#how naive

[jalapenobee]

oh to be a paralive anime only watching the first ep and thinking nayuta was chronically ill

[parkparks]

you just know melissa’s car is always on empty

[onemorebeforeigo]

I think I miss my friends so much because I lack close people in my current life. I depend so much on them, it’s exhausting for all of us.

Since I was young, I have been picky on who to call my friend. Especially after some of my “friends” started using my weaknesses against me.

Though once I start calling you a dear friend, I don’t dare to leave you behind as you are one of the things I’ve always wished for: a true friend who I can trust…

I’m still paranoid, but when I’m with them I feel free to be myself, childish, carefree and uncensored. Though one move in the wrong direction can break me completely, leaving me sad, frustrated, anxious and more.

Though I never think of leaving them. “They were such good people, so why would I leave them over something so small like this?” My naive brain always likes to think it is unintentional, until it all repeats itself, leaving more damage with every time it has been done before.

Maybe I am a lap dog after all. Always seeking out for comfort from my close ones, and even after being hurt, I’ll return to the owner and apologize for something that isn’t my fault.

Some things never change, and this seems to be one of them.

[thehauntedp0et]

Hearing the children screaming in joy

On the playground

Had brought back memories I never could have imagined forgetting

How childhood had slowly slipped away

To a scarcely hum

In the back of the brain

When it was lost on me, I can’t recall

I just know it is gone

And I am morning it like waking up from a lovely dream.

Becoming

Foggy

Distant

As more time passes

To the point when you knew you had one

But recollecting the events is a near impossible deed.

//childhood is dead

[atinyp1ece]

Poem time, my loves

"How Naive"

When I am alone

I dreamt of egshell white

spacious room,

birds chirping,

And a hot tea

My eyes laser focused on the ceiling stain

But flashes of images reappear

Creaking wooden floor,

Tight hugs,

soft laughs,

and a hot meal offered

The ceiling blurred, I scoffed 

"How naive"

As my heart yearned a little

"How naive..."

- ES, 2024

[elucubrare]

there's this horrible school of attempted literary criticism on here that holds that 1. everything in any given author's work is autobiographical, especially if it seems "real" and 2. those themes seeped into the work subconsciously, revealing something about the author that they're either trying to hide or unaware of themself. it drives me up a wall, since it seems to deny the fundamental skills that make people good writers: the empathy to imagine and portray experiences that one hasn't had oneself and the ability to take one's personal emotional experiences or worldview and fold them, consciously, into the unworked clay of a narrative.

[marciaillust]

your design of me

[mizandria]

people make fun of the "oh you only hate her because she's a WOMAN" crazy feminist mentality but yeah actually you guys do only hate her because she's a woman a lot of times. for every hated female tv character there's ten male tv characters who are a million times worse and still given at least the "intriguing morally grey character" treatment if not straight up praise. for every hated female celebrity in real life there's one hundred famous men who have done worse and don't get half the hate she does. for every hated female politician, for every hated female historical figure, for the women you know in real life and on and on.

[valtsv]

that shitty thing some people do where they compliment something about you, only to take it back and reveal that it was meant to be a joke at your expense when you sincerely thank them for it, used to bother me until i realised that you can just. keep it. refuse to hand that power back to them. they are never prepared to deal with this.

[howlingtothevoid]

I didn't realize your reasons and I didn't know your plans, until I became the same age you were back then and it horrifies me. I wish you had done more so I could prove the world I am right, and I wish you had done nothing to me at all. Isn't it weird how it works?

[rinkaitoons]

Meet the boy who survived🌞🤲

[onemorebeforeigo]

So much hope for a better future with people who mentally fucked me up and I still walk after them like the tiny lap dog I am. Always hoping for the best as it once was

It once was, but it will never be the same.

[saruouka]

Shuori Experiences

[baker-chan-senpai]

second part to my hands post i never posted

[lokiswifeduh]

How we say goodbye

Pairings - Bestfriend!Neighbor!Bucky x Fem!Naive!Bestfriend!Reader

Summary - The reader is moving to go to college and Bucky takes his opportunity to say one final goodbye.

Warnings - smut, p in v, choking, praise kink, naive reader, somewhat of dubious consent. reader is a virgin, Bucky is around 22 and the reader is 18.

Notes - This is somewhat of a modern!au. This is my first time writing smut on here so please don't judge too hard!! Also, let me know if there are any other warnings I need to put up, thank you for reading loves!

WC - 1,960

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"Bucky!!" You opened the front door, revealing your neighbor standing there with some more boxes to help prepare for your move. "Good mornin' doll." He grins, stepping past you as you hold the door wide open.

"You can just put them upstairs beside my bedroom!" You smiled, shutting the door and moving to walk up the stairs.

You were currently packing for your move to college. Trading the busy New York atmosphere for a quaint college town in Connecticut. Not too far, however far enough in Bucky's opinion. But he would never let you know that.

He follows you up the stairs, shamelessly watching your ass sway in your tight black leggings as you took each step.

"Here okay?" He gestured inside your bedroom. You were about to protest, knowing your parents would never let a boy in your room, especially Bucky with how close you guys were. But he moved inside the room before you could object. "Just this once," You thought, knowing your parents weren't home at the moment.

Bucky dropped the boxes on the ground, his shirt riding up slightly. You watched from behind as his abs flexed below the tent of his shirt, keeping your eyes on the v-line of muscle that led right below the hem of his jeans.

"See something you like, doll?" Bucky smirked, making you look up at him with wide eyes. You didn't realize how long you had been staring. A slight blush rose to your cheeks, words suddenly not wanting to form in your mouth.

You had always thought Bucky was attractive. More than attractive as you grew older. Sexy, hot, absolutely delicious. Other more not as telling synonyms.

Bucky chuckled, lounging down on your still-made bed. A white comforter adorned the double mattress. White, frilly, pillows and a couple throw blankets also lay on the bed.

"I'm gonna miss this bed, doll."

You laugh, coming to sit on the edge of the bed, taking a pillow in your arms and placing it in your lap. "You have a bed, Buck. Not even a hundred feet away from mine."

He groaned, laying back on your pillows, "It's not the same, honey." He stretched out. You could feel him watching you as he played with the edge of your white flowery blouse. "I'm gonna miss everything about you."

"Everything about me?" You turned back, loving the way his hand felt against your skin as he rubbed soft circles into the dip of your lower back. "What about me?" He smiled with that devious smirk, "Oh I'll miss you the most sweetheart." You turned back, playing with the pillow as he rose, coming to sit behind you. You were about to turn around when he placed a hand on your shoulder, his mouth so close to your ear you could feel his breath on your neck.

"But most of all I'm gonna miss your laugh," He started tucking your hair away from your neck, bringing it all to one side. "I'm gonna miss your smile." You felt your heart bloom, knowing how much Bucky adored you.

"I'm gonna miss the way you so innocently move your body in front of me without even knowing what it does to me." "Bucky?" "Shhh..."

He moved his hand from your shoulder to right below your jaw, rubbing circles with his thumb around your throat. "You're alright, doll. You're my doll." He started to kiss your neck, making you freeze. "You're always gonna be my doll."

Without warning he pulled you back, making your head plop softly onto the pillows as placed both his knees on each side of your body.

"Bucky!" Your eyes were wide, wondering what had gotten into him all of a sudden. But he only shushed you once again, taking his hand that wasn't on your throat and ripping the frilly pillow you had in your arms away.

"I've wanted to touch you for so long, doll." You gulped, watching his eyes turn dark as he licked his lips. "I've wanted to make you mine ever since I saw Steve kiss you at that party in sophomore year."

"We didn't do anything, Buck. Steve didn't-" "But he took something from me, see, doll." Bucky moved closer, wrapping your legs around his waist, "I wanted to be your first."

He moved his hand, taking your socks off without you even realizing. "Your first kiss," Then placing his hand on the waistband of your leggings, "Your first date." He removed his hand from your throat, tucking his fingers under the band of your leggings and ripping them down your legs.

You shrieked, trying to hide yourself but failing. "The first person who ever got to taste you, doll." "Bucky, I've- I've never." You stuttered only to have Bucky place a finger on your lips. "Don't worry, I'll go slow, honey."

You wanted to object, tell him it was wrong but the tingling sensation you felt in your lower belly made you keep quiet. You wanted more.

Bucky delved down, placing an open-mouthed kiss on your covered pussy. "Ahhh," You arched your back, never having felt these feelings, these sensations before. Bucky only looked up, seeing your heavy-lidded eyes as you watched him make out with your covered clit.

He licked and sucked at your pussy, only satisfied when he saw the substantial wet spot that now soaked your panties.

"P-please Bucky." He stopped, holding both sides of your cotton thong in his hands as he looked up at you. "What, doll?"

"M-more."

He smirked, "What do you want, baby? I need words." You gulped, your hand coming down to clench your comforter in your palm. "I don't know, Buck. Just.. more." Bucky smirked, "That's alright, doll. Don't worry." He placed a soft kiss on your pussy. "I'll give you everything you need."

Without warning he ripped down your thong, a red mark coming to your thighs from the sudden roughness. Placing soft kissing in between your legs, Bucky dove in, licking a long stripe up from your entrance to your clit.

Your back arched once more, feeling the way he sucked, pulled, and licked your clit. You moaned, your eyes falling closed as you tugged on the bed sheets harder. One particular amazing feeling made you grip onto Bucky's hair instead; making him groan into you. The vibrations only spurring you and him on more.

He moved his hand, suddenly urging his middle finger into your entrance, making your eyes fly open as you looked down at him staring right at you. "B-buck, It hurts." Bucky lifted his face from your pussy, licking his lips. "I know, doll. But I gotta loosen you up a bit." You groaned, feeling his larger middle finger pushing in. "It'll feel good soon, I promise, honey."

And it did, once Bucky again started sucking on your clit while slowly moving his middle finger in and out you started to feel something you never had before.

Sure, you had played with yourself down there before. Even tried to sit on the washing machine when Natasha told you that's what she did before she and Wanda got together but THIS?

This was something you had never felt.

"Bucky! Bucky, I think I'm gonna-" "Just let it out, doll," He kissed your thigh as he slipped a second finger in, "Let it happen, sweetheart."

And you did, you felt white-hot flashes of any and everything shooting through your body as your first orgasm hit, making your legs convulse as Bucky worked you through it.

"Good girl." He continued giving you small kitten licks to your clit, "Such a good doll for me." You felt your whole body preen at the praise as you started to come down.

You breathed heavily, aware of Bucky slipping his fingers out of you before moving off the bed to shed his own jeans and boxers.

"Bucky?" You finally opened your eyes, seeing him hovering over you, moving your legs so he was snuggly in between them. "You're so good for me, doll." A soft kiss was placed on your lips.

You bit your lip, feeling the tip of his dick as he rubbed it through the lips of your pussy. You held onto his arms as he positioned his dick to your entrance, looking back into your eyes.

Maintaining eye contact, Bucky started to push his hips down, making you squirm upwards. He groaned, placing a hand above your shoulder to stop you from moving as his other palm placed itself on your hip; keeping you still.

"B-Bucky! S-stop, it hurts!!" But he kept going, rubbing your clit with the hand that was on your hip. "It'll feel so good, doll. Just gotta get it in."

He pushed all the way in without warning, making you shriek as your nails clamped down into Bucky's skin, drawing blood. "Bucky!"

"You're so tight, doll." His voice was husky, his hair now in his face as his eyes shut, "Fuckin' made for me, baby."

You felt tears come to your eyes from the stretch, wanting nothing but to push him off of you. But then when his hips moved out and forward once again you felt a tingling in your lower belly. Bucky was moving his length in and out of you at a rough pace.

The pain had subsided, now you only felt pleasure. His hips snapped as he rubbed your clit. "Here baby, let me show you." He moved your hand from his bicep, making you place two fingers on your clit and moving them in circles. "Keep doing that for me, doll."

You obeyed, watching as he moved his hand to your throat, pressing his thumb and pointer finger to the sides of your neck. Your eyes widened once again as you felt the air constrict.

"Keep rubbing yourself just like I taught you, baby." Your mouth fell open in response to him squeezing your throat. "Just like that, doll." His hips kept snapping forward, hitting that spot inside of you that you didn't even know existed.

Once again white hot flashes of pleasure shot through every single nerve ending in your body. Bucky could sense you were close as he closed his hand a little tighter on your throat, making you speed up the movements on your clit. "Come on, doll. Cum for me baby."

You nodded, wanting to please Bucky. Your eyes shut closed as he sped up his thrusts at an inhuman speed, wanting to make you cum first. "Come on, I know you can do it. You've been such a good girl for me," He moved down, lips as the shell of your ear. "Fucking cum, doll."

And you did, clenching down hard on his dick as your legs shook. Bucky felt you start to orgasm as his cum shot deep inside of you, making him groan as his own legs shook a little on yours.

He let the grip on your throat go, replacing his lips with kisses to the spots he knew would bruise. You felt a heating sensation as Bucky slipped out of you, making you look down as he collected his cum with his middle and index finger.

"Taste what you made me do, doll." He brought his fingers up to your lips, making you taste yours and his cum on your tongue. "Swallow." He ordered, which you instantly obeyed, feeling the sweet yet salty taste go down your throat.

Placing the throw blanket over your two bodies, he collected you into his arms. Bucky planted a soft kiss on the crown of your head, moving his hand to your jaw to make you look at him.

"This is just how we say goodbye from now on, alright doll?" You nod, smiling up at him. "Okay, Bucky."

---

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