#big personal art project wish me luck :]

[2tsuuuun2]

[starhrtz]

— 001. ACTING FANTASY

CHAPTER PREMISE — you didn’t expect to be dragged into a mess when you made friends with a certain red headed girl, a simple interview day somehow turned to a chaotic mess.

SERIES PREMISE — after a mysterious death, you find yourself being reborn as an actor's daughter. everything seems to be smooth-sailing in this life before you came across a strange star eyed boy during your junior year in high school. this strange yet fortune encounter leads to a spiral of love yet grief.

CONTAINS — 1.1k+ word count uhh nothinh else i think

A/N — oh em gee first chapter is finally released !!! AND YES I DID MAKE A LOT OF PJSK REFERENCES :')

series masterlist | next

"grades aren't everything-"

Your parents' voice was zoned out as your eyes stared at your report book, your smile faltered as you noticed your grades have been going down and down. What was the point in trying if your grades would always stay so low no matter how much you tried? You were always convinced that you are just like your brother, smart and the best at everything so why does this sheet of paper differ from what you heard throughout your life? Why were you third in your class, you have always been at the top so why are you dropping all of a sudden? You still remembered clearly, the two classmates snickering and smirking at you proudly showing off their grades. They…don't deserve it, your teeth were gritted as you walked home.

Why was it them who were at the top? None of their work was as good as yours, their grammar and sentence structure needed work… right? Oh, how you hated their grins, you could tell by their faces that they knew you hated losing especially coming in third place but they also knew that you suspected them of using their parent's money to bribe the school. What kind of school is this? Letting people bribe the school staff just so they could be at the top? What a bunch of spoiled-

"Hinomori, are you alright?"

A voice snapped you out of your train of thought, you took a deep breath before looking over to your new friend and potential classmate. (name) hinomori was the new identity you yield after the incident, that grin that they had on their face… It reminded you of your classmates. You haven't told anyone about your reincarnation, your family not your group mates after all they'll most likely call you crazy or just laugh it off thinking it was a joke. Reincarnation… was a silly thing if you had to be honest, perhaps the fate you suffered from really was a cruel one? You plastered on a reassuring smile and looked at the red-haired girl.

"Mhm just slightly nervous about the interview that's all, but you do know you could call me by my first name.. Kana."

"Y-yeah, I know I'm just not used to it that's all! I am a big fan of your work too…"

Kana exclaimed while whispering the last part which you slightly laughed at before Kana was called to the interview room. Yota high school was one of the few schools which had a performing arts program, though it was only eligible to people affiliated with a company it did make you feel grateful you and your friends were scouted not long ago by SEKAI productions due to their recent project wanting groups with different personalities to make a debut under their name yet the company was far from sketchy. All the staff and idols were always welcoming to new debuts, even going as far as a small party.

You looked out the window as you waited your turn, it disappointed you that none of the other members of A✩𝖱𝖠 came to this school so sadly you were alone in this school… You sighed before hearing your name being called out by one of the interviewers, Kana gave you a confident smile and a thumbs up wishing you good luck. You smiled and gave her a quick wink as you walked into the performing arts room, you shouldn't show any signs of fear or hesitation that was one of the things your parents taught you whenever they made you go for auditions.

"I'm (name) Hinomori, affiliated with SEKAI Productions."

. . . . . . . . . . . .

As you walked out of the interview room, you breathed a sigh of relief. Perhaps you should ask Airi to make the choreography a little easier later, though you knew you most likely aced the interview judging by the interviewer's faces alone. You sighed as you walked the empty hallways,though you were rather happy about being born into such a successful life it still sort of upsets you when you had to attend high school again after all your senior year was where your grades started going downhill…

“WHAT THE HECK!!?!”

Kana’s shrieking could be heard from further down the hall way. Yet when you reached there you saw Kana along with two other people who you don’t reconsider, but judging by Kana’s face they might be her friends..?

“I’LL BULLY YOU, I REALLY WIL-“

“Kana, there you are!”

You exclaimed walking up to the trio, while the blonde boy seemed to be confused on who you are yet the girl who you assumed to be his sister seems to be starstrucked? Their eyes… were pretty. That was the first thing that came to your mind as you got a better view of how they look, you snapped out of your thoughts before looking back at Kana.

“I didn’t want to be the crying girl’s junior but if it means that Hinomori could be my senior, I’ll gladly endure her whining!”

“Hey I got ears, ya’know!”

You muffled a giggle as you watched the two argue, was the brother too used to this type of situation? It looked like the two weren’t going to stop arguing anytime soon, you sighed and looked at the blonde boy who seemed rather deep in thought.

“Wait, have you worked with Gotanda Taishi before? I think I saw you once in his films…”

You looked up with them and nervously smiled, even when your parents were actors somehow… it didn’t suit right you or perhaps it made you slightly cringed whenever you watched clips of yourself acting though it was most likely the latter if you had to be honest, yet even when you told your parents about your decision to quit acting they weren’t upset. Sure, in their eyes there was disappointment but it held approval as well perhaps because you made your own choice of career paths at a young age?

“I haven’t heard that name in a while… but yeah I did. Why’d you ask?”

He shrugged his shoulders, after all what was he meant to say? That the director, his boss, used one of your quotes that you had said on tv once to try and motivate him? Of course not, scaring you wasn’t his goal and he was pretty sure Ruby might kill him if he tries and scare you away from them.

“Well, see ya, I’m heading over to the director’s place.”

Somehow, you felt it was directed to you yet it caught Kana’s attention, immediately breaking away from her and Ruby’s petty fight though could it really be considered a fight? “Wait where do you think your going!” Kana shouted running after Aqua, taking your hand and following him. Oh god, what have you dragged yourself into now?

please do reblog or comment if you like this!! It rlly makes me motivated to see positive comments or reblogs w tags!!

➜ TAGLIST: @aranachan @cerisearan @miyakoa @yevene @atomi-mi @bajifairyy @itonashi @lxry-chxn @rymtea @kult-o

[paganposting]

How I Made My Altar

Creating an altar is something that varies a lot by tradition, but this is a guide on how i personally made and maintain mine. Hopefully this is helpful to someone!

Step One- Planning and Sourcing

In my tradition, there isn't necessarily a huge difference in making personal vs deity altars. As I've heard several of my teachers say- an altar is the place in your home where magic is always welcome. if you wish to add to that by including deities that are always welcome or honored in that space, great! if a deity does request their own specific altar, no problem!

The more complicated aspect for me, is that i feel deeply i must be in right relationship with the items on my altar. Part of this is everything being ethically sourced. All things on this table were either found by me, purchased from a small local business I trust, or received as a gift. These items have been accumulated over the last 5 years of my practice. If you are just starting out and feel as i do about sourcing, you might have a lot of arts and crafts projects ahead.

What aspects of your practice you feel are necessary to represent on your altar? Should you have artwork? Plants? Symbols or sigils?

What work will be done at your altar and which tools should be there? Are you doing meditation that requires a nice smelling herb or oil? Will you be doing spells on it that require big empty space?

Step Two- Find or Make Materials

My recommendation if you don't have the budget to buy a specific dedicated table/ shelf for your altar is to clear a space where you feel the most presence of magic in your life. My earliest altars were cleared off spots on bookshelves and in the kitchen.

Now that you have a list of themes or specific items you want on your altar, go on a nature walk and find things that call to you. Whenever I go to new or interesting places, I keep my eyes peeled for things that might be useful in my practice. Don't take too much, and ask permission from the land before leaving with anything. If the item feels oddly heavy as you walk away with it- give it back.

Step Three- Assemble

The main thing i do at my altar is meditate and pray to deities. Because i view this space as my gods' front door, i care a lot about it looking aesthetically pleasing. I am not part of a tradition where it matters what things go on the left or right, the elements are not associated with cardinal directions, and deities aren't really unsatisfied sharing an altar with each other (even if they may not get along in some lore). Because of this, i just lay things out intuitively, aiming for some symmetry. I also prefer to do spells outdoors, so my altar doesn't need to have a workable space beyond a nice spot to charge things.

Do I feel the need for my altar to have directional correspondences?

Is it important to me to optimize aesthetics?

I work a lot with the seasons, and this is meant to have some nice summertime vibes. With the harvest season coming up, i'll definitely redecorate it.

If anyone has questions please let me know

go n-éirí leat! good luck!

[zhongrin]

🎁 ᴢʜᴏɴɢʀɪɴ 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 ᴡʀᴀᴘᴘᴇᴅ 🫶🏻

ー just a little thing i wanted to make as the year ends 💗

𝐁𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐇𝐮𝐛𝐛𝐲 💍

① 👑 zhongli 👑 ✼ best husband, best comfort f/o, best everything. my ultimate blorbo 🧡

② al haitham 🌱 & wriothesley 🐾 ✼ he's such a silly guy. i love him so much. ✼ who's a good puppy! who's the goodest boy! yes you areeee~! <3

ⓧ runner up // neuvillette 🦦 ✼ his en voice almost made me simp. almost. damn you ray chase /lh

𝐅𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐌𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 🎶

ー✼ the ebg back in february and october! so so so so much chaos fun! both took all the creative juices and sleep i had, but it was all so worth it! i got to connect with more people and interactions were off the charts for the whole week. and coviello... my precious babie <3 i'm pretty sure i'll join another ebg next year given the opportunity.... or perhaps even host one, but with a twist-

ー✼ got matched up T W I C E (well, thrice in total) with mr. i am here's alternate universe selves al haitham. thanks @/ansy-tea / @/kopidense 👍🏻 i shall endeavor to make an effort to discombobulate and fool the silly sprout man in 2024 if there are any other matchup events open lmao

ー✼ teyvatweets! it was so much fun compiling everyone's tweets and coding the website hehe it didn't really blow up or anything due to how 'personal' that project was, but i think about it from time to time. such a fun lil thing!

ー✼ that 1 pity c0 al haitham who came right after ayato.... thanks dad for gracing me with your birthday luck 🙏🏻

ー✼ finally treating myself and indulging in all the selfship commissions. i'm grateful i have the ability to indulge and i'm hoping to do the same next year. and the way everyone just gifted me things for my birthday made me feel so so loved. i couldn't celebrate it with anyone since i wasn't at home, and it was on a weekday meaning my friends were all busy - so it felt like a mini-party... truly, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much ;w;

ー✼ personally, i'm super happy and kind of proud of getting very comfortable with sharing my art and improving on it! i used to go back and forth whenever i'm trying to post art, but now i'm confident enough to not think too much about it! naturally i have lots to improve and i'm nowhere near 'good' but that's fine with me! i owe it all to yall's support and lovely comments <3

ー✼ all the anon drabbles and charanons!!!! always such a nice sight to wake up to. they're like surprise gifts whenever i open tumblr because i don't have notifications on, and i adore them so much! big big big shoutout to @/floraldresvi, @/crystalflygeo, and @/soleillunne yall are amazing ;w;

ー✼ all the super sweet messages all of you left in my christmas tree.... i'm cradling all the wishes and silliness and messages from my f/os so close to my heart!! ceo!haitham tho. bruh you're still making me work LEAVE ME ALONE- /silly

ー✼ that zhongli birthday celebration series... they're not much, and even with all posts combined they have way less notes than a random vent drabble i dropped in the middle of it lol but i had lots of fun writing, designing, and inserting all the 'golden threads' across the fics nonetheless!! i'll highlight them later so the people who have been following the little series can go 'OH' lol

𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐏𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 🫂

@ainescribe ❀ @silentmoths ❀ @crystalflygeo ❀ @moraxsthrone ❀ @floraldresvi ❀ @sheepmc ❀ @zhxngii ❀ @localplaguenurse ❀ @mysnowmanandmebaby ❀ @the-travelling-witch ❀ @watatsumiis ❀ @kurikurikurisu ❀ @leftdestiny-posts ❀ @kaeffeinee ❀ @queen-belial ❀ @abyssmal-skies ❀ @dawndelion-winery ❀ @yinyinggie ❀ @silkjade ❀ @dustofthedailylife ❀ @scarasmood

@euniveve ❀ @soleillunne ❀ @faesther ❀ @ansy-tea ❀ @vennnnn-diagram ❀ @navxry ❀ @celestetalkstoomuch ❀ @minhosairfryer ❀ @xeraeus ❀ @pearlywritings ❀ @ryuryuryuyurboat ❀ @mochinon-yah ❀ @asoulsreverie ❀ @xiaosonlybeloved ❀ @mooncreates ❀ @jingyuansbird ❀ @tearskillstardust

i love you all and i'm so so glad to have made a connection with you! be it knowing each other from mutual friends, from a drawing/writing commission, or even if we just stumbled onto each other randomly by pure chance - know that i appreciate you! every single one of you are so talented and so wonderful. thank you for being the threads that shaped the comfy sweater that is 2023 for me <3 ps. and for my former moots who are minors but have respected my boundaries, i'm sorry i didn't tag you but i had fun befriending you lot. my best wishes for you in the years ahead too! pps. some of you might know me from my main @/meimeimeirin instead! i separated the list into 2 paragraphs bc tumblr isn't letting me have that many texts in one block apparently hsldfjsd also, if you're not in the list i either 1) forgot, bc i have the memory of a goldfish, or 2) remembered, but felt like it would be intrusive for me to tag you <- (more likely tbh) 😔

@/jjovin3221, @/starffox, @/syrenkitsune, @/finleyrambles, @/dr-birb, @/smokipoki, @/1117sblog, @/virdiaura, @/lawnfei, @/lady-alexis-salt, @/local-ragamuffin, @/the-knaves-world, @/alhaithams-fanfic-stash, @/interpretpages, @/magicalink, @/starlingcore, @/lyralibra, @/crazyrichdaughter, @/winterhuntsman, @/ladycoleigh, @/bettybeako

ALSO, HUGE SHOUTOUT to the people who frequent my notifs. i can't remember most of yall's handles accurately (and for some of you i remember by your pfp instead hskdhskd) but whenever your username pops up, know that i always go "!!!!!" and my imaginative dog ears perks up and my metaphorical tail just starts thumping on the floor <3 thank you so much for your continuous support!! (and i know some of you wrote in my tree so thank you for that too hehe) note: that wasn't an exhaustive list, but more like the blogs i remember seeing a lot on top of my head!!

𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐌𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞 🧡

thank you for such a lovely 2023! thank you for being here and for always supporting my works, my silliness, and myself as a person. here's to more fun shenanigans ahead, and i hope 2024 will be a year that makes us all a better person <3

ꕥ xmas dividers © cafekitsune

[indieyuugure]

Hey, Indie!!

Your art is amazing and I love your comics! I think what you do is absolutely amazing and can't wait to see what else you bring to the table.

I'm really excited to see what you have in store for your version of tmnt. With that said, I was wondering if you have any advice for other creators currently trying to sort out a version of their own? If you could recommend anything that be great!!

Once again, I love your art and stories and I hope you have a turtle-tastic week!!

Aw, thank you, I’m glad you like my comics ^v^

WRITE DOWN EVERYTHING, whether it be a stupid little doodle on a page or a few lines of text in a Google docs file, just make sure you have all of it! You’ll tell yourself “No-no! I’ll remember!” No you won’t and you’ll be kicking yourself later.

Don’t be afraid to try something wacky and new. The staple of the TMNT franchise is weird craziness! Go total mad scientist, go above and beyond! Maybe even quite literally out of this world!

Write in some references to other iterations. One thing that is very consistent throughout TMNT is the amount that it references itself. As much as people like new stuff, they also want what they already like and so little personality things or design quirks or full plots that reference past versions make a big difference.

Collaboration, while maybe more of an optional thing, can be so much fun and can add so much more life to your stories and characters! They say that no one man can make a pencil, and the same is true for stories. It can be tough to talk about stuff that you made originally (at least it is for me) but once you get comfortable, it’s extremely fun to be able to pass ideas back and forth and make something even cooler and more refined!

HAVE FUN. I know it sound ridiculous, but I’m serious! If you don’t like the designs? You can change them! You don’t like a character or want someone new? You can fix that too! You are in 100% power to change everything and tweak it to your liking, however there is a point at which too much perfection will stress you out and ruin the whole project. Once you see something as a chore, it is extremely hard to unsee it. Even if you never share your ideas with the world, and it’s just a fun project, nothing is more important than having fun.

I hope this was at all helpful. These are the steps I take whenever I’m creating a story and characters. I wish those of your creating your own versions luck!

Good question! :]

[rumble-aint-a-rumble-without-me]

Hii! Do you think you could do soft!Dallas Winston x female reader that likes art (drawing painting sometimes photography) headcanons please? Thank you so much and it’s ok if you don’t want to do it. ❤️

A/N: I wouldn't consider myself an artist, but I did complete an oil painting class once, and I make a lot of little crafts. I'm more into the non-popular forms of art, like photography and crocheting actually, embroidery too. But yeah! I hope you like these, Non!

If you’re into art? Regardless of what medium it may be, you’re gonna have the perfect muse

All it’s gonna do is feed his ego, but please oh please draw/paint/snap pictures of Dally

He’s got a sharp face shape those eyes, regardless if you’re following the Book!Dally or Matt Dillon!Dally

I love both, personally, but y’know, sometimes people have different, opinions, that’s cool too

But back to the art, he’s perfect as a model, if you ignore the part that you’ll probably have to really try to get him to pose for you

But most of the time? You won’t have to, I think he’s just kind of photogenic like that, especially when he wants to be

After posing for so many mugshots, I think he’d appreciate being photographed by someone who actually cares about him, y’know?

I highly suggest just taking photos of Dal when he doesn’t realize it too, I have a feeling he would make some super epic facial expressions and just have the best look on his face

For example, the face he’s making when he tries to light a cigarette and lighter won’t strike, the smile on his face when he’s standing and fooling around with Johnny, the way the corners of his eyes get a little softer whenever he’s looking back at you

If you weren’t taking pictures of him, he’s gonna try and photobomb your pictures or mess with your camera

He thinks he’s being funny, but he’s really just being annoying, I apologize in advance on Dally’s behalf

But hey, there’s a bunch of other things I could go on about, but I’ve got more art mediums to cover-

If you want to paint him….I wish you best of luck, he can be a little whiny and definitely doesn’t have the patience to sit while paint is drying

My suggestion to you is to paint as much of Dally as you can when he’s willing to sit, maybe end up bribing him with a few kisses and the promise of a date or something like that

And when he doesn’t want to sit? Just work on the background

Eventually, he’ll get bored of not having your attention, he can be kinda of needy like that, and he’ll come back, asking if you need him to sit again

If you’re not painting him, maybe you’ve got a school project or just painting for fun, but Dally will constantly pester you about what you’re doing, why you’re doing it that way, why you’re using those colors with that brush

He’s annoying, alright? I don’t know what else to tell you

But he’s very proud of your work. If it’s hung up anyway, he’s very quick to go check it out, even if that means taking a trip back to school and walking through the hallways

If anyone has something to say about your art, they’d better start running <3

If you just like to doodle? Maybe just use pencils, colored or not?

I cannot emphasize enough how sharp Dal’s cheekbones are and how much fun they would be to draw

Just? *waves vaguely to his face* what can’t you love about that?

An artist’s dream, just look at that face and all the juxtaposition-

But yeah!

Draw him, draw on canvas, draw in sketchbooks, draw in the corners of your notebooks, the margins of your papers, Dally will love all of it

If you draw him something, something small, he’ll tuck it into his wallet, I promise

Will he tell you he did that? Probably not, that’s too cheesy for the big, bad Dallas Winston 

But I’m telling you it’s gonna be there, so just trust me on that <3

[chrishoughton]

i have been a big city greens fan from the very beginning and i recently just started rewatching it with my best friend who’s never seen it before. she lives over a thousand miles away in another state and it’s so hard being apart, but every night we get on the phone and watch BCG together through disney+. it has been one of highlights of my weeks lately.

I relate so much to Gloria, more than i wish i did sometimes, as a barista currently trying to make it as an artist and dreaming of going to paris hahaha. I love her.

all of this to say that i am so thankful for big city greens and the characters, it is so real and so funny and such a comfort to me. when BCG came out i had just started art school and it was a huge inspiration and continues to be today as i have grown and learned. my dream was and still is to make something as heartfelt and genuine as BCG one day. I’ve come close to giving up so many times and this year especially has been really difficult in a lot of ways, but rewatching your show has reminded me of what i set out to do in the first place. it has helped me find that motivation again.

thank you and Shane for creating such a gem, you have no idea how much it means to me. I hope you and your family had a wonderful thanksgiving!

(and since this wasn’t a question and you got on me for that last time i sent you a message, I’ll end with this:

what are cricket and tilly’s favorite songs of all time, respectively, and why? I would love to know so i can add them to my big city playlist :’)

thank you again!!)

Oh man, this made my day! Thanks for sharing. It makes me really happy to hear that BCG (and Gloria) is so special to you. I love that you watch it with your friend over the phone. That's adorable??? And it's surreal to hear that BCG is such an inspiration to you because I remember being in art school and wondering the same questions. "Will I ever be able to make something as cool/inspiring/original as ______??"

As cool as it is to be inspired by stuff you like, it can easily become discouraging (at least this is my experience.) Think of all of the artwork/songs/films we've missed out on because artists have talked themselves out of completing their project. Tragic!

It's important to remember that you'll never make anything like BCG (or anything you're inspired by) and that's a good thing! Whatever you create, will go through your individual "filter." It really will be unique because there's no one like you. No one has your exact experiences, perspectives, and outlook on life. Just keep making stuff that feels personal and honest to you and you're bound to make something interesting and unique.

And to answer your question (thank you for finally following the RULES)... Cricket's favorite song would probably be ever-changing depending on his current mood. But I like to think that Gene Autry's "Don't Fence Me In" is quietly playing on loop in the back of Cricket's brain. I could see Tilly loving Mama Cass's "Make Your Own Kind of Music."

Best of luck with the rest of art school!

[metavandetta23]

nobody is going to read this, so I am just gonna put it out there warning: rambling from some fucking guy ever. you have been warned.

life sucks, blah blah blah, but instead of just complaning about that, how about I give you bit explenation as to why. so sit down there one of my 121 followers. If anyone of you read that is and not just clicked follow on one art I made and buzzed off (no offense there, just saying.) Okay so you might ask, why now out of sudden i blow like up that. Here is the answer: See, I have been doing creative stuff like, be it art, writing, music or whatever for past..... lets say 4-5 years. As you might guess, some of these ventures didnt pan out in the end. i mean, its given. It happens. Let me mention some of the things I tried over the years. I tried making a homestuck comic on mspa when I first started doing creative stuff. I managed to get pretty far compared to most projects I will mention, but I didnt finish in the end. Why? I got burned out, because I worked on it full non stop. Then I tried having a cool rp campagin session with pals from discord server I known. That ended in tragedy, especially after one of them out of fucking blue, send a fucking gore of dead person. None of us expected this to happen. Earlier I tried music, couldnt do that thing earlier unless you call "music" by swapping midis with shitty piano font. Well, atleast it didnt end up with a gore.

Then I tried working on some ut aus. Did it even work? HAHAHAHAHAHA, what do you think? Ofcourse, not. Didnt peak interest, because I didnt capture interest basically. Anyways this goes on and on. Deltarune au there, some another rp server there and there (one turned into glorified horny rp out of college setting that I tried initially, pal if you are reading this, sorry but this server just sucked ass) I think you might start seeing a pattern here. You would think eventually. That being "Gee meta, thats sure lot of failures, you must have atleast succed one time BIG right?" Haha, no. Okay I did manage to finish some of my stuff but like. really really low bar stuff. so essentially in the eyes for everyone, nothing. See, most of the failures from these projects came from me doing solo. You would think me teaming up with someone would help? Not really, unless I literally pay them money for it, tough fucking luck. Out of 5 years of me doing creative shit, only 4 people helped me out that I recall. they couldnt helped me out for long in the end, but i appreciated for them when they could. all rest of people? Fucking went ghost and then I was left alone, figuring this shit out myself. It isnt fun knowing that you put trust in someone, only in the end to be alone in this in the end. I wish I was so fucking talented, creative, witty or self efficent as the people i asspire to, the artists i admire who make works of artm writers who can write witty, fun but touching stories. I wish I could be at thier level, so I could make great works of art. But atlas, I am not. I dont seek glory or fame, even if it would be nice. No, I just want people to enjoy creating what I make, to feel like I have impact on the world, that people can share with. to make connections with. Look in the end I am just 20 year old guy from europe, that isnt much good at anything, including social life, apperantly. Only thing I am good at is pixel art, but just barely. I am very much uncreative person. and unconfident and rather hopeless one these days, despite how much I try to hide in fake smiles.

I dont have much better way to end this sort of ramble, besides mentioning tobys recent post from spring newslettter and my view on it. "There's times where it feels like your hopes and dreams are simply slipping away from you. That the things you wanted to achieve are floating away from you in the sky while you lie there, fallen in a crater, your wing torn off, never to grow back. Bitterness grows, and you feel like you may never leave the ground again.

But

That's not true.

You can still fly.

Even if you lose a piece of yourself, even if it feels like you can't get up anymore, you can. You can fly with one wing. You can fly without any wings."

Can you really even fly, even if you feel like a part of yourself was torn off? That it happened right before you could even took off. No matter how much you struggle, scream and rage. You can still never to be able to fly like others, much even take off from ground. No matter how much you try. You feel shackled to ground, to the bones of earth. While you look towards as sky, as other people dance in the air beyond your wildest imagination. Its so beautiful, yet so out of your reach. Cries of helps can be heared coming from you from miles in the air. But they all fall on the deaf ears. Or maybe its just out of bliss ignorance? You cant say. You want to join them, join them so badly. To feel like you could finally be a part of something greater. To feel like you could belong somewhere. To be cared. But you just cant. It wasnt meant to be made. Resentment grows inside your soul. As that feeling rots inside you more and more. Part of you wishes this feeling to be gone, to never be felt. But the other part, says otherwise. It wants that liberty desperately, looking with its green eyes at them. Why they? Why not me. Why not me at all!?. You just want what they have yourself. It grows inside you more and more as you allow it to. You eventually consdering tearning off other people wings. Even if you cant ever fly agian, doesnt mean you should be the only who suffer like this right? And why do they deserve to fly, anyway. They would be better off without that, you think. Plus, even in this state. You know you can do this option. To cripple someone, just to make yourself feel better even if its only for a moment. But then you realise. If you ever would reach to that point. Whatever drive you initally, would be just gone. In fear of your insecurities and weakness. You decide to lie up, instead. Rendering your shackled and vulerable. Locked inside, with no way or out. Perhpas in the end.... Its better if you dont fly at all...

[pbandjesse]

I am so tired right now. I was so social today and while it was nice to have people over, I really could have used a nap.

I went to sleep pretty quickly after I posted last night and I slept pretty well. I wasn't feeling amazing but it was fine.

My internal clock is very good and I woke up 3 minutes before my alarm went off. I would wash my face and got dressed. I wanted to be out of the bathroom so I wasn't holding up Evan and Noelle. Who would wake up soon after me.

I went downstairs to say good morning to James, after greeting our guests. James had gone kayaking this morning and was making us cornbread for breakfast. I was excited for cornbread.

I would pick up some stuff and put things away. And James would start making coffee and things for Evan and Noelle. We had an hour to hang out. Enjoyed James's fabulous cornbread with butter and blackberry jam. They used more butter in the batter this time and it was such a nice consistency.

Evan and Noelle had to leave at 9. They would actually leave a few minutes after that. I was sad to see them go so early but they had to go pick up a roasted pig for a party. I understood. We are all so busy but I really appreciated them making the trip. And I hope we hang out again really soon.

After hugs all around James would walk them out. I laid on the couch for a few minutes. But pretty quickly went outside to sit on the porch swing. I had sat out there for a few minutes first thing this morning but it was just nice to lay down with a pillow and blanket while the sun wasn't on that side of the building yet.

James would come out to give me a kiss. They went to stretch and get themselves ready for a 30 mile bike ride with Beth (from the museum) and her husband. They are training for a longer tour and this was going to be a lot of uphill. I would wish them luck before they headed out.

I would spend the 4 or so hours doing little things. I did some knitting. I laid out a few of my projects today to try and map out what I will need to make to finish them. My puff quilt is still only half way done. I want to finish these two smaller projects ASAP. And I need to get my temperature blanket up to date soon. It's nice to have all these projects going. And it's nice to have a plan to finish them.

I would pull out our Ren fair stuff and started thinking about my costume for this year. I have decided I need a simple linen apron. Something with thin strings. I may end up making it myself but we will see what I can come up with.

I would rest for a while. Sometimes inside. Sometimes outside. Crabcake and Sweetp were enjoying the nice weather. Once the sun came to the backyard I would come back inside. I tried to eat lunch but it hurt my stomach really bad. I would have a popsicle. A grape one. And I just focused really hard on being hydrated today. Putting a coffee lid on my water bottle helped a lot. I think being dehydrated has exacerbated how bad I've felt. So I am making a very big effort, even though I'm finding it very hard.

I would take a bath at 11am. I was feeling weirdly itchy and my skin was very dry. So a nice bath and scrub and nice lotion after made me feel a lot more like a person.

I would spend a little time putting things away and making outfits for the week. I was in a good mood.

Jorge would text me to check in about visiting. I let them know that James was planning to be home around 2 so to aim for then. They said that was perfect. They would do laundry, since they are flying back to Spain tomorrow.

I would rest on the couch. I almost fell asleep but I didn't have enough time to actually nap. And pretty quickly Jorge was knocking on the door.

It was really nice to have him over. I showed him the whole house. And we would hang out on the couch until James got home. James was exhausted. It was a tough ride! But they had fun. And would go clean off.

We would talk about camp and Spain and books and art. Video games. Life. James would pull out the bucket grill and made is hot dogs for lunch.

I was doing really good keeping it together. Eating was very slow. And I was just enjoying the company and chatting. James would show us a trailer for a video game about a detective frog and we would end up buying it. Maybe I'll play that later this week.

Eventually James would leave to go do laundry. Said goodbye to Jorge and wished him luck on his travel home. And then me and Jorge spent the next hour or so talking about AI as a tool, modern and contemporary art and how so often you have to spend time and research to really understand what they were trying to say with their work, and about books and authors we love. I told him about Karen Russel and her short stories and how much they impacted me. It was just really a lovely afternoon.

I was getting tired though and Jorge had a dinner to go to. So after showing him my current knitting stuff he would call an Uber and headed home. Big hugs and well wished all around.

I was proud of myself for not feeling sick but apparently I just held it together until then. I would pretty quickly fall apart.

I took my medicine and drank water and laid down but would just end up quickly crying until James got home.

They would put the laundry away and came and gave me a cuddle. And then went to enjoy their evening in the kitchen.

They need me a potato dish for dinner. And then jumped into Angel food cake and pasta making. Since the angel food cake needs egg whites and the pasta needs the tools, it's kind of perfect to make together. I am very excited for the angel food cakes. They made them for me a lot last year and they are so nice. Way better then the ones from the store, which almost are always to dry or sharp tasting. It will be a really nice treat for tomorrow.

And tomorrow I have work! I'm doing low ropes at camp for the highschool that comes their first week of freshman year and their last week of senior year. I always like working with this group. And the groups are supposed to be really small tomorrow. But I think it'll be fun. And hopefully I feel good and can just be positive. I am going to just really focus on having a good day. And then coming home to take a nap.

I am going to go get ready for sleep now. I hope to just get a lot of rest and feel great tomorrow. I hope you all have a great night. Stay safe, wash your hands. Until tomorrow.

[smuppetshowmovie]

how many people are there working on the show?? i am truly amazed and wish you luck !!

What a great question, nonnie! Thanks for giving me an excuse to ramble!

Short answer = 8 people

Long answer: The big important early work was Laurasauras - she wrote the script!

Next came dialogue recordings from the amazingly talented Cal and Holli (as Dirk and Rose, respectively), plus me (as Terezi).

During filming, there were some scenes that needed more than just my own two hands. For those, I counted on Mr Bee (when I just needed one more person) and then my long-suffering friends Barb and/or Aie for when I needed three people at once. Since I am a terrible friend, I never just invite them over to hang out, but they are amazing and do not mind the couple times a year I reach out and ask if they can help out for an afternoon on whatever weird movie project I've got going on.

The music is a work in progress, but I have managed to ask for help at least once. I usually keep the details of my moviemaking hobby as vague as possible when talking to coworkers, but Josh and I had a long few months of working closely together that made me more talkative than usual. He ended up offering to improvise a very cool electric guitar solo for one of the songs I was struggling with at the time. It sounds amazing! I can only hope I'm able to bring the rest of the songs up to that level!

The rest of it is me. I love having an excuse to plan and make a million different arts & crafts projects. Filming and editing are great (at least once I can get myself into a groove). I'm mostly done with filming (just the second half of the end credits left to film) and then the major challenge is finishing the music. The upside of assigning myself all of the rest of the work is that I get to do it! The downside is that when I'm not doing it, nothing gets done! Day job stresses have been pulling me away a lot these past few months, so it's going soooooo slowly at the moment, but I trust that if I keep chipping away at it I'll eventually reach the finish line! Fingers crossed!

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

Hi! Could I pretty please have matchups for haikyuu and ninjago?

I'm an Enfp, and the oldest of four.

I like to think I'm relatively confident, but I do get anxious about almost anything at random times, but all in all I'm a people person, and I enjoy being in crowded environments likes malls or amusement parks.

My hobbies are mostly on the artistic side, I play guitar, I write for myself, I draw, and do pretty much any art project I can get my hands on.

I like music, fashion, video games, and just being outside. I hate to stay in one place for too long, a few days at home will make me lose my mind.

I like to joke around, I struggle to take things all too seriously, but I try.

I'm 5'7, long brown hair and brown eyes, glasses, and I'm kinda chubby ngl.

And yeah that's pretty much me, if you do do this, thanks a bunch💜

Hi Anon! Thank you for your request! Sorry it took so long. You didn't specify whether you would prefer a male or female matchup so I've given you one of each for both fandoms. They can be read as romantic or platonic. I hope you like your matchups!

In Haikyuu, I match you with...

Hinata needs someone confident and outgoing in his life to keep up with him. If that's you, I wish you the best of luck! He's a great person to be around but it takes a lot of energy.

He loves your sense of humour! No matter if anyone else thinks the jokes you make are funny or not, he'll always laugh. He thinks your jokes are great.

There'll be no staying in one place with this guy. When he's still in school, he's always changing up his schedule and going on trips for volleyball and once he's graduated, he's travelling globally for the sport. He'd love it if you travel with him.

Please draw him while he's at practice. If you show him some drawing of him paused in motion, he'll be incredibly grateful. He'd love to hang it on his wall as a reminder of you and his passion for sport.

Hinata would enjoy playing video games with you. He particularly likes rhythm games and ones that can keep him engaged, otherwise he gets bored.

In Haikyuu, I also match you with...

Yui is a lot like Hinata in that she's an energetic person with a lot of passion. You'd get along well since you're able to match that energy.

I see her as someone who enjoys dressing up to go out when she's not training. She's not able to do nice hairstyles or makeup when training so it's a nice change of pace. She'll ask you for advice since you like fashion.

In the same vein, Yui likes going shopping with you. As much as she loves volleyball, it's nice to get away from it for a while.

Loves listening to you play guitar. She likes the songs you play and any mistakes you make bring her a sense of joy knowing it's you playing, not some generic artist.

She also enjoys watching you draw and work on your latest art project. She likes watching your latest creation come together.

In Ninjago, I match you with...

Cole is a lot like you in that he’s confident but his confidence has limits. You can both help each other when your anxieties take over.

He’s someone who likes to get out and about a lot so you’re more than welcome to tag along with him. He likes the company and enjoys being able to explore new places together.

Will absolutely take you to amusement parks. He loves the energy they provide and it’s a win-win that you like them as well. He’ll try to win some prizes for you at the sideshows…please stop him from spending all of his money…

In the movie, Cole is a big fan of music and I think this also fits his show personality quite well. He’d love listening to you play guitar and, if he knows the song and has an instrument laying around, will join in.

I can see you hanging out a lot with Cole and Jay since you also share a lot in common with the lightning ninja. You all play video games and crack jokes together. It’s an all-round good time.

In Ninjago, I also match you with...

Skylor balances out your lack of seriousness without your personalities clashing. If she can get along with Kai, she can get along with you.

Enjoys going to malls with you but more so that she can get away from work. It’s a nice break and she gets to spend time with you. Just don’t go near the food court. She deals with enough of that at work…

I see Skylor as someone who enjoys travelling around the world. It takes time and money but she really loves seeing new places and getting away from the mundane nature of day to day life.

She’d be over the moon if you join her on these travels. You’d get to deepen your bond and you’d both have wonderful, shared memories of your time together.

When you’re feeling anxious, Skylor’s there to boost your confidence. She somehow knows what to say and when to say it, even if she comes off as blunt sometimes. She really does have your best intentions at heart.

[lady-of-glass-and-bone]

Helloooo! I've seen a couple of your monster matches on my dash and I thought this looked super fun :3 I'm open to a one-shot if you want to try writing one but I won't be upset if you don't, it's all in good fun.

You can call me Spooky 👻 My favorite color is purple, my ideal aesthetic is romantic victorian/baroque goth but my actual clothing style is just as close to that as I can afford lol. My favorite artists are AFI and In This Moment.

I love being outdoors, I hate being trapped inside. 100% a summer goth, I call myself a vampire in love with the sun lol. I am also genuinely nocturnal. I have a very rare sleep disorder that makes my natural sleep-wake cycle to fall asleep when the sun comes up and wake up sometime in the early afternoon. (Finding a job that fits this was not easy, thank you for asking 😂)

I get excited and energetic very easily but I'm also quite mellow and enjoy winding down from that. I can thrive in large groups having big adventures and I can thrive having a calm and cozy night in. I'm a bit of a social chameleon, I guess. I'll enjoy anything as long as I'm with people I like. I've gravitated towards art forms that are slowly fading, like film photography and bookbinding. I am exceptionally lucky that I made it to the recovery stage of severe depression and debilitating mental illness. I try not to lean into that with personality tests but having a personality disorder is a bit of an important ingredient of my life lol.

Sorry if that was A Lot™ but hopefully it's at least useful if you end up wanting to write a oneshot. I hope these little projects are giving you the creative boost you needed. Don't forget to keep hydrated and take care of yourself, and best of luck! 💜🖤

Demon

You and your demon meet over a shared love of film photography, developing your pictures in a mutual dark room. You tend to keep to the later hours and at first your demon suspects you are a supernatural creature of your own.

They're a little surprised to learn you are just a nocturnal human, which is a plus for them. The night is warmth and embracing for a creature like them, hides the horns and the whip thin tail where the sun brings them out.

You bond over the lost arts of many kinds, they can help teach you about almost anything (they have been around for many, many years after all). They appreciate your chameleon like skills in social settings, going with the flow is no easy task, life takes many twists and turns but you'll have your demon there with you for as long as you wish.

Star gazing dates or later afternoon picnics (or wherever you're comfortable). Sometimes lazy days curled up as you sleep the sunrise away while your demon joins you or reads beside you. Wandering through new towns/parts of the city is totally even better with your demon at your side, showing you all the hidden spots.

Also, they are very proud of you for being in a recovery stage for your mental health issues, as demons know all to well how treacherous the mind can be, how much hard work it is and they applaud and help you every chance they get.

(omg I haven't listened to AFI in forever! forgot how much I loved them)

Artists: AFI, In This Moment

[hekkoto]

Big big LIFE UPDATE! IMPORTANT STUFF HERE!

Heya my darklings <3 so, Im coming with some life update, Im happy to say that stuff starts to look waaaaay better!

First and the most important: Im super grateful for your love and support, I had really awful time lately and your kind words really helped me <3 My mind often tells me that nobody would miss me and Im just a problem but people patiently keep telling me that truth is opposite and many people would miss me and they really care about me. Thank you guys, really

So the best thing: My parents told me they gonna pay for my therapy, I have psychiatrist next week and I gonna ask to get it prescribed to me. Im deeply disturbed person and especially now I need this the most. So yeah, I gona try fix my life at least partially! I also gonna ask for meds for ADHD and hopefully I can end this nightmare ^^;

I started limiting substances like alcohol or too much pills. Going slowly but hopefully theraphy will allow me to end usage without any party or smth. Drinking with people is fine, I just shouldnt start day with this or do it daily >.> wish me luck!

I was invited to podcast! Here is clip: https://www.instagram.com/p/C-N9M01q2Tf/ it should be aviable somewhere in next month! [on this clip you can see my fabulous big Hello Kitty sticker on my wardrobe >XD]

In last days my mood is mostly on euphoric side which gives me hopes things will be easier now ;-; trust me, last weeks almost killed me, I was on edge of my strenght. I gonna catch up on the most important stuff first and then I gonna work a lot on videos and arts ^^ Im super grateful for your love and patience, really <3

I will try to sort my life now, I have to book some treatments and such, I will try to go back to more healthy diet and hopefully start exercising! I definetelly must catch up on important arts and focus on projects Im working on! I will show some cool stuff soon ^^ My plans are coming back to weekly short comics, finishing my comic Welcome To My Hell, releasing first video for arg horror Denimo's art space, I hope to make 3 vidoes on my YT per week and deliver all of promised Patreon rewards [I gonna look through them and note in calendar when I want to post stuff and hopefully it will allow me to fulfill all of them! I also gonna come back to drawing answers for this ask/dare Jeff thingy

I will be opening my KoFi shop soon! First I gonna offer some handmade stuff like earrings, chokers, magnets, keyrings and stickers and shortly after I will be offering prints. In near future I also plan to offer small originals of my paintings <3 and of course more handmade stuff ;p

Im focused on my goal of making living as an artist. Im also full of motivation and this mostly euphoric mood gives me a lot of strenght. I believe I can make it and I know this will help me with my borderline if I will be focusing on arts and engaging with lots of people. What I can say, borderline loves attention >XD so better give it to me ;p

Anyway, thank you a lot again <3 I thought it all gonna end soon but I guess I can try push a little harder <3

Love ya,

Hekkoto

[pawlmtree]

I have a question about how hard it is to learn Japanese when you're being taught in a classroom as opposed to online. I'm gonna try to get a bachelor's degree in biology to hopefully be able to get into med school, and that course requires fluency in one or more foreign languages, so I'm considering also going for a minor in Japanese. However, I've never actually learned Japanese in a classroom setting before. Does learning in a classroom setting make it easier?

I won't be starting on the bachelor's program until at the earliest spring of 2026 (university I want to go to is out of state so I'm gonna try to get residency in that state before doing college) but I figured I'd ask how hard Japanese is to learn in a classroom setting anyway lol. Hope life's treating you well :)

i wish you luck with all of that!!! during highschool, i was actually briefly considering majoring in biology before i chose the art/japanese double major....

to answer your question, in my personal experience YES learning in a classroom setting makes it a lot easier, especially if you're someone who works well with other people or needs to ask questions to a teacher/expert to properly understand things. i'm lucky enough to have had multiple japanese language professors in the past who have taken extra time during or after class to answer my questions/further explain things, and this was reaally important for me and made a big difference compared to when i was just trying to study on my own. being in a class can also give you a sense of structure and urgency, especially if you will have projects or tests. in most of my jp classes thus far we've had weekly kanji quizzes and the pressure of wanting to do well is actually helpful for me to actually make sure that i properly study those things. i hope that if/when you take a class that you'll get a professor who is patient and (com)passionate!!

[invader-777]

How did you get into animation? Im 23 and feel its too late to get into it

HI HI HI!! So sorry I'm responding to this so late! I had work yesterday and I have been so tired out from the physical labor, on top of other personal drama I don't want to delve into.

To answer your question, I'm still trying to get into the animation industry, so I'm not a certified professional yet. Emphasis on YET. I will be turning 25 in 5 months and I still haven't had the job opportunity come my way. So if you think age has any factor in getting into the career: rest assured that age has no limit in this industry. To get further into detail, I'll add a read more about the intricacies that I've learned from the animation industry so far <3

So the animation experience varies from person to person. I've had friends who started their careers with big studios right after we all graduated art school by age 22. You have people like me who are still looking for a job in the industry by age 24, and show no signs of stopping. I've seen plenty of artists over 30 and 40 barely getting their foot in the door into the career. Don't let these young content creators or success stories of infamous show runners make you think you're too late to get started in animation!

As an example: J.G. Quintel ,the creator of Regular Show, took what I believe was 10 years to get started at Cartoon Network after graduating from CALarts, and spent those 10 years after graduating working retail and register jobs.

Consider your factors in life. For me, I grew up with a town that never favored the arts, so I thankfully had the financial support to go to an art school in California for a couple of years to expand and improve the skills I previously had. DO NOT THINK THAT GOING TO ART SCHOOL IS A MUST! Plenty of artists in this career have gotten successful without ever having went to college. Unless you think you need it and you have the money, then start researching where you'd want to attend, look at the intuition and alumni reviews and etc.

As far as portfolio advice goes, my professors have taught me one thing I keep in mind: ✨QUALITY OVER QUANTITY✨. You can have a small and dingy or big and fancy portfolio, but recruiters will not care. As long as you have the skill they're looking for, that's all that matters. Do not be afraid to draw something outside of your comfort zone - flexibility in your skills is a bonus. Anatomy and cafè/life drawings are a must to show companies you know how to draw humans and animals. Most importantly, try to cater to the specific job in the industry you want to aim for. If you're looking to only be a storyboard artist, show thumbnails, rough sketches, and your own animatics/storyboards projects. And vice versa appplies for the other positions out there.

My last pieces of advice: DO. NOT. GIVE. UP. This profession relies on passion, optimism, resilience, preservation, and determination. The second you give up, it's over. Obviously this doesn’t mean you can't draw for yourself or take a break; but do not get discouraged from being denied or ignored from the opportunities you apply to, that you don't see the point in it anymore. These, at this time, are extremely common, but they aren't a reflection of you as an artist or as a person. This is why you constantly need to practice as much as you can, thus going back to never giving up. That way, when you apply again, you'll be better than you were before, improving your chances of getting hired even more.

Do not worry about your age and thinking that it's too late for you. In this industry, it's never too late to start your career regardless of your age. Stay vigilant, do not give up, and always practice on improving your drawing skills! I hope this helps and I wish you the best of luck in your endeavor 💖 here's to one day working with each other🌸

[f3ralblog]

The social block

I am a social nightmare right now. Largely incapable of doing the things I "should" do to push my art - going to see my friends and peers do their thing, sharing music, networking. I feel so blocked. I wish it were as easy as I think it is to just do these things.

I'm planning a BIG move. I'm working on a new learning skill to try and finance my life and hopefully get back into making music for fun/enjoyment instead of being a hired gun or "professional artist."

I care SO much about the music that I make. Probably too much, and I've tied too much of my personal/professional identity to it. I feel completely at peace on stage, doing MY thing, and I never want to let that go. Anywhere else - I feel like I have to lie to everyone and pretend like I want to be there.

It's the other 1001 pieces of being an artist that drain me. I'm afraid and have terrible anxiety around the social needs of being a professional in this industry. I am absolute GARBAGE at small talk, and only really engage well in a social environment where I can speak to the things I know. Or otherwise, I fall silent or deflect socially to letting the other person talk at me.

Every time I try some new "hey, listen!" tactic it falls flat. In person or online - I have a horrible time sharing my story. If prompted with the right questions, you might get to finagle a couple of good chunks of my life. Otherwise, good luck trying to get to know me or learn about anything I'm doing! I don't text anyone anything, without a prompt or a years-long feeling of dread that I'll lose the relationship if I don't say SOMETHING. If you get a Happy Birthday from me, it's my way of reaching out and saying "I don't feel obligated to you, but I would like to continue having you in my life."

I KNOW I'm doing it wrong. It's not about knowing, it's about the confidence to try again and again until it works. I'm great at this when it's directly about improving skills, but terrible at it when it comes to being the mouthpiece for my art. Or maintaining human relationships with people I care about.

I push people away. I lash out at some arbitrary Pittsburgh overlord that keeps putting me down. I lash out at the people who may be trying to help but I feel misaligned with. I've been made increasingly aware of my "otherness" when I look at the people who have the means to support me. This awareness is paralyzing and leads me to villainize people without understanding their true intents.

But ultimately it's me. I'm the problem. It's always been me. And my music, the ART, suffers for it.

I haven't been getting hit up for gigs as often as I used to, which is in line with what I was hoping for this year (more freedom to play original music solo or with my band). Some part of me, though, wonders if I did something wrong - I was expecting to have to turn down more work, but ultimately found that I don't have as much incoming work to turn down as I care to admit.

I don't know what my relationship is to this professional world of music and art. I'd like to continue to be a part of it, but I can't do it the same way I used to.

I am grateful (and beyond) about the opportunities that my solo project (f3ralcat) and my band (Feralcat and the Wild) have been receiving. We're on the map and it's exhilarating! It's affirming and I want to continue with the mindset that I'm doing what's right for me. It's also a bit terrifying because I don't want Pittsburgh to be the ceiling for what my band is capable of.

All-in-all, I think I’m beyond help in this industry. I’m frozen, blocked, paralyzed and currently incapable of making the right decisions for my career. Whatever you do - don’t be like me.