#im gonna stop talking to everyone and ill only talk to you now i promise | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rafeandonlyrafe · 2 months

Text

sore and satisfied

words: 1k

warnings: 18+ only!!, smut, p in v sex, unprotected sex (reader is on birth control), dubcon!!, mentions of baby trapping, kinda pregnancy kink? its more of a control thing, dom!rafe, kinda fluffy at the end??, manipulation, bruises

“no.” you whine, feeling rafes rough hands cup your cheeks as he raises your face up to meet his. “im still sore from last time.”

“but you felt so good, right?” rafe questions, his lips ghosting over yours, his breath hot against you, making your mouth drop open, expecting the fierce kiss.

“yes…” it did feel good, even through the rough pounding and spankings and rafe gripping you so tightly you still have bruises.

“and ill be much gentler this time, baby.” rafe finally gives you a kiss, and it's like he's trying to convince you of his ability to stay gentle as his lips glide over yours.

“promise?” you whimper, hands gripping onto rafes shirt as you already start to go weak in the knees.

“of course baby.” rafe grins down at you, and you should have known what that grin meant, but you let him take you upstairs anyways.

his hands are gentle at first, undressing you carefully and praising you, celebrating every inch of your body that gets revealed.

“such a pretty pussy.” rafe says, cocking his head to the side as he looks between your thighs. “already looks ready for me to fuck.”

“need a little-” you're about to ask for something, for rafe to use his mouth again or rub you with his fingers, anything to open you up more, when rafe stands suddenly.

hes stripped naked before you can even blink, cock hard and jutting from his muscled body.

“i thought you said-”

“i haven't been rough yet, have i?” rafe will fight you to get inside your cunt if he has to, but he prefers you be pliable enough for him until he begins fucking you.

“n-no.” you admit, spreading your legs a little wider. sure, you'd prefer to be a little wetter, but if rafe is taking things slowly and gently you should have enough time to open up.

“exactly.” rafe says, letting out an exasperated sigh. “im gonna fuck you now and i don't want to hear you complaining.”

that's when you know you're really in trouble. rafes nice streak is done as he lays himself over your body, not bothering to hold himself up and dropping his full weight onto you.

“rafe!” you squeal out as his cock pushes against your entrance, hesitating for just a beat before he's pushing into you.

to rafes credit, he holds back somewhat. waits just a moment before he begins his punishing strokes, so hard and fast your head is instantly spinning.

rafes hands grip the same bruises on your hips, deepening them again, turning them into darker spots for everyone to see next time you don a swimsuit.

“mine.” rafe growls out, pressing a harsh kiss to your lips that's all teeth and tongue.

you let out a cry when he bites your bottom lip and gives it a tug, but the rush goes straight to your traitorous pussy.

you can feel your wetness growing as he fucks you, your walls becoming slicker and easier to move against.

“that's it.” rafe praises you. “can feel how much you like this.”

you want rafe to stop teasing you, it's bad enough he's abusing your pussy, he doesn't need to add to it with his words too, but even as your hands come up to cover face, he continues.

“my little slut. bet you can cum from just my cock. won't even have to touch your dirty clit to have you gushing around me.”

you know he's right. you can feel your orgasm building despite wanting to beg rafe to slow down, feeling the near painful stretch inside of you and the soreness growing exponentially as he fucks your already hurt pussy.

“soon you're gonna always be ready for me. ill rip your panties off and you'll already be soaked. and the best part is-” rafe is grunting as he talks, his fantasy expanding as his cock pummels you. “you won't even mean to. it'll be your bodies response to my body. trying to protect itself, make it easier, cause less pain.”

“and it will be better for both of us then. you just need to adjust to this, baby.” rafes voice moves to an almost sweet tone, so close to comforting if it wasn't for the fact that he's taking you raw as he talks. “then ill be able to fuck you so easily. and as often as i want without having to worry about your little pussy hurting.”

“okay.” you whisper. you're not sure if you can form any more words, but it's satisfactory enough for rafe as he presses a kiss to your lips.

“gonna cum inside you real soon. gonna fill you up. think you can get pregnant for me baby? swell that little tummy up?”

“rafe.” you pout, a few tears slipping down your cheeks. “stop teasing.”

“aw come on, we both know you're on birth control.” rafe rolls his eyes, but it doesn't stop him from imagining claiming you, showing the world proof of your fucking, proof that you're his and only his.

“but one day ill get you off of it. if i can't convince you maybe ill just have to switch your pills out for placebos. you won't even know until your tummy starts to swell.”

“rafe!” your tone is harsh, and it doesn't go unpunished as rafes thrusts reach even deeper, so far inside of you that you're squirming to get away only for rafe to hold you down into the bed, the mattress squishing under your combined weight.

“gonna cum right into your cervix since you're being a brat.” you can feel when rafe presses against it, your eyes widening as your high suddenly breaks, wetness gushing around rafes cock just like he knew would happen.

your pussy clamps down on rafes cock, keeping him sucked in as he starts to cum, long spurts releasing into your cunt as rafes moans and curses fill the room, echoed with your quieter whines and gasps.

“how's your pussy feel now baby?” rafe asks.

“sore.” you pout, which rafe quickly kisses off your face as he pulls out.

“fine, won't fuck you anymore then since you always complain about it hurting.” rafe shrugs, feigning like he's getting out of bed when you grab his hand and pull him back to your side.

“no!” you say quickly before taking a breath and settling in next to rafe. “no, i never said that.”

“exactly.” rafe puts his arms around you, tugging you into his chest, keeping you close to him, right where he wants you always.

2K notes · View notes

a66-1 · 5 months

Text

starving.

Simon x Fem!Insecure!Reader.

Part 1 | ???

TW: Talk of ed's, negative self talk, low self esteem, bad mouthing (from reader to herself, comes with the territory) cursing, self harm. i tried not to be too descriptive with the reader, so EVERY insecure girlie who reads this feels seen. (these tw are for the whole thing, im pretty sure this is gonna be a series)

a/n: hey. if you need help, dm me. ill talk to you if you need it :). (also i made my banners. if you want one dm me! i make them for free, just with credit :)) NOT PROOF READ

i hope your doing okay honey.

Stepping out of the shower, the towel around you just big enough to touch ends is slipped around yourself. Showering is getting harder. You can barely stand glancing at the mirror now.

You dry yourself off, and hand the towel back up. You can do it, just walk past the mirror to grab your clothes.

You take the steps past the mirror, and turn your back to the mirror to change. Slipping your bra on, and it squishes the skin on your back and you grimace.

Once your dressed, you turn back around. The nagging voices are just waiting to pounce. I mean, what? You used to be so skinny.

You used to be pretty.

You decided to let your hair air dry, and you walk into your bedroom. You had work today, but you really wish you didn't. It was a bad week, you'd skipped 3 meals in the last few days and you know what your therapist would say.

'The progress you've made, hun. You can't go back now.'

The bad days are getting too close to each other now. You used to have at least a week between them, but now it's barely 48 hours. Maybe being off medicine isn't working good anymore.

Maybe you're no good.

You throw in a big hoodie, one that covers you, and some sweat pants, glancing at the big mirror in your room.

You can't stop analyzing yourself.

There's not one good thing on you is it?

Fuck.

The rest of the day was spent at your stupid 9-5, with your stupid boss, in your stupid, lonely life. Christ, being off anti-depressants is really hitting you hard. Everyone at your job is stupid and today every customer who wants to blow you ear off about how you kids these days, by the end of the day, your so tense that your shoulders are aching.

You got about 30 minutes left at this off-brand kroger store, when a big, big ass man walks in, shoving a mask with a skull print on it on. You curse to yourself, you really don't want to have to call the police for a robbery, you just want to go home.

To be honest, if he had a gun, you'd be half tempted to let him shoot you-

"Ma'am?" A heavy British accent came from your right. You turn your head, and scan his few items. You don't bother with the how are you's and you sigh.

"It'll be 16.84." You drag your eyes to his, and he reaches to his pocket, pulling out..

A wallet. What else were you thinking?

He hands you a twenty, and you hand him his respective change. He bags his own items, because honestly, you seem like the only worker in the store. Your face is written with exhaustion, whether it be from this job or something else, and the guy notices.

"Have uh... A good day." He nods to you, and walks off.

You purse your lips, and sigh, closing your cashier, because fuck finishing today. You're too close to a breakdown, and you're not trying to let anyone see.

You drive home, your hands tight around the wheel. You know it's a bad idea to be driving this emotional, to the point you wonder what would happen if you swerve your car into a tree.

You won't do it though.

You need to get back out there. It's why you stopped taking your meds.

You promise yourself that tomorrow you'll go out, and at least get a one night stand, you want need, anything.

Once home and in bed, you scroll and scroll and scroll. Doom scrolling is too common on these longer nights. You have a pillow tucked into your arm, and your hand squeezes it every time that pang in your lower chest rings out. Loneliness, you think.

You always scroll through your old friends instagrams or snapchats, seeing their nice bodies and nice boyfriends. You've been so nice and kind and karma should be on your side, but it always failed.

Especially after your last boyfriend.

Your friends say to wait.

To wait.

But waiting is getting harder. Days are getting longer, and your head seems to spin more when left to its own devices. Why do you have to wait?

Your looks.

Your personality.

Who'd wanna be seen with you?

You flip your phone over, and shove your face in the pillow, your breathing staggered.

You fell asleep late, that night. The tears brought you to exhaustion.

woah why did this take 2 tries to write.

be waiting for pt.2

TRUST FINALS ARE SOOM COMING TO AN END and summer i will be STEWING TRUST!!!

Taglist!

@i-am-hungry-24-7

thank you for all the support. drunk simon blew up and im crying bc i came back after a 2 year hiatus and i wasn't getting the same feedback as usual so to finally seeing people enjoy my work again makes me feel great. <3

sorry simon wasn't in this part much. you gotta know the reader first tho, right?

bye babes..

-a661

#simon ghost x reader #simon riley x reader #simon riley x you #simon ghost riley x reader #simon ghost x you #simon fluff #simon ghost riley #simon riley #ghost call of duty #ghost cod #ghost x reader #ghost x you #simon ghost riley x you #ghost #simon riley call of duty #simon ghost fluff #mw2 ghost #call of duty x reader

293 notes · View notes

shradsmanifestt · 1 month

Note

hi, im sorry for bothering u right now. ive been asking around for advice everywhere because i really need all the help i could use right now. my anxiety is flaring up like crazy because my results come out tomorrow and im so scared because if i mess this up then my future is ruined. my mental health has been horrible and that has severely affected my grades but in most asian countries they dgaf about that and basically think it's nonexistant for minors so ofc i'm still undiagnosed, and if i were to apply to a uni i wouldnt get any good chances anywhere. if i could just get 3 Bs in my AS levels it would be okay or else i'd have to retake it and it's super costly here.. i don't wanna put my family through that because they'll talk me down, degrade me, destroy my self esteem which i've managed to build back a little. they were like this since when i was the topper and thats what made me burnout. undiagnosed adhd, trauma, depression also contributed to it

im applying the law, but instead of the feeling of success that everyone else gets i feel panicked. the 'feeling' people usually get when they're in the wish fulfilled state, the feeling of accepting it and it being real—im not getting that. i dont see a clear picture when i visualize. every time i try to, i end up breaking down and feeling like a failure... but I'm still trying to go on because why is it that the people who hurt me and practically ruined my life get to live successfully, while i suffer? thats not fair... i promised myself that if i could just get 3 Bs, ill turn my life around and work really hard... but is it over for me? i want to win, im trying to, but im scared

im trying my best to visualize myself getting 3 Bs, reenacting my friends faces when i get the results, praying to God and thanking Him for blessing me and continuing to bless me, but there is this fear still lingering at the back of my mind... i feel like I'm not doing it right. i have like one day left and I'm so nervous. im going over posts, tweets, and every time I feel a little better, it all comes crashing down because of doubts. theres only one thing one my mind right now: 'how am I gonna turn it around in one day?' i know that the 3D does not matter and that everything is done in imagination, but here i feel like its not done in imagination either

right now nothings clicking in my head, whatever i read is getting scrambled in my mind, i feel so lost and empty. could u please tell me what to do in this specific situation? u can be as harsh as you want if that's what's needed to get the point across. im really sorry for the bother and id be really grateful if u could please help out, ive never been this desperate before... my life cant be over before it even started

Hey love,

I get you, I really do but trust me when I say this.

THIS SHIT IS REAL AF. Manifestation is real af. It's as real as the fact that you are a human being. All you have to do is trust yourself that it is already done. If good results is what you want then that is exactly what you'll get. You need to choose to stop having doubts because it is already done. That is the simplest answer I can give you. Persist on what you want.

I am glad to tell you this but I just got test results for a major exam held in my uni today and I got into the 95th percentile just by saying to myself that my super power is aptitude tests and that I already scored great. In my friends group only 3 of us were eligible and I have 70+ more marks then them as well. If I can do it, you can do it. You need to stop doubting yourself. Atleast stop doubting manifestation. Cause at this point you're only gonna manifest your doubts.

I'll give you a scenario - If you're worried about getting bad grades, Trust me when I say this you're gonna manifest exactly that coz you will manifest exactly what you assume. You can choose to stop that right here, RN. Choose to accept that you got great marks. I mean don't even like aim for B's go for A's. I don't care even if you left the paper blank coz if you assume you're the topper, that is exactly what's gonna happen.

If you do get bad marks and I'm gonna be harsh here - You're the only reason why! You're gonna manifest exactly what you assume to be true even if it's good or bad. Your sc mind don't differentiate btw what's good for you or what's bad for you. It only knows what you feed it.

You got this, TRUST ME

Love, Shrads.

#law of assumption #loassumption #loa #affirm and persist #loa tumblr #neville goddard #consciousness #loa blog #loatwt #imagination #affirm and saturate #saturate your mind #shradsmanifestt

41 notes · View notes

belovedstarrs · 8 months

Text

do you even care?! part two

• pairing : geto x fem!reader

• tags : mentions of drinking, talks about verbal fighting, (i dont know anymore.)

• a/n : i wanted to finish this tonight (tech. morning) but i got caught up playing valo w a new friend i made. 7am slump hitting hard and i just wanna post this and sleep.

• w/c : 783

you found yourself at utahimes place for the night. you were in her spare bedroom but still couldnt sleep no matter how comfortable you were, you couldnt get that fight off your mind. could you have been more mature about it?

the next morning

you felt like you barely got any sleep. you needed to go back to your house and pick up a fresh uniform from your closet. the only problem was could you face geto? of course not, you didnt wanna be the first to say anything. you decided to still go anyways cause you cant go to jujutsu high wearing some sweats and a t-shirt.

you found yourself walking to you and getos shared apartment and youre pulling out the keys from your pocket. you were absolutely praying geto wasnt in there. when you opened the door you found getos keys & shoes to be gone. you quietly whispered to yourself "yes!" as you close the front door and walk to your shared bedroom.

you quickly showered and grabbed your uniform as you left the house. you were gonna be a little late but youre sure the second-years wouldnt mind you being a couple minutes late, right?

you quickly ran into your class as you apologized for being late. you looked at your schedule and sighed out of relief as you saw it was gonna be a easy day. maki and panda had a mission together, inumaki had a mission, and okkotsu was overseas so he wasnt here. you let everyone leave as you relaxed a little. still thinking about what happened last night.

you left your classroom to go to the teachers lounge to grab a cup of coffee. you seriously need that right now, but as you walked out your classroom you saw him, geto. you had to build up the courage real quick to walk past him. you two shared glances as you bumped shoulders in the hall and once you passed him you felt embarrassment wash over you.

once you grabbed your coffee you sat at the couch in the teachers lounge on your phone scrolling on instagram. god, you felt jealous of all these girls finding happy relationships.

after work

you found yourself walking up to your shared apartment again. youre planning to grab some of your things so you can stay at utahimes place. when you opened the door you found geto sitting at the table and he looked like he was in distress. his face lit up when he saw you.

"y/n, i was hoping you would stop by. may we talk some things over at a nice dinner tonight?" you looked at him confused. where was he getting all this? "pardon?" you said. geto responded with "i dont need to repeat myself, but ill say it anyways. we are going out to dinner tonight to talk things over. i would dress nicely."

you felt confused, but you obliged. you went to your shared bathroom and got yourself ready. you put on a dark green tight dress and dark green heels to match. geto was wearing a dress shirt and a tie with some nicer pants. "why are we dressing so nicely?" you asked. all geto responded with was "cant we dress nice for a nicer restaurant?" you sighed at his answer.

you two arrived at the restaurant and you ordered some red wine. once the waiter left you spoke up first. geto seemed nervous. "so, what do you have to say for yourself. i believe im owed a explanation." geto sighed as he stood up and reached for his pocket then pulled out a ring box.

y/n l/n, will you marry me? "i promise ill explain after." you looked at him with shock, tears threatening to flow from your eyes. did geto truly love you? have you just been overthinking everything? "yes, yes suguru ill marry you!" you crash into his lips passionately and after he puts the ring on your finger. it fits perfectly. how did he ever get your ring size?

"y/n im sorry for anything ive made you feel over the last couple of months.." ive been planning this exact day out for about 3 months and right before it happens you blew up on me. its true, i had been drinking but it mostly was from the stress of planning. i just got overwhelmed was all. it was true though what we both said yesterday. my phone died and i got a new mission, but i finished up and started drinking. im sorry, i shouldve just gone home." tears burst out from your eyes your relived geto does care for you and your relationship.

made by @belovedstarrs do not copy or use in any way without permission

(thanks kal for the idea to make him propose i was very stuck on what to do)

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk anime #jjk geto #geto suguru #getou suguru x y/n #getou suguru x you #suguru geto #jujutsu geto #geto x y/n #geto x you #getou suguru x reader #geto x reader #geto smut #fanfic #writing

29 notes · View notes

mrsdeliberatecreater · 1 month

Note

Okay love. I need you to do something for me. Take 3 deeeeep breaths.

Okay?

I understand you completely. I understand what are going through completely. I'm Indian, so I know how it can be. I got yelled at by my sister for thinking that I might have ADHD. 👀 Its all good now though. I also used to deal with debilitating anxiety two years ago.. I barely left my room, let alone go to school for a master's degree that I chose and got into serious debt for.. I'm not making this about me, but I just want you know that change is possible.

Anytime you start to feel bad, a anxiety attack coming on, I want you to just keep taking calming deep breaths and focus on the now. Focus on the things you see, things you can hear, smell, etc. Its the feeling of "now". Come back to the "now" as many times as needed if you feel negative thoughts. I would affirm, "Everything is okay, everything will be okay", pick an affirmation that feels natural to you, and affirm.

If you like subliminals, I would recommend: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zX6BKBzVgfk&t=4s This has stopped so many of my anxiety attacks before I learned to let them go..

If not keep doing the breathing exercises. You will find that by repetition this will eventually release the reasons for feeling anxiety in the first place. Take things one day at a time. If it gets bad, ask someone you trust for help.

We alll have doubts. Doubts are fine. As long as you are just focused on the end/wish fulfilled/affirming, you are fine, even with doubts. You don't need to believe with 100% everything till you burst a blood vessel. If you feel like your doubts are overwhelming you, decide that nothing, not even you can stop your desires from manifesting. <3

"Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you". - Matthew 17:20

If you have the time, I would highly recommend IlluminatingJoy on youtube, especially her https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CT2xyCcoues&t=1727s

She has a really good grasp on manifestation and explains everything so well and accommodates it to fit our "logic", while completely validating human emotions. The exercise she does in this video is so so simple but seriously effective. I catch myself slipping at least once a day that would have spiraled if I hadn't done the exercise.

Also if you want to do this in a day, I want you to focus on your mental diet. Affirm affirm affirm.

If negative thoughts come up, you breathe and think "I can relax, I got all A's". Anything in the 3D reminds you think, "I can relax, I got what I wanted. Your family being mean to you? remember how in class after lunch, your teacher is talking but you're thinking about something else.

Also speaking of that, I know you said you can't your images clearly. That's fine. Visualizing is NOT imagination.

Visualizing is NOT imagination.

My visualizations are never clear and I manifest everything I imagine all the time. They all have that "vignette" effect lol..

Imagination can be a picture, it can be a smell, a touch, a voice, just how someone's clothes smell when they are standing really close to you like in an elevator. Like you can specifically smell it but you KNOW what I'm talking about right?

Your loved ones in your face? Use it YOUR ADVANTAGE. I used to hear my sister compliment me, it was easy to hear her voice. I primarily used her voice to fix our relationship. Cannot for the life of me picture her face properly but thats FINE.

You can use ANY of the senses, just one or two or all. Hear your family saying things you want in your mind. Hear them congratulating you, compliment you.

You can slowly work this into all the other aspects of your life...

By the way, you aren't lost and empty. You are a very caring person, you want to do things so that you don't let your family down, in spite of how they treat you. That to me is a genuinely caring person.

But you need to apply that same care to yourself. You don't need me to be harsh to you, YOU don't need to be harsh to you. You are working so hard to find answers but you ARE the answer. Its okay. Please just rest. Its all yours. Be more soft to yourself, be more kind to yourself, compliment yourself, you will start to see that kindness reflected in the 3D as well.

I have given you a lot of options here so you can pick and choose what makes YOU feel better so that YOU can focus on SELF because

Nothing to change but self

Reach out to me as many times as you would like, you could never bother me.

Nya 🌺

#law of assumption #neville goddard #manifestation #loa #manifesting #loassblog #subliminal #loassumption #robotic affirming #affirm and persist #affirmations

10 notes · View notes

caseythebunnyboy · 2 months

Text

where you can find me! (+ a message for someone with "e" in his name)

hello again everyone :} sorry for another long absence, but i do have my reasons for it, i promise ówò first things first though, ive made the decision to simply leave this account be and just keep it up as an archival of my little horny thoughts!

im not just gonna blow everyone off and leave with no way for my friends and mutuals to contact me, though! you can talk to me on discord caseythebunny, and message me on my other tumblr account caseyisthinking! im pretty busy with school, but ill try my best to reply when im in the proper mental state to! you may also message for either sfw or nsfw reasons :}

the reason ive decided to stop posting is because it requires a bit too much effort for me to enjoy, and it drains my energy really quickly to be running a blog this personal and sexual :{ there was also a recent situation with a dom i loved that really tore me up and i genuinely couldnt get horny for a few months because of how sad i was...

things are getting better now, though. so while i will be technically "leaving" this account, its moreso just a "see you around" since you can always message me in other places if you wish to! ill always leave a path open for you guys, even if im not in the headspace to reply consistently or do sexy talk.

everyone was so nice to me, people treated me with so much kindness that ill never forget about even if im stepping back from this blog. im so glad i took the chance to make this account and run this place, even if only for a little while. it meant so much to me. i love you all, see you when i see you!

and if my previous dom who has an "e" as the first letter in his name is reading this, please feel free to message me again if youre comfortable with doing so. i didnt log in to this account for awhile, and you had deactivated by the time i got back and saw your message. i wanna talk to you again, i could never hate you. my messages are open to you as well if you wish to start over, or if you ever want to just talk. i hope i can see you again, without seeing youve cut contact/deactivated before i could reply. i want to have proper back-and-forth conversations with you, please dont run away like before. i really did like you :{

#casey ★ speaking

6 notes · View notes

ghostsprettymama · 2 years

Text

moonlight

Plot: Voldemort's children Attending Hogwarts? What is dumbledore thinking? Perhaps he's trying to get them to go against their father?

Warnings: Angst,violence,mentions of sui,child endangerment,harrypotter, M x F reader. all stufent characters mentioned in this part are minors so no smut. only fluff.

Pairing: Harry potter x Voldemorts daughter ! reader

WORD COUNT: 3,565 words 19,378 characters

STUDENT CHARACTERS IN THIS PART ONCE AGAIN ARE MINORS. DO NOT SEXUALIZE, POTRAY SEXUAL OR DISPLAY ANYTHING SEXUAL TORWARDS THEM .

-------

“Y/n?” your cousin draco woke you up. You slept in the malfoy manor due to your parents orders, well Bellatrix convincing your father Voldemort for you to stay Somewhere safe..

you got up, it was still nighttime.” You think Hogwarts will like you?” the little boy asked. you thought realistically, you were a pessimistic little girl.” no. They fear my parents and I look alike them. Seeing me would send them to their ancestors..” you said getting up.

“What about the potter, we can make him our friend!” said Draco, oh He's so optimistic, you loved it. You hugged your cousin. “I admire your optimism Draco, but I am potter repellent.” you sighed.

The tales of harry did seem cool to you. You just didn't like how these common folk stretched it.

“What's your father like?” Your cousin asked. You two went into the living room sitting by the fire, he wanted the story again.

you smiled, you two were both 11 yet you acted like his older sister. “My father is the strongest dark wizard there is, my mother following behind! No wizard or witch dares to utter his name or...” you used a cloaking spell re- appearing behind him. “HE KILLS THEM!” you said, a magical hallucination of your father behind you.

Little Draco screamed as you ended your spell hugging him. “It’s fine draco. No matter who or what it is ill protect you” you promised him.

Narcissa Malfoy came in, crossing her arms “Children we must leave for Hogwarts soon. Why are you not packing?” she smiled.

“Sorry, mama Y/n was just telling me stories,” Draco said going back to your shared room.

Just as you head out, Lucius stopped you. “You do remember your plan for this year correct.” He asked you, you weren't scared of the Malfoys.

If anything they feared your father, and if you failed. That equals your father's rage. “Befriend potter,” you said. “Good” he released his grip on you as you went to the room packing.

HOGWARTS EXPRESS

You walked with pride Besides the Malfoys, everyone knew who you were. You looked at potter with a smile, he smiled back. he looks kind, i hope to enjoy befriending him. molly held him pulling him back and whispering in his ear " do not mind that cursed girl, she is not to befriend" she protected harry

HARRY POV

When I locked eyes with that girl, something in me clicked instantly,I moved when molly whispered in my ear since the sensation was irritating, and I looked at molly shaking my head.

"no.. she's not cursed.." I said furrowing my brows, I defended the girl as if I knew her for life. when I saw mollys reaction being shocked I shook my head and turned back around and she was gone.

HOGWARTS EXPRESS

HARRY POV STILL

I saw the girl again with a blonde boy and the girl I had saw earlier performed a trick which made the blonde boy smile, then they looked over talking and pointing, I was so confused. I looked at my new friend Hermione asking her a question "Hermione who is she?" she turned her head immediately raising an eyebrow.

her eyes widened like her eyes were about to pop out. "That's Y/n Lestrange riddle.. shes like the opposite of what you're stereotyped to be.. but I personally don't believe in such buffoonery. im, not gonna assume shes bad off of tales and neither should you" she lectured.

"oh now she coming over-" I said

"Y/n Riddle, my full name is Y/n Lestrange riddle. what's yours" Her sweet eyes smiled but not her mouth, how odd. "Harry potter," I Said shaking her hand, she didn't patronize me or treat me horribly.

"I wanna be your friend can I?" She asked me. "yes! of course," I said happily. "can my cousin draco come? or you guys can move to our cart it can fit lot of people" She said optimistically.

We moved to her cart, we had lots of conversations and eventually, ron warmed up to her.

HOGWARTS

y/n pov

Harry walked in with my hand in his, draco holding my other, they did this since i almost fell off the boat.

"I could've sworn I saw something!" I protested and they sighed in sync. Draco looked at me with a concerned look.

"You act like a suicidal pigeon!" he smacked me on my head and i rubbed in pain.

we sat at tables getting called one by one,Dumbeldore and snape looked at me, i know who snape is because he works with my dad.

i wave and he nodded, i was gonna sit by harry but the tall ginger twins sat where i was going to.

"sorry the seats taken" the one on the right said "kick rocks" the other said.

I felt rage consume me and im sure they could tell by my eyes, i just wanted to be by my friend. i shook my head sitting across from the trio, draco taking the space between me.

"Fred dont be rude!" ron hit his arm, and got scowled by fred. "yeah dont be rude to the evil princess!" George said, i was upset.

"Im not a princess .im the same as you. a normal person. royalty isnt as it seems but it seems itd feed both of your egos." i said , sitting across from harry with draco. turning to the man who stood up. he looks like a grandpa.

He gave a speech but i felt eyes on me. i squeezed dracos hand and he squeezed back three times. calm down its alright. thats what the squeezes meant.

"We have a two students here . yes theyre Harry potter and Miss Y/n Lestrange Riddle. treat them as your companion and not enemeys against eachother. At hogwarts we all are all equal" Dumbeldore looked at Fred " and we will not discriminate because of parents or what they did. children are not their parents, you all are here to become amazing witches and wizards, act like it."he sat back down.

Soon each teacher introduced themselves giving speeches but i spaced out,my owl rested in my lap, i loved her dearly. if anything happened to her id wreck havoc. Soon everyone but me Got sorted.

Then it was my time. i walked up as eyes were on me. i did what my mama said and held my head high, i stepped with delicate grace.

"i heard her mother put her through intense training"

"her father treats her like a war machine... they dont even celebrate her birthday"

"they taught her everything but to be a child."

I payed no mind to whispers that didnt know a thing. Lucius taught me not to associate with fools who speak out their rear ends. I sat down in the chair, when the hat was placed on me it seemed to have a crisis.

"You are tricky...a child filled with so much passion,charisma, Knowledge and promise. so friendly yet turned away by all but her kin and a promising boy." the hat asked me a question.

everyone fell silent when i said my answer. "What do you see in your future" it said. "Rebelling against evil and protectong my friends from those who hurt them. no matter who." i said.

I saw dumbeldores smile in the corner of my eye.

"GRYFFINDOR!" shouted the hat, Draco looked upset, harry,hermione and ron clapped along with the twins who suprisingly clapped.

you sat by them , draco glared at you as if you werent related to him anymore.. that hurted.

we headed to dorms, you tried to speak to draco but he turned his head away from you, you shrugged. " i dont get it." you said " get what?" Hermione tilted her head. "Draco.." you frowned.

"Maybe hes temporaily upset. " hermione held your hand with a smile "its okay to let them be mad. focus on being with your friends the rest of your hogwarts life!" she said hugging your arm.

LATER

i sat in the common room with fred,Ron,George and harry. they were playing games while i looked out the window, i already completed my first task what else.. i bit my lip.

"whats wrong now?" harry said sitting beside me,i shook my head. "youre at hogwarts! have fun with us" harry said pulling you to wizards chest.

"Fair warning im not easy to beat," Ron said. you smiled, he underestimated you, you had played against many people while your dad worked including your siblings. speaking of them, they walked in sitting behind you.

"You have siblings?" Fred asked " two sets of twins in gryffindor hm" George replied to his twin. you and Ron battled with chess, he almost had beaten you if you didnt move right, but you wanted him to win, you purposely lost.

"Hey no fair you lost on purpose" Ron said,you felt your sibblings hands on the your shoulder. "do it again." Miles said in your ear,Max was at the other ear.

"Do what Riddles do and beat those who challenge them."Max said and you listened,you werent under imperius, you jusf feared them.

You moved with skill and non perdictable actions. the game ended in a matter of sections, they smiled "Thats our sister." max and miles said hugging you then heading to their rooms.

You calmed down looking at the four,all of them showed concern. "what was that" said fred. " nothing" you got up going to your room.

Harry pov

"Shes an odd fellow" Ron said laying on the couch, he ate chocolate frogs."Shes not strange.. when i saw her at the train i saw something different then what you see.." I hugged my legs to help me think.

"Ooh what are you fated lovers!" George joke making ron choke on his chocolate frogs. "Dont be ridiculous were too young for that stuff and i doubt she ever would feel like that" i rolled my eyes heading up to sleep.to my room

WEEKS LATER.

I had the weirdest dream, about a stone. maybe i can ask Hermione about it. we were in spell castings class, Y/n and draco were across from me.

She was having trouble with casting spells, when she looked at me , i froze. i shook my head showing her the correct motion.

She did it suceeding, when she showed draco i saw his smile, when he looked at me though. it was a scowl.

When class ended i pulled my friends aside going to the library,ron huffed only having food on his mind right now.

"I could be eating some amazing food right now harry" said ron, i rolled my eyes. "a dream i had about a stone.. it was crimson red.. and shined and i think i need to find it.." i said .

Y/N pov

" harry are you speaking of the sorcerers stone?" you asked him, ron sat on a desk near me while hermione searched a book. " i cant find it." hermione said flopping down.

blue = y/n

pink = hermione

red= ron

white= harry

"we have to tell someone"

"who can we not trust"

" maybe our friends? like the teachers or... i have no actually what about you ron"

"i dont know ask y/n"

you knew who you couldnt trust, you cant trust them or throw your cousin under the bus, you choose someone you couldnt care less for. "snape."

"why him?"

"hes gonna embarass us and think im just trying to rebell agaimst my father! plus hes weird!"

"i think hes alright even though he looks like hes constantly suffocating "

"you mean his double chin ron??"

" a what?"

"oh my god"

"i know who we can tell"

"who"

"Professor Mcgongall!" you said. you immediately ran to her class, when we arrived everyone said stuff at once.

-----

"ALRIGHT ALRIGHT CHILDREN one at a time.. y/n first" She said looking at you, directly in your blue eyes to sense a lie.

"Harry had a dream about the sorcerers stone...and that my dad was gonna take it .." you said, looking at her in the eyes. you had her convinced almost.

"I don't know how you found out about the Stone, but rest assured, no one can possibly steal it, it's too well protected." she said sitting in her chair.

"its getting late off you go to sleep." she said dismissing the gryffindors "But- "off you go!" she said, she looked at your eyes which flashed with rage. nobody was listening to your friend.

"Fine. if you wont trust us then youll see what happens" you stormed off, Mcgonagal sighed shaking her head.

NO ONES POV

"Potter" she said as everyone but harry left.She took harrys hands in hers " On behalf of y/n. do not let go of that girl no matter what. she is a pure soul that is a key to the future.. i dont believe shes out of her fathers control, but please, never let go of what you have." she said

Harry nodded, not understanding but he nodded.He quickly followed behind his friends reaching for Y/ns hand. the two 11 year olds naturally had such a close bond their bodys automatically did this.

they waited in the gryffindor common room for every staff and student head to sleep. then came neville

"I cant let you do this! not with her, her parents-

"Lumos Maxima Muffliato " y/n said doing the motion hitting neville with it as he fell asleep.

hermione looked surpised high fiving y/n " im proud of you remembering what we studied!" she hugged the other female with a smile.

"cmon !" harry ran, to a mirror, ron knew what he was doing but the other two didnt.

They came to a door, Y/n pinched her nose “Eugh it smells like wet dog..” she said gagging “maybe because a dogs in there” Hermione said opening the door.

The Quartet entered seeing the massive, The lestrange child flinched seeing how huge the mutt was. “I dont think we should.. It could attack us..” Said y/n. “Its asleep.. “ ron said. Hermione spotted the self-playing instrument.

“The harp! Its playing and it makes the dog sleepy.. But how do we...” Hermione tried to find a way. “C'mon!” y/n pulled Hermione in the boys following.

“it has horrid breath” Harry said,y/n snorted at him. “Y/n,Ron help me move the Paw” Harry said moving to the dog. “Why me? Why not Hermione and Y/n??” Ron said “Just move the paw!” he said rolling his eyes.

you two did just that. When fully moving the paw, a trap door was revealed. “I’ll fall first- dont fall unless i give you a sign” said Harry. “ what if something bad happens,” Said Hermione. “Then you two have to leave,” Y/n said.

“Wait why just us” Ron looked at y/n confused.” because im going down. First TAH TAH!” the little girl jumped down without warning.

“Bloody hell- did she just-” Ron was in shock. “she's strong! She’ll be okay” Hermione replied. “Wait. Did it get quiet..” Harry said “the harp... It

Stopped playing” the now trio turned around as thick globs of drool leaked down to the floor. “JUMP.” he said as soon as he turned around jumping down.

The two followed having common sense in not wanting to die. The dogs attacked the door ripping it apart.

The four kids were now in slimy vines that slithered around” stop moving idiots! Its devil's snare, relax yourselves and stop moving! Itll only kill you faster” hermione said "kill us faster???? NOW I CAN DEFFINENTLY RELAX THANKS!" ron yelled while struggling. hermione listened to her own orders relaxing, the vines would snap and she sunk down.

"Hermione?! Y/n where are you!" ron said "Im with her! just relax trust me." Hermione said, harry listened while ron struggled, falling down, joining the duo. "HARRY" ron said in pure anguish.

"youre here!" hermione said to harry and he nodded looking at y/n. "is ron- not here?" hermione paced around trying to think of something "i know this spell from herbology..." hermione tried to remember" is it Lumos Solem?" Y/n asked in curiousity " umm.. My aunt narcissa taught me that.." Y/n added on.

"Yes! brilliant y/n thank you so much!" she hugged y/n "now say it with me!" hermione said aiming her wand at the snare.

"Lumos Solem!" the two aimed up at the devils snare , it released ron shriviling up. "good thing we didnt panic!" ron said"good thing those two saved you." Harry corrected. Y/n and hermione heard something "what is that?" hermione asked . "sounds like wings.." Harry said as he approached the sound, oppening the doors and his friends following behind.

"wow... i never saw bugs like these in books" Hermione said " neither have i..in any of the forbidden books my mother made me read either" y/n seemed amazed looking at them " thats because theyre keys..and i bet one of them fits that door" Ron said, the qauret walked, coming across a broom. "whats this all about.." hermione said. " i dont know.." the ginger boy replied. they went to the door as harry potter looked at the broom. "strange.."

"Alohomora!" Hermione said and the door didnt budge "worth a shot." ron said, hoping to brighten the mood.

"maybe one of those keys fit... but how would you get to it?" Y/n said

"the broom!"

LATERBCIMLAZYANDIDONTWANNARECITETHEWHOLEMOVIEFROMEMORY

"Harry dont tell me you came to look at yourself.." Y/n said jokingly,Harry looked at Y/n trying to see if she understood, she nodded, both of them looked in the mirror seeing different things.

Y/n saw the truth, havoc. her by her fathers side . fire was everywhere on hogwarts, then screaming and crying she was over rons body screaming. she pointed her wand at herself and harry did the same action. "Avada Kedav-" someone pulled her away from the mirror.

Her crimson eyes returning to their regular colour ,she looked at Professer Quirrel holding her hostage with fear as she still was shaken. "THE STONE BOY." a voice said.

Y/n Pov

"father?" y/n said trying to squirm put the flimsy teachers grip. "turn around. and let go of my child" he released you turning around taking his turban off.

a face in the back of his head.

Harry flinched"oh my god.." . Y/n backed up infront of harry automatically defending him.

"my girl, bring me the stone, dont you want me to be proud of you?" Your fathers disgusting mutilated face said in the back of his head. "no." y/n said "what?" "I SAID NO." " who taught you that word! you know better then to say it to me" your dad spat venom at you

"are you guys really- "SHUT UP POTTER" you both said in sync, god damn you were your fathers child, Y/n turned to him .

Quirrel got closer to Y/n and she tried to cast a spell on her father “P-petrifi- “ she attempted but the man smacked you out of the way.

“Give me the stone boy, and join me, you wont have to die” Voldemort father sounded promising. “NO.” he shouted at Voldemort.

“Dont make it harder on yourself! GIVE ME THE STONE BOY OR SUFFER A CRUEL DEATH.” he said as Quirrel chokes him out, Harry panicked not being able to breathe, his hands gripped Quirrels,burning him. The touch had burned quirrel he’d release the boy letting go.

“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?” He said dropping into his own pile shriveling away. Y/n couldn't believe it, Y/n got up shaking the pain off, She walked to harry hugging harry making sure he was okay.

Then everything went black.

HARRY POV

I woke up in a infirmary bed, i opened my eyes to see y/n resting beside me,Dumbeldore came in with the stone looking at me. "I dont get it..." i said looking at Y/n.

"Get what potter?"Dumbeldore said sitting by his side, opposite of y/n"I just met her.. not to long ago and she protected me from him.. her father, she failed and know she couldnt yet she did.. and when i look at her i feel like i should stay close and hold her hand like we never should be seperated...I feel like i know her more then anyone like were connected somehow.." he said his eyes moving to dumbeldore and he nodded.

"Can i say something you might not believe Harry?" dumbeldore said with a smile. "Of course sir.." Harry said. "The sun and the moon at first were strangers, yet with one look they felt as if they forever knew eachother. their souls were bound together destined as soulmates.. but many things came between their love. on many adventures the moon protected the sun blindly no matter who it was, she knew she couldnt live without the sun, because they were bounded together by a phenomenom. When by fate two are born, their souls are bounded since their life which is set in stone, depend on eachother." he said.

"but i dont get it.." Harry said "i dont love her?? i barely know what that is" he said confused "Soulmates arent always Romantic dear potter. now rest up. you have class first morning tomorrow!" he laughed walking out

"hes confusing..." Harry said his hand rested in Y/ns hair. "you are like the moon now that i think of it..but why protect me when you cant protect yourself.." Harry sighed.

"Us..? soulmates? is that some tale dumbeldore got from a book.."

" i wouldnt mind if we were ." y/n said suddenly causing harry to jump. "when were you- "ive been awake" y/n said opening her eyes. " soulmates can be platonic harry, dont fret i wouldnt be with you for .. yawn. a milllion years"

"yeah right."

The end.

30 notes · View notes

toothlespoggers · 9 months

Text

”Why are you sad” WHY ARE YOU HAPPY? HOW CAN YOU BE HAPPY WHEN THE ONLY WAY YOU CAN FEEL JOY IS BY HAVING ENOUGH MONEY TO GO DO STUFF THAT IS FUN IN THE MOMENT BUT ULTIMATELY STILL LEAVES YOU EMPTY INSIDE BECAUSE NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO THE WORLD IS BEING FUCKED OVER IN A MILLION DIFFERENT WAYS BY PEOPLE WHO DONT HAVE COMMON SENSE AND THERES NO HOPE IN TRYING TODO ANYTHING ABOUT IT BECAUSEIT JUST DOESNT WORK. HOW ARE YOU HAPPY WHEN ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO BE ON THE INTERNET WITHIUT SEEING EVERYTHING BAD IN THE WORLD. THE ONLY WAY TO BE “HAPPY” IS TO BE AWAY FROM LITERALLY EVERYTHING, HAVE EVERYTHING CONTROLLED AND PERFECT. AND HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO ISSUES. UNTIL YOU DIE. BECAUSE EVERYTHING ELSE, WALKING DOWN THE STREET, EATING, SLEEPING. EVERYTHING JUST REMINDS YOU THAT SOMEONE ELSE IS CONSTANTLY SUFFERING FOR NO FUCKING REASON AND THERES NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT BECAUSE YOURE A CHILD. AND SOMEHOW ADULTS DONT CARE. THEY DONT CARE ABOUT THE DEATHS. THEY DONT SEE THE BLOODSTAINS ON EVERYTHING AROUND THEM. THEY SOMEHOW AVOID IT ALL.

WHY ARE YOU HAPPY? BECAUSE BEING SAD. BEING ANYTHING ELSE. IS TOO DIFFICULT. WHAT ARE WE JUST SUPPOSED TO ROLL OVER WHEN SOMEONE ASKS IF YOURE OK? NO. BECAUSE THIS IS HOW EVERYTHING WOULD GO

“hey man, you ight?”

“NO I AM NOT ALRIGHT, EVERYTHING IS AWFUL EVERYTHING IS BAD. THE “GOOD” IS MOSTLY JUST GASLIGHTING, A SUNNY LITTLE PICTURE OF FALSE HOPES AND PROMISES TO CALM YOU DOWN AND KEEP SOCIETY FUNCTIONING BECAUSE IN REALITY EVERYTHING IS BAD, THE BAD COMES SO MUCH AND THE GOOD IS SO SPARSE YOU HAVE TO PHYSICALLY REMIND YOURSELF OF IT, AND IF EVERYTHINGS OK WOULDNT IT BE EASY TO FIND OUT GOOD NEWS INSTEAD OF DIGGING THROUGH THE INTERNET TO FIND ANYTHING? ISNT IT RIDICULOUS THAT WE ARE LABELLED AS “MENTALLY ILL” FOR HAVING FUCKING COMMON SENSE? WE ALL REALISED AS SOON AS WE GAINED SENTIENCE

“HEY WOW, ACTUALLY THE WORLD IS KINDA HORRIBLE!” AND INSTEAD OF FIXING IT EVERYONE ELSE WAS LIKE “YEAH BRO MAYBE YOU SHOULD TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT THAT, YOURE CRAZY. THE WORLD ISNT AWFUL! LOOK AT OUR LITTLE RICH WHITE NEIGHBOURHOOD, EVERYTHING IS PERFECT AND NOTHING IS WRONG! YOU ARE STUPID FOR THINKING THIS.”

LIKE BRO. NO??? ITS NOT OK? I DONT “GET SAD” I AM SAD. THIS ANXIETY DEPRESSION, COCKTAIL NEVER SUBSIDES. IT IS JUST IGNORED. REPEATEDLY. BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO FORGOT TO SURVIVE.

YOU HAVE TO GRIT YOUR TEETH, WIPE YOUR EYES AND DISSOCIATE. BECAUSE YOU KNOW DEEP DOWN IN YOUR HEART THAT NOTHING WILL EVER CHANGE FOR THE BETTER. YOU HAVE TO HAVE THE MINDSET OF:

“Well Im alive now, I might as well enjoy it” BECAUSE THAT IS LITERALLY ALL YOU CAN DO.

I WANT. TO BELIEVE. IN THE POSITIVES.

WE ALL DO.

BUT LOOK AROUND.

IT WOULD LITERALLY TAKE A MIRACLE, NOT A SMALL ONE. A NATIONAL. WORLD WIDE. MASSIVE MASSIVE MASSIVE MIRACLE. TO FIX THINGS.

BUT THATS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.

YOU CANT EVEN TAKE COMFORT IN RELIGION BECAUSE RELIGION IS LIKE “yeah no everythings gonna be like really bad and get worse and worse until everyone dies”

like. SERIOUSLY.

so NO. I am not “ok” and if you are. Congratulations. You’ve achieved a level of ignorance I TRULY wish I could obtain.

you wanna know why NO ONE TALKS LIKE THIS?

BECAUSE IF EVERYONE ON EARTH KNEW THIS. EVERYTHING WOULD COLLAPSE.

And I’m not saying you can’t be happy. YOU CAN! I am often happy! I have a lot of good moments. Life is worth living! Until a certain point you can always experience joy. There will always be SOMETHING. Good.

I’m sorry it sucks. I want it to change, I want to be happy. I want to go outside knowing that there’s a future, that there isn’t just misery ahead of me.

but I can’t do anything about it.

I can’t seek therapy. I can’t tell anyone.

because all they do is try and get me to be happy again, different strategies!! Different Methods! Different medication! So much medication :,D but I’m tired of people telling me not to be sad.

Stop trying to fix the individuals with drugs and cheesy advice.

FIX THE WORLD FOR US. THEN THE CHILDREN WONT NEED TO BE HIGH ON PAIN KILLERS TO BE HAPPY.

(I try to keep stuff like this to a minimum on my blog but at this point this is the only way I can safely put my opinion out into the world without being put into a mental hospital or yelled at.)

#tw vent #tw swearing #tw depressing thoughts #tw depressing stuff #tw drugs #tw death #cw vent #cw depressive thoughts #vent tag #vent post #vent

6 notes · View notes

violetwitch12087 · 1 year

Text

You go to comic con to see your favorite actor evan fucking peters and you see him while hes busy in the halls and he promises to get you a picture and he stays true to his word. In a unique way...

Promise?

I finally got comic con tickets to see evan fucking peters and ive never been more excited in my life i actually started crying when i got the tickets ive loved evan for so long and now that im finally going to be able to see him?! Literally dead on the floor. (My actual reaction if i ever meet him)

I start heading that way excited butterflies in my stomach going crazy i pull up and find parking which was pretty hard considering how many people are gonna be here i get out of my car and grab my phone and stuff i need before starting to head inside of the comic con building anxiety and anticipation filling my stomach as i walk into the building i pull out my phone and look at where i need to go

I see a lot of cosplayers with fucking awesome outfits i walk more down the halls i guess i could call them and i see im almost where i need to be i see someone being almost bombarded with questions from a surprisingly small group of people i try and look over them only noticing a almost familiar head of hair. Weird.

I see the person making their way past the group and start heading almost in my direction and thats when i see them. Him. Its evan fucking peters. My stomach drops nervousness filling my body as he makes it my way "hey evan" i stumble out loud enough for him to hear with a small wave as he gets closer "oh hey uh sorry im kinda busy right now but i promise ill get you a picture" he says my head turns to the side a bit "oh evan dont worry I don't want you to feel you owe me a picture its fine really" i say fidgeting with my fingers

"Oh come on, i promise ill get you that pic whats your name?" he says "uhm y/n" i say my breath catching up a bit evan peters just asked me my name "i swear y/n ill get you that pic" he says as he starts walking away people following, he probably says that to everyone, and he heads in the direction im supposed to go to so i follow the group of people making sure not to get close to them or something and we make it to the q and a room with a stage and i lot of chairs lined up i find my assigned seat and sit down lots of people filling the rest of the seats

My leg bounces anxiously around this many people and i watch as a guy picks up a mic and starts talking before yelling "evan peters!" And evan starts to walk out onto the stage doing a silly dance making me relax almost, he sits down at his assigned chair and grabs the mic pulling it closer to himself "hello everybody!" He yells and the croud goes wild a bright smile on his face and thats when everyone starts standing up to ask questions i would ask questions but im way too nervous that's my biggest insecurity

People ask many questions some about american horror story other about quicksilver and lots of his other movies and shows even ones im surprised people even know and evan always replies to them with much energy always cracking jokes or breaking out into song making me even laugh i mean who cant?

After almost 2 hours we finally get to the last question and the girl goes up to the mic getting ready to ask a question when evan stops her "wait, is there someone here a y/n here?" He asks and my eyes go wide "y/n here? Hello y/n?" He asks and my hand goes up evan not being able to see me "there was a girl who wanted a picture and i promised to give her one, y/n?" He says and people around me start to yell for his attention to be on me he finally looks in my direction and a smile makes its way onto his face "there she is!" He says pointing at me

I wave shyly everyone cheering around me "i promised to get you that picture after we're done come on back here" he says and i nod my head putting a thumbs up and everyone cheers again loudly and i sit back in my chair people around me cheering me on making me smile more

After the girl says her question and evan answers everyone starts to leave the room but evan grabs the mic "y/n please start making your way to the stage" he says and walks away from the mic and i shuffle through people to the stage where a guy is security maybe and he sees me and lets me go onto the stage another person leads me backstage where evan is "y/n! Oh i promised i would get you that picture i swear to my word" he says pointing a finger at me playfully a smile still on my face "thank you evan you're so sweet" i say as i start to pull my phone out and one of the guards takes my phone evan wraps his arms tightly around me smiling brightly into the camera and i do the same my arms wrapped around his torso

After the guard takes a couple pictures i take my phone back and turn to evan "thank you so much again evan you have no idea how much this means to me" i say and he shrugs his shoulders "who can turn down a pretty girl like you huh?" He says and a blush makes its way onto my face after a moment and evan looking like hes almost hesitanting he finally talks again "look uh, this is gonna sound weird but i think you're really beautiful and i would love it if you maybe gave me your number? Its fine if you dont want to like you said dont feel like you have to owe me your number" he says butterflies in my stomach messing up again

"Yeah no problem" i say and he hands me his phone and i put my number in with a little heart next to it he takes his phone back observing the contact a smile on his face "thanks can i take you out sometime?" He asks and i nod frantically the blush on my cheeks more noticeable this time and a wide smile on his face somehow gets wider "ill text you later" he says "you promise?" I ask

"Promise"

****************

This is so cute omfggg i actually love this so much i saw a video of evan calling a girl out for a pic cs he promised her one and he ended up finding her it was the fucking cutest thing ever but anyways happy mothers day *mwah mwah mwah* i love you so much bye bye my love

2 notes · View notes

quodekash · 1 year

Text

HELLO I FINALLY HAVE TIME TO WATCH THE FIRST OS2 SIMM EPISODE

im really hoping they do seanmaitee and not naysean for this, bc otherwise ill probably scream and riot. i love winnysatang with all my being, but their characters in this show shouldn’t be a couple in my opinion (if you ship them i have absolutely no problem with that). from memory (and i binged simm not too long ago so i think my memory is reliable), they’re literally only in the same room together once, and they dont even interact at all. SEANMAITEE, ON THE OTHER HAND, were SO CLEARLY being built towards in the show (the way maithee would hit on so many people, and sean would constantly stop him, but then when sean watched someone else hit on daonuea but didnt stop him, and the way sean always has a protective arm around maithee, and gejrdhfbghr i could talk about them forever honestly), and then the COWARDS freaking DIDNT MAKE THEM OFFICIALLY CANON???? im so salty about this and need confirmation and i will be Angry™️ if they do naysean instead of seanmaitee

anyway, time for the actual commentary to begin (that was a really long introduction, damn) (future egg here to tell you: it gets worse. the commentary is really long on this one. it’s mostly keysmashes about seanmaithee. good luck.)

THIS IS PROMISING, VERY VERY PROMISING, PLS P’NEW AND SCREENWRITERS AND GMMTV AND STUFF, DON’T CHICKEN OUT LIKE YOU DID LAST TIME

im actually stressed out why am i stressed out

im genuinely scared for what’s gonna happen

what if they do naysean

theyd better not do naysean, PLEASE

grebghreb

(im literally 20 seconds in, why cant i just watch stuff without needing to spam my thoughts)

THESE FLASHBACKS ARE SO SWEET

SIMM HAS BEEN SITTING IN THE BACK OF MY MIND BC EVERY OTHER SERIES IVE WATCHED SINCE THEN HAS BEEN SO MUCH MORE BRAINROTTY THAN THIS ONE BUT I STILL LOVE THEM

“i still love daonuea, i love daonuea, and i love daonuea” ITS SO FREAKING SWEET WHAT THE HELL

this has definitely been said before by like everyone, but something i love about this series in particular is how kluen was terrible at showing his emotions and feelings and inner thoughts, he was this blank slate going around and showing nothing. but then, as the series progresses, he tries harder to show nuea that he likes him. but my boy doesnt have it figured out yet, and there’s communication errors and it seems like he’s pushing himself on nuea and it seems like an unhealthy/toxic relationship, but it’s not, he’s just autistic and doesnt know how to communicate his emotions and he’s trying for the first time and doing it wrong but he’s trying. and then it gets to the last episode (or two? i cant remember) and theyre so happy and fluffy and good vibes and its because he’s finally figured it out, he just has to say ‘i love you i love you i love you’ and even pronounce it to the world ‘I LOVE DAONUEA’ so that everyone knows and so that nuea knows and so that they can both finally understand and be happy and ghrbghrb they make me happy

that was so incoherent but you probably get the gist of what i mean

okay im gonna stop ranting now, im still only a minute into the episode lmao

HELL YES THIS FREAKING INTRO

MY FREAKING BOYS

THEYRE COMING BACK NEXT WEEK

ANJGHBERJDHGBERHJBGEHRAAAAAA

sorry this post is supposed to be about simm, ill try to keep the eclipse keysmashes to a minimum

AND PUENTALAY ARE COMING BACKKKK

im much more excited about puentalay than i was last week since i rewatched vvs a few days ago

NOOO THE LITTLE HAND KISS- IM GONNA CRY

TINNGUNNNNN

sorry i should stop freaking out about the shows that are coming and start freaking out about NUEAKLUEN THEYRE BACK HELLO MY BOYS

GUY4ERGHKBER SATANG

HELLO SATANG

ILY

ILY A LOT

AND MAITHEE STANDING NEXT TO SEAN AND STARING DIRECTLY AT HIM LIKE THERES NOTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD HE SHOULD BE STARING AT?? THIS IS PROMISING

kluen why are you slightly late

he’s gonna profess his love for nuea in front of all the freshmen isnt he

i know he’s gonna do it

“that’s the hottest senior from the faculty of dentistry” yup. absolutely. he’s gonna profess his love in front of all the freshmen

if he doesnt profess his love in front of all the freshmen, then im a bar-ba-loot from the lorax

yUP

im shaking my head in a supposedly disappointed way rn but im actually smiling bc i love him

he’s so pretty and in love with his pretty boyfriend and their love is pretty

HIS FREAKING SHIPPER FACE

SEAN’S KNOWN FOR LONGER THAN ANY OF THEM AND I FREAKING LOVE HIM

omg he did like a little sway and nudged maithee a little bit with his shoulder ghjerbgdh

by the way im gonna switch between spelling it maitee and maithee cos idk which one is right so im playing both sides, so you’re just gonna have to deal with that

(there’s a high likelihood that no one’s noticed the spelling alternations and now that ive pointed it out everyone’s gonna be hyperaware of it, but its fine)

he knows what he just did

“i just wanted to make it clear from the start in case some freshmen hit on you” i love him

also i was about to say that kluen is supposedly the hottest senior, so shouldnt he be more worried about himself getting hit on, but then i remembered that in this universe dao is the sun and everyone else is the solar system revolving around him, so of course the freshmen would try to hit on him lmao

except for sean.

sean’s a moon revolving around maitee

THE HANDS THE FREAKING HANDS LOOK AT THEM HOLDING HANDS

I KNOW THEYRE DATING AND THEY HAVE BEEN FOR LIKE A YEAR

BUT I JUST LOVE HOW THEYRE SO OPEN AND FREE AND HAPPY AND IN LOVE AND I LOVE THEM AND THEY LOVE EACH OTHER AND I SWEAR IM OKAY (im not okay)

“but after meeting you again, i knew i must start loving you. there’s no way i will let go of you again” THIS MAN IS GONNA MAKE ME FREAKING CRY WHAT THE HELL THAT’S SO FREAKING SWEET

THEY LOVE EACH OTHER

AND IT’S SO RAW AND PURE AND GHJRBDGHRB

HIS FREAKING SMILE, HE LOVES HIM SO MUCH

“you’re shy, so you’re walking away, darling” dARLING-- IM DYING

fun fact, i was watching vice versa with italian subtitles and at one point one of them called the other ‘darling’, which is ‘tesorino’ in italian, and i knew that the suffix -ino means ‘little’, so i looked up what ‘tesoro’ means and it’s ‘treasure’, whcih means if you’re calling someone darling in italian youre calling them ‘little treasure’ and i just think that’s so sweet 🥺😭

I LITERALLY JUST GASPED

THEYRE STANDING NEXT TO EACH OTHER

AND IT’S MAITHEE’S ARM AROUND SEAN INSTEAD OF THE OTHER WAY AROUND???? PLEASE TELL ME THAT MEANS WHAT I HOPE IT MEANS

HE’S SO FREAKING HAPPY, IT MAKES ME HAPPY

CONTAGIOUS HAPPINESS

GRJKGB

ARE WE ABOUT TO GET A FULL FREAKING SCENE WITH THEM???

or am i clowning

i was expecting just crumbs but pLEASE TELL ME THEYRE GIVING US A FULL SCENE

PERHAPS EVEN TWO SCENES

honestly just let pawin’s characters be happy and gay

also i find it funny that the order theyre going in is the first three are all of pawin’s in a row

(and in all of them he’s gonna get a happy and gay side character plot line??? please????????)

gosh darnnit nuea is in the scene now

perhaps there will be something later in the episode? maybe in tonight’s episode??

THE SHOULDERS THE ARM AROUND THE SHOULDERS IS PAWIN FINALLY BECOMING MORE PROTECTIVE OF SEAN IS HE FINALLY REALISING HIS FEELINGS FOR SEAN AND/OR FINALLY BECOMING OPEN ABOUT HIS FEELINGS FOR SEAN PLEASE TELL ME THAT’S WHAT THAT IS

THE ARM AROUND THE SHOULDERS IS A METAPHOR

OR SOMETHING

MAYBE

let me dream, okay

ya know who else ignores everyone and focuses only on the person he loves intently? sean

maithee why is your voice so croaky

is that just pawin putting on a particular voice for the character

or was pawin sick

or is maithee sick

if its one of the last two, i hope he’s okay (be it the character or the actor)

so... the croaky voice was intentional?

THE L O O K

sidenote, satang is so freaking pretty. why. who decided that.

MAITEE ARE YOU COPYING THEM??? PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE COPYING THEM

SEAN WHY DID YOU LEAN AWAY YOUVE BEEN IN LOVE WITH HIM FOR YEARS

it’s the fate of The Captain

just ask tiw, he knows how it feels

or wat, also ask wat

or aoi and jack

or- sorry ill stop lmao

kluen arent you a dentist. why are you sitting at nursing.

idk how dentist school works

did he have to go through nursing stuff to get to dentisting?

im an arts and literature kid, idk what im talking about

OMG, STRAIGHT PEOPLE??

this is a rare phenomenon, folks

hello straights / straight presenting potential future couple

omg its literally been nearly an hour since i started watching and im still only 8 minutes into the episode

OR, PERHAPS, LESBIANS???

there could be anything, really

in my mind, every single character in ever single piece of media is pansexual until proven otherwise

bro you’re leaning into each other so much, JUST KISS

also i sense that sean’s about to become the unwilling captain of yet another ship (but he secretly loves it)

kiss.

lmao theyre not sponsored by the anime sparkling water, it’s just normal water, the little plebs

soundwin were sponsored by the anime sparling water

and then tiwpor were

but soundwin did it first

soundwin always did it first

anyway, it’s seanmaithee time not soundwin time

KISS. (again, the frEAKING ARM OVER THE SHOULDER GHBRHGB)

there was a slight scene change and i thought that meant that maybe we wouldnt see much of them for a while, but nOPE, THEYRE EVERYWHERE

i wouldnt be surprised if they were behind me right now

hello seanmaitee, how are you today

(i wish)

lmao they even blurred the water bottles in post just so that everyone knows that THIS ISNT A SPONSOR

THEY BACK TO THEIR ROOTS, SEAN’S HAND ON MAITEE’S SHOULDER

BRO YOU’RE ALWAYS SMILING AT HIM IN MOMENTS WHERE IT DOESN’T FEEL LIKE IT FITS THE CONTEXT TO BE SMILING AT HIM

YOURE IN LOVE WITH HIM

KISS HIM

“you two see that kluen and i are in love, but let me tell you that-” THAT YOU TWO ARE ALSO IN LOVE???? “we actually love each other much more than what you see” DANG IT I WAS WRONG

im right tho. seanmaithee are in love.

HES SO UNNECESSARY AND DRAMATIC, I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

im sorry what the hell does that mean

omg maybe its because he knows how to make people jealous because he knows that he’s always made sean jealous and he knows that now because theyve already confessed to each other and theyre already dating???????

im definitely clowning but shut up i dont care

whoop, helmet putting on time

(guess what, soundwin did that first too-)

i smell a sponsorship in this motorbike thingy

this makes me so happy

why does this make me so happy

he knwos him so well and knows he loves art and stuff

so he wants to take him to buy watercolour

i love them

i love them so much

grhgbtrhbgfr

OH HE EVEN KNEW HE WAS RUNNING OUT OF WATERCOLOUR??? BROOOOOO

theyre so sweet

sorry im tryna take the commentary down a notch because this is long enough already lmao

FINALLY, IM FINISHED 1/4

THAT TOOK WAY TOO LONG

IT WAS ONLY LIKE 15 MINUTES LONG AND ITS BEEN OVER AN HOUR SINCE I STARTED

omg i just remembered i forgot to watch the mv for the ost for this

i was gonna do it like four times yesterday but i kept getting distracted and forgetting

dang it

OMG OISHI SPONSOR

I FREAKING LOVE OISHI SPONSORSHIP SEGMENTS

THEYRE MY FAVOURITE SPONSORSHIPS AND I CANT EVEN EXPLAIN WHY

is it just bc i love ice tea? that could very well be it

lmao nueakluen stirring things up just to make seanmaitee confused this is so funny

im loving this storyline

we’ve barely seen it play out yet but i want typhoon to be happy and this is so nice

lmao what girls

seanmaithee are in love with each other, bro

aweeee little accidental kiss

FOREHEAD KISS

“CAN I KISS YOU”

and he asked in ENGLISH

its always so offputting whenever they speak english for like one sentence bc im never expecting it

i love it

but also i hate it

why are you speaking english

stop speaking this rubbish language

it sucks

a lot

its the worst language

keep speaking thai, please

AWW KISSEEEE

“of course” STOP IT WITH THE ENGLISH, PLEASE

AWWWWWEEEEEHBRDHFGBREHJDG KISSSSSS THEY KISS

HAPPY

“you only kissed one cheek so i only open one eye” hes so silly (affectionate) i love him

brEAKFAST IN BED???

EGWSVFHGSGV “will you eat breakfast first or eat me first” bro

THE FAKE DRAMA THEYRE STIRRING UP- THIS IS SO FUNNY WHAT THE HELL

GEIRHBDGHREDB TYPHOON AND... i forgot her name. the girl. TYPHOON AND THE GIRL THEY MEAN SO MUCH TO ME

shes so pretty

THE FAKE ARGUMENTS

ITS SO FUNNY

KLUEN’S GETTING SO INTO IT HIS ANGER LOOKS SO REAL OMG

mIN, THAT’S HER NAME, MIN

“if this thing makes them break up, let’s get ordained, shall we?” the way this is worded it sounds like some kind of marriage proposal

“i told you i already have a date with a girl” NOOOOOOOOO

noooooo, maithee had a date with a girl, and the only other person other than their group that’s going on the trip thing is nay, and theyre definitely gonna do a naysean thing, gosh freaking darnnit

unless they dont

unless maitee only had the date so that he could try and get over his feelings for sean bc hes convinced himself sean doesnt reciprocate, but my hopes are not high

BUILDING A HOUSE TOGETHER???? PLEASEEEEE

theyre so freaking in love i love them so much

LITTLE KISSE i love when they little kisse

damn its over now

NOOOOO IN THE PREVIEW THERES A SUPER CLEAR NAYSEAN THING

I LOVE WINNYSATANG A LOT BUT WHY CANT IT BE SEANMAITHEEEEEEEE

pls i just want pawin’s characters to be happy and gay in every single os2 episode that he’s in

and because seanmaithee hAVE to be together

AAAAAA

welp i take too long to watch things and now the next episode comes out in a little under 2 hours, and i started watching this about two hours ago so thats fun

#quodekash watches our skyy 2 despite desperately needing to sleep #quodekash annoys everyone about star in my mind (im so sorry)#star in my mind #star & sky #khabkluen #daonuea #nueakluen #kluennuea #kluendao #seanmaitee #seanmaithee #joongdunk #joong archen #dunk natachai #typhoonmin #mintyphoon #pepper phanuroj #pawin kulkaranyawich #satang kittiphop

3 notes · View notes

b1zmuth · 4 months

Text

Welcome To Hell!

Episode 1

‘’The Light and the Dark’’

´A new beginning, a new end to a tale thats already been told.´

-----------------------

I can't even think about the last time I've seen the light of that once beautiful, cloudy land.

Every time my mind goes back to decrypting that horrid CREATURE... I need help remembering the events.

‘’DUDE! WAKE UP!’’ a smaller voice whisper-shouted in my ear, instantly sending shivers down my spine as I awoke.

‘’What? You know he made us work the fields last night. I just want to get some rest.’’ I responded whilst I rolled over and closed my eyes shut again.

‘’Doesn't matter... I need to show you something BIG.’’ The voice said again, now climbing on top of me and harshly shoving me from side to side

‘’Ugh!’’ I groaned while opening my eyes before turning to the taller, but younger figure on top of me.

‘’What time is it?’’ I asked

‘’It's time for us to GO. there's not much time left- and this might be my only chance of getting someone else on my side!’’ the figure spoke once again whilst pulling off the covers and pulling me out of the bed.

‘’Calm down. Im coming- do you not realize how you just- huh?’’ I questioned looking up at the sudden sound of metal scraping against the ceiling.

The taller figure stuck its head out and an arm, beckoning for me to come over.

‘’Really? How cliche of you, going through air ducts?’’ I said whilst smiling

‘’Suck it up cleaner boy. I know your curious now- but I promise ill explain once you see it for yourself as well.’’

Crawling through the tight vents and silently coughing due to the lack of maintenance, all I could think about was the endless amount of allergies I would have to endure after this.

Suddenly, the figure in front of me stopped moving and rolled on its side, and started saying something,

‘’It's gonna be a tight fit but, I need you to help me catch this vent door, you know good and well we are going to have a BALL dealing with him if we do get caught,’’

‘’Really? IF? You don't say! If a loud banging metal object goes crashing down to fully quartz flooring wouldn't alert everyone within a 50 mile radius? Shocker!’’ I laughed only to be met with a small giggle from my friend in front of me.

Im not a bad friend, of course, I had to help him.

‘’Hup!’’

‘’Jeez, that drop was tough. Are you okay Koi?’’ my friend asked lightly smiling at me

‘’You know, being a foot shorter than you is unfair.’’ I responded, rolling my eyes and placing the vent entrance down on the floor

‘’I mean, you did just jump out of a 99% trippable hole with an entire vent grate in your hands, i would be impressed if i was you!’’ he laughed in response

‘’Zip it Josh.’’

I sat there.

Mouth fully agape.

Looking at the horrific sight that lied infront of my very own eyes.

Our “God’’ was infected. Has returned.

‘’Koi? Koi! Snap out of it!’’ Josh said to me whilst shaking me pretty harshly

‘’Huh? What?’’ i responded, snapping out of my daze-like dream

‘’Look.. When i came here to do some of my sketching, i had the same experience as you have. Did you also hear the other voice?’’ Josh said in a panicked but weary tone

‘’Yeah.. I think so.. Do you know who spoke to us?’’ i asked, becoming weary of my surroundings aswell.

It was a simple mural room, designed and specifically made for our God(s), there were three waterfalls, and a small lit up statue of Noahs Ark.

‘’I-im not sure. But i know from experience whoever said ‘’has returned’’ cannot be one of our allies.’’

‘’What are you two doing here.’’

Me and Josh both quickly turned around to look and see who had said that only to be greeted with the Upper Sun, Castiel.

Castiel was one of the most mysterious Upper Suns, mainly because he seemed very uninterested in talking to HIM. he was also known as one of the cleanups..really? Nobody never knew as to why or how he knew where people were sticking their noses in places where they shouldnt have been.. But he was very lenient on us, usually sticking around to watch us do our meddling child-like business.

I miss him. Where did he go?

‘’You two arent supposed to be here, especially not with the moon in full rise. You two are SUPPOSED to be asleep.’’ Castiel questioned us, flipping his spear to point the sharp side at himself, and pointing the blunt end of his spear at us.

‘’We…’’ Josh started off, but i quickly realized that he was going to dig an even DEEPER grave for us, and cut him off.

‘’Doing some late night walks. Josh couldnt sleep and we decided to take a nice stroll, but we ended up getting cold and wandering off into here.’’ i said, trying not to laugh and break face infront of Castiel

‘’Your two are the worlds worst liars.. Ha, maybe ill join you for your little stroll.’’ Castiel said whilst lowly giggling to himself about the whole situation.

‘’Cmon now, dont make my job harder than it already is!’’ Castiel said whilst trying not to laugh and shooing us back in the direction our quarters.

But he didnt lead us to our quarters, he took a sharp right, and led us to the edge of the gates.

Suddenly, the smile on his face dropped and he looked at us with a stern face and said..

‘’Im giving you a choice of life or death. You can stay here and figure out the truth and try to save everyone, or you can go and become a fallen angel in Hell. its better than what this place will become in a while. But staying here will result in your death.’’

We only gave the taller and bigger angel in front of us a confused but content look.

As we watched a single tear fall from his blue eyes, he bowed down and whispered an apology.

‘’I hope he just sends you as a fallen angel and doesn't hurt you two. I would never forgive myself for letting you stay by my side.’’

‘’This is about what we saw.. Isnt it?’’ i asked whilst sitting down next to Castiel and giving him a awkward side hug

‘’I cant explain much about it but, yes. I want you to meet someone soon, they will protect you. But for now, pretend as i have never known you- staying near and close to me will make him target you too.’’

Feeling the hot and mournful tears fall from my eyes and leave marks on my cheeks- i couldnt help but wonder what Castiel knew about this realm, and why did he compare the sinners land to the peaceful afterlife of Heaven.

‘’You need to go home, they know we were here. You may not be able to fool me with your silly lie, but with anyone else you can. I can deal with most of the repercussions anyways.’’

If only I had stayed with him.

====================

My head hurts.

Well, considering how i just landed flat on my face after falling 50000+ miles, would be a pretty much expected response.

Starting to look around at my newfound surroundings, i noticed a brightly lit sign up ahead- so i dusted myself off and pulled the gigantic splinter out of my hand and walked up to it, inspecting it and reading what it said.

‘’WELCOME TO HELL! YOUR NEW GUILTY PLEASURE LIES AHEAD.’’

Cheeky.

I also noticed that there was a small booth box with a older looking demon inside of it- walking up to it i got ready to speak but was interrupted by the woman speaking.

‘’Another one? Jesus facking christ! You little angels are dropping like flies down here! *HACK* *COUGH* name and registraaaaaation pleaze.’’ the clerk lady said whilst puffing her lung cancer smoke in my face.

(eugh.)

#fallen angel #angels and demons #new story #tumblr fyp #longpost #long reads #chapter story

0 notes

chirpsloth · 10 months

Text

its been like 17 minutes since i told myself id do homework i need to do it but i just spent all that time reading through all my tumblr post...

god i hate myself

not bc of the homework thing ill get it done but because of just reading the posts

not really i dont think

i just hate myself

but not actually

just a little

maybe i feel bad for myself...

no self pity is lame

god do i hate myself?

when i read the posts i know edxactly what ii was refering to at the time... but i dont think i make my psots easy to decipher all the time

like when i saw the posts that said "im so nervous" and "nervous nancy" followed by the psot a few hours later saying wtf why do i actully have rizz" and then "wtf is wrong with me" im like: oh my god!! i know why i was posting that at the time!! like wowowowow thats how i was feeling thats wild!

i really do feel for myself.. why am i this way???? everyone probably pities themself sometimes.

idk i didnt deserve that... and i shouldnt do that.. wouldnt trade it for anything though. i wont stop though

im not evil im just human

im just learning

im scared for when i reach the age where i cant say that anymore...

is everything gonna be okay?

everything IS okay. i get GREAT grades, i have a good home life, i have 2 close friends, i get to walk and listen to music all the time...

i think that part of it is jealousy but theres always a wishing to get worse you know?

i don't think i'll ever be fejwlfjew but i think thats okay... im happy. i think. edcept for when i think about things too much

i pity myself

i guess i pray to the future me. you know? i wonder if i typed all my old posts knowing that the future me would read them and be like a therapist from another time...telling msyelf not to worry. i think i just did it because i need to say things and i dont have anyone that i call spew all my dumb stuff to without annoying them or making them think im mentally ill which i am not.

plus i need a place to be self centered. i guess this is that... some place hwere i only talk about me. im okay with no one listening irl because i dont want to portray myself as insane. there are some things that can only be written too. i wouldnt want to talk to my therapist about a lot of things because i dont want him thinking im insane. i know thats a therapists job but im saying like theres stuff that i really shouldnt say.. scared maybe. i wanna educate myself on law or soemhitng so i know what my therapist can tell my mother or can get me admitted for.

do i even want help? i seriously dont think so. the better i get the worse i want to get. right now im in a good middle ground. im happy, i dont cause conflict in the house too much, im not exhausting myself, i get things done, life is pretty okay. sometimes i will participate in some efwljfkwel activities though. maybe thats just my way to cope. its not harming anyone,, and i really dont believe its harming the present me too much.

maybe itll harm the future me like how my past decisions currently hurt me. not out of regret but out of pity. it just hurts that i did that... you know?

i really should do my homework but i have time (Not really)

im thinking of doing the bare minimum rn and waking up extra early to finish everytihng up. probably what i wanna do.

i know its only been a week of school since the weekend (weird way to phrase it??) but i need a break. im fine with school its not tiring or anything but god i need a break from life. not like life life but i mean hanging out with people, having things i need to do, etc. i need a week where im all alone. i love my friends but god i need alone time. i always feel so guilty when i dont hang out with them though because i dont wanna be lonely or lose friendships so i find myself hanging out with my friends mainly to "maintain friendships". i love them so much but please i need time.

this post is making me sound so mentally unwell but im doing so fine i promise (who am i promising?)

god

why is my heart rate so fast

lemme count it rq

okay its actually pretty normal its 80-ish bpm but it feels fast

i feel so shaky

i wonder if its the sugar i had earlier... i know some foods or larger amounts of fodos always make my heart feel fast and make me shaky but i havent really discovered what foods those are.

im always so nervous posting on here because what if i say something that makes this all tracable to me. i dont wanna lose opportunities beause of some dumb tumblr posts.

i know i should use like my journal or something but its comforting knowing that this can be viewed by someone for some reason. i mean id be mortified if someone told me they read all my posts but idk. maybe also its nice because i can always lose a physical notebook or lose the passord to my google docs but tumblr is public and i can always look at this tomfoolery from another account. plus this feels less formal. in my actual physical journal im very messy and i get sucked in when i write but its so messy its unreadable, it cramps my hand, and sometimes feels inconvenient. on my actual online journal i established it as something more formal... for life and mental updates for myself. im scared

i dont know why but im so scared

im so so so scared

god why did i just feel like i was about to cry

i want to curl up and cry so loudly in my moms lap while she tells me its okay but i cant i cant i cant. if i did she would think im mentally unwell which im not and id be such an inconvience to her.

last time i cried in her arms she told me that i gotta "say everything" to my therapist and that he can help me. help me with what?? she said that i deserve someone good that can help me? i told her that im normal.. she told me that she didnt want a normal daughter she wanted a happy daughter. i am happy. i just repeated that im normal because i know she sees me as different in some way. i see her as different in soem way too. i think i'd see my sister different than everyone else if i didn't judge her so much. i feel so insensitive but i always invalidate my sisters issues/struggles because i feel like i had it worse and that she has it so well. i konw its so bad and i need to remind myself that... she is a human being, she will struggle, and i should be happy that what i was so used to makes her suffer... im glad she's not used to badness like i was. that makes me sound so emo but you know. i just invalidate her so much.

anways. i think that seeing someone so closely..knowing them almost better than you know yourself will make you see them as less normal. or something. i dont know. i know my mom sees me as different. i doubt she sees my sister as so different than society. maybe its because im socially a little odd. she thinks i try to push people away/unsettle them. i dont. im just awkward around a lot of people. i like telling myself that im not everyones cup of tea. maybe thats just a way to excuse my social stupidity. my best freind always asks me how can i find myself socially stupid if im friends with like everyone. maybe shes right, but i dont think os. im not friends with anyone. weve just been conditioned to be nice to everyone and people are nice to me. yes people trust me, yes i have inside jokes/ get alogn with a lot of people... but do you seriously think i hang out with them outside of school? we use the word freind too loosely. if i never text someone, we only talk in school, and never hang out outside of school... no matter how much we know about each other, no matter if we've seen each other cry, no matter how long we've been "friends," we are NOT friends and thats okay. i try to be agreeable. people think im funny at least.

i need my mom to hug me and let me cry into her arms but i dont want her judging me or worrying about me i just need my mom. god im about to cry. why do i make myself feel this way? this was just supposed to be a post about not doing my homework.. now im writing like a multiparagraph essay. i need to say things. i guess i need to organize my thoughts. speak to the void.

you know i think i write in this because i know that future me will read it... emaning that future me will be alive. meanign that i'll be alive in the future. meaning that everything will be okay. if future me is alive, it means she overcame things, and shes now smarter, and as she's reading these paragraphs, she remembers how she used to feel, and pities her old self once again. and then maybe writes more to the future future me. and the cycle continues. until im dead i guess. maybe someone else.. a child? will work as a future future future x1000 me.. i doubt it. i dont think someone will ever care about me as a person so much as to read everyting ive thought. im currently pretty much just writing my thougts. nothing is organized. im just rambling. i would film a video but i dont have space in my camera roll, and even if i did, i would never want a video of myself saying stuff. some things are better kept written. anwyays. hello future me. and the future me after that. etc. i wonder if im laughing at this in the future. probably... in some time in the future. i bet ill laugh while also pitying my current self. self pity is so lame.

speaking of children. honestly.

door is opening. my moms home. ive been writing for like an hour. homework for tomorrow i guess. ill maintain a convorsation with her while i write. actually maybe ill close my laptop and return to this later. i mean i could use the excuse that this is homework...

0 notes

forestryfae · 1 year

Text

its un fucking believeable. three times theyve been unable to pick me up from work cus i asked and they straight up forgot or just didnt bother actually fucking communicating with me. they keep fucking forgetting to wake me up or they do it way too fucking late. noone gives me any fucking information on anything i ask and somehow thats my fault because i didnt ask enough or pæay enough attention to something i didnt know about. im expected to know everything automatically with no input from other people and if im confused thats my fucking fault for being an idiot. everything is my responsibility, noone else is responsible for anything even if they promise theyre responsible for it. im supposed to try to be social but noone is willing to be social or try to meet me halfway and noone actually fucking engages or makes an effort. its my own fault im disappointed because i expected SOME kind of decency and i expected the exact same thing as they expected from me

anyways i now have to set a fucking alarm and buy a fucking bike cus thats the only way ill wake up at the time im supposed to since waking me up, ehich is on my fucking plan, isnt important, and getting me to work is my own job but fuck me if they forget to stop at my workplace 2 minutes after theyve started driving and fuck me if they leave without me and it wasnt my fucking fault.

the guy didnt even look at me or say anything, he ran out the door and then suddenly left, how the fuck was i supposed to know he was gonna drive. thats not normal. normally they fucking say something or let us know whos driving or actually fucking stop and say lets go, they dont just run out the fucking door without looking at you.

but thats my fault somehow because i didnt fucking know automatically he was driving because why the fuck would he be running out the door in a hurry without saying anything if im the only one there. why the fuck didnt they drive me to work.

but no i just "need to get yourself a bike" apparently because fuck me, im not allowed to be angry at the complete lack of information, lack of following through on agreements, zero fucking support unless i talk to either my primary or secondary and my secondary keeps fucking pissing me off, and complete disregard of my fucking existence. im allowed support and help but only if it suits everyone else. what the fuck am i even inpatient for theyre as useless as last time.

#talkies

1 note · View note

nemeseos-noctua · 3 years

Note

Hey darlings! Can I request Xiao, Albedo and Diluc separately carrying reader around for a day because of a bet they lost? Love yall! <3

𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: diluc, albedo, xiao (separate) x gn!reader

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: not proofread

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒: THIS TOOK SO LONG I’M SO SORRY ANON (i was busy and didnt feel like writing anything for like a month ☹ but im back and ill try and write more, esp since my school year ends in like a month and a half)

oh you could see so much

Diluc was so tall.... it was great

“is this what height feels like?”

despite you enjoying every second of it, the pyro typhoon was slowly suffering

HIS REPUTATION !! WHAT HAPPENS TO HIS REPUTATION ???

the answer is nothing (except that Donna is jealous and pissed)

“How much longer are we going to have to do this for?”

“The whole day, obviously! That was the bet!” you cheered, clearly enjoying where you were currently. His suffering for your enjoyment.

The red-haired man sighed and continued walking around, eventually drifting over to the giant tree in the middle of Windrise.

He stops next to the base of the oak tree, slightly lowering himself down. You weren’t exactly surprised that he could carry your weight, since he wields a giant claymore as a weapon, but you couldn’t feel not just the tiniest bit bad for him.

you guys were playing a guessing game as Diluc took a shift at Angel’s Share last night

“how much is venti gonna drink tonight”

you won, obviously

that damn bard drank at least 50,000 mora’s worth in dandelion wine

HE DOESNT EVEN PAY FOR IT IN MORA

and thats how you lose money in a business, children

You lowered yourself off of the man’s back, assuming that’s what he wanted.

“Hey, sorry about the bet...” you trail off, taking a seat on the grass and letting the wind graze your face.

“It’s fine. A bet is a bet.”

“Yeah but--” you stopped. There was absolutely no way that you would win this debate.

The pyro user looked at you after a few seconds of silence. You usually talked a lot more than this and strongly believed in sharing your thoughts, so what was stopping you now?

“You know what? Let’s just go to the winery and take a walk there together.” You begrudgingly got up from your spot from the cool grass and started to walk in the direction of the winery.

There were a few hurried steps coming from behind you, assumingly from Diluc, but you paid no mind to him. He probably just didn’t wanna leave you behind--

“Woah-- hey! Diluc, wh--”

“A bet is a bet.”

you found yourself on his shoulders this time

dude really ran up and lifted you onto his shoulders

like dipped under you

mans said “woOOP”

you would kill him but hes too hot for that 😉

You sighed.

A bet is a bet.

you were taller than the alchemist

not by much, but it was enough that it was wacky as hell

(i hc that Albedo isn’t super strong so he’s struggling even tho he’s a sword user-- tbh i thought that he was a catalyst at first lmao)

it’s so funny because Albedo is literally holding you like a baby being burped while doing some sort of experiment

“Stop kicking before I spill something on the both of us, (Y/N).”

“No.”

The blond sighed and continued to work on some kind of potion.

It was comforting to be in someone’s embrace again. How long’s it been? Years, maybe...

And soon enough, you fell asleep while the scholar cradled you in his arms.

i can assure you that he was FREAKING OUT

he was scared that he would wake you up if he put you down on the bed that the he occasionally would sleep on (he survives on caffeine)

but he needed to do this experiment

like... NEEDED to

“../N)..? (Y/N), wake up.” You whined in response, not really processing anything that was coming out of Albedo’s mouth. “You won’t be able to sleep later tonight if you continue with your nap.”

“..what time is it..?” you let out a large yawn and covered your mouth. Since you had just woken up, your brain had refused to function properly. And with that, it took you a while to realize that you were laying on a bed.

Albedo was still working on something (you weren’t sure what) but stopped to wake you up.

he’s cute

but he almost blew up

impressive how you didn’t wake up

“Only around sunset. Come, I’ll make dinner.”

the least i could say is that Xiao was not pleased.

HE WANTED TO COMPLAIN SO MUCH

but he didn’t wanna hurt your feelings 🥺

karmic debt was nothing compared to you feeling sad /j

karmic debt is horrible :( poor xiao

also being in crowded places was not fun for him

LANTERN RITE !! he did think that the xiao lanterns were cute

“Ooh, ooh, look! It’s a food stand,” you excited pointed out from on the yaksha’s back, “wanna get something? There might be almond tofu!”

“Only if there’s--”

“--almond tofu. Yeah, yeah, I know. It’s the only thing you can stomach. Mr. Dream Eater...”

That must’ve struck a chord in him. The “young” man kissed his teeth, showing a hostile attitude that he had never done to you.

“Just because I agreed to let you win doesn’t mean that I won’t go back on it.”

secretly he didn’t

he really enjoyed your company and hates everyone else

funny because he desires company and love but WHATEVER !

xiao loves you in some type of way

he adores you and all of your stupidity

and sometimes you mess up and it’s fine

it’s just a “mortal thing”

(he also makes mistakes but shh)

You remained silent until the two of you reached the food stand, filled with savoury smells and delicious aromatics. Though there was no almond tofu.

“You wanna try somewhere else? I don’t mind going to find a different spot.”

Xiao grumbled. Not like you were the one walking and exerting energy to get from one place to another.

“Fine.”

“Look... I promise this is gonna be the last place. If we don’t find any, we can go back to Wangshu Inn and ask Verr Goldet for some,” you reasoned.

The adeptus remained silent, but didn’t show any signs of displeasure. You took it as a yes.

“Wanmin restaurant has some, I think! It’s the best of the best in Liyue too.”

“This better be worth it.”

“Don’t worry, it will! I’ll even pay for it and everything!” He sighed, making his way toward the restaurant. Honestly, you didn’t wanna even get anything to eat. For the most part, it was just spoiling Xiao for once since he never went anywhere and only ate the almond tofu Verr Goldet made at the Inn.

I hope that you can be happy, at least for today.

#genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin #genshin impact #genshin scenarios #genshin imagines #genshin headcanons #xiao x reader #genshin impact scenarios #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact headcanons #albedo x reader #diluc x reader #genshin xiao #genshin albedo #genshin diluc #ririsann

816 notes · View notes

reidsnose · 4 years

Text

Black Eye

overview: reader and spencer go to reader's highschool reunion as a fake couple

genre: fluff i think

warnings: mild violence and swearing, a guy being kind of a total creep, and mentions of bullying

a/n: idk if its any good again just love the idea but it was inspired by a dream i had last night (thank you temporal lobe) so yeah let me know what yall think !! :) also im posting this at like ass oclock in the morning so whoops

masterlist

you and spencer had gotten yourselves in quite the situation.

your dreaded highschool reunion was just around the corner and you made the mistake of complaining about it to penelope. she was always trying to make everyones life easier (and more interesting) so when she heard you had no date she took it upon herself to find you one.

it didn't take a lot of looking, none at all actually; because Penelope had already been trying to figure out ways to get you and Reid together.

you two were undeniably perfect for each other. you were an amazing team at work, you hung out alone all the time (though both of you denied these hang out as being dates, Garcia had her own ideas on this), and you were both very obliviously head over heels for each other.

and somehow, through the magical ways of Penelope Garcia, you and Spencer were now sitting in the parking lot, fake married for your high school reunion.

"do we need to go over our back story again?" you worried, looking up at him.

"our backstory is basically all true anyway we just fall in love after a little bit. and i have an eidetic memory so i remember; you're my wife you should know this!" he joked, trying to relax you. "we got this! we're gonna be so married!"

Spencer had actually never been this nervous in his life but he was trying to be brave for you. it would be more embarrassing for you both to show up like nervous wrecks than if you had just come alone. he was just happy to get to be fake married to you.

"the marriedest!" smiled, fist bumping him.

"now lets go make some people jealous!" he chuckled getting out of the car and jogging over to your side, opening your door before you got the chance to; like a true gentleman.

you stuck out your hand which he happily took into his, neither of you commenting on the redness you both had sprinkled across your cheeks. as you walked in, you saw all the people you dreaded seeing.

the boys who tormented you were balding and the girls who made sure you felt awful everyday had wrinkles riddling there skin. you were surrounded by botched botox and bleached blonde to cover graying hair. you felt terrible to admit it, but you were a little happy to see that their beauty had faded like this; they made their looks their whole personality in high school, you couldn't help but wonder what was left for them to be. not that it mattered, but you and Spencer were undeniably the most attractive couple there.

you actually had an ok time, you had spotted a few of your friends that you hadn't seen in quite a few years and it was nice to catch up.

Spencer had wondered a bit, but not too far, he was talking to some guys who used to be in science club when you were younger. you smiled at the thought of what they might be talking about.

"y/n! hey youve really filled out!" you heard a gruff voice from behind you.

you turned around and were met with the very unappealing face of the ex quarterback. Spencers attention had been caught at the sound of your name.

"um..hello," you muttered, trying to covertly back away from him.

"i see youve got a ring, interesting i dont remember us getting married!" he said in an incredibly creepy tone.

"do you know im a federal agent now?" you said through a gritted smile.

spencer had already begun walking towards you, he could tell something was off.

"ill tell you what sweetheart," he put his hand on your shoulder, pulling you slightly closer to him, "you can put me in handcuffs any day."

you threw his hand off of you and drew back your fist, but were cut off before you could deliver the punch but his hand engulfing your own, and squeezing.

"THATS MY WIFE!" spencer yelled in a voice you had never heard from him before.in the blink of an eye he was standing between in front of him. "do not ever talk to her like that, let alone lay a finger on her or so help me God i will-"

"what beanpole? what are you gonna do? what if i did this?" the man asked.

and then he sent a swift punch to Spencer's face.

thats gonna leave a mark.

in a matter of seconds, Spencer had him overpowered, laying face first on the floor with his hands uncomfortably angled behind him, completely helpless.

"now i'm going to let you go and you're going to walk out of here unharmed. if you try anything like that again, ill let my wife handle you. and i promise if she gets a hold of you, you'll be a dead son of a bitch." Spencer muttered in the mans ear, gruffly pulling him up by his collar and shoving him towards the door.

"were leaving." you said, grabbing Spencer's hand, trying to ignore how incredibly attractive he looked right now.

"babe if you want to stay we can stay," he offered as if he didn't just have his shit kicked in by a coward with misogynistic tendencies.

"honey, i want to take you home," you smiled, liking the way it felt to call him a pet name. you walked into the parking lot, "what were you thinking?"

"i was thinking this guy is trying to hurt you and i was not going to ever let that happen." he answered confidently as you two reached the car. "plus this totally made the marriage thing more believable. i wouldn't get a black eye for just anyone."

"thank you. i'm sorry you got punched trying to protect me." you sighed, feeling incredibly awful about the whole thing.

he chuckled, "id do it again."

you fought hard against the blush creeping up your face.

"i gotta say, the black eye really suits you. you look pretty badass." you chuckled, trying to change the subject before it got too sappy and you said something you shouldn't.

"maybe it should just be my new look," he joked, looking down at a ping from his phone. "uh oh."

"we have a case?" you asked.

"yep. and hotch wants us in the office asap which means we cont stop by either of our houses." he sighed before starting the car.

the drive was mostly silent. but a comfortable silence. Spencer thought about how in the moment, he didn't care how many punches the guy threw at him, as long as it meant you were ok, he was willing to take it. he knew he loved you far before that moment but that truly solidified it.

at the same time you were thinking of how quickly your time as a 'married couple' was over. it felt so right to call Spencer yours. so unexplainably perfect for the two of you to be together. if only your time wasn't cut short by a sucker punch.

you neared the building's parking lot. you looked over at Spencer who you could very easily tell was lost in his own world.

"whats going on in that beautiful head of yours?" you asked, causing him to stifle a smile.

"just thinking." he answered.

"what about?"

"us." he stated, pulling into his parking spot.

oh. oh.

"do tell."

he hesitated, "if i tell you, and you disagree, do you promise it wont change anything about us?"

"i promise."

"did it feel right to you? us being together?" he asked, his eyes innocent and filled to the brim with a mixture of anxiety and adoration as he looked at you.

"yes. it absolutely did. and i was so mad at the assclown for cutting our time short," you admitted, "and punching you in the eye, obviously."

"i- i'm not sure how to ask this but- do you...would you..sorry i-" he stammered.

"yes."

you cut him off, pressing your lips to his. his hand gently cupped your face, deepening the kiss and you both felt like you were on cloud nine.

"thats exactly what i was trying to say," he cracked a dopey smile, causing you to chuckle.

"i've been trying to say it for so long." you confessed, causing him to smile impossibly wider, "we gotta go hotch is waiting."

"just one more kiss?" he asked, which you gave in to, obviously. and then another. and another.

maybe it was good thing that he got a black eye that day, because when you got to the office the whole team was so focused on it they didn't even notice the hint of your lipstick left on spencers lips.

ultra mega super cool taglist:

@mac99martin @imhreid @spencersmagic @hollydaisy23 @raelady1184 @a-broken-pact @padfootswife @hey-there-angels @star-stuff-in-the-cosmos

#criminal minds #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid #reid #garcia #penelope garcia #morgan #derek morgan #spencer reid x reader fluff #spencer reid fluff #fluff #hotch #prentiss #jj #rossi #cm #bau #bau x reader

997 notes · View notes