#aplatonic aromantic

[aaa-battery-not-rechargeable]

A does not stand for ally, it stands for ASPECS. aros and aces and agenders and aplatonics and ASPECS damn it.

i will fucking swallow a motherfucker whole if I hear that argument again.

[entropy-sea-system]

Do not assume what kinds of relationships aromantics do or do not want. Do not assume friendship is universal. Do not imply that the only connections aros can have are friendship just bc you think all aros are plato favorable, romance averse, ace, and sex averse.

Do not imply that every aro must want and immensely value friendship bc its 'the only thing left other than romance and I assume sex is out of the equation'. Aplatonic and/or plato averse or nonfriending aros exist. We matter. Aros who are romance favorable and/or experience some romantic attraction exist.

Aros who are sex favorable and/or alloaro or are otherwise not ace exist. There are other relationship types than the ones I mention in this post, such as qpr's. Don't forget aros who may not fit your ideas of what an aro person looks like.

[Do not fucking add your commentary on how you like friendship or whatever. You're allowed to like friendship obviously! Just maybe try to give a shit about ppl who don't, and don't fucking derail when we talk about our experiences. Make your own damn post or literally add on the numerous posts about liking friendship. I don't care if this post makes you sad for some reason. Alloplatonics and/or Plato favorable ppl you can rb but don't clown.]

Reblog this edited version instead of the original please!

[lovelessrage]

Reminder that deconstructing the prioritization of romance doesn't mean creating new pedestals for friendship and other types of relationship! Levelling the playing field means levelling out all of it. I've reblogged posts about it and made my own before, but aros do have a major platonormativity problem, and it won't go away on its own. There needs to be an active effort in understanding platonormativity and how aro communities can play into it.

Aplatonic aros are here and we're not going away. Siding with platonormativity and openly agreeing with it doesn't make us go away. It just makes us feel unsafe around spaces we should be welcomed into, and devalues our aro experience.

[aroworlds]

[image description: three sets of two lockscreens featuring a design of repeated arrows banded in the colours of various aromantic spectrum pride flags. The left lockscreen features the arrows set against a gradient background matching its respective flag colours; the right features the arrows set against a plain white background. Flags included are: aplatonic aromantic (lime green/green/blue/purple/grey), mesi aro-ace (blue/light grey/grey/light blue/grey/light grey/blue) and nebulaquoi (maroon/white/dark cyan/navy).]

Aro Arrow Lockscreens

Flags: Aplatonic Aromantic, Mesi Aro-Ace, Nebulaquoi.

I’ve turned my aro arrows into lockscreens! All backgrounds/wallpapers are available for free personal or non-commercial use.

For flag creator credits, please see @aroflagarchive​.

[papercranesandpride]

I follow so many aroapl people on here that now when I see those standard aro posts about like really caring for friends or whatever, my brain genuinely short circuits a little going, "wait aros can have friends? Huh?"

[thetisming]

people who exclude straight trans people and straight aspec people are my worst enemies. btw

[zephyr-heart]

[aromantic-spinda]

A podcast run by an asexual, an aromantic, and an aplatonic called "AAA" and every time an episode starts, one of them welcomes the audience by screaming into the mic

"hello and welcome to AAA!"

[infiniteorangethethird]

sure "romantic" isn't the only type of love but also "love" isn't the only type of positive feeling. So maybe stop insisting everyone needs love to be happy and accept that loveless ppl exist? Pretty please?

[transcendental-dustpan]

Hey if you’re aspec in any way and you are reading this…

You’re queer as fuckin’ hell and that’s epic, keep doing what you do. Y’all’re valid

[loveless-yadriel]

Had a soulmate tarot reading done, in small hopeless aromantic hopes that I had a chance at love.

They described my cat. They even felt guided to say a name and it was my fucking cats name. I think they absolutely believed they were talking about a human girl but nope, just the goofiest cat that could ever roam. This is honestly the perfect possible outcome.

[aaa-battery-not-rechargeable]

I'm trying to think of a way to word this that doesn't sound combative or insulting but if you're aromantic, asexual, and aplatonic does that mean you don't make any kind of connection with anyone at all? Romantic, sexual, and platonic are the only kinds of relationships I understand so what can you have for others if you have none of those feelings at all?

thanks for asking, I totally get it that it's confusing, it is sometimes for me too

so with my aromanticism and asexuality, those are more easily understood and 'mainstream' (so to speak) identities with clearer definitions and larger communities of people, so I can find them for myself more easily

my aromanticism means that I don't desire romantic relationships or actions with anyone, and my asexuality means I don't desire sexual actions or thoughts with anyone

with aplatonic it's a little harder to define. for me, it means that I don't have the urge to make friends or be friends with more people. I do HAVE friends, but it was kind of like an extrovert deciding that I'm their friend now. I don't actively hate friendships if they come my way, and my friends are special to me, but i don't seek out new friends or feel 'fulfilled' by any friendships (because I feel fulfilled just being me). so I don't NEED friends, but they're nice to have if they come my way.

there is connection I do feel though! I'm very picky and VERY protective of my familial relationships, to the point where even though someone might not be blood related to me, I can consider them family. I have a younger brother, and I value him over all other people. sometimes I think of the kids I take care of at summer camp as family.

I have connections with people intellectually and professionally, and I see those as types of relationship dynamics too. I love to talk with people about a shared interest or hobby, and it doesn't necessarily have to be a friendship. I talk with people I work with or professionals in my field of interest, and make connections that way.

as for what I 'have for others' I don't see basing my worth on how I relate to other people or what I 'offer' to them as a good way to live life. if I'm just happy being myself without any kind of traditional relationship, and it's not harming anyone, it's okay. there's no moral downfall in just being happy alone, im whole on my own.

[entropy-sea-system]

Stop being platonormative in your 'how to know if you're aro' posts challenge

[lovelessrage]

Platonic love isn't an "aro thing". Platonic love's presence doesn't make something aro. While platonic love may be a part of certain people's individual experiences [such as labels that don't distinguish between love types, or people who just care about it a lot], painting it as the one path to making "good rep", as the way to "be" aro, and as the pinnacle of aro experiences is very exclusionary. This might be how you experience being aro, but it's also part of the alloplatonic aro experience. That isn't even mentioning the fact that aros don't hold a monopoly on platonic love, and many alloromos feel just as strongly about it.

Aro culture isn't being alloplatonic. Aplatonic aros have always been here. We deserve recognition, respect, and being included in conversations surrounding how we, as aros, are represented.

[ayspec]

“friendships are not lesser forms of relationships than romantic ones!” yeah!

“the idea that there’s a relationship hierarchy is bs!!” precisely!!

“you don’t need romance to be a good or ‘full’ person!!!” yes, yes, yes!!!

“because instead you can have friendship!!!! because aros still love, they just love their friends!! it’s not like we’re heartless monsters!! <333”

…sigh.

[papercranesandpride]

Hard boiled wonderland and the end of the world by murakami doesnt have super strong relationships. Really good book too.

Ooo thank you! I just placed a hold on it at my library!