#i think there are moments i really like of Arthur and Gwen interacting and i think merlins interactions w both of them are sweet

[like-sands-of-time]

It's pretty insane that saying that arwen could have been done so much better is met with such disdain. And the way I'm seen as an Arthur stan or Gwen hater by saying that. I'm literally saying the both of them deserved better..?

Gwen (and Arthur let's be completely real here) was a victim of a show that was chronically inconsistent in their characterizations of people. She suffered (as Arthur did) from a story line that I'm sorry is just really bad. And you can still love Gwen and Arthur from legend. But I can still say this interpretation falls short in showing the growth of their relationship in a way that feels real and not just .. necessary.

[pendragonsclotpole]

help, i just got slapped in the face with the existence of WILL. be still my beating heart as i write an essay on this man, will of ealdor

firstly, i adore the silent and implicit trust hidden in the first joke that introduces will’s character. like merlin’s been aware his whole life that if his secret is ever found out, he will be hunted down and persecuted, but here comes will with a jab that they both inherently understand is a joke in the macabre style only true friends can lovingly master. the smile they share almost immediately gives me ned stark and robert baratheon meeting again in the courtyard of winterfell in season one of got. there’s also something so normal in their interaction that speaks of a familiarity borne from their equal status and years of friendship. i know merlin’s friends in camelot tend to skew to the non-royal/non-noble, but when you tally it up, those closest to merlin often hold some title that’s greater than merlin’s role as arthur’s servant. gwaine is a knight implied to be of noble blood; lancelot, percival, and elyan are also knighted and esteemed members of arthur’s court; gwen is the lady morgana’s maid and close companion long before she is ever queen; gaius is a physician and long time member of camelot’s court; morgana before her betrayal is literally uther’s ward. i feel like when placed among them all, merlin has a tendency to fade into the background offscreen. obviously the audience knows how important merlin is to the overall story given how much of the storyline focuses on him, and the characters regularly acknowledge merlin’s importance to them or arthur, but all of them still regard merlin as merlin the servant from camelot and few of them are privy to the plots we as the audience see firsthand. and even when they acknowledge him for his merits, his role as arthur’s close friend and confidante takes precedence. look at leon’s reaction in the later seasons when merlin is bewitched by morgana. merlin literally makes a comment about plotting to kill arthur and leon barely even blinks before quipping back, “driving you mad isn’t he?” or something along those lines. except for a few instances with even fewer characters, they never get a chance to know him as merlin the sorcerer from ealdor.

will does! and more than that, he got to know merlin as he is without arthur. we all hype up their status as magical soulmates but damn if i wasnt living for how jealous of arthur will seemed to be in this episode. call me crazy, but it makes me desperately headcanon a realistic past in ealdor for merlin, full of hardship and strife, but never without it’s moments of happiness. furthermore, will’s lone appearance in season one shines some real light on the unfairness of the fate that has been bestowed on meelin. the moment that will points out why he’s been so obstinate with arthur really strikes a deep chord. sure it could be just jealousy, but more compellingly, i choose to read it as a deep sense of care for merlin. everyone merlin has met within camelot, (or reunited with in the case of his own mother) has continually pushed him closer and closer to arthur. will presents a crucial exception. he knows exactly who merlin was before camelot, and who merlin is completely separate from arthur.

will is staunchly in merlin’s corner, and that position allows him to identify a key characteristic of merlin’s series’ long arc: his complete devotion to arthur. will even points it out himself: merlin could singlehandedly defend their home if he just used the full extent of his power. merlin doesn’t, and actively chooses not to because of his desire to stay close to arthur. it’s such a small moment, but i think it demonstrates how much of merlin’s decisions become motivated by his desire to stay close to arthur and to always put arthur first, even at a detrimental cost to himself. merlin understands and readily accepts arthur as his destiny, but this acceptance does not come about independently, instantly, or of merlin’s own volition. it does so eventually, but initially merlin sticks by arthur’s side because of the encouragement of everyone around him. “arthur needs you, merlin” or “arthur is your destiny, merlin” or “arthur is a good man, merlin. he has the potential to be a great king, he just needs the right people, merlin.” its codependent as hell.

sure, merlin originally does not tell arthur about his magic because they do not know each other and as far as merlin knows revealing his magic would lead to his death, but eventually the reasoning changes and becomes so focused on doing what’s best for arthur. merlin can’t tell arthur because then arthur would have to kill him and then who would look after arthur or ensure his fate? merlin can’t tell arthur because if arthur chooses to defy uther’s law, merlin is then forcing arthur to turn against his father and how could he look after arthur then? merlin can’t tell arthur because another betrayal from magic would ruin everything and truthfully, he wonders how would arthur react? merlin comes to fear what his magic might do to arthur and what it’s reveal might mean for his place in camelot more than the laws of camelot and their verdicts.

by this logic, merlin is a magical solar system orbiting entirely around the celestial body known as arthur pendragon. eventually merlin cared more about his relationship with arthur and what arthur thought about him than his own life. in retrospect, it’s so sad that will died so early on, because it strips merlin of a person solely in his corner. will’s death is the first in the series’ long pattern of loss that merlin endures and that eventually comes to define him because people either find out about his magic and their knowledge is directly tested against his loyalty to arthur, or he cannot allow them to know about his magic because it will unravel his relationship with arthur.

will, freya, balinor, morgana, mordred, arthur.

also the fact that will covered for merlin’s use of magic in his last moments just adds to the tragedy AND the growing pile of moments merlin could have told arthur about his magic but didnt. and also the fact that will literally died to save arthur. like tell me that just doesn’t prove my point. tell me. will never stood a chance. tell me every aspect of merlin’s life does not get consumed by arthur pendragon.

i’m all for merthur being soulmates, but god the original series is rife with the unbalanced mess of merlin being wholeheartedly aware of arthur’s great potential and destiny leading to some intense devotion and faith that yes, arthur earns and pays back in full measure but can never fully reciprocate because he just does not know anything. by the triple goddess, it can get so toxic. i wish will had lived if just for that. and like the jealousy arthur gets whenever merlin has other people. because i 100% live for possessive arthur and protective merlin dynamics.

[iris-black13]

In honour of Merlin trending for literally no reason today, I would like to share my theories that I came up with during my recent rewatch. (I'm only up to season 3 right now so there really aren't that many theories yet.)

1. Merlin and Arthur 100% fell in love with each other in season 1, but they aren't aware of it at all.

2. Merlin is so gay. I'm not sure if he knows it or not, but Merlin is not attracted to women. Every time he's seemed interested in a woman, it's because she's been a powerful sorceress or a magical creature. Speaking of Freya; his only real female love interest, what he loves about her is that he sees himself in her. He feels a sense of kinship towards her as someone who is trapped and hunted for something out of her control. I don't think he feels any actual romantic love for her. He loves her, sure. But I think he's confusing romantic love for something else. (But idk I could be wrong.)

3. I don't think the Morgana we got back after her disappearance is the same Morgana we had pre S2E12. I think she probably died and came back wrong. Because otherwise the personality difference is too drastic. Her relationship with Gwen for instance. It makes sense if she didn't forgive Merlin for what he did, but why is she so mean to Gwen?? Gwen was her best friend and maybe even her first love? Morgana was never classist before season 3, but afterwards she acts like Gwen is lesser than and it just doesn't make sense. Anyway that's my in-universe explanation for her terrible shift in character.

4. This is the most important one. Merlin doesn't realize he's in love with Arthur until some time shortly before the season 2 finale. Before the finale, Merlin is happy to cheer on the romance between Arthur and Gwen. Two of his best friends fell in love! Why wouldn't he be happy? Even if they think there's no future for their relationship, he's more than happy to help them get together because Merlin believes in loving who you want to love.

Now, I could go on about how falling in love with Gwen is basically Arthur's way of expressing his repressed feelings for Merlin since Gwen and Merlin are of the same social standing and since Gwen is a woman he can experience the love he could have had with Merlin if it was allowed, but I won't do that. This ain't about him. What's important is that Merlin, in the season 2 finale- knows he's in love with Arthur, and that Arthur can't love him back. After the finale, he's still happy to help his friends in their affections for each other, but his bright goofy smile is gone. It's replaced with this melancholy smile and a hesitant voice.

I'm so serious right now. If you don't believe me, just go rewatch seasons 2 and 3 and see the shift in his demeanor yourself. He actively avoids them when they're interacting in season 3. In- I think it was the changeling episode, at the end, Arthur and Merlin walk into a hallway at the bottom of the staircase. They both see Gwen on the staircase, and when Arthur starts up the stairs, Merlin immediately leaves. It's not a "I'll give them their space" moment. It's a "I can't be here right now" kind of moment. He doesn't even try to stick around to protect Arthur on their date in the episode where Morgana frames Gwen for witchcraft. (and don't even get me started on that episode of my god.) Normally, he would stick around in the shadows to make sure nothing goes wrong and they aren't attacked or anything. It's weird that he doesn't try to stick around!

And oh my God. There are so many moments where Colin Morgan's acting just makes my heart ache. In the crystal caves, Merlin trying to banter with an unconscious Arthur while trying desperately to heal him makes me want to cry. And any time he's encouraging Gwen to follow her heart and be with Arthur just makes me ache. In the "...you still have feelings for him." And the "you like him. He likes you. Isn't that all that really matters?" I just can't.

Honestly, I could go on, but this post is already wordy enough. Thanks for coming to my Ted talk.

[tora-the-cat]

Like...a season 3 era spell that isn't quite a truth spell? More of an emotion revealing spell. Like the idea would be that it strips you of the ability to put on airs or fronts about how you feel about someone else. Like you can still lie with words, but all your mannerisms and expressions and such surrounding those words would come straight from the heart and probably reveal said lie immediately. Arthur and Merlin can still snipe at each other and throw insults till sundown, but the whole time Arthur is nothing but doey eyed and Merlin is....Merlin. And it generally brings your emotions closer to the front of your mind, so even though you can lie, you do have to put some effort and focus into it; it's harder the more emotional you are, but basically easy if it's like a reflexive lie you tell every day without thinking (or feeling) anything about it.

Starts very cutely with like Merlin and Arthur bickering but also, like, fawning over each other, yk? Adorable iconic etc etc. The REAL fun part is when Merlin and Morgana pass each other in the hallway and start hissing slurs. They FUCKING hate each other and everyone is 0.0 staring like 'what is going on....here. What. Is THAT'. Morgana tries to talk to Gwen but starts crying. She ignores Arthur because her brain literally can't figure out how she feels enough to really interact with him. With Merlin though it's easy fuck that guy!! Just Kill Him! (.....Uther might already. Be dead.)

I just like the tonal dissonence of like....starting wtih Merlin and Arthur, in a quiet and private moment, mutally coming to terms with how earnest their connection is despite the circumstances around it and anything they say or lingering doubts they nurse in the dead of night.....both of them trying to maintain their usual banter for the comfort of the other even as they're indulging in little cares, Merlin acting strange and offputting but not trying to leave, neither shying away or trying to hide this awkwardly exposed truth from the other. Very Tender.

And then not so quietly ending with Morgana just....sneering. And Merlin  being like. Vaugely guilty but mostly wanting her dead. And Arthur is just standing there like 'What: IS THIS."

[an-entity-i-think]

QPR!Mergana Prompt:

Blah blah merlin reveals his magic earlier they figure out how to defeat Morgana without killing her blah blah she's redeemed even though her and Merlin are still like HIGHLY suspicious of each other and everyone thinks that either one of them would kill the other at any given moment if given the choice.

The council refuses to allow Morgana to be placed third in line for the crown after the king and queen because 'she'll kill them and then take the thrown legally why on earth would we agree to that?'. Which Arthur and Gwen are annoyed at cause she's redeemed! Have some faith smh

Meanwhile the council is looking beside them where Morgana and Merlin are glaring at each other like theyre about to start civil war all over again cause Morgana 'accidently' threw some hummus in his hair and Merlin 'accidently' spilt some of his wine on her dress and should someone get between that?

But I digress. Someone says 'if she marrys someone of suitable nature to rule *with* her in case the king and queen are dead or otherwise unable to rule, then we can probably agree with it' and everyone sits back and is like damn yeah that's so true random lord nobody cares about

But Arthur of course who found HIS true love (and is now a feminist, good job Gwen and Merlin!) Looks at his sister like 🥺 I'd never force you to marry 🥺 is there anybody you'd be happy to marry? 🥺 if not we can try to argue for something else? 🥺

And Morgana bored as hell, twirling a knife around, but with not a single slick of hesitation is like, 'Merlin.'

And everyone's eyes widen in shock while Merlin uses magic to turn the knife into a well known thorned purple flower (ouch), responds, again without a single slick of hesitation, 'Yeah, sure.'

And jaws drop.

Arthur and Gwen, both on the same page of absolute confusion are like 'what' cause neither of them have seen either of their best friends show any sort of attraction towards the other (and even though they ignore their hostile interactions cause neither of them have been hurt... permanently since she came back). They look at each other like 'did we miss something? Are they together? Is all this hostility some sort of foreplay?)

It is *not* foreplay.

But to understand we'd have to go back to when Morgana and Merlin were friends. You know, when they both were happy and hopeful for a better future.

Because they were *friends*. And even though maybe they weren't *best friends* because Morgana had Gwen and Merlin had Arthur, they were still close! And they still cared for each other and talked about things that they couldn't really talk to their other friends about!

And one of those things is that Morgana doesn't think she'd ever want to have sex. Ever. Like she is repulsed by the idea, girl or boy. And the idea of being married off? And being forced to have an heir she doesn't want? With someone she probably doesn't even like?

Well. That scares the fuck out of her.

And she shares this with Merlin who of course holds her hand because both of them are generally emotionally healthy at the time with physically affection and he shares that he doesn't really care for the idea of sex either. That he isn't completely repulsed by it and wouldn't mind doing it with someone he loved to make them happy but that he doesn't really see them importance of it and what all the fuss is about and that she isn't 'broken' or whatever else she believes and they cry and hug and it's nice and friendly.

They have many conversations where this comes up, a knight will make a dirty joke within hearing range and they'll look to each other across the room to make an 'ick' face before both holding back laughs.

They'll talk about how to respond Gwen and Arthur practically undressing each other with their eyes with equal disgust and fondness.

Maybe Merlin even tells her of Freya and how he thinks he might have loved her and how he doesn't think he wants to again because it took all this time to even maybe like someone romantically and it didn't end well and even though he hears everyone crave it he thinks well maybe he was in love with the idea of loving someone and having someone by his side more than he loved her and does that make him wrong somehow?

And this time it's Morgana's turn to say 'no it's not wrong!' Because she's never understood why her friendship with Gwen and him were supposed to be 'less' than whatever hypothetical romance she'll be forced to have with a man. Because everyone around them always say 'it's like friendship but more' when describing how they fell in love and it makes her stomach turn because why is one love more than another? Can't they both be important? Why is it more and why can't it just be different?

And she says that she thought it was just because she couldn't stand the idea of having sex with someone so she assumed that was why she's never had the feeling of butterflies in her stomach but she goes on with 'if you're wrong then so am I, but since you said I'm not broken then neither are you'.

And they hug and maybe they'll joke around and kiss each other on the hands to show intimacy between friends and neither of them are worried about how it could be misconstrued because they both know there's nothing romantic or sexual about it and they just smile happily.

And maybe Merlin will give her flowers because he knows she likes the purple ones even though they're thorned and maybe she'll show him how to make it into a crown and put it on him just as he puts one on her because well neither of them will be crowned because well he's just a servant and she's just a ward but that doesn't matter in Morganas room while they giggle like peasants and dance like royalty.

Not every talk is as kind as others and especially as Morganas magic gets stronger she gets more and more distant because well Merlin never thought she was broken before but well everyone has a line right?

But one night when he snuck in, he had a rough day where he almost died again and he can't tell anybody (shed also just woken up from another nightmare) so he goes to his friend and she knows he doesn't want to talk about it from the ruffle of his eyebrows (and she doesnt want to talk about it, he can tell from the slightest downward frown) so they lay on the bed and she offers her hand which he takes and they hold each other tight and curl up to share warmth with their hands held between them and neither of them can sleep but sharing this is enough for now.

And maybe- it's been a few minutes or a few hours they're not sure but the sun hasn't risen yet so when Merlin begins to talk it has nothing to do with what's bothering either of them at the moment but both of them love plans and ideas so when he says, 'if one day you are betrothed against your wishes, we could get married instead. Then neither of us would have to worry about being with someone who doesn't understand because I trust you not to take what I don't want to give and I hope you trust me for the same.'

And maybe Merlin hasn't told her about his magic because he's scared and isn't sure and maybe Morgana won't tell him about the dream (nightmare) she just had about a sister because she doesn't think he'd understand but sometimes trusting someone more than anyone else doesn't equal telling them every single thing about yourself even if it hurts to discover it after.

So when Morgana says 'well what lf they try to hurt you for it? What if they think you've enchanted me or something else just as silly. You know how Uther is.'

And they both think 'I fear him more than you know and I'd never wish you harm.'

But Merlin just smiles the tiniest smile with the hint of a dimple that always makes Morgana smile back when she sees it and says, 'Well, we'll protect each other won't we? In sickness and in health?'

And later, much much later, Merlin will give her a cup of tea and end up choosing the lives of thousands of people over her not only cause it was the right thing to do but also because he thought that's what *she* would have wanted too once upon a time when they kissed each other's hands.

And even later than that she will leave him chained up and for certain death on the side of her sister not only cause she thought he betrayed her and thought she was broken after all but also because she doesn't understand why he wouldn't support her birthright even after placing a crown on each other's head while giggling and dancing.

But for that moment in bed before anything terrible happens between then with hands entwined she snorts a little before they both grin. They stare at each other as if measuring the earnestness in each other's eyes before their smiles gentle.

'Promise?' Morgana asks. Because even though she's never been a damsel in distress who needs a prince to save her, the idea of having someone by her side... and that person being someone she trusts is something she's never allowed herself.

But of course Merlin just squeezes their hands tightly like an oath all on its own, 'I promise,' because even though he'll never be a knight, he doesn't need a sword to be there for someone he cares about.

So they smile at each other with love. Not a love that's 'more' than friendship, but they both think separately that maybe it is a little different than their love for Gwen and Arthur even if it isn't the same different kind of love between lovers.

And maybe they fall asleep like that with smiles on their faces before waking up just as dawn hits where they will pull away and Merlin will kiss her on the forehead just as she kisses him on the cheek and they will hug and go their separate ways just before Gwen comes bustling in to begin her servant work for the day. Surprised her Lady is smiling, she asks happily, 'No nightmare?'

And Morgana looks up in surprise, before smiling gently in a way that Gwen can't quite decipher, 'Oh I didn't dream at all.'

And they'll smile at each other and later at dinner she'll stick her tongue out at Merlin behind Uther and Arthur's back when they talk about the next princess for Arthur to woo and even though later it will not be well between then and even later than that it will be even worse-

Eventually they end up in the council room where there are talks about Morgana being crown princess if she is betrothed. And her brother and best friend look at her with worry in their eyes because they'd never wish her to do something against her will but for the briefest of moments, so quick only Merlin would notice, she looks down at the purple wine stain on her dress and thinks about the purple flower crown that was placed gently upon her head and says calmly, assuredly, 'Merlin' as her choice. Because hadn't she already chosen so many years ago?

And his eyes may only flicker towards her, but she only needs to look at her knife transform into a thorned purple flower, thorns just missing her hand, for her to know he's remembering the same moments as her.

'Yeah, sure.'

And maybe everyone thinks they were hiding some sort of torrid romance from them, or that they're crazy, or even that all their hostility is some sort of foreplay for hate sex of some sort.

But they don't know about the long talks they shared while laying on the ground side by side and kisses on each other's hands and flower crowns and giggles and dancing and-

They don't know how it feels to kill and be killed by someone you promised to protect and were promised to be protected by.

They don't know how it feels to go into a battle to the death with someone and wake up to see a glare on their face while their hand is entwined with yours.

So maybe the council will murmur about how the court sorceror would never let her kill for the crown and maybe Arthur and Gwen will murmur worriedly to each other about if this is a good idea? And did they miss something?

And maybe he'll trip her so she falls when she stands up so she knocks the leg of his chair so he falls with her and maybe both of them were *somehow* cushioned so it's an annoyance and not a bruise.

Just as they've always been physical with their affection (it's so important to share how you feel), they try to be emotionally healthy and share their disdain too (best not to bottle it up).

Because, well, even though she'd never take a cup of tea from him and he flinches when he sees her near some chains- when a certain song comes on well they must share a dance, don't they? And if they see some purple flowers, well, flower crowns just must be made- it'd be wrong not to.

And well, if they're married, it's quite normal for them to entwine their hands while they sleep dreamless and warm even if he wakes up with a scratchy pillow and she wakes up with hers covered in slime.

After all, what is love without some pain? And truly, love and hatred are but a slippery slope.

A promise is a promise after all.

[transdimensional-void]

the thing that frustrates me the most about bbc merlin’s “gwen chose arthur over lancelot” narrative is that if you watch the episode where the choosing supposedly happens, gwen has no say in it at all. lancelot is the one who chooses.

it’s season 2, episode 4, “lancelot and guinevere.” gwen and lancelot have had romantic tension out the wazoo all episode just like they did back in 1-5 where they first met, while arthur and gwen have had a few, tentative romantic moments since the end of season 1. personally, i think gwen seems much more interested in lancelot than arthur, but at the very least, it seems that she is equally open to either romance at that point.

but then once arthur and co. rescue gwen and lancelot, lancelot sees arthur and gwen interacting romantically and decides not to pursue her anymore. he pulls gwen aside and tells her he won’t get in the way of her relationship with arthur. and then he just leaves without giving her any time to respond. 

there is no active choosing on gwen’s part at all, and that’s what really bothers me. the show could have written her some response to lancelot’s words. if they wanted to leave the tension in place, they could have gone with a, “i barely know you. i don’t really know what i want yet. give me some time to decide?” or if they wanted to convince us that she ultimately wanted arthur more they could have had her thank lancelot for stepping aside.

but instead they just leave her in this passive position of having no choice but arthur. and we can try to frame it as, if she really wanted lancelot she would have gone after him, but that’s still only speculation. angel’s acting in that scene makes her seem very torn between the two men, or possibly more interested in lancelot but not quite sure what that means for her relationship to arthur, who is, after all, a prince and not an easy person for her to cross.

for me, it undercuts the idea of arthur and gwen as a real romance. that scene makes it seems like she’s only with him because she wasn’t given any other choice.

this fits with the pattern of nearly every romantic possibility she is given. in season 1, she’s into merlin, but he’s not interested so it goes nowhere. fine. that on its own isn’t an issue. but then in season 2, she’s into lancelot, but that relationship ends by his choice, not hers. in seasons 2 and 3, her relationship with arthur continues only as and when arthur deems it safe to pursue her. we’re never shown her initiating romantic contact whenever she wants it. in season 3, she does at least get to politely reject gwaine’s advances, though it takes several rejections before he’s willing to give up. in season 4, she’s non-consensually forced into attraction for zombie lancelot.

the writers seem afraid to depict gwen as someone with romantic agency. and they went out of their way not to show her actively pursuing a romance with lancelot once arthur had settled on her as the object of his affection. nearly every romantic interaction she is given is dictated by the decision of the man she is interacting with. it’s honestly kind of disturbing once you notice the pattern.

[crystaiskiess]

Okay, first, I had planned to post something today in honor of s3 (!!!) (another one of those scene + show edits) but didn’t have the time, but I’m going to make one like this week (maybe end up using scenes from this chapter because aaaa).  Second, I have so many thoughts about this chapter that I’m going to leave a comment on it on ao3.  So, here are my aaaaa thoughts and my ao3 comment will probably actually sound coherent lol.

The relationships!!!  I love how you write relationships in their complexities.  Morgana and Arthur’s relationship being a focus in this really fits, especially the difference in the beginning versus the end.

All he could feel was her absence. They were like two pieces of cotton woven to make a string, his life does not exist if not alongside hers. Even when they were not directly interacting he would see her at every moment throughout the day. Now, her empty seat at dinner seems to dominate the space, consuming his attention, memories of her in the halls and his chambers haunt him like a ghost. The one time he dared to go to her chambers the emptiness felt like an aching wound. Morgana entered his life when he was five years old, he doesn’t know a time when she wasn’t in the castle with him. She has always been a sister to him, and he misses her like a limb.

That being in the first four paragraphs, god my heart was being torn out of my chest already.  I knew the chapter would hurt, but I hadn’t been expecting it to hurt that fast.  I sat down, finally able to read after running errands, and was immediately kicked in the chest at full force.  Then we have Morgana’s perspective later, and once again, kicked in the chest.

Morgana looks up from the cauldron with a start. “Not Arthur.”

That one line had me have to stop for a second because I love the dynamic.  They love each other so very dearly that they see each other as siblings without even knowing they’re siblings.  Often times, we don’t get to see that explored in fics because it’s kind of hard to know in canon.  Or at least my opinion because we don’t understand if Morgana has entirely changed or there’s still some “good” (for a lack of a better word) left in her.

I will say that Gwen’s pov of Morgana actually made me want to sob.�� Honestly, your writing just makes me feel all the emotions of the characters, so it’s not surprising that they’re in some distress that I’m in distress.  As I’ve said before, you have such a strength in emotion writing.  If you have any tips, please share because I’m always blown away every time I read OAFK (which has been several times). 

Where Gwen had once kept careful distance, Morgana pulled her in with both hands into her open arms. They grew beyond the role of maid and mistress, developing a true friendship that Gwen cherishes more than most other things in her life.

I’m trying to not like quote it too much, because it makes these get so long but it’s these two sentences that just started off their established relationship and getting ready to see what it is now.  Also, the knowledge of how Morgana feels/felt for Gwen doesn’t make it hurt but does at the same time.  I’m pretty sure it’s chapter nine where we’re introduced to Morgana’s love for Gwen, but it’s chapter thirteen where she thinks that Gwen knows she loves her (or maybe I misinterpreted that).  They both love each other so deeply, regardless of if in different ways, and seeing that fall apart a little just hurts.  It hurts Gwen, so it hurts me.

I have many thoughts and feelings about Morgana and Merlin, but that will make this probably 2k+ words long, and I’ll just do it in a comment on the chapter!  Also, do not feel bad about changing the update schedule!!!  You take the time you need to update!  There’s nearly 300k words currently, we can just reread it a million times.  It’s fun because you get to see more and more details every time!

HELLO !! im so sorry it took me so long to get to this, i read it immediately but it made me so happy i truly didn't know how to respond (also genuinely squealed over your ao3 comment too, you dont know how much it means to read analysis about my work i love it so much thank you)

morgana and arthur's dynamic is truly one of the most important things to me so im so glad you enjoyed this chapter and how i addressed them, i feel like the idea of her turning truly on arthur seems impossible to me when he technically had done nothing to her yet to make her feel betrayed, so it was important to me to show how much they love each other (this may come to hurt teehee)

and yes gwen and morgana !!!! the tragedy of what happens to them shouldnt be overlooked and there's absolutely more of that to come so look forward to that 👀

and thank you for your kind words about the update schedule !! it means a lot, it wasn't my ideal situation but id much rather continue posting regularly and just more spaced apart than have to hiatus so its the way it has to be !!

seriously thank you from the bottom of my heart for your kind comments and all your thoughts i keep coming back to them it just makes me so happy !! and thank you again for reading !!

[weakforarwen]

Valiant

I’ve never been able to understand why Arthur, the Prince, has only one servant who is expected to do everything. Muck out the horses? Don’t they have people working at the stables for that? Sharpen Arthur’s sword? Don’t they have people at the armory in charge of the upkeep of the weaponry and armor? Making Arthur his meals? What are the kitchen cooks for? It makes no sense. 

This episode marked Merlin’s first day as a servant/babysitter to the royal prat. How cute! Arthur liked Merlin quite a bit already, especially because Merlin acted as Arthur’s personal cheerleader and hated Valiant for him. Arthur trusted Merlin too. He trusted Merlin’s words that Valiant was using magic.

I thought it was funny how Merlin managed to convince Arthur though. Hie said: “I know I'm just a servant and my word doesn't count for anything.”. Gwen used similar words to make Arthur listen to her in The Witchfinder (“I know I’m only a servant”), and even Morgana told Arthur “It doesn't matter what I think.”, in The Poisoned Chalice, to get Arthur to do the right thing. 

Arthur believed everyone’s life had worth so, whenever someone reminded him of their lower status, Arthur practically felt obligated to listen to them. He needed to show people that he valued everyone equally and that he wouldn’t just ignore someone’s word because they weren’t noble or it wasn’t “appropriate”. 

I don’t believe it was always intentional, but it was really a foolproof way of getting through to Arthur, and it’s funny that everyone in Arthur's inner circle (Gwen, Merlin, Morgana) did it at one point. 

But I felt bad for Arthur when he accused Valiant in front of the King and was utterly humiliated for trusting a servant. Uther’s such an asshole. He actually believed Arthur would try to talk himself out of fighting? Arthur?? And then poor Merlin got fired. But, still, the music that played during the part where Arthur felt betrayed and humiliated by Merlin’s actions was unnecessarily dramatic. Season 1 had a lot of moments like these. Even during the match between Arthur and Valiant the music which played when he won was so over the top.

You kind of have to feel bad about Arthur. He fought Valiant knowing Merlin was telling the truth and he might die, simply because it was his duty. Arthur had to show his people he was willing to fight, even if he had to die to prove his point. It was about more than pride and honor to Arthur, more than getting “all the girls and the glory” as Merlin put it (not that Morgana was a really a girl to Arthur). Leading by example was the cornerstone of Arthur’s philosophy as Prince and King.

On a lighter note, Morgana and Arthur were hilarious. I know I probably only feel this way because I’ve seen the entire show, but their weird mating ritual was so funny. They looked genuinely disinterested in each other, yet couldn’t stand the idea of the other not wanting them so they would bicker and provoke each other endlessly. 

Arthur may not have wanted Morgana, but the thought of her preferring Valiant over him hurt his pride, especially when Morgana was so obvious about trying to make him jealous. And Arthur’s generally indifferent attitude towards Morgana bothered her too. They were hilariously petty, really. When I first watched the show and knew nothing of Gwen, or Gwen and Arthur, I thought the sexual undertones to Morgana and Arthur’s interactions felt wrong. Looking back, maybe it was because the actors didn’t have a particularly sexual or romantic type of chemistry. When Morgana was helping Arthur with his armor before the match with Valiant, he didn’t look affected by her presence. But there was still something inherently intimate about the whole process, and Morgana was looking up at Arthur coyly too, so the scene just felt off to me, like the writers’ intent didn’t match Morgana and Arthur. Likewise, when Arthur escorted Morgana to the feast, he didn’t look interested, despite the dialogue, and when they began bickering it felt more like a sibling fight than anything. 

Also, Merlin really stole a castle statue in broad daylight... 

[make-me-imagine]

Hiya! Congrats on the milestone! Could I get a ship (any gender is fine!) from Star Trek and Merlin please? I’m 5’1 and a bit chubby. I have pale skin, green eyes, long blonde hair, and freckles across my nose. I’m pretty quiet when I first meet someone, as I want to figure out what kind of person before I really interact with them. Once I do open up, however, be prepared for awful jokes, weird movie/book/fanfic recommendations, and more baked goods than any one person should ever eat in their lifetime. I’m the type of person that worries so much about other people, that I often have difficulty putting myself first and end up forgetting to take care of myself (which is something I’m actively working on.) I adore sewing, cross stitch, puzzles, writing, learning new information (typically space or mythology related), and everything horror related. I also have five German shepherds that I adore to bits. Once again congrats on the milestone!! ❤️

For Others: Ships are now Closed!

---

Thank you!~ Hope you like them!

Star Trek:

I ship you with Sam Kirk!

Why: Might be an odd choice, but I think he really loves being around you as he would find you very comforting and pleasant to talk too. He loves dogs, and loves that you have so many interests and hobbies. (He would also LOVE your freckles). Also, you bake? Amazing, he loves that.

Confession: You two started out as work friends, became real friends, and then your relationship naturally flowed into romantic. Your hang-outs and dinners kept getting more personal, and lasting longer, until you both had this moment of 'oh', and your relationship formed. (Much to the NOT surprise of everyone on board).

Best-Friend: Tilly! Crossover! You two knew each other all throughout the academy, and have always been close. She brings out your more bubbly and smiley side. Together, you two are the "sunshine team" and everyone loves you.

There are like no gifs of him from SNW. And he looks SO different without the mustache lol.

----------

Merlin:

I ship you with Merlin!

Why: He would find you to be a breath of fresh air after having to deal with the Knights and Arthur all the time. You would be his safe space, and any time he would see you, a big smile would cross his face. You are the perfect type to him. Talented, shy yet kind, hidden personality he sometimes only gets to see, etc..

Confession: You found out he had magic, and he was afraid you would turn him in or be scared of him. But you kept his secret, and were extremely interested and in awe of him. Learning this, he could not keep his feelings hidden anymore and told you that he was terrified you would not accept him and that he would lose you forever. After sharing how he felt fr you, you told him the same, and that was the beginning of your relationship (and a lot of adventures).

Best-Friend: Gwen! You two grew up together and have been inseparable besties since you were children.

Other: Not long into yours and Merlins relationship, you discovered you had a little magic yourself when you were reading a simple spell from one of his books and made a chair float (that Gaius may or may not have been in at the time...oops).

xx

[none-ofthisnonsense]

Merlin S3E6, “The Changeling”

That’s a cute baby, and a pretty room!

Are those the Sidhe again?

2 episodes after the longest pre-credits scene, I’m fairly sure we’ve just gotten the shortest.

With Miriam Margolyes? Ohh I’m excited now!

They seem like a chill family?

Uther is trying to set Arthur up isn’t he. I love bumbling Uther. 

Ouch, Elena isn’t making the best first impression…

Arthur has a true talent in making an arse of himself.

PFFFFT THE PILLOW AND UTHER

Okay I don’t trust that nanny anymore.

So it is the Sidhe!

She rides well!

Honestly she’s nice! I like her! She seems normal. If clumsy.

Is Grunhilda making eyes at Gaius?? (She is. And INTENSELY flirting.) Gaius’ reaction is the best part.

Ok maybe Elena’s a bit weird.

Gaius chides Merlin for getting into trouble, but really, he’s the instigator.

HIS FACE

I do believe Morgana likes Gwen. 

“It’s the last one we’ve looked at and by the ancient laws of sod, it must provide an answer.” THE DEADPAN DELIVERY

Gwen is braver than I am.

Elena’s hair changes from one shot to the next. I don’t usually notice these things, but this is particularly obvious.

We need sleep shirt Merlin more often.

I like this episode’s interactions between Arthur and Merlin. Actually, Merlin in this episode is just such a delight. I love the “I think you’re mad, I think you’re all mad, people should marry for love.” I don’t know what it is but the delivery and the lines and all of it probably make it one of my favourite Merlin moments. (Well, him in all this episode is one of my favourite Merlin moments.)

Morgana sort of looks like a dragon. 

Arthur gets a friend! I like that :)

It’s sunny for once! This episode is just happy :)

[tsuzuruchipalace]

consider the following: what if merlin decided to control lancelot when he first met him instead of king arthur and mordred

oooh this is a really cool idea!! i think this could make for an interesting alternative storyline! As much as I love the story of KniRou IV, I also want more Merlin and Lancelot interactions lol

forgive me for the details since I just skimmed through KniRou again, but in the original story, I believe Merlin started targeting King Arthur even before Lancelot showed up because he was trying to usurp the throne and take over the kingdom. Lancelot didn't seem to be in his sights at all. Then, because Lancelot defeated him and stopped his plans, their cross-game rivalry began (to our assumption, anyway)

Since Lancelot is a child blessed by the fairies, Merlin would've had a much harder time trying to control him. (I assume this since Gwen's fairy magic seemed to be effective against Merlin's demonic magic in the fight.) That's why he sent Lancelot and Gawain away to find the Holy Water while he was slowly taking control of King Arthur in the guise of illness, probably to make sure they wouldn't interfere with the process. Realistically, I think Merlin was not counting on Lancelot to be so loyal to Gwen or as strong as he was, so he didn’t consider him a threat until he was defeated.

-

BUT, if Merlin were to use Lancelot to take over the Kingdom, I think he'd have to emotionally manipulate Lancelot in order to lower his defenses. Merlin recognizes that Lancelot is blessed by fairies and sees Gwen from the moment they meet. The first step would be to separate them, either by force or by turning them against each other somehow. Of course, Lancelot would try to find or mend things with her, but I’m sure Merlin could keep Gwen hidden somewhere for a while.

The second step would be to turn Gawain and Lancelot against each other. Based on the actual play events, it would not be hard to stage something to make Gawain hate him, such as hurting/killing Gareth and blaming it on Lancelot again. Since Gawain is an established knight and Lancelot is new, the King would probably side with Gawain, maybe even casting Lancelot out of the kingdom if Merlin still had some control over him.

Finally, Merlin, still posing as the wise and mild-mannered king’s aid, would step in pretending to be Lancelot’s only remaining ally and emotional support when he feels like everything has been taken from him. In that moment of weakness, Merlin could attempt to take control of him. If he succeeds, then Merlin could frame it as Lancelot acting out in revenge and nobody would wiser as to the real reason. But Gwen could still escape and bring Lancelot out of the mind control, still ending in a happy ending for the heroes and continuing the story.

Of course that’s only one way to reinterpret it! and perhaps a bit dramatic as well lmao. Merlin could also slowly befriend Lancelot and manipulate him behind the scenes without magic. The power of friendship is strong and, in some cases, can be used to make people do things they normally wouldn’t. Lancelot could do things in Merlin’s favor that he wouldn’t realize are harmful until it’s revealed much later. It would cool to see them getting along, yet knowing that Merlin’s intentions are dark and for personal gain despite the seemingly good friendship. With a reveal of betrayal, it would add conflicting emotions between the two.

This approach gives Merlin more screen time and depth to his character. It also explores a would-be friendship more, giving more of a character dynamic-driven story than a plot-based one. I personally think this approach would really interesting in driving the emotions and motivations behind the actions of these two characters in other games further down the timeline. While I really like the idea of this approach, it seems just a little outside of the realm of reality since KniRou IV is supposed to be a more simple and theme-grounding installment of the series.

Overall, I really like the concept of Merlin controlling Lancelot! (perhaps some of that is my tsuzuru and tsuzuita bias talking...) It could go a lot of ways. And ultimately, it would reframe a lot of the series moving forward. (I say when we have no confirmed direction as to how the other KniRou stories play out). Personally, I get big Cloud-Sethiroth vibes from them, which I’m sure is partly intentional, so I’d love to see Lancelot and Merlin having a more complex and hateful relationship than what is shown to us so far. (crossing my fingers for tsuzuita knirou sequel play)

Of course, that’s just my interpretation of how I think that’d go down. I’d love to hear other takes on it!

-

Hope you don’t mind the long answer anon! I didn’t expect to go on for so long with a whole alternate plot, but I just really like KniRou haha. Thanks for the ask! I had fun thinking of these ideas 💖💕💕

[botanicallyinclinednerd]

Moments that highlight Merlin and Gwaine’s dynamic:

3x04: Gwaine's first words directly to Merlin are "pass the jug" which Merlin does and he just stares as Gwaine drinks from it and punches a guy in the face with no problem.

3x04: Gwaine flirting asking Merlin for his name and introducing himself to Merlin in the middle of a bar fight (that he threw the first punch of because he saw Arthur and Merlin had gotten themselves into a predicament). Merlin is completely baffled by this man that bashed someone over the head with a pitcher of alcohol, commented on the waste of alcohol, and threw himself back into the thick of the fight with a flip of his hair

3x04: Merlin has no idea how to react to Gwaine and his attitude towards nobles or his reason for helping them in the tavern being due to their slim odds of winning

3x04: Merlin’s stunned exasperation at Gwaine’s bar tab

3x04: Drunk Gwaine telling Merlin as he helps him up the stairs to his bed, "You're the best friend I've ever had" and Merlin replying "you seem to have quite a few" and laughing at Gwaine’s drunken laughter. They then exchange bits of their tragic backstories. Gwaines laughter at hitting his head against the wall sets Merlin off again, laughing at Gwaine’s antics.

3x04: the conversation about fathers while cleaning the boots. If I'm not mistaken, Gwaine is the only person, Gaius aside, that Merlin ever talked to about Balinor after having briefly met him.

3x04: Gwaine getting concerned when Merlin doesn't come back quickly and going to find him. Gwaine asking Merlin if he's okay and upon getting a "no" from Merlin, readily fighting the two "knights" to protect Merlin

3x04: Merlin apologizing for Gwaine getting banished and when Gwaine brushes it off and says "People get sick of me too quickly" Merlin quickly replies "I didn't" and Gwaine seems surprised by this: "After the trouble I caused?" And he laughs at Merlins response "you livened the place up." Gwaine gives Merlin a pat on the shoulder and a smile/nod in farewell.

3x04: Merlin grinning as he recognizes Gwaine’s disarming maneuver on one if the thug knights.

3x04: Merlin expressing concern at Gwaine saying he might go to Mercia. Merlin proceeds to try to convince Gwaine to stay. Like the first time in the episode Gwaine says good bye, Gwaine claps Merlin on the shoulder and gives him a nod and a smile. It also looks like he winks at Merlin as well this time.

3x08: Merlin grinning when he greets Gwaine when he finds him in a bar brawl. Gwaine looks and sounds delighted to see Merlin, grinning back. Ignores the fight to greet Merlin, the shot changing to show Gwaine with his arm around Merlin shoulders

3x08:The whole escape scene is amazing, the music adding to the hilarity. Gwaine, like any good friend, shrugging and pushing Merlin off the wall into the hay bellow

3x08: Them laughing over Merlin searching every tavern in Angard for Gwaine and Gwaine replying he'd be in all of them

3x08: Campfire scene in the Perilous lands. Merlin asks Gwaine why he wants to help and Gwaine responds "Same reason as you. To help a friend," and when Merlin says "Arthur is lucky to have us" Gwaine replies "Not Arthur," while looking at merlin with this look on his face and giving Merlin a tiny smile. Merlin responds "I'd do the same for you," "I'd hope so. You're the only friend I've got." Merlin raises his eyebrows at that "I'm not surprised" and they both laugh

3x08: Gwaine pushing Merlin into the room out of the way of the descending stone wall

3x08: Gwaine pulling Merlin into a hug when they find Merlin unharmed in the room. Its a very bro-y hug with back slaps

3x08: Merlin smiles at Gwaine and thanks him for his help as they part ways at the border.

3x12: Gwaine started moving towards Merlin and Arthur after he heard Merlin’s voice, meaning he recognized it. Merlin is delighted to see Gwaine, grinning widely. Gwaine calls Merlin "old friend" and puts his hands on Merlin's shoulders

3x12: Merlin telling Gwaine what their quest is and Arthur getting annoyed because it was a secret and Merlins response is "Its Gwaine!"

3x12: The fire wood bit where Gwaine messes with Merlin and Merlin doesn't realize it. "Merlin, don't you know when someone's joking with you?" Merlin laughs. Gwaine then makes a quip about his reputation and winks at Merlin

3x13: Gwaine asks Merlin if he's alright, comments that it looked like Merlin had seen a ghost

4x01: when Merlin spots Gwaine and Percival chicken fishing from the grate, Gwaine puts a finger to his lips with a grin. Merlin is amused by their antics

4x02: Gwaine gives Merlin a hug when he rejoins them before the Isle of the Blessed

4x04: Gwaine compliments Merlin on the stew and thanks him while putting a hand on Merlin’s shoulder

4x04: the poisoned stew scene, Gwaine obnoxiously eats over Merlin shoulder and pats Merlin on the shoulder while Merlin is probably plotting his revenge against all 5 of them

4x06: Gwaine goes with Arthur to find Merlin and he talks up Merlin to Arthur. Can be inferred that Gwaine is indirectly telling Arthur to praise Merlin more. Gwaine can be seen grinning in the background when he and Arthur find Merlin

4x06: Gwaine calls Merlin "bog man" and looks hurt when Merlin refuses to let him snag any of the food and snaps at him.

4x06: Old man Merlin antagonizing Gwaine, alluding to his nobility without actually saying it. Merlin’s motivations behind this taunt are unclear

4x07: Gwaine is waiting for Merlin in Gaius’s chambers to check on him. Merlin is not happy to see him and is at first rather snappy. Gwaine seems a bit hurt by Merlin's dismissal, but he still lets Merlin know he's there to help him. Gwaine goes with Merlin to find Gaius

4x07 deleted scene: Gwaine and Merlin stop to eat around a fire. Gwaine assures Merlin that they will find Gaius and Merlin thanks him for the help. Merlin promises to return the favor one day and Gwaine makes a joke about Merlin maybe regretting that considering all the trouble he gets into. They laugh and then have a short heart to heart about fathers. (This scene can be found on YouTube under Merlin "4x07 deleted scenes")

4x07: when Gwaine is knocked to the ground by his opponent, Merlin used magic to knock him off his feet and he ended up landing on Gwaine. Gwaine is staring up at Merlin with wide eyes. Merlin helps Gwaine to his feet

4x07: Gwaine looks very displeased when Merlin tells Gwaine not to wait for him if he finds Gaius. Gwaine ends up trying to go looking for Merlin anyways but is talked out of it by Agravaine (btw Gwaine looks like he wants so badly to stab Agravaine in that scene on multiple occasions and I think its a shame that he didn't)

4x08: The fishing pole interaction in the night. The light banter

4x08: if you watch Gwaine in the background of the scene where Leon goes off on Merlin and calls him "nothing but a servant" you can see Gwaine looking livid and a muscle jumps in his jaw. The next scene when he shoves into Leon he asks Leon "why don’t you mind your damn tongue?" Which doesn't connect to Leon telling Gwaine to mind where he's going. It does however connect to Leon yelling at Merlin.

4x10: Gwaine scaring Merlin in the shrine by suddenly grabbing his shoulder and whispering "boo"

4x10: Gwaine giving Merlin a pouch of salt as protection against spirits and telling him if it didn't work, gaius could use it as seasoning. Merlin isn't amused by that

4x12: Gwaine pulls Merlin back and tells him they had no time to argue, Merlin needed to go.

5x02: Merlin smiles when he sees Gwaine alive

5x04: Gwaine is concerned for Merlin when he’s found unconscious, helping Percival lay him down and sitting by Merlin's head with his hands on Merlin's shoulders. He expresses concern to Gaius when Merlin takes too long to wake up

5x04: Gwaine is delighted to see Merlin awake and definitely goes in for a hug which Merlin derails by putting his hands on Gwaine’s shoulders and moving away before Gwaine can hug him. In the background Gwaine does a little smirk and head shake and Merlin back to his normal self

5x04: Before Merlin goes off to find Arthur, Gwaine stops him with a hand on his shoulder, wishing him luck

5x07: Merlin’s conversation with Gwaine about his suspicion that Arthur was not safe in Camelot. Gwaine promises Merlin that he will stick close to Arthur to protect him. He gives merlin his word.

5x07: connecting to the point above: Gwaine goes to check on Gwen when they lost the "intruder" if you really over analyze this scene and the scene in the courtyard, you could come to the conclusion that Gwaine is aware Merlin is in the room. His eyes keep darting to the corner where Merlin is and in fact its Gwaine looking in that direction that tips Gaius off to Merlin in that corner. When the previous point is taken into account, it is doubtful that Gwaine would have left Arthur unless he had reason to believe he was in more danger if he stayed than if he went with Gwen. But this is conjecture on my part and just what I took away from these scenes.

5x07: Gwaine smiles kindly at Merlin when he’s let out of the cells

5x11: Gwaine chuckling and commenting that Merlin had caught something on the hunting trip too (a cold)

5x11: Gwaine asking Merlin what was wrong after he and Leon encounter Mordred threatening Merlin in the hallway. Gwaine looks slightly concerned, especially after Merlin brushes it off and claims it was nothing.

5x12: Gwaine’s confidence in Merlins healing ability: "don't worry, Merlin knows what he’s doing"

5x12: Gwaine going with "my friend Merlin" to the crystal caves. That Merlin chose Gwaine speaks to his trust in him, and that he agreed readily speaks to Gwaine’s friendship to Merlin

5x12: Gwaine thanking Merlin for helping Eria, Merlin implying that Gwaine likes her, light teasing

5x12: Merlin lying defenseless on the ground and screaming for Gwaine, sounding absolutely petrified. Gwaine was already moving to Merlin before he yelled, as he noticed when Merlin went down. Gwaine asks him if he's okay and holds a hand out to help Merlin to his feet. Merlin thanks him and Gwaine replies, while clapping a hand on Merlin’s shoulder "No need to thank me Merlin. It was the least I could do."

5x12: Gwaine is taken aback when Merlin tells him that he will go the rest of the way on his own. Gwaine is concerned for Merlin’s safety. When Gwaine asks what Merlin is looking for, Merlin has a conflicted look on his face before he ultimately replies "I can't tell you that Gwaine. You'll just have to trust me" and Gwaine obviously does, as he does not push or protest and he gives a tiny nod of understanding.

5x12: Gwaine tells Merlin "Look after yourself Merlin" and gives Merlin his sword, making a joke about Merlin knowing how to use the sharp end that makes them both chuckle. When the shot shows Gwaine again, his eyes are filling with tears. They firmly grasp each other's arm in farewell

5x12: Gwaine tells Merlin "I hope you find what you're looking for" to which Merlin grins broadly at Gwaine and Gwaine smiles back, though it quickly fades as the tears in his eyes get more prominent and he actively looks like he's trying not to cry. Gwaine looks like he doesn't expect to see Merlin again. And he's right. "I hope you find what you're looking for" are Gwaine’s last words to Merlin.

Also: for the fucking record, the music playing in their final scene makes it so much more heart breaking. It starts off quieter and slow and at the end, at their goodbye, it swells and just has a feeling of finality to it without there being a proper ending.

[morganas-destiny]

One thing I love most about the "You're not Merlin" scene from 'A servant of two masters' is the fact that it's basically a callback to Merlin and Morgana in 1x01. A royal getting completely naked behind the changing screen, talking to who they think is their servant but is actually their sibling's servant (or soon-to-be servant in Merlin's case and past servant in Gwen's case). And it just makes me think, you know, like what if Morgana had like Arthur walked out, naked, to look at Gwen, only to find Merlin standing there? The logical answer would likely be a lot of screaming, quick hiding and yelling for guards, especially since she didn't know him yet. But the much funnier option would be if she reacted the same way as Arthur. Just having her brain short circuit for a moment and then going "You're not Gwen". And Merlin being like "No. No, I'm not" (I was just gonna leave it at that but I had some time to spare and wrote a little OneShot to go with it lol. Enjoy.)

Why me, was all Merlin could think. Well, that and I should have knocked. He had almost been able to sneak out of the chambers of the Lady Morgana unnoticed, after trying to imitate her maid's voice and hiding behind a dress and whatnot to avoid being caught. But of course, of course, she had decided that she wanted to speak to her maid, and friend, face to face. She had walked out from behind the changing screen and locked eyes with Merlin. And as if that hadn't been bad enough, she had still not been dressed. The king's ward just walked out on him, completely nude. Merlin silently said goodbye to his life because surely, she would scream for the guards to take him to the dungeons and soon after to the chopping block because being caught in the same room as the naked ward of the king would surely cost him head. However, that wasn't what happened. She gave a surprised yelp and grabbed behind the screen, pulling out the gown she had taken off beforehand and pressing it against her body to cover the most important parts. She stared at him wide-eyed and in his quiet panic, all Merlin could do was stare back. A few second ticked by, in which neither said anything. Then Morgana narrowed her eyes. "You're not Gwen.", she stated the obvious. Merlin blinked a few times. "Errr... no. No, I- I just-" His thoughts raced, trying to figure out how to properly explain what exactly was going on. That he never meant to spy on her or get into this situation. His eyes fell on the sleeping draught he had brought and hastily went to pick it up, almost dropping it in the process. "I just came to deliver this. I- I'm new, I came to live with Gaius and- well." He interrupted himself, because he started to trip over his own words and also because he knew; every new word only made it seem more and more like a weak excuse. He could only hope and pray now that the Lady Morgana believed him and would let him go with a warning. "Oh.", she just said though. Oh? Merlin didn't know what to do with that. He gulped, placing the little bottle back on the wooden surface and averted his eyes. His cheeks were flushing more intensely with each passing second. He could feel Morgana's gaze on him. "Do you know where she is? Gwen, I mean.", she asked. Merlin dared to look up again, then slowly shook his head. "Hm.", Morgana only hummed in response. Merlin felt close to a mental breakdown. He wished the girl would just do something. Anything. Shout at him, tell him to get out, for god's sake, at this point, he'd even willingly let the guards take him to the dungeons. Even if he would hate to do that to Gaius. Though losing his head was almost a welcome idea, compared to the terrible uncertainty of this moment. Finally, after what felt like ages, the Lady Morgana opened her mouth again. "I would like to get dressed now." Merlin wanted to cry in relief. He could go. He could go and hopefully forget this incredibly awkward, embarrassing interaction. But no, he'd rejoiced to soon. "Are you familiar with fastenings?" He blinked in surprise and confusion, not realising what she wanted from him. He thought about it. Well, growing up with only a mother meant he had helped with a dress here and there at times. Though he doubted that the simple dresses of his mother were anything in comparison to the expensive, extravagant gowns of a princess. In his helplessness and under the scrutinizing eyes of the Lady Morgana, he only shrugged. "A little." Morgana nodded, as if to say good enough. "Wait there." Merlin's eyes widened and with rising panic, he watched as Morgana disappeared behind the changing screen again. The rustling of fabric indicated that she was putting on her other dress. Nervous sweat dampened the little hairs of Merlin's hairline. This couldn't possinly be really happening. "Alright, you can come.", her voice exclaimed from behind the screen. Merlin's heart near dropped into his pants but he didn't really know what else to do than listen. So, he walked over on wobbly knees and peeked behind the screen.

Upon seeing his cautious gaze, Morgana tilted her head. "Come on. My maid's obviously not here but you are. And considering you're fully dressed, you have an unfair advantage which I can't really allow." Feisty. Unusual for a girl of her standing but Merlin wasn't going to object. He just nodded and lifted his trembling hands to brush away some of her hair, which was even softer to the touch than it looked, and began to fiddle with the fastening. It took him twice as long as necessary and something definitely looked a bit off but he figured it would have to do and stepped back. Morgana shook her hair so that the long locks could freely flow down her body again. "Thank you.", she simply said, but a small smile danced around her lips. "Hm-mhm.", was all Merlin was able to get out. "My lady?" Both of them turned their heads to the door, through which Gwen had just entered, appearing to be rather confused at Merlin's presence. "Gwen!", Morgana greeted cheerily. Then she noticed the way her maid eyed Merlin. "Gwen, this is..." She trailed off, realising that she had never actually learned the name of the stranger who had shown up in her chambers. "Merlin.", he helped out. "But, uh, we know each other." He motioned between himself and Gwen. "Really?" Gwen nodded, hardly able to surpress a giggle. "We met while he was in the stocks." Morgana seemed bewildered for a moment, thinking that she had apparently allowed a criminal to help her with her dress. Gwen, who sensed her mistress's change of mood, quickly went to add: "He's the one who stood up to Arthur." Instantly, the other girl's face lit up again. "Oh, you are?" Merlin rubbed his neck, flustered. "Well..." "He's too humble. I saw it myself. It was very brave.", Gwen grinned, coming closer to the other two. Morgana looked at him with a smirk and a twinkle in her eye. "My, my, so Camelot's very own newest hero helped me with my fastening. I'm honored." The pink in Merlin's cheeks turned bright red. "I-", he croaked out. "I should probably go. Gaius- Gaius is probably waiting for me." Morgana laughed quietly. "You may go." He resisted the urge to exhale in relief and promptly marched towards the door with large steps. "Bye, Merlin.", Morgana's voice sounded one more time behind him. Despite his better instincts, he turned around once more and of course, ran into the doorframe. The two girls stiffled their laughter. Merlin let out a short, nervous chuckle and slipped out into the hallway. As soon as he was out, he allowed himself to breathe again. He wasn't sure how he'd managed to get out of that situation alive but he was glad he did. He just hoped he wouldn't have to step under the Lady Morgana's eyes again soon. Of course he didn't know yet that with his luck, he would earn an official job in the castle as Prince Arthur's manservant just a few hours later.

[merlinmagicmania]

I'm new to the Merlin fandom (I'm at the end of season 4 but I already know how season 5 ends...) and I'm totally enraptured and frustrated by this show! I wonder: how did you cope all these years with the finale? Do you have your own headcanons on a possible better ending? I don't mind if you publish this! ^^

Hello hello!! Welcome to the fandom and thanks for the ask! I understand your sentiment bc I’m in the same boat! This answer has multiple parts and is a little long, so here goes:

I have a love-hate relationship with the finale. On the one hand, I love how tragically beautiful the show can be sometimes, especially how there were multiple points in time where one action could have rewritten events but the characters would never make a decision different from the ones they initially chose - in this case, it really becomes a tragedy and I find that poetically enchanting even if it’s not satisfying. And on the other hand - denial works!

I think it’s fun to reimagine how things could’ve gone differently if one of those decisions were changed. And I love the characters and the banter, so I just generally enjoy scrolling through the merlin content. And most of the time I pretend the finale never happened unless I want angst.

As for reimagining, I really think for the best possible ending, where all my favorite characters are alive and happy, the events of The Fires of Idirsholas would have to change. I think there were several turning points after that episode, and Morgana may have been brought back to the light in season 3 (whether through Merlin, Gwen, Arthur, or her own brain reminding her that Gwen and Arthur hadn’t betrayed her), but it would’ve taken a more drastic change. And Morgana was the main reason everything went wrong later in the show.

Morgana is obviously responsible for her own actions, and she has agency in her rage (although I think she was a bit ooc in hurting everyone in Camelot, especially Gwen and innocent civilians), but I still feel like Merlin poisoning her was a turning point that kept her from trusting anyone else. The interactions she had with Merlin in The Nightmare Begins and her perspective of things from The Moment of Truth both showed him to be sympathetic to magic users. And to have the one person she thought she could trust poison her, seemingly for no reason other than unfounded suspicion towards a magic user, could’ve been an indication to her that no one would trust her if they knew the truth. And if they were going to turn her into the evil witch, then she’d play her role well. And I really think Merlin just saying something along the lines of, “I found a book in Gaius’s study saying this is a spell that affects magic users and non-magic users alike and only the anchor would remain unaffected. This means the only way to break the spell is for the anchor to die.” would’ve been enough to turn the course of the whole show. Bc the Morgana at that time was kindhearted and would’ve gladly given her life to save others. She would’ve resented being used as a pawn and she would have even done something along the lines of Gaius’s or Arthur’s temporary deaths to sever the spell. And I think from there she and Arthur would fight a lot about magic, and Arthur remaining open-minded would’ve provided more windows for Merlin to reveal his secret. Or maybe not, but there would be fewer things going wrong and Arthur and several knights would no longer be set on a direct course for death without Morgana fulfilling her destined role.

Spoilers for the season finale: But as for a shorter immediate episode fix, I like to imagine that Merlin called Kilgarrah earlier, Arthur got to the lake in time, and Gwaine was taken to Gaius to be treated and survived. This is pretty consistent with other fans’ imaginings. Another option would’ve been for Arthur to make the right choice with the Disir. Unfortunately, the earlier version still leaves Lancelot, Elyan, and Mordred dead, and in my ideal headcannon, everybody lives! Mordred and Merlin are sassy to each other through mind-speak, Morgana is still verbally brutal to anyone who crosses her, Gwen is a gorgeous queen who sees more than she lets on, Lancelot is over Merlin’s chaotic shit and Gwaine is starting to suspect magic, the other knights and Arthur are still oblivious, and eventually Merlin’s magic gets revealed, creating a snowball effect into every other secret of his being revealed, the magic ban is repealed, and everyone lives happily ever after!

There are so many ways I feel like this show could’ve gone differently, and since secret identities/ secret powers is one of my favorite tropes, I really like reimagining things with an earlier magic reveal in mind as well. I have thousands of unwritten fanfics in my head for all the different possibilities, and I think that’s part of the reason I’m still a consistent fan. Content creators keep me consistently invested with all the magic reveal fics, memes, art, and head-cannons as well, of which I am incredibly grateful for.

I think that’s probably enough alternate scenario’s for now lol. Thanks for the ask! And to you and anyone who’s reading this, I hope you have a lovely morning/afternoon/evening/night! 💕

[tink-wondering]

TITLE FOR THE THING FOR MERTHUR: I yearn for thee

So, I hope you will forgive me because here is the second proposal and it is mostly fluff... with a sprinkle of Gaius (sounds weird, but you'll see when you get to that part, wherein Gaius is also fluffy).

Same ask game as usual.

Here's a follow-up to yesterday's post (Pride & Prejudice AU, kinda)

Rated: Gen/T

Words: 999

I yearn for thee

“Lord Pendragon!” Merlin asks, surprised.

“What are you doing out here at this time?”

“I could not sleep.”

Merlin stares and stares and stares. How the new dawn has changed his perception of the man! He is glowing in the morning sun, his hair in disarray giving him a rambunctious look, opposite of his reputation, though he still seems unsure on how to act in Merlin’s presence.

“I could not either,” Lord Pendragon says slowly. “My night has been restless to say the least.”

Merlin doesn’t know how to respond to that, so he looks down. His outlook of Lord Pendragon may have changed, but the man will surely remember Merlin’s last words to him; he has kept his promise and minimized their interactions since then. Now, Merlin feels lost. How do you say to a man you have abhorred—and revealed outwardly such animosity—that your feelings have changed.

A gentle finger under his chin slowly tilts his head back up. “Am I so loathsome still that you can’t even look at me?”

“No, on the contrary!” Merlin breathes out, as lost as before but in a sea of blue this time. Lord Pendragon’s eyes look at him with so much kindness and fondness still, he can barely believe it. “It should be you who refuses to look at me for I have been nothing but an insolent child towards you.”

“You have not,” Lord Pendragon counters. “You have done nothing but bring the best out of me, even calling me out on my haughty behaviour. And I must sincerely apologize for my proposal”—he chuckles, depreciating—“I have talked to Leon and Morgana about it, and my words were ill-conceived. I am not surprised they were received so poorly, but if there is any chance your feelings have changed since then, know that my affection and admiration towards you are still as strong and deep.” Merlin remains silent, unbelieving. “I know you have spoken to Lord du Bois last night, and it has lead me to hope. Your continued presence gives me faith, but one word from you will silence me forever.”

“Then, before your lips are sealed, you must know that not only my sentiments have changed, but my heart now beats only for you. You have brought my friend, my family and I so much joy. I must thank you!” Merlin says, almost in an afterthought amidst his confession. “I know of the kindness you have bestowed upon sweet Gwen and Lancelot by funding her dot. That is not mentioning the hand, I suspect, you have played into saving poor Gwaine and ensuring his reputation remains intact.”

“Mr. Emrys, please,” Lord Pendragon interrupts, sheepish. “I have done those things only with your happiness in mind. I am alarmed that you know of those happenings considering I tried to keep them silent, but once again, you are always the one I think of when I act. So, if your… inclination towards me is merely a product of my actions, then I thank you. However, none of my deeds where accomplished with the thought to trap you.”

“Trap me?” Merlin exclaims. “Lord Pendragon, I am indeed trapped. Though these bars have been construed out of my own folly. My heart beats for you because I have seen your kindness, your compassion, your—dare I say—love?”

“Say it all you want, Merlin,” he says hesitantly, but at Merlin’s nod, a smile overtakes his features. “Because you have bewitched me, and I love and love and love you. If I may be so bold, one more time, I do not wish to be parted from you from this day on.”

Merlin’s eyes fill with tears. He has never believed it Lord—Arthur, his mind says; Arthur, his soul screams; Arthur, his heart rejoices—would still feel the same.

Arthur very slowly, very gently—as though Merlin is a frightened bird—takes his face in his hands and leans down to press a tender kiss to his lips. Merlin catches his hands around his face and closes his eyes, and the kiss becomes passionate, emotions finally unraveled.

***

“Is this truly your heart’s desire?” Gaius asks him with a raised eyebrow.

“It is,” Merlin answers fervently. “It most ardently is!”

“I thought the man didn’t strike your fancy,” Gaius says with a fond smile.

“He did not at first, but I have misjudged him… so wrongly.” Merlin laughs at his own idiocy and prejudice. “He is nothing but a kind, gentle soul. A man whose heart is—and has always been—in the right place, despite is countenance saying otherwise. It is I who was too foolish to see past my enmity.”

“I am so glad you have finally found love, Merlin.” Gaius stands up, bones cracking, to hug him tightly. After a few seconds, he lets go to look at him, hands still bracketing his shoulders warmly, eyes a little misty. “I was starting to despair you would ever find happiness with another and be settled with an old man like me for the rest of your life.”

“It would have been my pleasure to stay by your side as long as needed.”

“I have raised four of you, and my wish has always been your happiness.” Gaius wipes the tears at the corner of his eyes, and with a laugh, he adds, “Now, let your gentleman in so I can speak with him. See if he is really worthy of you.”

“He is! More than anything else, and it is I who is not worthy.”

Merlin looks outside the window where Arthur is pacing back and forth amidst the chicken. He is a picture of nervousness, a side Merlin has never seen before. Or rather, a side he has never let himself see, knowing the moment he would find an ounce of humanity in the man, he would fall desperately, expeditiously and irrevocably in love.

And he did.

He still does.

A little more with every passing moment.

[theonceandfutureking6481]

BBC's Merlin Season 1 Episode 6: A Remedy to Cure All Ills Analysis

Spoilers for the show

This episode is interestingly about Gaius, it is his arc we see here, not Merlin's or Arthur's and so this is a very interesting episode to watch because it is a vision of the world of Uther, and a vision of Gaius' own flaws. It is a world Merlin and Arthur will one day change and redeem, but as of yet this is a story more about the past then the present.

Gaius

This is something I believe I will come back to later, I'm pretty sure there's another episode later on that also addresses this idea and that is Gaius' deeply flawed nature. We as an audience love Gaius, he's a good character and Merlin loves him like a father, so we can't really help but love him too. But Gaius is flawed in perhaps one of the most dangerous ways, he is not cruel or even a bad person in any real way, but he is a coward. He is the person who in the face of injustice stands by and does nothing. His flaw is in some ways the most understandable, at least for me, its hard to be brave and to oppose power is not easy. Gaius has been a coward and has been complicit in the pain and deaths of so many in his silence, although arguably there wasn't really anything he could of done to stop it. This is revealed most of all in an exchange he has with Kilgharrah (though the 'blind eye' is also mentioned with Edwin).

Gaius: I will not choose between them (Uther and Merlin)

Kilgharrah: Then turn a blind eye. That is, after all, your talent

This is one of the first times we've seen Kilgharrah openly express emotion aside from telling Merlin about his destiny, its perhaps the first hint that he is more personally invested than he lets on. And its in an interactions with Gaius, and you can hear the disdain in his voice. This dragon has been a mouthpiece for destiny, for everything that's going to happen, he's a mouthpiece for the future and in this you realise that he and Gaius have a past, that there is more darkness in the past then we've previously understood. In this you realise that Gaius has failed to be the person he should've been, he's been a coward, and he has betrayed an entire people in his silence.

Gaius elects to turn a blind eye again by leaving, in some ways he's choosing Merlin but in leaving he's making it so he's not really making that choice, he's leaving whatever will happen in other hands. And Gwen says one of the most powerful lines in the show when he tells her that he has no choice.

"In life we always have a choice sometimes its easier to think that you don't."

Cause we do, Gwen's right. It's dangerous and easy to think that you don't have any choice but one, and everyone in this show makes that mistake at some point. Uther probably thinks that he has no choice but to persecute magic users because they're are evil. Everyone seeking revenge on Uther thinks they have no choice but to do so, and in doing no choice but to let collateral damage happen. Because if you accept that there is a choice then you accept responsibility for your actions, you accept that you are responsible for any damage you cause. You may still make the choice, but you are accepting that it is a choice you choose and the results are one's you have chosen to be acceptable. But I also love Gwen's response when Gaius tells her that he is choosing to leave, its a non-choice and also in Gwen's view its the wrong choice, but she doesn't judge him at all for it. She just says "then I'll miss you." She doesn't expect him to be brave, and she continues to care about him even as he doesn't do the right thing.

There is another note here that will be of more relevance later on. Gaius is and has been a coward, but Merlin is his redemption. Merlin is the redemption for everything Gaius has done (or hasn't done) that has helped facilitate Uther's regime. Obviously in sheltering Merlin, Gaius is already rebelling in a more meaningful way then he has in years but later in the show he will make choices to support Merlin and his destiny that will redeem him, and like so much of the show it is for the love of Merlin that he makes them, emphasising the importance of love once again.

Edwin

In many ways this is an uncomfortable episode for someone who is both not a kid and has already watched the whole show. Out of every villain in the show, Edwin is in some ways set up as the least villainous. He takes no collateral damage, he risks Morgana's life yes but ultimately he gets Gaius fired and tries to kill Uther. He doesn't even try to kill Gaius until the end, his revenge is so proportional, so seemingly justified, he hates Gaius but he doesn't try to kill him. Ultimately the show (in this episode at least) doesn't really address that complexity, they have some last minute making Edwin more evil ( he tells Merlin that they could be all-powerful together, the trying to kill Gaius and Merlin (though that was an under danger from them situation), and his parents having practiced dark magic). This ultimately succeeds, and we can go away happy in the knowledge that good triumphed over evil. This works this early in the show, this early on and we are not really sure how to feel about magic, how to feel about the great purge, how to feel about Uther, so we can accept the shows presentations of Merlin protecting Uther with little questions.

Ultimately I'm not opposed to Merlin protecting Uther, but that's largely due to how the show questions it later, because the show does address it. It does address whether or not Uther should be protected when honestly most of those seeking revenge are at least justified in the killing Uther part of their revenge.

But this has not been addressed yet, so we're left with a villain who ultimately did not seem that evil being killed and then Uther being saved.

This is also paired with this episode being perhaps the first one to truly address the horror of the great purge. Edwin's backstory is chilling, the scars on his face are there because he tried to run into the fire to save his parents when they were being burnt at the stake by Uther. There's also this sense of a barely spoken history between all the older characters, Geoffrey and Gaius don't want to remember that time, Kilgharrah reminds Gaius of how he turns a blind eye, and even in Uther and Gaius right at the end.

Uther: Do you remember them, his parents?

Gaius: I remember them all, sire

This happens, even after everything that has happened in the episode, so the episode itself doesn't even entirely erase the confusion regarding Edwin, and we don't really know who was really right. It's also an interesting moment for Uther, a moment where we see his resolve about magic slightly shift, and there is a hint of unacknowledged guilt there.

The fact that immediately after this Uther apologises to Gaius really cements this, Uther rarely admits he's wrong and he only does so when his own sense of his rightness has been questioned. He doesn't admit he was wrong with magic (and he never will), but that feeling perhaps prompts him to be able to admit he was wrong to Gaius.

Why Gaius serves Uther

Now this is a question that's hard to answer, because ultimately Gaius does serve Uther loyally for much of the show, rarely opposing him and it goes somewhat beyond just not being able to do anything else because Uther's the king, and Gaius both can't do anything but also just isn't a very brave person (though that is certainly part of it). We do find out later that Gaius ultimately doesn't think Uther's a bad king, he believes that Uther on the whole is fair to most of his people (except magic users), he's not great but he's better than a lot would be. And you see the hint of that in:

Gaius: You have always done what you believed to be right

Gaius perhaps sees in Uther a king who isn't purely driven by selfishness, a king who does genuinely seek to act in the interests of the people, and I guess that's probably better than most kings.

I also think there's a warning in that, a warning about doing purely what you believe to be right. And by that I mean acting purely in accordance with your own feelings without reference to the possibility of being wrong. Doing what you feel to be right is not always the right choice, and its something Merlin does often consider, not only because consequences are often far beyond what one person can consider, but because you may be wrong. Every person is blinded by their own experiences, Uther's blinded by his anger and hate and he mistakes that for righteousness.

Also, ultimately I might note, Gaius is physician. Most of the time serving Uther does not ask too much of him, he saves lives, he helps people, he doesn't usually have to participate in the bad. However, that doesn't take away from the fact that he still does occasionally, and he is reasonably loyal.

I enjoyed this episode, but its never been one of my favourites and it's hard to go away from this one entirely satisfied that all right ends have been achieved. The show chooses not to fully address the moral complexity at the heart of it yet, and that's fine this is after all a children's show and we are still so early in it but that does mean that in setting up complexity and not going through with it there is a level of dissatisfaction, as we struggle really to know if right really won here.