#incorrect empires quotes

[incorrect-esmp-quotes]

Katherine: *walking around disappointed after visiting an aquarium*

Shelby: Katherine, what did you think a tiger shark was?

[breadbridgebakery]

helllooo! are you a fan of life series (3rd life, last life, double life, limited life, and secret life) or empires smp? YOU SHOULD JOIN MY DISCORD SERVER!!!

(you don’t have to be a fan of both to join and enjoy the server, btw!)

we are all very silly and we have a lot of fun

[dragonflavoredcake]

Jimmy: You've gotta be tough, Scar! Show 'em you can't be pushed around! Show 'em they can't mess with you! Scar: Right. Yes. Tough. Got it. Scar, standing up on his barstool and slamming his hands down on the bar: I'LL TAKE A CHOCOLATE MILK

[strawberry-yougurt]

flower husbands :)

Scott: I want to be with you for the rest of my life. Jimmy: Damn, that sounds like a marriage proposal. Scott, getting down on one knee: That's 'cause it is.

Jimmy: Truth or dare? Scott: Truth. Jimmy: How many hours have you slept this week? Scott: Scott: Dare. Jimmy: Go to sleep. Scott: I don't like this game.

Scott: Did you buy eggs like I asked? Jimmy: Even better! Scott: What the fuck did you- Jimmy: holding up a chicken Her name is Fluffy.

Scott: I’ve only had Jimmy for a day and a half but if anything happened to them I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.

Scott: Y'know, I once knew a man who said to me: “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” He also had a pair of sideburns that would cause even Jude Law’s face to weep in forfeit. You put those lemons in a sack and beat your enemies with ‘em! And maybe if you beat ‘em hard enough the bag will split open and lemon juice will spray into their eyes, causing intense burning pains as you crush them into a citrus-y pulp! Jimmy: Wait, wait, wait, wait. Their heads or the lemons? Scott: Whatever caves first!

Scott: Okay, but what if we went to dinner not as friends this time? Jimmy: AS ENEMIES?! Scott:

Scott: What is this!? Jimmy: That’s the weight of guilt. Give in to the nice side. Help those unfortunate, and make the guilt go away, my friend. Scott: Ow! Make it stop! Jimmy: Surrender to your kindness, Scott. It’s nice to be nice. Scott: Your guilt is strong, my friend. But it is no match for the power of my selfishness!

Jimmy: I'm trash. Scott: As someone who's environmentally conscious, it's my duty to pick you up. Does 7 work for you? Jimmy: Jimmy: You smooth motherfucker. Jimmy: And yes it does.

Scott: You shouldn't be using a straw. Jimmy: I know, I know, it's bad for the environment and stuff. Scott: Yeah, but I mean… it's a weird way to eat spaghetti.

[entityredacted]

Scott: This world has been so harsh to me, I will never fall in love again, it only ends up coming back to bite me.

Scott's flirty idiot brain smacking him with a broom whenever Sausage or Jimmy is nearby:

NEED HOLD HAND

[alien-slushie]

Cop: You're receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.

Sausage: Dang it!

Jole: Wait, three?

Cop: Yeah?

Fwip: Oh my God, Jimmy fell off!

[thecustomcosplayed]

Scott: Fuck capitalism. It's a rigged system that keeps us poor and it isn't fair. You shouldn't need to work three jobs to afford basic necessities. Scott, playing Monopoly: Sorry, if you wanted to win you should have tried not being poor.

[maple-cloak]

HC/E!Gem: Like, I really want to teach yoga and zen and overall centeredness but I also like to really kill and STAB people on the weekends

[jimmytimmyjames]

"fuck the law" "obey the law" "i am the law" "😏" "😳" "🫥" empires smp season 2 incorrect quotes.txt

[galactic-empire-incorrect-quotes]

[jamespotterbbg]

my roman empire is that the actors for sirius and remus thought they were portraying a couple.

[incorrect-esmp-quotes]

Random cat: Meow.

Lizzie: You sly bastard, I never would’ve thought of that.

Scott: I’m sorry, but can she actually speak cat or is she just messing with us?

Joel: Knowing Lizzie… It may very well be both.

[i-only-see-daylight]

Aelin: If I died-

Rowan, sharpening his knives: Death will not get you out of this relationship.

[dragonflavoredcake]

Jimmy: Hermes got in a fight today. Sausage: Is he okay?! Joel: Did he win?!

[lyrichi]

mc: where were you during 9/11

solomon: banging your mother

mc: no you weren't

solomon: how would you know? you weren't born before 9/11

mc: that's besides the point

[not-mary-sue]

Phoebe: Don't you hate it when the ghost you develop a crush on almost ends the world.

Trevor: That's...not a universal experience.