#i have never slept with my cousin i promise

[perlelune]

Oblivion | Paul Atreides

There used to be beginnings and ends, nights and days, dream and reality, before the haze took over, swallowing every thought, every memory, every whisper of free will.

Warnings: NON-CON, Fremen Reader, Kynes!Reader, Mind Control, Memory Manipulation, Padishah Emperor Paul, Loss of Identity, Brainwashing, Mentions of war and religious fanaticism

This is a dark story. Heed warnings before reading under the cut.

Muad’Dib leads the way. 

It is what the prophecy dictates. That he is the voice from the Outer World. The one who will lead your people to paradise. The one who will turn Dune’s arid desert lands into bountiful, endless green fields. 

But as your eyes rest on him, you do not see the chosen one. You do not see the Lisan Al-Ghaib. You see your friend Paul, broken, lost, his heart shattered into a million pieces due to your cousin’s absence. 

He sits at the head of his bed, shadows fluttering across his delicate features from the glowglobes’ dull orange light. Wide black rings surround his sunken blue eyes, the result of his daily consumption of spice melange. Lank, greasy brown curls hang around his handsome face. A pang twists your chest. He hasn’t slept in days, has barely gotten a full night of replenishing sleep since she left on a maker’s back.

You cannot blame your cousin. Paul’s ascendency to the Golden Lion throne came at a cost. A hefty one. Promises were broken. Trust was destroyed. Only time will repair the damage that was done. Though you carry faith the two of them will find their way back to each other. 

You stir the spice-coffee in the pot, straining the shimmering dark powder before pouring some in a cup. A spicy cinnamon smell coats the cool night air. 

You rise and bring the cup to him.

“For you, Usul.”

A soft smile blooms on his lips as he takes a slow, weary sip.

“You make it so well,” he praises.

You glow at the compliment, returning his smile. Your grandmother used to show you and Chani how to blend coffee beans with spice and herbs. The knowledge never left you. Now, every time you feel troubled or upset, you make a fresh kettleful. A single sip of the familiar brew is enough to alleviate your frazzled nerves. Especially here, so far away from Sietch Tabr, between the strange stone walls of the Arrakeen Keep, you have craved little reminders of home more than ever before.

Fremen belong in the desert, not in peculiar tents made of marble and stone.

Paul’s brows crumple as he studies you. 

“You don’t have to take care of me,” he says.

“I can get another Fremen-”

His fingers latch around your wrist, desperation sizzling under his touch. 

“I prefer it to be you.” He sighs. A bone deep fatigue radiates from the sound. You halt in your tracks. You suppose you could stay a while longer. “Please, stay, your presence soothes me.”

You nod. “I’ll stay, Muad’Dib.”

Relief falls over his features. 

The doors suddenly open, the guards stepping aside to let Stilgar in. He bows to Paul.

“Lisan Al-Ghaib…”

Your friend’s mouth flattens into a thin line. 

“I told you to stop calling me that.”

Stilgar acquiesces. He will never stop addressing Paul with reverence and admiration. None of his followers believes in him more. At times, it scares you a little. While you share the same faith, the fervor with which every Fedaykin is willing to lay their swords in his name can be frightening. Sometimes you wonder if Chani was right. How much will it take to liberate your world? How much blood will require spilling? You’re not completely naive. No war was ever won without a few casualties. Still, part of you hopes the war will end soon and peaceful times will come.

“No sign of her?” Paul asks. 

A contrite expression tugs the older man’s face.

“Apologies, my liege. We scouted the Southern regions this time. We couldn’t find her. She knows the desert well. It is home to us Fremen. She will not be found…”

“...Unless she wants to be found,” you finish, grabbing the empty cup from Paul’s hands and placing it back on the table.

The faint embers of hope in Paul’s cobalt gaze flicker out. Your heart sinks, for both you and him. Though you do not wish to burden him, you miss your cousin too. Her practicality and common sense. Her strength. Without her, a piece of you is missing. A crucial one. Your mother died in childbirth and your father in battle, so both of you grew up together, close enough in age to share secrets and play together for most of your childhood. 

It was Chani who taught you how to summon a worm and ride upon its back for the first time. She is the sister tragic circumstances blessed you with.

Stilgar apologizes profusely once more before taking his leave.

As soon as he’s gone, Paul’s shoulders slump.

“She hates me.” 

You crouch beside him.

“She doesn’t hate you. She never could. She is your quiet in the storm, and you are hers. She will return when she is ready.”

A wry laugh escapes his lips. 

“I have Irulan, my beloved wife, who is likely plotting my demise as we speak. Qizarate missionaries pressing me to take action and purge the non-believers on Aldinor. I am surrounded by foes, everywhere I look.” That distant expression he gets whenever his visions haunt him touches his face. “Blades pointed at my neck at all times, waiting for a sign of weakness to strike.”

You grab his hand, reassuring him, “You also have friends, Usul, who believe in your cause.”

“Fanatics,” he corrects bitterly. 

Your chest swells with worry. You don’t like it when he questions himself as such. His cause is right. He freed Arrakis from the Harkonnen’s iron-fisted rule. He will bring peace to every world in the universe. It is written. It’s the only path forward.

“You are not alone.” His fingers squeeze around yours. Warmth rushes to your face, the realization that you’re awfully close to the Emperor striking you. You adjust the nezhoni scarf covering your hair and rise. “I shall let you rest, my Lord.”

“Stay, please.”

His tone is beseeching. Your gaze swings to the window. There, moon beams pierce through the colorful glass, scattering rainbow splashes of light across the floor. Vibrant stars pepper the dark sky, pearls lost in a sea of ink. It’s pitch black outside. You should be in your own room. Not his.

“Muad’Dib, it’s late…”

His grip on your hand tightens. When he speaks again, his tone is different. Disembodied. Powerful. Its tantalizing echo drips inside your head like honey. 

“Stay,” he mumbles. You plop down on the bed, your body moving on its own, driven by the strange, irresistible thrall of Paul’s voice.

“Usul…” 

He cups your cheeks. 

“Sleep beside me tonight.”

“I’m not her.”

“I don’t want you to be.”

“She should be with me and she isn’t. But you are.” His inflection becomes soft and inviting as he drinks you in. As if he were lumbering through the desert, parched and desperate, and you were a well overflowing with fresh water. “You are beautiful. I never noticed before.” He pauses, tracing your bottom lip. “Perhaps I should have.”

You blink, dazed. When did Paul’s face get so close to yours? You can outline each of his long lashes, the speckles of green lingering in his blue eyes. 

“Paul-”

His mouth grazes yours, his thumb stroking your cheeks. It only lasts a few seconds. The warm plushness of his lips on yours yanks you back to reality. You gasp and flinch back. When you recoil, his silky tone fills your ears once more.

“Don’t fight it. You love me, remember?”

A confused whisper slips through your lips. Two parts of your mind wrestle with Paul’s words. 

“I do?”

His eyes dive into yours.

“Of course, you do.”

“Of course I do,” you repeat, his tone nudging aside the doubts lurking inside your mind. 

A bright smile unfurls on his lips, his lids sagging to half-mast.

“It’s like you said before. You are my quiet in the storm and I am yours.”

Right. You uttered those very same words. How could you forget?

You are Paul’s quiet in the storm. He is yours.

His mouth covers yours. It moves slowly against your own. He explores your mouth as he cradles your face. His long lashes fall over his cheekbones as he loses himself in your taste. He hums against your lips, gentle fingers touching your face. You don’t move, eyes half-open as you let it happen. It’s foreign, the sensation of Paul’s lips on yours. Foreign and strange yet you can’t help but numbly accept it. 

Once he frees your lips, he rests his forehead against yours. 

“Come into my arms, my love,” he says.

You don’t resist as he pulls you into his embrace, nudging you onto the bed. Soft strands of Paul’s brown mane brush against your cheek as he buries his head in the crook of your neck, inhaling your spice-coated scent. 

His arms circle your waist. Your back melds against his chest, the warmth of your bodies mingling through the thin layers of your clothes. 

“You smell so good,” he mutters. Your scarf shifts when he rubs his face against it. “Don’t ever leave me.”

When you don’t reply, his tone gets firmer. “Promise it.”

The words roll off your tongue easily.

“I won’t ever leave you, Paul.”

Tension leaks out of his tightly coiled muscles. 

“Good,” he says, drifting off to sleep quickly with you nestled in his snug embrace. 

You fall asleep too, no thoughts in your head, Paul’s soft snores lulling you into peaceful slumber. 

You awake with a start, the stark unfamiliarity of the palatial chambers you find yourself in causing your pulse to soar. Your eyes dart about the room. Recognition hits you. These are the Emperor’s apartments.

Your eyes grow wide. You’re not supposed to be here. Panic sets in.

“W-What am I doing here?”

Paul’s quiet voice flows across your back.

“Calm down.”

“No. I shouldn’t be here…”

You start crawling off the bed but Paul’s fingers around your wrist impede your departure. 

He holds your face, vibrant blue eyes locking with yours. You find yourself incapable of looking away, ensnared by his unflinching focus.

“I said, Calm down.”

The alarms ringing inside your head fall quiet. You lean into Paul’s touch. What were you doing? What were you thinking? Every thought you attempt to grasp at evaporates in the heat of Muad’Dib’s stare. 

“There. Much better,” he coos, satisfaction hovering on his handsome face. His voice sinks into a sensual whisper. “Why don’t you kneel for me?”

You do as he instructs. Then all fades to black as quicksands of confusion engulf your thoughts. 

When you return to yourself, you aren’t on the bed anymore, but on your knees on the carpeted floor. 

Paul is looming over you, grunting, his throat bobbing. One of his hands is curled around your nape while the other is under your jaw. 

You note the saltiness coating your tongue, the drool on your chin, the soreness in the back of your throat. 

You choke on his length, air wavering inside your lungs. 

Paul’s cock is in your mouth. 

The sick, awful realization tumbles over you like a bag of stones. 

Muffled moans leave you as you lift pleading eyes towards him.

You place your hands on his thighs, shoving with all your strength. 

Paul doesn’t let you move. He cradles your face and thrusts inside your mouth until his balls are pressed into your chin. 

Clouds of lust obscure his gaze as it falls upon you. 

He caresses your face, dragging his cock out before pushing it inside your mouth again. Gurgled sounds leave your throat. Tears skip down your cheeks and you wonder when you’ve started crying. 

Fremen do not cry. Ever. Even for the dead. It is a rare, sacred act.

Paul wipes them off your face with his thumbs. 

“You love me. It is what lovers do,” he says matter-of-factly.

Your body relaxes. 

Right. Of course. You love him. It is what lovers do. 

You hollow your cheeks and suck him off. He unleashes a throaty sigh of delight as you pleasure him with your mouth. 

When his seed drips down your tongue, he coaxes you not to waste a single drop. You swallow all of it, showing no resistance when he nudges a stray drop between your wet lips. 

Several days in a row, you awake in the emperor’s chambers. At first, you experience great confusion. However, Paul’s soothing words always quell your rising panic. It becomes all you know. The Emperor’s mesmerizing voice. His large, soft bed. His ceaseless, ravenous touch. 

Sweaty, tangled limbs melting in lewd harmony.

You stop questioning it. Even the strange lapses of time when you are in one room and mysteriously wind up in another. It isn’t rare for you to wake up with the Emperor’s head bobbing between your thighs, greedily lapping at your folds, or with your hips grinding into his as he impales you on his cock. 

It is where you belong. And you believe him when he says that, mumbling loving promises into your ear in the dead of night.

“If we do not strike fast and hard, they will not accept your rule,” Stilgar says. 

“They worship a false god. We are doing them a favor,” another man sitting at the table interjects. 

A shaky exhale flows from your tongue. You look around, dismay filling you when you realize you’re in Paul’s war room amidst a council meeting. Your head throbs. How did you get here?

You rise from your chair. Bemused gazes land on you. 

Princess Irulan snickers from her seat.

“Husband, your concubine is acting strange,” she sneers.

Concubine? You step away from the table.

You blink several times as you stumble outside. You grip your temples, your forehead scrunching. That cannot be right. Is it? 

You are no one’s concubine. 

You are…

You are…

Adrenaline pumps through your blood as your head buzzes. 

The answer will not come, your mind keeping it under firm lock and key.

Frustration mounts within you. You blindly waddle around.

You end up in a room that bears vague familiarity. You lean against a basin full of water. Water…just lying around. That seems strange.

Your eyes land on a mirror on the opposite wall. The reflection in the glass has your heart rate spiking. Who is this?

You bolt to your feet, the water in the basin splashing around your feet. 

Your tremulous fingers rise to your face, horror filling you when the woman in the mirror mimicks your exact motions. 

Your gaze travels across the wide, open space. Quick breaths rush from your throat. The Emperor’s room. Why did you think it was your room? 

You stagger backwards. You gasp as you bump into a solid form.

You whirl, eyes widening.

“Paul.”

He gauges you, slight concern etched in his blue eyes. Relief fills you as you soak in his boyish, slender features, much more familiar than those of the stranger in the mirror. 

You know Paul. Muad’Dib. Paul is familiar, safe. You trust him. He will tell you who you are.

“Yes, my love?”

“Paul, who am I?”

A displeased frown settles on his brow. He approaches you and grabs your face. His expression hardens.

“You are mine. Nothing else matters.”

“But Paul-”

Your protests are stifled by the feverish press of his lips on yours. A fog surrounds your thoughts as his kiss grows more passionate, his hands sweeping over your curves. You place your hand on his chest, pushing feebly.  

“Forget it. Forget it all, beloved,” he mumbles against your lips. You sag against him. You drown in Paul’s blue eyes, time stretching beyond eternity. 

When you gain a semblance of awareness, your naked form is writhing above Paul’s. Your palms are spread over his lithe muscles, your hips moving as he slams his cock into your cunt repetitively. Paul bites his lip, his gaze glued to the sight of his length disappearing between your wet folds. 

When did you get on the bed? When did you shed your clothes?

Every inquiry melts in the heat swirling across your damp flesh. 

Your lashes flutter as you unleash a broken whimper, Paul’s hard length touching you in places that send electricity rippling through your spine.

You tighten around him and he purrs. 

“Remember nothing but my name,” he rasps, clutching your hips possessively. He impales you on his length, thrusting faster. You choke on your breath, his quickening pace driving you wild.

You brace yourself on his chest and lose yourself in the pleasure, your breath hitching each time he pounds into you.

The filthy sounds of your coupling fill the room, bouncing off the stone walls. Paul’s deep, animalistic moans. Your soft, desperate whimpers. The blunt, wet sounds your cunt makes as he buries himself inside you. The bed rattling and squeaking under your writhing forms.

“Paul, Paul…” you pant as you bounce on his cock. An intensity ignites his eyes as his name falls from your tongue like a prayer. You toss your head back, voice dying in your throat as another wave of pleasure crashes over you. Your toes flex. You tremble, your body jolting as your slick walls flutter around his length. A husky moan leaves him. He twitches inside you. His back lifts from the sheets, his body tensing as he hits his peak too. Slick warmth spills from his tip, glazing your walls. 

An errant sliver of panic lurks inside your brain. Your eyes bulge as you glance down at where your body and Paul’s are conjoined. Rapid breaths burst from your chest.

Seeming to sense your distress, he shoves your hips back down when you try to squirm away.

His authoritative voice booms across the room, unnatural, multiplied. Everywhere at once. 

“Do not move, beloved. Let me fill you up. Make you mine in every way.”

Your breaths settle down. Your worries disappear. You look into Paul’s loving gaze. A smile unfans on his lips as you ride him with abandon again.

“What are you doing?”

You pivot at the abrupt sound of Paul’s voice. You pause above the bag you’re packing. You peer at him, mulling over an appropriate answer to his question. You do not find one. You only know that you stirred awake that morning, feeling strange, sore…Lost. The urge to collect your meager belongings and leave the Arrakeen Keep seared inside you since then. A hollow, distant voice rings inside your head.

Return to Sietch Tabr.

“I have to go. Something…Something isn’t feeling right.”

The muscles of Paul’s jaw flare, his tone as ice as he states, “You want to leave me.”

Discarding your bag, you rush to him. You take his hands in yours.

“No. I made you a promise. I just need time to think…I can’t think anymore, Paul.”

It’s true. Every day feels like trudging through a Coriolis storm, your thoughts scattering as dust in the wind the minute they form.

Everything that was solid before is now sand slipping through your fingers.

Paul’s gaze corrals yours.

“You don’t need to,” he says, gripping your face. His tone dips to a soft lilt that penetrates your senses. “Who are you?”

You search his eyes. A breeze blows away every single doubt you had.

The answer to every inquiry you had is right there. In Paul’s fond stare.

The persistent little voice in your head, that pesky plea begging to be heard suddenly falls quiet. The truth echoes in your head, Paul’s powerful voice filling your mind.

You are right where you belong. 

“I’m yours,” you utter with certainty.

His face softens. “That is correct, my love,” he says, stroking your cheek.

“Now, why don’t you settle down, beloved?” You let him escort you to the bed, coaxing you to take a seat on the sheets. “Agitating yourself as such isn’t good for you.”

He sinks to the floor and drops a gentle kiss over your round belly.

“And it’s not good for the baby either.”

[boldlyvoid]

Little White Lies

18+ Aaron Hotchner x Fem Reader

Summary: Readers sister is having an Engagement/Christmas party this year and her cousin will be there. With her new fiance. Who is reader's ex. The only logical thing to do is to show up with her own new boyfriend... who isn't really her boyfriend. He's her boss.

Warnings: fake dating, mutual pining, idiots in love, flirting, teasing, there's only one bed, love confessions, getting together, oral sex (fem receiving), condom use, p in v smut, meeting readers family

Word Count: 5.3k

She sits in the corner of the jet, facing Aaron in the two-person seat near the entrance to the cockpit. She’s sat there with him on almost every trip for the past 3 years. He’s good company, not too talkative, he gets her drinks and he gives her little smiles every so often. It’s relaxing to sit with him… however, tonight, she’s not in a good mood and he can tell. 

He looks at her all concerned and then looks around at the others to assure they’re all busy. “Are you alright?” He whispers. Keeping her business between them. 

She shrugs, “My sister’s been texting me. Her engagement party is coming up and I promised I’d go but I just found out that my cousin and her fiancé are going to be there…” 

“Do you not like her?” 

She shakes her head, “it’s complicated.” 

“I’m all ears?” He reminds her. 

She sighs, “Her fiancé is my ex-boyfriend. She slept with him while we were still together… I was in the academy and he was apparently lonely all by himself and didn’t have the time to travel here to see me so he fell into her bed instead.” 

“I’m so sorry,” Hotch says, concern all over his face and disbelief in his voice. “That’s awful, why would your sister invite her?” 

“Because my parents are paying for it and all the family gets to go, no matter what,” she scoffs. “It’s to show off, nothing more.” 

“You know…” he tilts his head to the side and his brows go up as he thinks, a pondering look on his face that’s quite amusing. “You could bring someone with you, someone to prove to him that you’ve moved on and you’re in a much better place now?” He suggests. 

“Yeah, like who? Morgan?” She teases, laughing slightly. 

“Or me?” He offers. His brows were still raised but the softest, most sincere look on his face. She’s never seen him look so… so affectionate. So careful. Unless he’s with Jack. This is his ‘I love you like family I’ll do whatever you need me to’ look. 

“Yeah,” she gives in. “That would be nice… it’s December 22nd. Would you be able to take time away from Jack that close to Christmas?” 

“Where is it?” 

“they’re having it in New York, that’s where my sister lives now,” she explains. “I’m taking the train up the night before, I have a hotel room booked but I could stay with my sister and you could have the room for the night?” 

“Could we switch to a double queen?” He suggests. 

She shrugs, “I can call and find out?” 

“Okay,” he nods. “Jack’s with Haley this Christmas, I see him boxing day till New Year's Day and then he goes back to her.” 

“We’ll have to bring him home something,” she suggests. “We can even go a bit early or stay later if you want to go shopping a bit in the city?” 

“He’s always said he wants M&M’s with his face on them,” he teases. “It’ll be fun.” 

“I’ll tell my sister to expect another person,” she says as she pulls her phone out. “Do I tell her you’re my boyfriend?” 

He nods, “Whatever you want to call me, I’ll be it for the weekend.” 

—

She tells him to pack a suit and obviously an overcoat to stay warm in the cold New York air. The party they’re going to is going to be on the top floor of this really expensive restaurant, they’ll have rooftop access and there’s free drinks. It’ll be the fanciest non-FBI party he’s ever been invited to. 

The team doesn’t know they’re going together, everyone has the next two weeks off unless there’s something serious like terrorism or multiple bodies dropping, or a kid going missing. But it’s not often their Christmas breaks get disrupted. So they pack up on the 20th, everyone takes the elevators down to the garage together and they say goodbye before their vacations. 

He meets her at the train station the next day at 11am, their train leaves at 11:20, and he comes with snacks and coffee. Always in dad mode, he knows what it’s like to go on a long trip with someone who’s hungry, it’s not always fun. They have a little booth together, the trains are mostly empty this close to Christmas. Everyone’s either where they want to be already or taking last-minute flights. So it’s quiet, they get to look out the window together and she shares an earbud with him, with her phone on shuffle, exposing him to a whole bunch of new music. 

And she has a nap, head on his shoulder and wrapped around his arm. It’s not the first time this has happened, he’s let her sleep on him on the Jet and they’ve had to share beds in hotels before. He’s hugged her after rough cases and when she’s just sad… she’s his family. Everyone on the team is. He just feels it a little stronger for her. 

He rests his cheek on her head, looking out the window with a smile on his face. Excited to pretend to be her boyfriend for the next 2 days. To have her hang off his arm, to dance with her… maybe even steal a kiss or two to really sell it. And he can’t wait to see her dress, or how she does her hair or if she’s going to wear makeup? She doesn’t get all dolled up for work, but he’s seen her dress up for the bar and events for the bureau and he thinks she is so, so beautiful. Always, but especially when she puts on lipstick and her good perfume. 

He’s been harbouring this little crush on her for so long that he’s not really sure how much longer it can stay a secret. 

They arrive in New York at 6pm. The hotel they’re staying at has a restaurant and Y/N, being the genius she is, booked a reservation for 6:30. They have enough time to put their bags in their room and head back downstairs, but their room is wrong. 

“They told me they could switch to two queens?” She complains as she sees just one bed. A King bed. 

“Did you specifically say two queens or a double queen?” He teases. “Cause a double queen might make them think you want a bigger bed…” 

She groans, holding her hands over her face, “Oh god, I fucked up.” 

He gently rubs his hand on her back, “Hey, it’s okay. I don’t mind sharing for 2 nights, there’s lots of room in there. Plus… it might be good for playing pretend.” 

She smirks, “my boyfriend would sleep in the same bed as me.” 

“and enjoy it,” he pulls her in for a hug and rests his chin on her head while she snuggles into his chest where she feels safest. 

—

After dinner, they walk around the city a bit. She still has to get her sister something and she has a registry at some fancy store nearby. They get hot chocolates and stand close together as they walk, hands brushing each other but not holding, no matter how much she wants to hold his hand. So she rubs her knuckles against his and waits for him to be the one to finally give in. 

It takes a while, they walk down the block and explore two stores but he finally takes her hand in his, fingers interlocked, as they cross the street. And he doesn’t let go once they’re safely back on the sidewalk. He simply guides her towards the store her sister is registered at and they head inside, closer than ever before. 

“Hi, can I help you with anything?” One of the workers asks with a genuine smile on her face. 

“my sister has a registry here,” Y/N explains. “It should be under Lindsay and Connor Higgins?” 

She’s taken to the register and handed a list, everything they want is on it. Some crossed out as they’ve already been purchased, but a decent amount of things are still there. A lot of it is pointless, fancy shit but she likes to think she knows her sister well. She knows what would actually be used by her and what would just be a decoration to prove she had good taste. 

Her sister works really hard at a very important publishing company, she’s gone to work by 6am and home no later than 8pm most nights. She lives on coffee and wine to wake her up in the mornings and relax her at night. So she gets her an espresso maker and some crystal wine glasses. But when she goes to pay for them, Aaron reaches out and pulls the wine glasses towards himself. “I’ll get these, I can’t go without a gift.” 

She smiles, “you don’t have to.” 

“I want to,” he assures her. 

They pay, they get a decorative gift bag each and head back outside to the cold. He reaches for her hand again and she lets him, smiling over at him. “You’re taking this assignment very seriously.” 

“Have you ever known me to slack on the job?” He teases. 

She bumps her shoulder against his, “No, I guess not… and I guess this is helping, it’ll look more real in front of everyone tomorrow.” 

“It won’t be that hard,” he assures her.

“Why, 'cause I’m so loveable?” She jokes, not believing the words that leave her mouth. 

“Yes, actually,” he nods, smiling over at her. 

She just laughs, not thinking he means it as anything other than familial. “Thanks. You’re pretty great too when you’re not telling me what to do.” 

“I don’t boss you around that much,” he laughs too. “Dave teases me all the time about how much nicer I am to you than the others.” 

“Well, I am your best agent,” she shrugs with a proud smirk. “You wanna go back to the hotel or is there anything you want to do tonight?” 

“We can go back,” he agrees, leading them in the direction of the hotel already. “I’m going to need some good beauty sleep to make your ex jealous tomorrow.” 

“Ha!” She laughs, raising her hand that’s carrying the bag to cover her mouth as she giggles. “Yeah, no you don’t. You’re like a million times hotter than him, it’s not a fair fight at all.” 

“Yeah, okay,” he shakes his head in disbelief. 

“What?” She looks at him like he’s crazy. “Do you not think you’re hot?” 

“Not exactly…” 

“I knew you were funny but that’s hilarious,” she jokes. “You’re very, very hot. One of the hottest men I’ve ever seen in my life, like People magazine should be reaching out to you for sexiest man of the year. You’ve been on the news enough times, surely the public will agree.” 

He laughs at the compliment, “Thank you, I guess… I guess I should trust your judgement here the way I do everywhere else.” 

“Yes, 'cause I’m never wrong,” she reminds him. 

They keep joking around, teasing each other until they get back to the hotel. Up the elevator and into their room. They leave their gifts by the door and Aaron lets her take the first turn in the bathroom to get ready for the night. 

She takes off her makeup, she washes her face and does her skincare routine and he knocks, “Are you okay in there?” 

“Yeah, you can come in,” she announces, still fully dressed. 

He opens the door slowly, “You’ve been in here 10 minutes already I thought you were just changing?” 

“Nope, skincare is important,” she smiles at him, massaging the moisturizer into her face. “Want some?” 

He smiles, “Sure, why not?” 

“Wash your face first, get a new face cloth over there,” she points and steps out of the way of the sink. “My face wash is right there.” 

She watches him wash his face carefully, smiling at him through the mirror with so much affection behind her eyes. He’s so cute when he gets soft like this, she could easily see them having a life like this together. Getting ready for bed together, doing their nighttime routines and falling into the same bed. Night after night. Forever. 

Once his face is washed he looks to her, “How much moisturizer do I use?” 

“Want me to do it?” She offers. 

He nods, “please?” 

“Sit down on the toilet lid,” she instructs and he moves over there quickly. 

She opens the jar again and takes a decent-sized amount onto her fingers, she puts the jar down and smiles at him, “It might be cold.” She dabs it on his forehead, cheeks, nose and chin and then starts to rub it in for him. He closes his eyes and sighs as he leans into it. “Like it?” 

He hums, nodding slightly, not wanting to talk incase he accidentally got cream in his mouth. She just smiles, adoringly, loving that she gets to have moments like this with him. “You’re so cute…” she whispers. 

He chuckles, finally looking at her again. She cups his face in her hands, “all done.” 

“You’re cuter.” 

“What is happening here?” She asks, completely serious. “Are you just a good actor or—

“I was in a few plays,” he teases. “But no, I’m not acting.” 

“Do you have a thing for me?” She lights right up. “Oh my god, you do?” 

“And you call yourself a profiler,” he shakes his head. “Yes, okay? I like you. I think you’re wonderful and beautiful and everything I want— is that what you wanted me to say?” 

“Get up,” she says, pulling at him. 

“Why?” He asks as he stands. 

“So you can be taller than me when I kiss you,” she teases. Grabbing him by his shirt and pulling him in. 

The kiss is soft at first, cute and sweet… but then they get needy. Years of close proximity and bubbling feelings and “what ifs” all coming to the surface. He cups the back of her head with one hand and holds her lower back with the other, holding her flush to his chest as his tongue makes her acquaintance. 

She accidentally moans as his hand goes down to cup her ass and he smiles against her. He pulls back slightly, noses brushing. “I can’t tell you how long I’ve waited to do that.” 

“Really?” She can’t believe it. 

He smiles before he steals another kiss, and another and another and before they know it he’s backed her out of the bathroom and all the way to their king bed. He has her on the mattress, hand on her back and the nape of her neck as he cradles her and hovers over her. His tongue on hers, their chests pressed together, and her hands on his back with her nails desperately clinging to the cotton. 

He eagerly moves to kiss her neck and while it feels so good, she’s worried about what is about to go down. Sure, she hoped for this. She thought maybe they’d have a few drinks at the party tomorrow and stumble home and fall into bed together and regret it in the morning but this… admitting to liking each other while completely sober, was not on her mind at all. 

“Aaron,” she whispers, hesitation in her voice. 

He pulls back, “something wrong?” 

“Are we going to regret this?” She worries. 

He cups her face gently, his body weight still on top of her, it’s oddly comforting to feel so trapped under him. “I know I won’t, but if you will, then we stop. I never want you to regret your time with me. I never want you to be uncomfortable with me. I never want to lose what we have… so if that means we never have more than a friendship, I'm perfectly okay with that.” 

“I have tried so hard not to love you for the last year and a bit that we’ve been friends,” she admits. “If we go further and you change your mind, I’ll never recover.” 

“I won’t change my mind,” he says, confident as ever. “I want you to love me as much as I already love you.” 

His thumb caresses her cheek while he talks, he looks at her with the most affectionate look she’s ever seen on him. He’s so handsome all the time, but this look. The softness, his big brown eyes, the way he smelled like her face cream and he kept looking down at her lips like he was dying to taste them again… she’s always believed him when he speaks, but this is different. He’s opened his chest and handed her his heart and he wants her to hold it and keep it safe... forever. 

“I love you,” she admits, tearing up because this is so unreal. “I love you so much, Aaron.” 

He kisses her again, so gently, breathing her in and savouring every moment. Sure, it’s not their first kiss, that happened 10 minutes ago, but this is the first kiss they’ll have being openly in love with each other. 

She kisses him again and again, never wanting this to end. She wraps her legs around him, she holds him closer than ever and he lightly moans against her. She starts to work at his shirt, unbuttoning it so she can get her hands under it. She wraps her arms around him, touching his hot skin as he breaks the kiss and moves down her neck. 

“I love you, so much,” he reminds her again. 

“Show me how much?” she whispers right into his ear. 

He pulls back, delicately looking into her eyes, “are you sure?” 

She nods, “more than I’ve ever been before.” 

He gets his shirt off, and he pulls her forward to pull hers off too. Through kisses and rolling around, his pants are off, then her’s. Behind her, he kisses her spine while he unclips her bra, pushing each strap off her arms with kisses to her shoulders, he cups her breasts and kisses up to her ear again, “lay down.” 

She listens, he gets between her legs and peels her underwear off. Raising her right leg, he kisses her knee and down her thigh, as he gets on his stomach, he looks up at her for permission and all she can do is nod because this seems unreal. His big beautiful brown eyes are looking at her from between her legs as he kisses the most intimate part of her body and she’s in heaven. 

She’s died and gone to heaven. The train must’ve crashed and she’s in her own personalized forever with the man of her dreams…. But it didn’t. This is real and happening and she should be enjoying it. 

She grips his hair, and her back arches as she moans into the contact, he’s so fucking good with his mouth because of course he is? Is there anything this man can’t do?

Full of love and zero expectations or worry, she feels herself getting closer to an orgasm so much faster than she has with anyone else ever. Not even herself. Normally she’s so in her head, so nervous and worried or barely being taken care of… this one just sneaks up on her, trembling through her, she grips his hair a little tighter and moans out his name, “Oh, oh I’m cumming, I’m— oh!” 

He laps up every last drop as she rides it out, overstimulating her slightly, and he can tell. He pulls back with a grin, proud of himself and enjoying the way she looks so fucked out like this. 

He kisses back up her tummy, between her boobs and then hovers over her while she’s still catching her breath, “hi…” 

She smiles, “Hi?” 

“Ready for me to show you the rest?” 

“There’s more?” She teases, “You love me more than that?”

He laughs, “Yeah, that was just a taste…” 

She pulls him in for a kiss, tasting herself on his lips. “Mm, a good taste.” 

“You’re telling me,” he growls. “I could do that every day for the rest of my life.” 

“And I’d let you…” 

He kisses her again, cause if he doesn’t, she won’t stop teasing him. 

Kissing him while coming down from her high, feels unreal. She’s floating on a cloud, and might as well be on drugs— it feels too good, she moans against him, legs wrapped around him, she never wants to let him go. He kisses the side of her mouth, “baby—

She hums, pulling him back in for another kiss. 

He pulls back, “I can’t fuck you with my boxers still on.” 

She sighs, pretending it’s more work than it is, “Fine, take ‘em off.” 

He shakes his head with a smile as she lets him go and he’s able to push his boxers off. “And I need to grab a condom—

“did you bring condoms?” She sounds shocked. 

He nods, “yeah… I didn’t expect anything, I just always have some in my toiletries bag.” 

She watches his cute ass jiggle as he walks towards his bag, he squats to undo the zipper and she tries not to laugh at the view of his balls dangling but it’s so endearing somehow? He’s real and there and he’s about to rock her world. 

He’s quick to grab what he wants, he rips the condom open with his teeth and tosses the wrapper to the floor as he rolls it on right beside the bed. She watches carefully, eyes scanning his whole body. She hasn’t really had a good look at him while naked yet, he’s been pressed against the bed or on top of her. But damn. 

“Jesus,” she whispers under her breath. 

He smirks, “what?” 

She waves her hand around in his general direction, “You just walk around with all that under your suits every day?” 

He shakes his head again, “I could say the same thing about you.” 

He crawls back onto the bed, between her legs again, one hand on the bed as he hovers over her, “you okay with this position?” 

She nods, “perfectly okay with it. It’s a very underrated position.” 

“Mhm,” he agrees, leaning in to kiss her again. One hand on her hip, he grinds himself against her, “Ready?” 

She nodded, watching as he lets go of her hip to grip himself at the base, she spreads her legs a bit more and he taps her clit once just for fun but it makes her whine, “Don’t tease me.” 

“But you can tease me?” He asks, head right at her entrance, about to push in… she nods and that’s when he does it. Watching her head tip back with a silent moan. “Now I know how to get you quiet.” 

He goes back to rest his hand on her hip but she reaches for them and interlocks their fingers, instead. He bottomed out and dropped to hover over her once more, bringing their interlocked hands over her head. 

She reached up to kiss him, but Aaron pushed into the kiss and made her settle into the pillow once again. It honestly felt like a movie scene, the first time between two star-crossed lovers. He pulled out ever so slightly before thrusting in again, she gasped against his mouth. Aaron trusted more while she pushed her hips into it as well, an offbeat rhythm developed in pure ecstasy. She let go of Aaron’s hands to snake them around his waist, to run her fingers over the soft and slightly chilled skin of his back. Feeling the bump of his spine Aaron ducked into the crook of her neck, placing kisses along her collarbone.

He changed the position of his thrust as he wrapped his arms under her, arching her back ever so slightly to reach the bundle of nerves that left her a quivering mess. She, in response to the added pleasure, ran her sharp nails down Aaron’s back and he groaned at the feeling, “do that again.” he requested.

“Like that?” She asked, dragging his nails down him once more.

“Yeah,” Aaron moaned, dark and deep. “Mark me… where no one can see it, only you know tomorrow.”

So she does, she runs her nails over his back with more intent, knowing there will be 8 red lines spread down his back in the morning. Just then, he starts to kiss lower, down to her boobs, where he sucks a mark that shouldn't be visible in her dress tomorrow… he wanted to mark her just as bad. But his kisses quickly return to her neck and lower ear. 

“Aaron,” she moans out. “Go a little faster?” 

He does as she asks, keeping that loving feeling but picking up the pace. The feeling of pure bliss overtook her body with each thrust, warm chills ran through him with each brush of his thumb on her clit. Every kiss to her neck and squeeze around her waist made her feel like she was on fire. The hairs on her arms stood up, and goosebumps formed along his forearms. Aaron kissed from her neck to her nipple and took the hard nib into his mouth causing her to moan like she never had before.

“Aaron,” she panted, pulling Aaron’s face back up to his.

His eyes were absolutely blown out in pleasure, those chocolate wonders he used to stare into were now replaced solely by the pupils. She ran her thumb across Aaron’s cheek before reaching to the nape of his neck to pull him into another kiss. Open mouths pressed together, hot air on each other’s faces as they panted to the pleasure.

She was in heaven.

Her orgasm bubbled in her stomach, “are you close?” Aaron whispered right beside her mouth, kissing her cheek lightly after.

She hummed, unable to speak with the mass amount of pleasure coursing through her body. Aaron fucked into her a bit harder, a tiny bit faster, hitting her G-spot dead on each time to the point the nerves in her thighs were quaking uncontrollably.

She was so close, Aaron used 3 fingers to quickly rub over her clit before she threw her head back with a shout. Cumming with her eyes pressed shut, pleasure coursed through her body stronger than she’s ever felt before.

Nothing had ever made her cum that hard, ripping through her like her soul was leaving her body. She dug her nails deep into Aaron’s skin holding him close to his body while he kept thrusting.

A high-pitched gasp left his lips, close to her ear as his hips sputtered into hers one last time. She still hadn’t opened her eyes, her breath rigid, she felt winded. Aaron had stilled as he came inside of her and then collapsed into her, deadweight lying on her.

But she didn’t mind. Not in the slightest. She wrapped herself around him even tighter and kissed the side of his head, “I love you, too.” 

He kisses her neck, “I can’t believe I was afraid to tell you…” 

“Silly man, we could’ve been doing that the whole time,” she teases him again the first chance she gets. 

He huffs a little laugh out of his nose, smiling against her. “We can do this all the time now.” 

“Mhm,” she squeezes him a little tighter. “I hope you know this means we’re dating now. I don’t just fuck anyone. Especially not my boss…” 

He manages to push himself up to look at her, and the look on his face says it all. “Yeah, I know… and I’ll handle the paperwork when we get back.” 

—

They get all dolled up together, between kisses and flirting and teasing… they end up fully dressed, presents in hand, on their way to the party. They hold hands the whole cab ride over, up the elevator and into the booming restaurant. 

It’s entirely booked out for her sister’s party, on the top floor of a fancy building. It’s completely catered, there are fancy waiters walking around with trays of hors d’oeuvres and expensive champagne. They have their gifts taken from their hands upon arrival and their hands are instantly filled with a drink. She looks around, looking for the first person she knows well and spots her mom and dad over on the other side of the room. 

“Come with me, I have some people I want you to meet…” she says as she leads him through the crowd. 

He’s nervous but more excited. She gets to show him off and this isn’t a lie. He really is her boyfriend and they are in love and happy and this is everything he’s ever wanted. With his hand around her waist the whole time, shoulder to shoulder, he meets her parents and her sister. He shakes hands with her dad and her new brother-in-law, he gets hugs from the mom and sister, they’re looking at her with eyes that he can hear. They’re saying how much of an improvement he is to the last guy, they’re amazed at how handsome he is, and he blushes slightly in response. 

“So how long has this been going on?” Her dad asks. 

She looks up at him and smiles, “Not long, but we’re really happy.” 

“The happiest,” he agrees, stealing a quick kiss from her that makes the women swoon. 

“You know, this is fantastic,” her sister announces. “I was worried you’d be upset to see Brad and Cameron here together but now you have Aaron and they’re not even coming anymore. Something happened… I don’t even think they’re together anymore.” 

“Oh?” She’s completely shocked to hear that. 

“Once a cheater always a cheater,” her brother-in-law says under his breath with the roll of his eyes. 

“We see it all the time at work,” Aaron agrees. “It’s pathological. They crave attention so intensely that they’ll do anything to get it, to the detriment of the people they love. They cheat because for a moment they’re the most important person, they’re attractive enough to get who they want and powerful enough to get away with it. And even when it blows up in their face they can play the ‘you wouldn’t be this mad if you weren’t so obsessed with me’ card.” 

“That’s Brad,” her dad agrees. “Good riddance, honestly.” 

“Let’s just leave it there,” her mom announces. “We’re here for Lindsay and Connor.” 

“It’s been lovely to meet you Aaron, but we have a lot of people to mingle with,” Lindsay announces and Connor sighs. “We’ll talk again later?” 

“Sounds good,” Y/N lets them head off and then she’s just with her parents. “Um, I’m hungry… Aaron, did you want to go raid the snacks?” 

“I’d love to,” he agrees. “It was lovely to meet you both.” 

“We hope to see you again regularly?” Her mother throws in. 

“I don’t plan on going anywhere,” he assures, “you should get used to me.” 

She manages to pull him away from them, a little overwhelmed and so in love with him. She gets him to an empty corner and looks up at him like he’s crazy, “did you seriously say that?” 

He nods, “What part of last night didn’t you understand? I’m madly in love with you. I would marry you tomorrow if it wouldn’t take the attention off your sister.” 

She just laughs, shocked and amazed that he just said that. “Really?” 

“Yes. Really.” 

She shakes her head in disbelief, “o-okay… but you still have to ask me. I don’t need anything big and extravagant and I’d like to maybe pick the ring out with you if you want but—

“You want to?” 

She nods, that teasing smirk he loves so much plastered on her face, “I don’t just want to be your work wife, Aaron.” 

“We’ll revisit this in the new year… I need Jack to know about this and be okay with it before I spring a step-mom on him,” he explains. 

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

General Taglist 

@ncsls0515 @stevesmunsons @reidsbookclub @sweetyyhippyy @manuosorioh @mrs-dr-reid @k-k0129 @squishyturtle @katsukis1wife @buckleyhans @mrs-ssa-hotch @ssavanessa22

[your-girl-nina]

Hear me out-

The marauders never knew just how batshit crazy the skittles were. They had only heard some rumors but never truly saw their antics, I mean sure they had heard that one of them had set the lab on fire, or the other slept with half the school, or even that they poisoned slug horn. Yet never the fights, the weed, the insane things that thy consider normal. Especially Sirius, he expected his goody two shoes brother's friends to be pretentious assholes.

Cut to when jegulus started dating, the two friend groups started to interact, and that's when they saw how crazy they were. It started as everyone was sitting in the Slytherin common room, then out of nowhere barges on barty and Pandora cackling while running away from something, that's when Evan who was standing closest to the door quickly shut it with a shit eating grin. Regulus let out an exasperated sigh and then Dorcas with a subtle smirk "what'd you two do this time?" And with the most terrifying grin Pandora, sweet, sweet Pandora said in the most soft voice "we jinxed Snape then we lit the classroom on fire" Regulus then just smiled and said "awww thank guys you didn't have to" in the most sarcastic tone despite his smile.

Yeah, that was another thing about the skittles, they were OVERprotective, those guys would kill for each other if the occasion arise. The marauders saw a lot of their antics, from laughing as thy jinx or curse someone, to smoking weed in the perfect's room and playing tag (ON THE EDGE OF THE ASTRONOMY TOWER) but what tops the disastrous cake is when they saw just to which extent their cruelty reaches.

It started with a commotion in the halls, Remus was the first to arrive, then Sirius, and oh was he shocked. He saw his little cousin, HIS LITTLE COUSIN narcissa being hugged by Pandora, while barty absolutely beats the living shit out of Mulciber and Lucius. He looked manic, nose and lip bleeding, but he had this crazed look in his eyes, and a grin of pure evil. All while Evan is smirking at him and Regulus and Dorcas apply healing charms on Mulciber and Lucius so they wouldn't pass out. They were all laughing, Regulus. Was. Laughing. Maniacally. Then narcissa comes up to Regulus and whispers something in his ear. "That's enough barty" he then says. Barty, the fucking maniac seems reluctant to back off until Evan quite literally pulls him off and throws him over his shoulder. Regulus walks menacingly towards the two assholes on the floor, "I'll say this once and once only, you talk like that about my cousin or touch her without her consent one more time and we'll cut you tiny dicks off to shove them so far down your throats till they come out your ass with your shitty personality, got it? " they just nod while the deemed "skittles" saunder off.

Sirius wanted to rip his hair out, james was beyond turned on, Peter looked traumatized while lily was chuckling and Remus looked amused.

Another incident was when both groups were sitting together and a Raven claw came up to then. He was eyeing lily and Dorcas weirdly. "Hey ladies, how about you and I leave those losers alone and have some fun? " they looked beyond uncomfortable, "no thanks mate we're not into that." The guy frowned "I promise you won't regret it, I've got a way with girls". " look pal, they said they weren't interested " snarled barty. "Says the person who slept with half the school, shut up whor-" before he even finishes, he was on the floor, a livid Evan looming over him. "Fucking scum, let's leave"

It took about a week and a half of James and Regulus dating before the marauders realized how fucking batshit crazy they were.

[that-basic-simp]

Water Lily

Mizu X Fem!Reader CW: Uses the scientific term for a man's groin WC: 2.4k+ Uses he/him pronouns at the beginning and then changes to she/her Also POV change at the end

"Mizu?"

"Yes, Mizu."

"Like water."

He nodded his head.

"Interesting name for a man," I said, eyeing him up and down.

He was tall and slender. Raven like hair that was tied into a bun, a Kasa on his head that hid his face if he tilted it down. There were round tinted glasses on his face. Wonder why they were tinted? Was he hiding something that he shouldn't? Such as his eye color. Taking a closer look, even if they were tinted, I could see the shape of his eyes. They were round, not almond. His face was pretty angular, which there were some men here with angular faces, but not like his. He was a peculiar man, I will say that.

"Please, I-I understand if you don't want to take me in, but I need to find shelter for the night. A-And I thought this place was abandoned."

"It wasn't, at one point," I said.

"Did you have a family?"

"Yes. A big one at that."

Looking at the surroundings, Mizu nodded his head, "I can tell by the size of it."

"But we weren't rich enough to live in the big cities like Kyoto."

"So why settle out here? In the middle of no where?"

"It was quiet and there weren't many visitors. Except you."

"I-I don't mean to rush this, but," he shifted and that was when I saw it.

There was blood dripping from his side. Rushing him inside, I closed the door and sat him down.

"Take your shirt off," I said.

"I can handle it myself, thanks," he said.

"Please, you're in need of stitches and you're in no condition of doing it yourself."

"How do you know?"

"Were you the same one to do the patchwork in your shirt?"

Eyeing the white stitches that were haphazardly done, Mizu pouted and sighed.

"Fine. B-But promise you won't tell anyone?"

"Tell anyone who? That I saw a man shirtless? I had male cousins who would swim naked in the river behind the house. I've seen more penises than I'd like to," I sighed.

"I take it you're not fond of it?"

"Never was and never will be."

"Why are you out here all alone?" Mizu asked as I got the needle and thread ready, along with some alcohol.

"My family left me."

"Why?"

"The same reason as to why I never want to sleep with a man, let alone be touched by one."

"B-But why are you helping me?"

"You seem like a nice guy," I said.

"So you don't like men?"

"Not romantically."

"I see," Mizu said. "Well, you're in luck."

"Why's that?"

As soon as Mizu removed his cloak and shirt, I understood why. There was a binding around his chest.

"A woman."

Mizu nodded her head, "Yes."

"Well, do you want me to call you sir or madam?"

"Mizu."

"Mizu? Just Mizu?"

"Yes. Just Mizu."

"Well, if there was one thing that stuck from my family, is I always gave people nicknames. No matter if they were staying for the day or a week."

"Why?"

"Hospitable," I said and got the needle and thread ready, stitching up the stab wound in Mizu's left abdomen.

"Geez, you have a lot of scars over your body. What kind of a samurai doesn't wear armor?"

"I-I'm not a samurai. I have no honor. Unless you count revenge honorable."

"Why the revenge?"

There was a long pause.

"I know it's easier said than done, but you can trust me. Not like I have anyone to tell your secrets to. I do live alone."

"Surprised you haven't gone insane," Mizu said.

"You and me both."

"Do you remember when the four white men came to Japan?"

"My parents told me about it. Caused a big stir."

"I was the product of one of them. He slept with my mother and she had me."

"C-Can I look at something?"

"What?" Mizu turned towards me.

Reaching up, she flinched away, causing me to retract my hand. Slowly nodding, she leaned towards me. Removing her glasses, I finally found what was hiding underneath. Bright, blue eyes that seemed to shine in the firelight. They reminded me of the river outside, how it shimmered and shined against the morning and evening sun.

"Your eyes," I began.

"Just say it," Mizu said with annoyance.

"Say what?"

"That I'm a demon, an onryo. A dog."

"They're beautiful."

"What?"

"Your eyes, they're beautiful. I haven't seen anything like them."

"O-Oh," Mizu said. "T-Thanks, I guess."

I smiled, "So cold. Yet the minute you're exposed to a burning fire, you freeze up."

"I haven't really been complimented throughout my years of being alive. I was seen as a demon. A monster. That I had no right to be alive."

"But you are, aren't you?"

"Alive only to do one thing and that is kill those white men."

"What do you plan to do afterwards?"

"I don't know."

"Well, you always have a place here, Mizu," I said, taping some gauze around the stitches. I put the binding on her chest and she pulled the shirt up.

"Stay as long as you need to," I said, throwing the needle away.

"You never told me your name," Mizu said.

"Y/N."

"Y/N," she said. "Thank you, Y/N."

"Rest, Mizu. I will fix you up something to eat to help with the healing process.

"How can I repay you?"

"By coming back alive."

"Back where?"

"Here. I like your company."

Even if I couldn't see her, there was a smile across her face. Once I had finished making her something to eat, I sat down beside her and handed her the bowl.

"So, your family," Mizu said.

"Minute they found me with a woman they picked up their things and left."

"Nice of them to leave you a house to yourself instead of throwing you out."

"They went with my aunt and uncle. They're lords so of course they'd want to live in a bigger place than this."

"Of course. The greedy just become greedier."

"But I have found solace within these walls. I thank you for the company," I smiled.

"Thank you for helping me."

I nodded, standing up, letting Mizu have some space and time to eat.

"You're handy with a sword," I said, watching her practice.

It's been a few days since Mizu arrived at my doorstep asking for help, even though she really didn't want it at first. I was sure she would have left by now because of how she spoke of her mission. She was serious and she wanted these people to pay. I felt her pain, her vengeance. But it was killing her on the inside.

"I am handy with other things," Mizu said, wiping some sweat from her face. "Anything is a weapon if you really think about it."

"In your hands, even chopsticks can be a weapon."

She chuckled, "Yeah. I guess they can be."

"Who taught you?"

"Myself."

"Oh, self taught."

"No school would take me. Y-You've seen me. I-I'm a disgrace."

Walking over to Mizu, I raised my hand and placed it against her cheek. Moving her head back a bit, I found her blue eyes.

"Mizu, you're not."

"W-Why do this to me?"

"Do what?"

"Tell me something I am not when I am."

"It were those who claimed you as something you're not. They were telling you you're an onyro, a demon, a dog, whatever they wanted to call you. That is something you're not, Mizu. You're simply a person who is just trying to get by in this world."

"I-I," she reached up and grabbed my hand, nuzzling into my palm. "I-I never really thought about it that way."

"Because you were taught not to show who you really were. Not to be you, Mizu. You had to put a mask on your face and because of it, you hid away and that's really the only thing you know."

Tears streamed down her face as she squeezed her eyes shut tightly. Removing my hand, she let go of it.

"Leave me."

"Mizu, d-did I say something wrong?"

"Just leave," she snarled at me. "And quit pretending you know me."

She walked off and continued to train. That was interesting, but it made her all the more complex.

"I see you're still not gone," I said, sitting down and putting a bowl in front of her.

"And you still haven't given me a nickname," Mizu said, raising the bowl to her lips.

"I haven't thought of a good one."

"Well, my name means water. Shouldn't that mean something?"

"It does, I am trying to find a way to tie that in. But nothing is coming."

"Just call me ocean because I come and go like it."

"Then it would be rain."

"What was your nickname? If your parents gave you one."

"They gave me the nickname of koi."

"Koi? Like a koi fish?"

"Yep. I loved swimming, just like the koi fish. And I had perseverance, especially when it came to learning medicinal soups and what was edible and what wasn't."

"And here I thought you'd poison me," Mizu joked.

"Ha-ha," I said dryly.

"You're actually quite good at it," she said.

"Good at what?"

"Taking care of people. And well, everything you've done for me lately."

"Oh. T-Thank you."

"Didn't think I'd compliment you?"

"N-No, but I just don't see you complimenting someone."

"Really? Why's that?"

"Cold like ice."

"Oh," she sighed.

"But once warm, the ice melts away, leaving water in its place. You're resilient, Mizu. Like water itself."

"A-About the other day," Mizu said.

"Yeah?"

"I-I'm sorry. I-I shouldn't have said that to you."

"Well, for someone to say those kinds of things, someone had to be in similar shoes. I was in similar shoes like you. Having to hide who I truly was and then when it came out, I was scolded for it. Seen as a monster. Seen as something anything other than human."

"It must have been hard, having your entire family turn their backs on you when you needed them most."

"It was," I said, picking up my chopsticks and grabbing the noodles. "But like my nickname, I pushed through. I found a way to overcome it and was able to thrive. Now, I find myself in a better place than before. And while I thought it couldn't get any better, you came along."

Mizu picked up her head, "W-What did I do?"

"Gave me another reason to stay here."

"You wanted to leave?"

"I did. I took some jobs from the nearby town and saved up enough money to move into said town. People tried to offer me their homes, but I wanted to earn a house by myself and work there."

"Why haven't you yet?"

"Well, someone by the name of Mizu came to my door the day I was getting ready to pack my things."

Mizu turned away, avoiding my gaze.

"M-My apologies. I-I should have left earlier."

"I enjoy your company, Mizu. I'm glad you stayed for as long as you did. And besides, I think you're all healed up. So you also needed to stay to heal."

"Do you have everything?" I asked Mizu as I straightened out the cloak on her shoulders.

"Yes, I have everything," she said.

I handed her her tinted glasses and she held off putting them on yet. I also handed her a different kind of scarf.

"What's this for?" she asked, taking it.

"A more fashionable scarf to wrap around your neck."

"Why?"

"I don't think you like having whatever you have around your neck. Besides, it'll also keep you warm."

Mizu removed what was around her neck and replaced it with what I had given her.

"I-It is warm," she said, her eyes widening with surprise. "W-What is it?"

"Part of a blanket I had when I was a kid."

"W-Why do something like that?"

"It'll provide you warmth and comfort. And it'll remind you of me."

"I can't thank you enough, Y/N," Mizu said.

"You don't need to. J-Just promise me one thing."

"I-I'll try to."

I reached over and grabbed her hands, holding them gently in mine.

"Promise me you'll come back alive. I don't care if it's in pieces to where I have to stitch you up again," I poked at her abdomen, earning a chuckle from her. Reaching up, I placed my hand against her cheek, caressing the skin. "Just please come back to me."

"I-I'll try to, Y/N."

"Thank you."

"I-I think I might have found a way to thank you."

"How's that?"

Leaning towards me, she placed her lips lightly to the corner of my mouth, pressing a quick kiss. Pulling away, her cheeks flushed. Smiling, I leaned towards her and pressed a light and quick kiss to her lips. When I pulled away, her eyes were wide and her mouth open slightly. Her cheeks went from pink to a deep shade of red. I giggled, seeing her flustered like that. She put her glasses on and tipped her Kasa down over her eyes.

"G-Goodbye, Y/N."

She walked down the path of my house and turned to the left, heading to the nearest city.

"Goodbye, my water lily."

~Mizu's POV~

Walking down the familiar path, I reached up and grabbed onto the scarf, feeling the silk material. A smile crawled over my face when I finally reached the turn that led to her house. Turning, my heart sank into my stomach and my knees got heavy. Rushing towards the house, the once vibrant paint was weathered away and there were boards where the windows used to be. Ivy was growing and grass was overtaking the stone path.

"Y-Y/N!" I called, rushing towards the backside of the house. "Y-Y/N!"

I ran towards the front and let out a silent cry as tears slid down my face.

"N-No. I-I haven't been gone for that long."

Walking close to the door, there was a board covering it so I couldn't even really open it. Stepping closer, there was a little piece of paper sticking out from underneath one of the boards. Grabbing it, I pulled out a letter with my name on it. Opening it with trembling hands, I read the first two words and was immediately running towards that town. I should have known. She mentioned she wanted to move there. I didn't think she'd move that quickly. As I was running there, I was reading the note. Reaching the town, I walked through some crowds of people and before I knew it, I was standing in front of her house. Her new house. There was a bell hanging by the door. Raising my hand, I grabbed the red sting at the end and rang it, a jingle erupting into the air.

"Coming!" her voice called from the inside.

Taking in a deep breath, I let it out and the door opened up.

"M-Mizu?"

"I-I'm b--"

Her arms were thrown around me and she was hugging me tightly.

"I thought you were dead."

Lifting my arms, I wrapped them around her, hugging her tightly.

"I missed you, too."

Pulling away, she cupped my face in her hands. Pulling me towards her, our lips met lightly and I let out a small hum. Oh to be with her after a long time of fighting. Pulling away, she smiled at me.

"My water lily," she breathed out.

Reaching up, I grabbed her hand.

"I don't think koi suits you."

"Oh? Then what should you call me?"

"Mine," I said huskily.

Her eyes blinked a few times and her face turned a bright shade of red. Smirking, I pushed her into the house and closed the door.

"Payback for when I left."

She chuckled, tears forming in her eyes as I reached up and removed my glasses.

"I missed those eyes. I missed you, Mizu."

"I missed you, too, Y/N."

[0xstarzx0]

LONG TIME

Rafe x Virgin readers

synopsis: When you develop strong feelings for Rafe and he rejects you decide to take you in hand but the Cameron is not of the same opinion

[English is not my native language.❗️❗️]

tw: smut, jealousy, insult, fingering, sex . ______________________________________

You cried, you knew that love was unreciprocal. Yet you had hoped so hard that you were wrong.

You’ve known Rafe since you were little, you grew up with him and despite that, you’re two totally opposite people.

Rafe was the type to be open to others, he flirted, slept with girls and you were his opposite.

You only talked to Rafe, Topper and Kelce. You didn’t hit on each other, and when someone did, you didn’t know how to react.

Rafe told you his experiences and you were a little jealous of them girls.

You loved him since you were in elementary school, you weren’t good at expressing your actuons properly with him, but everyone suspected you were in love with him. And of course it was always him who denied.

When one night he came to your house, you let him in. Rafe settled in your bed and you joined him.

you put your head on his chest and said nothing, he started playing with your hair. He always did it when he was upset or sad.

"Why is he like that with me?" to ask, his voice was no louder than a whisper but, you could hear his sadness through her. you looked up and met his eyes, you couldn’t decipher how he felt. You looked down. I don’t know, Rafey, but he’s your dad, he’d do anything for you... You know that?".

Rafe heaves a heavy sigh and without warning you, he grabs your arms and draws your head to his. you get carried away and don’t move, you like to feel serenity with him. "I love you Rafe." you say calmly. I love you too Y/N" he answers.

"No, I really love you, Rafe."

Rafe’s breath is taking a few seconds before you realize what you just said.

You get up from Rafe and don’t dare look at him. You promised yourself never to tell him for fear of breaking your friendship. You just ruined everything.

"What did you just say?" Rafe asks you, you clear your throat and start playing with your hands. 

"I love you, Rafe… more than just a friend…" You hear his swear before he getting up.

He starts pacing in your room, putting his hand in his hair. "You can’t do that to me, you know, I hope?"

"I didn’t choose that Rafe…" "Fuck Y/N you’re the last person I want to go out with!" your ego takes a hit. You knew he didn’t like you, but not that much.

You say nothing and lower your head, you feel the tears pouring down your cheeks. You hear the door slammed severely and when you raise your head, there is no one.

You burst into tears like a child, it was your first sorrow of love and in addition it was bad.

you got up to take all the things that remind you of its existence and you all threw away, photo, clothes everything.

but you felt even worse when you saw a picture of yourself and him in a photo booth, you remember you were on his lap because of the small space, you kissed his cheek for one of the photos and he ran his head in his neck for another.

You felt bad and guilty.

______________________________________________

The days that followed you avoided the boys, too embarrassed. You knew Rafe must have told them about, your altercation with him.

And you weren’t happy when you saw your cousin Ariana in your room on a Sunday morning with more than ten suitcases.

She was beautiful, much more than you and that, you don’t know if you could bear it.

You decided to spend your vacation in your bed feeling down but with Ariana around, and her melanin raising her tan had to be flawless.

It wasn’t a problem until she decided your huge garden wasn’t well placed to sunbathe, so she took you back to the beach for your greatest misfortune.

You who never liked to show your body you had come straight to hell.

Doing all of his things that you weren’t used to did only annoy you even more.

______

You were reading your novel when she came into your room excited, you asked Sarah to take care of her if she just had a day that couldn’t take it anymore.

She throws a bag at you from a shop you didn’t know. You raise an eyebrow and she explains:

"We’re going out tonight to take a shower and put on what I bought you, I’ll fuck you and smooth your hair by what you look like Mrs Crumble in Daybreak."

 she raising her top to expose her chest smaller than yours, you would love to have hers, you no longer tell the story of how many times Rafe fought what weird guys looked at your breast for too long.

"I don’t want to" you say when you put the bag on the floor." I don’t give a shit you get up, if I get attacked it’ll be because you’re not there, you got thirty minutes." She’s going to your bathroom, so you have to use the shared bathroom.

______________________________________________

"Stop fidgeting," Ariana says, "I let you straighten my hair, put on my makeup, and now you make me wear a dress like this?" what?" said she offended." I chose it for you!"

The dress that Ariana had chosen for you was white, it was transparent at the level of your breasts and had a small slit on the side, it was not even halfway to your thighs it was short and the hips that you did not really help. So yes, you didn’t like that dress.

Ariana gently grabs your hand and you look at her "I swear to God, if anyone makes a comment about your body or your dress I’ll kill it, okay?"

She gave you a sincere smile and you just smiled back.

______________________________________________

You had arrived with Ariana at the party, you didn’t know where she was until you realized it was at Topper’s! your heart thought it exploded when you walked through the door.

Ariana wanted to drink, so when she started wanting to take you to drinks you refused, why? by the fact that the landmark of the three kooks was near the drinking table, it is there that we find the most beautiful girls.

You were waiting on your phone in a corner of the house for Ariana to come back when someone shoved you, you do not raise your head to make you small but the person recognized you. Y/N it’s you? damn it!" you raise your head and see Kelce.

"Hey, Kelce, it’s been a long time." You say embarrass. "A little while ago!" He laughs and puts his arm on your shoulders, you try to get rid of his grip without him realizing it but without result.

"Guys guess who I found!" he said cheerfully drawing attention to you.

You turn the rete and look one by one at the people sitting, your eyes meet those of Rafe but it quickly breaks the contact to detail you, it blocks on your breasts little veiled. You barely have the temos to readjust your glasses as Topper jumps at you.

He squeezes you so hard that if he continues he will crush you "We ghoster it was not cool," he said while letting you go. You apologize and notice a new figure arrived

a girl a little taller than you with short hair and a beautiful chest with beautiful hips, quite the opposite of you.

She says hello to no one and goes to sit on the rafe legs, he approaches his head from his ear and whispers something to her. She laughs and kisses him. Your belly turns and you feel your heart being destroyed little by little.

"Y/N I’ve been looking for you for ten minutes, if you don’t move your ass, I swear you’re sleeping on the floor tonight!" said Ariana, joining you.

You wave at everyone and Ariana walks beside you, you take her red cup and the wood in dry ass, she looks at you shocked. "Tonight we better have fun" you demand from Ariana.

She smiles at you and takes you to the dance floor.

______________________________________________

It must be at least three hours since you got here, you stopped counting how many drinks you drank from the fifth, you’re still dancing alone this time by what Ariana, found a fool by the pool leaving you alone.

you make sensual movements alone when hands land on your hips you do not remove them and continue to stick tight with a stranger.

Suddenly he grabs your hand and tries to drag you, you follow him until you realize he’s trying to take you upstairs, where all the rooms are. You struggle but nothing does it is much stronger than you.

You tell him you don’t want to but he always holds your hands firmly until your is called away, the person calling you uses a firm tone and you turn your head to come face to face with Rafe.

The guy stops and Rafe raises an eyebrow, you barely stand up and your glasses are badly put on, your right breasts and has two fingers out of your cleavage and your glasses are badly put on.  Rafe has to admit it if he could, he’ll fuck you doggy-style in front of everyone to show who you belong to.

Rafe casts an evil glance at the stranger who peews the escape as fast as he can, leaving you in front of Rafe playing with your hands.

You smile at the frog you just made with your hands.

You raise your head and Rafe has her eyes on you, his eyes filled with lust compared to yours which are as innocent as a doe. you put your hands in front of his face "look I made a frog" you smile and he grabs your hand and takes you upstairs.

you do not dispute and follow him like a nice girl, he opens a room to the nose and once inside, he attacks your lips by kissing them aggresively, Rafe hungry, hungry for you. And when your body accidentally sticks to yours. Rafe wants to fuck you.

He pushes you on the bed, you fall on your back, he takes off his teeshirt." If you don’t stop staring at me with his eyes I swear I’ll make you come so much that everyone will hear you scream my name, darling."

You accidentally bite your lower lip, grab on the bed and start to approach you, you step back and your back finds the head of the bed. Rafe laughs before catching your thighs firmly. He gets in between and starts lifting ra dress, his cock becomes painful when he sees your purple panties

He starts kissing your belly and then comes down slowly, he kisses your thighs and gets closer and closer to your pussy you moan so hard while he hasn’t even started.

he starts kissing your pussy through your panties, he can swear he can feel you dripping. "Rafe.." You moan " Yes ma'am?" "Please, touch me." You managed to ask. Rafe takes off your panties and his tongue starts sucking your clitoris, you moan so hard just for that, if rafe gives you his cock you’ll scream?

Rafe passes his tongue between your soaked folds, your taste on his tongue, he will become addicted! he sucks your clitoris when he pushes a finger inside you. You scream his name, so if he starts to move his fingers in you, he remembers you’re a virgin.

His dick wants you, you want it too you just don’t say it. You feel your orgasm coming when rafe withdraws, you frown and he starts to take off his shorts and then, his shorts. You look with amazement at his huge cock, he took it in hand and jerked it off

"It’s never going to come home, Rafe!" you say with fear. "It’s going to come home trust me." He starts rubbing it against your folds and sinks his pin inside you, you moan. Your moan gives him the strength to push violently inside you. You scream and your hands cling to the sheets. He starts slowly he leans over you and you drop the sheets and grab his biceps. "You’re so fucking tight!" He’s groaning in your ear, his kidney squeals other times quiet and slow is accelerating, he’s getting more violent and you’re screaming in pain. Rafe please stop! you’re hurting me!" You yell Rafe continues her violent push " wrap your legs around my waist, it will hurt less! "

you listen to his advice and the pain subsides but he continues to plow you, he insults you with all the names "You take so well my dick bitch!" if I take myself away from you is what you will put me under for my dick like the bitch you are!"

you stick your head in his neck, his push is hard to take and when he hits you 85% and in your G-spot. Your orgasm comes and you scream are name- It’s not like you did it all the time or he destroyed you- He doesn’t stop his thrusts are orgasm is not far last you but the tears rise you, he is too hard and his hard to bear.

when he finally ejaculates in you , he screams your name. he takes off from you and your pussy feels alone, comle if it had just lost life . Rafe grabs his phone and positions it above you, you ask him what he is doing and he simply answers you: "You are the most beautiful thing I have seen at the moment does not ruin everything. he said while kissing you.

______________________________________________

the next morning you wake up in the same room as the day before, this time alone. You take your things and start walking out of the room as calmly as possible so you don’t wake up. "Y/N you don’t have breakfast with us?" You jump and turn the rete to notice Rafe, Kelce and Topper were watching you. Kelce and Topper show a smirk.

"Should I go home sorry guys next time maybe?" Rafe gets up and walks up to you he bends over and captures your lips in a quick kiss "I’ll get dressed and walk you home" he begins to climb the stairs leaving you with the two acolytes.

"Since the time of course you can tell us how it was? " said kelce bringing you the seat next to him. you limp and sit next to them "He didn’t go there with soft hands says Topper"

______________________________________________ .

.

.

.

[pennylanefics]

Skate Day Gone Wrong - Matthew Tkachuk

a/n: this was a cute little idea i had a while ago when i first started getting hockey content on tiktok :) it took me longer than i expected with everything going on, but i think it turned out cute!

warnings: mentions of hospitals, beginning of a panic attack (briefly mentioned, not too descriptive)

summary: matt begs you to go skating with him but it takes a turn for the worst when you end up falling down on the ice

word count: ~4.6k

“Come on, it’ll be so much fun!” Matthew begs you, grabbing your hands and squeezing them gently. A sigh passes your lips and your eyes fall to your entwined hands, a small grin stretching on your face as you realize he’s been rubbing his thumb back and forth against the back of your hand.

“You know I’m not as graceful, baby. It’ll be a disaster.” He pulls the puppy-dog eyes as soon as you finish your sentence. But it wasn’t going to get by you this time.

Matt was trying to get you to go skating with him at the local ice rink. He wanted, and he deserved, a break from hockey, but he couldn’t stay away from the ice and exercise in some capacity. But since the start of your relationship, you were very clear with him that you were like a newborn deer in ice skates.

“It’ll be a nice little date! I’ll hold onto you the entire time, you never have to let go of my hand, I won’t let you fall, I promise. You have my word,” he holds out his pinky to seal his words. You sigh once more, finally looking up into bright blue eyes, filled with hope and excitement. That alone was enough for you to change your mind.

“Okay,” you finally agree, and within a second, Matt celebrates by tackling you in a hug, your laughter mixing together to fill the otherwise silent bedroom of his.

“Yay!! This is going to be so much fun, I have been wanting to get you on the ice with me for the longest time,” he admits, pressing kisses all over your face, eliciting more giggles from you. 

“I know you have, but I went once when I was younger and couldn’t find my balance, I ended up falling pretty hard. My cousins made fun of me for it and everything, so it’s something I avoided.” Matt coos softly and tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear so tenderly.

“Well, I won’t do that, and like I said, I won’t even let you fall. Not gonna happen on my watch, darling.” He kisses you a couple times, his hand remaining on your cheek, sending warmth through your body. 

“I fucking hope. Otherwise you’ll be taking care of me the entire time.” He chuckles quietly and crawls into bed with you, wraping his arms around you instantly, and you instinctively curl into his soft, warm chest.

“Not sure how I’ll be able to with the upcoming road trip we have,” he replies.

“Then you better keep that promise of yours, Chucky.”

The following day, Matthew was up bright and early, preparing breakfast for the both of you and getting everything he needed ready to head to the rink. He planned on just taking his skates and wearing a simple pair of jeans and a black sweatshirt, no gear or anything was needed, really; he wasn’t needing to do any drills or practice anything anyways.

“Morning, sweetheart,” he greets you with a kiss on your forehead and then your cheek. Groaning, you shield your eyes from the blinding sun slicing through the curtains. Matt always loved this time of day, being a morning person, he was able to admire your beauty as you slept, like an angel in his eyes, glowing in the golden, natural light.

“Too early,” you grumble, causing him to laugh softly. To add to the dramatics, you grab the comforter and pull it up over your head, not wanting to leave the comfort and warmth of his bed just yet. One of your favorite places was being in his bed, enveloped in the smell of him, from both his cologne and his body wash. 

“Hey, you agreed to this, we go early and then grab some lunch at your favorite restaurant,” he reminds you, removing the cover from your head. You squint your eyes and stare up at him, finding a sly grin on his face. “Come on, I made your favorite.”

After five more minutes of Matthew playing with your hair and trying to coax you out of bed, you finally get up and head downstairs, where he had everything plated and prepared for you. He made chocolate chip pancakes with turkey bacon, fresh fruit, and scrambled eggs with cheese. You were so glad that Matt loved to cook, otherwise you’d just be having a simple granola bar instead of a nice, cooked meal.

“Alright, I have everything packed and ready to go, so if you want to go get dressed while I put everything away and wash the dishes,” Matt says, taking your empty plate and setting it in the sink with his.

Once you were dressed in a sweater and jeans, all your usual jewelry on, and perfume sprayed a few times, you join your boyfriend in the living room, where he sat scrolling through his phone. Hearing your footsteps, his head pops up and a huge smile spreads across his lips as he jumps to stand.

“Ready?” His hand reaches for yours and you follow him out to his car. While you were getting dressed, he took time to put his duffle bag in the backseat, so you could just get up and go when you were done.

The drive consisted of soft music from your shared playlist, and Matt’s hand in yours, gently stroking the back of it like he did this morning, and like he always does when you two hold hands. It was a rather gloomy February day in Florida, and despite others hating it, you loved it; cloudy weather was so comforting, when it didn’t mean tornadoes and severe weather.

Thankfully, it wasn’t too crowded at the rink, considering it was a weekday at ten in the morning, it was the perfect slot to spend time with Matt and also not make a fool of yourself completely if you were to have an accident.

Once your skates were rented, Matt helped you lace them up, talking you through it all since he could tell your nerves were starting to kick in.

“They have to be laced pretty tight, and figure skating ones are different from mine, but they kinda work the same. So…” his voice tapers off as he finishes tying them, “that should be good. Do they feel alright? Not too tight to the point where you can’t feel your shin?”

His hands take ahold of yours as he helps you stand and walk along the padded area to get a feel for them. He already had such a wide smile on his face because he was so happy that you were finally going to share the space he loved being at the most, aside from being with you, of course.

“Yeah, I think they’re good,” you let him know, heading back over to the bench you were sat on. He finishes tying his own skates, something he has mastered to do quickly at this point in his life, and before you know it, he is walking you over to the entrance to the ice.

Immediately, you freeze, but Matt steps onto the ice like it’s no issue.

“Remember what I promised you, baby?” He raises his eyebrows in concern. Fear was very evident in your eyes, and as much as he wanted you to skate at least one time around with him, he didn’t want to overstep any boundaries or push you too far. “Hey…it’s gonna be okay. Why don’t you sit down for a little while more?” 

He guides you to a nearby bench and stands behind you, giving your shoulders a small, comforting massage. Leaning down, he kisses your cheek swiftly and then comes around to sit beside you.

“We can sit here for as long as you want until you are ready, if you are,” he reassures you. “We don’t even have to do this today. You coming with me has been enough.”

His sweet sounding voice calms your anxiety almost instantly, something you noticed over the months as your relationship progressed. He always knew the right thing to say, as well as the tone to use in moments where you needed it most.

After a few more minutes of sitting there staring at the ice, you inhale and exhale deeply, turning your head to Matt, who raises his eyebrows in curiosity, his bright eyes filled with concern and worry.

“I’m ready,” you grin, trying to convince him that you’ll be okay. “I just have to do it scared.”

He sighs and shakes his head, reaching for your hands to squeeze them comfortingly.

“Honey, don’t say that. We really don’t have to do this, I can see how scared it’s making you.”

“No, let’s go. I really am ready.” He pauses for a moment just to make sure you are serious, and when you try to stand, he follows you and brings you back over to the entrance of the rink.

He steps onto the ice and holds his hands out for you, his own heart racing with anxiety. He was a pro, but he didn’t know if he’d be the best at assisting, even though he made numerous promises.

“It’ll be okay, honey. Just grab my hand and I’ll keep you balanced.”

With a small step onto the ledge, you step with your other foot onto the ice, your heart pounding in your chest and your body cold from fear.

“It’s alright, darling. That’s it. Now, you want to kick off with one foot and lead with the other. Can you try that?”

Taking his advice, you move as if you’re trying to walk like normal, but obviously that doesn’t work out too well. But he was calm and patient with you.

“No, not quite. Here, hold onto the wall for a moment and I’ll show you.”

Clutching onto the wall like your life depended on it, he takes a moment to skate in front of you very effortlessly, not at all surprising considering skating is like second nature to him.

He comes back around and smiles widely, stopping just a few feet in front of you. You stare at him blankly, as if to say “are you fucking serious?”

“Come on, try it,” he pushes, reaching back out for your hands to coax you from the wall. Bracing yourself, you gently nudge yourself from the wall and follow him, attempting to copy his movements.

“There you go! You so got this,” he beams with pride.

Still, you stumble here and there but his strong grip keeps you standing. Before you know it, you realize that you made an entire lap around the rink. Just to be safe, Matt steps off the ice and wrap you up in a celebratory hug

“You did it! I’m so proud of you, baby!” He plants soft kisses all over your face, eliciting a giggle from you.

“Yeah, yeah. That’s because you were basically pulling me.”

“It was all you, believe me. I was there for guidance only. Wanna go around again?” This time, you nod eagerly and put one foot back on the ice, allowing him to get his footing first before you place your other down.

Just like before, although you were starting to get the hang of it, you stride along as gracefully as you can, following behind your lover, who easily skates backwards, keeping his eyes on you the entire time.

“And you said you were like a newborn deer. You are far from it,” he jokes, speeding up just a little bit. Laughing, you squeeze his hands to silently let him know to slow down some, which he understands and pauses for a moment, slowing you to crash into his chest.

He wraps his arms tightly around you to keep you upright, pressing a single, sweet kiss to your lips, keeping his forehead on yours after.

“I love you,” he whispers, his eyes filled with love and adoration. “And I’m very glad you decided to do this today. I’ve had so much fun and it’s been so nice being able to do this together.”

“I’ve had a lot of fun as well. It’s not as bad as I remember it.”

“Because you’re here with me,” he winks slyly, giggling when you hit him in the shoulder playfully

“You might be right, baby.”

There’s a pause as you both just stand there, holding each other and enjoying the other’s presence. A few people populated the ice, but they stayed near the middle, chatting and taking their time practicing some figure skating tricks. You and Matt were pretty much alone, it felt like in this moment.

“Wanna try skating on your own, hm?” He asks in a hushed voice. “I’ll still be right there with you, just not holding you.”

Thinking over it for a moment, he waits for your answer, and is very surprised when you nod in agreement, his eyes widening in shock and curiosity.

“Wait really??” He had to double check to make sure his eyes weren’t deceiving him.

Soon, you were standing in front of him, your legs even with your shoulders, hands still in Matt’s for now.

“Okay, remember, push off and keep your skates close to the ice. Let me know when to let go and I will.”

Taking a deep breath, you look down at the ice beneath your feet and focus hard. He starts staking backwards, building up some speed and momentum for you, whenever you were ready.

“Okay, I think I’m good,” you tell him, slowly releasing the tight grip you have on his hands.

“Nice job, baby! Move that left foot a little smoother!” You try to do as he says, but the farther he gets from you, the more worried you grow. He was still within reach, but only if he happened to slow down.

Suddenly, you feel your balance start to wobble, and your knees shake ever so slightly. You could feel yourself losing your balance as your momentum eases.

“Matt,” you call out, your voice shaking just like your legs.

“You’re doing good, don’t think about it too hard.” He was no help, seeming so far away, too far for your comfort.

But it was too late.

Your foot catches beneath you and slips, and within seconds, you were falling to the ground. Matt’s voice filled your ringing ears, but you couldn’t make out a word he said. All you felt was pain.

“Hey, hey! Look at me,” he cradles your cheek, moving you as gently as ever to sit up from where you fell on your arm.

Wincing, you attempt to scoot a little, but with your right hand cradling your arm against your chest, that proved to be difficult.

“I can’t move my arm,” you tell him, tears beginning to spill over your eyes and down your cheeks. Matt grew more and more concerned as time went by, not knowing how serious of a situation this was just yet.

“Did you land on it? Where does it hurt the most?” Bringing your wrist in front of you, you show him and lightly touch the area, but even that’s too much of a sensation.

“No, no, it hurts so bad,” you cry into his chest. His eyes were wide with fear and pain of his own, knowing that the person he loves the most is hurt, and because of him? That makes it so much worse.

While you continue to cry into his shoulder, Matt waves over the person watching over the rink, making sure that if someone did get hurt they’d be assisted to as soon as possible. And not even a few seconds after Matt signals this, a medic is rushing over, ready to help in any way he can.

“Come on, we’re gonna stand up, alright?” Matt whispers in your ear, trying to remain as calm as he can. He holds your right arm tightly, the medic helping by holding your skates to secure your balance.

It took a bit, but they finally get you standing up, but Matt being Matt, decided to carry you off the ice, even though it was a short length; he wasn’t taking any more risks.

He sits you down on the closest bench and the medic comes over to assess your injury. Matt held your right hand the entire time as a way to comfort you, kissing the back of it every now and then.

“Take deep breaths, baby girl. That’s it,” he whispers, taking some of his own to help ground you and soothe your anxiety.

“You should head to the hospital. It appears to be broken, but I can’t confirm that without an x-ray. You can’t move it, it’s tender to the touch, something is definitely wrong.”

Your heart sinks to your stomach and your eyes drift to Matt. He nods in agreement, lips tightly pressed together, seemingly attempting to keep himself from crying. He thanks the medic, who gathers his things before heading off.

“Let’s go,” he mumbles, beginning to take your skates off for you, and then following with removing his own. He doesn’t say much the entire time, mainly because he doesn’t know what to say. This was his fault, you got hurt on his watch, and he was beating himself up over it silently, but you had an idea of what was going through his mind.

Matt helps you to the car but before he gets into the driver’s seat after shutting your door, he crouches down and takes a few deep breaths, feeling his anxiety rising and the start of an attack; thankfully, it goes away and a minute later, he hops in the driver’s seat and drives off in the direction of the nearest hospital.

A few hours spent there, in the very quiet emergency room that smelled so strongly of cleaning products, it was confirmed that you broke a bone on the outer part of your wrist, as well as a small bone in your thumb joint.

Four hours later, the two of you are walking into Matthew’s home, a light blue cast on your wrist, exhausted and desperately wanting pain medication. Matt drops his duffle bag with his skates on the ground, no intention of putting it away anytime soon.

Not many words are spoken between the two of you, and Matt heads to the bathroom to get you some ibuprofen and water. He returns and finds you curled up on the couch, scrolling through to try and find a movie or show to watch. 

He kisses your forehead and also gets an ice pack for you from the freezer, and once he situates it on your cast, he heads upstairs to his bathroom, taking his time to shower and get dressed in comfy clothes. Realizing you had yet to eat anything but a small bag of chips, he quickly orders your favorite takeout from his phone to be delivered within the next twenty minutes.

Matt felt awful. He didn’t want to go downstairs and face you, this was his fault. He wasn’t able to keep you safe and unharmed, and he was terrified of what you were going to say to him now that you are in the comfort of his home.

But, he knew he had to face the issue and go down there to hold you in his arms, to care for you now that you’ve gotten hurt.

He takes a torn, old shirt of his and a pair of sweats before heading back downstairs. There, he finds you half asleep, watching an episode of Catfish, though he could tell you were barely paying attention.

“How are you feeling?” He finally speaks, coming to sit next to you. Your head lifts up and you smile at him.

“The medicine kicked in a little bit ago so it’s not terrible. I’m just tired.” A sigh passes his lips and he so desperately wants to reach for your hand, but he doesn’t.

“I know, baby. We’re gonna take the rest of the night slow. I ordered some food so you’ll be able to eat. I can help you shower if you want to, all we have to do is wrap a plastic bag around your hand. I’ll take care of everything.”

His voice held so much hurt and regret. Sighing yourself, you grab his hand with your right hand and squeeze it softly, letting him know you are fine.

“Matt, it’ll be okay. I know you’re beating yourself up over this, but I need you to understand that it’s not your fault.”

“It is. I forced you onto the ice when you didn’t want to go.”

“I distinctly remember agreeing to go because I wanted to do that with you, Matthew. I wanted to skate with you, I wanted to try it on my own, and it’s not like you shoved me to the ground or tripped me. I was my clumsy self and lost my footing.”

“But I should have listened to you when you told me you weren’t that good on the ice.”

“I was until I wasn’t. And that’s not your fault.” Matt’s eyebrows furrow together in confusion, but you brush it off. “Overall, I’m not upset with you, I don’t regret going, and I sure as hell won’t hold this against you. Accidents happen, baby, and that’s okay.”

Matt listens to your words and finally nods. He brings your entwined hands up to his lips and presses a gentle kiss to your own.

“I love you,” he whispers, staring down into your eyes. “I love you so much, you have no idea.” Chuckling softly, you lean over and kiss him, finally feeling able to get up and move around a bit.

“I love you too, honey. Always will.”

After devouring the takeout food Matt ordered and icing your cast once more, Matt brings you upstairs, two plastic bags and a couple hair ties in his hands. With ease, he wraps your cast in the bags, securing it with the hair ties. He was tender and sweet as he helped you shower, planting kisses on your cheek or your bare shoulder every now and then, taking matters into his own hands and washing your hair and body for you.

Drying off and making sure you were comfortable in the clothes he picked out, you both head back to the couch and curl up, Matt getting another ice pack for you as the pain meds start to wear off a little. He kept them nearby on the coffee table just in case.

You had picked out a movie to watch just as rain had started falling on the house, a calming sound to ease your mind. Matt had you tucked into his left side, your cast-ridden hand laying on his stomach. The moment you took the ice pack off, Matt brings your hand up to his face and starts kissing your exposed fingers, one by one  on the knuckle.

He then gently rubs his thumb over the cast, his eyes filled with a somber look as he assesses the damage he still feels like he caused. You could tell that’s where his mind was going, so you pull your hand away and reach up to turn his face towards you.

“Hey, stop that,” you whisper, kissing his jaw.

“I feel terrible,” he whispers, his voice cracking as he tries to keep the tears in. You move to sit up and fully cradle his face in your hands.

“Listen to me, baby. I will be okay. A broken wrist will heal, I don’t need surgery to reconstruct anything, just this for six weeks and then a brace. I don’t need physical therapy to learn how to use it again, it will be alright. Things happen. I really don’t want you taking all the blame and the guilt for this when it’s not your fault. Yeah, you got me out on the ice, but it was me who slipped and it was me who tried to catch myself.”

“It wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t let you go,” he mutters, and you realize that there’s no way of getting through to him. So, you roll your eyes and lay back against his chest.

“Okay, Matthew,” you grumble, not really in the mood to fight or argue if he wasn’t going to listen. This seemed to strike Matt in a way that filled him with regret, because then he was sighing and shaking his head. 

“You’re right,” he whispers. “I’m…I feel terrible about it, but you are right. It wasn’t all on me, I tried my best to help you, but accidents do happen, and I understand that. It was my idea and that’s why it’s affecting me so bad.”

A few stray tears fall down his cheeks but you are quick to wipe them away.

“I understand, honey. But you wanted to share something you love with me, and I wanted to share it with you as well. If it wasn’t you, and it was my friends trying to get me to go, I would have refused. But I know how important hockey is to you and being on the ice in general. I wanted to try this with you. Remember what I said earlier?”

He nods, recalling back to how you reassured him everything was okay between the two of you, and you had no hard feelings for him regarding this.

“I meant every word before, and I still do. I’ll survive, it’s just a little bump in the road.”

Your second talk of the day seemed to have calmed him down much more, and you were thankful for that. So, you settle back down in his arms, his left hand rubbing up and down your back.

“Can I be the first one to sign your cast?” He asks after a little while of comfortable silence, watching the movie. You giggle and look up at him, wondering if he was being serious or not.

“Go get a sharpie,” you move away from him. Within a minute, he returns from his office with a sharpie he uses to sign memorabilia that the team and other companies send him, plopping down beside you. He carefully holds your cast in his hand and searches around for the perfect spot. He ends up writing right below your knuckles, and horizontal on the section on your forearm.

The forearm spot read “i love you - matty” with a little heart beside it, and the spot underneath your knuckles read “i’m sorry :(”. You laugh at his enthusiastic mood before he hands you the sharpie. You draw some random shapes along it in random spots, just to fill it in a little.

“You know everyone on the team is gonna want to sign it,” Matt says, pulling you back into his chest.

“I’m not sure there’s enough room,” you say, examining the amount of space of the medium-sized cast; it covered your fingers all the way up to the second set of knuckles, and ended ¾ of the way to your elbow. Your thumb was separated to keep it structured as well, but it was quiet comfortable. And an easy way for Matt to hold your hand.

“You could always break another bone to give them more room,” he jokes. And this time, it wasn’t a self-deprecating joke about how he was responsible for the break, you could tell just by the tone of his voice, it was light and airy, hinting at the fact he was trying to lighten the mood.

“Maybe I’ll break my leg skiing, then they’ll have a field day.” Matt can’t contain his laughter, his head thrown back and eyes fluttering shut.

“Oh, please don’t let that happen. One cast is enough for now, baby girl.”

[jtl-fics]

Fluent Freshman - Part 14

PREVIOUS

When Andrew came out of his bedroom to grab a second Allen wrench (he’s working on the frame of the dresser while Neil builds the drawers) he finds quite a few things to irritate him.

1st was the sound of his brother and his cousin arguing loudly. Andrew had been pretty clear that they needed to be quiet that morning but following Andrew’s clearly given guidelines was NEVER either of their strong suits.

2nd was the fact that there was a smell in the air that Andrew was unsure of. It wasn’t a bad smell. It didn’t smell like Nicky had left some component of the breakfast FF had bought to burn. Andrew sniffed the air again and…..lavender? It wasn’t really a smell that existed in the house of three college student boys.

3rd and most irritating was the fact that FF was not where Andrew had left him four hours ago on the couch. Again, Andrew had been pretty clear to both Nicky and Aaron that FF was to be left ALONE. FF hadn’t been able to go to sleep until Andrew had promised that nothing would happen to him while he slept.

He moves towards the kitchen table where Nicky and Aaron are eating some of the sour patch kids that FF had brought back as they argued, “He can’t be serious that Kate and I gross him out more than Andrew and Neil! I’ve seen how fast he walks away when they start getting gross.” He hears Aaron say.

“Aaron I have watched Smithy climb out a second story window because you and Katelyn started making out and he’d have to walk closer to you to go out the door.” Nicky returns. “I think you made him mad when you implied he was grossed out by Andrew and Neil. This is why I get spoon privileges and maybe, if Smithy is feeling forgiving, you can swipe your finger around the bowl.” he points at Aaron.

Andrew hangs back just out of sight.

He knows that FF does not like to be subjected to seeing PDA. A part of him feels…better at the confirmation that it really isn’t because him and Neil are both men. FF has seen them hold hands, kiss chastely, and lean on one another and been unbothered by that it was only when it started getting a little heated that  they’d realize that FF had left. FF never makes a scene about it, never scoffs in disgust or squeals in delight he just seems to see where it’s going and will leave if he doesn’t want to see it.

It’s nice.

“Well he’s probably mad at you for waking him up. Andrew said to leave him alone.” Aaron returns.

“He needs breakfast! He also has to take his ulcer meds at the same time so he had to wake up and eat something. He can go back to sleep after!” Nicky defends.

Andrew scowls. Ok. Nicky could live if that was the reason he woke FF up. Still, why the hell is FF in the kitchen and more importantly what bowl and spoon are Aaron and Nicky arguing over?

Andrew tunes his family’s argument out and heads to the kitchen to find FF putting a baking dish into their oven while incense burned on the counter (Andrew now realizes that was the thin box that had been in with the rest of the candy)

He sees the bowl and spoon that Nicky had mentioned and more importantly he can see the chocolate brownie batter on them. Andrew walks over to the bowl and picks it up. He wipes his finger along the inside and…

He closes his eyes for a moment to savor the flavor of the batter. He leans against the counter and his hand brushes against….a five hour energy bottle. Andrew knows he had thrown out the two he had found in FF’s bags before (Ulcer + exhaustion + FF = bad he didn’t need to be a math major like Neil to understand that math.)

Andrew shoves the bottle in his sweatshirt pocket as FF turns around and stares at him passively. FF’s eyebrow’s raise slightly but there’s no other reaction. Andrew considers that, perhaps, FF had wanted to lick the bowl.

He offers the spoon instead knowing it is the better prize but FF is the one who bought the ingredients and mixed together this amazing batter, so he gets first dibs.

“That wouldn’t be good for my stomach.” He declines and Andrew wonders if FF had taken his meds yet or, in his tired state, he’s forgotten to.

“When did you wake up?” Andrew asks.

“Hour ago.”

He should go back to sleep after he takes his meds but also knows that FF probably won’t go to sleep until the brownies are done.

“I’ll make the pie tomorrow.” FF says and Andrew blinks out of his thoughts.

Andrew decides to go get FF’s meds for him. He’ll make it clear to FF later that the guy doesn’t HAVE to keep making amazing desserts as a thanks for being invited to Columbia. If FF just so happens to WANT to keep making amazing desserts then Andrew isn’t going to be the person that stops him.

He shoves the spoon in his mouth and heads out to go find Smith’s bag and his meds.

Aaron and Nicky see him and both let out outraged noises as their quarry had been stolen.

Andrew ignores them and gets to the bag by the couch.

Who the fuck just has 14 bottles of five hour energy sitting in their bag??

***

When Andrew handed FF his ulcer meds he could admit to feeling grateful even if Andrew had obviously gone through his bag to grab it. He swallows it dry because Andrew is standing by the sink and he knows that until Andrew eats a brownie he is not in a position to ask for favors big or small.

(He learned his lesson from that one time with Captain Neil. If he wants to do anything related to Russian he has to be in the safety of his lofted bed under the cover of night and the cover of his…covers while he reads via flashlight. He will not be caught so flat footed again! These are all necessary precautions!)

Andrew seems to very much want for FF to be in prime condition for the hunt. Part of him wonders if he’ll be released amongst other game animals and FF had never felt more jealous of the turkey who got pardoned by the president the day before. Why does that stupid bird get all the luck? Where’s his presidential pardon?

That grateful feeling evaporates into a dust cloud as Andrew lifts a plastic bag, “Stop drinking these.” Andrew hisses, “They’re going to make your ulcer worse.” He points at FF.

“I need them.” He says.

“For what?”

“Five hours of energy at a time.”

“Pull out the brownies and go back to sleep Smith.”

“They still have 10 minutes.”

“Then I’ll pull them out in 10 minutes.”

“There’s a final step that I have to do once they’re fresh out of the oven.”

“What is it.”

“Smith Family Baking secret. I don’t make the rules.” FF gestures towards where the incense continues to burn, “Great Gran’s recipe and methods cannot be shared with non-blood relatives. My mom wasn’t even let in on the secret.”

Thank god

Andrew glowers at him.

Oh God

“It’ll be just 20 more minutes.”

Andrew’s eyes narrow at him.

“They’ll be worth it.” He pleads.

Andrew rolls his eyes.

“Go to sleep when they’re done. Take Nicky’s room.” Andrew commands.

“Take Nicky’s what?” Nicky leans into the kitchen.

“Smith is going to go back to sleep on your bed.”

“Yeah you look like shit Smithy. Don’t worry, unlike Neil and Andrew’s bed mine is all safe.”

Nicky zips out of the kitchen with Andrew hot on his heels. Nicky really is a good friend.

He performs the sacred rites necessary upon the brownies when they come out of the oven and takes a small corner piece to taste test and -

He closes his eyes and clasps his hands together in prayer.

‘Thank you Great Gran.’ He prays earnestly.

‘Remember to wash behind your ears’ he thinks he hears a whisper of grandmotherly advice in return.

That was probably normal.

He extinguishes the incense.

He cuts up the brownies, finds a decently sized plate, and sets the brownies out on the counter before he starts to work on doing the dishes. Yeah Yeah he could have been cleaning while he waited for the brownies to cook! That’s what you always do right? Clean as you go?

Well have you ever been baking brownies that might be the difference between life and death? No? Well then FF is just going to have to stop you right there because he had the oven light on and his eyes GLUED to these fudgey squares.

Who knows what the cousins’ oven would do? He doesn’t know this oven. He and this oven are taking their first whirl together and it could decide to turn on him at any time. They don’t have the brotherhood that he and the oven at his Gran’s house have built over the years! This oven could be one of those ones that maintain their temperature by turning on the broiler! He felt like he could never again recklessly trust an oven after he tried to make crescent rolls in the Viking Oven at his step father’s house and had gotten them back blackened by the broiler.

That oven had been the SINGLE thing he had been excited about during the kitchen remodel which means naturally it was the thing that had betrayed him.

He lets himself think of all the ways he hates the Viking brand as he finishes the dishes and puts everything back to where they belong.

He walks out of the kitchen with the platter of brownies and sets them down on the table where Aaron and Nicky are sat. “Oh my god they smell amazing.” Nicky says and immediately his hand is shooting towards the plate and picking up a corner piece.

FF valiantly resists the urge to slap his and Aaron’s hands away. He needs these to compel Andrew into letting him live.

“Oh wow, those do smell good.” He hears Captain Neil’s voice and when FF turns around Captain Neil and Andrew are both there. It is only in that moment that he realizes that he should have bought some vanilla ice cream to go with these.

Andrew’s love of ice cream was not unknown, probably even infamous. He was the man who, during the summer training, had been so possessive over the soft serve machine in the cafeteria that anyone who wanted any had to ask Captain Neil to get them a bowl or risk being threatened.

He starts towards the door. At this point Target probably isn’t even that bad, probably just some irate people who didn’t come with the rush and are mad they missed out, maybe some officers talking to witnesses on who threw cast the first Wii remote, and workers who will hate him marginally less (unless he gets the same check out person and they remember him (unlikely))

His progress is arrested by a hand grabbing his hoodie.

“Where are you going?”

“I forgot Ice Cream.” And he could get a five hour energy to slam on the way back home.

He then finds himself being pulled down an unfamiliar hallway.

Ah, the anticipation had been killing him more than the fear of his demise. His brownies had not contained the requisite amount of grandmotherly love to save him he had been relying on extract (Great Gran’s spirit guiding his hands) instead of organic (he does not have grandchildren or children for that matter)

Maybe ice cream would have been the deciding factor? He’ll never know.

He closes his eyes and lets himself be dragged. He’s too tired to fight.

A door opens, and he finds himself sat on a bed.

Weird.

“You are falling asleep standing up. Go back to sleep. I’ll leave you at Eden’s if you fall asleep in the booth.” Andrew threatens.

What.

FF knows about Eden’s.

He has heard about it from Nicky trying to get him to agree to go but he’s pretty sure it’d be like introducing an Amazon rainforest frog to the Sahara desert in terms of survivability for him.

“We’re going to Eden’s tonight?” He manages to ask.

Andrew raises an eyebrow at him but answers, “Yes.”

“I’m not really interested in clubs. I don’t drink out in public or dance.”

“Neither does Neil. I just drink. We can stay in the booth.”

“I don’t want to interrupt your time with Captain Neil.”

“It’s fine, neither of us hate spending time with you.”

“I don’t have clothes for a place like that.”

“Nicky grabbed some for you. You’re coming tonight. Go to sleep.”

With that Andrew pulls Nicky’s curtains close, shuts off the light, and closes the door.

FF, always very much like a bird when placed into a suddenly dark environment, starts to feel some of the  exceptional sleepiness that he’d been pushing off through sheer manic desperation to earn another day of life.

He lays down in Nicky’s bed and is tired enough that he can ignore the sheer amount of body glitter on the sheets (does Nicky excrete it like sweat??) and starts to let himself drift off to sleep.

Eden’s might be something completely out of his wheelhouse but-

A conversation with Nicky from when he’d been trying to get FF to go comes into his mind and he sits straight up in bed as Nicky’s words roll around in his head like stale hotdogs at a gas station.

“Eden’s is cool, even though there’s some sick shit in the basement.”

Eden’s is a Secondary Location with a BASEMENT.

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

NEXT

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[ciaonicole85]

Part 2: What Then?

I promise I have a life, but I couldn't help writing part 2 today! This takes place the same day as the "Development Day" when Syd and Carmy are thrown off by each other's answers during an ice breaker activity. Post-season 2. Feel-good fluff.

Photo Credit @drrav3nb /  drrav3nb.tumblr.com

"So those are the menu changes for Chicago Restaurant Week. If you have questions, feel free to ask me or Chef Sydney. You should also have an email from Natalie by later today. Okay, let's prep for night service!"

Carmy closed the meeting, grateful that it was finally over. He was no longer afraid of public speaking after rising in the ranks of various kitchens, but his mind was not in this ever since the ice breaker. He, Carmen Berzatto, had made Sydney's favorite meal ever? The last time he prepared the pork confit and the Milk and Honey dishes she mentioned was several years ago. Back then he was at Eleven Madison Park, a rising star on the culinary scene, who chain-smoked, slept 3 hours a night, and was berated by the EC daily. It was a nightmare peppered with flashes of genius. He was dying to ask her about it, but before he could get her attention Sydney had slipped into the kitchen.

He stared disappointed at the window that separated the dining area and kitchen.

"Hey Bear, what's up with you?" Richie said sidling up to him trying to follow his gaze.

"Nothing cousin."

"Yeah, right. I missed when it happened, but it seems like you crashed and had to reboot during the meeting. Then you were lost in Sydney-land. Want to talk about it?"

Carmy rubbed his eyes and raked his hands through his hair. When he used both hands, Richie knew without a doubt he had hit on something.

"First, cool it about Syd. That handout you gave us was really cute. And yes, there's something on my mind, but it's not for me to say."

Richie grinned and rubbed Carmy's shoulder.

"Fine, just get your head together because tonight is going to be loaded and it includes three anniversaries and a birthday. And second, you need to cool it about her or do something. It's like I'm living in The Wonder Years with Kevin and Winnie."

"What?"

"Oh, right. That's probably before your time. Kids!"

With that Richie sauntered over to the host stands to strategize with the wait staff and hosts.

Meanwhile in the kitchen, Sydney who had a thousand things to do, was adding at least a hundred more onto her plate. She didn't want to appear like she had a moment to spare. She and Carmy could talk at the end of the night as usual, without any eavesdropping. This would also give her time to think of an explanation as to why she never mentioned eating at Eleven Madison Park and that she wasn't a stalker who followed him to The Beef. To top off this awkward sundae, Carmy casually admitted his favorite part of the day was closing, the only time they are alone every day. She hoped no one else had connected the dots on that last part.

The afternoon and the night never went quicker to her chagrin. Even when one of the line cooks was sent home due to illness and a large group put in an order for 7 Fishes two minutes before tickets closed, she thought the night couldn't last long enough. Fortunately, Carmy seemed resigned to waiting and didn't look at her more than usual. In a flash service was over and no one was in the mood to hang around. By 11:00pm Sydney had cleaned her station for the third time and forced herself to go to Carm's office. He sat there pretending to do busy work, patiently waiting like a child who consoled himself that his parents wouldn't make him wait too long to open his Christmas presents.

"Hey Syd...it was a good night," he said softly not wanting to scare her away.

Sydney nodded and took a seat. Might as well get it over with it.

"Okay, yes. You made the best meal I've ever had. During a break at the CIA, I went to NYC and ate everywhere on my list, including Eleven Madison Park. It was a Wednesday night and I ordered several things including pork confit and Milk and Honey."

Sydney couldn't help closing her eyes and smiling at the memory. Her guard began to slip.

"Carm, it was like tasting my future and the best part of my past at the same time. I asked the waiter who made those dishes and he said Carmen Berzatto."

Carmen leaned forward on the desk. Whenever Sydney praised him, he felt like a cactus in an unexpected downpour. He wouldn't waste a single word. Her sunny existence and her belief in him sustained him during his dry seasons. He reached for her whenever he looked at the debt they still owed Uncle Cicero, when his mother finally visited The Bear and cried saying that he had erased Mikey, and even when their success seemed too good to be true. 

Sydney opened her eyes to find him looking at her in the way he had. It was terrifying because she had a very specific plan for her career. It also thrilled her, knowing the power she had over him. Five months ago, she had been begging for his focus and now she knew every her mood, glance, and word she spoke impacted him. Once for the fun of it during a slow night she stared at him until she drew his attention and smiled. He blushed, smiled back, came towards her without saying "corner", and crashed into one of the servers, sending three Michael cannoli to the floor. That was three months ago when she first realized something was going on with him. She'd refused to abuse her power since, going so far as to convince herself that she was overestimating his feelings. Then he said the best part of his day was closing. She hoped, well sort of hoped, that they could maintain this close, but not too close partnership and friendship without complications.

After a long pause Carmen sighed and sat back in his chair.

"So, how did you find me?"

"Well, like I said when we met, it was the job posting. I recognized your name and also The Beef from my dad taking me here."

She shrugged thoughtfully.

"It felt like it was meant to be. It gave me hope for the first time since Sheridan went under."

He nodded.

"It's really strange. You came here because I inspired you and the only reason, I felt capable of attempting something this big was because of you" he said gesturing to the ceiling.

"Yeah?" Sydney whispered.

"Yeah."

He stood up and walked around to sit on the desk facing her. Now, Sydney felt vulnerable looking up at him. It was so easy for him to unnerve her when he spoke this way, like under the table.

Carmy took one her hands and after a moment brought it to his lips.

"Thank you for telling me, Syd. It means a lot."

Sydney was unable to speak. Her throat had closed.

"Soon, is your one year work anniversary and I think we should celebrate."

She nodded.

Carmy set her hand down.

"It's late. I'll drive you home."

With that they left the office, gathered their stuff, and walked to his car in silence.

As they drove, Sydney attempted to talk herself down. Was that hand kiss, an Italian thing? Possibly. It also seemed like Carmy decided to do...something, but what? Worse, she was feeling like they had traded positions in mere seconds. She'd enjoyed having the upper hand. Oh, well. With a goodnight's rest she'd be back in form tomorrow. Maybe "accidentally" brush past him, or ask him to lift something heavy for her and comment on his strength. Then it would be game over for poor Carmy bear. For now, she wouldn't worry about the work anniversary. It was probably just going to be a cake Carm commissioned Marcus to bake.

Probably.    

[throneofsapphics]

you really eat up every feysand fic you do, they’re sooo good!! do you think I can request one where it’s feysand x reader and reader gets assaulted by her ex when she’s walking the streets of velaris and she gets home and is in shock. Feysand immediately smells him on reader and they literally murder him. i’m literally projecting it’s ok if you don’t want to write this🖤

taking care of it 

Feysand x Reader

Summary: “We’ll take care of this,” Feyre told her, her voice gentle but she could sense the rage boiling beneath her skin - and Rhys’s. She’s glad they didn’t reach out to touch her. Y/n’s not sure if she could handle that right now.

Warnings: sexual assault, injuries, death blood, panic attack. these are heavy themes, please be cautious of the warnings

A/N: ah you’re so kind, thank you for the request, this was healing to write & for everyone who's been through something similar, you're not alone

She came in, hair tousled, lip busted, and a black eye forming. The events of the last hour rattled her. She’d barely gotten away. Nothing mattered to her now, only getting in the bath and washing his stench away. Washing away the blood dripping from her cut, burning these clothes, and sleeping. Maybe if she slept, she’d wake up to find it was a nightmare. 

She pushed the door open slowly, hoping to slip inside. 

-

Rhys heard the door open, the soft footsteps slipping in. Something was off … wrong. He met her in the hallways, Feyre closely behind him. 

His eyes took in every inch of her - the torn clothing, bruises, blood, the hollow look in her eyes and that scent … he knows that. On instinct, he slipped into her mind. 

A punch struck his - no y/n’s face, her head slamming against the brick wall behind her, an enraged male in front of her, he tore at her shirt, one fist in her hair. A commotion sounded from the other end of the alley, and she took her change, bolting and not looking back. 

Her eyes were wide when he came back out, and lined with tears. 

Rage filled him. Pure, unfiltered rage. “Mor,” he reached out to her, knowing she’s in Velaris. “I need you here. Now.” 

His cousin appeared moments later. One look at y/n, and she nodded, “do what you need to. I’ll take care of her.” 

-

“We’ll take care of this,” Feyre told her, her voice gentle but she could sense the rage boiling beneath her skin - and Rhys’s. She’s glad they didn’t reach out to touch her. Y/n’s not sure if she could handle that right now.

Mor guided her up the stairs, to the bath, and gave her some privacy - without leaving her side. 

“Can I heal these?” She asked with a soft voice, motioning to her bruised face. 

She gave a quick nod, and the female quickly took care of the small injuries. Mor didn’t leave her side the entire night, handing her water and some food, keeping watch in the chair next to her as she drifted to sleep. A tonic prevented any dreams or nightmares. 

-

It didn’t take them long to find the male - and find him bragging. 

He went straight to Hewn City, to the lowest levels - ones where enemies never left alive. Rhys and Feyre didn’t waste any time making sure he had a slow and painful death. After, it was time to feed the monsters living beneath. 

-

When she woke, Mor was gone. Rhys and Feyre were in the room with her. “You’ll never have to worry about him again, darling.” Rhys promised. 

She forced a half-smile on her face and a thank you from her lips. 

“I want to …” her voice trailed, her head pounding as the memories flooded back through her. Of what happened the night before. Her heart raced, breaths coming shallow and fast. 

A gentle caress against her mind helped her breathe, helped her bring her heart rate back down. 

She flinched as the mattress shifted, but it was Feyre. Just Feyre. She forced herself to exhale slowly, calmly. Her hand extended, there for her to take if she wanted to. Y/n eyed it warily for a minute, but slid her hand into Feyre’s. Her thumb ran soothing strokes over her knuckles. “We’re here my love, we’re both here,” she murmured, and y/n managed to drift into a peaceful sleep. 

[jackhues]

can you do a blurb of sidney meeting bee for the first time

ooh i'd love to! i hope you guys like this :)

buttercup's world! au masterlist

sidney couldn't feel his hand.

his baby momma was in labour and in the process of turning his hand into mush. he didn't even know it was possible to grip something that tight, but of course, pain made people much stronger than they were sometimes.

and giving birth was not an easy process.

he'd been in the delivery room for a few hours, driving the child of his mother here the second she called to let him know her water broke. her parents weren't in contact with her, but sidney's parents were waiting at home. waiting for sidney to call and tell them their grandchild was here.

"i can't do this, i - i don't want to do this," she cried, shaking her head.

"you're so close, just one more push, come on," the doctor encouraged her. "you got this, one big push."

sidney smoothed her hair back, "hey, you're so close. it's almost over, i promise. just one more, and then the baby's going to be here."

sidney and his baby mom weren't in a relationship, they hadn't been in one for months now. their relationship itself was pretty short-lived, but sidney knew she was in pain and she didn't to be alone right now.

considering it was kind because of him she was here, he knew the least he could do was be there for in whatever way she needed. and right now, she needed someone there for her emotionally.

so that's what he was going to do.

"it's almost over," she repeated, nodding her head slightly.

at the doctor's cue, she took a deep breath, pushing once again. sidney wrapped his other hand around the one that was crushing one of his, encouraging her.

at the sound of a small cry, he gasped, turning his head to see the doctors and nurses holding a small baby. before he even understood what was happening, the nurses wiped the infant, rubbing quickly.

the baby's cries grew louder, a part of sidney breaking at that sound. but then the umbilical cord was cut, and the baby was placed on mom, a blanket over them both.

"congratulations," one of the doctors said to sidney. "it's a girl. let's give mom and baby a few minutes, i need you to fill out a few forms first."

sidney nodded numbly, his brain moving a little slower than he was used to. he just saw his daughter being born, she was right there. he was a dad, he was her dad.

somehow, sidney found himself in an office, a few forms in front of him.

"what's this?" he asked.

"well, mom told us you were giving up parental rights and were simply going to pay child support," doctor started. "since that was decided before birth, we need you to fill these out immediately after birth. that way, you can avoid complications later on."

sidney stared at the papers, realizing how close he was to just... giving up the right to having his daughter. a simple signature, he'd signed lots of things before, and he'd never have to worry about her. nothing beyond the money he'd be giving away monthly.

but for some reason, the pen felt incredibly heavy.

sidney looked up at the doctor, "is there any way we can put this off for now? i just - i mean, i just had my kid. i want, i want some time to think this over."

the doctor nodded, "you can choose to do this at any time. doing it right now would simply be the most effective and simple way. you can do it later, but be ready for a longer legal process."

"thanks doctor."

sidney made his way back to the room where mom and the baby were, finding mom half asleep and the baby in the crib.

he made his way over, peering inside and finding a small bundle, wrapped in a pink blanket and a matching little hat. her eyes were closed, long lashes leaning against her cheeks as she slept soundly.

she was perfect.

"you can hold her, you know?" the nurse spoke to sidney. "do you need help?"

"thanks, i'm - i can hold her," he assured her. he had a little sister, he had younger cousins.

he didn't remember being this nervous to hold them.

were they this small as well?

reaching into the crib, sidney took the little girl into his arms, her head fitting perfectly in the crook of his elbow. she scrunched up in the blanket, causing sidney's eyes to widen.

"shh, it's okay my princess," he whispered softly, rocking her in his arms. "i've got you. daddy's got you. you're okay, my love."

slowly, she relaxed in his arms, comforted by the sound of his voice. sidney smiled a little, continuing to talk, letting his baby know that she was safe, and that she'd always have someone to love her.

slowly, she cracked an eye open, and then another, looking up at her dad for the first time.

sidney froze in his tracks, feeling like he'd just been sucker punched. her big hazel eyes matched his perfectly, her hand wriggling under the blanket to try and get free.

sidney took that hand out, tearing up a little as she wrapped her tiny hands around his finger, squeezing tightly as if asking him to stay. sidney pressed a kiss to her hand, tucking it back in the blanket and rocking her.

she yawned, blinking a few times, before turning her head towards sidney and closing her eyes once again.

he took a seat on the couch, overwhelmed by everything that had just happened. he pressed a soft kiss to his little girl's forehead, knowing one thing for sure.

he wasn't going to leave her.

---

tags: @woodruff-edwards , @austinbutlerscaresme , @svechnikovvv ,  @hockeyboysarehot , @mysticaldonkey ,  @lam-ila ,  @babydollmarauders , @starjoyyy , @kjohnson-91  , @moldenhauers, @hischierdevils, @jackhughesily , @panarin10 , @equallyshaw , @power2myheart , @lynnismypseudonym , @beccaiscold , @akengii , @nowandkei , @cinnamonpancakes ,  @mitchymainer ,  @lifeofpriya , @marshmallow-babe, @hughesx3 , @emsully2002  ,  @starsandhughes , @huggy-hischier73 ,  @doglady5678 , @thatoneblog , @exonct07 @hughesmedicine , @qwanelledingele , @mindless-rock , @ireadthensuetheauthors , @huggy-hischier94, @slaythehousedownboots , @diary-of-jj , @fandom-oneshots-etc , @ajbird18 , @cherrysodadevils , @cixrosie , @iikximii , @xcicix , @wbkz3gras , @cole-mcward48 , @starjoyyy , @eagerkya , @idontlikelizards , @trevzeags11 , @al-lie-cat , @kjohnson-91 , @bitchy55 , @privatemythss

join my taglist!

[n1k1tty]

앤하이픈 — reacting to you drunkenly confessing to them

★ . ꜝꜞ ᳝ ࣪

이희승:

- you and hee originally came to the party as roommates

- and since he had to drive you home that night, he declined any alcohol that was offered to him

- even though u felt bad for not having your driver’s license, you still drank😜

- ….a lot

- “yn i think that’s enough for today yeah? come with me and drink water”

- he sat you down on the counter and you were just mumbling abt ANYTHING😭

- “yn do you want ramen when we get back?” “no hee, i want you” you poked his chest and started giggling scarily 😟😟

- “yeah? do you like me?” “so so so much!” he starts laughing

- “okay we’ll talk about this when you’re sober okay? now can you ride my back?”

- “no” 🙄🙄🙄 “i’ll be your boyfriend if you hop on my back right now~”

- *immediately hops on* “you’re so cute”

박종성

- he’s been telling you to stop drinking for the past hour cuz he knows how bad it gets😭😭

- and as expected, you were kinda fucked up

- “jay stop it! a few more shots and im done, i promise” “you’ve said that like a trillion times already!”

- *proceeds to drag you to the backyard away from the small crowd of ppl*

- sits down the edge of the pool to dip your feet in

- “you look so pretty right now, jay” he literally gets so flustered, still teases u tho “woah don’t go catching feelings on me now🤭”

- “that’s not even my fault! you’re just so cute and it’s annoying🙄” your words were literally slurred😭😭😭

- “oh no! i just confessed didn’t i? please dont remind me about it if i forget tomorrow” you literally start to cry😭😭😭

- “yeah? but what if i want you to remember?” “uhmmmmm i don’t know then”

- “i want you to remember this”

- *SMOOOOOCHHHHH for like a very long time*

- after that u were like a little breathless, foreheads still touching each other

- “oh no, i’m like really sober now” you start to panic “hey at least you won’t forget the part where i ask you to be my girlfriend”

- “what?” “will you be my girlfriend?”

심재윤

- you slept over at with the hyung line and ofc, drinking was a must😜

- and while jake was cooking ramen, you went into the kitchen to get another drink

- AND U CANT HELP BUT LITERALLY DROOL AT HIS BROAD SHOULDERS

- “oooo hi jakey” he starts laughing “hi yn, you wna do a little taste test of my famous ramen?”

- obviously you agreed bcs who wouldn’t 🙄

- “you like it?” “it’s reallyyyyyy reallyyyyy good, but you know what i like more?”

- “tell me” HE LEANS INTO YOU OMG AKNEKDSNKFS AND THEN “i like you more”

- “yeah? really? how much?” and then you open ur arms wide to show him

- “only that much?” “well how much do u like me?”

- “i like you this much”

- he leans on the counter, grabs u by the waist and places his finger under your chin and KISSES U🏃🏻‍♀️💨💨

- AND UR HEART IS LITERALLY BEATING SO FAST LIKE JAKES RIZZ IS TOO GOOD

- until u heard sizzling and u remembered that there was a ramen being cooked

박성훈

- u and hoon r like neighbours

- and one time his parents were out, he told you to come over and ended up stealing a few bottles of soju from his parents ☠️☠️☠️

- and while u guys were watching a romantic movie and sobbing your eyes out for a good 5 minutes

- you were already really drunk after drink a bottle and a half “we could be like that hoon”

- he literally was so shocked😭😭😭 “huh?????” - “ugh hoon, i like you!”

- HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW HOW TO PROCESS IT, NOT WITH AN INTOXICATED MIND

- poor hoon😭 he was so confused

- “it’s okay if you don’t like me back, i never really expected you to—“ “but i like you”

- u literally LOOKED AG HIM SO FAST and started crying “oh no im dreaming again aren’t i”

- “no no no you’re not, this is real” he literally had to hug u for so long bcs u kept crying abt everything 😭😭😭

김선우

- u were with your cousins and they wanted to have a cousins night and cane over to have a drink

- and u were so drunk that u started to cry and they had initially asked u to call ur best friend yunjin

- but u didnt know u ringed sunoo instead☠️☠️☠️

- “yunjin :( sunoo is so good to me, i really love when he smiles, it’s like my day is automatically better”

- he literally just listens to u just ranting about him🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️💨

- “yeah? what else do you like about him?”

- “he’s just the nicest person i’ve ever met, and i really just want to have him in my arms, watch movies together and do all that cringe stupid couple stuff”

- “well i think sunoo would want to do those things with you too” “don’t get my hopes up, he would never go for me… also yun… why do u sound like sunoo?”

- YOU LITERALLY START TO PANIC ONCE U SAW HIS CONTACT NAME ON YOUR SCREEN LMAOOO

- “sunoo, oh my god, pls oretend you didn’t hear that omg im gna move countries—“

- “yn, once you sober up, make sure to call me tomorrow morning and i’ll pick you up by 2 o’clock, okay?”

- YOU WERE SO CONFUSED BAHAHHABDHA

양정원

- u and won r like besties of the besties

- and so when u got really drunk, u got a message from jungwon checking up on u🤭🤭🤭🤭

won</3: hey yn, u up? are u still alive?

you: hi wpnie, i missed youuyuyuuu

wonie</3: BAHHAAH yn u really need to get ur alcohol tolerance up, i don’t want other people taking advantage of u

you: :( ur so goodf to mw won how am i sypposef to stpp liking you if ypu make me feel like thos all the time

wonie</3: i dont want u to stop liking me though 🤔

you: stfu stoo playung with mw 🙄😡

wonie</3: im not tho?? yn get to bed bahaha ur too drunk

you: NO👹🤬🤬😡 i wna tslk to u

wonie</3: and i want to talk to u too, but i can barely comprehend what ur saying right now😭😭🙄

we can talk again tomorrow okay?

you: okag :( night night wonie

wonie</3: gimme kiss goodnight first 🤭

you: 😘😘😘😘😗😗😗💋💋💋

DID U GET IT?

wonie</3: UR SO FUCKING CUTE

yes yn i got it🤭 now go to sleep i’ll see you tomorrow

you: GOODNIGHTTTTTTT🫶🏻🫶🏻❤️❤️

wonie</3: GOODNIGHT🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

you: GOODNIGHTGAHSHXJA ❤️❤️❤️❤️🫶🏻🫶🏻💗

*it never ended until u fell asleep*

—next morning

you: fuck.

wonie</3: well goodmorning to you too🤔

西村 力

- the hyung line had initially only let u try A SIP of alcohol

- but a sip turned into another, and eventually… u got drunk😭😭😭

- and while riki was helping you get to bed and u literally just pulled him in for a hug☠️☠️☠️☠️

- he was literally like???????🤨🫂

- “yn you said one sip and look how drunk you are now😭😭”

- “can’t really help it, it’s like the only way i can calm down when im around u” BRO IS SPEECHLESS☠️☠️☠️

- “oh really? why’s that?” “because i have a hug crush on you???? i thought it was obvious, dummy”

- “oh im the dummy now? you know now im kinda upset, i dont think i like you anymore”

- “no please im sawry :(“ PINCHES UR CHEEKS CUZ YOURE SO CUTE BRO FUCK

- “alright im just messing with you, go get some sleep yeah?”

- before he was abt to get up u hold his hand🤭🤭🤭 “pls dont go”

- initially wanted to leave after u fell asleep, but instead fell asleep with u😭😭😭😔😔💔

[mrsjavierpena]

All the roads lead to a jar of pickles | Pickled Peña

summary: Javier keeps finding promises to make every New Year's Eve

pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader

warnings: fluff, alusions to smut, mentions of narcos, no use of y/n, just javi being so in love and receiving the love he deserves

word count: 4k (yeah i got carried away

IMPORTANT: English is not my first language, i've done my best with grammar but there will be mistakes (fuck prepositions i hate them), so pls overlook those

an: this is a one shot to the @pickled-pena writing challenge! i was super excited to write this and it was indeed a challenge since tumblr decided to delete what i wrote twice, but i loved to participate. also, i procrastinated and literally wrote this right before posting to no lose tbe deadline (not proud, but i made it

hope you enjoy it!

Javier didn't use to be a man to make many promises. He made a few during the years, promises like quit smoaking, clearing Colombia from cocaine, to take care of himself for his mother on her deathbed; he didn't keep any of them. It wasn't like he didn't try, though, Javier was a man of word, things just went out of his control: he did arrest Los Pepes, but the traffic of coke was at full stem ahead even without them, consuming the country, ruining and taking lives of innocent people; it was logical to imagine that taking care of himself was more under his control, but honestly, Javier didn't even know how to do that anymore, his life going south for so long it felt like changing wasn't a possibility.

He still had his father, and living with him back in the ranch again definitely had Javier in the most healthy state of his life that time. His return to Laredo caused quite the commotion, him abandoning Lorraine in the alter was never forgotten, but being part of the chasing of Escobar got him in Laredo's good grace again, he was a hero after all. He hated all of it: the praises and congratulations he didn't deserve, the back pattings and hugs that invaded his personal space, the audacity the people had to 'forgive' him, as if they were people whose opinion he valued.

It's not like he wasn't used to it, he was born and raised there and small towns had small towns' issues, but that didn't mean it didn't piss him off still. His big, nosy family was a part of it, all over his head asking "what was his plan now that he was back home", about "getting a girlfriend to become a wife and finally have kids", because "he wasn't getting any younger" and "was the only single cousin". It was like all his concerns were thrown in his face. He loved them, they were all he had left, but god, didn't they make him feel like shit. Because he had accomplished nothing in forty years, and it was clear that every person around him could notice that too.

The coming of a new year was another reminder of that. During his years in Colombia, he didn't do much other than a dinner with Steve and Connie, neither of them was in the mood of anything fancy at that time, and when they left the country, he simply worked or, in the best scenario, slept. In Laredo, though, his family wouldn't miss an opportunity to throw a party.

"What are your resolutions for the next year, Javi?" his cousin asked.

They both were in the kitchen, the task to cut pickles in very thin, even slices given to them by one of their aunts. Javi stopped his work with the knife to not lose a finger as he side eyed his cousin.

"Don't look at me like that!" she laughed "I'm asking you a question"

"What do you mean?"

"Resolutions, Javi" she rolled her eyes "Like your wishes for the next year"

"You mean, like, manifesting? Are you into that shit?" he couldn't hide the frown on his face.

"No, Javier, not manifesting, even though there's nothing wrong with that" she gave him an irritated look "You write down what you would like to change in yourself, to be a better person next year"

"Is that your way to say that I'm an asshole, prima?" he narrowed his eyes at her and she laughed loudly.

"Well, not just that" she shrugged "I like to do that every year, helps me to keep focused in what I want. And I see the look in your eyes, Javi" she wore a sympathetic smile as her hands caressed his "You have dreams you want to chase, why not start by that?"

A loud scream made them both jump in their places, a tiny human coming through the kitchen threshold with his hands thrown up in the air.

"Mijo" she laughed at the child's prank and the boy giggled.

His cousin had been married for almost ten years by then, a little boy and one girl on the way. Her being younger than him and having accomplished his dreams made a claw made of jelousy wrap its nails around his throat.

Javier wanted a wife, he wanted to marry someone he loved, he wanted to build a family of his own, he just was focused on the wrong things at the wrong time.

So he decided to start with something that should be simple, only one promise to himself: to meet someone in the coming year.

It should have, didn't mean it was, though. It was scary, he found out, to get to know someone after so long, especially at a small town where he knew almost everyone. Javier never had problems to get laid, but most of the woman he hooked up with didn't really seem interested in more than that, after a while it started to feel like a him problem. That being said, Javier didn't know how to start, so the next time another cousin of his said that he would really get along with a co-worker he had, he finally accepted.

The date was... awkward, to say the least. They went to the most popular restaurant in Laredo, every person there looking at him the whole evening; she didn't seem to mind the attention, but Javier did. He tried to make conversation, to ask about her interests, to compliment her, but he was as rusty as a cheap aluminum pot left in the rain for months, years, in his case. She would ask a lot about him, too, but not his hobbies or what he liked to hear on the radio, she would ask about Escobar, how was it like to catch bad guys, if he still had his gun. Javier tried to change the subject, but she would insist on talking about Colombia. She was curious, it was normal, he was used to it, but what a damn turn off it was. Javier felt like being in an interview, the atmosphere heavier and heavier as the questions were getting more and more personal, and by the first hour of the date, he was wishing he was at home.

Javier had this happening before, during his time chasing Los Pepes, the media would be all over him asking all sorts of questions, work related or not, and he hated it. If she wasn't an acquaintance of his cousin, he would even consider her being a fucking journalist, because it was not normal to act like that with someone you had just met.

So after that, Javier was pretty dismotivated to continue his chasing, but his family had already found out he was giving love a chance and wouldn't leave him alone. Apparently, there were many "young women" interested in Javier, according to his aunts. Javier wasn't really comfortable being putten in that position again, but decided to give it a try - few tries, actually. Blide dates were exhaustive and the most of them very unpleasant. In a blink of eyes, it was New Year's Eve again and Javier was still not in a relationship, another failed promise in his mind.

"Well, your plan was to meet someone, and technically you met, like, twenty new women. I would call it a success" Javier rolled his eyes at his cousin's attempt to cheer him up.

"There must be something very wrong with me" he sighed and she pouted.

"Don't say that, Javi! All of them wanted to go on a date with you, you were the one to reject them"

"I know, but- I don't know" he scratched his chin "They all looked at me as if I saved the world, and it's not like that, you know it's not"

She moved the newborn to her other side and sitted closer to him in the couch settled outside the house where they had been chatting for the last hour. Javier looked at the baby in her arms and felt his throat tighten.

"You think so little of yourself, Javi" all her attention was on him, but his eyes didn't meet hers "I know you didn't "save the world", but you tried to make a difference and gave your best to do so, you can't reject a girl just because she admires you"

Javier had done things terrible enough for the good ones to be irrelevants, had let shit happen when he should have tried to stop them, and he had told her that, not in details, but she was the only person beside him and Steve to know, and still thought he was a good person. And yeah, maybe he wasn't so bad after all, but he imagined letting one of those women inside, their eyes shining with pride, letting himself love her, feeling safe enough to tell her about everything and her never seeing him the same way, giving up on him because of his baggage, he knew he would if he could, so how could he put such a burden upon someone's shoulders? Who would want that?

"But I understand, I think" she spoke again, her free hand patting his shoulder "It must feel strange having someone knowing so much about you and you knowing nothing about them. Maybe you shouldn't go on these shitty arranged dates and find someone on your on"

"Yeah, I think you're right" he took her hand in his and gave her knuckes a light peck "Thank you"

"Mijo" Chucho's head appeared on the frame of the door "Would you do me a favor?"

"Of course, Pops" he stood up.

"Your aunts forg-" he was interrupted by shoutings coming from the kitchen:

"You stand there and accuse me, but where were you at the time?" was the voice of one of his aunts "Strolling through the corridors looking for fruitcakes when it's not even the season anymore!"

"You leave my fruitcakes alone!" another aunt shouted back "I don't hear you complaining when you're eating them!"

Javier looked at his father with his brows raised in curiosity, and the old man sighed "Your aunts forgot the jar of pickles, would you mind driving to the tienda?"

"No, I don't"

Most of the commerces were already closed at that time of the evening, but the tienda was the one place everyone in Laredo could count to be open at any time. The owners greeted him when he passed through the door, trying to small talk, and he turned them down the nicer way he could, wishing them a happy new year and going straight to the aisle he was supposed to. He heard the sound of broken glass followed by cursings coming from further in the store and found you staring miseraly at a burst jar of pickles on the floor, the vinegar smell all over the air and a basket full of groceries supported on your hip.

"You okay?" you looked up at him and he felt the the wind knocked out of him; you were the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his life.

"I am, yeah, that isn't" you pointed to the jar and he smiled.

Probably imagining what had happened by the noise, a man quickly showed up with a broom and a cloth to clear it up. You apologized profusely, saying that you could clean it up yourself while the man said it was no problem.

Javier looked at you one more time and left to get what he went there for. He had never seen you in the city before, and it wasn't like he was out of the ranch often - he tried very much not to -, but you should've been new there; the conversation with his cousin still fresh in his head. When he got to the dill pickles aisle, he shouldn't be surprised that you appeared in the other end of it, you had just dropped your jar after all.

"Hi again" you smiled as you walked towards him and he smiled back.

He felt something very similar to shyness creeping in his stomach "Hi"

"Just getting another one of this since mine decided this life just wasn't for him" you raised your hand and said your name.

"Javier" the handshake lingered a little longer than one normally would, your skin soft against his.

He saw the way you looked at him with interest, he should've asked you out. He should've, you were pretty, were his type and, if new in town, probably knew nothing about him. He should've, but he didn't. Thinking once then twice if he could've been reading it wrong, if you were just being nice and in the possibility to make you uncomfortable asking you out after exchanging two sentences in an aisl store. So he just took a jar, said goodbye, and left.

But something inside of him told him that you, with your bright smile and little jokes, could be the one. So he promised to himself to ask you out the next time he saw you.

And he did. After that day, he would go to the city every chance he had. He told his father he would start doing the groceries so he could rest. Chucho didn't buy that, but did nothing about it, he knew his son, so he knew better than to ask, when he wanted to talk to him, he would. It took a couple of months for him to see you again, in the most unexpected place he could think of. He had taken his father to an appointment in Houston, strolling around to pass the time when he saw you inside a café. His eyes widened and he was quick to move out of your sight before you saw him.

He was anxious, but he had been waiting for an opportunity for months and couldn't let it slide away again. Javier took a deep breath and entered the shop, a bell upon his head announcing his entrance. He pretended not to see you, going straight to the counter to ask for a coffee; he didn't want you thinking he was a stalker or something. While waiting for his drink, Javier would take glances in your direction, you sitted three tables away from him, an open book and a mug on the table before you. With his coffee in hands, he looked around and locked eyes with you, who smiled and waved at him. Even though there were plenty of unoccupied tables, Javier took confident steps towards yours.

"Mind if I join?" the smile you gave him made his skin prickle.

"Not at all" you marked a page in the book and closed it as he took a seat in the chair in front of you.

"I haven't seen you in a while" was his subtle attempt to start a conversation.

"Were you looking for me?" you rested your forearms on the table and lightly leaned in his direction.

Javier smirked, was that you flirting, or was he really that rusty? "I was, yeah"

"Good to know" you smiled again "I travel a lot for work, haven't really been in Laredo"

Before he could ask what you did for work, you asked what he was doing in Houston, so he told you about his father's semester appointment that was only available there, and that made you ask about Chucho's health, and then about the trip, since it was a very long one, but he told you he liked driving and used to do that with his parents a lot, which lead to talking about families, you said you weren't really close to yours, the conversation flowing with neither of you seeing the time pass. It was you the one to bring him back to reality, asking which time he was supposed to get Chucho in the hospital and making him realise that he was already late.

"Javier" you said as he quickly stood up to leave "I don't know if I'm reading this wrong, I really hope I'm not and I'm sorry if I am but-"

"Would you like to go out with me sometime?" the words left his mouth before without hesitation.

Your brows raised in surprised, but your smile could have brightened a whole galaxy "God, yes"

He called you the next day, not wanting to wait a minute longer than what he thought wasn't giving desperation. You set the date for the next week, when you would already be back in Laredo. He went to pick you up and got once more mesmerized by the sight of you; you laughed and affectionately squeezed his arm when he told you that. Javier took you to his favorite restaurant in the city, a cozy little place with delicious food his parents used to take him when his mother was still alive. The two of you talked the whole night: he found out that you were a photographer, had moved to Laredo a few months ago planning on settling down "I'm getting too old for all that traveling, and the house's prices are good" was what you told him. Your favorite food was mexican, you weirdly liked the smell of gasoline and wet soil, loved listening to music, still had your grandparents in your hometown so you visited often, wanted to have a dog but couldn't with your schedule, always dreamt of being a mother. You asked so much about him, too. Not the type of questions he was used to being asked, you tried to know him by asking about his childhood, more details about his parents because they seemed to have had such a beautiful love, if he had traveled out of Laredo before, which got him telling you he was a former DEA agent in Colombia, and he saw the curiosity in your eyes, he waited for the questions about that to come, but instead you just said you've had always wanted to visit South America. Years later, when he mentioned tour first date, you would tell him that you knew what was happening in Colombia at that time and that you knew better than to ask what could be invasive questions.

When you couldn't stay in the restaurant anymore because they had to close, Javier still didn't want the night to end, but drove you to your house still. As he took you to your door and wished you a goodnight, ready to leave, you held his upper arm and gave him a light peck on the lips. As if something snapped inside of him, Javier didn't give you the time to even open your eyes before his mouth were against yours again, tongues dancing together as if they already knew one another and had done this before, hands passing through each others bodies. When you asked him to go inside, he hesitated.

"I don't want you to think that's all I want" he vocalized his concerns.

"I don't" you took his face in your hands, brushed your lips on his and smiled "You're a catch, Javier Peña, I'm keeping you to myself"

Javier took his time with you, kissing every inch of your body, having you giggling and moaning and writhing under his touch. Unhurriedly making you his between wet kisses and moans and screams of his name. He would've stayed connected to your body for the rest of his life if he could've, but your agenda was booked for the rest of the year and all he could have was a couple of weeknds a month and long night's phone calls. But Javier took all you gave him without complaints, even though he missed you so much his chest tighted. He missed your smile, your laughter, your body next to his, your fingers through his hair, your kisses to wake him up in the morning, the way his name souded on your lips when he was inside of you, the weight of your head resting on his chest, the way your right leg would twine between his when you slept. The man was head over heels for you and knew you felt the same, all those nights the both of you cried on the phone, sick of being away from each other proved it.

But the both of you survived that tough time like champions, by then, the end of the year was near, and you went to get your grandparents at your hometown to spend the New Year's Eve with Javier's family, the people who raised you obviously being two of the best people he had ever met. His aunts were in love with you, the kids wouldn't leave you alone and his favorite cousin was so thrilled to finally meet you that she dramatically almost passed out. Everyone spent the night laughing and eating and talking, and watching from afar, he couldn't believe how well you fitted on his family, but he hadn't doubted for a second that everyone would love you, how could someone not to? So when he told you he loved you for the first time that night and you said it back without hesitation, Javier promised to be the best version of himself to get you to wear his mother's ring on your finger by the end of the next year.

Not everything was perfect, nothing ever is. You had some fights, you disagreed in a few things, but something you stablished the first time Javier gave in to old habits and tried to run away from the issue was that you wouldn't sleep without talking about it; no hitting doors, no leaving, no fucking the anger out, you talked and made the effort to change what was bothering. Javier had been in only one serious relationship before, with Lorraine, and damn what a difference it was. He couldn't blame neither of them, they were young and didn't know what they wanted; you, on the other hand, knew exactly what you wanted and it still shocked him that it was him. You wanted him, all flaws and errors and baggage included, you didn't let him shut you down when things got tough, and with time he learned to trust you, to count on you, to talk about his feelings, his walls slowly tumbling down. The day he told you everything about Colombia was the hardest he had ever been putten through, years of fighting drug dealers and putting his life at risk, and he had never been more frightened. Tears were shared, you didn't react very well to a few things, but you never dropped his hand, never interrupted, never distanced yourself, even thanked him for trusting you, and at the end he felt as light as a feather. You convinced him to go to therapy, emphasizing that he had to treat the psychological consequences of the terror he confronted back in Colombia.

After that, it seemed like you had reached a goal at your relationship, you spending more time at the ranch than at your own house, a great routine already settled, and you made it very clear you were ready to be asked in marriage when you said those exact words to him. Little did you know he was already planning on it, and one day, after photographing a wedding at a neighbor city, Javier welcomed you in the ranch with candles everywhere, a knee on the floor, tears on his eyes, his mothers ring in a velvet red box and the most heartwarming speech one could ever ask for. The wedding was quick to happen, neither of you wanted a big party, just your families and friends gathered in the ranch with the ceremony realized by a very emotional Chucho. Didn't take you long to get pregnant either, your life settled with you being called to take every photo in Laredo and Javier accepting a job at the Sheriff's Office; the both of you had decided to live with Chucho once he had injured his leg during work, him more than thrilled to have a grandbaby under his roof. Javi fell in love with you a little more every day that passed, more and more mesmerized by you and your growing belly. At the end of that year, he promised to be a father as good as the one he had.

And what a good father he was indeed. He dedicated his life to his family, providing all the love and dedication he had in him, gladly waking up during the nights to comfort his kids; yes, you both got tired as hell, made mistakes, got stressed sometimes, but you got the life of your dreams and the both of you had so much love to give that it didn't matter how hard things could get, you wanted it, all of it. With his one-year-old boy sleeping in his arms as you talked to your grandma on the other side of the room, your ring hand carressing your beautiful round belly that carried your next baby, he saw as his babygirl crossed the room shouting with her hands thrown up in the air to scare you, clearly influenced by her cousin, and you playfully shouted back. The dogs started barking and jumping at the commotion, the three-year-old giggling as you kissed her cheek.

Javier felt like his heart could explode inside of his chest, certain that there was no man alive happier than him, he thought about how lucky he was he went to get those pickles all those years ago. The journy the both of you had wasn't quite easy, the challenges you had to face, the expensive phone bills he got when you were apart, the fears he had to overcome, even those years in Colombia, he would have done it all again and again and again if it meant to be where he was at that very moment, to wake up everyday by your side, to always have you in the passanger seat to rest his hand on your thigh, to have the kids laughing and running around the house, to experiencing the type of love his parents had.

At that New Year's Eve, Javier kept the same promise he had been keeping the last years: to give his all to the family of his own.

"Javi, baby" you called him, your smile as wide as always "I'm craving pickles"

[theitgirlnetwork]

Better

Ch. 7: 772 Miles

Note: I'm lateeee but I'm here nonetheless! Thank you all so much for all of the love and support. I love all of the likes, reblogs, comments, notes! I hope you all enjoy this one. We're making some headway and I hope to have more out soon. Some people have asked me about a taglist, which I'm gonna be real, I don't know how to do, but I will learn and then I will add whoever wants to be added to it! There is an awkward entry to a little explicitness in here so MDNI fr. Feel free to skip that part if you are an adult and just don't want it, anything important that is discussed during it will be brought up again! Once again, thank you so much <3

Picture Lip Took of Charlotte at the museum:

“You know, I’m starting to get a little offended by how you’re not excited Kev and I scraped together the rest of the money to get you home.” V says, pushing into Charlotte’s bedroom, plopping onto the bed next to a pink suitcase. “Did you get a lock for this?”

Charlotte pulls her white top over her head, careful not to let her makeup smear onto her outfit and smooths her hair again. “I’m very grateful, V, I’m just gonna miss you and Kev.” 

“Bullshit, me and Kev.” the woman grumbles, helping smooth out the back of her cousin’s shirt. “It’ll be good for you two to spend a couple of weeks apart, cool off a little.” 

The younger woman sighs, slinging her bag over her shoulder and stopping briefly to look at her cousin. “I’ve got to go. You’ll have shipped me off to Virginia and away from Phillip by tomorrow, okay?”

V softens at the look on Charlotte’s face. The girl had been so excited to be going home for Christmas when she and Kev surprised her with the other half of the money. She hadn’t even minded buying a one way ticket, considering she’d be going for a couple of weeks. But as the date of her departure pushed closer, the excitement turned into sadness and worry. 

She would hear her and Lip in the room throughout the week, on the nights he slept over, mumbling reassurances, arguing in hushed tones, exchanging promises. V doesn’t like raining on her baby cousin’s parade, but if she doesn’t ground her, who will? Charlotte’s always been a dreamer, her parents treated her like a little princess, and for good reason. V would only see her when her mother would take her to Virginia, her auntie and uncle refusing to let Charlotte come to Chicago. They kept her sheltered from the rest of their family, even watching closely how she and V played together. So Charlotte was not very…experienced. She didn’t think twice about people asking favors of her, borrowing money, leering at her. She lives in fairytale land, expecting everyone to be kind, accept apologies, have good intentions. And V watches her cousin be absolutely devastated when the world proves her wrong. 

Now that Charlotte was getting older, it was important that Charlotte learned to care for herself, it was necessary that she learned how to live in the real world. V loves her cousin, so she volunteered to take on that project. It was never part of her plan to throw her into the deep-end that is Lip Gallagher. V feels personally responsible for the inevitable fallout that would come from this relationship. All she can hope for is that these next few weeks will let the two young adults fizzle out, and clear their heads.

“I’m not against you, Lottie.” V says. Charlotte turns at that, going over and pulling the other woman into a familiar hug. One that reminds them both of being little girls, seeing each other for the first time in a year.

“I know, V.” she whispers.

“It’s only a couple of weeks, babe.” The older cousin soothes, rubbing her hand over Charlotte’s hair. The two of them hear the front door open, and Kev’s voice starts filling the living room.

“Not a scratch on my baby.” They find Kev in the living room, towering over Lip, who’s simply looking forward, clearly spacing out and ignoring what the older man is saying. “Or Charlotte. And get her to the airport on time.”

“Got it. Total the car and make sure Charlotte misses her flight.” Lip jokes, standing and reaching for the keys, sighing when Kev pulls them away. “Alright, man, I’m kidding. Thank you for this.”

Charlotte saddles up next to him, throwing her arms around Kev, hugging him tightly. “Thanks, Kev. I’ll miss you! I’ll be back soon.”

Kev looks down at her, brows softening and sighing as he makes eye contact with V. “Sure, kid.” He says, ruffling her hair. “Get goin’, traffic.”

Lip and Charlotte make their way outside, V and Kev watch from their porch as Lip opens the passenger door, boosting Charlotte in before nodding at them and going around to the driver’s side. As the car pulls off the couple looks over to the porch next door, finding Fiona sipping a beer, shaking her head before nodding them over.

“Are you excited?” Charlotte damn near bounces next to Lip as he studies the map at the front of the museum, determined to map out a route that will keep them away from the exhibits he had deemed not worthy of their time. He drags his finger along the line he intends to follow, his other hand clasped in Charlotte’s.

“Uh, yeah.” he says, deep in focus. Charlotte just smiles as she watches him mumble to himself about the most time effective way to get them through everything. Yeah, he is, she thinks to herself, letting him guide her to the first stop.

This whole thing is not really Charlotte’s style. Most of the exhibits are focused around science and that had never been her thing. She had been more of a social studies and reading girl herself, those subjects told more stories than required her ability to understand formulas. But she was so fucking happy she’d bought these tickets. Even though his expression is schooled into a nonchalant, moderately interested look most of the time, she could tell from how Lip’s eyes light up. 

He’s been looking at her differently since that day in the park. At first she’d thought it was the tickets. Then she’d thought it was the fact that she was leaving for a while, but neither seemed to describe how those bright blue eyes study her. Whatever it is, Charlotte wants to keep causing that look. 

So she leans against his chest and listens as he points out the different parts of the submarine exhibit, attempting to describe the mechanics of putting together something he’d apparently researched in his own time.  She asks, she’ll admit, stupid questions when he tries to explain the physics behind one of the displays, just sticking her tongue out at him when he looks away, snorting before composing himself and actually answering her. 

She gives him space as he observes the portraits of different scientists of all areas, reading the little bios. Charlotte wanders to the side, finding a picture she finds a little interesting and stopping to read the little paragraph on the plaque beside it. The sound of a camera phone clicking makes her turn around and look at him. “Did you just take a picture of me?”

“You look pretty.” he smiles, stepping forward and pulling her into his arms. “Gotta add to my collection, have somethin’ to look at when you’re gone.” 

Charlotte looks up at him smiling crookedly, “You have a collection of pictures of me on your phone? What’re you obsessed with me or somethin’?”

“Nah, you just won’t fuck me and I gotta do somethin’ to help me and my hand along-ow!” he laughs when she punches his chest, wincing at his muscle against her hand. Lip wraps his arm around her shoulders, bringing her in for a kiss. “Yeah, I’m obsessed with you or somethin’.”

The tenderness of the moment makes the ache that formed in Charlotte’s chest as soon as she’d purchased the ticket throb. She sighs, scrubbing her hand along her watering eyes. “I’m gonna miss you.”

Lip groans, running a hand through his hair before cupping her cheeks, thumbs sweeping across her cheeks. “Stop, bunny, we said we weren’t doing that anymore. Because if you cry, I’m going to say something you won’t like, and then we’ll start fighting and shit and I don’t wanna fight right before I drop you off.”

“I can’t help it!” she whines.

“Don’t go.” he replies.

“Stop saying that!”

“Stop crying-” Lip glances around at the other patrons of the museum retreating toward the front, the speaker letting them know it was closing soon and Charlotte silently sobs dropping her face to his chest. “Bunny.”

“Excuse me, sir, we’re closing soon, you all should start making your way to the exit.” A security guard says, approaching.

“Yeah, okay just gimme a second.” Lip sighs, rubbing Charlotte’s back.

“And now I have to go to the airport.” she cries into his shirt. “And you’re gonna leave me there.”

“Sir-”

“Alright man, give me a fucking second.” The blond yells at the guard, who was still grumbling about them holding up the museum closing up. “Charlotte,” he says softly, pushing her away lightly, looking at her large, teary eyes. “Hey, hey, we’ll talk right? I call you, you’ll call me. And it’s only a couple of weeks right? You promised you’d come back in a couple of weeks.”

“I am.”

“Okay, then we’ll be fine.” Lip relaxes a little as the girl slowly stops crying. He wipes away the remainder of the tear tracks on her face. “Right?”

“Right.” Charlotte sniffles. “Okay, I’m ready.”

The car ride to the airport is a quiet one. Both afraid to upset the other, they sit silently as music plays lowly on the radio. Lip’s hand rests on Charlotte’s thigh, squeezing reassuringly every couple of minutes. One of her hands is on top of his, playing with his fingers as the large airport pulls into their sight and the sound of planes taking off fills their ears. 

Lip pulls into the drop off area and puts the hazards on, facing forward and watching other poor fuckers wave a somber goodbye to their loved ones and is embarrassed to say that this is about to be him. He never envisioned himself to be the ‘drive you to the airport, kiss you all over your face, call me when you land no matter what time it is’ type. But here he was, murmuring those exact words into Charlotte’s ear after doing the first two things. He takes a deep breath after releasing her from his embrace and letting her walk a little ways away before shouting in front of the rest of the travelers, staff, and his fellow sad fuckers,

“Aye, Charlotte, tell that pilot to fly safe, alright? My fuckin’ girlfriend’s gonna be on that plane.”

He laughs as the girl pauses for a second before shoving her suitcase into one of the employee’s hands and running toward Lip, slamming into him so hard his back hits the car as she kisses him. Onlookers aww at their display, causing Lip to turn a little red as Charlotte continues to kiss him before finally letting him take a breath. She leans in, nuzzling her nose against his, sing-songing “Boyfriend~” and kissing him again. 

Charlotte fully pulls away a second later, Lip lets her literally slip through his fingers as she backs away toward the terminal, laughing when she calls back, “No take-backs, Gallagher! You’re mine now! Better still want me when we’re not a couple of miles apart!” she jokes.

Lip’s bright blue eyes follow her as far as they can until she disappears into the building. “772 miles. A couple.” he snorts despite himself, climbing back into the car and pulling off, cursing when he realizes he’s gonna have to face the exit traffic by himself.

The next morning Fiona’s few hours of sleep is interrupted by the sound of pots and pans clattering. At first she’d sleepily rolled over, assuming that it was Charlotte starting breakfast for the kids. She shoots up when she remembers that Lip had dropped her off the night before at the airport so it couldn’t be her.

Creeping along the hallway so as to not wake her siblings she grabs the bat, holding it up, ready to strike in case it’s an intruder. Or Frank. When she sees a bunch of random drawers pulled out, and the pillows for the couch on the floor, she grips the bat, preparing to swing when she sees a man’s form, sifting through the drawers. “Get the hell outta my house, motherfucker-!” she yells while swinging, stopping just short of Lip’s face.

“Shit, Fiona!” he yells back, catching the end of the bat in his hand and lowering it. “What the fuck?”

“Jesus.” she sighs, dropping the weapon altogether and running a hand through her hair. Fiona pushes past her brother, starting a coffee pot before turning around to look at him. “What the hell are you doing creepin’ around the house?” 

“Lookin’ for the money for phone minutes. I need to use it on mine.”

“Sorry.” Fiona says, pouring a mug and passing it to her brother and repeating the process for herself. “That became the acid fund when Monica and Frank stole it last month. You already out of minutes?”

Lip curses his parents under breath, shaking his head as he gulps down the coffee, slamming the mug down when he’s done. “Awesome. Well, when was the last time you heard from uh, Steve? Think he’ll have some work for me I can do like, today?” 

“Really? You think work from Steve is a good idea?” Fiona asks, pulling out the frozen waffles and plugging in Kev and V’s toaster. “I don’t want you mixed up in his shit, I’ve told you that before. Anyway, no, sorry, haven’t heard from him.” Her brother scratches his hair irritably, pulling a cigarette from his pocket and putting it between his lips, leaning forward when his sister produces a lighter for him. “You didn’t come home last night. You go out after droppin’ Charlotte off?”

“Drove around for a little bit, dropped the truck off and uh, went on a walk.” he blows out the smoke, working his jaw. “Fuckin’ road the bus up to the college to talk to Youens, trying to see if I could get an advance on the next few weeks and all the fucker wanted to do was lecture me about finding another internship. Wouldn’t front me the money.” 

“Well, what do you need the money for?” 

“Don’t worry about it.”

Fiona observes her brother, watching the stress rolling off of him, tense shoulders, chain smoking, eye doing that twitchy thing it does when he’s upset. There was no question of what was bothering him either. He’s checked his phone at least three times since this conversation started. “She’s comin’ back.” She puts her arms around her little brother’s shoulders. “She call to tell you she landed?”

“Yeah the flight is only 2 hours and 7 minutes, she called me 3 minutes after that. And again once she got to the house.” He sighs, scrubbing a hand down his face.

“Little much, huh?”

“Uh,” Lip shrugs, embarrassed to admit that he felt the opposite, mumbling “Not really. I just uh, need some money to put more minutes on my phone, for the next few weeks. You know?”

Oh. Fiona thinks. She sees how miserable her brother looks and realizes she hadn’t really considered that he might be taking this seriously since this whole Charlotte debacle started. She and the rest of the kids are used to Lip getting himself wrapped up into semi-serious relationships, either thinking he’s in love or making someone else fall in love with him every couple of months. Each time something ruins it, whether it be his crippling commitment issues, nasty habit of cheating, unaddressed rage and on and off alcoholism, you name it. Or the occasional husband that the woman of the month has. It was shocking to think he’s run into that situation twice while he’s still so young, but Fiona couldn’t judge. 

She’s not sure what the nail in the coffin will be for Charlotte and Lip, and she still thinks that they’re a bad idea. But something about how upset the kid is makes her go into the coat closet, reaching up onto the top shelf and grabbing one of her old socks. She reaches in and produces a small wad of cash, dropping it into Lip’s hand. “It’s not much and I was gonna use it to get a jump on the heat bill for next month, so it’s just a loan.”

Lip looks down at the money before looking at his sister. “Yeah, okay, thanks.” He stands and gives Fiona a side hug, pressing a kiss into her hair. “Seriously, uh, thank you. I’ll pay you back.” He smiles to himself as he pulls his coat on, going to the door immediately to go to the store, pausing to look back. “I asked her to be my girlfriend by the way.”

As the door closes and she goes back to making food for her other siblings, Fiona wonders to herself what this go round will mean for her brother. And prays to whatever god that will listen that it’ll be something he can make it back from.

“And um, Kev and V are thinking about trying for kids soon. So that’s cool.” Charlotte shifts in her seat, trying to get comfortable. Her father doesn’t even bother to look up from his menu, his glasses low on his nose as he scans the booklet. Her mother offers her a small smile, putting up a finger and gesturing for her to wait. 

“That’s very good honey, just give us a second while we figure out what we’re getting.” 

The young woman nods, taking a sip of her water and looking around the restaurant. She hums quietly along to the instrumentals they were playing in the background. She’d told her parents that she didn’t need to go to a fancy dinner when she got home, that she’d prefer eating something at home with them, but they’d insisted saying they ‘didn’t know what type of nutrition she’d been getting in SouthSide with Kevin and Veronica’.  

“So you got a job?” Her dad finally asks as he snaps the menu closed, lifting his hand and summoning the waiter over with his finger. Charlotte hates when he does that. “Where?”

“Um, a restaurant, it’s actually pretty fun working there, Daddy, I like it-”

“He’ll have the filet mignon medium rare with the baked potato, none of the dressings, really, he has a cholesterol issue, don’t let them drown it in butter. I’ll have the snapper with a salad, we’ll share it, Charlotte, and she’ll have tomato soup with sliced broiled chicken and again…no butter.” Her mother cuts in. 

“Um, Mom-”

Her mother’s eyebrows shoot up, her eyes fixing on her. “What? Did you not want that?”

Charlotte wilts under the downturn of her mother’s lips, biting her own and shaking her head. Before the waiter can finish writing the orders her father is collecting the menus and shoving them into his hands. Both of her parents turn to her, who is mouthing a ‘thank you’ to the retreating waiter. 

“So Veronica is pregnant? And by that boyfriend of hers? Jesus, Carol what have you been doing?” her father groans, shaking his head in disappointment.

“They got married, Daddy.”

“I don’t remember going to any weddings. Or receiving any pictures of them in a church. Or hell, a courthouse. Veronica could be doing so much better. She’s such a beautiful, smart girl, always has been. Guess she inherited my sister’s habit of giving up opportunities to chase behind men from that shithole-”

“Victor.” Her mom mumbles, putting her hand over her husband’s arm. “Please, Veronica is doing us a favor helping out Charlotte, keeping an eye on her. Besides, she’s only in her twenties. She’s still got time. Now, Lottie, baby, what else have you done? Made any friends?”

Charlotte takes another gulp of her water, squeezing her phone in her lap as she thinks about how to approach this topic. “I um, the girls at work are really nice most of the time, so we talk. And V’s friends are great, like Fiona and her siblings. She has this brother Ian who’s really great and I have fun with him-”

“Not too much fun.”

She sighs, smoothing her hand over her hair she has slicked into a bun. “No, Ian is gay, Mom. He has a boyfriend. Mickey. Who is also…nice” Sorta. 

“Good.” her mom chirps.

Taking a breath, Charlotte’s mouth opens and closes as she fights with herself internally. She missed her parents so much. She was reunited with them after being apart for the longest time, and she doesn’t want to ruin it. But she knows what they’ll say if she tells them about Lip. How they’ll act. What they might do. But then she reminds herself of the whole point of her moving to Chicago. She was supposed to be growing the fuck up, and that included telling her parents she was was in a relationship. “And I’m, now I’ve-”

“Have you found a doctor out there yet?” Her father’s question takes all of the wind out of Charlotte’s sails. She immediately deflates, looking down at the table and huffing out a breath in irritation. “Baby, it’s important. I’ll look up some names and give them to you before you go back in a couple weeks. Don’t let me forget okay?” 

“Okay, Daddy.”

“Good. Now, I wonder how long it’s gonna take for us to get some damn food.”

Charlotte hears her mother head out for the day, the front door closing and immediately dives for her phone. Her dad had gone to work early that morning and for the first time in the two and a half weeks she’s been home, she hasn’t been home alone. 

It was cute at first. Watching movies with her dad, baking sweets with her mom. Going to the mall together, church, the country club that she’d always hated because they were just barely rich enough to go and her parents always felt the need to overcompensate. It was embarrassing to say the least. And Charlotte was tired. 

But most of all, she missed her boyfriend.

So she runs up the stairs to her childhood room, closes the door and flops on the bed, dialing her new favorite number.

Lip picks up on the second ring, and a smile spreads across her face as soon as she hears the familiar, “Hi, baby.”

“Hello, boyfriend, you busy?”

“Uh…” On Lip’s end he’s balancing the phone between his cheek and his shoulder, his hands busy with hurriedly unscrewing the rims from an expensive car that someone made the arrogant choice of parking too close to the line where SouthSide begins. “No.”

“You sure? What’re you doing?”

Lip grunts as he loads the rims into Mickey’s trunk before closing it, slamming it closed and patting the back, letting him know he was good to pull off. “Just got finished stealin’ the rims off a car.”

Charlotte sits up abruptly, eyes widening. “Really? Phillip-”

“‘M kiddin’ bunny. I’m just headin’ home, how have you been?”

“Since we last talked this morning? Missed you, got my nails done with my mom, had lunch with some girls I used to cheer with, missed you some more, called.” she shrugs. 

Lip smiles at that, keys jangling in his hands as he pushes into his house, mouthing a ‘hi’ to Debbie and taking Liam from her arms. “Yeah? Your other boyfriend not keepin’ you entertained?”

“Now, if I play along, you know it’s like you pissed yourself off right?” Charlotte says. 

Liam’s head lifts at her voice and he starts trying to take the phone. “Who’s that? Who’s that, buddy? Baby, say hi to Liam.”

“Hi, Liam!” she says sweetly. “I miss you!” making kissing sounds into the phone.

“Lottie!” the little boy giggles, blowing a kiss back.

Lip places his brother in his playpen and rubs his head before walking up the steps. “Okay, enough of that, you wanna keep talkin’ to Liam, you better call his phone. Or better yet, come home.”

“I’m working on it. I talked to my Dad today about some return flights earlier this morning, so we’re making progress. Before, he wouldn’t even let me work it into conversation.” 

“Yeah, I guess that’s somethin’.” Lip sighs, closing his room door behind him and sitting on his own bed. He’s been trying to be as patient as possible, especially since he didn’t know them, but Charlotte’s parents were doing exactly what he’d thought they’d do, drag their feet on sending her back. Hell, it’s what he would do. It took every ounce of selflessness he had, which was not much, combined with the fear of what V would do if her money was wasted, for him not to purposefully make her miss her flight out there. He’d understand them never wanting her to come back. But it’d fucking suck for him. 

Charlotte hears the other side of the phone go quiet and knows Lip is worrying about the same thing she was last week. What if her parents changed their minds? What if they decided they didn’t want her moving away, regardless of whether V was checking on her or not. “Careful, Gallagher, I might think you miss me or something.”

“You’re funny.” he scoffs, staring at his ceiling. “And I do.”

“Well, how’s that photo collection working for you?”

“It’s uh, a lot more effective when my bed smelled like you, but the pictures are pretty fuckin’ hot, so, s’working pretty well.”

Charlotte feels her cheeks heat up and rolls her eyes as if he can see her. “They’re mostly candid shots of me walkin’ around your house or mine, they can’t be that hot.”

“They’re of you.” Lip says matter of factly. As if it wasn’t something to be discussed. Just a fact..

The woman shifts again, playing with the strings of her hoodie absently as she mutes the phone briefly, Lip’s quiet breathing on speaker in her room as she sorts out what she’s gonna say next. Taking the phone off of mute she takes a breath, gathering her courage. “So, does that mean you don’t need any…help?”

She sits, staring at her phone nervously as she waits for his reply. There’s a beat of silence that makes her stomach twist uncomfortably until it dissipates at the sound of Lip’s laughter filling her room.

“Are…are you trying to initiate phone sex with me?” he wheezes, cackling into the phone. Charlotte yelps, taking the phone off of speaker and putting it to her ear.

“Fuck you, not anymore!” 

Lip smirks to himself on the opposite end, trying to choke down his laughter. He wasn’t laughing at her per se. Well, actually, he was a little. But aside from that, the fact that she was nervous was what made him laugh. The irony of it all. Lip had been all but begging her for a crumb of pussy since he’d met her. Once they had gotten to that weird limbo of pretending to be just friends, she’d opened the door to making out and heavy petting, but Lip was letting her take the lead. Even now, he never wants to push, he’s always pushed, but now, he was happy with what they were doing. Well, not actually, but he was willing to wait for her. 

The fact that she’d be hesitant, or think they live in some kind of alternate universe where Lip might not want it, was hilarious. Either, she doesn’t know him very well, or his girl doesn’t know how sexy she is. Both options seem ridiculous.

“No, I’m sorry, come on, set the mood, bunny, m’ready.”

“No,” she whines, “I already don’t know how and now you’ve laughed at me. You fuckin’ do it.”

He chuckles lowly again as he pushes off of his bed to lock the door. “Well, I really miss you. I miss seeing you. Touching you. Waking up to you in the morning, being on top of you.” Lip listens for the change in Charlotte’s breathing, trying to focus on the task at hand and not let this end almost immediately because he’s envisioning what she’s going to be doing on the other end of the phone. “Take your pants off for me, bunny?”

“Already did.” she breathes. “And if you laugh, I’ll hang up.”

Lip starts undoing the buttons on his own pants, nodding as if she could see him. “Nothin’ to laugh at. Good job, baby.” A sound on the other side of the phone makes his brows go up as he spits into his hand. “Yeah? You like me tellin’ you how good you are? Gotta talk to me, sweetheart.” 

“I miss you too, how you take care of me,” Lip bites his lip and takes himself out of his boxers as she whimpers into his ear. “Kissin’ you.”

“Fuck.” Lip groans quietly, rubbing his hand along his dick, smoothing his thumb over the tip, sweeping over the precum forming there. He hears every lilt in Charlotte’s voice as he feels himself already building. He keeps trying to remind himself to talk to her, trying not to be too dirty because he doesn’t know her style yet and not just moan into the mic. He grits out praises lowly. ‘Good girl’ ‘C’mon baby’ ‘So fuckin good, so fuckin’ sexy’.

But he keeps being distracted by the sounds that she’s making, the sound of his name. He’s never been so thankful to Monica and Frank for naming him Phillip because the sound of that name rolling off of his girlfriend’s tongue could make any man nut. 

He hears her voice pitch even higher and he knows that she’s close. That delicious pressure is building in his lower stomach and sinks his teeth into his lower lip. “K-keep talkin’ baby, a little more, let me hear you bunny. You takin’ care of yourself over there”

“Yes, fuck Phillip, m’gonna cum.”

Shit does he want that. He’s never wanted anything more. But then that goddamn number starts floating around in his head. 772 goddamned fucking miles. Fucking two weeks. No, don’t think about this now. Focus. He begs his own mind not to piss him off. Sweat slides down his temple as he tightens his grip on himself and lets her whimpers ring in his ears. Lip groans, pleading with himself not to miss this opportunity. Something is fucking missing. This isn’t fuckin’ enough. I need…I fucking-

Lip puts his phone on speaker, Charlotte’s cries fill the room and he literally edges himself as his fingers fumble with his phone in his free hand. Blue eyes light up as they find what they’re looking for. “Okay, come on baby, cum with me.” he grunts.

Lip’s abs clench as he comes into his hand, trying to contain the mess as much as possible and muffle his moans so his siblings can’t hear what he’s doing. He settles into a groan of Charlotte’s name, biting back following it with three words that have been rattling around in his brain for a while now. He tries to commit the sounds Charlotte is making to memory, feeling pride in his chest at knowing he caused it, and a paired feeling of emptiness knowing he couldn’t pull her to him now that they’re done. 

Sitting up, he reaches on the ground, grabbing a discarded t-shirt, wiping his hands off on it and putting it back on the floor. 

“Phillip?” a small voice calls out. His attention is brought back to his phone, briefly smiling at the picture he’d left open on it before frowning again as he hears something strange in Charlotte’s voice. “Are you still here?”

“Yeah, m’still here, bunny.” The weakness of her voice forces a softness into his own. 

“Can we talk a little now?”

“Yeah, yeah, I can talk to you.” Lips says, furrowing his brows at the sound of Charlotte’s voice. There’s a meekness that makes his stomach drop as he scoots up on his bed, suddenly feeling the need to both cover himself and rob someone for the little bit of money to buy a ticket to fuck ass Virginia. “You okay, baby?”

A shaky breath is released on the other line and there is silence for a moment, the blond pulls the phone from his ear to check to see if the call disconnected, hurriedly placing it back when he hears her again. “M’fine. I…um, like that you call me that. I like bunny too.”

Lip releases his own breath as he hears her voice become a little more normal, letting himself smile again as he lights a joint. “I know you do.” 

“So fucking full of yourself.” she giggles, the sound making Lip feel like the sun shining directly into his room. 

“Aye, watch your mouth. You must have some bad influences out there, what happened to my sweetheart?” he says, trying to light the blunt quietly.

“You curse every other word.” she hums. “But, I was thinking.”

“Interesting.”

“Phillip.” 

“Okay, sorry, Charlotte, go.” He snickers, reaching for his ashtray on his nightstand, flicking ash and relighting the blunt. Lip grunts, pushing off of the bed, unlocking the door and peaking out to listen to hear if Liam was crying, satisfied to close it again when he isn’t.

“You need a nickname,” Charlotte says, the sound of her rustling around in her own bed making its way through the phone. “I’ve got like five. Baby, sweetheart, bunny, sweet thing, and the mean one-”

“Woah, what do I call you that’s mean?” 

“Um, brat?” she snarks.

Lip rolls his blue eyes, settling back on his bed, unable to contain the smile on his face. “That’s not one of your nicknames, that’s more like an uh, assessment of your behavior.” 

“Regardless! I wanna give you a nickname. How about Lippy?”

His lips curl in disgust, the actual shock at the name making him cough on the smoke, breathing it out through his nose. “Yeah, I will not fuckin’ answer to that.” 

She laughs again mumbling a, ‘yes you would’  and Lip is irritated by the fact that despite fucking hating it, he would answer to whatever she called him as long as she kept calling. “Pookie? Pooh Bear?”

“Am I Liam?”

“Bubba, or bubs, or bub! For short!”

“What happened to boyfriend, huh? You liked that?” he groans.

“Boyfriend isn’t going away.” Charlotte says, and Lip can basically picture the smug smile on her face she always makes when she’s about to get her way. “He’s just gonna be joined by bubba.” 

The blond is humiliated by what he’s become. Cringing to himself he prays to any god that will listen that Ian and Mickey never manage to hear Charlotte chirp out his newfound pet name and mourns the version of himself that would never let a girl call him anything but Lip. “Bubba, that’s what you like?”

“And babe. Mostly bubba and boyfriend. What’d you think I was gonna call you? Daddy?” she says in a playful seductive voice. Unaware that on the other side of the line her boyfriend was adjusting himself.

“Not unless you’re down to go again.”

“Hmm, unfortunately my mom should be home soon.” Charlotte sighs. Lip immediately feels that ache in his chest again, never really thinking about the lows of her hanging up that come with the highs of their phone calls. “I miss you, bubba.”

He nods as if she can see him, mouth opening and closing, he wills down the want to beg her to stay on the phone. “Miss you too, princess. You forgot one.”

“That one’s Mickey’s.” she laughs.

“Nah,” Lip says softly into the phone. “They’re all mine.” 

The couple reluctantly hangs up and Lip’s head is racing. Full of thoughts of Charlotte, distance and new territory. He’s never been here before. He doesn’t know how to navigate being the type of boyfriend Charlotte deserves. He doesn’t think he’s ever been a boyfriend before, and now he was going to have to be a long distance one?  He couldn’t do this. He needed her to come home. Charlotte needs to come home.

He’s shaken from his thoughts by the sound of his phone vibrating again. And because he’s fuckin’ whipped now, a smile immediately spreads across his face as he grabs it without looking, happy that Charlotte missed him enough to call back so fast. “Missed me already, bunny?”

“Oh..um, is this a bad time, Phillip?” 

Lip pauses, unable to register what’s happening as he holds the phone against his ear as the only other woman he’s ever let call him Phillip waits for him to say something. Anything. 

“Phillip?”

“Helene?”

[razrogue]

Because they are on my mind this morning...

I truly believe Briva and Zevran saved each other. Briva had no qualms about dying after rescuing her cousin and neighbors. She was ready to go down fighting right there in the alienage cause fuck shems thinking they can do whatever they want. Duncan saved her then but that feeling of fuck it, it's whatever never went away. After finding out about the ritual's effects and what it meant for her life, her attitude was just whatever, it is what it is. If she was meant to die then she would. It made her dangerous but reckless and Alistair and Sten were the only ones willing to tell her (in their own ways...well Sten was straightforward but still) you need to chill out a little bit. "I'm ready to die" was always in the back of her mind whenever they got into a fight. It was always the last one to her.

And then there was Zevran...

The assassin who failed miserably at his task thanks to the dangerously reckless elf standing over him as he came to, hoping he'd died himself. He pledged himself to her cause despite his own internal death wish. And despite everyone's protests, as Briva stood over him that day, she reached her hand out and said come with me.

Then one night after dinner, sitting near each other by the fire, Zevran asked her if she wanted to have a little fun and Briva said sure. And they continued fighting and continued having fun, until one day Briva decided to ask him sincerely to hang out together. Never mind that they'd seen every inch of each other and did things with each other that some didn't until at least 3 dinners and a drink together. It was the first time that both of them were just honest with each other. And so that night the two of them just talked. They talked honestly and openly and without judgment and they talked so long that the sun began rising and the camp began stirring. That night was the turning point for them. Not all the wonderfully delicious sex they'd had but the night the two of them let their guards down fully and really exposed themselves to each other. It was uncharted territory for both of them but they embraced it and walked on together.

From then on, they watched out for each other a little more. A throwing knife into a dark spawn who was getting a little too close. Sand thrown in the eyes of a bandit swinging in the other's vicinity. It was a bit of a dance for the two of them as they watched over each other while cutting down foes. They'd developed not only a harmony but a friendship then a relationship that was new for them both but a journey they'd decided on together.

And so the night before the archdemon's army reached Denerim, they laid together in silence, wrapped in each other's arms. Neither knowing what to say exactly but wanting to cherish the moment like it was the last. As Zevran slept soundly beside her, Briva thought to herself that she wasn't ready to die anymore. She wanted another day, another night, and to have many more with him at her side, in her bed, and in her heart. And she promised to him as he slept, "I will come back to you." With a renewed purpose, she was determined to not allow this battle to make a liar out of her.

[sweetmuffynsblog]

What?!

Warning: English is not my first language so please bear with me💀 oh and also, Daemon is cool, My boy Laenor is amazing and Crispin is an asshole! Oh, and Targaryen Incest, but what's new?

This morning in the Red Keep was very different than any other morning, You, The first Princess, who was born three year before your sister Rhaenyra sit and look at every maids who ran like there's no tomorrow.

Today is your sister's wedding day, your father, much to Rhaenyra's dismay decided to wed her with Laenor Velaryon, your other cousin, now, in another lifetime, it's a good match, for you know Laenor is a very good young man, with a good attitue, good heart and handsome, oh and he is also a dragonrider and a talented knight, but the thing is, he doesn't find women particularly up to his taste... Or, in another words, he doesn't like women, not at all. You knew it long time ago when you caught him and his guard, Ser Joffrey Lonmouth kissing in the hills, and Laenor made you swore to never tell any single soul and he promised to always bring you the finest jewellery and silk everytime his father's ship, the Sea Snake go to the free cities, everyone thought it was the act of courtship, even his father encourages it, but much to many people's displeasure, he will be marrying your sister, you wanted him to marry you, Laenor is a good man, you don't mind his tastes, because he knows he will not mind yours, marrying Laenor will probably the best decisions you will have in your lifetime, simply because you know he will supports you no matter what, but alas, he is now engaged and to be married to your own sister.

You are always be the one who notices everything, much to your pleasure and other people's dismay, you have information that you got from your spies around the King's Landing, you can see everything and everywhere. That's why you knew that your uncle, Daemon Targaryen, didn't defiled your younger sister at all, he ran like a coward after introduced her to a pleasure, and Rhaenyra slept with Ser Criston 'Crispin' Cole instead. You wanted to help your sister, and told your father but Otto Hightower, the Ex-Hand of The King beat you into it, and he angered your father which resulted his firing, you like it, because you hate that son of a bitch.

"Your Grace, it's the time." Your maid, Alina comes, you nod give her smile which she returned, "which dress you want to use, Your Grace?"

"i want the Red and Black dress." she picks up the black red with blood red cloak, it's a colour of your house, you are proud of it, and always wearing it everytime you got a chance, especially in this special occasion.

After that you go to the great hall, where everyone sit and the music can be hear. You are fashionably late for dramatic purpose, you are a Targaryen, dramatic is in your blood.

The guards outsite bow, you nod your head then straighten your posture,

"PRESENTING, PRINCESS Y/N TARGARYEN, PRINCESS OF DRAGONSTONE AND HEIR TO THE IRON THRONE!"

You can hear every movement and music stops, when you walk inside, everyome stand up and men bowed their heads, women curtsying, you only give people your small smile, before come closer and curtsying to your father, you noticed the additional guest in the royal table, Daemon Targaryen.

Now, you never hate your uncle at all, you find him quite amusing, especially with his childish antics, and stubborn stature. He stand up and you smile at him which he returns with nod, you know he likes you enough to considered you a family member, beside, you know his fonds for your sister. You sit in your chair, and the music continue, you frown when you can not find your father's wife there, it's not usual for her to be late in the special occasion like this.

"how are you, dear niece?" your uncle asks, your shoot him a look and taking sip of your wine,

"i'm always good, uncle, how about you? I didn't receive any information about your return?"

"i come here, want to celebrate my niece's wedding and share my brother's joy, of course, it's a surprise."

You roll your eyes, everyone knows about your uncle's antics, that's why they get used to it, and find it not surprising anymore when he walked into the great hall as if nothing happened, as if your father didn't exiled him at all as a punishment.

"Congratulations, Rhaenyra, Laenor, i wish both of you joy."

You raise your cup to them and taking sip of your wine, you see every food and take a bite of your lemon cakes. Before you hear the music stops once again and everyone look at the door, there stand Alicent, your father's new wife, in a dark green dress, you frowned at her, especially when you recall that when Hightowers wanted to call their bannermen to a war, they will light the green fire to let them know, who this bitch wants to light a war for?! Seeds of doubts in your mind, you know Alicent is a bad news when she agreed to marry your father, and now, she wants a war? With whom? Does she want to challenged your claim by making her son the new heir? You scoffed, if that so then you will make sure to cut Hightower's influence, there's no way you will let anyone challenged your claim to the Throne. Everyone stand, while you and Daemon still sitting, you look at Alicent, there's no way you can give her the satisfaction of having your respect, she's not worth it.

She comes and kiss your father's cheeks before sitting down, you feel Daemon smirks at you when you simply rolling your eyes, by sunsets tomorrow you will make sure that the Hightower will lose their power, you will not let any assholes challenged your claim, the Iron Throne is yours, you will be the first Queen Regnant of the Seven Kingdoms.

The feast continue, and it's time for Rhaenyra and Laenor to dance, both of them dancing while you hear your uncle scoffes in his seat,

"why? Jealous?" you ask, giving him your smug smile, Daemon only frowned at you, "well, if you aren't so stupid then the position of Rhaenyra's husband will be yours. And i will be happier because i can marry Laenor."

"are you jealous of your sister, dear niece?" he sarcastically asks, "and you do realise right that Lord Velaryon's taste is differ from other men?"

"of course, i do, my uncle. But i know i will be happy if i am the one who marrying him!"

Both of you whispered at each other, for others, they may see how close you two, only both of you know the reality. Your uncle fonds of Your sister while you, despite being The Heir, never have anyone to find you interesting, maybe because your personality. You are not a naive Rhaenyra, you are trained to be the Queen by your great-grandmother, Queen Alyssane herself, and even The late Dowager Queen Rhaena, your badass great-grandaunt was fond of you, teaching you everything you should know to play Game Of Thrones. So you are so different with Rhaenyra. Rhaenyra is a Realm's delight while you, the Realm's Future. Your presence alone demand respect, even since a young age, that's why no one can get close to you no matter what, only Velaryon family, Laenor and his companion, ser Joffrey, that you find descent enough to be close with.

You sip your wine when you see Daemon gets closer to Rhaenyra and both of them almost kissing, really, infront of your salad, it seems that everyone don't see it. You speak with Laena and Rhaenys, and also with Corlys, sharing secret smile with Larys Strong, the new Hand, you know that man is very poisonous, he is ten times worse than Otto but you like him, you even provided him with the information he needed for exchange of loyalty towards you alone, you know that killing him will be easy, you have contact with Faceless Men since you didn't even start your moonblood.

And without noticing, an assasin comes and the hell broke out. Everyone panicking, you feel someone hold your hips and before you even registered it, the person throw you into their shoulders as if you are a sack of potato,

"fuck!" you scream, "put me down! What the hell do you think you do?!"

"shut up, Princess!" you can hear your uncle's voice, it seems that your uncle is the one who throws you into his shoulder like a sack of potato,

"uncle Daemon, let me go!" you screamed, you look up and see Ser Criston kills Ser Joffrey, "Oh My Gods! Laenor! Ser Joffrey!" you scream, resisted when your uncle brings you out from the hall, tears streaming down your face, you are sobbing, Ser Joffrey is dead, Laenor must've be very sad right now, you want to go inside and hug your best friend. Before you even walk, a hand grips your shoulder,

"stay here, Y/N, you can't go inside, it's not safe!"

"Criston killed Ser Joffrey! Laenor probably so sad right now i want to accompany him, uncle Daemon." you are crying mess right now, you are the one who support Laenor and Joffrey's relationship, you are the one who didn't frown at them or throwing them judgement look, your heart is clenched so hard that you cannot find yourself can properly breathing.

"sshh..." Daemon hugs you, it's the first time you are being hugged by a person other than your mother and Laenor or Rhaenyra, you resisted him but he grips you with so much force that you cannot resisted anymore. "breath with me, sweetheart, breath..." you can hear his heart, the rythym calm you down a little by little, before you even know it, you hug him back.

***

In the morning, when you wake up and go to the hall to have your breakfast, you see everyone giving you a weird look, you cannot even fanthom why. You walk with grace, you already ordered your faceless men to do your work... By it you mean killed a lot of people last night, now you only wait for the result.

You see Laenor sits quietly in the garden, overlooking something, you come close to him and you feel your heart clenched, "Laenor..." you whisper, he seems to hear you, you see his sight and it brokes your heart, you sit by his side and draw him into the hug, "i'm sorry..." you can feel him sobbing, his tears soaking your dress but you cannot find yourself to be angry at it, his entire body shaking.

After it feels like hours, he lets go of your body and wiped his tears using the cloth, you see his bloodshoot red eyes, "i am sorry for making your dress mess."

"you are my bestfriend and so does him, i am sorry, Laenor..."

"it's ok, it's not your fault." he says, sad smile in his face, "i want to congratulate you, actually."

You frown, "what do you mean?"

"you don't know? The King, Your Father decrees your marriage to your uncle, Daemon this morning! By now everyone in the court already know it."

The colour drained off your face so fast, your mind go blank, "what?!"

"one of your father's courtier saw you in a rather compromising position with your uncle last night and a maid saw your uncle out of your bedchamber last night too..." Laenor looks at you, noticing your quietness and your pale face, "don't say that you didn't know?!"

"Fuck!"

***

You want to stab someone so badly, especially a certain blonde haired man, the rider of Caraxes to be exact. You find him in a Dragonpit, his hands in Caraxes's snout, give him an attention he deserves. You come closer to him, and Caraxes lets out a whine that makes your mood better, you caress him, you look at your uncle,

"what in the seven hells, uncle!" you said slowly, your voice is low but dangerous, "you cannot having my fucking sister now you want to ruined my life?!"

You can hear another growl from a very familiar dragon, your own dragon seems restless while sensing your anger, Daemon looks at you,

"that's not i mean..."

"that's what exactly your meaning, you bastard!"

"that's not what i mean." you distance yourself from Caraxes and from his owner, you shake your head, and walk a step behind when Daemon comes closer,

"yes, that's what you mean! You cannot have my sister now for she is married and now you want to settle for me? I don't want to become your second choice, Daemon! I don't want it!"

Daemon comes closer to you, want to holds your hand but you flinched away making him stop,

"Y/N I-"

"You are being mean!" tears streaming down your face, "everyone have love Rhaenyra my whole life! I was never the first choice of everyone, everyone sees me as the heir, they love Rhaenyra as a human! I've always been second to her my whole life, Daemon and i won't be the person you settle for just because you can't have her!"

With that you walk away, away from him and his trapped and well planned shit. You should've known better, there's no way he's helping you because he wants your safety, no, he wants the fucking Iron Throne, and you will be a tools for him to achieve it. He will never loves you, your marriage is doomed. He loves your sister. He always will.

I feel like i should do the second part? Yes or no?

[jillianfahey]

Bad Batch Crosshair - Modern AU (Family is Annoying in any Universe)

A short look into the reception for Crosshair and Lyni's marriage.

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Crosshair felt joy in his chest waking up next to Lyni. So much so that he dreaded his next deployment because it meant he had to take a break from being next to her. But Riyo promised that by his next leave the adoption papers for the twins Brutal and Shadow would be though then he could take all three to get military IDs.

And after the adoption goes through we'll take a vacation just the four of us, he promised himself. It was a promise that was keeping him from murdering many of his family members at this reception. They were testing his patience with the entirety of the Fett clan turning out to meet who one of their party boys was settling down with.

Looking around he could see his brothers talking to their cousins Cody and Rex, with a few of their brothers standing close by. Wolffe with his eye patch was giving stern stares at anyone who was headed his way so most steered clear of him. Shadow and Brutal were playing with some of the younger members of the clan, and Lyni was keeping a watchful eye on them.

Soon Jango started walking over, and Crosshair could feel the anger build up in him at the sight of the man. Most of his brothers had a strained relationship with their father, who was rightly called a dead beat. Jango had done little to raise them, preferring to leave them with the women that he slept with only to turn up later with gifts to try and mend the rift. One of the reasons Crosshair had slept around so much was because he was tired of fighting the expectation with Jango Fett as his father.

Lyni's slender hand slipped into his and Cross felt his anger melt away with her touch. Turning he smiled at his Riddur, his wife, and tried to ignore the man coming towards them. Jango had not gotten the hint, "Crosshair, why didn't you tell me you had such a lovely Cyre?"

Because my sweetheart is none of your business he wanted to say but didn't. Instead stating, "You have never been interested before."

Lyni squeezed his hand with her left as she extended her right, "It is nice to meet you Mr Fett, I'm Lyni."

Smiling the flirtatious smile he turned on all of his children's partners Jango answered taking her hand to shake, "What a lovely name for a lovely lady."

Raising an eyebrow, "A compliment that will never be returned to you sir." Crosshair snorted at the look on his fathers face but Lyni gave her practiced smile, "Now if you excuse us I have other members of the family to meet." Giving him a short nod she and Crosshair walked away and continued meeting members of the family.

There was Alpha and his generation, Colt and the rest of the uncles, Cody and the rest of the older cousins and then Tup and the rest of the younger cousins. Not to mention the spouses and partners of many of the older ones. Colt wife Shaak Ti stepped forward and took Lynis hands into hers, "Do not worry young one." With one of the tougura woman's gentle smiles, "Everyone will fall in place given time." Lyni just nodded and followed Cross some more.

Finally they had mad the rounds and settled at a picnic table for some lunch. Lyni relaxed a bit when Shadow and Brutal joined them with Wrecker following. He had also been playing with the kids but stopped when the twins wanted to rest. At this table for a moment they were just the Bad Batch and the Dathmarian trio. Lyni leaned her head on Crosshair's shoulder and sighed, "Is it always like this?" Her hand motioned to the chaos of the family unfolding around them.

Crosshair wrapped an arm around her shoulders while Hunter patted her shoulder comfortingly, "Only on a full get together. Otherwise there are less people." Lyni nodded once but sat up with with her practiced smile on her face when others joined the table.

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I'm sorry if it did not have as much interactions with the clones as wanted and/or expected. I am just trying to stay writing on a regular basis and this is what came out.