#doesn't stop him

[present-mom-blog]

Atsushi needs reading glasses (based off of all those official arts of him with glasses).

Is he going to buy those glasses? Absolutely not. They're specially made for his eyes, because his eyes are abnormal, like everything about him. Making the reading glasses a little more expensive than the normal pair.

So Atsushi just goes about his life, squinting at things and refusing to buy reading glasses, because why would he buy something for himself when he could spend it on Kyouka-chan or save it?

(If those special made reading glasses show up at his desk one day, courtesy of Ranpo, no one comments on it.)

[softquietsteadylove]

Ok but what about Gil making some dad jokes? 😂

In the end he makes one that even Thena finds funny but would never admit!

Choose the AU 😁

"Hey."

"Hey," Gil greeted in return. He was watched as he dropped his bag off by the door and then moved further into the cabin--his cabin. But he was used to it.

The White Wolf hadn't been cleared to return to the field, much to her seething rage about it. Too much risk of infection walking around in the open, carrying gear, chafing, sweating, exposing it to open air. She was required to remain stationary for at least two weeks.

She had gotten off the call with the medic team and nearly thrown his laptop into the fire for it.

He had kept his promise, given her the space she was used to and the privacy she wanted. She stayed in his bed while he went to work, mostly read. And then when he got home she would complain about wanting to leave. It was their little routine.

"How is it out there?"

Gil raised a brow but just nodded, "pretty normal stuff."

Thena just nodded, setting her book aside. Some days she was a little less prickly. Usually it meant she wanted something.

He looked at her, "you hungry?"

She never admitted to actually needing anything from him. He was under the impression that if he didn't ask her directly she might wither away and starve. But she was a truly terrible cook when left to her own devices.

He was still trying to determine if that was an effect of being out in the woods for a year on her own, or if it was a pre-existing condition.

She nodded.

Gil smiled a little. They were getting more used to each other, and he knew the Wolf had a sense of humour in her somewhere. He put a hand to his ear, "what was that?"

"Fuck you."

Her words had no real bite to them anymore. He chuckled, "no, wasn't that."

Thena sighed and glared at him with all the vitriol in her 5'8" frame. "A little."

"Good," he grinned at her before looping into the semi-attached kitchen nook, "I'm a medium hungry myself."

Thena rolled her eyes visibly and loudly.

Gil let the little joke suffice and moved into the kitchen. "Dry season's coming, so there's a lot of extra trimming happening."

He didn't get an answer, but he wouldn't expect one from the Wolf. That didn't mean she wasn't listening, either.

"I walked by your last post. It's still intact," he continued as he pulled stuff out of the fridge. He didn't have much to work with, but Thena wasn't particularly picky either. Little thing could eat like a real monster if she liked something. "Do you need anything?"

After learning that she would be staying with him a little longer, he had gone back to her camp and packed up everything for her and brought it back here. She had been a little averse to him packing up her personals, but she let him bring her things to her. He had to assume she arranged and packed them more to her tastes while he was at work.

"Not to be trapped in your bed like an animal?"

"Hm," Gil murmured as he slid some ground hamburger and onions in a pan, "I don't think they have that at the drop-mart."

More silence, most definitely her groaning at his jokes again.

Once he was satisfied that he had the makings for a decent sauce, he set it on low to reduce and went back out to her. He leaned against the doorway. "Cleaned?"

She eyed him. He was asking about her healing burns. "Had a shower."

That wasn't exactly cleaning them with a saline solution, but he supposed it did technically qualify as being washed out. He came a little closer, "you need help with the bandages?"

She looked up at him. Sometimes - certainly not always - he could get some of her guard down. If he spoke softly, moved slowly, something about it could calm her usual worry and help her open up to him, even a little. She shook her head.

"Okay," he accepted without much argument. Less fuss the better, with the White Wolf. "Hey, I brought some stuff for you."

She gave him her driest, deadliest look, "if it's another stupid joke I swear to god-"

"Okay, okay," he chuckled as he bent down to his backpack and pulled it open. "Went to the station, found some stuff that might help pass the time."

Thena let him bring it over, depositing some books on the night table within her reach, setting down a couple of snacks. She picked up the peanuts immediately.

Gil watched her tear into them, really giving him the unfortunate impression that she hadn't done anything to feed herself while he was gone. "Sometimes I think all you eat is trail mix."

She glared at him as she shovelled more toasted peanuts in her mouth.

"But that's," he grinned at her, "just nuts."

She flicked one at him.

He caught it after it bounced off his forehead and popped it in his mouth. She could have all the nuts she wanted, really. Anything, so long as she was eating. "Don't fill up. I'm making spaghetti."

Thena's eyes widened and she tilted her head. She liked his spaghetti.

"I brought some coffee too," he continued as he went to actually put on the noodles, seeing as how his guest was apparently starving.

"Coffee?"

Ooh, that was really catching her fancy. Gil made a note to himself to bring more, and not just the instant stuff she could technically make for herself out in the woods.

"Coffee," he confirmed as he salted the pasta water. "But I had to file a report on it."

"File a report?"

He didn't look at her. It tended to put her on edge. But she had gotten out of bed just to verify his coffee story. He reached for the pasta, "yep--usual stuff, I was making some coffee and...it got mugged."

"Gilgamesh."

Whatever, he liked his dumb jokes. He laughed, ignoring how she was glaring at him for it. He bobbed his head to the side, "get out some bowls?"

Thena didn't love being told what to do, but she seemed to far prefer it to listening to him tell jokes straight out of an outdated 'dad' manual. She did retrieve some bowls for them.

After tossing the noodles in the sauce properly he served Thena first, and with a mountain's worth of noodles and meat sauce. She would get through it, and he would have more where that came from, too.

"Thanks," she muttered quietly. She did turn and leave without waiting for him, but he was charmed when she plunked his own bowl into his hand first. It was a small gesture, but it was about as outwardly caring as Thena could get.

She sat herself in front of the fire to eat, taking up the chair of his she liked the best to do so. She had his blanket around her bony little shoulders, probably after she had taken her shower and left her hair down to dry.

She might look cute if she weren't eating spaghetti like a starving dog.

Gil smiled as he sat down in his other chair next to her. He dug in too, just at a more human pace. It was good spaghetti at least. He peeked over at her.

She licked some sauce off her lips, repeating the motion like a dog licking its chops. She caught him staring and frowned, "what?"

Gil blushed. He hadn't meant to stare, let alone in any particular way, at any particular part of her. He cleared his throat, "uhm, I was, uh, gonna tell a vegetable joke."

She glared at him, cold as ice, daring him to go through with it.

He smiled down at his bowl, "but...it's a little corny."

He needed new material.

Thena laughed. It was quick, and light, and she held up her hand to hide her mouth, but she laughed.

Gil stared at her though, positively elated. She had a cute laugh. "Hey!"

She shook her head, trying to banish the smile from her face, "don't get any ideas."

"But you laughed!" he pointed, even risking her turning around and biting his finger off. "You're laughing!"

Thena faked a dramatic sigh and poked at her food, "maybe it's Stockholm, being cooped up here with you."

"No, you laughed at my joke," he continued to state with the utmost pride. And why the hell not? He had gotten a laugh out of the White Wolf. He felt like he had tamed a bear single handed. "Never thought I'd see the day."

Thena rolled her eyes at him but she didn't get up and leave him to eat alone, like the first night or two. She took another, slower bite. "Call it payment for all your help."

She didn't have to repay him for anything. Although hearing that beautiful laugh she had really was a nice bonus.

[shotmrmiller]

making the mistake of feeding plumber!ghost because he'd been fiddling with the pipe beneath your sink for quite a while and you'd only figured that you'd be a good host (?) and give him something to drink, at most offer him a granola bar or something but now you're shakily making him his third sandwich of the afternoon with extra sandwich meat ("don't skimp on it. man like me's gotta eat.")

you don't know whether he's gonna eat you out of your house and home or the skirt you'd put on to water your front yard earlier. by the way he pat your upper thighs (too close to your arse) when you'd have poured him a glass of freshly squeezed juice, you'd say the latter.

"c'mere. 'ave a seat," he pats his left leg as he says so, his right extended and placed on the only other chair you own.

(the moment you come within reach because the juice isn't going to refill itself, he pulls you to his lap anyway.)

[somnimagus]

out of the frying pan and into the fire and into another frying pan that's also on fire

[id in alt text]

[a-fangirltrash]

Do u guys think that Fiddleford sometimes accidentaly called Stanford darling, sweetheart and love because he kept mistaking him with his wife hahahah.... and that he was so sleep deprived once that this happened....

Yeah this is canon in my head like this would totally happen, he's not beating the cheating allegations

[bunnieswithknives]

AU based off Nature except I kept thinking about it too hard. Dales not a good dad, but its such an easy problem for him to throw money at, and what do you do when a part is damaged? Well, you replace it.

Basically an AU where Dev gets to experience medical trauma and realizes much sooner how much his dad doesn't love him

[doumekiss]

I am a 100% certain that in a dungeon meshi modern au Kabru would see minimum wage retail worker Laios and still develop an all consuming psychosexual obsession with him

[bluerosefox]

Playing Dead AU Guyyyyyyssss

I just had a random shenanigans idea...

Now hear me out.

You know those murder mystery parties right? The ones where people get together, an actor plays dead, and the groups have to figure out who did it.

Well what if.

Danny takes a summer job as the body/actor of the victim for those parties and actually is commented on being the best 'very lifelike dead body' actor and hey at least his 'medical condition' (halfa) is finally being useful for something (besides you know, fighting ghosts) he can even go hours without moving (or breathing) once he's dead so he doesn't ruin the immersion for party goers.

Anyways, what if he gets a job for a rich people's party, you know something novelty for the wealthy to have fun with, maybe it's the Wayne's hosting a party or maybe someone else and they invite the Wayne's. And the company he works for sends him to Gotham. He gets there, helps set up the clues and the other actors, etc etc.

Then the guests start showing up, Danny acts like the star of the show he is and then the lights cut out, he screams (very realistically), and 'dies' before the lights come back on. As some players come up to inspect his body however he doesn't notice how some take his pulse and actually fully think he's dead.

Point being, Danny is the 'dead' body for the murder mystery, goes to Gotham for a gig, 'dies' and the batfam think they have a legit murder happening.

[bonebabbles]

Toshiro Dungeon Meshi really said "I am an autistic man and I've suffered quietly my whole life, the way I'm supposed to, the way that's expected of me. The way you're supposed to, the way that I expect of you. It infuriates me that you don't. It envies me that you don't. I've never expressed this before because I don't know how and I snapped and all of my emotions came tumbling out and I said it in a way I don't actually mean, just like how you never mean it."

And then he said, "And then we fought. And you won, of course you did, and now we're talking openly because you're someone I CAN talk to. I always COULD talk to you. I just never DID. Of course you're taking this seriously. And you know I take it all seriously. Why are you like this? Why do I RECOIL every time you speak to me, even when you aren't doing anything wrong? How can a person even be like this?? Why do I sometimes wish that I could be like you?"

AND THEN HE SAID, "Wait. Please. I need you to know I do care about you. I can't tell you that directly because I have been taught my whole life that to love someone is to lessen their burden, to BE less of a burden, shrink yourself, don't have demands, don't have needs, don't eat more than the bare minimum to sustain yourself. I'm working on that now, because of my family, because of her, and because of you, but I still can't bring myself to settle the full weight of my being onto another person. Here is a magic bell that will let you safely become my burden. I will not lose you too."

The magic bell rolls around in Laios' bag and rings constantly because Toshiro didn't think to stuff it with a piece of paper before giving it to the most physically active fighter in the group who does all the runnining aroundening.

The one he JUST brawled for being imperceptive.

Blurting out that he would help him escape the Elf Cops took priority. He NEEDED Laios to know this so bad. I just know he was thinking about putting that bell in his hand as soon as he started sharing how he wished that he'd told Falin how much she meant to him sooner but was trying to think of the right moment. He was absolutely BESIEGED by the autistic swagger of the Touden siblings. How can you not start scratching the furniture thinking about it

[hedgehog-moss]

The farmer I buy hay (and some firewood) from hasn't had time for deliveries yet, and he texted me yesterday to ask what I needed most urgently, hay or wood. Selflessly, I said hay.

That /is/ the gate for hay deliveries! Great memory, Pirlouit. I see what are the important spots in your mental map.

I hope you realise that I'm sacrificing myself for you. By telling our neighbour to prioritise your food over my comfort.

But even if I didn't, I would prioritise you and your hay because I love you. I would freeze to death to ensure you are fed

Would you share your hay with me, though?

I see.

[poisonedfate]

start of scene:

end of scene:

bbc merlin - 03x08 The Eye of the Phoenix

one of my favourite parts about this whole thing is that never not once does arthur actually tell merlin to leave. he just repeats how he's "doing important things" and makes faces.

[sprnklersplashes]

shout out to leigh bardugo for creating a disabled character who can be described as "he doesn't let his disability stop him from achieving what he wants (threat)"

[voiider]

I need codependent Danny/Jason as a little treat (for me) and I love the idea of them having some sort of instant connection the moment they meet (bc ghost stuff idk)

Danny who's been dropped in Gotham with no way home (alt universe??) and he's been here for 36 hours and having a Very bad time senses a liminal being and immediately latches onto them heedless of the fact that his new best friend is shooting at some seedy guys in an alley and goes off about how stressed he is and how he can't make it back to the ghost zone and what a bad day he's been having (and it's important to note Danny is a littol ghost boy literally hanging off of Jason's neck as he floats aimlessly) and Jason is like "who are you??" And Danny is like "oh sorry I'm Danny lol" and then just continues lamenting his woes

And honestly ? This might as well happen. Nothing about this Danny guy(is he human?) gives Jason a bad vibe and tbh he's never felt more calm and level headed before so he just keeps up his usual Red Hood patrol and doesn't even think about it when he heads back to a safehouse and feeds Danny dinner (breakfast) before crashing for half the day

The only thing I actually need is Jason meeting up with the bats for some sort of Intel meeting and they're like "uhhh who's that" and Jason is like "that's Danny." And does not elaborate (very ".... What do you have there?" "A smoothie" vibes)

And it takes them a while to realize that these two have known each other for less than 12 hours and are literally attached at the hip

[omo321]

~followup to the previous doodle

Aoko volunteers to help Conan with catching Kid :] Kaito got dragged along for moral support since he's "bad at riddles". Shinichi's too bemused to consider calling him out.

[nelkcats]

Quacked up

Danny never thought that Desiree was serious on her threats, or at least the threats that had to do with "turning him into a duck and abandoning him in another dimension."

But it seems that even ghost genies had their limits, because the third time he "ruined her plans," she made good on her threat. Danny wasn't worried about Amity, Team Phantom could take care of that just fine.

He was more concerned about his webbed feet and duckbill. Plus the fact that he showed up in the middle of a warehouse occupied by mobsters, although the supposed mobsters were more involved in trying to catch him (were his ears wrong or had he heard an "aww"?) than killing him. One of them even named him "Duck Hood."

Jason didn't know how to feel watching all his employees chase a duck. It was a weird duck, with glowing green eyes (was it possible for a duck to dive into the pits??), and he was sure he saw it float by at some point, but at least his "lair" was a little more lively.

He wondered if he should give it to Damian or keep it.

[sunderwight]

Liushen AU where SY transmigrates into SJ's older brother, and subsequently nopes them right out of the slavery backstory by using his general knowledge of the story and actually being an adult in a kid's body to just leave (basically) with SJ and YQ.

SY carts them both up to Cang Qiong for the next sect trials. It's actually not all that hard, the trickiest part is getting enough to eat and finding safe places to sleep between leaving the slavers and taking the trials (SY manages just barely, with considerable help from his new little brothers.) Nobody bothers to go after them because it's before Qiu Jianluo and this style of human traffickers mostly operate by virtue of their merchandise having nowhere else to go. Chasing down runaways is an expense not worth indulging, given that most of them either come straight back or die of exposure.

Anyway, they take the trials, and as expected YQY gets chosen to become a personal disciple for the sect leader, and SJ gets chosen by the Qing Jing Peak Lord, but also as (kind of) expected (by SY alone) nobody wants SY. He's older the Yue Qi, so too old, and unlike YQ and SJ his cultivation potential isn't striking enough to make any exceptions for him.

SY, however, can't leave it at that. He's spent more than five minutes with the street kid codependency gang, so he's gotten attached to both of them. And he knows what will happen if they're left to their own devices and The Plot proceeds accordingly. (Also, they keep threatening to not stay at the sect if SY doesn't stay too, for some reason.) So with a heavy heart and internal candle lit for himself, SY heads to Bai Zhan Peak. Which is the only peak that accepts disciples by way of them turning up and refusing to leave.

SY's not much of a fighter. He actually really hates the atmosphere on BZP, he's not bad at physical cultivation (his health's pretty good in this life, ironic considering how much worse his situation was) but the random ambushes and survival-of-the-fittest stuff is just not his brand. But that's okay, because it turns out that BZP actually DESPERATELY needs disciples on the actual peak who are interested in things other than fighting and cultivating their own strength. Stuff like, filling out requisition requests for An Ding every time things break, apologizing to An Ding every time things break again, organizing schedules, browbeating senior disciples into actually teaching, educating disciples on virtually any artistic or social skill, hosting lectures on how to beat vicious beasts without just overpowering them, and etc.

Okay so some of this stuff isn't and has never actually been on Bai Zhan's curriculum but Shen Yuan is going to make this place tolerable. And stop these children from needlessly getting acid burns or lyme disease or scurvy or whatever. He keeps internally chewing out Airplane for designing a sect system that means there are a lot of largely unsupervised 12-year-olds running around the wilderness on a mountain picking fights all the time. (When he actually meets Shang Qinghua and figures him out he switches to doing it in person, of course, in twice-monthly bitching sessions that look a lot like budding friendship.)

Of course one of the worst offenders is the Liu kid, who SY would suspect was actually raised by wolves if he didn't know for a fact that Liu Qingge has a younger sister, and also the kinds of nice clothing and letters from home that strongly imply not only does he have a family, but that the family is pretty well-off. Liu Qingge is at first deeply offended by SY being a BZP disciple. He rarely fights anyone, and uses tricks and evasion tactics whenever a fight can't be avoided. And he does other annoying stuff, like pestering him about meals and baths and lecturing him on identifying dangerous plants and the early signs of qi deviation. This is not what their peak is about! He should get with the program already! Just fight stuff until you're too tired to keep fighting stuff!

Also SY's younger brother, SJ, is pure evil (at least according to baby Liu Qingge) even though his other younger brother (?) is cool and nice.

Anyway, Liu Qingge stops complaining about SY after their first mission together, where Liu Qingge doesn't lose a fight but does get into a kind of pyrrhic victory situation where he's really badly hurt, and it's SY who helps him win (correctly identifying the monster and then pointing out its weakness) and takes care of him afterwards and gets him safely back to Cang Qiong. SY expresses surprise at LQG actually being polite to him, and LQG realizes that he's been a colossal ass if people think he wouldn't be grateful to someone who saved his life, so the usual Liushen dynamic proceeds from there. Liu Qingge starts bringing SY fans he leaves behind and hunts down animals that are supposed to be useful for bolstering weak cultivation, SY invites LQG to tea and keeps the critters as pets, etc etc.

SY doesn't get the Head Disciple position, because that's only acquired via beating the current peak lord in combat and lol no. Also he's not interested in stealing it from Liu Qingge, to whom it rightfully belongs (in his mind). But that's fine, because Liu Qingge takes the position when the next generation ascends and then he lets SY exclusively handle all the peak duties SY actually likes (mainly teaching). It's perfect -- Liu Qingge gets to focus on his War God antics and occasional administration/meetings without having to deal with students his has no patience for, but the disciples of BZP don't get neglected because SY is actually teaching and organizing classes and student care. BZP hasn't enjoyed a golden age like this since it was founded!

Things are pretty good overall, but Shen Yuan knows that it's only a matter of time before The Plot shows up, and so he can't rest completely easily.

Meanwhile, the will-they-or-won't-they bets on Liushen have been going strong for a while now. The thing is, most of their martial siblings are convinced that these two are already "together", and just being circumspect about it. Those who know SY well (like SJ, YQY, and SQH) know better but think that SY's romantic obtuseness is to blame, whereas those who know LQG well (LMY, WQW, and MQF) are pretty sure that it's actually LQG's obtuseness that's the problem. Of course it's actually both of them, so efforts to "fix" matters by getting through one of their thick skulls inevitably run afoul of the other's.

An additional complication is of course: SJ doesn't like LQG (mutual), and now that he's the leader of his own peak, he wants to poach SY to come and live there. Not only so he can have one of the 2 people he trusts actually close at hand, but also because SJ also hates actually teaching the atrocious little brats on his peak, and would like to have SY come and do it for him. YQY is still a total pushover for him too, and is also now the sect leader, so YQY agrees that SY can change peaks if SY and LQG both agree to it.

Liu Qingge, of course, is a no, but he's a variable "no". He's not going to hold Shen Yuan against his will or anything.

As for Shen Yuan, it's... complicated. He doesn't really like BZP, but it's gotten a lot better than it was at the start. These days he's actually pretty proud of his accomplishments, and it's more comfortable, but it's still a rough and rowdy place with fewer creature comforts, libraries, or other appealing points than QJP. Also, if he goes to Qing Jing to teach, he can personally ensure that SJ doesn't go around persecuting any of his students!

But... SJ never lived with the Qiu family in this AU, and even though SY's not totally clear on what the PIDW backstory for SJ was, he knows he's a better guy now than the scum villain in the book was. He has a reputation for making cutting remarks, not for being an abusive snake or a lecher. SY's honestly less worried about him doing anything bad at all, and there are other people on QJP who can teach. It might even be good for SJ to promote more people to fill out a social circle he can rely on! That guy needs more friends, seriously.

And QJP really doesn't need more layabout literary intellectual types who get into pointless arguments, which is all SY would be if he went there. Just yet another nerdy scholar for the rich kids with middling cultivation that the peak favors to ignore. At least on BZP he's filling a gap.

SY is clearly torn, and the fact that SY's considering it has LQG upset, and LQG doesn't handle being upset very well, so of course they have an argument about it. SY storms off to cool his head and LQG is like, this is it, he's gone to Qing Jing Peak, I've drive him off by being too aggressive and he's probably remembering all those times I told him he didn't belong here and oh no what have I done maybe if I build him a heated bath and get him books he will come back???

Turns out that SY just went to An Ding to vent at SQH while SQH was like "I think you would have fewer problems if you and Liu Qingge just got married and my disciples could call you Shigu to your face instead of behind your back" and SY threw melon seeds at him and sulked on his fainting couch (which is always cold for some reason...)

Thus begins the Liushen Divorce Arc where SY tries to be anywhere but BZP or QJP, Liu Qingge tries to figure out what thing he can punch to fix this not-punchable problem, SJ is like "I don't see what the big deal is they should break up Liu Qingge is awful and I want my brother to teach my classes for me" like the spoiled youngest sibling he's finally allowed to be, YQY is trying to moderate this Hades vs Demeter situation and is all "well maybe SY could spend half the year on QJP and half on BZP?", and Liu Mingyan is going "I know my brother if this doesn't work out he is going to die single and pining like an idiot" and so keeps conscripting other disciples to y'know, lock SY and LQG into storage closets together (ineffective: LQG can punch through walls) or at least get them in the same room (underestimating SY's willingness to yeet himself out of windows to avoid awkward social interactions.)

By the time Luo Binghe joins the sect (as a Qiong Ding disciple), the drama is in full swing and is the main topic of gossip across most of the peaks.