#emotional control

[safe-haven-safe-place]

[travelersrest]

🐘🌺🐘

[honeycombhank]

3/10/24

3.10 miles in the the cold wind and rain out in the country today.

I thought I was going to have a siezure while playing games with my family and had to sneak away, a walk was actually just what I needed, it doesn’t always keep my episodes from coming on but today it did.

[bipolardumpsterrat]

For the people who can’t find the right word to describe how their feeling.

This has been a good tool for me personally

[headphones-lifeform]

Zohar's Emotional Regulation Methods

@spocks-bikini-and-datas-bra I hope this is alright...

Here is a list of emotional regulation methods [and one physical sensation regulation method] that I personally use.

As this list is personal, these may not work for you- but that does not mean you cannot practice emotional regulation. Everyone's minds are different :].

I am still working on learning and finding what works for me, so you may find the list expanding later on. I am currently practicing nullification of pain, for example.

The list is below the "keep reading":

Basic Meditation

this technique is the backbone of some of the others, as its goal is to have your mind enter a state in which you can control it.

What personally works for me is a mantra that I mentally repeat until I achieve the desired state of mind. I use variations of the classic "I am in control of my emotions", but you can use whatever works for you.

"I do not experience X"

I borrowed this technique from a headcanon by @protectspock:

@protectspock, I thought you might like to know that your headcanon works- mentally repeating "I do not experience sadness" has helped me go weeks at a time without crying!

Heartbeat

If you find yourself too tense to practice the previous techniques, touch your fingers to an area where your heartbeat is strongly felt [temples, wrist, fingertips etc]. If you are experiencing strong emotion your heartbeat will probably be faster than usual.

Focus on your heartbeat and wait for it to slow down. It should help at least a little.

Audio Block

This technique, should it work for you, will muffle loud noises and should help those with a hypersensitive sense of hearing.

There is a certain muscle in your inner ear you can tense to create a crackling noise. Attempt to access it.

VERY IMPORTANT: if you cannot tense this muscle, I cannot personally teach you this technique as my use of it relies on it.

If you can tense this muscle, do so and take a deep breath through your nose. This should create a pressure chamber in your inner ear muffling audio.

However, this technique can only be used for a short time as it limits your oxygen intake. Be careful!

[craycraybluejay]

Mind over matter. Logic over emotion. In the face of oblivion, you must learn to laugh when you want to cry and THINK when you want to give up and die.

[azyra-ozul]

Mushin - The State of No Mind in Martial Arts

Mushin, also known as "No mind," is a mental state that experienced martial artists strive to achieve. It's a state where thoughts, emotions, and distractions fade away, leaving behind pure awareness and instinct. In this post, we'll explore the concept of Mushin, how it's achieved, and its significance in martial arts.

What Is Mushin? Mushin is a term rooted in Zen Buddhism and is often translated as "No mind." In the context of martial arts, it refers to a mental state where conscious thought, hesitation, and overthinking are absent. Instead, the martial artist acts purely on instinct and without cognitive interference.

The Characteristics of Mushin:

Clarity: In Mushin, the mind is clear and focused. Distractions and doubt are absent, allowing the martial artist to see and respond to the situation with heightened awareness.

Instinctive Reaction: Actions are spontaneous and instinctual. Techniques flow without conscious thought, making movements more efficient and effective.

Timelessness: In Mushin, the perception of time becomes distorted. Past and future are irrelevant, and the martial artist lives entirely in the present moment.

Enhanced Performance: Achieving Mushin often leads to peak performance. Martial artists can execute techniques with precision, speed, and power.

How to Achieve Mushin:

Training and Repetition: Mushin is a result of years of dedicated training and repetition. By mastering techniques, martial artists can perform them without conscious thought.

Focused Meditation: Meditation and mindfulness practices help martial artists develop concentration, calmness, and self-awareness.

Controlled Breathing: Breath control is essential in achieving Mushin. Controlled and rhythmic breathing helps calm the mind and maintain focus.

The Significance of Mushin in Martial Arts: Mushin is highly regarded in martial arts for several reasons:

Efficiency: Actions in Mushin are streamlined and precise, resulting in more efficient techniques and movements.

Self-Defense: In high-pressure situations, Mushin allows martial artists to respond instantly and protect themselves effectively.

Emotional Control: Mushin helps martial artists remain composed and not act impulsively based on fear, anger, or other emotions.

Spiritual Growth: For some, Mushin is a path to personal and spiritual growth, transcending physical combat and reaching a higher understanding of the self.

Mushin, the state of "No mind," is a sought-after mental state in martial arts. Achieving Mushin requires dedicated training, meditation, and breath control. It offers martial artists a higher level of efficiency, self-defense capabilities, emotional control, and potential for spiritual growth. It's a state where the mind and body work in perfect harmony, allowing martial artists to perform at their best.

one can apply the principles of Mushin or "No Mind" to daily life, not just in martial arts. The state of Mushin involves being fully present, focused, and free from distractions. Here are some ways to incorporate Mushin into your daily life:

Mindful Living: Practice mindfulness in everyday activities like walking, eating, and working. Be fully present in each moment and avoid multitasking.

Letting Go: Release attachment to outcomes and expectations. Accept things as they come without judgment or resistance.

Emotional Control: Learn to manage your emotions and remain calm under pressure, just like in martial arts. This can improve decision-making and relationships.

Stay Present: Avoid dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. Focus on the here and now.

Flow State: Find activities you're passionate about and enter a flow state, where you're fully immersed and lose track of time.

Meditation: Regular meditation practice can help you develop greater awareness, concentration, and emotional control.

Simplicity: Simplify your life to reduce mental clutter. Let go of unnecessary possessions, commitments, and distractions.

Adaptability: Be open to change and embrace the challenges life presents. Approach each situation with a clear and flexible mind.

Mushin can be a valuable mindset for personal growth, inner peace, and achieving a sense of flow in daily life.

[motivationlinkllc]

In a world driven by deadlines and busy schedules, mastering the art of time management is crucial. However, success isn’t solely dependent on managing your hours efficiently; it also hinges on another essential factor—emotional intelligence. Developing emotional intelligence is the key to navigating the intricate web of human interactions and achieving personal and professional success.

[friendlysatan]

You see her? A shadow of who she used to be. A reflection of who she wishes to be. A shell of who she will never be.

These combine at the end to be who you see.

But is it truly her or who she wants you to see?

[safe-haven-safe-place]

[bakary-potter]

Everyone is a murderer. You just need a good reason and a bad day.

[unwelcome-ozian]

[vizthedatum]

Look, it’s incredibly hard and vulnerable for me to publicly admit that I have fallen for several relationships that were essentially based on manipulation and illusion (multiple relationships with narcissists).

I am very used to being used up as a prop.

(If only any of you knew how I wish that I weren’t in relationships for over the past decade were my love languages were used against me - or worse, not given to me at all. I have found it incredibly frustrating that I try my best to be understanding of others’ human conditions, while they cannot even comprehend mine. And then when they push me into a reactive state to impose control, it hurts even worse because they try to strip me of the way I naturally love and care. I am still regaining it. I love to love, and, through my friends and partnerships (which I’m taking slow and in a very different direction than ever before), I am being loved. And I am open to it now - and I have higher standards now)

When I dared to stand up for myself or even question my exes or my mom (both actions are healthy things to do in relationships), it gets very ugly for me.

So while some people might think that the abuse I went through was just them “hurting my feelings,” it invalidates the following:

- how it felt like it was more abusive and longer lasting than all the physical assault and rapes I’ve been through. And that it eventually turned physical.

- the increase in inflammation in my body while I was with them that disabled me more and more

- the suppression of my identity if it did not match with their narrative

- me. It invalidates me. It invalidates all the processing and the therapy and the work I’ve been doing on myself. And while, I am working toward living my best life, I will not stand for such invalidation and disrespect any longer.

If only you knew how much I wish I weren’t so traumatized. If only you knew how much I yearn for a nesting partner who loved and supported me - so that I wouldn’t have to live in stress and fear. It’s not fun to be like this. I am painfully aware that people are ridiculing me. But they have my whole life - so - I’m going to be so unapologetically me so that, even if y’all think I’m crazy and not worthy of being lovingly touched or even comforted when I’m going through a hard time… or believed, I will succeed in this life. And I will rub it in all of your faces. I will divert all my care that I have given to the wrong people back to myself and the people who actually show me reciprocal love.

[slavy77]

We have all heard of “fight of flight”. When a situation arises that makes us uncomfortable, there is a fight back or runaway reaction. It’s usually a gut reaction, instinct all based on emotions.

If you’re scared, you’re going to run. If you're angry you’re going to fight back.

This reaction is often based in emotion. It comes from our mindset which is anchored somewhere between instinct, experience and knowledge.

Emotion is a weird thing. Emotional intelligence is now a thing. It’s a study and there is science being poured into it. Emotional intelligence is about being able to control your emotions in order to be rational in your communication.

Emotional intelligence, while now being a real thing, seems to be quite rare these days. It seems like we have no control over our emotions, at least from what I see on that news. We have lost control of our emotions. As a society, we have given the power to our emotions, leading to what I see as an unstable world.

Emotions are natural. We all get the feels over certain things. It’s going to happen. The problem is when we don’t control them. In fact I feel like, in some cases, we don’t even try to control them. We just let them run rampant. It’s like being black-out drunk and being a complete fool. In fact, I’d say when we let emotion take complete control it is the exact same things. (We need a study).

Emotions can be powerful, especially when passion gets added to it. I remember times on my Pink Bandana board where I really wanted something and the board pushed back. I remember the frustration and anger flush into my system and I became snappy. I once or twice went off on them, taking it personal, which it wasn’t.

What a crappy leader I was in those situations. What a crappy person I was when I let my emotions take control, just like if I was black-out drunk.

We get nothing from letting our emotions control us. We only end up looking like a crazy person. We don’t gain support except from other emotionally-out-of-control people.

Politics, religion, social issues…all of these things get very dangerous when emotions are in control. We can’t think rationally. We react without empathy, without regard for others, without rationality.

I’m a very passionate person about some topics that you would be surprised about because I don’t make a scene about it. That’s because over the years I’ve learned to control my emotions and not let my passions make me look like a fool.

I truly credit this to my faith. My faith has made me realize that I’m a tiny little blip on the screen. My life here on Earth is blink of an eye in the grand scheme of things. While I’m very passionate about things, I try to lean back into my faith in God to calm me and how to express it in a way that I’m not going to be seen as crazy or hurt others.

My emotional control is because I have faith that I’m going to be ok and I don’t need everyone to agree with me. I learned this because I touch base with a daily self-help book called the Bible that is full of ways to be emotionally intelligent.

Emotions and passion are a combo for great motivation or to circle the drain. It’s your choice - black-out emotion drunk or control and build respect. It’s up to you.

[envihellbender]

“I’ve made sacrifices for you, now you have to do the same.” + MaDe

OCs: Mathias Iversen, Declan Gerritz

“A new hit for you,” Mathias said, causing Declan to jump in surprise. He had barely gotten through the door, and had not even greeted his partner before speaking. He simply came into the living room and began to take off his black coat. His almost white blonde hair looked windswept and his pale cheeks were red with exertion. “He’s an engineer for AriaTech. Caleb Holmes.”

“What did he do?” Declan asked, stretching and turning to his complex computer set up. He pulled a hair band from his wrist and pulled his messy, long black hair back out of his eyes.

“It’s more what his boss won’t do. So we need to make an example of one of his employees,” Mathias said simply hanging his coat up in the small hallway next to the living room. When he returned Declan’s bright green eyes were wide and fixed on him in panic. Mathias didn’t expect this response, what had he said? Did Declan assume he’d have to fight another hacker?

“What’s wrong, Dec? He doesn’t work with computers so-” Mathias began, his head tilted in confusion. Declan didn’t usually react like this, he saw their work as being like a computer game. One he was particularly dedicated to.

“I… I don’t want to do this,” Declan stammered. He squirmed in his computer chair and wrapped his arms around himself. He shrank into his shoulders and looked down at his knees. “This… This feels wrong.”

“Why? You’ve killed for me before,” Mathias said. Declan didn’t say ‘no’ to him, he always did whatever he asked. He didn’t even show any disapproval or reluctance most of the time.

“Yeah but… this doesn’t fit.” Declan’s expression looked as if he knew what he wanted to say in his head but he didn’t know how to describe it. “It’s like I’m going from killing the bad guys and the monsters to gunning for an NPC.”

“An… an NPC?”

“Yeah. A- a non-playable character. It’s like killing someone who’s not- they haven’t done anything. They’re not a gang member. They’re just…”

“They’re an enemy of ours by association.”

“That’s not- I don’t know if that’s-”

“Declan,” Mathias interrupted. He leaned over onto Declan’s computer table so that his face was inches away. “I’ve done so much for you. I take care of you. I’ve made sacrifices-”

“What sacrifices?” Declan snapped.

“Do I have to remind you of how I met you? How you stalked and-”

“That was ages ago. Why are you bringing that up now? I helped build your empire. You wouldn’t have any of this without me. You’d just be a drug runner still.” There was a glint of anger in Mathias’ silver eyes. He took a deep breath, and lifted a thin pale hand. His fingers took Declan’s chin and forced it upwards slightly, the terror in Declan’s green eyes spread to his quivering lips and shivering fingers.

“You don’t seem to understand what’s happening here. I am not asking you, I’m telling you. This isn’t your boyfriend making a request, this is your boss telling you exactly what you are going to do,” Mathias said quietly, his expression hardened.

“You- this is- you always said we were… Equal. You said-”

“Things change. I want him dead. You’re going to do it. Understand?” Declan nodded, Mathias softened and went to stroke Declan’s hair but he pulled away. He scowled and turned his attention back to his computer, his shoulder hunched as he didn’t want to look at who Mathias had become.

[raz-b-rose]

Being a naturally-quick-tempered person is the worst thing ever. I come onto the internet sometimes to share my thoughts with others and hear what they have to say, and I swore to myself I wouldn't engage in hateful behavior. But I never imagined how tempting it could be to chew someone out for a truly stupid or heinous comment. That's why I never made any kind of blog myself. I want to discuss common interests, but I don't want to give in to my darker instincts. I'm often left stewing in anger.

Dude, bro, I totally understand. Queen of Anger here.

What I have done to help keep myself in check when I find someone trying to get into an argument, and I start getting worked up is

Put my phone down for a few hours. I obviously stew over it, but I work through my thoughts before responding

Make absolutely sure I am responding in a tone that isn't sarcastic or vindictive. I try for logical and kind.

Somtime just don't respond. If they are looking for a fight and not a constructive conversation then it's not worth my time or emotional energy trying to talk to them.

It's so tempting to stoop down to their level and feel justified in responding in anger because "We are right" but remember they also believe "they are right".

Try to see where they are coming from with their beliefs, and reach a middle ground.

And don't stew in anger. I don't know what your beliefs are, but prayer does so much for me. Doesn't always feel like it, but I know God is listening, I know he can understand my emotions, and I know that at the end of the day, He is victorious.

And another thing to remember, is if you start a blog you can make it whatever you want. Block people if it's really messing with your ability to control yourself. Follow blogs that are as feel good as feel good gets and filter any tags from those blogs that again tempt you into anger.

You are in control of your reactions, you control your online experience. Don't let anyone try to tell you otherwise. Your emotions do not control you. You're the boss here. You can do this!