#i guess this counts as meta huh

[purrfectlycontent]

so i reread the short story asagiri wrote about how akutagawa met dazai and it got me thinking about why he was so sure akutagawa would help atsushi

"Is there something you want?" he asked.

Akutagawa's heart answered the question automatically. What he wanted. What he craved. What he could never, ever obtain in this pit he called home.

Akutagawa managed to push the words from his parched throat:

"Can you give me... a reason to live?"

“I can.”

The moment he heard the answer, Akutagawa felt a new emotion running through him. If that hatred from before was the first clear emotion he had ever felt in his life, this was the second.

Compared to the hatred, however, this was entirely unexpected, far beyond his wildest imagination.

dazai brought shin soukoku together so they could save yokohama.

he knew they would suit each other despite how different their personalities are— or maybe because he knew their differences would bring them together and cause them to see things from each other’s perspectives.

perhaps one of the reasons why he brought them together in the first place was so they could help each other.

to let atsushi become more confident. to give akutagawa a reason to live.

[withthewindinherfootsteps]

There are a lot of takes and tropes that bother me in the MDZS fandom, but don’t really bother me outside of it, and I’ve been wondering why that is for a while now. And I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s because of the way the MDZS universe, is portrayed, and the roles it plays in the story, when compared to those other pieces of media.

Because one thing I’ve noticed in fandoms I’m in is that people like having hope. Maybe bad things happened to the characters, yes, but surely there are lots of good people out there – maybe if something happens so that the abused character is brought up by them instead, things will turn out well! Or maybe if those people see what’s really happening with the misunderstood protagonist, everything will be ok!  

And it’s one thing to believe humanity is inherently good, or is inherently anything. And it’s definitely understandable that people want to believe that about humanity in a fictional universe, which can often function as a form of escapism But the thing with fictional universes is that they generally skew on one side of the spectrum, whether that side agrees with those views, or not. Pessimistic or optimistic, hopeful or hopeless.

And MDZS... is not an hopeful universe.

Now, that’s not saying there aren’t good people in it, or that we’re left with no possibility things could change for the better – the Juniors precisely embody that  hope! And a lot of the established characters are good people, it’s not saying it’s impossible. But generally, the view on society and societal structures, and the people inhabiting it from the top to the bottom, tends to be quite cynical. For evidence, just look at how all the clans reacted to the situation with Wei Wuxian and the Wen remnants, and how the one person who spoke up about it, Mianmian, was treated. I don’t think MDZS is making a case about how all leaders are corrupt, though some are, but it is making one about how most people will blindly follow the people in power and turn on anyone who opposes that, and how that can lead to mob mentality and false gossip and danger if that leader is corrupt. The fault and the problem is with the structures themselves. 

And because of that, it’s impossible to eliminate one thing that’s the problem. There’s no one person behind the state of the world, though some definitely take advantage of it, so you can’t get rid of Y factor in Z character’s life and make everything all right. For example, there are a lot of stories where Wei Wuxian is raised by the Lans or the Nies, and that somehow makes everything alright. And maybe something similar would work in other fandoms, where there is one nation or group of people that’s the problem – but the corruption here is society-deep. That would not solve the problem – the classism, the mob mentality, the dehumanisation and so on – because that’s how the world is going to be. Likewise, I also see AUs where people found out what the situation really was at the Burial Mounds and everyone went to band against the evil Jin Sect and help Wei Wuxian. But the Jins weren’t the only sect responsible, and if the sects didn’t know the situation before (though some people definitely did), they definitely knew after the siege – who threw the Wen remnants’ bodies into the Blood Pool, again? And that didn’t change their attitude at all. Because the Wens aren’t seen as human (there’s a reason they’re called Wen-dogs), they’re seen as less than that, and they’re seen as not deserving of life. Being ‘innocent’ doesn’t change that. 

Just because a similar premise works in other fandoms, where maybe there is one main thing that’s the problem, doesn’t mean it’ll work in all of them. And it certainly won’t here.

Again, the one person who spoke up in favour of Wei Wuxian protecting the Wens because maybe there was more to it? Ostracised. And in MDZS, people like Mianmian are most definitely presented as the exception, not the norm.

The MDZS world is not kind. And too much of the plot hinges on that for it to be easily changed.

(...And I do wonder if this thinking is a factor in people thinking Wei Wuxian rejects help too, or is bad at dealing with the situation involving the Wens, or the Golden Core, or anything else. Because if the world was kind, surely there wouldn’t be a reason not to ask for support, right? And because of that, people mistake his very sensible (and accurate) view of the clans in power for low self-esteem and being simple unwilling to ask.)

...This isn’t a condemnation of fix-its in MDZS. If you want to write one, great! But understand that in the universe you’re writing about, you can’t remove simply one thing, or one clan, or one person, and make everything ok. A story written with a premise like alternate clan adoption or people finding out what's actually happening can be great, if you remember the constraints of the universe you’re working within.

Some universes are hopeful, others are not. And you can’t have the same trope working exactly the same way in two on different ends of the spectrum.

[propheticpanickingnerd]

Tim!!! The silly :)

Explanation and a little fic under the cut ⬇

So, initially, i was thinking of this as Tim in a casket of his making, him thinking even if he died no one would be there for the funeral and therefore it would be his responsibility to lay himself down on his bed of roses, attend his funeral, live as lonely as he thought he was. And so, dying alone.

But!! I actually really like the Immortal!Tim Aus so it could also be that.

Imagine this: [Death and apathy to death TW]

Tim discovered he was immortal at a younger age than most, neglected toddlers have a high death rate, so he died as a baby. He doesnt remember much, if not for the one and only scar on his neck, easily hidden by his hair. He assumes he broke his neck, falling out of something, but no one was there to tell him how he died, so he will never know. With that, started the deaths. Never any scarring from them, if not for the first one, but he died a lot.

When he turned into Robin, he didn't think to hide that. Sure, Batman has a "no metas" rule, but he has no activated meta gene. He is not a meta. He is just... unusual. So he died. A lot. He always came back, but he thought at least someone noticed it. If only for a bit, anyone noticed his heartbeat stopping.

If he had asked any of the supers he met, they would've told him his heart stopped all the time and they thought he had a mechanism for that, to throw them off his tail, like Batman did. He didn't though, never thought to ask, and so it happened.

The Incident, so to speak. It was another patrol day, going to the docks to bust a drug smuggling, meeting up with Nightwing for some paired patrol for a few hours and go back home. However, they got caught in an ambush, close to the last hours of patrol, just some goons. But, Tim hadn't died in a couple weeks, as he hadn't slept for the same time. And, usually, death takes the same effect as sleeping, if less peaceful. He thought of resting after his shift, actually.

So, really, when the goon, gun in hand, positioned himself to shoot Tim in the head, he didn't think to dodge. His only thought was "Huh, that's an easier way". So he got shot. In front of Nightwing.

But, at the time, he still thought they knew. They knew he died and came back, that the "Dead Robins Club" that he was not invited to was a joke, because they could count the amount of times they died and Tim couldn't. That they knew him.

He wakes up gasping. Not an unusual reaction. Whats unusual about this is that it's dark and he can feel petals beneath him. And that there is little oxygen and he just wasted most by gasping for air.

His next few deaths are asphyxiation. His next many deaths are asphyxiation too, this time with lungs full of dirt.

He doesnt know how much time he spends alive, nor how much time he spends dead. He just knows, far too many deaths passed when he gets out of his grave. So many deaths in fact, he learns a new thing about this ability of his. Dying repeatedly for a long time makes his healing factor only heal the cause of his death. He notes that as he finds his fingertips and fingernails bleeding. He will have to fix that in his next death.

He guesses he can finally join the Dead Robins Club. Having to crawl out of his own grave seems like a good enough reason. Still, his clothes are soiled and torn and he bets the autopsy scars have faded by now. So, all he has to do is fix his grave and prepare a new identity. After that, he can go look for another name Jason used before for him to steal into his new persona.

Would he tell the others he was alive? Maybe eventually, not in the same way Jason did though. But he does feel a bit of joy just thinking ways he could mess with them. It's their fault anyway, for thinking he could stay dead.

[canmom]

the unity thing is a hot mess huh. they will probably find some way to walk back some of it in response to backlash, clarify the install fee if they do commit, and solve some of the cases where it's prohibitively expensive (mostly f2p mobile games), maybe delay the Jan 1st deadline because their 'install detection' tech obviously isn't there - but 'retroactively changing the license' part is the really scary one. especially since this goes against some of the on-record promises made by Unity in the past.

it's kind of impressive how like... one of the cornerstones of the entire modern game dev industry can completely evaporate its trust overnight. this has apparently has to do with the company's IPO, the loss of most of the founders, the ex-EA CEO etc. but regardless of motivation, it's extremely horrible from a game preservation standpoint if we start to see games getting pulled from stores to shield against the new install fee.

this means everyone's going to start looking for Unity alternatives. the obvious one that comes to mind is Godot, which has the advantage of being lightweight and open source. however, Godot's got significant performance issues baked into its architecture, especially in comparison to Unity's DOTS and Burst compiler. by contrast, Unreal is a beast in terms of grahpical performance (not so much CPU-side, it's beaten by DOTS there), but it's anything but lightweight - on my old laptop the editor had a bit of a tendency to swallow up my 1050Ti's VRAM and crash. still, this will probably be a real shot in the arm for Unreal lmao

Bevy is the engine with the most promise imo (pure ECS with the power of the Rust compiler underlying it), but Bevy is immature, and lacks a lot of features you depend on in Unity (which is to say, Unity has some really great tools for profiling and debugging which Bevy lacks, plus Unity has a lot of good built in systems for VFX, shader authoring etc.) particularly the rendering side needs a lot of work. if anything good comes of this, it might be a whole lot more interest in developing Bevy.

for my line of work in VR, if Unity becomes toxic, this is pretty devastating. nearly every game for standalone VR is made in Unity - I feel like I can count the non-Unity games on the Quest 2 on one hand. almost all the pedagogical information out there is written for Unity. so I can only speculate what's gonna happen there. it may be that Unity is able to stay on as the default for Quest 2/3, since Meta has made it so most games are sold on a flat one-time price rather than f2p. of course it does rather depend whether Unity's secret proprietary install-counting tool starts counting pirate installs.

all in all I guess we see how this shakes out but it's kind of a rough thing to happen less than a year after I become a game dev working in unity ^^'

[desultory-novice]

What are a few theories you have to say in regards to the Mirror World?

[Edit: Wow, this ask was well timed! Happy KatAM release!]

M-Mirror World... :shivers:  ... I mean, n-no! Why would I be scared talk about the mirror world?! That's r-ridiculous! :knows that everyone else already has much better mirror HC than me:

Err, in truth though, I do get a little nervous when asked about the mirror world because I really never paid that much attention to it at the time?! It just seemed like a cutesy gimmick for a game and I guess I didn't see the massive potential many other fans saw in it.

When it showed up again in TDX, I was like "Ohhhh! ...Huh." and when DMK returned for Star Allies, I was like "...I guess we're sticking with this now?!" (Speaking of, I was really ambivalent on DMK at the time but have since adopted the edgy boy as one of my blorbos mostly because everyone else seems to kind of hate him/have nothing interesting for him except to have him swear even more than MK -purportedly does? And well, Dess loves an underdog!)

Anyway, I've said it once and I'll say it again (and again and again until I finally finish drawing "Through a Mirror Darkly", the prequel to "Unspoken") I think Dark Meta Knight was a double agent...!

I think he was "working" for Dark Mind only to the degree necessary to overthrow him. Why else would he split Kirby into four equally powerful selves when Necrodeus proved it was indeed possible to simply weaken the powerful, pink, and puffy?! Because come on, he's Meta Knight's shadow given form! Why does that instantly mean he has to be significantly dumber than Meta Knight?! Why can't he be as clever and farsighted as the champion fighter?

Remember how Meta is very subtly implied to have trained Kirby to face off against Nightmare during Adventure? I hold that DMK was doing the same thing, having given up on training his verse's own Kirby. DMK being a secret dark hero would certainly make sense as to why Kirby handily invites him to join the hero party in Star Allies!

(As for why he attacks Dedede out of nowhere, well, I believe he probably has... complex feelings regarding his own Dedede(1))

Err, sorry, I know this wasn't specifically about DMK... Let's talk about the Mirror World in general! It's very... hmm. It's very...unknown?

Trying to piece together (haha...) the mirror world based on the information we have now feels like trying to count sands of grain in a jar from a distance. Or trying to correctly guess the Ancient's backstory as revealed in Star Allies using only what we know in RtDL.

I think, by the time Kumazaki and the team are ready to return to it, we're going to be pretty shocked by what we find out! But as long as we're not interested in correctly guessing something (...that HAL themselves probably don't know EVERYTHING about) but simply want to bandy ideas back and forth about what we know... 

I myself am most interested in a) it's timeline b) the logic behind Mirror World residents c) how/if does it stand on it's own?

If the Dimension Mirror is an Ancient Artifact, and it has all the signs of one, so I don't see any reason it shouldn't be (I even speculated once the mirror's wings could be based on Elfy) then it is OLD. Pre-fall of Halcandra old. In which case, the Mirror Dimension should be at least that old, right? But what even IS "the mirror dimension?"

Because Amaz(e)ing Mirror showed us a series of multiple interconnected worlds, linked by much smaller mirrors. And let's think about the name for a second: "The Dimension Mirror." Why would the Ancients create something that just makes ONE dimension? And the dimension in question is one where everything kinda sucks??? That... doesn't make any logical sense.

I think the original purpose behind the creation of the Dimension Mirror was to, quite simply, make a portal. The Mirror could have been the predecessor to the Lor Starcutter even! A kind of "stargate." Using it, you can see into MULTIPLE different dimensions, and potentially travel to the ones you wish to using smaller gate like mirrors scattered all over the place. (2)

But, like everything they built, the Dimension Mirror was a two-edged sword. And there came si~de effe~cts! We generally know that the Mirror Residents are like "worse" version of the people we've seen so far. So just imagine that everyone who traveled through the Dimension Mirror to get to some other dimension... left a copy of themselves behind? Similar to one of the more grisly theories on how matter transportation might be possible: that the best you could do would be to perfectly clone/replicate someone in a different position, all their memories intact, while quietly destroying the original as they :cough: teleport. BAM! "You" have now been transported!

With that in mind, the more it is used, the more copies are created, and thus... the birth of the Mirror World? It's certainly possible!

Why are they "evil" though? Well... that could be the "side effect" of wicked power developed off of the suffering of baby chinchillas or it could be that they aren't really all that "evil" to begin with.

Again, I argue that Dark Meta Knight is not really evil Meta Knight at all. (You can write the "corruption theory" for the purposes of fanfic or fan ideas or whatever but I WILL tear my hair out if you try to convince me/you believe it 100% based on evidence in game.) I think Dark Meta Knight is simply Meta Knight unleashed.

Shadow Kirby was considered worthy of being the "hero" of the Mirror Dimension. Bloody King Dedede is kind of a jerk but so was regular Dedede in the past. Plus, going by the stomach in the mouth thing, King Bloody seems to still be possessed by Dark Matter so we can't really know what he's like on a good day!

And then there are critters like King Golem, who is almost unmistakably Whispy Woods just built out of bricks and stone.

So, Mirror Residents simply misunderstood? I'd wager so.

But where is it and why does it persist? Those are all good questions that I don't have the answer to. I might have theories down the line... Are there mirror versions of the rest of the Star Allies? I suppose there could be, if any of them hopped through the mirror/got a really close look at it at any point! Do the people created by the Dimension Mirror truly "exist independently" at this point?

I... I don't know. To be honest, I think one really just has to work with the story that is the most interesting to them. Like... going by my theory above, the first Mirror Dream Lander would be DMK, the second would be Shadow Kirby, and the third would be Bloody Dedede, right? Or... is it?

In Dess's Unspoken-verse, Shadow Dedede has been around long before the days of Triple Deluxe and even before Amazing Mirror began. (Although that does make sense, given the Dark Matter thing would place his existence around at least Dream Land 2) So... Did King Dedede see the mirror BEFORE Triple Deluxe or are there Mirror versions of everyone already? Honestly, because the mirror seems positioned in the sky over Popstar, you could say that anyone who's taken a walk on a sunny day has a mirror duplicate out there!

But Magolor implied on Twitter he wouldn't have a mirror duplicate?! Is he just making a joke about his own wickedness/two-facedness? Did HE actually come from the mirror dimension originally or did he already kill (?!) his own mirror counterpart?!

TLDR, I have NO idea. But I think that until HAL comes back with more info N number of years down the line, it's fine to engage in writing whatever mirror HC suit you and continue to come up with fun and interesting mirror versions of the rest of the cast.

Speaking of, I still need to make my Mirror Marx + Magolor...

...

PS: Oh yeah, and are they all MADE of mirrors?! DMK sure seems to be but honestly, what does that even mean for them?! And how was he permanently scarred? Did the piece of mirror that got broken off when Meta Knight attacked him become lost sometime between that and the end of his fight with the Kirbys?!

...Mysteries...

-

(1) The way I ship Meta Knight x Dedede - when I ship it - is entirely under the table. No hugs, no kisses, no confessions, no ceremonies. They don't even admit to "loving" each other in that way. They are just "very important" (tm) to each other. Yadda-yadda-sworn-partners-yadda. But, because I'm me and I enthusiastically love tragedy, I like to imagine that Shadow Dedede and Dark Meta Knight were in love in exactly the way Meta Knight and Dedede weren't.

Keyword "were." Also "tragedy." You can figure out the rest I'm sure. ^_-

(2) So you notice how those portal mirror things kinda sorta vaguely resemble the goal doors? What are the chances that eventually, the Ancients DID figure out portal technology w/o evil twin side-effects and Popstar's goal doors are exactly that?!

[aforrestofstuff]

Chapter 173 Expert Review: The "Hey, my boyfriend saw you across the bar and we really dig your vibe" Edition

The cover makes me so uncomfortable it's like I'm at a party and said something weird just as the music went quiet and everyone heard and they're all looking at me and everyone hates me and I'm so anxious and

Welcome to the Chapter 173 Expert Review! I have completely lost count of how many of these I've done. If you're coming here for a well-thought-out meta-commentary on the hit series franchise anime manga One Punch Man, then look elsewhere because I put a grand total of ten minutes of thought into this post that took me 45 minutes to write.

I hope you're all well. If you're new here from Twitter then yes, I'm really always like this and I apologize. I don't know how to segway to the actual commentary, so um......... here we gooooooo.....

I don't know what I was expecting. Could I have predicted that Murata would yassify Bofoi? Probably. Do I ever want to come to terms with the fact that he did? No.

Shut up I'm not saying anything. I'm not saying anything. I'm not. He looks like he's wearing those really oversized dentures at Party City. His head looks more like an egg than Saitama's. Why does he still look kinda.... no I'm not gonna say it. I'm not. I'M NOT. GET OUT OF MY HEAAADD RAAAAAAEERERARAAAAWW

I'D FUCK HIM!!!! I'D FUCK BOFOI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M TIRED OF PRETENDING HE'S NOT AN ENDEARING SORT OF UGLY OK IM SICK OF IT!!! I'M GONNA DESTROY HIS OLD MAN CERVIX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANNA FUCK HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How many enemies has Saitama made just by existing already. Is this number three? Sonic, God, and now Bofoi? Oh, well, I guess Saitama did fuck up his robots but that was self-defense 100% and it WILL hold up in the court of law.

Oh, okay. Now we have a better idea of the timeline since Saitama became a hero.... only two months???? Dude, I've had packages lost in the mail for longer than that.

I kinda thought he'd been a hero for at least six months. I guess what Garou said about coming back to fuck up the heroes after six months at the beginning of his arc was only a sort of red herring to make it seem like he'd be the world-ending Shibabooby prophecy, but in relation to how long Saitama's been a hero, turns out my guy only fucked shit up for like, what? One month?

Was this just obvious to everyone else except me. I really should've never learned how to read dawg.

THANK YOU Amai Mask for being the "Please explain the plot so readers with the comprehension skills of fourth graders can know what's going on" character in this because I swear to fucking god I had no clue what anyone was talking about.

Also, Ninja Leader makes an appearance as Blast's totally super platonic partner. Supposedly they were "searching for a mysterious cube" together. People these days make up such weird euphemisms for skipping work to fuck each other in a ditch, I swear. 🙄🙄🙄

A couple of things:

Is Blast wearing the Ninja Leader's glasses in the present? Oh, so they really were super platonic, huh.

You mean to tell me bro aged THIS MUCH in two years? 700 days ago he was late-twenties rager at Planet Fitness and now he's a 57-year-old salt and pepper daddy at the gay bar?

I guess it could have something to do with his powers, manipulating space-time and all that. Blast teleports through something that is basically a copy-and-pasted black hole, which could explain why time flows differently for him, but doesn't time slow down near a black hole? So he should be aging slower if anything.

So, did God age him? Is this even the same Blast that came in contact with God? Something something uuuhh time travel something something...

I don't fucking know. This could also just be a case of "Murata doesn't know how to draw people that look their age" although he's been getting better about that, at least... Just seems ODD to me that Blast has aged like an avocado in a manga where characters only seem to look younger as time goes by.

Very noble that he's fighting God alone with the Interdimensional Justice League and their Pocket Dimension Pool Table to protect everyone else. Something still feels fishy about this, though........ especially since he's a deadbeat ass dad in the webcomic. I don't trust a GODDAMN thing this boy has to say. I DONT CARE IF HE'S HOT!! And I think that is so brave of me.

Forrest has a theory and everyone's gotta hear about it a million times until he's proven otherwise.

Y'all already heard me say how God has one-sided beef with Saitama because Saitama broke the limiter God had placed on him, and I suppose that alone is still a decent reason for God to be pulled to Earth, but I still think God's full body (and power) is imprisoned in the dimensional seal Blast was screaming about as Saitama was fighting Monster Garou V2.

And Saitama's habit of fucking shit up as collateral for saving the world is further eroding God's jail cell, so he's unknowingly helping his enemy get closer to him. This fucking goober.

It makes sense because the massive body in the seal looks like a fully-formed person, whereas whenever we see God free, he's always a sort of unfinished skeletal figure. He's incomplete.

Is this another one of those things where it seems painfully obvious to everyone else except me. Y'all are free to hop in my inbox and call me a dumbass if you want.

Final thoughts because this review is already too goddamn long and I wanted to shitpost a bit more but I guess I can do that on other posts because I'm TIRED.

All in all, we really needed a good expo-debrief chapter to put everything in perspective because the Monster Association arc was a load of reveals with not a lot of resolutions. I think the ending was still very anticlimactic because, although we were introduced to a lot of shit like God and Blast and whatnot, none of that was really tied up in a satisfying way, nor left on an interesting cliffhanger. Just more and more questions. Even Garou's arc hasn't ended really, and all the development he and Saitama had gone through was forgotten (for NOW, because of Genos' core, but I digress) so it almost feels like... not much really happened at all. Nothing really ended, it was just a collection of more plot threads beginning.

I wish ONE waited a bit longer to really delve into God and Blast because I think the Monster Association arc could've been a lot more comprehensive and well-paced if it had just been (mostly) contained to what was happening between the heroes and monsters. But I can appreciate how comprehensive the plot is now after the fallout, just... the road to get here was rocky. I lost all the tires on my jeep.

I'm excited for Psychic Sisters.

In conclusion: if you were at the Whole Foods down the street and took a blue bike tied to the railing then you're a fucking bitch GIVE IT BACK!! THAT'S MY FUCKING BIKE!!

GIVE BACK MY FUCKING BIKE!!!!! YOU STOLE MY BIKE!!

p.s. -- I'm still waiting for the Zombiedad and Child Emperor Get Milkshakes Together omake. Murata, pls. Also give my bike back.

Thanks for reading. Please, I need my bike.

[bookish-bogwitch]

20 questions for fic writers!

Thank you @artsyunderstudy, @alleycat0306, @cutestkilla, and @ileadacharmedlife for tagging me in this game!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently 22, but I think of only 16 of them as "real" fics. The others are podfics, the pornbot meta, random stuff I could've just left on tumblr, etc.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

108,039. If you subtract the words I didn't write (like 97% of Birthday Man and add words the AO3 didn't capture because they're in screen shots (like Impulse Shopping with Simon Snow), it's more like 75k.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Carry On exclusively. I did set out to write a Buddy Daddies fix-it fic right after the series finale but abandoned it because (1) I actually just wanted to read BD fic, not write it, and (2) omg, it is so much harder to write for a TV show where there's not an existing written author voice to imitate.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Ready or Not (20,698 words) Kudos: 460

Missing (8,823 words) Kudos: 422 (co-written with @oxi-is-a-moron)

Impulse Shopping with Simon Snow (12 words that AO3 can count, more like 5k in the screenshots) Kudos: 328

Birthday Man (39,132 words, of which about 1k are mine) Kudos: 178

Size You Up (6,850 words) Kudos 133

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! I love getting comment responses and engaging with writers that way.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

That has to be What Eats You, but it wasn't angsty for Snowbaz, only for Lamb. 😂 Ooh, and the ending of Missing was sort of angsty--though again, not really for Snowbaz--but I didn't write that part, @oxi-is-a-moron did. (So it's not boasting to say that it's beautiful 🥺.) I have a WIP idea that's still just a summary paragraph. It's extremely angsty with a bittersweet-at-best ending, and I will only ever write it if I decide it hurts more to keep it in my head than to let it out.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Everything's a Story. Because the ending is Baz pandering to ME.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet, but it's been less than a week since I posted the fandom's first bestiality fic, so we'll see.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes--about half my "real" fics are mature or explicit. I find it very very challenging to write, it takes a lot longer than other writing, I think because my discomfort makes me very self-critical. I've come to realize that the sex has to have emotional / narrative significance for me to want to write it--the one time I wrote a sex scene where the whole point of it was sex, I cringed afterward. (Tbf to baby me, it was my first explicit fic and second fic ever and unbetaed, so whatever.) I guess I can deal with writing smut a little better if it's super cracky but even then, I'd want to keep it brief.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Nope, probably wouldn't. I've thought about "what if Snowbaz time traveled and met Kim and Will from the Will Darling Adventures" but it would be pretty boring my only thought is "they're the same, huh?" (For the record I would read the hell out of that crossover.)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I know of.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! I love collaborating. For WIPfest I finished @facewithoutheart's WIP, What Eats You?. And @oxi-is-a-moron finished my WIP, Missing. And there was Birthday Man, the Simon's b-day round robin with probably most of you reading this. AND @ic3-que3n and I wrote our bizarre tell-all confessional about the pornbots together. And this spring @ivelovedhimthroughworse and I spent a lovely spring day writing to prompts and thought we'd memorialize it. Honorable mention to @ic3-que3n's art in Behind the Magic. Technically I wrote the words (it was CORBB) but the concept was their idea and we did so much scheming and giggling that it felt like co-writing.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Malmage.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

None. I have a long google doc of ideas but don't really think of something as a WIP until it gets is own file and I start writing. I tend to only have 1-2 WIPs going at a time, and right now there's only one, Basil Pitch's Diary. (Of which ~ 200 words are posted but I have 20k+ and plan to start posting after COC.) So, none. If I ever start the aforementioned angst fest there's a good chance I'll bail partway through.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm funny. I'm told I am good at mixing humor and sex and angst. I have come up with some original concepts. I commit to the bit.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

While I might have original concept ideas, I'm weak on worldbuilding. I tend to stick squarely within the canon-verse. I've never written an AU. My only OC was a sentient mop. I've never even written a villain, I don't think. I struggle with making the MCs do things that I wouldn't do myself, for good or bad. (For instance, I've written almost zero love confessions and tend to write around them because I've never love-confessed to anyone I wasn't already dating and even imagining it makes me want to vanish in a puff of smoke.) I am a very slow writer--I'm in awe of people who can bang out thousands of words in a day, or go from idea to execution in hours. If I can manage a steady 200 words a day, not including editing, that's pretty fast. This pace makes it hard to picture writing a really long fic, ever.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've never really thought about it. It could be nice for scene-setting; I love all the Norwegian in @scone-lover's Northern Downpour, it really adds to the atmosphere, and the German in @spockzilla's Twelve Days of Christmas cracked me up. The lack of translations made it that much funnier when I finally looked it up myself, or when the meaning was obvious. (Guten Abend, meine kleinen Twinks!) So--maybe someday?

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Carry On

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Ready or Not. It's the only thing I've written that I've also read for my own entertainment.

Tagging everyone mentioned above, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @skee3000, @thewholelemon, @facewithoutheart, @hushed-chorus, @captain-aralias, and @nightimedreamersworld.

[str8sub4domdudez]

Superboys Part Two Excerpt : Sunwing

Warning!

[Do not take anything from this excerpt as an example of a smart idea. I would not ever advise for someone to depend on their martial arts lessons take down someone threatening them with a gun. It's not smart, and it's very potentially deadly.]

«ж»ж«ж»ж«ж»ж«ж»ж«ж»

Chris and Dick fly through the city on their grapples. Chris has a tendency to float a bit, but quickly learns that he needs to keep tension in his line. It's just like the waterslides – more fun without flying. Chris half wonders if he should have some Blue Kryptonite on, but dashes those thoughts when he tries to imagine seeing the city through dulled senses.

He hears a gunshot and a woman calling for help, so he tells Dick and they head off in the direction of the gunshot and find a woman in an alley standing over a bleeding, unconscious man.

"Are you hurt?" asks Dick. "Can you call an ambulance? We can call for you if you need."

"Yes, please call for help," says the woman. "It's Nightwing, isn't it?"

"Well, that seems to be up for debate," says Dick, and he calls 911 for an ambulance.

"What happened?" asks Chris.

"The motherfucker pulled a gun on me," says the woman, "and I ain't no victim, you know. I used everything I learned from my Krav Maga classes to disarm him and slam his head into the curb."

"We were worried someone got shot," says Chris. "Good job defending yourself. Most people don't put the effort into learning how."

"Yeah well, this is Gotham. You gotta know that stuff. So who are you? You're like a better Nightwing. At least your costume is better."

"You really think so? I like it. Nightwing had it made for me, but we're still arguing over who gets to keep the name. We're both Nightwing."

"Small world, huh. Well you could be Sunwing in this costume. I don't know what you… wait a minute… are you Champion's bodyguard? That Nightwing?"

"Yeah, but don't tell anyone. Batman doesn't like metas in Gotham."

"Well if you're going for fooling the bat, something cheesy you wouldn't choose as your own name might work. At least if he knows you well enough."

"I'll keep it in mind," says Chris. "Sunwing isn't horrible. But I wouldn't want go by anything other than my name, so maybe Batman won't realize it's me. Thanks, uh…"

"Clarice. Clarice Henderson. Nice to meet you, Mister Zod."

"It's Lor-Zod," says Chris. "Mister Zod was my father."

"I thought it was 'General'," says the woman smartly.

"You pay attention to interplanetary politics?" asks Chris, suddenly finding the woman more interesting.

"You kidding? Our moon just got turned into an alien planet! Who wouldn't pay attention? Bunch of meatheads, I guess. I hope you like Earth, Mister Zod.

"I love it here."

Around that time the ambulances and a police car approach and Dick gets off the phone. He pulls on Chris' arm. "Time to skedaddle! Have a great night, Ma'am."

"Okay, you too, Nightwings!"

The duo go on to stop four muggings and a car theft before being stopped by the Dark Knight.

"Who's the copycat?" asks Batman.

"You know your own protége," says Chris.

"I meant you," growls the Bat. "Lor-Zod, I take it?"

"How'd you figure it out so quick?" asks Chris.

"I recognize your voice. What are you doing parading around in that?"

"I had it made for him," says Dick. "You don't like it?"

"Why did you put him in that?" asks Bruce. "Are you hazing him?"

"No! He just– well I couldn't take him around as a Bat if he's going all super and you hate metas, so I thought—"

"—I don't hate metas, I just prefer to be in charge of the vigilantes in my city and metas can be somewhat destructive. No offense, Lor-Zod but Kon-El, in his first six months, caused more collateral damage than all my Robins put together. Not counting the Red Hood's actions of course."

"Of course," says Chris, "Because it's always easy to contrast the two when you ignore their common ground. Tell me, how much collateral damage has Jon-El racked up? Or Kol-El? I'm pretty sure Kon-El's first six months were a difficult time, what with going through untreated PTSD and having no family, mentors or peers facing the same issues. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that his destructiveness was a product of specific factors and not because he's a meta."

"But he was capable of accidentally causing so much destruction because of his super strength and invulnerability."

"I guess most six-month-olds can't bench press small buildings. Either way, I'm kind of insulted you think I'm going to wreak havoc just because I'm Kryptonian."

"It's a general rule, not an absolutism. Wonder Woman has similar abilities and I'm not saying she's destructive. I am saying I prefer to keep things my way in my city. I don't go to Smallville and break Ma Kent's rules and I don't go to New Krypton and break their rules either. If you wanted to patrol with Nightwing, Lor-Zod, all you had to do was tell me."

"Really?" says Dick.

"Really," says Batman.

"I want to patrol with Nightwing," says Chris.

"Good," says Batman. "Of course we'll have to make sure you're really you, you'll have to be vetted for brainwashing, mind-control and pods and you'll have to be washed for lice."

"B!! You're embarrassing me in front of my friend!" whines Dick.

Batman continues, "And of course, once that's done, we'll have to take samples so we have your real DNA and hair on file—"

"—We already have that on file!" says Dick.

"And before you can patrol in Gotham, you have to be trained in various safety methods and your signature modes of transport. I noticed your grappling was a little rocky. You'll have to have a permit while a licensed grappler teaches you."

"That has literally never been a thing!" says Dick.

"And if you're going to be galavanting around with my son at night in skin tight suits, there's a slideshow I think you both need to see."

"I've heard the horror stories," says Chris. "We aren't doing that. Even if we were, I'm not watching the goddamn slideshow, but Nightwing and I are just friends."

"All the same, you must complete all of the safety orientations," says Batman.

"B!! Why are you trolling us?" asks Dick. "Just let me have some fun patrolling with Lor tonight."

"Very well, why don't you two take Lor-Zod to get changed before you finish your patrol?" says Batman, "People say I'm terrifying, but they haven't seen the horrors of gaudy yellow fingerstripes. I can't unsee it."

"You're only saying that because you know I designed it, aren't you?" says Dick.

"Absolutely," says Batman, "Enjoy your night," and Batman disappears into the shadows of the alley.

"Well, I can't enjoy my night wearing this now," says Chris. "He totally ruined this awesome costume for me."

"Does that mean we're saying bye to Sunwing?" asks Dick.

"Bye-bye, Sunwing," says Chris.

________________________

Superboys – Part Two

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19334917/chapters/45993946

[nadekofannumber1]

Nadeko only likes retro games but retro is a constantly shifting status that encompasses more games with time under the label as technology changes, one’s perception of what counts as retro can be partially locked to what year you were born, the PS2 and n64 is something some people would easily consider retro but others believe it’s only anything backwards from the famicon, many could firmly believe that the Atari era is where the retro limit ends.

The year monogatari takes place is non specific because it’s technically should be 2006-2007 but it’s always written as if it takes place in the current year, technically turning several monogatari characters into zoomers but not always shifting a characters traits sense, by getting sent into the future kanbaru becomes more technologically illiterate.

Other characters in a sense don’t need to make that change like araragi who’s always been a loner who kept away from all social including media. Hitagi adapts easily like she’s always done this connecting easily. Higasa entering her Twitter era doesn’t cause any issues as she became more prominent in later arcs instead of earlier arcs. Final example being Sodachi, who was introduced in an even later arc than Higasa but isn’t good with technology due to her past and present.

All these examples show that how a character adapts is partially dependent on how it fits into existing character details but will change if it fits the narrative. Nadeko clearly likes famicon era games but with the shifting era would Nisio consider it to be retro enough to superimpose it on to their character? I’d think he’d at least vauge about it (as he’s known to do), like:

————————————

Its interesting to set up my consoles in my new apartment, I couldn’t bring much but I wanted at least a few to play.

I thought this TV might be too new for a console this old but really all I needed was an adapter and all was well.

Ononoki chan showing up at my door with the cord was weirdly convenient. Maybe I mentioned it earlier.

Yotsugi leans over my shoulder to look at “Bats and Terry” (1987) for the Famicon.

Laying her head into the crook of my neck like a cat she says,

“It has less shapes than I remember.”

“Ah, that must be because it’s not on a CRT tv.”

Those really were more ideal.

“The box oneesan played it on was different I tell ya.”

“Hmm,

If not CRT or LCD then what?”

“It’s nothin complicated Nade-chan, I just watched tha’ show on an ipad.”

Ah, what a critical failure of assessment.

“Well I guess this one is too niche for a remake, I’m not really a modern gamer so it works out fine.”

“No this game is definitely modern.”

“Huh?”

“There’s nothing more topical and modern than this, ‘tennis for two is innovative even now’.”

“Those games are even beyond retro they’re over 50 years old!”

“But they’re derivative, nothing is more retro than the old ball and stick.”

“You mean the ball and sword?”

“Perhaps but jitsu tsuki ball came first.”

“Ah, are you perhaps thinking about RaRa Chan? I getsu.”

“Oh dear, you art right, I derived too much, I may even go back to the tree. Perhaps more is retro than I thought, good thinking Nadeko Chan.”

She nodded sagely, snugging closer she said.

“Finding what makes something retro is an arduous task ain’t it.”

She’s really sliding around accents for this bit,

“I suppose that it would depend on what you were born wouldn’t it?”

“What year were you even born?”

“Hmm, I didn’t give it in otori right? I suppose it’s-“

“Bzzzt!” She states, making an X over my face with her arms.

I hear myself die in game, I’m entirely bewildered.

“What was!-“

“You can’t state the year the story won’t make sense otherwise.”

This kind of meta break didn’t require me dying…

“Deepest apologies Nade-San… I’m sorry for this character break, I’ll do anything for forgiveness.”

….

I don’t have much to say to that since she just does that anyway.

…

It’s rather shameless.

“Well if the year is 20XX shouldn’t I be born in uhh…”

Wait this might not make sense,

no I thought it was 19XX, but!

“You’re better than 19XX, not that IQ means anything.”

What does that even mean, is that an English pun?

Batsubatsu is more a sound at that point isn’t it?

“It’s the reiwa era so shouldn’t I be born in 20XX and it be 20XX at this point?”

“Terrybatsu is an interesting way to look at it.”

That was terribaltsu,

“Similarly shouldn’t 100 be closer than 20?”

“I suppose but we aren’t really grilling with it.”

Let’s put that aside

“Teori might be closer than toori to terry.”

I was never good at language

“I wouldnt want to refer to that chicken when even even thinking about about batsuterry, I’d rather grill him.”

“Tari for Tori?”

“I’d gatekeep him that hard, yes.”

This is decoying the point by now,

“It’s a neo era not a retro era, so maybe it’s time to consider consoles others grew up with as retro by this point.”

Hmm, really I’d say that:

“Fantasizing about the past is hard, huh. It’s strange to look at the past in a way.”

“The 1980s don’t exist anymore, not even for batsu. I guess it’s came closer to yasu than batsu, baseball goes beyond batsu even.”

But for batsu and terry shouldn’t it be baseball and not banana?

“It’s bananas I tell ya!”

…..

I suppose this is the punchline in a way.

Or maybe the opposite of one, a batsu-d batsu.

————————————

I wanted to be semi authentic with this so I tried to add puns that don’t translate, puns that do, and an extended bit about concepts of translations that don’t fully work

I’m writing this before I actually finish writing down everything so let’s see how much ends up applying

I use an amount of gorowase because I thought it might work

026 (rei-to-ro) retro

20(ni-o) neo

82(ba-tsu)

89(ya-kyu) word for baseball

83(ya-su) word for useless

87(ba-nana) banana

84(ya-shi) palm tree

And for my “gorowase that don’t actually work or don’t think work”:

19(i-kyu) a joke about IQ ( the pronunciation of I isn’t “eye” but “e” like “ichi”)

20(too-rei) a bad pronounciation of terry for a bit that doesn’t entirely work but also toori is a Japanese word that as toori ni roughly refers to “in a similar way”

100(ta-rei) also a joke on the pronunciation tare is also a general term for sauces that go with grilled food

Yakyu is a Japanese word for baseball

Jitsu getsu ball: is one of the earliest versions of bilboquet (ball and small tree) and translates to sun and moon ball roughly and I think that just puns nicely to the alt reading, getsu also sounds like get you

Otori means decoy

CRT: is used as shorthand for critical in table top games and their spiritual successors rpgs

A CRT tv is an old style of television that has a lot of interesting differences from the modern lcd screen but for the sake of the bit at the beginning, what nadeko was referring to was the better definition of older games, if you see how retro games looked on CRT tvs vs how they look on modern LCD screens there’s a good amount of difference, many swore old video games looked better in their childhood and there’s actually a decent chance they did since these games were built for that specific TV, if anything I highly recommend looking at comparisons and seeing just how different many looked, while old games were pixelated it’s important to consider why sprites look like that and it makes some parts of the aesthetic make more sense, the lcd versions of retro experience is kind of dishonest in a sense as the tv would literally smooth out edges and preform effects that don’t translate well, while crt shaders do exist many times it’s not totally accurate as it’s an emulation of the base function of a television that worked entirely differently so its something to consider. Anyway nadeko is a retro otaku and would totally have this information

Outside of that I ran with the reading of “X” being batsu, which can Be thought of as the word bats (in either sense), batsu as incorrect or penalty, as epilogue/postscript, batusbun being afterword, clique, or even circumstance.

Bats and terry: classic shonen baseball manga with an old game, works for the bit about bl astonishingly well it’s anime and game came out in 1987 so it’s in nadeko’s gamer range, plus I can run my bit about Kendama with my ball and stick bit

I don’t mention teo the magic planet fin fin solely for the bit bc Im really into the history of pet games and knowing more about pet games but nadeko would probably not, the genre was started by the night trap guy with the technology that would be used to make the funny streamer game facade (which he also made), dogz (1995) game of all time, if tamagotchi is retro so is this because it literally predates it, but nadeko isn’t a pet games person probably. This was a considered pun and I’m leaving in the blurb bc it’s my post

Teori (tadatsuru) is mentioned for the bit on names to pluck and to caress and holds a casually meaningless phonetic resemblance to terry

[kit-teung]

bad buddy fandom getting-to-know-you meme ):)

template by @fiercynn, tagged by @hereforlou! this is exciting, thank you so much for tagging me <3

name and whatever you want to share about yourself

i'm (na)tasha, a freelance artist from eastern europe, i really love mountains, lemons, teal colour and when it's hot as hell outside. you might know me from c-drama/novel fandoms - that's what i mostly draw on my main blog (which i'm being weirdly secretive about, but if you want to know the url you can message me about it off anon)

when did you watch bad buddy/join the fandom?

episode 5 was trending on here and a mutual who abandoned tumblr almost completely suddenly came back to reblog like 15 rooftop kiss gifsets in a row, scream in tags and then disappear again which made me go huh. what's all this then. lemme check out the first episode. and then by the time episode 6 aired a few days later i'd been already all caught up (can't remember exactly but since i have a tendency towards binge-watching i have a suspicion i watched all five episodes nearly in one sitting). for some personal reasons i'd rather not get into i never got a chance to create anything back then when it was airing and after, and so here i am finally joining the fandom more than a year later!

favorite ship(s)

(apart from the obvious) 📢📢📢TONGYOD📢📢📢 !!! also i was never big on crossover ships but then our skyy 2 happened and altered my brain chemistry

favorite character(s)

sometimes it's pran, sometimes it's pat. i don't control the part of my brain that decides which one of them to hyperfixate on out of the blue

favorite episode(s)

(again, apart from the obvious) i really love episodes 2-4 where they get to reunite and just hang out with each other. i love you bus stop shenanigans. also episode 11 because i'm a sucker for beach episodes, especially when they are mellow and bittersweet

favorite scene(s)

episode 8 balcony scene my beloved. inkpa darkroom confession scene and the way love's voice was trembling as she was on the verge of crying. also that bit in episode 11 where pat wakes up alone, goes out and sees pran playing the guitar outside and pran turns to greet him and SMILES SO SO BIG ugh my heart is doing somersaults as i'm typing this

one thing you would change about the show if you could

put pat in crop tops. cmon

what are your some of your favorite fanworks made by other people? 

any of the artworks by @thatgothsamurai, but especially this one

any of the artworks by @shikanji, but especially this one

any of the artworks by @hereforlou, but especially this one

any of the artworks by @kornswasianguyswag, but especially this one

this fanvid, the best fanvid ever that i've accidentally stumbled upon when searching up "bad buddy same page" (i think i was looking for the mock trailer lol)

this fic by @oldlace

this fic by @aroceu

and a special shoutout to all the wonderful gifmakers and meta writers, you guys are the real mvps <3

(if you create fanworks) what are your favorite fanworks that you’ve made?

well, i haven't drawn much bbs fanart yet, but from the ones i've done so far i especially love this inkpa

also pls look at this korn i drew in the bbs discord server

a song that makes you think of bbs (the ones in the show don’t count lol)

does same page count if it technically wasn't in the show ah no wait pat sang it in episode 12 damn it ok this one i guess

idk anything else you want us to know?

this show's name in my native language is a pun that i can't explain

unfortunately i don't really know anyone in this fandom yet (unless.. @aroceu have you done this thing?), so i'm not tagging anyone, but if you're reading this and you really want to do this, you can say i tagged you!

[miniwolfsbane]

OMG, I'm doomed. We're all doomed.

Also HOW LONG has this game even been out?! I've known about it for/played it 3 days counting today! This is crazy!!

...I can't even remember how I stumbled on it? Was it a trailer? an ad? Maybe it was an ad. Huh.

Granted, Rafael looks more fun than Zayne and he's artsy like me, but I am BUBBLY, so I just go for the serious type that I want to make smile and laugh. I guess I'm a clown at the end of the day. ;P

I definitely won't play it straight once I find one I like. It's going to go meta. I made my own Mcguffin, and while I won't divulge too much because I don't want people stealing my idea for a fic/movie/TV show/etc., I am sooo going to tell him he's fictional. (It doesn't matter anyway because it has no bearing once the plot of the RP gets going.) Just hope I can find one that acts normal. I had another character up and they were a goofball. People, PLEASE write THE CHARACTER'S LONG DESCRIPTION! It's not rocket science!!

Edit: THIS GAME ONLY CAME OUT ON THE 18TH (IDK if that's US or international?) AND IT'S THE 22nd TODAY?! What?! For the first time in my life I'm not playing a game 1 year or more after it's release date?!?!

[yourinterestisnotcringe]

i hope this isn't too much, but i'm nosy! do every odd-numbered smosh question :]

Aah! XD Thank you 😌❣️

Here you go (this got so lengthy omg sorry).

1. Ian or Anthony?

The age old question huh?

You know what? I was asked this before (on a more shallow level I guess but it still fits) and I will repeat myself: "Anthony has Perfect Hair and is very attractive to me. But i was very much very intrigued by Ian as a whole from day 1 and that hasn't changed." (quote by me, sometime between july and now)

On a less shallow level: I relate to Anthony a lot regarding lots of things and respect his journey very much. But Ian - idk what it is, I was drawn to him since day 1 and can also relate to him on several levels. I genuinely find him hilarious. I also know/knew and like(d) people in RL that are very much like him. (Or, at least the way he makes us perceive him.)

3. What's your favorite channel between main/pit/games?

I replied to this here.

5. Do you have a favorite Smosh video? What is it?

I just thought to myself: why did I reblog this ask game? Why am I doing this to myself? I generally am VERY bad at answering questions about favorite things. I cheat all the time. I have several favorite Smosh videos, depending on the criteria. But I'm gonna go with the answer that is probably the most boring one:

Pokémon Theme Song from 2005. (rip)

To me it symbolizes a lot of things and without it I probably wouldn't have found Smosh - or I would've, but a lot later. It evokes many good feelings in me and finding it for sure changed some stuff and influenced me, even though I didn't know it at the time. Lot's of momentous things happened to me in 2006, discovering Smosh via this video was one of them.

7. What is your favorite series on Smosh (main channel)?

Let's do This! !! Followed by uh maybe Pokémon in Real Life, Funeral Roasts and Interviewing Exes.

9. What is your favorite series on Smosh Games?

Would you believe me if I told you that I was stuck on this question for like half an hour? T_T I really like many series on that channel and they did so many different things... And in the end it's still a tie. It's the very basic (?) and classic Gametime w/ Smosh and the very uh, basic (?) Board AF :')

11. What's something you want to see come back?

Easy: Let's Do This! :')

13. Do you ship anything/love any friendship pairs?

I'm actually fine with any ships, romantically or platonically. If I watch any combo long enough and imagine them in random situations I can see them as a ship (platonic or otherwise), or a intriguing combo at the very least. I do enjoy content about Ian &/ Anthony, and pretty much other popular combos. A combination I've seen less of and that I love is Tommy + Ian and Courtney + Ian. However you want to interpret this, I love their dynamics and what my head provides me with about them. As a sidenote and apart from any shipping business: Courtney's and Ian's friendship is very very dear to me, if you (general) have any clips/interview/audio/whatever where their friendship is being shown/the topic, feel free to send it to me. I would be so so grateful :')

15. What castmember do you think you are most like?

Ok so I asked my sibling because I wasnt sure about this. And they said: Ian, Sarah (we both miss her dearly and we'll count her as cast for this) and Amanda. I agree tbh.

17. What do you want to see now that Anthony's back?

Summer/Winter Games :')

19. Is there a video/series you really loved when you were younger?

Lunchtime with Smosh! 🥹 (Ian is Bored too..I know, this is cheating ;_;)

21. Did you ever watch Smosh the movie?

Yes! More than once 🤭😆

23. Tell me an unpopular Smosh opinion.

I'm more excited for the concept and existence and bts of Food Battle returning than for the Food Battle 2023 video itself. Don't know if that's an unpopular opinion though. I'm very exited and am looking forward to it very much, and it looks very good. But I enjoy the Food Battle series on a rather meta level and am not as emotionally involved as with other stuff.

25. It's food battle time. You picking a pink frosted sprinkled donut, or some stick-shaped food?

Thank youuu!!

[Smosh Ask Game]

[moriihana]

we can’t fix each other but we sure as hell can enable each other instead || fourteen: probably not the best plan to go to deika

pairing: dabi x disabled!gn!reader

overview: you meet dabi pre-canon because your cat, nugget, literally won’t leave the guy alone. friendship, fluff and (eventual) angst ensue.

chapter summary: meta liberation arc time!! y'all meet ujiko and then get jumped at deika

content: fluff! probably a little bit of angst but idk

word count: 3729

a/n: this was hard to write lmao so it's probably. notvery good

taglist: @iincandescenttt

AO3 link

← previous ; next →

— ABOUT A MONTH AND A HALF EARLIER, BEFORE THE HERO BILLBOARD AWARDS…

“Eugh, that’s fucking disgusting.” You rubbed at your mouth as you hunched over on the ground, groaning while the nausea from the Quirk used to transport the group subsided. “I hate that so much.” 

“Stinky!” Toga whined and scrunched her nose up, shaking her arms up and down in annoyance.

“This is…?” Shigaraki looked around, confused.

“Where’re we now?” Dabi straighted up, holding a hand out to you to help you up as he took in his surroundings. “Nomu…? But unlike any we’ve seen before…” He tilted his head to the side, an eyebrow raised.

“They’re kinda creepy looking. There’s so many…” You stepped closer to Dabi, brow pinched as you eyed the Nomu cases. You practically jumped out of your skin when a voice rang out loudly with an overjoyed laugh. Your head whipped in the direction of the source.

An old man was sitting in a swivel chair, looking at you from over his shoulder. Almost all of his features were obscured by a bright light, the only things discernable being a strange pair of glasses and a busy moustache. “Can you tell the difference?! Once again, you’ve got a pair of sharp eyes, Dabi! Yep, these little ones are nothing like the mid- and low-level Nomu! They’re high end! Super Nomu I could almost call masterpieces! Impressive, huh? They’re my finest work yet!!”

You practically pressed yourself against Dabi, unnerved by the man’s boisterous attitude. He wrapped an arm around your waist, keeping a possessive grip on your hip.

“Doctor, I’ve been looking for you for a reason. I need you to reproduce some bullets I’ve got,” Shigaraki interrupted the old man’s rambling with a frown. 

“You’ve let your hair grow out, Shigaraki! How’re your Father and the others doing?” The doctor ignored Shigaraki’s statement, much to his obvious displeasure.

Despite that, he still answered the question in a fairly patient voice, “They’re fine.”

Compress squinted in the direction of the doctor. “Our doctor, I presume? It’s too bright to many anything out.”

“Stay back!!” The doctor practically shrieked, his chair taking off down the hall. “Sorry ‘bout this, but I wouldn’t recommend coming any closer. When we need to meet face-to-face, I’ll come to you. And if you break this rule, I’ll send you right back to that big old meat grinder.”

“You’re the one who summoned us, you freaky geezer,” Twice grumbled.

“Fuckin’ weirdo,” you muttered into Dabi’s arm.

Dabi sighed, boredom and annoyance lacing his features. “Why are we here?”

“I’d rather not give out my location, so I transported you all here instead. Besides Shigaraki, you’re all fresh faces to me, I guess. We might’ve met somewhere before, though. Like Gigantomachia, I’m one of All For One’s confidants. Daruma Ujiko is the name I give myself, for now. 

“Anyhow, Shigaraki… I summoned you here out of respect for the boss. My life, my tech and my little ones here… I offered them all up to the great All For One. Up to now, you’ve been getting by with just scraps and leftovers of my work. Now, I’ve got nothing against you. I just need to judge if you’re worthy of having all this. 

“Cus so far, you’re nothing. Just a 20-year-old kid palling around with the dregs of society. So what do you have to show me, Shigaraki Tomura?”

You scowled at that, a mixture of indignation and offence brewing in your gut. How dare he say that to Tomura.

“...I don’t remember much about my life before meeting Sensei and you.” Shigaraki tilted his head back as he rustled in his pocket.

“Yeah, I’m aware,” The doctor commented.

Shigaraki ignored him. “And yet… when I equip everyone all over me… my rage just boils over. I can’t help it. Ever since that day… I’ve done a lot of thinking. All I can really remember is Sensei holding me. Before then, I’d been an empty shell—completely hollow.

“So when I have the whole family on me, I feel so sick that I want to vomit, but I also kinda feel at peace… it’s weird! All I’ve got are these fragmented images, yet… it’s like there’s a lump of lead deep down in my heart, providing an endless source of rage that bursts out. It’s like I’ll never feel good again.

“Even if this hero society comes crashing down… even if I rise to rule the underworld… that weight in my heart is never gonna go away. It’s why I hate everything. Every living, breathing thing just rubs me the wrong way. So why not destroy it all? Why not destroy everything? I know you see it too—the beautiful horizon just waiting for us. So lend me a hand, won’t you, doctor? Heaven and Hell both—I’ll show you all of it!”

You smiled softly, turning your head to look at your best friend, who had a slightly manic grin on his face. He’s really turned into such a good leader. I’m proud of you, Tomura.  

However, your smile dropped as a vicious rage overcame you when Ujiko burst out laughing. 

“What a childish daydream! Saying that with such a straight face was quite impressive!! Very well, Shigaraki Tomura! I’ll help you out, so show me you mean it! Prove to me that you can make your villainous pipe dreams a reality!!” The doctor’s laughter continued.

Fucking asshole. Laughing at Tomura and calling him childish… ugh. If we didn’t need him and I didn’t value not being obliterated, I’d punch him in the face.

“So easy-going…” Compress mumbled.

“Tomura-kun seems kind of disturbed.” Toga looked a little nervous. She then made a face, puffing her cheeks out in a pout. “Wait… you want to destroy even the things I love?”

“My allies are exceptions. You guys should get what you want in life,” Shigaraki huffed.

“Woo-hoo!” Toga jumped up excitedly. Your anger fizzled out at the girl’s genuine joy, an fond look on your face. Dabi scoffed with a shake of his head.

Ujiko’s laughter quieted down to giggles as he spoke up again, “You’ve passed with flying colours, Shigaraki!!”

“You were testing me?” Shigaraki gave him an incredulous look.

“Sure, I wanted to see how much you’ve grown! But the plan was always to help you out… and these little ones are the first thing. As well as some research I’ve put together, all to give you power. But I can’t give you that second thing yet, because without a doubt, you’re all weak! You’ll need to prove yourselves first! The big guy—simple as he is—is a different story. Unlike me, he hasn’t accepted you yet! That’s right. Get Gigantomachia to submit to you… and everything I have will be yours to use as you see fit!”

“Right. This sure has been one looong tutorial.” Shigaraki grinned.

“Do what you want, Mr. Leader, but I ain’t helpin’,” Dabi said. You snorted at his bluntness.

“You’re just pouting cus your fire didn’t work,” Toga teased, smiling at him.

“Shut up, you lu—” You pinched him before he could finish speaking. He sighed, giving you a look before continuing, “I’ve found a good potential ally, so I’m putting my time towards that. I’m not about to go out in a blaze of glory beside our leader, here. I’m looking out for myself, okay?” Dabi thought for a moment, then added, “and Y/N, too. I’m not gonna let them get killed in your quest for more power.”

You let out a huff of laughter. “Thanks, pretty boy. While I can handle myself, I’d rather help Dabi out. Sorry, Shiggy.” You gave your best friend an apologetic smile.

“Don’t worry about it, Y/N. It’s probably safer for you to stay with Dabi anyways.” Shigaraki brushed off your apology, then looked at Dabi. “Bring this ally, then. I’ll be waiting.”

“Perfect, Dabi! You can help me test out a high-end Nomu!!” Ujiko said frantically, his loud voice startling you again. “I know just the one! The perfect match for your… let’s say, aesthetics!! You two will get along great!!”

It was Dabi’s turn to give the doctor an incredulous look. “...did you even pay attention?”

 Shigaraki looked at Ujiko. “Well? Go on. Send us back. I’m feeling like I could take on the world right now.”

“One moment—use these to keep in touch with me!” A metal clamp extended towards you, holding a case with seven communicators in it. The doctor said something you couldn’t hear, and the telltale sign of the warp Quirk activating hit you. You gagged as the black liquid poured out of your mouth and wrapped around your body. 

When the warp finished, Shigaraki held up Father, preparing to put it back on his face. “Hey! It’s the return of the future king!” Shigaraki grinned.

Gigantomachia turned towards him with a glare. “A king… must inspire dread. Must be admired. Must be strong.”

— CURRENTLY…

“Talk about the ‘burbs. Not too small, not too big…” Spinner commented as everyone overlooked Deika City. 

You frowned from where you stood next to Dabi. “Reminds me too much of where I grew up. I hate it. I want it destroyed.” 

“Nice atmosphere around here. It ticks me off!”  

“One hour and forty minutes until our oversized friend awakens.” Compress took off his mask. “Making them clash with Machia will require that we fight as well. This will be no walk in the park, I daresay.”

“ Yeesh. Why’d you have to drag Y/N and I into this? They aren’t even a fighter.” Dabi rubbed the back of his neck in annoyance. Twice shot his measuring tape out towards him and he leaned backwards, tugging you back by your hood at the same time.

“Hey, Giran brought you into the fold too!” He shouted.

“Like I care?” Dabi drawled with a roll of his eyes. You elbowed him, muttering a quiet ‘be nice.’

“Someone’s coming!” Toga suddenly warned. Dabi stepped in front of you, igniting his palm as everyone prepared to fight.

“Not another step! I was ordered to guide you down into town!!” A hero stopped in front of them.

“A hero?! I don’t recognise this one…” Spinner made a face. You hummed in agreement.

The hero put his hands on his hips. “If you want a face-to-face with the Liberation Army’s commander… then you’d best follow me, okay?!”

You narrowed your eyes. “I don’t trust this…” you murmured. Dabi extinguished his palm and stepped back, wrapping an arm around your waist with his usual possessive grip.

“Stay next to me, mouse. Don’t leave my side, got it?” He warned quietly in your ear. 

You nodded. “I won’t. Promise.” 

Shigaraki ordered everyone else to stand down. “Fine. Lead the way.”

As you all walked after the hero, you took careful note of everything around you. It was dead quiet, absolutely nobody to be seen. A heavy unease settled on your shoulders and you pressed closer to Dabi, who kept his arm tight around your waist. His other hand was in his pocket as he kept an eye out for any sign of trouble.

“Not a soul around...” Compress commented. The unease you were feeling could be heard in his voice.

Shigaraki glanced up towards a roof, pausing when he saw someone standing up there. “This whole city, huh?”

The hero touched his thumb to his forehead with his pointer finger aimed to the sky. “This place isn’t usually my turf, but today’s a big exception!” As two figures approached them, the hero bowed and slid off.

A man with styled black hair and glasses stopped in front of them, pressing his thumb and middle finger together. “Thank you for making the trip, and welcome! This is a day of celebration, and you are the guests of honour. Shall we start the festivities?” He snapped his fingers. “This is the Metahuman Liberation Army’s revival celebration!”

As soon as he finished snapping his fingers, people jumped out from every direction.

Oh, this isn’t good. 

You stayed next to Dabi’s side as promised, despite the fact he just standing there with one hand still in his pocket and the other on your waist.

“That’s Hanabata, leader of the Hearts and Mind party!” Compress exclaimed.

Spinner jumped out of the way of an attack. “Is he some big shot?!”

“Yes! Someone who could easily have 110,000 followers!”

Oh, this really isn’t good. I’m not equipped for this kind of attack! I’m an excellent fighter, but not against this many people! Especially with my manoeuvrability issues and the fact my Quirk is for healing! You pressed yourself closer to Dabi as they watched Compress and Spinner. “Dabi,” you breathed, “I’m one hell of a good fighter, but I’m not this good. I’m gonna end up slowing you down.”

“I ain’t leavin’ you, so it doesn’t matter whether you’re gonna slow me down or not,” Dabi snapped. “Get on my back, we’ll get somewhere where there’s less of these fuckers, then you and I can figure out what the hell we’re gonna do.”

You clenched your jaw and nodded, hopping up onto Dabi’s back. He hooked his arms under your thighs, then took off to find a safer spot.

“We’ve already established that you have to stay with me. There’s clearly a lot of these guys. You have your knife.” Dabi set you down once you were both relatively in the clear. “You don’t have your cane—which is fuckin’ stupid, no offence, doll—but now you have a free hand, so it works in our favour. You’ll be able to dodge better. Just keep your eyes open—I’ll watch your back.”

“You’re sure you’re fine with keeping an extra eye on me?” You frowned.

“Doesn’t matter either way, mouse. I’m not letting you out of my sight.” Dabi’s tone made it clear he wasn’t budging.

“Okay then, that’s settled. Next move…” You walked around a bit, scanning your surroundings, then stopped. “Oh shit, is that Shigaraki over there?” You squinted in Shigaraki’s direction

Dabi shrugged. “If our dear leader’s racking up bodies, then I’m going all in too. Hanging back and taking the pacifist route was never my style, anyways.”

You snorted and turned back to him, amused. Your amusement faded to alarm when you caught something in the sky above Dabi. “Dabi, move!” 

He turned around to see what you were looking up, then jumped backwards just in time as someone came crashing into the ground. His forearms were incased in ice that formed into the shape of hands. “Ice, huh…?” 

“And a little bit more.” You pointed out the other Meta Liberation Army members behind your new opponent. “Think you can take them all out at once?”

“Who do you think you’re talking to, mouse?” Dabi smirked, then addressed the ice-user. “Ice… sure, then. I gotta warn you, I think I’ve gotten stronger. Which means I can tell, you’re tough too.”

“Y/N… the League’s healer. Disabled, so your ability to move is hindered. Is that why you’re never alone? And Dabi… those blue flames make you the League’s only wide-range attacker. But why don’t you unleash your fire straight away?” The ice around the man’s forearms crackled and extended upwards, lifting him up with it. “It’s almost like you’re waiting for something… or do you have an issue with your meta abilities?”

Dabi clicked his tongue in annoyance, though his smirk never faded. “Wouldn’t you like to know! Fine. Consider this a freebie, just for you. Ice melts.” He unleashed a blast of fire at the ice-user. You watched as it destroyed the ice pillars that the man had been using.

“Is that so? Well, that could be a problem.” The man’s voice was almost sarcastic as he fell backwards. “Since you seem to be unaware… I manipulate ice. All ice.” There was a rattling sound, then from every direction, ice began to move towards the man. “I’ve been perfecting this meta ability for a lonnng time. Longer than most heroes. So no school for me. The Grand Commander helped make me stronger.”

“Sounds like you’ve led quite a life! But kinda sad!” Dabi ignited his forearm again.

“You’d best not think your little campfire can melt my ice!”

You grinned as Dabi let off a blazing inferno, a sadistic pleasure gleaming in your eyes as the Meta Liberation Army users that had been standing on the ground screamed, then were reduced to ashes. 

“Dabi!! A little moderation, please!” Compress’s voice rang out as Dabi’s flames raged around them. 

You laughed at that. “Dabi doesn’t know moderation, Mister! Haven’t you met him?” You called back.

Dabi let off another inferno at the ice-user. He grinned as the ice melted away, ignoring the sizzling of his skin and the smoke coming away from it. “Mine’s bigger and you’re outmatched elementally. Your precious ice is almost gone.” 

You aren’t being careful enough, pretty boy. You thought as you narrowed your eyes at the evidence of Dabi’s Quirk wreaking havoc on his body. You placed your hand on his arm and activated your own Quirk, ignoring the searing pain that started to blaze underneath your skin. The burns that had been creeping down past his surgical staples healed, manifesting onto your skin instead. You disregarded the sound Dabi made when he realised what you were doing, finishing up healing the damage.

Before he could say anything, Compress’s voice cut him off. “If you are winning so easily, then lend me a hand!!” He had ended up behind the two of them, frantically dodging the attacks being hurled at him left and right.

“Why should I help?” Dabi drawled.

Compress gasped, “Are you so unfeeling?!”

“Nah, I mean, just ask them.” Dabi pointed to the side. You followed where he was pointing, and almost laughed out of shock. There was an army of Twice’s doubles swarming.

As if they were waiting to have been noticed first, all of the Doubles started talking at once. “Dabi!! Mr. Compress!! The Twices are here to save the day!!”

“What about… your trauma?!” Compress said, his voice almost drowned out by the sea of Twices. 

“Love and courage were just what the doctor ordered!” 

That’s… really sweet, actually. And also really Twice-like.

“That doesn’t clarify things, but… this feels like a heroic origin story. Though you’re still a villain.” Compress shook his head a little.

“What good villain wouldn’t wanna save his friends?! There’re so few of you, so you’re even more precious! Hah!! Hang on… am I stupid? Why don’t I double Dabi?! I’ll double you guys too! Forget “League,” we’ll have enough guys for a whole villain nation!!” Twice’s Doubles were almost rabid with excitement.

“Maybe dial it down a little bit, Twice! Remember we still need to wear Machia out!” You interjected. 

“Oh. How long until the big man wakes up?”

Compress rechecked his pocket watch. “One hour, five minutes!”

“No prob! Toga comes first, then! I’ll ask me where she’s at, and get her some hel—” The Double was cut off as the ice-user unleashed a massive wave of ice shards, destroying all of the doubles in its path. 

Dabi stepped in front of you, creating a wall of fire to protect you from the blast. “Does this town manufacture ice? Something’s fishy here…”

The ice-user refroze one of the ice shards that had melted on Dabi’s arm. “As I mentioned… I manipulate ice!”

“Ah… I see how it is.” Dabi eyed the patch of ice on his scarred arm. You peered over his shoulder to see what he was looking at.

“That includes controlling the ice’s temperature! By shooting some ice into the water supply and cooling things down, I can extend my power to that water as well.”

“Why not lead with that? So obnoxious.”

“In the future that our Liberation Army foresees… one’s rank in society will be directly tied to the strength of one’s meta ability. Elevating ones ability will be the only way to really live! Beyond that sheer strength… life has no value!” The man raised his hand up, ice exploding out of the ground—simultaneously taking out more of Twice’s Doubles while also sacrificing his comrades.

You narrowed your eyes at the ice-user. “You’re real full of yourself.”

“Sounds miserable. I’m gonna need you to die.” Dabi’s mouth curled down in a frown.

“The one who will die is you, blueflame. I can smell it from here. Your body is burning away. Keen observation of the enemy’s meta ability is fundamental, and your festering skin looks ready to slough right off… you can’t fight for long, can you?! Not when your own flames eat away at you! If it weren’t for your little friend there, your body would be reduced to char from the inside out.” The ice-user stared down at you both.

Your lips pulled back into a snarl and you stepped out from behind Dabi, glaring up at the man. “Say one more word about his Quirk, imply one more thing about him being weak, and I will gut you,” you spat, twirling your knife in your hand. Dabi placed his hand on your shoulder, squeezing it.

“Calm down, mouse. You can gut him la—” Dabi paused as the ground began to tremble. “...he’s early.”

“Good for us.” You kept your glare on the ice-user, a cruel smile replacing your snarl. “We’ve got a lovely little gift on his way to Shigaraki—who, by now, is probably with your beloved Grand Commander. He won’t stand a chance.” The ice-user seemed to panic at that and he took off before Dabi could send off any more blasts of fire. “Good fuckin’ riddance.” 

“...that icy freak. I almost managed to burn him up,” Dabi grumbled, wiping his cheek with the back of his hand. You sighed at the blood that smeared onto it.

“You really need to be more careful,” you murmured, taking his head into your hands and healing the cuts on his face. 

Dabi scowled. “You’re one to talk. Look at your skin.”

“Huh?” You looked at the backs of your hands and frowned at the burn marks that had manifested there. “Oh. They’ll heal. It happens.”

He shook his head at that, clearly still displeased. “...c’mon. Let’s get somewhere safer, mouse. We can wait until the boss lets us know what’s up.”

“Yeah. Alright.”

[systemhead]

oversharing [gotcha!]

I like oversharing in posts online. I miss the Finsta age of Instagram in 2012-2017 when everyone would do it. It's annoying to sincerity post and go on and on about yourself online. But where else do you do that sort of thing nowadays? And it makes you self conscious when you start doing it 1-on-1 with people too often. Therapists only work for the meta stuff anyway.

It's really easy to forget yourself, or versions of yourself, or parts of yourself. I feel like this gets overlooked a lot by people speaking about themselves and addressing any pop psychology concepts. I forget who I am a lot. I forget who I've been to some people. I forget skills I have or things I've done. Maybe it's because knowing all of yourself all at once all the time is unnecessary if not maddening. Sometimes when I remember some of the things I've forgotten about myself I feel like a sleeper agent who has been in deep cover too long, or something. Maybe it's because you lie retroactively, say that you know better now or something, but that was you to some degree.

The only thing I daydream about anymore is getting a bunch of money and giving basically all of it away in the most specific or tax-avoidant way possible and I find that a little depressing.

"Lurker" has been my defining personality trait on the internet, in real life it's "g*y who tries everything, stands out at all parties somehow;" this isn't like, brave or interesting. Silence - Talk too much - Silence as a general pattern. I think of it like 25% curiosity and 75% something else. Anxiety/trepidation. I don't fully understand how people make their internet or irl personalities work to integrate into the hearts, minds, and lives of others. That sounds nefarious. What I mean is, I don't understand how people just get others to listen and share and then keep that rolling. I worry that I am off-putting or intimidating all the time. I signal interest and appreciation very poorly.

I don't expect anyone to read this, especially this far, if you did: wow, incredible. I can start being incredibly cringe now. The above was a test of sorts and I guess we all passed! Huh.

I love everyone I have ever counted as a friend so much and I don't think they realize that I would do anything anything for them if they asked. Only twice in my life have I ever been asked to do something truly serious by a close friend. Money and acts.

I was going to say something here about how a friend and I were being groomed by shadowy forces which is true but sounds like a humblebrag.

I wish I was brave enough to be as brave as the people I know and love. I wish I was more more queer and harder to handle. I would trade any trait I have for courage and confidence. Whatever version of confidence I appear to have is endurance masquerading as surety.

If there was a serious political sect in this country doing mass work right now I would throw everything away in a heartbeat to join them. There isn't, so I haven't. I wasn't built to be an anarchist or a founder of anything. Something in my bones says that we'll be back within 4 to 6 years to that level.

I am not that smart. I am good at improv and putting puzzle pieces together quickly. I have been exposed to very interesting people. This does not make me smart or better than others. If I have ever intimidated you, you have probably intimidated me.

Given the two above though: the level of political discussion in the US has felt permanently stuck in 2016 for years BUT Palestine feels like it could be breaking that trend. 2020-2023 was a regression politically in the way that the early 1980s were. 2016-2020 was truly impressive and felt like something at the time, but fires die down or are put out.

I would do anything to erase the term "tankie" from public record and human knowledge.

This is somethin' new, the casper slide part 2, featuring the platinum band, and this time... (you seriously kept reading? I type like this in my Google doc journal but you actually have the patience for this? kudos)

Transition terrifies me. I wish I felt sure enough to act upon it more decisively. As of now I am taking it at a measured pace that fits into my broader life. The idea of... change makes me giddy. I don't understand how people are so brave. There has been so much I have needed to hear from others. If I knocked back the drinks or just completely removed my oppressive sense of social decorum I would talk off my friends ears until they would probably personally walk me into a doctors office. This happened upon seeing a friend recently by accident. I let something slip and she was accommodating for hours late into the night in the midst of her dealing with more important things and I could not stop apologizing. So many days of feeling like I needed to cry but couldn't, seeing someone in the mirror who I still didn't know. I just wish it were easier to pick a name.

Visiting DC this year felt like being in a radiation zone. That place had such dark energy I just hid in my hotel room. That weekend in NYC last year was the happiest two days of my entire year, and now I think I know why. I'm still in love with Detroit but Michigan can't be home forever.

I hate my voice and that's part of why I love writing like this. So much to say but the moment I start paying attention to my voice I want to shut up forever.

We should just hang out more.

[sleepyowlwrites]

writing a fic that is so self-indulgent is something that can be so personal

last line tag! from @akindofmagictoo @oh-no-another-idea @rainstorminsilver

this is from the meta-portal rewrite

it's now that Kevin chooses to blurt out that he's actually an assassin but don't worry because he isn't going to assassinate anyone. Sunwoo, having just been calmed down on the whole protective instincts front, immediately pushes Eric behind him, which makes him fall out of his chair.

"you said you can sense danger!" Sunwoo yells at Jacob. "how does this not count?"

Haknyeon pushes his dinner around his plate because he's bored by this and Jisung asked Kevin very seriously if he's ever assassinated anyone before.

"no," Kevin admits. "I actually failed the course because you have to kill someone to graduate and uh, I didn't do that."

...

our little prince peeks around Sunwoo and says, "aw, man, of course you don't have to kill me if you don't want to," because he doesn't have a lot of brains but he's got the spirit.

Sunwoo pinches his arm. "that is an assassin!"

"no he isn't! he says he failed assassin school!" Eric shoves Sunwoo out of the way a little and puffs up his chest. "as your prince I officially pardon you for having no intention of taking my life."

"you're super chill about this," Kevin remarks to Jisung. "you're not worried about eating with an assassin?"

"I don't think you qualify, sweetie," Jacob says and points at Eric's downed chair. "pick that up and let's finish dinner in peace."

I guess maybe I should tag Lina, huh @blossom-hwa

[amazing-spiderling]

What’s some of your favorite characters to write and what’s some of your least favorite?

Friendo, please know that I have been staring at this ask in my inbox for a while and always going "HUH." because it feels like such a big question, sometimes I don't know how to answer it. skfdjs

I think, broadly, my favorite characters to write are going to be the ones who have some attribute I've managed to zero in on with some amount of personal understanding. It doesn't have to be a character I think is "just like me", (I don't know that I've felt that about many if any fictional characters) so much as one that I think I have one or two things in common with that I can focus on in a story. I guess the trick is remembering to focus on lots of aspects of their character so I don't reduce them to just that, though.

As for favorites...

From Metal Gear, I really liked writing from Otacon's POV. While he is brilliant and talented in his own right, in a lot of ways he is the best person to have an outside perspective on the crazy things that are happening in his world. Yes, he's an unparalleled engineer and hacker, but he's surrounded by genetically altered super soldiers pumped full of nanomachines, and it tends to put things in perspective. I think that's why Project Itoh chose to write the MGS4 novelization from his POV. Since I often feel like an observer around people who seem to lead more dramatic and interesting lives, I think I find it enjoyable to write stories with a "friendly outsider" perspective.

For Marvel... I think it's *easier* for me to write for Peter Parker, again, some similarities between us I feel I can tap into with ease, but I think its more *fun* to write Wade. He does get to have all the best banter, and if I want to write a joke that isn't actually that funny, well, then it's just that much more in character. I think I prefer writing Foggy to Matt, again, because of that "involved outsider" thing he has going on. He's emotionally involved in a lot of the goings on, even if he isn't in the middle of things (and then sometimes he is in the middle of things, but that's another issue). I also like writing Foggy in Earth-65 contexts because I think a lot of Murderdock comes from what he isn't saying. If we're inside his head and seeing the reasons behind his actions, some of the mystique is ruined. But if we are sitting on Foggy's shoulders, and only seeing the external (albeit, from someone who has a better understanding of Matt than most) we have to piece things together and make more inferences, and that gives me the chance to drop little breadcrumbs and easter eggs and I LIVE for that.

On the flip side, characters I've had little luck with... ugh. Hm. That's really tricky. I think I don't tend to write the characters I don't have fun with, life is too short. Sometimes it's required though, especially when I'm writing with a partner and we're splitting up the side characters, but even then... it can be fun to write characters I hate and go, UGH, THEY'RE AWFUL. (See: Huey from MGSV)

I guess the most difficult would be characters like Elektra, not because I don't like her- but because I think that we haven't got much in the way of real, solid characterization and motivation for her that doesn't revolve around Matt Murdock. (Well, not counting the Elektra movie, so maybe I should just use that as her model from now on lol.) If I'm totally honest, I feel like a lot of the meta I read about Elektra is from people who have pinged some characteristic within her (like I have for my faves) that doesn't ping for me, so I don't find it relatable or interesting to explore. But I also don't want to throw her into a fic just to make her a bad guy so my ship can kiss, you know? And it's just... bleh, it's a lot of homework, so that's probably why I've avoided it. Does that make me a bad fan? Maybe. I never claimed to be a good one.