#do not repeat effective only with plants

[avinorlk]

Scientific methods

Scientific - yes. Effective - unlikely.

XGaster, XAlphys -> @jakei95

Little pink cutie -> @pinguuupongooo

[lymtw]

hello Mal!!! i have a nsfw req for toji x shy reader cuz they’re my fav and i literally think about it 24/7.

shy reader who’s not as vocal during sex with toji bc she gets nervous :( so he edges her til she squirts for the first time but only if she uses her voice!!!

Hello, hello! Thank you for reading and for sending this request in ☺️💙

Toji and his shy girl

"What are you doing down there?" Toji asks, finally giving in to the distraction of you sitting at his feet, rather than sitting next to him.

"I'm watching the movie," you respond, with an innocent amount of truthfulness. You don't turn around to look at him, so you're met with a poke to your shoulder. That instinctively makes you turn your head in the direction of the contact.

"The couch is too big. Even for me, doll. Come sit." He pats the spot next to him and shifts where he sits, as if making even more room for you.

Your eyes flit between him and the cushion for a couple seconds before you respond. "I'm okay staying here. I don't wanna make you uncomfortable." You smile, kindly, and turn back to face the screen again.

Toji's brows furrow in misunderstanding. He taps your shoulder again, receiving the same look when you turn, again. You tilt your head in question.

"You wouldn't be making me uncomfortable. Far from it, with the enormous gap of space that would be between us. What if I wanted you to sit between my legs, instead?" He catches the way your eyes widen for a split second, your inhibition cleared for the short span of time. "Come sit, baby," he repeats, this time patting the unoccupied space of the cushion he's sitting on.

You don't want to make him wait any longer. The movie is still playing, you'll both lose track of the plot if you take any longer. You stand from your place on the ground and move to sit next to him. As soon as you bend down to sit, his hands go to your hips and he pulls you so that you fall into the place he wanted you in.

"There you go. Now pay attention to the movie."

–

You try for him. You're trying so hard to ignore the pressure of his forearms around your waist, and the warmth of his wrists against the sliver of skin revealed by your slightly lifted shirt. You can occasionally hear him sigh through his nose, only further adding on to the tension you feel upon sitting between his legs. You don't even know how he's watching the movie. You feel like you're obstructing his vision.

The movie ends and you're left staring at the title screen.

"Okay, movie's over. You probably want me off-"

"No." His arms fasten even more around you. "I'm comfortable. Are you not?"

"N-No, I am. It's just... I wasn't sure if you wanted to keep me here for a whole other movie."

"I could keep you here longer than that, doll." He straightens his posture and readjusts your position, so that he's not slouching and you're not leaning back uncomfortably. He can feel the tension surface on your body as you go rigid in his hold. He can't help but let out a small laugh at how this detail never ceases with you. "Relax, baby. What's got you so nervous?" He rests his chin on your shoulder and turns to get a better look at your face. "Hm?" He plants a chaste kiss to your temple.

"Nothing, I guess. We're just watching movies," you say, more as a reminder for yourself.

"Mhm. Watching movies... on the verge of cuddling..." he mumbles, into your neck. "Nothing to be nervous about."

His hands splay over your lower abdomen and you think he might be caressing your skin so sensually to mess with you after having said all those things to comfort you, but he's not relenting on the joke. He's kissing your shoulder, aiming to relieve you of some of your anxiety so that your body can melt into comfort. It has some effect on you, your nerves being mixed with something hot, now.

"We can do more than cuddling, if you want," he hums, grinning at the way you shudder. "You know, i've been dying to hear that pretty voice of yours."

"What?" you say, laughing nervously, like you misheard him.

"You've got a really nice voice, baby. I swear, I could listen to you talk, endlessly. Wish you would use it when I take you to bed. You don't make a peep, doll."

You go silent. Not because you're upset with him, or because what he said isn't true, but because you can't think of how to respond to that. You didn't think he was monitoring the sounds you make. He never said anything about it before. You figured maybe he preferred the silence.

"It's embarrassing..." you finally mumble, quickly turning around to right what may have come out wrong. "F-For me! Just me. You're fine to make all the sound you want. It's... it's just me." You turn back around to hide the flush of embarrassment on your cheeks.

"Why is it embarrassing? Am I not making you feel good enough?"

You can't let him feel that way.

"No, Toji- That's not- No, no, no. That's not the case, at all." You unwind his arms from your torso and turn to face him. You fully sit on his lap, and though the eye contact that comes after you wrap your legs around him was like having three cups of coffee on an empty stomach for your heart, you summed up the courage because it's not fair to let him think that way when it's the exact opposite. "I just..." you let out a small sigh. "I don't wanna be loud. I don't want you to hear me. God... I can barely even look at you when we... you know." You look down at where your hands absentmindedly rested on his stomach. "Sorry."

He's just smiling at you because he finds your entire existence beside him to be endearing. His hands go to yours. "I get to stare at your pretty face the entire time." He grins, watching the way your cheeks burn and how you try to distract yourself from his gaze by fidgeting with his hands. "You always look so good, ma. Bet you sound just as pretty."

There was so much tension in the silence that followed. He started playing with your hands. He would interlock his fingers with yours before slowly detangling your hands and repeating the process, flipping your hands this time. He got to feel the smoothness of your unpainted nails on the pads of his fingers, and he traced the lines etched into your palms.

Things got out of hand. One minute you were holding hands and laughing to yourselves with thoughts of how silly yet necessary the moment was, the next you were both undressing, and kissing like you missed each other terribly. He has his hands on your hips, guiding you up and down his cock while you hide your face in the crook of his neck. He's groaning and panting at the feeling of your velvety walls hugging him so tightly, and you just release little breaths into his neck, occasionally gasping when he hits a sensitive spot, as per usual.

"Baby," he pants, "let me hear you. Give me those pretty sounds."

"G-Gonna cum," you whisper, your breath becoming heavier with every upwards thrust of his hips.

"Not if you don't let me hear you."

He can feel you clenching around him more frequently. It's a telltale sign of your orgasm rolling in, so he immediately stops. Both of you are unsatisfied, but Toji can handle it for as long as it takes you to make a sound that isn't just your breathing. He can tell you want to, too, with the occasional squeaks that leave you.

"I-I was gonna-"

"And I meant what I said." He's just as edged and frustrated as you are. Despite not getting the sounds he wants from you so easily, you're still make him feel really good. Your touch, the skin-to-skin of you clinging onto him—it's enough to bring him towards the edge as well, and it takes every ounce of restraint for him to stop. He squeezes your waist when he sees the look of helpless desperation on your face. "You know I have all the patience when it comes to you, doll. We can do this all night. I just wanna know—audibly—that I'm making you feel as good as you say I am. Alright?"

You sigh, but nod in understanding.

"Good. Let's try that again."

Despite your gesture of comprehension, you're doing the same thing all over again. You're feeling good, you're comfortable and Toji sounds immensely hot as he continues to drive you up and down his length. Your arms are wrapped around his neck, your face once again buried into the crook of it. All that can be heard from you is your breathing, the warm air fanning over his already heated skin.

"Doll," he calls, feeling the way you mouth at his shoulder and neck.

"Please, just a little longer. Please," you murmur, feeling that spike in pleasure return again.

"Doll, you're not..." he groans. He knows he has to stop or you'll get what you want, and what he wants will be pushed aside. "You're not letting me hear your pretty voice."

"Please, please, please, Toji. I-I'm right there..."

"Uh-uh." With heavy hands weighing down your hips like cinder blocks, you're once again denied of that weakening force of pleasure.

"T-Toji," you utter, weakly. You drag your face down to his chest, and allow all the heavy breaths of the forceful stop to come out. Your cunt is throbbing, viciously. You're aching for more of him.

The man who usually caved to your every want and put your needs before everything, was suddenly being incredibly selfish with your pleasure, stopping every time you say you're close. You think you can find a way around it by just not warning him, but he knows your body like the back of his hand. He knows every one of the signs that come with your orgasms, making it pointless for you to try to evade his torture. He's done it to the point where you feel like mush, sluggishly lying against him.

"Look at me, doll. Lift your head."

"Mm-mm." You shake your head against his shoulder.

"Be good." He chuckles at your stubbornness and allows a hand to rest on your lower back. "I'm trying to give you what you want, so would you just look at me."

You sigh, before you start peeling yourself, little by little, off of him.

He immediately notices the involuntary lift of your lips. "Ooh, look at that pout. Could've just told me you wanted a kiss, doll." He smirks, watching as you turn your head slightly to hide the scorch on your cheeks. It's not the main thing you wanted, but you weren't mad when he did pull you in for a kiss, because he started moving his hips again, the pace slow as your lips remained locked. That slow pace was how every one of these torturous cycles started out, but this time it was different. It was now harder to get what you wanted.

"Eyes on me, baby, or I stop."

"I can't- Please, Toji." You want to bury your face in the crook of his neck, again. You want to hide yourself from those eyes of his that never fail to make you feel vulnerable.

"Eyes on me... or I stop," he repeats, calmly, as if enduring all of these stops is such a simple task for both of you. You look at him, and immediately feel like you're being swallowed whole. You feel like he's eating you alive with just his gaze. The sweat beading on his forehead, the tint of color on his cheeks, the lust that simmers in his eyes… it's an insane visual. It's overwhelming.

He sees it, though. The way you try to still your bottom lip as it quivers, the way your chest spasms from holding it all in, your pleading eyes. It's all so... you. So fragile, so timid, so small. So beautiful.

"Good girl. Yeah... just look at me," he instructs, and you whimper. Your gaze falls to his chest as embarrassment floods you at light speed. Your hands reach out for him like they do when you're ready to wrap your arms around him again, but he intercepts them. The brief noise homed into Toji's ears, and rushed straight down to his dick. He can't afford to be deprived of your facial expressions when he now knows what your pretty voice sounds like when it's laced with need. "Fuck... again. Do it again, princess. I heard that loud and clear."

"P-Please. Please, let me go back." You test the strength of his grip, twisting your wrists in his hold. He responds by pushing your arms behind you, the edge of his palms grazing your lower back with every bounce of you on his cock.

"What did I say, baby? Huh? Lift your head and look at me." When you refuse to listen and keep staring at his chest, he decides to give you a countdown for when he's going to stop. "Three..."

"No! Okay, okay," you say, complying with lifting your gaze. Your pleasure skyrockets when you make eye contact with him. He gives you a little smirk, like he's proud of you for showing him that you'll always be good for him, even if you're stubborn about it.

"Shit, mama. You feel so fucking good. Might just cum before you, if you keep this up."

You moan at the threat and bite the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from looking away again. Every sound you let slip makes Toji pick up the pace of his thrusts. They're always precise, so with the speed rising, you think you might catch up to his pleasure. "Please, Toji. Please." The second plead comes out as a whine. "Please, i'm... um..." you hum, shutting your eyes briefly at the sensation of him prodding your sensitive spot again and again. "I'm..." Another whimper slips out.

"Yeah?" He murmurs, watching you struggle to finish your thought, through lidded eyes. "Get it out. All of it."

You're cracking. Your little moans are becoming more and more audible. "I'm trying." You gasp, the breath coming out shaky.

Toji is devouring all of it. His focus is unbreakable, and his thoughts of you are greedy. He wants more than what you're giving him. He wants you to be louder, he wants you to scream his name, he wants to make you cum so hard that you let go of all that embarrassment and moan freely for him.

He removes one of his hands from your wrists, keeping them restrained with his other hand, so that he can toy with your clit. The rush of pleasure makes you twitch above him, a sweet moan instantly released by you. You feel so flustered, you can't hold the sounds back as well as before. It's the unfaltering look he throws at you. He has no trouble holding eye contact with you.

He's obsessed with this show you're putting on for him. The way you're crumbling for him, slowly giving in and losing your tentativeness towards making sound. You remain overwhelmed by all of it. The heavy breathing, his groans, the rapid movement of his thrusts, his rough thumb stroking your clit, the way you're so lost in the pleasure of it all that you've become just as greedy as him, chasing even more stimulation by grinding your hips against him. It's a loud scene.

"T-Toji, Toji!" You gasp. "I'm- Oh!"

"Oh fuck. Cum," he growls. "Cum, pretty girl. Cum for-"

Your entire body is trembling on top of him. Loud cries fill the room as your orgasm washes over you, in the most unbelievably messy way. Toji is stunned, entirely speechless as he fucks you through this intense orgasm. Your back is arched in so much you think your spine might snap, and you can't for the life of you stop crying out his name. This is one of the most powerful orgasms he has pulled from you, if not the most powerful. Toji's lap is drenched, your ass and the backs of your thighs are wet. It's never happened this way before. Your mind is so clouded, you can't even think of what just happened.

Not even a minute later, Toji mirrors you in experiencing that feeling of pure ecstasy, heavy pants and groans released, carelessly, by him. His warm load is shot into you, adding on to the mess when it begins to drool out of you and down his length.

You're both breathless, left frozen in your positions for a good amount of time, while you think about what just happened. You come down from your blissful state first and can't even think to look at him. You pull your hands out of his weakened grip and rest them on your thighs and just stare at them until he says something. You don't know what to say, so you'll let him do the talking.

It was a heat of the moment type thing. Completely unexpected and he's shocked to say the least. It takes Toji a couple minutes himself to think of what to say, but ultimately, he thinks this is the best way to break the ice...

"You just squirted... all over me."

You don't even look up at him when he says that. You just might cry from the continuously skyrocketing level of embarrassment you're feeling.

"Do you have anything to say about it?" He asks, to which you just shake your head. He lets a couple seconds go by, just to add an unnecessary dramatic effect to the situation, before picking up the conversation again. "Well, good thing I have some things to say about it, pretty." He grins and wraps you up in his arms, allowing you to return to your safe space. "You know how much I love you, right?" He says, turning his head to look down at your face. You hum in response and nod against his shoulder. "And that I only pushed you so that you wouldn't hide your voice from me anymore?" You nod again. "Well, I was right." He smirks, thinking of how he got exactly what he wanted. "I'll leave it at that so you don't overheat on me."

He sighs, contentedly, at the feeling of you being so relaxed in his arms now, compared to before. "You did so well for me, mama," he says, before pressing multiple kisses to your head.

There's a beat of silence. Toji can't stop thinking of that spontaneous moment. It's stuck on loop in his head. It's not convenient in this moment, since you're cockwarming him, but before you know it, he's half hard inside you again.

"You think I can make you do it on purpose, this time?"

[lovelettersforthedamned]

i need to ride peters face.

like seeing him covered in my slick all dazed and shit has me on my knees for him

(im ovulating)

I Want To

✰ tasm!peter parker x afab!reader

✰ word count: 0.9k

✰ summary: peter loves to do all the work when it comes to making you feel good. but when he's been so good for you, you have to return the favor, right?

✰ warnings: fluff, language, smut, minors dni 18+ only, oral (f receiving), some kissing, face riding, cum eating, handjob.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

main m.list ⋆ peter parker m.list

⋆ gif by @dear-indies

Your hips were growing tight from the repeated rocking motion you’ve been maintaining, but were you going to stop? Absolutely not. 

Leaning on the headboard in front of you, your knuckles are white from your iron grip. The way Peter is lapping up your slick feels too good, causing you to moan into the wall in front of you. “F-fuck, Peter,” you gasp, reaching a hand down to entangle your fingers through his hair, “you’re doing such a good job, making me feel so good.” 

Peter can’t help but groan and buck his hips at your praise. You told him to keep his hands to himself before you started, and with his hands gripping the sheets under you, he’s kept his word. With each buck of your hips, he wanted to bring his hands to your thighs and massage the skin there. But with your threat of stopping if he does, he keeps his hands at his sides. 

Your futile effort of keeping your hips rocking falls short as exhaustion hits you like a train. You end up just planting yourself on Peter’s face as you take a deep breath, only for it to be stolen again as his lips find your clit and begin to suck. The space around you is silent besides the sounds of your occasional gasps and moans paired with the explicit noise of Peter devouring you like a man starved. 

Looking down, you take a look at the state of your boyfriend under you. His hair is a mess from your grip. His cheeks are pink, flushed from arousal; but that isn’t what catches your eye and brings you closer to the edge. Upon closer look, Peter’s nose, lips, and cheeks are covered in your arousal. He’s soaked in you. And he does not care one bit. 

This pulls you towards your orgasm. You throw your head pack in pleasure, screwing your eyes shut. When you open them, you turn your head and look behind you to see his cock standing straight up. He’s even slightly bucking his hips, desperate for any sort of touch where he needs it the most. His unapologetic way of making you feel good, makes him feel good.

Amid your pleasured daze, you reach back and begin to stroke him. His eyes snap open at the sudden touch before they roll to the back of his head. He starts to moan into your clit, the new buzzing sensation throwing you over the edge. 

All your muscles tighten as your orgasm sends sparks to every nerve in your body. You can’t hold yourself up as you cum. Peter senses this and brings his hands up to hold your waist, effectively keeping you from falling forward. 

As you come to your senses again, you look down at Peter, a big stupid grin on his wet face. You take a breath, “Holy…shit.” A laugh is shared between the two of you as he gently guides you to lie on the bed beside him. 

After a few moments of silence, you roll over on your side to drape your leg over his waist. As you get yourself settled, you hear him take a sharp deep breath, your eyebrows come together in worry and confusion. Looking over his body for any sign of injury, you look down at his cock. He’s still hard, his tip an angry bright red, his veins prominent. 

“I’m fine, baby,” he’d always tended to push aside his needs for the sake of yours, something you wish he did less, “I know you’re tired, so I’ll just figure…myself out.” You move your leg from his torso, leaning up further to give him a small kiss on his neck. You keep placing small kisses on his skin until you reach his lips. His lips are still wet from you. Brushing a piece of hair away from his eyes, he looks at you like you put the moon in the sky. 

A light giggle escapes your lips before you press them to Peters. Moaning into the kiss, he snakes his arm around your torso, pulling you in closer. His lips have craved you, even if they’ve been working on you for the past thirty minutes. 

While he’s lost in your kiss, you reach a hand down to his, now leaking, cock. He pulls away suddenly, “Bug, I told you that you don’t need to do this. I know you’re tired.” 

Pressing a soft kiss onto his lips, you respond, “What if I want to?” 

“Then I guess I can’t say no then, can I?” 

You shake your head before kissing him again as you begin to start your slow strokes on his cock. Peter’s so close already; teasing him for a while makes him so sensitive. Leaning back to let him breathe, you press more kisses to his jaw, watching the way his chest rises and falls as he gets closer and closer. 

You tilt your head to whisper in his ear, “Cum for me, my love.” 

With one last stroke, his seed spills onto your closed fist. Peter’s eyes are shut tight as he pulls you in closer to his chest, pornographic moans echoing through the room. You can’t help but smile at your boyfriend reveling in pleasure. 

Every time he cums, he always gets so sleepy after. And this time wasn’t an exception. His eyes remained closed as he nuzzled his face in your neck, soft snores leaving his lips. Pressing a chaste kiss into his hair, you sigh, before falling asleep yourself. 

✰ author's note: back on the smut grind (i think). lmk if you guys want me to do a small kinktober....EEEKK. don't forget to like, comment, and reblog if you enjoyed!! my ask box is open btw! come chat if you'd like!!! ok, ily bye !!!

[rebelfell]

I could tell you this is *really* it, but you’d never believe me… 18+, MDNI 1.7k

older!fem!Harrington!reader x eddie munson

cw: pregnancy/fertility discussions

continued from here, index here

“Did you want one?”

Eddie’s voice barely manages to break through the fog your mind had slipped into.

Tangled up with him in the softness of your sheets, cast in the scarlet glow of your scarf-covered lamp, body shiny with a sheen of sweat and your legs still trembling with the effects of the last few hours, it was a miracle your floaty, dopamine-addled brain had even heard.

“Huh?” you asked, lifting your head the full two inches you were able.

He lifts himself from his place between your thighs, where he’s been the last…twenty minutes? Thirty? It’s hard to say. Time has a tendency to stretch and expand when he’s in this mood. 

When all he wants to do is live down there—not even actively trying to get you off, just letting his tongue glide through your folds and play with your clit. Unhurried and engrossed.

Like he has all the time in the world.

Because at last he does.

It was hardly an ideal time to ask, Eddie knew that. But he hadn’t been able to get the question out of his head since earlier that afternoon. Even now, when he was smack dab in his version of heaven, he couldn’t put off the question he’d been wanting to ask any longer.

So he didn’t.

“Did you want one?” he asks again. And then, when your brow furrowed and your head started to shake in confusion, he adds, “A baby.”

“A…baby?” You repeat it slowly, pushing up on your elbows to look at him.

The doe eyes come out in full force as he looks up at you and nods. Round and open and so, so vulnerable it made your chest ache. Even with all the efforts he’d put into making himself look older—the glasses he’d been wearing more and more often, the beard that he was letting grow in—those eyes always gave it away that deep down he was still that scared, eager little twenty-something puppy come to life.

“Why?” you snicker. “You got a friend who can get one wholesale?”

“No,” he snickers back, smoothing his hand over your stomach. A little higher than where a baby would go, but you don’t tell him that. “I was just wondering if you, you know…wanted one.”

“Eddie, I…” You trail off, not quite sure how to answer. Because you’re slowly but surely starting to realize he’s not joking. With a hard swallow, you ask, “Is this about what you found?”

He doesn’t need to nod for you to know it is.

In the midst of clearing out the closet, making room for him to start bringing his stuff over and slowly move in with you over the last few months of his lease, he’d unearthed something.

It was just a shoe box, something that would typically be totally inconsequential. Something you’d stowed on the top shelf in the far corner the first night you spent in this house. Something that only came out for short intervals during particularly heart wrenching bouts of nostalgia.

You hadn’t labeled or decorated it. Hadn’t put anything on it to indicate just how precious its contents were. Nothing more than a tiny “E” in ballpoint ink on the bottom corner of the lid. 

Small enough to miss easily. But Eddie didn’t.

Inside, he found all his notes from that summer folded back up into triangles. A bottle cap from his favorite beer. A guitar pick he’d left out on the patio table one night you’d sat outside looking at the stars while he strummed “Going to California” on his acoustic. He’d had it stuck in his head for days, ever since you told him how Robert Plant and Jimmy Page wrote it for Joni Mitchell.

All the things you felt compelled to keep without fully understanding why.

Near the top were the more recent additions—the blood-stained rag you’d used to bind his hand the day he helped you move. Then the postcard from Berlin Steve sent you that mentioned his name. The envelope with the foreign postage he’d sent your bear in, a copy of Corroded Coffin’s CD.

And the outer packaging of a pregnancy test.

You hadn’t kept the stick itself. That had struck you as a bit too gross. But the box had lain in your wastebasket for weeks, staring at you from atop a pillow of used tissues and make-up wipes and q-tips and emptied toilet paper rolls. And when it finally came time to empty the basket, you found you couldn’t quite bring yourself to tie off the bag with it still sitting inside. 

So into the shoebox it went.

And when you came back up from downstairs, concerned by the sudden lack of thumping that had been near-constant all day, you found him sitting silently on the bed holding it in his hands.

You assured him it had been a false alarm. That the test was negative and that you promptly got your period just a few days after. That you opted not to tell him because you didn’t want him to worry, as you knew he would. That you knew he would have come running without a second thought. And as much as you wished he was there, you didn’t want to do that to him.

And he could understand all that. He really could.

But it doesn’t make him feel any less guilty that he wasn’t here. That he didn’t have a clue it was happening. And it doesn’t make him wonder any less what might have happened if the result had been different. Would you have told him then? Would you have wanted to keep it? Would you have asked his opinion, even knowing he would support whatever decision you made?

You could see his head was swimming with all these questions, getting lost in the whirlpool of them, and grabbed his face with your hands to pull his eyes to yours. 

Stop it, you told him solidly. You don’t need to feel bad about decisions we never had to make.

And you were right. He knew you were right. He didn’t need to worry about doing the right thing, because he could see it in your eyes that you knew he would have no matter what.

So the package went back in the box and the box went back in the closet. And you spent the rest of the day packing and sorting things into piles—toss, donate, storage—until half (okay, a little less than half) of the closet and drawer space was empty and ready for him.

You figured that was that. He didn’t mention it again or act remotely different as you sorted and talked and cleaned. Or when you finally showered and washed the layers of grime and sweat from your bodies only to crawl into the haven of your bed and fall into that easy and tempered, sort of languid lovemaking you both found you liked just as much as the urgent, desperate, carnivorous, animalistic kind of fucking you were prone to.

It wasn’t until he stopped to ask his question that you realized he was still thinking about it.

“Come up here,” you tell him, tugging loosely on a lock of hair by his ear.

And he does.

He slides up to lay beside you, head nestled in the crook of your neck, his breath fanning across your chest as he nuzzles his face against your chin.

You let your nails skim his back, trying to trace the shapes of tattoos you can’t see but know are there. The broadsword on his spine, the barbed vines that wrapped around his bicep, the D20 above his elbow and the bats beneath it.

“Do you want one?” you ask him after a long moment. Muted and wary.

He doesn’t respond right away, taking a beat to chew on his response. And you feel certain he can hear your heartbeat jump to an uneasy rhythm as you wait for his answer. Because what if he does? What if this is it? The moment you come to a real reason this can’t work—that he has dreamt his whole life of a family only to wind up with the person who can’t give him one?

“Honestly, I don’t know…but I’d love to give you one,” he answers solidly, “if that’s what you want. And I’d love there to be more of you in the world.”

“Ed,” you sigh, “I don’t even know if I can get—”

“What if we tried?” he asks, going on before you can dissuade it. “We don’t have to tell anyone we are, we can just…see if it happens. If it does, it does. And if it doesn’t, then…”

“Then what?” you ask quietly.

He shrugs, the corner of his mouth turning up in a smile. “Then I’d still have you.”

He rolls onto his elbow and looks up to see the tears just starting to burgeon in your eyes. His hand comes up to brush your temple, following the curve of your jaw that is clenched in thought. The touch of his hand seemingly melts all the tension there, almost like magic, and you feel yourself similarly melting—looking back at this man who loves you so deeply and definitively.

Because you would love nothing more than for there to be more of him in the world.

“So, when are we gonna start…seeing,” you asked with a shy smile. “Right now?”

Eddie’s eyes widened, the corners of his mouth twitching he was trying so hard not to break out in a stupid-big, beaming smile.

“Maybe not just yet,” he said, the mirth in his voice shining through.

“No?” you ask, your brows lifting in surprise. “How long are we waiting, then?”

“Well, that all depends…” He ducked back down and returned to nuzzling your neck, lowering his voice to a husky murmur in your ear. “...on when you wanna get married.”

You let out breathy chuckles in between the quick, zealous kisses he began to drop on your skin, the ends of his hair tickling as they brushed the side of your face and fell across your chest.

“Ohh,” you laughed, reaching to lace your fingers with his. “Are you gonna marry me, then?”

Eddie pulled back once more and grinned down at you, the skin around his eyes crinkling his smile was so wide, his expression alight and filled with the purest form of mischief.

“Baby, I thought you’d never ask.”

prev┃

Standin’ on a hill in the mountain of dreams, tellin’ myself it’s not as hard, hard, hard as it seems…

[universalitgirlsblog2]

💞🎀TRYING DOESN'T EXIST 💞🎀

There is no try , you either do something or you don't. You either believe that you already have your desires or you keep believing an illusion ( 3d ) . When you are living in the end , you don't need to " try " to manifest your desires. Stop "hoping" that you manifest your desires. Be certain that you will manifest your desire since you are a master manifestor. Stop " trying " to manifest your desires. YOU ALREADY HAVE THEM.

I just want to mention the story by Neville Goddard . This story was also mentioned in Solar's guide ( Creator's code ). Whenever you feel discouraged by the 3D , feel free to come on this post and read this story.

Neville wanted to go home to Barbados, but he didn’t have enough money to do so.“Live as though you are there,” Abdullah told him, “and that you shall be.”He then said to me, "As you walk through this door now you are not walking on 72nd Street, you are walking on palm lined streets, coconut lined streets; this is Barbados. Do not ask me how you are going to go. You are in Barbados. You do not say 'how' when you 'are there'. You are there. Now you walk as though you were there."Basically, Abdullah told Neville to mentally live as if he was in Barbados, Neville was physically in NYC but in his mind he kept living and thinking he was already in Barbados. Neville was getting impatient as he lived in the end for weeks, but still didn’t see results. Whenever he spoke to Abdullah about it, he’d give Neville the same advice again and again."On the 3rd of December I stood before Abdullah and told him again I was no nearer my trip. He repeated his statement, "You are in Barbados."On the 4th of December, Neville finally manifested going to Barbados and cash to help him get there. He did this by only acknowledging that he was in Barbados, and not paying attention to him being in NYC.He operated mentally as someone who already has his desire fulfilled. This is called living in the end.

I want to ask you , why are trying to go to Barbados when you are already in Barbados ? Trying implies lack. Whenever you are affirming , listening to a subliminal etc you aren't " trying " to manifest your desire since you already have it. Affirmations, listening to subliminals etc are your reminders that you already have your desire. You just need to accept that you already have your desires .Like Neville said , " You are already that which you want to be, and your refusal to believe it is the only reason you do not see it."

Here is a excerpt would like to include in this post , this excerpt is from the book " Think & Grow rich " by Napoleon Hill.

" When you attempt to plant an idea , if the subconscious already harbors a negative, trying to force the new idea has the reverse effect because the subconscious becomes obsessed with defending it's established negative idea. And the harder you " try " to do something , the more the subconscious resists and the more difficult it becomes .

Even the use of word try is warned against because it gives suggestion to the subconscious of a preconceived failure. The concept of "trying" implies an ongoing effort. You don't want to try. You want to succeed. If you ask your subconscious to help you " try " , it may do just that. It may help you try , but it will prevent you from succeeding- because if you did succeed , then it could no longer help you " try " , which is what you asked it to do. "

In conclusion , stop " trying " to manifest. Trying will get you nowhere. You already have your desires. All you need to do is remind yourself and accept that YOU ALREADY HAVE YOUR DESIRES.

[irisintheafterglow]

heartbreak is one thing, my ego's another

↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺ now playing: sabrina carpenter - "please please please"

summary: a school assignment leads you to team bofurin. a chance meeting in the cafe leads you to umemiya. where else will furin high lead you over the course of 5 days?

wc: 7.5k (lord have mercy)

cw/tags: umemiya hajime x gn journalist!reader, strangers to lovers, swearing/explicit language, brief canon-typical violence, blood, and peril, angst/fluff and injury hurt/comfort, ume's a gentleman but that gets tested lol

note: friends this is the longest thing i have ever posted here and i was really debating not posting it because i didn't like how it was turning out, but then i just pushed through the rest of it...and it became 7 thousand words.....ANYWAY really hope you enjoy !

likes, reblogs, and replies are always appreciated <33

— Day 1 of 5: “Please, please, please // Don’t prove I’m right” 

A glass bottle shatters on the sidewalk below you, shadowy figures scattering into dark alleyways like rats. You grimace at their sadistic laughter and silently thank your host for not living on the ground-level. The sound of a shaking spray paint can echoes in the empty street and you watch a messy hot pink insignia appear as it's drawn on a shop window. Damn. This was going to be a long five days. 

“Wait, you want me to do what?” 

“You’ll be staying with a high school friend of mine who owns a store in the area,” your journalism teacher continues, quickly scanning over a student’s document and grading it without blinking. She swipes to the next document, mechanically repeating the same process of grading it and moving on. She doesn’t stop to see the shock on your face.

“Ma’am, I don’t know–”

“You’ll be fine, just stick to the populated areas and don’t go out at night. If you want to, you could even befriend some of those Furin kids,” she says as she absentmindedly clicks away at her keyboard. “It’ll be good for you to report on something other than the mathletes team, for once.” At least the mathletes are safe, you think to yourself. A little awkward, but nowhere near the delinquents at Furin.

“Hold on, may I ask why I’m the one doing this?” You wring your hands nervously, glancing at the afternoon sun sinking outside the classroom window. “I don’t understand why you’re asking me–” 

“You want the full-ride scholarship, don’t you?” Her eyes are beady through the thin rims of her glasses. You fight the urge to shrink away from her piercing gaze, one that you never become accustomed to no matter how many times you’re subject to it. “Trust me when I tell you that the judges will not care how many times the mathletes lost, no matter how eloquently you write about it.” You let your skepticism show on your face. 

“But they’ll care about a bunch of boys that get into fights every day?” If she cares about your deadpanned comment, she doesn’t acknowledge it. 

“My friend told me once or twice that there’s more to those Furin boys than meets the eye,” she says before turning back to her screen. Your confusion is still obvious, but the only help your teacher gives you is an indifferent shrug. “It’s up to you. But if you want a competitive edge, you need to take more risks.” You exhale, weighing your options and ultimately deciding that your career was more important. 

“When do I start?” 

You begin your morning early on your first day in Makochi. After leaving your host’s apartment and staring at the graffiti-covered high school that was drowning in plant overgrowth, you abruptly turned on your heel and decided to observe the people on the busiest street. You had no interest in exploring Furin High School itself, only the effects of crime and constant fighting on the uninvolved citizens. You catch a group of boys wearing black jackets heading in the same direction as you and duck into the nearest cafe, hoping to wait them out and watch how they interact with the town. Across the street, the owners of the shop that was vandalized with the pink insignia scrub the paint from the glass. 

“Good morning.” A girl with short brown hair greets you behind the counter, gesturing for you to take a seat on one of the stools. You thank her and set your notebook down next to you, flipping through the menu when you feel her staring at you. “Are you new here?” 

“I’m in town for a few days,” you reply. Her demeanor is friendlier than you would expect from an area that sees so much violence. “I’m from one of the neighboring high schools.” The girl nods, placing a cup of water in front of you, along with a set of chopsticks. 

“Are you visiting family? We don’t get many visitors here, so I’m just wondering what a new face is doing in town,” she says, nodding when you point at the menu item you want for breakfast. 

“No family here; I’m actually studying the town for an assignment. My teacher thinks that if I write about this town, it’ll help me get a scholarship.” Her mouth opens in an ah of understanding and she ducks into the refrigerator to retrieve some eggs. An idea pops into your brain and you open your notebook. “While I’m here, do you mind if I ask you a few questions about Furin High?”

“Sure. Bofurin members eat here all the time.” Your eyebrows draw together and, unlike your journalism teacher, she understands and addresses your lack of knowledge. “Bofurin is the team that protects this town. It’s made up entirely of students at Furin High School. Actually, it’s a little funny that you stopped into here today, of all places, since–” 

“Kotoha!” The door flies open and the same group of boys that were behind you on the sidewalk corral into the cafe, the space suddenly too small for the number of people present. The source of the voice, a tall guy with bright white hair and coattails attached to his jacket, approaches the girl behind the counter with a blinding smile. “Did you miss me?” 

“No,” Kotoha deadpans, sending you a sympathetic look as more boys file into the cafe. “I was gonna say that you chose the one day Umemiya treats all his underclassmen to breakfast. Umemiya’s the leader, the tall idiot I was just talking to.” You grimace and begin to jot down what little information you’d learned about Furin, covering the side of your face with your hand and hoping none of the students question why you were there. It’s wishful thinking, unfortunately. 

“Oi.” You’re snapped from your brainstorming daze by a boy whose hair and eyes were two different colors. He was watching you write like you were plotting how to demolish the high school and you curse your luck for the millionth time that you picked the one cafe the Bofurin team frequented. “Who are you and why are you here?”

“Sakura, you can’t just say that to strangers. Tell them you’re sorry,” Kotoha, the girl behind the counter, chides. The boy’s cheeks turn pink and he turns away, muttering what sounds like a half-assed apology to you. “Don’t mind him,” she says to you with a warm smile. “He’s terrible around new people.” Sakura’s face twists into indignation. 

“No, I’m not!”

“Yes, you are. You got into a fight on your first day here, and school hadn’t even started yet,” points out another student with blonde hair sitting next to a boy wearing dangling earrings and an eyepatch. You’re quick to write down anything and everything you were hearing, picking up pieces of conversation from the tables around you. “Hey, what are you writing?” The question doesn’t come off as accusatory, but you shut your notebook anyways and guard it like a treasure chest. 

“It’s nothing. Just homework,” you force out. 

“Homework,” the boy with the eyepatch echoes. “So, you live around here?”

“They go to a neighboring highschool,” Kotoha explains before you have the chance to speak. “They’re actually here to study Bofurin.” All three boys turn to you expectantly, as if you were going to interview them on the spot. 

“I’m just here to observe,” you say quickly, rubbing the back of your neck. “I’m not here to interfere or get in your way or anything.” 

“Who said you would be getting in the way? I’m sure Umemiya wouldn’t mind–” 

“I wouldn’t mind what?” You jump, the same guy that called Kotoha’s name upon entering the cafe appearing like a ghost between you and the boys you were conversing with. “Have you three ordered yet? You need to eat! We have a big day today,” the person you assume is Umemiya instructs the boys. To your surprise, they’re quick to nod their assent and place their orders. “Good. Now, what was it I wasn’t going to mind?” 

“There’s someone here to study us,” the half-and-half haired kid mutters, pointing in your direction. Like before, the two other students scold him for his brashness. 

“Don’t say it like that, Sakura.” 

“It makes it sound like we’re animals in a documentary.” 

“Study us?” Umemiya ignores them and turns to you with a curious look. “Why?” Your face heats and you hastily close your notebook again, hoping that Kotoha would be done with your food soon so you could vacate the cafe and avoid it for the rest of your stay. 

“It’s for an assignment for school,” you reply hesitantly. 

“You don’t need to be so humble,” Kotoha calls over her shoulder from the stove. “You can tell them it’s for a scholarship.” The three boys next to Umemiya gape at you in awe, but you can’t help feeling the slightest bit embarrassed that you drew so much attention to yourself on your first day in town. You didn’t know much about the Furin boys except for their reputation as fighters, and you expected Umemiya to turn you away and kick you out on the spot. 

“I’ll be out of town in a few days, so you don’t need to–”

“You can shadow us.” What the hell did he just say? You blink at him, unsure if you hallucinated his words or if he actually said them. Umemiya’s face suddenly turns a shade redder and he turns to his three underclassmen, whispering uneasily, “That is the term for it, right?”

“I think so,” the blonde one whispers back. “Suo, you’re better with words. What does it–”

“You want them to follow you around and see how you guys work,” Kotoha says as she brings you your meal in a to-go container. “That’s what ‘shadowing’ means.” Umemiya thanks her with a thumbs-up before turning back to you. 

“What she said. Come with us as we go through our daily routines so you really understand what we do.” You start to stutter out a list of fake reasons why you couldn’t, something along the lines of getting in their way and needing to take a fish to the veterinarian. Umemiya doesn’t budge and sees through your nerves like glass. “You won’t be inconveniencing us at all, I promise. If anything, it’ll be good for more people to have an understanding of Bofurin.” 

“Yeah. If you just watch us from the outside, your writing’s not gonna be any good,” Sakura says bluntly. The two boys next to him flinch and cover their faces. 

“You should stop saying things like that, Sakura,” the boy with the eye-patch warns. 

“Like I said,” Kotoha mumbles in passing. “Don’t pay him any mind. He’s just like that.”

“So, what do you say?” Umemiya grins at you in a way that unwillingly makes your heart rate increase and, before your mind knows it, you’re nodding in agreement and he settles on the stool next to you. “Great! Before we start, do you mind if I ask you about yourself?”

—  Day 2 of 5: “I know I have good judgment // I know I have good taste”

It’s 7:00 am when Umemiya appears outside your door. 

“Good morning! Did you sleep well? I know yesterday was a lot, so hopefully we didn’t scare you too badly.” You rub your eyes and manage to give him a sleepy ‘good morning,’ trying to shake off the exhaustion after running around the previous day with Bofurin. The moon was hanging high by the time Umemiya dropped you off at your host’s apartment and you thought you were hearing things when he said he’d be back in the morning to pick you up. “We’re not gonna have time to stop by the cafe, so I picked up something for you to eat.” You open the small paper bag he hands you to find a pastry wrapped in a napkin, slightly squashed from the walk. “Do you have everything?” 

“Yes, I do. This is really nice of you Umemiya,” you say as you fall into step next to him. He shrugs and waves you off, but you catch the self-confident upturn at the corner of his mouth. Why you were staring at his mouth in the first place could not be waterboarded out of you. 

“Don’t mention it. What’d you think of yesterday? Oh, wait. Let me take this from you so you can eat.” Before you can stop him, he reaches over and carefully slides the strap of your bag from your shoulder and hoists it onto his. Surprised, you thank him again, something that you found yourself doing a lot since you met him. It wasn’t like you were trying to overstate your gratitude, Umemiya just kept doing things for you; on your first day, he did everything from crouching down to tie your shoe to herding you toward the side of the sidewalk, away from the busy street. So far, Bofurin was nothing like you’d previously imagined. 

“There’s a lot more structure in place than I thought there would be,” you answer, taking a few bites of the pastry. After Umemiya gave you a proper introduction to first-year class captain (and your self-proclaimed #1 skeptic) Sakura, he also introduced you to Suo and Nirei, the two boys that were with him. The rest of your first day was a flurry of meetings and broadcast announcements from the top of the school, mixed with an unexpected amount of pot transplanting on the roof. “I didn’t realize there would be such a clear hierarchy of power…or a community garden.”

“You thought we were just a bunch of kids who got into fights every day?”

“Yes–wait, no!” Your face burns while you backtrack and try to explain yourself. Umemiya doesn’t hear it and simply chuckles at your slip. “Okay, fine. Yes, I did think you were a bunch of kids that got into fights every day. But,” you pause, taking a look at the pastry in your hand. “There’s obviously more I need to learn.” 

“That’s alright,” Umemiya beams. The sun starts to peek over the roofs of the little stores and houses, painting Furin High golden as you approach. “That's why I’m here. Oh, and before I forget, give me your phone.” You watch as he dials his contact information in, even taking a picture of himself for the contact photo. “What do you think?” 

“Wow, you look great. Thanks for doing that for me.”

“Of course. Now you have a direct line to me in case you ever need anything!” He has a cute smile, speaks an unprompted voice in your head that you’re quick to silence. You’re about to tease him about being so friendly with strangers when you catch sight of a smear of hot pink running across the bricks beside you. Umemiya’s smile fades as you walk past the metal garage door of a food vendor, it too becoming the victim of the same pink marking you saw on your first night. 

“That’s the second one I’ve seen now.” His eyes are narrowed when you turn to him. He’s not focusing on what you’re saying; you can tell by the way the muscle in his jaw clenches that he’s running analyses like a supercomputer. “Do you have any idea who’s doing this?”

“There hasn’t been word of a pink team in ages, let alone one that has the audacity to come on Bofurin territory and claim it,” he says quietly.  

“They’re trying to take it from you?”

“Keyword ‘trying.’ Doesn’t mean they’ll be successful.” The darkness of his expression disappears in a blink and you’re met with a self-assured grin. “Ah, well don’t worry about it. We handle this kind of stuff all the time,” he reassures you, readjusting your bag over his shoulder and starting again down the sidewalk.  

“How often do you deal with stuff like this?” 

“Weekly, probably,” he shrugs and you make a mental reminder to write it in your notebook. 

“Are people just looking for a fight because you’re the strongest team, or is it something else?” Your mind momentarily brings you back to sitting across from the mathletes team in the school library, giving them food for thought and jotting down their responses. It was a little different, asking questions of Umemiya, but the familiar feeling of seeking answers is comforting muscle memory. 

“I don’t have a concrete answer for you, honestly,” he admits. “But, my theory is that people don’t like what we do here. We protect the town and discourage people from doing unethical things. People simply don’t like being told what they can’t do.” You nod, trying your best to remember everything he’s saying. It made sense why smaller teams would want to take down the most powerful team in the area, but the morality side and restricting the actions of others because they harm the townspeople was something you didn’t expect to also play into the situation. “Are you going to interview any other teams here?” You shake your head.

“I wasn’t planning on it. The answers that you’re giving me now are more than I could have hoped for,” you answer and you catch his satisfied smirk out of the corner of your eye. “Do you think I should study other teams?” 

“You don’t need to. You fit in better with us, anyway.” 

— Day 3 of 5: “Whatever devil’s inside you // Don’t let him out tonight”

Reports of the hot pink marking become more frequent the longer you stay with Bofurin, both for sightings on shop windows and shadows sneaking around alleyways just out of patroller’s lines of sight. The more teams Umemiya sent out to paint over the vandalism, the more sightings increased. To you, it was an indicator of growing tensions between Bofurin and surrounding, envious teams. 

To Umemiya, it was Wednesday. 

“We have a collaborative meeting with another team, Shishitoren, today,” he informs you on the walk from your host’s apartment to the school, your bag swinging weightlessly on his shoulder. “I’d like for you to join us, but it’s ultimately up to you.” 

“Do you have a history with them?” The team leader’s eyes space out and he blinks once, then twice, before coming back to the present. 

“Yeah…you could say that,” he chuckles. “Just don’t ask Sakura about his first one-on-one with them. He gets defensive.” You stifle a grin.

“Oh, did he lose?”

“He won, actually,” Umemiya corrects, equally as amused as you, “Which is the part he gets mad about, so you should probably steer clear of the subject all together.” You nod, interviewing Sakura being nowhere in your plans. “Suo and Nirei will be able to give you all the info you need, though,” he says quickly, mistaking your silence for discontent. “And of course, you could always ask me too.” He smiles at you and something in your brain short-circuits. 

Ever the professional, you try not to think about how nice Umemiya’s been to you when you arrive at the Ori, headquarters of Shishitoren. Steering away from the run-down screening room, you and Umemiya’s team climb up to the roof, where a group of guys wearing orange baseball jackets are waiting. 

“What took you so long? Breakfast is getting cold!” The team’s leader, Tomiyama, leaps from his seat on the ledge and bounds over to Umemiya. “Oh?” He pauses, looking you up and down before smiling brightly at you. “You brought your new friend, Ume!” You wave politely and introduce yourself, a little more relaxed with Umemiya at your side. 

“Smart,” comments whom you assume to be the second-in-command, Togame. He moves at a leisurely pace, barely even blinking as he lifts Tomiyama by the collar of his jacket and sets him at the other end of the meeting’s circle. “Our guys have caught at least three of their guys running surveillance on your side. Who knows what would’ve happened if you left your guest at the school alone.”

“Surveillance?” You frown, but Umemiya doesn’t look surprised. “And what do you mean, something could have happened?” 

“Rival members follow others around, learning their ins and outs,” Togame tells you. “Essentially what you’ve been doing, but uninvited. They’ve been getting pretty pissy about Bofurin lately, so they might’ve tried to use you as some kind of collateral if they knew Umemiya would be out.” The thought makes you gag, and the same discontent expressions can be found on all the occupants of the roof. 

“They’re not very nice, those guys,” Tomiyama pouts. “The ones we’ve questioned wanna take over your side, Ume.” So other teams want to take over Bofurin’s territory more often than Umemiya lets on, you think to yourself. Maybe not even on a weekly basis, but daily. 

“Did you let the guys you’ve questioned off the hook? Or you still have ‘em here?” Hiragi asks. 

“We don’t have any of them here, no,” Togame replies. “But we have a general idea of how they make their rounds and can probably catch a team or two when they start following Bofurin guys.” 

“Great,” Umemiya concludes with a single decisive clap. “Let’s go get ‘em.” 

“Alright, field trip time!” Tomiyama’s energy sends him practically bouncing off the walls. You pack up what little things you brought with you to the meeting and are ready to fall into step behind the guys, but Umemiya stops you with a gentle hand on your shoulder. 

“Yo, Kaji.” The lollipop-mouthed second-year pulls down his headphones to listen. “Take them back to the school. Don’t want them there in case things get ugly.” You open your mouth to protest, ready to fire off why it’s important that you see the good, bad, and ugly of Bofurin, but Umemiya silences you with a shake of his head. “Please go. I’m not changing my mind.” 

“Why don’t you want me to be there?”

“Like I said, things could get ugly–” 

“And,” you cut in, “I’m capable enough to run if I need to. You can trust me to get out of there on my own.” The tone of his reply is soft and patient, like it was for your own good that you didn’t go. 

“Maybe next time, okay?” You frown, disappointment twisting in your gut. “I don’t doubt that you can handle your own if things get bad. I just…don’t want you to see it if things get bad.” He runs a hand through his hair and the flex of his large bicep suddenly clicks the pieces of understanding into place. There was a reason why he was the head of Bofurin and respected by all these rowdy team members, whether they were on his team or not. Though you hadn’t seen him fight yet, there was a more dangerous side to Umemiya that existed with the kindness he’d shown you. He didn’t want you there in case things got ugly because of him. 

“I–I see.” He nods with a sigh of relief and turns to leave; you pull your arms close to your body at the sudden chill as he walks away. “Umemiya?” He pauses at the doorway, his hand hovering over the handle as he looks over his shoulder at you expectantly. Several things occurred to you to say to them, all of them borderline condescending if he took it the wrong way. Don’t do anything brash. Make sure you come back. You shouldn’t need to use your fists for this. 

“Be safe, please,” is what you settle for. 

— Day 4 of 5: “Everyone makes mistakes // But just don’t”

You’re past the halfway point of studying Furin High and team Bofurin when Hiragi storms into the broadcast room, grumbling about being out of supplies. Umemiya isn’t worried and reassures his friend that they would have what they were missing by the end of the day. Four days of immersing yourself in Bofurin was having a significant effect on you, since you volunteer to do the run before anyone else does. 

To be fair, you did need to run back to your host’s apartment–who had so graciously started letting Umemiya in while he waited for you to get ready in the morning–because you’d forgotten to drop your notebook in your bag before rushing out the door. The list wasn’t huge, either, and you figured you could do the whole trip in about an hour: painkillers (Nirei misjudged his spacing and accidentally got kicked in the crotch), small bandages (Sakura, self-explanatory), wet wipes (Suo noted how dirty the desks became because of everyone’s shoes), and a few packages of plant food (Umemiya insisted on buying some potted flowers from the vendor on your street).

“Are you sure? One of the patrol teams can pick the stuff up,” Umemiya offers, eyeing you oddly. Four days of immersing yourself in Bofurin meant you also caught the team’s head staring when he thought you weren’t looking, and then quickly turning away when you looked back. “Or, if you go, let me send one of the class captains with you, just in case. Sakura should be on patrol in the area.” You shake your head and stand up to leave. 

“I’ll be fine, Ume, I promise.” The nickname slips out before you can stop it, but he doesn’t seem to notice, eyebrows drawn in concern as he watches the floor. You lightly rest your hand on his shoulder and he snaps out of it, exhaling through his nose before nodding, reluctantly. 

“Call if anything happens,” Hiragi grunts before turning to Umemiya. “Hey, weren’t you talking about giving them a–”

“Hiragi, you’re a genius,” Umemiya cuts in and moves to dig through a box at the corner of the room. “Hey, wait,” he says, gently catching your wrist before you’re out the door and pressing a jacket into your hand. Four days of immersing yourself in Bofurin, and you would know the jacket’s green collar and the insignia anywhere. “No one should bother you if you’re wearing it.” 

Ironically, absolutely nothing happens until you’re on your way back from the convenience store. Your host was waiting for you in the living area to give you your notebook, and the store was barely a block away from her apartment. You find the needed items easily, placing a bag of mixed hard candies and a box of new chalk into your basket because you noticed they were running out. It’s a perfect day as you walk back to Furin, all cloudless skies and cool breezes and smooth sidewalks. The Furin jacket fits snugly on your torso, sturdy enough to protect you from the chill in the shade but light enough that you don’t overheat from the sun. It’s nice, something you could get used to. 

You don’t realize they’re behind you until it’s too late. 

“So, you’re Bofurin’s bitch, huh? Nice to see you in the light.” You stop in your tracks and look behind you to see a dozen guys in hot pink team uniforms you don’t recognize. There shouldn’t be that many of a rival team on Bofurin grounds, right? What the hell were they doing here? 

“You gonna say something, or are you stupid as you are ugly?” 

“Aww, look at them. They’re shaking and they don’t even know why,” one of the guys in the front sneers. “Don’t worry, sweetie. We’ll give you something to be scared of.” The group starts to approach you and your vision slows like everything was moving through syrup. You catch the symbol on their uniforms, the same one that’s been spray painted on the town’s buildings for the past few days. The encroaching team was trying to take you to get leverage over Bofurin. Not good. Definitely not good. 

“Umemiya’s gonna think twice about messing with us after they see how we mess up his little pet!” Umemiya. You need to get to Umemiya. Your senses come back to you like a freight train and you have half the mind to dig your shoes into the street and run. 

The rival team shouts after you and the sound of pursuing footsteps thunder down the road. With one hand gripping the plastic bag of supplies, you yank your phone from the jacket pocket and frantically swipe to his contact. Your assailants draw closer and you force more energy into your legs, barely outrunning them by a few seconds. You cut through an alleyway and round a corner, but a dip in the road simultaneously makes you trip, pain shooting through your ankle. Shit! Your finger misses the ‘call’ button on your phone and you tap the ‘send location’ button instead. It’s not what you were going for, but your only options were to stop to properly call for help and get caught or keep running on your tweaked ankle. With the group of guys racing around the corner to catch you, you have no choice but to keep running. 

“Get the hell away from me!” You skid to a halt and turn to face the team head-on, your voice unsteady and breathless. You were finally starting to recognize the buildings around you; at the same time, your lungs were aching unbearably. Your pursuers slow to a halt and you’re stuck in a standoff in the middle of the street, the townspeople shutting themselves away in their stores to minimize damage to their own livelihoods. You stumble backward when the team leader steps forward, a cruel grin covering his entire face. 

“C’mon now, we just wanna have a little chat with you, you being Bofurin’s newest addition and all.” The men behind him leer at you, swinging their bats and crowbars up onto their shoulders. 

“Take one step closer and all of Bofurin comes running,” you snarl, shoving your phone forward, your finger hovering over the ‘send location’ button.

“That’s a whole lotta bullshit spewing out of your mouth, sweetie.”

“Why don’t you shut yours, asshole?” You spit. Sure the phone was a bluff, a last-ditch effort to stall for time.

It didn’t matter.

You knew how quickly Bofurin organized. 

As the hot pink leader lunges the remaining distance between you two, he’s knocked to the side by a blur of black, green, and white. Sakura stands up straight, rolls his shoulders, and scowls at you. 

“Why didn’t you call us sooner, dumbass?” 

“What, you think I wanted to get chased down today?” You meet his attitude with your own irritation and exhaustion. “Why didn’t you get here sooner?”

“Just go somewhere safe, idiot,” he yells, slamming his fist into an attacker’s face. “Your boyfriend’ll be here soon, but we were closer when he messaged everyone!” You don’t have time to think about the idea of Umemiya texting all of Bofurin to descend upon your location.Your glare fades quickly into relief and you step backward as Suo and Kiryu launch themselves into the fight.  Kaji and Hiragi rush in within a minute, and you’re spun to face Umemiya before you register that he’s there. 

“Are you okay? Are you hurt? Did they hurt you?” He searches your face, his anxiety evident. “What did they do to you?”

“I’m okay, I’m okay. They didn’t get me.” Your voice wavers when you try to put weight on your injured ankle, and it panics Umemiya even more. Other Bofurin members enthusiastically join the brawl, but all Umemiya can do is take your hands and scan your body, letting you use him to balance on your good foot. 

“They were chasing you? I knew I should have–” You give him a tired smile and pull his face up to meet your eyes. 

“I didn’t let them catch me. I’m safe, I promise.” He inhales like he’s about to say something, but his attention snaps behind you, his expression hardening in an instant. He slips in front of you like a shield and brings his forearm up to block the hand that was meant to grab you while you were distracted. He throws the attacker to the ground and it lies still, completely unconscious. 

“Hey!” The sound of Umemiya’s voice echoes in the street. The chaos stills, fists suspended in mid air. His eyes that looked so kindly on you darken into shadows, shutting out the sunlight and sending chills down the backs of everyone present. “Not enough to kill…” he orders, securing an arm around your waist and turning you away from the fighting, leaving his underclassmen to finish the job. “But enough.”

You’re a sweating mess and barely able to put weight on your ankle by the time you make it through the doors of Bofurin headquarters. You fall away from his supportive body and your shoulder hits the wall, stars scattering in your vision. Any attempt to drag yourself further, with or without Umemiya’s help, earns you nothing but a hiss and a white-hot flash of pain. Umemiya looks distraught, reaching forward and pulling back with indecisive uncertainty. 

“What do you need me to do? Tell me what to do and I’ll do it,” he pleads with you. “Please, tell me what you need.” 

“Water,” you croak, your voice hoarse and tired. “I just–I can’t–I can’t walk well–” Your feet leave the ground before you can comprehend that you’re in the air, Umemiya’s arms effortlessly lifting you and beginning the ascent up the school’s stairs. His body is steady and he barely breaks a sweat, stone-cold determination his only expression. Your decreasing heart rate pounds in your forehead and you squint against the light once he climbs to the roof. He sets you gently on a chair in the shade before retrieving a bottle of water, watching as you take a few sips before kneeling in front of you. 

“May I?” You blink, regaining your senses, and realize he’s asking if he can inspect your ankle. You hum, settling into the chair while he carefully rolls up the cuff of your pants. His fingers brushing your bare skin momentarily makes you forget any pain, a shock of lightning shooting up your spine as he swipes his thumb over the front of your ankle. He turns your leg over gently in his hands before deeming it okay. “It’s not swelling, thankfully, so it’s probably just a bad sprain at most.” He exhales, deeply relieved, but continues to run his fingers carefully over the tender area. 

“You couldn’t have predicted they would be there,” you say, his thoughts painted all over his face. 

“I didn’t say anything,” he mumbles, more irritated than you expected. He’s just mad at himself, not at you, you need to remind yourself.  

“You didn’t need to.” Your hand reaches itself out on its own accord, turning his face so you could meet his eyes. “I didn’t get hurt because of you.” 

“But you did get hurt,” he mutters, eyebrows drawn the same way as when he was analyzing the pink symbol a few days prior. The cogs in his brain were turning, you could see, but this time there was a lingering sense of shame. “I’m sorry I couldn’t keep you safe.”

“I’m here with you, aren’t I?” He shrugs, but you catch the muscle in his jaw relax as his eyes soften. “If that’s not safe, then I don’t know what is.” 

“You’re not angry that I wasn’t there sooner?”

“I’m safest when I’m with you,” you state simply, “and you found me at just the right moment. So no, of course I’m not angry with you.” Words slip out of Umemiya’s mouth before he’s able to register that they’re leaving, but he has half the mind to change the middle part of the sentence before he comes off as too overbearing. 

“I…care about you, deeply.” You smile, letting him take your hand into his own and press his lips to the inside of your palm. 

— Day 5 of 5: “We could live so happily // If no one knows that you’re with me”

It’s 7:00 am and Umemiya isn’t outside your door. 

You curl up on your bed and stare out the window, the street below milling with its usual morning business. After he dropped you off the previous night with a curt ‘sleep well’ and a reminder to ice your ankle, you were left in an eerily quiet bedroom while you tossed and turned thinking about the day’s events. A ring of the doorbell sends you hobbling down the stairs and throwing open the front door, only to be met with a very pink Sakura, flanked by Suo and Nirei. 

“Don’t go outside today,” Sakura says bluntly. Nirei flinches and Suo’s smile becomes slightly strained, both of them eyeing their class captain warily. 

“What he means,” Suo says before Sakura can say anything else, “is that you don’t need to come study Bofurin today.” Your heart sinks. This must have been because of the day prior. He was really mad that you got yourself hurt, huh? 

“Don’t look so sad about it,” Sakura mutters, his cheeks turning a slightly darker shade of red. “It’s annoying.” You stutter an unexpected apology and suddenly have the urge to hide back in your room until your train the next day. 

“I get it,” you say quietly. “He’s angry with me. Please give him my thanks for the hospitality he’s shown me this week. I’ll be gone by 8:00 tomorrow.” You move to close the door when all three boys practically throw themselves in the way. 

“Wait, that’s not what we meant!” Nirei’s eyes are the size of basketballs. 

“Please don’t listen to anything Sakura is saying; he has a hard time empathizing with others.” Nirei nods enthusiastically in agreement with Suo, slapping a hand over Sakura’s mouth to prevent the boy from speaking. “Really, that’s not what we mean by saying you don’t need to study us anymore.” 

“Umemiya wants you to take the day to rest,” Nirei explains quickly. “He doesn’t think you should be walking to and from the school on your injured ankle.” Your sadness is replaced with indignancy and you cross your arms over your chest. 

“He couldn’t have told me this himself?” 

“He would, but…” Nirei’s voice trails off and you catch Suo biting the inside of his cheek. Sakura’s the first to break the silence, peeling Nirei’s hand from his face. 

“Umemiya and the upperclassmen have been beating the shit out of those hot pink assholes since last night.” 

“It must’ve been pretty serious, since he didn’t even allow Suo or Sakura to go with them,” Nirei adds, “And they’re some of the best fighters in our class.” 

“How long has he been out?” 

“Hiragi said he called them late last night and a small team raided the hot pink team’s base.” That would mean Bofurin raided the base immediately after dropping you off. Why would he hide that from you? “Technically, he said not to tell you because he knew you’d panic,” Sakura continues. “So he sent us to tell you to take it easy. Don’t stab the messengers.”

“It’s ‘don’t shoot the messengers,’ Sakura,” Suo corrects and Sakura shrugs, indifferent. 

“And we’re already as good as dead anyway,” Nirei says, his expression dropping. “We weren’t supposed to tell you that he’s been fighting those guys that hurt you.” 

“It’s Sakura’s fault for yapping–”

“You wanna fight?”

“What’s done is done, little brothers.” You stiffen, blinking against the morning sun as Umemiya trudges into your vision. His handsome face has seen better days, small cuts and bruises littered all over his skin. He tossed his jacket over his shoulder, revealing the dirtied white shirt that wasn’t stained the previous evening. He rolls a broad shoulder and stretches his neck from side to side, his underclassmen scurrying away as he steps onto the welcome mat. “G’morning,” he greets in a tired voice. “Sorry I’m late.”

“Better late than never,” you deadpan, taking his hand and guiding him inside. “Thanks boys,” you call over your shoulder at the sheepish underclassmen. “I’ll take it from here,” you finish before shutting the door. 

“Gotta say, this place looks better when my vision isn’t blurry,” Umemiya jokes with a wince, collapsing into a chair at the dining table. You ignore his attempt at humor, retrieving the first aid kit from the closet along with a rag that you soak with warm water. His eyes are on you as you move about; you feel his gaze burn into the back of your neck. 

“If you weren’t already beaten to a pulp, I’d slap you,” you mumble, sitting across from him and gently patting the dried blood from his face. 

“And I’d let you,” he manages to smile, never taking his attention away from you. You can’t tell if your face is hot from his intense stare or from the anger bubbling in your stomach. Scooting closer, you start work on the cut above his lip, just missing his nose. “You smell nice.” 

“You need to stop talking.” His smile fades only slightly, his eyes ever watchful while you take care of his wounds. You hope he can’t tell how badly your hands are shaking as you tap antibiotic ointment onto his skin and cover it with a bandage. 

“You’re upset with me,” he says carefully, observing the way you’re conveniently avoiding eye contact. 

“You just figured that out?”

“You gonna tell me why, or are you just gonna keep scowling?”

“This is not how you usually do things,” you say through gritted teeth, gesturing to the evidence of fights all over his body. “You’re diplomatic. You’re understanding. You’re empathetic. You don’t…You don’t solve problems like this!” You don’t realize how loud your voice has become until you register the echo from the empty walls, nor do you realize that you were standing until his eyes were looking up at you. 

“How do you know that I don’t do this?”

“Because I watched you this week and I know how you work.” You swallow thickly. “I don’t know why you’d break all of that just because of some hot pink bastards running around your–”

“I did it because of you,” he says. “I did it because they hurt you.”

“You didn’t need to do that, Hajime.” It’s the first time you’d used his first name and something flutters in Umemiya’s stomach. He can’t do anything but stare at you in awe, watching as your emotions start to escape down your face in wet streaks. His body moves on its own, reaching out to wipe your tears to the side and standing so that your chests are nearly touching. His voice is barely a murmur, reserved only for you to hear. 

“You didn’t want me to do it?” Both your hearts are racing, slamming against your rib cages. 

“If it meant you getting hurt like this, then no.”

“I’d put myself through much worse if it meant you were safe,” he whispers. In this proximity, your anger flies out the window, along with your good judgment. He was so close, you could just–

“What else would you do for me?” His eyelashes flutter against yours. 

“Anything.” Umemiya thinks he has a broken rib from how little he can breathe. 

“Show me.” It’s like a rubber band snaps between your bodies as he finally leans down to kiss you, molding himself so that you could perfectly melt against him. His grip on your waist is rock-solid, holding you close enough that you feel him shudder when you scratch against his undercut. The sound you make when he swipes his tongue against your bottom lip makes his head go completely empty, the same feeling happening for you when his fingers graze the spot where your neck meets your chin. He kisses you feverishly, refusing to let you breathe until you’re forced to pull away lest you completely lose consciousness. 

“Do you always kiss the people you write about?” He winks at you and you roll your eyes, draping your arms over his shoulders. 

“Only the ones I fall for,” you whisper back. “I’m still mad at you for ditching me this morning, though.” 

“I sent your three favorite underclassmen instead,” he argues but you shake your head, a smile teasing your mouth. “Fine. How can I make it up to you?” You hum thoughtfully, blinking at him in a way that sent Umemiya’s mind into a frenzy. 

“Kiss me again and we’ll call it even.” 

“Whatever you say.” 

— Day [???] of [???]: 

He’s waiting for you when you step off the train, a dazzling smile on his face that grows when he sees the certificate awarded to you with your scholarship funds. A dozen captains dot the platform, diligently watching the back of their leader as he brings down every guard he has and catches you in his arms. After enduring Umemiya talking their ears off, the silence that falls over the area as you bask in each other’s presence is enough of a reason to switch formations, allowing you time alone with the one man who would put himself through hell if it meant you were still his. 

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

[prettieinpink]

5K SPECIAL | CREATING YOUR OWN GARDEN𝜗𝜚

This is a guide to make your mind like your own garden flourishing with plants, flowers and butterflies. Having a good mental mindset, and being in the right state of mind is essential to being the best version of yourself.

This guide is divided into four sections: mindset, self-care, mental wellness and emotional intelligence. I hope you can take away something useful and take care of yourself! 💖 

MINDSET

Your mindset can easily determine how you go through life. It influences how you feel, act, behave and your thoughts. When you have a poor mindset, it is going to be difficult to go through life, even if your life is easy. 

However, once we grow and improve our minds, it is easier for us to navigate life, improve our well-being and increase our chances of success. 

Before we get into mindset shifts, I want to explain how exactly you can implement them in your life. I feel like there’s so much talk about mindset, but no one exactly explains on how to implement them. 

IMPLEMENTING 

The first thing to implementing mindset shifts is making a conscious effort to be aware of your thoughts. If you want, practice mindful activities to improve your self-awareness of your thoughts. 

You have to be able to catch a thought in its passing and whoosh it away from your mind. If you don’t whoosh it away, those simple thoughts build each time which can soon turn into the way you think.

Secondly, after increasing your awareness, identify what exactly about your thoughts or mindset you’d like to shift, and what you would like to shift to.

Thirdly, is to completely immerse yourself in that mindset shift. The mind learns through repetition, meaning that repeating it enough will make your mind learn it. 

Set your mindset shift as your weekly intention, say affirmations, and prayer, read books on it, put a quote on your phone as your wallpaper, just make it so that mindset shift is constantly on your mind. 

Lastly, do small actionable things that reinforce that mindset shift. I recommend you do at least one habit every day for this. 

This is not the only method to implement mindset shifts, but for me, it’s the one that is highly effective. I recommend doing some research on your own, and making adjustments when needed depending on how you think. 

MINDSET SHIFTS

This whole part we’ll talk about the mindset shifts I think everyone should at least try to implement in their lives if they want to improve themselves. These mindset shifts are my absolute favourites and they improved the quality of my life. 

After each one, I’ll state a small habit you can incorporate that contributes to that shift. 

Live your life with your highest self in mind. 

This is more intentional living than an actual mindset shift, but still as important. Whatever you do throughout the day, consider if it aligns with your highest self. If not? Release it. Your highest self knows what's best for you, trust them. 

At the end of the day, reflect on your daily habits, which include all habits you did today whether they were ideal or not. What habits aligned with your highest self and which didn’t? The ones that didn’t, why? How can you change or remove this habit to get closer to your highest self?

Rejection is just redirection.

As someone who has gotten rejected from the things that they wanted and felt so lost in the pursuit of fulfilment, this mindset shift saved me. You have to stop chasing the things that aren’t meant for you if life has proved it isn’t.

While I’m not saying give up after the first try, but try to step back and assess the situation. If you are qualified and ready for this thing, then why is it still not yours? Because it isn’t meant for you. God is trying to nudge you into a different path, recognise his signs. 

To handle rejection better, look for the lesson(s) you’ve learnt, and the skills you grew and see if there is another area of life that you can apply them to. 

Keep yourself on a pedestal.

I am worthy so much to me. It sounds like a weird sentence, but you should start treating yourself like a treasure and avoid giving out that same treatment to most people because you have your soul, which homes itself in your body. Every day, you are living through this soul and body. 

So, why would you take care of someone else’s soul and body? You are never going to be the soul that lives in their body, or the body which homes their soul. Don’t neglect yourself in the priority of someone else. 

Practice setting boundaries with others and recognising when someone wants more than what you’re willing. 

You choose the life that you want.

You have choices and options every day to do things that will eventually have an outcome. Whether this outcome supports the vision of your dream life or not, all depends on how you choose to live your life now.  

I don’t have a habit with this one but keep in mind that absolutely nothing is controlling you, and your choices are of free will. Circumstances can change, but that is why we have to adapt and be flexible.

Fear is a step to success

If you’re not scared, you’re not doing it right. Fear can hold us back, but that is why we have to twist fear into a source of motivation instead. If we were always in our comfort zone, stepping back when we feel a sliver of fear, we allow fear to dictate our life and its course. 

You can’t be successful unless you do the uncomfortable. For this one, do something each day that scares you or makes you uncomfortable. It doesn’t have to be anything extreme, but simple things like exercising longer than usual or talking to someone who you wouldn’t imagine yourself with. Those little risks are so important. 

Embarrassment is not a real emotion 

This one is a bit controversial, but I do not believe in the concept of embarrassment. Yes, things can sometimes be awkward, but it is fully in your control if you want to feel ashamed or not. Being embarrassed only holds you back, and doesn’t allow you to live life to its fullest. 

I would recommend doing a small risk every day as well, but of things that would usually feel awkward. 

Progress over perfection/completion

Perfectionism which is allowed to be nurtured over time can create an avoidance mindset towards doing harder things in life. While we should strive for excellence in everything we do, we shouldn’t allow it to consume us. 

(the avoidance mindset is when we put off/avoid tasks that we believe to be out of our abilities, and so that completion of the task is poor quality/not done well.) 

This one is less common, but I know a few people who would not do a task if they knew it would not be fully completed in their desired time frame. However, each minute of work contributes to the results or completion of something. 

Every day, do one thing that will add up to the completion of your long-term goals. 

To welcome tomorrow, you have to let go of yesterday. 

Living in the past makes us neglect our present self. I’m not saying forget everything that’s happened, but never allow the past to consume your mind. Acknowledge that you’ve been hurt, you’re longing or you were happier. Then, release it. 

Journaling is the perfect way to stay in touch with the present. You can type it, write it, vlog, draw, or compose to journal. 

Everyone has their beauty.

This one helped me a lot with comparison. I saw beauty, not as a measure or a value of someone, but rather something that everyone has uniquely and it cannot be valued. I have my sense of beauty, and you have your beauty as well. We are two different people with unique features, traits and qualities, so our ‘beauty’ can’t be measured against each other. 

Define your beauty. You could be smart, feminine, book beauty or dark, flowers, creative beauty. You add your details to your beauty and never try to define someone else's. 

To conclude this section, your mindset is very powerful. To achieve your goals, work on your mindset. Also, don’t try to work on more than one mindset shift at a time. Implement one fully then work on the next one. It could be overwhelming if you’re doing more than one. 

SELF-CARE

The next chapter of this guide is about self-care. Self-care is important for maintaining balance in our lives and generally keeping ourselves happy. However, most people don’t understand the concept of self-care, so they just end up doing a bunch of random things and wondering why they don’t feel better.

Yes, you can coddle or pamper yourself when you want, but it is not self-care. While activities from these three things do overlap, do not confuse the terms with each other. 

Self-care is simply what it says. Taking care of yourself. Taking care of yourself looks different for everyone. My idea of self-care will be different to yours.

REDEFINING SELF-CARE.

When you imagine what self-care looks like, it’s typically someone else’s definition of self-care which has been reinforced in your mind. You have to redefine your idea of self-care to match your goals, energy levels and circumstances. 

Before you do, self-care is not always about taking a break. It seems that way, however, self-care can also be having the discipline to do the things that you don’t want to, but are good for you. 

Here are some questions to help you redefine your self-care:

What does self-care mean to you? Does that meaning align with your current values and needs? 

Do you have any negative associations or misconceptions of self-care? Why?

How do I feel in all areas of my life? (physically, mentally, spiritually, professionally). What areas need more attention and how can I improve that area(s)?

What activities bring me happiness, fulfilment and a sense of renewal? 

What tasks do I have to do, which are good for me but I hesitate in completing that task?

How would I like to feel after complementing my self-care rituals? 

Envision your life if it had complete balance and self-care incorporated. What habits would you be doing to support that vision? 

My idea of self-care is completing all of my non-negotiables, maintaining a healthy lifestyle, taking somewhat productive breaks and talking to others daily. 

THE SEVEN PILLARS OF SELF-CARE 

Self-care has seven pillars, which you all need to take care of to have a balanced life. However, balanced self-care does not mean equal attention to each pillar. It means that each one is up to the same standard of self-care you’ve put for yourself. So, you need to allocate your attention appropriately. 

MAJOR PILLARS 

Physical - The well-being of your body. 

Mental - The state of your mental health, mind and emotions. 

Spiritual - The strengthening of your relationship with God while nourishing your holy spirit. 

Personal - Doing things that bring you enjoyment and fulfilment + embracing your identity.

MINOR PILLARS

Social - Connecting with friends, family or even strangers.

Professional - Your work/school life. 

Environment - Keeping your space clean and extracting anything that holds you back. 

Major and minor do not add or take away the value each category has, it just means that major pillars may need more attention compared to the minor ones which may need less attention. Of course, you may need to focus more on a minor pillar, as self-care is individual to you. 

I would’ve added a list of things that you could do for each category, but I want you to think about what you need for each instead of relying on strangers with different lives for self-care. 

Maybe you need to focus on exercising and doing your hobbies more. Or you need to create a better work/life balance for yourself. It all depends on your values, needs and circumstances. 

MENTAL WELLNESS

Mental wellness is the state of our cognitive, emotional and psychological functioning. When we are mentally well, we can cope better with challenges, develop a habit of having positive thoughts, and greater happiness and improve most areas of our lives overall.

There are a lot of things that contribute to our mental wellness, and I most likely won’t have everything here. Just a little disclaimer as well, it is completely normal to have a fluctuating mental state especially when we are going through unfavourable change. 

DIGITAL MINDFULNESS

Social media is a huge part of our lives but is also the main factor of mental destruction. I’m not going to say delete all of your social media, but I want to introduce to you a few ways to mindfully consume and rules with managing screen time. 

MINDFUL CONSUMPTION

To consume content mindfully, go onto apps intentionally and know what your purpose is when using that app. For example, if you want to find new habits that you can do, you could search on Tumblr or if you want a quick break from something stressful you can watch an episode of something on Netflix. 

It doesn’t matter what the purpose exactly is, but the action of being intentional. 

After you consume what you want, download images, and screenshots, and take notes or any documentation of what you found/learnt. This is more so the information is remembered/used. 

Manage your notifications. You do not need notifications from every app. Except for messages and phones, I do not put notifications on my device. I believe that if something is important enough, I’ll remember to check my phone later without the help of a notification. 

Only consume quality content. It is so easy to consume content that has obviously been reposted or is blatantly spreading misinformation. Only consume from people who you trust and you’ve followed/subscribed to. While yes, you can explore but be very mindful when doing so.

You should be decluttering, organising and deleting on your devices routinely.  This reduces the amount of distractions on your phone and makes it more intentional. Only keep the things that align with your needs, values and goals. 

DIGITAL BOUNDARIES

Have rooms or zones in the house in which you’re not allowed to use any devices or the devices you choose. For example, the bed, bathroom, office, when you’re eating at the dining table, etc. 

An alternative is having a period of a day when device usage is not allowed. It could be right after you wake up, right before you go to sleep or just in the middle of the day. Either, I recommend you have a time or place in which device usage is not allowed.

While I encourage everyone to keep up with socialising with their loved ones and friends, I don’t support dropping everything just to talk to someone. E.g If somebody wants to text while you’re in the middle of a study sesh, just say you’ll talk later. 

MANAGING STRESS

Stress is an unwelcome yet common feeling we all have. No matter what’s on your plate, we tend to stress a lot, especially in a society that is going so fast and makes us feel like we’re falling behind. 

To manage stress, you need to be self-aware of when you feel stressed. A lot of people actually can’t recognise when they feel stressed, and I am one of those people. Instead, I rely on mental or physical signs that tell me I’m feeling stressed out. 

SIGNS OF STRESS

Unusual lack of motivation or discipline

Feeling tired constantly even if haven’t done anything exhausting

Inconvenience impacts you more

Overthinking about small things

Trouble with sleeping

Low appetite

Focusing is harder

Crying or feeling tearful over small things

This is not the complete list of symptoms, but these are the things I feel/do when I feel stressed. Stress will look different for everyone, so you need to be able to create your own list of signs when you feel stressed. 

CREATING A STRESS MANAGEMENT PLAN

Creating a plan helps you to be prepared to effectively address and cope with stress. It allows you to be more productive and improves mental health when you use this plan when needed. 

Here are a few steps to creating your own!

Identify stress triggers. What do you dread the most? What makes you feel drained? What do you overthink about? Answer these questions to figure out what triggers your stress.

Assess your coping strategies. Notice if you have any ways of coping that are self-destructive, as this only contributes to your stress. 

Choose 1-3 activities that are fun to you and are not self-destructive. These activities do not have to be productive or beneficial, but they have to make you feel relaxed and generally feel better

Choose one relaxation technique and one self-care activity. These are up to you, as we tend to neglect self-care relaxation when we’re stressed. 

Optional, but have one person who you can talk to when you’re stressed. When we are stressed, we tend to look at the smaller picture but talking to someone else helps us gain a greater perspective on the matter. 

PRETTIEINPINK’S EXAMPLE PLAN

(If doing something that is my stress trigger, slot a time in the day to do my plan.)

Journal about why I’m stressed 

Make a cup of strawberry and mango tea

Read a nice story while drinking tea

Guided stress meditation

Eat some fruits 

Another thing when creating you plan to not restrict yourself using time. Allow yourself to take as much time as needed to alleviate yourself of stress. 

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE 

Being emotionally intelligent is a skill. It is the ability to understand, process and communicate emotions effectively. 

There are times when we do sometimes let our emotions take over and they dictate our actions, thoughts and words. This is why we need to build this skill, to get that control over our emotions back. 

Thinking before you speak is an oldie but goodie. What we say can drastically influence the current situation for better or for worse. If you think that what you might say is rude, offensive or crude, don’t say it at all. 

Also, stay quiet! I am all for standing up for yourself when being disrespected, but you need to recognise when someone is trying to rile you up... They WANT a reaction out of you. Most likely to use against you. Silently exit the situation instead. 

If you are someone who gets a lot of energy from big emotions like anger, dejection, sadness, and jealousy, try to channel that energy into something that requires you to have a lot of energy and is beneficial to you. Keeping that energy in until you blow up is a no-no.

Not everyone is trying to hold you back with ill intent. People’s previous experiences can influence the advice they give to you because they have your best interest at heart. They know that their method worked, which is why they’re advising it. These types of people don’t understand that there is more than one way, but they still love you.

Avoid prolonging emotions. When you’re sad, don’t listen to depressing music. When you’re angry, don’t consume ragefuel. It’s very easy in this age of consuming to amplify therefore prolonging emotions, but it holds us back. Process it, and move on.

Stop acting on a whim. Go where your heart takes you, but reflect on it and create a plan. When you do, you end up in unfavourable circumstances. The most common one is working so hard to get to a certain point, only to realise that you don’t even like it. This is why reflection is important. 

Be kind even when you’re not receiving it. Kindness is only kind when we do it out of pure love instead of personal gain. Stop expecting people to be kind to you after you’ve been kind to them. Kindness is a debt-free action.

[ynsvnte]

Summer-Fresh — Park Jongseong

Genre: fluff, drabble, est. relationship.

wc: 515

warnings: pet names, kisses, teasing

pairing: bf!jay x fem!reader

Synopsis: this is how you spend your summer vacation with your boyfriend. Very fresh..very relaxing.. also very fun.

Masterlist

The sound squeals as you’re being pushed towards the huge body of water. You try to resist, even begging. Too late. You get soaked as you’re pushed in the ocean. You decided to take a summer vacation with your boyfriend. Jay. Having to want to spend quality time together. Just the two of you. On this nice beach.. you didn’t expect to get in the water. Despite you wearing the proper attire.

“What the hell!” You shout. You frown your brows. Jay's laughter prevents you from being mad at him. You just can’t. You giggle shortly after before splashing water trying to get him wet. “Hey, now!” He sticks his hands out and backs up. You make your way out of the water running towards him, right behind him. “You can just run away!” You yell, chasing him, your boys getting cold as you fasten your pace trying to catch up.

You slowly started getting tired. There’s no way you could keep up. Having completely stopped . You stand there breathing hard. Hands on your knees. You watch him run away further. You take a moment staying there before turning around and walking back to your area.

You didn’t notice somehow. But on your way back you felt a strong pair of arms wrap around your waist fitting perfectly. “And where do you think you're going?” The voice whispers in your ear. Shivers spreading down your back. “I was just going back to our area.. where our stuff are—“ being cut off by a kiss being planted on your cheek before he runs past you.

You shake your head and continue walking. Once you make it back you take a sip of your drink. Replenishing your energy. You can feel his eyes on you, you turn your eyes towards him and make eye contact. He smirks at you, eyes not looking away from yours. You start walking to him and grab the towel nearby. Trying to dry off yourself.

“Need something?” You asked, taking a seat next to him. “No..” he says, eyeing you. You knew he had something to say. You stare ahead, “Your eyes don’t seem to say quite the same..” you hear him laugh at your statement. You swiftly turn your head, glaring.. “What? Can’t I just stare at the love of my life?” Jay says, If he only knew the effect he had on you. Your eyes widened a bit. “What! No” you say, shaking your head, denying. Jay coughs, “how about a date later..?” You could barely hear him. “Repeat what you said..” He mumbled over his words once more. “Babe if you’re going to speak, speak more clearly so I can hear you”

“How about a date later..” much better. “Huh? I can’t hear you” you tease.

“I SAID HOW ABOUT A DATE LATER?!?” He raises his voice loudly enough to make you giggle. “Ok ok I’m sorry..” you say as soon as you open your eyes.

Jay had a slight pout on his face.. not looking at you. You lean in and kiss his cheek. “Of course my love. ”

Author’s note: I RUSHED THIS A BIT thanks to my wifey eires for giving me the member bc I was lost so thank @sincerelyrki 🫡 also I love this theme? IM NOT SURE ABOUT THW WRITING OK ITS 3 am but I ain’t going to bed soo 🤷🏻‍♀️ MORE CASE OH VIDEOS

© ynsvnte copyright 2024

[homeofhousechickens]

I saw this chart being shared around which was either made by an AI/bot or a very misinformed person (notice how it keeps repeating high nutrition value on colors that should def give you the ick) so I'm going to share my egg yolk color post from my patreon.

And here is my 2 year old patreon post if you want to learn what yolk colors really mean/ I think it covers everything besides blood/meat spots which are just due to the oviduct or blood vessels getting damaged in the egg laying process

"Its uncommon but sometimes egg yolks can come in a variety of colors besides shades of yellow and orange. Egg yolks are usually various shades of orange and yellow due to Xanthophylls, specifically Lutein. Xanthophylls are a yellow pigment and a type of carotenoid mostly found in leafy green plants. These pigments are what give free range chickens such a nice rich orange color to their yolks. There is a catch though, us humans know that lutein is what makes egg yolks that nice color so sometimes companies add it into their feed to give the impression that their poultry feed is healthier then their competitors. Sadly this also means that nice orange egg yolks don't necessarily mean the chicken that laid it lived a nice lifestyle. There are other egg yolk colors besides orange and yellow, such as white for example. This only happens when the hen in question is on a diet severely lacking in sources of Lutein, so no corn, leafy greens, grains, ect. So it usually means a chicken is lacking nutritionally and will be fixed immediately when on a better diet. Bright red is another color that can be caused by a variety of reasons. Red yolks can be from a hen eating a lot of sources of lutein and red pigments, such as nice green grass. peppers, or it can be from trauma in the oviduct which led to blood being in the yolk. Sometimes its just nutrition but its always safe to check your eggs over in case this is unusual for your hen. Another interesting color is black and green. These egg yolks are usually caused by cottenseed meal. They are this color due to an overabundance of Gossypol a yellow and brown pigment that is toxic in high amounts to both humans and chickens and very abundant in cottonseeds. Cottenseed meal is sometimes used in some poorer quality feed and silage as filler and as a protein source even though it has anti-nutritional properties. Sadly this can have a negative effect on chickens who eat to much causing long term damage to their digestive health and physically changing their crop. It can also cause eggs to become rubbery in texture and have pinkish egg whites. For these reasons you never want to eat egg yolks of this color. Lastly we have olive green. Olive Green egg yolks are most commonly caused by curious chickens eating acorns or by being fed acorn meal. Not only do acorns cause the bizarre change in color they also cause the eggs to taste weird. Acorns have a high amount of tannins in them, just like tea and just like tea they tend to have a naturally bitter flavor, not something you want to taste in your eggs! Tannins can also be toxic in high amounts so be mindful of your chickens diet if you see them. I think that covers most varieties and the reasons they happen. Its generally a good idea to not eat eggs that are questionable or a weird color in anyway, especially since some dangerous bacteria can change the color of the egg yolk or even the egg whites. So if your eggs arent the usual yellow and to reddish orange shades it may be a good idea to throw out the egg." https://www.patreon.com/posts/64183457

[jinkicake]

Touching, Teasing, Dreaming

Despite his strong physical capabilities, the man crumbles at the slightest show of skin. 

Blade, Gepard, Jing Yuan x Reader

A/N: Little is known about these characters but either way, I want them soooo bad!!!! I might have to play the game for them and the jjba va!!!!!!! im kinda embarrassed w how much i want gepard looooolllll 

SLIGHTLY NSFWWWW // KINDA SMUTTY ((just a pinch))

WC - 1,608

~~~

Blade

“Blade, enough is enough,” The dark-haired man pays you little mind as he glances in your direction from the corner of his eyes. Something in his chest lightens at the puff of your cheeks and frustration etched into your pursed lips. He continues to ignore you and softly grabs your chin between his thumb and pointer finger as he walks past. The touch is gone faster than it was delivered. All he gives you is a subtle nod, a notation that warns you to back off, before making his way further into the hall. Despite the slight curl of his fingers forming a fist, you continue to press the matter. “I wasn’t done talking to you!”

The loose fist quickly becomes tight as the man turns to you with a fierce glare. His eyebrows are furrowed, much like their natural state, but now his attention is on you. He simply does not have the time to waste but, if you’re so insistent on pushing him, Blade is sure he can find some time. 

“What is it?” His low voice calmly asks as he fully turns to face you, finally. 

“Have you not done enough brooding?” You appear to be unwavering in your confidence but, Blade can see right through it. He takes a step forward and you take a step back. The action causes concern to swell in his chest but, he hides it underneath the stony expression on his face. He continues moving until you back into a wall, he walks entirely up to you and ensures that there is nothing but mere centimeters between you two.

“Brooding?” He repeats as turns his head to examine you fully. Blade makes note of the way you refuse to look into his eyes other than the occasional glance before looking down at your shoes. But, that is not what catches his attention. 

The exposed clothing strap resting against your shoulder is what quickly catches his eye. He tries to ignore it but he simply cannot look away from the bare skin. This should not concern him, these feelings and this desire should not be something that affects him. But, it is you. 

Without removing his eyes from your own, Blade pulls your sweater up and over your shoulder to effectively cover both the strap and your exposed skin. 

“I need to get back,” He announces and nearly grunts at the worry in your eyes. “… to brooding.” Despite playing with your own words, toying with your worry, he doesn’t move when you grab the front of his jacket.

Immediately, his clothed thigh shoots between your own as his slim hands plant on either side of your head. The compromising position is getting to him in ways that nothing else can, he is certain you can tell. There’s a question of your lips, a demand that he can not say ‘no’ to when asked. If you request that he stays the night, he cannot find it in himself to deny it. He decides to cut you off first. 

“Don’t ask me of this.” He orders but, the pout on your lips already sends him reeling far enough. There is nothing that could stop the man from gripping your chin once more and roughly kissing you against the wall. No force could pull him away from you now and no force would even dare to try.

Gepard

“Do you like it?” 

The captain is stunned speechless by your appearance. His lips part to answer your question but no words come out, he merely nods as his eyes slightly widen. The momentary silence is broken as he harshly swallows, breaking himself of the trance. 

“You’re beautiful,” Gepard breathes and his eyes are pools that reflect his genuine honesty, the soft blue shines with a commitment to you and only you. “unlike anything I’ve ever seen.” Finally, his hands reach out. His large palms fall to your hips and lightly rest against the thin fabric of your thin lingerie. Again, his mouth runs dry as he continues to stare. 

All the captain can do is stare and stare as hearts begin to take shape in his eyes. 

“So that means you like it?” You egg forward and your voice of reason is the only thing keeping Gepard sane at the moment. He eagerly nods again before timidly licking over his bottom lip. 

“More than anything,” His hands gently squeeze your sides as thick fingertips press against the white fabric adorning your skin. Gepard watches as a sly smile spreads across your face and he immediately leans into your touch when he feels your own dainty fingers ghosting over his bare wrist. Gone is his thick armor and cape, the man before you now is only a handful of clothes away from being as nude as you. 

“Good,” You purse your lips before dragging his heavy hand around to your backside, encouraging the captain to touch you as he pleases. Gepard’s face nearly turns heavily red, a flush takes over his face at the feeling of your soft skin. 

“Daring-”

“Are you nervous?” Your words almost sound taunting and Gepard can see the amusement now in your eyes. If he looked a little further, he would also see his own timid expression in your lustful pools. The captain begins to shake his head but is yanked forward as you tightly grip the collar of his dress shirt. “Take, Gepard. Everything is yours to take.” 

He’s so tempted to give in to you, to do exactly as you desire and hold you down until your legs give out but, he prides himself in being a gentleman. He values his own restraint and cherishes you much further beyond a messy fuck. 

“Allow me to take my time with you,” His voice is soft, gentle almost as he softly tugs on the backs of your thighs to pull you into his lap. You follow without complaint, almost turning into a liquid in his hands. “you deserve to be treasured.” The thoughtful words cause you to fist his dark shirt and sinfully arch your back, pressing your chest into his own. 

Then, finally, the captain places his lips beneath your ear. He kisses the spot delicately before lowering his face to repeat the action in another spot. Each peck grows heavier than the last and by the time he makes it to the valley of your breasts, you’re happily grinding in his lap. 

“Patience is a virtue, my dear,” He preaches, his hands now cupping your breasts before squeezing over the soft mounds with pure dedication. “it’s time you learn a thing or two.”

Jing Yuan 

“Don’t you think it’s time to rest?” Your voice gently pulls Jing Yuan away from his meditation, dull eyes opening upon your command. The older general brings his heavy stare over to your silhouette in the doorway. It takes a few blinks for his eyes to get adjusted to the light but, he immediately notices the flimsy robe covering your body. The material does not do its job in the slightest and it takes everything within the man not to show his upcoming arousal on his face. 

“If this is what greets me then I suppose it is,” He takes his time getting up from the floor but, rises with grace nonetheless. Slowly, the general makes his way over to you and does not hesitate to reach out when you’re close enough. “hello, my love.” His hand softly cups your cheek and quickly washes your entire body in warmth just at his touch. “I didn’t realize it was so late,”

“I know,” You quickly answer back and the slight nip in the delivery of your words makes the old man smile. His lips quirk upwards in amusement as you pull away and head for your bedroom. You know he is going to follow, your unwavering confidence causes desire to further pool in his gut. 

What would he do without his delight?

Upon stepping into your room, Jing Yuan is greeted by the sight of your robe falling to the floor. He sucks in a harsh breath at the pretty lingerie lining your skin and once again, grabs you with firm hands. This time, you’re sure it’ll be harder to break away from him. When Jing Yuan pulls you into his chest and buries his face into the crook of your neck, you know you won’t be let go until his desires are settled. 

His hair tickles the sides of your face, lightly brushing against your cheeks as his front subtly rolls into your backside. The feeling makes you laugh but, it’s quickly cut short by an airy moan. 

“You’re eager,” You hum before lifting your hand up to his thick hair, the white strands soon find themselves woven between your fingertips. “weren’t you meditating a few minutes ago?”

“All I thought of was you,” He murmurs against your jaw, a heavy hand now cupping your throat. The general tilts your head, angling your face toward him before selfishly taking a kiss to satisfy his own desires. His actions quite literally steal your breath away. There’s a skillful method to his kisses, pushing and molding your lips into his own before his tongue peaks out. The hot muscle quickly snakes its way into your mouth and licks behind your teeth.

Jing Yuan tightens his grip against your waist as you falter in standing still, he holds you on your feet against his strong body when you begin to feel the effects of his strong-willed desire. 

Old man or not, the general gives you a taste of euphoric freedom that no one else ever could. 

[yourstrulyrika]

Leon’s tits appreciation fic ♡

no warnings as usual, just fem!reader. it’s really just Leon’s chest appreciation because damn.

also. a small rant at the bottom of the fic? just a disclaimer btw. it’s nothing triggering me thinks, it’s about Leon so that’s why i’m putting it here i still encourage you to read it.

also this one might be a bit messy i just started taking my new meds and my body is going crazy. i’m really sleepy & dizzy all the time so yeah. sorry if it’s a bit out of my usual style or something ♡

you love Leon’s chest. that much is obvious — because he loves yours too obviously. you two love each other, body, soul, heart and mind. this includes your and his chests. Leon loves sleeping on your chest, and you love sleeping on Leon’s chest, too. it’s common for you two.

but, you definitely love playing with Leon’s chest the most. it’s just so plush, feels so good to touch. Leon’s chest is his soft spot, to say the least. when you touched his chest for the first time, he arched his back so prettily, leaning his head back. his nipples harden under your touch, his body getting warmer and eager for more as his cock grows harder.

“Dear god,”

he sighs out when you touch his chest, and it only makes you grin in return. you rarely get him to such state. sure, he lets out a grunt or two, but this? and he actually blushes. just a tiiny bit, but it’s still a blush! so you decide to take it further, planting little kisses all over his chest, feeling his heart subtly flutter under your lips. Leon is only this vulnerable around you, no one ever sees this side of him — he feels safe around you. safe enough to let himself be the submissive one for once.

Leon is unable to take it anymore. he tugs at your pants, sliding them down along with your panties to expose your pretty pussy to his eager gaze. your cunt is glistening wet, making Leon drool at the sight. he places a subtle slap on your pussy, before repeating it, making you twitch your hips. his cock is hitting against your thigh, wanting to be buried in your warm insides.

“Getting this worked up over playing with my cheee—ngghmh!!” he lets out the hottest whimper one can think of. as he speaks, you decide to shush him, rather effectively. you wrap your lips around his nipple, gently tucking on it while flicking the other one. Leon is actually losing his mind, he’s leaking precum already.

“Fuck, baby, please just let me slide inside you,” he grunts out, guiding his cock to tap against your clit, begging for entry. he’s giving you the puppy eyes, the ones you can’t say no to. besides, with the way the tip of his cock is leaking so much just gets you so eager. once given the permission he almost jumps on you, but you keep him down by biting on his nipple, getting another, louder moan.

“Tease,” he pants out, breathing hitching and getting heavy. he closes his eyes, lips parting slightly, chest heaving up and down. you decide to do something— you push two fingers into his mouth, and he immediately laps at them, sucking them like it’s your pussy that he’s so starved off. he finally guides his cock into your insides, his length already twitching and throbbing as it sloppily moves in and out. he’s mumbling something incoherent to himself, babbling about it feeling so good. this, mixed with you constantly sucking his nipples, kneading his chest while also pushing your fingers into his mouth? it’s heaven. he’s in heaven.

it doesn’t take long for him to cum. in fact, just a few more minutes of you playing with his pretty nipples mixed with your cunt gripping him so well just drives him nuts, cumming inside you after a while. he obviously makes sure to make you cum too— before pushing you beneath him, now cupping your breasts

“My turn, huh? Your chest needs some loving, too.” he says this so confidently, already kneading at your chest.

rant time! sorry guys, today’s one is shorter bc i dont feel so well :( but anyway, here’s my little rant about tiktok and honestly most of the fandom.

i hate the fact that people oversexualize Leon so much. this, and also not understand his character — caring only about his looks. people hate vendetta leon but i literally love this man. he’s fucking beautiful. all the resident evil characters are so misunderstood, oversexualized and ignored. i just hate it, and yeah i know i know — it’s just fiction, sure, but i just don’t like it. i wish more people took Leon seriously because this man is literally so much of a sweetheart, meanwhile people just sexualize him 24/7 :( he’s so much more than his looks. he’s literally so sweet it hurts.

rant over, just wanted to get it off of my chest. i just love him so much and people reduce him to various sex related things. smut and all that is good obviously, i just dislike when people constantly make Leon a completely different character than he actually is. i love both smut and sfw things, but man. tiktok is so full of people misunderstanding Leon, it’s annoying. they reduce him to completely different man — and let’s not even talk about the 18+ audios that they’re posting…. i just.. idk.

anyway. love you all! thank you for reading <3

[infamous-light]

You Belong to Me Ch. 4

Alcina Dimitrescu x F! Reader

Ch. 1 Ch. 2 Ch. 3

AO3: You Belong to Me

Summary: Lady Dimitrescu's obsession knows no bounds as she becomes increasingly possessive over you. Will you succumb to her dark embrace, or find a way to break free before it's too late?

Word Count: 2.3K

Warnings: Yandere, possessive/obsessive behavior, drugged

The air was thick with tension as you found yourself seated in the same chair positioned before Lady Dimitrescu's desk. Her figure loomed beside you, towering and imposing, her eyes blazing with barely restrained fury. The weight of her displeasure made your heart pound erratically inside of your chest.

“I've been told you were wandering the halls instead of having lunch as I instructed.” Lady Dimitrescu said, her voice low and dangerous.

You shifted uncomfortably under her gaze, trying to muster the courage to speak. “I-I was just talking to the staff. I didn't think it would be a problem.”

Her eyes flashed with anger, and she took a deliberate step closer, the sharp click of her heels echoing against the wooden floor. She stopped just in front of you, planting her hands firmly on her hips, adding an intimidating edge to her stance. Instinctively, you pressed yourself against the back of the chair, desperate to put some distance between you and her as much as possible.

“You didn't think it would be a problem?” Lady Dimitrescu repeated, her tone unsettlingly calm. “Bela informed me that you were meddling in areas that you had no business being in, ignoring my explicit instruction.”

As her words sank in, your palms grew clammy with sweat. You didn't understand why she was so adamant about forbidding you from speaking to the staff.

“But why can't I talk to them?” You questioned. “I was only trying to-”

“It was a decision I made,” Lady Dimitrescu interrupted, her voice slicing through the air like a blade, sharp and unyielding. “My daughters simply carried out my orders and I expect you to obey without question.”

To your surprise, a surge of anger flared within you. You weren’t being given a proper answer.

Her reprimand felt like an unjustified attack, each word stinging like a lash against your skin. The venom in her voice caused a small knot to tighten in your stomach, and you found yourself clenching and unclenching your fists in a desperate attempt to release some of the mounting tension that stiffened your muscles. Yet, despite your efforts, the frustration within you continued to grow, threatening to boil over at any moment. Consequences be damned. The only thing that mattered now was standing your ground, even if it meant facing the repercussions later.

“I didn't do anything wrong,” you finally managed to grit out through clenched teeth, fixing her with a steely glare. “I don't understand why you won't-”

“Because you are mine!” Lady Dimitrescu snapped.

Her hands came crashing down on the arms of the chair, effectively boxing you in with such force that the wood creaked under the pressure. The sudden invasion of your personal space made you instinctively flinch back.

“You are my pet!” She declared, her grip tightening on the chair's arms, her nails digging into the polished wood. “You belong to me and no one else can have you! Is that clear!?”

At that moment, you were paralyzed by shock, rendered speechless as the gravity of her words took hold. Lady Dimitrescu’s claim over you was beyond possessive; it was deranged. Her gaze pierced into yours, unrelenting and fierce, and in her eyes, you saw a madness that threatened to consume you entirely. Then, a chilling smile spread across Lady Dimitrescu's lips, clearly amused by the look of disbelief on your face. With a calculated slowness, she leaned in, closing the distance between you two until her mouth hovered a mere inch from yours, her breath lukewarm against your lips.

“You belong to me now,” she purred, her words dripping with sinister satisfaction. “Every breath you take, every beat of your heart, is mine to command.”

With a gentle yet unnerving touch, she extended her right hand, running the back of her fingers down the side of your face. The delicate caress left a trail of dread in its wake.

“You are mine, now and forever,” her voice softened, almost tender, but the menace in her tone was still unmistakable. “And don't even think of escaping either, for I will find you. Always.”

You could only stare up at her in horror.

Lady Dimitrescu's gaze hardened once more, her expression shifting from predatory satisfaction to stern authority.

“Now, regarding your insolence,” she began, her words sharp but controlled. “I will grant some leniency this time. You were not previously made aware of the rule prohibiting interaction with anyone besides myself and my daughters until now,” she paused, allowing her words to hang in the air. “However, this will be your only warning. Disobey me again and the consequences will be far less forgiving. Do I make myself clear?”

The threat lingered in the air, thick and suffocating, like a dense fog enveloping the room.

“Yes, my Lady.” You responded, low and deferential, feeling defeated.

There was a long, tense silence. You could feel her eyes boring into you, evaluating, considering.

Finally, she spoke. “Good. Remember your place.”

Your teeth ground together, the muscles in your jaw tightening with suppressed anger. You forced yourself to breathe slowly, even as your thoughts raged against her.

***

For the rest of the afternoon, you remained quiet. Lady Dimitrescu didn’t say much either.

Every now and then, her eyes would flicker toward you, a cold, calculating look that made the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end. To distract yourself, you studied the intricate patterns on the walls, but the oppressive atmosphere made it nearly impossible to concentrate on anything other than the formidable presence of the Lady.

The clock on the wall ticked away the minutes, each second stretching into what felt like an eternity. You dared not to speak, sensing that any interruption would be met with a fierce glare and harsh words. Instead, you observed her with cautious glances, noting the way her long, gloved fingers moved the fountain pen gracefully, yet purposefully, over the documents. Occasionally, she would let out a soft, almost inaudible sigh, her brow furrowing in thought.

As the afternoon light began to wane, casting long shadows across the room, Lady Dimitrescu set down the pen she had been using and leaned back in her chair. Her eyes narrowed as she stared down at you.

“I grow weary of sifting through these endless papers,” she sighed, her fatigue evident. “I’d say it’s time we had dinner.”

At the mention of food, your stomach couldn't help but betray you with a low, rumbling growl.

Lady Dimitrescu's lips quirked upward into an amused smile. “Hungry, are we?”

Your face flushed in embarrassment as you reluctantly admitted, “Yes, my Lady.”

“Now, we can’t have that,” she continued, her tone dripping with faux concern. “It would reflect poorly on me if I allowed my pet to starve.”

The word pet cuts through you like a knife, stirring a deep-seated loathing.

Lady Dimitrescu’s eyes twinkled in amusement. It was as if she could read your thoughts. “Let’s not waste any more time. Come.”

***

Lady Dimitrescu strode ahead with an air of effortless grace.

Her heels clicked softly against the carpet, each step measured and purposeful. You found yourself struggling to match her brisk pace, your shorter strides turning your attempt to keep up into a near jog. She glanced back at you, her eyes gleaming with that familiar, infuriating amusement.

“Keep up, pet.” She purred, the endearment laced with mockery.

You bit back a retort, knowing it would only amuse her further and perhaps invite more of her playful cruelty. A smile tugged at the corners of her lips as she turned away, continuing to lead you further down the dimly lit hallway.

Finally, you reached the entrance of the dining room.

The moment you stepped inside, the Lady's daughters all turned their gazes toward you. They exchanged knowing glances with each other, their lips curling into slight, conspiratorial smiles. The sight made your skin prickle, an unsettling sensation creeping over you. Lady Dimitrescu swept past you, taking her place at the head of the table. She cast a glance in your direction, a faint smile playing on her lips, her eyes glinting with an unreadable expression.

You couldn't understand why everyone was behaving so oddly. It was as if everyone but you were in on some elaborate joke. Despite the strangeness, you took your place at the table, the empty seat between Bela and Daniela waiting for you like a reserved spot. The table was already set with a lavish spread of delicacies that seemed almost too extravagant to consume. Silver platters overflowed with an assortment of roasted meats, vibrant fruits, and freshly baked pastries still warm from the oven. The sight of such a feast started to make your mouth water.

Daniela giggled and inched closer into your space, her breath lukewarm against your cheek. “Looks like someone is hungry.”

Heat rose up your neck and you leaned back, putting a bit of space between yourself and Daniela. In your sudden movement, your left shoulder grazed against Bela's own, drawing her attention. She turned to you, her eyebrow arched in amusement, a small smirk appearing on her lips. You averted your gaze quickly, heat spreading across your face even more.

Lady Dimitrescu observed the scene with a wide smile, then addressed everyone at the dining table, declaring, “You may eat.”

You picked up your fork and knife, cutting into the succulent roast in front of you. Each bite was a burst of flavor, the tender meat practically melting in your mouth. You reached for your glass next, your fingertips brushing against the smooth surface of the cool crystal. Unlike the dark red liquid swirling in their glasses, yours held only clear, pure water. As you raised the glass to your lips, you paused, noticing the way everyone was staring at you. Four sets of golden eyes, radiant and unblinking, seemed to scrutinize your every move.

You frowned, a hint of unease threading into your thoughts as you wondered why they were all watching you. Swallowing thickly, you took a sip. The water was cool and refreshing, soothing your parched throat, yet there was an odd undertone to its taste, a faint hint of something unfamiliar. It wasn't unpleasant, but it was enough to make you stop drinking. You set the glass back down, the soft clink sounding louder than it should in the heavy silence.

Lady Dimitrescu watched you intently over the rim of her wine glass, taking a slow, deliberate sip.

For a moment, you felt fine, but suddenly, a cold sweat began to bead across your forehead. You tried to focus, to clear your head, but a sudden wave of dizziness hit you. The room began to spin slightly, and you had to grip the edge of the table to steady yourself. Your vision blurred momentarily, forcing you to blink rapidly to clear it. Through the haze, you could see her smile widening ever so slightly.

“Is something the matter, dear?” Lady Dimitrescu asked mockingly, her sweet tone clashing with the sadistic gleam in her eyes.

You took a deep breath, desperately trying to calm yourself, but it was no use. The dizziness worsened, making it difficult to focus on anything. Their figures began to transform into indistinct, hazy silhouettes, their features lost in the dim light. You attempted to speak, to ask what was happening, but your voice came out weak and slurred.

“W-What-” You managed to croak out, your throat tight and painfully dry.

Panic surged through you, and you shot out of your seat, the force knocking over your chair with a loud clatter. The sound echoed through the room, yet no one moved to help you. Your heart pounded fiercely in your chest, each beat sending a fresh wave of nausea through you.

“What-” you stammered, grappling with the words before you finally managed to force them out. “What the hell did you do to me!?” You demanded, your voice cracking with fear and anger.

She leisurely raised her glass of wine, taking another sip with an air of detached amusement. After swallowing, she turned her attention back, her eyes glinting with a cold, mocking light.

“Calm down, pet. You'll only tire yourself out.” Lady Dimitrescu drawled, her tone dripping with condescension.

Her daughters snickered, their cruel laughter ringing in your ears. You stumbled back from the table, attempting to get far away from them. However, your vision almost went black, and your legs buckled beneath you, sending you crashing to the floor.

A pair of arms suddenly wrapped around your waist, firm yet surprisingly gentle, preventing you from falling to the floor. With a controlled, almost tender motion, you were slowly lowered until you lay on the ground.

“Oh my.” An airy voice giggled. Daniela had caught you, her features alight with mirth as she beamed down at you.

“G-Get off me.” You mumbled, your words barely coherent as you weakly attempted to push her away from you. Daniela's grip tightened, her laughter tinkling like a delicate bell.

You heard the others chuckle as they closed in around you, forming a tight circle of predatory grins and glittering eyes. Their amusement only grew with each whimper and groan of frustration that left your lips.

Cassandra knelt beside you; her gaze fixed on your face with an over-exaggerated pout. “Oh, don't be like that.” She cooed. Her hand reached out, gently brushing the sweat-drenched hair away from your forehead. You hated her touch, but you were too weak to bat her hand away as your limbs were heavy and unresponsive.

As you looked up at Lady Dimitrescu, a mixture of fear and confusion clouded your eyes, your helplessness evident. She maintained her serene smile as she gazed down at you.

“Take her upstairs, Bela.” Lady Dimitrescu instructed softly, turning toward her eldest daughter.

“Yes, mother.” She responded.

Bela stepped forward and knelt beside you. The world around you blurred violently as she hoisted you up, the dim light of the room fading into obscurity. With the last of your strength ebbing away, your vision darkened around the edges and the overwhelming exhaustion dragged you into unconsciousness.

[luvhughes43]

on the dance floor | luca fantilli

[luvhughes43 masterlist🌷]

request: I want to send a request for Luca. So Luca and reader are dating and maybe it’s Summer and they go to a friend or like a family members wedding and she gets drunk and he’s just admiring her with one of his friends until she drags him on the dance floor, just something cute and giggly!

word count: 0.6k 

“do you like?” you ask your boyfriend of a few years as you twirl around in your dress. luca plants his hands firmly on your waist - effectively stopping your twirling - to kiss you before mumbling a soft, “you’re gorgeous,”

“i don’t think i heard you?” you giggle from the pressure of lucas soft lips darting across your cheek and down to your neck. 

“you’re gorgeous,” he repeats, knowing full well that you heard him the first time. luca places one last kiss on your lips before stepping away from you to straighten himself out. your cousins wedding ceremony was late this afternoon, so now you and luca were just waiting around the venue until the real festivities began. 

you watch silently as luca straightens his tie, which will definitely be discarded by the time you two hit the dance floor. you couldn’t help but be mesmerized by his small movements, like the way his fingers comb through his grown out hair, now weaving through the laces of his shoes, the way he rolls the sleeves of his blouse up his arms… 

“we should head down now,” luca says, straightening up and reaching for your hand. you quickly intertwin your fingers, and let luca lead you outside where the party is. you vow silently to yourself that you were going to have a great night. 

tequila shot, 

vodka cran

stolen sips of a ceasar

another tequila shot…

“luca!” you cheer, wandering up to your boyfriend who was busy talking to some of your brothers. it had only been about 30 minutes since you left to do some shots with your cousins, but you still miss luca regardless. 

“y/n!” he replies easily as a smile breaks out across his face. he swore he’d never seen anyone more beautiful. 

once you were in reach of luca and your brothers, you stumble on air. “how many shots did you take?” one of your brothers tauts as luca steadys you. 

“only not very many,” you slur, gaze now focusing solely on your boyfriend. “luca!” you repeat, all giggles as you lean your head against his shoulder. 

“hey baby,” he replies, arms wrapping securely around your waist to prevent any more stumbles and falls. “are you having fun?”

you hum in response, meaning to say something more but when you look up at luca your train of thought disappears. “you’re so pretty,” 

“you're so pretty too,” luca giggles and brushes your hair out of your face. “i was actually just telling your brothers how pretty you were,” 

your face burns and when you turn towards your brothers for confirmation they reluctantly nod. “its gross how much he likes you,” 

“that’s so mean! luca is so sweet and-”

“It’s a murder on the dance floor… but you better not kill the groove!” 

you gasp mid sentence, completely forgetting about whatever petty argument you were going to start for fun. “luca,” you pull away from him while he's distractedly looking at you. 

“DJ, gonna burn this - house down!” you attempt to sing the lyrics in your hazy mind. “luca let’s dance,” you shout enthusiastically, and luca lets you pull him onto the dance floor with all the other young wedding-goers. 

“it's a murder on the dance floor!” luca sings, spinning you around quickly as you both move messily with the music. 

“you better not steal the moves!” you shout sing back, arms high above your head as you continue swaying to the music. 

“DJ!” luca yells, pointing to who knows! you spin once more, and then lace yours and lucas fingers together. 

you two continue dancing, stealing quick kisses in-between songs, and taking half-shots as two young people in love do at weddings!

[mytheoristavenue]

Tokoyami simps yall come get yall's lunch!!

Villian!Tokoyami x Villian!Reader who is infertile but still gets baby fever so he brings home orphaned children for you to car for. He knows your quirk pours too much love in your heart than even he can claim so he gives you something else to share it with.

You long to one day have a normal life with him where you care for your children and keep the house while he, your husband, works. But you know it isn't possible until he changes the world order to favor creatures of the night like yourselves. He promises that one day, this dingy old warehouse will be a proper home for you and his children.

Until then, he's perfectly happy to keep you content by robbing chain baby supply stores and bringing home anything and everything he can find to make your nest feel more full. 🖤

"'Yomi..." You whine, laying your head on his chest.

"Yes, my sweet?" He replies, looking over blueprints of an downtown orphanage in an impoverished neighborhood, rumored to treat heteromorphs especially cruelly.

"Can we cuddle? My love is overflowing and I need to share it with you..." you pout, ignoring his open arm, dropping to the floor and resting your head on his knee, nuzzling into his touch as he pets your hair. "Am I bothering you, raven?"

"Never, my pet." He answers, still neglecting to look at you. "I'm working on a suprise for you."

You perk up at the prospect of a gift. "A suprise? What is it?" You mutter the last bit "An engagement ring would be nice..."

He chuckles at your guess. "Not this time, lover. I know you get lonely sitting here all by yourself when I'm gone...how would you like it if I gave you something else to love in my place?"

Your heart sinks and you cling to his shirt. "Is my love suffocating you, darling?" You asked, worried.

"Never," he repeats, pulling you up into his lap. "I just mean..." He gestures to his plans. "Maybe you'd like someone to take care of..."

"A baby?!" You shriek happily. "You're going to give me a child?!

"I intend to," he confirmed, his hand slipping over your tummy. "And if I can't put one inside here," he takes his hand from you, planting it on the pile of pages. "I'll find you one here."

You squealed happily, standing up and dancing in place. "I-I'm gonna be a mother!"

"And a wonderful one at that, my dove." He praised, pulling you back into his lap, presenting you with a file. "Now, choose which one you want and I'll do my best. You have to help me make this place a safe home for a child first, though, alright?"

"Yes, of course!" You beam, skin beginning to glow as your heart swelled and you threw your arms around him, your love energizing him. "Thank you, nightingale!"

"Anything for my lark. I'd move heaven and earth to give you what you want. I know what you truly want is to bare my child but I hope this will keep you content until I find away around your quirks side effects."

"More than happy..." You sniffle. "I'm overjoyed, Fumikage..."

His eyes soften as you utter his given name, not his alias, not his family name, not a pet name. His first name. It was something you only reserved for special moments like these.

"I'll make an honest woman of you one day, I swear," He promised, nuzzling your cheek with his beak. "But until then, we will have a family, you have my word."

After sitting for a moment, letting you let out your happy tears he spoke again. "But don't think for a moment we're going to stop practicing for when I find a cure to your infertility..." he smirked. "We'll try everything in the book until your body accepts my seed... no matter how taboo it may be."

[universalitgirlsblog2]

🍨🍒QUOTES FROM THE POWER OF SUBCONSCIOUS MIND🍨🍒

🍨All you have to do is unite mentally and emotionally with the good you wish to embody . The creative powers of your subconscious will respond accordingly. Begin now, today. Let wonders happen in your life ! Keep on keeping on until the day breaks and the shadows flee away.

🍒The law of your mind is the law of belief . This means to believe in the way your mind works , to believe in belief itself. The belief of your mind is the thought of your mind , just that and nothing else. All your experiences , events , conditions and acts are produced by your subconscious mind in reaction to your thoughts. Remember, it is not the thing believed in , but the belief in your own mind that brings about the result.

🍨Every thought is a cause and every condition is the effect.

🍒You are like a captain navigating ship. He or she must give the right orders , or the ship is wrecked . In the same way , you must give the right orders ( thoughts and images ) to your subconscious mind , which controls and governs all your experiences.

🍨Change your thoughts and you change your destiny.

🍒Your subconscious mind is the seat of your emotions. It is the creative mind . If you think good , good will follow. If you think evil , evil will follow. This is the way your mind works.

🍨You must be very careful to give your subconscious only those suggestions that heal , bless , elevate and inspire you in all your ways . Remember your subconscious doesn't understand a joke. It takes you at your word.

🍒Whatever your conscious mind assumes and believes to be true , your subconscious mind will accept and bring to pass . Believe in good fortune , divine guidance , right action , and all the blessings of life.

🍨All frustrations is due to unfulfilled desires. If you dwell on obstacles , delays and difficulties , your subconscious mind responds accordingly, and you are blocking your own good.

🍒Keep your conscious mind busy with the expectation of the best , and your subconscious will faithfully reproduce your habitual thinking.

🍨Know that faith is like a seed planted in the ground ; it grows after it's kind . Plant the idea ( seed ) in your mind , water and fertilize it with expectancy , and it will become manifest.

🍒There is only one process of healing and that is faith . There is only one healing power , namely , your subconscious mind.

🍨Whether the object of your faith is real or false , you will get results . Your subconscious mind responds to the thought in your mind . Look upon faith as a thought in your mind , and that will suffice.

🍒It is foolish to believe in sickness or in anything that will hurt or harm you. Believe in perfect health , prosperity, peace , wealth and divine guidance.

🍨Great and noble thoughts upon which you habitually dwell become great acts.

🍒Know that you can remake yourself by giving a new blueprint to your subconscious mind.

🍨Thoughts of jealousy , fear , worry , anxiety tear down and destroy your nerves and glands , bringing about mental and physical diseases of all kinds.

🍒What you affirm consciously and feel as true will be made manifest in your mind , body and affairs . Affirm the good and enter the joy of living.

🍨When your mind is relaxed and you accept an idea , your subconscious goes to work to execute the idea.

🍒Imagination is your most powerful faculty. Imagine what is lovely and of good report. You are what you imagine yourself to be.

🍨What you consciously affirm, you must not mentally deny a few moments later. This will neutralize the good you have affirmed.

🍒When fear knocks at the door of your mind , let faith in God and all things good open the door.

🍨The idea of success contains all the elements of success. Repeat the word " success " to yourself frequently with faith and conviction and you will be under a subconscious compulsion to succeed.

[anonimusunnoaniswriting]

𝑮𝒐𝒐𝒅 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈, 𝑴𝒚 𝑳𝒂𝒅𝒚 | 𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝟑

(𝑺𝒆𝒃𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒂𝒏 𝑴𝒊𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒔 𝒙 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓)

⚠️MDNI. 18+ ADULTS ONLY⚠️

🎀Age in bio or blocked🎀

Rating: Mature

Category: F/M

Fandom: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler

Relationship: Sebastian Michaelis/CielsCousin!Reader

Characters: Sebastian Michaelis; Reader

Summary: smut smut some more smut just smut scenes. all the smut.

Additional Tags: Fluff and Smut; Sex; Vaginal Sex; Eventual Smut; Neck Kissing; Kissing; Gentle Kissing; Surprise Kissing; Making Out; Implied Sexual Content; Phantomhive manor; Reader-Insert; Victorian

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 3: 𝕿𝖍𝖆𝖙 𝕭𝖚𝖙𝖑𝖊𝖗; 𝕬𝖙 𝕸𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙

“Sebastian!” you moan and he pumps his fingers in and out of you. His long digits feel their way inside you, rubbing against your squelching, gummy walls. You can’t help but gasp, feeling them curl inside you. 

His mouth is against the skin on the nape of your neck and you feel him smirk. His hand plays with your breast, pulling and teasing your already hard nipple. You’ve never even heard of these things being done to a woman. Lewd, degrading, but at the same time, it feels so good! 

When you had heard the older ladies gossip about these night-time, bedroom, activities, they always spoke of how it was such a chore, and how men would just do what they had to, leaving them feeling unsatisfied to the point of irritation. Sebastian was the antithesis of these stories. He gave pleasure instead of only seeking it himself. Constantly making sure he helped you feel good. 

“If demons are like this, then perhaps being tempted is not truly such a bad thing as the church states…” you thought to yourself, feeling yourself melt under his fingertips.

He releases his clamp on your skin with a loud ‘pop’, and he looks at you and smiles. “You’re being so patient and good for me, my lady.” There's a flash of white fangs and his voice is low in your ear, punctuated by the repeated wet sounds from your pussy. 

A shiver runs down your spine that has nothing to do with the fact that he is still playing with you down below. “Keep being so good for me, darling, and you will be rewarded,” he says and plants a kiss on your forehead. You nod. He lowers his head and pulls one of your nipples into his mouth. Your skin is like burning ice, and the heat of his devilish mouth burns like the flames of hell. Your body writhes. You move to his rhythm, following his unspoken orders. A pressure builds up, starting low in your abdomen and Sebastian hears his name whispered in near reverence as you clutch at the bed sheets. You can feel yourself reaching the precipice of this pleasure. The dam is about to break; the water will spill in a matter of moments; and suddenly Sebastian is gone. His fingers aren’t in you anymore.

You cry out in surprise and dismay. The lack of Sebastian’s touch makes you feel so empty. He chuckles. His lips come down on yours again. “Now now, I can’t let you finish up so early can I?” he tells you gently brushing his lips against yours. 

 He unbuttons his trousers and removes them with his underclothes and the rest of his clothes. His cock stands already hard and dripping precum. Leaning over you he kisses you between your breasts, then your stomach,  your navel travelling all the way down to your clit. He peppers kisses all over you while his cock hovers just outside your entrance, lightly brushing against it. You shiver in anticipation and stroke his hair.

“Sebastian,” you whine, “Please!” He chuckles again, darker this time. You close your eyes as you feel him enter you. You’ve had him before but only once. His size is still novel, you feel the painful stretch. Your hands find refuge in his hair as he continues to push in. 

Though he is gentle, you can't help but feel a few tears escape. Sebastian dips and licks them off your skin, savouring the salt. You are divine. Exquisite. He pins you down by the waist, effectively making sure he is the one to control the speed and force of his introduction. Your fingers are entangled in his hair; he growls when you pull at it, and bites down your collarbone. There is sure to be a mark there tomorrow morning but you don’t think about that, because Sebastian has now entered you to the hilt.

He stills, allowing you to adjust to his girth, “Is this okay?” You nod, raising your hips to encourage movement from his side. Understanding you, Sebastian now lowers his head down to kiss you softly before starting to move. There is a slight pain but a quick-blooming feeling of pleasure. Whatever he had built with his fingers had not disappeared completely, waking up again with a few thrusts. He moves his lips to your neck and you arch your back, feeling sharp teeth against your skin. He picks up the pace. Sebastian never fails to pay attention to details. His hands are all over you. Touching you, feeling you – as if he can’t get enough. He leaves a trail of fast-cooling wet kisses over your body. 

“Is this good for you?” he groans in your ear. 

“Yes! More, please!” You moan out breathily. You have been waiting for this for so long. 

His thrusts get harder, cock bullying your cunt. You cannot fathom what makes this man so attractive. He has you under his spell, as if knowing you for the longest time. A scholar, studying you intimately. With every touch, your body responds to him. Back arching, head thrown back. And then there was that knot inside you. The pressure that just keeps building each second. 

You drag your nails down his back, hearing him growl darkly against your jaw where he had been marking you with little bites; his tongue licking away at your pliant skin. He kisses down to your earlobe, taking the soft skin into his mouth, sucking on it. You feel yourslef  getting close; your climax is imminent. You cry out the demon's name, desperation clinging to each syllable. In response, he rides into you faster, his cock hits your inside walls hard. You let out a scream and immediately his hand is on your mouth silencing you.

“My lady,” he says softly, “As much as I want to hear you sing for me, this is not an opportune time for it. Someone might hear....” He chuckles as if it is a funny joke, but you cannot spare the time to think about that. Every move overwhelms you. And here you are at the edge, and the man above doesn’t seem any different from his usual calm, put-together self.

“Sebastian…” you let out an animalistic groan, raking your fingernails down his back. You feel him shudder and then without warning he puts his hand down to where he had entered you. You felt him touch something, and then – an explosion of fireworks. Everything is a blur. Your eyes shut and you see the strange wriggly worms swimming across the darkness behind your lids. Your hips reach out to his body of their own will; you ride out your orgasm on his cock, bucking and keening.  You have to have died. No, it can’t be real. What you feel is nothing like you have ever known. 

As you come down from your high, Sebastian withdraws from inside you gently. “Wait, Sebastian. You haven’t reached your climax yet!” you protest. You may have been new to the art, but you had overheard things– enough to know this.

“I don’t wish to wear you out my lady.” Sebastian says, wiping the sweat from your brow. You look at the man. His hair is a mess suffering – in your vice like grip. His back is marked with the thin red lines your nails had bestown. But otherwise he looks impeccable. And there you were, ruffles and bundles. A sheen of sweat on your body and a sticky wetness between your legs. 

You shake your head, “Please Sebastian. Tell me what to do, teach me how to make you feel as good as you have made me feel. I want you to reach the finish as well…”

Sebastian smiles. Getting off the bed he says, “All in good time my lady. But for tonight, you have had enough. I do not wish to overwhelm you, and end up hurting you. I will take care of it myself.” He reassures, flashing you his signature smile. 

It surprises you how bold you have gotten around him but you pat the down beside you, earning you a puzzled look from the man. “I insist, my lady, I ca—”

“Yes, you can. However, I’d like to watch while you do… Please, if you don’t mind. And I would very much like it, if you held me for the night after you did.”

“Very well, my lady.” Sebastian says, his smile widening. He lies down beside you, positioning himself so you can watch, and runs his hand over himself. You stared, transfixed on the elegant movements; questioning how an act that is considered so vile by the people of society could be made to look so beautiful in reality. The long fingers and the contrasting dark nails on his length are mesmerising, and your jaw drops as you stare. 

You move towards Sebastian, and getting on your knees you put in your own hand, not fully realising what you are doing till you hear Sebastian’s voice saying, “My lady?” You shake your head and mimic his movements, stroking the warm shaft. His breathing turns short and quick much like yours had been just a little while before. “Faster, please” you hear Sebastian say, and you comply. “More, squeeze it, gently.”

Your small hands follow his every order. You can feel him getting harder than ever as he gets closer to his own climax. He stutters and white sticky liquid squirts out from his cock spilling over your fingers. You stop, staring at it wide-eyed. 

“Would you like to taste it, my lady? I’d like you to.” You looked at Sebastian. His eyes are heavy-lidded, and glowing red in the darkness. You face him, a stray strip of moonlight slicing across your naked body, the only source of illumination in the room. You stick out your tongue and run it over the liquid on your hand. To say it tasted good would have been a lie, but something about the act was so erotic that you couldn’t stop. 

A shudder under you and you know Sebastian liked it too, so you continue; putting a finger into your mouth and sucking, licking. Sebastian grabs your hair, and pulls you down onto him kissing you. “You are so beautiful.” He says, sucking on your bottom lip. “So absolutely gorgeous, I can’t believe it!”

Suddenly fatigue is hits you and you slump into his embrace. You can feel yourself winding down. Sebastian lays you on the cool sheets, he moves to get up. “Sebastian, don’t go…” you plead softly.

“I’m right here, I’m just getting a washcloth to clean us up.” He replies. He’s back before you know it and a warm cloth presses against your legs. You spread them for him and he wipes you down, cleaning himself off as well. He lays down beside you and you feel your thick blanket cover you. Sleep slowly pulls you under 

“Sebastian?” you murmur.

“Mhmmm? What is it, my lady?”

“What time is it now?”

“Midnight.”

A/N: We aren't done. There's more to come darlings.

Likes and Reblogs are much appreciated and comments will fuel the writing engine.

Masterlist