#for the aros who may see this post. i know that 'just friends' is a touchy wording rn but i do not have anything better in my vocabulary

[peridots-pixiwolf]

[Start ID. A green-toned drawing of two characters from an original universe, shown from the shoulders up. It's framed as though they're taking a selfie. On the left is Heathrow, a human with dark skin, long hair, a good number of facial scars, and two painted lines below each eye. He wears something akin to a green hoodie, with fluffy plant matter sewn into the back of the hood. On the right is Crassie, a half elf, which in this universe entails long pointed ears, a pair of short pale horns, a slightly rabbit-like nose and markings under her eyes. Her skin is olive-toned, sporting a couple distinct scars on her face and hand, and she's wearing what is essentially a bush and spiked glovelets. Both of them are smiling, Crassie a little bit wide-eyed and Heathrow with a fond expression. The background's a saturated green with the text "1 YEAR!". End ID]

A redraw-in-spirit of the post from last year's Feb 16 that introduced these two to my blog. It's their birthday :]

[spitefularoandbi]

My feelings on Wednesday (2022)

Wednesday and Enid really are just friends this season. Yall girlies need to chill, you all always queerbait me harder than any corporation ever has.

"There was no point to the guys, she didn't even like them!" That was the point, that's why #aromantic was trending. She's aromantic.

More below:

Enid was very enthusiastic about her boyfriend understanding that *she* wanted him to ask her out. There's not enough bisexual readings or headcanoning on her because of this and other canon actions she's shown. Yall are cowards and sad. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ also I really like the queer coding in her part of the story (and I too didn't really like that she eventually wolfed out, it felt like the writers got scared of their implications and wanted to backpeddle).

I like christianity being the bad guy again. I did not misread the show, the dude was a puritan and kept saying that he was gonna send Wednesday to hell. So christian girlies don't @ me lol

Seriously, Wednesday and Enid did nothing but friend stuff. I think anyway. Like their time together could be read as kinda girl crush-ish, but also. That's just friendship. Yall can call me homophobic i fucking guess, but this is the kind of fandom crap that got Cas/Misha Collins sent to Super Hell lol, and Supernatural actually had Dean with canon bisexual easter egg, in-show facts. I waited and waited for, mostly Enid, to say something explicitly queer and. Idek yall, do I need to rewatch? I did get up for a sec to unload and reload the washer and dryer lol. Tumblr seriously queerbaited this. Yall need to tag as #headcanon or something bc I was sure they were gonna do more than hug for 5 secs lol

I liked the Bianca redemption stuff, I know that everyone's kinda friends now anyway but I hope Bianca and Wednesday become a duo of sorts next season.

I liked the uptick in Wednesday just, like, dropping her latina heritage. Even some of the music in the show sounded Hispanic? Am I saying the right words lol? But I liked it.

We seriously got this line and yall thought she's alloro?

^none of that means she's only denying a m/f relationship - she's refusing ALL relationships in this statement.

Principal Weems 😍

*screaming crying throwing myself down stairs* I think I've always liked Gwendoline Christie in anything I've seen her in, she looked amazing here in this show!!!!!!! I'm so sad about The Thing happening but she was good!!!!

Ok. That's all I have tonight lol

[musingsofanaroace]

AroAce Umbrella

In this post, I will discus the following terms: AroAce, Angled AroAce, Oriented AroAce, AroAceFlux, and AroAceSpike.

Let's start with AroAce.

A person who identifies as AroAce experiences little to no romantic or sexual attraction. They don't look at someone and go, "Oh, they're cute. I wonder if they're seeing someone. And if not, I wonder if they'd like to go out with me." They don't look at someone and go, "Oh, they're hot. I wonder if they're down for Netflix and chill." They may, on the other hand, get to know someone and go, "Oh, they're such a cool person, and they share many of my interests. I wonder if they'd like to be my best friend for all eternity."

Now, let's move on to Angled AroAce.

An Angled AroAce experiences some romantic and sexual attraction, but this attraction falls solidly within both the aromantic and asexual spectrums. The romantic or sexual attraction they experience may feel nebulous and complicated. "Oh, that person's good looking. Would I want to ask them out on a date? Maybe not." In addition to experiencing some romantic and sexual attraction, they may also experience tertiary attraction, such as platonic, emotional (alterous), physical (sensual), and/or aesthetic.

Next, let's look at Oriented AroAce.

Oriented AroAces experience little to no romantic or sexual attraction, but they do experience a strong tertiary attraction. Many who identify as oriented AroAce will also identify with another orientation label, but they only identify with this label in a nonromantic and nonsexual way. For example, a lesbian oriented AroAce may look at an attractive woman and go, "Oh, that woman's hot. But not in a sexual way. Most definitely in an aesthetic way."

On to AroAceFlux.

Note: I don't know if this is the correct flag.

AroAceFlux individuals experience a flux between their romantic and sexual orientations, but it always stays on the aro and ace spectrum. The flux can occur simultaneously or independently of each other. One day, you could experience no romantic and sexual attraction; and the next day, you could experience some romantic and no sexual attraction; and the day after that, you could experience no romantic and some sexual attraction. As the name implies, attraction is always in constant flux and motion. You may see someone and go, "Damn, I wonder if that person's single." You may see that same person at a different time and go, "They have nice eyes, I guess."

Lastly, let's look at AroAceSpike.

AroAceSpike individuals generally don't feel any romantic or sexual attraction, but they will occasionally feel a strong romantic or sexual attraction for a brief moment of time. Some will use only this term to describe their sexual orientation while others will use an additional orientation label. They'll use this additional label to describe the type of romantic or sexual attraction they periodically feel. For example, a biromantic AroAceSpike individual will periodically feel romantic attraction towards the opposite and same gender as themselves; whereas, a homosexual AroAceSpike individual will periodically feel sexual attraction towards the same gender as themselves. They may see someone and go, "Oh, they're so pretty. I could just drown in their eyes." A brief moment later, they look at this same person and go, "Oh, never mind. Whatever I felt for them before has gone."

I would like to close this post by saying that I fall solidly under the AroAce term. Never in my life have I experienced sexual or romantic attraction. I have experienced emotional and aesthetic attraction but not necessarily in regards to people. I react to a beautiful painting the same way that I react to someone who has very beautiful eyes. "Ah, that's pretty." And after that brief thought, I simply get on with the rest of my day. As a result, I may not have given the best descriptions or examples of Angled AroAce, Oriented AroAce, AroAceFlux, or AroAceSpike.

If you are AroAce and disagree with any of my definitions or would like to share your own AroAce experiences, please leave a comment in the notes. I just love connecting with all my fellow AroAces out there in the digital realm.

And if you're not AroAce, I'd still like to hear from you. Especially the other folks on the aro and ace spectrum. ❤️

Well, that's all I have for today. Until next time, take care and stay curious.

Source:

The umbrella chart is from Victoria Barron. She's a visual artist and author. Check out her website:

For research, I used LGBTQIA+ Wiki:

[bloggingboutburgers]

this past week my qpp of almost two years broke up with me. and i know for you, you said you wouldn't necessarily feel heartbroken if your qpr came to an end, but for me, it felt more heartbreaking than some of my past romantic breakups. this whole thing made me wonder if maybe im not queerplatonic or aro enough to be in a qpr, or if id ever want to be in a qpr again. but seeing you post about your qpr gives me hope that queerplatonic love is something that i can experience fully. so thank you for always sharing your story, because that's what's helping me heal right now <3

Aah, to be perfectly honest, as much as I sorta "downplay" it compared to what it must feel for people who experience romantic attraction... I've had a time where I almost felt like I couldn't go on with my QPP as well and the sheer thought of it was really hard to bear too, so my words here aren't necessarily being very fair to the reality of things.

It was during the travel ban of March 2020 to November 2021 where citizens of my country and others weren't allowed to enter the US unless we spent 15 days in a country that wasn't banned. It made it much harder than usual to visit my partner and as it was nearing 2 years with nobody aware it was going on anymore and US people more concerned about whether they'd be able to have turkey for Thanksgiving, my hope was running really thin. So for a few days in mid-October, as I was at rock bottom, I was starting to write in passing to my partner about how maybe going on wasn't worth it because the separation was too hard on us, it wasn't showing signs of stopping, and the whole thing maybe wasn't worth the pain if they could live their life happily and not have to worry about me who couldn't visit.

And then we videocalled at some point, and when they tearfully told me that even if it did end then and there, they wanted me to keep the promise ring they'd recently given me, I suddenly felt a quiet rage in me going like "No. Fuck this. Look at them. I love them. And I love this too much to allow some cruel governmental decision to end it. If it ever ends, it'll be because WE want it to end. Not because of shit like this."

...I'm making it sound super dramatic but yeah long story short this is also a big reason why we're planning to get married. So that when the US government decides to put a ban on countries including mine again, they can't stop us from vibing together this time.

I guess... I still don't wanna 100% assume we'll be together forever because I don't wanna trap them in a situation they may no longer feel happy in. We're doing great now, but I still have it in the back of my mind that maybe someday they'll get sick of me (they say they never will and that'd be dope if they never did, but never say never and all), or we'll both just want other things, and if it ends like that, then... Yeah, that'd be alright. Much more alright than the way it almost ended.

(...Oh, and for the record, if a friendship of mine ended abruptly, or if my brothers stopped being on good terms with me, I'm pretty sure I'd be just as heartbroken, to be fair. And it'd feel like my reality was collapsing a little. I guess anything ending, any human connection ending, has that effect to a degree, if it's important enough, after all.)

Though describing things like that does make it a bit harder to define what makes it "queerplatonic" as opposed to "romantic", I still... Just have that feeling in my gut that it isn't romance, y'know? It's kinda... A mix between being close friends and being an old married couple without ever having gone through the grandiose passion-honeymoon phase. Maybe that phase IS what defines romance per se. I don't know. Maybe someday I'll find more answers, but it's kinda hard to find answers when you have no idea how romance works to begin with I guess 🙈

In any case... Sorry if I caused any confusion or if I made you question your validity. The thing is pretty simple to be honest: if you feel you're aro, you're veeeeeery likely to BE aro. Because nobody can make that call but you and nobody can name the relationships you have but you. And if amongst everything you even FOUND the words "aro" or "queerplatonic" in a world where those identities and types of relationships are so aggressively hidden or erased, then it's gotta stand for something.

...I guess at the very least THIS I can be certain of TwT Sorry I'm a bit messy about all of this myself, I'm still also going on about it trying to figure it out day by day, but I owed it to you and everyone to be honest. These things are hard to define and I hope to keep finding better and better words to do so someday. TwT

[chubs-deuce]

Something that I hate that ppl do when it comes to hating on Chalastor is saying “Alastor is aroace and Charlie is in a relationship with Vaggie! You’re being disrespectful to both of them!” Even when you explain that’s it’s merely a harmless AU, they still get soooo upset.

Which first off, Alastor is actually ace, not aroace, Amir literally said that himself, and second, just cuz Charlie is with Vaggie doesn’t mean other people are going to ship them, cuz Charlie is bisexual! And thirdly, being ace or aro or both is a spectrum. It’s a wide range of things, not everyone is going to be repulsed. Yeah canon show Alastor maybe repulsed by sex and romance but that’s what AUs are for! They are there for others to expand and change things as they see fit.

Like I think Chaggie is a cute canon ship, but I find Charlie and Alastor and even RadioRose far more appealing and adorable, and especially when it comes to the fanart. Like the fanart! Every piece of Chalastor and RadioRose fanart I have seen is just *chef kiss* ✨perfection✨ seriously your art of Chalastor has got to be my favorite fanart I’ve seen of them, everything is just so beautiful 😭🥹 also I’m a huge sucker for Dad!Alastor

Before I dig into this response any further I'd like to thank you for the high praise of my art, but I'd also like to point out that I don't exactly appreciate the negative tone you're bringing into my inbox here and would like to kindly remind you that my asks are not a confession booth for fandom salt... ^^"

I understand that it can be really frustrating to deal with that kind of stuff, but I feel like a lot of this belongs more in dms than in an ask box that gets responded to publicly...

Fuck knows I have my own not-so-nice opinions about some things certain people in fandoms do, especially considering the nigh constant harrassment some ships are under by other sub-groups of the fanbase, but I vent that shit privately with friends where it won't kick any beehives into a tizzy along the way... It also imo just reflects on the rest of the ship community a bit better to not make big public stinks over some faceless douchebags on the internet with too much time to waste ^^".

(Yes this is an open invitation to just dm me with fandom salt like this if you need to unload some, I'll happily indulge you there! But I really would prefer keeping fandom salt out of my asks and in turn out of my public posts lmao)

Ultimately I'm a strong believer of ship and let ship and I am also of the opinion that if you need to put down another ship to enjoy your own you're not doing the shipping thing right.

Indulging in romantic and/or sexual fantasies about fictional characters is meant to be fun! We're all just sitting in our own little corner making our dolls kiss after all.

Unfortunately, I think a lot of people in this modern era of fandom spaces keep forgetting that. For many, shipping is a competition for bragging rights (i.e. canonicity), a form of activism or for yet again others it can be an excuse to mask bully urges and habits as exerting moral superiority (hence the constant, hypocrisy-filled barbs at people not "respecting" their canon sexualities)

Depending on which one you're dealing with, you may get genuine confusion at your shipping preferences since they approach shipping with a completely different mindset (i.e. shipping for canoncity and/or aesthetics over the narrative potential and/or writing quality) or people intentionally trying to bait you into a defensive response.

Sometimes you can argue someone out of their frustration about your lack of "respect" for canon by explaining that what you do doesn't affect canon in the slightest, nor do you even want or need it to - maybe even giving your reasons for shipping something! But that only works on people that are already receptive to your arguments, so you have to know who and what you're up against and if they're even worth wasting that sort of time and energy on.

I can assure you that 90% of the time the easiest option is to just block antis without giving them the grace of a response. It's usually the quickest way to get out of those types of situations lol (ignore them if they start claiming that they "won" and consider you weak or cowardly for blocking them - they just want to guilt you into unblocking so they have more free reign to keep harrassing you)

[prince-liest]

Hi! About your staticradio series (which is PHENOMENAL omg😍) - I know you said Vox is kinda falling in love while Al will remain aro. Which is awesome, we love to see rep! But I'm wondering if they will end up as QPPs (who fuck, lol)? Or it'll strictly be FWBs? Gah it's diffifult to describe it bc labels are so subjective and often too limiting, but I guess what I'm asking is whether they'll have an emotional relationship too, however it might look with their orientations? Will Al in particular have any soft feels for Vox & be fond of their unique bond? Even if Vox is in love with him when Al himself isn't? (I worry that would scare Al away😭) An intimate emotional closeness regardless of the specifics?

Thank you so much!! I've been enjoying writing it enormously so it always brings me a lot of joy that other folks are, too. >:D Just a heads up, this post has turned a little long because it got me talking about Alastor and the way he handles his feelings vs his ego in general.

First: I think the answer to this depends fully on how you personally define a queerplatonic partnership! I don't think Alastor would ever go for, like, a committed relationship with Vox in any form, but I also don't think that this would necessarily be a sad state of affairs for Vox, who I obviously write as poly as fuck with his toxic yaoi husband. Maybe it's because I'm aro af, but I feel like from Vox's end, "Yeah, I get to fuck around with the guy I'm obsessed with and he's not, like, nice, but I think I Stockholmed him into giving a shit about me!" is not actually a state of affairs he'd dislike! Especially since it's got that shiny "I'm special!" vibe in the sense that Nobody Else Gets To Get This Far With Alastor.

As for Alastor's side of things...

I think that so much of their dynamic dynamic isn't just set by Alastor being aroace, it's also set by him being a fucking sadist and a narcissist, HAHA. Like, he is very much in the middle of developing feelings about Vox, which (if my favorite interpretation of his little breakdown in the finale is correct) is also where his character arc is heading with regards to the hotel crew in canon, too, but his friendship-and-trust arc is slowburn as all hell and not entirely linear.

Part of the fun in writing Alastor is the process of qualifying all of his feelings with his sense of superiority in a way that is protective of his ego. He is freely and openly fond of people when that fondness doesn't expose any kind of emotional vulnerability in him. For example: He feels a condescending but genuine fondness for Niffty and Mimzy, whom he protects, and that's safe! He's quirky friends with Rosy, who is a benevolent semi-equal who uplifts his ego, and that's safe! He... may or may not have started caring enough about the hotel crew to have put himself at risk for them, and that is not only dangerous to his physical well-being but also massively humiliating, which is arguably worse to someone like Alastor.

He has SO many ego-prioritizing defense mechanisms and it's fun for me to pay attention to because I, too, am someone whose cardinal sin is probably pride. Anything is permissible only as long as it can be framed in a way that doesn't insult his ego.

Anyway, the point is: I don't think "soft feels and fondness for their unique bond" is on the list of ways that Alastor is able to find himself feeling about someone like Vox. The whole reason their whole situation in 666: Live on Air! started is thanks to Alastor's awareness and amusement at how obsessed Vox is with him. He sees himself as above Vox, and knowing that Vox is more emotionally invested than he is is part of the appeal. It's just gone from (derogatory) to (fond). (Which is, guess what? Safe!)

(It also means realizing that Vox is falling madly in love or whatever just nets a reaction somewhere in the region of, "Wait, is that significantly different from what you were already doing?", lol, because the only thing that's changed is the flavor of feeling, not the level of exposed emotional underbelly that he thinks Vox is showing him.)

TL;DR: He likes Vox like a cat likes a favorite mouse.

[supernovaae]

Yandere! Yamato x G/N! Reader Headcanons

-.'✰'.- [a/n]: This is my first piece of fanfic content ever made (and posted). I hope it you guys like it lol

-.'✰'.- Content Warnings; yandere, stalking, kidnapping, manipulation, mentions of death (not detailed), loss of free will,

-.'✰'.- Additional Information: Minors DNI, not proofread, grammatical errors, possibly ooc(?), reader is not an esper.

I do not support the following topics in real life.

Shadowing someone who's never met or formally interacted with you may be considered a.. very unconventional activity, to say the least, but Yamato couldn't think of a better way to use his spare time as of late.

He paid close attention to your mannerisms, watching like a hawk as you fidgeted and bounced in place, periodically checking your phone.

What for? Were you waiting for something?

He didn't dwell on the thought for too long, opting to continue observing as you absentmindedly entertained yourself from where you stood.

Everything seemed perfectly fine to him.

Yamato turned away from you, just for a moment, and extracted his phone from his pocket, intending to check how much time he had left.

Glancing back to you briefly, he-

Wait.

His eyes narrow, body going rigid.

Despite being a ways away, he watched closely as you greeted a briskly approaching someone that he'd never seen before.

His grip on his phone tightened.

Who are they?

You embraced them briefly before conversing, quite expressively at that, with them.

Who is that?

Something apprehensive and wary bubbled up inside of him once the individual laid a hand on your shoulder and leaned in to say something to you.

Did you meet them recently?

They have to be new, or else he would know who they were.

What do they want from-

A raucous chortle suddenly fell from your lips before you stifled your apparent glee by placing your hand over you mouth.

Yamato heavily exhaled, his form visibly relaxing.

They must've told you a joke.

They're friendly.

It's nothing to worry about.

From where it rests in his hand, Yamato's phone vibrates.

He looks down at the device and sees a calendar alert displayed on it's screen.

He has to host an assembly meeting soon.

He sighs and moves to leave, making a mental note to run a background check on the individual talking with you later as he glanced over one more time before exiting the building.

He'll have to make his introduction to you soon.

It's best not to have any troublesome new acquaintances of yours complicating things for him.

-.'🪬'.- Yamato takes it upon himself to judge everyone who attempts to approach you. There's always more than what meets the eye.

-.'🪬'.- Certain companions and coworkers are fine, but people who intend to court you or have ulterior motives are dealt with swiftly.

-.'🪬'.- In order to minimize his chances of failing to pique your interest and keep it, he's has to know as much about you as possible while also keeping others out of the picture.

-.'🪬'.- Whether Yamato's following from somewhere close behind or receiving updates from a disguised subordinate, he almost always has eyes on you.

-.'🪬'.- Once he uses the information he's gathered to approach and reel you in, he's practically always with you in his downtime (he still has to lead the Twilight Order).

-.'🪬'.- From where he stands beside you as a relatively close friend, he can micromanage your relationships more effectively, picking and choosing who is and isn't good for you to be talking to.

-.'🪬'.- Even the friendly-looking ones cant escape his scrutinizing gaze.

-.'🪬'.- If any people that he's deemed unwelcome slip through the cracks and manage to make it to the conversation stage with you, Yamato's standing right behind you and giving that person a death stare.

-.'🪬'.- If you catch on and ask him about it, he'll look away, an artificial replica of a sheepish expression forming on his face as he explains that he's had a few bad experiences in his own life that have left him wary of everyone around him and he just wanted to make sure that you were safe.

-.'🪬'.- As you express your remorse for making him revisit such awful memories and thank him for his help, he simply smiles and assures you that it's fine.

-.'🪬'.- You trust far too easily.

-.'🪬'.- His smile wanes, just for a moment.

-.'🪬'.- Your faith in others could become a detriment.

-.'🪬'.- While he was absolutely ecstatic that you welcomed him into your life and home with open arms and let him bear witness to all of the little things that make you who you are, he couldn't help but listen to the little inkling in the back of his mind that told him that you would've let anyone in under the same pretenses.

-.'🪬'.- That someone could’ve spelt your doom.

-.'🪬'.- Taking note of his currently strained relationship with his own sister, he'll tread carefully, not wanting to make the same mistakes as last time.

-.'🪬'.- But, at this point, If he sees you at risk or in peril, especially if it’s due to another human being, he’s made up his mind.

-.'🪬'.- Naturally, you became apprehensive when Yamato told you that he decided that your safety was worth more than your autonomy, but it was nothing that the music box couldn’t quell.

-.'🪬'.- He’d take your docile body by the hand and lead you to the Twilight Order’s base, where you’d be quartered and prohibited from leaving the premises from then on.

-.'🪬'.- No amount of pleading or tears will dissuade him from his decision to keep you with him.

-.'🪬'.- If his own sister’s screams of anguish couldn’t change his mind, you have no chance of convincing him.

-.'🪬'.- He understands that you're most likely going to despise him for what he's done to you, so he's slow and methodical in his attempts to regain your affections and normalize your new life.

-.'🪬'.- His main goal is to condition you psychologically by slowly changing your interpretation of what's happening to you whilst also using your self-preservation instincts against you.

-.'🪬'.- You have more privileges and freedoms, and even Yamato himself will be nothing but cordial to you as long as you remain compliant.

-.'🪬'.- But, if you act particularly unruly, he’ll use the music box to control you, essentially trapping you in your own body and turning you into a glorified dress-up doll.

-.'🪬'.- It seems cruel, yes, but he's only doing it so you'll stop hurtling insults at him.

-.'🪬'.- He's been nothing but kind to you when you treat him with basic politeness, so why hurt both of you like this?

-.'🪬'.- Just stay agreeable. Things will be easier for both of of you.

-.'🪬'.- He hopes that, over a period of time, you'll grow to love him again. Just like you did before.

-.'🪬'.- As a precaution, he’ll test you every once in a while. These tests include keys and keycards in areas where you might come across them, just to see if you’ll take the bait and try to run.

-.'🪬'.- If you do fall for it, he’ll have people waiting for you at the exit, ready to snatch you up and take you right to him.

-.'🪬'.- As you stare at him with wide, glossy eyes while meaningless apologies spill from your lips, he's disappointed, to say the least.

-.'🪬'.- You'll start right back at square one, confined to your room again, having completely lost his trust.

-.'🪬'.- If you decide to bring the object back to him personally, he'll be over the moon with delight, taking it back with a warm smile.

-.'🪬'.- You came to him.

-.'🪬'.- You want to stay with him.

-.'🪬'.- You trust him.

-.'🪬'.- Eventually, he’ll give you just enough leeway to roam the building (with limited surveillance).

-.'🪬'.- Don’t even try to ask anyone for help. They’ll report it to Yamato so fast, it’ll give you whiplash.

-.'🪬'.- As long as he doesn’t hear anything suspicious from those watching over you, he might even let you take walks outside, with either him or one of most trusted associates, if you’re feeling restless when he’s unavailable.

-.'🪬'.- Now, if you're playing the long game and putting up a lovey-dovey front so you can gain just enough breathing room to make your getaway, you better hightail it once you step foot out of the Twilight Order's base.

-.'🪬'.- The moment Yamato receives the news that his sweet, adoring significant other left him in the dust, the second he realizes that every single smile, laugh, and whisper that ever graced his senses were products of treacherous deceit, he’s livid and frantic and having an ugly, visceral meltdown.

-.'🪬'.- How could you do this to him?

-.'🪬'.- He’s outraged at what you’ve done, but also hysterical at what could happen to you. Especially since you’re out of his sight.

-.'🪬'.- You could get horribly lost, cross paths with a Miramon, or you might misplace your trust and lose your life to an individual with nefarious intent.

-.'🪬'.- Fueled by some twisted, churning mixture of distress and fury, he’d send as many people as he could spare to hunt you down and bring you back, he himself joining the hunt.

-.'🪬'.- You would be lucky if you were caught and dragged back to base by one of his subordinates.

-.'🪬'.- If he finds you in the state that he’s currently in, he might just forget that you’re not as durable as he is, since you’re not an esper.

-.'🪬'.- All he’s really focused on is getting your hands off of your ears and your mind under the music box’s control so you can stop fighting him.

-.'🪬'.- He’s only trying to protect you. You'll understand eventually.

[✰-notes-✰]: I'm not too confident in the way this looks since i'm personally not a fan of the bullet point format, but I couldn't come up with enough connected ideas to write a full oneshot, so.. anyway, please lmk if you like it or if there are any awkward mistakes!

[cindernet-explorer]

Pinned post v2! Now with more characters!

U'nia Redfeather

Pronouns: She/Her

Gender: Trans Woman

Sexuality: Polyamourous Lesbian/Demi

Bloodline: Mixed Duskwight/Xaela

Jobs: Mystic Knight [MTK] (PLD with more magic w/ sword imbueing), MNK, AST/WHM Hybrid, DRK, FSH, CUL

Height: 7'8"

Short Bio: Selectively mute and willing to sit on the sidelines in a conversation, U'nia seems to most as the stoic silent type. To those that know her, however, she's a beacon of love and care, willing to shine her light on any that will accept. It takes a lot to get her to open up, but when she does you'll never find a more stalwart friend.

Tags: Screenshots || Lore || Aesthetic

Ship tags: Girls in Red [U'nia/Alisaie/Lyse] || Dreaming in Blue [U'nia/Ysayle] || Void and Ash [U'nia/Flidais] || One Steppe at a Time [U'nia/Cirina] || In Menphina's Arms [U'nia x Zhloe] || Niabette (Familial U'nia/Nabette)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nabette Vairemont

Pronouns: She/Her

Gender: Cis Woman

Sexuality: Bi

Bloodline: Mixed Duskwight/Xaela

Jobs: Sage

Height: 6'11"

Short Bio: Fiercely loyal and protective of her sister to a fault, Nabette can come across as grating to those that don't know her. Energetic and good with people at face value, yet not knowing how to make that connection beyond that. Those stubborn enough to work through that will find a woman who won't throw them away for anything.

Tags: Screenshots || Lore || Aesthetic

Relationship Tags: Niabette (Familial U'nia/Nabette)

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Shyssa Ironheart

Pronouns: They/Them

Gender: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Sexuality: Pan

Bloodline: Hyur (when alive), Android now

Jobs: Nightblade [NTB] (a mix of Gladiator and Samurai)

Height: 5'10"

Short Bio: Once a technician and enforcer in the Allagan Empire, a tragic accident almost took their life. On the last thread of that life, their partner put them into life support for nearly a year while she laboured to research soul transference. Reaching a breakthrough, Shyssa's soul was taken from their nearly dead body and placed into an android recreation of them, staying powered until the Allagan Empire crumbled in the wake of the Calamity of Earth. Repowered for the first time in multiple eras, rebuilt by the wishes of she who bears the soul Shyssa once did, they now explore a world so different from the one they knew, trying to find a purpose.

Tags: Screenshots || Lore || Aesthetic

Relationship Tags: Weaponized Waltz (Allagan Era) || Honey B/Shyssa (Current)

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A'vyra Mitu

Pronouns: He/She/They (in that order)

Gender: GNC Cis Man

Sexuality: Gay

Bloodline: Mixed Seeker/Keeper Miqo'te

Jobs: MCH, GNB, BSM, CRP

Height: 4'11"

Short Bio: Explosive. A word with many meanings, and all of which apply to A'vyra. She bursts with energy, both on and off the battlefield, and his voice matches in volume. He's often first to act and last to leave, willing to give himself up to buy time for his friends. To know A'vyra is to know unrelenting support, and unwavering devotion.

Tags: Screenshots || Lore || Aesthetic

Relationship Tags: The Soldier and the Poet [A'vyra/Alphinaud]

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Oketra

Pronouns: She/Her

Gender: Cis Woman

Sexuality: Aro/Ace

Bloodline: Mixed Rava Viera/Raen Au Ra

Jobs: BLM, NIN, DNC

Height: 6'

Short Bio: Prickly and standoffish to those that don't know her, and often to those that do, Oketra seems to most as just another asshole in the world. Yet to those she's close to, that deign to look beyond that, see a woman who cares fervently for any and everyone she may come across. She just doesn't always show it how you'd expect.

Tags: Screenshots || Lore || Aesthetic

Relationship Tags: [I haven't come up with them yet. But they're Oketra/Cymet and Oketra/Krile]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Misc ship tags: Synastry [Ancients] || Beneath the Waterfall [War of the Magi]

[our-oriented-aroace-experience]

I know I'm definitely 100% ace, but I'm not so sure about the aro part. I feel like I can see myself in a fulfilling romantic relationship, but, at the same time, I think I'd be good without one too. and I know that sounds pretty normal, but, I'm disconnected from the idea of romance itself too. what even is romantic attraction? I mean, I know what it is, but, how would you define it the same way you can define sexuality, and differentiate aces from allosexuals? I know I've felt it before, which means, if anything, I'm arospec, but, I'm not entirely sure when it started yk. I've never felt romantic attraction before becoming really good friends with the person, but, that's probably on everyone I know being either annoying or an asshole. I think I'm capable of developing crushes without knowing the person that well, so, probably not demiromantic. but maybe im recipromantic? I do remember the feelings getting considerably stronger after they were reciprocated. but, that could also be my attachment/abandonment issues. it wouldn't be a huge part of my identity either way, so, I'm not really freaking out about it- but I'd like to understand myself better. I know it's stupid asking a stranger for help regarding something only I can figure out, but, what do you think? am I arospec, an allo with issues, or is this related to being ace? should I just step aside and let time do its thing? do you know anyone who's gone through this sorta thing before who could maybe help? that's all, sorry for the rant; I just really needed to get it off my chest seeing as I've been suppressing these thoughts for a good two years now due to being a hopeless romantic as well. it's one thing being ace and trans, but a whole other thing also being arospec. I think I'm scared someone will find out and just assume I'm incapable of feeling romantic attraction. I'm not. I crave it, a little. I just don't actively seek it for a multitude of reasons. god, I hope I'm not actually as unlovable as I feel. anywho, have a good one <3

Am I arospec, an allo with issues, or is this related to being ace? Should I just step aside and let time do its thing?

I'm not sure. From what you wrote in your ask, it sounds like you're romance-indifferent. You may be arospec, or you may not be. Romance indifference is related to aromanticism, but is still its own thing.

I don't know if you already figured it out by the time I post this, but I personally let time do its thing when I was figuring out I was aromantic. Things happened and one day, it just clicked for me. (You're your own person though - do what you think will work best for you.)

Do you know anyone who's gone through this sorta thing before who could maybe help?

I don't know anyone who's gone through this, but if any of my followers want to chime in, then feel free to!

(I don't have much else to add)

[inevitably-ineffable-husbands]

A Thought on AziraCrow from an A-Spec Perspective

On the Eve of Good Omens S2, I just wanted to put my two cents in about AziraCrow, before we see the outcome of S2, because it’s pretty clear from trailers and promotions that their relationship is a plot point in the season.

I started writing a ridiculously long post a week ago spurned on from this screenshot from Pride Magazine, and my being upset by the current discourse on Twitter about AziraCrow “being canon or not”, but decided to shorten it to just this little thought, because I feel like me writing a meta-style commentary (which I do have saved if you want a more long-form thought about it after the series airs) isn’t necessary right now.

And this is all despite Gaiman AND the cast AND crew basically confirming that it is in multiple interviews, discourse from people in the community that are supposed to understand the queer experience, completely disavowing its legitimacy unless “X” happens (where “x” usually is explicit confirmation of sex happening) so therefore it’s not valid (which is really bizarre).

But I digress.

This is just a bit of a thought that I think allos are COMPLETELY skimming over:

Crowley’s and Aziraphale’s relationship, as it currently stands now prior to S2, is representative of the beginnings of a (currently) queerplatonic asexual relationship, and as an ace who so desperately just wants to see a relationship that I can see myself in on screen, and lo and behold came Good Omens. I’m part of a demographic which I and a few of my real-life friends fall into and were so happy to see on-screen when we saw GO. A demographic that is ridiculously under-represented in media that it often is mistaken as “bromance” or “just besties”.

As it stands now, in act 1, it is the part before the romantic gestures and before the “I love you”’s, and the part before the moving in and committing your life to someone else. Very gentle and romantic, slow burn kind of stuff that I, as an ace, relate to so much.  

This relationship looks like what my best friends went through for YEARS before finally tying the knot in their queerplatonic relationship because they couldn’t imagine their lives without each other anyway and they loved each other fiercely. This relationship looks like the kind of relationship that doesn’t turn me off as an asexual: to share the ridiculous amounts of love I have, and be loved in return, despite my complete disinterest in having sex. The “you go to fast for me Crowley” was SO FELT in my soul as someone who needs a lot of time to feel comfortable in any relationship I’m in (like, Aziraphale is SO me, it’s ridiculous really), and me trying to explain to people that I need a lot of time to feel comfortable in a relationship and that sex may never happen, and me knowing that I’ll probably be turned down because of it. Me not wanting to hurt someone in a world where sex is an expected endgame, so I just... tend to keep to myself. I’m just as happy with my books and my video games and doing things on my own, but I long for a life partner to love and to experience my life with. And while can’t speak for what other aces and aros may relate to about the relationship, I like to hope that they can also see themselves in AziraCrow as well. 

And please don’t get me wrong: I WANT them together-together, in any or all ways that it means: committing to each other 100%, love confessions, declarations of forever, marriage, a cottage in Sussex, and yes, even sex if that’s who they are canonically... I do want that, because I want it for myself. I want to see a relationship blossom where sex isn’t the primary outcome of it, but more of an afterthought as a way to consummate their love and to FEEL loved by each other.

I think the beauty of Crowley and Aziraphale’s relationship is that because they are essentially supernatural beings, we as people can put ourselves in their places, and use them as placeholders for us to project our relationships and experiences onto them and in turn feel seen. 

AziraCrow gives me hope that I will find my Other Person someday, because there is unconditional love in the world for people like me, especially as I get older and more set in my ways. I only hope I find my own Crowley to make me feel loved.

I know my opinion isn’t popular about AziraCrow, but honestly, their relationship, and the way it’s progressing means SO much to me, as an asexual, anyway. I hope it’s important to others too. <3

[eridanidreams]

Sunday Snippet

tagging: @bearlytolerant, @silurisanguine, @aro-pancake, @fangbangerghoul, @atonalginger, @aislingdmdt, @fshenkoescape, @ninjaofnaps, @lisa-and-shadow, @a-cosmic-elf, @thatsgoodsquishy0, @hockeydemon42, @fomagranfalloon, @violenceandviolets, @therealgchu, @staticpallour, @artemis-crimson, and @constellation2330

Tags are friendly, as usual--post if you want, read if you want!

from *stars through my fingers like grains of sand*

Sam swung back and forth in his chair, staring at the two slates lying haphazardly on the console—both needing to be dealt with, and neither one calculated to make him feel good about the world. He picked up one of the slates with the same care he'd give an alien beast with far too many teeth, even though he already knew what it said.

From: Daniel Blake To: Sam Coe You have a good eye. Your friend's shaping up to be a fine Ranger—she's got smarts and guts and her heart's in the right place. Problem is, she's stepped in something that's way too big for her. You know what happened out on Andromas III. Hell, you were there—God knows Pryce was bitching up a storm about you asking for classified information—but the way I figure it, you had cause. Point being, you know someone's gunning for Rangers. Emma tells me you helped take down the First on Montara Luna, so you also know about the bank robbery being just a distraction for something bigger. And Lynch is right in the middle of it. She'll follow that case wherever it leads her—I know the type. Hell, I was the type. And right now, fifty years of experience is telling me that whoever she finds at the end of that trail ain't going to go down easily, and they ain't going to go down quietly. Don't know if she told you, but she made a damned good point about Rangers going off solo after the Mosquera thing. Problem is, that applies to her, too, and right now there's no other Ranger I can peel off to partner with her. And I sure as hell can't rein in the rest of my hotheads if I'm not doing the same to the damn rookie. Which brings me to you. I know why you left. You weren't real happy even before Cora was born, what with Lillian pushing you into all those ugly undercover jobs. Emma told her it was going to backfire on her, but she just wouldn't listen. And you were even less happy sitting behind a desk, even if it gave you all the time with little Cora that you could want. Things have changed, Sam. And it may stick in both our craws to have to admit it, but you're needed. Lynch needs someone who can be the eyes in the back of her head when she's got the bit in her teeth, and someone willing to do what it takes to protect her. You were always good at bringing a partner back home. And hell, you're practically glued to her back already. I won't lie, we lost a good man when you stepped down. And I won't pretend that it wouldn't make me a happy man to see you put the badge back on. But it ain't about me. There's a bigger picture here. Think about it. P.S. Tell Lynch the answer to her question is Diego.

Sam swore under his breath. Anyone else, he'd just wipe the slate and be done with it, but Blake—he respected that old man. The only reason he'd gotten out of the Rangers as easily as he had was because Blake hadn't opposed it. Had quietly unruffled some feathers behind the scenes, most like. He owed the man, whether the Marshal knew it or not. But did he owe him that much?

He tossed the slate back on the console. That one only threatened to upend his life; the other would definitely upend Cait's. Again. He let out a heavy sigh. She tried so hard, but she was struggling under the weight of power and the shadow of her past—Jesus, even his love was a burden on her sometimes, and that broke his goddamned heart every time he saw it happen. He wanted to sit on the news for awhile, until she was a little less overwhelmed—but she'd made it crystal clear how she felt about him trying to protect her from herself. And she wasn't wrong to feel that way, even if it made that primitive little part of his brain gibber in frustration.

He snatched the second slate up, re-reading it to make sure he hadn't missed anything.

From: Ari Miller To: Sam Coe I looked into that matter we discussed last week. Discreetly. While officially we don't have access to UC records, there's always the unofficial channels. Sooner or later everyone asks the Clinic for help, and we keep good records. Thing is, New Atlantis doesn't tend to get hit by xenodiseases. The native microbial life is different enough that it hasn't gotten a foothold in Earth-descended plants and animals—knock wood—and their spaceport's had top-of-the-line biosensors since before the Colony War—well, with all their xenowarfare experiments, that's no surprise. Anyway, according to my source, the Well does have fairly frequent breakouts of disease, but they're mutated Earth bugs. There's nothing that would suggest a cover-up—no unexplained gaps, no data that's too clean, nothing. The records are legit—there was no xenodisease in New Atlantis, in or out of the Well, between 2310 and 2315. Sorry to come up dry, and best of luck in your investigation!

Sam tapped the edge of the slate against his palm, thinking hard, then tucked it into his jacket. The problem was that they had so little to go on—Cait's memories had been tortured into unreliability, and the best guess anyone had was sometime around the end of the war. It looked as if the answers they needed were in Neon, and Sam didn't want to put Cait through that. Not now. Bad enough he was going to have to tell her that one of her foundational memories was a lie—he had no idea how she would take it.

[liyawritesss]

ᴅᴀᴛɪɴɢ ʏᴜꜱᴇɪ ꜰᴜᴅᴏ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇ...

Pairing: Fudo Yusei(YGO!5DS) x Black!Fem!Reader

Genre: Headcanons

Synopsis: What would it be like to date the Satelite Rising Star, Yusei Fudo?

Warnings: pre + post grand prix headcanons

A/N: Meet my childhood crush, yall.... there is absolutely no demand for this man. Literally none, but its 10pm and i was reminded of my love for this series from going to c2e2 last weekend. So. If I have to reminisce, I'm taking

Yusei is one of the guys that literally every girl wants; He’s kind, compassionate, and has an unnerving drive for justice and equality for his people.

Yusei is the kind of guy who’s comically nervous about asking someone out

It’s not like he had any examples of healthy romantic relationships, or any relationships at all for that matter, growing up in the Satelite. He was more focused on survival since it was every man for himself in that literal trash heap

He may attempt to reach out to Martha for some advice, but it would not help in the long run considering her views are a bit...outdated.

He’s not going to Crow or Jack, that is out of the question - they can’t even take care of themselves.

The twins’ view on love and relationships is more refreshed for the times but still, with no offense intended, childish

The only person he virtually had left to even think about asking for help was Akiza, who, like in any cliche case, just told him to ‘be himself’

With virtually no other option the boy asked you out for a night-time ride. It was the only ‘romantic’ thing he could come up with, so he was glad that you enjoyed it regardless

Dating Yusei requires lots of patience, not just because he’s always working to upgrade his runner or practice new duel tactics, but because he’s just never done this before.

He’s aro-ace to me, and I think it's further backed by that one episode where Martha tries to set him and Akiza up and he's very much against the idea, because a) the world is quite literally on collapse, and b) he never sees akiza like that. He was indifferent to the idea of love and romance, having been so fixated on survival for all his life, and so he needs time to get used to the idea of caring for someone in more than just a friendly way, and vise versa

He’ll probably gift you with little things you find interest in, like flattering rocks or crystals he just so happens to pass by on his rides - “I saw this crystal-looking thing on my patrol the other night, I thought you might like it.”

Will almost always be looking for you in a crowd if he’s in a duel for encouragement and good luck. Offer him a good luck kiss on his forehead or his deck, it will calm him down (even tho he knows hes gon win regardless) while inadvertently flustering him, but he’ll promise to make the duel quick so as to not worry you

As the years go on, his priorities change. After finding out the truth of his birth parents and what happened in the Ener-D reaction incident, he opts to lay down his deck and take up his fathers unfinished research in Neo-Domino City

He misses his old life and is still in contact with friends like Crow and Jack, and often goes to visit them and you back in the satellite every once in a while

Yusei still takes you on those late night rides, and still does things to show you how much he values your relationship even after years of turmoil and the world literally almost ending like twice

Yusei is probably one of, if not the most genuine people in the world, who wants to see the good in everyone and be the person people can rely on

The one thing Yusei will ever probably ask of you is to help him zone out if he’s overwhelming himself, which he will because he’s a workaholic by blood, and needs a daring little lady to bring him down to a chill level when he’s overworked himself.

If you enjoy, please leave a like, comment, and reblog for others to see! And don't be shy to send a request!

[ronanlynchdefender]

An Asexual Reading of Gansey

A little while ago, I made a post saying Gansey should’ve been ace “because reasons” and then I decided to write a post detailing those reasons and here it is.

As someone who is ace, I think many ace-spec (and aro-spec) people conceptualize our romantic and platonic relationships differently than allo people might. When reading The Raven Cycle, I personally related to Gansey and how he thinks and feels about his friendships with the raven boys. Had Gansey been written as an asexual character, I think it would’ve added another layer of nuance to the unique ways in which he views these platonic relationships.

"What has he possibly done to deserve such a thing?" Helen demanded. "Are you sleeping with him?" Indignation cooled his voice. "Because friendship isn't worthy enough?" (The Raven King, pg. 303)

Gansey prioritizes his platonic relationships just as much as his romantic relationships. In fact, Gansey’s primary concerns in the entire series (aside from finding Glendower) are his intense (and often tumultuous) friendships. His friends are such a priority that he brides the headmaster in order to guarantee that Ronan gets his high school diploma. Helen assumes that only a romantic or sexual connection would motivate someone to do something so extreme, but Gansey pushes back on this idea. For Gansey, friendship is just as worthy and just as important as any other relationship. The words,  "just a friend," are meaningless in a Gansey world. If Richard Campbell Gansey III chooses you as his close friend, he will go to the ends of the ley line for you.

I think this is something that ace-spec and aro-spec people can relate to because we may also place higher value in our friendships just like Gansey does. Just because we don’t experience romantic or sexual feelings in the same way as everyone else, or at all, doesn’t mean we won’t still do batshit crazy things for other people.

For an ace or aro-spec person, platonic relationships can be just as strong as romantic or sexual relationships are for allo people. 

“Do you not want me to come?” Something stuck in Gansey’s throat. “I would take all of you anywhere with me.” (The Raven Boys, pg. 163)

This is just an absolutely beautiful line, and what makes it so is that Gansey truly means it. It’s so sincere and vulnerable. The things that Gansey values most in his life are his friendships, and he just wants all of them to be together forever. Besides finding Glendower, his dream in life is to literally live with all his friends in Monmouth. He begs Adam to move in with them. And I KNOW I am not the only ace-spec or aro-spec person who dreams about living in a big house with all their closest friends.

What was it about Blue? Adam was not suspicious of her, and he was suspicious of everyone. But then again, he was clearly infatuated. That, too, was unfamiliar ground for Gansey. (The Raven Boys, pg. 201)

In these couple of chapters when Adam asks Blue out with the guys and they find Cabeswater for the first time, Gansey is confused about Adam’s feelings toward Blue. There are a few interpretations: Gansey is jealous of Adam because he is attracted to Blue; Gansey is jealous of Blue because he is in love with Adam. Both of these interpretations are, of course, not mutually exclusive.

Regardless of any jealousy or attraction he may or may not be feeling in this scene, Gansey is genuinely confused because Adam liking a girl so openly is inconsistent with his perception of Adam. It is exactly as Gansey says. Adam doesn’t trust people.  To see Adam trust another person so suddenly and inexplicably in Gansey’s eyes is disconcerting to say the least.

At the door to the helicopter, Gansey looked back over his shoulder at them, his smile complicated when he saw them holding hands. (The Raven Boys, pg. 196)

Obviously, Adam has a crush on Blue, but this isn’t easy for Gansey to wrap his head around. It's easy for Gansey to conceptualize that Adam may admire this strange and quirky girl from afar at Nino's, but seeing them physically close after only 2 or 3 encounters utterly puzzles him.

I feel like a lot of ace-spec and aro-spec people can relate to the confusion around sudden attraction. We ask totally reasonable questions such as how do you know you like someone after only having one or two conversations with them?

If Gansey was written as asexual, one could interpret this scene as Gansey not understanding the nature of Adam's romantic or sexual attraction to Blue. It would not be Adam’s crush that puzzles Gansey but also the idea of crushes altogether.

[Side note: Just imagine a version of Raven Boys where Gansey is lamenting the downfall of his queerplatonic relationship with Adam because Adam has a crush on a girl. It’s not even too far off from what actually happens in the books. Lmao]

“We’re friends at once, we would instantly do what friends would do for each other. Not just pals. Friends. Blood brothers. You just feel it. We instead of you and me. That’s jeong.” Gansey was aware on a certain level that the description was melodramatic, heightened, illogical. But on a deeper level, it felt true, and familiar, and like it explained much of Gansey’s life. It was how he felt about Ronan and Adam and Noah and Blue. With each of them, it had felt instantly right: relieving. Finally, he thought, he’d found them. We instead of you and me. (The Raven King, pg. 360)

How interesting that Gansey bonds with Henry Cheng, The Raven Cycle’s most aroace-coded character, about the concept of platonic soulmates. This point is pretty self-explanatory. I feel like a lot of ace and aro-spec people relate to the concept of platonic soulmates.

In conclusion, I think making Gansey asexual could’ve added another layer of nuance to the already nuanced relationships he has with all of the members of the gangsey. While it is evident in certain scenes that Gansey was not intended to be an ace-coded character, I still resonate with the ways Gansey feels about his relationships.

Also, I know I wrote about ace and aro-spec people in general for this post, but this is mainly from my own personal perspective so obviously the points I make are not necessarily representative of the entire community.

If any other aces (or aros) are reading this, let me know if you relate or if this is just a me thing. I’m curious to hear what other people think about this topic.

[redysetdare]

I'm sure I've brought this up before but I feel a lot more confident in it now but I'm pretty sure that I do not experience attraction, period. at least, i do not feel like i experience any emotion or feeling that can be called attraction.

Attraction just feels like such a foreign thing to me because every i try to understand it it just becomes lost on me. I can understand when someone is pretty, but i see people being pretty or handsome in the same way that i see a flower is pretty or a sunset is pretty. i do not think there is any attraction involved in that at all. I think the closest I've probably gotten to a feeling of attraction would be when i see buff women; but tbh i feel that admiration fits better than attraction in that case.

idk I just have been thinking a lot about attraction lately and how i always found myself confused on the idea of platonic attraction or aesthetic attraction because while i do like having friends and while i do find people pretty, i wouldn't call the feelings i have towards these things attraction. I'm not attracted to what i find aesthetically pleasing. I'm not attracted to any friends or people i may want to be friends with (Which the friend thing is a whole can of worms for another post with it's own nuances).

Some people may say "No you are feeling attraction, you're describing attraction" but genuinely i feel like i may not be. every time people have tried to explain it to me it never feels right. or the word feels wrong for what they are describing. People describe it as "Wanting" but that doesn't always work with other split attractions.... like people wanting to be friends is platonic attraction but....what is there to want with aesthetic attraction???? familial attraction???? same with descriptions of other attractions, everyone just has an explanation that doesn't click in my brain as something i feel.

and this isn't me bashing on people who feel attraction - I know feelings can be incredibly vague and difficult to explain and me not understanding isn't me calling it stupid or fake. It's more just me not being able to grasp something because I do not feel it. Similar to how i don't fully understand romance as an aro person who just...doesn't feel it.

idk there's no point to this post other than rambling on about attraction. I feel like it isn't discussed as much as it should be in aspec spaces. most people stop at romantic and sexual attraction but not much is explored past that point in terms of the SAM or even just the world attraction in general. Like....for a community that is built up of a lot of identities expressing the lack of attraction it's strange how we kinda don't explore the idea of attraction more outside of just...romantic or sexual...

[aroace-confessions]

i love this community, i really do, but it drives me crazy how many people refuse to accept that they may have been wrong about their sexuality. instead of going "huh, i seem to be attracted to people in a way i wasn't before, maybe i'm actually bi/gay instead of ace" they'll say "oh, obviously this means i'm aroflux demisexual" because they've built their entire personality around being aro/ace and don't know who they are without it. i was on ye olde internet back when asexual just meant "no attraction, period" and it's frustrating to see people constantly shift the goal posts so that they never have to admit that maybe a different sexuality fits them better now. and believe me i understand, i used to call myself a bisexual prude before i learned about asexuality, and it was hard to let go of a label that i was attached to for so long. but you know what? everything turned out fine. the bisexual community still welcomed me, my bi friends were completely accepting, and i got to join a whole new community too!

at the risk of sounding like an old fart, remember kids: labels are supposed to bring people together, not separate them. and in my experience, the more specific a label, the more lonely it is.

Submitted 30/03/24

[thebroccolination]

Make Sure to Double-Check Labels

I've seen this phenomenon a lot in Thai BL fandom over the years, so I just wanted to make a very gentle post to encourage people to always check their sources before using a sexuality label for anyone.

If someone hasn't given a label, I think it's best to respect that. Please don't give them one.

If your favorite actor is a cis man who presents himself with a feminine flair and has previously dated men, you may see people referring to him as gay. But before you follow suit, please look into whether he's actually used that label for himself.

There's a very fine line you can walk thinking, "Oh, but I can tell," before you jazz-hands yourself into the world of stereotyping.

My go-to example for this is Earth ("Cooheart"). My information might be out of date, but the only label I've ever heard directly from him was on an Instagram live where, if I'm remembering correctly, someone asked if he's gay. He said he's "LGBT." Yet, there are scores of fans who have been casually calling him "gay" for years ever since before I joined the fandom. Maybe he is, maybe he isn't. Maybe he used that term at some point. But as far as I know, he hasn't, so I just call him queer. (And that's only because calling a person all four letters of "LGBT" isn't something we do in English. It's more commonly used in Thai as a loan word to mean "queer" from what I've been told by friends who speak Thai.)

A more recent example is Supanut. In an interview, he said he dated a girl he met online when he was about thirteen or so, then he dated a boy when he realized boys could feel attraction to each other, and then later a man. Supanut didn't use a label for himself, and yet people have started calling him "Bi King." There are plenty of gay people who have dated other genders for various reasons, there are ace and aro people who realized their orientations later. The point is, unless Supanut himself gives a label, the fact that he dated a girl, a boy, and a man only means that he dated a girl, a boy, and a man.

On the other side of the labeling, Krist is called straight pretty universally, likely because he blew up on an IG story once and denied being gay after people kept harassing him to come out as Singto's boyfriend. However, as far as I or any of the long-term fans I've spoken with about it know, Krist has never used any label for his sexuality. The closest I've seen are when he answers "what's your type of girl" questions and the time he said something like, "If I ever date a man, I'll be open about it because I want my fans to know that part of my life," so he seems openminded more than anything specific.

Then you've got Prem who once said in an interview (paraphrasing) that he never thought of dating men before he worked in BL, but now he doesn't care about gender when considering romantic partners. But, as far as I know, he's never used a label.

I've noticed that a lot of Thai actors are private about the labels they use—if they use any! There are a fair number of queer actors, and friends living in Thailand have said that that information is more commonly known among domestic fans, but whether or not it becomes information for the global public to have is up to each individual actor to decide.

Years ago, Fluke Natouch used the label "gay" for himself in an interview about his casting in Until We Meet Again. If I'm remembering correctly, he asked New (the director) if him being openly gay would be an issue when promoting the series. Presumably he was concerned because the agency he'd just left wanted him to be more discreet about his sexuality, and he's been independent ever since.

Even now, sexuality is still a very difficult thing to navigate, especially if you're young or in the spotlight or part of a widely conservative culture. The internet is rife with misinformation, so always, always make sure to check your sources. Unfortunately, we can't just trust that everyone is doing their due diligence, and I think it's an act of true kindness and deep respect to make sure your facts about people are in order before you speak of them. Especially when you're in someone else's cultural backyard, and especially when their safety and mental health can be so easily compromised by what people say about and to them.

NOTE: I used the above examples based on what I know. It's entirely likely there's additional nuance and context in every case, so if you have additional resources, please link them! It can be difficult to stay on top of things in a language you're still in the very beginning stages of learning, so if we can help each other, we'll be better off than trying to keep up-to-date on our own.