#exclusively for the purpose of fucking with batman

[desatu]

he likes the bows (og prompt by @im-totally-not-an-alien-2 +reblogs here)

[martyrbat]

batman/tmnt adventures #3

[ID: Dick Grayson and Barbara Gordon in their respective costumes as they talk to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Mikey is oversharing to Robin, “Your cape is so awesome. I'm not allowed to wear one anymore. There was an incident with a blender. I don't really want to get into it.” Dick looks dejected as he says okay but Mikey continues anyway, “It got caught in there and I was sent flying around the room.” Robin tells him, “You don't really have to talk about—” but Mikey still talks, “Got pizza stainss in my favorite pair of underwear.” Robin begs Michelangelo, “Please stop.”

Meanwhile, Donnie is staring at Barbara enamoured. He tells her, “So Batgirl, I like your cape, too.” Babs bemusedly responds, “Thanks? You have a nice shell...?” Raph walks away while sarcastically commenting, “Nope. This isn't awkward on any level.” as Donnie beams at the awkward compliment! He boasts, “I was born with it. I think it really accents my—” he's cut off by Babs exclaiming in surprise at the arrival of Master Splinter! In the background, April is eyeing a befuddled looking Robin with a slight smirk. END ID]

[hana-no-seiiki]

Good news. Did some decent progress on What’s Up Danger so you guys will finally get fed this Wednesday! Bad news, the quality might not be the best since I’m fasting while writing it oTL

Anyways, here are some Batfam w/ Cat Villain! Reader moments/snippets.

TW YANDERE AND MENTION OF NONCON/SOMNO

Both Jason and Reader’s first words to each other were, “What the fuck.”

Reader referring to Jason being a giant, and violent asf esp in comparison to Dick. While Jason was confused at his heart beating so fast and mildly crushing on you while you were fighting.

Bonus points: You guys did the spiderman point meme.

You have the biggest age gap with Dick. I headcannon the boys to be close in age so there wouldn’t be any not so good implications when it comes to relationships, but it’s almost unavoidable unless Batman switches sidekicks every year or so. (You are younger than Jason but older than Tim)

But that is also another reason why you two didn’t click as well as you did with Jason

You’d often make jokes or use slang and Dick would just be “???” He tried his best though.

On the reverse side of things, and like I mention before Tim and you got along too well as friends. He’s one of the few people you could gush to about literally any fandom and he somehow (through stalking your searches and literally every gadget/appliance you owned) knew everything about it already.

You two have written several theses on fellow vigilantes and villains (mostly ‘dumb’ ones like who has the best cake based on so and so criteria)

Damian is the best when it comes to bantering with you mid-fight. It’s the combined years of sass and assassin training. Went from plain insults to whole ass (not so) subtly being horny when you beat each other down.

He’s also the worst (best?) when it comes to your nicknames. He insists that you two use it on each other. Some exclusive while others he’s usually fine hearing from other mouths.

There was one point in time where you were called Kitten while the boys forced/bribed you to call them Daddy

Tim and Jason have tattoos of you/related to you.

For Jason it’s your name with a few paw prints, and for Tim it’s when he first fought you (and got his ass whooped)

After Jason came back and revealed himself to you, he tattooed the scratch marks you left him on his back after doing the deed.

Damian secretly practices doing henna so he can draw on you during your “wedding” since he doesn’t want anyone touching you. Sort of defeats the purpose, but go off king.

Being the thorough guy he is, he uses lab equipment to make his own blends.

Bruce? Bruce hates your ass. Sometimes it’s in a hatefuckey way but most of the time he blames you for corrupting his kids.

So he corrupted you in turn.

I feel like he gets off to cucking them honestly (blame that one comic) but if Reader is AFAB I wouldn’t be surprised if he impregnated them.

He’s a softie at heart when it comes to you though, courtesy of your similarities with Selina.

Speaking of, Talia adores you.

Like if there was anyone she would want with her son it was you.

She thinks the fact that you haven’t been put behind bars is a testament to your skill, and after getting over your similarity to her “rival in love” she would actively get you to be with her son.

Eventually she realizes she loves you more than Bruce and well, that’s a story for another fic.

You have at least a dozen trackers on you at all times.

Most of them you’ve ingested and pooped out.

It’s mostly Tim of course. But the duty of actually feeding you that stuff usually goes to Dick.

Dick has uh- somnophillia’ed you a fair bit after the break up.

He really, and I mean really likes to watch you sleep.

It reminds him of those ‘catnaps’ you’d take while watching over the Titans.

There would be times where he’d just be in a daze/in autopilot for hours reminiscing about your past together

His favorite memories to go back to were your first fight together, first kiss, and times under the sheets, and a date you guys had before in a festival/circus.

He never takes the antidote for Poison Ivy’s sex pollen and always comes to you for it, regardless of his or your relationship status.

Tim has at least a million typewritten chats with AI you, and around a few hundred hours of voice chats.

You did eventually take his virginity.

He came as soon as he was inside you/you were inside him.

You have been offered to be a part of the bat crew or a vigilante. But,

you massacred many after Jason’s supposed death and feel too guilty to call yourself anything other than a villain.

Chokers with bells. It’s a popular gift to give you. Especially ones that are custom made with expensive ass materials and engraving.

Sometimes Tim just gives you weapons.

Alfred is your best source of blackmail material.

You’ve actively tried cursing him (with immortality). You love the man.

He’s secretly the president of your official fanclub/fansite but you didn’t hear that from me.

You fight a lot with Damian’s pets. Like in a way that you turn into a literal cat and hiss at them.

And last but not least, you’re vv close with every member of the Teen Titans (besties with Rachel and Garfield)

NOT PROOFREAD!!!

@sophiethewitch1

[benny-the-spaceman]

one of these days im going to release my tlm drafting headcanons from my notes app purgatory and that day is Today.

HERE'S HOW I THINK LEGO MOVIE CHARACTERS WOULD PREPARE AND MAKE DRAFTS

...under the cut

Batman

• Fairly good at drawing. Somehow able to draw straight lines without a ruler perfectly fine every single time but otherwise nothing super noteworthy (he does brag about this constantly however)

• Drafts in white and yellow posca pen??? will use white colored pencil for finer detail however, specifically one of those mechanical colored pencils

• Drafts on black paper because he thinks it makes his designs cooler (it doesn't)

• Dimensions in imperial and would be annoyed if you dare even *insinuate* he use metric. no justification here

• Doodles around his drafts, specifically likes to doodle bats and himself because he, once again, thanks it makes his drafts cooler (the bats kinda do)

• Refuses to leave notes on his designs. you either know what to do or you don't

• Does however write his drawing title obnoxiously large

• Used autocad for like a day, hated it, switched to solidworks and never went back

• Buys autodesk licenses for the rest of the masterbuilders. unwillingly, mind you, wyldstyle just knows his credit card information and abuses it

Benny

• Good at drawing exclusively spaceships. big shock i know

• The king of eyeballing a line or an angle and then labelling it however the fuck he wants. proper measurements take time he could spend drafting or making more spaceships, he'll save measuring and straightedges for drafts he deems important enough

• Uses blueprinting paper. there's no practical purpose for this, he just digs it

• Drafts with whatever writing utensil is on hand

• He gets inspired quite often so he usually keeps a drafting notepad on him just in case

• Leaves a *lot* of notes. Most of them are completely unnecessary and are a funny contrast to his haphazard dimensioning

• Pretty dang good at autocad! Usually reserves it for projects that require a lot more collaboration however

• Usually drafts in metric, can dimension in imperial but prefers not to

• 100% sets autocad to the light background like a monster

• Do not give him any 3d modelling software, he might blow up the computer

Emmet

• Either really good or really bad at drawings (obvs leaning towards bad. we remember the break in plans)

• Dimensions in imperial. I cant justify this one he just does. god bless america or something idk

• Owns a couple drafting pencils but rarely uses them, most of the time he drafts in marker or pen much to the chagrin of anyone who needs to read his drafts (or delight if you're unikitty)

• Started learning how to use autocad after taco tuesday and he's actually pretty good at it! he does use an architectural dimstyle for everything though which is particularly annoying when he's quite often not drafting buildings now

• Has labelled and colored layers 👍 enough said

• Uses disgustingly thick lineweights. horrible.

• Rarely if ever 3d models so he's not good at it, he mostly works on things that 2d conveys better anyways

• Although he's not the best drafter of the master builders, his construction background makes him the best at reading drafts, give him a unikitty draft and he can decipher it like it's nothing

Metalbeard

• Probably the best at drafting of the master builders, he's got the age advantage and lots of practice from making ships

• Drafts in pencil, quill, or charcoal depending

• Who needs straightedges or angle stencils when youre basically a pirate cyborg, expect robot like precision

• Doesn't use standard measuring conventions, instead opts to use the dumbest things possible. The Sea cow's units of measurement were seagulls. It isnt that he cant do normal units of measurement, he just prefers his made up ones

• Makes his drafting paper by himself

• Pretty good with 2d and 3d modelling surprisingly. He doesn't like either, however, he much prefers drafting on paper

• Leaves an average amount of notes on his drafts but has the most disgustingly fancy cursive and writes in his piratey english. Often a nightmare to read if you aren't used to his writing

• Will sometimes do blueprint swaps with Benny wherein they critique each other's work. not sure when they started doing it, but it's become a weekly activity for them

Unikitty

• Worst drafter of the main masterbuilder crew. Most people think it's because she's a cat but no she just doesnt take drafting seriously in the slightest

• Drafts like she's making an arts and crafts project. She has put several bottles of glitter on singular drafts and she will do it again

• Dimensions in rainbows, no knows what this means other than emmet

• Gives the longest, most complicated titles possible

• No such thing as straight lines

• Is entirely capable of drafting properly, just refuses to

• Leaves notes that are entirely unrelated to the draft. she wont tell you how youre supposed to connect two objects but she *will* tell you about the sandwich she ate while making the draft

• Doesnt use autocad, looks too boring

• Didnt use any 3d modelling softwares until she realized you can change the appearance of materials. that was a game changer. still much prefers drafting on paper though

• Likes drafting with emmet sometimes since he seems to be the only person who understands her drawings. to this day no one understands how he does it

Vitruvius

• Going blind has, surprisingly, not made him much worse at drafting, just changed his process a bit

• Drafts in pencil

• Probably the person who least frequently drafts of the main masterbuilders. On account of just not needing to and also on account of being dead

• Dimensions in the old anglo-saxon units of measurement

• Doesn't title his drafts and doesnt see a point in doing so

• Leaves the most vague, utterly confusing notes on his drawings. theyre still related to the drawings unlike unikitty's notes, but theyre very odd

• Doesn't use autocad or 3d modelling softwares, partially because he wouldnt really be able to on account of being blind but also partially because he doesn't really know what they are

• There isnt really much to say about his drafting skills he's about as normal of a drafter as a masterbuilder can be

Wyldstyle

• An engineering teacher's dream student. She may not have the amount of experience metalbeard has but she's still very skilled

• Doesn't like drafting on paper and won't if she doesn't have to

• When she does draft on paper she uses a drafting mechanical pencils. she also 100% collects them

• dimensions in metric to exactly 3 decimal places

• leaves very few if any notes (always very concise ones if included)

• has a case of staedtler stencils that she bought 4 years ago and never uses

• picked up a habit of doodling on drafts from batman but will never admit she got the habit from him

• Autocad PRO. Also really damn good at solidworks and fusion. Give this girl a computer and she'll give you a motorcycle assembly within the hour

• Specializes in automotives

• Spends time with Emmet on the weekends teaching him how to use digital drafting softwares (this process was incredibly frusturating at first but gets easier with time)

[britcision]

"other cultures have different ideas of freedom and duty" is this not still about the catgirl who very much wanted to leave but was prevented from doing so with an exploding slave collar?

Yeah, this is about the 10 year old that was bought from a freak show and kept trying to run away into the woods

So they put the exact same “don’t wander off” charm on her they put on the clan leader’s kid and trained her to be a ninja, and then when she was 17 and worked out how to break the charm they pretty much just shrugged it off and wished her well

(Note: buck fucking wild “don’t wander off” charm that makes a scary ghost lady chase you around with a knife until you go find the ninja who absolutely should not be a governess

No physical damage, but scary as shit and something that is actually worth calling the family out on)

People are real intent on calling it slavery because what actually happened was that she got bought by Eastern Islands Batman and put into service to his clan, to be trained along with a couple other girls he bought from similar parent free situations, and the young daughter of one of families who served the clan

Cuz y’see, to understand the concept of being in service, you have to understand that the feudal system is not in fact the modern West, and for a lot of people (3/4 of these girls in fact) being fed, trained, cared for, and given home and board was a pretty sweet deal and well worth deep and abiding loyalty

(And you get to be a ninja, also cool, and other exclusive things like an education and regular baths which were not available to common folks)

1/4 preferred actual freedom to do what she wanted when she wanted (our catgirl Izutsumi), so when they were convinced she wouldn’t actually immediately die or be stuffed back in another cage (breaking the curse), she got her wish

But the Asian man from the family they’re all in service to had a fight with our beloved autism creature Laios, and despite them coming out the other side still ride or die besties people have decided He Must Be Evil, so you get nuance-allergic takes like “HE PAID MONEY FOR HER THIS IS SLAVERY”

She was trained as a ninja and asked to help with chores like clearing snow off the roof in exchange for housing and food. Her only objection to staying was she didn’t like someone else picking what she ate day to day

To be fair though, the actual purpose of the curse was never addressed in the original source material (because it’s not particularly relevant), so a lot of people did get left with the idea that it would actually hurt or kill Izutsumi

It’s included in the Dungeon Guide, as is the nod that the curse is a fucking ridiculous thing to put on kids and an incredibly bad idea; this is why ninjas are not ideal governesses

There are so many things to rag on the Nakamoto family for. Refusing to understand that service to a feudal lord is not slavery just because it’s not what you were raised with is not one of them

The curse is, and much more personally satisfying to my mind, but people get real upset when you take their buzzwords away and it’s easier to cry “slavery!!!” than think for five minutes about another culture where you might be expected to have a duty to those who feed, shelter, train, and care for you

They didn’t let a marginalised preteen whose body had already been experimented on against her will run out into the woods alone, the greatest curtailment of freedom known to man

But for some reason admitting that they were missing key pieces of information and context is also a terribly difficult thing to do, so people would rather dig in and insist that understanding the concept of the feudal system is the same as supporting slavery

Not surprising on tumblr dot com, but always disappointing

For some people being wrong is terrifying and a personal attack that must be crushed

[dairy-farmer]

Bruce, as the pack leader and the stronger alpha is entitled to all of the pack's omegas - Jason, Tim and (aged up) Damian. The Pussy Right, if you will. Bruce is very protective of his omegas and doesn't even allow Dick - the second alpha of the pack - to mate with them too often, and NEVER while they're in heat. Only Bruce can sire pups on his omegas (he probably has either one or two pups with each omega). Besides there's little chance that Dick would impregnate them - omegas have successful ovulation almost exclusively with their pack alpha. Their bodies wanting only the best sperm. The best alpha to be their baby daddy. And who's better than batman himself? That means no eggy for Dicky, as long as Bruce is around, sadly. BUT THEN Bruce is away from home for quite some time, on a mission with the League in space or something. Dick decides it's time to have some fun at last. He establishes himself as the new pack leader and Bruce comes home only to be welcomed by his three very-pregnant-very-milky-titties omegas and one very smug Dick.

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 dick in this this is like that cat meme where someone is pointing a knife!!!!!

but yes I like this so much!!!! like in the animal kingdom where the top dog has primary breeding rights over the bitches. so bruce will fuck all his omegas and will occasionally breed with them, but he'll ever allow them to fulfill their one purpose and want. he'll reward dick's obedience with pussy but punish him by taking it away from him. he also will NEVER allow dick to sire a pup of his own, forcing him to watch as the omegas care for all of the pups bruce sired with them but never giving him the same luxary.

because bruce is a prime specimen the best alpha around to give nice strong pups to his breeding and milking omegas. poor dick 😢😔😞.

he tries sometimes. he sniffs around the omegas when they approach. especially tim who smells so milky sweet and makes the gentlest sounds when dick fucks him.

jason and dick are a bit hard headed for omegas but tim?? of tim is all sweet angles and soft curves.

when bruce goes away for an extended mission and Gotham gets hit with a chemical attack that sends people into sudden ruts and heats well....

dick just can't leave these three omegas to suffer can he?

it's easy to slide into bruce's place. to take his spot in the pack and claim each and every omegas and fuck them full of his fat knot. dick isn't a savage alpha. he won't crush the skulls of the pups bruce has already sired to cleanse the gene pool, he's not a fucking monster. but from now on all the pups born from the Wayne pack will be dick's.

and from how his omegas curl around him and cover hom with their scent- there's nothing bruce will be able to do about that.

because what good is a pack alpha without any omegas?

[ravenkinnie]

this might be controversial but I think more people would get into comic books if there was consistency in their writing, publishing, and some guidelines on legacy titles and long-standing characters and how to get into those rather than, you know. another flashy event to keep track of.

[theramseyloft]

i read your long pigeon poop post, and after some poking around online i saw that a loft in melbourne australia failed. do you have any idea why that is?

Oh... my fucking God. I am so furious.

Look at this thing!

$70,000 went into this monstrosity?

It looks like they converted a fucking water tower by punching holes in it and welding on entryways shaped like the stereotypical toddler’s first house drawing!

Who fucking researched this?!

Was it designed by a committee purely by aesthetic?!

Here is an article I found on it’s decomission and removal.

https://www.theage.com.au/national/victoria/melbourne-city-councils-70000-pigeon-loft-turned-into-scrap-metal-20160724-gqcmsc.html

According to the pigeon expert quoted in this article: 

“Frank Hayes is the president of the Australian National Pigeon Association. While his group is mostly interested in show pigeons, a different breed to the city pests, he says it was fairly predictable the coop idea was never going to work.”

“ "The nature of the pigeon is that they find a home and they stick with it. So finding them somewhere else to go is a bit of a dream," said Mr Hayes.”

“ "Trying to shift them is one big headache. It's a worldwide problem and no one has ever figured out how to deal with it." ” 

LOOK at this structure!!!

It’s made of fucking METAL!!!

In AUSTRAILIA!!!

In the fucking OPEN!!!!

From this charming article:

 http://melbournedailyphotodaily.blogspot.com/2011/03/pigeon-loft-batman-park.html

“The loft is painted with light coloured corrosion resistant to reflect the heat and minimise internal over-heating. It houses two hundred nesting boxes for pigeon breeding. Eggs laid will be replaced with artificial eggs intended as a humane way to control and reduce pigeon numbers.”

That is a metal structure in the Melbourne sun...

No amount of Paint is gonna make that less an oven.

And I can’t imagine you can add anything to paint to make it corrosion resistant that isn’t noxious in a small space when the metal under it heats up.

“Bird feeding around the loft base is permitted to attract birds out of the CBD to this area. Bird feeding is not permitted in any other area around the CBD.”

But the city council is not actually providing the birds with good quality fed...

“... and no one has ever figured out how to deal with it."

No one, you ignorant twit?

NO ONE?!?!

Here is the site of a successful branch of the German Stadttauben Projekt, translated:

https://stadttauben-stuttgart.de/

“The Stuttgart pigeon project

Dear prospective customers,

nice that you found our homepage. We would like to introduce our project to you on the following pages:

The Stuttgart City Pigeon Project is an animal welfare-friendly concept for regulating and reducing city pigeons for the benefit of people and animals. We operate several supervised pigeon shots in the Stuttgart city area, in which the pigeons are cared for and their eggs are exchanged for dummies so that no offspring hatch. By the end of 2019, there had been well over 45,000 eggs. By feeding grain mixtures in our shots, the animals are no longer forced to look for food on the streets and squares in the area. They spend 80% of the day and the entire night in the dovecote. Ergo - your droppings also stay there and no longer land on roofs or balconies.

We were awarded the Baden-Württemberg State Animal Protection Award 2015 for our commitment .

The city pigeon is one of the most successful residents of the urban living space and today populates all major cities worldwide. It is the free-living descendant of the wild rock pigeons from the coastal and mountain areas in Africa and Eurasia. Long ago, the rock pigeons were domesticated by humans primarily for the purpose of meat production and thus also carried to our latitudes and cities. In modern times, the stock of the archetypal rock pigeon increasingly mixed with breeding, racing and sports pigeons that either escaped, were abandoned or, exhausted by exhausting competitive flights, ran aground in the cities. Today's city pigeons are the overgrown children and children's children of these rock, breeding and sports pigeons.

In cooperation with the state capital of Stuttgart, the Tierschutzverein Stuttgart und Umgebung eV launched the pigeon project in 2008. The cooperation was formed with the aim of bringing about a permanent and humane solution to the city pigeon problem.

The concept of the Federal Working Group for City Pigeons or the so-called * Augsburg Model * was helpful. It is based on scientific publications, practical experience and has already been successfully recommended by several federal states such as Hesse, North Rhine-Westphalia and Baden-Württemberg. Today it is implemented in more than 80 German cities and towns. For example, there are pigeon houses looked after in Aachen, Augsburg, Hamburg, Berlin, Frankfurt, Saarbrücken and Wuppertal.

We aim for a small, supervised and healthy pigeon population in Stuttgart. Then the image of the city pigeon may rise again. Because healthy animals, which have a permanent home and receive animal feed, do not bother anyone!”

https://stadttauben-stuttgart.de/?page=1,0,0,Chronik+%26+Fakten

“Care instead of fighting: our chronicle

2008:The first step was a dovecote at platform 1 in Stuttgart main station

2009:The second blow was made in the roof of the Leonhardskirche

2009:The third pigeon house was on the Mühlgrün parking garage in Bad-Cannstatt, which has since been demolished and replaced by the pigeon tower in the rope

2010:The fourth facility was the pigeon tower in the city garden on Max-Kade-Weg

2011:The fifth pigeon house stood on the roof of the town hall garage until February 2016. Reconstruction on the roof of the city comb in April 2016.

2011:The sixth dovecote was a second stroke on the roof of the Leonhardskirche (other roof side)

2013:The seventh dovecote was built in the roof of the Fairkauf building in Stuttgart-Feuerbach

2014:The eighth pigeon loft was built (as a replacement for the location at the main station) on a flat roof in the Kriegsbergstrasse

2016:Dovecote number 9 was inaugurated in July 2016 at the Marienplatz in Stuttgart in the roof structure of the imperial building

2017:

On Landhausstrasse in the east of Stuttgart, we were able to set up dovecote No. 10 in the attic of a residential building. It was opened in June 2017

2018:In summer, an indoor pigeon tower was opened at Seilerwasen in Bad Cannstatt as a replacement for the Mühlgrün pigeon house

2019In autumn a new pigeon facility was inaugurated at the station in Zuffenhausen and the first egg was laid in December.    

In addition, a dovecote (trailer) on the grounds of the shelter Stuttgart and Nistwand for about 30 pigeons on the will of the ASPCA Stuttgart  House  Adam Müller-Guttenbrunn in Stuttgart Zuffenhausen care.

... more dovecotes are to follow!

Health hazard facts

A health hazard due to pigeons flying around, running and sitting can be largely excluded. New scientific studies have shown (again) that pathogens that may be contained in the pigeon droppings are usually bird-specific and are therefore not transmitted to humans. This was confirmed in 1995 by the Federal Ministry of Health.

The general classification of the pigeon as a pest was withdrawn by the Federal Institute for Consumer Health Protection back in 1989 on the basis of research results at the time and the opinion from 2001.

Feed facts about pigeons

Feeding pigeons in Stuttgart is prohibited on public land. Well-meaning pigeon friends increase the population density of the city pigeons by regular feeding in the same place, without offering the additionally attracted animals sleeping and nesting places where they are tolerated or the clutch can be exchanged. This creates people who work there or often live more pigeon hate and more pigeon misery.

Above all, too many food scraps are thrown away on the streets and squares of the city! This waste is mostly not compatible with pigeons. They lead to illnesses, shortages and thus, among other things, to the unsightly liquid starvation. Nevertheless, due to the scarcity of bird-friendly feed in cities, these human foods are usually the main basis for the feeding of city pigeons, but their organism is designed for pure hard grain feed. So this means sick pigeon populations that nonetheless reproduce disproportionately due to their (pet) genes raised by humans.

If you would like to help sustainably, please contact us. Only other supervised dovecotes in the city area (including food and egg exchange) start at the root of the "problem". We welcome any support!”

From their gallery:

Here is a loft.

Small, wooden, well insulated from heat and cold.

Those openings are not the nests. They are just doorways with a landing ledge designed around the comfort of pigeons, which are social birds.

Here is the inside.

Lots of comfortable nest boxes, perches in the back, food, water, comfortable socialization space...

Here is an entry into another loft currently in use.

Here is the inside.

Water and feed are provided by the care takers. You can see feed and drinking stations all over the floor.

And this is the inside of a huge new loft in Frankfurt.

These German Taubbenhauses are designed around meeting the birds’ needs for food, comfort, safety from the elements, and socialization with their flock mates.

None of these birds had to be coerced or forcibly relocated.

Because their needs were better met, they came on their own.

Look at the $70,000 Melbourne monstronsity again!

More specifically, look at the bridge behind it.

And tell me where you would rather me.

Compact metal tower designed exclusively around convenient human access, metal nest boxes, 0 landing platforms, no socialization space, no protection from the elements, still no choice but to forage for what ever garbage people toss you...

or the comfortably Cool space under a concrete bridge with a convenient water source.

Three guesses what’s more comfortable for the pigeons.

Now, would you rather live under a bridge with constant noise from traffic, open to predators, 

or

A well insulated apartment building with comfortable suites, a spacious common area, and a nutritious free meal plan with clean water included by default.

"It's a worldwide problem and no one has ever figured out how to deal with it."

My ass, Mr. Hayes!

[mochegato]

Pixie Spy

Written for the Jasonette July Wayne Gala prompt.

Why?!? Why was she doing this again? Oh right, because John Constantine promised to give her some help with a particularly difficult part of the Grimoire if she did.  And he needed the information he was currently obtaining in order to give said help.  That is how she ended up with an invitation, still not sure how Constantine pulled that off, to the most exclusive event of the year, the Wayne Gala.  

Plus, Adrien was kind of right, ordinarily it would be a great opportunity to showcase her designs. The problem was on its surface, her dress wasn't one of her best works. The black dress had a high, cowl neckline in front and in back, adding a bit of drama and a small homage to the local heroes, vigilantes she silently corrected herself.  The high neckline also offset the incredibly short bubble skirt, making her legs look longer than the Nile.  Despite being a bit uncomfortable showing that much leg, it was necessary for this particular design and if she could actually feel like she had long legs for once, she was willing to deal with the discomfort.  She also added a glittery belt to show her shape and add some bling, which seemed like something the people at this particular event would value.  It was functional, not fashionable.  Not that it was ugly, just that it was designed to be passable, enough to fit in but not enough to get noticed.

She fidgeted slightly as she stood in the entryway trying to get past the people piling up trying to not so discretely pay homage to the king.  That king being Bruce Wayne. From her research, he actually did seem like he was a good guy. The list of charities he started or contributed to was longer than she was tall. She scowled at the voice in the back of her head that sounded suspiciously like Adrien's saying that wasn't much.  Adrien, who got out of coming tonight because the mission was to observe the Waynes unnoticed and Adrien Agreste would get a bit too much attention, that cat bastard.

Despite the laundry list of charity work, Marinette was still suspicious of Wayne.  First of all, he was rich, filthy rich.  Anyone that rich had to have some dark and twisted secrets they were hiding.  He wouldn’t be the first rich person to hide their illicit activities behind a veil of charity work.  Second, he chose to live in Gotham, the most crime-riddled city in the world.  And that is just the reported crime.  A great deal of the crime never got reported to or investigated by the police, whether through corruption or exhaustion.  The kind of place a rich person could be confident they would get away with literal murder.

But mostly, it was Constantine that made her suspicious of Bruce Wayne.  Not that Constantine had ever said anything negative about him, well nothing more than calling him a pain in the ass, but that was really not so much an insult as a compliment coming from Constantine.  But, Wayne had information Constantine needed to help them with the Grimoire and Constantine refused to say how Wayne had gotten that information. How and why would a playboy billionaire have that information?  There is absolutely no reason someone outside of the hero/villain/magic community would have that information.  And, if he was such a good guy, why would Constantine need to go to these lengths to get it without Wayne’s knowledge?  Unless it was related to one of his illicit secrets.

Her eyes darted around the room taking in its grandeur, muttering to herself about how ostentatious it all was.  Normally, she would be completely mesmerized by the grandeur and pomp of the scene.  The room was decorated to perfection.  Everything was absolutely exquisite.  However, she was too anxious and wary to enjoy it.  So instead of being inspired, each gorgeous detail grated on her. She reached up to tug on her hair before remembering her hair had been pulled up into an elegant twist held in place with a single silver pin. With her normal anxiety relief method unavailable, she instead shifted nervously from foot to foot while she scanned the room trying to catch sight of the rest of the Waynes, gently tightening and loosening her grip on her purse, trying not to crush Tikki.

She was so lost in her anxiety she didn't notice the dark haired man walking behind her take notice of her and stop.  He stood behind her with a nonchalance that didn’t seem to fit a man his size.  He watched her fidget and muttering to herself about “damn rich people” with a smile on his face.

“You don't seem excited to be here” he said quietly.

She turned around with wide eyes, shocked that someone had heard her.  Whatever she was expecting to see it was not what she saw in front of her.  The man towered over her.  Even in her ridiculously, dangerously high heels, Chloe insisted, her head didn’t even come up to his chin.  He was also extremely handsome, with chiseled features and the most gorgeous blue eyes she had ever seen.  Those eyes were going to be a problem.  They were clear and kind and roguish and hypnotizing.  His black hair with a shock of white was slightly tousled giving the impression of a rouge trying to look sophisticated.  Was it inappropriate to imagine running her hand through his hair and along his sharp jawline?  Yeah, probably not appropriate and likely not welcome.  Clean up your thoughts, girl!  Great, now Alya was in her head scolding her.  No, that’s not right, because that would definitely not be Alya’s advice.  

He was grinning at her with an impish look in his eyes. “What?  Not impressed with the ‘we care about whatever the point of this gala is, but we’re not hobos so let’s not skimp on the luxury for us’ décor?  Or maybe it is the illustrious, soul sucking, benefactors of Gotham that have set you on edge.”  The smile he shot her was guarded and critical. She chuckled lightly and looked away. “You have good judgement and a good reason to be suspicious.  But you made it to The event of the season, so you must have done something right… or wrong.”

She hummed and looked away.  “Have you ever had one of those days where everything went wrong and now you don't know how you got where you are or why you are there?”

“I’m familiar with the feeling,” he nodded.

“That's my life. All of it.  Every single fucking day.  This one included."

He barked out a laugh and looked at her again appraising her.  “Well aren’t you a ray of sunshine.  I think I like you.  You might just make this torture session more bearable.  See you around,” he chuckled as he walked away.

Marinette watched the man’s retreating back.  The night was already going better than she thought it would.  But the plan for the night wasn’t to find a date it was to act as a scout and keep tabs on the… enemy?  For all intents and purposes, that is what the Waynes were tonight, right?  They had information that she needed, that Paris needed, and they apparently weren’t going to part with it willingly, so they were the enemy.  No, enemy sounded too harsh she chided herself.  Opposition? Yes, they were the opposition.  That sounded much less hostile, more like a game… a game where people’s lives were on the line.  You know, just for fun, no pressure.

She found a spot against a wall she could use.  It was slightly raised but not well lit so it wouldn’t draw attention to her.  From her spot she could finally see the family. It was very thoughtful of them to group together like that.  She could see the little one, stiff and military-like posture, glowering at the people around him.  He was standing as far away from the rest of the people there as he could without actually leaving the room.  Much closer to the dancefloor, she could see the middle boy talking to a few business men. They all had fake smiles plastered on their faces as they made seemingly insignificant small talk.  She did not envy him that experience.  Between the two and to the side was the oldest son. He was chatting up some business person’s daughter, leaning in a lot closer than etiquette would dictate. Just the father then… there he was still not too far from the door talking to a dark haired woman.  He had his arm around her waist as she leaned into him. She must be the girlfriend then. Mari made a note that she should probably pay attention to where she was as well.  Fortunately, the spot she had chosen gave her a great vantage point.  Unfortunately, her observation spot wasn’t as unnoticed as she had hoped.

 ___________________________________________________________

Jason made his way over to the bar and ordered a beer.  He still hadn’t spoken to his family to let them know he was there and he definitely needed a drink before he approached them.  Why the fuck was he here again?  Fucking Batman.  

Fresh glass of beer in hand, he made his way over to his brothers, refusing to acknowledge any of the partygoers along the way.  He watched as his brothers took note of his approach and excused themselves from their conversation partners.  Dick didn’t look too happy to turn away from the latest interest, smiling at her and giving her reassurances before sending her away.  Tim looked less happy to have to turn away from the men he was talking with. He should be thanking Jason really. He was giving him an out from having to deal with them and their god awful personalities and fashion. Seriously, who told that guy that tie was okay.  Even the Riddler would think that tie was obnoxious.

“Okay, I’m here,” Jason said taking a large swig of his drink.  “How long before I can ditch this bottomless pit of misery?”

“Woah, slow down there.  You’re going to get drunk before the announcement.”  Dick cautioned him.

“Do you want me here or do you want me sober?  You’re going to have to choose one.  They’re mutually exclusive, Dickweed.”

“Come on Jaybird, we all have to be here.  None of the rest of us are getting drunk.”

“That’s just because I’m smarter than you guys are,” he said tipping his glass to Tim who had scoffed at the suggestion and took another drink.  “There is no reason we all have to be here.  We shouldn’t all have to suffer.  And officially, I’m not even a member of this hellscape of a family anymore so I really shouldn’t have to be here.”

“If The Disappointment gets to leave, so do I. Someone should be patrolling tonight instead of all of us wasting our time entertaining these harpies.  And if one more person tries to touch me on my head I’m going to break a hand.”

“Stop it!  Nobody is leaving, Damian.  We’re in this together.  And Jason, if anyone got to go home it wouldn’t be you.  You are the reason we all have to be here in the first place; so we can ALL show our support when we officially announce that you are part of this ‘hellscape of a family’ again.  So enjoy it,” he said with a cutting smile.

“Not everyone enjoys getting groped by the gold-digging, trust fund whores.  I’ve found a way to cope.  It’s called alcohol.  Now if you’ll excuse me,” he downed the drink in his hand, “my drink is empty.  I’m going to go find another.”

“At least try not to interact with anyone. We don’t want to piss anyone off tonight.  And I don’t want to have to fix your messes.”

“Way ahead of you, Replacement.”  Jason turned and walked away before Dick could reprimand him again.  He needed to get away.  He could only handle his family in small does, very small doses, miniscule amounts, and he had already surpassed that limit.  

He grabbed two more drinks off of a passing waiter’s tray and looked for the Sunshine Girl.  He scanned the room sipping the champagne, trying not to make eye contact with anyone in the room.  His size and demeanor was usually enough to keep people away but making eye contact made people think he was open to talking.  He was not.  He had no interest in making nice with Gotham’s elite.  He wanted to get this night over with, with as little pain as possible.  

He finally spotted her off to the side of the room speaking with the obnoxious tie guy.  Jason watched as the man slid his hand up the side of her leg starting to move under her skirt.  Jason started to make his way over to them until he saw her move closer to the man.  She was close enough to whisper seductively into his ear now.  Ah, not uninvited then.  Maybe he had misread her.  Well there goes his hope of this party not sucking balls.  He started to turn away but noticed a pained expression on the man’s face.  He turned back to reexamine the scene.  She was holding the man’s hand at an unnatural angle.  It was a hold he’d used a few times himself, it was discrete but extremely effective, causing intense pain with a small movement.  He knew if she moved her hand just a few more centimeters, she could easily break his wrist.

She let go with a viscous look pushing him away from her as she did.  The man shook his hand and scowled at her.  He started back toward her and Jason took off running, not pausing to apologize to the people he bumped into along the way.  Before he could get to her, she had already taken care of it. She squared her shoulders and glared at the man, making it clear that she could and would continue with her actions if he persisted.  When she moved her hand ever so slightly, just enough so he could see it and remember what she had done, the man turned away and smiled at the people who had been standing behind him as though nothing had happened.  Jason chuckled to himself watching her move away from the man. She was definitely going to make this night more bearable.

“Looks like you don’t need me around for protection. Although I did bring a drink so maybe I can earn my keep that way,” he said handing her one of the glasses in his hand.  “That was extremely impressive.  How did you lean to handle yourself like that?”  

She accepted the glass and shrugged.  “You live in Paris long enough you pick up a few things.”

“That isn’t something you just ‘pick up’. That’s experience.”

“And that is exactly what you get when you have a supervillain terrorizing your streets and thoughts for 5 years; experience. And how do you know about that move?  Rich boy secretly a vigilante?” She raised an eyebrow at him giving him a daring smile and pretending to take a drink from the glass.  She was on a mission and she didn’t know him.  She wasn’t about to actually drink anything a stranger gave her, let alone get drunk.

“You don’t grow up in Gotham without learning how to take down someone trying to cop a feel.  And what do you mean about a supervillain in Paris?” he asked taking a step closer to her, concern edging into his stare.

“It doesn’t matter.  It’s not relevant for tonight.” She said taking a step away and scanning the room again to locate the Waynes.

He looked at her for a few moments taking her in, not just her appearance but how she held herself.  She stood with confidence and nonchalance.  She wasn’t acting coy, she wasn’t baiting him to ask her more questions, she was serious.  There was some kind of supervillain running around Paris that they had no idea about.  Well that piqued his interest.  He wanted to find out more about that and just his luck, the only person around who knew about it was the gorgeous and badass Sunshine Child in front of him. Guess he’ll just have to suffer and spend more time talking to her.  The things he does for Gotham, he smirked to himself. “I’m Jason,” he said putting his hand out for her to shake.

She looked at his hand before hesitantly taking it. His hand absolutely engulfed hers. “Nice to meet you Jason,” she said looking toward the dancefloor.  She had last seen the Waynes near the dancefloor and they couldn’t have gotten far, right?  They were likely to be near it.

Misinterpreting her focus he asked, “Wanna dance?” placing down his now empty glass.

She needed a better vantage point to locate the Waynes and even if they weren’t on the dancefloor anymore, the dancefloor would be the ideal place get an unobstructed, overall view of the room.  She could see the entire room from the dancefloor.  She just had to scope it out discretely so Jason didn’t get suspicious.  “Sure,” she said smiling at him and accepting the hand he had offered her.

He guided her out onto the dancefloor.  Jason noticed a little girl standing nervously next to the dancefloor looking at a group of kids nearby.  “Hold on just a second,” he said dropping her hand to kneel down next to the little girl.  “Hey, I just wanted to say what a beautiful dress you have.  I wish you had a smile to match.  Anything wrong, kid?” he asked gently.  The little girl gave him a nervous smile.

“Thanks.  My Mom said I could pick out a dress and I chose this one.  But Mom says it looks silly.  It’s too fluffy and gets in everyone’s way.”

At that Marinette kneeled down next to her as well. “Oh.  Well, let me fill you in on a little secret.  I’m a fashion designer and I can tell you there is nothing wrong with fluffy.  You did a great job picking it out.  It is perfect for you.  I couldn’t design anything better.  I wish I looked as confident and effortlessly beautiful as you do. ”

The smile the little girl gave her was genuine this time.  “You really like it?”

“I do,” Marinette responded.  

“I do, too.  I’m not a fashion designer, but I still think you look good, kid.  And if anyone tells you they don’t like it, scr… I mean, forget them.  Who cares what they think.  A fashion designer and a delinquent think it looks amazing.  Don’t let someone else tell you what you like.” Jason added.  The little girl beamed at both of them and bounded off to join the kids with much more confidence.

Marinette watched him as he watched the kid play with her friends making raucous noise as they played, a grin on his face until he saw some parents come to reprimand their kids for being so noisy.  So, rich boy has a heart and is really protective of kids.  Well that wasn’t going to help Marinette focus solely on the mission. “That was incredibly nice of you.  That’s not advice I would have expected from someone attending a party like this.” Marinette said taking Jason’s outstretched hand again.

“Just because we’re miserable here doesn’t mean she should be, too.  Kids should be happy.  It’s ridiculous to bring a kid to a party if you aren’t going to let them be a kid. Adults in Gotham expect too much of their kids.  They treat them like props instead of kids, tools to help them achieve a goal.” He said voice getting gruff as he spoke.  He looked back at her and shook his head as if to clear his head of his thoughts.  He smiled at her instead and took her waist with his free hand to start dancing with her.

“You know, I noticed you never did give me your name.”

She looked into his eyes for a just a moment before she looked back to the dancefloor, “You know, I noticed that too.”

“Hmmm.  Secretive. No name but a fashion designer from Paris,” he said.  Marinette paled slightly refusing to look back at him.  He was paying attention to her and noticing details.  She hadn’t expected that from this crowd.  She was going to have to be more careful about what she said.  ‘Not get noticed’ played over and over in her head.  She was supposed to slip in and out with nobody remembering her.  She might have blown the mission already.  But, was she ready to walk away from those blue eyes?  Surely, talking with him couldn’t do any harm, right?  “So, did you design the dress you’re wearing?”

She was brought back to reality with a jolt.  “Yes.  Not… not my best work, but it fit the uh, occasion,” she stuttered out.

“Was the occasion to look stunning?  Because you do.”  He grinned smugly as she blushed heavily under his praise.  This was fun.  This was his new mission for the night; to see how many times he could make her blush.  “Still not going to tell me your name, huh?”

She looked back at him before dropping her eyes again.  Stupid mission.  If it were just her here for herself, she could stay here dancing with Jason and gazing into his eyes for the rest of the night, and tomorrow, and the day after for that matter.  But she wasn’t here for herself.  She was here for a reason and that reason demanded she be anonymous and keep track of the Waynes.

She scanned the floor again and finally spotted the Waynes, confirming they were all there.  Nobody had snuck off.  They really liked sticking around each other didn’t they?

“No, it takes more than a pretty line from a pretty boy to get my name” she said looking back to Jason and plastering on a fake smile. “I don’t need any rich boys remembering me after this is over.  Tomorrow I’ll go back to my real life and it will be like none of this ever happened. I can report that I came, I danced, and I even smiled a few times, then never speak of it again.”

“Friends or family forced you to come because they thought you needed some excitement in your life, Pixie Pop?”

“Something like that… Pixie Pop?”

“You won’t tell me your name and I need to call you something.  You’re little and mischievous and can handle yourself… Pixie Pop. Honestly, you’re lucky I didn’t go with Odysseus.  Also, you think I’m pretty?”  He grinned down at her.

She rolled her eyes but smiled anyway, cheeks flushing slightly.  “I think that would have made you Polyphemus, which you certainly have the size for,” she grinned up at him.  “Anyway, that’s why I’m here.  How about you?”

“Oh, my family thinks I have enough fun already. I’m here because if they have to suffer, so do I.  And all to bolster the name of the illustrious Bruce Wayne.”

Marinette examined his face as he stared toward where she last seen Bruce Wayne.  He looked annoyed and frustrated.  This was a side of Mr. Wayne she had not heard about in her research, a side that frustrated native Gothamites.  A bit more information could be helpful for her to figure out what role he played in the Grimoire information Constantine was gathering, figure out whether or not he was a threat.  “Not a fan?” she asked delicately.

He looked back at her examining her face for any malice.  “Depends on the day.”

She hummed in response.  “What can you tell me about Bruce Wayne?” she finally asked.

“Why do you want to know?” he responded suspiciously. Most people looking for more information wanted it as a weapon.  Bruce might not be his favorite person, he might actually hate him right now, but he wasn’t going to help someone take him down unless it was him.

She shrugged, “everything I’ve seen shows an exemplary record for him.  You don’t seem to be a fan though and you’ve grown up in Gotham so you would have some good insights.  So, I’m wondering what your take on him is.  What he’s done to draw your ire.”

Jason nodded slightly seeming to mull over what she said.  “He does good things.  He helps a lot of charities.  He honestly does care about the city and the people and about making their lives better. His parenting skills could use some work though.  He could show his sons that he actually cares about them as more than tools, you know, whether they live or died…” he furrowed his brows and looked away for a few seconds before he schooled his expression.  His eyes got a wicked gleam to them and he leaned towards her to whisper conspiratorially “… and I hear he’s sleeping with Batman.”

Mari looks at him surprised.  “Huh, I guess he has a type then, supermodels, superheroes…”

“Supervillains…” Jason says under her breath looking back at Bruce and his date.

“What?”

“Nothing,” he covered quickly, but the damage had already been done.  She had started thinking about Bruce’s involvement with the super community.  If he was sleeping with superheroes and super villains, that meant he was part of the same circles as Constantine… and Constantine liked dating in the super community.  Could Bruce Wayne be in the super community?  That would explain why he had information pertaining to the Grimoire.  And she might need to revisit exactly how Constantine knew Bruce Wayne.

“Are you okay?  I didn’t break you, did I?” he asked cautiously.

“Yeah, fine I could just maybe use some uh, water?” she gave an awkward smile.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, please?”  She just needed a bit of space to think.

Jason left to grab a glass of water and turned back to her.  She watched Bruce with her head crooked to the side.  He saw her finger discretely swiping to the right a few times as she stared intently at Bruce.  After a few times her finger swiped left instead and head straightened.  She looked around to the other members of the family as if she was counting, confirming something in her head.

Marinette’s eyes widened as she suddenly realized why Bruce Wayne could have information they needed and why Constantine needed her to keep an eye on the Waynes.  Shit. Shit shit shit shit. Shitshitshitshitshitshit. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.  She turned away quickly.  This could not be happening.  This. Could. Not. Be. Happening.  She did NOT help him break into the BATCAVE while she kept tabs on BATMAN.

And if Constantine was trying desperately to avoid him, like he did all his exes…That little…

Jason had no idea what happened but as he got closer to his Pixie he could hear her muttering under her breath in French.  His French was a bit rusty so even the pieces he could pick up were scarce and nonsensical.  Something about maybe “lying” and “Roast Beef” and “bat” and “shark” and “fucking”.  He couldn’t be positive about any of the words except two; “fucking” and “bat” those he was pretty familiar with.  Not to brag but he could swear like a sailor in at least 7 languages.  And “bat”, he knew that word in a few more languages for obvious reasons.

She was abruptly moving and ran right into him before she could take notice of her surroundings.  She looked at Jason with wide eyes, reexamining the man she had spent the evening speaking and dancing with.  Suddenly, everything clicking into place.  There was one more hero she hadn’t accounted for, Red Hood, who while he hid his face behind a mask, just so happened to have the same towering build as Jason. But Bruce Wayne didn’t have any more kids, right?  And if the other vigilantes were his sons, Red Hood should be too, right?  He just had the three boys and the two girls who were out of town.  That was it.  He had another son, but that son had died.  What was his name… She gasped loudly, “Oh God! You’re Jason,” she exclaimed out loud.  

“Yeah?”  He said confused.  They’d been over this before.

“You’re Jason Todd,” she said looking down and taking slow breaths.  “You’re Bruce Wayne’s son.”

He looked at her startled.  She put that together quicker than he was expecting especially since she didn’t seem to know much about the family. “For what it’s worth, I don’t feel like his son most of the time,” he tried to joke.  “Sorry for not telling you before.  I don’t like talking about being in the family, or being in the family at all, actually.” He winced looking at her wide eyes.

“I wasn’t supposed to get noticed by the Waynes. Shit!”

“Then you shouldn’t have worn that dress… or that face… or that smile, Pixie.”  He said grinning suavely.  

She examined him for a few seconds, emotions flittering across her face almost too quickly to identify them.  Confusion, bashful, flattered, hopeful, guilt, pain, melancholy.

“I have to go.” She finally spoke up.

“Wait.  What?”

“I… I have to go”

“Wait, is it… you have to go because I’m Wayne’s son?”

“No, I… shit.  Putain de bâtard.” Yep, that one he understood too.  Wait... “Me?” He asked pointing to himself.

“No, not you… Not because you’re a Wayne, well kind of because you’re a Wayne.  It’s…” she faltered for a few seconds then muttered under her breath again “Je vais tuer cette putain de mère.”

“Wait, who is the mother fucker you’re talking about? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.  I’m just going to kill a bitch when I get home.”

“Okay… Okay, first, that is a lot more swearing than I thought you were capable of and I’m extremely impressed… and turned on,” he chuckled as she rolled her eyes at him and mumbled under her breath “you should have heard what was going on in my head”.  He raised his eyebrows at her suggestion.  “Okay, you’re making it really hard not to make out with you right now.” He watched proudly as her cheeks suddenly blazed red at his comment. Another point for him tonight.

“Second, if you’re just worried about Bruce finding out you were here, it never happened.  I never saw you.  You were never here,” he assured her.  Instead of calming her she seemed more panicked, eyes darting from the door to him. This seemed like more than just not wanting to get noticed.  She was into something and didn’t want to be.  “Or, if you’re in trouble, I can help.  You just need to tell me what is going on.  You don’t seem like you would willingly work with someone out to hurt others, so whatever it is, I’m sure you aren’t willingly doing it.  If it is something bad.  I just really have no idea what is going on right now and I would like you to tell me.” He continued earnestly, looking her in her eyes to make sure she understood how deathly serious he was about it.  If she needed help, he WOULD help her.  Even if he didn’t like her, which he really did, he was going to help put that smile back on her face.

She looked at him for another few moments opening her mouth slightly to say something then seemed to think better of it and closed it again.  She narrowed her eyes and looked away scanning the room as she thought about what to say and do next.  She seemed to come to a conclusion as she turned back to him and set her feet firmly on the ground.

“I never told you why I was here, did I?” Even before he shook his head she continued.  “I’m here to keep an eye on the Waynes.  On you, apparently.  Didn’t know you were back from the dead though, so I wasn’t looking out for you. Congratulations on that, by the way, you know, on the whole not being dead thing.  That’s really amazing.  I’m glad you can be around to enjoy life and laugh and be sarcastic and look at me with those eyes and look like that in a suit… probably even better out of it.”  She muttered the last part under her breath.

“I’d love to see you out of that dress, too.” He smiled smugly at her.

She huffed out a breath, cheeks reddening again, “Yeah, not happening.  I’m burning this dress as soon as I get out of here.”

“I can help you with that, too.  I like setting fires.  Two birds, one pyrotechnic.” He preened for a moment enjoying the flirting. Wait, less flirting, more focusing back on the more important part of her earlier speech.

“Wait, why are you keeping an eye on us?” he asked apprehensively.

“So I could warn my… associate if any of you left. So he could have plenty of time to… what is the best way to say this…” she looked up to the ceiling and took a deep steadying breath thinking about the words she wanted to use.  None of this was part of the plan. “…so he could have plenty of time to evacuate your… lair? No, lair makes you sound like villains… your illicit… cavern of, actually I don’t know if it is a cavern… and it isn’t really illicit, is it?  Well, actually I guess it kind of is, but that still makes it sound like you’re a villain…your underground… no, I don’t even know if it is underground… to evacuate your… uh… secret… base of… um, operations?”

“My what?” Jason demanded now more than a little concerned. “Who are you?”

“Nobody.  Absolutely nobody of consequence. And nobody who should be here right now.”  She turned to walk away before Jason stopped her.

“No.  You don’t get to say something like that then try to slink away like nothing happened. Come on, we’re going to go talk to some people,” he said grabbing her arm a bit harder than strictly necessary and dragging her towards his brothers and Bruce.  She definitely figured out who they all were or at least who Bruce was and that they knew too, which put her in danger, and she was working with someone to break into the Batcave, which put them all in danger.  Everything about this situation was dangerous and bad and they needed to talk to the family to figure out the best next steps.

Marinette dug her heels into the ground pulling against him, a really bad idea considering how high her heels were. Instead of stopping him she stumbled into his chest allowing him the opportunity to wrap his arms around her, “I’m not going anywhere with you,” she said squirming to get out of his embrace. “This is between you guys.  I have neither the desire nor the interest to get involved in this little lover’s spat.  I have more important things to be doing right now.  Things that asshole was supposed to be doing instead of pulling practical jokes.”

“Jokes?  What do you mean jokes?  What the fuck is going on?”  He looked at her again.  She wasn’t afraid, she wasn’t gloating, she wasn’t even nervous.  She was annoyed verging on enraged.  

“Nothing you need to worry about, Red.” She threw in the moniker at him to get him to back down.  She knew how important secret identities were, and how finding out someone knew yours could throw you off your game.  She felt a bit of guilt as she used that knowledge against him but this was no longer fun.  Now this was infuriating.  John was playing games with his former lover, or current lover, whatever Bruce was to him, instead of just helping.  He was taking time she didn’t want to spend, time the people of Paris should not have to wait.  They had spent weeks planning this when he could have just walked in and asked for the information.  They had wasted so much time.

“I. Do. Not. Have. Time. For. This.  This is not a joke.  This is not some gag for you overgrown children to play at,” she said hitting her finger into his chest with each word.  “I have people in need relying on me.  I have children counting on me. Parents counting on me.  Single people, who also deserve to live just as much as everyone else, counting on me and all suffering while they wait.  I. Am. Done.  And I am leaving”

Jason listened to her shocked.  Something was happening and he had absolutely no idea what, but somehow they were involved.  He hated not knowing what was going on.  Apparently children were suffering because of all of this and he didn’t know why.  But, he was going to figure it out.  She was right.  They did not have time for this.  Whatever was going on, they were going to help.  He turned away loosening his grip on her waist to just laying his arm on her instead of encircling her.  He touched his hand to his ear to activate the com hidden inside, “Tim, can you check the security video for the uh… our base of operations?”

It appeared that Tim was giving Jason some resistance because Jason turned away even further and started yell whispering threats into the air.  He was trying to be as discrete as possible in the crowded room, which normally wouldn’t be such a concern but there was a group of dancers headed their way, just leaving the dance floor after the song ended.  Marinette took advantage of his distraction and the sudden cover to twist away from him and slip into the crowd.

Jason called after her and tried to grasp her arm but missed her.  He searched for her but the crowd was too thick, having had to bottleneck to get past the tables surrounding the dance floor.  He scanned the crowd for her twisted hair or the black dress, but couldn’t see her in the group.  She had effectively disappeared, but if she went into the crowd, she would have to come out and cross the dancefloor in order to leave.  He could just wait for her on the other side of the group and keep an eye on the dancefloor.  He moved to go around the table, but that side was just as crowded so he did the only rational, discrete thing he could in the situation, he slid across the top of the table landing on the dancefloor and waited to grab her there, but she never came out.

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

_____________________________________________________________

Marinette had a habit of catastrophizing.  She knew this.  Everyone who knew her knew this.  She thought of all of the worst case scenarios and tried to plan for them. Generally, it was a wasted effort that did little more than stress her out and annoy her teammates.  Today, however, today it paid off.  She had anticipated having to make a quick escape and once she decided it was time to go, she put her escape plan into action. Freeing herself from Jason, she pulled off her belt before even getting to the crowd.  As she entered the crowd of people, she pulled out her hair pin, letting her hair fall down.  She didn’t even have to hunch down much at all to disappear into the crowd as she weaved her way through them.  One advantage to being short.  She ran her left hand through her hair tousling it so her long raven hair cascaded around her shoulders.  With her right hand, she yanked at the cowl neckline of her dress, allowing the fabric overlay to drop forming a floor length skirt, revealing the bodice of her now red Harlow inspired dress that had been hidden underneath.  Her new dress hugged her body until it reached her hips then fell freely.  

Finally, she reached into her red purse, removed her phone, the cookie for Tikki, and Kaalki’s glasses, nodded to Tikki, turned her purse inside out revealing a now black purse with red detailing, and returned her phone, glasses, cookie, hairpin, and belt into it, leaving plenty of room for Tikki. The entire change took all of 10 seconds.  By the time she would walk out of the crowd, she would be completely unrecognizable, at least by anyone who didn’t already know her.  Unless that is, if they were looking for someone moving against the tide of people.  That would be a dead giveaway.  So instead, she pivoted and moved with the crowd instead of against it, parting with them after a few tables and moving laterally toward the exit.

Marinette made her way to the exit quickly, but not quickly enough to draw attention to herself.  She needed to get to Constantine before the “bat family”, as her research had called them, got to him.  They had reasons for keeping other superheroes out of Paris and she had no interest in having that particular awkward and slightly guilt laden (stupid gorgeous blue eyes she wanted to get lost in) conversation with them.  Especially when she was this utterly livid with Constantine, which was another reason she was rushing.  She needed to get to him so she could beat the asshole out of him. Oh, she was going to make him pay for this, and not in a way he would enjoy.  

She was angry and frustrated and guilty and grieved. She knew Jason didn’t deserve for her to snap at him like she had but she had been too frustrated to hold back and he was part of the problem.  She had been having fun with Jason.  She had been enjoying bantering with him and looking into his eyes.  She had really, really been enjoying having him look at her like she was the most interesting thing in Gotham and having him hold her closer than he had to while they danced.  And now it was gone.  She was a hero and he was a vigilante so he had to be kept at a distance.  A 3,670 mile distance to be precise, well approximate.

She was just about to cross through the exit when a voice stopped her.

“Hey,” a woman with short black hair and green eyes called out to her.  Marinette slowed down weighing the risk of just blowing her off vs the risk of stopping. She decided ignoring her might lead to the woman calling after her, which would bring unwanted attention, which she wanted to avoid.  Stopping seemed the safer answer.  As long as she didn’t look back at the gala or do anything else that might incriminate herself, she would be able to get away without any awkward conversations or fights.

“Yes” she answered with a strained smile.

“I saw that little quick change back there,” the woman responded.  Marinette’s eyes widened in panic.  Before anxiety could start going over all the worst case scenarios her mind could come up with, she was already in the midst of one of them in real life she really didn’t need to start thinking of worse things to add to it, the woman continued, nonchalantly scanning the people at the gala, “don’t worry, I’m not going to out you.  I just might have occasion to use a quick change myself from time to time, so I was hoping you might share where you got your dress.”  She shot Marinette a wicked smile.  ”Just because you’re hustling doesn’t mean you can’t look killer doing it.”

Marinette relaxed minutely and gave her a small smile, “it’s called MDC Designs.  She’s online. What’s your name so she’ll know who to look out for?”

“Thanks kitten.  I appreciate it.”  She said never looking back at Marinette.  “Selina.  Selina Kyle. I’d say nice to meet you, but we never met, did we?”

Marinette smiled to herself as she walked out the door. Maybe the night wasn’t a total loss. Hopefully, Constantine got the information they needed, she’ll get to punch his smug face as soon as she sees him, and she’ll get a new client.  Guess Adrien was right about showcasing her design after all.  He must never know.  Not such a bad night at all.

 Chapter 2

 Tag:

@fsketchart @jasonette-july-2k20

[dreadfutures]

aight let‘s talk ao3 tags again

the very nice tag wrangler I’ll be quoting from has given me permission to share their kind and thorough responses (all bolding/emphasis is mine) without identifying information. and we very nicely go through some of my own tags from my long fic Dead Pasts, Dread Futures. Many, many thanks to this wrangler for explaining so much to me.

Anyway. I present these discussions as a peacable offer of: these are many writers’ concerns, and they are valuable, and worth considering. don’t dismiss concerns about the tag limit off hand, and don’t insist that edge cases don’t matter.

tldr; at the moment, after all this discussion and back and forths and bullying, I still believe that having 75 tags, period, as the limit across ALLCharacters/Relationships/Fandoms/Additional Tags penalizes longfics. Period. If it were even a limit of 100 tags, or broken down by Tag Type, it would be a little more forgiving. For advertising and for content filtering purposes, it only helps writers and fic visibilty to be specific and thorough in tags. A limit like this just so clearly has the potential to negatively affect large fandom/large ensemble/long fics.

It feels like this decision is being very broadly based on a "for the majority" mindset, which has never been what AO3 is about, without actually physically looking at the kinds of fics it will affect. The tag system on AO3 has been able to give fic filtering and reader-judgement a nuance that no other platform has accomplished, and longfics and large ensemble fics still, I think, depend on that as both a courtesy and necessity. I saw the rough math someone did and know that almost all fics currently on AO3 are <25k or something like that, and sure, for the average oneshot, or for even a fic <100k, a tag limit that's very strict across all tag categories probably won't be felt at all. But it's clearly something that people who write certain types of fics, and take them very seriously, will feel. Like I genuinely don't want to have a million tags. I want to tag relevant content that allows potential readers to filter & include & exclude my fic as they so choose, but also, if it does show up in their search, I want to give them the information they want to be able to decide if they want to read my fic or not. I don't want to have to put all my content warnings into a giant summary, or into a giant author's note that grows and grows. The tags have been a very helpful way of accomplishing those. Being able to cut down on parallel/synned tags is great, but it still seems like longfics that deal with multiple fandom entries, large casts, and require content warnings will butt up against that limit very quickly.

tag limit discussions:

- long fic writers adding tags as they go

- writers of franchises with many installments and ensemble casts

- writers with extensive content warnings

- use of tags to clarify a filtered tag

- use of tags to demonstrate how content is handled

off the bat - stop being jerks

look, I know objectively fics don’t need to be tagged at all. I lived in the wild west, too, when “lemon” meant anything from the merest mention of arousal to an explicit vanilla sex scene to all out dead dove craziness. a large part of me still is of the opinion that readers should just read shit, and if they decide they don’t like it, just dip. but that’s not what we’re about here. tagging is a kindness that we voluntarily undertake, and it’s also a form of advertising.

tags are useful for their specificity, for filtering and exclusion purposes

(that’s one of the cruxes of the arguments both pro-shippers and antis make: you can filter things! But you can only filter things if they’re tagged.)

I also understand that a few asshole writers have ruined this for all of us by purposefully adding so many tags it slows down the site and makes pages fail to load and hides other fics because the tags take up 10 pages. i also am frustrated with kinkmemers who just have prompt fill fic dumping grounds that span multiple unrelated fandoms and are impossible to navigate.

...the answer is not to suggest to writers that we put all our content warnings and pairings and etc. in our summaries, or our A/Ns, or to insert a first chapter that is a placeholder summary/tags page/world state. tags are useful for their specificity, for filtering and exclusion purposes.

I also have been dealing with people being murderously angry, and super self-righteous and targeting and mean about my own tags, and tags in general. people who are anti-tag are being giant fucking dicks about it. like get over yourselves and let’s just talk about a website function lol. tags are useful for their specificity, for filtering and exclusion purposes.

THE ANSWER IS NOT TO GET RID OF TAGS.

Alright, so now that we’ve gotten that flippin’ straw argument aside.

The next thing anyone has been doing is going to my page and critiquing my tags. Let’s address redundant tags.

(the wrangler has done this nicely! no ridicule necessary!)

using my fic as an example:

If you tag your fic Female Lavellan/Solas (only), it will show up in the following searches: Inqusitor/Solas, Female Inquisitor/Solas, Lavellan/Solas, Female Lavellan/Solas.  If you tag your fic Inquisitor/Solas (only), it will show up only in the Inquisitor/Solas search and in none of the others.  If you tag with the most specific version, it will show up in the more general versions, but not the other way around. So there's no real reason to tag with the more general tags.

Though I will point out that if you don't use the canonical tag      and tag your character or relationship with a custom name it will      be synned to the nongendered version, because at some point the DA      wranglers decided that they didn't want to make gender      assumptions.  So "Annabelle Lavellan" will be synned to "Lavellan      (Dragon Age)" rather than "Female Lavellan (Dragon Age)", and      someone searching for works with specifically "Female Lavellan"      won't see it.

Response: In the fanfic writers server I'm in, we've talked about how tags work and are supposed to work extensively in the past.  There's just always been a lot of confusion, which I think has been added to when people go and try to double-check for themselves and find instances where this treeing/synning is broken. Someone put out this guide (also here) for AO3 meta text this year, which has been referred to by multiple people in the server, and it says:

What if you wrote a fic for something where there's a movie based on a book, but the movie's really different, and you've used both things that are only in the movie and things that are only in the book? In that case you either tag your fic as both the movie and the book, or see if the fandom has an “all media types” tag and use that instead of the separate tags. If the fandom doesn't have an “all media types” tag yet, you can make one! Just type it in.

“All media types” fandom tags are also useful for cases where there are lots of inter-related series, like Star Wars; there are several tellings of the story in different media but they're interchangeable or overlap significantly, like The Witcher; or the fandom has about a zillion different versions so it's very hard, even impossible, to say which ones your fic does and doesn't fit, like Batman. Use your best judgement as to whether you need to include a more specific fandom tag such as “Batman (Movies 1989-1997)” alongside the “all media types” fandom tag, but try to avoid including very many. The point of the “all media types” tag is to let you leave off the specific tags for every version.

Which I believe is in direct contradiction to guidance to use the most specific tags, so that's definitely one source of confusion. The most recent ao3 meta text guide (https://archiveofourown.org/wrangling_guidelines/2 I think this one) doesn't present itself in a way that makes this clear for writers tagging their own works. The way authors usually go about tagging things (and what's in the FAQ) is to start typing into one of the boxes and look for what populates the drop down, which doesn't lend itself to knowing that there are trees, or knowing what tags are interrelated (it seems like a whole grab bag of tags get suggested, some in-fandom and some outside of fandom, some canon/parent/meta and some children/random freeform, in just about any field you start typing in).

I'm not sure what can really be done about this. Many of us have turned to ao3-comment-of-the-day and their posts about using Tags, and various sources on google, and have clearly come up with a whole load of conflicting advice.

Fundamentally, finding parent/meta tags for a tag as you’re tagging a fic is NOT clear to writers. The fact that a nested and a meta tag can both be suggested one after the other when filling in tags largely contributes to redundant tags.

Writing for Multiple Fandom Entries

Here’s what a tag wrangler had to say about my fandoms:

As with the relationship tree, you can look at the fandom tree  here:      https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Dragon%20Age%20-%20All%20Media%20Types  and see how the fandom tags are related. Going back to your story Rogasha'ghi'lan as an example, it's tagged with Dragon Age: Inquisition, Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: The Last Court.  But as I said, you only need to tag with the lowest relevant level(s) on the tree in order for your fic to show up under the higher levels.  So if you tag with      Dragon Age: Inquisition and Dragon Age: The Last Court, it will show up not just under those categories, but also under Dragon Age (Video Games) and Dragon Age - All Media Types.  And of course because you've tagged with the specific, if someone searches under, say, Dragon Age (Video Games), but doesn't want Inquisition or Last Court fic, they can use the exclude filter to show only the earlier games.

(So that's two more tags you can remove with no effect on searchability!)

In my (but not only my) own case, I am indeed writing for Origins, DA2, Inquisition, and Last Court extensively within the same fic, so I should be tagging for all of those, specifically, still. In order to make sure my fic is seen by the correct fans, I need multiple specific tags.

Longfic Tag Bloat (adding tags as you write a fic)

And like many other longfic writers, even if I narrow down my character tags only to those with dedicated character arcs longer than 5 chapters, I still have Loads & Loads of Characters (including Dalish from the Chargers!).

A lot of longfic writers I know add characters, relationships, and content warnings as they go along.

At 170 chapters/580k words, Dead Pasts had a ton of important relationships (for example, like Vivienne & Lavellan), and as a story it's nowhere near done. I found myself planning an arc from 171 onward that would introduce a very important relationship (Felassan & Lavellan). This is how longfics end up with so many, many, many character tags and relationship tags, which is another major criticism people seem to have about "people who abuse tags."

A solution that people propose online is "split your fic." Which is actually what I ended up doing...but the old relationships and fandoms from DPDF still apply to Rogasha'ghi'lan, so Rogasha'ghi'lan will have the same number and more tags than DPDF.

If I hadn't split the fic, I would have just kept adding tags to Dead Pasts...and still had the same problem of continually adding tags. They're not superfluous tags: someone who wants to see a plot that is deeply influenced by Vivienne & Lavellan will find that in my fic; someone who is looking to see a major Felassan & Lavellan friendship grow and drive plot will also find that in my fic.

My fic is long; there are other fics that are longer, or are going to be longer, with casts that are just as large or larger, with many relationships, and that's not even talking about content warnings.

Polycule / Relationship Tags

"Tagging a polycule like Iron Bull/Dorian/Lavellan requires four      tags: Bull/Dorian/Lavellan, Bull/Dorian, Bull/Lavellan,      Lavellan/Dorian"

This assumes that people who like Lavellan/Dorian will want to read Iron Bull/Dorian/Lavellan, which is often not the case.  If your story Is Iron Bull/Dorian/Lavellan, tag it that way!  It doesn't make any sense to me to tag with the pairs as well unless the story would be of interest to people who read for that pair, or unless that pair relationship is a big step in the story (like, if you have established Lavellan/Dorian, and then they bring in Bull, you might tag for both that pair and the trio). I mean, you can tag how you like, there's no requirement that tags correspond to content. But for me, personally, if I search on Dagna/Lace Harding (I am weak for dwarf women!) I do not want to get a Dagna/Lace Harding/Sera fic.

My personal tastes don't include poly fics, but several writers I know who write poly fics are adamant that: tons of readers will not know of the possibility of the poly fic until it shows up in a search result, and the individual relationships often are significant to the fics, especially in fics that are not oneshots. For example, a great number of "fav fics" are stumbled-across! We aren't interested in the Sera/Dagna/Lace polycule ourselves, but someone might not have considered it, found it, and said, "Hey! That's my new favorite." But if polycules are segregated and only searchable by the polycule itself, alas, what's the option for visibility at all if not tagging it as Lace/Dagna in addition?

Additional Tags

Knowing when something is a "character" and when something is "additional"

Knowing that "Warrior Lavellan" (or the [Name] Mahariel) would be more useful in an Additional Tag vs. a Character Tag is also something I'm not sure how we're supposed to know? Like, I'm glad to know it now, but it's definitely not at all obvious without you telling me why it would be more useful in Additional vs in Character. Especially when to me: Warrior Lavellan is a character, and the fact that it populated the Character tag for me says that it's a Character. Because like I said, the guidance has been: start typing, and if it appears in the drop down, use it. Or, for example, my friend has the Well of Sorrows personified as a Character. Like an actual character. Does that have to go under Additional Tags, or as a Character? How do I know?

Additional tags as tone/content indicators

A lot of writers / readers have approached the Additional Tags as a surface-level overview of understanding how an author is approaching many topics concerned in the fic. Like, Vivienne is a character in my fic, but specifically I am Vivienne-positive, which I feel is important to denote because she's important to my fic, and she's a divisive character. Mood/tone/theme indicators like "Pro-Vivienne" or "we are Vivienne-positive in this house" (or like Male-Female Friendship, or "Expansive Lore" vs "Lore - Freeform" which denote different things to me) in tags (which in the comments section on the ao3 blog post get derided as "chatty tags") are still important to me, though they're useless or far less likely to be used for filtering. (I had the thesis of the conflict of my fic: “empathy is the enemy of free will” “but hope is a choice” as “chatty tags,” among some that were more mundane but important: “sera shows up late in fic”)

More seriously, there are fics that have content warning tags for filtering purposes but also clarify those content warnings to give context to readers and allow them to make a decision whether or not the content actually fits their preferences, ie, one that specifies domestic abuse as a tag (which would be in the Additional Tags) for filtering purposes but also specifies "domestic abuse not present in x relationship" (which would also be in the Additional Tags, but is useless for filtering purposes, but is immensely helpful and demonstrably used by readers to decide if they're going to even bother reading the author's note of that fic).

People are also nervous that not being able to thoroughly tag content warnings is going to end up with unhappy readers amid all the purity culture flaming that's going on lately.

Like, personally I err on the side of "suck it up, reader, and just read and find out," for a lot of things (not talking about content warnings, but talking about mood/tone additional tags), but also, given that there is already a venue here to let readers know what they're in for...taking that away sucks.

I hate a giant fic summary as much as people hate 10 pages of tags, but at least one can hide tags in their preferences, and likewise the thought of starting a fic up front with a giant author's note that gets continually updated with content warnings also isn't super appealing. Leading with a giant author's note that lays out: this is my world state and this is my character's spec and this is my character's background so you know how I'm going to approach this and these are all of the content warnings for the fic as a whole, just feels like getting into "My Immortal" territory. There's definitely a balance to be had between the art of writing a summary, what to include in an author's note, and what to include in tags, but this still seems like it's going to be fairly limiting for writers in these large franchises, especially for longfics that span a lot of topics.

It feels like this decision is being very broadly based on a "for the majority" mindset, which has never been what AO3 is about, without actually physically looking at the kinds of fics it will affect. The tag system on AO3 has been able to give fic filtering and reader-judgement a nuance that no other platform has accomplished, and longfics and large ensemble fics still, I think, depend on that as both a courtesy and necessity. I saw the rough math someone did and know that almost all fics currently on AO3 are <25k or something like that, and sure, for the average oneshot, or for even a fic <100k, a tag limit that's very strict across all tag categories probably won't be felt at all. But it's clearly something that people who write certain types of fics, and take them very seriously, will feel.

Like I genuinely don't want to have a million tags. I want to tag relevant content that allows potential readers to filter & include & exclude my fic as they so choose, but also, if it does show up in their search, I want to give them the information they want to be able to decide if they want to read my fic or not. I don't want to have to put all my content warnings into a giant summary, or into a giant author's note that grows and grows. The tags have been a very helpful way of accomplishing those. Being able to cut down on parallel/synned tags is great, but it still seems like longfics that deal with multiple fandom entries, large casts, and require content warnings will butt up against that limit very quickly.

[927roses-and-stuff]

Miracles in Gotham: Chapter 3: Unwelcome Discoveries (Part 1)

Hey, guys! This fic is inspired by @ozmav mav’s Maribat AU. Shoutout to @mystery-5-5  for brainstorming ideas with me for this fic. 

Midterms have got me acting up. Despite the quarantine, I literally wasn’t motivated to write until the moment I could use writing to procrastinate. Absolutely brilliant logic. Truly. Thank you guys so much for the wait and I hope you enjoy this chapter.  

If you want to see more, follow: #miraclesingotham or ask to be added to the tag list.

P.S. For the sake of continuity, I’m going to ignore the Heroes United thing because that episode was basically a fanfic of the fanfic and as much as I loved the animation and the new characters...I’ve seen better plots and explanations for a lot of the similar problems in the Maribat fandom. Also Sparrow is probably a reference to Batman, anyways. Also, canon has just gone out the window...I guess...whoops. 

P.P.S. Swearing tw, death tw. 

Please remember this is rated M for a reason. Also, it is my headcanon that not everyone who dies during the akuma attacks come back. Of course, it’s not mentioned in a children’s show, but I’ve always seen the Miraculous Cure as a cure for physical, non-living objects as they’re easier to fix, and lives take a lot more effort and energy from the user to revive. And since Marinette is a child, there’s not going to be a lot of energy to spare.

Tag list: @northernbluetongue @spicybelladonna @my-name-is-michell @legendaryneckjudgestudent @lokiifriggasonn @zerotosiki

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To the members of the Justice League…

I am writing to you as Chat Noir, superhero of Paris and holder of the Black Cat Miraculous of Destruction, and partner to Ladybug, the official Guardian and the holder of the Ladybug Miraculous of Creation. I come to you with a plea similar to ones that we have sent you a year ago. The magical terrorist, Hawkmoth, is still at large here in Paris, France. If you are not aware of who he is, Hawkmoth is a domestic terrorist in Paris who relies on the power of the Butterfly Miraculous to create a physical and amplified manifestation of a person’s negative emotions, using the victim as a host, using magical butterflies as his form of transmission. These are called akumas. The akuma allows Hakwmoth to essentially get inside the mind of  his victims and manipulate and amplify their emotions.  We have been fortunate enough to have a failsafe in Ladybug, who can repair any physical damages, and even bring back lives, from these attacks. However, both Ladybug and I have reached our wits’ ends with no lead to Hawkmoth’s true identity. The people of Paris are suffering both from emotional trauma and the physical trauma of being subjugated, manipulated, experiencing bouts of amnesia, and even resurrecting multiple times. Hawkmoth has even taken to exclusively targeting a middle-school class at College Francois-Dupont.

Ladybug and I are aware of the risks superhero presence may bring since we will not survive a fight if any more experienced superheroes such as yourselves are akumatized. However, I feel that we have no other choice. Our Master has recently been put out of commission and the rest of our comrades have had their identities compromised. Ladybug is now the Guardian of the rest of the Miraculous. And although she will not approve of my plea, even your  advice or insight will be of use to us.

Please consider our plight and contact us as soon as you can.

Chat Noir 

Bruce Wayne was not a perfect man, he will admit. However, he did pride himself on his sense of logic and adaptability to most situations, as long as they stayed within the mortal realms of believability that is. Magic, however, or anything pertaining to the supernatural was out of his forte; in fact, he often liked to pretend it did not exist despite having acquaintances and enemies whose entire lives revolved around it. There was a reason he did not tolerate the  prolonged presence of meta-humans in Gotham, after all. 

He re-read through the email once, twice, again and again, desperately wishing that it had not been his shift to look through the messages that the Justice League received on a daily basis. Why couldn’t it have been Superman or Wonder Woman? Or better yet, Dr. Fate or Zatanna, never mind the fact that the latter was technically retired. Any of them would’ve made sense of this gibberish that was laid out in front of him. 

Initially, he thought it had been a coded message. It made perfect sense, in his opinion. The only concrete fact he could dissect out of this nonsense was the presence of a domestic terrorist and how they were targeting some middle school students for whatever reason. His mind recalled  the recent conversation he had with André Bourgeois yesterday. Even he had mentioned a domestic terrorist going after his daughter’s class, which was why he reached out to Bruce, since Bruce would be the most fitted to protect them with his resources, despite Gotham being the crime capital of the world. He nodded to himself; the facts were consistent then. There was a terrorist and middle school students were the targets. 

On one of the other screen monitors, he had pulled up records of College Francois Dupont School for a background check using a VPN to connect to French service networks. Both the email from this Chat Noir (Selina would get a kick out of that) and André failed to mention the terrorist’s intentions with these kids. However, looking through the different classes, there had been a special note besides Mme. Bustier’s class that stated:

“High vulnerability to akumas.”

This was where Bruce was once again stumped. Of course, he really couldn’t deny the existence of magic, but accepting that meant accepting that the terrorist used magical butterflies as his form of attack. Bruce wasn’t a qualified psychologist or any sort of specialist, but surely magical butterflies could not give you emotional trauma, mind-control, or even as Chat Noir had implied, a means to murder. 

Bruce scanned through Mme. Bustier’s class to look for anything that might be different from other classes. If he recalled correctly, this was the same class that André’s kid was in. He took note of the name, Chloé Bourgeois, and other notable names such as Adrien Agreste (who’s father was a fashion mogul and a model in his own right), Lila Rossi (a diplomat’s daughter), Max Kanté (a genius, and he noted to himself to see if that held true when the class was under his supervision), Marinette Dupain-Cheng (the class president and the designer of a recent rock album according to Jason who had obsessed over the cover for a few weeks before Alfred confiscated it), and Alya Césaire (an aspiring journalist who ran a blog called the Ladyblog). 

Okay, he rationalized. While not all of these kids were significant, some, like the Mayor’s own daughter, would be prime targets for a terrorist, so that made some sort of sense in Bruce’s mind. 

He sighed again, wishing that he had a cup of coffee or an energy drink with him at the moment. Unfortunately, Tim’s recent addiction meant no one could have it. Bruce scoffed underneath his breath. Alfred had really weird rules when it came to show “family support.” Tim was a grown man who should suffer his own consequences. Alas, no one argues with Alfred lest they risked his wrath. 

Bruce hovered over the link under Mlle. Césaire’s file, the Ladyblog. Perhaps it would give him some answers. 

As a bright ladybug designed website popped up, Bruce realized he might have been so wrong. 

He scrolled through the website thoroughly from the latest posts to the earliest. He noticed a concerning trend where the later blog posts centered more around one of Césaire’s classmates, Lila Rossi, and shaky videos of a red and black spotted figurem and a black cat figure fleeing the scene, or fighting some sort of abomination that Bruce did not even attempt to understand. In one video it was the two heroes against a flock of pigeons, or a gigantic baby, or whatever else. Bruce had half a mind to dismiss the entire blog as based on falsities, however one of the videos caught his eye. 

It was a video titled: “Syren: Paris Going Underwater!!” 

That was concerning, considering a flooded Paris would’ve featured on international news, not just on an amateur blog by a middle schooler. Fortunately for him, the video quality was clearer, allowing him to watch as the camera recorded the scene of that day. 

Bruce jolted awake and snapped to attention when he realized it was being filmed on a rooftop, and that the water levels were still rising as the video progressed. From what the camera captured, there were only a handful of people on each rooftop; not even making up a fifth of the Parisian population in total. 

What the fuck?

Then, as the video concluded, gigantic swarms of red and white bugs (ladybugs?) filled the camera’s frame and when it disappeared, everything was back to what he presumed was normal. The video then faded to black, posting statistics that chilled Bruce to the fucking bone. 

“Death count: 1.528 million Parisians

Resurrection count: 1.51 million Parisians

Injured count: 10 000 Parisians

Permanent death count: 18 000 Parisians

In honour of the Parisians who were not revived and were injured during the attack, the Ladyblog, offers our condolences, and will help in any way we can online and offline.  The akuma victim, as always, will remain anonymous for safety purposes.  Links to help organizations and donation funds to the peoples and families affected will be posted below. Additional links will be posted for available online mental health services.”

And, if Chat Noir was to be believed, some people had died multiple times. 

After making sure the video was not doctored in any way (though that would be cruel to assume about a kid’s blog), Bruce sent Chat Noir’s email (along with the earlier videos from both heroes and an email from Marinette Dupain-Cheng that he had found) and all of the links he had amassed to his own computer in the Bat Cave before closing all the tabs on the monitors. Swerving around, he stormed to the Batmobile, eyebrows furrowed in solemnity. 

Magic or not, whatever terrorist was plaguing Paris had a pretty damn high casualty count, and the only people that were stopping him were this Ladybug and Chat Noir people, who did not seem to be properly equipped (the Ladybug heroine was using a yoyo, for fuck’s sake) to deal with someone of this power. Not to mention, Bruce winced, their mentor  was “out of commission” whatever that meant, with their peers being compromised, so they probably had no outside help.

And it seems, Bruce’s features darkened into a scowl, his dear friend André Bourgeois had a lot of explaining to do. Police department has it handled, his ass. 

In the meantime, he was going to make damn sure the class under his care would have a relaxing reprieve even if he had to lock up every villain in Arkham Asylum himself. 

________________________________________________________________

Dear Diary, 

The talk with Chat was a bust. I know he thinks I don’t trust him, but I wish he knew how much I’m trying to, but it’s not as simple as he makes it out to be...right?  And of course I trust him with my life, but as the Guardian, I can’t just make impulsive decisions like going to other superheroes, especially when there’s no guarantee they would help us, or can even be trusted in the first place! And I can’t just reveal our identities to each other either. It would put Chat and the rest of the Miraculous at risk. And I really don’t want a repeat of Chat Blanc…

That future will never happen on my watch. I forbid it. 

Speaking of other superheroes, I think there might be someone though, who could help us, even a little bit. 

Marianne. 

She wasn’t a Guardian, but she was a Ladybug user for a while and was really close to Master Fu. She must know something. She’s in London so she might not be available but...

I’ll check up on her today after class! If she has any helpful advice, I’ll be sure to share it with Chat too. 

Gotta go!

Bisoux, 

Marinette

Scrambling to get ready, Marinette fumbled with her pigtails and shoulder bag simultaneously, trying to make sure that her pigtails were just right. Tikki zoomed around, helping her get ready by shoving stray pens and pencils into her pockets. When they were done, Marinette rushed downstairs, swiping one of the freshly-made quiche along the way. Just before she exited the store, she turned back to give her Maman and Papa a smooch. Hastily, she then left the bakery, the bakery’s bell ringing behind her as she sprinted to school. 

It was a mystery for most people, but despite living less than five minutes away from the school, Marinette was always late. Marinette liked to blame her Ladybug duties when Tikki asked, but she knew better. She had the habit of being late since before she knew the Miraculous existed. 

To be fair though, Marinette usually slept in because she was exhausted from schoolwork, designing,

and Ladybug duties. Was it her fault that Hawkmoth liked making 3 AM akumas? Was it her fault that coffee- for all the espresso and sugar she dumped into it, and despite all those hipster blogs saying otherwise- did nothing to help her stay awake? Of course not. If anything she was a victim here; a victim of late night akumas and faulty biology. 

Fortunately for her (and her quiche), she was actually earlier today than usual. She could see students milling around the courtyard behind the school. Some sat with their friend groups while others huddled to catch up on the homework from the night before. 

Unfortunately, one of those groups was Lila and her friends. Lila sat on one of the picnic tables, talking about whatever grand adventure she supposedly went on or whichever famous celebrity she supposedly saved from a rare type of cancer or something while her friends sat around her, captivated with every word. Marinette rolled her eyes. It was too early for this. 

She steered away from them towards the other side of the yard, where she could see Alya and Nino cuddling while finishing their homework. She glanced back at Lila, who waved at the couple before going back to whatever story she was regaling to her loving audience. It was probably because Alya and Nino hadn’t seen Lila greet them in the first place, but Marinette couldn’t help feeling a bit happy that they didn’t return her greeting. 

“Morning, guys!” She greeted as she approached their table, sitting on the other side. 

Alya looked up first. “Hey! You woke up early today,” she teased, giving her shoulder a friendly nudge.

“Heh, guess it’s my lucky day today,” she said. As she sat down, she began eating the quiche she had swiped earlier. “Well, almost, anyway.”

Alya rolled her eyes and smirked. “You live in front of the school. It’s your own damn fault at this point.” 

Nino, who had been pouring over a worksheet that was due today, finally looked up. Upon seeing Marinette, he smiled. “Hey, dude. You’re actually early!” 

At Marinette’s exasperated groan, both Alya and Nino fell into giggles, Marinette shortly following along. 

“Keep that up, and I’m not gonna let you guys eat at my place for lunch,” she teased, wagging a finger at them. 

Alya wagged her own finger, engaging in a finger sword fight. “As if your mom would ever let us starve!” 

Marinette laughed, as she wrapped her finger around Alya’s and lightly slammed it onto the table, declaring her victory. 

“Okay, okay, you got me.” Marinette went back to eating her quiche, devouring it before it got too cold. For once, she was in a pretty good mood. 

“Hey, Alya, Nino,”

And of course, she just had  to jinx it. 

Marinette didn’t even try to join in the conversation to acknowledge Lila’s presence. If Lila wanted to talk to her, she needed to stop lying about everything; and with her supposed “lying disease,” that wasn’t happening anytime soon. She only wished Adrien was here so someone could sympathize with her. 

“Oh, hey Lila,” Alya greeted, having gained her hand back and waved. “Ignore Nino here. He forgot about Mendeleiv’s worksheet due today.” 

“Oh, I see.” Lila said. “Well, you know, Nino. If you ever need help with science, one of my cousins actually won a Noble Peace Prize for his contributions in molecular chemistry.” 

Nino, to his credit, only muttered an “uh huh” before turning the worksheet over and frantically scribbling all over it. Marinette briefly wondered if Nino understood what he was writing down- or if he cared. 

Alya perked up. “Wow, that’s amazing Lila! What did your cousin do?”

Lila smiled bashfully, and looked away, waving her hand. “Oh, you know, it was the discovery of some man-made element.” Marinette had to give Lila credit- she knew how to fake her blushes really well. “I’m nowhere near as smart as my cousin, you know? All the scientific words get me so confused!” 

Marinette buried her head in her arms. Did she need to be here for this? She could just slip away? Glancing at Lila, who caught her eyes, she decided against it. Like hell she was letting Lila take away her time with her  friends. 

Alya laughed good-naturedly. “Oh, I understand completely. English is so much more of my forté, you know?” 

“Yeah I totally get what you mean.” Lila stopped laughing as her gaze landed on Marinette. Only she seemed to notice the glare she gave her.  “Oh, hi, Marinette. Glad to see you’re early today.” 

“Yeah,” she deadpanned. “Hi.” With a fake smile, she robotically waved at her. 

“Well, anyways I got to go. See you later Alya.”  Lila said, waving her fingers before finally walking away. Marinette exhaled. Thank kwami. She may have been less obnoxious today but that was probably because of Alya’s presence. 

Speaking of, the said girl turned towards her. “You could be nicer towards her.” 

“She almost got me expelled.” Marinette had had this conversation with Alya many times before. At this point, her responses came like clockwork. She contemplated telling Alya’s threat back in Lila’s first day, but she really wasn’t ready for the backlash if Alya accused her  of lying. 

“Well,” Alya stuttered. “It was because she has an illness that makes her lie uncontrollably.” 

Marinette was pretty sure there was no such illness but at this point, Lila had somehow convinced everyone it was an actual illness. That, or no one wanted to point out the obvious lie, including administration. Which would be pretty negligent of the school admin so she hoped not. 

“Alya, if it was just an illness that makes her tell lies, pray tell, who put the test answers in my bag and the necklace in my locker?” she asked. 

“Maybe, well,” Alya tried coming up with an answer but failed, thereby changing the subjects. “Look, both of you are my friends, and I don’t want to get in between the two of you.” 

Marinette sighed. “Yeah, yeah.” She picked up the discarded quiche container and her bag. “I gotta go to class and see if Mme. Bustier needs help.” 

Alya frowned. “Marinette, wait.” 

“It’s okay, really.” Marinette assured her, before walking away. When she was climbing up the steps to the entrance, she sighed heavily. She didn’t really understand Alya’s logic sometimes. If she knew about Lila’s supposed lying disease, why did she put Lila’s trash on the Ladyblog? If Alya knew Lila’s lies had led to Marinette’s initial expulsion, why still defend her? Marinette shook the thoughts away, not wanting to get into that impeding headache. Lila Rossi was never worth her time. 

When she reached the entrance, Lila was leaning against the doors, her arms crossed. Her olive green eyes were glaring right at her. 

“Dupain-Cheng.” 

“Rossi.” 

Lila strutted up to her, getting uncomfortably close to her face. “I told you what would happen if you didn’t play along.” 

Marinette stared back, unimpressed. She really had more pressing issues than this weird power play Lila wanted to play. Leaning back and stepping to the side, she said, “I already told you I’m not scared of you, Lila.” 

Marinette didn’t spare her another glance. In some ways, she pitied Lila. What kind of life did you have that you were so desperate for attention you lied about everything, and tried to get rid of anyone else who called you out? 

She really hoped Alya would soon see sense. Adrien had once told her to take the high road, and honestly? Sometimes, it felt good to not let Lila’s lies get under her skin. 

Then again, when did Lila ever go down so simply? 

[davidmann95]

Today's comics?

An unusual week: while I got plenty of stuff, over half of it was non-Big Two. Would have been even more if not for the tpb for Bang! not showing up at my LCS, I’ve heard good things about that; hopefully soon.

Dark Nights: Death Metal #5: I’m still largely enjoying this, but it’s weird that after a prior event and a run leading into this that perfectly balanced pure comics bullshit lore and wild comics bullshit fun, it’s the absurd maximalist finale with the Chainsaw of Truth and an evil Darkseid arm and a zombie army commanded by Batman in a trenchcoat that it goes all the way into Lore as the heart of the thing.

Batman #103: I’m really enjoying the hell out of Ghost-Maker, the idea of the 90s globe-trotting uncompromising ass-kicker superhero with all the resources, guns, katanas, smooth self-assurance backed up by ruthless competence, and badass one-liners contemporized, made as cool as you always wanted it to be, and taken to its horrific logical conclusion. Also his name is Ghost-Maker because he kills people and that’s how ghosts work, never gonna get over that. I would for real read an ongoing about this dude, or at least legit hope somebody takes some inspiration from his new model of the template.

Catwoman #27: A lot of fun! The logistics were more than I could fully follow on a casual read, but bit-by-bit this does feel like it’s turning the Brubaker paradigm into something uniquely its own.

Rorschach #2: I very much liked it. I wonder if the stuff with how it played with time visually might have been influenced by Pax Americana, and I cracked up at the bit you’d assume I cracked up at. Again, “I liked it/didn’t like it” and maybe one or two comments are all you’re getting out of me with this one.

Ice Cream Man #21: Great as usual, but I can’t say I grasped the purpose of the riff.

Stillwater #3: This feels like it’s tending back up towards what I really dug about the first issue.

We Live #2: Didn’t quite measure up to the first issue - there’s a storytelling choice here that wasn’t entirely clear at first and left me confused for the back half of the issue, I needed to reread it to get it - but I’m still quite pleasantly surprised by this one and would recommend it even if you’re tired of the post-apocalypse.

DIE #15: I assume either next arc is the end or it completely changes up after #20, given the countdown on the back (and of course how that matches up with the physical die). Totally lost, still loving it, glad I have time to reread it and make sense of things.

Once & Future #13: Tidily answered a question I’ve had for awhile, and as much as I’ve moaned that while this is good it hasn’t been fully clicking with me, that opening was an all-timer.

Die! Die! Die! #13: Still an extremely dumb hoot.

Commanders in Crisis #2: Once again reviewed it for AIPT! And also once again would recommend checking out the site’s exclusive ‘interviews’ with the members of the team courtesy of Ritesh Babu and Orlando, this month’s being with Sawbones.

Marvels Snapshots: Avengers: Aside from the Chaykin Spider-Man one I skipped, this was the first one to leave me ‘meh’. I’d say pass.

The Immortal Hulk #40: Some of the more recent forays into more traditional superheroic territory in here - while still great - haven’t hit me as hard as its pure horror, but this is as Marvel-ass comics as the book’s gotten thus far and it’s a total blast. And among the volumes that will be dedicated to this book when it’s over, some of that writing better be dedicated to how hard each and every issue’s title fucks month in and month out, because damn.

[delusionland]

jason write-up:

jason loves cask of amontillado memes, and has a burner twitter but the only things he retweets are Every Meme off the sparknotes twitter, and donation posts that he’s qrts and @ s bruce wayne on

jason todd is actually a very boring person that likes simple things that he considers both classy & orderly & organized. he likes chamomille tea, and the scent of old books, the smell of cardboard boxes&plastic when something brand new has been delivered---but doesn’t collect anything bc of paranoia& is overly clean. his aparment is sparse & chrome.

he’s learning russian in his spare time, mostly over casette tapes which he listens to to get to bed at night.

he listens to a lot of true crime & history & philosophy podcasts, but it’s mostly just to drown out his own negative thinking and the fact that he doesn’t really talk to anybody day-to-day except for himself. (he talks to himself, out loud, a lot though, helps him remember he’s not ACTUALLY dead). he’s a member of an exclusive club of people who have actually sat there and agonized over sending an exquisitely&politely worded and thoughtful question to a podcaster in the hopes that they will answer it privately, fantasized about sending it and what the reprocrussions of sending it would be, and then, decided not to send it bc the podcaster is probably too smart & busy.

jason todd’s politics may have been considered radical in the 00s, but when jason actually says things out loud, most leftists now just think, ‘well yeah, duh. no more corrupt cops, rapists, pedophiles or abusers.’ his interest in his own justice-through-violence is now kind of normalized, and seems properly decent and logical compared to batman’s which seems to have been spinning in circles for the last thirty years. 

he doesn’t really have an active social life, and is desperately vying for his father’s approval thru batman incorporated. he pretends not to want the rest of the batfam’s approval as well since they can all see right through him (same trauma / i have trauma because of you, idiot!). but they all see why he’s still in gotham, hasn’t killed the joker, and hasn’t formed a real life of his own, and the reason rhymes with baddy issues.

jason has been involved with various teams over the years thru bruce’s influence---and i’m welcome to establishing relationships within that including with the outlaws tho i dont really like kori’s characterization within it. but mostly he spends a LOT of time alone hunting down bad guys in gotham.

he’s actually more confident interacting with villains than heroes---with villains, he feels like he’s more on even playing field and can do whatever he wants, puts on a show. even tho bruce says he can’t kill anyone mentally ill which is kind of an underpinning of ‘leave my PEERS in COSTUMED CRAZINESS to me and stick to non-suited perps,’ jason honestly still considers himself a rogue even if he’s technically reformed. 

with superheroes, he feels kind of like he’s just really good at shooting people? like, what is he here for? is a gun a superpower, bruce? is being your son a fucking superpower? like everything about it just seems truly & utterly stupid to him. but he’s surprisingly good at working on a team though, and takes and gives orders really well, if he isn’t drowning in his own awkward overly intense self-imposed tension.

also, everybody in the superhero world is canonically corny. but they carry a confidence & charm with it, a belief in a system and a world of corniness. that jason only has when he knows he’s being bad on purpose. otherwise he seems like he’s trying too hard not to lose his cool, like he’s beating himself up for every word he gets out, like he’s ready to beat ur ass and his own ass just for daring to still exist and be alive around him.

jason todd thinks too much, rambles often, speaks in rhetoricals bc he believes no one is listening or wants to listen, and always feels put-upon, rejected, and smad. he’s calmed down since he’s past that age in his 20s where he wanted to lash out at everyone and anything---but he still feels like 2 steps away from a breakdown at any minute, except now he doesn’t have some convoluted plan for confrontation with his father, he’s just gonna start fucking crying and shooting the next person he comes across who deserves it.

[cryptocism]

If you don’t mind could you explain a little more about the universes and storylines in your video? i love Tim and Kon but i haven’t read many of the comics cuz i just don’t know where to start

sure thing! most of them are references to specific comics so i can list em here (once i finish searching up the specific issue numbers)

so it starts off in preboot with tim and kon’s very first meeting in Superboy/Robin: World’s Finest Three, wherein tim gets shot out of a canon and kon swoops in to catch him. they beat metallo and poison ivy together (with a lot of bickering) but still it’s the start of a beautiful friendship

jumping over to Young Justice issue #20, there’s tim taking off his mask for the first time (and hes still not able to be totally open about his secret identity but still, big ol show of trust)

skipping wayy ahead (past all of young justice and most of teen titans) to Infinite Crisis #6, wherein kon fights superboy prime and fucking dies in the process. tim is uhh appropriately quite sad about this. he changes his costume to match conner’s colours, goes to the superboy memorial in 52 #51, and in Teen Titans #34 it’s revealed that he’s been trying to re-clone kon in the titans tower basement

then it’s the new 52: tim is putting together the teen titans, kon is a cloning project from NOWHERE (some evil lab thing) and uh - ok im gonna be real i only really skimmed the new 52 teen titans because i didn’t really like it, but i do know that in Teen Titans (2014) #12 there’s an incredibly heartfelt scene between tim and kon immediately before kon sacrifices himself to save the day. again.

then its off to a new universe with the young justice cartoon! and despite the fact that both tim and conner appear in the show they never once speak to each other or have anything to do with one another. maybe they fistbump like... once? idk it was weird but they’re not really friends, just teammates.

then its rebirth babey! 

tim “”””dies”””” in Detective Comics #940, gets saved by the future-evil-batman version of himself in #965, and then future-evil-batman-tim tells him to tell conner he’s sorry in #966 but tim doesn’t know who tf that is, since his memories of kon got messed with

there’s a couple flashes of the different universes, the reunion in preboot when kon comes back to life in Red Robin #9, some stuff from n52 idk they fight a lot, young justice - again, still not really friends, but they have each others backs in a fight.

back to the reunion in preboot, but more like the one in Adventure Comics #3 because it hurts me heart, and then a lil flashback back to the good ol days when they were just silly teenagers in dumb costumes doing their best. they find home in each other anyway im emo

then its pretty exclusively rebirth Young Justice with tim getting zatanna to do some brain magic so he can remember his friends in the flashback in issue #5, kon getting lost in space in issue #3, and then finally reuniting when kon breaks tim out of gemworld prison in #4

the penultimate fractured image is a combination of all the universes with lil tidbits from specific comics that i do not remember right now but alas. most of them are redraws of specific panels that i liked.

then the last image is... basically what i wanted to happen in the rebirth young justice series where they just like.... idk hold each other and marvel at the fact that they found one another again, knowing that they’d try to find each other in every universe, because even if they arent best friends they’ll still always mean something to each other no matter what. basically the lemony snicket letter to beatrice. very much the “on purpose. on purpose i am going to love you” vibes. but more like “on purpose i will love you even if the universe tears us apart again and again, until the end of time i will find you and i will love you, even if i don’t remember, and even if i don’t know why, i will still love you in whatever way i can for as long as this time will let me”

[akimmito]

Heroes are made by the path they choose

Previous | AO3 | Next

_______________

Chapter 6

Jason walks the corridors of the mansion until reaching the entrance to the cave, he feels confident enough to return knowing that the only inhabitants of the mansion are Dick, Tim and Alfred. Bruce and his idea for Batman Inc. have him going around the world... except Paris, why hadn't anyone noticed what was happening in France? A little look at the country and the fucking Constitution has an exclusive item for heroes and vigilantes! Fully proven, the United States fears success. France developed a good relationship with its vigilantes and they are a kind of team without taking orders from each other, but recognizing the authority where it should be.

Certainly nobody expected it, because they are surprised to see it arrive. Dick half-dressed in Batman and Tim's costume completely put, only Alfred remains calm and chances are it's because he already knew it would be there. One must only accept that Alfred is omniscient.

"Hey. Did anyone know that Paris has vigilantes?"Outside the sentimental greetings or whatever, he goes straight to the point. What does it matter that this is the first time you've spoken to them in five years?

"No?"Dick questions confused, they have not looked at Paris in years because they have been calm… disturbing, if he think about it, especially the last seven years, no traffic network of any kind connects with Paris or France in general, that must have caught his attention more than it did. Although if there are vigilantes, It would explain a little. "Since when?"

"Seven years, apparently. I was researching with Roy and we found some information, but as you will see, I don't have the resources you have here. It caught my attention that, according to this boy from twitter, there is also a team of heroes and they are two separate groups, it seems."

That captures more attention from of them, Tim accepts the USB memory that Jason gives him and some images taken by phones and some captures from Parisian news appear. He manages to classify it, putting name with appearance.

"It seems that the leader is Suzaku, I estimate that he could be my age. No idea of their civil identity, they use a kind of transport with portals and I don't know if it's magic or technology. Probably the called Augur is the one in charge of taking them from one place to another, that them to reach the scenes immediately. "

"Interesting. Can you explain us?"Dick gives the free pass to his younger brother to update them with the information, they will not go to a city with vigilantes (he knows that it bothers when they appear in his without warning), but knowing the situation will allow them to be careful if they cross their paths.

"Insurance. Let's see, replacement, unfold all the photographs and I will explain each one of them. What I managed to discover through twitter, because it is the only source of constant information about them. The media says little or almost nothing, beyond mentioning them and thanking them for their services. "

Tim just obeys, saving his thoughts about it. He did know about the vigilantes, but he didn't see it necessary to inform anyone, he even spoke to one of them while he was there, Caelum explained the ways in which the city was working and how they reached a balance with the government, something that took them two years to build and they hoped they would not have third parties hanging around without warning them. Sure, he's not going to tell any of that.

"Well, Suzaku, leader, has magical knowledge, according to users she has put in place safeguards to protect places of interest such as the so-called Akuma Refuges, I don't know what they are, the hospital and health centers, in addition to some government buildings that can also serve as shelters. She's normally paired with Corvus and five days ago she appeared on patrol with Thuban, everyone speculating that he's her son because of dark hair. They talk about her being kind and lethal, emphasis on lethal. One user listed the martial arts styles she mastered, I counted twelve combined with a style much like yours, Dick. "

Dick smiles and looks with some interest at the short-haired little lady, the costume fits perfectly leaving an ideal mobility and reflects a lot that does tricks, there is nothing in the costume that can get in her way. He's curious if she uses any type of weapon, they are not visible to the naked eye.

"Corvus, he seems second in command, his costume reminds me of mine... he seems to have the mettle of a trained assassin. According to users, it's rare that he speaks and if he does it is to give orders, otherwise, they mention that he's cold and even rude, very distant, his weapons use real bullets, but it's rare that he goes to the extreme of using them. There are many strange theories where he's also paired in a romantic relationship with Suzaku, Paris really is strange..."

Tim just stares at the image of the blonde in a costume that mimics the forms of a military one very well and not surprised that Jason knows so much, Paris enjoys talking about her heroes and vigilantes, they are almost celebrities and  they resign themselves to being the professionals who are ignoring all comments on the internet as best as possible.

"Genbu is ruthless and tends to scold civilians when they are endangered by ridiculousness, close combat and needles, acupuncture type, but as an attack, it sleeps their limbs and makes them easier to handle. Byakko usually deals a lot with civilians, she always asks questions and jokes with them, she wears a kind of yellow half-helmet and is really the only thing with color in her entire costume. Seiryuu is... according to twitter, a soulless ex-killer who ignores civilians unless she threatens them with her sword because they have purposely put themselves in danger, they call her Ice Queen... they consider her worse than Corvus. "

Tim laughs, he can vouch for it. While he only spoke to Caelum, the other two were nearby and seemed to want to point their weapons at him. If it wasn't for Suzaku holding them by the shoulders, he thinks they would have been close to him threatening him, she was sweetly dangerous as honey with poison. Remembering that, he decides that it's better to give his own information.

"Before you continue, why are you telling us this? You could just go to Paris and see everything with your own eyes. ”He doesn't pretend to be rude, but it seems he was from the annoyed look Jason gives him.

"Because, genius, I don't have the resources to go there and, as I said at the beginning, neither to investigate them further from here. You should sleep more, your brain hardly works. "

"Jason..."

"Whatever, I'll continue..."

"The easiest to speak are Pyxis, Caelum and Black Metal. Despite the fact that Suzaku is kind, she turns the whole conversation in her favor and always has Corvus around, which makes you feel like you are going to be shot if you neglect for a second, the feeling is worse if Seiryuu is present..."

"Tim, how do you know that?" Dick is curious, especially since he never mentioned having met any team of heroes, but, if he's honest with himself, Tim is like a little version of Bruce and that man won't say anything until it is absolutely and strictly necessary that should know and only says a part. It's frustrating.

"I was in Paris while looking for Bruce and I met them, being attacked by criminals definitely caught their attention. The information on Twitter, although accurate, doesn't do them justice, Paris only sees what the MT lets them see, they have managed to pass next to Batman without him noticing, that is a great feat. And I was able to meet them only because they stopped wanting to know some things, it was basically an exchange of information. "

"I get it."

"Do you know anything about their identities?" Jason asks, is what makes him curious. Little problem inherited from Batman? Yeah, It definitely frustrates not knowing anything.

"Not. I only know what everyone knows, but at least one or more of them must have money, their costume were of incredible quality and I have only seen that level of protection in us. Bruce never skimped on expenses for the costumes, I guess they didn't either..."

They nod to his answer, Tim is excellent at noticing details, so they may consider him to be true information.

"I'm curious, but if they're doing a good job, it's not our business, Jay. We can go browse Paris, but we definitely shouldn't get into her business. "

"You want to see Suzaku, right?" Tim lets out a sigh, why did Jason have to mention the stunts? He didn't say it directly, but made the suggestion when buying his styles. No one can do half the tricks he do, that there is someone in the world who can accompany him in his inhuman stunts and stretches, he must be excited...  and that she has a tight costume and a beautiful body should only generate more expectation.

"I would like to meet her."

"Professionally or in bed?" Jason is more direct and hits just where Tim's thoughts were heading.

"You offends m…"

"Dick, you've had sex with half the women you know..." Tim cuts him off, it's no secret to anyone how many lovers he's had over the years. He's very surprised that he doesn't have a lost son out there, but that only shows how careful he's.

"Yes, man, even villains. Gives you no shame?" Dick snorts at him.

"You have no right, Jay. I remind you that you slept with Talia and two of my girlfriends... in my bed!"

"They could not resist my charms, I think it was your foult. And Talia, well, I have nothing in my defense. "Tim sighs and gets up from his seat, he considers that it’s better to go to bed, he will not be able to work with those two arguing and he could well use a couple of hours of sleep.

He just hopes that if they go to Paris, Dick doesn't really intend to have sex with Suzaku. It gives him the impression that Thuban doesn't get the nickname Demon Boy for nothing and if he's really her son, well maybe Dick won't come back alive from there.

___________

Tim Drake @TimDrakeW_

Can I change families? I want new brothers, please.

____________

Talia Al Ghul.

Damian never expected or wanted to see her again. Why is she here? He doesn't want her close. In the midst of his discomfort, he can only frown at his progenitor.

He writhes, letting himself fall to knees against the hard asphalt, he feels his head throb with pain and each breath is more difficult than the last, it's as if fire breaks through his nose and burns his lungs little by little.

"My son." He growls when he hears her. It's an Akuma attack, he reasons, she's not real. "At last I find you. "She's not real, right? " I will take you back home. "

"You're not my mother." He manages to speak despite feeling his throat tear with every word. "I was just a tool for you and Grandpa, they made it clear... they got rid of me. "He looks furiously at the figure of his... no, Talia. They knew it, he's totally convinced that they knew it...

"That is not true, what that woman told you... "

"My mother said nothing to me! You sent me to my death, it was impossible for me to survive even if I completed the mission... "

Damian still has dreams of that mission, of his planning, of everything he did up to the inevitable outcome in what turned out to be the enemy base with around fifty targets scattered throughout the small underground fortress.

He complains and a groan escapes his throat, if he were using the prodigy would it be different? He hears a deep voice beside him, but everything is suffocated by Talia's presence and the pain that breathing generates.

A few more minutes and he falls unconscious, his mind plunges into the haze of memories that still haunt him.

The full moon hangs over the night sky at its highest point, the lighting is sufficient to allow you to see the entire perimeter from the trees. Damian watches the assassins move around, standing guard, looking like they are waiting for an attack, and he wonders if they have discovered it, although from their posture they seem to expect something more frontal and not as stealthy as their plans. It doesn't matter, he will only go for his target and if someone gets in the way, he will kill him on the spot. It just needs to be fast and efficient.

He jumps out of the tree to head towards the fortress, taking advantage of the minute it takes to turn around, just in time, when he has climbed the roof, the guards are positioned at the place where he climbed. He go his way as his plan how to get them out of the way, it would be much better if he get rid of all the low-level organization.

He walks the corridors cautiously, he has disabled several targets and has hidden them, they are dead, of course, the surprise factor gave him that benefit. Everything is going well, as expected, the group are just a bunch of incompetents.

Damian manages to reach his target without a scratch, but can't find it where it should be. He clicks his tongue in disgust, it's a setback.

"I am offended that Ra’s believes that a child will be enough to kill me. Bad luck for you, now, be a good boy and serve as training for my new power."

Damian turns to the origin of the voice and sees a man in a lilac costume simulating the standard equipment of the League of Assassins, his skin seems to glow in pink tones and his eyes turned dark... he looked discordant, very dark and colorful at the same time. He frowns and attacks him, pulls out his swords, but... his attack doesn't touch him.

The entire room suddenly begins to spin and as he tries to recover, the traitor is on him with twin swords running through his abdomen. The blood gushes immediately when the swords are removed and this time the dizziness is from the blood being lost at alarming rates.

The last thing Damian sees is a woman dressed in black wearing a whip with silver inscriptions, using it to grab the traitor by the neck, even in low light he can recognize her blue eyes that seem to glow much more as the darkness swallows his consciousness.

_________

Ladybug come back @ LadybugHero_89

Paris became Tokyo-3? Will an Eva appear? Is this night a NGE and The Mist crack fic?

Bro don´t leave me alone @DDD_Lol214

I don't want to be in that fog, brother, the screams are terrifying.

MarcusGentleman @ TheMaster_091

I can see Ladynoir fall into the mist, hell, no one warned me that I would be experiencing an angel's siege.

____________

Ladynoir jumps on the huge rhombus, it's certainly peculiar and their could not believe that there is a person inside. They must break through the outer cortex to reach the real Akuma and her objective, therefore her powers are the best point of action. It's a real problem that he had a force field.

"An AT field! I can't believe it. ”He manages to hear Max over the communications before falling straight into the mist. She can also listen to others talk.

"What is an AT field?" Kagami almost growled at the Akuma's troublesome abilities.

"It's basically a shield... which is troublesome, I think only the cataclysm could go through it if it has the same defensive properties as the anime."

"Perfect. I'll give the new Hawkmoth points for achieving a new level of annoyance. "Chloe complains from the roof of the Luxembourg Palace, everyone is analyzing the situation, but seeing that he has a shield that they won't be able to get through, they just have to wait for Marinette to recover… what is taking a time.

"It seems the mist is a problem." Nathaniel exposes everyone's concerns. If it were a normal mist, Ladynoir would be back on the rooftops by now.

"Many civilians report screaming in the mist, some liken it to a scene from a horror movie..." Kagami reviews the app with her yo-yo, looking at all the testimonies they are giving. That helps them determine the Akuma's powers.

"Ilusions?"Nathaniel questions.

"Probably." Felix agrees.

"What if it's not mist?" Luka questions, capturing everyone's attention, who wait for him to continue. "It could be a type of gas, they should collect a little and analyze it. That way they can use the filters on their weapons and not run the same fate as Ladynoir. "

And as they try to regroup, on the streets, just below the Akuma. Marinette meets Talia Al Ghul's voice, the suit protects her enough not to be so affected by the mist, but she still feels pain when breathing.

If you think you can steal my son, you are wrong. I'll take him back.

Marinette ignores her, it's just a voice in the middle of a mist caused by an Akuma. Yes, she fears that Damian decides to go with Talia or his biological father (even though the boy has not told her who he is), but she's in the middle of a battle and she's no longer girl, she has trained her mind and her fears will not be what stops her. However, without the cane, she should run towards the buildings, but between the voice and the pain when breathing, it becomes difficult.

He prefers to be with his REAL family.

She continues to move towards the closest building, it's incredible that the mist doesn't let her see the Akuma, but that's the way it's. It seems like a world apart... and seeing that it's not really moving in the direction she expects, she begins to think that it's.

He will never love you. You are not his real mother.

Marinette, surprisingly, stumbles and falls. She complains, she had spent years without tripping and much longer without falling by her own feet. When she looks up, she's surrounded by a body, she holds her breath, they are the people who were close when the mist appeared and without any protection, they only perished being chased by their fears.

It's beautiful to see, these scenarios are the ones that Damian loves.

Marinette blocks her voice, ignoring it. If there are civilians here… Damian should have been close and if he couldn't get away, he was trapped… Oh, no.

She gets up again and, trembling a little because they are all dead, begins to search, hoping that she doesn't meet the body of her little boy.

But she's not the bearer of the black cat for nothing, she sees it, her black suit with the details in green and runs towards him, stumbling again and falling to her knees in front of him. She takes him in her arms, he barely breathing.

"Oh honey." She hugs him to her chest and touches her communications. "Augur?"

"Oh, what a relief you communicate. We need you to break through the Akuma's defenses. "

"I understand, but you open a portal, please. The mist doesn't allow me to find high points and I lost the cane... also, I have Thuban here."

"Okay, I'll bring you to the MT for Plagg to eat something before you use his power."

"That would be fine. "

A portal opens in front of her and advances as fast as she can to avoid the mist passing through its, the difference is felt when she breathing. She drops down next to the transformation, hugging Damian tighter. Longg comes out of a hiding place inside the costume.

"I try talking to him, if he transformed he would last longer... but it seems he was looking at his birth mother." The little dragon looks with concern at his current owner and then looks at she with resolution. "Combine my prodigy with Plagg's, my beams must be strong enough to cross that field, so you won't leave him a chance to replace his shield."

"Okay, let's do that."

____________

Just Robert @PoorButterflies

District VI is a disaster. Suddenly I no longer miss Gabriel Agreste as a villain, he was not so creative with his evil.

Dick Grayson @TheFlyingGrayson

It seems that a visit to Paris is in sight.

Roy @RoyHarperQ

@TheFlyingGrayson I'm not surprised that you go.

Jason @IAmYisus_XD

@TheFlyingGrayson @RoyHarperQ See, Dick? Everyone knows your ways.

Polaris Vermilion @Elgato_Solaris

Is one of @BruceWayneOfficial's adoptive boys coming to Paris? Oh oh. Hey, @TheFlyingGrayson! You must know @MarieLenoir goes the same way as your adoptive father haha

[femmescripter]

Assurance of My Stay & Special Announcements

Hey there. I hope that y’all are doing well today. I don’t know how many of my friends and followers are still here after The Great Purge not long ago, but to the ones who do see this it’s good to see you! I hope we can talk some time. 

So I wanted to tell you guys some important things, and I won’t prolong it and will just get into it.

Ahem...

So first off - one of the reasons why I’ve been almost nonexistent here on Tumblr is because I’ve been busy with writing commissions and looking for steady work. The whole ban on risque content for Tumblr didn’t help either. Then we have the world wide pandemic of the C-Virus which really kicked things up from ten to ten thousand. And in between all of that I have been dealing with a...rough situation, to say the least of it, in my personal life that is still ongoing. I won’t go into the gory details but I’ll say that it’s the primary reason for looking for steady work in order to make enough money to get my own place. Having explained all of this I want you all to know I’m not trying to purposely keep away from you. Nor do I plan to leave Tumblr even with the ban. I just got important things to focus on. 

But I still love all of you and didn’t forgot you! It’s my end goal to finally get at least my work load done and be able to come back to Tumblr and try to enjoy the site once more. And if you’re all willing to accept me again that would make it even better. So yeah. This about covers the announcement that I am truly alive.

Now, onto some cheerful news I want to share with y’all. 

For the past two years I have been working on revising the plot, world setting and characters of my original light novel series. It’s been a long and grueling process but immensely fulfilling. And I think you’ll really enjoy this light novel series. At the moment I am currently working with @lucy-dont-give-a-fuck to make the character artwork for the main characters first and foremost. After that we’ll work on the other artwork needed for the pilot. And in between all of that I’ll be writing the story of said pilot. I can’t go into more detail than that but I will say that once things are done and sorted I’ll be posting a link to a crowdfunding page where you all can donate to support the project. It’s my goal to make the pilot both available in physical print and also put it up on Tapas for people to view it digitally in case you can’t come to the locations I’ll be selling it.  That’s cheerful news bit #1. Cheerful news bit #2 involves a fanfic remake and the mass editing of another fanfic. The fanfic that I’m going to remake is an old Tygra/Lion-O alternate universe fanfiction I made based on the 2011 Thundercats reboot series. Which, by the way, is criminally underrated and did not deserved to be cancelled on such a cliffhanger as it was. They should have focused on that instead of giving us the trash that is Thundercats Roar. Regardless - that’s the fanfic I plan to remake. Having grown as a writer I’ve developed a better plot for it and plan to delete the old version and replace it with a new one. I will post it exclusively to Archive Of Our Own and FanfictionNet. Now to go over the mass editing of a different story, Batman Beyond: The Heir. It really amazed me how many people liked that fic so much. And I’m ashamed of my for neglecting it like I have. Again this has to do with work and other major things that have gone on in my life that make updating stories difficult. But I plan to continue that story! Before that however I need to do a lot of editing with the current chapters and fix some mistakes, clear up loose ends, ect. So be sure to stay tuned for more Rex/Terry goodness! Additionally I will be likewise editing my Thief/Dishonored crossover story Business & Pleasure so that I can continue that as well. I also got a lot of new one-shots I plan to put out to keep you guys entertained in the meantime. I got other fanfics in the work as well. Also to anyone who still likes Voltron: The Legendary Defender and likes Lotor/Keith or James/Keith please do reach out to me! It’s so hard to find people who like either pairing as a genuine couple and not as hateful exes or with Lotor or James being a creepy stalker to Keith. And I got stories and headcanons planned for them, too. Lastly - I want to put out a notice that I’ll be editing and completely revamping some of my old Justice League: Gods & Monsters character biographies. I’ve recently found myself reconnecting with the franchise and after delving more into DC lore and media I came up with some new ideas. So expect changes on that end too. I will probably end up reblogging old character biographies I edit and making posts for new, revamped bios. And don’t worry. I’ll make bios for new characters, too! I can honestly say that I have evolved a great deal in my writing skills and have learned many new techniques to make my stories better for my audience, you lovely people, to enjoy! If you don’t want to stick around though I can understand that. I have been gone for a long time. But if you guys do want to see how much I’ve improved with my work then I’m happy to share in my journey with you.

Welp. That’s everything. I’m sorry that this was such a long read but I didn’t want to leave out anything. Also if you want to follow me on Twitter and Instagram just reach out to me and I’ll give you the handles for those profiles. Until next time - all of you please take care and remember to wash your hands! I love you guys very much.