#have I been freaking out bc I don’t understand straight ppl? very much so | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nikadd · 10 months

Text

gonna complain abt biphobia for a second so if you think im automatically annoying bc of that it’s ok, just scroll past. idgaf

for the past few weeks on twitter and in the past on tiktok and im assuming here as well (im just not verging into those waters on here) i’ve seen a lot of weird and annoying things being said abt bisexuals and bi women in general and it feels like one of those things where somebody picks a specific type of a member in a community (here being “a white cis bi girl with a white cishet boyfriend”) as like the so called representative of the entire community and bc it’s like the supposed closest person to being the oppressor then all of the criticisms get to stick. it’s like when ppl add “white” in front of “woman” to make their criticisms not sound misogynistic.

like there are lots of things that are very much issues that bisexuals face in higher numbers than either gay or straight ppl do (such as ipv, for example), and nobody is talking abt it, but if we ever just express annoyances abt micro aggressions or negative stereotypes abt us (that feed into the material oppression we face! the stereotypes abt us being sex-obsessed and promiscuous freaks actually does lead to ppl thinking we can’t say no to sex and that we would cheat on them which leads to physical and emotional abuse!), then suddenly everybody is like “why are yall complaining abt it” “i wish i had your issues” “biphobia isn’t real, what you’re complaining abt is homophobia” “yall chose to date men” “who’s stopping yall from dating men” and it’s like…

we (cis bi women) understand that if we are dating men or somebody who is read as a man on the street then we benefit from being read as straight, but it’s weird when ppl keep talking abt “the real life” when we are talking abt how we are treated within the queer community or we want to address specific things. like many of us DO understand the sense of scale of things, we are not equating homophobic hate crimes to the micro aggressions, but if everything we say is conflated to just being micro aggressions we are blowing out of proportion, then it becomes difficult to address actually important things!

and i do think some of my fellow bisexuals have fallen into a weird pick-me-girl meme within the community, e.g. “i’m attracted to every woman ever and like 3 guys” which sounds like we are supposed to suppress our attraction to men to feel accepted in the queer community and act like it’s such a chore to be attracted to or be in a relationship w men. and im not even talking abt many of them coming to realize they are lesbians, which is good for them! but it just became one of those annoying things ppl just regurgitate and i don’t actually believe that it is an actual way many of them view their attraction, but they want the good queer points so they say it.

and i understand many lesbians’ frustrations w newly-out bi women expressing how they are intimidated by the idea of approaching a woman, but i think sometimes ppl are too quick to call it lesbophobia and that we think that lesbians are scary bc THEN apparently we aren’t living in “the real life” in our heteronormative world where we are taught how to be w men only? like i guess in this situation we don’t care abt what goes on outside of the community. and im glad many queer women are able to overcome it but we often forget how difficult it is to figure it out! and ppl online keep talking abt how weird and homophobic it is for bi women to say this when we should actually be scared of/intimidated by men bc they are more likely to abuse us… which is such a piss on the poor type of misreading of what we are saying. but also victim blaming once again.

like i’ve been out as bi for like 9 years now, had VERY strong feelings for multiple girls over this time (like i’ve had to tell some ppl im bi and not a lesbian), currently in my first ever relationship - and yes it’s with a man. and if i was some kind of famous person on the internet, people would be saying im settling, or im faking my queerness, or looking into my past relationships and seeing nothing there bc ive never dated anybody before. so what then? suddenly im not bi bc i’ve never gone out w a girl? like in my case i never even dated men before bc i rarely like somebody enough to want to go through w anything AND i need to know that they like me first as well so im actually always surprised to find out that ppl date ppl often but that’s neither here nor there.

like all those tweets abt billie eilish abt how she “chose to date an abuser before she ever dated a girl” or dove cameron “making a song abt being a better boyfriend to a girl and now dating yet another man” make me so upset like do they need to go out and date a girl for some kind of queer points for ppl to shut up abt it?

another thing i saw was like “a girl is gonna go to a queer bar or pride, dance and flirt with girls, and then go home to a boyfriend 💀” and it’s like okay so yall don’t want us bringing our boyfriends to queer events, that’s fine (not that my bf is straight and might also enjoy going to a queer event as he’s also queer but who cares abt that, right?) but then we also can’t go to a queer event by ourselves either? like not all queer events are singles-only events! and flirting doesn’t mean you’re being led on! sometimes ppl flirt just because! why does it mean that i need to stop going to queer events that i’ve been going to before dating my bf just bc im w a man now?

like ppl act like it’s not even worth to come out for a bi woman if she’s gonna date a guy / already is in a relationship w a guy. like maybe my identity existed before my relationship and might even exist after it? like im my own person or something?

like i’m so tired of ppl online being “heartbroken” over a hot woman (bonus points if she “looks” gay) being w a man - as if you ever had a chance w her if she was single! or acting like being w a bi woman means that she’s gonna leave you for a man! like it sounds weirdly incelish when i see other queer women online being like “oh ofc a girl i was dating left me for a man 🙄” and it’s like maybe she just started dating a man after you but you’re making it sound like she hated being with a woman and cheated on you with a man and you get to have this high horse about it. like im sure there have been instances where two women broke up and then one ended up w a man and even got married or something but i’ve seen too many ppl paint these situations like ultimate betrayals. like if she left you for another woman it would have been better?

like i know that there are some bi women who Have said/done things that led to these thoughts/complaints, but like the way we (queer women as a whole) have been engaging in these conversations has been very alienating. like there ARE things we need to address within our community (e.g., “everybody is a little bi”, “hearts not parts”, “don’t worry i’m bisexual” when dating trans ppl, etc) but i genuinely often feel more comfortable talking to other bisexuals abt it bc i think some things SHOULD be addressed within the bisexual community first bc it shouldn’t be on other ppl to address these things like we gotta clean our own house yk but it’s often difficult to do so on the internet bc anybody could chime in and divert the attention and take things out of context.

tldr i hate these conversations and all the jokes abt biphobia bc ppl think it makes them more progressive or feminist or whatever and seriously addressing these things suddenly makes me “one of those bisexuals” or whatever. like i know im saying all the stuff we’ve all already said in 2014 in all those “reblog if you believe that bi ppl are bi and not just half gay half straight” but i feel like ppl only agree w this in theory and not in practice and actively believe that every bi woman is a lesbian in denial or a straight woman w a fetish. and it’s fucking annoying.

and yeah it might sound like i’m a chronically online tumblr sjw abt it but the internet queer spaces are like a third space for many ppl and it’s disheartening to see these things and then feel like ppl are just keeping their mouths shut abt it offline but still believe and think this way.

…AND THATS ALL JUST ABT BI CIS WHITE WOMEN.

#it's valeriia talking #bi tag #long post for ts #would love to hear other bi ppl’s thoughts in the replies #decided not to let ppl reblog it bc im tired.

13 notes · View notes

asmolemmeeatyouout · 4 years

Text

The Boys With an Autistic MC HC !! (SFW !)

(aka I’m projecting bc sad) (I also have adhd so there will be adhd moments)

Lucifer:

This boy has so much work yet he still find the time to help you put together a routine

WILL make sure you stick to it

He will rearrange the entire school if it will help you

If any demon and I mean ANY demon is even the slightest bit mean to you they go mysteriously missing the next day

Sometimes he infantilises you but he doesn’t mean to, tell him to cut it out and the shame will rip through him

In line with that you will probably find him cutting the crusts off your sandwiches and rearranging your stuffies, up to you if you want him to stop that (I hate crusts and my teddies deserve to be comfortable too)

Makes sure you’re accommodated everywhere in the devildom not just rad and and the hol

One day you realise his suit jacket? Perfect fabric for stimming

He starts dressing according to the fabrics you like

Let’s you hold his sleeve arm when talking bc it’s a good stim

Will put his jacket on you when you’re overwhelmed and need some familiarity

You start to associate his smell with safety

Mammon:

Pretends he doesn’t care

Treats you the most normal out of all the brothers

Has actually memorised your routine and knows your stressors/meltdown/shutdown triggers

White knights you very subtly

You think demons are very accepting in the devildom but in reality mammon does the same as luci but his approach is much more ‘stop it before it starts’

Buys you stimmies bc he loves the way you look when you’re happy stimming (yes BUYS not steals)

Too embarrassed to give you them so they just appear in your room

He’s just coincidentally in the hallway when you come rushing out to show people

You eventually realise it’s gotta be him bc he’s always there when you find em so you just start running directly to him

Loves it if you have echolalia

Tries to get you to repeat ‘the great mammon’ as much as possible

If he finds you repeating words/beeping at the microwave he will engage and do the same until you happy stim (then he will try get you to repeat ‘mc’s first man the great mammon’

If you start calling him that ?! The boy will melt. (I get intense echolalia with ‘mammonie’ and i think he would straight up die hearing mc go ‘mammonie mammonie mammonie’

After all it makes sense that the great mammon is constantly on your mind

Levithian:

Another nerd ?! Heck yeah!! !

Very glad you aren’t a normie

Perhaps relates the most to your experience against the allistics as ppl don’t like him bc he’s a ‘yucky okatu’

Loves when you talk about a special interest (SI) because you’re just as obsessive as he is

Will try and get you obsessed with anime and manga if you aren’t already

Is a shut in so he gets that people are overwhelming and scary at times

Is uncharacteristically vulnerable and open with you bc he feels like you understand his existence at a deeper level

If you like squishes (and show him first) he will start asking for the deep pressure hugs when he feels he needs them

But ofc bc you’re both you, the method for asking is just repeating the word squish over and over while you hug

Eye contact !? Oh hell no

Most of your conversations are done facing away from each other

Asmodeus:

Same clothes? Comfort items? No no no no no you gotta look beautiful like you are!

Does not entirely get it at first, how can anyone want to wear something more than once?

Once you explain it he will drag you shopping (to high end shops, using avoiding crowds as an excuse to pamper you) to find a signature, beautiful, comfortable and easy to put on outfit for you to wear

He will then buy 30 of them just in case you lose anything

He WILL give you presents randomly after you told him you like to wear clothing with emotional significance

Bonding time includes decorating your ear defenders and sunglasses

If your SI is anything to do with fashion or beauty or just asmo things in general this boy will NEVER leave your side. You become the only person he wants to talk to

If you excited stim by bouncing, hand flapping or squealing he is right there with you creating a feedback loop of excited stimming

When he finds out you like routine he will check you’re doing the beauty routine he made for you every night

If you’re too tired he will do it for you (or even if you just ask he loves being close to you)

If you’re touch repulsed he will ask every time before he even gets close to you (EVERY DAMN TIME ! This man understands consent and the fact that some days touch is too much others it’s not)

Satan:

Acts like lucifer visa the routine n rad but with no infantilising

Reads every study ever done on autism and neurodivergence ever

ANGOR at human world autism studies bc they’re dumb and there’s so much more interesting things to investigate to do with being autistic

He does go to the human world and he does stab a$$ and those involved

If you let him he will study you

Tracks your sleep, eating habits, and mood regulation (after he asks ofc)

Meltdowns? No that’s a regular day in Satan’s head

He lets you use his rage room (he definitely has a room exclusively for smashing stuff) if you feel even a little stressed

Likes talking about your SI’s with you bc it’s rare he finds someone so knowledgeable on a subject

Beelezebub:

The kindest most patient boy

Helps you find foods that don’t mess with your texture issues

Checks to make sure you’ve eaten in case you’ve been distracted and not realised you’re hungry

Doesn’t understand AFRID because food is good?? But is willing to help you with it (see previous points)

Stims with you because it makes you happy

Will let you info dump for hours even if he doesn’t get it

Is generally very warm so he makes the perfect person for squishes

Perfectly happy to just sit in silence and not talk or make eye contact

Belphagor:

Definitely understands the exhaustion that comes with being disabled

If you even look overstimulated he will kidnap you for a nap (whether than be physically or if you’re touch repulsed he will fake an emergency (the emergency is you being over stim Ed) just to get u out, it’s the only thing he puts effort into)

Shares his secret super soft blanket stash bc you are the only one who can appreciate how freaking soft the texture is

Best person to look after you in a shutdown bc he kinda gets it

Gets his own ear defenders and sunglasses so he can sleep in class (claims it’s solidarity with you)

Just enjoys your company like his bro so ditto on the silence thing

(There’s more I can think of but this is already really long, comment if u want part 2)

#obey me #satan obeyme #obey me asmo #asmodeus hc #obey me levithian #obey me mammon #lucifer obey me #beelezebub obey me #belphagor obey me #obey me hc #headcanons #actuallyautistic #adhd #obey me autistic #obey me x reader #autistic mc #autisticmc

322 notes · View notes

causticsunshine · 3 years

Note

Okay I agree with your post SO MUCH and I’ve been wanting to scream about this for so long but have not had an outlet so I’m going to have a very brief freak out in ur inbox (for which I’m sorry and feel free to delete lmao) but I have a big beef with people reactions to their tour outfits. I’m gonna be honest I didn’t vibe suuuper hard with either of their wardrobes for the most part (I mean they looked great obviously but not a ton of diversity but it’s whatever still very cute) but when Harry was one tour literally every single show I would see 10-15 posts berating him and Harry L for styling him in the same type of outfit night after night, but when Louis went on tour and wore black jeans and a T-shirt night after night those same people were all over my dash screaming about how sexy he looked and the punk rock vibes and how great the outfit was and how his style is unmatched etc etc etc. and like I’m not saying this to try and hate on Louis at all bc I don’t have anything against the outfits but they were a bit basic, and yet suddenly all these people didn’t care abt wearing the same kind of thing over and over and literally every other complaint they had and were singing his praises constantly and it was just SO DIFFERENT to how people reacted to Harry. Sorry this is so long I’m just MAD lol and also I think this sounds kinda negative but it’s nothing against h or l just some of the ppl talking abt them.

you go ahead and yell all you want my dude, i hear you!

and i totally get where you're coming from, like i'll fully admit i had a similar reaction to you in regards both of their tour fits—for the most part. some of harry's i really loved, but otherwise i was kinda like 'mm okay' although i did understand after tour (good one, @ me) that the whole uniform look was kind of the vision/intention. and with louis so far, it's been like '...yeah that's just. that's just how he dresses sometimes lmao' but the shorts look at my show did take me by surprise just because it was windy and cold as shit on the 7th and even wearing joggers with a flannel and letterman over the crop tank i was wearing i was freezing my tits off until the show started (like louis has said numerous times over the years that he gets cold easily and since last august has performed multiple times in long sleeves and long pants, so to be in the pacific northwest in march and in shorts and a t-shirt was like.... ok was this part of odds or are you somehow suddenly boiling??)

and i think because harry's so much more involved in more dressy ✨ Fashion ✨ scene while louis' tour looks so far have been more about comfort with the little influences of streetwear brands he fancies and footie shirts, referential graphic tees, people were harsher on harry because 'well we spent all this time getting hyped up about the tour 'fits only for it to be this' like.... admittedly i did think that at first too but that doesn't make it okay in any sense? like it's what he wanted to do and that's really what what matters! like i'd much rather he or anyone else performing, especially considering people who're also known for having a foot in the fashion pool, be comfortable and able to move around in whatever they please rather than being itchy or overheated or unable to move around just to look fancy.

but yeah.... people making all this commentary about louis' looks for the most part—and so far, like we got a bit to go still, haha—when girl he's in a t-shirt or long sleeve and jeans, he just looks like that (and he looks GOOD but like. that all came straight from that man's closet lmao), after they shat on H and harry l for being repetitive and 'simple' and all this shit because 'he should be doing more'.....

hypocrisy seems to be a real overarching character trait with this ugly favoritism nonsense, huh 🤔🤔

#anon #answered

6 notes · View notes

mha-adore · 4 years

Note

hey! ty sm for doing the matchup exchange with me, i look forward to writing your match! i’m rita and i go by she/her pronouns. i have a preference for men & i’m 16. my quirk would be similar to shinso & inumaki from jjk,, i can control ppl and animals just by saying a command,,, an indicator for when i’m using my quirk would be my eyes changing color & a side effect to using my quirk would be getting light headed.

i’m a libra sun, aquarius moon, & leo rising. a slytherin & intj-t. i’m v polite and reserved when you first meet me. i’m pretty introverted and i have anxiety. it takes me while to open up since it takes me a while to trust ppl. i do tend to get annoyed and angry by others easily,, i’m a bit of a hot head. i’m pretty chill and like joking around once i open up,, i can also be kinda dumb. i’m a bit of a loner and i don’t have many friends. i’m actually a bit of an emotional person but only when it comes to shows, movies, books, etc,, i tend to keep my emotions bottled up. i’m self conscious and self critical. i care a lot about having perfect grades and getting into a good university but i’m so lazy (lots of breaks & procrastination) at the same time,, i end up getting everything done on time though. i’m impatient when it comes to my own things so i like doing things my way bc i feel more comfortable that way. i also like keeping things neat. i’ve also been told i have a resting sad face & that i’m intimidating. i wear a lot of black and i’d describe my style as dark academia mixed with 70s-90s fashion. when i’m at home i just wear comfortable clothing like pajama pants and a t-shirt.

my likes/hobbies/interests are baking, playing the sims, writing, and playing board games with ppl i’m close to. i also like relaxing in bed and spending time with people i’m close to and having fun. i’m interested in psychology, true crime, & history. i don’t like arrogant & closed minded people. i look for a partner who is loyal, kind, & open-minded. my love languages are gifts and quality time (both ways).

i hope this isn’t too much,, ty again! <3

Hey friend, it's my pleasure! Thanks sm for offering 💖

Can I just say super quick that your quirk is really cool? You could command an army of bears, raccoons or fire ants. I would be terrified. Also I'm an Aquarius moon and INTJ too, air moons gotta stay together. I totally got a Libra vibe off you when you first messaged me and you're super sweet 🎀 also I totally get you on the anxiety part, I have anxiety too. I know how terrifying it can be to reach out to new people so please know I'm proud of you for taking the chance to reach out to me 😊 and it's never too much; the more detail the better!

I match you with Shoto!

Say hi to the walking AC and heater unit. A couple reasons I picked him is because you mentioned having anxiety and being hot headed. With his father being, well, himself and his mother being the anxious person she is, Shoto understands both sides of the coin very well and knows how to deal with both parts. He can balance being calm and stern at the same time and he has the patience of a saint. He would give you the time and space you need to grow comfortable around new people and surroundings, as well he would be able to keep you grounded when your temper gets the best of you. He mellows you out. My personal headcanon is that he's a Capricorn sun, Scorpio moon, Virgo rising, Ravenclaw and INFP.

He returns your jokes with dry humor. He can keep a dead serious face while making the stupidest jokes too. He could look you dead in the eye, face straight, and rip a monster fart and not giggle just to see your reaction. Honestly the image of him holding eye contact while aggressively farting is funny in my head. I know I have the humor of a 9 year old.

He isn't bothered by you not having many friends. He's a private person and doesn't want a lot of people up in his business. He prefers few close friends over many distant friends. He knows you aren't stupid and pays no attention to anything you say that may sound dumb. He's heard so much dumb shit he learned to filter it from his brain.

He understands that you're closed off on your emotions. He really can't blame you, he's quite the same. If you get a little teary eyed over a book or movie he'll let you talk it out and cry if you'd like, but he won't push you to be uncomfortably open to him. He values your happiness over his own and doesn't mind you keeping your feelings to yourself. He respects your privacy. Regardless of what you may feel conscious or critical of about yourself he's there to remind you that you're perfect. You're healthy, you're strong and you're doing the best you can. No one could ask any more from you. He's lived a majority of his life feeling outcasted and ignored because of his scar and wouldn't wish the same on anyone, so if there's any part of you that you feel bad about he's always reminding you that you have no imperfections, everything about you makes you one of a kind. You're irreplicable.

He isn't worried about you procrastinating on studying or homework. As long as you get it done and do well enough he isn't concerned. If you ever have difficulty with a subject he's happy to help you study and learn. If you want he can ask Momo to join for a study party if you want the extra help or company. He just wants to see you succeed and get into the college of your cotton candy dreams. Oh and don't worry about your tuition, he has it covered. Don't even mention it to him it'll already be paid off, including books and living arrangements. He only wants you to pay him back by doing your best in school and showing him you can handle the hard work.

He always has a suggestion on ways you can do things but he knows you prefer to do them by yourself, so he'll neber bombard you with his ideas. If you ask for his input he has plenty to give but otherwise he gives you the room to make your own moves. He's a neat freak himself and is always happy to help you keep your room clean and well put together. He has good room decor ideas too if you want to spruce up your room.

He really doesn't see you as intimidating. He sees a confident, independent and strong young woman who can hold her own. He occasionally wonders if you're really sad or if that's just your expression and he'll occasionally ask. He's only making sure you're okay. If you're sad he's on it with a cute or funny movie, some snacks, a shoulder to cry on and a whole night's worth of stuff to talk about.

He likes your sense of fashion, he enjoys darker and warmer colors. He lives for the 80s aesthetic and loves to see you mix the two so effortlessly. He can, wants to and will give you his t shirts to wear at home. He'll also loan you hoodies and sweaters. He won't outright buy you a hoodie, he'll buy one for himself and let you get away with stealing it from him.

He's so soft for home made cookies and would love for you to make him some. Home made dinners are also great. He would love to help you bake and would enjoy baking dates. He'll also watch shows like Hell's Kitchen with you. He isn't exactly a huge gamer but he likes simulation games and RPGs like Sims, Animal Crossing, Pokemon, Harvest Moon etc. He'll binge these games with you all day and night. Your Sims have to get married to each other it's the law. He enjoys reading what you write - what you don't mind sharing of course. He won't go peeking in your personal writing, he knows it isn't his place. Concerning what you do share he'll read it with great interest and share his thoughts and any ideas he has. He would really enjoy writing something with you, like a short story or a comic. He loves how you convey your writing and would be honored to take part in it. His favorite board game is Candy Land, a close second being Monopoly, followed by Scrabble. He pulls out a big ass dictionary during Scrabble just to prove to people that he knows his vocabulary. He loves you dearly but all bets are off during Monopoly, it's a dog eat dog world and he isn't bailing you out of jail. He will, however, offer you real money in turn for properties in the game. No that isn't cheating the rules say nothing about it. He has no problem with a lazy day in bed though and wouldn't mind just dozing or watching shows together. Any time spent with you is time spent well. You two could watch paint dry together and he would have a blast. He'll buy the paint.

With his personal involvment in hero work he has lots of info on true crime cases and can share stories and books with you. He has everything from small robberies to Ted Bundy and beyond. If you have a question about a true crime case he has an answer. As for psychology I imagine he would study it himself, perhaps as a secondary career or freelance hobby. He'll examine characters from books and movies with you and run his own behavioral analysis unit from his bedroom. The FBI doesn't hold a candle to him. He can, will and already has tracked down your enemies and he has their addresses. With his father being the new number one hero he essentially has the force of the law in his hands and if need be, he will use it. He won't do anything unjust unless your safety is in jeopardy but he won't hesitate to bring someone down. As for history he has plenty of books ranging from founding of countries to wars, to major technological advancements to the invention of toilet paper. He knows some very niche history facts. If you need to impress a teacher with knowledge on history he has you covered. He'll make the teacher quit their job in shame.

Shoto is absolutely loyal to the end, open minded and kind to a fault. He understands how it's like to be ignored, misunderstood and bullied and he won't treat anyone else that way. Regardless of his opinion on someone he still gives them respect and kindness. He doesn't care how rude or petty someone acts, they're still a human and deserve to be treated as such.

He goes out of his way to buy you special gifts, he values personal meaning over monetary value. Between a basic cheap necklace and an expensive bracelet of your favorite gemstone and color, you bet he's going for the bracelet. The cost isn't important to him, he just wants to see your face light up when you open the gift. As for gifts from you he doesn't care about how much you spent, he just wants something from the heart. You could give him an origami swan that cost you nothing to make and he would treasure it like a rare antique. As for quality time, he always enjoys a good movie, board game, cuddle session or just a nap. Like I mentioned before, any time spent together is time spent well.

I hope you enjoyed this friend!! 🥀 I'll be sending my part your way soon, thanks again for the offer! I had a lot of fun with this one 😘

#iidastiddies #mha x reader #bnha x reader #matchup #mha matchup #bnha matchup #matchup exchange #shoto #todoroki #shoto todoroki #todoroki shoto #todoroki x reader #shoto x reader #shoto todoroki x reader #todoroki shoto x reader

12 notes · View notes

ashtonq247 · 4 years

Text

Kaminari Denki headcannons!!

Bc it’s his bday and I love him (this will not cover his fam bc I switch between backstories with him so much that I just have no clue)

Buckle up bc this is a very long post I did not mean to get this deep lol

Let’s start with the most obvious- he makes friends easily, but I’m not just talking other students, I’m also talking the staff. This boy makes friends with the janitors and the lunch ladies and even the teachers!! He also makes friends with the security bots and pranks them a lot

This stems from him wanting ppl to like him. I think this bc of the fact that his character sheet says he likes all things “trendy” - I think he rlly wants to be known as the cool guy bc he is rlly insecure of himself

And as much as I think he is very trendy, I also think he is a big literature nerd! I believe he is more likely to listen to audio books tho, but I’m not entirely 100% sure though. He tries to keep this underwrap, but eventually he does join momo’s book club and brings completely different analysis to the table :D

He is just generally into the arts (we see this in cannon- he plays guitar, is seen drawing Aizawa, references Hemingway) so I see him as a more creative guy rather than a logically minded dude

This boy has adhd, anxiety, and dyslexia and dyscalcula (he was able to work through dyslexia bc he read so much, but still has problems with his dyscalcula) and this causes issues for him in school. He also a HUGE procrastinator. He often feels stupid and dumb bc if it (also doesn’t help that even his friends joke abt it too, but as long as it’s just a joke he shouldn’t make a big deal abt it right??)

I say he has anxiety because of the way he reacts to when he is training- always panicking and frying his brain. I think what stans between him and being rlly op is his anxiety and view of himself

Speaking of him frying his brain, I headcannon he has litchenburg figures, which if u don’t know r these rlly cool scars that look kinda like branches with what kinda looks like flowers so cool tbh, and BEFORE u say “he obviously doesn’t have them cannonly” let me just say that his quirk affects his brain cannonly!! It’s not weird for it to also affect his skin!!! I think he might have had litchenburg figures if they were more commonly known as it is a very cool thing tbh

I also think that bc his brain gets impacted by his quirk, sometimes his nerves get impacted too. This means he sometimes can’t taste food (and he doesn’t eat it when he can’t taste it, which pisses Bakugo off) and he also can’t feel things as well (I believe the class figures this out after Denki went to poor himself some tea but didn’t know the kettle was still rlly hot and so he grabbed it not knowing he was burning himself until he handed it over to someone who then dropped the pot bc it was so hot- needles to say he had to go to recovery girl that day)

He has never been to the aquarium bc as a child he had terrible control over his quirk and that made ppl nervous to put him near water (he goes as a teen with the bakusquad and is absolutely floored- his favorite creatures are of course all the sting rays, jelly fish, and electric eel- cue bakusquad comparing him to the brainless jellyfish)

He also doesn’t know how to swim till he was in middle school (once he was in better control of his quirk he went out and learned to swim on his own bc he had to learn how if he wanted to be a hero u know? He never quit got the hang of it tho)

Storms make him very energized and his already low ability to focus worsens. Prone to accidentally zapping ppl. He mostly stays in his room when storms happen bc he doesn’t want to hurt ppl/ wreck electronics on accident. He doesn’t even get to chat with friends on the phone bc he would wreck it so storms get rlly lonely :(

Also is basically a lightning rod. It hurts bc of how forceful it is, but it’s also not that big of a deal to him

Is prtty forgetful unfortunately due to all the times he fried his brain. It’s something he really tries not to think about

He probs can’t sleep very easily due to all his energy

He hates frying his brain bc it’s very hard to understand what’s going on when he does. Everything is a lot more sluggish and things are simultaneously way too much and he gets hyper sensitive and at the same time his senses are also very groggy and weird. It’s over all a bad time, but he got used to it

Whenever he fried his brain instead of being all wheyyy and thumbs upy he use to act more vegetative which rlly freaked ppl out so he eventually learned to get to where he is now when he fries his brain

Kids use to take advantage of his whey mode and do pranks on him which often got him hurt, but he never rlly felt it at first so he didn’t mind to bad. As long it was just joking and they were having fun right??

Time for happy ones!! His favorite foods (besides burgers, those r his favorite cannonly) all have some coralation with memes (speggeti tacos, mac n cheese, “chonky” milk, chicken nuggy, etc)

He is a meme lord yes

Stans pikachu (obvi)

U cannot convince me that he doesn’t paint his nails black, maybe with a little lightning bolt on his middle finger. This boy cannonly wears a choker common

He does face masks with Mina!! I believe he cares abt his looks greatly, and does beauty routines with Mina all the time. I’m constantly switching btween wether or not he owns it, or is a bit insecure and tries not to show this side to much to the boys

Why does this show not give him skinny jeans?? I mean common his entire style calls for skinny jeans. Maybe it’s Japan fashion or smth bc if it was in America he’d have skinny jeans bc it’s the trendy thing u know

Cannot cook. Can barely work the microwave. Claims unmarked food and eats it at midnight

Has a lot of weird info stored in his brain- how weather works, psychology stuff, weird facts abt bees, etc- that he learns randomly, never rlly trying to learn them but it sort of just happens u know. This frustrates Bakugo and jirou to no end bc he knows all these useless facts about how 1,200,000 mosquitos is all it takes for them to all at once drain a human of all their blood in a second, but not about how to work the pathagorean theorem

Idk why I think this (and it’s a popular headcannon too), but he knows at least 3/4 languages. It just suits him?? Bc he is a ppl person??? I don’t know??

Gets major test anxiety

Teachers either love him or hate him no in between. A lot of his elementary teachers absolutely hated him and would tear him down by calling him stupid and annoying. In middle school when he learns to control his quirk better, teachers rlly liked him- in the way that class clown trouble makers are liked by teachers. He may not excel in his class but he is a pretty funny dude.

He is constantly either underestimated or overestimated. Kaminari himself does this as well. It’s part of the issue with his hero training

Cats do not like him. They may like being petted bc if the static electricity, but when Kami pets cats he just absorbs the static- no pleasure :(((- or he accidentally has too much static electricity. If so then only tge rlly fluffy cats like him. Either case, shinsou finds a cat that likes kaminari as well and it is very cute :33

THE class prankster. Even on the teachers! The death glare Aizawa gave him on the one time prancing him worked is one kaminari will never forget (he still tries to prank him despite this lol)

Constantly teasing Bakugo as a way to press his buttons. It’s debatable on wether or not this helps bakugo’s anger issues

He is the wingman between Bakugo and Kirishima change my mind!!

Also mandatory kaminari is bisexual headcannon bc he rlly gives me those vibes. I think he doesn’t know yet that he’s bisexual, and when he thinks a fellow bro is hot he thinks he’s just admiring his bro u know. Maybe even thinks he is jealous. He does flirt with all genders tho mostly as a joke. He draws dicks as jokes but he always puts a little too much detail in them for him to rlly be straight

Can be used as a defibrillator as long as he can focus

Honestly there’s so much stuff kaminari has the potential to do with his quirk it’s a shame the manga/anime doesn’t use it

Like I rlly want to see him use his quirk in training to blow out all the lights in a building so he can use it for his advantage

That’d be badass

Also his quirk makes him very hard to be caught when their training. He can slip out of ppls grasp easily with a shock, and he also just has good reflexes in genral (I think this is cannon). Cue class 1-a running around trying and failing to catch him lol. Their best bet is to get him to fry his brain :(

He was popular in school before UA bc of his quirk and bc of how charming and easy to get a long with he is. This lead a lot of his friends to be very shallow. He didn’t rlly think about wether or not someone was trying to be his friend or not, he just liked being liked. This lead him to his whole liking trendy things, and he often felt that if he wasn’t seen as cool or funny his friends would all leave him. His whole rlly liking to talk thing caused a lot of ppl to think he was annoying at times, but he was never rlly able to lose that trait

The bakusquad was the first friend group he got rlly close too. He felt he can be himself around them and be the crackhead he was always meant to be. He still always concerned about wether they might leave him if he’s too annoying bc of anxiety but he’s getting better :)

He is a bringer of chaos and that’s part of his charm! Never dull with Denki around. He’s always doing the weirdest stuff, and ever since Mina, Kiri, and Sero, this has only doubled!

He is always calling Momo a genius (bc she is) and they are rlly good friends

Is an unofficial emo squad member (just look at his hero costume)

A sinnamon roll I’m srry but he ain’t a cinnamon roll. He has a dirty mind lol

Peepee jokes

Probably does tik tok dances I’m sorry

Nintendo fan for life

Xbox or PlayStation?- “Nintendo wut u mean”

Abbreviates so much it’s kinda hard to read,. Like if u thought I was bad this boy is soo much worse

It’s kinda ironic bc he has a very large vocabulary lol

He only uses it when he’s being sassy or very passionate

Mixes his gen z lingo with his big brain vicab to create atrocities of sentences

”bro the rise of the proletariat is lit tbh”

He is the worst to text with. He gives Bakugo aneurysms

Yeet yote to be yoted

3am shower thoughts

Unpopular opinion: i don’t think he likes weed. It probs reminds him too much of his whey mode

He’s a good strategist, but let’s the other team members think of the plans bc of insecurity, and otherwise his anxiety causes his smartness to shut down

Very good at zoning out. Sometimes he accidentally zones out so hard during class he misses the entire lesson and is only brought out bc of the school bell. Aizawa is best at snapping him out of it

Tbh I don’t think UA would be good with mental health. You’d think they’d hire a professional therapist or smth, but maybe it’s bc hero’s are so glorified ppl don’t ever think about these issues

I doubt the teachers had very good teacher training u know

We’ve mostly seen young heroes. I bet that’s bc they die so often, and if they don’t die in battle the mental health issues that stem from trauma and the media’s pressure are such an issue that it’s not uncommon for hero work to have high suicide rates

Anyway I’m starting to lose track of things thanks for coming to my ted talk I think I’ll stop here

#bnha denki #bnha kaminari #denki #denki headcanons #kaminari #mha #denki kaminari #kaminari stan #kaminari denki #kaminari analysis #accidently turned into analysis #not gonna lie #happy birthday kaminari

88 notes · View notes

seasaltmemories · 4 years

Text

Persona 5 Royal Review/Analysis

So I didn’t have a ps4 when the original persona 5 came out, so royal was my first experience with the game, as a result, I will be talking about spoilers for both the original content and Royal bc a lot of the additions seem mixed in aside from just the third semester stuff

let’s get the summary

Prepare for an all-new RPG experience in Persona 5 Royal based in the universe of the award-winning series, Persona! Don the mask of Joker and join the Phantom Thieves of Hearts. Break free from the chains of modern society and stage grand heists to infiltrate the minds of the corrupt and make them change their ways! Persona 5 Royal is packed with new characters, confidants, story depth, new locations to explore, and a new grappling hook mechanic for stealthy access to new areas.

So one of the things that I picked up really early on into my playthrough was that Persona 5 feels like a very adolescent piece of media, like yeah it is about highschoolers, but more than just its cast and setting, it seemed really fixated on capturing and adolescent mindset, there is this fresh awareness to the injustices of the world and a burning desire to fix it without much understanding of how to even began to tackle those problems, and the fact it stuck so hard to to that worldview made me a lot more forgiving of its flaws then I might have otherwise been, not that there isn’t stuff to critique about the way it tackles controversial issues, but at the same time i just had this mindset of, “well of course they aren’t going to get everything right, what can you expect from teens?”

Anyone who knows me knows I am a pretentious blow-hard, but I think P5 is a perfect example of just how important style is to anything. So much of the pure glee and joy I got when I booted up the game came from the fun presentation and commitment to the phantom thief aesthetic, I have a lot of thoughts on gameplay that seem to be contradictory to the general consensus but to keep things brief, all the “sneaking’ around a palace, grappling from places, ambushing enemies, and performing all out attacks just all gave this sense of being cool and stylish that was great, even if the writing stronger, without those fun flourishes I don’t think I would have enjoyed my experience as much

I also think the more than any other game, persona 5 does a great job of making me thinking “just one more thing” you got a lot of confidants to fill and stats to raise to fill them so there is always something to do, at most during the story sections things sometimes dragged, but i was eager to finish them to get back to finishing my goals, for as long as the game was, this made it feel so much more manageable

Unpacking an entire 110 hour playthrough is kinda an overwhelming task, so instead I’m going to talk about my four favorite characters and hopefully that will cover some good amount of material

1) Goro Akechi- one of the first things I knew about this game was what a controversial character this bastard was and it turns out I fell on the side that loves him bc I think I have a thing for traitor characters, I have to say though for most of the game I wasn’t sure how I felt about him, I knew his true role going in, so it was hard to get attached to Detective Prince Akechi as most of his interactions with Joker felt like an act, however his Rank 8 confidant link, when he not only pulls out a gun on you and challenges you to an one on one fight but also freaking throws a glove to challenge you in a duel I was like “oh so you’re a little bitch boy then!” and never turned back

To me part of what makes him so compelling is just how stubbornly he is set on his path straight to Hell, a lot of ppl were moved by his tragic backstory but honestly it does little for me, I think it is important to consider, but you have to remember he approached Shido about his powers first and basically volunteered to be his personal assassin, still it is hard to ignore that sense of lost potential, in a way I can see how getting to pretend to be a part of a safe and welcoming team environment almost made things worst because he just kept feeling like, “why wasn’t I allowed to have this earlier” and just too tied to his current path of self-destruction to waver from it, like even the fact the Phantom Thieves and he had the same goals regarding Shido in the end, he couldn’t side with bc that would mean acknowledging all the murder he did was for nothing, so they just continued to be another target on his list, made all the more dangerous bc of the affection he held for them

That said I don’t think I would have liked him so much without Royal’s updates, I mentioned Rank 8 being a key moment for me but aside from that, the fight with him in Shido palace had so much going on, it kinda dulled the weight of any one of the numerous revelations, 3rd semester kinda brought in the perfect amount and balance of the different sides of Akechi, the minute he appeared I swear me and my brother cheered in joy, obvious spoilers for the rest of it

I had seen 3rd semester Akechi called “feral” and while he is still as horny for murder as ever, i don’t really think that fits, there is still a sense of restraint to his actions, yet he doesn’t mask his true intentions and feelings so much, what I like is that his rudeness and outbursts come off as very deliberate and planned, as if he enjoys exposing the contrast between his “pleasant” reputation and his true bitterness, and with the reveal that oops he is supposed to be dead, you still have that determined “don’t be a fucking pussy, just pull the trigger,” attitude, I really like the dynamic that forms between a Joker that just wants the best for him and an Akechi that just emphatically refuses to be saved in anyway, he is an easy character to woobify but I love how canon just at every turn doesn’t let you ever see his true vulnerability even if we all know it exists down there, also just something about hearing him curse is always so much fun and delightful

TLDR: I have a lot of feelings about this edgy bastard and may or may not already have a playlist for him

2) Makoto Niijima- another character I had an interesting relationship with, while from the start she seemed like my type, the overwhelming love for her kinda made my hipster side apprehensive, however predictably I was won over and I did romance her in the end (what can I saw my Joker is into brunettes)

Part of what makes her stick out so much to me, is how the game felt much less afraid to show her unlikable in comparison to other characters, i usually don’t complain or really notice this but more than any other game series I’ve played, there is definitely a lot of self-insert fantasy elements involved, ppl rip the newer FE games apart for that, but I never really saw it as the terrible as the cast had dozens of life changing interactions with other characters, the fact most of the interaction we see are through Joker’s eyes, and the fact that he is the catalyst to changing several adults’ lives made this element a lot more noticeable

But not only does Makoto take an antagonistic role at first, but they let her be so smug and annoying that I probably hated her with the same passion as the characters themselves, yet even when she comes over to or sides, her flaws are still pretty open, like when trying to help out Futuba, she definitely had that air of, “neurotypical trying too hard to make you normal” that was understandable but still annoying, and I appreciate it bc it made the contrast between her good points all the sharper

I kinda wanted to roll my eyes at first at her archetype as an honors student, bc yeah i was a nerdy student who didn’t know how to connect with my peers and just kinda subconsciously sucked up to adults bc I didn’t know what else to do, but in comparison to the teeming tragic backstories involved, you can see a stark difference in scale, yet Makoto is just carrying all this familiar teenage girl anger that reminds me a lot of Serena from Arc V, and getting to see her embrace it is very cathartic, I also really enjoyed her confidant which was surprising after seeing everyone tear into it so much, I feel like a lot of ppl’s confidant’s centered around other ppl and it didn’t just start off with the Eiko stuff, you see her Makoto want to change from the sheltered snobbish life she has kinda trapped herself in and rediscover her dream of being a police commissioner, I also found it fitting for her to also kinda figure that out through her own little investigation and to see that exploration of justice explored through her acting with a third party

The fact she is related to Sae also gives her interesting relationships we get to see from a different POV, and a greater investment in arcs outside her own, it just naturally gives her the feeling of being more well-rounded to have it spread out, and while her romance stuff did have the same sort of fantasy elements (that I greatly self-indulged in) overall I never felt like Joker was “saving” her in some way but growing and exploring along sides her

Overall, a great character and while i think best girl debates are dumb, I will not stand for hearing her described as worst girl

3) Ann Takamaki- honestly before I got this game I expected her to be the “main girl” with a lot of popularity and focus so seeing how little love she gets was heartbreaking for me, bc she is part of what made the early phantom thieves so enjoyable

I’ve heard the discussions about the issues around her sexualization and I think things on that access come out to be a wash, the developers kinda brush near some interesting ideas about the struggles women face with sex and attraction but don’t really know what to do with that, and so I think trying to trace and overall arch one way or another about her and her body issues is kinda a lesson in futility

in the end though what made her click for me is just how much fun her personality is, like I feel like in other stories her cheerfulness might come off as generic, but the fact that she is introduced so depressed and sullen makes her attitude shift come off as refreshing, like we know she can be serious, but the fact she isn’t being repeatedly sexually harassed by her teacher gives her like plenty of reason to goof off and enjoy herself

Again despite all the criticism I really enjoyed her confidants, the Mika stuff was honestly barely a blip in the thing and most of it alternated between her shooting the breeze and just having fun and still dealing with that lingering guilt and issues surrounding Shiho and just not having been able to save a close friend when she really needed her, I think the contrast is very much needed, especially to keep things from feeling like wallowing, which i felt was a problem with some other confidants

In the end though the main reason i didn’t romance her was bc as much as I liked her as a character, I didn’t want her to be with Joker specifically, i wanted to support her and see her finally confess her feelings to Shiho and the two of them go ride off into the sunset lol, still there’s a reason I reached rank 10 with her first

4) Takuto Maruki- lol so in this section I’m going to basically go into all my 3rd semester thoughts, again the first leg of his confidant was kinda dull, but I was prioritizing him bc of the deadline, once we got into his personal past that is where I got interested

On one hand part of the charm was just getting to see a more adult story, while there are other adult confidants I found the grad school and like academic stuff relatable, plus like the little moment with the steamed glasses was very funny, he’s just a down to earth guy and his kindness is genuine

However when he stepped up as the antagonist in the third semester, that’s when he got interesting, I found the conflict itself of a dream world to be kinda simple, aside from the fact obviously we need to oppose this for a plot to happen, Persona 5 is all about this humanist approach to personal growth and change, most of what I found fascinating about Maruki was the kinda self-martyring narcissism to his approach, like aside from treat the phantom thieves with kid gloves at time and just doing his best to avoid being a bad guy, there is this simmering resentment he masks and tries to replace with his desire to basically save the world, rather than deal with his own drama and baggage he tries to invest his energy into solving other problems

And you can see some of the parallels between him and the phantom thieves that points out some of hypocrisy of themselves, calculating the exact risks and harms of altering ppl through the Metaverse is hard to do due to a variety of factors, personally I don’t even have other Persona games to look to, but in general while it is for the greater good, the phantom thieves basically impose their will onto ppl who didn’t consent to that change, and in the end they decide to oppose Maruki purely based on their desires to not live in it, the game doesn’t do much with it, but I found the contrast more interesting than the Holy Grail one, plus his boss battle was more fun bc you actually got to use the main mechanic of the game, exploiting weaknesses and baton passing

But yeah all this comes to a head at the latter half of the boss fight where he just is so desperate and refuses to lose, it is like abundantly clear that this dream world is much more for himself than it is for anyone else, it is a desire to turn all his trauma into something more meaningful than just pain, and nothing shows that more clearly than the fact he fistfights a high schooler even after he has basically lost and tries to let himself die rather than face the consequences of his lost. All in all I think he was the my favorite antagonist and palace holder

Some last thoughts I couldn’t fit elsewhere: Casino was my favorite palace, while weak story-wise, Okumura was far from my least favorite palace gameplay-wise and his boss fight as frustrating as it was might be my favorite for engaging with the player, if anything my least favorite palace was Futaba’s, my favorite showtimes are probably Morgana/Ann, Makoto/Ryuji, and Joker/Kasumi, Caroline and Justine are a delight and I really miss them, Tycoon is addicting and distracted me from being able to beat the game for a while

I got more hot takes I might elaborate on in length in the future, but in conclusion this is another rec where I can see and understand ppl being disappointed in some of the writing and its quality but at the same time i think there is still value ppl are too quick to dismiss and definitely multiple reasons to still enjoy it, I think this is going to stick with me for longer than I first thought it wound

#persona 5 #my reviews #p5 royal spoilers #mutuals feel free to discuss this with me more #bc those hot takes are real but at the same time i wanted to keep this focused on what I enjoyed #rather than drown ppl in nitpicks

9 notes · View notes

ulookgoodtoday · 6 years

Text

This is gonna be a long rant

No need to say this but I am a CS, I strongly believe they were in love and actually believe they still are. If you don’t see it I’m sorry for you bc it means you’ve never been in love and seen someone staring at you like they do.  Plus our captain Dinah (and her aunt) made it pretty clear. If you’re in doubt it could also be bc of the narrative stupid managers tried to pull, but honestly anyone can see through it. I suggest you read Emisons Camren theory and post about synchronization (which I found out after I made my mind clear ab Camren) which makes perfectly sense and was confirmed to be true at 98% by ExposingLaucy.

Let me say that of course this is just my opinion and I ALWAYS take into consideration that it could be not real. I respect L and C personal life and never dare to intrude or comment their post on social networks. I want them to be happy and if they are now (I believe they are) I am happy. They can be whom whoever THEY want.

Said so, here’s my delusional Camren theory. It’s not about proving Camren is real but an analysis of their relationship (I tried to be accurate, considering songs, interviews, trustworthy sources, timing).

I believe they had feelings for each other since the beginning (2012-3), especially C, but they genuinely thought they were just friends or that it was nothing serious (ExposingLaucy said C was the one to fell in love - “Mine is Lauren” “Who are u kissing under the mistletoe?” Her obsession with “Normani”- and L slowly fell in love w her). That’s why L gave birth to Camren “it’s Camren yo” (16 oct 2012) and why they were so explicit in the interviews, on camera, tumbrl, twitter, bc they thought it was a joke and were really close. Then ppl started to see what basically they couldn’t see or admit to themselves yet (love in their eyes), ppl started shipping them and assuming they were together but again they brushed it away and even invited us to float that f boat (Nov 2013). I believe if they ever kissed before 2014 it was as a joke, at least for L (“What happened in the elevator?” Feb 2013 DinahJane on twitter. #camrenfeels 28th June 2013 and the photo of them cuddling, L saying “Thanks babe” Feb 2014 and being totally chill with it) and above all they never talked about it.

I know C said back then that her first kiss was at 17 (and everyone assumed it was with Austin but could have been with L - April 2014) and then in a recent interview ab her album she said she was 16 when she had her first kiss so it could be 1) they kissed before 2) they kissed before but as a joke and then, after realizing how they felt for each other, she reconsider that kiss 3) she messed up with her memory, she gets confused by all the bs they made her say during these years. In the same interview she said she had her first breakup at 17, which could be her telling bs and alluding at her breakup with Austin (even tho in other interviews she dismissed that relationship) or what I’ll explain later about her relationship with L.

I think C was the first to realize she had feelings for L and that’s when she wrote “Only told the moon” (where she’s scared ab her emotions and afraid the other person won’t feel the same way) even though she wrote a tweet “only told the moon” in Jun 2015. What we know through EL is that they were both each other’s first kiss and everything. [plus I’m still not over Sep 2013 when C cries singing Who are you and L glances at her every other second].

We assumed Camren real first kiss was in April 2014 (1975 concert) and it is rumored that L broke up w Brad in Dec 2014 after 8 moths. Now, I don’t believe they had an actual relationship but more a fling and not that long (L was supposed to be w Luis Felipe right? They broke up Aug 2014. And in July we have the suspicious Camren’s moans in the bunk). ANYWAY the import part is that Brad wrote I found a girl that goes "she said that she tried but she's not into guys". So now what I think is that that's basically L freaking out about the kiss she had with C because she realized she had feelings for her (so more than friendship), trying to convince herself she's not into girls, rushing into Luis and then B to prove herself wrong, then again going back to C still confused until she figures it out later. Especially when you are bisexual the process can be hard because you try to understand where you stand, if you like boys OR girls, so it’s confusing when you have feelings for both and u try to deny one or the other until you realize bisexual is A THING. The Vamps made it clear that the song is for L and then took a photo with a “Camren is real” sign in the back (well done Brad, you’re an asshole). In the song he also said that this girl started to talk to him about the other girl she was involved with, so he knew who L was in love with.

In 2014 C is in a PR relationship with Austin Moron and I think C wrote The Exchange song (unreleased as well) about that period. I came up with the timing according to a period when they were both dating others; after Chocolate by 1975 was out - we’re dressed in black, head to toe, it’s from that song while C wrote “we’ll be dressed in, all black from head to toe” and twitted it in apr 2015; also C’s tweets with the lyrics of the song - “there’s nothing like me and you and you know it” Apr 2014 - and L indirects. I think it’s ab Lauren also bc she wrote “there’s beats I’ve been skipping when my head is on your chest” and I‘ve never seen C doing that with a boy. Plus the part where she says the other person knows there’s nothing like the two of them and “you’ve been trying to say it ain’t true” so again L rushing into L/B.

Also you can tell that their relationship was never defined properly by the fact that C many times during interviews referred to a relationship she had and described it as “sort of friendship “ or “romantic relationship or whatever that was”( also look for unreleased song of C, she said she wrote it when she was 17, “Like friends do” = I’ll sit straight it the couch like friends so. And I’ll stop kissing your mouth like friends do. Cause I can’t look at you quite like friens do. You don’t say my name quite like friends do).

I think after Brad and A, they were together, during 2015 (that’s when C appeared with the ring - EL said L gave it to C in Feb 2015 - and when they try to hide and look distant in front of the camera, yet close behind cameras) but still in a confused way during all that year, with ups and downs. I’d say C was pretty cool with her sexuality while L had more difficulties; and that explains to me why C cries singing Who are you basically every time (remember the girls co-worked in writing this one, if you look up on google you can see how Camila and Lauren’s names are the first ones written). Also that’s when she could have come up with IHQ bc she said she started writing it two years before it was released (May 2017). “My name was safest in your mouth”, “your voice, it was the most familiar sound” “i was there when no one was” and in the end - this part could have been written back then or in 2017 but either way express a miscommunication- “How do I fix it? Can we talk? Can we communicate” and “Do I wanna fix it? Is it my fault? Do u miss me?”.

I think that Lauren was the one that struggled the most (from the beginning 2013), she also said in an interview (2017) that when she was little was very confused and that people calling her bisexual/gay made her angry because she couldn’t understand how they figured it out and what was about her that made them think that. It’s also tricky was she said just after that. The interviewer asked her “Did your parents know before you came out?” ab your sexuality and she said “yes, they knew before, I was dating a girl AT THE TIME so they had to know”. So ok, who was she dating tho? Lucy? Yeah right.

I think that they had a shit load of pressure from managers to not be together and at least behave in front of the camera. I remember L (think it was Sept 2015) in an interview she said “when life hits love sometimes you just die”, i mean that’s daaark, girl! Anyways, that must have led to a lot of fights between the two of them especially because you can see how in a lot of interviews C kept staring L or doing things that were pointing obviously to Camren while L was trying harder to hide it. I think C might have felt rejected and they didn’t talk about all of this (and you can tell again by their songs that they had relationship where they didn’t comunicate - expectation, something’s gotta give, in the dark, IHQ.. someone put also In your phone but L didn’t write that one).

I think that’s when C wrote Must be love, this songs screams Camren like maybe no other and describes this period. In fact she says she fell hard, that she gets mad and puts on a show, there are highs and lows, everything gets real after two am (secret relationship), that she’s gonna look at her right back and “I promise you won’t like that” (L pissed every time C is explicit) and they fuss and fight but yet she wouldn’t have it any other way.

Also it’s a link to Consequences, which is in the album (in Must be love she goes “I guess everything has consequence”) and this song has no straight-relationship explanation. Through Consequences C describes her relationship w L and what had caused. I believe she is telling us all that she loved L so much she didn’t care about the consequences that came with it, which is f managers treating them like shit, make them hide it and led to them fight as well. It is not coincidence that she wrote this in Jan 2017 after she was out the group. It is not a coincidence that in concert before playing Consequences she always sings Falling in love (“Wise men say only fools rush in” is also the beginning of Must be love). And there are links to “She loves control” in my opinion which I think describes L and maybe the role she played in all this Camren shit. (Ok C has stated that she has OCD but she doesn’t go to club and when she’s in love she fell hard so u know, so much for the control). In Must be love says “you control me more than you’ve ever known” and in Sangria Wine “yo so que tu quieres controlar mi mente” that made me think the person she’s talking ab in She loves control might not be herself but another person. Many were shook about L singing “she doesn’t let me have control anymore” in Strangers which is a HELL of a coincidence but I think Halsey wrote it so I’m not sure whether we should consider it or not.

During 2015 to 2016 we saw a lot of things that suggested the ups and down. Remember that 2015 C had major anxiety problems and a lot of trash was thrown from the fandom (especially after IKWYDLS). C saying she rather date someone out of the industry but “you can’t decide who you fall in love with, UNFORTUNATELY”. Or when they fought in another interview when C was being too obvious bc she said she would marry her celebrity crush (or any crush) even if their parents did not approve, tho she didn’t say who her crush was but “it’s important” and “i’d be in love with my celebrity crush” (she always said it was Lauren). Or when they tried to make each other jealous.

Then 2016 is tricky. They started the 7/27 tour and again we see ups and downs but mostly L more at ease with her feelings for C. I think C was still struggling with her anxiety problems and all the narrative the managers were forcing the 5 of them to follow (they were prep C’s departure). I remember how L broke down 8 Sep 2016 singing No way, she always said that it was her fav song and described it as a dialogue happening in a couple; a toxic situation, two people who wants to be together but know shouldn’t be together and also ppl from the outside telling them they shouldn’t be together (she was so into this song that during a soundcheck she said she actually could imagine a visual and music video for it). She also cried during Scared to be happy and then tweeted after the concert the she got emotional because of the LYRICS. This was in Phoenix after the show in Texas where we saw Lucy. So that made me think she was struggling back then (remember that 4 days before, C left the stage in Missouri for anxiety), trying to figure out what to do between what she felt and also the pressure for the outside (maybe C, sure as hell managers and the PR ready to come).

I think that L in 2016 realized that she wanted to commit, as I said she seemed more at ease with her sexuality. She was happy during photos with CS, she danced with the pride flag, we have the blurry kiss in London (May 2016) in front of Lucy (!!), L even interacted with C during sound-checks and sang Dope to C (who was pretty surprised), she protected her from those balloons, C and L staying one more day in Barcelona, we had the VMAs (August 2016), she called her baby and so on. She seemed very protective. I believe that’s bc they were prepping the Laucy thing and her coming out. EL said they began the process leading to Laucy in June 2016 (remember the two of them in Colombia for L’s birthday, the videos of L dancing BBW to Lucy and so on - Emisonme explained perfectly).

I think that is why she came out in the end, after all this struggles, bc she felt ready, I don’t think she was forced to. Let’s be honest, if she didn’t want to she could have said it wasn’t her in the Laucy photo or she’s not so dumb, you’re at a family wedding and you get caught kissing a girl and the photo got leaked?! I say BS. And then she decided to make a photo book with Lucy as a coming out statement?! If she wasn’t ready to do it, none of this would have happened. I think she did it for two reasons: 1) Trump was pissing her off 2) to tell C that she was ready; they let her do it bc it was convenient for her image and 5h. At the beginning of Havana - the music video - there’s an awkward scene, completely out of context. A guy comes out of a closet and says “I was in the closet” and C “so now, you’re out of the closet?” And he goes, a bit confused, “yes, for YOU”. Like wtf? C, was it necessary?! And don’t let me start with that video. C is watching the tv and you can here a woman saying in spanish “I want to be with Carmen but I can’t “, you can see a figure very similar to L and in the end C said “I love you, but I love myself more” which again made me think she’s the one that walked away in the end. Camila is giving us so many signs if u don’t see this you’re really dumb.

L obviously couldn’t come out without saying there was another girl, otherwise Camren was automatically confirmed in our mind. And who better than your best friend to help you do so and make it believable? Honestly it was a smart move and all the hate, slut shaming and shit Lucy received, she didn’t deserved it. I believe it was PR and that C was aware of this and supported it but it could have also been difficult for her. Even though she knew it wasn’t real, she might have been scared L might get involved for real, especially if you consider the fact that Camren could never be proud and loud, idk. Emisonme on tumbrl explained the Laucy shit so perfectly that I suggest u read it, I agree with everything she said. Again Emisonme explain PERFECTLY why L could come out as bi while C can’t (and she’s so gay she’s shitting rainbows).

I think shit went down tho, and they fell apart. I don’t know if it was bc of management’s pressure or miscommunication or whatever but apparently C walked away (as she said in many interviews that the situation was toxic - not the relationship - in something’s gotta give and Havana music video and in concert before singing Scar Tissue). I think that their break-up happened during that period of L coming out and C leaving/kicked out fifth harmony but that is so messed up I’m not elaborating [Theory: C leaving 5h was always supposed to happen]. Just remember how Dinah’s aunt said that Lauren would be devastated by the fact C left (”I’m pretty sure Lauren is heartbroken and shook, she is probably crying her brain away. But she already knew. If anything Lauren is leaving too. You gotta have your girl’s back. Of course I’m sure they are going to do a duet like on their own, you know, in the bedroom.”)

That’s when L was reaaally pissed at Camren fans (the tweet in Feb 2017), went a bit sassy in interviews avoiding to talk about C, and after “leaving Lucy” she “started dating Ty” (I call PR huge af). The reasons why she was pissed ab CS could be many, for starters I believe they broke up (so that’s one), n2 she came out and faked a relationship with another girl to protect C’s straight image and yet everyone kept believing in Camren, n3 her managers made her pull her straight image as well starting dating Ty to shut us up BUT I believe the real reason is n4 managers wanted to kill Camren (to launch C’s straight image) and destroy her image (as they did with the marijuana shit they pulled) bc even though i think the first three reasons are true and that’s what was going on in L’s mind I don’t think she would attack her fans and C like that. Anyways L tweeted “eyes on the moon” the day the Grammys (Feb 2017) were held and we know who the moon is.

I think C’s the one who walked away also bc of “Make u mad”, which was written mostly by L and she’s pissed y’all. There are also links btw this song and C’s songs. L also sang Back to me, she collaborated in writing the text but I don’t know to what extent but still a HELL of a coincidence.

I think they first met after all this shit at the Grammy’s after party in Feb 2017 but didn’t interact. Camila was there and she said that “In the dark” is about a boy she met there; then we have L who tweeted just the day after the Grammy’s after party ab waking up with hang over and understanding what’s fake and real. Funfact: read the lyrics of In the dark. “Vampires at the same places” we know Lauren is Lamp. L is running and “making rounds with your fake friends” and again “i can see u’re scared of your emotions, i can see you’re hoping you’re not hopeless” “who are u when it’s 3am and u are all alone” “secrets, endless”. Basically she’s asking this person to show her her real self.

Ppl said they met in March/April 2017 (i think) in studio (Diplo’s?) and I think that’s when C came up with All these years (L had longer hair - she had it cut in 2016; she had gained a bit of weight - that’s for arms stronger; her eyes, I mean WE BEEN KNEW; C was not prepared so she didn’t know L was going to be there; it was a quick hello bc they were not fine back then; “sounds like you’re happy with her” could be L’s PR; “wish I loved u like I miss u” implies that she had a relationship with that person but maybe not loved her in the right way or enough to make it last - she confirmed in an interview that this song is about an ex; who does C knows from YEARS? If I hear another SM shipper I’ll throw up)

Anyways I think that towards the mid of 2017 they kinda reconnected and now they’re in good terms. Remember how C said multiple times how even though it was a toxic situation she’d do it all over again. So that makes me think that they loved each other and the problem was mostly all the environment they were into (if the relationship was trash why on earth would she do it again?!) and C is trying to say to L: baby come back to me.

Since this is not a post w the intent of explaining why Camren is real I won’t elaborate.

In conclusion I think they are still in love (C sang it in every possible way) and probably a couple or working on to be one and the problems in their relationship were due to miscommunication and pressure from the outside.

—> Again Emisonme made super clear why they couldn’t be together in the Music business.

Stay strong in this PR shit and let them be. Even if they don’t tell us, doesn’t mean it isn’t true.

Just remember EL said 2018 would be the year of the commitment, 20gayteen everybody.

“I am a lover and a fighter. I will fight for what I love” Go get your girl Lauren

#camren #camila cabello #lauren jauregui #camren is real #camren is love #camren is life #camren is endgame #camrenisotp #camila #pr #20gayteen #lgbtq #rainbow #camren theory #theory #delusional

3K notes · View notes

liu-lang · 5 years

Text

I’ve been sitting on this for a month. I’ve mentioned before I’ve had lower back pain since December / January. I went to see a doctor and got my first x-ray on the left. He said he didn’t see anything abnormal and attributed the pain to something muscular. The pain persisted and I saw another doctor at a different hospital which resulted in my x-ray on the right. He said I have lumbar spinal stenosis. In particular he mentioned my L3 to L5 and he pointed out these “cracks” in my pelvis. This was all a lot to take in. He prescribed me some pain medication, told me that this usually occurs in ppl 50+ and it would continue to get worse. He also pointed out the curve in my spine and said it was like a snake ... I alr knew I had scoliosis but it’s in the upper portion and curves to the right. The stuff going on in my lower spine is new to me. He said it is still relatively mild but it looks old, over 6 months - which matches up with when the symptoms started happening.

I had a lot of time to think about treatment options while I was in hospital with pneumonia. Ideally I get some sort of physical therapy or chiropractic care (I’m not keen on this and a bit wary based on past experiences but just thinking of all the options) to help alleviate the pressure on my spinal cord. For the past 6 months I haven’t been able to walk or stand up or sit without any sort of pain always being present. Even standing up straight hurts. The only time where there isn’t pain is if I’m lying flat on my back. But now sometimes the pain is too much it interrupts my sleep. Every time I think about how this will gradually worsen and affect my mobility, it makes me scared.

Long story short, I’m going to go back home to Singapore again for hari raya puasa June 3 to June 7. My mum will be in sg for 2 months and wants me to see her. (This is another blog post altogether). I want to finish my teaching contract here in China. I know health is first etc etc but I just don’t want to be a failure so I’m trying to have my cake and eat it too. My contract ends in September. I’m so close to just finishing it out and meeting my savings goal. If it’s possible, I want to get a second and more detailed opinion in Singapore. The lack of language barrier would help a lot too. In order for me to do this, I have to tell my dad. My dilemma is telling my dad but not telling my mum. As of right now neither of my parents know I’ve been ill throughout my contract. I know if I tell my mum she will insist I quit immediately and move in with her in Las Vegas which is the LAST thing I need or want for my mental health. Also who knows what kind of medical care or when I could get it if I went back to the US without a job lined up.

I feel like if I were to go back to sg, not say anything and not try to at least seek treatment, I’m gonna be living with an unknown for the next 4 months. One of my friends told me to do what’s right for me. They asked if I could handle my mum’s reaction to the news and I told them no. And they said they answers my question. On one hand I *understand* as a parent when you hear your kid is sick you wanna do everything to help and take care of them. But I think bc my mum views me as her “constantly sick child” it gets very overprotective very quickly and she has Münchausen syndrome by proxy tendencies. It’s not that I don’t want her to care. I want her to trust tt I as an adult can make my own decisions about my health. Tt being said I know tt this problem I have stems from my fear of my mum’s reaction so I’m actually not able to make the best decision for my health.

TLDR ; how do I tell my dad I have lumbar spinal stenosis so I can get a second opinion but not tell my mum about it bc she’ll freak out and force me to move back in with her. bonus question : should I even tell my parents any of this in the first place

#personal #beijing move

7 notes · View notes

lunebinnie · 6 years

Note

(1/14)I am so sorry for taking so long! (I also had to spend a lot of time studying this week bc I had my first exam for my Anatomy Lab on Wednesday... And then we had our first exam for *Lecture* Thursday (which also was the day I had a bunch of powerpoints due for my very intimidating adviser...) and then I had to substitute teach all day Friday (and then I meant to respond sooner but I got so busy 😭) so yeah I completely understand about school getting in the way no worries abt it!)

And also sleeping in on a day off when you’ve been busy studying lately is completely valid hon 👌 I hope that your midterms go well and that you’re able to stay healthy and take care of yourself in the midst of preparing! (not that you wouldn’t, I just have a bad habit of neglecting things like healthy sleeping and eating habits when I get caught up studying, so hopefully you’re not like me in that way) And yeah me too! I mean on the one hand I understand *why* they have that limit

3)If u could just send as many as u want there would be so much more spam and ppl would definitely abuse that. But also?? Um? I have a chronic condition called ‘Can'tShuttheFuckUp-itis’? 🤷 This policy is so discriminatory towards people like me who suffer from this crippling condition! I feel oppressed honestly 🙄 tumblr rlly has something against ppl just trying to get to know each other huh? Lol, but at least now we know why it eats them I’ll be sure to try to prevent that in the future

4)And oh my gosh that’s so cool! I’m super jealous!! 😮 lol. I wish they hosted kpop nights at my local bar! 😭😭 But no, I’m here at my little state college in a little 2 mi2 town just under pop 5500 (and idek if that’s before or after counting college students) in the middle of the 'farm zone’ of my state. All we get is country night @Riley’s 😩 RIP. But ya I wish I had more ppl around me who were into kpop! So far I’ve only met 3 ppl who listen to it. One was that roommate I told you about

5)One is just a casual listener who isn’t really into 3rd gen groups and mostly just listens to Girl’s Generation but that’s valid, and one isn’t even rlly a fan of any groups in particular, she just puts the kpop station on when she studies bc she says she needs music but if it’s in English she gets distracted, lol And omg that is insane! $500?? And 5 copies of the same album? 😲 (Says the girl who’s been a Monbebe for a hot 2 months and has already bought three (3??) Monsta X T-shirts… 😂

6)in my defense tho one of them was only $10 bc it was Black Friday? And u can’t blame me, Hot Topic is my krypotonite lmao) but yeah I already feel guilty about spending 30+ dollars on one copy of an album (thx international shipping) That’s so wild. And yeah I don’t get why ppl feel the need go out of their way just to insult other ppl’s music taste. I’m also pretty self conscious abt sharing my music taste and obviously the way everyone around me talks abt kpop has made me even moreso now 🙃

7) I haven’t gotten into too many groups yet bc I’m trying to go slowly and focus on getting into one group at a time but I do have a long list of groups I plan on getting into eventually! NU'EST is one that I’ve heard some of their songs on my Spotify based on my listening history and they’re on the list haha 😂 And omg I feel really similarly about Got7! I tried to get into them after I got into Monsta X and right before I got into Astro and although I did really like some of their songs

8)I haven’t really been able to get into their music as much as MX and Astro’s yet. I do think they seem like a really fun group in terms of personality though. As for the comeback I know right?? I mean I know a lot of ppl were freaking out abt the comeback being a 'sexy’ and how it wasn’t gonna be the same cute Astro we all love anymore. But they filled the MV with flowers and glitter and still managed to make it sexy as fuck! This album has a very different vibe but it still felt like them

9) They managed to pull off a more mature and sexy concept while still staying true to themselves and I’m so here for it! I don’t know if I could really pick a favorite era because I love them all! I mean Spring Up was an excellent era and every era since then has been great. They really don’t know how to have any bad concepts or make any bad songs huh? Lol. Since I’m still pretty new I really love the title tracks since I’ve heard them the most. (I have listened to their full discography

10)But I haven’t listened to their Bsides enough to pick out my favorites from those) I also really love Again though! The first time I saw the dance practice I was super into it and then I looked up the lyrics and was like 'this is supposed to be sad/regretful song it has no reason to be this much of a BOP?!’ 😂 I have such a hard time picking favorites though. Since All Light is new though I actually have listened to it enough times to pick some 'non-title song favorites’ from there haha

11) Other than All Night (which is great, obvi) I also really like Starry Sky, Moonwalk and Role Play 😂 and Bloom is so pretty oh my god! 😭😭 the album is great and has no bad songs but those are the ones I particularly like. I feel u about the dances honestly. I think that’s actually what drew me to kpop initially. I mean I like listening to the songs ofc but it wasn’t until after I actually watched an MV/saw the choreography that I actually was like… Oh shit I’m gonna have to be a fan now

12) It was the visual aspect that really made me want to be a kpop fan bc I haven’t really seen that level of performance with any western music. Which isn’t to say I think all western music is bad but I think it’s really impressive to watch kpop groups singing and also doing really impressive choreography and performing at the same time. Plus that’s the part I can show my family and say 'even if you don’t like the music because of the language barrier you have to admit they’re talented dancers’

13)And yes! With Astro especially I think the dance practices rlly succinctly capture the reason why I love them so much. They are *super* talented but they also have such great chemistry and u can rlly tell that they just love each other and have so much fun together! I love a family of six hardworking dorks! 🤧💗 lol. And yeah it’s too bad that neither of are able to see them this cb ☹️ (I also did the 'hypothetically…’ research but it wouldn’t have worked out 😒) I hope you’re right though!

14)Hopefully the success of this comeback is the catalyst to Astro getting more of the attention they deserve and there will be many more opportunities to see them in the future! (Although it is too bad we won’t be able to see live performances from this cb, since it’s so pretty 😭 tho with their track record I’m sure future cb’s will be just as good lol) But what about you? Do you have any favorite songs from this cb in particular? Talk again soon! (I’ll try 2 b better @ responding 😭) -AHA

FUCKKK okay so after like a million years of midterms + 2 days straight of sleeping ya girl is BACK to answer these asks after getting through the hurdle of copying and pasting and italicizing 14 asks onto one response on my phone. Did I perhaps fail at least 3 of my midterms? Quite probably. Do I have the energy to care atm? No. Did I need to get away from everything and fly to Boston to visit my friend for reading week? Yes.

How did all your exams go? That sounds crazy though! I hope you got through everything ok!

Tbh I have the same unhealthy habits too, I essentially became nocturnal and lived on like one meal a day + snacks and coffee 😭 fr, I would be writing my midterm from 11:30-1:30, go home to eat, sleep from 4-7pm, then wake up to study all night for the next one, and repeat,,,,, I’m like an actual mess tbh

Honestly as much as I’ve enjoyed the Aroha secret admirer thing (it was sooo nice getting to meet new people) rn I’m just so glad that post-reveal we don’t have to deal with tumblr ask limits and writing entire essay responses all in one go.

Honestly 3 shirts isn’t even THAT bad especially if they weren’t all like ordered from overseas so they wouldn’t have been that expensive. When I went to the Myeongdong underground shopping centre I went craaaazy with Kpop merch despite stanning (at that point, pretty much only) BTS for a whole 3 weeks, so I ended up coming back with 2 albums, a bunch of stickers, a photocard pack (also bonus: got an Astro one too) and like a BUNCH of bt21 stuff. Speaking of, my All Light album finally came in!! I ended up getting a Moonbin, MJ, Jinjin, and Sanha photocard plus the a Rocky lyric booklet and ik I basically got THE best set for someone who loves all of them w my whole heart 😩✊ but I’m still sad I didn’t get any Eunwoo cards since he was my first Astro bias 😭 it’s soooooo pretty I love it sm and like lowkey I’ll probably end up buying more of their albums anyway oopsss

Speaking of Monsta X btw, I heard their new song and I thought it was really good! What did you think of it?

Regarding favourite songs, I swear my moods change so much, so it’s pretty common for me to not love a song at first and sort of rediscover it months later, and tbh that’s kind of what happened with Innocent Love, Baby, and Again. In this album though, I’d say my favourite Bsides are probably be Bloom, 1 in a Million, and Heart Brew Love.

And I toootally agree with the performance aspect of kpop being the thing to attract me it, even before I got really into it I’d sometime like to watch dance practices (and lowkey even learned a bunch of choreos a with my friend last term just bc we had access to a frequently empty dance studio). It’s just super impressive to see people singing and dancing at the same time mostly live, and for the same reasons I’m also super into musicals as well, which isn’t so say I think like lip syncing or just dancing/singing is bad, it’s just refreshing to see it done all at once, you know?

Also side story it turns out that I actually DO know another Astro fan irl!! Her older sister (who I’m closer to bc we’re closer in age) is the one who bought the million got7 albums. Even though she’s been a fan of Astro since before debut, her sister doesn’t even know she listens to kpop since she was afraid of getting roasted at first, but now she’s in too deep to say anything. I’d mentioned liking Astro to her before, but she didn’t say anything bc she didn’t want to expose herself in front of her sister but on Friday I saw her while her sister was out and she was like “oh btw here’s a secret I went to the Toronto fanmeet last year but my sister doesn’t know” I was SHOOK but tbh I’m just super glad now to have someone to talk about it and go to concerts with (I’m banking on the fact that they’re coming back)

Anyway, THANK YOU SO MUCH for waiting 2747287482 million years for my response, and it was so great to finally (officially) meet you Kjersten!

@kaptain-k-pop

2 notes · View notes

professional-anti · 6 years

Text

Chapter Six: Forsaken

Chapter Six: Forsaken Aka Nazgûl. Anyhoo, Clary meets Alec and Jace in the weapons room. Alec is still hardcore judging her, but honestly, at least he’s not sucking her dick like Hodge. Our parabatai/parabros are polishing some seraph blades made by ppl Jace calls the Iron Sisters. I wonder if they’ll come back up, or if this is just another unnecessary detail.

Clary asks the perfectly reasonable question of if the blades are made by magic, and Jace shits on mundanes:

“The funny thing about mundies,” Jace said, to nobody in particular, “is how obsessed they are with magic for a bunch of people who don’t even know what the word means.”

Um,,,,, this means what exactly? mag·ic ˈmajik/ noun noun: magic 1 1.  the power of apparently influencing the course of events by using mysterious or supernatural forces.

So far, everything has been supernatural. Please tell me, Jace, about your super speshul definition of magic that will totally be nothing like this definition.

“Magic is a dark and elemental force, not just a lot of sparkly wands and crystal balls and talking goldfish.”

Clary rightfully gets annoyed at him bc he’s been fucking ridiculous. Asking if some crazy angel knives were made by magic is nothing like asking about sparkly wands and crystal balls and flue powder whatever the hell else Jace wants to bitch about. Also, steles? Wands. Crystal balls will probably come up. Talking goldfish? Give it time. Jace gives a suberdumb comparison metaphor that I’m not even gonna type out. Clary tells Jace that’s he’s driveling, and I wish she’d go off like this more. Alec unexpectedly joins team Clary and tells her that they don’t do magic.

????????? What do you call your steles and runes, then??????????? They’re literally spells??????? Cassie has just come up with this random definition of magic that makes no sense and leaves a lot of other stuff undefined. If steles aren’t magic, what are they?????

Clary asks Jace to take her to her apartment and ohhhhhhh I get it. Alec is jealous bc he has a crush on Jace. Why, Alec?? You could do so much better!! And you will do better!!! Alec is my BFF rn bc I also have a crush on my straight best friend, rip me. It’s just gay culture. But Jace shouldn’t even be into Clary. They just met. Gag me with a spoon.

Jace admits that he wasn’t totally sure that Clary was a Shadowhunter before using the stele on her, but it seems like she would have died if he hadn’t done it, so idk. I’m mad, but I got bigger problems, you know what I’m saying?

CLARY SLAPS HIM. CLARY SLAPS HIM. CLARY SLAPS HIM.

(source: https://giphy.com/gifs/harry-potter-hermione-granger-draco-malfoy-okjBrdrg20LZu)

Go OFF. Okay, so Jace goes into “an angry silence”. Boo hoo. Clary feels guilty and I’m gonna slap HER bc no one needed a slap more than Jace. All he’s done so far is mock her and make her feel bad!! It isn’t Witty Banter or Flirting, it’s just rude AF. But I’m glad the narrative seems to realize that, at least a little. It still won’t stop Clary from falling in love with him, sigh.

Ohhhhhh noooo we get some of that “Clary isn’t like other girls!” bullshit:

Farther down the train, two teenage girls sitting on an orange bench seat were giggling together. The sort of girls Clary had never liked at St. Xavier’s, sporting pink jelly mules and fake tans. Clary wondered for a moment if they were laughing at her, before she realized with a start of surprise that they were looking at Jace.

Bc girls who like boys are always Sluts and Skanks who wear those ugly jelly mules and get *gasp* tans!! There’s nothing inherently wrong with giggling or wearing fashionable shoes (were these fashionable in 2007? I was but a child then) or getting fake tans. But Cassie is doing this to show us that these are the stereotypical girls, and stereotypical girls are annoying and boy-crazy and not to be trusted. Clary is short, remember? She’s Not Like Other Girls.

Also, what is the deal with Jace? I’m legit confused. I’ve never seen a man so attractive that I had to stop and giggle out loud with my friends. We might whisper or text about it, but boys, contrary to popular belief, don’t send girls into tailspins. And if a boy does? There’s nothing wrong with the girl. She’s not dumb for giggling!!!

Ohhh boy.

She remembered the girl in the coffee shop who had been staring at Simon. Girls always got that look on their faces when they thought someone was cute.

Always. We always get that look on our faces when we see someone attractive. Does CC realize that girls are not a homogenous group? And remember, Clary’s not putting herself in the group of girls. She’s too special for that look. That’s for the airhead girls. (This is why it’s totally possible for CC to write Anti-Semitic crap, btw. Bc as we see here, she also writes sexist crap.)

Clary angsts for a little bit about how Jace’s looks are so different from Alec’s “cameo looks” (???) and then daydreams about Jace’s eyes. They have some dumb banter about the girls. Jace explains about Alec being his parabatai which is just a fancy term for fighting partners. I WANT CLARY AND ISABELLE TO BE PARABATAI but these books are sexist so I doubt it but OMG YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS MY SHIP NOW. BC IT’S THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF WHAT CC WANTS AND I DON’T CARE!!!!

*Happy sigh* (this video warmed my cold bisexual heart)

Okay. Back to business. Jace says that the Lightwoods are his adopted family, and they get to her apartment. Jace pulls out the Sensor and explains that it senses demons/demon energy. Who designs these? Why is it the only thing we’ve seen so far that merges magic and tech? Is Elba all a merge of magic and tech? If Shadowhunters can merge magic and tech, why do they use such archaic weapons? Who designs the magical technology? I have so many questions and I’m sure approximately none of them will be answered.

They go into the apartment and all the furniture has been removed. Everything’s weirdly cold, and when she tries to go into her room, the door punches her or something. It’s a little unclear. There’s a giant in the apartment!! Jace tries to fight the giant and rushes Clary out of the apartment. They very cleverly shut the front door, and the giant bangs right through it. Jace falls down the stairs fighting it and breaks his arm, so I guess it’s time for some poorly written hurt/comfort. Also, the seraph blades are disposable??? And you have to name them before using them, and I’m not sure where these names are coming from. Like, you name it, and then a blade bursts out of a hollow tube. I’m honestly imaging these:

Ugh, AP Bio labs were the WORST. Jace tells Clary not to watch bc she’s a child I guess and kills the giant. Then he draws a rune on his skin that heals him, so I stand corrected on the hurt/comfort front. Clary has a random memory of her mother being covered in faded scars that look like Jace’s faded rune, and, even knowing what she does now about glamor and magic shit, goes “oh, but that’s not really what her back looked like.”

I think Clary might actually be really dumb?

Clary’s also fucking shocked that Jace’s arm is healed and it’s just. She knows about runes. She knows about demons and giants and people who are half angel, and this still gets her?

It turns out that the guy isn’t actually a giant, just a former person who was drawn on with a stele. Now he’s one of the Nine Riders, in thrall to a ring…ahem. Forsaken are controlled by the ppl who drew on them with their magic sharpies. Jace starts to go upstairs to check for more, and Madame Dorothea pops out like: “There are more where that came from!” Umm. It’s a pretty small apartment, no? I feel like they already checked everywhere.

Jace gets really confused bc even though he explained to Clary that witches are mundanes who can do some magic not a single chapter ago, he still doesn’t understand how Madame Dorothea knows anything. Dory gets dramatic about the Clave, which I appreciate. They suck. Then Dory tells Clary to forget about her mom, and Clary understandably freaks out. Dory’s all, I’m not getting involved, hun. But then Jace threatens her with the Silent Brothers, and she invites them in. She also drops Jace’s real name, Wayland, and Jace is like, Yo wtf.

Anyway, they go in. The end.

#anti cassandra clare #anti the mortal instruments #book snark #CoB: Chapter 6 #CoB snark

12 notes · View notes

saddvamain · 3 years

Text

Im zooted and I have to vent. I’m so obsessed with the ILJ shit like I’m eating all of it up like THIS is what happens when a bunch of niche internet ppl obsessed with documenting/harassing freaks (misogyny is rampant in this group but when u talk abt a “niche internet group” it is generally a given that misogyny runs rampant) stumble across horrorcow gold: a filthy, odious, Machiavellian psychopath chronically online edgelord who just so happens to be a young woman with large breasts that occupies the same spaces online and she basically put their favorite freak in jail. It’s all so complex like seeing these ppl talk about how Bella used her “female privileges” or whatever and it’s actually true to some extent (like their thoughts about this obvi unnuanced “life on ez mode” misogynistic but that’s why it’s so fun that they’re right like they took the wrong road but ended up at the right destination I love that) Like she has been going through her life exhibiting horrible behavior and getting away with it due to the assumption of innocence for a normal looking young girl. Theres a sort of shared understanding that girls just don’t do this kind of thing, that women are emotionally precious and seemingly immune to whatever school shooter disease is being contracted by men online. It’s easy for her to find other chronically online edgy guys who are so desperate they will go along with her depravity in ways they probably wouldn’t if Bella was a man. Thats what makes this shit so interesting to me too because you see male figures online that are very similar to her but the fact that she’s a girl makes it all so different. It makes her crimes more deviant to them somehow. It’s crazy how she kept up her degenerate activities for so long without consequence. Straight up posting on the internet leaving proof behind of her planning to harass vulnerable people into suicide, killing numerous small animals, killing a dog due to neglect (unclear), posting racially specific gore of ppl being murdered/dead people(we seriously need to start talking about how fucked the internet in general is rn and how much it’s fucking kids in the head like “gore posting” is seemingly a normal thing esp on discord), secretly filming ppl in her dorm, claiming to have sexually assaulted multiple women, having CSAM from 4chan, and a bunch of other crazy shit. And she’s able to just talk her way out of it to authorities when these matters are brought to their attention. Class conversation is actually being sparked amongst these ppl as Bella’s rich parents play a huge role in who Bella is and how she’s gotten away with it to this point. It’s kind of icarian too, like in every way bella was Not Like The Other Girls and spending time on sites like 4chan and the farms and generally surrounding herself with masculine online degeneracy that specifically others women and all these anonymous online degens that she spent time emulating (truly this bitch was just collecting specifically white masculine degenerate traits like rapist, pedophile, racist, misogynist, UNWASHED in caps bc that foot fungus wtf, shit edgelord jokes, displaying serial killer tendencies just the whole nine yards) are rightfully coming for her throat bc she took their game too far. I genuinely think Bella is a horrifying person who will actually kill someone if she doesn’t miraculously transform and that these horrifying traits have been sparked in large part due to thriving online degen spaces that semi ironically promote violence and hatred and political extremism. Not only do these spaces empower ppl with tendencies like Bella’s, but they leave ppl like Bella’s cronies vulnerable to participating in legitimate violence and bigotry. Like she had other people (edgelords but seemingly relatively normal fellow students) in the room as she boiled a hamster alive and then made one of them take a bite. It’s seriously scary like how do u not realize ur involved in something so scary, it’s not ironic filthy frank core degenerate behavior anymore guys it’s time to gtfo. You can’t memeify it atp

#can there seriously be a documentary about this like talking about the edgelord to psychopath pipeline and how utterly terrifying so many on #line spaces are #like the fact there’s only an extremely in depth doc of like wverything known abt Chris #I need more like think piece content abt all of this shit it’s so crazy

1 note · View note

frostironficrecs · 7 years

Note

Any recs for the best frostiron aus? Bonus for lots of fluff or hurt/comfort :)

sdfghjk i know for a fact that this ask has been in my inbox/drafts for over a month and!! anon!!! im really fucking sorry!!! i hope you see this

now, these are some of the more notable and favored aus that i have within the first few pages of my bookmarks on ao3, i didnt poll ppl on their fave aus, so, yeah. i did try to find fluffy or h/c ones in particular tho, so i hope these are enjoyable. also its really very late for me so im just gona give titles, author/ratings/warnings, and summaries again.

Part of Your World- sombified419, T, Chose No WarningsTony hates business meets - HATES them - but he owed Pepper and off they went to Cuba. It was totally worth it, though, when a secluded walk on the beach led him to the love of his life. He couldn't have been happier - even with the slight problem of getting said love back to New York. Loki was primarily a swimmer, after all.

Dollars to Donuts- flailingmuse, T, No WarningsTony texts Loki offering money for Loki to be his personal takeout guy. It’s weird, but so is Tony, and Loki is strapped for cash. The arrangement becomes something more when Tony changes the script and asks him for something else – a favour.

1001 Tales of Once Upon a Time- lucius_complex, T, Chose No Warnings (Slight DubCon at one point, bc of soe noncon-ish kissing.)He could almost feel Steve’s stare burning a hole through his head. ‘I don’t understand Tony, what can you possibly do out of your suit that we haven’t already tried?‘It’s Widow that puts it together first. ‘It’s not what. It's who.'

Borrowed Heat- usedupshiver, T, No WarningsNo, Tony isn’t pleased about the fact that Loki is now a part of the Avengers. He can’t really forgive, he definitely can’t trust, but team is team so he does his best to deal with it. When a magical mishap turns Loki into a dragon – of all things! – it's for some reason still Tony he seeks out for help and protection. So now Tony is stuck with a clingy and demanding dragon for company, until things can hopefully be set right.The rest of the Avengers are not amused, but getting to know Loki in this new skin is letting Tony see the team trickster in a different light. Maybe he’s really not all bad?

Lead Me Not into Temptation; I Can Find the Way Myself- Like_a_Hurricane, Not Rated, Chose No WarningsWhen something ripped a hole in time and space, flavored with a hint of death, shards of the machinations responsible for it fell into the distortion. One shard did land on earth, and Tony nicked it from a friend's lab. The event that followed led someone to him, god or devil, possibly both, who found the mad inventor half-dead in a cave tearing palladium out of missiles. The god or devil, Loki of Asgard, eventually offered him a deal. From there temptation, damnation, and lack of any care for redemption, began to weave tangled webs around both parties, complicating matters considerably.

To Be Your Equal- usedupshiver, M, No WarningsGrowing up an unwanted orphan, to become an outsider with strange powers, Loki wishes for nothing more than to find a place and a purpose in life. When he is hired to help the rather mysterious Mr. Edward Stark with his just as mysterious work, he hopes to have found both.But nothing is ever easy, and even as Loki finds himself drawn to Stark, there might simply be too many things keeping them apart. Loki must decide what he is willing to sacrifice, and what means too much to ever give up...(A word of warning, there is a short sex scene between Steve and Loki but its very easily skippable, which is very much what I did.)

Taking the Fall- usedupshiver, M, No WarningsEveryone expects Tony to end up eaten alive sooner rather than later when he is put in the same cell as the Lyesmith, a man so dangerous even the members of his former gang are afraid to come after him. But sometimes it might actually be wise to just grin in the face of danger.

Innocent Hearts- STARSdidathing,T, No WarningsPrince Loki knows he's not as revered and praised as his older brother, but he still so desperately wants to be able to impress the one Asgardian boy who holds his affections. It just somehow never seems to go to plan.

If You Had This Time Again- dlsTony Stark closed his eyes in a wrecked Siberian bunker and woke up on a demolished New York street. Four years earlier.

Precious Gifts- STARSdidathing, M, No WarningsThor and the other Aesir might enjoy Midgard and the way its people worships them, but Loki is growing tired of such a simple, boring, mortal world. He is also growing tired of the virginal 'gifts' that the mortals keep trying to bestow on him. Loki has no intention of accepting any of them... but, well, that's before Anthony is offered to him.

A Place To Stand- KageOtogi, M, Chose No WarningsWhen Tony Stark finds himself trapped in a parallel universe, there’s only one place he can turn to for assistance: Asgard. Unfortunately, the god that answers his call isn’t the one he was trying to reach, and Tony is left relying on Loki to help him take down Amora before she makes the change permanent and leaves Tony stuck in a world where Steve Rogers never became Captain America, Bruce Banner never turned into the Hulk, Clint Barton never went straight, and Natasha Romanoff doesn’t even exist.

Family Reunions- LokasennaHiddleston, T, Graphic ViolenceWhen a freak accident raises questions about Tony's mortality, the Avengers find out there's a reason why Tony always survives his self-destructive heroics. Tony thinks he has the worst luck with dads and wants to just crawl back to bed with Loki. As for Loki... He just wants his lover to keep his promise and stay alive for a change.And to think, it's all because of Clint's dog.

Thou Shall Not Fall- STARSdidathing, T, No WarningsTony has only ever met one other vampire that likes to have as much fun as he does.

Diece Your Lonely Heart- STARSdidathing, T, No WarningsInside a snowflake like the one on your sleeve, there happened a story you must see to believe.Loki, a Jotun on Mt Jotunheim, was all alone; abhorred and feared by the Midgardians and the Aesir he hadn't seen another soul since he ran away as a child. Tony Stark was a Midgardian who didn't quite fit in with all the Christmas cheer. He needed to climb the Mountain to retrieve something and to get away from all the festivities.Tony was never one to believe in rumors but Loki was never one to believe in miracles. Christmas was just a fairytale and neither of them expected anything else.

String Theory- lashworthe, M, Major ((mostly) temporary) Character DeathIt's 136 years since Tony Stark died, taking with him all the secrets of his genius. Loki Ruser is the new up and coming genius who buys up the old Malibu home of Tony Stark to discover its secrets. He gets more than he bargains for when he discovers the Iron Man design plans, and a sentient hologram of Tony Stark himself. Eventual mature content. COMPLETE.

and thats all they wrote folks!! again,,, super sorry for having this take so long,,,,, aaaaaaa

#Anonymous #frostiron #ironfrost #tonyloki #lokitony #fic rec #fanfiction #marvel #mcu #thor (movies)#iron man #tony stark #loki #alternate universe #au

229 notes · View notes

iheartarrow · 7 years

Text

Random Arrow thoughts

Ok, I'm freaking out a little bit... Someone, pinch me... IS THIS REAL?! This episode of Arrow came straight out of fanfiction. It is too good to be true... yet it is... true... I am overwhelmed and befuddled and feel like a lost puppy right now. Because in this season (especially in 6x03 and6x04), Arrow is apparently, granting wishes and many fantasies of mine have become canon. No one has ever preparedme for this, this is why I'm freaking out, cuz what's next?!...

I know that the other shoe is gonna drop soon enough, and this bliss cannot last forever, that's just the way TVland works, and also, it's Arrow, our heroes can never be absolutely happy for too long, there has to be conflict to further the story along. And the formula is simple - the happier it is in the beginning, the worse it's gonna be later (before it gets better again). So I do know I have to prepare myself for the shit that's about to hit Olicity in a few episodes, probably after the crossover.

Anyhow, going back to 6x04, here are some of my thoughts during this episode..

- It should have been named "Let's get it on..." instead, LOL. How many times did they try to have desert and were interrupted?! Blue balls won't look good on Oliver, Arrow, have mercy!

- The episode opened with a "date", or more like a hookup, BS style. I gotta say, I liked the wig. Blonde Laurel looks like a bitch, brunette Laurel looks wickedly nefarious. I liked that, but why did she need a wig at all, this puzzled me? Or does she think, she looks more attractive to men with dark hair?! What was the purpose of that wig? Not to be recognized?! Well, then she kills people left and right with blond hair, so that's not it, right?!... Oh, I get it... KC wore the wig for the element of surprise, so the fanboys would guess her by her back and pee their pants happy that their beloved BS is back (or should I say, KC is back, cuz their fascination with her, that I will never understand, has become like a cult following). Anyways, this is done for one purpose alone. BS always likes to make a scene with her entrance (yes, she's a bit of an attention whore, didn't you know?!), this time they figured a wig will do the job for her as a "surprise" element. Whatever...

Arrow is already being redundant with BS, considering she's not even close to being the main villain, has no agency of her own and is just another mercenary for hire. As the guys from Slander Ent. pointed out, she's a glorified lackey. Arrow hyped KC's return to Arrow as a villain, so much, but the pay off doesn't match the hype so far. BS's storyline resembles that of LL already. Either give her some interesting storyline, or get rid of her like you did with Laurel. I liked BS at first, but the more I watch her (and as often as I watch her), the more she starts to suck, because there's no moving forward with her story, she becomes a stale character, just like LL had become, before they had to kill her off. Though, in this episode she didn't suck that much, and her fighting improved (though it was Katie's double who gets the credit, the fight scenes were so darkened out, so you cannot tell the double and the actual actor apart, but it was still too obvious Arrow, you cannot fool me). I feel like I have to make my peace with BS the way she is and not expect her to progress. She's here as an eye candy for the fanboys, a consolation prize anyways. But as she still is a small part of Arrow's overall story, I would expect the show to have learnt their mistakes with Laurel (and KC) from the first time around, and not repeat them with BS.

- Oliver and Felicity's date... I think now I know why Felicity calls BS "evil Laurel", because of her timing. Girl, couldn't you murder that poor sap some other time? William picked out the tie and wanted to go to dinner with Felicity, too... Awww, that's so adorable. And yep, the mini-Oliver totally has a crush on his father's girl. I love the relationship Arrow is building between the three of them! Oliver remembering that it's been three years since they had their first date... Squeee!!! "Don't jinx it!" LOL.

You know, I like that Oliver is still a bit nervous on their date. It's a good kind of nervous. He talks about not having been ready for their relationship then, not like he is now. This tells me that he knows, and knew back then too, that this is it, Felicity is "it" - the love of his life. So yeah, he is nervous in a "anticipating something wonderful in your life"-kind of way. Plus, that gorgeous woman is in front of him being all adorable and super sexy. But the status of their relationship is still unconfirmed. He looks at her for answer when the lady asks if they are back together. And Felicity got "the hint", called herself the mayor's girlfriend. It's for us to hear and for the Olicity haters. They are back together, so stop asking the stupid question, m'kay?! Get over it! There's also calmness to Oliver that I love. He's matured, more grounded. I cannot believe how much he's grown as a person. Adrian Chase was one heck of a therapist, LOL.

That nice lady was us, for sure. While she was fangirling over Olicity, I thought it would be funny if the news came out that Mayor Handsome and Miss Felicity Smoak are back together, with a poll attached to it, vote yes or no. LOL Star City ships Olicity. Also, why isn't there a man patting Oliver's shoulder and whispering "Good job on getting your girl back, son!"?!

- Oliver understanding how it was for Felicity when he had to bail on her and was "dangling maybies"... Now you know Oliver. It sucked! And I think he felt kind of alone and bored and useless, while his woman was neck deep in Arrow business and he just had to let her go, do her stuff. I think that is what got to Oliver the most - not being able to be a part of the thing that brought them together in the first place. That's how they met, how they've gotten closer and fell in love - because of Arrow business. And Oliver not only renounced that part of himself, he also renounced the part that allowed them to connect and was the major part of their relationship, it's basis. In S4 we saw how Felicity was struggling to live a "normal" life without Arrow business. She missed that part of her life, that's why they returned to Star City and stayed. Now it's Oliver's turn to be sidelined. He liked living in Ivy Town (on the surface), but after last year's crossover, Oliver realized that his life could be happy without being the Green Arrow, but it will never be full. This season he had to give up the hood again. Except now it's not because he wanted to, it was a sacrifice for the sake of his son. 6x04 showed how much Oliver actually misses being the GA, the action and being usefull, already!

Now, putting a mask on and chasing Felicity in the club, or helping Slade-cockblocker-Wilson... how is it different than being an active member of the team?! I don't get the logic of this. If you're out, you're out, Oliver. No exceptions. He could as well get killed on the mission with Slade, then little William will be the one saying "told you so!". Agrhhh...

- Those kisses... I love those smooches. Felicity, please kiss Oliver more like that! It's super adorable!

- I don't trust Alena. At all. Even after she was shot and was all cozy and friendly with Felicity, I still don't trust the girl. Look, she is responsible for an Argus agent being horribly murdered. And her reaction to that death was telling not nice things about the kind of person she is... Plus, she represents Felicity's past life, a rather dark past. I don't want a constant reminder of that on the show, in small doses Alena is ok, but not as a permanent fixture. Plus, this whole "breaking internet" thing was a set up by Cayden James, so it's obvious that either he gave Alena that shiner and told her to get Felicity involved, or he knew that if Alena smells trouble, she'd go to Felicity for help. And either way, she's a pawn in his game. I feel like if Alena isn't working for Cayden, and she actually is clean, she's still a redundant character, because she doesn't bring to the show any new skill or ability that isn't already an atribute of another character. So why keep her then?! "I thought you wanted to change the world, and look where you ended up..." I loved this burn! Why did Felicity apologize for telling the truth?! Also, this line reminded me of when paralyzed Felicity was hallucinating Goth Felicity. Goth Felicity said the exact same thing to her "you wanted to change the world, look where it got you..." This Alena character reminds me of that Goth Felicity, but not in a good way. I really hope she won't drag Felicity back to old hacktivist habits.

- Why doesn't KC wear her hair up in a ponytail more?! It actually looked nice, certainly nicer than her usual hair down over one shoulder. She calls herself "Dinah", so why does the team insist on calling her "evil Laurel"?! Call her evil Dinah then, she's here as a counterpart of the new BC anyhow, not of dead Laurel. This show has too many Dinahs with same abilities, it's ridiculous, Arrow!

- Felicity spent more than half of the episode in that gorgeous red dress. She looked so out of place in it in that club, and I loved it. It was very funny.

- Felicity should have asked for a backup while going to the club. Or at least telling her team where she's at. It was irresponsible. And later at Helix, almost got herself and Alena killed. Granted, she couldn't have known that it would be so dangerous, but still, she's going after someone who plans on killing hundreds of millions of ppl, gotta think smarter, girl. I get why she would feel guilty. Not only she let out Cayden James, but after Havenrock, if CJ manages to kill so many people, she would feel that it's on her, too.

- I loved Oliver's pep talk. Last episode it was with Diggle, now with Felicity. They both helped Oliver to become the GA. And all that effort is now for nothing, eh Oliver?! Where the hell did Felicity get the idea that Oliver was doing it all by himself?! He never did, well... he tried, but he never succeeded. He was killing ppl, until you and John set him straight (and Tommy's death, too), he was a crappy brother most of the time, super crappy CEO, failed as a boyfriend and a fiance, etc... So let's not pretend that Oliver wasn't a screw up just cuz he got his act together this season, okay Arrow?!

- Helix Dynamics... Nope, not liking it. I got an immediate recall of Fringe's Massive Dynamics,tbh. Plus the name Helix is rooted in Felicity's old life. Also, the name sounds rather ominous, like Kord Industries, where they make all kinds of dangerous stuff that bad guys later steal. I hope Felicity will rename the company, it doesn't roll off the tongue right.

- Michael freaking Emerson is amazing!!! I certainly got an evil Finch vibe from Cayden James. God, he's a cold motherfucker. I do not believe that he "changed" because of Argus keeping him locked in a shipping container. Argus locked him up for a reason, I wanna know what that reason is. He must have done something very very bad to earn such treatment. Lyla isn't Amanda Waller. I would love for papa Smoak to come back and have a hack off paired with Felicity vs CJ. It would be awesome. Also, I had an idea that Felicity will probably go to jail for hacking the vault's firewall (and probably, other crimes too), and Noah might take the fall and go to jail instead of her. It's the only way I see to redeem an absentee father like Noah.

Or Felicity will have to hide and lead a reclusive life until she figures out a way to clear her name with the FBI. Or she's gonna be recruited by the FBI. Either way, it would be interesting storyline and I wonder how it will affect her relationship with Oliver. I have a feeling Arrow might do something similar to what Smallville did with Chloe's character - her leaving the team and just disappearing. Felicity might be forced to do the same. And it won't be Arrow breaking Olicity up, just separating them for a while. Cuz it's Arrow and they can't let Olicity be happy on the background all the time...

If we are correct, then Olicity is gonna get married in the LOT crossover episode. If so, then won't marital privilege kick in then?! Oliver cannot testify against his wife, nor she against him...

- I really hate it when a side character is pointing out an obvious thing that all the fans have figured out long ago, yet the main character haven't got a clue about... I'm talking about Alena pointing out that Felicity should use her chip as an idea for helping people and get her company started. We've been cultivating this idea for 1.5 years, come on, Felicity...

- WTF is Arclight?! Damien's dome was called an Arc, right?! Maybe CJ was working for DD back then when the Arc was being built, and that's why Argus locked him up?! "Arclight" does sound like a cult thing, LOL. And Darkh's zombie population did look like cult followers...

- Loved all the grunting while Oliver dropped on the couch with hands full of Felicity!!! And the ass grabbing, and her hand sliding to his front... This new time slot is paying off bit by bit. Slade cockblocking them was not cool, Arrow!

- Did anyone else have a thought that Diggle's drugs might be provided by Cayden as well? He set up a trap for Felicity in today's episode, Diggle will probably become addicted to that drug, and will be off the team as well. Could be, Cayden will be picking all the team members one by one?

- The only thing, missing from this episode, was the repeat of the glorious line "It feels really good having you inside me...". It was such a right episode with a perfectly set up circumstances to bring that line back. Arrow, how could you miss this opportunity to remind us of such perfect comedic Olicity moment?

- Loved Oliver on the comms. He looked absolutely out of place behind Felicity's computers, but that was the point, and I loved it. The learning curve and the funny Oliver, loved every second of that scene.

This was a very good, solid episode. The reversal worked perfectly. One of my favorites of all Arrow episodes!! This season is gonna be so AWESOME!!!

@almondblossomme @hope-for-olicity @tdgal1 @taurusclh @geneshaven @eilowyn1 @felicitys @nalla-madness @coal000

#olicity #arrow 6x04 #random arrow thoughts #oliver queen #Felicity Smoak

32 notes · View notes

itsyaboisayori · 7 years

Text

Why I’m questioning Sayori

I said I’d make this post so here it is! Even got on my laptop to properly do the post :p I’m just kinda winging this but I’ll try to list out everything I can. If I forget stuff I’ll go back and edit it later so if you’re curious, keep watch! I’ll reblog any time I make edits, at least somewhat big ones.

Also, replies are welcome! I’m open to constructive criticism and anyone wanting to offer new viewpoints. I accept that I’m still learning and nothing is for sure yet. Also tbh anyone telling me I sound like I’m kin is validating as heck so if you’re thinking it then I’d appreciate you saying it ahaha, but please don’t lie to me because you think you know what I want to hear. I want the truth. I don’t want to be a confused mess ;n; And I know all/most of these could be COMPLETELY unrelated to being Sayori fictionkin, but I feel like they’re worth mentioning anyways. It’s more like, a bunch of little coincidences rather than big solid evidence, I’m aware of that and that’s a big reason why I’m questioning and not for-sure Sayorikin.

One thing I realized just a couple of days ago is how, since I was a kid I’ve had this like, ideal thing I guess? how do I put this into words lmao my brain is dumb,, I guess a fantasy, that I’d fall in love with a childhood friend, like someone I’m close with from a young age but strictly friends for a long time. I’ve always been in love with the idea of falling in love with your best friend. And of course that’s what happens to Sayori, due to her programming in DDLC. And if I’m kin with Sayori from other game(s) rather than just DDLC then it definitely could be something unrelated, just a coincidence.

I’m like, really drawn to DDLC?? Maybe just because DDLC is a great game and I love all the creepypasta type stuff behind it all, all the theories and dark shit, and also I think just as a cute dating sim it’d be great anyways (but nowhere near as great). But idk, when I saw it I immediately felt kinda drawn to it but maybe that’s just in my head or for some other reason like the characters look nice or smth.

Also it REALLY gives me feels. It makes me feel things in general. I rarely get genuinely scared from fictional stuff anymore but this game fucked me up. I’m still scared to play it on my own because, even after watching multiple youtubers play it multiple times, it still fucking scares me.

The Sayori suicide scene and her poem- especially the poem- really get to me. I saw people making hanging puns in the previous video before her death so it was kind of spoiled for me but even still, it got to me. And the scene where Sayori is freaking out because you deleted Monika before playing the game REALLY gets to me,, like I just understand that overwhelming, helpless feeling. Especially finding out why she acted that way, it’s so fucking hard to watch that scene and normally I’m not affected by this kind of stuff. So either DDLC is extremely good at psychological horror or I have some sort of connection to the scenarios, whether that be just that I’ve been through similar things and am projecting (not really that I remember though? idfk brains are weird) or ya know,,, I once lived as someone in DDLC or whatever.

(TW self harm/suicide/choking) Probably has no real correlation but when I have panic attacks/flashbacks (unrelated to DDLC I mean) I feel like I’m choking or like I can’t breathe. And when really frustrated I tend to choke myself? Sayori died from asphyxiation instead of her neck being broken, by accident because she used a stepping stool instead of something higher like a chair and jumping off. Btw I’m okay, I never actually choke myself to the point to causing permanent damage or anything, and of course I’m not saying this is like, okay or anything. I know it’s bad but I’ve done it completely on impulse, and this was all before learning DDLC even existed. I’m working on getting better and I’m not going to kill myself or anything, just thought I’d mention this.

I relate to her personality,,, so fucking much. Not just the whole pretending to be happy to make your friends happy thing, but how she is as a person besides her depression. Tbh I feel like a lot of people relate to her because of her depression and how she deals with it, but like she’s so much more than that. She pretends to be dumb but it actually pretty smart. Maybe she’s not the best with words but I think she’s a lot more intelligent than some people think. She’s so cheerful, maybe even annoying, and is kind of the class clown, and is a total weirdo sometimes but it’s GREAT and just,, same lmao. Like “looks like my boobs are getting bigger again >:D” is something I’d say lolol I just love Sayori so much, like idc if I’m kin with her or not she’s still fucking amazing.

Another reason I relate to her but probably is like not at all proof I’m Sayori or anything, just thought I’d mention anyways, but I was kinda like, really in love with my guy friend in high school for years, he’s actually kinda like MC in some ways, like he was kinda popular with girls but not like Popular(tm), super nice and couldn’t directly say no, but he knew I was in love with him (or at least knew I had a crush on him but he probably had no idea I liked him THAT much but hey neither did I for a long time lmao) and didn’t like me back and even started intentionally avoiding me. Like, he would make up an excuse to not give me a hug, like he was late for class, but hugs only take like a fucking second what the hell?? It sucked but like when the player turns down Sayori I Relate.

I just,,,,, want to hug Natsuki like she’s fucking adorable and I want to protect her the most bc she’s like a precious child and she’s obviously abused by her dad. Tbh Yuri is a little creepy and for some reason I don’t like her that much but I mean I’d still hug her. I don’t hate Monika, like it was just her programming to do all that stuff she did so I don’t blame her and she’s p cool and I’d hug her too tbh. When Sayori interacts with Natsuki it makes me feel all warm n fuzzy. Like I don’t think in my canon Sayori and Natsuki were dating or anything, I think I/Sayori am/was just really protective? Idk, thought I’d throw that out there.

I also heavily relate to wanting to be a mediator and wanting to help everyone get along and be happy. I often (try to) play that role in this life. I’m extremely empathetic, so that’s prob why, but I can’t stand when people are fighting or can’t see each other’s point of view. Though it also frustrates the FUCK out of me when people refuse to or just absolutely cannot see any point of view but their own. Maybe that’s not really a Sayori thing but ye

When I look at Sayori I get the same “that’s me!” feeling as when I see my kintypes. Who knows though, maybe in a month or two it’ll fade, we’ll see I guess. But right now it is Very Strong. Like I’ve somewhat questioned being fictionkin with other characters before but I’ve never had the “that’s me” feeling this strong with anyone else. Ruby from RWBY is a close second but I still think she’s just a kithtype.

I feel like having a past life or whatever as someone who was experimented on kinda makes sense?? Maybe I just enjoy horror a little too much but I really think if I am Sayori I’m kin with her like actual her not just the DDLC version of her. The new game hasn’t even been announced yet but I’m so excited, mostly because I feel like I want to learn more about my possible past life I guess. I wanna see if things in the second game connect with me or if it’s just DDLC. But I feel like, if I’ve had any past lives as any humans, they were probably really dark or smth. I kinda have a dark mind I guess and that would just make sense to me lmao, like I’m 21 why haven’t I grown out of my edgy phase, why the fuck am I still really into creepypasta? Damn.

I’ve been kinda obsessed with DDLC lately. I have BPD so it could totally just be a BPD obsession thing and maybe this obsession will fade and someday I won’t care too much about DDLC, only time will tell. Also I’ve had the song Your Reality stuck in my head for a week straight but it may just be a catchy song and I tend to have a song that kinda automatically starts playing in my head occasionally, usually lately it’s been Sad Machine by Porter Robinson (good song btw highly recommend)

Most likely unrelated but Sayori’s hair has been described as “strawberry blonde” on one wiki and my hair is like, light brown but reddish, though it looks more like Monika’s hair, especially because I keep my hair long. I’ve been kinda wanting to cut it but I like having long hair tbh and I feel like a lot of ppl don’t want me to cut my hair haha, though I really wanna get a short wig and maybe wear that occasionally (esp bc I’m non binary and wanna pass as more boyish sometimes, I know society will never accept me as nb bleh but anyways). Though, it’s been said that the reason her hair is short is because it’s easier for her to deal with, but I’m not 100% sure if that’s canon. Though I guess it doesn’t matter much? cuz multiverse stuff n all but, still.

Speaking of her appearance, she seems to not care too much about how she looks, which I relate to haha, especially because of depression n stuff. I mean I have Crippling Social Anxiety(tm) so I do care to an extent but usually I’m like, if someone likes me they’ll like me for who I am not how I look anyways. I don’t feel the need to dress super proper to impress anyone in casual social situations, like making friends or even going on dates (though I’ve only been on a real date like a few times and they were with my gf who I’d already been dating online for a while). And yeah a big reason she’s so careless about her appearance is depression but I think if I wasn’t depressed and she wasn’t depressed we’d still both have that mentality like, we don’t need to impress anyone with our appearance so it’s better to just dress how you want, whatever way makes you feel comfortable and happy with yourself and your body, than focus on being proper and stuff.

Maybe I’m just projecting but man I feel like a lot of stuff I do and my ways of thinking and stuff are very Sayori(tm). I feel like I am so much like her, like she’s so me. Though of course, maybe my reason for being kin with her is purely psychological. Maybe I “became” her after seeing DDLC. Maybe I am her because I relate to her so much. But again, only time will tell. If I still feel like I identify as her (which, currently, I most definitely do) in a couple of months or so, then I guess I’ll start calling myself fictionkin. Idk.

#dc #tw suicide ment #self harm ment #ficitonkin #kin #ddlckin #ddlc kin #sayorikin #sayori kin #ddlc fictionkin #doki doki kin #doki doki literature club kin #hey uh I'm open to suggestions/comments/etc as long as you're not like here to tell me I'm stupid for thinking I'm fictionkin or some shit #thanks #questioning kin #questioning fictionkin #I appreciate help and advice guys

9 notes · View notes