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lamentationsofalonelypotato · 16 days

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Chapter 7: It's Not A Date

Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV

Summary: When you decided to work with Butcher and his merry band of supe hunters to take down Homelander, you neve expected to be saddled with a sullen, grumpy, jerk like Soldier Boy when the job was done. The more you're around him the more you hate him, but you can't help but wonder, is he really as big a jerk as you think? Reader is a supe with plant powers. This takes place in an AU about a month after the end of The Boys Season 3, in which Butcher has let Soldier Boy continue to work with him on his team. (I'm real bad at summaries, please forgive me!)

Tropes: Enemies to Lovers (Not in this chapter), Slow Burn, Age Difference (Reader is in her 20s), Soft Ben/ Soldier Boy.

Word Count: 4K

Warnings: I'm going to label this 18+ because Soldier Boy (he's a warning and everyone knows it), sexism, swearing, mentions of sex, sexual innuendo, sexual tension. Ben/Soldier Boy might be a little bit OOC.

Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person.

A/N: This chapter is just a little bit smaller than the others and it's a little bit of a filler, but I promise that it is preparing for the coming angst!

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

“I can’t believe you let him around those children. What were you thinking?” Annie asks wielding a curling iron like a sword. "He's a terrible influence!"

It was t-minus one hour and thirty minutes before the party started and Annie was doing your hair and makeup for the mission. Butcher decided that Ben and you would infiltrate and see if you could find anything suspicious inside, while Butcher, Frenchie, and Mm watched the streets outside the building.

Your chair was turned away from the scuffed vanity in Hughie's bedroom at the apartment the team shared. Why he had that you weren't sure, but you figured it must be for Annie. Her makeup bag, hair spray, gel, cream, curler, flat iron, and other paraphernalia was littering the soft butter colored top. There were more things sitting there than you knew the names of.

Annie had always been better at things like that than you. She'd done your hair and makeup for every high school dance and date you went on, so you'd agreed to let her do your hair and makeup for the mission. Not to mention you trusted her not to make you look too over the top or absolutely ridiculous.

As soon as she had gotten you into Hughie's bedroom she had practically pounced on you, demanding to know everything about the past few days that you had spent living in the apartment with Ben. You'd foolishly told her that you'd had to babysit the Wilson's children last night and she was horrified that you let them anywhere near him.

Granted you also would have had the same reaction if someone had told you that they had let Soldier Boy around little children.

But he wasn't terrible to them. You think to yourself. He was actually kind of sweet. It was the first time that you'd ever associate that word with Ben, but you believed that it was true. You remember how he sat with Marty at the kitchen table and allowed her to make a friendship bracelet for him. A bracelet, that he hadn't thrown away, despite what he'd told you after she gave it to him. You'd found it on the sink in the bathroom this morning when you got up, given a place of honor in the ceramic jewelry dish you used for your bracelets.

After Ben had gone out on his "date" you'd cleaned up, made your last cup of noodle, and then went to bed hoping to forget exactly what Ben was doing. The problem was that you were disappointed and you had no idea why. You'd tossed and turned thinking about Ben and the time you'd spent together watching the kids, until finally falling into an unsatisfying slumber.

Ben had sauntered through the front door at 3 am smelling like perfume and sweat, his hair tousled and standing up like someone had ran their fingers through it, while you were drinking a calming herbal tea from your favorite mug at the kitchen table in a post-nightmare haze. You'd had them your whole life following the accident that took the lives of your parents and was thankful that one hadn't hit when Ben was home. You didn't want to explain to him why you had woken up screaming and gasping for air just as you’d done since you were twelve years old.

When you'd first moved in to the apartment and you'd had the nightmare, Mike had banged against your front door, shouting for you to answer. He'd thought that someone was trying to kill you in the middle of the night, but you'd explained to him that you had nightmares and that you were okay.

The next time it happened, Mike's mother had left a large basket of herbal tea and homemade muffins outside the door of your apartment. Even though the muffins were almost inedible, it was incredibly sweet. You might not have wanted to date Mike, but he and his mother were some of the sweetest people you'd ever met.

When he saw you up, Ben had made a comment about you waiting up for him and stated that he was ready to go again if that's what you wanted, but you'd only waved your hand and rolled your eyes while taking another sip from the mug. You weren’t in the mood, not when you could still feel the chill of sweat against your skin and hear the sound of metal on concrete from the dream. He had sat at the table across from you and asked why you were still awake, you'd lied and told him that you couldn't sleep. You knew that he knew you were lying, but he only shrugged and went to take a shower while you finished your tea and fled to your bedroom to avoid him coming out in a towel again.

"He wouldn't leave. What was I supposed to do? Make him walk the plank?" You respond as Annie inserts the warm curling iron into your hair.

"He's just so-" She tugs your hair back as she curls it.

"It wasn't as bad as you think.” You consider thinking about how he let Martha make him a friendship bracelet and how he had held Joshua and made Joshua laugh. "He was actually kind of nice to Marty and to Josh.”

"Nice? Are you crazy! The guy's got a nuclear reactor in his chest and an uncontrollable temper. Why do you think it would be okay for him to be around children?”

"He didn't get angry or lose control. And I can't believe you're chastising me about this, the other day you were all for Ben and me sleeping together!"

"That wouldn't involve children." She takes another piece of your hair, gently wrapping it around the curling iron.

"Yeah, but it would still be him close to another human being-"

“He seems to be perfectly in control when he has sex. Or else there would be a string of destroyed apartments all over manhattan.”

"I can't believe you." You huff.

"So?"

"So what?"

"Have you guys kissed again?" She asks.

"I shouldn't have told you that." You grumble under your breath. "And can you keep your voice down? Ben can hear you."

He was in his old bedroom getting ready for the mission. The bedroom was exactly next to Annie and Hughie's bedroom, and you were sure that he was listening to Annie and you talk.

Because he can't keep his big nose out of anything. You think. Or rather can't keep his perfectly structured nose out of other people's business.

"I'm sure he has better things to do than listen to the two of us talk." Annie responds, but she begins to blast the ABBA gold album from her Bluetooth speaker, filling the room with the sound of 'Our Last Summer' "Come on-"

"Come on what?" You open one of your eyes to glare at her. "I told you it wasn't going to happen again."

"Why not?"

"You know why not. Ben is- Ben. And I don't want to waste my time with someone who's not interested in having a relationship." You shut your eye again to avoid her gaze.

"It's not a waste of time if he looks like that-" She trails off, inserting the curling iron one more time.

"I will agree that Ben is good-looking, but that's all he is. He doesn't care about other people, he only cares about himself and what feels good." You say it, but for the first time since you'd met Ben you weren't sure if it was true. Not after he spent his entire day yesterday helping you with the kids and not after he had bought you that bookshelf.

He cared enough to get that for you. A little voice whispers. But why? You wonder again. Why would he care about something as little as a bookshelf?

"You're making that face again." Annie says. "Did something happen?"

"No. I mean- he-" You sigh to yourself. "He keeps confusing me."

"How?"

"Well the other day he bought me a bookshelf."

"What? Why?"

"Because he said that stack of books in my bedroom was annoying him." You roll your eyes behind your eyelids.

"Why was he in your bedroom?" Annie's smirk is audible and you feel your cheeks heat.

"Shut up. He needed some clothes and I had some from the last time Darren stayed with me-"

Annie audibly groans when you mention your brother's name. They didn't get along. She thought that he was manipulative and that he used you. But you didn't see it. He was your brother, your blood, the only family you had left beside your grandmother and Annie.

"Please tell me he's not coming by soon. If he does I will be busy doing anything else."

"I don't know why the two of you can't just get along-" You sigh.

"Because he's the worst." Annie states loudly, dropping the curling iron and bringing the mascara brush up to your eyes.

"Can we please not have this conversation again?"

"Fine. Close." Annie holds up the mascara brush to your eyes. "Did you at least join one of those online dating apps or try to go on a date?"

"It’s been 3 days since we last talked about this-“ You feel the gentle stroke of the brush against your eyelashes.

“So?”

“No I haven’t.”

"Y/n-"

"I know, I know. I mean Jake did try to ask me out the other day but-"

"He WHAT?" Annie squeals, awkwardness about your brother forgotten. "Next time lead with that! Did you go out with him? Did you guys talk all night long?" Annie is hoping from foot to foot now, practically dancing to the music still blasting from the speaker on the dresser.

"I said no." You open your eyes to look at your friend.

"WHAT! Why?" She looks like you kicked a puppy. "He's so perfect for you! He likes plants and he's funny and he's got a great sense of humor, plus he's gorgeous and he's interested in you-"

"First he wanted to do something today and I knew Butcher had plans for me. Second, I didn't know he was asking me out, Ben told me he was." You close your eyes again so Annie can continue to do your makeup.

"Wait, Ben was there when he asked you out?"

"We went to IKEA to get a couch for the apartment and Jake showed up and asked me out." You explain.

"You took Ben to IKEA?"

"He'd never gone there before, can you believe that?" It made you smile as you remembered how surprised he had been when you went inside. You’d had fun with him, walking around, testing out the couches, it almost felt… normal. And you kind of got the impression that Ben had a good time too. It was kind of cute when he did everyday things, when you saw him in normal settings and he was just a little bit awkward because he still couldn't figure out how to act in another time period.

"Yes I can, he's a million years old. Let's circle back to you saying no to the PERFECT man."

"He's not a million." You defend Ben. "And Jake's not perfect." You frown to yourself, thinking about the fact that Jake wasn't a supe. It wasn't something that you had cared about before, but ever since Ben brought up the idea of you "snapping Jake in half" it scared you.

Because what if I did? What if I hurt him? You didn’t know how Ben had sex so often with people who weren't supes. Maybe he just doesn't care if he does. Or maybe he’s done it so much that he’s able to control himself.

"What do you mean? I thought you liked him?"

"I mean I do. He's kind and he understands me and he loves plants as much as I do, but-" You shrug, feeling Annie begin to apply eyeliner. "I don't want to make things complicated. I mean we work together, he’s my boss. What if it doesn’t work out? Then I’d have to quit and I like my job.”

“I mean that’s kind of hot-“

“Hot in what? A sexual harassment kind of way?”

“No. It’s not harassment if it’s two consenting adults.”

“I’m still not sure that it’s a good idea.” You mutter more to yourself. But this time your mind didn’t go to Jake and you having a relationship even though he was your boss, instead it goes right to Ben. You can't help but slip into the fantasy of dating Ben, of you and him trying something new-

You shake off the image. He doesn’t want a relationship, doesn’t think that’s important. The thought is almost like a mantra, trying to convince yourself to push past Ben’s charm and good looks, but this time it makes you consider something else. Maybe he doesn’t think it’s important now, but maybe he used to think it was before Countess.

You’d heard the stories, seen the newspaper articles and clips of film of Ben and her together, remembered what Hughie said that Ben had wanted a family with her that Ben had told her that he loved her. That meant at some point in Ben’s life he had loved someone else, cared for them, wanted to be more than just fuck buddies.

Maybe he's just afraid to fall again, because he's not sure someone else will be there to catch him. Maybe Ben doesn't want to admit that he cares for anyone else because he's afraid that they'll push him away or stab him in the back the way that Countess did. And maybe he hides it all underneath the macho attitude.

Ben is strong. He told me that he didn't need anyone else. You press your lips together in a tight line. But I think he does.

You hated that she’d hurt him. You hated that she’d pushed him away, told him she never loved him, and stabbed him in the back. You couldn’t imagine doing that to someone, telling them that you loved them, and manipulating them with the promise of love. It almost made you nauseous to consider it. It made you want to travel back in time to the moment she stabbed him in the back and shove a bouquet of sunflowers up where the sun don't shine.

You pause on the thought. You weren't a terribly violent person, but if someone ever hurt your friends your anger was legendary, practically divine. You'd never thought that you'd want to do something for Ben, but you were realizing more and more that Ben was becoming your friend. You weren't sure how you felt about that.

“Alright what if he wasn’t your boss.” Annie gently brushes eyeshadow over your eyelids. “Then would you go out with him?”

“But he is my boss.”

“Use your imagination.”

The song has ended and there’s an awkward pause between the end of it and the slow beginning of the next one.

“I mean yes?” You shrug. “I can see myself with him. He’s the kind of person I’d want to date. He cares about other people, he remembers what kind of coffee I like, he actually contributes to the conversation, he makes me laugh, he actually gets my jokes, he’s nice to sit with, he doesn’t get under my skin-“ As you list each of those things you couldn't stop your mind from comparing Jake to Ben. You didn't know when Ben became the level by which you judged other men, but it had happened sometime in the past few days and you didn't know what it meant.

But Ben did remember what kind of coffee I like and he does contribute to conversations, well, he contributes with a disgusting comment… The thought trails off when you remember the small conversations that you'd had with Ben that weren't sexual in nature, when the two of you watched the movie on the couch and talked briefly about your parents, when Ben asked you how your day was the other day back at the apartment, and when the two of you talked on the couch while the children slept between the two of you. In those moments you had seen another side of Ben, the side that he seemed to hide away from everyone else, but not from you, not all the time.

Plus Ben is kind of funny sometimes, disgusting but funny. Doesn’t understand my jokes. And yes he gets under my skin but sometimes it’s kind of exciting and nice to have that happen. With Jake sometimes he’s just too happy or too eager to agree with me.

"Hmm." Annie considers. "How did Ben react when Jake asked you out?”

You don’t answer immediately. “Normal.”

"You hesitated"

"No I didn’t."

"Yes you did! He reacted didn’t he?!” Annie pokes you with her finger

"No he didn’t.” You lie.

“He did! Holy shit he was jealous wasn’t he?”

"No he wasn’t.” You swat her hand away. "He was just opinioned."

He sure looked jealous. You think to yourself remembering the way he glared at Jake from the other side of the room. The memory of the way his eyes darkened when he told you exactly why he wasn't jealous and exactly what he would do to you to make you forget all about Jake sends an involuntary shiver down your spine.

"Yeah. Opinionated over why you shouldn't go out with Jake because Ben wants you all to himself." Annie crows.

"Shut-"

"But it doesn't matter. Because Ben's going to have a heart attack when he sees you wearing this." Annie steps back from you. "My work here is done. Try to make it to the mission without ripping each other's clothes off."

"We are not going to-"

Annie spins your chair back to the mirror and your next words dry up.

Your hair is perfectly curled back from your face, the lipstick is a dark shade of crimson that makes your lips look fuller and more plump, the eye make up is dark and dusky making the color of your eyes pop against the darkness in a mysterious alluring way that seems almost hypnotic, and your face is shaded and contoured so well that you look dangerous and sexy.

"I'll take the silence as a 'Thank you Annie! You're so beautiful and talented and you're the best friend I've ever had!'" She laughs, standing back behind you with her arms crossed over her chest.

"I mean all of that is true, but-" You stand up from the chair to get a better look. "You've really outdone yourself."

"Well thank you. Had to. It's your first date with Ben." She makes goo-goo eyes and you try to punch her in the shoulder, but she dodges it.

"Shut up. It's not." You look down at the dress that Butcher picked out for you to wear. "I love you, but I hate Butcher."

The dress was a red scrap of fabric that clung to your curves, but left very little to the imagination. It was completely backless with an exaggerated wrinkle that fell just over the top of your ass. The front was sinched at the back of your neck secured only by a small piece of fabric that you were afraid would break at any moment and fell open in a "v" that stopped just under the swell of your breasts. There was a large prominent slit that cut up the left side of the floor length gown that stopped just shy of the top of your thigh. Annie had cinched a black choker around your neck to match the black pair of stilettos you wore

Personally, you though that the stilettos were overkill, you had no idea how the hell you were going to run after the supe if you saw him, let alone fight him.

"You look so hot." Annie says pleased. "You really should wear that all the time babe. I'd take you out to dinner just to show you off."

"You're the worst." You groan.

"I love you too honey." She winks. "Now come on. Butcher and the others are waiting for us." She turns off the speaker and walks out the door of the bedroom, but you linger there, looking at yourself in the mirror one more time.

You'd never worn anything remotely like this before, but even you had to admit, you looked good.

“Come on Poppet. You can’t hide in there forever.” Butcher chuckles from the living room.

He’s having too much fun with this. You huff to yourself finally leaving the bedroom to make your grand entrance, grabbing the black bejeweled clutch as you do.

Butcher, Frenchie, Annie, and Hughie are waiting outside the door while Kimiko sits on the couch scribbling away.

Hughie's mouth drops open, Butcher gives an approving shrug, and Frenchie lets out a breath.

"You look beautiful." Frenchie takes your hand and gives you an appreciative twirl.

"Shut up." Your cheeks redden.

Hughie is still looking speechless at you. "I told you." Annie states elbowing him with a proud smile.

“You look-“ Hughie stutters.

“Good enough to eat.” Ben finishes, appearing in the hallway to your right. His hand traces the curve of your hip, thumb ghosting over your bare back.

“Just because I’m dressed like a hooker, doesn’t mean my brain’s not working.” You slap his hand away ignoring the warm feeling that remains where he touched you. You could feel your heart beat begin to pick up in your chest.

“Baby I love your brain-“ Ben smiles, eyes tracing your figure. “But I’ll be damned if I don’t love your body more.”

You felt your cheeks turn the same shade as your dress with his compliment before you can stop them. It was difficult to pretend that you didn't feel any attraction for him, not when he looked so good.

He had trimmed his beard and brushed back his dark hair, so you could see his emerald colored eyes gleaming. He was wearing a black suit with a white button up shirt, but chose not to wear a black tie, instead unbuttoning the top few buttons to give just a hint of his muscular chest beneath.

Why does he have to look so good all the damn time?

“Shut up.” You grumble turning back to Butcher. “So are you happy? I dressed up, my IQ dropped a billion points.”

“Ecstatic poppet.” Butcher grins taking a sip from the cup of tea in his hand. “Now remember anything happens, you detain the supe, no killing."

“He’s talking to you.” You elbow Ben.

Ben shrugs. “I won't apologize for doing my job."

You sigh again and walk towards where Kimiko is writing in one of her workbooks on the couch.

"You look hot." She signs at you.

It had been difficult to learn the sign language she used, but you liked to think that you had a handle on it so you could understand simple conversations. When things got too confusing she would use her phone.

"I know. I was mad at Butcher at first for picking this dress, but I kind of like it." You sign back. "Don’t tell Butcher I said that."

She crosses her fingers over her heart. "Soldier Boy is looking at you."

"He’s always looking at me. I'm glad I can't read minds. I don’t want to know what he’s thinking."

Kimiko snorts, raising her hand to sign "I think the look on his face says it all."

You half turn and look at where Ben is again, he’s not talking to Butcher like you thought he was, he’s staring at you, pupils dilated, eyes darkening in a way that makes your heart feel like it's beating so hard it'll explode out of your ribcage.

No. No. Keep it together. Heart of a warrior.

"You two have fun!" Annie smirks widely, taking a picture of Ben and you like you're going to prom and you know she's going to send the photo to taunt you with it later.

“Shall we?” You raise an eyebrow.

“Ladies first.” Ben smirks.

You roll your eyes at him as you walk to the front door of the apartment. “Don’t pretend to be a gentleman Gramps. We both know you just want to look at my ass.”

“I’ll never get tired of looking Doll, especially not when you’re wearing something like that.”

A/N: I know this chapter is a little bit of a filler, but I wanted to give Annie and the reader some time together, aka. Annie telling the reader to do the one thing that we ALL know she should do. 😂

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killergee · 2 months

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Hi, hi! First thing first, im in love with your hoshina x designer weapon reader! It's really warm my heart!! (I LOVE IT TO THE CORE HEHBFJSHDHC😭🫶🫶🫶 BLESS U)

Can i request you (this is kinda awkward) i want to see Highschool AU! For Hoshina x Reader. Kendo player! Hoshina x Archer! Reader👉👈 i would love to see them bantering each other (of if it's not Highschool AU! You can use the close range user! Bf x long range user! Gf thing!)

Thank you!

Ahhh my first request, how exciting! Sorry for posting so late. So many things have been happening lately. Also had to do some research and ended up watching tsurune LOL.

Here's a bunch of little stories of your life as Archer! Reader x Kendo! Hoshina.

Part 2 (one shot)

Synopsis: The club captains of the kendo and the kyudo (archery) club don't seem to get along. Or rather, that's how the club members see it.

---------------------------

"Oi, what do ya think you're doing? The kendo club's got this gym booked for today."

Toppled on top of each, the members of the kendo club huddled nervously outside the door to their gym. They could only take small peaks and glances from their place as they were all too scared to step foot inside.

All except one.

The Captain of the Kendo team, Hoshina, was the only one who dared to enter the gym. Standing tall with his arms crossed, he gave you a menacing glare.

Rising from your kneeling position, you exhaled a tired breath and put your training bow down. "Oh, sorry, I didn't see your name on the registrar, so I presumed the gym was empty and booked it." Despite the courteous words, your apology dripped of insincerity and a smidge of condescension. "Had you actually done your job correctly, this could've been avoided."

The members of your own club shifted awkwardly. Exchanging knowing glances, they braced themselves to watch their Captain go at it once again with the rival club Captain.

Hoshina lets out a scoff as he rolled his eyes at your attitude. He ignored your comment and continued on with his interrogration. "What are ya even doing here, ya can't shoot in here. Why aren't you in the kyudo hall?"

"It's under repair, and kyudo isn't only about shooting. I gotta teach the newbies the correct form before they can even touch a bow." You stated before offering a fake smile. "Why don't you go build your stamina with some laps? It's not good to slack on basic fitness."

"Shouldn't I be saying that to you? When's the last time ya used your legs?"

After a brief moment, Hoshina flashed his own small smile, although there was nothing friendly behind it. He leaned down until his face was a mere couple inches from yours. He knew you hated the height difference. That you hated the fact that there was something he had over you. Going by the tiniest twitch in your perfectly crafted smile, he knew he was right.

"Hey, give me the room, and I'll play nice and let you watch us practice. Maybe then you'll learn something of actual worth." He suggested, feeling a deep satisfaction at the slight clench of your fist.

"I don't understand the need to swing a big sword. Overcompensating for something?"

"Ah, and I suppose hitting a massive target from far away is much more impressive."

"Oh my, if you think a target that's only thirty-six centimeters is massive, then I'm definitely worried for you."

"Are dick jokes the only jokes you can make? Are you a child?"

"Sorry, did I hit too close to home?"

A vein popped on his cheek. He could never really get a handle on your snake-like tongue.

Everyone felt the heavy tension and chill in the air. The first years had trouble believing that the two people squabbling like children were their beloved Captains.

You were known for your kindness and elegance. But you knew when to be soft and when to push harder. Where you went, people's eyes would follow whether consciously or not. You were the most talented kyudo archer the school has ever seen and an equally good captain.

Hoshina was among the top strongest kendo player in the division. Diligent. Attentive. Trustworthy. His laidback attitude attracted a lot of people, but when his serious nature slipped through during matches—that's when it was impossible to take your eyes off of him.

You two rarely crossed paths, but when you did, it was a blood bath. You two brought out the worst in each other. Or maybe you simply brought out each other's competitive streak.

All the members of their respective club could only pray for the day the two of you stop bickering.

---------------------------------

"I heard you guys passed the preliminaries," you said as you sat and watched him practice. It was late into the evening, and only the two of you were still in school. You had locked up the kyudo hall but saw how the lights were still on in the kendo dojo. Curiosity got the best of you, and you went to see who was still practicing.

"Congrats," you said quietly, barely audible to anyone around you.

"Oh, sorry, what was that? Awww, are ya congratulatin' me? I'm so honoured, oh, glorious captain." He jested back, pausing his activities against the training dummy. He stopped because he's had enough practice and shouldn't overexert himself. He definitely didn't stop because he wouldn't hear you against the sound of the strikes.

"Whatever, your opponents were shit anyways. It would've been harder for you to lose."

He lets out a low whistle at your words.

"Way to ruin the moment." He said, beginning to take off his armor. Placing his wooden sword at the stand, he peeled off his gloves.

Then, realization hit Hoshina, and he froze. The corner of his lip curled into a dangerous smirk as he turned to look at you.

"Wait, does that mean ya watched me compete?"

You flushed a pretty shade of pink and looked away from his amused eyes.

"Well, we're hosting the tournament this year, and I happened to pass by the dojo, so I just took a look."

"Right..." He chuckled. "Your preliminaries are tomorrow, right?"

You nod your head as you get up from your spot. The way you stretched your arms above your head reminded him of a cat.

"Yup, and we're gonna show you guys why we're number one in the division, unlike you guys who are only what again? Right, second."

"Hope you miss." He grunted in response. Though, despite the gruff words, Hoshina found that there wasn't actually any bite to his remarks nowadays. His once heated bitter words are now nothing more than poorly disguised teases.

At hearing your chuckle, he looked up at you, and his breath catches in his throat.

"Me? Miss?"

The look in your eyes was hypnotizing.

"Never."

---------------------------------------------------

Why others seemed to admire you was beyond Hoshina's understanding. You were immature, vain, cocky, rude, and knew exactly which buttons to push to annoy him. If people saw the side of you he got to see, they would run for the hills.

Walking from the main school building to the dojo, he heard the faint but recognizable sound of the kyudo bow releasing an arrow.

Ah, that's right. You should be playing right now.

He stopped in his place as he looked to the direction of the sound. He had to pass the kyudo hall anyway to get to the dojo, is what he told himself before he changed course to take the longer route to the dojo.

There was a crowd gathered around the hall by the time he made it there. Not wanting to be seen, he kept to the edges of the crowd but still in a good enough spot that he had a good view of the archers.

Hoshina thinks to himself that he'll only stay to watch your first shot as he watched you ceremoniously kneel with your bow and arrow.

However, he found himself stuck in his place as he watched your elegant and meticulous gestures. Like a moth to a flame, he couldn't tear his eyes away from your figure as you drew your bow. He didn't know much about kyudo, but he couldn't help but think that your draw was beautiful.

Everything about you screamed confidence and assurance. With the twang of the bow string, the arrow released and hit dead centre of the target.

Like always.

By the time he realized he's stayed longer than he should've, you had fired 5 shots. Not a single arrow missed the target.

The cocky smile that bloomed on your face as you lowered the bow and admired your work made his heart race.

Huh... so that's why so many people are head over heels for you.

He left before your team could celebrate the victory.

---------------------------------------------------

As the season continued, you two made it a habit to stay later than usual when practicing. Whoever would finish first would go to the other and watch or tell them to pack it up.

As captains in your last year, both of you needed to win your tournaments.

"Don't ya ever get tired? Or are the rumours true and you're actually a robot?" Hoshina said with his head resting on his bag as he sat and watched you.

"Only partly, actually," you quipped back before drawing another arrow. "One more shot."

"And how many times have ya said that?" He asked looking at your target filled with dozens of arrows. Unlike what he was used to seeing, a third of your shots were off target.

"Can't afford to miss. "

"Ya need to go home."

"No"

Hoshina rolled his eyes at your stubborness. "You think this is going to help ya? You're just burnin' yourself out."

Although you lowered your bow at that, your focus does not move away from your target. "We were one point away from not advancing to finals. I need to be perfect. My team is depending on me. I can't afford to drag my team down or disappoint them."

At one point in time, he'd have paid someone to bring you down a peg. Now, however, his heart twisted at seeing you doubting yourself.

"Listen, I know the pressure better than anyone else. This tournament is important to me too. But ya just need to have faith in the skills that you've built up over these years. You've earned the title of best kyudo player for a reason." He sat up straighter when you finally turned to look at him. Rubbing the back of his neck, he continued, "also, have faith in your team. They've worked hard and don't want to disappoint you either. Don't forget you're in a team, afterall."

You stared at him for a moment before giggling. Your giggle turned into a full-blown laugh at his pout.

"Now why's that so funny?"

"No, no," you managed to say as you try to collect your composure. "I just never imagined getting a pep talk from my arch nemesis."

A smile replaced Hoshina's pout. "I'm your arch nemesis?"

"Aren't I yours?" You jested back as you began putting away your equipment.

Were you? Arch nemesis wouldn't be the words he'd use to describe you. He didn't quite like the idea of you only being a rival to him.

His on the other hand. Now, that didn't sound too bad.

With your back turned to him, he called out to you, making you turn to him.

"Here."

You caught whatever he threw at you before it could hit you. Sitting in your palm was a key chain with a cat shaped charm, and beside it, an omamori charm with the embroidery "victory."

"Hasn't really been working on me, so you might as well try it," he said, looking rather bashful.

You let out another laugh at his actions. "Can't be owing you, here's mine," you said amused, removing the charm that hung on your bag and tossing it to him.

"It might give you my luck, but I doubt it'll be able to give you my amazing skills. So don't put too much pressure on it."

The charm was of a heart with an arrow through it and a wooden good-luck charm with the engraving "grind them to dust."

"How fitting," hoshina said outloud as he held the charm in his palm.

"Oh yea," you chuckled. "The statement is quite aggressive, but I thought it was funny"

"Hmmm? Oh yea, that too." Before you could even think twice about his statement, he closed his palm around the charm and gave you a determined look.

"Let's win this."

You couldn't help but smile. "That goes without saying."

---------------------------------------------------

Bonus:

"Hey, isn't that Hoshina's charm?" One of your club members asked curiously as they stretched on the ground. Although the rest of the members pretended they weren't listening in, they were dying to know why you had it. They were able to spot it right away when they saw it on your school bag. It was the charm that Hoshina kept on his bag for all the years they've known him. They also couldn't forget how the Kendo members were forced to stay after school to search for the charm when he lost it.

"Yeah," you responded matter of factly as you stood and watched them.

"Why? I thought you two hated each other?"

"Now, who ever told you that?" You responded slyly.

Their mouths hung open at your statement. Were you gaslighting them? Or were you just pretending you didn't pick a fight with Hoshina every chance you got.

"Oi, y/n hurry up. I'm hungry"

At the voice, they all snapped their heads to look at the owner of the charm himself. Leaning against the doorframe, he was in his school uniform with his bag tucked under his arm.

"Yea, yea, coming old man, don't be so pushy," you said, making your way towards him. When he turned to head out, the members saw your unforgettable charm hanging from his bag.

"You buying lunch this time or is it my turn?" They heard you say as the both of you walked by the window of the gym.

"Don't remember. Let's just say it's my turn. " Hoshina responded with what they think was a smile.

"What the fuck just happened."

#soshiro hoshina x reader #hoshina soshiro x reader #y/n #self insert #kaiju no.8 fanfic #kaijuu 8 gou

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charlotteking23 · 9 months

Note

Hi! I really enjoy your stories! I was wondering if you could write a batfam x batmom reader story about the boys (not including bruce) getting magically age reversed (i.e. dick becomes damian's age, damian becomes Dick's age, and Jason and Tim swap ages) and the 4 of them getting into shenanigans and chaos. And Batmom teasing and coddling them.

This sounds amazing, and sorry it took so long to post but I was writing it and my computer started resetting and it did not save this draft so I had to start over.

WHAT HAPPENED!!!

Bruce decided to take his kids to the Justice League hall, where he was showing them the Machine Hall which was VERY DANGEROUS. During the middle of the tour, there was an emergency alert, deciding to leave his kids in said dangerous room but why not.

"Jason, don't touch that Dad said it's dangerous", said Dick was already tired of Jason's shenanigans, and playing pranks on everyone. "Quit being such a buzzkill, and have fun no adults are around", Jason said in a playful tone. Jason was very unserious sometimes but when he's mad he will kill you. "You know Jason, you don't act very mature for an Adult and BTW there are adults around you and Dick", Tim was the smart one always pointing out his brother's mistakes in a not-so-kind way. Damian just stood there glaring at his brother fighting like little children.

"Oh what, touching a machine is going to get us killed", said Jason. "I hope it kills you first", Damian said. But It was too late for Jason had touched the machine despite Dick's warning.

Suddenly a bright light blinded the boys. "AHHHHHH", screamed the boys, The bright light dimmed down and the boys saw each other but of different ages. Dick and Damian's ages were switched so Dick was 12 and Damian was 25. So were Jason and Tim, Jason was 17 and Tim was 23.

The boys were freaking out, trying hard to comprehend the situation. Damian started to immediately blame Jason for this while Dick was trying to calm himself down from having a panic attack. Lastly, Tim wasn't that affected and went looking at the machine Jason touched. "Hey guys look at this" Stated Tim when the boys looked at where Tim was pointing They realized... "Jason you Idiot you touch an age switch Machine", said Dick. "Aww shit, I didn't think this would happen," said Jason. "No fucking duh Jason, if you knew this would not have happened," Damian said while hitting Jason on the back of his head.

Bruce later found out with a panic attack and was scared of how he would tell his wife this happened under his care. But he also grounded Jason for 1 month again.

Timeskip to the manor

"Hey, kids"..... was the first thing Batmom had said before seeing her kids not looking like her kids. "WHAT HAPPENED?" Her Dick looks so young and cute and her Dami looks so tall and mature, Jason looks like a teenager and Tim seemed well older.

"Mom we can explain", Dick said and explained the whole situation of what happened because of Jason's stupidity. "Well, where was your father when this happened?" What Tim had told her was not the answer she wanted. "You left the kids alone in a dangerous machine room", Batmom continued scolding Bruce and her kids for this misfortune but internally screaming about how cute her kids looked.

No matter how hard she tried, she absolutely adored Dick and Jason, for it reminded her when they were young. And then she started crying with Tim and Damian feeling sad they had grown up so tall and handsome even though they were still the same by heart externally they looked different.

DICK

Being a 12-year-old was not as bad as he thought or so he thought. His mother became even more protective watching his every move and she refused to let him go whenever they hugged each other. "Mom, you have to let me go", "NO!," his mother shouted. "But...Mom, I can't breathe". "Then breathe later."

During this chaos, he found out he had to go to school, don't ask why. The whole day was torture I mean who wants to go to school after already graduating not Dick, to make matters worse he had to hang out with Jon. He was the only kid he knew and he didn't want to socialize with kids younger than him.

Curfew for patroling was a lot different since he was 12, he had to be home at 10:00 and he couldn't go anywhere without an escort because he was too "young" to drive.

And even the Titans made fun of his appearance, I mean their brave and powerful leader was a 12-year-old and a short one. "Can you guys just help me!" Dick shouted in anger. "No, can do, not until we finished laughing at how short you are", kon said laughing at Dick who couldn't even reach the high cabinets.

JASON

"Jason, honey what are you doing? you need to get up", his mother said in her usual calm voice. here he was lying in his bed with nothing to do, it was only 7:30 am. "Why, I have nothing going on. Didn't I tell you, you're going to school to collect Tim's work so he can complete it at home", Batmom said while opening his blinds. "But Mama"..."No buts get up and get ready for school". Jason was not happy and grumbled the whole time getting ready for school.

Jason was getting ready for patrol putting on his suit and wishing his Mama goodbye. Before she told him the horrible news, He had a curfew. His mother used the excuse that growing boys needed energy and he had school in the morning. "Mom, please I don't need a curfew I am fine". "No, and that's final Jason", his mother said in a stern voice.

good news He could drive and hang out unlike Dick who needed to be escorted when driving, Man did Jason crack up and tease Dick. HA, you can't drive what a loser, Dick was not happy and vowed he would get Jason back.

With Jason's curfews, he had to sneak out but lucky for him, he had done it so many times. The only problem is his mama was watching him like a hawk, but when everyone was asleep he decided to climb out of his window. Only to be stopped by the infamous Batmom and her sidekick Batman, grounding him for another month. "Hey Mom, how did you know I was sneaking out and where I would be?", "hmm, Dick told me". "Damn it," Jason said cursing under his breath passing by a laughing Dick when coming upstairs towards his room.

TIM

was Tim happy? Yes, yes he was. Switching ages with Jason seemed bad but it turned out good when he found out he didn't have to go to school, he had the whole day to himself. While Jason had to go to his school and get all his assessments, It was good because it only took him an hour to complete the work Jason gave him.

First thing first, He explained to Stephanie what happened after she accidentally came to the manor expecting to see her boyfriend but instead saw a tall, handsome adult like Tim. It took some time for her to cope with what happened but after she was furious with Jason. After he came back from school she hit him with her slipper right in the face. "OWWWW what Hell Stephanie! why did you hurt me", Jason said in shock. "You turned my boyfriend into well this," Stephanie said with her hands still griping the slipper. "MOM, why are you standing there, do something!" but to Jason's surprise, his mother did nothing and instead told him, he deserved it.

Tim had no curfew which meant rubbing it in his brother's face. HAHA, Damian and Tim both laughed at Dick and Jason going home from patrols while they get to stay. Shut up, both of them grumbled not liking the feeling of being teased. Since Tim was legally an adult, why not have alcohol, after one glass of wine he got drunk. "HEy GUyS, LoOK at ME I aM a BAnANa", Then proceeded to start crying when Titanic came on, "NOOOOO, HOw COuLd JAcK DIe!!!" while the whole Bat-family saw this, well now we know he has no alcohol tolerance said Dick, with Jason and his mother laughing their asses off. Damian looked at his father to say something only for him to be astonished, trying to find the proper words only for nothing to come out. And Alfred gets Tim some tissues and water.

DAMIAN

Damian hated everything and everyone except for his mother of course. He Knew from the beginning this was bad and turns out he was right it was chaos.

Damian didn't do anything different except now he can drive legally, he could drive before but wasn't allowed for you know only being 12. He used this opportunity to get away from his crazy family.

Damian still hang out with Jon when he was out of school and gossiped about Dick and how he was at school, it was hilarious. Though Dick was not happy about it.

Unlike Tim, Damian had a high alcohol tolerance. "Dami, you are surprisingly good at drinking and not getting drunk easily, have you drunk before?". "No, Ummi"..... but could not continue, how could he lie to his Ummi so he told the truth. "Yes, Ummi I already had my first drink". "WAIT, WITH WHO?" said Batmom in a shout, ready to throw someone out the window. "With Dad", and that was not the answer she was looking for. "BRUCEEEEE!!!!," screamed Batmom. "Yes honey", Bruce said panting. "Did you take Damian to have his first drink?". "Umm oh no is that the Joker breaking into the bank again, Oh No better stop him bye", and with that, he left like he was Flash already out the door. And to say the least, Batmom was not happy.

Time skip after 3 days

Some random mad scientist Bruce found on the black market reversed the kid's ages. Dick was 25, Jason was 23, Tim was 17 and Damian was 12.

Everything was back to normal, SIKE. Batmom punished everyone in the manor except for Alfred of course for all the things they did when reversed. Bruce was grounded and sleeping on the couch leaving the kids alone in a Dangerous machine room and keeping the fact that Damian had his first drink.

Batmom was so happy but still sad. Of course, she's happy her kids are back to normal but her two eldest had to leave to go back to their house, it was heartbreaking. So to make their mom feel better they did Family Game Night 😉.

#batfam x reader #bruce wayne x reader #batmom #batman #batfam x batmom #batmom imagine #batmom imagines #batmom!reader #bruce wayne #jason todd #tim drake #dick grayson #damian wayne #damian al ghul #alfred pennyworth

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hyunniesgirl · 10 months

Text

Another Love | Part 4

Summary: you've been hopelessly in love with Han since you were children. One night you confess your feelings to him.

Words count: 6,639

Warnings for this chapter: angst(as usual)

A/N: I'm sorry it took me a bit longer to write this part, I'm just in a weird place right now. I'm doubting a lot about my skills as a writer and that leads me to believe everything I write sucks so this was a bit harder to write, I hope you all like it though.

Jisung has been dreaming about you lately. Going back to every little memory he has with you, watching all the signs you gave him while he was oblivious to you, to your feelings.

It's been almost a week since Han ended things with Lia. The things she said are still stuck in his head, he can't be in love with you. Not after rejecting you. Not after everything you went through to get over him. Not now, when you're happy with someone else.

Things are going back to the way they were before, except that now your roles are reversed, he's the one hanging on your every word and movement, all the little details about you look fascinating to him. He's never felt this way before.

You're not avoiding him anymore. Things fell into place slowly, you started having dinner together again, talking about your day. Then you got back to making coffee for him in the morning, waking him up with the nice scent so he wouldn't be too grumpy woking up so early.

He has a mission now: to stop these strange thoughts he's having. Even if he is indeed feeling this way about you, he lost his chance. He knows he did. Right now, he wants to focus on being a good friend to you, the same as he was before the confession happened.

Jisung just didn't expect how he would feel seeing you with Jeongho again. You invited all your friends to dinner in a nice restaurant, to officially introduce your boyfriend to everyone.

This must be how you felt seeing him with all his previous partners, you must have felt this ache in your chest, as if someone was holding your heart and squeezing it to their heart's content.

You look pretty, hair tied in a ponytail and a dress he never saw before, maybe it's a gift from your boyfriend, he wouldn't know. He avoids talking about your relationship, too selfish to handle the same pain you did for so many years.

Your friendship is getting back to what it was, even though he screwed up really badly, you were the bigger person and forgave him, so he has no right feeling this way about you.

Jisung knows it would be better for you and for him if you didn't come back to the apartment but he's too greedy, he wants you close to him.

This whole problem began because he was greedy, afterall. He didn't want to stay away from you, then he hurt you again and again trying to fix things. Now he just wants to make things right, he just wants you to be happy.

You're smiling so brightly it actually makes his heart skip a beat. He sips from his drink, trying to calm his heart a bit and watch as the others try to make small talk.

“So how did you meet y/n?” Chan asks Jeongho.

“I had the biggest crush on her in middle school but she mercilessly rejected me”, Jeongho answers, looking at you and smiling playfully.

“I thought he had lost a bet or something”, you defend yourself.

“Why would you think that?” Han asks, surprised and you stare at him for a second before shrugging. Of course Jisung was not the only reason for you to reject Jeongho, you were just learning about your feelings at that time. You just couldn't get your head around why someone older and handsome like Jeongho would want to have anything to do with you.

“Y/N was one of the prettiest girls in our school”, Han comments, not understanding why you would feel like that.

He always thought you were pretty, that's why he always complimented you and gave you clothes saying they would look good on you.

“I think teenagers are just insecure. I guess it's part of growing up”, you sip from your wine glass.

Jisung never thought you were insecure about anything by the way you carried yourself with your head high, always so sure about everything you put your mind into. Maybe there's too much he doesn't know about you.

The rest of the dinner goes well, your friends are being nice and trying to make Jeongho comfortable, you're happy about it. Everything seems to be falling into place with your best friend by your side being his normal self and your boyfriend, the guy you're falling in love with being just perfect. Your heart is finally healing, you're moving on, things are working out. You couldn't wish for anything else, you just want things to stay like this forever.

“Are you happy?” Jisung asks when you're outside the restaurant, Jeongho stepped out to take a call from work and left you and your friends alone. One by one they called it a night, saying their goodbyes and leaving you and Han alone.

You stare at him for a moment before answering.

“Yes, I am”, you're not sure why he wants to know and not even sure why you're thinking so much before answering.

Jisung smiles, a sincere and bright smile.

“I'm glad”, he says, “I want you to be happy”

You are a bit taken aback, you didn't expect him to react this way, he almost sounds like a grown up now.

“Thanks, I-”

“I'm sorry I kept you waiting”, Jeongho's voice cuts you out. He slides his arm over your shoulders pulling you closer.

“I should get going”, Jisung says, turning his gaze away from you and your boyfriend.

“Aren't you going home?” You ask and he shakes his head, he's not sure if he can stay at the same place with you two for much longer. “Oh, are you going to Lia's?”

There's not a bit of discomfort in your face, so he just nods. He's not sure if now is the best moment to tell you about his situation with Lia.

“Okay, see you tomorrow then”, you hesitate, not sure if it's appropriate, but you try not thinking too much, throwing your arms around him, squeezing him into a hug. You would never think twice about hugging him before your confession, there's no need for you to make it awkward now.

You're trying to get things back to the way they were and Jisung notices that, he's grateful. So the only thing he can do is wrap his arms around your waist, hugging you back.

Jisung didn't want to lie, but he's afraid it may be uncomfortable to you if he says he's not with Lia anymore. And he's afraid you'll be able to see right through him, see that he is giving in to the strange feelings he's trying so hard to avoid.

He ends up sleeping on Chan's couch, if he could call that ‘sleeping’. Everytime he closes his eyes, you show up in his mind, smiling, making a joke, just looking at him. Everytime he finally managed to fall asleep, you would be there, together with your boyfriend, giggling and kissing him while Jisung just watched. He would wake up sweating and stare at the ceiling for at least ten minutes before trying to sleep again.

>><<

After pondering what he wanted to do from now on, Jisung decided he should have some closure with Lia. He didn't like the way things ended with her, he really liked her until a certain point and above all, she is a good person. Even though he didn't want to, he ended up hurting her and he should apologize for that.

Awkward. That's the best word to explain the situation that Jisung finds himself in right now. Lia is on the other side of the table, glaring at him like she could kill him with the power of her mind.

“What is it that you want?” She asks, coldly.

He clears his throat, trying to gather some courage.

“I want to apologize”, he says, “I shouldn't have lead you on even though I already knew something was not right”, sighing he looks at her, biting his lower lip, “I'm just… confused, I ended up hurting you in the middle of this mess and I'm really sorry”

Lia looks at his eyes, staring deeply. She can feel his sincerity but she's not sure if only an apology is enough to make up for the pain he caused. She's not crazy, she knows people can't control how they feel most of the time. Maybe if he just admits he likes you, she'll feel at ease.

“So, have you finally accepted that you're in love with y/n?”

Jisung thinks for a bit, trying to put what he is feeling into words.

“I don't know if love is the right word”, he says, fidgeting with his fingers, “but I'm feeling some weird things around her, when she smiles or laughs, or even when she's doing nothing”, he covers his mouth with his hand in a slap, wide eyes, realizing he is talking about being in love with someone else with the girl that likes him.

Lia chuckles.

“It's alright, I'm pretty sure that's the definition of love though”, she sighs looking at Jisung. “Maybe you never felt that before”

It's not easy for her to be kind and comprehensive at the moment, but it's not like being mean is going to make him like her back. She's not actually even sure if she wants that anymore. Maybe her heart just accepted things ended, maybe she was already preparing herself for this since Han started acting differently, but the pain is not as great as she thought it would be. Maybe seeing him naively admitting his feelings made her have some sympathy for the mess he made of his relationship with you, maybe she didn't like him as much as she thought.

Since the beginning, there were too many maybes in this relationship. Lia knows she deserves better, she deserves someone who's sure about her, no maybes.

“I think I can forgive you, yeah”, she chuckles seeing Jisungs shocked face, “not now, obviously”, with a sigh, she looks deeply into his eyes, “you were always great to me before things started going wrong and I know you're not a bad person”, she stands up, “I'm actually feeling bad for you, with the mess you created I have no idea how you're going to fix it, but I'll cheer for you”, she puts her hand in his shoulder, squeezing it in reassurance. Lia leaves Jisung there, stuck in his head once more. At least that is something they both have in common, because he sure doesn't know how he's going to keep these strange feelings under control while fixing his relationship with you.

>><<

If Jisung had to rate his acting skills, he would be proud to say he deserves an award. He's succeeding at pretending not to be in love with you while maintaining a healthy friendship.

It's almost the same as it was before, except Jisung has to watch his every move. He's trying to act normal while trying to crush the onslaught of feelings in his chest everytime you laugh at one of his jokes, or when you just talk about your very normal day.

You both do your things during the day, have dinner together and talk or watch something before sleeping, that's your routine when Jeongho is not visiting.

You've been watching your phone lately, more than usual, is there something wrong? He's sure you're just waiting for Jeongho's call. Jisung has lost count of how many nights he spent listening to your laughs on the phone with your boyfriend, wishing it was him making you happy like that.

It's true, he's struggling. He's not sure how you managed to like him for so long without freaking out, because he's about to collapse and it's been just about a month since he came to terms with his feelings.

He feels bad just thinking about how much you must have suffered because of him, before and after your confession. Guilt is eating him alive, along with heartbreak.

He's been watching you for a while now, you are washing the dishes while talking about these kids you tutor and how smart they are, he's staring at you with heart eyes—you're not seeing—while he dries the dishes.

“I'm sure they can only learn so fast because it's you teaching them”, Jisung says.

You giggle to his compliment, bumping a shoulder into his.

“Should we watch a movie before going to bed?” You ask, drying your hands on your apron.

“I'm actually kinda sleepy”, Jisung laughs, he can only keep his feeling bottled for so long, he doesn't want to get careless and blurt out everything. He knows that if he gets too comfortable he'll feel at ease and you were always too good at making him tell you what's on his mind.

“Let's do it another time then”, you shrug, taking your phone out of your pocket and smiling when the screen brightens with Jeongho's name.

Han feels his chest tighten, he wants to throw up, he wants to cry, he wants to plead for you to not like someone else. But he can't do any of those things, not when you're so happy. So he won't be selfish, he'll think about you first and keep his distance.

>><<

It's been almost a month since the last time you saw Jeongho. He was not able to come by on the usual weekends because the company he works for is opening a new branch somewhere and he is involved in the project.

He's been busy, texting less and not even calling, so you start getting insecure. What if he's getting cold feet about your relationship? Maybe he met someone more interesting who's near him.

No. Jeongho wouldn't be like that. He would break up if he didn't like you anymore, you know him enough to know that.

When he calls saying he's coming to see you, you feel excited once again. You knew you were mistaken, it's not right to presume the worst just because he's a bit more busy. It must be nothing.

You just can't shake the feeling that you were going through the calm before the storm and now the bad weather is finally coming.

He's waiting for you at the restaurant of the hotel he's staying in, Jeongho is fidgeting with his fingers nervously, looking around until his eyes land on you. You smile at him, waving at him but he doesn't smile back.

“Hey”, you say, dropping your bag on the chair and sitting, “is there something wrong?”

“I received a promotion”, he says suddenly, he doesn't look happy about it.

“That's great”, you smile, taking his hand into yours to hold it, not really understanding his reaction.

He stares at your hands together, taking a deep breath before speaking again.

“Actually, the company wants me to go to Europe”, Jeongho says, fidgeting with his hands.

“Oh”, you frown, “for how long?”

“They are not sure about the exact period, but-”, he clears his throat, looking around, “they are projecting it to be between five and eight years”, he replies, feeling his breathing quickening.

“They want you to move there?” You repeat it to yourself, trying to absorb the information.

“They are trying to make an entry in the European market, so a team is needed there to develop the new branch”

“Okay, yeah”, you feel dizzy, “we can work with that, hm, I can- we can visit each other”, you nod, trying to organize your thoughts.

“Y/N-”, Jeongho starts, his voice fails and he stops for a moment before continuing. “Long distance works right now because we are a 2 hour flight away from each other, not 12 hours”

“What are you saying?” You feel all the air in your lungs escape, knowing exactly what he means but choosing not to believe it.

“I don't think we can keep doing this, I'm not sure our relationship is going to survive and-”, he sighs, running his hand through his hair, “I won't ask you to come with me”

“Why not? Why won't you ask me?” You plead, feeling tears brimming in your eyes. It's not logical what you're asking of him, but you don't want to hurt anymore, not again.

“How could I? I can't make you leave your whole life here, your family, your friends or college to go to a country where you know no one but me”, he explains, “I’ll be in charge of a large project, I'll have to stay late probably everyday and you're going to stay alone, how could I do that to you?”

“Don't you think that's for me to decide?” You ask, feeling your hands shaking. You put them in between your legs, trying not to show him the sight of your broken heart.

“I can't- I can't carry that guilt with me”, he says, “not knowing how happy you are here, if you go with me and things end up not working out I could never forgive myself”

“What if things work out? What if we are happy together forever? Did you consider it for a moment?” You ask, he's not looking at you. Jeongho is trying to hold his own tears, trying to be strong for you, “I guess this relationship is not worth you considering it”, you stand up, grabbing your bag.

He lifts his eyes to look at him, finding your quivering lips and the tears flooding from your eyes.

“Well, good luck then”, you tell him, turning around and walking out.

After walking far enough from the hotel, you let yourself crouch on the floor, scaring the people walking by. You are sobbing, trying to wipe the tears from your eyes, but they keep coming continuously.

You stand up again, walking, what are you supposed to do now? When are things going to finally get better for you? Since you confessed to Jisung things got worse over and over, you should have never told him about your feelings, maybe your life would have stayed the same.

The hurt you felt seeing him with other people was a pain you were already used to, but this? This is excruciating, it's the same all over again, the same as when Jisung rejected you. Will you ever feel complete again?

It's 3 a.m, Jisung went to the studio to work for a bit and to try to forget about everything else. His phone buzzes in his pocket, when he looks at the screen, your name is there. He doesn't think twice about answering, just to find your drunk voice on the other side of the call. He can't understand a thing you're saying just that you'll share your location with him.

He grabs the keys to his car, running to the parking lot, he drives for about thirty minutes until arriving where you are. The bar is empty, there are only employees cleaning and you're laying on the counter, unconscious.

“It's been a while since we closed, but we let her stay inside since it looks like she went through something”, the bartender tells Han when he gets closer.

“Thank you”, Jisung says, before trying to wake you up with no success. He sighs, looking around and thinking about what to do.

He slides one of your arms around his neck, putting one of his hands behind your back for support and the other underneath your knees, lifting you up.

Your face is puffy, he can see it now that he's looking so closely, you probably cried a lot but what would make you cry like that?

Jisung glances at you a few times during the ride home. You groan, whining something in your sleep, even crying a bit. That makes him even more worried.

He repeats the process of picking you up when he parks in front of your apartment, carrying you inside. You whimper all the way to the apartment, he knows you can wake up at any moment.

Han sits you on your bed, taking your coat off and helping you lay down, covering you with a blanket after taking off your shoes. Your makeup is all smeared, so he picks a wet tissue and starts rubbing your face, trying to take off everything he can.

You open your eyes slowly, seeing Jisung with a focused expression while whipping your face.

“What are you doing?” You ask, making him jump. He was so concentrated he didn't even see you waking up.

“I was trying to take your makeup off”, he says, “it's not good for you to sleep with it on your face”

“How did I come home?” You look around, stumbling a bit over your words.

“You don't remember calling me?” He asks and you shake your head. “I went to the bar to pick you up”

Jisung is still whipping your face while he talks, that's when you remember why you were in the bar in the first place and tears run out of your eyes again.

“What happened? Why are you crying like this?” He asks worriedly, helping you sit on the bed.

“I don't- everything goes wrong for me”, you say, sobbing. “Maybe I'm the problem”

Jisung sighs, pulling you into a hug and holding you tightly, feeling your tears soak his shirt. He's worried and doesn't know what to do, should he call Hannah? Or Jeongho? Jisung knows you went to meet with him earlier… wait, did that guy do this to you?

After you stop sobbing for a while, Jisung realizes you fell asleep in his embrace. He lies you on the bed, covering you with the blanket once more. He leaves a glass of water and some hangover medicine on your nightstand so you can take in the morning and prepares his bed on the floor.

You wake up to the bright sunlight coming from the window, your head hurts like crazy and you're so thirsty it seems like a thousand years since you last drank something.

You take the hangover medicine and the water, while sitting down, still a bit dizzy. When your feet touch the floor, it's not the hard ground they meet but something soft. Why is Jisung sleeping by your bedside?

He doesn't look a bit comfortable, although he seems fast asleep. You start poking him, trying to make him wake up, causing your friend to jump and hold your arm.

“Are you alright?” He asks, eyes widened.

You frown at the sight, it's been a while since you last saw Jisung this startled.

“Yeah”, you answer and he can finally let out the breath he didn't even notice was being held. “Why are you sleeping on the floor?”

He looks around for a bit as if he didn't understand why you were asking such a thing.

“Oh, I- hm- I was afraid you would need something so I stayed here just in case”, he tells you and you nod.

It's not an uncommon occurrence for you two to do this kind of thing, even when you were living with your parents. When one of you got sick, it was a tradition to stay by each other's side until the other felt better.

When you moved in with him, naturally, your drinking habits grew since you didn't have to worry about your parents anymore. Jisung was responsible for taking care of you when you came home wasted after partying with Hannah or even when you drunk with him and the boys, he made sure to stay sober enough to still be able to take you home and help you get to your room safely.

“Oh”, you answer, “thank you”

He kept staring at you, waiting for something you're not sure what is.

“Do you want to talk about the reason you got wasted last night?” He asks, awkwardly and the pain comes back all at once.

It was so nice, the period of numbness after waking up from a deep sleep, you wish you could keep feeling that way. Now, your hands are trembling again, just like last night, tears are brimming in your eyes and your lips are quivering. It's obvious to Jisung, you're trying not to cry.

He gets up, collecting the things he used to sleep, without looking at you, he doesn't want to make you any more uncomfortable.

“We don't have to talk about it”, he says, putting the blanket and pillow back in your wardrobe. “Do you want me to call Hannah?” He asks and you stare at him for a moment, nodding to his question, not really wanting to look at your phone.

You're scared Jeongho contacted you, you don't want to see him. But more than anything, you're scared he didn't try talking to you at all, because that means everything is really over.

It's pathetic, you know that break ups happen. But Jeongho was the first guy to ever make you feel the closest to what you ever felt for Jisung, no other could do that and you're scared no one ever will.

Hannah gets to your place about an hour after Jisung called her. She's huffing, hair messed up and puffy face.

“Were you sleeping?” You ask her and she takes a deep breath, seeing that you're okay.

“I'm going to kill that guy”, she yells out of the door to your room, “he made it seems like you were dying or something”

“If I was dying I'm pretty sure he would have taken me to the hospital”, you point out.

Hannah rolls her eyes, dropping her bag on the floor. Closing the door, she walks slowly to sit on your bed, she can clearly see that you cried a lot.

“So, did something happen?” She asks, you avoid her gaze, looking at anything but her face. You find your fingers much more interesting than any part of this conversation, actually. So you pay attention to them, playing on your lap.

“It's nothing”, you answer.

Hannah sighs, if you don't want to talk about it, it means it's bad.

“We don't have to talk about it right now”, she stretches her hand, taking yours and squeezing it. “But you will have to talk about it eventually”

It's your time to sigh now, she's right, you know that, but talking about it makes it real and you don't want it to be real.

“Jeongho broke up with me”, you rip the bandaid all at once.

Hannah gasps, she's speechless. How can this be? She thought he was head over heels for you, so why?

“His company is sending him to Europe and he doesn't want to do long distance”, you feel the tears brimming into your eyes again, voice cracking, “or take me with him”

It's the first time in her life Hannah doesn't know what to say. Your love life is such a mess, worse than hers, so she doesn't have any advice or any comfort to give you.

“Honey, I…”, she tries, but what is she supposed to say? ‘I am sorry?’, that's not it, ‘he is an asshole?’ nothing of the sort.

Looking from outside the situation, Jeongho is being logical, they still are in their honeymoon phase of the relationship, everything is perfect at that time. For most people, problems start to arise after some time. However, when you're in love, you don't want logical outputs, you want what your heart wants.

Hannah is saved by a knock on the door. Han's head pops inside the room and he observes for a moment trying to assess the situation.

“I bought some things you like”, he says, “I'll be going out, so you have the apartment all to yourselves”

He wants you to feel comfortable right now, he doesn't know exactly what happened but you're sad. Jisung knows just letting you enjoy your afternoon with Hannah in the apartment is not going to make things better for whatever is making you feel so down, but he knows you are going to feel livelier after some time with Hannah.

He goes out with Hyunjin, who's buying a present for his mother. It's hot, so if his friend didn't ask very nicely he wouldn't have accepted to go to the mall, since they have to wear hoods and masks. The fact that you're home, crying your eyes out for something he has no clue about, made him want to go out too. It hurts seeing you sad and it's even worse because he can't do anything about it, not when he doesn't know what's happening.

They are looking at bags, maybe he should get you something? You are not really a materialistic person, he's not sure if giving you an expensive present is going to help at all, maybe he should get you that webtoon print you've been talking about, they should definitely have it in the bookstore next door.

When Jisung turns around to tell Hyunjin they should stop at the bookstore, he sees Jeongho. He's looking at bags too, trying to figure out which one he should choose.

Is he giving you a gift too? Maybe he did something and you fought, that's why you were crying so much. Even remembering the way you cried as soon as you woke up makes his heart ache.

Jisung walks to Jeongho, not sure how to initiate a conversation but he feels like he should try and help in some way.

“Hey”, he says, watching Jeongho turn around and look at him.

“Jisung, how are you doing?” He asks, arms crossed in front of chest.

“Fine, are you choosing a gift for y/n?” He asks, awkwardly, “I don't think she likes purple”, he points out observing the bags Jeongho was looking at.

“It's actually for my mother”, he clears his throat, frowning, “didn't y/n tell you?”

“Tell me what?” Jisung asks, confused and Jeongho nods.

“So she didn't”, he sighs, “we broke up”, he struggles to say it.

Jisung's eyes dart directly to Jeongho's face, now he can see the eyebags on his face and how tired he looks.

“Why?” Jisung panics, you shouldn't have to go through another heartbreak.

“I don't think it's something you should know about, if she didn't tell you”, Jeongho shrugs.

“Well, can't you fix it? Whatever it is that is wrong?” He asks, carefully.

Jeongho sighs, he wishes there was something he could do about it, but he's a coward who's too afraid of taking such a big step in the beginning of a relationship.

“I’m afraid I can't”, he says, “take care of her”

Jisung is speechless, he has no idea what to do, so he just watches as Jeongho chooses a gift and walks tiredly out of the store.

Jisung arrives after killing some time outside, he was out for almost the entire day and hopes that you could enjoy a bit of your day with Hannah. He doesn't know if he should bring up his encounter with Jeongho or if he should talk about what your, now ex, boyfriend told him.

He shouldn't mention it, if you didn't tell him about it, it's because you're not ready for you to know and he gets that. Han is not sure about what he's feeling. It hurts his heart to see you in so much pain but he doesn't want to overstep the boundaries you're setting.

So when he enters the house, he sees you and Hannah watching a movie, he greets you both and goes to his room. You clearly cried more since he left and he won't be able to stay in your presence without trying to comfort you.

>><<

Things are difficult for you at the moment. Even though your love for Jeongho never got to its full potential, it's still love. You're mourning what you could have had with him had things been different, you wake up in the middle of the night and can't sleep anymore, feeling your chest hurting and remembering it's over.

It all sank in when he didn't contact you anymore, you're sure he's hurting too but you had hoped that you two could find a solution around this cruel puzzle.

“Should we go out?” Hannah asks while you're watching a drama, burying your sorrows in ice cream.

“I'm not really in the mood”, you say. You haven't cried for some time now, you're too tired, maybe your tears finally dried up.

“I know you don't feel like it”, Hannah sighs, looking at your apathetic face, worriedly, “but I think you should have some fresh air, you have been stuck in this apartment for a week now, it's not healthy”

You sigh, she's right, you know she is, but you can't really find the strength to doll up and go out.

“We don't have to go to a party or anything crowded”, she says, seeing the resigned look on your face. “We can just go to a cafe or something, anything”, she pleads.

You nod, sighing in defeat, maybe a walk can really lift your mood a bit.

Hannah jumps out of the sofa, taking the ice cream from your hands. She talks excitedly about what kind of things you two can do but can't really follow what she's saying, your head is still numb.

You walk around for a bit, looking at clothes in the stores nearby, doing just about anything to think of anything but your break up.

It's already night when you two decide to eat something, there's this restaurant that's kinda hidden so there's not many people eating when you arrive. It's not the first time you eat there, it's a nice and cozy place so you come by when you're needing a little bit of peace.

“Y/N?” You hear a familiar voice calling you, making you turn around to find Lia. She's smiling, there's a man accompanying her. “It's been a while”, she says after telling the man to look for a place for them to sit.

“Hey, yeah it does”, you smile politely. Lia can see the huge eyebags you have and the wide eyes your friend has looking at her.

“Are you alright?” She asks, noticing you barely touched your food.

“Yeah”, you lie, “what about you?” You ask, eyeing the guy who's now looking at his phone while waiting for Lia.

“I'm okay”, she smiles shyly, “it's not easy, you know? But I'm trying to move on, meet new people”

You frown, not really understanding what she's talking about.

“I hope we can still be on friendly terms even though Jisung and I are over”, Lia says, regrets immediately when she sees your eyes widen. He didn't tell you. Shit.

“I didn't know you guys were not together anymore”, Hannah is the one to talk, stealing Lia's attention from your shocked face.

“Yeah, hm, it's been a while actually. I thought he would have already told you everything by now”, she says apologetically. “Well, Han Jisung, let's say that now we are even”, she thinks.

“I should probably go!” Lia points out to the man who's staring impatiently. She waves goodbye to you and walks towards him, afraid she'll tell you something more she's not supposed to.

You find yourself in the dark, seated at the sofa, arms crossed in front of your chest. You can't believe you had to hear from someone other than Jisung about his relationship status. You're mad at him, you were making an effort so things could go back to the way they were so why isn't he acting like he wants that too?

Before, he would tell you everything about his romantic endeavors and even though it hurted, you felt special, knowing every little thing about him. Now, you feel like you know nothing, he's spending less time with you and every time you try doing anything just the two of you, he avoids it like you would jump his bones or something if you stay alone with him for more than two hours.

You may have not gotten over him completely, but you're fine now and for years you could behave yourself, so you're not sure why he's acting like that.

You hear the door being open, Han’s voice comes out in a discussion, he's on the phone. He walks in, putting his phone in his pocket while trying to find his way in the dark. He jumps at the sight of you on the sofa, staring at him with a scowl.

“Jesus christ, y/n”, he says, putting his hand above his heart, “what the hell are you doing there in the dark?”

He turns on the light, turning back at you. You're still staring at him in silence.

“Why didn't you tell me you and Lia are not together anymore?” You stand up, waiting for his answer.

“W-what?” His standing falters and he takes a step back. “How did you know?”

“Clearly I didn't find out from my best friend”, you scoff. “Did you think I would try making a move on you if you are single?”

Jisung frowns, how the hell did you get to that conclusion?

“No, I-”

“I'm sure you already figured Jeongho and I broke up”, you point out, “but you rejected me, I'm over that already”

“I can see why you would think that”, Jisung says carefully, “considering the way I acted when you confessed, but it's not that, I can assure you”

“I'm trying to have a normal relationship with you, you know, but you're just not the same. You don't spend time with me anymore, you don't talk to me about what's on your mind, the only thing I can think is that you're scared of me”

“I'm sorry I made you feel that way, I'm trying to act normally too, it's just-” Jisung cuts himself off, not sure what to say. At the same time he doesn't know what to say to make you stop thinking like that, he's not sure things will get any better if he tells you the truth.

“What's it? Just tell me so I can fix it, please I-”

“I'm in love with you”, he blurts out, hand instantly going to his chest and clenching the place above his heart. “I'm so in love with you it hurts”

You stumble back, almost falling. Did you hear it right?

“I don't think I understand”, you say, frowning, trying to make sense of his words.

“I feel terrible, I rejected you and made you suffer just for me to feel like this now?” He scoffs, “I'm sorry I made you think you are the problem again, but you're not, I am. I'm the one who can't stay close to you because I'm afraid I'll do something that will ruin our friendship”

You get up, trying to function properly after this sudden confession. Never, in your wildest dreams did you think there would come a day when Jisung would actually love you in the way you most desperately once wanted. You fantasized about it for years but you never really thought it would happen for real.

“I can't do this right now”, you say to him, seeing his shoulders slump. The sad look in your face is what he most feared. Jisung didn't expect you to still like him, but it would be a lie to say he didn't have any hope of you telling him he still has a chance.

“I don't expect you to like me back”, he says, voice cracking a bit when he tries to say the words he least want to, “I just don't want you to think I'm avoiding you because of you, it's because of me”

You nod slowly, still not fully recovered from the shock. You walk past him, not saying anything anymore, just entering your room and closing the door silently. This was definitely unexpected.

A/N: If you like what I write please reblog or let me know in the comments, feedback give me motivation to keep writing. Also, you can buy me a coffee.

Taglist(closed):

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youunravelme · 1 year

Text

to all the girls you've loved before part 1

author's note: hi! remember that time i wrote jack fics? well i'm branching out, so BUCKLE UP BABY. it should be said that this will be multiple parts, i don't know how many though so again, buckle up. also i'm pretending the trade never happened

pairing: single dad!mat barzal x reader

summary: being a nanny for rich people was probably the worst thing that ever happened to you, until you started working for mat.

warnings: children, rich people, mentions of absent parent

mat barzal. nearly everyone in new york was obsessed with him, you knew him by the awkward elevator interactions when you were leaving work and he was getting home.

you nannied for a family in his building, a mom named erin who was rarely home with two really sweet children, ages 2 and 4.

you didn't even know his name until a few weeks after he moved in when erin mentioned his name in passing conversation, saying something about an nhl player living across the hall.

"i think he's around your age," she said with a sly smirk. "and handsome too, introduced himself to the kids too. such a sweetheart."

"erin," you started. "you can't possibly know he's a sweetheart from one two second interaction."

she tsked and waved you off. "first impressions have a great impact."

you met him when you were getting off the elevator. he had a duffle bag slung over one shoulder and wore a suit, his hair was wet and strewn about in every direction. you were in a pair of sweats to combat the cold.

he mumbled a small hey and made a pathetic excuse for a smile as he waited for you to get off the elevator.

everything you knew about him, you gleaned involuntarily. he must suck at cooking given the amount of times the smoke detector would go off in his place, you could hear the beeping through the walls. and his lack of cooking skills took shape in the trash bags filled with take out boxes that he loudly dumped in the trash chute. you even knew he had a best friend named "tito" from the shouting that erupted every time said friend came over.

you thought nothing of him aside from the mild annoyance at his loud noises.

it wasn't until the fall came and the two year old turned three (and therefore went off to preschool) that things changed.

you'd just settled into your pajamas when erin called asking you to come over.

"is everything alright?" you asked.

"you remember mat?"

"hardly."

she laughed through the phone, though it sounded a little strained. "can you come over? he's found himself in a bit of a situation."

you paused. "what kind of situation?"

spoiler alert: it was an eight month old baby girl kind of situation.

mat was sitting on erin's couch while the baby, whose name was apparently ella, snoozed away in the pack and play when you walked in.

erin explained the situation as you took a seat. something about a fling he had that resulted in a pregnancy (obviously) and the mom decided parenting just wasn't for her so she dropped the baby off with mat and has blocked him on all forms of communication.

erin leant some things like a pack and play for ella to sleep in until he got a crib. but he didn't need that as much as he needed you.

a nanny.

"i know you already have a job, but i can pay well and pay you more for watching all three kids when you have them," mat begged. "i know i have late games so it would require late nights but you can sleep in the guest room if you'd like and i might be gone for a week at a time, but you can invite friends over to hang out and--"

you held up a hand. listening to the man beg and plead for your help was almost heartbreaking. "i'll do it."

he sat back. "what, really?"

you furrowed your brows. "is that a problem?"

mat shook his head. "no! sorry, i was just surprised you'd agree so quickly.

"well, it's not like it would interfere with my time with erin's girls. i could watch your baby during the day and take her to pick up the girls from school and keep ella until you get back."

he still looked unsure. "i work late nights sometimes, is that a problem?"

you thought about the fact your schedule has been empty for the past few months, that the only reason you leave your shitty apartment was because erin needed you to nanny. "i think i can manage."

he smiled for the first time that evening, looking almost near tears. "thank you thank you thank you," he said.

you nodded, a little overwhelmed by his sudden change in demeanor. "when do i start?"

day one

you hesitantly walked into mat's big ass apartment to the sound of a screaming baby.

it was six in the morning.

mat ran into the living room, hair askew, clothes wrinkled, but his baby was in a clean set of pajamas with tears running down her face.

"i don't know what's wrong," he said frantically. "she woke up and i changed her diaper but she's still crying."

you dropped your bag on the floor and made your way over to him, taking ella out of his arms and immediately bouncing her in your own. "she's probably hungry," you guessed.

"i tried that! i put the bottle in the microwave but when i gave it to her she started crying harder and--"

"wait," you stopped him. "you put the bottle in the microwave?" he nodded. "with the formula?" he nodded again. "mat, you can't do that. heat the water separately and then add the formula. and then test it on your wrist to make sure it's the right temperature." you walked into the kitchen and prepared the bottle the right way, showing mat how to do it as you went.

when all was said and done, you placed the new bottle in ella's mouth and watched as she took it without issue.

mat's shoulders sagged in relief. "you're a miracle worker."

you gave him a sheepish smile. "you can go get ready, mat. i've got her from here." he nodded and hurried towards what you assumed was his bedroom while you walked over to the couch to sit down.

ella was a cute baby, you'd give her that. no doubt taking after her father. she looked at you with wide eyes as she drank her bottle, her irises never left your face. it would've been unnerving if she had been an adult.

mat came out a little less frazzled ten minutes later. ella had finished her bottle at that point and the both of you were laid on the floor doing tummy time.

"what's that?" he pointed to the two of you once he stopped running his hands through his hair.

"what's what?"

"what's that you're doing?" he gestured again before placing his hands on his hips.

"tummy time," you smiled. "it helps build her neck muscles. also helps prevent flat spots on the back of her head."

you didn't like to judge people for their skin color, because it's racist, but you didn't think it was possible for mat to be paler until you spoke.

"she could get flat spots?"

you hung your head as ella babbled to herself.

it was going to be a long employment.

day ten

you'd finally gotten mat on a rhythm, he looked a little less scared with every day that you came over.

but today was different.

he was going on an eight day roadie which meant you would be watching her overnight several nights in a row (on top of erin's kids).

you'd done much harder jobs before, so you weren't nervous about the time you spent with ella, it was more so you feared all the confidence you built in the week or so you'd worked for mat would disappear when he came back and realized he had an eighteen year commitment waiting at home for him.

"you have my number, right?" he asked even though you got it the night you accepted the position.

"yes, mat," you said instead.

"and you'll text me if anything goes wrong?"

you nodded. you bounced ella on your hip and held her hand up. "bye dada," you said for her, smiling as she did.

mat's bags were stationed by the front door, but he made no move towards them. he stayed planted in front of you, but his hands fidgeted.

"can i--" he cleared his throat. "can i hold her?"

"of course!" you didn't hesitate to pass her off to mat, who handled her like precious cargo, but was still a little unsure about the entire situation.

once she was settled, he took his eyes off her to look at you. "you know where the guest room is, right?" you nodded. "right, just make yourself at home. i stocked the fridge, i have just about every streaming service, so you should be fine." he paused. "but if you aren't--"

"mat--"

"--you can just text me if you need anything, alright?" he turned his head to focus on ella who took her hands to slap to his cheeks. "and you be good, okay baby?" his voice pitched higher right before he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

you checked your watch to keep yourself from intruding on what felt like a special moment. "mat," you started. "you should get going before you're late."

he nodded and pressed one last kiss to the top of ella's head before passing her back to you. "i'll facetime you when i get to the hotel, okay? so i can tell her goodnight?"

you nodded and left out the part that she would probably be asleep because honestly, you weren't expecting him to remember.

"alright," he said, wiping his hands on his pants before making his way to the front door where his bags sat. "i'll see you in a week."

"bye bye dada," you said in a high squeaky voice, using ella's hand to wave just like before.

he smiled before walking out the door and locking it behind him.

day fourteen

it wasn't until halfway through mat's roadie that weariness settled in. you were constantly surrounded by children, which normally wouldn't be an issue, but between ella and erin's two kids, you were practically a full time single parent.

which sucked because it wasn't even like you got laid to even create this issue.

mat, though, true to his word, facetimed every night he possibly could. he smiled wide every time he saw ella's face and while she was confused at how your phone worked, ella smiled and laughed at the sound of her father's voice.

"what have you been up to?" he asked one evening. you were spoon feeding ella sweet potato puree for dinner while he was laying in bed in his hotel room.

"nothing really, we went to the park today, she was really happy to see a few dogs."

mat grumbled. "certainly didn't get that from me."

you couldn't help it, you smiled at his pout.

"is that--" he guffawed. "did i make you smile?"

you rolled your eyes. "i'm sure i've smiled at you before."

"you haven't!"

"and i don't blame you!" another voice piped in. "he's not funny."

when mat saw the look on your face, he sighed. "that's tito," he said like that explained everything.

"nice to meet you, tito!" you called.

"is that your nanny?" you heard him call. "can i say hi to ella?"

mat rolled his eyes but moved the camera to show you a good looking man lounging in the other bed. he was handsome in a way that mat wasn't. you couldn't really compare one to the other in the same way you couldn't compare an apple to quantum physics.

"ella can you say hi?" you asked in a small voice. ella spared a single glance to camera before screaming. you laughed before spoon feeding her more puree. "sorry," you started. "she does that sometimes."

tito looked terrified but covered it up quickly when mat cleared his throat. "she just screams randomly?"

you shrugged. "usually when she's excited or frustrated."

tito laid back in his bed and started scrolling on his phone. "babies, man."

mat came back into view. his head rested back on his pillow as he held the camera above his face. "are you both doing okay?"

you opened your mouth to reply but tito cut him off.

"you don't need to ask her that everyday!" he said.

you couldn't see what he did, but judging by the shaking of the camera and the cackle that escaped tito's lips, you'd give your left leg and say he flipped his best friend off.

you took your eyes off the camera to look at ella who was using her puree covered hands to rub at her eyes. you put your phone down and grabbed a napkin to immediately start wiping her face and hands.

"is everything okay?" mat asked. "did i lose you?"

"just had to put the phone down to clean her up. she's getting sleepy." you pulled ella out of her high chair, resolving to clean it up later, and picked your phone up.

mat's face lit back up when ella came into view. "hi baby girl," he smiled. "are you getting ready to go to bed?"

ella rested her head on your shoulder and yawned.

"well, i'll let you two go," mat sighed. "i love you, ella bean." he directed his gaze to you. "same time tomorrow?"

"i'll let you know if anything changes."

"night."

"night, mat."

he ended the call and left you to take ella to bed.

day twenty-seven

nearly a month into working for mat and everything was going great. ella had gotten used to you which meant she knew you would come back when you left the room. the first two weeks, she cried every time you left. and if you had to guess, it probably had something to do with how her mother treated her.

and mat, well, he was embracing the father role well enough for someone who thought he was an unattached bachelor not even a month ago.

as far as you go, you were still getting used to the workload of erin's kids and ella. and while you would never breathe a word of it to anyone, you preferred ella over erin's kids.

your roommate and your boyfriend took some time to adjust to your new hours, but your roommate was excited when you contributed more to groceries and apartment needs. as far as your boyfriend went, he was still getting used to the idea of you being gone all day and sometimes even weekends, but even he admitted ella was the cutest baby he'd ever seen.

you were plating yogurt and some smashed peaches for her morning snack while holding her on your hip when mat walked in the kitchen, hair wet from a shower.

"hey," he said. "how is she?"

at the sound of his voice, ella turned in your arms and made a grabby motion for him. "you tell me," you said, handing her off to him. almost immediately, ella rested her head in the crook of his neck and popped a thumb in her mouth.

a smile crossed his face at the way ella fit so perfectly into the lines of his body.

"you're good at this," you remarked.

he laughed. "i have no idea what i'm doing."

"does anyone?"

"you seem to have it figured out."

the laugh was out of your mouth before you could stop it. "well then, let me go audition for broadway. i'm a better actress than i thought."

neither of you said a word, but you continued to stare at each other until his phone dinged. mat shifted ella around until he could fish his phone out of his pocket. "oh it's my mom." he scrolled through the texts when a figurative lightbulb appeared over his head.

"what?" you asked.

"my family is coming into town to meet ella next week so that might affect the hours you have." a flash of panic must've been present on your face because he quickly spoke again. "but your pay will still be the same! i don't want you to worry about that at all. i might still need you throughout the week."

"okay!" you smiled before moving ella's morning snack to her high chair. mat peeled her off of him and placed her in the seat before taking the chair next to hers.

his phone dinged again.

"oh," he said.

"what is it?"

"my mom wants to meet you."

"oh."

#mat barzal #mat barzal imagine #mat barzal x reader #nhl imagine #nhl imagines #nhl blurb

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alavestineneas · 9 months

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Glass and mirrors

pairing: young!coriolanussnow x fem!reader summary: There is one thing the world needs to know about her: she didn't become a star overnight. She was born to be one. warnings: canon-typical violence, mentions of mental illness, narcissism, blonde men who need therapy, unhinged women, people in shitty relationships and toxic industries word count: 4.6k PART TWO IS HERE

author's note: Hello and welcome to our small community of people who have fallen victim to the charming (and evil) blonde man! This fic is heavily inspired by the edits of models that pop up on my ticktock feed every day. Shout out to them and the talented editors who bless my eyes with their creations. As for YN this time, prepare to be on quite a ride because she, surprise-surprise, is evil! In my head, there has to be at least one victor who feels no remorse at all; they can't all be morally good (and relatively sane) people. Also, the obsession with beauty in this fic is, in fact, intentional, so bear with me. Feel free to comment or insult the author in the comments, but only if you are creative with it. Enjoy and see you in part 2!

In all of her short childhood, she always loved mirrors. Her grandma used to joke about it with her old friends while they shared lunch at the factory: ''That empty-headed child wants to do nothing but stare at herself all day.'' The women would laugh, their raspy voices making the glid, already filled with toxic fumes to the brim, hotter. YN didn't mind; she would pretend not to hear them, clinging to the machinery in front of her instead. She would get out of here sooner or later, and she'd see whose laughter would be left echoing all through the narrow streets.

She wasn't born to rot in this place like these people were; YN was sure of that. Not with a face like hers, with manners she taught herself from the bright magic box in their cramped commune apartment, where a few times a year the government played the show. It was supposed to be a punishment, YN reminded herself each time, but it didn't look like one. She watched the children eat more food than she had seen in a month and then cry on the stage in front of millions. She wouldn't cry if she was there, that was for certain. People die every day here, but none of them get to dress up in the jewels provided by the wealthiest people she has ever seen.

It was funny how they had all the money in the world and still chose to dress so horribly. Mismatched fabrics and smudged colours on their faces, like the colours of the lake near her house—the factories polluted it with dyes, turning the water green, purple, and sometimes even pink. That's how she got her old grey dress to be such a pretty lavender colour. It didn't matter that everyone at school laughed at her, even Miss Kyla; she was horrendously ugly anyway, her hair resembling the colour of unwashed underwear. YN wore her dress with pride, mimicking the voice of the funny multicolour-haired man on the screen, chatting with long o's and a's.

That's how she ended up here, on the first floor of the newly renovated training centre, with a drink in her freshly manicured hand. She had two hours before her stylists would need her again—a time designated for sleep, which she apparently so greatly lacks. YN doesn't care; she went without sleep for much longer than two days. Instead, she does what she loves the most—turns on a shiny screen and watches the golden letters appear: the 15th Annual Hunger Games.

It starts with reaping, as always, but YN skips that part—she doesn't like seeing herself in those dirty rags, although, as papers would later state, ''nothing could make this girl ugly, even if a potato sack was put on her body.'' She likes interviews better. Luckily, the wait is not very long; soon enough, her favourite host pops up, his hair shimmering with sea green.

''And now, our dear viewers, I am more than pleased to announce our next tribute from District 1—please let her hear how excited we are to meet her!'' His voice booms through the theatre as the crowd erupts into applause.

YN moves gracefully, a beaming smile on her face matching that of a host. Her gloved hands wave at the supposed people in front of her as if they were guests at her birthday party. But most importantly, dress. The one she chose herself, arguing over it with her stylist for the last few hours, the one that fitted her perfectly. Capitol enough to appeal to the audience, district enough to highlight that she isn't one of them—she is something new, undiscovered, and worth keeping an eye on. It's almost not a dress at all—the sparkling, sheer fabric of beautiful white, with stars gathering at her chest and bottom to finish the ''almost naked'' look. And the crowd goes crazy for it. People shout, and the splashes of the cameras blinding her create a new melody that is so unfamiliar to YN's ears. Admiration. The thing she craved for so long.

''Alright, alright,'' Lucky Flickerman smiles, gesturing for the crowd to settle down. ''We don't want to scare her off now, do we?'' He turns to her, a microphone in hand. ''What's your name, sweetheart?''

''YN Y/L/N. And I am afraid you can't scare me off, no matter how hard you try. The thing is, I am here to stay,'' she jokes, cocking an eyebrow at the man beside her.

''Oh, how I love your confidence! Now tell me—we heard you are a volunteer—the first in the history of District 1! Are there any special ties to the girl who was supposed to stand here tonight, or what's going on?''

''Well, I was dying to see you in person, of course—no pun intended.''

Oh, there weren't any ties to the girl, or the boy, for that matter. No, YN simply wanted to go at her peak chance of winning—countless years of secret preparation in the factory; working a night shift after school and full days of weekends; hours of studying every plant and animal known to mankind—all to ensure that she wouldn't waste her chance like most kids here did.

''That's an honour coming from your lips; we are happy to see you in the Capitol, Miss Y/L/N. Since you came here by choice, what strategy are you planning on using in the arena? Maybe something tied to your district's craft?''

''If you promise to keep this between us, I'll confess—I will use my charms to make everyone fall in love with me and watch them fight by promising the winner a kiss—and then I will take it from there.'' YN turns to face the lights, staring directly into the camera for a few seconds. The crowd laughs once more, some going so far as to cheer and whistle in excitement. ''But in all honesty, I think I have a fair shot—I would win in a day if it meant the unlimited supply of those amazing cupcakes with sprinkles on top.''

''Well, in that case, you should definitely get a good rest this night—you are not the only one who got your eye on them! Ladies and gentlemen, prepare for the Cupcake Games tomorrow, and don't forget to sponsor this lovely girl right here if you want to see her win! And now, a short word from our sponsors.''

Cupcake jokes are still funny to her, even after two years, although she got sick of them a week after her victory and was just as sick of all the titles papers came up with to fit her into the candy girl box. It served her well, for which she is grateful; the sponsors did send her a shitton of things, although mostly useless.

Next is the introduction of everyone else; YN doesn't care to look at it for more than just a few seconds, speeding it up to maximum. It's boring to no end—how do Capitolees watch it every year with such excitement? She stops to look only when her face appears on the screen, covered in crimson blood.

She counted six canons when she finally stopped to take a breath in and look at her surroundings. That was about right, although YN didn't count how many times she pulled a knife out of somebody's still-warm body and lurched into another nearby. The sand soaked up the blood fast, she noticed, stepping over the pile of what used to be her competitors and walking towards the cone-shaped something. Nobody in sight—each one of the ''better'' kids is now dead without a chance to kill each other, to kill her, and ''others'' will die like flies under the hot sun of what looked like a desert. YN noticed that some even left behind the given jackets; she collected them before stepping into the Cornucopia, claiming them as her own. Not everyone grew up in hot factories, she thought to herself, so they have no chance of knowing how cold it gets at night.

YN doesn't like how the uniform looks on her; the T-shirt hangs around her frame too loosely. It's evident that she didn't eat enough back then, but it was tolerable. The dried blood looked worse; with her stoic face and eye colour, the streams looked too grotesque, almost unserious; it didn't fit the look she was going for. Her hands itch to wipe it before YN remembers that it's non-existent now—the girl on the screen is just a recording. She forwards a little more, looking for the commentary of the first night from the hosts—their excitement and praise never get old—but hears knocking at her door just as she is about to press play. YN glances at the clock—it's too early for the prep team, so it must be someone else—and turns off the TV just to be sure she heard it right.

When the knocking continues, she shouts a quick ''Come in,'' after checking her reflection on the now dark screen. ''Ah, Maggie!''

''How many times do I have to repeat that my name is Mags, not Maggie? Not Mags with fangs either, to be clear. Just Mags.''

''But everyone calls you that! And I want to be special,'' YN whines, laying back on the sofa.

It's Mags. YN likes Mags. Mags is the only girl besides her on the victors' list. Mags is the one who is always down to eat lunch together or to watch the new collection in the magazines. She is funny and down to earth, and, most importantly, Mags doesn't take bullshit from anyone.

''Even more special?'' Mags smiles, opening the fridge to look for something edible. There isn't much; they both know that YN would never eat something to ruin her figure. ''I saw your photoshoot on the street today. It's beautiful.''

''Thank you,'' YN smiles. She doesn't remember which one of her campaigns was supposed to air today, but it doesn't matter. ''Are you here for the promo again?''

The curly-haired woman nods, not looking up from the shelves. ''I hate it. I wish they would just leave me alone, so I can go home and forget about all of this.''

YN is always weirded out by such comments from Victor from 4 but never says anything. Not everyone was born to be in front of the camera; if that were the case, her talent wouldn't be so special anymore. ''It's our job, Maggie. They'll never leave us alone.''

''I know.'' Mags sighed, planting her body on the sofa beside her.

They are different, but YN thinks it's better that way. They are the same age, both 20, and that's about the only thing that ties them together. YN watches as her friend's chest rises and falls as she stares at the ceiling, her long, curly hair in some type of twist. YN would never style it like that, but Mags doesn't ask, so she stares at her in silence, trying her hardest not to compare them. She knows what type of conclusion will sparkle in her brain, but she doesn't want to admit it. Mags is her friend, her only good friend, so something inside YN fights hard to leave her alone. It's an unusual feeling, almost foreign, but YN wants to make an exception. She thinks Maggie deserves it.

''Are you okay?'' the woman asks her, finally snapping out of her trance. ''You are less talkative than usual.''

''Oh, yeah—just a little tired from work, that's it.''

Work. It's not the type of work people can really get tired from, and if anybody thinks otherwise, they never worked a day in District 1. Sometimes, YN can still feel the burning cloud of steam hitting her face when she closes her eyes. The work she does in Capitol is child's play—photoshoots, interviews, promotional campaigns, and runways. She is the only one with this kind of hectic schedule, the only one who is interesting enough for the general public to want to see her everywhere they go. Multiple shows a day wasn't uncommon; photoshoots until five a.m. were basically her usual routine; she did so many of them that she never remembered the brand name for more than an hour.

''Well, I hope I don't interrupt your me-time,'' Mags notes. ''Panem knows you need it. ''

''You worry too much about me. Better tell me about how life is in 4—anything new?''

There is probably nothing exciting, but it feels nice to listen to somebody talk with such love for their home as Mags does. It's also a great opportunity. YN catches every subtle expression and every movement of her friend with attentive eyes, making sure to parrot them later. She noticed from the recording today that her speech misses a certain effortlessness.

Curl and twist, curl and twist—YN has learned the pattern by now, sitting in front of the gigantic mirror, surrounded by a team of stylists. Hair, make-up, nails, and toes—five people work hand in hand for her to appear for two minutes on the long podium. The backstage is loud, and a lot is going on—last-minute changes, alterations, and quick touch-ups. YN doesn't bother to look around; she closes today like a face of the collection, and after she is done with this podium, the day is finally coming to an end.

''Oh, YN, darling, here you are!'' The bald man in his forties appears on the horizon of her peripheral vision, clasping his unnaturally white hands together. ''How are you doing, my little star? Anything you need?''

She is irritated to no end; her team booked seven shows for her today; she hadn't had anything to eat in the past six hours; and the loud music makes her head throb. But she doesn't voice any of that—nobody really wants to know how she is feeling.

Just like she guessed, the man doesn't wait for her response. ''There have been some changes in the order today, sweetheart. Jenovia will be closing today, and you will walk in her dress instead,'' the man says, turning to face her styling team. ''Change the hair to fit, and take off the blue in her make-up—it won't match. Good luck!''

''Do what he says,'' YN announces, her mouth twitching just a little. She is furious. To have that blonde bitch Jenovia walk in the best dress of the collection YN inspired? Over her dead body. Or, should she say, over Jenovia's? She will figure it out but do so later. Now there are only four girls before her, so she needs to be ready.

''Three, two, one! Go, go!'' the stage coordinator shouts, opening the curtain for her.

Right and left, hip and hand, followed by the strong clicking of her five-inch heels. The music is even louder here, with the beets vibrating through the runway and pouring into her bloodstream. She doesn't pay any attention to the glass floor underneath her. Surprisingly, her training before games helped her model more than one could guess. YN doesn't see anyone but the blinding lights lining the podium—not that she needs to see the hungry faces of the spectators. It doesn't matter what piece of fabric covers her body; they are looking at who wears it. Final pose at the centre—no smile is her go-to. Hold and turn is the golden rule.

''Here you are!'' One of the seamstresses grabs her hand, pulling her into a small, curtained space with countless clothes on racks. ''Calio wants you to hold a purse for the backstage photo and lose the belt. Where the fuck is the golden belt?'' she shouts, searching for one. ''Wait here; I'll go find it,'' she finally announces, running away before YN has the chance to suggest anything.

YN looks around, carefully moving the laying rags with her foot. She mentally goes over the outfits labelled with names, rating them one by one, until her eyes stop on the white dress. The closing dress, the one she was supposed to model. Underneath it are velvety black high boots.

The idea comes to her mind quickly: she steals a needle from the nearby table and carefully places it inside the shoes, making sure it looks like an accident.

''Finally,'' the woman returns with a belt in her hands, oblivious to YN's half-smile. ''Put it on and go; they are already waiting.''

''Of course, thanks.''

YN isn't sure how much time has passed before she hears a scream, standing up from her place in the corner with a blanket around her exposed shoulders. Surely enough, Jenovia is on the floor, crying crocodile tears—a needle inside her heel deep enough to make a few of the girls around her gag.

''What the fuck happened?'' It's Calio, the boss here; he was ordering her around before.

''I don't know,'' all the blonde girl can manage before bursting into tears one more time.

''Well, can you walk?'' he asks, kneeling to take a look.

''No,'' Jenovia whispers, her hand holding her bloodied foot.

The bald man sighed, more annoyed than concerned. ''We need a replacement. You,'' he points at YN. ''Take it off and change into the dress. Quick!''

YN does what she is told in no time; she doesn't want to wait until Jenovia suddenly gets better or the man finds a better-suited girl to close. After a few minutes, she is almost ready; she only needs the lipstick to finish it off.

''We don't have time!'' the man roars, dragging her to the exit. ''Here!'' He puffs out her hair and adjusts the layers of fake pearls covering her neck. ''Three, two, one! Go, fucking go!''

And go she does. A few steps on the runway, and she discovers that lipstick is still in her hands. YN puts it in the pocket of the enormously large black coat that hides the gorgeous white dress underneath. Step after step, her long black boots draw patterns on the glass. She will have no choice but to buy them; YN doesn't care if it's stupid. They helped her, so she will have them.

It's time for the final pose: YN takes out the lipstick from her pocket and applies it with two swift motions, blowing a kiss to the camera. It will definitely be a hit with the photographers. YN throws one last look before turning around and returning to the curtained exit. On her way back, when the lights lower to follow her back, she can see a little clearer. In the sea of vibrant hair colours and clothes, the platinum-blonde hair and a simple black suit stood out too much not to notice. There is only one person who could afford to look so simple—YN knows it. An opportunity of a lifetime.

She makes another stop in the middle of the podium, right in front of his seat. The coat slides off her shoulders effortlessly, and YN catches it just when the fabric is about to hit the floor. The crowd goes crazy, clapping and whistling at her tricks, but YN has no wish to entertain them any further. YN pauses for a moment, her eyes meeting icy-blue ones, before turning away and finishing the show. There is one thing the world needs to know about her: she didn't become a star overnight. She was born to be one.

Since the last show, she has done fifteen more—day after day, opening and closing. Her little trick got her where she wanted to be, with more money than one person could need in a lifetime and nowhere to spend it. Even now, standing in the long hallway of the training centre, she wears nothing she bought herself; all are gifted, sent, or handed by the adoring fans. Like a rag doll, with no say in how she looks or what she does, YN hears everyone say that it was ''a price of fame''. She doesn't think so; she was told what to do long before she tasted real butter on her toast.

The sliding door to her apartment moves almost without noise. While most victors complain that the lock system reminds them of prison, YN is grateful to have it. The thought of some crazy fanatic waiting for her in the dark isn't the most pleasant one. The designer bag finds its place on the floor, soon joined by the coat—room service will clean it up later. The heels slide off her feet quickly, leaving bloodied marks on her skin, but YN doesn't care enough to do something about them.

''Forgive me for joining you without an invitation.''

YN turns around, her hands grabbing the keys in her hands tighter. She mentally goes over her means of escape or fight—a mirror could easily be broken and used as a weapon; if necessary, she could also grab a nearby ottoman. The man in the chair doesn't look too impressed with her thought process. His lips curve into a smile, blue eyes staring at her with undivided attention. A suit, not very different from the one he wore at her show, was a deep brown colour.

''Mister President,'' YN breathes out, lowering her hand.

Coriolanus Snow. Light, almost white hair frames his face like a halo, with his suit hugging his waist just enough to highlight the broad shoulders. YN saw him on TV a couple of times, but seeing him in person was something entirely different. It's like the air shifts around him and changes with his presence.

''I believe we met before,'' he humours her, his eyes shining with mischief.

The light knocking on the door doesn't leave YN any time to answer. She presses a button near it, fixing her hair before opening it. YN tries to look as composed as possible without betraying her nerves—why was he here? ''Yes?''

''The dinner, Ma'am.'' the room service declares, pushing a cart in front of her.

YN nods, even though she didn't order one. ''Leave it here,'' she says, gesturing to the place nearby. When the door closes and she is alone with the man in her room again, her heart skips a beat.

''I took the liberty of ordering; I hope you don't mind.''

Even if she did, she knew better than to say anything. Instead, YN watched as the man stood up and took the dishes from the cart, placing them on the coffee table, before turning to her once more.

''Please, have a seat.''

She does what she is told, sitting down on her king-sized bed—the chair is already taken by him—and waits for the blonde man to start speaking. He doesn't right away, choosing to pour a glass of wine for her and himself.

YN watches the dark liquor pour into the glass, swirling with each drop. She isn't hungry—she rarely was—and the soup he ordered looks more like vomit than a dish, but she still takes the spoon and carefully places it into her mouth. Her lipstick stains the silverware with colour, leaving a small circle right at the end—that's when the man finally decides to speak.

''Dare I say I am a huge fan of your work ethic? Everyone who I've spoken to is very satisfied with your,'' he pauses, searching for the fitting word, ''dedication .''

''Thank you, Mister President,'' YN replies with a polite smile before returning to her soup. She watches him only from the corner of her eye. The way he cuts his steak with his ringed fingers and the way he places a small bite in his mouth before his lips close. There is a subtle roughness in his movements, a power play of some sort.

He catches her gaze and, for a moment, is silent. ''You probably wonder why I am here in the first place, outside of the amazing steak they cook here, of course. The thing is, Miss Y/L/N, that you are popular not only with the general public but with people higher in power as well. One may even say they fell in love with the way you present yourself.''

''I am pleased to know that, Mr. President, but I am only doing my job as a victor.''

''Then you will understand the weight of my dilemma. Those people who have served Panem all their lives faithfully usually don't ask for much recognition; they work because they want to build a better future for all of us. So, when they do ask for a small favour or two, I am more than happy to satisfy them. But recently, all they ask for is you .''

''I believe I don't quite understand. They want to meet me?''

''You can phrase it like that, yes. For a night or two, of course, with all expenses covered.''

It's heavy, the understanding of what Mister President really implies. The thought of someone's hand roaming her body brings her dinner up YN's throat. ''Why?'' Her voice is shakier than she would like, but she is more focused on composing the rising anger than noticing it.

''I am sorry, Miss Y/L/N, but I am afraid there is nothing I can do; I am greatly outnumbered. Unless,'' he starts but doesn't finish his sentence.

''Unless what?''

''Unless you are seen with me.''

His piercing blue eyes look at her, but there is nothing in them. Her chances are limited, and he knows it. There is something rogue in him beneath the veil of chivalry he offers. YN smiles at him. That's what this whole charade was about—he wants her. Coriolanus Snow, the most powerful man in the whole world, wants her.

''Of course, Mr. President. That's very generous of you.''

''Mister President is too official, don't you think, Miss Y/L/N? Perhaps we could find a more informal way of addressing each other?''

''Informal?'' YN asks, tilting her head to the side. If he wants her, he'll get her. ''What about Mister Snow?'' The buttons on her shirt are easy to manage—a few quick motions, and it slides off her shoulders onto the cream cover. ''Or, Sir Coriolanus?'' The pants are a little trickier, but YN learned that backstage, every second counts, so they soon also pool around her heels, the fabric hitting the floor with a slight thud.

The blonde man watches her intently, his eyes following every move of her hands. His legs are still spread wide on the lime-green chair as he slightly leans back. YN can't tell if he is enjoying her antics or not, but frankly, she doesn't care; she is enjoying it. The way her shadow dances on the wall, the way the air shifts in the huge room, transforming it into a tiny stage. YN looks at him with mischief, with superiority, even. After all, she is the show here. Why not let Mr. Savior think it is for him?

''Come, Mister Snow,'' she says, throwing it in his face like a bone to the dog.

He doesn't have the haste to join her; on the contrary, he stands up painfully slowly. His tall figure almost seems to stretch as he raises, covering the floor lamp behind him fully. When he finally circles the table to stand above her, his presence is overwhelming. YN lets him stand between her legs, his unusually cold hand on her thigh.

''I prefer Coriolanus,'' he whispers in her ear, lowering himself enough to touch her ear with his velvety lips. He pulls away slightly, planting a kiss on her cheek instead. ''Have a most pleasant night, Miss Y/L/N.''

And then he walks away. YN watches as his figure disappears behind the sliding door before she lets out a breath she didn't realize she was holding. Her gaze instinctively finds her reflection in the nearby mirror; there is no reason to shine if no one watches her.

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calico-cheriies · 2 months

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WASTED SUMMERS |Manjiro Sano x Reader Fanfic|

{Chapter two}

{Masterlist}

{WASTED SUMMERS Masterlist}

"Confess I loved you, just thinking of you... I know I've loved you from the start..."

—————————————————

You already regretted being acquainted with the gang member, who you'd just found was the leader of one of the most powerful gangs! How could you have guessed that the insufferable airhead was the gang leader for crying out loud?!

Your face heating up in embarrassment when someone had confronted you about your relationship with him. Of course, there was many things to take from this; the first one being that your classmates were nosy, and the second being that the short childish boy was the leader of one of the most feared gangs. You couldn't believe you let the delinquent walk you home, and even worse- you confided personal things to him!

Though you had to admit that it was the most fun and relaxing time you've had in a long time- you really needed other people to talk to if that's how you felt about him- or rather around him.

You shook away the thoughts as you walked towards one of the classrooms, sliding open the door and greeting some of your fellow peers. You would often stay after school to participate in the student council meetings, ever since you were voted as the student president and confirmed valedictorian, you had made it a responsibility to address some changes and revisions of rules.

You had been anticipating this thing since the summer before this year- so you had really been on top of everything. "(Y/N)! Thank you for stopping by, we already made a rough draft," the salutatorian bowed his head before handing you some papers.

You scanned the papers and nodded, "These are fine... I will review and edit them before officially publishing them with the news club," you sent a smile to the boy, who visibly blushed but went unnoticed by you. Thus it begun your stay there for an hour and a half, but there was something that you couldn't help but feel a familiar warm feeling blossom in you. You had to admit that being around others that were like you was comforting.

Your salutatorian, whom was named Riku, had always competed with you since you were children, so you had a fun time sending teasing jabs to him and getting to know any new people that were new this year. That was before the sliding door swung open to reveal the last person you wanted to see.

Mikey.

You ignored the boy who casually walked in with his friend behind him, everyone in the room went quiet and even tensed up, Riku even slightly scooted away from you.

Harsh.

"Mikey, this room is specifically for the student council," you spoke up just as Mikey was about to speak. Intense (E/c) eyes looking up with a stern glare, it wasn't really aggressive but it was definitely a warning that it wasn't a good time. Many watched as Mikey leaned in close to your face, he clearly didn't care and it seemed like what you said didn't make it to his brain. "No need to be rude to your best friend, (Y/N)-Chan," he grinned, making sure to loudly announce the nickname he had given you.

Most kid's tensed up, it was considered rude to call someone on the student council such nicknames, especially from someone that had a bad reputation like Mikey. They were expecting to see you yell or even back down, but you did neither.

You had rolled your eyes and stood up, bowing to your classmates as an apology. "I'm sorry for his rudeness, I'll be right back," a light hue of pink on your cheeks, you didn't like the glances the students gave each other after Mikey's nickname for you came out and you grabbed Mikey by the collar and dragged him out, "Draken, you too." You simply stated as the two walked out, at least they didn't really fight you on it.

You closed the door, "You guys can't come in here and do what you want! You're scaring my peers away and you're making me look bad!" You crossed your arms, eyes glaring up at the two boys. Draken shrugged, "Sorry," he didn't even sound sincere!

You sighed and while shaking your head you asked the question, "Whatever, what did you need anyways?" you were confused as to why they wanted to see you, Mikey was quiet as he stared at you. It didn't seem like they would go out of their way for someone like you. It had been a few days since you last saw them, and you weren't even friends with them.

At least- that's what you assumed.

The three of them stood there in silence, so you kept tapping your foot impatiently before Mikey said anything, it was strange... he was looking down with a weird expression... did he feel ill or something? You didn't like his piercing gaze on you and it began to make you squirm under his intense stare. This was the first time you felt kind of afraid of his gaze, he sure could stare anyone to death...

You supposed you could see why people were afraid of him...

"Mikey... are you alright?" You were obviously concerned until Draken eventually shoved him aside, "Mikey wanted to invite you out with us, Takemichi and his girl were going to come with us and some other friends..." Draken revealed and that made you silent.

Suddenly you threw your head back a little bit and let out a quiet laugh, your lips curved into a smile as you shook your head. "That's thoughtful of you guys... I didn't think I was scary to approach," you had now understood- well to Mikey it was misunderstood but it didn't matter. "I appreciate the offer, but I have to stay, unfortunately," you bowed your head apologetically, it was kind of disappointing that you couldn't go but it was still your responsibility to take care of student problems and study. Plus- you weren't even sure if you were the right person to ask. You obviously weren't as laid back as Hina was and you didn't think you would be looked at as a fun person- but the gesture was enough of make your heart flutter.

"(Y/N)-Chan... you're so boring," of course that came from Mikey...

"Okay... thanks, Sano," a sigh escaped your lips, (e/c) eyes slowly traveling down so you wouldn't have to see his smug smile. Your fingers were messing with the hem of your uniform's sleeve. "I just have a lot of things to do... but maybe next time," you sent them a half smile, but then Riku peeked his head out of the classroom.

He seemed to slightly glare at Mikey, before turning to you with a smile, "(Y/N)... we just finished since it's getting late, do you want to walk home together?" he had already grabbed your bag and you hummed in response and turned your back to Mikey, not seeing his smile drop. "Huh?... oh sure-" you outstretched your hand, fingers grazing the strap of your messenger bag until Mikey beat you to it and grabbed it for you.

"(Y/N)-Chan... let's go home!" Mikey declared as Draken stared down the salutatorian, he was also a scary starer..."Whatever Mikey says, goes," he was intimidating the poor boy! You were stunned as Mikey dragged you by the hand towards the exit from Draken and the boy.

You wrinkled your face in annoyance which stopped you from walking causing the blonde to glance back, "Hm? Did you forget something?" he asked, clearly oblivious to what you were feeling. You pointed to the end of the hall where they just came from, "Mikey! You can't just scare someone like that... plus, I thought you were going out!" The words sputtered out of your mouth, cheeks heating up in embarrassment. You did make sure to note that you owed your classmate an apology... and maybe more to make up for the intrusion.

"(Y/N)-Chan... that boy is no good!" Mikey huffed out, continuing to pull you forward. "Plus... I wanna walk you home!" he childishly retorted, causing you to shake your head in annoyance again. "Sano... you just have to ask," you mumbled, already to exhausted to argue, not even sure why Mikey wanted to be around you so much. It's not like he had a life-changing conversation with you anyway... but a thought then popped into your head.

...He's going to be a pest to you for sure, he could always be following you around or always barging in during your free time to sit and talk to you. You enjoyed his company for now but there was one thing that was stopping you-

His delinquent lifestyle.

The walk home was a bit different than the last one, the last one had a much more relaxed and peaceful vibe to it. This one felt more... vulnerable and somewhat personal, you saw that Mikey had some kind of expression on his face, and you subconsciously gripped the strap of your messenger back tightly before deciding to ask the looming question. "Mikey..." you hadn't realized how your voice came out soft- almost like a whisper and you were afraid that he didn't hear it. You were prepared to feel embarrassed until the blonde turned his head slightly in your direction. "Hm?" His hum made your stomach feel nervous, and you weren't sure what it was.

"What are you thinking about?" You watched his face for any change, it seemed that he was good at hiding his emotions because he kept the same neutral smile plastered on his face.

It was getting dark while you waited for his response, the sun was setting and it painted this light orange hue over his face. You thought that the light made him seem more vulnerable, he didn't have a scowl or a glare like most delinquents did- he had a more childlike and sweet aura that just drew you more into him.

"Heh, I didn't take you for the kind to be nosy," his response was teasing, and it made you just let out a small snort, you weren't acting out like you had done so earlier or many times before, you had even accepted the teasing response because you felt compelled to show that you were actually worried- or rather curious as to what the delinquent was thinking in.

"I was thinking about something coming up..." was all he ended up saying, and it prompted you to already start thinking of what the boy could mean. Was it a birthday? No- it had to be something that was clearly meaningful to him. The next thing that came to mind was the fact that he was the leader of a gang, could be something related to that?

"Are you going to fight someone?" The words slipped out, but you really couldn't help but ask, your face becoming slightly flushed at the personal question. You begun to panicking now as he stopped in the middle of the side walk which prompted you to stopped next ton him but you couldn't really read his expression. "Ah- I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" you really were a stuttering mess, the confident aura slowly deteriorating as the tension became awkward, at least to you.

"(Y/n)-chan... you're so smart," he threw his head back in laughter, clearly enjoying seeing the uptight girl get flustered. "Glad that you came to that conclusion..." you muttered under your breath, not wanting to ruin the smile he had on his lips, it was a nice sight to see according to you- at least that's what you thought. You just ended up elbowing him gently, not wanting to push an answer out of him. "Just... be careful, it's my job as the top student of our class to look out for my peers," you grunted out, trying to find some reason to not worry over him or flatter him.

You both stood there for a few more minutes, the sounds of the cars driving by and the rustling of leaves was the only noise between the two. You hadn't realized you had been staring down at your shoes until Mikey flicked you on the forehead, causing your figure to flinch and cry out instinctively, "Hey!" Your hands flew up to rub the spot where he flicked you. Your eyes snapping up to meet his much darker ones. "You're too sweet, let's get you home nerd," his smile was pulled into his usual lazy one, causing a sigh from you and you continued the walk home.

"Thanks... for walking me home instead, Sano," you stood stopped in front of your house, now turning to face him. "It feels nicer to see you don't go around beating guys up, it feels safe," a snicker left you, enjoying the way his eyes lit up for a bit. "You just like having me around," he stuffed his hands into the pockets of his Toman jacket, his face turning to look at the details of your humble house. "Whatever, just get home safe you dork," you ended up gently shoving him. Now red face at how his childish response got you riled up. "Bye Mikey," you stepped back to signal him to leave with a wave.

Mikey had turned around to leave, his boots clicking against the concrete before he heard his name being shouted out. He had swung around thinking something had happened in the short amount of time. He couldn't imagine to his surprise that it was the (H/c) girl rushing at him, your phone in hand.

{Chapter three}

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#toman mikey #mikey #manjiro sano #manjiro #x reader #mikey x reader #Manjiro sano x reader #fluff

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ashwhowrites · 3 months

Note

so you know how in the future scientist think that Lesbians might be able to get a baby? Yeah can we do that with Robin pls? I wanna see how she’d be like as a mom

I'm going to do this as a headcanon, I hope that is alright

When Y/N first told Robin she wanted a child together, Robin panicked

She gulped and went silent...and Robin being silent scared Y/n to her core

Robin admitted she was scared of the idea and needed time to adjust to the idea

So she spent all her free time reading blogs online on how to be a mom and what it is like

A big thing was imagining your partner as a parent

Robin thought long and hard about Y/N being a mom, and Robin fell in love with the idea

She wanted to have breakfast together with a baby at the table, go to the park, take family photos, and have another version of Y/N to love

Once she said yes, the task to get Y/N pregnant began

Robin adored the pregnancy

The vision of Y/N with a bump and carrying their baby made Robin fall even more in love

Then their baby was born

A girl

Robin got even more excited. She believed she could be a great girl mom

And she was

Robin became a very involved mom

She went to every sports event

Cheering loudly from the sidelines

Getting in a few fights with other parents who didn't like her comments about their children

That is when Y/N steps in and apologies for Robin's sarcastic manners

Robin believes everyone is jealous that her daughter is the best

Bake sale at a school event? Robin volunteered herself and her wife

Which meant Y/N did the baking while Robin watched

Daddy-daughter dance? Robin stepped in and took the role

Robin didn't allow anyone to babysit...at first

Until Y/N begs for a date night and Robin can't say no to her wife

So Robin allows Steve and Steve only

But she spends half of date night texting and calling Steve as she panics about her daughter

No matter how old her daughter got- their bond was always strong

#robin buckley fanfic #robin buckley x reader #robin buckley #robin buckley x female reader #robin buckley x female reader fluff #robin buckley mom x mom reader #robin buckley request #robin buckley x reader fluff #ashwhowrites

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evilminji · 6 months

Text

My WIP fairy hates me. But like... in that homoerotic Nemesis sorta way, I swear.

Cease an desist, woman! (I scream into the void, knowing damn well she, being my own brain, SHAN'T.)

Cause NOW? Now I CAN NOT stop Pondering, with a Capitol P, the life of a Sentient Quirk. The trials and tribulations. The indignities and sufferings. Countless micro-aggression and out right dismissal of sentience. The reduction to the EXTENSION of another.

You are not a person.

You are JUST a Quirk.

An organ that "thinks" itself separate, in the way knees spasm when struck just so. The child you are attached to just needs to get better CONTROL of you. Your words and actions are actually THEIRS. You are simultaneously an unruly animal and strange adult, not allowed near other peoples children.

Why are you trying to follow this four year old into their school? Why are you SITTING out side a pre-school? Are you stalking that child?

You are a grown adult. Connected to a random Japanese child.

The child is expected to "control" you.

Punished if they do not.

No one is listen to EITHER of you, as you try to explain the situation. The child is upset, scared, and does not have the emotional maturity to understand why you are not to blame. All they can understand is that you appeared and everything became stressful and "bad". They started getting punished. Have to share their room now.

Do you even have rights? If you get hurt, get MAIMED, what will happen to you? Can you hold a job? Own land? Open a bank account? Fuck it! Can you have a RELATIONSHIP?

If you went out RIGHT NOW and punched a purse thief, would the FOUR YEAR OLD be arrested?

If the kid grows up, becomes a hero, and you do secretarial work... does his license cover you? If YOU wanted to become a Hero, would he be your hero partner? Could he technically sit in a corner and let you work?

If no one could TELL, over an internet connection, then surely that should prove SOMETHING? Right?

And! The question NO ONE ever seems to ask!

Could..... could you LEAVE? Do people have the right to force you back? If you don't WANT to be some kid's Quirk? You're sentient. If, unlike Dark Shadow, you are not PHYSICALLY connected, but tethered by distance?

Could. You. Leave?

Just "Allright, I'm out. The way you're all treating me is unacceptable. See ya never." And walk out the door? You'd be able to gain distance as the kid grew older. As long as you hid? You be homeless, without papers, but free.

A sentient Quirk means free will. Means you don't HAVE to do shit. It's like being born with a twin, not a slave. And that Twin does NOT have to put up with your bullshit. YOU are the one asking THEM to work with you, after all.

This? Of course, ALSO just ABSOLUTELY BEGS the question? What if that four year old grew up to be a BASTARD? Just... NO self reflection or empathy. Everything is everyone else's fault, always. And they want a NEW Quirk. One that won't question them.

So they sell theirs, buy a new one. Probably die off screen trying to throw it around.

What happens to you THEN? Pain, obviously. Like... massive, massive amounts of pain. You ARE a Quirk. You're being ripped out by your metaphorical roots. By the NERVE ENDINGS. But? Do you... for lack of a better word, "reset"?

Are you back infront of "your" person? Or do you stay, safely, where you are? Both would be fascinating, honestly. Because I imagine All for One? Does NOT get sentient quirks often. If at all.

They'd sooner kill themselves.

After all, if your choice is "kill yourself and your beloved twin" or "be ripped apart and watch them die horribly, then be used to go against everything you both stood for"? You weep and promise to make it fast.

Then you make it fast.

It's... really annoying, I'd imagine, for All for One. It's not necessarily that he WANTS a sentient Quirk. But they are INTERESTING. And he likes interesting.

He also likes owning things that can't leave. Ever.

So of course he'll poke and prod at the Quirk. It will inevitably be a nightmare, either way. Because EVERY Sentient Quirk has some degree of communication aspect to it. Just because the original holder never figured it out, doesn't mean HE can't.

And while your range may now be much, MUCH bigger? Because the fucker is strong as hell? How useful is that... if he can talk to you when ever HE feels like it? Day or night. 24/7.

And that's assuming you don't reset. God help you if you reset. Because THEN your STANDING infront of, most likely, pre-face-smash All for One. Who's looking at you like he just won a Mildly Interesting Prize and you would PREFER HE NOT. But what are you gonna do?

Walk out again?

You think THAT'S an option here?!

I mean... you can and do TRY. But, obviously not. So like? Fuck ™.

THEN the question becomes? Would YOU go to Tarturaus. Are you a hostage? Or an accomplice? You have the same level of power and authority as a cat, deliberately knocking pages of tables and cups to the floor, but... like? Oooooh~ oh yeah! THATS gonna slow him down! His empire crumbles beneath the sheer MIGHT of your petty inconveniences!

*trips the doctor again*

Fffffuck you.

#bnha #bnha ponderings #minji's writing #minji's ponderings #bnha oc #sentient quirks #all for one #prompt i guess?#bnha prompt

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hauntedwitch04 · 1 year

Note

can you please do a plus size reader insecure with dean winchester?

Perfect

Dean Winchester x plus size!Reader

Words: about 2.1k words

Warning: saddy sadness, and some allusion to sexy times since we are talking about Dean so they are obviously there.

Author’s note: Hi love! Thank you so much for your request. I felt really inspired by your idea and I hope you like how it came out!

p.s. I got very caught up in the topic, since it is something I feel very close to. Ever since I was a little girl, I was never a very skinny kid, and on more than one occasion I was teased by my classmates when I was in middle school, so I let myself go and put a little bit of me in the one-shot.

Always remember that it is normal to have good days and bad days, but the important thing is not to let the bad days have it. Keep fighting until the end, because losing a battle does not matter, what is important is to win the war. Everyone is perfect and beautiful in their own way, and your body does not define the person you are.

In case you need someone to talk to, I am always here, don't be afraid to seek help because often having someone close by to remind you that the volume of that evil voice we hear inside can be lowered or eliminated is important.

Requests are open I Ask

My masterlist

Join the Taglist

Buy me a coffee - Patreon submission

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You look at that slice of cake for the umpteenth time, and you can't help but hear that voice in your head again, evil, whispering all your lifelong insecurities.

Dean has been talking to a girl at the counter for a few minutes, and you can't help but notice how thin she is compared to you, how beautiful she is by the standards society imposes today, standards you have never respected.

You were never a very skinny girl, in fact from a very young age you had your curves, but that never appeared to be a problem until that obnoxious part of your life where children grow up and become teenagers, and that makes them bad there.

For the first time you realized at the age of eleven that your physique was different from the other girls near you, and for the first time you felt different, and that feeling you know deep down never went away.

You tried a thousand diets, and just as many exercises to lose weight, but it almost seemed as if your body didn't want to, so you learned to live with your body. In the beginning it was not easy, you had to face many battles, some you won and some you lost, but somehow your bitter enemy, the figure that is reflected in the mirror every morning, watching you live, judging all the actions you do, is always with you and you cannot get rid of it.

When you first met Dean you were sure that he would not give you a second glance, and that in the event nothing more than a simple friendship would arise as much as you were attracted to the attractive hunter, but against all expectations, only after a few months of knowing you he asked you out and confessed that he was madly in love with you, and that he could no longer live a second of his life. It had been such a strange moment: he was going on and on about all the romantic movies, books, and TV series he had seen himself during that time to find the perfect way to tell you everything he felt and that he finally did it in the bathroom of a movie theater after you had been attacked by a demon while watching a movie; on the contrary, you had remained silent the whole time, wondering how such a handsome, kind, funny, caring, and any other positive adjective in the human vocabulary, man could feel anything for you.

You had realized you were stuck, when waking up from that transe state you had seen him looking at you frightened, and you couldn't help but ask him, with tears in your eyes, "Why me, you could have anyone you want? Why should you only want me, you deserve better." You say sobbing, trying to hold back the tears, not wanting to show him the inner struggle you were fighting all the time with the same voice that is bringing you down today. He had taken your chin in one of his strong hands, made you lift your face and looked straight into your eyes. In those big green eyes you felt as if you could see a meadow in which you could run free of all thought, free to be whoever you wanted to be, and that is what Dean is to you after all, a safe haven in which to seek comfort.

"I want you, and you alone. And already that is a selfish thought, because love, if anyone does not deserve the other it is me, because you are perfect and I am everything but perfect, and I know you deserve so much better, and yet I am selfish and I cannot help but love you and want you to be mine and only mine." Said the man in front of you before kissing you. Immediately you melted like ice cream in the sun in his arms, and you returned the kiss with all the passion and eagerness you were willing to let him know that his feelings were reciprocated. His warm, fleshy lips on yours moved to the rhythm of a dance that only you seemed to know. After a few minutes we parted, needing to breathe again, but both of you had two silly smiles on your faces, of two people stupidly in love with each other, unable to hide it from the world for a second longer. "I have Jane Austen and her Mr. Darcy to thank next time I see her in heaven. Or was it in hell?" Whispered Dean chucklingly before resting his forehead on yours.

"Winchester, we would have a demon to exorcise in the other room." You reminded him, laughing at his earlier statement, before punching him lightly in the chest. "And don't ever make fun of Jane Austen again, I love her books and I won't let you do that." You continued, pretending to give him a dirty look.

"Why do you think I read them?" He replied, winking at you before leaving the room to go deal with the demon, whom you had almost forgotten about.

A voice suddenly brings you back to reality. You look up from the pie in front of you and see Sam's worried eyes trying to decipher your thoughts, which, like a hurricane, are flowing fast in your eyes, too fast to be understood.

"Hey, are you okay?" The smallest Winchester asks you, with a tugged smile, as if you had forgotten how to smile and he wanted to help you learn it again. You then try to smile back at him and nod, not having the heart to tell him that today the battle in the mirror between you and your reflection was won by the mirror, and that as of this morning you feel like crap emotionally, because you feel like crap about your own body.

"I'm just tired, and I'm not very hungry. I think I'll give it to Dean, after all, he's always happy to have a little extra cake." You say trying to be convincing. In fact, it's been about five days since you've really been able to put anything under your teeth, after seeing a girl flirting with Dean in a bar in the town of your last case. Dean had immediately declined the girl's attentions, saying that he was committed to you and loved you, but a self-defense mechanism had sort of been triggered in your brain, telling you that if you didn't want to lose the only person you'd ever really loved in the world, you had to lose weight, and so you started not eating, obviously in secret from Dean.

The lack of food in your stomach has also brought you immense fatigue, in fact you don't even realize that you have left the diner and are now in the car from how foggy your brain is. As soon as you sit in Baby's seat, sleep takes over your body, so much so that you don't even feel Dean pick you up and carry you inside to your motel room. You awaken hours later on the bed you and Dean have been sharing since you arrived in this town, but neither he nor Sam can be seen.

Slowly you get up and drag yourself into the bathroom. You turn on the light and immediately a figure is revealed to you in the mirror. You don't even look like yourself anymore, your skin is white and emaciated, so much so that it looks like that of a ghost; the black circles under your eyes are more pronounced than usual, and an immense sadness shines through your eyes, yet you can't help but be happy to see that your face looks slightly slimmer than it did a couple of days ago. Bitter tears run down your face knowing that being happy about that thing is not right, and that what you are doing is not good for your health, yet you cannot stop that little voice in your head from speaking.

Suddenly you hear the bathroom door open and see before you the frightened and confused face of your boyfriend, who looks at you shocked, seeing the tears on your face. Quickly he approaches you, asking if you are hurt and taking your face in his hands. You try hard to pull away from him, but you are not strong enough. You don't want him to feel your impefect body, he doesn't deserve it, yet he continues to hold you in his arms, while a hand gently strokes your back, trying to calm you down.

"Love, what's going on? Why are you crying? What can I do to help you?" Dean whispers to you, in turn with tears ready to run down his cheeks not knowing how he can take away the pain you are feeling so intensely.

"I'm sorry Dean, I'm really sorry. I've tried, but I can't." You sob, against his shoulder, stopping fighting him and letting yourself go into his embrace.

"What did you try to do love?" The elder Winchester asks with a veil of fear.

"I tried to be a better girlfriend, I tried to lose weight, but I can't. The voice is right, I don't deserve you, I never deserved you. I don't know how you can really love someone like me." You continue crying, falling to your knees, accompanied by his strong arms, as he follows you, also kneeling on the floor. Your figures seem to merge in this embrace, as you tell him of all your insecurities, of the evil voice that dwells within you and hinders your every hope for happiness, and how these days you have preferred to starve yourself in order to be a girl worthy of being seen at Dean Winchester's side. He listens to you in silence, as tears furrow his face and fall silently on your hair, since he has his chin resting on top of your head, while you hide your face in his chest seeking the comfort of his heartbeat and his scent as you open your soul to him on the motel floor of a godforsaken town.

When you're done, you can't help but breathe a sigh of relief, feeling your heart lighten, and uncertainly you look into Dean's eyes and see his sadness, and immediately feel guilty knowing that you are the cause of that feeling. In a moment as if he is reading your mind, however, he immediately stops you and reassures you.

"Love, first of all, the next time you hear this voice or these feelings inside you, don't hesitate and come to me right away, because I love you and I don't want to see you suffer like this and you know that I am always there for you, no matter what, even if you just have to ask me why the color blue is blue at three o'clock in the morning on a Saturday, I am always there for you, I am your love slave." Says the hunter, kissing the last tears streaming down my face. "And secondly, you don't have to change in any possible universe, because you in each of them are perfect as you are. There is not one thing about you that I don't love madly: your hair, your eyes, your intelligence, your laugh, your body-oh God don't get me started on how your body drives me crazy, because believe me I could start a new religion just to worship you as the goddess you are. Every day I have to hold myself back from kissing every inch of your body, from screaming to the world that you are mine, that the best woman in the world is in love with me, and I still don't understand how that is possible. There is not one thing you do that is not perfect in my eyes, and even now I still think that never on earth and in heaven has there been a more perfect being than you, so please don't ever again believe what your brain tells you and believe me." He continues, as he looks into your eyes. You have never felt so loved in your life. The only thing you want to do is thank him, but no words come out of your mouth, so you kiss him, showing him how you feel about him. Slowly Dean gets up, taking you in his arms, not breaking the kiss. Only when you reach the front of the bed and he drops you on it, your lips part and he says a few words.

"I would say it's time to prove that I wasn't joking when I said I would found a religion just to worship your body."

And boy was he not joking.

#hauntedwitch04's writing #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x plus size reader #dean winchester fanfiction #deanwinchesterxreader #supernatural x reader #plus sized!reader #plus size!reader

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starsandhughes · 1 year

Text

Guide to Penalty Box: Sissy Lore, Character Relationships, Bits, History

i reread all of penalty box so you don’t have to! this post is mainly for my benefit, but also for anyone new to the series <3

General Masterlist — 22-23 Season — 23-24 Season

Sissy

Basic Things About Her:

She is NOT legally a Hughes! She grew up with them and they took her in when they moved to Michigan for Jack when he went to USNTDP. They call her their sister, she calls them her brothers, and calls Jim and Ellen mom and dad

Her birth parents were neglectful and mentally abusive. She often stayed at the Hughes house even in elementary school. They put a bed in their game room for her before the move where she got her own room

She is an event planner and has her own business!

Very, very obsessed with The Hunger Games series

She will quote it, reference it, and force everyone to watch it any chance she gets

She's a runner when she's drunk!

The whole group has air tags they use for parties because of this, and even then someone is normally physically attached to her

A story of her running away is in Cruel Weather (Part Two)

She '146' tattooed on her wrist. The 1 is for Trevor, the 4 is for Quinn and Luke, and the 6 is for Jack (and later, Jamie)

She'll joke around with Jack if he gets her on her nerves that the 6 is only for Jamie now

She has the date she moved in with the Hughes's on her collar bone in Roman numerals

She's a sleepy girl! Can't get ahold of her? She's most likely sleeping

She has many sons. Most of the UMich team 101 is a fatherless child, but some have fathers!

Fatherless children: Dylan, Mark, Adam, Luca, Seamus, and Rutger (Fathered children are listed under their father)

She's a bitter! Everyone is used to it, but any time it happens for the first time with someone new, someone has to explain that it's her little deranged way of showing love. Ethan will stick his arm out if she bites Luke (or anyone) to demand love

She goes under people's shirts when she's overwhelmed with emotions. When she does it, you know she trusts you

Sissy & Co are big fans of game nights and she is very, very competitive! They have monthly game nights in whatever way can

Every teammate, on all the teams, adore her and she loves them so much

She gives the teams (mainly the Ducks, obviously) good bags after each game! The more she learns at each player, the more personal the bags

She calls Troy and Dani Terry mom and dad, and she also calls Shatty mom

She's a huge Dallas Stars fan! Her favorite is Robo, and she always (with slim exceptions like if Quinn and Trevor etc play each other) flies to see any of her friends play against them.

She will drop everything if anyone, anyone needs her

She's terrified of storms

She's picky about who gets to call her Sissy and will fight over it.

Sissy exceptions: Dylan because he's known her so long, Cole gets a once a month pass, and Spencer Knight can anytime

Gives creative insults and has no filter

She's a Pink Whitney girly

She has weekly face times with Petey and Matty

She's so clumsy. Extremely so. She is frequently bruised because of it

She's really touchy and will cuddle and fall asleep on anyone

She's a Slytherin

She keeps scrapbooks! For literally anything and everything!

She loves poetry, and frequently uses Atticus poems

Random Lore:

She will leave at any given moment and tell no one. And not just to go out, she'll hop on a plane to see any of her boys. She won't even tell the person she's coming to see. She'll just show up. None of this out of spite, she's just forgetful

Once, she missed Quinn and spontaneously got on a plane to go see him while Trevor was gone without telling anyone. Not Trevor, not Quinn, no one. There was a big freak out. (This was not the first time)

She rented a minivan out of spite during the 2023 development camp so that she could take some of the Ducks boys out after it to get them know them better (it did not take long for the under 20s to call her mom)

In high school, she made her own NTDP hoodie with Jack's, Trevor's, Cole's, and Alex's numbers on the back and wore it every game

She'll occasionally give out gold star stickers (she's basically pavloving them) and once Jack annoyed her and she took his back

She gets her boys a trophy for their first goals of the season

There's a yearly tradition where the day before training camp begins for everyone, Sissy and the Hughes boys (and whoever wants to join) get together to work out together. Sissy is forced to participate but she does not do it for long before she taps out

Brock calls her Princess Hughes and she calls him her Blonde Princess

Frequent Gags:

She gives, and receives, penalties of various minutes for random things. It started from the Shoulder Check Showcase where Trevor did not get a tripping penalty (when he def should have)

Putting someone on probation

Telling someone they aren't friends/sons/etc for a random amount of minutes

Teasing between anyone is done if a "big" word is used. College dropout jokes are made

Random hashtags

Sap is said a lot. At any given opportunity. No one can stay serious for long. Also Simp, but less frequently

"Who's Sissy's least favorite Hughes" "Quinn" (this a gag with random commenters)

Various contracts will be mentioned. Mainly the Best Friend Contract and the Princess Treaty. I have no real explanations or full components of said contracts

Trevor protesting not being able to call her Sissy

Any mentions about high school or senior year. It's all a mystery. It is frequently said that she was crazier.

Most common insult is human dildo

She'll occasionally create the comment section herself and tell the boys to say nice things or specific things

What Jerseys She Wears:

Ducks: She rotates between Trevor's and Jamie's

Ducks vs Canucks: Trevor, Quinn, and Jamie have to play air hockey to decide. If there's no time before, they play iMessage games

Ducks/Canucks vs Habs/Kings: Trevor's or Quinn's

Devils vs Canucks/Ducks: Quinn's or Trevor's

Devils vs. Habs/Kings: Jack and Luke play rock, paper, scissors

Habs vs Kings: Alex and Cole play iMessage games

Panthers vs Anyone: Matty and Spencer play rock, paper, scissors when Spencer is playing. Otherwise, she wears Matty's (except for Canucks and Ducks)

Anyone vs Stars: Jason Robertson's (Robo)

Trevor

Nicknames: Z-Baby, Sweet Boy

He had a crush on Sissy since the moment her saw her

First Date: March 16, 2018 (Junior Year)

They also say their first real kiss was that day, since the other two were practically forced by their friends

Officially Dating: March 22, 2018

First time they said I love you: July 18, 2018

Engagement Date: April 14, 2023

They'll cuddle in any way possible (post on gen. masterlist)

Sissy will "train" with him. And by train I mean she's more like his personal cheerleader, but she'll do some things with him on a lower level

Big PDA couple

They'll sleep anywhere when they're drunk. Counters, tables, closets, horizontally on the bed, anywhere. It phases no one anymore

Sissy will take any and all of his clothes, so all of their clothes are mixed together in their closet. She'll steal clothes from anybody, so sometimes he's accidentally put on someone else's hoodie with their perspective team on it

There's a tradition on his birthday where everyone (that can be there) has a sleepover in the living room. They make a giant fort and watch movies and it's pure chaos

They have matching tattoos of otters on their hands so that when they hold hands, it looks like the otters are

They call each other sweet girl and sweet boy

He kisses her to wake her up. She calls it "Disney Princess style"

Leo is their first and only adopted son

More headcanons are listed on the general masterlist!

Quinn

Nicknames: Quinny Baby, Quinny, Huggy, Quinnjamin

He's not only her big brother, but he's also Sissy's best friend in the entire world

They have a Best Friend Contract

There is a rule that everyone knows that they do not let go of each other until they're both ready. No one else is allowed to touch her, and no one can take her away from him. Not even Trevor

Her going under shirts started with him (blurb: here)

Her and Quinn's son is Cole McWard! (blurb: here)

Trevor asked him for permission before he asked Sissy out. He's officiating their wedding, so it's like it has come full circle. (Fic: here)

She cries every time he leaves, especially after games when she barely gets to see him

He is a professional "Sissy catcher" because she will stand on surfaces that are not meant for standing on

He's the one that bought her Robo jersey

She gave him a "Best Big Brother In The Universe" trophy when they were kids and he still has it

He has a list of random things Sissy says when she's lovey clingy drunk

They officially became best friends when she was in 4th grade

Before Trevor, she had a boyfriend in freshman year. The breakup was hard for her because it was her first one, so Quinn drove down from UMich to be with her for a couple of days

She’ll call him anything under the sun, but she often uses Quintin when she’s upset or in pain (sometimes randomly). She used it a lot in middle school

Jack

Nicknames: Jacky Boy, Soulmate, Howdy Rowdy, Twin

She met everyone through him. They were in kindergarten together and were thrilled to live near each other

They have the same birthday (hence twins)

Jack often jokes he's older than her because he was born 4 hours and 36 minutes before her

They tend to make bets. Everyone had an "intervention" to stop them and limit to Ducks vs Canucks games, but they do not listen

They spontaneously went to Vegas in the peak of the bets starting. Only Trevor knew.

They have a special connection. They know what the other is saying with just a look. They call it "Hugheslepathy"

Sons: Luke and Ethan (He's her first officially adopted son)

Luke is a son because he accidentally called Sissy mom during the one month her and Jack dated (they decided it was too weird and broke up) (it was before the move)

She gives him a painted puck every year on their birthday, and he gives her a charm for her charm bracelet. When he knows it's full, he gets her a new one. (Full imagine: Sweet Sixteen)

She's changing her middle name to Rowden after her and Trevor get married to match him

They will wrestle each other, but he's always careful to make sure she doesn't hit her head on anything with how clumsy she is

They are THE unhinged duo

Sissy cried and slept in Jack's bed for weeks after Quinn left for USNTDP

Luke

Nicknames: Lukey Moosey, Moose, her son

He was the one that first called her Sissy

She's very protective of him and always feels the need to stay strong around him. When they were younger, she'd hold it together if she was upset or hurt in front of him. She also did it in the hospital after the car crash.

Just like with Quinn, if he needs her physical touch, she doesn't let go until he's ready. It's just a rarity.

Cute childhood Luke story in his Debut post!

Luke walked in on Sissy and Trevor making out during the spring break they first got together. He had a talk with Trevor alone warning him not to hurt his sister, despite him being so young at the time

Jamie

Nicknames: Jamie Baby, Ex Husband

Him and Sissy are very close and very supportive of each other

When he got hurt, she left the stands to be with him. She stayed home from games while with him to take care of him when it was the roughest

They used to be "husband and wife" and she calls him her favorite ex-husband

They had silicone rings and everything

They used to joke that Trevor was their kid (he hated it) until they got engaged

It took him a while to fully warm up to her because he's so quiet, but they easily became as close as she is to the other guys when he did

When Sissy and Trevor fall asleep on the couch, he'll carry her up to bed and then wake up Trevor so he can go to bed himself

When he learned why she goes under people's shirts, she made sure to tell her that it was okay for her to do it to him

He sat on the floor and held her hand while she did an online interview to work an important event because she was anxious about it

It was her idea for Jamie to move in with her and Trevor

Cole

Nicknames: Coley Woley

Known as Best Friend Number Two (fic: here)

She'll call him Best Friend Number One to mess with Quinn sometimes

Sissy's man of honor for the wedding

Has a once a month pass to call her Sissy

They've kissed, but it was more of as a joke. Full story on the Engagement post

Sissy, Cole, and Alex have a yearly "Best Friend's Weekend" with no boyfriends/girlfriends or brothers. It started in high school

In high school, Sissy would often go to Cole and Alex's room to smoke, vent, etc

Him and Alex 100% knew Sissy liked Trevor before she really knew herself

Sissy is the nicest to him at all times. He hardly gets the aggressive but loving teasing and belittling (also out of love)

Just she like was there for Jamie, she flew out to see Cole and help out after his surgery in the 22-23 season

Alex

Nicknames: Turc, Turcs, Lexi

Her main smoking partner after high school (especially since he lives so close)

He stole her bong and will not give it back

Sissy, Alex, and Cole have weekly movie nights where they facetime and use watch parties

Once when she fell asleep on him, Quinn threatened him to not move even though he had to pee until Alex was "about to pee on her"

He calls her Girly Hughes

Matthew Tkachuk

Nicknames: My Rat, Matty Ratty, Matty, Rathew (rare)

Sissy had the biggest crush on him in middle and high school and talked about him all of the time

She'll often joke to Trevor that she'll him for Matty when he's on her nerves (lovingly)

She begged Quinn to invite him to her sixteenth birthday party and she got so excited she fell over the couch (fic: here)

He calls her Little Mouse (occasionally sissy)

They have adopted Mackie as their son! It happened when the team went to Universal Studios (Oct. 4, 2023) when Sissy flew out to them without telling anyone (again)

She facetimed him angry when she found out through twitter he played with a broken sternum (and also cried. she's a crier)

She flew out there after and yelled at Brady in person

Spencer Knight

Note: he has not been in the series until the summer before and preseason of 23-24

Nickname: Spency

He had a big part in the egging on for Trevor and Sissy to have their first kiss at a party (full story: Knight in Shining Armor)

He has Sissy pass, and it's not limited. There's not really an explanation for it, but he wasn't as close in the group like the others, so she let him as a way for them to be closer

She was THRILLED when he got drafted to the Panthers, and called him when Matty got traded saying that he was going to love "Her Rat"

She flew to Boston without telling anyone for his first game during Trevor’s rookie year. That’s what started her thing of randomly going to see someone without telling anybody

Hughes Childhood/HS Things

When Quinn first went to USNTDP, they all would have facetime sleepovers. Quinn built his own fort in his dorm, and Jack, Luke, and Sissy built their own. This is still done today, but anyone can be involved

Forts are a big thing for them. They built a fort at any given opportunity (and still do)

They have a yearly "Brothers Weekend" with Sissy where it's just them four

Quinn walked her to class in elementary school. He always made sure her hair was how she wanted before he left to his own class

He gave her hoodie when he left while she was in middle school so he was still "walking her to class"

There's a yearly twister game at the Lake House every summer and has been since they first started spending summers together

"Hugheslepathy" isn't just for Jack and Sissy, theirs is just the strongest. They can all practically read each other's minds

Quinn officiated a wedding between Sissy and a poster of Finnick Odair. Everyone was forced to attend. Luke was the flower boy.

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more will be added as the series develops!

#penalty box series #trevor zegras #quinn hughes #penalty box series: asks #penalty box series: blurbs

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