#i missed doodling silly girls i should do that more

[icecity78]

[jenctrl]

love is not a walk in the park*ೃ༄

"when something that should be a walk in the park feels like a maze for the feline and canine–at least it's beautiful, serene, and sunny!"

warning; from the blackcat!Y/n series, the parts don't need to be read in order!

a/n: reuploaded from old to new account

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

It was the gentle breeze that pushed the clouds to move, the way there was a faint buzz of bees in the distance, the scent of green grass and soil and the presence of two suns that brought Y/n a serene feeling within her. 

It was as if she was alone, but not lonely because, despite their different nature, Yunjin brought her something she had been missing.

That feeling of inadequacy became faint. 

The words in her book didn’t hold a deeper meaning than her being able to live one life and during that one life being able to feel warmth on her skin despite sitting in the shadow of the tree. 

This was the most normal her life had ever felt which was ironic considering people would disagree because she was an idol. It was though, because she hadn’t been able to live her life more freely than now even with certain restrictions that came with fame and the need to keep a neat image. 

Yunjin basked in the sun where half of the blanket was–the other in the shadow where Y/n sat–these moments were the most peaceful ones she had. In a hectic life, as a person who indulged in the hectic with her energetic personality, Yunjin appreciated that she had Y/n to balance that out for her. 

The scent of cinnamon and benzoin was one she associated with serenity; Y/n’s scent reminded her of how she could wind down at times. 

There was a certain flow to the way her pen moved along the pages of the notebook as she scribbled down lyrics. Those songs she would brush off as silly, knowing she would never release them, that were, at times, about the feline her eyes would glance at now and then. 

What exactly were they about? Yunjin couldn’t figure that out, she couldn’t pinpoint what it was that she described when writing about someone she could write books about. It left her lost, but she kept chasing after the only thing her mind could think of; Y/n.

She wanted to state that she knew Y/n the best which still wasn’t as deeply as some would think that it was. However, Yunjin unlike others was able to figure out Y/n’s disguise; the girl always told one-fourth of a whole story and while the rest took it for the complete version the girl knew that there was more. 

Pretty eyes worn as a disguise. 

She looked up from the notebook and at Y/n who was leaning her back against Yunjin’s side for leverage. 

What exactly was it that she felt for her? So much, too much to simply put it into words, but it surely did make it easier to get words out on paper.

The feline was the perfect muse; Yunjin’s muse.

However, Y/n remained a mystery Yunjin loved being around. 

“What if we made a song together?” 

She casually put it out there, not thinking much of it as she mindlessly doodled on the page, underlining certain words. 

It wouldn’t only get them closer as she would get to spend more time with Y/n, but the girl beside her was amazing with her words. Yunjin would be able to learn; Y/n was highly lyrical and expressed herself in artistic ways Yunjin had yet to grasp. 

“What?” 

Y/n put the bookmark between the pages before she closed the book, her eyes didn’t leave the cover though. Nerves and uneasiness washed over her at the suggestion, her fingers traced along the outlines of the book in her hands, not being able to comprehend why Yunjin would want to write a song with her. Scared that she would get exposed for the fraud she felt like she was in a place she was supposed to fit into, but never felt like she did. 

“I mean we don’t have to release it, but just work on something together like a side project for fun.”

Yunjin shrugged and shifted in her place to turn to Y/n who sat up straight. 

“Why would you want to do that?”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

That wasn’t the problem that Y/n saw with it, there were many.

“I mean as in; why with me when there are better options?”

The problem was that the girl felt like she was the least sought-after option and Yunjin would acknowledge her for the con that she was. Y/n was sure that she lacked, especially among all these other talented people. She stood out like a sore thumb and for all the wrong reasons; the feline did her best to stay hidden. She didn’t fit in a crowd of people who were talented when there were so many things she could do and have done so much better. 

She had achieved such high things in life, but was that enough? Was she enough? No way. All that she had done, Y/n could have done better, couldn’t she?

“Are you kidding?”

No, Y/n wasn’t kidding and she wasn’t going to entertain it either as she rolled her eyes and looked back down at her book, opening it again. Yunjin knew just how to make everything melt in the end and Y/n didn’t like that; no, it wasn’t that she didn’t like that; she just didn’t understand how Yunjin always managed to do it.

She was so confused about what it was that drew her to Yunjin. She just knew that it was a want; a need. Y/n wasn’t fond of that, especially as someone who had always been independent; she did not want to possibly become even slightly dependent on someone. She could simply ignore her emotions like she always did by occupying herself and pretending that she didn’t need Yunjin when it came to certain things. 

Yunjin smiled, putting down her pen as she huffed and moved to lie down on her back. Her smile didn’t disappear as she loved seeing the feline, who puffed up her fur at moments like these, melt into a puddle just for her. She loved not only the puddle Y/n could be, but she also loved her for the pompous behaviour and the person she was.

Was that it?

Despite her eyes being glued to the words she wasn’t able to read them and she let Yunjin put her head in her lap. Y/n was doing her best to try and ignore her canine, but it was hard to ignore the sun when it was beaming right at her. 

“Y/n, you’re the most competent person I know when it comes to music, especially when it comes to writing lyrics.”

The book got gently moved out of the way, Yunjin being able to see more than the cover as she looked over Y/n’s face and now met her eyes. She was aware that Y/n appreciated compliments, she could see how they worked as reassurance to her feline who she knew was insecure on the inside despite the confident and cold facade. 

Yunjin was always there for the girl; she was a loyal life-long companion for her feline. 

Still, words alone wouldn’t melt away a facade like hers, but Yunjin managed to do it with more than just words. She did it by simply being herself and it left Y/n confused; lost in something that sounded like an easy walk in the park but was like a maze with continuous dead ends. 

“How would you know?”

Comically Yunjin pushed the book back, blocking their sight of each other as she looked off into the distance of the park. 

The green grass gently blew with the wind, the sun beamed strongly and warmed her skin, and the whistle together with the rattling of the branches and leaves above them filled the momentary silence.

However, Y/n put it down onto the blanket they were on and looked at Yunjin with raised eyebrows. As far as Y/n knew she hadn’t shared any of the lyrics she had written and had yet to agree to help with the lyrics for their group's songs. The fear of being caught was too immense.

“I might’ve stumbled upon some papers–” “Yunjin.” Y/n groaned and Yunjin cowered, ducking her head at the bookmark that she was smacked in the head with. 

“To be fair, you gave me your book to read and it just fell out.” She defended with a squeak, peeking up at Y/n with her lower lip now jutted out. 

Y/n heaved a sigh and reclined, lying down on the blanket–Yunjin’s head still resting on her lap–and she stared at the tree above them. The green leaves swayed with the light wind and the sky peeked through the cracks of the branches. She closed her eyes when the sun managed to seep through the cracks and held them closed for a while as her mind started to work a shift.

At the silence Yunjin moved, sitting up and turning to look at Y/n. There was something overly serene about the feline when she looked at her. The bright ray of sun splayed across her face and her dark hair glimmered in the light as she lay with her eyes closed. 

Was it the sun? Yunjin could feel her face heat up at the ethereal view of her feline so comfortable in the open field.

She pulled her knees up to her chest, hugging and resting her chin on them while staring at Y/n. The canine knew she could spend a whole day just looking at the cat-like girl in front of her. 

Her head tilted slightly to the side, “Y/n…” Yunjin carefully started and got a hum in return, watching the hues of the sun reflect on Y/n’s skin. “You’re not mad that I did, are you?” She warily asked because the last thing in the world that she wanted was to make Y/n upset with her. It wasn’t difficult to get Y/n annoyed–Yunjin was aware–but it was difficult to get her upset and angry.

It was extremely rare to see Y/n angry. Matter of fact over the past few years she’s only seen her angry once.

That was enough not to want to see more.

Yunjin held her breath when Y/n blinked her eyes open, squinting slightly at the bright light and her eyes glimmered like water did in the sun. Water Yunjin wanted to dive right into and swim in for an eternity. 

She stared at the girl who looked like a puppy that had been kicked to the curb. It was simply impossible to get upset with Yunjin. It made Y/n purse her lips for a second, the only person she was upset with was herself for being like ice cream in the sun when it came to her companion. 

Y/n exhaled, trying to cool off, but it was impossible when Yunjin’s big doe-like eyes stared at her like the sun. “No, I’m not.” The girl annoyedly admitted and the latter visibly perked up at the words, excitement evident because knowing that her feline wasn’t upset with her brightened her whole world which was filled with butterflies she loved to chase for the feeling. 

“Okay, and I’m sorry…It just happened to fall out and I didn’t know what it was at first so I read it thinking those were notes for the book.”

“I know you wouldn’t read if you knew, it’sfine.” 

Yunjin nodded as she manoeuvred around and lay on her stomach beside Y/n, resting her chin in her palm. Their eyes met as they stared at each other in yet another silence. It felt like a contest when in reality it was simply because neither of them wanted to look away. There wasn’t anything better to stare at in the end.

“Will you make a song with me then?” She at last repeated her question, but in a much smaller voice as if to not startle the girl.

Y/n broke their eye contact, but only to reach into her bag. Yunjin watched as Y/n blindly rummaged through it before she took out what she was looking for.

“Here, let’s look for some inspiration.” Yunjin happily grabbed one airpod and plopped down onto her back beside Y/n who opened her phone. 

“Do you have–” Y/n didn’t get to finish her sentence as Yunjin spoke up, “genuine love, like when you know that you’ve genuinely fallen in love because you are confused about why you fell in love in the first place.” 

The feline lolled her head to the side, coming face to face with Yunjin whose wide eyes gazed at her, a pink tint resting on the canine’s cheeks.

“You’re awfully cliché at times, you know?”

“Love is a cliché we can’t escape though, isn’t it?” 

“Unfortunately.” Y/n agreed and moved closer to the girl, resting her head on Yunjin’s shoulder so they could both look at her phone and be closer. 

The two didn’t need much inspiration though when they had each other.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

What would Miss Raven's dream be like in chapter 7, what would be the catalyst that would make her cower, if he were in Jade's dream, what would her version be like (I imagine Jade would see Drem!Raven as a silly and passionate girl who believes everything what he says) and how would she react to all this?

I’ve written about what Miss Raven would be dreaming about in book 7 ^^ (It can be read here!) I also wrote about how she might be woken up (here!).

To summarize (and add a little more to what I wrote before), Miss Raven would be curse-free and living in a real life fairy tale/Disney musical 😂 She’d be a common village girl that gets the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to go to the ball ✨

I think she’d be rattled a little when she’s reminded that she still has unfinished business… Miss Raven hates to leave a task undone, or a story unwritten. There’s still too many possibilities unexplored! You could tell her about how this world, despite looking perfect, is actually rigid and doesn’t allow for any liberties to be taken. There’s a bunch of predetermined plot points and no sense of real progression, and she’s a puppet being strung along on strings. There’s no freedom to be found in that, it’s just another cage.

But she’s not fully awake yet…! The darkness is trying to lure her away. She needs one last big push! So what should we do? GIVE HER A DOSE OF REALITY :)) The thing is, a lot of the constructs of her dream pull from her fantasies and daydreams, but it also pulls from her naive expectations of living among the humans would be like (aaaaaall the way back from when she was still an ordinary bird). Then she took on the form of a girl and came to NRC… and, uh… those dreams of hers got shattered real quick. She learned about all the imperfect aspects of humans—and though it’s not what she envisioned, she’s fascinated by it all the same. So… The dream team has to remind Miss Raven about how terrible everyone and everything can be!! It’s the only way to wake her! (Maybe have Jade go in masquerading as a “prince” and then he intentionally acts like an asshole to mess with her fantasy www)

Speaking of J word!! I joked to some irls that she would just be a doe-eyed raven’s head on a human girl’s body. And, well…

… Yeah, that checks out 😂 (Credit for the doodle goes to @anbaisai!)

“Ah, yes, Miss Raven… Poor, small, helpless, pathetic, eager-to-please Miss Raven, so wide-eyes and trusting, fufufu.” — Jade To quote a friend, “He’d put her in a small birdcage and shake her around until she cries.”

It would be funny if dream!Raven spoke entirely in screeches and caws and only Jade can understand her. Then he keeps mistranslating what she’s saying to everyone else and they just… believe him. Like dream!Azul and dream!Floyd, dream!Raven would be very cowardly, prone to tears, and reliant on Jade. She’d follow him around like a baby chick that imprinted on the first thing it saw after hatching.

[averagetmntfan]

MASTERPOST!

(yeah I copy pasted it from the other acc, don’t sue me)

wassup! Finally, a master post! Am I right?

(TC*ST AND PROSH*PPERS DNI!!)

hi there! I’m Jayah! You can call me jj tho. I’m js here to post a bunch of fun art and maybe some animation stuff? And occasionally, fan fiction >:). I am GenderFluid, and I go by all pronouns. And my sexuality is lesbian!

and my lil gay ass miiiiiiight be possibly maybe simping for someone rn..?? (*cough* a literally drawing)

I also have 12 roleplay blogs! @leontheluxuriousone , @wrecking-it-raphie @gayass-blueberry-mugman, @bendy-the-dancing-doofus, @koi-the-cosplay-boy, @improv-master-mikey , @ask-miss-maple-leaf ,@blue-masked-simp , @mikey-the-magnificent , @no-ditches-no-bitches , @candy-for-the-win and @ask-olive-huchers

PLUS: @ask-adi-huchers @candy-for-the-win @neon-of-the-leon (new ROTTMNT leo acc) @ask-miss-maple-leaf @ask-christopher-harrison

my current hyper fixations are: rottmnt, tadc, TBT(trolls: band together/trolls 3), The great north, bobs burgers, the cuphead show, moon girl and devil dinosaur, amphibia, the owl house, tmnt 12, cuphead and mugman in General, KREW, poppy playtime, and a SHIT TON MORE-

btw I swear quite a lot on this, so if that isn’t ur thing, u should click off.

and here’s my sona ref!

DISCLAIMER: please don’t send me werid asks, or gross inappropriate content. I’m a minor.

100 DTIYS!

• FANART!!: •

Leo goober(@ghosty-0w0)

PRINCESS KOI FR (@mikey-rottmnt)

MY BABIES- (@allyheart707)

MY SONS<333 (@mikey-rottmnt)

YOU MADE ME LOOK SO PRETTY RAAHHH (@mikey-rottmnt)

• ROTTMNT FICS!!!: •

The sand.

shopping day! (discontinued)

1 2 3

The 4 servants Au:

Chapter 1 (ongoing)

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4 pt.5 Pt.6 Pt.7 pt.8 pt.9 pt.10 pt.11 pt.12 (currently on hiatus)

The 4 turtles work peacefully at a competing hotel with the battle nexus, with their beloved father. But one day, everything spirals out of control! And their worlds get flipped upside down! Follow Leo, Donnie, Raph & Mikey on the journey of a life time! And who knows, they might meet some friends along the way, or maybe more…

• DOODLES: •

Pissed off peeps >:[

brace face!!

• FICS: •

Colour theory thingy sorta??

• RANDOM STUFF: •

Leo being a dumb-dumb

• ANSWERED ASKS: •

what do the bros do outside of the hotel??

Mikey needs a hug

does raph break stuff often?

Do the bros like Lou Jitsu movies?

How do they feel about working there?

Time beats a dead man

(Collab au w/ @mikey-rottmnt!!)

Pt.1

A silly cuphead and mugman au Abt uh..a lot of stuff. (Heavily inspired by babtqftim)

• FICS/ INCORRECT QUOTES: •

picky eater

get served! ..or, maybe later..

portals gone wrong!! 1 2 3

Secret admirer<3

…?

the struggles of school

Is it salad?

THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!

• HC’S that are canon in this silly au: •

Mugs

Cups and mugs (cups are not Canon)

How to hug the gang!!

• DRAWINGS: •

Human mugs doodles

chip and Dale!!

Koi and mugs being gay

KOI CANON IN TCHS?!

Rock paper scissors

• some lore: •

mugs lore

Hs! Mugs and euro…

Mug and cup lore

Main crews fav ice cream!!

cup lore (belongs to Ari)

Favourite drinks!

Pipsqueak!

(Coming soon..?)

“Small turtle, and even bigger problems.”

[enkvyu]

genshin boys and the downfall of your relationship ☆

𓆏 › childe

from the beginning, you were wooed by his playfulness, the sneaky kiss in public, the sly hand slipping under your shirt when you're talking, the late-night conversations that span until the sun rose the next morning

you believed this was it; this was what sweet first loves felt like, always giddy and living spontaneously. a dashing smile thrown in your direction, silly gifts on your doorstep when adventure calls and he answers for weeks on end, security found in the matching rings he bought from his time in inazuma

but like first everythings, relationships are built to grow. but childe never does

the fluttering in your stomach is unpleasant. it's the cause for the shaking in your leg and the rambling thoughts plaguing your mind. you hadn't heard from childe in a month. 

usually, when he is taken by his job as a toymaker, he'll write to you, even if only occasionally. a silly recap of strange events, a small doodle of him hugging you, sometimes even a souvenir to remind you he keeps you in his thoughts. this time, nothing. 

the cold worms into your body in the dead of night. you know you should be asleep, but thoughts of him keep you glaringly awake. something tells you he’ll be back tonight, but even that prediction feels you with dread. when was the last time you felt secure in this relationship?

you perk up at the creaking of a door. it’s subtle, threatening to blow away in the night breeze, but you catch it by the throat. childe peers up too, eyes wide as he takes you in, illuminated by the moonlight. 

“what are you still doing awake?” his voice, once capable of settling every doubt, only enhances your fear. 

“is that all you have to say?” you croak, throat protesting at the lack of use. “childe, where have you been?”

your boyfriend steps closer, unravelling the red scarf from his neck and wrapping it around you instead. the material is cold against your skin. you would have preferred the night instead.

“babe, you know i had work.”

“for a month? and you couldn’t even let me know somehow that you were still alive?” your voice peaks and you find something cold drip down your cheek. “i thought you were dead.” 

the confession hangs suspended in the room, and yet whilst you hope childe will acknowledge it, he only sweeps a finger under your eye. you follow the movement in your peripherals and notice the lack of jewellery on his hand. “did you miss me?”

“childe, be serious. this, this can’t keep happening.”

“i’ll write to you, name.” he takes a hold of your hand and kisses the back of it. “i couldn’t stay away from you even if i tried.” 

you yank your hand back and the hurt that flashes across his face is more real than you’ve ever seen him act. “childe. i’m not joking. this isn’t about me missing you or just some petty issue. i’m scared.”

“of what, baby?”

your fingers curl inward at the pet name. “of us. of what it’s becoming. or what it hasn’t changed into.”

“we’re what we’ve always been. i didn’t find another girl while i’m away, if that’s what you’re asking.” he kisses your forehead lightly, delicately, like you’ll break under the touch. “you always did have the strangest thoughts. you know i love you. come on,you’ll catch a cold out here.” 

you refuse his hand, opting to force eye contact. “that’s the thing, childe. we’re what we’ve always been, we haven’t changed. or at least, you won’t let it. we’re not new lovers anymore, you can’t just solve every issue with a gift or a kiss. i liked you back then, but i love you now. i care about you. if we want to stay together, you have to take this more seriously.” 

maybe it’s his job that inhibits the progression of your relationship, or maybe he has never truly considered you as the end goal. maybe all you were was a first love and maybe his "i love you's" were never a lie, but also never a promise

maybe his heart is taken by you, but not his future

𓆏 › kaeya 

your boyfriend’s resilience is his strongest aspect, at least that’s what you’ve always believed. sometimes you’ll trace the scar that runs jagged across his eye and wish your kisses could heal the folds of skin, wishing your embraces could erase the pain from his past. but sometimes, you’ll believe he doesn’t need it, that he’s taken his painful moments in his stride, never letting a setback diminish his efforts, never letting a soul tell him that he isn’t everything he’s pushed himself to be 

his achievements stack one on one endlessly and the smiles down the street from strangers tells you he’s found his rightful place in the world

but just like how his eyepatch hides a permanent shame, his facade hides a brewing insecurity 

“drink with me.”

“kaeya,” you laugh off his approach and stand from the bar stool, the warm atmosphere leaving you temporarily dazed. “i can’t, i have a mission early tomorrow morning. you know i get horrible hangovers.”

something foreign washes over his face. it’s cast away almost immediately, enough for you to believe it was a simple trick of the eye so you blink it away with a smile. leaning down, you kiss kaeya on the cheek. “then, i’ll see you tomorrow afternoon for our date.” 

“hold on.” your boyfriend grabs onto your wrist, holding you in place. when you turn to look at him, you find his eyes looking elsewhere, before flickering to you. his mouth opens to distract you from the gesture, but you’re already turning to look as well. 

diluc stands not too far from the counter of the bar, talking quietly to another girl. you recognise her as an adventurer from liyue who had quickly won over the heart of the infamous dark knight. 

you hum in appreciation. “is that diluc’s girlfriend? they seem happy. good for them.” turning back to face him, you’re shocked to find his expression closed off. “is something wrong?”

when he smiles, you realise it doesn’t reach his eyes. “stay with me, darling, won’t you?” 

“i can’t, i already told you.” you say slowly, as if he hadn’t heard you the first time. the grip on his wrist tightens. “kaeya, you’re hurting me.” 

the hold stammers, but he refuses to let you go. “can’t you stay back just a little longer for me?”

“what is this all about?”

“nothing, i just miss you.” but his body language betrays his words. you look over at the happy couple in the corner again. 

“let go of my wrist.” you say. 

“i’m telling you to stay.” he snaps back. his eyes are burning into yours. “why can’t you just do this one thing for me?”

“you don’t control me, kaeya, don’t talk to me like that.” you try to shake off his hold but it only tightens and you’re sure if you were to look at it the next monring, it’ll be stained in blues and purples. “kaeya, i’m serious.”

“me too.” a harsh squeeze. “i’m telling you to stay.”

“you’ve had too much to drink. i’m taking you back home with me.”

“is everything okay over here?” your head snaps up at the new voice, finding diluc with his girlfriend before you, concerned at the commotion. 

you smile weakly, still unable to shake off your boyfriend’s hold. “sorry diluc, i think kaeya’s had too much tonight.” 

the red-haired man huffs, unimpressed. “of course he did. i should be the one apologising to you, name. will you take him home?”

you laugh briefly too. “of course. what else would i do.”

a flurry of movement catches your eyes and in the chaos, you realise kaeya had let go of your wrist. turning, you find diluc knocked to the ground, the perpetrator a familiar man with blue hair. 

“you think you’re so much better than me, don’t you, huh brother?” his voice tilters jeeringly. “now that you’ve gotten a girlfriend, you think you’ve beaten me? you think you’ve won?”

“kaeya! what are you doing?” you rush to the scene, holding your boyfriend back, your palm against his chest feeling his rapid heartbeat. “where did this come from?”

he turns mad eyes on you. “couldn’t you tell, name? didn’t you see him brag his new girlfriend right in front of me, thinking he can one-up me? he’s still over me beating him in the past, this is just a new scheme to get under my skin. well it worked, still doesn’t mean shit though, diluc. i’m better, i’m still better than you. my girlfriend’s better than yours, my life is better than yours, you’re nothing.” 

though kaeya tries to patch up his insecurities, you can feel the repressed emotions threatening to explode behind every kiss. and though you promise that you won’t leave him either, your heart skips a beat in fright with every scattered glance and every coded conversation between your boyfriend and his brother 

you realise it is true, then, when they say you must love yourself before you love others

𓆏 › xiao

the guardian yaksha, conqueror of demons, alatus the golden-winged king, xiao goes by many names but to you, he is simply just xiao

your first meeting seems alike a dream, a vigilant protector by your side warding off the grim reaper and sparing you a glance that made time stop and the wind cease its song. it was love at first sight, perhaps on both ends, and your relationship proceeded into something precious where his heart that only accepts few, accepts you

gentle touches and intimate, quiet sights, the small moments you shared with each other held close to your heart. perhaps it is the illusion that xiao was a secretive, selective person that led you to believe he would arrive with your every call 

you found security in a mirage 

throughout the day, you had spared multiple glances at the clock. you counted down the minutes of every hour and then every hour until sunset, until the clock finally struck 7pm and you were free. 

dashing into the street, you waved goodbye to your boss and headed down in the direction of the wangshu inn in a state of ecstasy. 

you hadn’t seen your boyfriend in days. of course, you expected something like this considering his reputable status in liyue, but it hurt nonetheless when your timetable and his activities avoided one another. tonight, however, it would be different. he had assured you with a kiss on the forehead and a caress of the cheek that he’ll make it for your one year anniversary, and the promise was sealed with a shared smile. today was even more so special because you had just been promoted in your job, meaning you had to transfer workspaces to inazuma.

how would you deal with the distance, you wondered in a spike of doubt, especially since the current distance was already barely tolerable?

you arrived on the roof of the inn just as the sun whispered its finally goodbye to the sky with an orchestra of pink and orange clouds, a familiar silhouette illuminated against the fading rays. 

“xiao!” you call, hurrying over. “you made it.”

“i won’t be getting commissions tonight.” he shuffles over subtly, making room for your presence. “i owe you that much.”

“you don’t owe me anything. but thank you.” you sit beside him, butterflies erupting in your stomach. glancing sideways, you watch him watch the sun. “actually, xiao, there’s something i’ve been meaning to say.”

xiao turns to you, not just his head but his entire body language, encouraging you in the silence and holding your gaze in his eyes. “i’m listening.”

“it’s nothing that important, i promise.” you laugh slightly. 

“anything you tell me is important.” 

you bite your lip. “the thing is, i told you about my current job right?”

“the one in liyue.” 

“well, that’s the thing. it might not be anymore?” 

xiao frowns. “you got fired?”

“no, i got promoted. to inazuma.” 

something passes across his face. his hand reaches over to grab yours, and he gives it a slight squeeze. “wait, that’s—”

“i know! it’s far.” though you weren’t sure what expression he’ll give at the news, you weren’t expecting the deep concentration on his face and the hand around yours. without knowing, you began to ramble. “i get that. and if you don’t want me to, i don’t have to accept the promotion, if you think it’s too much. i don’t want to put too much pressure on you and i know already we’ve been having issues with distance but—”

“not that.” xiao squeezes your hand again. “i have to go.”

you blink. “what?”

but he’s already standing, face to the wind. there’s that look of concentration again, but you realise it was never directed at you. a flash of golden glimmer and his staff appears in his hand. “name, i’m sorry but i we’ll continue this another time.”

“i thought you said you wouldn’t be accepting commissions tonight.” you stand as well. “you promised to be here.”

“i have a duty to serve. i’ll be back.”

“do your promises mean nothing?”

this time, he does spare you a glance. “the traveller. they called my name.’ he said as if that explained everything. and to him, it likely did. “i’ll talk to you later.”

the sudden turn of the wind left you alone and unsatisfied. the nerves from your conversation dissipate into disappointment just as the breeze turns cold. you hug your arms into your chest and seek warmth in yourself, but the hole that xiao leaves is gaping and wide.

waiting again, you sit on the roof of the inn. 

xiao’s heart is guarded; for good reason. it is difficult to balance the crucial people of his life leaving those close to his heart few. but amongst those, there are some he simply cannot help but prioritise over others, and it is a pity that you are at the bottom

not really the happiest w xiao's one but !! how did this end up 2k+ words ?? i do have zhongli's one written so i might do a cont. of this if this is particularly liked !! thank you for reading ☆

[katyspersonal]

your mutual friend group is terrifying and i love it

PFFFFTTTTtttTttTT I am glad to hear this, anon xD Honestly my random morbid cannibalism jokes is not even our final form, usually it goes more like:

nobody:

me, hyperexcited: GUYYYS GUYS I just realised something after playing BLORBOrne for 50th time, I am such a dumbass ahaha! Turns out that there is a very hard to see detail in the data of Boris (datamined by Russian hackers: ( x ))! The shade of his right eye is kinda white-ish which lines up with theme of losing eye color upon becoming a furry, so despite boasting about his grip he has been secretly reading furry pr0n comics more than he should have! (tagged: #blorborne #boris the cocksucker #blorborne observation #as usual I notice this kind of shit too late AAAAAAAAA #listen it is 5 AM don't @ me)

someone: Katy pls I don't even know who Boris IS 😭

me: What do you mean, he is an easy to miss summon in Horse-Plinked Village!!! By the way, there is a bunch of lore that can be concluded from his items that he never uses but they are in the game files, even though he doesn't have any dialogue!

someone: 😭😭😭

my friends FANDOMette, Wow and Chicken: *reblogging* (tagged: #this is sooooo interesting #really nice observation I never thought about that #I am NOT normal about this #blorborne #boris the cocksucker #nice to finally see more ideas about boris)

fareehaandtheitalians: Girl this is incredible I HAVE NO WORDS, I feel like I am gaining Insight points when I am reading your posts

Jara that reads like 'jara' and not like 'yara' lol: *reblogging* (tagged: #yeah nobody is really safe from corruption in this setting #just like in real life xd #no wonder that I like this game so much because it is just as hopeless as reality #xd #bloorborne)

Chicken: *reblogging from Jara that reads like 'jara'* *screenshot of the tags* GIRL ARE YOU OK 💀💀💀

me: *reblogging from Chicken* NO ONE WITH AT LEAST A BASIC AMOUNT OF BRAINCELLS CAN FEEL OK IT IS NO ONE'S FAULT THAT YOU THINK LIFE IS ANYTHING BUT FARM OF SUFFERING

me and Chicken: *start fighting in the reblogs with progressively ridiculous points about meaning of life and idiotic memes*

fareehaandtheitalians: *already started doodling a meme based on this, as if to immortalize it in a tapestry*

Boom: *reblogging the showdown at its final point when me and Chicken already obliterated one another into a bloody mess* (tagged: #ehehe #stay silly you two!)

other Elden Twink mutuals: *eat popcorn*

Comic: *reblogging* WHY CAN'T YOU TWO BE LEFT WITHOUT BEING WATCHED FOR EVEN ONE DAY?!

Jara that reads like 'jara': Lol I made everything become cursed again xd

Chicken: No, Jara (reads like 'jara'), it is not your fault! You see, none of this would have happened if SOMEONE finally admitted that they are simping for [insert a character that either has the worst haircut in the setting or is so generic-looking that it actually embarrasses me]

robertzombie: *reblogging* She WHAT? People in this fandom have the worst taste I swear

me: You see FRIEND, we will know who ACTUALLY has a bad "taste" when I try a meal out of certain "bird" if you see what I mean.....

Fandomette: KATY NO, DON'T EAT YOUR FRIENDS... You wanted to eat Mewmecolash or something stop 😭

me: WHY ABSOLUTELY EVERY SINGLE PERSON IS SO DEADSET ON OUTING MY SECRETS FOR RANDOM PEOPLE TO READ?????? (tagged: #lmao as if anyone is going to read us after shit like this)

Chicken: THIS IS REVENGE FOR YOU MOCKING MY SON SURPHERROTH MWAHAHAHAHA

me: I AM ENDING THIS POINTLESS FIGHT HERE BECAUSE UNLIKE YOU PUNKS I HAVE SOME REALLY IMPORTANT THINGS TO DO *spends the rest of the day napping or watching cursed Elden Twink challenges letsplays*

Wow: *messaging me in Discord* Dammit what was THAT hahaha

me: Thank you for NOT having my back as usual, well, at least you are good for finishing a dumb post with lol

[goldenslumbersketchbook]

What do you think of the book only characters like Kathrine, Nightlight, ect.

Thank you for the question!

Please note these are just my personal opinions, as of August 2023.

I judged everyone on three categories: Character, Design, and Drawability.

Katherine Shalazar

My opinion on Character 8/10

Adorable and smart and curious and just a lovely girl. Her story is pure fairy tale for a modern age. I believe Katherine is the glue that keeps everyone together, I think she is also a great leader. I want to rank her higher but she does often fall into the damsel in distress trope and is saved by others. I do love that she is never afraid to speak her mind and has a big heart. A classic character who I would love to see on the big screen.

My opinion on Design 7/10

Love the yellow coat. Love her design but it is missing “goose” when she is older and claims the title of mother goose. It would be cool to see added elements like feathers or wings or something more fairytale.

My opinion on Drawability 10/10

I love drawing Katherine. Her Yellow clothing choice makes her stand out. Her hair is fun and bouncy. I like drawing her in modern clothing. She is adorable and youthful! It’s fun drawing her in dynamic poses.

Nightlight (Pre Jack Frost Era)

My opinion on Character 8/10

So adorable and full of curiosity. I love how he is mainly a silent character. I think he is a great hero who at the end of the day is just a kid with the weight of the world on his shoulders. Nightlight is such an interesting character as he is pretty much the personification of light. He is new to earth and is just trying to figure things out.

My opinion on Design 5/10

A boy made of light has armor made of sharp darkness. I’m not a fan of the armor design, I don’t think it suits his character very much... Just my opinion. It is too thin and brittle looking, he looks more like someone working for Pitch then Manny. I do like his wispy hair though. It adds to his otherworldly charm.

My opinion on Drawability 7/10

I like drawing nightlight in casual clothes he deserves to be comfy. He is a silly boy who is fun to doodle. Especially his hair. It’s fun and wispy.

Ombric Shalazar

My opinion on Character 6/10

Ombric is your typical fantasy old wise fatherly wizard. He is a mentor and a joy to have around. It would have been cooler to see more of his abilities. His appeal and downfall is that he is a bit of a mystery. Not a favorite but I respect him.

My opinion on Design 4/10

Picture a traditional fairytale wizard, old with a long beard and a pointy hat and robes. Yup. Not much to excite the imagination. I would love to see Ombric get a more unique redesign. In a world of myths breaking traditional looks. Ombric falls a bit flat.

My opinion on Drawability ?/10

Never drew him before so no opinion. Maybe I should try.

Kailash

My opinion on Character 🪿/ 🪿

Honk nghh quack honk honk honk, honk. Honk honk quack honk honk: hahhh honk ha ha hank honk honk quack honk honk. Quack honk ugh honk ugh honk honk. Honk honky honk hank honk, hank, honk honk, ahhhhhhhhhhhh honk. Honk honk honk honk honk? Quack quack honk honk aaaaaaaaaaaaa honk honk honk honk.

My opinion on Design 🪿/ 🪿

Honk honk honk honnnnnk honk, honk honk honk honk honk. honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk ah honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk. Honk honk honk honk honk honk honk ugh honk honk honk ugh honk ugh honk honk honk honk honk honk honk. Honk honk honk honk honk honk. Quack honk honk honk honk honk honk aaahhh honk honk honk honk!

My opinion on Drawability 🪿/ 🪿

Quack honk honk honk honk honk. Aaaaaaa honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk: honk, honk, honk, honk aaa honk. Hank Ha Ha Ha ahhh honk honk honk honk honk honk. Honky honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk! honk honk honk hank honk honk honk. Quack quack honk honk quack, honk honk honk honk ah ah ah honk honk quack honk honk ahhhh honk honk

Emily Jane Pitchiner

My opinion on Character 10/10

She is one of the most interesting characters I’ve read. I want her to have a solo book. She is so full of anguish yet must remain a neutral party to keep the balance. I love the fact that we get her whole backstory and even get to see her own hero’s journey. Often time’s characters like her are portrayed as pure evil or pure good, it’s so refreshing to see how she remains neutral in her own fathers war. I adore her and all that she stands for. A character who has grown up quickly and coldly due to isolation and loss. My heart cries for her.

My opinion on Design 8/10

I like her long and flowing hair. Her dress consists of swirls that compliment her form and are fun to doodle. I know the drawings Joyce has provided us with are in black and white, but I love to imagine her in vibrant greens with hair as dark as a stormy night. She is so grand and knows how to make an entrance and take over a room with her presence.

My opinion on Drawability 10/10

I love drawing her so much. She is beautiful.

[futurequibblerjournalist]

Lol dingus is such a good word!!!! I'll be mega short w this bc I have a lot of other curiosities for you but

1 why do you think Igor went from laughing off Sev's 'ooh shut up meathead" stuff to being intimidated? Or whatever you think it was in Gob,,, and um

2 I saw you post Miss Macdonald and I was wondering if you had any rambles abt her :3

Anyway ur my fav lol UMMM bye bye :)

-🍃

Dingus is!!! MWAH!!! Also ahhhhh your fav [insert Debbie Ryan hair tucking emoji]

I think the change was that Severus finally had that upper hand on Igor that he'd wanted(??) but never quite managed because Igor would just laugh it off. Not even in a malicious way just in a sort of "you're so silly" sort of way. Their dynamic changed. Severus went from being a person he trusted to a person he still trusted but also to one he'd deliberately betrayed to save his own skin! That does something to a weirdly sexual pseudo friendship lmao. I'm not sure if I'm explaining this in exactly the right way but they're just jvnfjbngjb they're so complicated for a bunch of losers honestly

MISSS MARY MACDONALD!!!! The way I literally clapped my hands together and kicked my feet!! Yes I have rambles about her oh my gooood

I don't think about her as much as I should but urgh,, the woman that she is alright??

Mary was born Mary Aileen Macdonald in December 1959 in Scotland to muggle parents. She's the older sister of Michael Macdonald who was born four years after she was. She got her first name from her nan on her mum's side and her middle name from her nan on her dad's side. Growing up her dad was a greengrocer and she wanted to be one just like him. I feel like they could have had an English Cocker Spaniel when Mary was growing up though that might just be based off of the fact that I think that's an animal that represents her well

She was born with vitiligo and is mixed (Caribbean descent on her mother's side and Scottish on her dad's.) She's undoubtedly the prettiest girl in all of Gryffindor and she's known to be a bit boy crazy. I know some people hate this headcanon for her because female characters shouldn't revolve around male characters and I completely agree which is why that's not all she is!!! My girl Mary just falls in love easily and she always throws herself into her relationships. She's definitely got a bit of an insecurity about being loved for her body rather than her mind.

She is cherry!!! She owns that cherry red colour, she looks gorgeous in it and idk there's just something so cherry about her. She definitely wears cherry chapstick!! Those really cheap ones that smell lowkey super fake lol. Idk if cherry shampoo is a thing but if it is she's totally got it. I think Mary is a midsize queen and she rocks a fairly soft aesthetic that ends up looking a bit edgy because of all the red. She is the number one stealer of boyfriend hoodies/jumpers/jackets etc

During her time at Hogwarts she was sorted into Gryffindor and shared a dorm room with Marlene and Lily. I think she was a pretty average student. She wanted to be better but also she didn't want to devote more time than necessary to boring stuff like school lol. I do think she did really well in divination tho. She dotted all her i's with hearts and she made both M's in Mary and Macdonald into hearts (I made a little doodle to illustrate lol this is from the yearbook thing and I need to correct the D)

I think she's got a complex relationship with her sexuality. I'm kinda liking the idea of asexual Mary ngl. She's over sexualised by her peers and yet she didn't want one bit of it. She falls in love easily but why does everyone think that means she sleeps around?? She's extremely sex-positive and like,, wants sex for girls to be liberated and stigma-free and all that despite her asexuality and I think part of that comes from how people assume things about her and have no problem slutshaming her but they'd never do it to a guy like Sirius who actually slept around a tonne!! At some point, I'll do a fic or something deep-diving into Mary and her relationship with wanting love without it being connected to sex. Might be my first full-on MaryLily fic, who knows, I think they're cute sometimes

Speaking of Mary and girls I think she's so different with crushes on girls than on boys. With boys she's super out there, flirting, touching, batting her lashes etc but with girls she's much more shy and it's much more confusing for her but she's so sweet about it jnvjfnbjg

Just like how she loves loudly she laughs loudly. Her nose scrunches when she laughs. She makes sure all her friends get gifts from her at Christmas, even if it's just a small keychain or something from her dad's shop.

She spends ages getting ready in the morning and she spends ages in the bathroom in general making sure she smells nice, looks nice, the whole shebang. She loves to paint nails and she will offer to pierce your ears with nothing but an ice cube, a needle and a dream lmaooo

I think she was big into photography and she would run around with her muggle camera (that she put stickers and little sticky gems and stuff all over) taking pictures of everyone. Her patronus is a lamb because Mary had a little lamb!!!!

I don't think her dream of becoming a greengrocer stuck around tbh lol. I think she wanted to do something that could help other people and my Mary-as-a-healer dreams are out there but also my girl does not have the grades and she spent SO LONG sobbing in the girl's dorms when she found out she wouldn't be able to become a healer because of her lacking grades. I'm not sure what she ends up doing instead but I'd be so curious if anyone out there has any ideas!!

There's also the fact that Bruce Mulciber Jr and Edmund Avery Jr canonically assaulted her at some point during her time at school (at a time Severus and Lily were still talking so I'm thinking this went down in their fifth year) so there's also just,, that whole can of worms to look into. Igor Karkarov mentions that Mulciber (thought this could both be Junior and Senior) specialised in the Imperius curse though I doubt he'd have gotten away with assaulting anyone with the Imperius curse without being expelled; it just kinda tells you something about the stuff he's capable of/willing to do. I also believe it's actively Mulciber who attacks her and Edmund is more of a bystander?? I'm not entirely sure but that's how I understood it. I wouldn't be surprised if Edmund was the brain behind the whole thing though and cursed her to hang and dangle somewhere embarrassing by having her touch insert object someone would be likely to pick up off the floor or something like that

anyways that was my long ass starter ramble on the lovely Miss Macdonald now have a moodboard jngjbngjb

[smol-tired-binch-blog]

Gotta vent rq but like GOD I want to draw I love doodling I love my silly little sketches I miss drawing the yakoozies and magical girls but like I need a laptop replacement which i WILL be getting but it won't be for weeks. So i have a sketchbook. That should be nice right? I mean i only started digital art in like 2020, maybe late 2019, should be fine?

NO, i was so HYPE for my first ever Surface BECAUSE i Am Not Good With Pen And Paper! And i say that as someone who has been drawing since she was like 4, yknow? I remember drawing in my sketchbooks, I remember my Creepypasta OCs from when i was 14. I remember thinking how one day I'd be REALLY good at drawing, noticing my progress and looking forward to more. Turns out though, i can get proportions right in the first go. And for some reason i never have a decent eraser, so trying again and again is just frustrating and ruins the paper or still leaves those ugly indents and smudges.

Like on a computer, you can SELECT specific parts of the drawing and CHANGE THE SIZE!! you can use LAYERS!!! You can sketch and then linework til your hearts content, and yeah it fucks me off, but it's somehow reassuring thay i can just delete the layer, delete the whole thing and start again simple as. I can zoom in, i can press the Undo button. I can draw until it looks nice. Cant do that with paper.

"Oh but sketchbooks are MEANT to be for your ugly stuff" I DONT CARE. I DONT WANT UGLY STUFF. I WANT TO BE ABLE TO DRAW MY OCS AND MY FAVE CHARACTERS AT LEAST SOMEWHAT COMPETENTLY FROM THE GET GO. Like jesus you'd think I'd know what koi boi and his skinny twink boyfriend look like by now but NOPE. it frustrates me PERSONALLY because i like a silly little sketch, i can have it be a lil rough, a lil simple. But it needs to be Recognisble and Nice Enough. Fuck this.

[tenswrld]

old enough to understand

mark lee x reader, childhood friends to lovers, fluff

summary: now that you’re older, you seem to finally understand how mark makes you feel

a/n: came up with this at 2am while listening to my mark lee dedicated playlist and pluto projector came on and u already know that one part made me emotional also do u like my doodles i made on the photo ^^

growing up, you were surrounded by the concept of love. you witnessed it with your parents, when you got your first pet, and even when you took your first bite into your favorite fruit.

when you first met mark lee at the age of 6, you didn’t think that the word love would apply to him. at least, not in the way that you knew it. 

“no! it’s mine, i don’t want to give you any!” the young boy yelled.

“you can just go get more! i just want some watermelon!” you screamed back.

“go get some yourself!”

angry, you stomped away towards the table of adults. “mrs. lee, mark won’t give me a piece of his watermelon.”

the older woman laughed softly before getting up and leading you to the table of fruit. “forgive him, watermelon is his favorite. i’ll be sure to make sure he shares next time, okay?”

while you ate your own fruit alone in the grass, mark came up to you scratching his neck awkwardly, avoiding eye contact. “i’m sorry for being rude...i just really like watermelon...”

you narrowed your eyes at him before bursting into a fit of giggles, offering your own watermelon out to him. “it’s okay, mark, i like watermelon too. i understand.” he took the piece that you held out to him and took a seat next to you.

when you first met mark, you didn’t think anything of him except for that he was the dorky boy next door who seemed to reserve the concept of love for his favorite fruit.

in middle school, you and mark seemed to clash heads more often than not, and you found it hard to stick around him. desperate to seem cool in front of the new friends that he made, mark steered away from you and teased you whenever he saw you in the halls. you almost despised him in your middle school years, but no matter how much teasing he did mark always waited for you outside of the school gates and walked you home safely. 

though he was still unsure of the role you had in his life, mark knew that he wanted to keep you around.

in high school, your parents fantasized about the idea of the two of you dating, but you and mark always recoiled at the thought. friend groups and social status set you and mark even further apart and before you knew it you became a messenger to girls who wanted mark to call their own. when you got your first boyfriend in sophomore year, mark tried to warn you that the guy was no good, but like always you never listened to him. when he broke your heart, you expected mark to scold you and tell you he told you so, but he provided you comfort in his arms instead.

though he didn’t love you then, mark vowed that he would never let your heart get broken again.

when it came time for you and mark to go off to college, you found yourself a lot more upset than you had initially thought you would be. you were excited to go off and find yourself elsewhere, but something about not having the silly, brown haired boy by your side 24/7 felt strange. granted, you two weren’t as close as your six year old self thought you would be, but you found that you and mark held a special type of bond that you feared you wouldn’t find anywhere else. 

you still hadn’t figured out your love for mark lee, but you knew that leaving him was one of the hardest things you’ve ever had to do.

“just...promise to call often, okay?” you told him as you walked with him to his car, a box of his things in your arms.

mark’s lips curled up into a smug smile. “why? gonna miss me that much?” 

you rolled your eyes. “you’re making me regret saying that. you’ll be lucky if i don’t block you after this, idiot.”

mark laughed loudly and you found yourself smiling softly at the sound. you placed the box in his truck before you both turned to each other. “i’ll text you everyday and call when i can. don’t worry, you can’t get rid of me that easily. you’ll probably be hearing about my uncontrollable gas everyday so if that’s not what you’re looking for then...”

you laughed and shoved his shoulder, mumbling for him to shut up. “it’s gonna be weird without you, i think.”

mark shrugged. “yeah, well, we’ll see each other again. just think about it like that time where you got so mad at me for blowing up your house in minecraft that you ignored me for a week!”

mark expected you to laugh but became concerned when he saw your lip quivering and your eyes threatening to spill tears. “y/n? sorry, is that, like, a sensitive memory?”

when you suddenly wrapped your arms around his torso and mumbled a soft ‘i’ll miss you’ into his chest, mark cursed at himself for being the first one to fall in love.

___

“isn’t it like 4am for you? you should go to bed,” you scolded him half heartedly. you sat at your vanity on facetime with a sleepy mark as you did your nightly skincare routine.

mark groaned through the phone and shook his head. “but i wanna talk to you,” he whined groggily. “i miss you.”

your cheeks heat up and you smiled shyly. “i miss you too, mark.”

mark blinked slowly with a tired look, his hair all messed up and his face in need of a shave. he watched you silently as you rubbed your moisturizer into your skin, smiling at the sight. “...you’re really pretty you know that?”

you froze and chuckled nervously, keeping yourself busy with your moisturizer so you didn’t have to see the way mark was looking at you. “you’re talking nonsense again.”

he grumbled, “i’m not talking any nonsense. you’re so pretty, y/n, i miss seeing your face. i hate facetime and my shit wifi.”

“you’re rambling, marky, go to bed,” you ushered him, this time grabbing your phone to look at him.

he smiled fondly at you. “i like it when you call me marky.”

“okay, i’ll call you it more if you go to bed.” 

mark huffed and complied, bidding you one last goodbye. “fine. i miss you so much, y/n, call me tomorrow.”

“okay, i will.”

“promise?” mark asked softly, peeking open one eye to look at you.

“i promise, you big baby.”

“okay, goodnight. love you,” mark mumbled softly into his pillow, already half asleep.

your breath hitched in your throat at his words. you two hardly ever said that phrase to each other but you began to realize that nowadays mark seemed to say it quite often. before, you’d probably make a face in disgust at the cheesiness, but now it only made your stomach sick with butterflies.

“yeah, love you too, marky. sleep tight.” 

already fast asleep, mark stayed silent. your thumb hovered over the ‘end call’ button, but you waited a few more seconds just to look at how peaceful mark looked. you could see the sky turning from a dark black to a paler blue from his window, making you frown since the boy had stayed up so late. before you could look at him any longer, you ended the call and sat back in your chair.

loving mark lee had always seemed impossible to you, but now you realized that it was the one thing that you wanted to do for the rest of your life.

___

you spent a lot of time thinking about your feelings for mark while you were away and most of it was you being in denial. you thought that maybe it was just because you weren’t used to being so far away from him, but deep down you knew otherwise. your friends had tried setting you up on blind dates, yet no one seemed to fill in the gap that you felt you had in your heart.

after you finished your first year of college, your mother began to pester you about having a boyfriend for you to bring home for the holidays. yet no matter how many guys you thought about, your mind would always bring you back to mark.

it was now christmas time and your family and mark’s family were going to have a small get together, meaning that you and mark would get to spend time with each other in person again. you weren’t sure if you should tackle mark at the sight of him, but you figured he would do the same to you anyway.

“y/n, sweetheart! my gosh, it’s been so long! you’ve grown up so well,” mark’s mother cooed as she gave you a warm hug.

you chuckled and returned her hug, replying with, “thank you, mrs. lee. it’s nice to see you again.”

she playfully nudged your shoulder. “any boyfriend yet?”

you laughed awkwardly and shook your head, looking away. “oh, um, no...not yet.”

she beamed. “mark will be happy to hear that.” she said it so fast that you almost didn’t catch it. “he’s out back waiting for you. i told him i’d tell him when you got here, but it’ll be a nice surprise for him,” she winked.

you thanked her briefly before making your way to the backyard excitedly. you thought that you’d be more nervous facing the boy you loved but, frankly, all you wanted to do was finally tell him that you loved him.

when you opened the door mark immediately turned his head, expecting to see his mom, but his facial expression completely changed when he saw you. he ran up to you with the brightest smile on his face and engulfed you into his arms. you laughed joyously into his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you as close to his chest as humanly possible.

“you have no idea how long i’ve been waiting to do that,” he mumbled into your hair.

you smiled against his shoulder before pulling away to look at him. the two of you held eye contact for what felt like an eternity before mark finally returned his arms back to his side.

“even though we call everyday, it feels like i’m meeting you for the first time all over again,” mark said with a light laugh.

“i hope i lived up to your expectations, then,” you joked.

mark smiled fondly at you before brushing snow out of your hair. “definitely above expectations.”

you blushed at his comment but thanked the cold weather for hiding your rosy cheeks. before you could make more small talk, mark burst out into another sentence.

“y/n, i have to get this off of my chest before i explode,” he blurted.

your eyes widened and you nodded your head. “oh, um, okay, what is it?”

he gripped at his hair and turned around, beginning to whine. “oh my god, i’m gonna sound like the biggest idiot on earth. please don’t hate me after this.”

“...what did you do, mark?”

“i didn’t do anything! well...” he faced you again with a sigh and grabbed your hands taking you by surprise. “y/n, i’m in love with you. and i know you probably just see me as that stupid annoying boy your mom forced you to be friends with but i’ve loved you for over a year and it’s driving me crazy and i-”

“mark!” you interrupted him, placing a hand over his mouth. he looked at you with wide eyes while you smiled at him, practically glowing with happiness. you removed your hand from over his mouth and he sighed again.

“just reject me so i can go cry in my room.” mark shut his eyes and prepared himself for rejection but it never came.

“i love you too, mark.”

mark opened one at to stare at you suspiciously. “...really? like, seriously?”

you chuckled. “yes, really. for a few months now.”

“wait, you’re not pranking me or anything, right?” mark asked with a small laugh.

you glared at him. “mark...”

“i’m sorry, i’m just really surprised!” mark opened his mouth to say something but then gasped and dug into his back pocket to grab something.

when he pulled out a small piece of mistletoe you seemed to fall in love with the brunette boy all over again. he grabbed one of your hands and gently pulled you closer to him, using the other hand to hold the mistletoe over your guys’ heads. 

“i brought this just in case. i know that you’ve always fantasized about a moment like this so...” he said sheepishly. “kiss me?”

you laughed and brushed his hair out of his eyes before cupping his cheeks and placing a soft kiss on his lips. you felt him smile into the kiss, making you laugh and pull away.

“been waiting for that one too, huh?” you teased.

mark waved the mistletoe above the two of you and shook his head. “less talking and more kissing please...”

it took you over 10 years for you to realize that you loved mark lee but, if you had to, you would do it all over again in a heartbeat.

[redvanillabee]

Ship Ask Meme: Peggysous Edition

I got a secret ask(?) from someone who should be on hiatus right now asking me to do this ask meme for Peggysous. So here we go!

Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling/vice versa

Hurricane Peggy stops for nothing and no one, let alone a measly little push/pull sign!

When Peggy is on a roll, she misses the push/pull signs. If anything, Peggy is very good at reading the design cues on a door. So when a door with no clearly visible pull bar has to be pulled? That’s on the door and the door designer, not her.

Who doodles little hearts all over the desk with their initials inside them

If anyone finds a bunch of old notes with <3 P+D distractedly drawn all over the back, they must be sorely mistaken.

Peggy is a doodler; it helps her focus, and sometimes they are secret little notes to herself. Once she settles into the relationship and when she gets lost in her thoughts, she would doodle, and her subconscious just takes charge and draws little hearts. Once she comes around though, she blushes furiously. Part of her wants to berate herself for behaving like a teenage girl, but really she likes it. That there’s someone who can make her feel all silly and giddy and in love like that again, after everything.

Who starts the tickle fights

Daniel. Both of them are repeat offenders with bringing work home, but Peggy in particular can’t shut off work stuff even by bedtime. To cheer her up and/or get her mind off work, Daniel tickles her. Here’s the thing: Peggy is very ticklish. The one weakness of the invincible and invulnerable Margaret Carter, future director of SHIELD, is that she cannot stand being tickled at all. A good tickle fight sends her laughing and squealing, and Peggy...

Who starts the pillow fights

...and Peggy will not hesitate to retaliate by turning it into a pillow fight. She loves the tickles; there aren’t that many people she allows to see her like that, and she enjoys the casual intimacy. And it’s just fun. But she also likes to win. So once Daniel gets a few innings, she will whack a pillow into his face.

Who falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smile

Daniel. It’s not that he is necessarily a night owl, he just really cherishes being one of the few—if not the only person—around whom Peggy lets her guard down. So to see that razor sharp mind relax for the night as she drifts off to sleep, the way her face relaxes, looking way younger and more open than the world would ever see...it’s something he will never take for granted.

(Peggy loves the way Daniel looks asleep too, but once she hits the hay at night, she falls asleep way too quickly. So instead it’s the mornings for her. The way he looks mussed up from sleep in the early morning glow, soft and pliant with tousled curls sticking up every which way...that is when she is glad she opened her heart up to love again after the war.)

Who mistakes salt for sugar

Neither. Their home is pretty well organised, so it’s not common for them to make that mistake. And as Daniel will insist to anyone who doesn’t believe them, salt and sugar look different.

(There are, however, a few hilarious incidents when a particularly groggy, sleep-deprived, and under-caffeinated Daniel unloaded spoonfuls of salt into his coffee. But no one needs to know about that.)

And if Peggy has claimed multiple times in NY SSR that she mistook something else for sugar...well, if they think she’s too stupid to identify sugar, they can make their coffees themselves.

Who lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1am in the morning

Both are repeat offenders. They have had enough late nights that a snack at 1am is just a given, and is always welcome. Frankly, the loud beep is a good wake-up call.

Who comes up with cheesy pick up lines

Daniel. Peggy thinks they’re awful, but when it comes from someone she loves who just wants to make her smile, it’s hard not to crack up. And Daniel does love messing with her.

Who rearranges the bookshelf in alphabetical order

Neither. They will grumble about ‘doing it this weekend’ when they need to find a particular book but couldn’t, but really, it just makes more sense to arrange them by their own patterns than plain alphabetical (theme then preference for Peggy, old vs new then theme for Daniel).

Who licks the spoon when they’re baking brownies

Peggy is not patient enough to wait for brownies to be done before tasting them. And—as she frantically explains with a blush when Daniel catches her licking the spoon—she’s just cleaning the spoon!

(Daniel likes the taste of brownie batter, but thinks the texture is a bit meh. And if Peggy wants the spoon, well, he’ll gladly hand it over.)

Who buys candles for dinners even though there’s no special occasion

They both do.

Life’s too short to not sprinkle a bit of magic into everyday life. At the start of their relationship, they tried to mark all those special days. Birthdays, anniversaries, holidays…but too often those have to be rescheduled thanks to a combination of work, injuries, and extremely rude villains who have no consideration of other people’s plans. And really, when you can never tell what might come up tomorrow, the best option is to seize the day and make every moment special.

Who draws little tattoos on the other with a pen

Peggy. I really see her as a doodler. It began with her tracing little patterns on Daniel’s arm with her fingers. But sometimes, say, on a carefree Sunday morning when they’re just relaxing in the living room, Daniel with a book (or a ridiculous tabloid magazine—see the last question), Peggy armed with a pen from doing crosswords, she starts doodling.

(Fun fact: apparently it is real that one of SOE’s tests for their potential recruits is whether they can solve crossword puzzles. The rationale behind is testing whether a potential spy/code breaker can guess at the crossword author’s intended message, as one would when piecing together a potentially jumbled, broken, or misspelt piece of intercepted communication.)

Who comes home with a new souvenir magnet every time they go on vacation

(I reckoned that these two predate souvenir magnets, so I had to go look it up. Apparently while magnets have been around for millennia, souvenir fridge magnets weren’t really popularised until the 1960s, which makes sense considering fridges as we know them didn’t become commonplace until post-war. So souvenir fridge magnets definitely predate the canon timeframe of these two. But headcanoning these two’s travels by the time of the 60s…)

Daniel. While I doubt their work leaves them much time for vacationing, they do travel for work. And when it takes him some place special, he likes to remember the trip with a fridge magnet. Peggy likes looking at them, but she wouldn’t really pay for one herself unless it’s very, very special—either because of the destination or the design. Anything other than that, she argues, is just tourist trap.

(Besides, it’s not common for Peggy to have to travel for work. When she has to be on the move, tourist souvenirs are usually pretty down low on her agenda.)

Who convinces the other to fill out those couple surveys in the back of magazines

Daniel, duh. I refuse to believe that someone who waves a magazine at Peggy to tell her that Whitney Frost is Agnes Cully doesn’t also read them on the regular. They are filled with made up gossips, yes, but sometimes the darnedest clues are buried in the ridiculous Hollywood speak. And while Peggy thinks they are an awful and ridiculous waste of time, Daniel definitely thinks they’re funny because they’re such an awful and ridiculous waste of time. So when Peggy’s biting her pen trying to figure out what 7-letter word should go into 3-down, he will nudge her to answer. ‘Peg, Peg you have to pick one. You—no it’s not a waste of time, this is crucial to the longevity of our marriage! Which is your favourite room in the house, the bedroom, the kitchen, or the living room? Come on-’

And much as she tries, she can’t help but crack up at those sincere puppy eyes. ‘Bedroom. And I can show you exactly why it’s my favourite.’

[cobaincreates]

smart decisions

warnings: drinking, angst, smut, fingering, nsfw, 18+

count: 10k+

hiiiiiiiii so i’m a horndog & i can’t get enough of rafe cameron (or drew) or college rafe & i also wanna cry over them so here you go. let me know whatcha thinkin’. please i’m begging you. 

also the photo isn’t mine i got it from here!

songs i imagined - this one & this one

— — —

transferring colleges had to have been your smartest decision to date. going from putting your strengths into a place that was not willing to acknowledge them to, now, receiving credit where credit was most deservingly due. your first choice for school had been some place close to home, you figured why not opt for the cheaper option to save yourself, and your parents, a little money. you spent a few months getting into the swing of things, heading to class each day with a fresh mind and hopeful thoughts. it wasn’t until six months in that you realized you deserved so much better, and at a better school.

it took time, figuring out your best bet and where to go and all the finances. you definitely grew impatient a year in, trying to stick it out at home to receive your credits. but once the moment arrived, you packed all your things and moved states away. you loved it; you loved the classes, you loved your friends, you loved your professors. you were completely happy with your choice to go. your parents might not have been, but the weekly calls home for your progress report were substitute enough.

wednesday, 5 p.m.

you scribbled a doodle you had been going over and over, darkening the lines so much you saw it behind your eyelids now. you snapped out of it and looked back at your textbook.

the library was so quiet, you heard pages being turned from every corner, the chewing of gum from a tense jaw, and the soft snores of someone passed out in one of the private cubicles across the way. none of those things distracted you really since you had come to the study session with a couple of your friends, all three of you making a pact to get shit done.

melly was able to listen to music while she studied and was more of a typer as her fingers moved fast along the keys of her laptop. she came dressed in her comfiest clothes, sporting a knit sweater and joggers. lina had snacks across the table to keep her sustained. she was a strong believer that she learned better while being fed. it made you laugh still. she was a writer like you, very organized in her notes with highlighters and different colored pens. she even drew headers for each page for the hell of it. you wondered where she got the drive. then there was you, black ink, the main topic underlined, things to remember written repeatedly. you learned better after writing things down, you couldn’t just read a book and have the information implanted in your brain. as much as you wished it were that easy.

you were studying for an upcoming psychology test, one that you were sure would be a piece of cake given how well you did in the class itself. it was one you didn’t plan on taking, but you needed another course to get enough credits for the year.

lina was munching on some almonds, turning a page in her notebook, and picking up a blue pen. you were in the middle of writing a definition down and filling up the last of the page, your hand starting to cramp with how much pressure you were using. you flexed it once you put your pen down and squeezed an imaginary ball.

both yours and lina’s eyes flicked up to melly across the table who let out a low moan. she was pulling her headphones off and looking in the completely opposite direction of her computer.

“why is he so fine?” she asked, low enough for the two of you to hear.

you looked over your shoulder at the same time lina did and searched in the general area melly was focused on. all you saw was a guy walking through the library, sporting a backpack and a lacrosse sweatshirt, the hood pulled over his head.

“he really knows what he’s doing, huh?” lina said dreamily.

you furrowed your eyebrows as you watched him turn into a row of books and you glanced at melly as you faced the other way, planning on getting back to your work. melly was dazed as she still looked in his direction.

“who is that?” you asked after a moment of both of them still ogling.

lina turned toward you as melly closed her laptop a little to lean over it. “what did you just say?”

you looked between the two identical shocked expressions and laughed helplessly. “who is that?”

“oh, i forgot. you’re still new.” melly nodded in semi-acceptance then became serious. “that’s rafe cameron. he’s on the lacrosse team and we’re kind of obsessed with him.”

“it’s alarming,” lina said. she gave a quick glance over her shoulder then looked back at her notebook. “i love making myself sad over him not noticing me, but it’s fine. what’s even more alarming is how he’s still single.”

“i cannot express to you, y/n, how good,” melly emphasized, squeezing her eyes shut, “he looks with a little sweat.”

“you guys sound like stalkers.” you pointed out, smiling a little at their explanations.

“i’m not denying it. i said it was alarming.” lina shrugged as she looked from her textbook to her writing. “we’ve talked to him a couple of times at some parties, he’s a super nice guy but we just find him attractive. i think if i were a freshman, i’d be pathetically pining after him.”

melly hummed in agreement, her chin now propped in her palm. she wore a doe-like look, gazing between yours and lina’s heads and into the bookshelves. “don’t they have a game tomorrow? we should go.”

“it’s away.” lina said, but you had already lost interest in the topic and started reading a new chapter. you picked your pen back up, the muscles in your hand now relaxed, and the boy in the bookshelves out of your mind.

monday, 9 a.m.

you were going to be late and you hated the thought. there was no way you could miss this test when you had done nothing but study every last page for it. you even lost track of how many pages of notes you wrote for the test alone. it would be such a waste to miss it and it wasn’t worth getting a negative grade.

being late was not at all your fault. you had set your alarm early, eaten breakfast and read a few more chapters to get ahead, and packed your bag up so you’d be ready after a quick shower. turned out that all the showers on your floor were broken, the yellow “do not cross” tape like a bad omen. you started muttering to yourself as you carried along your shower caddy, going down to the next floor and finding a line to wait in. you knew it was probably your best bet instead of racing to another floor to check if there were more lines, plus you didn’t know how much time you had. you probably annoyed some people with the fidgeting, but all you could think about was the test.

it was ridiculous how long the showers took and how you had to leave your hair damp as you ran back up physical stairs. you burst through your door, threw your bathroom things on your bed, grabbed your bag and the few books you couldn’t stuff in. while leaving, the door shutting behind you, you made do with damp hair, twisting it up and out of your face. as you checked the time, you figured out that you had eight minutes exactly to get across campus and in your seat with a writing utensil ready.

even though you were late, you still held doors open for people, and you dodged others walking the opposite direction instead of the other way around. you kept checking the time as if the minutes would stop moving.

just as you were looking into your bag, your legs moving fast and assuredly, you ran right into something hard. you dropped the textbooks that you had been clutching, even with a death grip on them, and your bag slipped from your shoulder. a notebook poked out along with a pen rolling away on the walkway.

“woah,” the hard surface said.

“i’m so sorry, i was not looking.” you said quickly and bent down to get your things. of course, this would happen while you were in a rush. you supposed you were lucky it didn’t involve cars. god, that would’ve been so much worse.

“nah, it’s alright.” they said easily and bent down beside you, retrieving your things.

you scrambled for everything and shoved the notebook back into your bag. you spotted your keychain near their foot, their fingers closing around it before you could reach for it. you finally looked up as they held the key out to you, the ring hanging from their finger.

rafe cameron.

he looked different now that you could see his face better. and also, because he was so close this time. it was odd to know now that he had blue eyes and a light ghosting of stubble along his jaw and cheeks. it felt too personal being this close to someone you only knew the name of.

you felt a little silly for bumping into him, but you didn’t let it show. “thank you,” you said as you took the key from him and stood quickly to walk away. lina and melly surely wouldn’t give this up when you told them.

rafe had watched after you for a moment before turning back to his friend topper, raising his eyebrows in reference to what happened, and continuing their conversation.

you made it to class about three minutes late and sat in your seat, finally taking a breath. you settled in, putting your things at your feet, and digging around for a pen. all thoughts of bumping into rafe cameron left your mind.

8 p.m.

“you what?” melly coughed violently as she composed herself. lina was clutching her stomach, nearly dying of hysterics when the drink came out of melly’s nose a second earlier.

you held your head in your hands and inwardly groaned at having to tell the story. you were out to dinner with the two girls, munching on french fries and milkshakes. it was typical for you three to hang out on mondays since melly usually had a bad case of them each week. you had innocently slipped in that you just so happened to run into rafe cameron this morning and well, you hadn’t expected that to be melly’s reaction.

“i ran into him. i was late this morning and i wasn’t looking.” you could feel the embarrassment settle in as you recounted the minor event, at least to you.

“did he say anything?” her eyes were blown wide as she leaned across the table.

“i didn’t try to have a conversation with him.” you shrugged and picked at the plate of fries at the center of the table. melly gave you a look of mild bewilderment, the shock of it wearing off.

“missed opportunity.” lina joked, taking a long sip of her shake. “i wouldn’t know what to say either if i ran into him.”

you felt your shoulders loosen as the topic was slowly changing. melly laughed at lina’s remark, teasing her that she would’ve frozen up from bumping into anybody. you smiled and were glad that both of them didn’t take the story too seriously.

minutes later you were laughing loudly, head thrown back as melly was telling a story about her family and a public mishap with a tire. it was interesting to you to hear about what it was like growing up in a completely different environment than the one you did. you supposed that’s something you loved about college; getting to meet people from so many other states and cities.

you were smiling to yourself as you dipped a fry into your shake. just as you put it into your mouth and looked across the table at melly, her composure changed.

“oh, fuck.” she whispered and noticeably tried to look away. “don’t look.”

both you and lina turned around to look toward the front door. a dense group of bodies was coming in through the door, the atmosphere’s volume increasing with their chatter. toward the back you recognized rafe cameron. you weren’t sure at all what it was that made your heart clench in your chest.

“i said don’t look!” melly whispered louder. “oh, god. okay. act normal.” melly straightened up, trying not to be obvious with looking in their direction. you laughed and sat back in the seat. lina practically sunk into hers.

you didn’t watch as they approached, but you did look up once rafe entered your peripheral vision. he was with the guy from this morning, even if you hadn’t noticed him before. you just remembered rafe crouched in front of you while someone just as tall stood behind him, waiting. both of them were sporting lacrosse sweatshirts, along with some others in the group.

“hey, rafe.” melly said easily like she hadn’t just been freaking out over him a second ago.

you watched rafe lift his chin, smiling genuinely at her. you didn’t think anything of it when he glanced at you, the recognition so obvious as his face changed. he continued to walk to his table though, eyes steady on you for what felt like too long.

melly turned around and sank over the table, her mouth open in shock. “oh my god,” she said above the surface.

“oh my god,” lina said, turning to you in bafflement. “i feel like i’m in an alternate universe. did that just happen?”

“he just recognized me.” you brushed it off.

“no, y/n, he knew you. that was longer than five seconds.”

“why are you guys so obsessed with him anyways?” you laughed, trying to take the attention off you.

lina shrugged, seeming taken aback with the question. “i don’t really know.”

“because he’s gorgeous, that’s why.” melly intervened, dipping a fry into her shake.

you looked over melly’s shoulder, wondering what it was exactly that was so intriguing about the lacrosse player. you had had your fair share of athletes and could agree on some being drop dead gorgeous. maybe rafe cameron was just a nice guy all around and melly and lina just had pleasant interactions with him. maybe he was the type of college boy that looked out for everyone’s wellbeing and that’s what made your friends obsess over him. it could be a number of things.

thursday, 8 p.m.

you rubbed your eyes, yawning in the middle of it, and lay back on your bed. you had just closed your computer after typing up a 10-page essay. it was nine when you started it this morning. you were just glad your one class of the day was canceled and that you had time to write the paper before next week. plus, there were no classes tomorrow, and you could have a whole day of doing nothing. you were stoked, to say the least.

feeling a vibration beside you, you reached for your phone and opened a text from lina. incoming in 5, it said, followed by a rattling of knocks on your door. you rolled off the bed and shuffled over, finding her and melly with wide smiles. it was infectious as you felt your own smile appearing on your face.

“what are you guys doing here?” you asked curiously, stepping aside to let them in. the door clicked softly shut as you followed melly to your bed where she went to sit. lina leaned against the wall across from you, careful of your roommate’s things.

“we were invited to a party and we were wondering if you wanted to come with.” lina said, sharing a quick look with melly.

you glanced between them, eyes narrowing. “what’s so special about this party?”

“god, how can you even tell that?” melly asked, slightly rolling her eyes.

“you guys have known each other longer than i've known either of you, but you’re easy to read.” you laughed.

“i don’t like that.” melly said quietly to herself.

you grinned at her, noting her curls springing around her face. melly usually had her hair pulled back out of the way and it was very rare to see her with a different hairstyle. there had been some days where she had braids and you enjoyed seeing the change of pace. lina on the other hand always let her hair down. tonight though, she had straightened it and thrown it into a high ponytail. you hadn’t really gone to a lot of parties with the girls, so seeing them all done-up was always fascinating.

“seriously, what’s the deal?” you asked again, looking to lina since she was the one who had proposed the idea.

she shared another look with melly again before finally coming out with it. “it’s at rafe cameron’s apartment.”

you felt that clenching again in your chest, in that same spot from last night. you swallowed, feeling how dry your mouth was in the span of three seconds.

“well, it’s his and topper’s apartment, so not technically just his.” lina said, waving her hand in enunciation. she crossed her arms. “i have this study group with topper and he invited me and mel and anyone else really.”

“come on, it’ll be fun.” melly said, nudging your arm.

you looked at the girl beside you, ready to say no mostly in panic of seeing rafe. you had nothing to worry about or freak out over, but it was a scary thought. so many things happened at parties. so many things could happen.

“okay,” you said easily.

the prior fears dissipated quickly as lina and melly gave a small cheer and encouraged you to get ready, and to take your time. you spent the next ten minutes asking them what you should wear, going through your side of the closet. all three of you agreed on a plaid skirt you had bought a few weeks before on a spontaneous shopping trip. you only wore it once since then and had been meaning to pull it out again. you paired it with a sweater, something easy to keep you warm through the night instead of bringing a jacket along. lina and melly agreed excitedly when you changed and raised your eyebrows, searching for approval.

9 p.m.

holding on tightly to lina’s hand, you laughed hysterically to the point of tears and a clear indicator in the nether region that you had to pee, badly. a connie bailey rae cover was playing from a speaker near you, your laughter probably not as loud as you thought it to be as you calmed down. melly stopped her ridiculous reenactment and pulled an exaggerated disgusted face as she dodged someone trying to dance with her. you shook with laughter and took a long sip of your drink, tilting your head back to finish it in one gulp.

the party had been way more fun than you thought it would be, especially when you walked the four blocks to get there. lucky for you, you had been smart and worn flat boots. the apartment was a good size for the event and had plenty of space to gather, enough left over for those that wanted a break from either dancing or just to relax. some people you didn’t recognize had the large tv on, a video game on the bright screen. there was plenty of shouting coming from their general direction, a wave of arms and pointing of rigid fingers.

you had seen rafe in passing, but never made the initial eye contact as if to let each other know that you were near. stepping into the apartment and being greeted with his friend topper, you felt like you were intruding or trespassing by being in rafe’s space. you didn’t know him, or topper for that matter, and it felt odd to you to be in their physical home.

“where’s the bathroom?” you asked lina as melly went to get more snacks.

lina stood up on her toes and pointed at a closed door. “i'm pretty positive it’s over there.”

you gave her a nod and walked in the direction she pointed you in, finding a couple people waiting against the wall. you took a place there and acted as a fly on the wall for a total of five minutes since the line went fast. once inside, you took a deep breath, feeling refreshed at the open window and the cool air coming in.

you dried your hands and placed the towel back where it was on the counter and opened the door. the next person waiting rushed in rather quickly, making you stumble against the doorway. you laughed to yourself and felt the rush of sudden wind as the door slammed.

excusing yourself past a small group, you headed toward the refreshments. you were already thirsty after having emptied your bladder seconds before, but you were aware it was just the addictive alcohol buzzing through your system. it was crowded closer to the drinks, rightfully so, and it only took one person to move for you to see rafe acting as a stand-in bartender.

part of you wanted to run right back out of the kitchen and find lina and melly, but the other part of you wanted to give a swift kick to your rear. you chose the latter and walked over to where he was at the counter. he was in the middle of pouring someone else’s drink and you stood on his other side, taking in his appearance while you still could. the blue hat on his head read “obx”, turned backwards. he wore an off-white t-shirt, the graphic design on the back drawing you in. you were too busy staring at his shoulders molded with the fabric to realize he had turned around and you were now staring at his chest. you blinked up at his face, smiling lightly.

“hi.” he said, a small lilt to his voice as he recognized you once again.

“hi.”

“can i get you something?” he asked, and you felt your shoulders falter a little, thinking that was all he was going to say to you. stick to his image of drink tender and have you go on your way. but his body told you differently as he turned fully to face you.

“um, i can get it.” you said, the instant flight taking effect at the very prospect of being shot down.

rafe nodded and stepped out of the way, moving further into the corner of the counter. you smiled at him and poured your own drink, mixing up your favorite. rafe still stood there and you could feel the strong vice his eyes had on you. it made you a little self-conscious, but you relaxed with a deep breath.

“i never got your name.” rafe said just as you took a sip and turned to leave the kitchen. “you know, from the other day.”

“that’s because i was too busy bumping into you.” you let out a small laugh and stepped closer to him, out of the way if someone wanted a drink. you turned your back to the fridge and tried to find a spot to lean on as rafe looked down at you, a smile playing at his lips. “i am sorry about that again. i was in a rush for a class.”

“it’s no problem. i’m just glad you’re okay, we hit pretty hard.”

“y/n.” you said and held out a hand respectfully.

“rafe,” he slipped his hand into yours, warm and strong, and smiled widely.

“i think i’ve heard your name only a million times in the past week.” you admitted, knowing that lina and melly would kill for brownie points. “my friends are a bit obsessed with you and fully willing to educate the newbie.”

“obsessed, huh? lina and mel, right?”

you nodded and took another sip. rafe reached on the counter and grabbed a handful of pretzels. he held some out to you. “they’re nice girls,” rafe said easily. “i’ve hung out with them a couple times, but i didn’t know they were obsessed.” he laughed to himself.

you munched on a pretzel and froze at an idea. “you’re not going to tell them i told you, are you?”

“not unless you want me to.”

you stared at him for a bit longer than you planned, then let out a breath and took another pretzel from his hand. it was odd to be sharing food with him when just the other day you felt like your heart was tearing in your chest. at the moment, you could only feel a dull ache.

“so, how do you like it?” rafe asked.

“like what?”

“campus, the college.”

you nodded and swallowed some of your drink to wash the pretzels down. “things have been really great. i enjoy it here. it’s an immense difference than my first college back home, so i’m happy.”

rafe smiled. “and the party?”

you followed his nod to the people around you, glancing to your original spot where you left lina. you didn’t see her anywhere until some people moved and you found her and melly sat on the couch. they were playing the video game with a whole mess of guys. you grinned.

“the party is great.” you commended, looking back at him. he had finished the rest of the pretzels in his hand.

“good.” he nodded. “i always get nervous when top and i invite people over. we’ve done it a bunch of times, but there’s always the possibility of something going wrong.”

“well, you’re doing great. both of you. hopefully, nothing horrible happens.”

11 p.m.

you would be lying if you said that your conversation with rafe from hours ago wasn’t still running through your head. it was difficult not to think about it when you kept seeing him more often throughout the party. most of the time you’d catch his eye, or vice versa, and instantly smile. you’d then recall the sound of his laugh and would even hear it from feet away. the clenching in your chest was now accompanied by a swirling in your stomach.

you were pacing yourself with your drinks, but by now you were on your fifth of the night. you were completely aware of everything around you and you were enjoying the ongoing buzz. lina and melly were a bit more inebriated than you were, which only added to the fun.

the two girls in front of you were swaying to a song together, not even close to being slow tempo. it was very upbeat, the bass pumping through the walls. the front door to the apartment was now open since it had begun to get warmer with the more and more people that were joining. a few windows were thrown open as well.

“you remember how in freshman year you fell down that flight of stairs and twisted your ankle and practically bashed your head in and then your mom yelled at you and then your sister called to tell you she was pregnant and then your dad! oh my god, and then your dad was like ‘hey i’m thinking of leaving your mom so uh, yeah’ and then your mom was so pissed but then she was fine because she found a total hunk of a man to replace your dad like that,” melly snapped her fingers as your body started to shake with laughter. lina was laughing too, not at all bothered with a quick recap of her, very shitty, first year.

“yes, thank you for reminding me mel. i love when we have tantalizing conversation like this.” lina leaned her head against the others’.

mel giggled, a few hiccups escaping. “i think i need to pee.”

“god, you’re like a peeing machine.” lina sighed and tightened her arm around melly.

“that’s what drinking will do to you.”

lina rolled her eyes and looked at you as she brought melly to the bathroom. you asked quickly if she needed help, but she shook her head and promised they’d be back soon. you watched them go then turned back to the party, turning too fast and not feeling the presence behind you in the moment. a cool liquid pooled over and down your chest, soaking the fabric of your sweater. you gasped at the contact, your mouth dropping open and looking down at the dark stain.

“i— “ you looked up to tell the person it was fine before an apology came out, finding that off-white t-shirt on a very familiar blue-eyed person. “we have to stop meeting like this.”

rafe looked horrified at having spilled his drink all over your sweater, his eyes wide as they stared at your chest.

“that’s the most cliché thing to say.” you said, laughing lightly to ease the tension so obvious in his features.

he let out a laugh too. “you can borrow something of mine. come on,” he held out his hand and you took it willingly, realizing some people were staring at the accident way too curiously. you let rafe lead you up the stairs, the complete darkness on the landing causing you to focus solely on his hand in yours.

rafe opened a door and flipped a light on, your eyes adjusting to the brightness. he led you further in and closed the door behind you before rushing to his dresser, a whole display of cologne bottles on top. as he rummaged through the drawers, you stood just in front of the door, a little timid to step further in. you were holding your sweater away from your chest, already feeling the stickiness of liquid on your skin.

“how’s this one?” he asked, holding out a simple white one.

“you don’t have to give me a shirt.”

“it’s the least i can do. the bathroom is right there.” he handed the shirt to you and nodded just behind your shoulder. you thanked him and went in, closing the door with a click. you pulled the sweater off and dampened a washcloth, wiping the dried drink from your skin. pulling the shirt on, you relished in how soft it was and styled the piece of fabric so it looked better with your skirt.

rafe was sitting on a couch next to his bed, more like a futon, his hands in his pockets and hat off his head. he looked up as you came out, straightening his posture and looking you up and down.

“i’m sorry.” he smiled guiltily.

you smiled and walked over, moving around the small circular coffee table and sitting next to him. “guess it was payback for the other day,” you teased as you folded your sweater and set it next to you.

rafe rolled his eyes with a knowing smile. you glanced at him as you leaned back, feeling the softness and rigidness of the futon. “you look good in my shirt.”

“i feel better in a less damp one.” you said, easing the fluttering in your stomach. your chest clenched again as you crossed your legs.

glancing around rafe’s room, you admired the movie posters on the walls and the multiple lacrosse paraphernalia. one of his jerseys lay crumpled at the end of his bed, the comforter pulled over the pillows to look made. it was better than you did with your bed, you were pretty sure yours was unmade and messy.

it was a decent sized room, plus the bathroom was nice to have. you’d kill for your own bathroom again. it would be nice not to wait in a line. you told yourself that you just had to figure out an earlier schedule so you could beat the crowd.

after a once-over of rafe’s room, you looked over at him to find him already looking at you. he was fully analyzing your face, you could see his eyes flickering to different parts.

you swallowed and licked your lips. “what?”

“nothing.” he said quickly and sighed, laying his head back on the couch.

you squinted at him, now tracing over his features. he looked nervous from what you could tell, his hands moving in his pockets. you stared at his chest moving up and down slowly, the intake of breath coming as it grew bigger. his adam’s apple protruded, bobbing slightly as he swallowed. your chest clenched once again as you looked at his face, watching him look up at the ceiling. he really was handsome. you shifted in your seat, switching your leg over the other.

“that look wasn’t nothing.” you commented, breathing in.

“what look?” he turned his head toward you, eyebrows slightly pushing together. you watched every change in his face, from his eyebrows to his eyes blinking then to his tongue peeking out to lick his lips.

“the look of ‘i want to eat you up’.”

he laughed, the couch shaking with him. “what does that entail?”

“major gazing and bedroom eyes.”

“bedroom eyes, huh?” he hummed and lifted his head. his lips tugged at a smirk.

“am i imagining things?” you asked seriously, slightly doubting if you made the right call. maybe he wasn’t thinking what you thought he had been. maybe you were imagining things.

rafe didn’t answer, instead looking down at the floor. the smirk alone told you that you had been right. his hands flexed in his pockets, hard for you to miss. a few silent minutes passed, the both of you listening to the party still going on downstairs.

“if you want to kiss me, all you have to do is ask.” you said quietly. after a moment you figured he hadn’t heard you, that he had lost himself in staring at the carpet.

“can i?”

“yes,” you nodded.

rafe sat up and met your eyes, moving closer until his thigh was touching yours. you shifted your upper half closer to him, feeling a wave of shivers run through you the second his hand touched your cheek. you instinctively pressed your legs tighter together as your heartbeat picked up and rafe lowered over you, licking his lips once more. they were soft and firm, just as they needed to be. he tilted your chin up, his thumb brushing just beside your mouth as you kissed.

seconds later, you brought your own hands to his face. you were eager to touch him, to feel the solidness of him against you. it was mostly a reassurance that this was in fact happening and that you weren’t dreaming. you pushed a hand into his hair just behind his ear and mirrored the last few pecks he was leaving you before he fully pulled away. you felt a pinch of disappointment, the small taste for him now growing bigger. you had to stop your hands from pulling him back.

he pulled away only a little and you opened your eyes to see him still so close and looking over your face. your breaths mingled together.

“what?” you huffed, letting your head fall back for a second in slight irritation. you just wanted to kiss him again. you let your hand slide down from his hair, resting near his shoulder. you wanted to squeeze the muscle under your hand.

“nothing.” he said again, eyes flickering down to your lips once more. he smiled, holding himself up on the back of the couch. his thumb brushed the same spot on your cheek. “don’t tell anyone, but i’ve been imagining this since you showed up tonight.”

you returned your hand to his hair, slightly scratching with a smile. “i knew you spilled your drink on purpose.”

rafe grinned widely and moved back into you. this kiss was deeper, your lips opening for him when you felt his tongue. his hand left your cheek and appeared on your hip, ever so slightly pushing your shirt up so he could touch your skin at your waist. you smiled against him as you felt his hand slowly creep up the shirt. you were reminded again that it was his and you pulled him closer by the back of the neck, hearing a soft moan leave his lips. your thighs squeezed, your excitement starting to rise.

“you just gave it to me and now you want to take it off?” you teased as rafe’s hand covered one of your breasts, the cool air of the room reaching your skin. rafe smiled and kissed you again.

his hand disappeared, apparently changing his mind, and reappeared on your thigh. you breathed in sharply at the warmth coming from his palm, resting just above your knee. your brain started to spaz for a moment and you imagined a bunch of smaller yous, running in circles like their heads were cut off.

rafe’s hand stayed steady as you uncrossed your legs, a silent invitation. he moved to kiss the corner of your mouth. “is this okay?”

the fact that he was pulling away multiple times to check in on you had to be evidence enough of why lina and melly liked him so much. you hadn’t met many guys that were so in tune with consent or caring about what you wanted. it turned you on seeing it coming from him.

“yes.” you nodded as you touched his forearm, not wanting to seem too eager.

you anticipated his hand moving and when it did, you held back the moan. you were much too eager for teasing and he was showing no signs of not giving you want you wanted. as he got closer to you, you placed your hand over his. he pulled you back for a kiss and you decided to focus on that for a moment to lessen your nerves.

his touch was soft once he met your underwear. his fingers pressed over you and you shivered from how wet you had become because of him. he hummed into your mouth, only adding to the pooling between your legs. his hand reached back and pushed your skirt further up so he could get to you more easily.

you let out a satisfied sigh against his lips as he ran a finger through your folds, collecting your wetness. your underwear had been pushed to the side, out of the way, finally feeling his touch.

“are you this wet for me?” he asked. you nodded against his forehead and pulled him back, letting out a moan as he brushed over your clit. it was only for a second, but you were about ready to burst.

you opened your legs wider for rafe, his fingers moving over you and exploring the new area. you gripped his hand to silently ask him for more along with an impatient moan. you wanted his fingers so badly in places you weren’t ready to admit yet. he wanted the opposite.

“talk to me.” he said, nudging the side of your face with his nose, planting a kiss to your jaw. you opened your eyes that had fallen shut, your breath getting heavier. your chest felt like it was going to cave in.

“please,” you said, adjusting your hips. “please, touch me.”

“i am.” he pulled away, a menacing smirk on his face just to gauge your reaction.

you huffed out and pulled his hand closer. “you know what i mean, rafe.”

“i like when you say my name.” he pressed a kiss to your lips sweetly.

“i might like when you touch me, so get on with it already.”

rafe laughed huskily, his breath blowing over your face. “you want my fingers?”

you wanted to roll your eyes at how badly he wanted you to beg, but you wanted his fingers more. “yes, please. i want your fingers. give me something.”

you let go of his hand as he finally pushed a finger into you. you adjusted around him for a moment and felt the need to close your legs to keep him there. he pulled your lips back to his, his tongue quick to lick into you. you held his face again as his finger started to move inside of you.

“you want another, pretty girl?” he asked after a few moments passed. you nodded again, breathing hoarsely, too intoxicated in him to speak. a second finger pushed into you then, stretching you ever so slightly. you sighed, letting your head fall back to the couch.

“you’re so wet.” he said as he moved his fingers, delighting in the sounds he was making with you in the palm of his hand. “you’re taking my fingers so well, y/n. do they feel good?”

you moaned as he said your name for the first time. it was something you didn’t think you’d like so much, but with the current situation, it was wonderful.

rafe’s lips appeared on your neck. you held the back of his head as he pressed a few kisses then closed his lips over a spot closer to your collarbone. if your breath had been short then, it was even shorter now as he worked to leave a mark on you. with all the attention you were getting, it only brought you closer to your release, and you started to move your hips. he freed your skin, startled at your movements, then amazed as he watched you chase his fingers. the spot he left throbbed now, all your blood rushing to two places at once.

“are you going to come?” he asked as you heard the start of song you had been replaying for the past few weeks. it was muffled and you could barely hear the words, but you knew it by heart.

“yes, fuck.” you looked up at him, taking in the sight. he was breathing over you, his eyes never straying too far from yours as your mouth opened in pleasure. “rafe, make me come.”

you squeezed your eyes shut as he kissed you hard, breathing deeply into your mouth. he reached his thumb to your clit and began to draw circles at a normal pace with his fingers. your stomach started to twist, the familiar feeling forming fast as he picked up the pace. he could tell you were close by the sheer dig of your fingertips on the back of his neck. it only edged him on more to bring you to your climax.

“come on my fingers.” he said, eyes half closed as he looked at you, lips brushing over yours as he spoke. you whimpered and felt your hips twitch before stilling completely, trapping rafe’s hand between your legs, as you came undone. his thumb continued to move to help you through it. your jaw went slack, eyes rolling under your eyelids, as you moaned loudly. you felt an overwhelming sense of content, the adrenaline rush coming and going quickly.

your blood pumped in your ears and it took you a few moments to register rafe giving you subtle kisses all over the underside of your jaw. you breathed in shakily and let your head fall back on the couch, your knees separating. rafe took his hand away and you winced as he did. you already missed the contact.

the moment was completely ruined as his name was called up the stairs. rafe’s lips disappeared from you as he looked toward the door. you didn’t know what came over you as you pulled your skirt down over your thighs, the footsteps heavy outside his door before a couple of his friends burst in.

“guys, come on. get the fuck out!” he shouted in annoyance, sitting up completely, his leg still touching yours.

“woah, sorry.” they said as they took in your presence. you shifted and knew that they could probably tell what you and rafe had been doing. they evidently didn’t care as they went into a whole spiel of something that had taken place downstairs. rafe tried to stop them and their alcohol-induced exuberance.

he looked at you over his shoulder, touching you lightly on the knee. “i'm sorry.” he said, his friends not hearing as they talked to one another. “i'll see you downstairs?”

part of you felt completely stupid when he said it, like everything that had happened moments ago was just an imagination. you felt your shoulders slump, but you nodded and got up anyways. the door was quick to close behind you and you were left in the dark landing, leaning against the wall to catch your breath. you smoothed your hair, took a deep breath, and fixed your underwear and skirt again.

your eyes adjusted gradually as you went down the stairs back into the swing of things. you swallowed, your mouth still dry post-climax. you went into the kitchen and filled up a cup with water, downing it slowly and stepping out of the way of some people. you couldn’t help but feel drained as you watched the people around you, laughing, dancing, and drinking. you had just spent the last 30 minutes in rafe cameron’s room and now you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

“y/n!” you looked up at melly coming toward you, her makeup slightly smudged, but that didn’t change how great she looked. “there you are!”

you gave her an assured smile and finished the water in your cup. “hey.” you tried not to let anything show.

“lina and i are ready to go if you want to come with. i think we’re going to get some food somewhere in town. i was thinking curly fries or a veggie burger. lina is dying for— wait, where did you go? we looked everywhere.” her expression suddenly changed to one of concern as she stepped closer to you.

“i— uh, well clearly not everywhere.” you said shamelessly, feeling your neck grow warm.

melly opened her mouth to say something then stopped. “oh my god, why are you so flushed? what happened to your sweater?” she looked at the shirt, her eyes catching on something near your collarbone. her eyes went wide as you tried to hide the mark. “oh my god!”

monday, 4 p.m.

“i was thinking that it could go more like this,” your friend said as she pressed a few buttons on her laptop. a new beat started from the computer, the screen following along with the track. you bobbed your head along with the beat.

the campus coffeeshop was somewhere you liked to go, mostly to meet your friends, but you also enjoyed the coffee. sometimes before class you’d make it just in time to get an extra scone before they were all gone. it was a cozy place too, filled with older antiques and an endless display of guitars on every wall. sometimes they’d have an open mic for students, letting anyone with any sort of musical or comical talent perform. most of the acts were later in the week though so no one had to worry about coursework.

after your classes today, you had met up with a friend you hadn’t seen in a while. she was eager to show you what she had been working on for her musical composition classes and you had expressed that you were willing to listen.

the past weekend had been spent mulling over a certain party and a certain someone you couldn’t seem to forget. not that you tried to, to be fair. you’d hadn’t seen him since, which was nothing new given the amount of times you had encountered the boy since that day on campus or seen him for the first time in the library. you didn’t find things weird, but things were left upspoken and it had been bothering you. you knew that melly or lina could’ve easily gotten his number for you, had you asked, but you couldn’t bring yourself to, nor did you know what you would say. all you could do was hope that he was doing well and maybe, perhaps, thinking of you too.

it was inevitable to escape having to talk about what happened in rafe’s room with melly and lina. you weren’t willing to share all of the details right down to what he smelled like, but you didn’t deny that nothing occurred. they seemed satisfied when you recounted having to change your sweater and rafe being kind enough to offer you one of his shirts.

speaking of the shirt, you had gone to your dorm that night and taken it off, seeing that “cameron” was written on the back, along with a large number. no doubt it was for lacrosse. the prospect of it made you shiver before folding it up to leave on your desk. you hadn’t touched it since.

“christ, i've got a meeting with my advisor soon.” your friend said, quickly exiting the program on her screen and closing her computer. “thank you again so much for listening. i can’t express how relieving it is to have someone do this.”

you waved her off with a sweet smile and packed up your own things. “i'm always around if you need a first-time listener.”

both of you stood and pushed the metal chairs in. you followed her to the exit, listening to her as she explained the reasoning for her upcoming meeting. both doors opened, the one from her pushing and the other from rafe coming in. you looked up as he met your eyes, and you couldn’t deny how good it was to see him.

“hey,” he smiled at you as all three of you paused.

before you could say anything, the words sticking to your tongue, you looked back to your friend. she was looking between the both of you, unsure of what was going on. you swallowed and acknowledged her. “i’ll see you later?”

a small smile came onto her face as she looked at rafe then back to you and nodded. the door closed softly behind her. you looked back at rafe as you felt his hand ghosting over your forearm.

“hi,” you said finally.

“it’s good to see you. come up with me?” he gestured to the register and you nodded, letting him take your hand. you didn’t think too much of it as you stood alongside him as he ordered. when the cashier asked if there would be anything else, rafe looked at you expectantly. you blanked for a second, remembering that you didn’t get a drink earlier when you first arrived. you had immediately gone for a sandwich, satisfied that that would be your dinner.

rafe pulled out his wallet and paid for the two drinks. he then led you toward the pick-up counter and faced you with a soft smile. “how have you been?”

“okay,” you breathed in deeply. you weren’t exactly sure how to answer. were you supposed to tell him how freaked out you had been? no, you decided, best not to. “the weekend was busy.”

“mine too. i've got practice tonight so i thought i’d stop by for some energy. i’m glad i ran into you.”

you refrained from asking him if he was serious. you could see on his face that he was with the way he looked at you. “rafe—”

before you could say much of anything else, rafe’s hands appeared on your cheeks and his lips pressed to yours. you kissed him back just as gently even though you wanted to do more now that you felt him again. he pulled away as his order was called, turning to thank the barista as he took the two cups.

“come to my place to study? after practice, i mean.” he said as he held your cup out to you. you looked at it then back up at his questioning eyes, a sliver of hope in them. you pushed down the question at the tip of your tongue and accepted the coffee.

“we’re just studying?”

rafe beamed and nodded. “i have a huge test tomorrow that i can’t fail, so yes.”

7 p.m.

before parting ways with rafe earlier he had finally taken your phone and put his number in it, but not before taking an odd photo of himself. it made you laugh watching it happen though. he promised that he would be done with practice around now and you left your dorm a little earlier than you planned to. it was out of pure thrill really.

knocking on the front door, you waited patiently for it to be answered. you shifted the books in your arms as you heard soft footsteps behind the door. rafe opened it, standing in loose-fitting clothes with damp hair. he smiled instantly and welcomed you in.

it was a drastic difference compared to the party. the house was eerily quiet, so quiet you could hear a pin drop. rafe turned to you from the door.

“how many books did you bring?” he asked seriously, glancing at them against your chest.

“just two,” you said defensively only until you saw the grin. you rolled your eyes and turned away from him to kick your shoes off.

he was chuckling to himself as he went into the kitchen and pulled out snacks to have. “do you want anything to drink?”

“water would be great.”

“smart choice. less sticky.” he said, his back to you, but you could hear the satisfied tone of his voice at his remark.

once he gathered drinks and a plate of snacks, he led you upstairs. it was brighter this time with his door already open and lights already on. you glanced at the other closed one down the short hall, finding the sliver underneath completely dark. maybe topper wasn’t home.

“how was practice?” you asked, setting your things down. he placed the plate on the coffee table and took a seat on the floor. you brushed your hair away from your face and sat down beside him.

“good. just ran some drills, normal practice stuff.” he shrugged, munching on a chip.

“is topper not home?” you set your books on the table and opened them up to where you had marked. rafe moved to grab his things from his bag sitting on the couch. he copied your actions and pulled out a pencil and a notebook.

“no, he went out with some of the guys for food.” he said easily, opening to a blank page. you watched curiously as he wrote down the topic he was studying for.

both of you fell into a silence as you started to read from your books. you were worried about it being a strange silence, knowing what happened the last time you were in this room. it was fairly difficult to push it out of your mind and to focus when rafe was right next to you, so close, along with the thoughts and memory of his touch. you pushed everything out of your head and concentrated back on the page you were reading from.

it wasn’t long when rafe’s hand appeared on your bent leg. they were crossed under you and he had placed his hand like it belonged over the side of your knee. you looked at him in your peripheral but didn’t see him look up once to acknowledge that he had in fact done that. instead you let it happen, ignoring the way it warmed up your skin. you swallowed in anticipation of him interrupting your studying session to turn it into a quick make out session, but the longer the minutes passed the longer his hand stayed where it was. after a while, you forgot about it.

if you had taken one look at rafe, with no prior knowledge of him or of the way his hands felt on you, you would have never guessed that he becomes so engrossed in studying. for the whole two hours that you both spent together with your noses in textbooks, he hadn’t once started a conversation. he kept at reading and writing, jotting things down in his notebook, while you held your head above your own book and soaked up every last word. it was comforting knowing that. the plate had even emptied, mostly due to rafe’s insatiable appetite after practice. you weren’t that hungry from your sandwich earlier.

“okay, that’s it.” rafe said abruptly, causing you to look up as his hand left your knee. “my eyes are going to bleed if i read anymore.”

you laughed lightly and looked back at your book. “are you sure you studied enough?”

“i wrote a whole ten pages worth of notes.” he flipped through them, the pages brushing together.

you hummed, still engrossed in your text. rafe shuffled next to you, dropping his notebook over the open pages along with his pencil. he let out a long sigh which turned into a yawn.

“are you done?” he asked innocently, his head appearing on your shoulder.

you glanced at him and shrugged him off with a smile. “maybe.”

“come on,” he groaned and reached for your textbook. you automatically smacked his hand away. he laughed and quickly flipped it closed and took ahold of your chin to face him.

“that was a dick move.” you said, punching him softly on the arm.

“pay attention to me.” he whined, letting go of your chin only to touch your cheek.

you eyed him as he came closer, finally kissing you when you didn’t punch him again or push him away. you kissed him back as best you could with the speculation seeping into your brain then. rafe seemed to be able to tell.

“what is it?” he asked when he pulled away, running his thumb lightly along your cheekbone. it was reassuring almost.

you looked at him, trying to think of the best way to phrase it. you also thought about how badly it could go given the answer you were dreading. “i'm just— it’s nothing.” you shook your head quickly and leaned in to distract him with another kiss.

he reciprocated for only a moment. “what is it? you can tell me.”

“i guess i'm just wondering what we’re doing.” you rolled your shoulder as if you had a knot, pulling away from rafe in case he didn’t want to touch you. his hand fell from your face and he leaned his side against the couch.

“what do you want to do?”

you gave him a serious glare. “don’t make this a game, rafe. i'm just…wondering what your intentions are.”

rafe adjusted his posture and sat up straighter, all his attention on you. his eyebrows creased and you bit the inside of your lip self-consciously, knowing this wasn’t going to go how you wanted it.

“well, i'm enjoying spending time with you.”

“studying?” you asked with a monotone.

rafe glanced away from you as if he were wondering if he said the wrong thing. “yeah. is that so hard to believe?”

you wanted to huff again, but you held the breath in. your shoulders started to tense as you became frustrated. not because of him, mostly because of yourself for not being able to communicate. you felt stupid for asking it, but you did. “do you like kissing me?”

“of course i do.”

“is that all you want to do?” you finally asked, quickly looking away from him. you reached toward your textbook, fiddling with the pages.

“no,” rafe said. “i want to get to know you.”

it was hard for you not to roll your eyes. rafe noticed and a second later his hand touched your shoulder, gently shaking it.

“i'm serious. hey, look at me.” he pleaded, and you did. “i want to get to know you, but only if you’ll let me. i know the other night was weird and i don’t know— spontaneous, but i enjoyed it and i enjoy being around you. you’re not the only one who’s been thinking about it.”

“i’ve probably been thinking about it more than you.” you chided in a quiet voice, trying to tease him. you were pleased by the answer he gave you and you felt a little silly for being so stubborn at first.

rafe smiled slightly, eyes soft. “let’s just keep doing what we’re doing and see where it goes, okay?”

you took a deep breath in, pushing your book away and nodding. “okay.”

rafe’s hand rubbed your shoulder comfortingly before he pulled you in for an awkwardly placed hug. the side of your body fell into his chest, but he hugged you, nonetheless, pressing a quick kiss to the crown of your head. you turned into him and smiled widely, your cheeks strained to hold it, and hugged him around the shoulders.

all the time spent worrying about whether he reciprocated your feelings or thoughts were so obviously wasted as you spent the rest of the night together. you took it slow, never straying from innocent kisses as you curled up together to watch a movie. you couldn’t help grinning multiple times throughout the night, knowing that things wouldn’t be difficult like you thought. it was easy when you expressed yourself and talked things over, even mentioning small things made a difference. maybe this would turn out to be another smart decision. you had a feeling there were plenty of possibilities with rafe cameron, but only time would tell.

[inkandpen22]

Young Hearts Divided (3/?)

Pairing: Sirius Black x Female!Reader / James Potter x Female!Reader 

Warnings: none 

Word Count: 2.3k 

Part Summary: As James and Sirius continue to act strangely, Y/N struggles to figure out the reason. When James asks her to do something, the pieces start to fall into place, leaving her even more confused than before. 

Masterlist

James and I study for History of Magic all afternoon following copying Lily’s notes. James is lucky I actually understand History, otherwise, we’d both be in trouble. As I go over the chapter with him, he takes notes for the first time on this portion of the book. During class, he’s usually sleeping or doodling. It’s rather distracting being his seat partner, especially when he asks me to play Tic-Tac-Toe with him. One of us has to pay attention because we can depend on Lily to cover us. 

“What led to the Goblin Rebellion of 1612?” I quiz James. 

He taps his chin with a quill, thinking up an answer. After it takes longer than it should, I lean back in my chair with a raised brow. Unable to withhold my amusement, I snicker at my struggling friend. He’s toast, this exam is going to wreck his marks. 

He whines, reaching across the table to gently grab my arm pleadingly. “Help me!” 

I giggle, sliding my book toward him. “Read up. You’re going to need it!” 

He whines some more, childishly pouting. “But I hate reading,” he groans, tossing his head back. As an idea pops into his head, he perks up, “summarize it for me?” 

I open my mouth to protest, unsure if I’ll do it justice, but James cuts me off eagerly. 

“I’ll make it up to you!” He insists. “I’ll… I’ll…” he struggles to think up compensation. Then, he snaps his fingers, pointing at me as another apparently brilliant thought crosses his mind. “I’ll take you to Hogsmeade this weekend!” 

“See! You already got a part of it,” I point out, ignoring his silly offer as I bring my textbook back to me considering he’s clearly not going to use it. “Hogsmeade is where the rebellion occurred! Tell me more.” 

He rolls his eyes at my seriousness, a hint of a smirk on the edge of his lips. Leaning forward, he crosses his arms on the table between us. “I’m serious Y/N,” he whispers so Professor Pince doesn’t shush us. “Let’s go to Hogsmeade this weekend.” 

Our group has never missed a Hogsmeade weekend. Any excuse to mess around drunk off firewhiskey and butterbeer is our preferred free time activity. Except for Lily and Remus, they play the parents. 

“James… everyone is going there this weekend…” I state a matter-of-factly with amusement before turning to write down in my notebook. 

“No, I mean….” he pauses, licking his lips nervously as he avoids my eyes. Evidently, he’s unsure of his words. 

I place my quill down, his hesitation earning my attention. It’s not like James to sound so anxious. What is wrong with everyone today? Did someone pour a spell in their pumpkin juice at breakfast today? It was probably a short term spell from Malfoy or Snape, a payback prank. I guess it’s a good thing I slept in. 

“James,” I place my hand on his comfortingly. His eyes break away from the space between us and meet mine with amazement. “It’s okay,” I laugh softly. “You can say anything to me, safe space here.” I wave my finger in a circle to gesture to our table. 

He laughs, nodding his head in understanding. “Yeah, yeah, you’re right…. I know. You’ve always been really easy to talk to Y/N. Uh, which is somewhat why I wanted to… um… ask you to Hogsmeade… You know, to go to Hogsmeade with me,” he stammers nervously, combing his fingers through his hair with his free hand. 

“Go with you as you go on your date?” I seek to clarify, still kind of lost in translation. 

He narrows his eyes, somewhat confused himself. “Yes…” he answers, making it sound more like a question. 

I nod at a steady pace, processing his words. Okay, well, this day has been anything but average. It’s not even supper time and already two Marauders have suddenly expressed interest in me. One minute, we’re all just friends and the next two of the most infamous playboys at Hogwarts are claiming to have feelings for me. I swear to Godrick Gryffindor if Peter or Remus stop me in the hall to confess their love I’m packing my things and going into hiding. Plus, I could’ve sworn James was head over heels in love with Lily? He told me so multiple times. Whenever he gets drunk we have a heart-to-heart about it. He asks me for advice and I assure him to be himself. Could his feelings have changed without me noticing? It’s hard to believe, but not impossible I suppose. 

Not wanting to hurt him, I accept the offer, “Yeah, yeah sounds good.” 

He smiles brightly, enthused by my answer. “Okay, um yeah, cool!” 

What harm could it do? I’m sure nothing will come from it anyway, James is pretty filthy with his affections. He’s been claiming to be in love with Lily since First Year but has dated girls since them. I’m sure I would even call it dating, they were more like flings here and there. I suspect James might just be confused or annoyed with Lily not reciprocating his affections, so he’s looking to me for some guidance. I don’t mind helping my friend figure out what he wants, as long as he doesn’t act irrationally. 

One problem though, how is Sirius going to react? We aren’t exactly together, but we can’t ignore what occurred at the lake today. He’ll be with us at Hogsmeade, we always go together as a group. I hold the necklace that Sirius gave me between my fingers without James noticing. What a confusing chain of events. I’m not sure what to think. I’m not sure what either of their intentions is. I never thought any of this would ever happen. I wonder if Sirius’s outburst during lunch has something to do with James’s offer? The two seemed rather harsh with each other. James clearly knew that Sirius and I were down at the lake considering he was next to Sirius in Potions and likely read the correspondence as Marlene did. My next thoughts are: how much does he know? Does he know what Sirius said? Does he know what he gave me? If so, does that have anything to do with him asking me to Hogsmeade? Is it all a competition with him? I’m utterly lost and all I can do is see how it pans out. I don’t want to shout accusations and end up hurting someone by accident. It’s odd, I’m both looking forward to this weekend and somewhat dreading it.

James and I decide to skip dinner, staying at the library to cram for History after James gets a sudden urge to study. James finishes telling me a humorous story about his family’s vacation many years ago when we returned to the tower after sundown. 

“My dad was soaked-” He describes with amusement. 

“Password?” The Fat Lady interrupts as we approach. 

“magia enim quisque est,” James answers, not missing a beat. He doesn’t even glance at the portrait. The Fat Lady swings open, revealing the passageway as James continues his story. “I thought my mom was going to topple over, she was laughing so hard!” 

I cover my mouth, laughing at James’s words. I’ve never had the privilege of meeting the Potters like some of the others. They sound like really fun from what I’ve heard from James and Sirius. 

Our friends are gathered in front of the fire. The fire is the main source of light in the room other than some weak candlesticks on the walls. Peter and Remus in opposite armchairs, with Lily sitting on the floor resting against Remus’s seat. Marlene is sitting on the floor directly in front of the fireplace, playing cards with Lily on the coffee table. Sirius sits at the far end of the couch, appearing to be venting to Remus. Everyone’s attention turns us when they hear us appearing in the Common Room. James and I stop, our shared laughter settling down as we peer at our friends. 

“You two were busy,” Marlene remarks with a smirk as she lays down a card on the table. 

“Yeah, you missed dinner,” Peter reminds us, sounding rather distressed by the idea. 

“Eh,” James shrugs, not too fazed by the matter. He presses his hand to my back, guiding me to sit on the couch with him. 

I follow his lead, not physically reacting to the presence of his hand through my mind is racing.

 “We can go grab something from the kitchens later,” he adds with a wink as grabs my waist to cross in front of me and sit in the middle, between me and Sirius. 

I blush, not used to receiving so much attention from James. I mean, I’ve known him since we were eleven so I’ve been the receiver of his relentless flirtatious personality, but now I’m starting to think it’s not unintentional. I ease down on the cushion, crisscrossing my legs comfortably. 

“You’re not allowed to do that,” Remus warns, knowing well enough that James won’t listen. “Unless you want another months’ detention.” 

James casually rests his arm on my leg as if he’s done it a thousand times before. Lily and Marlene silently look up from their cards, taking note of the action. They look between me and James’s arm as his thumb rubs against my knee. I share their looks of astonishment without the boys noticing as they’re too distracted by James and Remus going back and forth. I have no doubt this will be the hot topic when we head to bed. I exhale deeply, subconsciously picking at my nails, a nervous habit. 

“Did you hear what happened to that First Year in Herbology?” Lily is quick to change the subject. “Apparently a Slytherin boy fainted!” 

“Isn’t there a kid who faints every year on Mandrake day?” Marlene laughs, returning to their card game. 

“Not surprised it was a Slytherin,” James remarks mockingly with a chuckle. “They’re such pansies.” 

I frown at James’s words, my eyes focused on my lap. I have friends in Slytherin, they’re decent people. Granted, their house has a bad reputation, but that doesn’t mean they’re all bad. I have family members who were in Slytherin, they’re not evil or anything. Shoot, I could’ve been a Slytherin, the Sorting Hat debated on it. It saw motivation and cunningness in me, in fact, it nearly outweighed my Gryffindor qualities. 

“Forget that!” Peter nearly bursts with excitement in his chair next to me. “Did you hear about Snape?!” 

“Peter!” Lily snaps uncharacteristically at the boy. 

James and I jump slightly at the rudeness of Lily’s outburst, my hand gripping his on my knee instinctively. James glances down at my hand and I swiftly remove it. Peter cowers into his chair as though he was just reprimanded by a parent. My eyes flicker between the two, brows high like everyone else’s, except for James who continues to look at me admiringly. 

“What happened?” Sirius finally speaks, grumbling disinterestedly. Did he just miss Lily snapping? After that, he still has the guts to ask what happened? That’s bold. 

Lily glares at the jet black-haired boy. I lean forward peering in front of James to see Sirius’s reaction. He appears unfazed, slouching into the cushion beside James. His features are sharp, covered with evident frustration and annoyance. 

On that note, I think I’m going to excuse myself before things get too heated. Frankly, I don’t really care what happened with Snape. The boys obsess over picking on him and Lily worries for her childhood friend. Though I don’t condone bullying, I don’t care to get involved. I’m civil with both parties. 

“I’m going to head to bed,” I announce, already moving to stand up. 

Protests erupt amongst the group, each of them talking over each other. The only silent parties are James and Sirius. Sirius hadn’t reacted, starring ahead at the fire with a frown. 

James peers up at me with disappointed eyes, waiting for silence. “But I thought we were going to sneak down to the kitchens?” He pouts, holding my hand loosely. 

“And risk getting a detention?” I chuckle at the boy. 

“That didn’t seem to stop you this afternoon,” Sirius mumbles bitterly under his breath, not having the decency to look at me in the eye as does. 

James looks over his shoulder at his best friend. In unison, our friends begin to talk over each other again, this time exchanging their farewells and excuses for heading to bed. I’ve never seen Lily shove cards into their box so urgently before. I thought Remus was going to trip over himself, he leaped up so quickly from his seat. Now, the three of us are left alone in the Common Room. Sirius hasn’t even flinched once despite the chaos that just occurred around him. His eyes remain in narrow slits as they focus ahead on the burning fire. James burns holes into his friend, waiting for some sort of reaction. His hand continues to hold mine, it’s the only reason I’m still here. I would’ve safely run off with the others given the chance. I sort of feel like I’m rudely watching a private moment between best friends. Do I say something? In my defense, I wanted to leave before everyone else did. 

Building up the courage to break the silence, I slip my hand from James’s and stutter, “I’m gonna… I’m gonna go.” Hopefully, that won’t make either of them burst or something. Urgently, I pick up my books off the side table next to the couch. 

James and Sirius both snap their heads in my direction. Okay, not what I had hoped. I freeze, unsure of what to do or say. I have two pairs of eyes pouring into me. One pair black, the other hazel. I press my books to my chest nervously. 

Suddenly, the sound of the Fat Lady opening interrupts us. Professor McGonagall appears from the dark archway in her robe and cap. Her distraught expression makes my heart sink. James and Sirius both fly up from their seated positions behind me, sharing in my worry. Already predicting what this may be about, I’m too afraid to move.

__________________________________

Tags: @hannah220506​ @devilstradegy

Masterlist

[eyeofthedrgn]

A Heavy Battle Symphony - Chapter 4

New chapter! This chapter is slightly fluffy, still angsty, but much less than previous chapters.

Catch up here: Chapter 1 // Chapter 2 // Chapter 3

TW: language, mental abuse, verbal abuse, physical abuse, violence, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, self harm, self-esteem issues, sexual abuse (only alluded to briefly in future chapters), just a lot of trauma, angst, smut - lots of lovely gay smut

Word count: 1685

Chapter 4 - Forgotten

A little piece of paper with a picture drawn

Floats on down the street 'til the wind is gone

And the memory now is like the picture was then

When the paper's crumpled up it can't be perfect again

It was Monday, and he was healed enough that Maeve let him go to school. After a normal morning routine, Lorcan made sure he wore a hoodie that would do a decent job covering his neck. Hood up, hands in his hoodie pocket, head down, he headed to school.

He missed a lot of schoolwork. It was going to be a late night. Luckily, most of the teachers gave him until the end of the week to turn it in.

When P.E. came around, he went straight to the gym rather than the locker room. He found his teacher and handed him his doctor's note. Mr. Brullo sent Lorcan to the library to study. Lorcan was happy about that. He was able to catch up on some of his homework.

Lorcan's handwriting, luckily, wasn't hindered by his cast. Perrington at least broke his right arm, his non-dominant arm. That he was thankful for, if he could be thankful for anything that happened to him.

He was getting a headache from his pre-calc homework. Lorcan rubbed his face with his hand and sighed.

"Lorcan?"

Lorcan grunted and slowly turned to see Elide, who looked relieved to see him. That was interesting. "Oh, uh, hi."

"Aren't you supposed to be in gym?" Lorcan lifted his casted arm. Elide's eyes widened and her lips parted. "Oh." She swallowed. Fuck, here comes the pity. "How-" she closed her mouth. "How'd that happen? We thought you were sick." Why were they concerned?

He told the same story Maeve told the doctor. Something about getting in a fight and falling down stairs, and "you should see the other guy". She didn't seem to believe him, neither did the doctor.

"Can I sit with you?" Lorcan shrugged. She sat down and then proceeded to talk to him about what he missed in creative writing. He didn't realize her voice was so soothing.

"Has anyone signed your cast yet?" She was eyeing the black cast. "I have a silver Sharpie!" She pulled it out of her bag and held it up with a smile.

Lorcan huffed a small laugh. Not being able to say no to that smile, knowing he was going to get in trouble, well, what could really do to him anyway? So, Lorcan carefully pushed up his hoodie sleeve. She smiled brightly at him. He propped his head up on his hand, eyes closed and listened to her hum as she put ink to the black cast.

++++

It was hard to keep from asking Lorcan questions. Elide saw the handprint bruise on his neck, the exhaustion lining his body, and of course, the full arm cast. She thought about how his injuries were formed. Obviously, someone put their hands on him, but who?

She didn't know who he lived with besides his aunt. It was doubtful that a woman had done this sort of damage, but one never knows for sure.

As she put pen to plaster, she kept looking up at his face between strokes of ink. He had drifted off to sleep. His face was slack, a slight snore every time he breathed out. Lorcan looked so innocent like that and dare she say, gorgeous.

Having finished her artwork, she just watched him until the bell rang. She gently brushed a lock of hair off his forehead, delicately tucking it behind his ear. He didn't stir.

Elide wished there was something she could do to get him away from his more than shitty situation. Calling the police was probably out of the question, but that was really the only thing she could think of.

The bell rang.

---

He didn't realize he had fallen asleep until he felt his textbook being pulled from under his elbow. "Oh, shit. Sorry," Lorcan furrowed his brow as he started cleaning up his stuff.

"You looked tired, I didn't want to wake you, but it is lunch time." Elide smiled, "and you have to look at your cast!" She seemed so excited about it.

Expecting some nonsense, he was pleasantly surprised to find a nice line drawing from his elbow to his wrist. It was a row of detailed trees with her name under it. Lorcan looked at it with awe. He looked back at Elide, "You did that?" Obviously, she did that. Don't be stupid, Lorcan, he thought to himself.

She giggled. He thought her laugh was adorable. "Obviously." Lorcan's cheeks flushed while he finished packing up before they walked together to lunch in a comfortable silence.

---

He followed Elide through the lunch line, the lunch lady gave him an extra serving. He was probably looking a little gaunt these days having barely eaten for the past week. Lorcan started towards the empty table in the corner.

Apparently, Elide wasn't having any of that as she pulled him to the group table before he could go be alone. Everyone seemed excited to see him. His name was shouted amongst several other greetings. Lorcan felt a tug in his chest as he looked around at the friendly faces. Why were they always trying to be nice to him? And then his eyes fell on the silver haired boy, he instantly forgot what he was thinking. He stared at the green eyed beauty a fraction longer than he should have as he sat down.

Elide introduced everyone. Aelin, Lysandra, Manon, Dorian, Chaol, Fenrys, Connall, Rowan - the silver haired boy - and then Vaughn, who was the last one to join the table.

He was sitting between Elide and Fenrys. Lorcan kept his head down while he ate, feeling very out of place. Everyone was chatting around him, over him, leaning around him. It was a lot. He wished he was alone at the table in the corner.

Rowan spoke up, "Can I sign your cast?" Lorcan jerked his head up. The sleeve of Lorcan's hoodie was still pushed up, he had forgotten to pull it back down which was unusual, but under the current circumstances, it made sense.

Lorcan's heart sped and he suddenly felt warmth spread up his neck. It drove him crazy how much his body reacted of its own accord around Rowan. He wished it would stop.

There was no reason to deny him when the punishment was coming now anyway since Elide's Sharpie touched the cast in the library, so he just shrugged and moved his arm towards the center of the table, towards Rowan.

"Elide, can I borrow your Sharpie?" She handed it over with a nod and went back to animatedly talking to the other girls about something.

Lorcan was careful not to press into the edge of the table, as he adjusted his arm. "I don't think mine will be as pretty as Elide's. Sorry in advance." Lorcan just shrugged a shoulder. He watched Rowan do his little doodle.

Then Rowan grabbed Lorcan's hand to carefully twist his arm to get to a different part of the cast easier causing electricity to shoot through his skin. His breath hitched. The soft fingers lingering on his skin, he never wanted the other boy's hand to move. Lorcan's eyes darted to Rowan's face to see if he noticed anything weird. All he saw was intense concentration, the way his tongue stuck out just a tad and his brows stitched together. Suddenly he was too warm, chest tight, heart pounding. Hellas below.

"There!" Rowan smiled at his silly nonsensical line doodle signed with his name. "All done." That smile did weird things to his stomach and the absence of those warm fingers made all the heat he had just been feeling disappear. A shiver ran down his spine.

Rowan capped the Sharpie and went to hand it back to Elide when Fenrys grabbed it.

"Can I?"

"Yeah." He was screwed anyway.

By the end of lunch, his cast was covered in names and doodles by his... Friends? They couldn't be friends, could they?

As he walked to his next class, he started panicking. His chest tightening for a whole other reason than being in close proximity to a certain boy. A tightness that was only reminiscent of growing anxiety. He shouldn't have let anyone sign it. What was he thinking?

Fuck.

++++

"Lorcan," Rowan breathed as he saw the dark haired boy basically being dragged by Elide to their table. Everyone perked up at that and welcomed him back.

Rowan saw his pained expression. Then, he saw the cast and the light purples, greens, and yellows on his neck that Lorcan was obviously trying to hide with the hood of his hoodie. It looked like a handprint. A fucking handprint. His gut roiled at the thought.

But then Lorcan looked at him, and oh boy, those eyes were going to be the end of him. They were an amazing onyx, almost like pools of night. His cheeks heated and he hoped no one noticed.

He finally got the courage to ask to sign his cast. And when Lorcan leaned over to get his arm closer to Rowan, he noted the stiffness and slight discomfort that flitted over his face. There was so much damage to Lorcan's body that they couldn't see. It made him unbearably sad thinking about it.

For the rest of lunch, while everyone signed Lorcan's cast, Rowan just sat there silently, observing the beautiful dark haired boy. He'd catch his eye every now and then give him a small smile, which was never returned. His eyes just quickly flitted away. Lorcan, he learned was very hard to read.

Rowan wished they could hang out, just the two of them. He wanted to get to know him and help him. And know what those lips felt like, tasted like. How it would feel to thread his fingers through his long dark hair that was usually in a messy bun. Or just to hold his hand. Fuck, he had it bad.

____

Thank you for reading! Let me know if you would like to be tagged.

@thenerdandfandoms @starlightorstarfire

[themadauthorshatter]

I'm bored.

I'm continuing with that Tagatha rework I made little while back, the one where Tedros is with Sophie even though he starts having feelings for Agatha.

We start off where we left off last time, but with Tedros and Sophie in their Surviving Fairytales class. She kicks her apologizing into overdrive and states she had panicked and didn't want to be indecent, going as far as to say she had gotten some bruises and cuts she didn't want him to see.

He nods and fakes a smile, telling her to drop it so they can just go back to how they used to be, since that's all she wants.

A little too much salt for her liking, but she hugs him and promises to be the best girlfriend he's ever asked for.

Agatha sees this exchange, and Tedros look at her with a look that says, 'There. Happy?' She mouths back, "Thank you."

If this were a movie, we'd see Tedros roll his eyes and smile back, but frown as he and Sophie join the rest of the class.

TIME JUMP TO TEDROS AND AGATHA'S SHATED CLASS!!!!!

Everyone's being good little students and taking notes or working on their assignments in a mostly quiet classroom, mostly because there's the scratching of quills on paper, the chirping of birds, the blowing of the wind, rustling of trees, and maybe some humming from Dovey as she sits at her desk. I'm not sure what she's doing, but it's keeping her busy enough to not notice Tedros and Agatha's whispered conversation, which goes as follows. Remember, they're whispering, and Dovey is right in front of them:

"I get wanting to keep your friend happy, but why'd you REALLY want me to talk to her?"

(Agatha keeps writing necausr she wants her lost points back, the ones she lost from 'helping' Sophie) "Shh!"

"Agatha."

(Agatha uses Ignore, which doesn't seem to be very effective.)

(Tedros uses Poke) "Agatha."

"Do your assignment."

(Tedros shows her a full, complete paper as he smiles.)

(Agatha glowers at him, quickly checks on Dovey, and keeps writing her paper.)

"What's Sophie ever done for you after all your favors for her? Aside from being your friend?"

"Let me work."

(Tedros leans back in his seat and thinks back on their conversation from the other night, about how she misses home and Sophie is possibly the only friend she has. He also remembers that they're both Readers, how Agatha asked how someone could talk to the School Master, and Agatha's claim that the two of them met the School Master. With all that, he puts the pieces together, and the final result makes him a little sad.)

"You think she's my true love, too, huh?"

(Agatha stops writing for a second before continuing, eyes locked on her paper.)

"And you think that if we kiss, you'll get back to your village?"

(Agatha nods this time, finished with her paper.)

(Tedros is silent as well for a while. The students turn in their papers, one after another, and Tedros catches Agatha just as she comes back from turning hers in.) "Do you really think you'll be happier in your village instead of here?"

"Tedros, Agatha, since ypu two have takem a liking to each other, would you mind sharing your conversation with the rest of us?"

(Both almost jump out of their skins when Dovey speaks up, and soon all eyes are on them, especially a jealous, angry Beatrix, a confused but encouraging Chaddick, and Kiko, who blushes and stares at Agatha.)

(Agatha starts fretting over the attention, but Tedros, for once, has her back.)

"I had a hard time with the assignment. Since Agatha's so smart, I figured I'd ask her for help."

(The whole class gawks at the two of them, surprised at his kindness towards Agatha, who is staring wide eyed at him.)

(Dovey's stern look changes to one of surprise and then to glee.) "How nice to see you've had a change of heart, dear Prince."

On her way to her dorm, Tedros catches up to Agatha, and walks next to her, repeating his question before Dovey cut him off.

The only answer she gives him is, "I'll know when I'm back home," and a door in the face.

Tedros gives a smile. It's not that she's playing hard to get, he just wants an answer out of her. And he's starting to like this down to Earth, real girl.

And she NEVER said she would be happier back home.

IT'S THE NEXT DAY IN SURVIVING FAIRYTALES! ANOTHER FINDING GOOD CHALLENGE! RULES: 6 EVERS AND 6 NEVERS WILL BE DISGUISED AS ROSES OR TULIPS. THE FIRST TO FIND AND CORRECTLY IDENTIFY A PERSON ON THEIR SIDE WINS!!

Tedros listens to his heart completely and is the first to find a disguised Agatha.

Both win the challenge.

Agatha is surprised.

Sophie is a little pissed.

She's even more pissed when the nymphs kick her out of the Ever line at lunch and sees Tedros not only ignore her, but walk toward Agatha and Kiko.

"Is it okay if I join you two?"

Kiko immediately responds, 'yes,' and Agatha makes room for him.

Sure, Kiko has a crush on Tristan, but she's a little more interested in Agatha and Tedros; if she's failing, at least Agatha will have herself a date for the Snow Ball.

Tedros is silent as they eat, Kiko and Tedros making small talk and trying to include Agatha. It eventually leads to one of them telling a joke that makes Agatha laugh, and Tedros and Kiko seeing a softer side to Agatha, one that CAN laugh and be beautiful.

She stops after a little while and remembers Tedros's question, which makes her frown.

Now that she has a friend that is actually nice to her, amd is starting to somewhat have a good time in her school, Agatha can't help but wonder if going home would really make her happy.

She avoids him and Kiko for about a week ,taking her assignments and homework and then locking herself in her room.

It also doesn't help that Sophie's been avoiding her and yelling at her because, "she's stealing her prince, and ruining her fairytale. If she had the chance, she'd throw Agatha off the bridge between the two schools for ruining everything in what was supposed to be her Happily Ever After and her life as a whole. She's nothing but a cruel, evil, ugly witch, and she wishes she'd left Agatha to rot in her house on the hill in the cemetary." There's more, but you get the point.

To get in on the "being nice to the witch train," and to try cheering her up because she heard Sophie going off on Agatha(Tedros ALSO heard this, but pretended to ignore it. You'll see why later), Beatrix tries coerce Agatha into a makeup and gossip session with the other Evergirls, even letting it slip that Sophie has been talking shit behind her back more than she thought and it might be good for Agatha to spill the beans and get it all out.

She gets a clump thrown at her face for this.

Agatha's silent in Good Deeds, after almost two weeks of hiding away in her room, though does have to fight a mini giggle fit as Tedros acts silly behind Dovey's back, i.e. waving and 'psst'-ing to get Agatha's attention. He doesn't get caught.

Agatha shakes her head and ignores him, tired from crying and just wanting to stay in her bad mood.

With a challenge accepted, in his mind, Tedros tosses some crumpled up notes her way, five to be exact.

THIS gets him caught, and a week of clappong chalkboard erasers.

These are the notes he tossed to Agatha in order:

'Sorry if what I said made you upset. Still, would you be happier here ir back home?'

'Kiko's nicer to you than Sophie. Just saying.'

'Please stop ignoring me (insert sad puppy face doodle)'

'Meet me in the hall after everyone's asleep, around ten or eleven. We have to talk'

They meet and Tedros, covered in some chalk dust, asks his question a third time.

Agatha snaps with, "I don't know!"

It silences Tedros, even as Agatha goes off on a very tearful and flustered rant about how she WANTS to go home, but doesn't want to leave Sophie behind, because she's Agatha's best friend, or, admittedly, Kiko, because she's super nice and didn't want to see her fail. She hadn't fully had a good time at school, but it has been enough for her to reconsider going home a little bit. She misses her mother and knows she's probably worried sick, even though Callis is probably just anxious about hearing Agatha's adventures in Evil. She wants to go home, but doesn't want to leave Sophie behind, as she's in danger in Evil.

She's worried about her mother back home, but is a little more worried about Sophie's safety.

Tedros states it shouldn't matter because of how Sophie's been treating her.

Agatha only responds, "She's the only friend I have. I don't have anyone else."

Tedros sits next to her and almost holds her hand, but falters, sort of getting that even though they're not insulting each other, they're still not THAT close yet. "You have me. A-and Kiko. Is... that enough?"

Agatha awkwardly wraps her arms around his neck and keeps crying, muffling the sound in his shoulder.

Tedros returns her hug and rubs and pats her back, telling her to let it out and that it's okay, she's going to be okay.

In his heart, he makes his decision in who he might love more.

The next day, while Agatha's sitting alone, hidden from the sight of anyone, hiding really well somewhere, Tedros asks Sophie if they can talk alone.

They go off into a small clearing away from everyone else, Sophie smiling and happy to possibly get her prince back and Tedros sullen and quiet.

He asks her if she cares about Agatha, mentioning all the things she did in order for the two of them to be together and kiss, which should send them home.

Sophie brushes it off by saying Agatha is a liar and never keeps her word.

"Funny. That sounds more like you than anyone else."

Sophie snaps that Tedros that he shouldn't care about Agatha because she isn't his true love.

Tedros counters with a question: Does Sophie REALLY love him? If she did, then why hasn't she told him more about Gavaldon, her family, even about her basic school life? Even better, what's the REAL reason she didn't she help him in the trial?

Sophie doesn't have an answer.

He apologizes and says that the two should just stay with their respective schools, even apologizing that he couldn't help get her or Agatha home.

Sohpie tries callimg him back, but he ignores her and starts looking for Agatha.

It takes him a WHILE, but he eventually finds her.

Apparently she's a better observer than he could imagine because she is sitting perfectly balanced in a willow tree.

"What do you want now?"

"I was just wondering if you needed a hand, but I don't think you do."

"Anything else?"

"The mates have practice later, and I still have detention. Are you doing anything at sunset?"

Agatha blushes and says no, and then admits she can't get down.

Tedros holds out his arms, Agatha slides and falls off the branch she's on, and lands safely in Tedros's arms, leading him to notice some climbing bruises on her legs.

"Come on, let's go to class."

"You're just doing this to get out of detention, aren't you?"

Tedros smiles and shrugs. "Your shoes aren't tied. I don't want you falling flat on your face."

This was part 2 of the Tagatha Touch-up AU!!! A bit longer, but kinda worth it. The ending was a little cheesy, but I hope you guys liked this! I had a good time with this, it's fun being cupid☺️!

Thanks again for reading and I hope you enjoyed!!

[prodtrouver]

Perfect Red || p.js

Perfect Red • park jisung

Who knew the shade of red would look so attractive on a person? So attractive, it drove him mad. The shade of red has never looked so stunning before. Whereas Jisung has a major crush on you and the effect of your gracious look only made him long for you even more.

Pairing: Sociology Classmate!Park Jisung x fem!reader

Other characters: Dreamies, mention of Stray Kids’ Lee Felix, Itzy’s Ryujin and Lia

Genre: fluff, a little crack, maybe a little angst if you look closely, classmates to friends, friends to lovers,

Warnings: a lot of teasing, a few cuss words, a little tension

Word Count:  2,091

A/n: that shade of red lipstick looks stunning on Jisung, so whoever the creator is- pls give them a raise

A/n: I'm ALIVEEEEE

Park Jisung was never fond of looks nor talking to many people. The boy would often listen attentively, or doodle random things on his notebook, or just stare into space. He only talks to his friends, the Dreamies, what people call them.

He wouldn’t pay attention to anyone else. If he was assigned to a group where he barely knows anyone, he would distant himself, only cooperating with them from time to time...

The day you transferred was the day everyone suddenly grew fond of you. Many went to approach you, asking you a lot of things about yourself. You already have a lot of friends even you are very new to the school.

That was until you came not so long ago.

Unknowingly and unwillingly, Jisung kept on looking at you. He notices how your jet black hair sometimes falls off your ear whenever you brush it back. He notices how your eyes sparkle at a silly joke someone made. He notices how you dress nicely every day, either jeans, shorts, or skirts.

“Jisunggie is staring again~~” He felt his seatmate nudge his shoulder. The younger glares at him, not believing once again that he was staring at her.

“Shut up, Chenle. I was not staring.” Jisung grips the pencil in his grasp. Chenle only hums, shrugging his shoulders and an evident teasing smile on his lips.

“As if, Pwark. You’re staring at her far too much these days, it’s quite obvious you have grown an interest in her.” Chenle raises his brows, up and down. Jisung would be lying if he said he doesn’t want to stab them.

“Shut up, I don’t have an interest in her.” Jisung pushes the older away from him, only earning his dolphin laugh.

His laugh echoing in the room, not being minded by the students for it is normal. Jisung puffs his cheeks, stealing another glance at you. He freezes, noticing your eyes on him.

“Not interested in her, hmmm,” Chenle whispers, earning another hit from Jisung.

You wave at him, cracking a sweet smile. Jisung could feel his heartbeat pounding quickly, probably almost ready to jump out of his chest and run towards you for your claim of his love.

His cheeks only become warmer, and his hands were getting sweaty, he looks away suddenly.

He quickly steals another glance, becoming confused when he sees the prominent frown on your face before you look away.

What was that for? Did he do something wrong?

It was another day, Sociology only happens in Wednesdays and Thursdays. It was surely a disappointment for Jisung that he could only see you twice a week, lucky if he sees you in the halls.

“Jisung has a crush~ interesting!” Jeno cheers, waving his soda can in the air. Jisung covers his face, embarrassed by his Hyungs.

“Tell us who it is!” Donghyuck says, slightly slapping the shoulder of Chenle. Jisung glares at Chenle, only for the older to stick his tongue out at the latter.

“Fuck you,” Jisung lets out, earning a gasp from Jaemin and laughter from the other boys.

“Aw~ our youngster has grown up. Look, there she is.” Renjun points on the right, the boys immediately turning their heads to look at the entrance of the cafeteria.

Jisung has never felt so stunned in his whole life of being alive. He felt his breath suddenly taken away by your gorgeous look and your stunning summer outfit.

Your off-shoulder floral white crop top complimented your long jet black hair. Your blue denim shorts have small floral patches that match your top. You looked stunning, and it made Jisung have the urge to just approach you.

However, he was also being driven crazy.

Your lips, your god damn red lips.

Since when did you start wearing lipstick? The shade of red looked brilliant on you. It made your soft and plump lips stand out, almost kissable to say the most.

Jisung licks his lips, curious about how your soft lips would feel in his. Will it be warm? What will your lips taste like? Will your lips feel soft as it looks?

“I’m going back to my classroom.” Jisung wraps his bag around his shoulder, not wanting to be more tempted than he already was.

Seeing your lips move, hearing your honey voice only drove him mad even more. He looks away before you could look at him.

He slams his big hands on the table, making a loud bang which made the boys jump from their seats.

“Jesus- what’s wrong with you?” Mark asks, his bread in his mouth, his voice came out muffled.

It was Thursday, the second day of Sociology, also the second time you would see Jisung in your class.

Having the urge to pull you close to him, wrap his arms around your waist, and deeply kiss you were swimming around his head.

You pull out the lipstick from your drawer, having second thoughts of wearing it after that day. Thoughts of confessing to him flood your head, should you just give up?

His crush on you was only getting bigger and bigger every day he sees you. He was afraid, if he sees you wearing that red lipstick, even more, he would kiss you in an instant.

If only you have the actual courage to talk to him. You always notice he looks away after you look at him.

“Again with that lipstick?” Your turn your head towards the door, seeing your best friend, Felix.

He wasn’t fond of lipstick at all, in a matter of fact, he doesn’t like it on you. He would often say you look better without it, not having the idea it could please your crush on Jisung.

“Shut up- maybe, all I want is to get noticed by my crush.” You say, earning a snicker from Felix instead.

“How about actually talk to him? I thought you enjoy talking to people.” Felix leans on your door frame, staring at you. You sigh, removing the cover of the small white cylinder. The shade of red which you like covers the sponge. Felix let out a sigh, watching you put on the lipstick on your lips.

“You do you, boo.” His deep voice makes you look at him, watching the boy leave your room. You get up from your seat, fixing your black skirt.

The usual compliments and greetings threw at you as soon as you enter the campus. A few friends greet you a wonderful morning until you enter the classroom, immediately glancing at Jisung. You see the blank look on his face, his eyes kept on you.

You exit your room, letting Felix drive you to campus.

You make your way on your seat, preparing the things you need for your classes. You look around, laughing at the loud jokes and silly laughs of the students inside the room.

“y/n!” You turn your head, looking at the boy who shouted your name. You saw Jisung pushing him off his chair instead. The boy let out a dolphin laugh as he gives you a gesture to walk to them.

“Yah! Zhong Chenle!” Jisung cries, making the boy laugh harder. You get up from your seat, walking towards them. The confused look on your face, the soft smile on your red lips, Jisung’s adoration for you grew even more.

“Do you like someone?” Chenle suddenly asks, laughing when he sees the shocked look on your face.

“He’s tall, currently has brown hair, has pretty lips and I wish he would just look at me longer.” Jisung’s disappointed look was replaced with a confused one. He looks at you, only to see you staring at him.

You glance at Jisung who was staring at you, his stare looked unreadable. It looked serious, blank yet his eyes look like they’re saying something.

“Yes, I do. I do like someone, why do you ask?” You show a sweet soft smile, not wanting to make your crush on Jisung obvious.

Jisung lets out a sigh, a soft groan, and the look on his face cries disappointment, and this did not go unnoticed by you.

Suspicions arise in your head. Your heart doing flips, your stomach starting to get full with knots of anxiety, your head was flooded with thoughts.

“I’m just curious, tell me a few hints!” Chenle stayed all smiley, laughs manages to escape his lips.

The boy beside him already radiates gloominess and disappointment. You look at Jisung, his attention on the floor. Chenle’s smile became wider, witnessing what is called a silly crush.

“I better go, I still have things to do.” You say, walking away, afraid if you stay longer, you’ll end up saying your love for him.

Jisung looks at your lips, you were wearing that red lipstick again. That god damn red lipstick, how he wishes he could ruin your pretty lipstick with a kiss.

Your eyes just staring directly at each other until he felt his heart beating loudly again. He immediately looks away, missing the disappointed look on your face.

“What happened there?” Chenle asks, an obvious smirk on his lips. Jisung looks at him, Chenle laughs when he saw the desperate look on Jisung’s face.

“How I wish I could ruin her gorgeous red lipstick,” Jisung muttered, a very loud dolphin laugh comes out from Chenle.

“Put that lipstick on! It looks amazing on you!” Lia Says, brushing the sponge on your lips. The shade of red complimented your eye makeup. The rhinestones under your eyes made the girls’ hearts flutter.

“You look beautiful! This will surely catch his attention!” Ryujin says, laughing as she puts on the last clip on your hair. You let out a chuckle,

Jisung watches people dance to the music being played. The boys having their fun while he was just watching people have fun. He wishes you were here, talking casually with him, keeping him company, maybe even confess his adoration and love for you.

“Why are you alone?” His face sparkles a bit, looking at his side to see you there. The slightly surprised look on your face, your red eye makeup with rhinestones, your casual red outfit, and above all, those red lips on you.

‘I’m just attending the party to have fun, not catch his attention. I don’t even know if he will be there at all!”

Damn, you love that shade. He was starting to wonder if you know its effect on him.

“The boys have their fun. How about you?” He kept his attention on you, unable to remove them from you. You sit down beside him, letting out a muffled laugh.

“My girls also have their fun.” You say, watching your friends dance the party away. Jisung looks at your lips, trying to control himself from smashing his lips on yours, however, that was replaced with temptation when you suddenly smiled at him.

Your smile disappeared from your lips when Jisung suddenly grabs your hand. He gets up from his seat, immediately dragging you to a vacant room. He closes the door, turning around to look at you.

He leans closer, soon letting your lips meet. Your lips were exactly what he thought it would feel. Soft, warm, and satisfying, his urge has disappeared but the need for the claim was still there. He breaks the kiss, a smile on his face when he faces you.

“Do you know what effect you are doing to me right now?” He asks, confusing you, “Do you know how much urge I need to control because of you? Do you know how much those red lips of yours affect me?”

“Or do you need to know the temptation I need to control whenever I see that shade of red on your lips?” Jisung asks, getting no answer from you. Your crush doing this completely killed you, it was insane. Jisung walks towards you, taking your face in his palms.

“I have this crush on you, and your red lipstick has been driving me mad,” Jisung says, your eyes were wide, shocked by the confession of your crush. You crack a small smile, you rest your head on his chest as you wrap your arms around his waist.

“Then wearing that to catch your attention did work. You just never approached me.” You pout, looking at Jisung but the boy only shyly smiles. He kisses your forehead,

“Does his mean we are boyfriend and girlfriend now?” He asks, making you laugh. You nod, pecking his lips.

“Yes, we are now boyfriend and girlfriend.”