#based off the cinderella short!

[freckled-paints]

Story time!

this was my contribution for the bluey fanzine!

can you spot the long dog?

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Gangsters Win

Organized, in each category, by ones I'm enjoying most at the top. Delayed October reviews included this week! (Still traveling but now in home territory and familiar hotels.)

Nov 2023 Wk 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

My Dear Gangster Oppa (Thurs iQIYI) 2 of 8 - GIVING ME LIFE. How dare they be this… this... Just. How dare!

Twins the series (Fri GaGa) ep 1 of 10 - I have been waiting for another truly sports centered BL since HIStory 2: CTL. This is nowhere near as good, but I don’t care. It’s great pulp and Sprite is a fab central character. I've realized that I love the pulps most when they’re ridiculously soapy (identical twins identity trope for sport’s fuck’s sake) but ERNEST about it (not campy). This one is taking itself seriously and it's so cute that it's trying so hard. Good little pulp. Dee mar.

Dangerous Romance (Fri YT) ep 12fin - was it me or did this show kinda flag on you too?

Poor, struggling Sailom is forced to tutor his bully, Kang, and they fall for each other despite circumstances. I loved it for the first 4 eps, liked it for the middle 4, and then kinda lost interest. I think it's because the focus shifted from Sailom to Kang, and I just find a disenfranchised character more interesting than the poor little rich kid archetype. Ultimately the script waffled and failed these actors - the leads and sides were solid, and support cast on point. 8/10 pretty standard 2023 GMMTV fair

Absolute Zero (Thai Weds iQIYI) ep 6 of 12 - It’s sort of a paradox of emotions not just time. It remains sad and I remain wary. 

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) The Camp Fire ep 11 of 24 - Launched with an argument over rude pronouns and mistaken identity. Highlights the joy of camping. Ugh. I don't think this one is for me despite the pair.

Venus in the Sky (Tues iQIYI) ep 10fin - NO SINGING. I can't believe they brought in rando SIDEs just to sing! WHHHHYYYYY? Sigh.

An indifferent pulp with indifferent acting and poor chemistry (despite high heat) based on the reunion romance trope that was just... so... slow... It wasn’t entirely a waste of time but I can’t in good faith recommend it. unless you have a very high tolerance for Thai pulps and ultra tsundere characters. 5/10 ONLY WATCH IF YOU'VE NOTHING BETTER TO DO

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Kiseki: Dear to Me (Taiwan Tues Viki & iQIYI) ep 12 of 13 - I don’t mean to be rude because you know I love the main couple in the show, but they are simply being out acted by the sides. They are so damn good. Ai Di and his dumb oversized sweaters and flappy flappy sleeves is EVERYTHING.

Bump Up Business (Korea Gaga) 5-6 of 8 - More language negotiation, so of course I like it. I also like that they openly let Eden admit to a crush on a boy. I like this whole thing way more than I should. Save me from myself?

You Are Mine (Taiwan Fri Viki) eps 9 of 10 - I don’t understand why baby boy is trying to escape so badly. (Except for plot reasons.) Running of the gays! Look at you Taiwan stealing Japan’s favorite trope. This show is fun but it’s a bag of tropes held together with some very thin fraying mesh plot. 

If It’s With You AKA Even If I Fall In Love With You AKA Kimi to nara Koi wo Shite Mite mo’ (Japan Gaga) ep 5fin - The leads are so painfully cute portraying a softly simple story of teen first love. This was a nice little piece with an early yaoi feel that come off as brief, as if it were meant to be a short story that had been extended into a series. Sweet but ultimately rather forgettable. 7/10  

Mr Cinderella 2 (Vietnam Sat YT) ep 6-7 of ? - yeah I forgot to watch again, I may be dnfing this by accident.

It's Airing But...

I Cannot Reach You AKA I Can't Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai (Japan Tues Netflix-Japan & ????) - in classic JBL fashion, I Cannot Reach You could not be reached. It looks good though so I mgiht put some effort into finding it grey.

Look at Japan dropping all the tropes in on scene: rooftop, kabedon, hand hold.

SHADOW (Thai Gaga) 1-7 of 14 - this is a horror BL with ghosts & paranormal elements in a boarding school setting. I'm not wild about Thai horror (or horror at all). It features Singto (who did paranormal BL He's Coming to Me) opposite Fluke N (who's done a couple horror's before). Also Fiat. Dan suffers from sleep paralysis, and in his dreams he sees a shadow that suffocates him. It gets worse when he transfers schools. I'm holding off on this one and if told it's good I'll binge watch.

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) ep 1 of 10 - I find this series more fun to binge, so I'm waiting until it completes its run.

One Room Angel (Japan Gaga) - adaptation of Harada’s manga of the same name (which I did not like) about a convenience store clerk who's stabbed, nearly dies, and returns home to find an angel waiting for him. With only 5 eps and a good chance this won’t end happy, I'm gonna wait and let you tell me how it goes.

Can I Buy Your Love From A Vending Machine? AKA Sono Koi, Jihanki de Kaemasu ka? (Japan cinema release in-country only) - This one is a movie from Japan so in customary fashion who tf knows when (or if) it will get international distribution. Salaryman Ayumu Koiwai just can't tear his eyes away from the strong, muscular man as he checks on the stocks of the vending machine in his office. I did some hunting but only found the manga, so I'm marking it cnf and moving on with life. This will be its last appearance on the weekly update.

I Finished It!

Love in Translation (iQIYI) ep 8 - solid ending, man these two are a great pairing.

A sweet little pulp about a Thai boy with a crush on a Chinese influencer who ends up in a business relationship with her ex-bf. This show had truly great chemistry between the leads, cute found family with good rep, and an exciting (if silly) ending that almost, but didn't quite, make up for how incredibly annoying the main character was in the first half. Gotta say the make-out scene in the convenience store is one of the greatest in Thai BL, tho. 6/10 DEF WORTH WATCHING BUT FLAWED

I Feel You Linger in the Air (grey) ep 8 of 12 - so that was A THING. I did a seriously extensive deep dive analysis, historical & linguistic extras, and review here.

I truly loved this time travel romance. IFYLITA is an exquisite BL, from filming techniques to narrative framework (much like Until We Meet Again). Steeped in history and family drama it edges into lakorn (but no as much as To Sir With Love and with way less scenery chewing). This is an elegant and classy BL… from Thailand which normally doesn't even try for classy. The main couple (both as a pair and individuals) were excellent, particularly Bright (Yai) whose eye-work acting style is a personal favorite of mine. Pity about the ending. Oh it wasn’t that sad but it wasn’t good either. This show should easily have earned a 10 from me except that it fumbled the… erm… balls. Argh. Whatever. 9/10

Only Friends (YT) ep 11-12 - What can I say, this wasn't my thing, it was never gonna be, and I didn't like it. Basically Thailand did the L-Word but with branded BL pairs and the only agenda seemed to be slut shaming and making sure those pairs stayed healthy and sponsor ready. Consequently, the pairs were all executing well and to the best of their ability (of course) but all other characters got shafted, both in the good and the worst possible ways. Unrated but if falls somewhere between 5 (hot mess) and 3 (what am I doing with my life?)

Next Week Looks Like This

11/10 Middleman’s Love (Thai Fri Mandee's YT & iQIYI 1 of 8? - TutorYim (brand pair origin = Cutie Pie) with side couple KingUea (Bed Friends) from Domundi trailer here. This used to be a JimmyTommy vehicle before the pair split (also prev title Middle Love). Adapted from a Y-novel. Jade works as a graphic designer and has always been stuck in the middle - average. His heart is hardened after a life spent being overlooked because he is not as charming or good looking as the rest of his family or friends. When his office gets a hot new intern, Mai, Jade assumes Mai couldn’t possibly be intersted in him. Mai, of course, has other ideas. Warning this is a Cheewin comedy so tonally it could be very OFF, but the cast is solid, and I have liked his stuff on occasion.

11/10 Last Twilight (Thai Fri YouTube) - JimmySea are bakc and maybe it's good this time? I dont' know, GMMTV isn't doing great right now. Burdened with heavy debt, Mork, a mechanic, is forced to take a high paying job as a caretaker for Day, a rich heir who suffers from partial blindness after an accident. Day recruits Mork as he realizes the latter does not see him as a disabled person, but rather as co-equals. As they spend time together, the two begin developing feelings for the other. However with Day just having 180 days until he becomes permanently blind, how will the two weather the trials ahead?Upcoming November BL

11/11 Beyond The Star (Weds iQIYI) qp 1 of 8 - Looks like House of Stars meets Boyband. I am not excited.

Upcoming in November

11/16 PLAYBOYY (Thurs ????) ?? eps - trailer here, high heat and it's helmed by Cheewin (shudder) with screenplay by Den (Only Friends) under Copy A Bangkok. It's gonna be a shizz show people. It's predicting Thai style "dark" (War of Y) one of my least favorites. Apparently there is a "plot" but when has Cheewin ever bothered with plot? A university kid who was involved with escorts, sex-trade, porn, online hook-ups, drugs, prostitution, blackmail, revenge, and so forth goes missing. His twin (sigh) and two friends look for him.

11/17 Pit Babe (Fri iQIYI) ep 1 of 14 - high heat teaser here, based on alittlebixth's omegaverse novel #พิษเบ๊บ’ set in the world of car racing (author says show will not be omegaverse). Charlie (fresh face), a young hot nerd, approaches his driver idol (Pavel "my love" 2 Moons 2) to borrow a racing car and win one for the team. Production house is new to BL but behind the Club Friday stuff. Show stars many known actors: Nut (Oxygen), Pop (Ram in La Cuisine), Pon (Phai in Gen Y, we LOVE him), Benz (twins in En of Love: This Is Love Story).

11/19 Bake Me Please (Sun Gaga) ep 1 of 6 - trailer here, stars Ohm (of OhmFluke) opposite Guide (bestie from IFYLITA) and possibly also Poom (well known, but not for BL). This looks like an actually gay version of Antique Bakery (play it again, BL). Still, I'm intrigued, it looks HELLA pretty.

11/22 7 Days Before Valentine (Weds ????) ep 1 of 10 - trailer here, horror-esk. Adapted from y-novel of the same name, directed by Tu (180 Degree) stars Jet (Why You… Y Me?). When you want your old love again, but fate sends you a reaper instead. All he can do for you is kill people. I'll likely give this a pass and wait to binge later. I'm planning to try SHADOW and I can only handle one Thai horror at a time.

11/25 The Sign (Sat ????) ep 1 of 10 - trailer here, horror-esk, but with a suspense and adult characters. Special investigators who loved each other in previous lives reunite with their new bodies, stars Billy Patchanon (BillySeng) & Babe Tanatat (new). Includes other SCOY favorites as a special investigation team. I may give this a try because I like the non-horror bits.

11/26 The Whisperer (Sun ????) 1 of 10 - trailer here. Thai horror BL that ALSO involves cheating (what joy is mine). He has dimples (My Ride) but I don't think even that gives me the will. Maybe a binge for me.

11/26 Cooking Crush (Sun YT) 1 of 12 - OffGun are back, trailer here. Adapted from the novel “Love Course! เสื้อกาวน์รุกเสื้อกุ๊กรับ” by iJune4S this is about Prem who runs a not-so-popular restaurant with 2 friends. About to go on a cooking competition with a huge reward, Prem gets involved with Ten, a stressed-out med student who wants Prem to teach him to cook.

11/30 For Him (Thurs ????) ep 1 of 10 - high heat trailer, I suspect iQIYI will scoop this one up. From the people who brought us Unforgotten Night (please no) based on a y-novel, man nursing a heartbreak has a one-night stand, but the other boy didn't want it to end. It looks terribly trashy so I'm in! Maybe I'll do a trash watch?

VIP Only (Taiwan) - may be delayed/canceled

Wuju Bakery AKA Space Bakery (Korea) - this one may be DOA

A Breeze of Love (Korea) - I know less than nothing about this.

Nov 2023 line up with screen caps here. Not kept updated.

Original 2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED).

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Yang's little smile! Argh. (Love in Translation)

This is our mean and grumpy gagster character talking about playing in game support roles. It's fucking adorable. Such a nasty criminal. (My Dear Gangster Oppa)

(Last week)

[thegayestmferintown]

i rewrote this ask like three times already trying to word it perfectly lmao. fem!yuu x octavinelle (separately). the pair attends NRC’s annual winter ball together as friends, though they’re both unaware of their mutual crushes on each other. at the end of the ball azul/floyd/jade confess their feelings!! also if possible could yuu’s dress be based on either ariel’s pink one or cinderellas original one (the silvery one) if any part of this was unclear pls feel free to message me and i’ll clear it up! my brains literally melting rn bc i just finished this horrible essay for history and tbh atp im just word vomiting everything out 😭😭

This is my second time writing this, I lost all of my progress the first time 😭

I had so much fun with the second version of Jade's part 💀

@nisobird 🚨🚨azul🚨🚨

Warnings ;; none

Relationship ;; Platonic, turned Romantic

Type ;; Short Story/One-Shot

OCTAVINELLE

Azul Ashengrotto ;; Octavinelle Housewarden ;; Second Year

You were late, and Azul was panicking. Why were you late? Did you just not want to see him? Were you just blowing him off? Azul as terrified of you not coming, not wanting to see him.

Upon seeing the doors open, revealing you, in a dress similar to that of the Sea Princesses, Azul's jaw dropped. He straightened his back upon seeing you come his way.

He gave a small laugh, "well.. you look.. wonderful." You couldn't help the small laugh that came from you, "Thank you. You can blame Vil, he wouldn't let me come in a normal outfit." You laughed.

Azul gave a laugh in return, holding his hand out toward you upon hearing a slow song start overhead. "May I.. have this dance?" He asked, obviously nervous for your response.

You gave a smile and took his hand, "You may." Azul smiled and led you to the dance floor, one hand gliding toward your hip, and the other taking your own hand.

As you danced, he cleared his throat. "If I may, I have something to tell you." You nodded, motioning for him to continue. He gave a small, nervous chuckle. "I think I... No, I know that I love you." He said quickly, before giving a sigh. "That.. wasn't as bad as I'd suspected." He said with a nervous laugh, awaiting your response.

With a small laugh and shake of your head, you responded. "I love you too, Azul."

Jade Leech ;; Octavinelle Vice-Housewarden ;; Second Year

You hung out with the tweel, not exactly fond of the dance floor, especially while wearing heels and a puffy, long dress. "Hey, Jade. Are you good at dancing?"

Jade gave a chuckle, "Why, I'd say I'm all right, but I wouldn't say I'm the best." He admitted, "Although, Floyd is a much better dancer than myself." Jade gave one of his normal, light chuckles.

"Despite how good my other half is at dancing, he finds it.. boring and uninteresting." Jade hummed, taking a sip from the punch he held in his hand.

You gave a laugh, "yeah, that sounds like Floyd." Jade simply nodded in response. "Say, may I talk to you after the ball is through? I have something to tell you." He told you, finishing off his punch.

Your brows furrowed in confusion, but you nodded nonetheless. After some more conversation with the eel, the ball was over and Jade guided you outside to somewhere quiet and concluded.

Jade turned to you, "I must admit to you that you are quite entertaining. Assuming you know my brother and I as well as you do, you know that we are very fond of those who are entertaining."

You listened, giving a nod toward the end. "Which is where I'd like to tell you that I-" A shout was heard from a tree, looking over, a fallen Floyd laid on his back at the bottom of the tree. "Oh, just tell 'em, stupid."

Jade and yourself couldn't help but laugh, "tell me what?" You asked. "I love you." He said simply, kissing your forehead lightly.

Floyd Leech ;; Octavinelle ;; Second Year

Floyd had even shocked himself upon asking you to this ball, he had no intent on even coming in the first place. But the idea of seeing you in a dress, all completely dressed up, had him in a chokehold.

"Woah. You look nice." Floyd blinked, and you laughed in response. "Thank you, Floyd." He nodded and held a cup of punch toward you, and you took it. You thanked him once more before taking a sip on it.

"Hey, Shrimpy." Floyd said, getting your attention. "Yeah? What's up?" You asked. "What do you say we get out of here?" You blinked, "Floyd, we both just got here." You said with a laugh. "I know, but if we stay any longer then Crabby or Little Mackerel will come up and steal you. So." He said, making a popping sound with his lips as he waited for your response.

You shook your head with a laugh and nodded, "alright, but where do you want to go?" Floyd shrugged, "I don't care." You laughed, before taking his hand and simply taking him back to Ramshackle.

His eyes were glued to his hand even after you'd gotten to Ramshackle. You snorted, "Floyd." You said, waving a hand in front of his face. "Huh?"

"what's up with you?" You laughed, and Floyd shrugged in response, simply resting his chin on your head. He spoke up after minutes of standing like that. "Hey, Shrimpy?" He said, "yeah?"

"Love you." He said simply, kissing the top of your head before reverting back to resting his chin on top of your head.

[christian-oc-tournament]

Please vote based on the picture AND the description!

Andre Caron [Swashbucklers of the Magic Kingdom @apieters] - Disney OC

Andre Caron is a swashbuckling young man from the French District of the Magic Kingdom (The Magic Kingdom is basically the world of "The House of Mouse"--all the Disney movies are just that--movies--and the characters have lives outside their movies, although those movies tend to be "fantastic retellings of real-life events" and there is something magical about those Storybooks from the older films...). He is the best friend of the swashbuckling tyrannosaur Chris Carnovo, and together the two of them are the fight choreographers of most of the Disney movies we all know and love ("Peter Pan" was their big break). As a kid, Andre always wanted to be a Knight of the Magic Kingdom, one of the highest honors for valor that could only be won by risking one's life in service of the Royalty of the Magic Kingdom or in the service of a sufficiently large number of people. As an adult, Andre is prone to brooding and melancholy, haunted by his memories of the great civil war known as the Reign of Terror and its leader, Tristan L'Hermite the Black Knight. He is often emotionally cold or short-tempered, prone to biting sarcasm and even fits of rage, yet when the chips are down he will always follow his best friend, Chris Carnovo, off on his galivanting adventures. The two of them complement each others' weaknesses with their strengths. If Chris is impetuous and rash in his zeal to go on an adventure and help his friends, Andre is more strategic and usually has a contingency plan to get his friend and himself out of trouble. Chris, in turn, is Andre's emotional rock, tempering the young man's irritability and sometimes even calling forth the battered remains of Andre's instincts to be a Knight. Andre is ultimately driven by a deep sense of chivalric loyalty to certain people. Chris is one. His childhood friend, Princess Cinderella, is another. The cathedral of Notre Dame and those who dwell within (the Archdeacon and Quasimodo) hold a special place in his heart as a devout Catholic. But perhaps his greatest sense of loyalty is reserved for Queen Sarabi and her family. At the very end of the Reign of Terror, Sarabi--then pregnant with Simba--was about to be killed by Tristan L'Hermite on the steps of the altar of Notre Dame cathedral, when Andre saved her life. The two of them were the only witnesses to the death of Tristan L'Hermite and the end of the Reign of Terror, and on that night Andre swore an oath of loyalty to Queen Sarabi, to her unborn cub Simba, and his lineage. That oath will drive much of his actions in the events of the present day...

Anwedd [Songs of the Fallen @ethanjhake]

A lonely ghost trapped between life and death, she’s been haunting Ryphl, the only person able to see her, since he was discharged from the Children's War.

[milimeters-morales]

So my thing with Hobie’s nicknames: I have Hobie call Lyla “Tinkerbell” or “Tink” bc she’s small, has a yellow glow, and has an attitude, so i’m probably just gonna have him base his names off of childrens’ story characters, like for example Jess would be “Kanga” and her unborn baby is “Roo”, Margo I haven’t decided yet since we don’t know much about her movie-self and Hobie wouldn’t have any character to reference bc of her technology, but from what I’ve seen she could have her nickname as something related to The Little Mermaid because while everyone is here in person, she’s in her own dimension in a life she doesn’t really enjoy, but i’m also hesitant to have him think “Cinderella” is a good name because cmon. Her parents argue a lot, and she does use being a vigilante as a form of escape, but that’s implying that they hate her and harm her, and that’s not something Hobie would say without 100% certainty. Maybe he’d just give her a non-character nickname, like Pixie (bc Pixelate, Pixie Dust, Pick-&-Choose, whatever). Okay this is getting long it’s continued under the cut.

I personally don’t like the Gwendy and Peter Pan nicknames he gave Gwen and Miles but i guess it’s cute, but i would’ve preferred something a bit more personal to Miles rather than just in relation to Gwen bc they feel less like their own people then, even tho Peter and Wendy were an adorable duo. I can see Gwen = Wendy bc she ran away from home to a “neverland” that was supposed to be a paradise basically but realizes she can’t stay, or if you take that “Gwen was going to be shot in the stomach” thing some people who worked on the movie said they got rid of and apply it to her “ghost, gwen stacy always falls, forever immortal and taking back control” thing and her relationship with death and the idea of Neverland having dead children so they are “immortal” and “never grow up” it sticks.

But (even if it’s teasing) calling Miles “Peter Pan” doesn’t even make sense because he didn’t lead her here, she led him to the Society (unknowingly). Like people want to shove “sunflower” and “flower” into everything involving Miles so badly and it feels EXTREMELY forced. I feel like Hobie would call him something else, and this is where the name “Bambi” could come in because while Miles hasn’t lost his mother or father, he’s still learning his place in the world while saving countless people now and in the future, and will eventually become a great stag, even if life wasn’t always kind to him. But again, I don’t think Hobie would do that 100% because he doesn’t really know Miles like that. Or, he could go for more recent nicknames and non-character names that are safer, like “Brave Little Toaster/Toaster” for obvious reasons, or “Spark/Bolt/Livewire” that don’t feel as child-like as “Bambi” or as forced as “Peter Pan”

I also have to take into account what things Hobie just might not have seen, because in the setting i’m talking about he’s not living in a houseboat, so he probably doesn’t have much time to see or learn about these fairytales/characters, and it’s based on chance on when he’d know about them. Because I also have to remember that his city is still highly policed and his people are forced to fit into the mold and comply to societal standards and whatnot, so even things as simple and enjoyable as short stories for kids would be heavily controlled. Libraries are fucked in his universe but they’re one of the only “safe” havens. I think it really adds to his attitude about his own life, how he’s much older than these friends despite being like 16-19, and how he feels the most responsible for them no matter how much he denies that and tries to get rid of that feeling. Calling them these nicknames gives him both the feeling of “haha, these little kids are the future and i’m an old man” and “i’m a little kid again!!”

that’s it :3

[mendesbadrepuation]

|| Hear You Me || Joe Burrow

Based off A Cinderella Story (with Hillary Duff)

A/N: I realize that this was a long time coming. Yes, I have been absent for a HOT minute. For that, I truly am sorry. But my absence will always bring new content :P My best friend has been begging for this scenario for a lonnnggggg time and I told her it would take time for me to come up with this. Just like they always say…good things take time ;)

Pairing Joe Burrow x reader

Trope: best friends to lovers

Warnings: Joe just being too stupid to see what was right in front of him all along! Angst and fluff! This was very much rushed as well and I am sorry for the time jumps :/

__________

The night air was turning colder but your body was warm. The water in the hot tub was just the perfect temperature and the jets were soothing your sore muscles. A glass of wine was perched in between your fingers and you gaze out to the city lights shining brightly. You may have been bias but Cincinnati did have the best skyline.

“Scoot over!” Your silence was broken as you see Joe coming through the sliding doors of the patio. He was wearing his swim shorts and the moment the cold air touched his skin he wrapped his large arms around his body. He was trying to keep as much heat trapped in his body as if he wasn’t about to sit in a hot tub.

You lightly giggle at his behavior and scoot over a little to allow him room to get in. He quickly steps in and sinks down slowly to allow the water to submerge him. He scoots in close to you and this relaxed sigh leaves his lips once he settles.

“I told you the hot tub would be worth it.” You say and thank your past self for purchasing it. You’ve wanted one for a long time for a lot of reasons. Joe said it would be a waste of money and he even offered to just buy you one so you’d shut up about it. You told him no because you wanted to earn that after all the hard work you put up with. Late hours at work was definitely worth every second for this moment.

“Debatable. You should have just let me buy it for you.” Joe closes his eyes and leans his head against the head rest. His body sinks even further to where his legs stretched across the tub.

“There’s no satisfaction in that.” You argue back.

“Whatever you say babe.” Joe mumbles and the pet name made you crane your neck towards him. That’s the third time he’s used that this week.

“What’s up with you and the word babe lately?” You put the air quotes around babe.

He shrugs his shoulders like it’s nothing. In all the 7 years of knowing Joe he’s never called you that. In fact, he’s only ever called you by your nickname he made for you. You two have had a long history of friendship. On either ends of the relationship you have dealt with a lot. A lot of breakups, drama, stress, and simple life hassles.

Within in the last year you began to have some subtle new feelings arise to the surface for him. Everyone knows those feelings and they all start so innocently. Of course, you love Joe. You two said it frequently but it never meant nothing more than the I care for you kinda I love you.

It wasn’t until you and him were placed in one of your college friends wedding together did you first feel it. You told yourself it was just the atmosphere from that night that made you think differently. You tried so hard to push the thought away. But it just kept coming back and it kept coming back in different forms.

In little segments or moments you slowly started to fall for your best friend. You didn’t really put it together until Joe did one thing for you. It was so simple but it’s what tipped the iceberg for you. He was there for you the moment you needed someone the most. And he saw that and knew what he had to do.

“Where did you just go? You just got really spaced out.” Joe asks and he was staring at you intently.

“Oh-I-“ you pause to come up with an excuse but nothing appeared. “Did you know this has a speaker?!” You excitedly stand and reach across Joe to get to the speaker that connects to your phone.

He grins at you as you fiddle with the volume and song selection. Your body was so close to his and deep inside of him he was losing it. Yet he knew he could never cross that thin line you two have between each other. He was terrified of losing you if he did.

You were trying to adjust the jets and your body began to slip from the position it was in. When your foot slipped was when you then fell onto Joe’s lap. Instantly your cheeks were red and not just that small pink tint, the fiery red tint. He caught you at your waist. His large hands held onto your bare sides and you’re not sure if you’d adjusted the temperature accidentally from the fall. Because the area was beginning to heat up.

His eyes meet yours as you still sat frozen in his lap. Neither of you were attempting to move from this position. Those blue eyes were glistening even more from the steam and city lights reflecting in them.

It all happened so fast. In the blink of an eye you were leaning in and he was pulling you closer to him. He places his hand up behind your neck and just like that he guides you towards his lips. The moment your lips collide is the moment everything started to align. It was an innocent kiss but a passionate one. It was as if all the energy between you two had been released.

That one kiss led to more kisses. The kisses became longer. You adjusted yourself to properly face him and straddled his thighs. He held on to you so tight. With each lingering kiss he pulls you in further and further. His hands were roaming your body. In all his years of knowing you he wondered what this would feel like. It was better than he could ever imagine. You were gasping for air and so was he. The steamy hot water multiplied everything in that moment.

“Joe.” You pull away for a moment to look him in the eyes again. It was like everything shifted inside of him. There was this unreadable look in those eyes now.

“Um I-“ He was at a lost for words and suddenly you were being lifted up off of him. He stood from his seat and climbed out of the hot tub. “I think I should go.” He announces and starts to dry off very quickly.

“Joe wait a second. We should talk about this.” You stood up and began to climb out as well. He was already through the doors that lead into the living room. You grab your towel and rush inside after him.

He was picking up his sweatshirt and throwing it over his torso in a rush. “Joe please we have to talk about this.” You step across the room to reach him but he was not listening to you.

“I shouldn’t have done that.” He says and those words stung so much.

“What do you mean ‘I’? We both made that decision.” You were trying to remain calm so he would calm down enough to talk about this.

“I shouldn’t have let it continue.” He slings his bag over his shoulder and turns away.

“So that’s it. After 7 years of this friendship you are going to turn your back on me and leave. I thought what we had was better than that.” Your eyes fill with tears and you swallow the lump in your throat. Is this a nightmare?

“I need some time to process this.” His words were short as he stood in front of you. You could see the way his tough guy ego was beginning to falter.

“Time?? Joe just talk to me. We can work this out. Please don’t leave like this.” You could hear the shakiness in your voice. Your hand reaches out for his and he pulls back away from you.

A small single tear spills over the edge and you frantically wipe it away. He takes long strides to your front door and you follow close behind him.

“Joe please.” You beg of him to acknowledge anything that just happened.

“I have to go. What just happened between us was a mistake. I need time.” Joe’s words left you concreted to the floor in a state of shock. The word mistake rang in your ear so loud.

There were no words that you could muster up to say to that. Before you knew it he was in his car and speeding down the road away from you.

—————-

A month has passed by since the kiss. Joe was now heavily drawn into his season and you were going through the motions everyday. He seemed to be doing alright without you. All his post conference interviews he seemed put together. Like nothing ever happened.

Joe hasn’t spoke to you since that night. You wanted to respect his wishes of needing time and space. But now you felt betrayed. You were missing your best friend terribly.

It was only a matter of time before you two would somehow cross paths again. Your friends all intertwined and parties did happen quite frequently. His teammates began to notice your absence rather quickly. When they questioned him about it he just brushed it off as if it was nothing. All of his closest teammates like Sam and Ja’Marr began to worry about him. He was not himself lately and it was beginning to show in practice and games.

“Joe what’s up with you and Y/n? Why hasn’t she been to our post game parties and even the wives and girlfriends at tailgates have been asking about her.” Sam comes up to Joe after practice.

Joe was sitting in front of his locker staring at his phone. He was looking at a picture of you from Halloween last year. You were decked out in a Star Wars Jedi costume. You stood in a stance with a lightsaber held in your hands as he snaps the photo. He remembers so much from that specific night.

That was the night he realized he was falling in love with you.

Joe looks up from his phone and quickly locks his screen to hide what he was doing. “What did you say?” He asks Sam to repeat himself.

“Alright that’s it. Talk to me man. You are not yourself lately. It’s starting to show on the field.” Sam cautiously begins to question Joe’s behavior.

Joe sighs and looks at Sam with this pleading look. “I messed up man.” Joe replies.

That’s when Sam pulled up a chair and sat there to listen to what Joe had to say. From the very beginning he told everything and he told his true feelings. Joe made the biggest mistake of his life walking out on you that night.

“Tonight we have our annual bonfire. One of the wives made sure that Y/n was going to be there. You need to talk to her tonight and apologize.” Sam gives the best advice he can. "Most importantly, you need to tell her how you really feel."

"Sam I can't. What if she doesn't feel the same way and it totally alters our relationship. I'd rather be in her life than not." Joe says.

"If you keep ignoring her like this, you will lose her for sure. The what if's are scary but what you did is not fair to her. She did nothing to deserve that. You need to try and fix this." Sam explains.

“It’s not going to be that easy. But I will try my best.” Joe replies.

After their talk they both go home and get ready for the bonfire that was held at Evan’s place. It was kinda ironic that Evan was the kicker and he was the one with the huge field to have this bonfire. A kicker and a field. It’s not really that ironic.

Joe was sitting by the large fire talking with his teammates. You were nowhere in site yet and Joe was beginning to think you wouldn’t show.

It took everything in you to get the courage to go. You parked your car out in front of the house and began walking towards the back entrance where the gate was. You saw all the girlfriends and wives sitting at the patio area talking and drinking a glass of pink lemonade. You knew it was spiked lemonade but that didn’t bother you one bit.

Everyone of them light up when they spot you coming through the gate. Each of them gives you a hug and asks where you’ve been. They missed you. It wasn’t uncommon for you to be the funny one in this mixed group. They love to hear your stories and you never fail to make them smile or laugh.

You sat with them for awhile catching up on the latest gossip. The wives in the group always seemed to know the dirtiest of drama. It was like something straight out of a telenovela.

“Y/n.” You hear that familiar voice say your name and you wanted to curse at yourself for the butterflies it caused. He stood across the patio area and stared at you. Joe was in awe of you and not seeing you in a month made all those feelings burst inside of him. He felt a head rush as you connect your eyes.

“Joe.” You stood from your chair and excused yourself from the ladies. You two step away out of ear shot from everyone else.

“I was beginning to think that you were not going to come.” Joe starts the conversation.

“The ladies really wanted to see me. I didn’t really want to let them down.” You reply. There was an uneasiness in your voice and you were building walls up to protect yourself.

“They do love to be around you.” He adds and you awkwardly look around the field. Joe could not do anything else but stare at you and he was doing his best to come up with the right words.

“I should probably get back to the group.” You begin to turn around until his hand reaches for your arm putting a halt to your movements.

“Wait. There is something I need to say.” You face him now and stood firm in your stance. “I just want you to know that I miss you and it’s been really hard without you this past month.” He continues to speak but there was an angry spark beginning to form inside of you.

“Is that all?” Your lips press together in a firm line.

“I’m sorry too. What I did was inexcusable.” He adds and you cross your arms in front of your chest.

“Joe you hurt me.” You say to really get your point across.

This frown forms on his face as he looks at you. “I appreciate the apology. I truly do. This entire month you didn’t once check on me. I know you said you needed your space but Joe that has never stopped you from caring. I thought I lost you.” You have to take a few deep breaths to hold back the tears. You’ve done your fair share of crying lately.

“I wish I could take back everything that I said that night. It was not fair to you. After everything we have been through I walked out on you. I was scared.” He confesses.

“Scared of what?” You question.

“I-“ He tries to find the right words for you. “I was just scared.” Is all he could say.

“Will you just tell me Joe? I’m just trying to understand what went wrong that night. You know as well as I do what that kiss meant.” Your eyes were deeply looking into his. Maybe they would have the answer you want to hear from him.

He stood there frozen in his stance now. Does he say those three words? No. His heart was so afraid of what it would do. He couldn’t do it.

“You know what? It’s not my place. I can’t wait around for you. It’s been a year of me hopelessly falling for you.” You huff out a deep sigh in annoyance. Joe’s eyes light up at the words you just spoke. Then the brick wall that protects his heart appeared so quickly.

“But waiting for you to realize what truly lies beneath the surface is like waiting for rain in the desert.” Joe couldn’t move. He was at a lost for words because everything that she was saying was true. He was to afraid of what could be instead of trying it. That was going to be his downfall.

You were standing up for yourself though. After this past month you had to do something right for you. You cared for Joe so much. That’s why you never let yourself start to heal from those words he said to you after the kiss. You wanted to keep him as close as you could. You blamed yourself for what had happened. A situation like this, it goes both ways. You knew what you had to do.

Time was something that you both needed and hopefully when things are better then you guys can repair what was broken. At least you hoped that. Joe was and will remain to be your best friend.

__________

Two weeks later you found yourself talking on the phone with Sam. He was begging you to come to the AFC Championship. Joe didn’t realize after that night of you walking away from him he lost his charm. His good luck charm to be exact.

Now his career was on the line and the Bengals were headed to the championship. A spot that would earn themselves a Super Bowl game. Joe needed all the support and help he could get tonight. All he could think about was you. He needed you back in his life.

Joe didn’t want to hurt you again though. Maybe that’s why he let you walk away. It didn’t take long for him to realize what mistake he made this time.

“Sam I don’t know. It’s been really hard for me. Even seeing him on tv is difficult. Going to the championship is way worse.” You confess to him as you sat on your couch anxiously chewing your nails.

“Please. He needs you. I know he doesn’t show it. But he needs you now more than ever. I left you your ticket with the box office. Please come. I have to get ready. I hope to see you here tonight.” Sam hangs up the phone and leaves you sitting there questioning everything.

*You can start playing Hear You Me if you wanna set the mood*

The walls you have built were surely crumbling now. You wanted to stay at home and watch rom coms all night until you cried yourself to sleep. Deep down inside of you you knew that no matter what feelings arose to the surface between you and Joe, you had to be his supporter first. He was your friend first and friends wouldn’t let each other down like that. The least you can do is show up. For one night.

With a great unsteady sigh you get up from the couch and begin to get ready. Hanging in your closet was one of Joe’s old jerseys he gave you. It was the middle of winter so you dressed in layers. A black turtle neck was worn underneath the jersey and you chose leggings with loose jeans over top to hopefully keep warm. You wore this jersey a lot. It symbolized many things for you two. It felt normal as you reach for the small gold necklace with the number 9 charm attached to it. Another gift Joe gave you with beautiful memories along with it.

Your heart was heavy and burning as you drove to the stadium. Sam even made sure you had your same parking spot that you preferred. All of those guys became your family and this just goes to show what they would do to make sure their friends are okay. The game just tipped off as you reached the box office. They immediately recognized you and slid the ticket with the pass through the window slot.

You walk through security and make your way down to the lower section in the front row right behind the bench. People noticed you and their faces lit up. You try to keep a soft smile on your face as you watch the game.

Joe hadn’t noticed you yet. You could see the frustration in his eyes and he was not playing like Joe Burrow. You felt nauseated watching the game unfold. People around you were chanting and most of all chanting his name.

You were trying so hard to keep everything together. This was much harder than you ever thought it could be. The man you so desperately love was a couple hundred feet away from you and you only wanted him. He was struggling because of the emotional toll you two have been through.

Something caught your eye quickly and you saw snow flakes begin to fall on to the field. The flakes turned into heavy flurries and filled the area quickly in this white blanket. The white snow complimented the black of their jerseys so well. The game was nearing the end and the score was tied. Sudden death was in play and you were falling apart piece by piece and second by second.

You catch eyes with Sam standing by the benches. There was this thankful look in his eyes from the realization. Joe still had no idea you were there. His body was physically and mentally exhausted as he huddled up with his teammates. This next play was detrimental for the Bengals.

Joe looks up and scans the crowd. He couldn’t help but wonder if you’d be here and the moment he saw you his heart beat skips. His eyes fill with those pesky tears and everything came crashing down at once for him. He allows his impulsive thoughts to take over and one foot led out in front of the other. He could hear his teammates yelling as he pulls his helmet off calling for a timeout.

Zac Taylor was yelling at his quarterback rather aggressively, but Joe was only focused on you. You were beginning to turn and leave so you could get out of this bitter cold snow. You couldn’t bare this place any longer.

“Y/n.” Joe yells your name. The name that rolled so perfectly off his lips. The one name that he wants to call after for the rest of his life. Fear be damned. You were all he ever needed in this world.

You turn around thinking that you were hallucinating. When you see Joe climbing the stadium wall and over the rail you locked up. He slides past a couple people and they all move out of the way to let him through. The stadium was louder than ever before. Joe grabs a hold of your sides and looks you straight in the eyes.

“Joe what are you doing?! You are going to get fined or something worst.” Your eyes were like golf balls as he just looks at you smiling.

“I’m saying something I should have said a long time ago but was the biggest chicken shit ever.” He wipes away the snow flurries that land on your pink cheeks.

“Im falling in love with you. I love you. I’m not scared anymore. I have to have you Y/n.” He confesses and you were in complete shock but a small smile formed on your face at his words.

There Joe stood in front of you, shoulder pads, cleats and sweaty

Joe cups your face and leans down to give you a kiss. The snow falls harder around you guys and the crowd around you was going in a frenzy. Both of you smile into the kiss and Joe lifts you up off the ground. Your arms swing around his neck to hold on to him.

“I’m sorry I waited for the…” he pauses for a second and looks around. “The snow.” He grins and you roll your eyes. There was happy tears spilling out of your eyes and you lock your lips with him again.

“I love you Joe Burrow.” You say in between kisses and he was whole again. You were right where you should be. With him. “Now get back out there and win this game!”

Joe gently sits you back down. He gives you another passionate kiss before rushing back to the field to finish what he started. His teammates were going to give him hell and back for his actions tonight. You could see it in their faces and the way they looked at each other. However, they were happy to see that smile on their quarterbacks face again.

AFC Champions sounded better now that Joe had his girl back. His best friend in the entire world was his.

[allgirlsareprincesses]

Do you think that Rey's story (excluding episode 9 'cause that was a shitshow) could be interpreted as a Cinderella/Ash girl story?

I hope you realize asking me this is like throwing chum to a shark 😈. But the short answer is yes, to a point.

The long answer is more complicated, so to begin with, let's consult the Cinderella bible:

According to the Aarne Thompson Uther Index, there are five primary motifs to a Cinderella tale:

Persecuted heroine, usually by family

Help or helper, usually magic

Meeting the prince, usually with true identity disguised

Identification or penetration of disguise, usually by means of an object

Marriage to the prince

Rey is abandoned by her family, which is a form of persecution, and harassed by the inhabitants of Jakku like Unkar Plutt. Thus she clearly fulfills the first item.

As for meeting a helper, there are several for her, including Han Solo, Maz, Luke, and Leia. Any or all of these may be considered fairy godparents in the way that they offer her wisdom and material help. Further, except for Maz, they all die in the course of the story, which is consistent with many Cinderella tales in which the helper dies and their bones continue to offer wisdom and comfort to the heroine.

Next, meeting the prince. I mean

To the extent that Rey is "in disguise' here, it would be the extent of her force powers, her destiny as Ben Solo's dyad mate, and her role as the heir apparent to the Jedi (chosen by the Force to wield the legacy saber), all of which are obscured from Kylo Ren when he discovers her in the forest. Further, she is grimy and covered in desert sand, similar to how Cinderella is smeared with ashes that hide her true beauty.

So now an object penetrates the disguise. This is obviously the Skywalker lightsaber, which reveals Rey to be everything listed above, especially when she calls it to her on Starkiller Base, and again when she wields it on Ahch-to.

And lastly, marriage to the prince. As many others have pointed out over the years, Rey and Ben have almost too many symbolic marriages to count in the course of the sequel trilogy. They're extremely married, the Force said so.

BUT WAIT! Go back and look at that list again. Who ELSE fits all those criteria?

It's our boy! Consider:

He is indeed persecuted by family, most notably when Luke momentarily considers killing him.

Ben's helpers are both dark and light, as Snoke/Palpatine guide him in the dark while Luke guides him in the light (poorly). But note again what I said above about the bones of the mentor continuing to offer guidance and comfort after their death. Who should appear at Ben's lowest hour but his departed father, Han Solo? With a message of love, acceptance, and encouragement, Han's memory (because in fairy tales, bones contain memory) encourages Ben to at last cast off his beastly skin and become who he always was.

Next, meeting the prince/ss in disguise. He's wearing a literal mask when he meets Rey, so yeah.

An object penetrates the disguise? Rey slashed his face with the legacy saber, thus symbolically peeling away his mask. And I've argued before that the stabbing in TROS (which I still HATE, btw) is another cutting or burning away of the beastly skin.

And lastly, marriage to the prince/ss. As previously stated, that happened. Many times.

So yes, the Sequel Trilogy can definitely be considered a Cinderella story, with but one glaring issue: Cinderella's husband usually doesn't die at the end. But that's another topic that's been done to death, so let's all just read some more fanfic and forget about it. 👑 Thank you for the ask, this was fun!

[wish-incorrect-quotes]

I’ve seen a few people mention how much Simon looks like he could be the son of these two, and while I don’t know if the timelines work enough for it to be possible, it’s a fun concept just to think about. So here’s some ideas I had about how it might play out:

Basically, Lady Tremaine spends awhile hoping that Anastasia’s whole “falling in love with a commoner” thing is just a temporary inconvenience, and eventually she’ll be able to push her daughter into a more respectable marriage with a proper nobleman. But as soon as she finds out the baker proposed and Anastasia accepted, Tremaine pretty much immediately disowns her, and Anastasia loses her access to the family title and money.

By this point, Cinderella and Anastasia have a much better relationship, so Cinderella offers to use her newfound royal status and try to undo Lady Tremaine’s decision, but Anastasia ends up telling her not to bother. The more time she spends with the baker, the more she finds herself enjoying the simple life. Even if she now has to worry about earning a living, it’s amazing how much easier life feels when she doesn’t have to face her mother’s pressure and expectations, or go through royal balls where she's expected to be better than everyone else but always seems to fall short. Just peaceful days, helping her husband bake bread in the little village where people are always kind and friendly. And before they know it, the two of them are welcoming a baby boy into the world, who’s nearly the spitting image of his father, but with his mother’s red hair and his grandmother’s green eyes. Not that Lady Tremaine has any interest in meeting the boy, if Anastasia would even allow it.

As Simon grows up, he eventually gets curious about how his parents met. Anastasia can be a bit overprotective, and she tries to leave out the most unpleasant parts, but she’s happy to tell him all about how she loves her new home and family so much that she’s never regretted leaving behind a life of luxury for them. Simon, however, can’t help but think that the story sounds unfair. It’s not that he really cares about having a title or attending fancy balls, but it doesn’t seem right to him that his mother had to lose everything because of who she loved.

Eventually, this leads to Simon getting his heart set on becoming a knight, because it’s about the only way someone can work their way into a more “noble” rank. And if his mother has a knight for a son, it could get them all a lot closer to the life she had before. He doesn’t mention why he’s so keen on knighthood, since he doesn’t want his parents to feel guilty and tell him not to go through so much trouble for their sakes, so they figure it’s his own dream and do what they can to support him. But the problem is, he’s not any good at it. He has plenty of strength, but he’s very much a gentle soul, and when his heart isn’t in it, he just can’t seem to develop any talent with a sword and shield.

He’s discouraged for awhile, until he starts hearing rumors of a foreign kingdom with a sorcerer king that can instantly give people what they wish for. And since he isn’t getting anywhere on his own, he starts to become more and more convinced that this is his only chance. He knows how much his parents love their bakery, so he tells them he wants to try striking out on his own for awhile now that he’s getting older. Anastasia and the baker are both more than a little worried about the thought of their son going off to find work somewhere far away from them, but Anastasia remembers what it was like having a controlling mother who didn’t care about her own dreams, so she decides they should let him go if this is what he wants.

So Simon sails to Rosas and soon finds work in the castle, hoping that maybe working close to the king will help his wish get granted faster once he’s old enough to give it away. Thought he finds out before long that things might not go quite as smoothly as he expected based on the stories he heard. There’s a lot more people who have been waiting a long time than he expected. But everyone’s always praising the king, so if he's enough of a good and loyal citizen, surely he'll get his wish granted, right? Plus, he’s been making some great friends in the castle, and he enjoys being able to put in a good day’s work with them, so he can’t complain.

Then he reaches his eighteenth birthday, eagerly gives the king his long-awaited wish, and… is he supposed to feel this tired all the time? Everyone always talks about how wonderful it is, how it’s a real weight off. But he doesn’t feel lighter, he feels like his eyes are always heavy, and he's too exhausted to even feel like himself most of the time.

And then that’s how we get to the events of the movie. I guess Magnifico’s lucky that Simon wouldn’t want to worry his parents and would keep sending letters making it sound like everything was fine. Because Anastasia might have softened over the years, but she definitely still has a temper, not to mention a royal stepsister to turn to, and I’m sure she wouldn’t just take it quietly if she learned some distant king had caused her beloved son to lose all his energy and joy for life.

[super-who-locked-me-in-here]

WIP Tag Game

Thank you @det395 for the tag!

Rules: post the names of all the files in your wip folder regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! and then tag as many people as you have wips.

Also just heads up like all but 2 of these are explicit/18+ so you've been warned

Hannibal:

Face the Music - Angst fic - hannibal

CUMbersome - Pregnant Hannibal/Will omegaverse

Friends with (Tax) Benefits - Beverly/Will (FWB) + Hannibal/Will

You Say You're Observing, But This, This Is Participation - Antony/Will + Bedelia/Hannibal + Will/Hannibal

Yakimono Omegaverse

Jack Walks In

Post-fall Woundfucking

Hannibal/Will (Nude Sketching/Cock Cage)

Fiction Short Story - Hannigram different 1st meeting (BSHCI)

Teacher Will/Human Furniture Hannibal

Will/Hannibal (Hannibal walks in on Will jerking off based on @stab-of-hunger 's art)

Hannibal Extended Universe

Will/Nigel (Roleplay)

MurderDogs Omegaverse

Sub Duncan/Dom Adam (Phone Sex + Daddy Kink)

Duncan/Exhibitionist Adam

Alpha Duncan/Omega Adam (Rut)

Duncan x Trans Masc Reader (Pampering Duncan)

Merlin

Another Merlin Magic Revealed Fic

Dream Daddy: The Dad Dating Simulator

The Resident Shark and the Bad Beat Dad

Cinderella Phenomenon

The Birthday Tryst - Klaude x Lucette

Now that I've laid my soul bare, I guess I get to tag 20 people, so here goes:

@long-in-the-tooth @the-other-will-graham @its-the-ratdawg @honeygrahambitch @stranded-labyrinth @lectercunt @petrowriting @suchawrathfullamb @sourweather @devereauxsdisease @valentinsylve @louhetar @sailorbowie @mothstardust @ear-motif @willgrahamsbecoming @saint-hannibal @frumious-bandersnatch-ao3 @cannibaltranssexual @bloody-hands-motif and I suppose anyone who wants to do the challenge too!

I'll be awaiting my fellow freaks in the confessional booth teehee

[thewhumpyprintingpress]

Call for Submissions: Once Upon A Blade

Calling all whump writers! The Whumpy Printing Press is looking for stories for its second anthology, Once Upon A Blade, to be published in paperback and ebook formats in 2023.  

Theme: Fairy Tales and Myths with a Whumpy Twist. Fairy tales and mythology are no joke when it comes to whump. From Cinderella’s sisters cutting off pieces of their own feet to Sleeping Beauty’s prince being blinded by thorns, fairy tales can be intense. For this anthology, we are looking for your whumpiest take on a beloved fairy tale (or tales) or myth.

The anthology will have three parts. Part 1 will be stories based on mythology. Part 2 will be stories based on folk lore. Part 3 will be stories based on more “modern” fairy tales, like Alice in Wonderland, The Wizard of Oz, or Peter Pan. 

Word Count: Up to 17,500 words

For this anthology, we are looking for stories in the following categories:

Micro-fiction: 250 words or less

Flash fiction: 251-1,000 words

Short Story: 1,001-7,499 words

Novelette: 7,500-17,500 words 

Compensation: ebook contributor’s copy

All proceeds from the sale of this book will be donated to charity.

Submissions Open: March 1, 2023

Submissions Close: March 31, 2023

Expected Publication Date: October 2023

The Nitty-Gritty

Simultaneous submissions: Allowed, but let us know immediately if your story is accepted somewhere else.

Multiple Submissions: One per category. So for example, you can submit a short story and a micro fiction but you can’t submit two micro fictions. 

Reprints: Allowed, but please indicate where your story was originally published. This includes if your story was originally posted on AO3 or Tumblr!

Rights: Nonexclusive worldwide electronic and print rights. All copyright remains with the author. A simple contract will be provided.

Compensation: One ebook contributor’s copy.

Submissions are open to residents of any country.

You must be 18 or older to submit.

Absolutely NO animal whump (shifters are okay). If you want to submit minor whump, please send us a DM first so that we can discuss what your story involves.  

No fanfiction, for legal reasons. (exception: works in the public domain, like Grimm’s or Andersen’s fairy tales)

Formatting: Please submit your story as a Microsoft word document with 12pt, Times New Roman font, double-spaced. Indicate scene breaks with ###.  

Edits: Stories will be lightly edited for spelling and grammar. The content of the story will not be changed, and all edits will be sent to you for approval.

[grailfinders]

Grailfinders #326: Elisabeth Bathory (Cinderella)

last but certainly not least, the leading lady herself, Elisabeth Bathory (Cinderella)! this sidney princess is a Lore Bard to grab the various princess powers we need from reading a metric ton of faerie tales, and she’s also a Cavalier Fighter to get herself some riding skills and her snow white protection.

check out her build breakdown below the cut, or her character sheet over here!

next up: let me put myself in your shoes as a puppet loosely strung…

Ancestry & Background

everything else is pretty similar to the base Eli-chan, but we finally have one of her builds coming out after that big dragonborn update, giving us access to the Gem Dragonborn! with this new subrace, we gain access to all sorts of fun new breath weapons, but as a Sapphire dragonborn you can use a Breath Weapon that deals thunder damage! that’s right, Eli’s singing is a natively supported part of the ancestry now! this attack replaces one of your regular attacks, and you can use it proficiency times a day. you also have Draconic Resistance to thunder damage, and you can share secrets with your allies via your Psionic Mind, letting you speak telepathically with anyone within 30’ of you. also, at fifth level you can take Gem Flight for a minute per day. it’s not much, but it should help you up Castle Csejte Pyramid Himeji.

with how perfectly this subrace fits her, it’s a shame this doesn’t match her usual red scales. at least it matches the dress, right?

oh, almost forgot- you have +2 Dexterity and +1 Charisma.

you’re still a Noble though, so that’s proficiency in History and Persuasion.

Ability Scores

your scores, wildly enough, ended up exactly the same as the original- your Charisma is the highest, followed by your Dexterity, Strength, Constitution, Intelligence, and finally Wisdom is in last. you had to be reminded how to beat the final boss, that’s pretty embarrassing ngl.

Class Levels

1. Bard 1: I’m pretty sure starting as fighter is the smarter moooove, but the muuusic caalllls to meeee! it gives you proficiency in Dexterity and Charisma saves, plus some in Acrobatics to daance, Performance to siiing, and Animal Handling. that last one isn’t music-based, but just to fit the faerie-tale princess aesthetic. they always have birds or cute mice around them, y’know?

you also start off with a little Bardic Inspiration you can give allies Charisma Modifier times a day. they’re d6s you can give an ally to boost one of their attacks, saves, or checks for a short while afterwards. you can also cast Spells using your Charisma!

for cantrips, grab Dancing Lights mostly for the name (but every idol needs good lighting for photos), and Mending to make glass slippers a halfway decent idea. for your spells, Heroism and Bane will allow your singing to empower your allies or weaken your enemies respectively, while Command helps you act more princessly, and Speak with Animals will help you negotiate with the local critters for your photo shoots.

2. Bard 2: second level bards are Jacks of All Trades, adding half your proficiency bonus to all your checks that it wouldn’t usually be added to. you’re the protagonist, dangit! you have to be good at everything!

you can also cast a Song of Rest over a short rest, adding a d6 to your party’s healing.

if you’d rather your singing do the exact opposite, Thunderwave can help you with that. blast people and items back, it’s fun!

3. Bard 3: at third level you’ve read enough faerie tales to become a Lore bard, giving you proficiency in Athletics, Nature, and Survival! I guess hanging out with the seven hotties is rubbing off on you?

ew, that could’ve been phrased better.

speaking of better, you have Expertise in two skills now, doubling your proficiency bonus for Performance and Acrobatics checks.

you can also use some Cutting Words to reduce an enemy’s attack, check, or damage, reacting and spending inspiration to reduce their roll.

finally, you can cast second level spells! I’m pretty sure it was the ass-kicking that freed the other seven hotties from mind control, but it might’ve also been you casting Calm Emotions! maybe!

4. Bard 4: use your first Ability Score Improvement to bump up your Charisma! you use it for all your spells, so it only makes sense to make it better.

you also get another cantrip this level, Thunderclap, and a new spell! now you’ll be able to dance through the danger easily with a quick Kinetic Jaunt!

5. bard 5: yeah you get your gem flight this level, but you can also make bigger inspiration with d8s, and you’re a font of inspiration, so they recharge on short rests instead of long ones!

you can also cast third level spells like fast friends, so now even your enemies will join in your dance numbers! as long as it won’t kill them. sorry, the torture scene will have to wait.

6. bard 6: sixth level bards have countercharm, which you actually use for once! you can spend an action to give people advantage on saves to break out of charming stuff! you also get additional magical secrets (weirdly enough, before regular magical secrets), giving you two extra spells you can learn form any spell list, not just bard! conjure barrage will help you fire off your fingies for your quick attacks, and conjure animals is the best we can do for your dwarves. sorry, we need the higher level spell slots for other stuff!

also, you can give a motivational speech now! yaaaay! that means your party gets temporary hp, and as long as that hp remains they have advantage on wisdom saves and retaliatory attacks!

7. fighter 1: bouncing over to fighter gives you a fighting style, and dueling will give your glass slippers a little more oomph! yeah, we’re calling those daggers here, sorry. still, with this fighting style you get an extra 2 damage each attack!

also, you can use your bonus action to gather a second wind for some more health between short rests! princesses never give up, right?

8. fighter 2: second level fighters can make an action surge once per short rest so you can action while you action! its kind of like quickened spell, but you can use two levelled spells or even do non-spell stuff. fighters- they’re sorcerers but better.

9. fighter 3: at third level you become a cavalier, gaining proficiency in insight bc it’s the only option left for you. you’re also born to the saddle so you can’t get knocked out of your carriage that easily, and if you fall less than 10 feet you land on your feet. also, getting onto or off your carriage only takes five feet. as for getting the carriage? good luck! better find a fairy godmother!

(you can also place an unwavering mark on a creature you hit, and then for the next round they have disadvantage to hit anyone else. if they hurt someone else anyway, you can make a special attack on your next turn as a bonus action, it’s made with advantage and you deal extra damage too! it’s not very eli-y though)

10. fighter 4: use your first asi (as a fighter) to bump up your dexterity for a higher ac and better glass slipper attacks.

11. fighter 5: fifth level fighters get an extra attack each action. you have two feet, probably. yep, that’s all i got this level.

12. fighter 6: sixth level fighters get a bonus asi, so now your dexterity is all maxed out. your footsie game? absolutely legendary.

13. Fighter 7: a seventh level cavalier can make a Warding Maneuver as a reaction to block an incoming attack against anyone within five feet of you. this plus the disadvantage is the closest we’re getting to true invulnerability in this build, but it does add a d8 to the defender’s AC, which isn’t something to sneeze at. you can only use this once per long rest at the moment, but that one attack can be a game changer if you time it right.

14. Fighter 8: one last level of fighter for now gets you another ASI, so bump up that Constitution. now you get plenty more HP to work with, and you have an extra warding maneuver each day.

15. Bard 7: seventh level bards get fourth level spells. Confusion is really just the general vibe of Halloween events these days, but being able to direct that on your enemies is nice.

16. Bard 8: eighth level bards get one more ASI, so bump up your Charisma to the maximum for the strongest musical numbers possible! you can also Charm Monsters now. you’d probably have to use this to keep the gudemon sitting still long enough to headbutt it back to normal.

17. Bard 9: ninth level bards have a stronger song of rest, plus access to fifth level spells! healing a forest? you need Greater Restoration! or maybe a spell we’ll get next level. still, it’ll definitely work on deerlet.

18. Bard 10: the tenth level of bard is mostly just getting better at stuff we already do. bigger inspiration, another round of expertise in animal handling and persuasion, and another round of magical secrets!

while it’s not a new feature, magical secrets are always fun to get, especially since yours are Hallow to clear up that forest and Immolation to finally fire off your NP! yeah, it’s pretty brutal. if your target fails their dex save they take a bunch of damage and they keep taking damage for up to a minute, taking even more damage every time they fail their secondary saves. the spells can’t be extinguished otherwise, and if they die from that damage they don’t even leave a corpse.

19. Bard 11: we don’t really quote unquote “need’ a sixth level spell for this build, but we can’t let your fighter level get too much higher, so Otto’s Irresistible Dance is a fun addition to your repertoire. make someone dance so much they can’t move, and they can only make a save at the end of their turn, so it’s guaranteed to work for at least one turn.

20. Fighter 9: was also don’t want you to get too bardy either, so- last level is fighter. you become Indomitable, so you can reroll a failed save once a short rest. princesses aren’t supposed to be set on fire, so make sure you make those dexterity saves!

Pros & Cons:

Pros:

flight is never not useful. I’ve been over this again and again, but flying instantly nullifies the threat of a majority of enemies in D&D, especially for a spellcaster. it’s also just really cool, I’m glad wotc added the gem dragonborn.

you can do a little bit of everything, both in and out of combat, with good melee fighting skills and ac blending with your buffing, debuffing, and direct damage spells, as well as Jack of All Trades giving you at least half proficiency in literally everything.

fighter/caster is a great multiclass, helping you pump out spells super quickly.

Cons:

while the extra health and action surge from fighter are cool, your cavalier abilities have their usability tied to your strength and constitution, and you may have noticed neither of which are good, so unless you bought a carriage or horse at some point it’s mostly like you just don’t have a subclass. not fun.

also, while daggers are almost certainly the best replacement for sharpened slippers, they’re still the worst finesse weapon you could be using. just grab a rapier or something.

we never picked up mage armor anywhere, so your AC is left wanting. we maxed out your dexterity, so it isn’t bad, but you’d definitely want leather or something if you’re planning on using your slippers.

[sleepingdeath-light]

relationship hcs ; lady tremaine

requested by ; anonymous (28/05/23)

fandom(s) ; disney animated films / cinderella

fandom masterlist(s) ; here

character(s) ; lady tremaine

outline ; “Since I really liked the smut hcs, can I also request sfw relationship hcs with Mother Gothel, Lady Tremaine, Maleficent, and Queen Elinor when you get the chance, please? Thank you (✿◠ᴗ◠)”

warning(s) ; none, just fluff!

she’s incredibly spoiled and has been all of her life — so she expects nothing short of being waited on hand and foot by you and/or your staff

that being said she does care about you as her partner and makes that much as clear as she can within the limits of social propriety — she’s always holding onto your arm, she always addresses you directly and she always refers to you as ‘my love’ or ‘my dear’, but that’s as far as she’ll go publicly

she has an excellent memory when it comes to the things you love or desire which makes her an incredible and thoughtful gift giver — she also keeps track of any appointments, birthdays, holidays and other important information and sets up reminders so you never fall short or forget anything

she’s incredibly protective of you and incredibly spiteful, but she will never directly attack someone — rather she’ll make full use of her status and reputation to work the rumour mill, slowly but surely eroding the offending party’s reputation until they have no choice but to leave your town

whilst she tends to mix and match her wide array of jewellery based on whatever outfit she’s wearing, she always wears a long-chained locket no matter the setting or circumstance — it has a picture of the two of you from your wedding day on it and she vehemently refuses to take it off unless it’s absolutely necessary (such as when she’s bathing)

feigns disinterest when you talk about anything beyond the household (such as your hobbies and interests), but she somehow always asks the right questions and always knows exactly what materials you need to pursue them anyway

so, yeah, acts of service is 100% her love language and anything else other than quality time is going to be something she struggles with — her upbringing was incredibly restrictive, as was expected of the era, so compliments and physical affection don’t just come naturally to lady tremaine as they might others

always kisses you on the cheek before you leave the house, making you promise to come home safe — that’s the closest you’ll get to a major show of affection from her

[w4nderingdreamer]

Who's dreams have you wandered lately and how weird were they ?

We, the Wanderer, traverse many a realm, bringing peace and quiet to the dreams of others.

Be it that of a child or an elder, as we wander off in the depts of Sleep ourselves, we are naturally drawn towards the inner realms of others.

Be it helping a small girl in her own little cinderella ball, who never could wear a dress because no one else knows she's a girl.

Or perhaps helping making the dream of a little boy a escape that he does not get in his house.

Even reuniting an old lady with her long lost lover, even if for a fleeting dream.

For we the Wanderers forsake our rest to grant it to others who oh so desperately need it.

ok i have no clue why i randomly got inspired to write a short snippet but here we are

it's actually mildly based off of one of the stories i want to eventually turn into a comic or smth

smh must be the power of the Muses :3

[patheticbatman]

Part One

I’m very proud of these dolls, and I’m also leaving them at my parents’ house, so I did a little photoshoot with some books as background so I can have nice pictures of them.

Each book is one that is based on their fairy tale, they exist in some form in that universe, or I genuinely think that character would read it. It cannot be their origin book.

Also, they ALL have to be books I have read. If the other books are more like companion books though, then I disregard that rule. They cannot share series either.

First up is Snow White with Fairest, by Gail Carson Levine. Funnily enough, I read this book before Ella Enchanted. I love it though! I always remember the singing and weird-reading-to-make-the-audience-laugh game :).

Second is Cinderella with Cinderella is Dead, by Kaylynn Bayron, and a little toy dog, because the Disney version has a dog. It’s a wonderfully revolutionary and queer take on a world that supposedly worships Cinderella, but actually uses her memory as an oppressive tool. Like an unwilling martyr.

Third is Alice with After Alice by Gregory Maguire (the dude who wrote Wicked). I have other Alice in Wonderland adaptions, but I haven’t enjoyed the others like this one. If you like ratfics, you may enjoy After Alice.

Fourth is Wendy with Peter and the Sword of Mercy, by Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson. I debated on whether to do the first book of this series or not, but Wendy only appears in this book, so I leaned toward this one instead. Out of all my Peter Pan adaption books, I like my one about Hook as a boy in Eton best. But only Wendy’s dad appears in that, and I don’t think she would read it, so I went with this series instead. I wrote a book report about the story set in the desert Kingdom when I was like 9, I loved it a lot.

Fifth is Aurora with While Beauty Sleeps, by Elizabeth Blackwell. It’s an inventive take that I enjoyed quite a bit. Explores how expectations can be used in your favor, etc.

Sixth is Eilonwy, with The Princess, The Crone and the Dung-Cart Knight, by Gerald Morris. I know The Black Cauldron is based on a book series, but I’ve only read a snippet, and I don’t have a copy of any of the stories anyway. So she gets to have a late - Arthurian novel.

Seventh is Ariel (she has six sisters so this pleases me) with The Hothouse Princesses by S. A. Hemstock. The author wrote some of the best Steven Universe fanfic, so I bought her first published story when it came out. Idk how it isn’t a bigger hit - it’s about a princess who was raised by peasants, gets discovered, wants to go back, and instead gets shunted off to a misogynistic, colonialistic, colorist princess finishing school, where she finds out some serious conspiracy shit about fairy godmothers. Anyway, Ariel often felt oppressed by her dad and curious about the Human world, so I imagine it would catch her eye.

Eighth is Belle with Lindworm, by Jenny Prater. Coincidentally, this is another case of me reading a superb fanfic writer’s work (Batfam this time) and instantly snapping up their OG work. I have a book of short stories that had a more direct BATB parallel story, but I was trying to stick with Novels. In any case, this is the story of the maiden who married the Lindworm, and what the Royal family does once they have to reckon with the nations of the dead princesses.

Ninth is Jasmine with the School for Good and Evil, by Soman Chainini. Her character really only appears in the prequel, but I wanted to acknowledge this really great series properly. I read the entire thing this summer, and I love its thematic approaches. In any case, I feel like this series’ approach to beauty, freedom and other dichotomies would pique her interest.

Tenth, we have Gabriella (Ariel’s mermaid BFF) and her Sign Language interpreter Olly. I have her human form. Anyway, I decided she might enjoy Wonderstruck, by Brian Selznick. It has Deaf characters and lots to show about the Human World, which I supposed she might enjoy. I found it quite interesting as a kid, and like with all the other Selznick books I own, I used to color all the hair, clothes and eyes in, lol. Listen. I had a lot of time on my hand and consistent access to Sharpies XD.

I’ll link the other parts to here when I post them!

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

[geraskierbrainrot]

This is a collection of stories based off classic fairy tales or featuring heavy fairy tale elements

A Marvelous Night for a Moondance by @flowercrown-bard | T | 1k

There was a warning every child living near Oakwood Valley knew. "Don't go out at night, or you'll disturb the Moonlit Dancer." No one truly knew who the Moonlit Dancer was, but everyone agreed on two things: The Dancer must be dangerous. And he must be oh so lonely.

so can we pretend, sweetly by @redjewelsforeyes | T | 2k

Jaskier is a regular human bard, and Geralt could swear that yesterday he’d had regular human teeth. They’re just a little bit too long for his mouth, now- too white, too sharp. A predator’s. Jaskier clicks them together, experimentally, and winces when he bites his tongue. “Fuck anyone you weren’t supposed to?”  “I don’t fuck anyone I’m supposed to,” Jaskier says, a little proudly.

the gleam in your eyes by @dear-galileo | G | 3k

jaskier's been cursed to fall asleep every time geralt is not touching him. they try to make it work.

Like a Flower of Gold by @kimikocha | M | 5k

When Jaskier sets out to visit an ancient castle reputed to belong to a legendary Beast, he assumes the place will be abandoned. The Beast, after all, is a children's tale. But then, so are the healing powers granted certain people by the magical sundrop flower, and Jaskier himself is anything but a children's tale. The castle he finds is less abandoned than he thinks, and it turns out that the Beast might not be so mythical after all.

Petals All Plucked by @rebrandedbard | G | 10k

Poppy, Lily, Aster, Rose Ask them not where true love grows Nothing lost or gained by those Ask the daisy stem who knows When Jaskier inadvertently breaks the heart of a witch in his youth, she curses him with a blessing that whenever he plucks a daisy's petals, it will decide his love until the day he finds a love that is true. All his years, Jaskier never realizes that the blessing is a curse, manipulating the content of those hearts he seeks to know. When he meets Geralt, the temptation to ask the daisies grows stronger and stronger ...

Once Upon a Wine by @inexplicifics and @bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher | T | 10k

Yennefer is very tired of Jaskier and Geralt pining at each other, and after a little too much wine, the solution seems obvious: a curse that can only be broken by true love's kiss. Geralt and Jaskier would just like to know why their lives have suddenly gotten so very strange.

a dream is a wish the heart makes by @dear-galileo | T | 12k

the last thing geralt had expected to do was meet a prince in the woods. no- the last thing that geralt expected to do was fall in love with the prince, and make a deal with a witch to see him again. (cinderella witcher retelling)

home is nowhere, therefore you by @et-in-arkadia | E | 18k

"Right, well," Jaskier says, when he halts before Geralt. Up close, he looks much more nervous. There is sweat on his brow and his collar is damp with it, and his teeth keep catching on his lower lip. "True love's kiss. There's—ah—there's nothing to it." And he bends, the utter imbecile, and kisses Geralt full on the mouth.

Tale as Old as Time by @goodheavensgwen | E | 25k

Fresh out of Oxenfurt and beginning his bardic career, Jaskier yearns for adventure. Following the whispers of a story, he finds himself in a crumbling old keep inhabited by an odd yet delightful group of enchanted furniture. As Jaskier celebrates finally finding something worthy of a song, his joy is cut short when a giant wolf-like beast emerges, thunderously forbidding Jaskier from ever leaving. Now trapped in a strange enchanted castle, Jaskier finds himself growing closer and closer to its inhabitants, including the mysterious beast, who may not be as monstrous as Jaskier first thought. Will love break the curse, or are things more complicated than they seem? After all… who could ever learn to love a beast?

The Spectre's Wreath by @rebrandedbard | M | 28k

Geralt is wrongfully hired to dispose of a vengeful spectre that haunts a lake, only to discover it is the town's unknown guardian and the very spirit of Yule itself. Yule curses Geralt with a wreath atop his head. If he does not receive a kiss before the lake thaws in spring, he will turn to ice and die. With the pass to Kaer Morhen closed up, Geralt decides to spend his last winter in Oxenfurt with Jaskier. But it may not be his last after all if Jaskier has anything to say about it.

Show love to all these authors by leaving kudos and comments, and happy reading!

[lovelyjasmari]

I think I asked you this about Rook and Vil ages ago, but I'm wondering, what Disney characters would you ship with some of the Twisted Wonderland boys and why? (With Jamil, I ship him with Cinderella, Jasmine and Moana. Not sure with the male characters.)

Hello! 💙

Alright, so here’s the short version of my answer:

Jamil/Jasmine

Silver/Mulan

Riddle/Elsa or Anna

Leona/Tiana

And for the longer version, look under the cut~

So with Jamil, I also ship him with Jasmine. I can see them having a similar dynamic to the one Jasmine had with Aladdin in the film because they have a lot of similarities. Jamil feels trapped in the circumstances of his birth, he longs to be free and most importantly, to show the world just what he’s capable of and that means improving his social standing. But if I’m being honest, I think Jamil is a little more clever than Aladdin and probably wouldn’t have to resort to constantly lying to keep their relationship. I can see Jamil actually trying to improve his life through legitimate means. It would be on par with how Jafar is in the live-action film, initially being a poor boy who rose to become a statesman. 

I’ve actually never thought of shipping him with Cinderella. I can see it but I’d be curious to hear your reasoning. 

With Silver and Mulan, their values closely align with each other, both are deeply honor-bound people and hold family very dear. I imagine they’d have an immediate respect for each other that would develop into a deeper connection over time. I should note that a lot of my answers are based on which twst character I think has the most similarities to the Disney characters canon partner if they have one. And I see a lot of similarities between Silver and Shang, minus Shang’s more sexist hangups in the first half of the film. 

And after some of the more recent book 7 updates, I’ve come to realize that Silver has similar insecurities as Mulan. He wants to be a good son and retainer but feels unworthy because of his background. And I imagine he probably feels stuck between what he wants for himself and what his destiny could very well have been. I sometimes also wonder if he feels out of place in NRC because he’s been raised away from most other humans and presumably mostly only interacted with fae besides Sebek. With all this in mind, I think Silver and Mulan would be great for each other. 

Now with Riddle it’s a little different because I think he could work with either Elsa or Anna for reasons that are one in the same. Elsa doesn’t have a canon love interest but they still have a lot of similarities. At least in the first film. They’re both very uptight and have had their personalities suffer under their more…ahem…oppressive upbringing. But I think over time, they would get along well. But with Anna, I think her more upbeat personality would help Riddle loosen up over time

With Leona and Tiana, well, this is something I’ve only thought about recently. I was thinking about Naveen and while I think a lot of Leona’s lazy/nonchalant attitude is a result of deep depression, it’s still a lot like Naveen in the first half of Princess and the Frog. I think seeing how determined Tiana is to see her goals through despite her poor means would be a good wake-up call for him. I also think Tiana would see the potential Leona has without having to kiss his ass.

And those are the twst characters I’d ship with Disney characters. At least, the ones I’ve thought about most. I’ve sometimes thought about Deuce and Ariel or Jack with Merida but those are mostly based off vibes. And for the longest time, I thought either Azul or Vil would be better suited with Tiana. But with Vil, I’m more inclined to ship him with either Belle or Rapunzel. And Azul is so underhanded in his business tactics that I don’t think Tiana would have much respect for him.