#dean heartbreak

[strawlessandbraless]

The divorce arc was really something else

[acecroft]

SUPERNATURAL 5.16

[mlobsters]

supernatural s11e20 don't call me shurley (w. robbie thompson)

[redmyeyes]

one brotherlook per ep -> 6x05 ❝ Live Free or Twihard ❞

[zombiegirldean]

hi it's me Dean winchester showing up haggard and haunted at your door again. I have a bunch of cryptic things to imply and then refuse to elaborate on. I AM an active suicide risk. btw I decided that you and your son represent the archetypal nuclear family I never had. I also decided, despite us honestly barely knowing each other, that I will do Anything to Protect and Save you. i will defend the sanctity of your peace and security at any cost. I will die for you. no I can't come inside. of course I can't come inside.

[dragonardhill]

Regarding Dean 12.11

[girls-alias]

Dean's Dream P7

Title: Dean's Dream P7

Part 6

Words: 1,979

Relations: Dean Winchester X Reader

TW: Sad.

Masterlist

Prompt:

Dean is captured by a Djinn and dreams of Y/N.

It's been a year now. A whole year of pain and false hope. Today's the anniversary and the feelings from waking up haven't changed. I still look for her and wonder where I had seen her for her to be in my dream. I think I hear her voice, I think I see her smile, I think I see her in the distance but it's never her. I can't count the tears I cried for her, the tears that fell for the woman and the life I had lost. There were no words available to me that could truly express my loss.

Sam had tried everything, I appreciated his help but there was no way to understand or help, he didn't get it. Yeah, he lost Jess but losing Y/N was different in my eyes. I only had her for a day before she was gone again, and yet she promised me perfection; it would have been easy to give me all she had promised.

Sam knew the anniversary today. The anniversary of the day I gained nothing but lost it all. I will admit, I lost the plot a little. I began looking for djinns just so they could take me back to her but Sam always stopped me or they were well hidden.

I groaned as Sam slammed his fist against my bedroom door. I rolled over, pulling the blanket over my head. If there was ever a day that I should be left alone it was today, Sam didn't recognise that or if he did, he didn't care.

"Come on, Dean," He commented loudly as he walked in. I considered using the gun under my pillow. "I already moved your gun, come on. We're going out," He explained he knew what I was thinking. He sighed when I showed no indication of getting up. With a fast swipe, he pulled the blanket off me. I looked up at the ceiling, silently praying for the strength to deal with him today.

I sat up, groaning as I wiped my eyes. "Look, Sam. I'm not in the mood," I explained, anger lacing my tone even though I was trying to sound calm.

"I know but this could be good," He tried, he took a seat at the edge of my bed, looking at me hopefully. I rolled my eyes at his false hope. The stupid hope I had lost not too long ago. "So, you said the houses looked like they were in Salt Lake. I know we've already looked but what if she's looking today as well. She might be looking for you too," I wanted to hope. A month ago, I would already be on those streets searching for her but today, I knew it was a waste of time. I had made her up, she wasn't real.

Y/N'S POV:

"Dean!" I tried to scream but a tube down my throat stopped me. I choked on it slightly. My eyes quickly wandered around the room. Where's Dean?!

I quickly learned I had been in a coma for nearly 3 months. Doctors didn't expect me to wake, I showed no signs of waking but I knew it was because of Dean. I had asked nurses where he was, asking when he was coming back but they explained sadly that I had no visitors. Really no one? When I was a little more stable, a kind doctor explained that I was brought in for a car crash, my family were in the car but I was the only survivor. He asked if I remembered the crash but I can't remember anything before Dean. I don't remember being young, I don't remember who I was, in my mind, I was Dean's and he was mine.

Therapists took an interest in my case as they all seemed to want to examine my brain. They all explained that dream comas were common but the fact I believed it so deeply and couldn't remember anything before it made my case even more appealing to them. They would try and coax new answers out of me, each week asking if I had remembered anything new, each time growing a little more frustrated that my memory made no improvement but I was fine with that, my whole being believing Dean and my time with him wasn't a dream.

"Oh, I won't make it to my next session," I explained nonchalantly as I gathered my bag and stood from my chair. My therapist, Noah, looked at me confused. I smiled at the thought. "I'm going to Salt Lake City to find Dean," I explained but his eyes showed sorrow. His smile faded and tightened into a thin line.

"Y/N, I don't want to upset you but you've already looked, it was just a dream," He reminded me though I'd never be able to forget his opinion as he says it multiple times in one session. I rolled my eyes.

"I already bought the coach tickets and I have it planned out this time," I explained but his unimpressed expression told me he doesn't believe me. I sighed, pulling the map from my pocket. I opened it, flattening it on his coffee table. "I start here," Pointing to the coach station. "I'll walk up to the house we had, stay there for about an hour, walk to Sam's house, this way and then get coffee from his favourite cafe and stay local until my coach leaves," I explained, often following the route I would walk with my finger. He looked between me and the map unconvinced. I rolled my eyes again. "It's been a whole year if he's going there to look for me, it'll be today,"

Dean's POV:

I groaned sitting back in my seat as Sam drove us to Salt Lake City. A part of me wondered if I actually would see her but I fear getting my hopes up because it will only hurt more.

Y/N'S POV:

I stepped off the coach with a wide smile, holding my backpack straps as I looked around hopefully. Please be here!

I started my walk to the house. Music played through my earphones as I walked, smiling happily at everyone I passed, once I made it to the neighbourhood I smiled even wider. I looked at the house, the dream. I sighed, a little disheartened he wasn't already waiting for me. I took a deep breath, strutted over to the house and took a seat on the curb, I took my earphones out so I could listen out for him calling my name. My attention turned to my book to pass the time but I could barely focus. Any noise and I was looking around for him. I wonder if he'll look different. I wonder if he smells different. I can't lose hope.

Dean's POV:

As we drove the streets that felt familiar and heartbreaking, I found myself looking around for her. I shouldn't have got my hopes up but Sam's right. If she's looking for me, it will be today.

The houses began feeling more and more familiar, and recognising them only made me gasp. "Turn left," I instructed eagerly.

Y/N'S POV:

I had been sitting on the curb, coming up to two hours now, I was getting anxious not seeing him but plastered a smile on my face. I started the walk to Sam's house. Following the route, we had driven a year ago.

Dean's POV:

"Stop, stop," I opened the door before he even stopped. I rushed up the path and porch steps knocking quickly. I found it! I found the house. I waited impatiently before a man answered the door looking at me confused. I looked at him slightly confused as I expected Y/N, my beautiful Y/N. "Sorry, doesn't Y/N live here?" I asked, looking past his shoulder slightly.

"No, I'm sorry. I think you have the wrong house," He explained. I sighed.

"Thanks anyway," I turned back, walking back as Sam stood, door open looking over the car. He looked at me hopefully but I shook my head. I climbed in resting my head on the headrest. Sam got back in, apologising for my heart breaking another time.

"We'll wait here, maybe she'll think the same thing," Sam said hopefully. I ignored him as I rested my head on the side, mindlessly looking out the window, a tear falling from my eyes with ease.

Y/N'S POV:

I made it to Sam's house surprised. The house had been pulled down to make room for a kid's park that was still in construction. I sighed continuing on to Dean's favourite cafe. It was a long shot he would remember it but it's still something.

I made it in, ordering myself a drink before taking a seat at a table. All my plans felt like a waste of time. Maybe Noah and everyone else was right. Maybe I truly did dream of him. Maybe I was making myself crazy by believing it. I put my headphones in, resting my cheek on my palm as I practically sulked while reading. My heartbreak echoed through the air. I wiped the tears as they fell. All hope faded to nothingness.

Dean's POV:

I reluctantly guided Sam to the house he had lived at. Finding it was a park under construction only hurt my heart more.

"Let's just get some coffee and have a think about it," He suggested but I just want to go home.

We parked up, finding a coffee shop further down the street. I sighed, heading straight for the tables as Sam went to the counter to order our drinks. I took a seat, noticing the seat behind me was unoccupied but a book and backpack saved the seat. I sighed, resting my head in my crossed arms as I waited for Sam.

Y/N'S POV:

I got back to my seat, barely paying attention to anything around me. I moved my backpack onto the table, carefully climbing into my seat as a troubleman took a seat behind my chair. I sat, my headphones returning to my ears as I resumed my position, reading with my cheek on my palm.

Dean's POV:

Sam came over, drinks in hand as he took a seat opposite me. I drank hastily. I just want to leave. Sam began brainstorming things we could do to look for her. I sighed, resting my chin on my palm as I rolled my eyes. I don't have the strength in me anymore.

THIRD PERSON POV:

Y/N checked her watch. Sighing a final time, she rose from her seat, gathering her things and leaving the table.

"I need the bathroom," Dean instructed, getting up from his seat. She looked down at her phone as she changed the song on her playlist, a song full of rage playing through them as she felt numb, the heartbreak can only hurt so much before you feel nothing.

Though expected they did not see each other. It seemed to have been timed imperfectly. If she had waited one moment later or if he had got up one second earlier they would have bumped into each other. Yet she still walked out of the cafe and he still went to the bathroom. Neither knew their true love was behind them and neither knew their breaking hearts could have been healed with one second. One second either of them could have changed to meet but neither knew, and neither would know. She still got on her coach, and he still drove home. Both believed the dream was fake and both left, their heart empty and souls crushed.

If they knew how close they were to having the reunion, it would only hurt them more. Both lost hope, neither looking for each other again. The emptiness never fades and pain never heals. He owned her heart and she his, forever.

Masterlist

Part 8

[heretherebedork]

Dean: *planning to lightly tease and be a bit serious about Win and Team*

Win: *shatters into a thousand pieces of fear and love and loss and panic and deep-seated emotional issues that he's repressed*

Dean: ... wait what?

[1unpunishable1]

The characters I relate to

[vendettasfanfictioning]

Devastated to report that out of 114K+ destiel fics on AO3, only 30 are tagged with "Hanahaki Disease."

[tsukiyo-7]

I'm a little crazy about them.

Summer Film Festival of Death by OldToadWoman

[strawlessandbraless]

For anyone curious about the long running Jensen Ackles show Supernatural, but unsure if they have the time, audacity, and wherewithal to persevere. Let me save you the trouble:

That’s the whole show 💙 💚

[acecroft]

You've been looking out for me… your whole life. SUPERNATURAL 7.08

[chief-girl]

DO NOT WATCH THIS

...💀...

[redmyeyes]

one brotherlook per ep -> 6x03 ❝ The Third Man ❞

[storywriter007]

(Part 1) I'm Just Like Everyone Else - Dean Winchester x Fem!Reader

summary: in which y/n leaves dean all alone, after making a big mistake

warnings: cursing, implications of sex

genre: angst/heartbreak

word count: 913

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y/n sat on the bed of the motel room, reading through various books and papers. dean sat on the desk of the motel room, reading through different online sites.

on the outside, they appeared calm. but both of them were plagued with sadness. dean's internal hell revolved around the fact sammy was missing. y/n's inner calamity revolved around everytime dean looked at her.

she'd known him for a couple of months now. they'd met when dean saved her ass in a fight with a werewolf, and they'd been together every since. well not that together, just in the same place at the same time together.

to be frank, y/n had hopelessly fallen in love with dean. i mean, can you blame her? they'd spent hundreds of late nights, talking about the things they'd seen and what their significance was. they'd spent thousands of minutes, sitting across from each other, searching for information. they'd spent so many days in that car, singing to every song that played.

yes, she wanted to confess to him. but how? his brother is missing. she can't pop up with an "i'm hopelessly in love with you. please give me a chance." oh god no.

y/n's chain of thought was broken when she realized dean had finished his second bottle of beer within forty minutes.

"why don't you slow down? i don't want to deal with a drunk dean." she laughed.

"i don't want to deal with a dean at all." he said, glumly.

y/n shut her book.

"are you alright?" she asked, concern apparent in her voice.

he looked at her.

"yeah, just thinkin bout' sammy." he nodded.

"we'll find him. we've got to." she assured.

on a couple of these late nights, the two would become vulnerable with one-another. dean would share stories about his father (who y/n hated) and she would share stories about her childhood.

"i wonder what my dad would say right now." he chuckled. "losing my little brother."

"your dad wouldn't say shit. you raised sam more than he did." y/n defended.

"that never stopped him before." he added. "sometimes, i think he's right."

a brief silence arose.

"right that i'm not doing enough." he said.

"well, he's wrong."

"is he? is he really?" dean asked, green eyes meeting y/n's. "because i lost sam. he's sure as hell got a point."

y/n stood up and made her way over to dean.

"no he doesn't. you've done more than enough and you're still doing more than enough." y/n sighed. "you're a good man, dean."

they looked into each other's eyes for a moment. dean placed his arm around y/n and their lips collided.

---------------------------------------------

a couple of minutes later, y/n was laying half-naked next to dean, and contemplating all of her life decisions. the regret burned her.

why? why did she fall for his trap? it's over for her. she'd given herself to him, there was no point in confessing any love to him. it was over. she'd become one of dean's many hook-ups. a woman from his past.

dean was wearing his jeans with flannel. y/n was wearing the same, but with a bra underneath. he tried to initiate small talk, but it was just awkward. y/n couldn't bring herself to speak, paralyzed by the reality that she had just become one of his flings. nothing more, nothing less. a one night stand. after so many sleepless nights, this is what she had amounted too. another hook-up.

"are you alright?" he asked, but y/n thoughts drowned out his question.

he tapped her shoulder. she suddenly turned and faced him.

"what?"

"i asked if you were alright."

she nodded and grabbed the book she had been reading, and continued reading it.

"you don't seem alright." he said.

"i'm fine." she fake-smiled.

"are you?" he asked.

she shut her book.

"you got me. i'm not." she said.

"why?" he questioned.

"why do you think dean?" she asked softly. "it wasn't supposed to be like this."

"be like what? what is it?" he continued.

"us." she said, desperation evident in her voice. "in case you haven't noticed, i'm insanely in love with you."

the weight on her shoulders was supposed to be lifted, but it wasn't. in fact, it weighed down heavier.

"and i didn't know how to tell you, which is my fault. and i'm so fucking stupid because now, i'm just one of dean winchester's many hook-ups." she confessed. "i'm just like everyone else. i'm no better than any other girl, and i can't even blame them. you're so easy to love."

she looked at him, water forming in the corner of her eyes, but she would not cry.

"that's not true-"

"no, it is. you're not going to think any more of me now that we've slept together. and it's over for me, it's over for us." she said, voice cracking. "i'm so fucking stupid."

y/n got up and began making her way to the door.

"where are you going? y/n-" dean asked.

"i'm sorry dean, i have to go." she confirmed.

she looked at his enchanting eyes one last time.

"i can't be near you knowing i'm of no value to you. i can't be around you knowing that i'm just one of your flings now."

"y/n-"

it was far too late. y/n had shut the door and left.

she was gone. long gone.

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part 2 (happy ending)

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