No." Bruce smiled at me as we reached the back door. We walked through the house to the entrance hall. A stack of boxes sitting by the door and by them, stood Kate.

"Let's bring these up then." Bruce said, grabbing a stack of boxes.

"So how was work?" Kate asked him, grabbing another stack of boxes.

I grabbed the last stack then we started up the stairs. "Not too bad. I got that business with Lex Corp sorted out. Thank god."

"So no more late nights for a while?" Kate asked.

"For a while." Bruce said.

"So what's in the boxes?" Kate asked as we reached the third floor.

"Lego, and books mostly, some clothes and other trinkets from my old room."

"Only some clothes?" She asked.

"Most of my old clothes were torn or too small so I left them."

"Definitely bringing you clothes shopping then."

"Speaking of shopping, you still want to go furniture shopping this weekend?" Bruce asked.

"Yes. Absolutely." I quickly replied.

"How's Saturday sound?"

"Great."

"I'll join you and we can go clothes shopping. If that's okay?" Kate asked

Bruce look to me. "Is it?"

"Of course." I responded quickly.

"Also Bruce," Kate said. "You gotta have a serious talk with Ashleigh about money?"

Bruce glanced at her curiously "Why?"

"She didn't want to ask you for money for shopping."

"Oh." Bruce sounded surprised, then he grinned. "Ashleigh never be afraid to ask me for money."

"It's just, I've only been here a week. I don't want to push my luck." I said.

"Trust me. My kids are experts at pushing their luck. You couldn't be worse." Bruce assured me.

We stopped outside my room. "So who's gonna get the door?" Kate asked.

Bruce shifted the weight of the boxes to one arm and opened the door. We set the boxes down beside my bed.

"You need help unpacking?" Bruce asked.

"No. I should probably wait till I get furniture to unpack."

"Yeah." The two agreed.

"Hey." Bruce turned to Kate. "Alfred said Jays gone out. Do you know where?"

"He went to pick up Artemis and Bizarro. Why?"

"Just wondering. Artemis will keep him out of trouble anyway."

"He's in his twenties Bruce. You don't have to worry about him everytime he goes out."

"Regardless of his age, he's my kid, it's my job to worry about him." Bruce stated. "Plus it's Jason."

"Valid point." Kate agreed, then turned to me. "You said something about Legos right?"

"Yes." I looked at her curiously.

"You got any superhero ones?"

"A couple."

"Any of us?"

"I've got you, I said pointing at Bruce." Who smiled back at me. "The third Robin and Black Bat."

"I feel kinda hurt you don't have one of me." Kate joked.

"I missed out on Batwoman." I explained as I sat down the bed.

"Too bad." Kate said leaning against the wall.

"I didn't know they made ones of Cass." Bruce looked at me curiously.

"Oh they don't. I kinda just pieced her together from other figures."

"So you dismantle the little guys you get and make someone new?"

"Sometimes. Yes."

Bruce nodded. "Cool."

Kate looked at us. "So if I wanted to make one that looked like me, not Batwoman, like me me, I'd have to buy the sets with pieces that look like me."

"There's a website where you can just buy the pieces on there own."

"Handy." She commented. I yawned. "Late night?"

I nodded. "We watched a movie last night."

"We?"

"Bruce, Harper, Carrie, Duke, Dick, and I."

Kate looked to Bruce. "Not like you to stay up late, if you're not on patrol."

"Got in from the office late. Sat down and watched a movie with the kids."

Kate smiled at him then turned to me. "You must be tired then?"

"Yeah." I agreed. "I should probably go to sleep."

Bruce nodded. "We'll see you in the morning." The two headed for the door but stopped. "I meant to say this before, my bedroom doors always unlocked if you need me."

Kate looked to Bruce then back to me. "While I prefer a bit more privacy, you can always knock, or call if I'm asleep. My ringtone never fails to wake."

I nodded. "Goodnight."

"Night." The two said in unison as the door shut.

I lay down on my bed. Jason seemed to be warming up to me, which was nice. Steph and her friend, Cass, seem sweet, and I really like Kate. She seems like someone I could talk to, about anything. As I ran through the day in my head, I couldn't help but smile as I drifted off to sleep.

[abthepoet]

So Id like to mention that COVID19 has put a lot of things into perspective.

My industry of experiential marketing was literally one of the first to go about a week ago when stores began banning all live demonstrations. I work in the natural and organic food industry doing live events and cooking recipes on site to sample brands to customers at grocery retailers.And because sampling tables are good places to spread germs, my demos all immediately came to a stop. I'm also an in home, private Music Teacher to kids of various ages and needless to say if schools' on hold, so is teaching. and so is income. My Venmo is :ABBlas22

Which sucks, a lot because the majority of my work is independent contractor based. . . .and there's no health care, paid leave, unemployment, or sick time. Why do I still do it? Because I love the industry, the opportunities it affords me, and the pay is solid. Except come tax season. The Government likes to fuck you if you work for yourself. . . .even tho I pay for all my own equipment and car repairs to get me from job to job. My Venmo is ABBlas22

However, amid the panic, I havent felt this calm in years. The constant anxiety and pressure of having to make money and go to work and be on time and make my schedule and drive from this city to that city for this demo and that demo, has subsided. I finally wake up and I'm not staring at the clock counting down how long before I have to leave which triggers an anxiety fest about leaving my dogs home alone because my one dog has such severe separation anxiety she destroys her crate, escapes, and then ruins the house(we are actively working on it) . . .so I'm up early and nervous about, "ok I have three hours I have to walk the dogs for at least one of those hours, feed them, get dressed, brush teeth, try to eat, clean the house, stuff their Kongs, make sure I have everything I need, and then try to sneak out before the dog starts freaking out." followed by "did I book enough demos this week, if I have to execute 16 for the month where can I put another demo, should I give myself a day off? nah, i need the money, let me check my Google calendar for the 65th time this morning and stare at all the blank dates I should be booking demos instead of doing anything else because no matter how much I work, it is never enough. So I spend an hour worrying about plunging my family into financial ruin. . . . better get online and start digging thru emails and brand Ambassador groups to make sure I've got enough work. Oh what's that? the sound of my entire family and partner telling me to get a *regular* job even though the idea of punching a clock and working for someone else makes me physically sick. . but I go and do it anyway because its a W2 position so you think well maybe I'll get health benefits at least and then come to find out that this bullshit retail job doesn't give part timers benefits of any kind, but I keep the job anyway because everyone said a normal job was best, but it pays $6 less an hour than my demo gigs and is a total waste of my skills and professional experience and eventually is cutting into my income because its taking up so many weekly hours but pays significantly less that I start calling out to go do demos instead and then the same people who were like "get a regular job" turn around and go "no, not That job, try This job."

and I'm over here ready to fucking scream because I've Been very clear about wanting to be in business for myself. I have tried many things, including testing an extremely beta version of what eventually became Uber Eats. . . I could be a millionaire but my parents thought it was a stupid idea and once I used up my resources trying to drum up business, that was it.

also, this is the worst part about being a millennial. I went to college for music because they said be anything and follow your dreams . . .but then I graduated into recession (2006) and got the first job I could,at a deli, which . . . .isn't exactly a degree holding position. For years we said,"I'm just grateful I Have a Job right now." and we got bitter, broke, and depressed as a generation. We're in our 30's now and it's just as bleak an outlook for our generational future. At least until the boomers die out and free up some of that wealth, if they don't all leave it to the cat and state first just to spite us.

So yea, people are freaked out with COVID19 but for the first time, I dont feel pressure or anxiety to rush out the house or make money because everything got cancelled. All I want to do is work super hard on my own online store via Shopify and grow from there. I love to work and I love the discipline of hard work. I would rather spend 18 hours in a day working on my own business and hustling my ass off to make it work using over a decade of marketing and sales experience to promote my brand for once.

But that's hard to invest time and money when I live paycheck to paycheck and have a partner and fur babies who depend on me. Everytime I excitedly talk about dropshipping through shopify and all my plans for it, it's met with a nervous "I believe in you but dont fuck us financially." "I believe in you but doesn't that take time." "I believe in you but why don't you just work here, they pay decent."

I love that the #Coronavirus hit and suddenly human rights are easy to hand out. I love that Coronavirus got us to halt economies on a scale so massive that will actually help us fight climate change. Capitalism has destroyed our planet and our species.

I want to always remind everyone that we are a species first. Not countrymen, not race, not religion. . . we are all dancing flesh bags, given different corporeal conduits with which to experience life and then later compare notes with one another.

"What's life like in that short skin suit?"

"Not bad but I can't reach anything."

"Good thing I got one of these tall skin suits." *grabs top shelf items*

"Thanks!"

It's to help us come together, understand similarities thru differences and use them to gain new perspectives while helping our species and our planet thrive.

This insane notion that everyone needs to have a job needs to go. Our species was Not made to do slave labor all day long for an invented wage that keeps us stuck fighting for basic survival when we have the potential to completely alter our lives.

The Earth is a hostage who's not allowed to feed her own kids. They locked up every fruit bearing tree, enslaved every animal, poisoned the soil, polluted the water and then held your life at gunpoint and demand you hand over hours of your life to work that does a disservice to your potential for greatness just for a chance to get a taste of what should be your birthright.

Basic needs of survival that all humans will die without shouldn't be prizes for who can work themselves to death the fastest.

Im using this time as an opportunity and am taking what little resources I have to work on my online store and sell off and flip what I can to make start up money on Ebay. (I dont even have WiFi and my apartment complex has locked the business center for CoronaVirus) . Using my phone for everything is really fucking tedious, especially because I've had it for 4 years and it doesn't always cooperate, but I'm grateful I even have one to use. If you want to invest in me, even just $5 I will 100% be using it to get a business off the ground. I've got most of the basic work done and market research, but with no income I cant even afford the basic Shopify plan at $30 a month, I'm hoping they pass a moratorium on evictions because how do I pay rent with no job to go to!?

My Venmo is : ABBlas22 and I do reward!

[dolphin-enthusiast]

Im fucking SICK at home and I feel like absolute garbage, can I have hc's of the Bucci gang taking care of their sick s/o?

Oof anon big mood I was afraid I caught a cold like days ago jsbdbsa i t s t h e s e a s o n

Bruno:

- He's immediately concerned and takes days off to care for you. His inner mom would jump out more than ever right now.

- He's going to be cooking for you and literally making you drink lots of tea along with your medicine. You can count on him when it comes to your chores too.

- You'd have to literally yeet him away from overworking himself. You appreciate that he cares so much for you but you don't want him to overwork himself either. Poor man wouldn't even sleep at night if your sickness would be severe.

- Everytime you tell him that he's going to catch a cold too since he's spending so much time around you, he's just gonna brush you off. He doesn't get sick that often and besides he doesn't care. It's you we're talking about.

Giorno:

- Just like Bruno he's going to take some days off to spend time with you. He isn't that much of a mom but he's still worried.

- He'd make you tea and even read to you to help you relax. He knows just how rough colds can be, especially when the cough™️ kicks in.

- He'd stroke your hair while spooning you in an attempt to help you sleep. He'd often tell you that rest is important especially when you're sick.

- Eventually he'd have to get back to work but he'd put his teammates to check up on you often. In the evenings he'd come and apologize that he wasn't there all day with you, but you'd soothe him because you know how much he truly cares.

Abbacchio:

- At first isn't THAT worried about you. Everyone gets sick from time to time, we're not robots. But he would start to get concerned as your condition would worsen.

- He'd actually try to spend more time with you and keep an eye on you. He doesn't want you dying on him or something. He can be hella paranoid.

- Even if it's just a simple cold he can get VERY anxious since he always assumes the worst. And he already lost people close to him so he's afraid everyone that he cares about will be gone one day.

- But insecurities aside, he can get quite soft and caring in times like these. He's going to be constantly looking out for you and doing things for you. He's only going to loosen up when you would finally feel better.

Mista:

- At first he lowkey panics. Shit, he's not a medic, what is he supposed to do now? He doesn't want your condition to worsen so he'd immediately suggest that you see a doctor.

- During the entire time he's going to be even more clingy. All because he cares so much about you. He'd always try to cheer you up and suggest that you two watch your favorite shows, anything to get your minds off things.

- He'd provide you with plenty of cuddles too. He's hella affectionate in general, but right now he wants to comfort you and make you feel better. He'd spoon you or let you lie down with your head on his chest as he'd rub your back.

- He would try cooking for you but royally fail. Literally don't let this man near a fucking stove he's going to end up accidentally killing himself. You appreciate his efforts anyway and kiss his cheek in gratitude.

Fugo:

- He wouldn't really show it at first but he'd be worried for you. But his composure would shatter as he'd see just how sick you are.

- He would be more softer than usual and try to help you with as many things as possible. Any chores you had to do? He already did them for you. Food? He's gonna try his best to cook for you.

- He has a good memory so he would always remind you to take your medicine. He would bring it over to you anyway.

- Just like in Bruno's case, you'd have to tell him to take it easy. Sure you are sick and feeling like your throat is gonna exit the chat soon but you're not dying. He'd probably be so tired that he'd fall asleep at some point with his head on your chest. You'd just stroke his hair as he'd sigh contently.

Narancia:

- Highkey worried. You're sick and he doesn't know what to do to take your pain away oh boi. Calm the boi down because he tends to worry ALOT.

- He'd most likely go around asking the gang for help. As always Bruno's mom friend advice would turn out to be the best.

- After some talking with the mom of the group he's going to come back prepared. Always reminds you to take your medicine and cuddles you 25/8.

- He's like your emotional support human. You feel down because of your cold? Not anymore, he's here hugging you and telling you that it will go away soon. He's a big fan of chilling with you on the couch all wrapped up in the blankets too.

Bonus - Trish:

- She tries not to freak out too much but ultimately fails. You're the most important person in her life, of course that she's worried!

- She's very good at comforting people so her hugs would always soothe you and take your mind off things.

- She has mild experience with cooking so her cute attempts at putting together little meals for you would always cheer you up.

- She'd always be here for you and providing you with moral support. She knows how tough sickness can be and tries to make you feel better no what.

[theonlysoph]

BTS Reaction to their kid thinking they hit you

Request: Can I request a bts reaction to them hitting you playfully but their kid sees that and think that they hurt you seriously so they defend you? I think this is pure and innocent, I hope you do it 🖤

Note: Hey remember when I wanted to make this a writing blog but I forgot that im in university :) yea same,,, anyways send some requests pleaseee

Request        Masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~

Seokjin

Jin has just come back from promoting overseas, and although you did miss him you were happy for another reason. Your and Jin’s guilty pleasure was watching comedy shows, but the only time the two of you could watch was when your son was asleep.

For an hour you and Jin switched between putting dinner away and cleaning, and putting your son to sleep. It was about time for you guys to switch again when Jin came out of the bedroom with a huge smile. “I did it! Turn on Netflix!”

Whether you were both really tired, or the comedian was that funny, you and Jin were cry laughing right away. And each time Jin would start slapping your leg.

“You said to never hit girls cuz they’re delicate flowers!” Your son said from the doorway.

“You’re supposed to be asleep!” Jin whined as he got up again to lay the boy down.

Yoongi 

As much as you and Yoongi loved your daughter it was hard not having any time for yourselves. What made it worse is your daughter was attached to your hip. No that you could blame her, Yoongi was always on some tour or promotion, but even when he was here your daughter hardly left your side.

You and your daughter were baking cookies when Yoongi came home. He kissed the small girl hello,then turned to you to peck your cheek and lightly hit your ass. You both were too busy talking and catching up on your day to notice the upset look on your daughter’s face, at least until she hit Yoongi’s arm.

“What did I do?” Yoongi looked at him confused, but this only seemed to irritate your daughter more so she hit him again, causing you to laugh. “Y/nnnn, what do I do?” Yoongi whined, trying to fend off his own child.

Hobi

You and Hoseok got the opportunity to perform at the upcoming Bithit showcase, which you were both excited for. But being the over achieving couple that you both are, you guys (mainly Hobi) decided to pack it full of tricks and super complex moves.

Your son was running around while you and Hoseok practiced. You didn’t know what happened, but as you were performing one of your tricks Hobi accidently hit you and you missed your landing, causing you to fall to the ground. Luckily you were fine though.

But from what your son saw it looked superbad. He came running to you and fell on top of you. “It’s ok mommy!” Then sending a death glare to your husband he said “Leave her alone daddy!”

You laughed squeezing your small son. “Thank you baby. But we just messed up the dance, daddy didn’t hurt me.”

“And daddy never would!!” Hobi added for good measure.

Namjoon 

For once Namjoon was home so you had him spend time with your son while you did errands. When you came home Namjoon was in the kitchen cooking. You wanted to be really sweet and surprise Namjoon with a hug. But that didn’t work, instead he ended up accidently hitting you.

Your son ran head first into Namjoon’s long legs, keeping him from moving any closer to you. Once Namjoon saw you were ok he turned his attention to the small boy. But he was confused as to why his son was trying to push him away.

“Hey hey what’s wrong?” Namjoon asked the small boy.

“You were mean to mommy so I had to protect her,” your son answered. You couldn’t help but smile at your little knight in shining armor and kissed his cheek. “I’m ok, daddy’s just very clumsy.” To which Namjoon could only shoot you a small glare.

Jimin

You and Jimin had met through dancing so occasionally he would take on a project and ask for your help. Which is why your little family had spent the last few hours in Bighit’s practice room. The concept for your dance was a broken relationship so Jimin had to take on an abusive role.

“Mamaaaaaaa,” your baby whines and toddled to you, sinking her face in your lap.

You picked her up, already seeing tears fall from her face. “What’s wrong my love?” But your daughter couldn’t make any coherent sentences. So you continued rubbing her back. “Did daddy scare you,” she nodded.

Hearing that, Jimin came close and stroked the small girl’s hair. “We were dancing, little one. Daddy would never ever hit you or mommy.” That was all it took for your daughter to turn and ask to be in Jimin’s arms instead. The girl could never stay mad at her dad.

Taehyung

Finally Taehyung had a whole weekend off from his idol responsibilities, you don’t know how he managed to convince them but you were beyond excited to have him home and spend time with your little family. Your son had woken up with so much excitement and refused to leave your husband alone all day. From eating, to playing, to nap time your son only asked for Taehyung. At least until he caught you and Taehyung play fighting.

“Daddy nooooo!” Your son shrieks running towards you both, tears already forming. He went straight to Taehyung holding both of his hands in his smaller ones.

Taehyung looked at him confused. “What’s wrong little one?”

“Don’t hit mommy! She’s a princess and you don’t hit princesses!”

“Thank you my prince! You saved me from the horrible monster.” You took your son in your lap and smothered him in kisses, while Taehyung jealousy looked on.

Jungkook 

You had been bothering Jungkook all day. It was all in good fun but after a while he was starting to feel like he was fathering two children. Everytime he cleaned an area you purposefully miss placed something, everytime he sat for longer than a few minutes you would run up and cover him in kisses or playfully hit him.

“Aish Y/N!” Jungkook laughs at your silliness and pretends to hit you away. You flinch as a reflex but your daughter comes screaming and running to your side.

“No daddy!” She cries with tears in her eyes. Jungkook’s joking demeanor changed to one of shock. Normally your daughter adored him, he could do no wrong in her eyes, but here she was crying because of him.

You take your daughter in your arms to calm her down, trying your hardest not to laugh. “It’s ok baby. Mommy and daddy were just playing.”

[warmau]

meet midnight!au x bts

aus about falling in love at midnight,,,dont know where it came from but this blog is basically a wasteland anyway might as well have fun w it! 

namjoon

there’s never much to do past midnight in your apartment,,,,,to be honest you hate being awake at this hour

but you’re kind of a night owl

getting things done when it’s dark outside is sort of your thing and sitting at your desk with the light on

brooding over work you should have done a week ago

you’re upset that the window in your bedroom leads out to the next building

so you can’t even see much of the street or even the sky

you literally would have to climb out onto your fire escape to look up

and usually,,,,you wouldn’t entertain the idea of going out onto that old, rusty looking thing

but tonight you’re extra bored 

so you do

the night air is a little cold - you regret not wearing more layers but climbing through the window was already hard enough

the fire escape makes some sounds as you settle down and get comfortable

and you’re half worried it’s going to give way and drop you three stories down

but it doesnt and you look up to the sky,,,,,,,where small specks of what could be dust or actual stars glitter

you hear another noise and look back down to see that,,,,,,,there’s someone climbing out of the window on the other house

the one thats right beside yours

a tall, slim looking silhouette makes it out and does exactly what you did

pushing his feet through the bars and sitting down to look up at the sky

you might be,,,,at most,,,,,six feet away from his fire escape and you wonder if he’s just as bored as you

“looking at the sky?”

you call out and he hears you, dropping his gaze from above

he shyly itches at the back of his neck when he realizes he’s got company

“sorta. i cant see it from my window so i have to come out here.”

“can’t sleep?”

he shrugs

“im trying to finish some work up,,,,,,im not a morning person.”

you chuckle,,,,,looks like you arent the only on in this city with a sleeping on time problem

it’s quiet for a moment but then you see that the boy across you has begun playing with a lighter

the small flame flicks for only a second before he lets it go

and when you see it spark up the little halo of light it produces shows off some of the features of the boy sitting across from you

he’s got a sharp jawline 

that goes up into high cheekbones 

his eyes are dark and whenever the flame lights up you can nearly see the line of orange fire within them

it’s getting colder by the minute,,,,but you’re entranced

“so what kind of work do you do?”

he puts the lighter down

“i write songs,,,,,,lyrics mostly.”

“id love to hear some.”

he tilts his head up and throws his hand over his back “i can go get my book if you want.”

“id love that’

you sit there,,,for god knows how long listening to him read from across the fire escape

and it’s only when it gets too cold to handle and that you realize it must be nearing some ungodly time do you part ways

and when you wake up the next morning,,,,you go out - tired onto your fire escape and are surprised to see what looks like a paper plane settled on the fire escape

you pick it up and unfold it

‘i didn’t get your name, but mine is namjoon. hope we can see each other again,,,,,,,maybe tonight?’ 

you smile and when midnight comes around again you open your window and see namjoon on the other fire escape

he’s playing with his lighter again and you think this time you’ll bring a blanket out so you won’t get cold

(and maybe ,,,, you know,,,, so you can spend some more time with him)

seokjin

you’ve been roommates with seokjin for at least two years now

you like his company a lot and unlike other roommates that you have,,,,he actually cleans up and cooks

and if anything,,,,all your friends who have met him also adore him (a little too much you might even add)

the only person who seokjin doesn’t get along with is your boyfriend

who rubbed him the wrong way from the moment they met

and everytime you go out and tell seokjin it’s with him, seokjin makes a bit of a face 

and says “if he does anything - you tell me right away.”

you used to roll your eyes, tell seokjin that your boyfriend isn’t all that bad 

that seokjin was being overprotective for no reason at all 

but then,,,,you found out your boyfriend was planning on breaking up with you - just after your anniversary 

you’d had a big fight about it,,,your boyfriend had tried to lie but you had evidence that he had been planning it

and when all was said and done,,,,,your boyfriend,,,well ex now,,,,had said something that was so painful

that no matter how much you told yourself NOT to cry on the bus ride back home

when you got off at the stop,,,,the sky was pitch black and no one was out so you let yourself just ball your eyes out

the only problem was,,,whenyou opened the door to your apartment seokjin was still up

you’d expected he’d be in bed,,,he had work down at his restaurant tomorrow 

but he was sitting on the couch - some shitty drama re-running on tv

and when he saw you,,,,,,,

the bowl of popcorn fell from his lap as he got up, coming toward you so fast you nearly blinked and he was already holding you in his arms

your face snug in the front of his shirt - soaking it through with your tears

his hand settled on the small of your back

he spoke against the shell of your ear

“what did he do? do i have to kill him?”

you brought your hands around him, bunching up the back of his shirt in your fists as you just cried

seokjin didn’t let you go, not even when you started sliding down toward the floor - weak from crying

he simply picked you up in his arms and let you cuddle close against him when he put you down on your bed

“don’t go” you whispered and he nodded

racking his fingers through your hair and whispering softly till there were no more tears left inside of you to cry

when he felt that you’d stopped shaking, seokjin let you go gently

he let your head rest on the pillow and he brought the blankets up to cover you

and although you hadn’t fallen asleep yet,,,,seokjin must have assumed you had

because cautiously you felt him kiss the middle of your forehead

whisper against it that no one deserved someone like you,,,,,,,he himself didnt

even if he had wanted you so bad for so long 

when he’d gotten up to shuffle out of the room , you’d opened your eyes

touching the skin of your forehead still warm from his lips

and after only a moment to think it over

you got out of bed, making your way into the living room were seokjin was cleaning up after himself

and he turned- shocked and about to ask if everything was alright 

when you pressed up close to him, taking his face in your hands and going

“seokjin,,,,,,,,it’s me who doesn’t deserve you.”

the words fall from your lips and before anything else seokjin kisses them 

kisses you and kisses you murmuring in between that he’d do anything for you to know,,,,how much he loves you,,,,,,,and how much he’s wanted this 

yoongi

you hate working the graveyard shift at the local diner 

half because you never know what weirdo is going to walk through the door,,,,,and the other half because it gets so empty and boring

and the kitchen staff don’t bother making conversation with you anyway

so you’re stuck,,,,,waiting till someone comes by

and it’s a particularly rainy night on this shift

you watch the rain accumulate on the window near one of the booths and sigh

praying silently that the rain will stop by the time you have to leave 

you almost jolt when the little bell chimes and in walks a lonely looking boy

his head is hidden by a hood much too large for him and in his left hand is a notebook and a couple of wads of cash

“just one?”

you ask cautiously,,,,worried about this persons intentions

until he looks up and you’re thankful that he looks about your age and tired more than menecing

he nods

and when you seat him beside a booth he takes one glance at the menu and then orders coffee, black and asks for an extra pen if you have one

you give him the pen you keep in your aprons pocket and then go back to get the coffee

it’s nearing midnight now,,,,so you’re not sure why he’d want to drink coffee

but either way you slide the mug down on the table and notice that he’s pulled out his notebook

turning past pages and pages of what looks like stanzas of poetry

the boy takes a sip of his coffee and lays out his money flat on the table

and then,,,,he starts to write

for a while you try to ignore him but he’s the only interesting person,,,,,well he’s the only person at all that’s in the diner

and before you can help yourself you’re sliding into the booth across from him and asking if it’s ok if you sit here

he looks up at you for a moment - but nods

only a minute has to pass before he goes “are you going to ask me what im writing about?”

you shift, your uniform suddenly feels a little too tight for comfort

“wow,,,,can you read my mind?” you chuckle and he shrugs “there’s nothing else to ask a stranger is there?”

you blink, but nod slowly

“im writing poetry,,,,,,im not very good at it.”

he taps his pen against the page and then flicks his eyes up to meet yours

“do you write?”

you shake your head,,,,the sound of the rain on the window matches the speed of his tapping

“why not?”

“why not what?”

“why don’t you write?”

you laugh in response and it makes the boy raise an eyebrow

“i dont have the talent.”

he grins at this, the first real sign of emotion on his face

“me either, but here i am.”

you two talk a little more about poetry,,,,he introduces himself as yoongi and you think that’s quite a unique name. you tell him it’ll make a good poets name 

yoongi finds that funny as well

around an hour in some more customers come in,,,mostly security guards or construction workers who work odd hours

you get a little busy with them

but then it dies down and you find yourself with yoongi again

he checks his watch and frowns 

“ive got to get going, i have a pretty early class. but here, i wrote this for you.”

he tears a page from his notebook and hands it to you. he motions to the money on the table

it’s far too much for a cup of coffee but yoongi tells you to keep the change as a tip

he liked talking to you

when he leaves you look down at the page,,,,,it’s a simple poem

and when you read it ,,,, you realize that it’s a poem about you

about you in this diner ,,,,, and you look back out the window

the rain has stopped but its still pretty dark out

you can make yoongi’s figure out crossing the street and for some reason you wave at it

you’re shocked when the figure of his stops and he waves back

,,,,,,,,,,,yoongi comes back the next night and suddenly you think the graveyard shift isn’t too bad

hoseok

there’s a lot of people cramped into the small space where the show is being held

usually you like a crowd,,,,but this is a lot

and to be fair you were dragged here by a friend - not because you really even know or like the band at all

but your friend is head over heels for the lead singer

and so you’re there to be moral support

at least you were ,,,,,,,,,,, until you see him

he’s grinning when he gets on stage

he slaps the back of the bass player and chugs a part of a beer that someone in the crowd hands him

he’s all smiles and cheers and you’re almost shocked that he isn’t the lead singer

he’s the drummer

he pulls back his bangs from his eyes with one hand, the other holds his sticks as he gets comfortable behind the drums

his body is lean, but muscular and the tank he’s wearing is slit at the arms so with one turn you can see his chest and toned arms

you lean over to your friend and ask “whose that?”

she jumps up and down, eyes directed only at the singer at the mic 

“whose who?”

“the drummer?”

“oh! jung hoseok,,,,,he’s like a wild party boy or something.”

she talks fast, distracted by the other man in front of her but you just keep looking at the person behind him

the person behind the drums

and for a moment hoseok locks eyes with you

his are brown,,,,but they’re special - they’re lit up like those of a lion

you’ve never been so electrified by someones gaze

and then he shoots you a half smile, his teeth glittering in the harsh light on the stage

the set starts and the music is loud and frenzied,,,,very punk with undertones of romantic pop

it makes no sense but you feel it ,,,,,, but most of all you feel hoseok

because you’re close to the stage, so close that you’re sure he’s burrowing holes into you with his eyes 

you might not admit it,,,but you make a little show for him

pretending to sing along, running your hands through your hair, you’re focused on keeping that attention

and it works 

when the set ends and the next band goes up on stage 

hoseok, sweaty and panting gets up from the drums - locks eyes with you a tilts his head to signal that you meet him outside

you tell your friend you’ll be back,,,,,but that’s a hard maybe

because as soon as you’re outside

in the dark, cold night 

hoseok is there - leaning against the back wall in the alley outside of the venue 

and you don’t even have to think twice

when he beckons you over 

and smiles in the dark, putting a hand in your hair and combing it through 

“is this your first show?”

“not at all” 

his grin gets wider, “yeah, i could tell.”

he looks even better up close,,,,it takes time but your eyes adjust and you see how pretty his skin is - still covered a little in sweat, sleek and glowing

“so, did you like it? the music, i mean. i know you liked me.”

hoseok flirts and you give a little, cute shrug of your shoulders

“wasn’t paying attention too much to the music,,,,my mind was somewhere else.”

hoseok makes a low sound of surprise,,,,,,but lets his hand tilt your chin up

“it’s ok, we’re not in everyones taste. but im glad im in yours.”

“we’ll see about that.”

there’s only a moment before you two are kissing, rough and raw and then you pull back to get a good look at him again

you notice he has a tattoo that dips down his ribs and another that hides over the hem of his belt

you put your hand there

“can i see?”

he chuckles “getting right to the point are we? i guess ill let you have a look but,,,,,,not in this shitty back alley.”

with that hoseok throws an arm around you, he pulls you flush against his side and you lean up to kiss right below his jaw

you guys saunter off into the night,,,,,but you make sure to text your friend an apology later on hehe

jimin

you like going to the movies alone 

which in some cases freaks people out because movies are supposed to be a social event

but you’re like no. if im paying twenty bucks for a ticket im going alone so i can focus on the movie,,,,,not having a conversation with a friend or making out with someone

the only problem is,,,,it’s pretty hard to see a movie alone

the theater is usually packed

and so your only options are either going super early in the morning or super late at night

and since the morning one is hard,,,,,,afterall you do have things to do other than that

you always pick the super late night screening if you can

and usually there’s maybe a max of five people there - which is a nice comfortable number for you

but tonight there’s only one other person

which you’re even better with

the only thing is,,,,,this person must be a lot like you

because he’s sitting in your favorite row - the best row in your opinion for watching the movie

and like you,,,,he’s even brought his own hidden snacks in the waistband of his sweats

you take a seat,,,,four or five chairs away from him

he doesn’t turn to look at you and maybe you’re happy that you and this one other movie-goer have silently agreed not to bother one and other

but,,,,,something about him is just so,,,,,,,curious

for one,,,,he’s wearing a mask inside,,,,,where there’s only one other person

he even has a cap on too

maybe he has cold? you think to yourself

but whatever it is,,,,you can’t believe it,,,,,,that this one person is distracting you 

you try hard to look at the screen - hope the movies plot will save you

but it turns out that it’s just another crappy indie romance film and you’re like ,,,,,,,,, not at all impressed

the person doesn’t seem to be either, he suddenly turns to you and shrugs

he says something but because of the mask you cant hear him so you motion for him to take it off

he hesitates, but does it and goes

“it’s kind of boring, huh?”

you nod but you’re trying to make sure if you’re seeing right

because the person in front of you is,,,,,,,,park jimin

park jimin of bangtan

his face is on a poster for LG right outside the movie theater

you try not to act too shocked, you just go “this director is kind of known for this boring romantic stuff.”

he looks a little surprised and suddenly is moving his seat to be closer to you

“i dont see a lot of movies,,,,,my job gets in the way of that. do you have any recommendations?”

you try to calm your heart - you’ve never been this close to someone this famous before

and you dont want to come off as a wild fan or anything so you’re trying to carry on a totally normal conversation

giving him a list of recent ones that you liked and explaining that this time is the best - there’s usually maybe only a couple of people here so there’s no background noise or whatever

jimin nods and sits back against the chair 

he looks up and the scene in the movie is that of the main pair kissing

he sighs and you still cant believe that it’s him,,,,,it’s really him

“this is going to sound crazy but i havent kissed someone in years”

he suddenly breathes and you blink

“o-oh, why not?”

“my job sort of ,,,,, doesn’t like it if i date.”

“ah,,,” you pretend to know what that feels like,,,,,you’re just single of your own free choice

it must be hard for him 

suddenly jimin turns to you and even in the dark movie theater you can tell he’s flustered 

“was that awkward of me to say, im sorry-”

“no no it’s fine. im sorry your job seems so strict”

he sighs again, taking his cap off and running his hands through his hair

“it’s a job i love, so it’s ok.”

his voice trails off and the scene on the screen just gets more romantic to the point where even you look down

until you hear jimin’s voice, quiet and low

“i forgot what that all feels like,,,,,,,” 

you turn to him and jimin meets your gaze

for a moment he just maps your face out with his eyes and then swallows a bit

“are you currently dating someone?”

you shake your head, your palms are sweating from the way jimin is looking at you

and suddenly you can tell what he’s going to ask next

so without a complaint you nod “yes, you can kiss me.”

he smiles, leaning in and for a second you don’t care that this is THE park jimin of bangtan

because you’ve missed kissing too,,,,,even if it’s hard to admit that

and before you know it your hand is in his hair and you’ve moved your seat into that of his lap

and you’re thankful for your trips this late at night to the movies

because you’re kissing jimin even as the credits behind you roll 

taehyung [tw: drinking]

working out is always a bummer for you

especially working out in font of people - like it might just be in your head but it feels like people stare

so you opt for running beside the river at night

its dangerous,,,,,maybe,,,,,but it’s more comfortable for you and usually you get lost in your music anyway

you’re almost halfway done with your run when you notice there’s someone by the river 

he’s dancing around, spinning in circles with some sort of music of his own blasting from his phone in his back pocket

you think that you’d better avoid this guy,,,,,,he looks like he’s trouble 

but when you want to start running the other way you notice him stumble, almost right into the rail separating him from the river

you skid to a stop, the moral part of you nagging that you better go see if he’s alright

as you come closer you see that it’s not some old weird man like you’d dreaded - but instead a boy who looks like he’s in his early twenties

he’s dressed rather nice, pretty earrings swinging from his ears everytime he twirls every which way

and when he catches your gaze he breaks out into an even bigger smile

“well hellllllooooo, do you want to dance?”

he outstretches his hand and you just look at it

“are you ok? i saw you almost trip over the rail-”

“i am not ok, i am taehyung and i am fantastic ,,,,,,,,,,,and you are rather lovely actually”

he stops dancing and comes closer to look at you 

you look at him, smelling the scent of a bit of alcohol off him

“are you drunk?”

“tipsy, i can think straight don’t worry” 

he giggles and does another turn, offering his hand once again

“so, dance?”

you shake your head pointing over your shoulder “actually, i better finish my run”

“dancing is MUCH better exercise. especially if two beautiful people dance together.”

he grins and starts to sway again

you feel awkward now,,,,telling yourself off for sticking your nose into something

but then taehyung takes your hand while you’re in thought and twirls you around, dipping you by the waist before you can even catch your breath

“well, you know my name, tell me yours”

you fret a bit, stuttering it out

“pretty name, pretty face  - do you really not want to dance a little with me?”

he lets you go and waits for an answer

you know you should just say no and go on with your run

but something about this taehyung is enchanting,,,,like his eyes are sparkling with something magic

you sigh, “im not good at it - be warned”

he claps and takes your hands in his “ill teach you”

you let taehyung spin you around, lead you and then he pulls you close as his hands are in yours and the song on his phone turns slow

“do you like to waltz?”

“i,,,i dont dance i said that-”

he lowers his lips closer to your ear

“it’s a shame, pretty people should love dancing. it makes them even prettier.”

you feel your heart jump into your throat and then taehyung is letting you go to point up

“look at the moon” 

you look up and taehyung sighs “she’s shining down just for us.”

you want to say that that’s a bit romantic of a thing to say to a stranger,,,,but when you catch taehyung’s beautiful profile against the moonlight shimmer

you keep the thought to yourself

and taehyung and you dance a little more into the night

jungkook

to say it’s been a hard week is an understatement 

it’s been damn near hellish 

everything seems to be going wrong and you don’t know how to control it anymore

so you’ve been doing the only thing that comforts you just a little bit,,,,,,eating your favorite takeout

actually,,,,you’ve eaten it seven days in a row

and each time you order it at like midnight and the same delivery boy shows up

his dark hair sticking out of his helmet, his big eyes wide whenever you open the door and sluggishly hand him the money

on the eighth day of ordering the same thing at the same late time 

the delivery boy drops the bag in your hands but asks

“are you ok?”

you sigh, leaning against your door and shaking your head

“no,,,,,,but whats the point of telling a stranger”

he shrugs “getting things off your chest can really help.”

you look at him, reading for the first time in a week what his nameplate says

“well jungkook,,,,,it’s been really shitty”

you sigh and he unclips his helmet, taking it off and shaking his hair 

when he looks at you again you have to say,,,,the helmet does him no justice

without it he’s like ten thousand times cuter

and you feel ten thousand times more embarrassed about complaining to the damn delivery boy about how bad life is

but he doesn’t seem phased at all, he just leans on the wall across from your door and crosses his arms

“life is always though, but there’s nothing to do but stay positive.”

you know he’s right but you shrug at it “i dont think theres much to be positive about,,,,,,,,,except food”

you lift the bag with a grin “this always makes me happy”

jungkook laughs and uncrosses his arms 

“well then im happy to deliver it to you forever if it makes you happy.”

you flush a little at that, looking down at your feet wishing you werent wearing your old pj’s in front of him all of a sudden

he must have seen you at your utter worst this week

but he’s still there beaming at you, the watch on his hand ticking past midnight 

“i dont want to take anymore of your time,,,,” you start but jungkook shrugs

“it’s fine, this place is a five minute bike away from the resturant”

your eyes widen “you ride a bike,,,,,not like a motorcycle or something?”

jungkook laughs into his palm “i wish! unfortunately i only have a bike,,,,,,,”

he thinks for a second

“do you want to take a late night ride? my boss hasnt called me about any other orders?”

you put the bag of food inside your apartment and grab your keys from the wall

“id love that”

you find yourself on the handlebars of jungkook’s bike,,,,which he’s had since he was like fifteen by the way

the night air whips past your face as jungkook pedals you around the neighborhood and you feel alive for the first time in a while

jungkooks warm hands over yours on the handlebars 

when he gets you home, you hop of and thank him - red in the face from the wind and from screaming of fear when jungkooks bike almost tipped

he grins, telling you it’s nothing

and that the only payment he needs from you is for the food (obviously) and maybe a kiss on the cheek as a tip 

[sophocused]

pursuits of 2019 | a 3am ramble

Hi hi don't mind me as I ramble about all the ideas I have floating about my head bc it's the new year and I'm really excited.

tbh actually I think 2019 is the year I wear my clothes that actually show the shape of my body, idk I think, I've been expressing myself well with the colourful clothes, I think a lot of friends associate colourfulness with me now, which is fucking bomb. I dont even remember the days I would wear all black, or all toned down shades. But yeah for 2019, I wanna wear more non-baggy clothing, colourful just the same... I'll probably treat myself to a lil shopping spree sometime late February or mid-March. Ooo or I'll go thrifting againnn sometime then.

As for school that's coming back, thanks to friends I think the textbooks they provided me saves me $250 of textbook money, and I also switched out one of the 2000 psyc courses for anth1210 which I've been told is super easy so I'm gna work hard to get an A+. I also got psyc 2490 which is a more intermediate elective bc ik essays are involved but I really fucking interested in abnormal psychology. Maybe I can learn something about myself. learn how to help others better. how to help myself better. It's an both electives are online courses so oof I need to FOCUS. Dont get sucked into procrastination temptations and also I need to be frequent in talking to and or meeting up with the profs. I just wanna be more involved for once. I wanna show that i care about the course and not just the number being served up to me on my transcript. Bc that's really important to me in order for me to stay trying and giving a fuck about school. I need to see value in what I'm learning. It's not just a way to my degree. It's not just some stepping stone. The content is worth something to me.

So for winter term, I'm probably going to finally learn how to study in public alone. I'll be able to find more spaces too bc I no longer need places with an outlet bc my parents got me a notebook for Christmas that lasts over 10 hours so FUCK YEA it's so light I'm so happy. My back is so happy holy shit. It's going to add LEAGUES of convenience in my day-to-day uni life tbh. Taking it out during class is easy it so smol and it boots up so fast SIGH i didnt even know I wanted one hahahah I didnt think to get myself something like that or save up for it so glad my parents did. But yeah more study spaces means more practice for me to be alone in public man. I still get anxious sometimes. I feel like I'm being watched. 1. I'm more than most likely not bc everyone's doing their own thing. 2. even if they were, their eyes are just wandering like my eyes do when I casually people watch. I gotta train my mind and body dat it's not a big deal.

Anyway, IM LIMITING MYSELF TO SKIPPING NO MORE THAN 3 TIMES per class. Like I swear to god, it's a 3 strikes I'm out typa thing. Maybe I'll put $10 in a thing for everytime I skip, and donate it to a charity or something. Which isn't very good punishment since I'd be doing a good thing aaaa Idk yet. BASTA. No skipping. Fuck. Skipping was the main fucking reason I did ASS in fall term. That and alternating between "I'll do it at school" and "I'll do it when I get home" too often.

Get your head in the fuckin game nina, I dont wanna see another C or B in that transcript. B+ is the bare minimum standard now. Gotta resurrect that GPA.

YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. My social life is gna suffer a lil. Hi friends who I normally hang out with or see all the time. You will likely only see me once a week 😅 bc ya girl gotta study for her dreams to come true. I wanna ace human phys 2. I wanna ace microbio. I wanna ace anthropology in humanities. I wanna ace abnormal psychology. I wanna get 7 hours of sleep a night at least. I wanna be ahead in my reading. I wanna be up to date with my class notes. I wanna keep all my files organized. All my due dates organized. I wanna be able to work 14 hours a week, 5 days a week, without feeling like it's in the way of my studies and life in general. I wanna be able to see friends at least sometimes, like a lunch date, bc lord knows I've learned that I cant study as much as when I'm alone compared to when I'm with other people.

I'm gonna cook more often at home too, or do something like that, I hadn't cooked since summer bc of how school got, and thanks to my fam for understanding, but I gotta do my part in the house. take initiative. keep laundry folded gdi. I dont like coming home to a room with a mountain of clothes to fold in a corner and a desk where I can barely see my desk. It just drains me. So knowing this, I'm reminding myself the way I like things, where I want things to go, and what I need to do to get them there.

uh ah uh okay something I realized has been extremely apparent for most of 2018. to put it bluntly, I dont see myself as someone other persons could romantically love. Not after christian tbh. before you think it's because I dont like myself, I love myself. I'm so fucking great at loving myself. The thing is, I worked really hard to love myself, and I'm a constant fluctuating work in progress. and thats not even romantically. so, it just feels like that's how it would be if any other person were to try and love me, that's a whole lot of time and effort, and they'd have to want to want to love me in the first place. THAT sounds like I a lotta work. I dont want to put that pressure on anyone??? I think I'm only making half any sense bc another part of me wants to probably say, "ofc there are people who will want to be with u, u acorn". SO I'm gna follow that little voice this year. Last year I shunned it and focused more on platonic love and woo yeah it's so strong, theres nothing stronger.

I'm gna find me a girl. or a mans. depends who I end up meeting first. I know if it's a girl it's tricky bc how do I know if she's into girls too without exposing that I'm trying to find out if she is for the sole purpose of wanting to flirt with her??? I only just recently embraced my attraction in 2018 so it's like... I got no practice in actually flirting with women. I barely have practice flirting with dudes. Anyway ANYWAY, I'm just letting the universe know that if they got someone in store for me in 2019, my arms and mind are open as hell. I'm gna love them so healthily and we gon have such a fulfilling and respectable dynamic. we're gna be so perfectly imperfect bc we gon understand that we're just people and cant be each other's sole source for all kinds of love and energy, that would otherwise be given by many different types or friends and family members even.

WOW I'm really sleepy hmm maybe I'm finally all rambled out.

[sequencesmile]

Story Time

so, i had this neighbor who became my friend. She's in her mid 30s. she has 3 children now. Btw I'm younger than her I'm only in my 20s. Her eldest child named cassy (she's now 11years old) was very closed to me because ever since she was a kid she's always staying in my house. I brought her with me every time i go malling. I bought her a lot of things as my reward for her since she helped me doing household chores. I also brought her to every restaurants she haven't gone to. If she's here in the house i cooked delicious food , she ate 4 times a day here. And sometimes we just called mcdo or jollibee for delivery. Her mom was pretty okay with it since she trusted me with everything. So here's the thing her husband is pretty much an asshole. Maricel (which is my neighbor) she knew everything about me and vice versa. Sometimes she called me on the phone crying about how she can't handle her husband's shitty attitude. She rants about him and ofcourse me, as a friend i am giving her advices but every advices were just shrugged away. i'm not the only person she's telling me about her personal problems, she's telling everyone MY GOD.

Her Husband is very addicted alcohol. He is literally drinking everyday and went home really drunk. According to maricel he left the house without giving anything to them. Like money to buy food/snack for his children. And the kids were running towards me complaining they're hungry and ofcourse me being soft i bought them food. AND JOBLESS! He had a job in a call center but only lasted for 3months and then he worked in his uncle's company but only lasted less than a month and lastly just this pandemic he worked in a hospital (idk his position but his wife told me that it's a computer thing related, like encoding something like that) But he lasted not less than a week i guess, ? or 2 weeks . And he always excuse that he's going to look for job but ended up going home drunk. He's physically hurting his children most especially his eldest saying bad words like " YOU'RE SO DUMB" His wife also told me that he doesn't like taking care of his children. At such a young age her eldest which is only eleven years old is the one responsible for her siblings. If something happened to her siblings she's the one to blamed for.He is a fucking horrible and irresponsible person and father. He doesn't even fit for that.

Maricel was working in a recruitment agency , the owner of the company is her aunt. Before she worked there, someone from our another neighbor told her if she's interested to work in a travel agency. But she declined the offer and chose the recruitment agency. She was already working 4months ahead of me. But sadly she's very unlucky with her company. Her company increased her salary just one time, no over time pay, she was yelled at, cussing at, and no benefits, no sick leave, no vacation leave, and no work no pay. Her salary is not even enough since she has 3 kids and she's the only one supporting all of them.

after 4 months, i was hired in a call center and i was just waiting for a call on when im going to begin. Maricel came up to me and told me the travel agency that was been offered to her before because they're still hiring. I told her that i am not interested because i was already hired. But she was insisting me to atleast try. In order for her to stop bugging me i did try. The next day I went to the travel agency she was bugging me about and i was totally very non-chalant about the application and i was very surprised that i was hired. When the General Manager said " Can you start tomorrow?" I literally stopped idk what to answer because i suddenly think about the call center. But then i answered "YES" that moment i was thinking the i have to wait for a call from the call center, while i have to begin right away in a travel. I guess I was meant to be in a travel agency aside from its related to my course my boss is now my "Adoptive Mother". (its another story time tho how did it happen)

Now, Maricel's husband named FUCKING ARGEL was extremely jealous of me, his wife told me that he kept saying " Why did you let her (which is me) offered that job if onlyyou had accepted it you already had a high salary! Maricel defended that she already was working in recruitment before she bugged me on applying in a travel agency). I bought some appliances with my very own money and that's my biggest achievements lol. When cassy got home from malling with me she would run to her parents excitedly and showed them the stuff i bought for them. If cassy's here in the house she'll be home around 8pm, before she goes back home I would let her eat dinner first. Every time his dad will ask her she said " i already eat my dinner , im full" .. and these shenanigans turned out upside down. Her dad won't let her come to my house anymore. And she told that he yelled at her and angrily said that why won't you stop saying her name! and he even wished me dead! and the kids told me that he even disrespect his mom and even cussed at too!Imagine that

Mommy Deb ( My boss/adoptive mom) allowed them to swim in their clubhouse, we thought everything was okay but guess what he's jealous of her too. Anyway now the kids aren't going here anymore, they do sleepovers and the usual things we do before. Their second child kellie and the youngest kurt, everytime they hear my voice they will run towards me and hugged me.

When the pandemic started I almost never getting out of the house. Since we were temporaily closed because no tourists allowed to enter our country yet. I have an online job. Maricel left her job and now she do our neighbor and her aaaunt's laundry as her sideline job every saturdays. And still ASSHOLE ARGEL doesn't have a job.

Just a few days back i was outside of their house together with the kids and maricel. This asshole argel called on Jillian's ( cassy's cousin, 10yrs old) messenger. He heard my voice and cussed. I didn't hear it since it wasn't on a speaker. It was just jillian who told me. I confronted maricel and i fucking hate her reaction. I said " YOUR HUSBAND CUSSED AT ME" and she was like " AH. HMM WELL HE'S REALLY LIKE THAT" i was pretty pissed off and then i confronted her again i said " YOU DIDN'T EVEN DEFEND ME?" she replied " WHAT DO U MEAN I DID NOT ? I DO! HE'S JUST LIKE THAT" I got so fucking furious and told her "IF YOU GUYS JUST TOLERATE HIM FOR BEING LIKE THAT, WELL NOT ME! I WILL NEVER EVER ALLOW ANYONE TO DISRESPECT ME LIKE THAT! TREAT ME SHIT WHEN ALL I DO WAS BEING KIND TO YOU, TO YOUR CHILDREN AND TO YOUR FAMILY! I DID NOT DO ANYTHING TO HIM!

now i decided to end our friendship. I explained a lot of things to the kids. I blocked maricel and argel on facebook and i unfriended cassy (since her parents can access her fb) I AM SO DONE WITH PEOPLE WHO DONT DESERVE MY KINDNESS!

[raindrop-rouge]

i was tagged by @raefill :D Thank you gorgeous ^3^

1. Which BTS song means the most to you?

I feeeeel like I’ve heard their songs before but can’t remember any

2. How do you feel about astrology?

I love it!!! Like talking to others about it is a quick way to get to know them because they will always comment on their own horoscope/sign... and well if they don’t that says enough about them too tbh. It can make both easy and lighthearted conversation, and be a brindge into deeper conversation, bless astrology tbh

3. Do you think ghosts exist?

I wish, and I like pretending they’re real, but deep down I can’t bring myself to :(

4. What’s your favorite instrument?

Well the piano is my favorite to listen to alone, and fun to play... BUT I HAVE THE BIGGEST SOFT SPOT FOR THE HARP OK, I took lessons for a year, it’s just so elegant and aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh

5. Who was the last person to make you really smile?

... this is gonna sound really sad, but my manager at work was trying to act out a deal all by himself to help me understand, and honestly bless this man and his family, he’s wonderful, and his efforts really made me laugh 

6. What do you do when you feel vulnerable?

:))))) I either lash out right there and then, to set things right (ie how I want them to be)... or, when it’s really bad... I just go quiet. 

7. What is the last dream you had?

OH MY GOD don’t ask me about my dreams they’re like 500 page novels minimum everytime >< But yeah in the last one, it was a Battle Royale like setting, a limited area in which we had to survive by 1) finding food, food you needed to team up with other people to catch/reach or whatever, based on each individual’s special ability (I couldn’t be killed by extreme temperatures, which proved useful), or 2) Killing “the enemy”, and we had no idea what “the enemy” was. It started off with some cooperation, quickly turned to bloodshed, I ended up taking this sweet girl under my protection, anyway she ended up being the enemy, it was horrendous.

8. Are you a nature person?

Nope. I’m always happy to be taken out for outdoor activities, but unless someone offers I’m not just gonna go on my own, except for my runs.

9. What’s your favorite thing to do to relieve stress?

Daydream

10. Do you have any other blogs you’d like people to check out?

Nope

11. Marvel, DC, or neither?

Neither

12. What do you want out of 2018?

The most important relationship of my life is currently going to shit. I want it to stop hurting so much. I haven’t yet decided if that means fixing it, or getting over it and/or replacing it. 

13. Do you hold grudges?

Tbh congrats if you manage to hurt/offend me, it means I already loved you a LOT. Now, if you do hurt me badly enough then, yeah, I rarely forgive, I never forget. 

14. Who is your favorite Disney hero/heroine?

Belle and Rapunzel

15. Do you consider yourself a positive person?

No, but then I look at some people, and think, ok probably yes

16. What is something you love that’s underrated?

Danganronpa, can y’all do me a favour and play it so we can obsess together

17. What is your dream job?

Actress / voice actress

18. If you could live anywhere in the world, where bitch? 

Eh, home is where the heart is, still looking

19. When was the last time you faced a fear and how did it go?

I spoke up after being disappointed by someone. It went way worse than I’d ever imagined. So obviously now I’m too hurt and shocked to say I’m hurt and shocked lmao so yeah this is going great

20. Which would you prefer to read: poetry, fiction, or non-fiction?

Fiction all the way

21. Where do you feel most at ease?

My bedroom at my parent’s place I suppose, especially if I can hear mom singing downstairs while she cooks. Bonus points if my brother is around trying to study, and all the neighbors’ cats are chasing each other all around the house again (it’s the best thing, guys).

im tagging: ..... I’m über late on this ain’t I D: ignore if done, but @sugarplum-senpai @monsoondownpour @omglevixeren @milleandra-nebula @miss-lovelynn @sparkly-icelander

[hyukorkook]

boyfriend!jaebum

A/N  hey guys this is writer aish I’ve decided to keep all my scenarios and au’s on this blog so my main @yeol2bean can only be for my fangirl stuff and reblogging stuff. so in celebration of JJ project’s comeback, here’s boyfriend!jaebum you can find the rest of my boyfriend series here

The kind of frustrating boyfriend who’d never accept his feelings or acknowledge them in front of you, for fear of letting himself be loved.

Jaebum’s biggest issue in the ordeal of finding and staying in love, is just himself. Everytime he finds himself around someone that he actually wants to spoil and spend his life with, he always forces himself to consider his career or all the troublesome things that could lead to a happy ending. His default setting is pessimism. But it’s really impossible to do that around you

You find yourself backstage at one of got7’s concerts. Your friend was an intern at a management company that helped out during events and honestly you were just there to drop off some juice and food for her and her coworkers. You had heard a lot of tales about how the backstage of a concert looked and felt like and you knew it was no easy feat. But you hadn’t expected your friend to barrel at you when you saw her and drag you to the waiting room because one makeup intern hadn’t showed up and there were 7 minutes left to the stage and one of the got7 members had just woken up and there was no one to do makeup for him because everyone was going crazy.

You held her hand and tried to assure her that it really wasn’t your place and you didn’t wanna mess with the idols and get yourself (or worse – her) kicked out because of some mistake. But in her words, “it’s like code red right now and me talking to you just might get me kicked out y/n PLEASE SAVE MY LIFE” ofcourse a friend in need must be helped so you find yourself with a huge (alarming) makeup set and in front of a sleeping jaebum

You tried to get some instructions from the girl working on youngjae next to you, trying your best to understand everything in whisper yells, trying not to wake up jaebum or anyone sleeping behind him. Jinyoung occasionally looks up and eventually passes his manager’s phone with a picture of their last stage with jaebum’s makeup as a guide. You whisper a quick thank you and get working but the minute your fingers touch his skin, jb jerks awake and holds your wrist tightly and dazedly asks

“who the hell are you?”

Though rolling your eyes is a very good option, you don’t have time for that. So you tug your wrist out, murmur a quick ‘the makeup girl’ and keep working on his face. Every few minutes, his eyes keep darting around him, still suspicious. He even tries to ask youngjae for help but youngjae is too busy belting out songs and warming up his throat and eventually jb resigns back into his seat and people are yelling @ you to finish this quick because THE MC IS ON THE STAGE ALREADY GUYS

You can see that every minute makes jb even more nervous so while you’re adding the last bit of mineral powder to set his makeup in place and surveying his hair, you hold onto his wrist. His eyes dart back to you, absolutely shit terrified and he looks at you warily. But you manage to smile at him and go “you can’t go wrong when you look like this ok? Im putting my bets on you.” And while he’s perplexed as hell, you boop his nose and walk out to find your friend

Jinyoung obviously smirks to himself behind the script to his new drama

By the time you’re out, your friend is in the clear and the concert begins and you say your goodbyes and promise her you’ll meet her later for gossip and coffee or something

And nobody mentions anything of that evening except that one time your friend asked how you managed to be in such close proximity with jb and didn’t scream because she knew you were a fan and you were like ‘listen I was tyna d e a l but also the poor boy was so nervous I really couldn’t scream and scare him even more. He looked like a cat dreading a bath’

But is that the end of it???? No because jb just can’t forget this cool and chic girl who walked into his life (aka dressing room) and did his makeup, gave him a smooth af pep talk and walked out just as suavely. But ofcourse he’s got a team to lead and performances to perform and concerts to do and like he can’t possibly ask his manager to track down someone amirite so he keeps mum

But jinyoung cannot handle how passive aggressive jaebum has become because everytime he sees a new female staff at a GOT7ing shoot or a photoshoot or around the office, he does a double take and creepily stares at them from afar because he keeps expecting you to show up again out of the blue. So jinyoung takes it upon himself finally and he pops up by your friend at their next music bank stage like ‘hey who’s that friend of yours that keeps giving you juice and stuff?’ and your friend is so flustERED AF because jinyoung the prince is talking to her but she gets her shit together soon enough like why she’s just a mom friend why do you wanna know

And jinyoung being the absolute savage he is, SPILLS.

So jinyoung and your friend get into a secret (unnecessarily elaborate) mission to bring about a natural meeting between the two of you and jinyoung basically drags jb to a café you were supposed to meet your friend at, late in the evening. It’s a weekday and most of the crowd has gone home for dinner and the café is nearly closing and you are sending the last of your emails and finishing up work (maybe updating tumblr idk) and jinyoung and jb walk in and you don’t notice them because who cares your friend will find you but jaebum just yells “MAKEUP GIRL” and you legit wanna put your head down like guys it’s been a long day don’t @ me (a/n this is me in real life guys) but you look up anyway to see JB STALKING TOWARDS YOU LIKE A PANTHER AND HE JUST

“what do you mean place your bets on me? You just walked off like that?? What was I supposed to think??

You are quite shook at this point and you’re just watching jb glare at you confused and sit back because he’s also confused about why he’s behaving like this, next to a very smug jinyoung and your friend who carefully slinks into your booth and you’re just looking from one person to another and you’re super low on human strength to communicate so you just make out a bare ‘wait what?’ before jinyoung and your friend decide to SKIDADDLE and leave the two of you to maybe  get something to eat? Drink? Make it a date? Idk you guys go crazy!

Jaebum, who by now has finally realized that you are very lost, offers to buy you food and you refuse out of habit and he just shakes his head and gets up and offhandedly mutters over his shoulder ‘if you don’t come along I’ll just order whatever for you’ so you fucking get off your arse and follow him like a lost puppy.

When your order is all settled and the barista gets to work you just turn to him and ask him what the hell is he doing here and wow why is this so comfortable? You just spoke to him like he was some sot of long term friend you hadn’t seen in a while? And he chuckles under his breath because you said all of that out loud and he replies, ‘honestly I don’t know what’s happening to me either but I’ve been looking forward to seeing you again’

And wow im jaebum we did not know you could flirt so well and he just shrugs like well I didn’t know either.

You guys get to talking and exchange numbers and meet up often for casual food dates blah blah you guys know the drill but that’s not even the fun part

Jb is CONVINCED that he’ll never get a normal life of just being a boyfriend with you, out in the sun, enjoying the day and you’re like CHALLENGE ACCEPTED and you take it upon yourself to plan dates with him where you can take him out but he won’t be stalked by fans or anything and that is. Hard

So you come up with the weirdest date ideas and you have to pull a lot of strings to make that happen like the time you asked one of your lawyer friends if he could help you sneak onto the terrace of his building so jaebum and you could have a picnic and look at the skyline from there and jb is just like ‘how did you manage to do this??? I can see everyone but no one can see me??’

And on days when there is a baseball match or like graduation in schools, you decide THIS IS THE DAY and you take him to spots that are frequented by high school kids like lets say a famous café strip or some quaint little beach drive and nobody there really cares about him because the kids are at their graduation and he’s so shook because this was such a brilliant idea why did he never think of this

One time you guys took a late night bus to a small coastal town and spent the day in the most remote places that were only frequented by locals and the fisherwomen cooed over how you and jaebum looked so cute walking by the sea, holding hands and trying to take care of each other and jb is so happy because even adults that aren’t related to him, approve of you

But as your relationship progresses you realise that jb is just a very simple man like his idea day is just perform for his fans, have a successful practice day, maybe get inspired and write some lyrics and make progress on the album, and come home + strip to his shorts + make dinner with you

He’s so domestic, he loves making dinner with you. He doesn’t care if you’re good or if you’re making Korean food or whatever. He says that just cutting vegetables in the same space as you, without any words and just jazz playing in the background makes him calm. On really bad days, he looks forward to this time and if he is too tired he’ll sit on the kitchen counter with a carrot or a cucumber and just watch you cook and listen to you talk about your day because he doesn’t have the energy to talk but he thinks listening to what each other has to say is the most important part of a relationship

Such a random hand holder like you won’t even see it coming. He would love it if your hands are smaller than his and everytime you hold hands his brain just explodes with ‘OHMYGOD THEIR HANDS ARE SO SMALL AND CUTE MUST PROTECT ASDFGHJKL”

Nsfw time. Jaebum is bed is a force to be reckoned with because this man is feral, let me tell you a definite strong dom with the most simple but sensual kinks like he just loves neck biting and tracing your collarbone with his lips. Absolutely adores tummy kisses and will put in all his efforts to kiss every inch of your skin but hopes for nothing in return

Will worship the very earth you walk upon if you change things up a little and press kisses to the inside of his elbows and behind his ears and trace your tongue over the outline of his bellybutton and will fucking lose it if you graze your nails down to his navel and he’s just like smh just let me do you already

Not very patient.  Not very quiet. Always moans like he’s seething in anger but he’s just legit trying to keep himself in check from BITING INTO YOUR SKIN and like taking you from here to Neverland wow

A sucker for forehead kisses, especially in the mornings when he’s barely awake but he can feel every inch of your skin next to him

Jb is such a warm pessimistic angtsy sweetheart he deserves all the love guys.

[imtiredofthis1-blog]

what am i going through

i can’t stop

i really cannot i want to i want to

to stop dreaming to stop remembering

it’s so vivid to me and each state i remember so swell

im not feeling well no not anymore

me accepting this this

hurts..

i wasted two years to you

i dont say it with pride i say it with bitter thought

why couldn’t ive been more alive and well with you

am i really obsessed with you..

man i really rotating time as i think about you

i think about yrs ago forming a sacred essence

i hate myself and i keep getting my face wet

i just can’t stop it’s driving me nuts

im accepting this but everytime i confirm

or conform

i say it’s not true...

please take me from this place i don’t belong here..

i really do not

im afraid of my thoughts and i’m afraid of my reality

i wanna be riche and i wanna be a pomme

how can i tun away how can tun from this

god only knows but internally i am a god just like anyone else

nevermind

______________________________________________________\\

it’s 11:32 closer to 33

i have an interview tomorrow and i’ve been trying to sleep for a while.. but i really can’t.. i don’t know why i keep pulling you in and out of my life or mentality... why am i so weird.. is this nooo i can’t say that cause i know other humans feel this way during break ups.. things that mean a lot to them can’t just disintegrate and be forgotten like a snap.. anyways i hope it goes well so i can juggle two jobs.. i need too i want it.. i keep getting bad vibes here and i’ve been trying to save but it’s hard i can’t we’ll i can but i’d rather not take bread from them they well he gets destructive and try’s to power move me.. it’s unhealthy this vicinity is unhealthy.. i need a friend i need some help.. my grandma called me well i called her to thank her for the present on christmas.. she’s willing to help me through college and i’m just in despair or should i lessen the term im grateful im dead grateful i need help... fafsa won’t work cause my mother won’t. budge just like my father back in 2014-15 child’s and petty i hate them but they brought me to here they birthed me and i can’t say much about my father but my mother.. i feel the minute i was in womb thst she believed it would be a beautiful fruition and that i would be a gift a great gift and she treasured me.. cause i think about girls that abort and i’m all for it but the prior thoughts of destroying life not in a negative manner but more of like oh what will this little guy become if birthed here... so i thank her more and i appreciate the gift of life but boy oh boy so i wish wasn’t alive :/ lol idk

life is weird

i am weird

thank you mom i love you whether we have a bad one or good

anyways it usually goes well for me i mean i basically just walked in told them my application online wasn’t going through and that i just came in to drop a resume and it got awkward cause i insisted or rather demanded ??? an interview lol and i got it.. but i really really hope i get it thst be sweet getting discounts on socks i really like and clothes or accessories .. and then i think about you and wish to share this with you like i shared my sw card so you can get your cake for cheaper..

im done being negative i can still feel it inside but it’s just such a drain and maybe i will strike with jealousy on my next and id have to figure it out then probably sit down with her and talk about our relationship and how we wish to pan it out... but then i just lay here typing this and conclude that i feel solitude would be better although i’m so butthurt or hurt that i destroyed something so beautiful to gorgeous in heart .. i built something and destroyed it.. i’m sorry

im sorry for the waste of time.. the destructive behavior.. the petty.. the midnight leave..

i was just hurt and i can’t invalidate or dismiss your feelings but i played on you and made you unhappy.. tbh a lot of things i didn’t know like i would just say things cause things were accustomed to me like the way i talk i spoke without censor because it’s just spontaneous or me like i would drive a train a thought and hop onto another train that didn’t coerrelate and expected people to get the gist

yeah

i am working in that

maybe it’s just who i am..

what i can do is develop it

or what i should say is i’m gonna develop it

but right now my focus is more money a desperation from this “home” then cooking.. then writing and letting it all out on this demo idea

i talk to myself about why i still sit in these realm of i can’t let go.. most of the time it’s cause i’m in that state of ohhhh we were young and i loved you since like i was 14 cause i wanna say it was around 2008-10 i had another memory earlier that surface around the time 2014 but i can’t recall 😡 anyways cause of that earlier stated mentality that’s probably why i can’t let go cause i wanna love someone who knew me since we were young.. “hey dad how did you meet mom and how long do you guys know eachother” that’s what i think about... and i really try to sway from this badly.. cause it’s all dreams..

i never posted anything for that girl you hate i just posted stuff cause i was sad i proceeded to block her cause it was a bit unhealthy

i dont really chat with anyone except my friends from california but they’re so distant that i just hold from that

i wanna go back down there.. really bad

i wanna stay here and help the nest of my sibs but it’s just unhealthier and ubhealthier veing here..

plus another reason i wanna go is to fog this because i can’t i won’t be able to continue my day if i pass you.. it’s all weird to me and you know maybe you’re the same like how you saw him at the mall and it gave you anxiety ..