#it's me and it's christmas does anyone expect anything else?

[grey-has-rusted]

^me when i am a sensitive person

[absurdthirst]

White Christmas {Joel Miller x F!Reader}

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 19.8k

Warnings: Post apocalypse setting, threats of violence, technically forced entry, survival, mentions of family death, virgin reader, Reader celebrates Christmas, oral sex (male and female receiving), vaginal sex, loss of innocence, fingering, somnophilia, Joel's a little horny, cum play, pull out method of birth control, face sitting, 69, anal play, slight angst

Comments: Finding a cabin right before a winter storm blows in seems like a gift. Finding it occupied with you - a Christmas celebrating virginal survivor, is Joel's own Christmas gift. Providing safety and security in and out of your bed and giving Ellie the Christmas she had always dreamed of.

A/N: Merry Christmas belatedly!!! Charlie and I meant to have this finished by Christmas Day but life and family got in the way. But it's finally here! Cheers!

Co-written with @storiesofthefandomlovers

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|| MasterList || Joel Miller MasterList ||

Click Keep Reading only if you have read the Rating and Warnings and understand the warnings may not be complete to avoid listing spoilers. As AO3 says 'creator chooses not to use warnings'. You also agree that you're the right age to be consuming anything here.

The temperature is dropping again, the chill making Ellie shiver as she pulls her jacket closer and follows behind Joel. There’s a heaviness to the air, it feels almost wet and Joel told her that meant it would snow today. They need to find a cave, a dilapidated building, something, and she wouldn’t complain about a fucking fire to thaw out her frozen fingers. “Joel-“

“I’m fucking working on it.” His tone is annoyed and she bites her lip. She hadn’t been about to complain, but he seems to think she is.”

“No, do you smell that?” She demands, sniffing the air loudly. There’s the scent of a fire in the air. Someone has to be nearby. 

Joel frowns, squinting as he tries to look into the distance. His eyes aren’t the same as they used to be. He fucking hates getting old. Sometimes, when his body aches and he misses Sarah too much, his mind goes back to that dark place that’s memorialized on his face. He grunts, “come on kid. Let’s see what it is. Probably assholes who want to kill us but let’s see.” He snorts and Ellie chuckles, knowing how hard life is in the wilderness. The only person she trusts is Joel. He leads the way through the snow until your cabin comes up in the distance.

Joel tightens his grip on the rifle and looks around carefully, aware that the area might be booby trapped or there might be some guards. The place looks too neat to be someone holed up for the coming weather. This is obviously someone’s home. “Fuck.” The first flurries start to fall as the wind picks up and there’s nowhere else to put Ellie. He’s just going to have to make sure that he gets the upper hand when surprising whoever is inside and hold them at gunpoint until the coming winter storm is over. “Stay close.”

Ellie nods, watching Joel as he walks towards the cabin, and she shivers when the snow hits her face. He’s exhausted, clearly needing to rest, and so does she. You don’t notice his approach, too busy humming a Christmas carol as you putter around the cabin that’s been in your family for a hundred years. You smile as the pine smell fills the air, the fire crackling. You don’t hear the slight jiggle of the locked door until it’s flinging open and a man holding a rifle strides in. “Get down!” He yells and you scream as you do as he says, laying down on the floor. Joel immediately comes over to pat you down, wanting to make sure you’re not armed. “Anyone else here?” He asks, standing up and swinging his body around to see if there’s another person in the cabin with you.

“Don’t- no! Please don’t- don’t hurt me!” You curse yourself for not putting the bar on the door but you had been expecting to bring in another few loads of firewood. “Please, I-“ you know that you are in very real danger, it’s not like you’ve been isolated from what the world has become, even if you’ve managed better than most. “Don’t- don’t hurt me.”

Joel growls as you don’t answer his question and he smacks his rifle down on the floor next to your face. “Are you alone?” He shouts out at you and you shake. “Are. You. Alone!” He yells. 

“Yes. Yes. I’m alone!” You cry and he stands straight, deciding to go through the house to make sure no one is hiding. “Ellie!” He shouts, calling the teenager in. “Aim your gun at her. She moves. You shoot.” He commands and goes around the cabin, opening every door and cupboard to make sure you’re alone once Ellie has her gun aimed at you.

You are shaking, only slightly relieved when the girl shows up. Somehow hoping that because there’s a younger girl, that some of the evils that could be visited on you, won’t be. “I - there’s no one else here.” You promise quietly. 

“He won’t hurt you.” The girl murmurs. “Not unless you try to hurt us.” Huffing quietly, you listen as this dangerous man shuffles through your cabin, your home. 

“You broke into my house, not the other way around.”

Joel comes back after realizing that you are indeed alone and he’s shocked. A woman in a cabin all alone. Something he hasn’t come across. “Stand up.” He orders, reaching down to grab your forearm and he practically drags you over to the chair at the dining table. “Ellie. Rope.” He demands, needing the rope from her backpack to tie you up. He doesn’t trust anyone. “No one coming back here?” He asks, wanting to know that there’s not an army of men coming back to this place.

“I- no, I’ve been alone for two years.” You admit, hating that fact. People don’t come here and you had burned and buried the last member of your family before the snow two winters ago. “Please, take what you want and - are you hungry? I have some stew, take it. Just- just don’t kill me….or worse.”

That makes Joel pause. You’re more scared of what he could do to you than being killed. That makes him feel sick. He never wants to be that kind of man in this horrifying new world. He swallows harshly and lowers his rifle from your face. “I ain’t gonna kill you.” He promises.

You bite your lip, trying not to show how scared you are. It’s not that you’re weak, you’ve survived the outbreak and the past twenty years since, but now you’re all alone. “Why are you- what do you want?” You manage. “Just take what you need.”

“We need a place to stay. Storm is coming. We can’t keep traveling in the wilderness without dying of frostbite. We need to stay here. You gonna let us?” It’s a rhetorical question but Joel is a gentleman enough to make it seem like you have a choice.

“You didn’t have to shove a gun in my face for a place to stay.” You frown. “All you had to do was ask. I’m not- you have a kid. What kind of monster would leave you two outside during a blizzard?”

Joel feels a little embarrassed now that he went so extreme but he is used to the dangers of this new world. “I’m sorry but I couldn’t take a chance. The kid- we have been used to some bad people.” He confesses, “I didn’t - I’m sorry.” He says, deciding to untie you just as Ellie says “you decorate for Christmas?” She asks, noticing the garlands and baubles placed around the cabin.

You’re confused by the turn of events but nod as the man starts to untie you. “I did.” You confess. “My Christmas tree is on the back porch. I was planning on decorating it after getting some more wood. Before the storm got too bad. It’s silly, but it makes me happy.” You shrug slightly, knowing how ridiculous it sounds.

“It’s Christmas.” Joel murmurs, remembering the holidays he spent with Sarah. He didn’t even know what month it was, let alone what day. 

“It’s so pretty.” Ellie coos, eyes wide at the bright colors and decorations you have clearly maintained since before the outbreak. 

“How do you know it’s December?” He asks out of curiosity. He only knows seasons.

“I’ve kept track.” You admit with a small shrug. “My dad had one of those organizers that had calendars for fifty years.” You snort, shaking your head. “We started making sure we kept track after the outbreak.”

Joel is equally impressed and peeved. Why would you keep track of the date when the fucking world ended? He doesn’t understand it. It’s all about survival. He glances around at the nostalgia. “I can’t - where’s the stew?” He asks, knowing that Ellie must be starving.

“It’s- the stove.” You nod towards the rustic kitchen. At the time, it had been considered quaint to have a wood burning stove and a water pump in the kitchen instead of the modern conveniences, but it had proven to be the best possible thing when the electricity went out. “It’s- I’ll fix you some bowls.” You promise, slowly standing up and watching him warily. “Warm yourselves. There’s a bathroom down the hall if you need to use it.”

Joel knows Ellie will want the bathroom. “You can go.” He tells her and she looks at him with gratitude before rushing down the hall. He watches you as you grab two bowls and pour the stew into it. He can’t believe you’re alone. Most women on their own…well, it’s a cruel world and all the women’s rights that were so hard fought went out the window when the pricks who were against them took over again with the new world. Joel is certain that you’re capable. You have to be if you’re still out here after so long in this small piece of paradise in the middle of nowhere. “So…you grew up here?” He asks, curious about you.

“I did.” You carefully ladle the hot stew and add a few of the coarse ground crispy corn bread rounds that you had fried up to go with it. Looking up at him to find him watching you closely. “I’m not going to poison you.” You promise. “You don’t hurt me and I’ll be happy to have guests for Christmas.”

Joel watches you for another second before he sits down, deciding to trust you but not enough to set his gun down away from him. When you set the stew down, he can’t help but groan softly. “Sorry. We, uh, we haven’t eaten for a few days.” He admits quietly, averting his eyes when you look at him in understanding.

“There’s plenty.” You murmur softly and move back over to the kitchen to get him and his daughter something to drink. “I’ve been lucky growing and canning vegetables. And I had just finished processing the deer I shot a couple of days ago.”

Joel is impressed but he doesn’t let that show as he watches you as you move around the kitchen. Ellie comes back a few moments later and her eyes widen at the hot food. “Holy shit this place is amazing.” She gasps before she sits down and starts to dig into the food. 

“Manners.” Joel reprimands her, shaking his head until he looks at you. “Sorry. She’s feral.”

You laugh and wave off his apology. “It’s good to know some things haven’t changed since the world went to shit.” You tell him, setting down glasses of water. “Later on, if you want, we can heat up some water for a hot bath. It’s probably been awhile?”

Ellie nods, opening her mouth with food in it. “Swallow first.” Joel reminds her and she dramatically swallows her food. 

“I would love a bath. Jesus, this place is incredible. How the hell haven’t you been killed?” She asks you, wondering if you’re some kind of super woman to have kept this place safe.

You snort and shrug. “It’s remote.” You remind her. “Not a lot of people come this way. Winter is too harsh. And when I’m not being surprised, I’m a damn good shot.” You glance towards Joel and then look back at his daughter. “I’m just living the way my ancestors did, I guess.”

Joel hums before he takes a bite of the stew, groaning at the taste after not eating for a few days. “Fuck this is good.” He says and Ellie nudges him, “manners, old man.” She says playfully and he rolls his eyes. 

“So where are you heading?” You ask and Joel swallows, reluctant to tell you his plans. 

“We are heading west. Trying to find my brother.” He says vaguely.

A gust of wind pushes against the cabin and you look outside. The sun is fading fast. “I understand.” You tell him, knowing that most are reluctant to reveal information. “But you will be stuck here for a few days at least. The storm is going to be bad.” Walking over to the coat rack, you pick up a heavy sheepskin coat. “I have to latch the shutters and bring in more wood.” You tell them. “Eat.”

Joel is cautious but doesn’t react as you head off to secure the cabin. “You can relax. She doesn’t seem like the type to stab you in your sleep.” Ellie says and Joel tuts, turning to face her. 

“You should never trust anyone. Especially someone you underestimate.” He tells her, knowing he learned his lesson about that.

Outside, you scold yourself. “Fucking idiot, they could lock you out.” You huff, realizing your mistake as soon as the door closed behind you. “Then you’ll freeze to death.” You can’t go back inside and demand they come with you, and the temperature is falling faster than the snow. Making you shiver as you hustle around the cabin, snapping the shutters closed and latching them together to protect the windows and insulate the cabin more.

Joel doesn’t say anything until the door opens and his hand grips his rifle, ready for anything to happen. When you enter alone, shivering, he relaxes and lets go of his weapon. You set the logs down and he releases the tension from his body. You notice and he sighs, “I’m not - it’s not you.” He says, wanting you to know it’s not that he thinks you’re bad, he’s just developed habits.

“I should probably get another few armfuls.” You tell him. “The wind is starting to pick up and I’d rather not have to use the guide rope.”

“I can help.” He offers, standing up from the table. You hesitate for a second before you nod and he follows you outside to where you store the logs. “You prepped all this by yourself?” He asks, impressed even if he doesn’t say it explicitly.

“It’s not easy.” You admit. “I try to chop wood all year. Every day to make sure that there is enough. And during the summer, I try not to burn much, just for cooking.” You start to stack wood up in your arms. “Worth it when I’m warm in my cabin.“

Joel reaches out to take the wood from you, knowing he’s vulnerable without his hands free but also wants to show you that he can help. “You are very capable.” He offers you an awkward compliment just before he clears his throat. 

“Thanks.” You murmur back, eying him warily until you’re back in the cabin. You lock the door but don’t bar it in case you need an escape. “So…bath time?” You ask Ellie who nods eagerly. 

“Have you had others come through here recently?” Joel asks once you’re heating up water.

“Not for a long time.” Your eyes slide away, looking towards the wall where you have pictures of your family hanging up to remember their faces. “Last time was about five years ago.”

“You’ve been on your own this entire time? How the fuck haven’t you gone crazy?” Ellie asks with wide eyes. “All alone? Jesus, I think I’d lose my mind.” She says and Joel doesn’t comment, knowing that he’d probably enjoy the solitude if he didn’t have Ellie.

“I had family up until two years ago.” You explain. “So I haven’t been alone that entire time; but work keeps me busy. And there’s always plenty of it.” You set a bucket into the sink and start to pump the water handle.

“Two years.” He murmurs, surprised that you’ve been able to be alone for so long but he knows Bill was alone for a long time until Frank came along. Survival is more important than company. He watches you pump the water and he works on building up the fire.

There’s something about having people around that makes you happy. Humming a Christmas carol to yourself as you move the bucket onto the stove and open the burner to let it boil. “I should make some hot chocolate on Christmas Eve.” You hum to yourself. There’s still some left that had been dry sealed and you only make a cup on special occasions. Perhaps it would be something that the girl has never had before.

“Fuck yes. I’ve never had hot chocolate.” Ellie confesses and Joel raises his eyebrows at her in warning. Ellie watches you with curiosity. You seem like a glimpse into what the world was like before the outbreak and she loves it as you hum something she’s never heard before. 

“I haven’t heard that song in…well, since before.” Joel confesses, amazed that you observe a holiday that is no longer relevant when it comes to this new world.

“Christmas was our favorite holiday as a family.” You admit. “I’ve got this crazy idea that if I continue to celebrate, then they aren’t really gone. You know?” You shrug, knowing how insane it sounds, but maybe you are a little crazy.

Joel doesn't understand that kind of mentality. For him, he tries to forget about those times. For a second, he glances at the tree you had brought in and remembers decorating one with Sarah year after year. How she'd tell him off for putting too many of the same baubles in the same area. Bossy like her mother. He shakes his head slightly to clear the memories and focuses back on you. "And you've never had anyone stay with you that wasn't family?" Joel asks, curious if you had someone at some point. You are beautiful, even he can see that, and he's certain that most men would've killed for a chance to stay here with you.

You smile wistfully and shake your head. “Never really had that opportunity.” You know what he’s really asking and you shrug before you get another pot of water to temper to boiling in the bath. “The few that have come have been groups. Passing through or seeking shelter for a time. No one stayed.”

Joel nods, surprised that no one has taken advantage of you. The world is harsh and you’re lucky to have gotten away with your life so far. “Do you have a razor? I need to shave.” Joel says, reaching up to scratch the heavy beard he’s grown during the travels in the wilderness.

“I’ve got a razor.” You motion for him to follow you to the bedroom that you had taken for yourself two years ago, because it has a fireplace. “My father was about your size.” You tell him. “The closet dresser still has his things, he’d want them to be out to good use.” You reach for the shaving cup and straight razor he had used your entire life, preferring it over the ones with cartridges.

Joel nods his appreciation, glad that you have some spare clothes. The ones he is wearing are practically threadbare now with holes in them. He walks back into the living room and looks over at Ellie, “go have your bath. I’m going to check the perimeter before it starts to storm.” Joel says, grabbing his gun and he trusts you with Ellie for some reason.

“Soooooo.” Ellie looks around and then back at you. “You don’t mind that we are here, right? Joel really needs to rest and maybe he can get some during the storm.” 

You tilt your head curiously. “Do you always call your dad by his name?” You ask, wondering if the outbreak had changed those customs.

Ellie shakes her head and laughs. “My dad? He’s not my dad.” She declares and your eyes widen, suddenly tense. “And it’s not like that either. He saved me and I- I guess you could say he unofficially adopted me and now he’s stuck with me.” She explains and giggles, “he’s a miserable bastard but he has a good heart. You can trust him. He won’t hurt you.” She promises, “unless you give him a reason to.”

You relax slightly and nod. “I think you two are more of a threat to me at this point.” You point out. “But why don’t we just enjoy the fact that we are cozy and warm.” You click your tongue. “I think I have some clothes that might fit you too. From when I was younger.”

Ellie nods, “gee. This is - you’re like the best place we could’ve found.” She says and stands up. “Thanks for all of this.” Ellie tells you and you smile, “it’s nice to have the company.” She disappears down the hall. Joel comes back an hour later, surveying the area and checking the cabin for any weak points in case the storm gets bad. He doesn’t want to get ambushed during the storm. Old habits die hard.

“You have to be cold.” You huff, closing the door behind him and locking a thick piece of wood into hooks sunk into the walls of the cabin. It keeps the door secure against bear and man, even the wind won’t rattle it. “Go stand by the fire, get warm.”

Joel shakes slightly as he shuffles over to the fire, rubbing his hands to warm them over the flames. "Where's Ellie?" He asks and you tell him she's having a bath. He envies her a little as he shivers but the kid will be happy to be clean. "The perimeter is clear. Checked to make sure we have enough clearance in case someone decides to sneak up." He tells you, having learned some things from Bill.

You decide to not mention they are the first in years to come here, instead you decide to pour Joel a cup of hot chamomile tea you had decided would be the perfect ending to an adventurous day. “I have a bit of whiskey or brandy left if you’d like it?” You offer, having pulled a few bottles up from your father’s collection in the cellar.

Joel nods, "that sounds good." He doesn't remember the last time he had whiskey...maybe the night before he left Boston with Tess and Ellie. Yes, that was the last time. When you set the bottle down on the table with a glass, he pours himself a small measure, not wanting to lose his senses when he's in a strange place. "You having one?" He asks, looking up at you.

You take that as suspicion on his part and shrug, reaching for the bottle. “Sure.” You pour a larger drink and then tip the bottle back to take a shot straight from the neck. “It’s not poisoned.”

Joel snorts softly, "I was askin' if you wanted one. Didn't think you'd poison me like a goddamn black widow." He smirks and shakes his head before he downs the shot of whiskey.

You chuckle dryly. “Hard to be a black widow when you’re me.” You tell him, sitting down and staring at your tea cup. “Sheltered. That would be the word, I guess.”

Joel can tell you've been sheltered, not as jaded by life like he has been. "So does that mean you've never...?" He trails off, not wanting to fully ask before he remembers himself. "Sorry. That was over the line."

“Honestly? It’s kind of nice to be asked questions.” You admit, not exactly being embarrassed by your life, or lack thereof. “Didn’t exactly attract a lot of boys when I was younger.” You tell him. “Guess I was kind of the Ugly Duckling. It’s sheer fucking luck I was home visiting for the weekend from college when the world turned to shit.” You shiver slightly, not even wanting to imagine how bad it would be if you had been in the city. “And I was surrounded by family. So….no, I’ve never had sex.”

Joel nods, surprised and not surprised at your answer. It’s obvious you’ve been alone but you’re a beautiful woman who should’ve been worshiped by now. “That’s a real shame. I bet you look gorgeous when you orgasm.” Joel says bluntly, not one for mincing his words.

Your eyes widen and you look towards the closed bathroom door where Ellie is still soaking in her hot bath. “I-“ the man in front of you is handsome, rough and rugged like the men you had grown up around. He’s obviously capable and he must have a tender side if he’s caring for a young girl who isn’t related to him. You’re literally a forty year old virgin, and who knows when you’d ever have another opportunity? “Do you want to sleep with me?” You ask just as bluntly.

Joel raises his eyebrows in surprise at your bluntness and he glances behind you to the door where Ellie is. “Tonight. After she’s asleep.” He says, cock twitching at the thought of touching you, of taking your innocence. He knows it’s wrong. You should have a dinner date with flowers and chocolates and all that shit but fuck, he wants to see you fall apart. It’s been so long since he lost himself like that, not since Tess, and he needs to let go for just one night.

Swallowing harshly, you nod. “After she gets out, you can clean up too.” You would prefer to have your first time to be a good experience. “Then I’ll clean up as well.”

Joel nods, remaining silent as he thinks about touching you, making you moan. He doesn’t know you but he knows he wants to make you cry out in pleasure. He wants to lose himself in the act of sex. His mind has been so focused on survival, he wants to forget for a while.

Soon enough, your drinks are finished and you have cleaned up the kitchen from their meal. You had eaten while Joel was gone and you add some more wood to the fire. The light from the flames fills the space and the stove keeps the bedrooms warm on the other side of that wall. It might be a bit much to keep both going, but the temperature is falling fast and you want to keep the house warm since you have guests. “I should start warming more water.”

Joel can tell you are nervous and he works on getting cleaned up after Ellie is done and you heat up the water again. He groans as he sits in the bath, itching his beard and he sees the scissors and razor on the side. He looks down at his crotch and figures that could use a trim up too since this is your first time. He wants to make a good impression.

While Joel is in the bath, you settle Ellie down into the other bedroom. “Joel will want to sleep on the couch.” She tells you, flopping down on the bed with a sigh. “So I’ll just sleep here.” You chuckle quietly, knowing that he would probably be in your bed. “He’ll have plenty of choices on where to rest.” You promise and grin. “Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. Since there’s snow, we’ll make some candy, how does that sound? To go with the hot chocolate?”

“Hell to the fuck yes.” Ellie nods rapidly, unable to believe she’s wearing pajamas for the first time in…well, ever. “This place is fucking awesome.” She grins before she yawns, “thanks for letting us stay.”

“Despite what others might do, I think it would have been inhuman to let you stay outside.” You shake your head. “Besides, it will be nice to have company for Christmas.”

Ellie smiles, appreciative and glad you’re so kind. A rare bird in this world she’s grown up in. “Thanks. Joel will be nice to you.” She promises, “and if he isn’t, I’ll make him be.” She smirks and settles into the bed.

You grin and shake your head. “The sheets are fresh and the room stays warm from the stove.” You promise. “Good night, Ellie” She had told you her name while Joel was gone and the girl bids you goodnight as you close her bedroom door.

Joel stands up and dries himself with the towel, deciding to not bother dressing as he keeps it wrapped around his waist while he trims his beard and shaves it back into the mustache of his younger years. When he's clean and ready, he exits the bathroom and enters what he assumes is your bedroom. He finds you standing there, adjusting the pillows, and he offers you a rare smile. "All clean." He says to announce his presence.

“Oh, uh, I better clean up too.” You bite your lip. “Do you- um, I don’t know, do you want me to shave? Bare? I mean I keep my-uh, hair tidy, but what’s the preference for cunt hair after the apocalypse?” You ramble nervously.

Joel snorts, "baby, it's your choice. I don't mind exploring a jungle or you can shave. I ain't fussy. It's the end of the world." He chuckles and shifts to sit down on the end of the bed.

You laugh quietly, shaking your head at your nerves. “Okay, I’ll- I’ll be quick,” you promise, rushing over to your underwear drawer and pulling out a lingerie set that never saw any use since you bought it the week before the world ended.

Joel finds your nerves endearing and he watches you rush around your room until you disappear down the hall to the bathroom. The fire is roaring and Joel takes a moment to imagine that the world didn’t end. That he met you in a bar and you decided to take him home.

In the bathroom, there’s still a bucket of warm water and you make sure you scrub every inch of your body, sure that he’s not fussed but you want to pretend like this happened organically. He’s attractive and someone you would have crushed on in college, even if he is a little older looking than you.

Joel licks his lips, his stomach twisting as he thinks about how strange life can be. One minute he’s out freezing in the wilderness and not sure if he’s gonna survive. The next, he’s preparing to take a woman’s innocence in her cabin that’s like a haven in the middle of nowhere. When the door opens again, he takes a second to inhale deeply before he looks at you. That breath is knocked from him when he sees you standing there dolled up in silk and lace. “I- wow. You look - wow.” He chokes pathetically, his cock twitching under the towel.

“I know it’s stupid.” You feel foolish for putting on the trappings of another time, another social expectation. “But I- I wanted to feel like this is normal. We are normal.” You step forward and devour the sight of him on your bed. “I’m not expecting words or emotions. I just wanted to pretend this was not desperation on both of our parts.”

Joel shakes his head, “it’s not desperation. It’s a connection. The need to feel something other than desire to survive. I want you. Thought you were gorgeous from the moment I saw you. Let me make you feel good. You’ve been alone for so long, you gotta be touch starved. Tell me what you need, sweetheart.” He says, standing up to walk towards you but stopping before he touches you.

You lick your lips, feeling wet because of his words. “Drop your towel.” You order softly. You’ve seen a naked man before, but you want to see this one, the one who will finally touch you like you’ve dreamed of. “I don’t know what I need, but I want you to touch me. Make me think of nothing but you.”

Joel doesn’t deny you. You deserve more than what he can give you but he can at least offer you his body. He drops the towel, his cock half hard as he stands before you and his dark eyes drop to your lips. “Can I kiss you?” He asks gently.

“Yes.” You whisper, eyes trailing up and down his body. He's not exactly hard, but he’s also not soft. Weathered, and experienced would be the words you would use to describe how he looks. Reaching out, you brush your fingers over his hot skin, resisting the urge to moan.

Joel closes his eyes briefly as you touch him with soft hands. He shuffles closer and reaches out to cup your cheek, leaning forward until he’s pressing his lips against yours. “Fuck.” He murmurs when you whimper into his mouth and he deepens the kiss, tilting your head so he can taste more of you.

This man, the same one who had threatened your life and tied you to a chair, completely consumes you. Taking control of the kiss and making you forget your hands are even on his chest as his tongue sweeps into your mouth and makes you moan.

He cups your other cheek, pressing close until his body is completely against yours. His tongue sliding against yours and you’re a little clumsy but so is he. It’s been a while since he kissed someone like this. His hands slide down from your cheeks until he is caressing your back and finally, his hands squeeze your ass.

Your eyes open and you hum into his mouth when his hands find your ass. Unable to believe that the simple squeeze feels so good. “Fuck.” You gasp when he pulls back to breathe.

You’re so reactionary already and that makes Joel harden, imagining the noises he can get out of you when he’s inside of you. He groans softly and kisses down your throat while you catch your breath, his hands kneading your flesh.

“Can I- can I touch you?” You ask, emboldened by his groan of permission. Your hands map hot skin, scars and you feel him shiver as they drift lower. Groaning yourself when your fingers wrap around his hard cock.

Joel’s breath hitches. It’s been so long since someone has touched him, since he allowed his mind to relax. “Baby.” He murmurs, his hands sliding up your back to the clasp of your bra. He undoes it and you let go of his cock so he can drag it off of your body. “Shit. Look at you.” He murmurs, tossing the bra down so he can cup your tits.

There’s something that is so raw about someone else’s hands on your body. The feeling is so different from your own. He throb when you squeeze him and it’s amazing how the book descriptions have it right. Velvet over steel. His cocks skin is so soft and warm, the hardness underneath such a contrast. “Can I-“ you pull away and start to sink down to your knees. “I want to-”

Joel swallows, his stomach twisting. “You don’t have to. This should be about you.” He says, “this is about making you feel good.” He shakes his head, “you don’t - this is - you don’t have to.” He repeats, not wanting to be selfish.

“I want to.” You confess, your cheeks hot with both desire and embarrassment. “If this is the only chance I have, I want to do it all.” You tell him, looking up and wrapping your fingers around his cock again.

Joel nods, unable to deny you when you ask him like that. He wants this to be all about you and even if what you want is to suck his cock. You kneel down before him and he swallows harshly as you look up at him with wide and innocent eyes.

He doesn’t rush you and you’re thankful for that. Obviously circumcised, the head of his cock is beautifully flushed and beading a clear liquid. “Tell me if I do it wrong.” You order before you lean forward and press the tip of your tongue to the slit.

Joel hisses, watching you as you close your eyes and take the head into your mouth. It’s more than he can take but he inhales deeply and calms down so he doesn’t ruin this for you. “Fuck baby.” He murmurs, opening his eyes to watch you.

You think that you’re doing it right from the way that Joel’s voice drops, hitting you in the pit of your stomach and you swear your cunt is dripping onto the floor. You hum, enjoying the clean taste and surprising saltiness of the pre-cum. Squeezing the base and keeping yourself from going too far and gagging.

Joel caresses your head, allowing you to take your time as you explore him. Your innocence is obvious but he likes it. You are doing this for yourself and he likes that you aren’t acting. Some girls used to make a show about sucking his cock and then complain they didn’t want to do it.

You appreciate that he will let you take your time. Slowly feeling what he likes, what makes him groan. You hollow your cheeks and push him a little deeper, until you feel your throat close and your eyes water as you look up at him.

“Jesus.” Joel hisses as you take him deeper. A tear slides down your cheek and he quickly wipes it away. “Baby. Don’t push yourself. Take your time. Feels so good.” He murmurs, wanting you to know that he’s enjoying this.

Your lips stretch around his cock in a smile and you swallow around him, enjoying the way he moans when you do. This is something that you had thought would just be for the experience, but you love it. Especially when his knees buckle slightly and his hand on your head flexes in pleasure.

“Baby. Let me - you need to- shit. I need - stop.” He chokes, not wanting to cum. It’s been way too long since he jerked off, unable to sneak off and leave Ellie alone even while she slept. He doesn’t want this to be over before he even gets to be inside of you.

“Are you sure?” You pout slightly, wiping your chin and looking up at him. You’re out of breath, your cunt aching and all you want is to see this man cum.

Joel nods, dragging you up and he surges down to meet you to press his lips to yours. Turning you, he walks you back towards the bed. He presses you down onto it, his lips trailing along your jaw as he straddles you.

You gasp and are taken by the dominance in the motion. This is a man who can be so damn sure of himself and capable. Your hands slide over his chest and around his sides to stroke his back as he nuzzles and kisses your pulse. “Joel.” You moan softly, as if he were an old lover.

He twitches at your moan, loving how his name sounds coming from your lips. He wants to hear more of it. He continues kissing down your body, his tongue sliding along your collarbone before he ducks down to take your nipple in his mouth after he cups your tit and tilts it up for him.

You had never imagined it would feel so good, your thighs pressing against his hips when he’s between them. Keeping you open as he circles your nipple with his tongue and scraps his teeth over it.

Joel takes his time, sucking and biting your nipple until it's puffy from his manipulations. He groans and switches to the other breast, his calloused hands squeezing both as he slowly grinds against you.

His cock is throbbing against your thigh, leaking and hot. Making. You whimper with pleasure as you imagine him inside you. There’s no fear, no hesitation. Not when he could be rough and quick and he’s taking the time to make you feel so good. “Joel.”

He groans as he releases your nipple, kissing down your sternum and he flicks his tongue into your belly button as he lays between your thighs. His dark eyes meet yours as he pushes them back to get a good look at your cunt. “Jesus. Such a pretty pussy.” He murmurs, his fingers sliding through your folds until he spreads them with his thumbs. Leaning in, his eyes focus on you as he flicks his tongue over your clit.

You gasp out a sound, half inhuman as you experience his tongue against your sex. Hot and wet, he’s not timid as he tastes you. This is a man who doesn’t mind getting dirty and diving into things, just like he’s proving with your cunt. Eyes wide, they are fixed on the man between your legs.

Joel groans as he laps at your cunt until he is pushing his tongue into you. Curling it and pushing your legs back so he can get deeper. Fuck, you taste amazing and he groans as you moan softly. He wants to make this good for you so he focuses on your clit, his hand sliding along your thigh until he's pushing a finger into you.

“Oh god.” You whine, your walls clenching down around his finger. “You- your fingers are thicker than mine.” Just one finger is stretching you out like you aren’t used to, or maybe it’s just because it’s not your finger but someone else’s. He presses deeper and you hiss in pleasure when he finds a spot deep inside you.

Joel loves the way you whine, glad he’s not hurting you, and he pumps his finger a few times before he adds another, wanting to stretch you out to take his cock. He’s girthy and he doesn’t want to hurt you in any way.

“Oh fuck.” You moan quietly. “Where have you been for the past twenty years?” You could have used him in your bed, to be your companion in this decidedly lonely life. “Fuck baby.”

“Survivin’” He answers honestly against your clit as he curls his fingers, scissoring them to stretch you out, and he loves the way you gush around his digits, getting closer to your orgasm. He wants you to cum like this for him.

“Yeah.” You nod and understand what he means. Closing your eyes and letting him push you towards an orgasm. The first one that you’ve ever experienced from someone else. “Joel.” You gasp, your thighs pressing against his broad shoulders and your hips push down. “Gonna- fuck, gonna cum!”

Joel grunts, loving the way you squirm beneath him and rock onto his fingers. He keeps the same pace until you are squealing, soaking his fingers with your orgasm and he’s so proud. He is glad you came so hard and he can tell you enjoyed it.

Your thighs are trembling and you’re breathing as hard as you did the night you had chopped down one of the big trees to let it cure. “Oh my god. Oh my god.” You can’t help but giggle a little, looking down at the man who is staring up at you with his chin on your inner hip. “That was….i have no words.”

Joel is pleased that you enjoyed it. He leans in to press his lips to your skin, kissing along your hip. You deserve some tenderness and he is happy to give it to you. He shifts to kiss up your body until he’s hovering above you. “You still want me inside of you?” He asks, wanting to make sure you still want him.

“All I want for Christmas is you.” You manage to tease breathlessly, reaching up and caressing his cheek. “Just- be gentle?” You ask, suddenly nervous about the thick cock that is throbbing against your belly. He feels like he could just cum against your skin right now if he rocked his hips a few times.

He chuckles softly, leaning in to kiss along your jaw. “You tell me if anything hurts and if you don’t like it.” He demands quietly, his dark eyes meeting yours and he caresses your thigh, lifting it up on his hip so he can reach down to grip his cock. “You ready?”

“Been waiting all my life, Joel.” You roll your hips down and moan when you feel his cock pressing against your cunt. “Better make it worth the wait.” It feels good to tease, to make it lighthearted. You know he won’t stay, so there’s no entanglements here.

He likes that you don’t want him to offer you sweet words and endearments when this isn’t that kind of experience. He wants it to be good for you. He positions himself at your entrance and slowly, so slowly, starts to push into you.

The feeling is so foreign, so overwhelming that your mouth drops open on a low moan. Fingers curling around his shoulders, nails biting into his skin lightly as your entire body quivers. “Fuuuuuuck.” You whine, hating that it’s taken so long to experience this.

Joel keeps his eyes focused on you, on your reactions. He doesn’t want to hurt you in any way. You shake beneath him and he slowly rocks into you, opening you up inch by inch on his cock. “You okay?” He rasps, trying to control himself. It’s been too long since he was inside of a woman and you’re unbelievably tight.

“Fucking amazing….” You moan, caressing his back and staring up at him in wonder. “It’s so, I’m so full.” You whimper, “move baby, I want to feel more.”

Joel isn’t even all the way in yet and you’re looking at him like he hung the moon. He pushes the final inch inside and your nails bite into his back. “Tell me if anything hurts.” He demands before he slowly starts to pull back, his eyes fixed on your face as he pulls out until only the tip remains before he’s pushing back into you.

“Jooooooelllllll.” You practically wail his name when his hips snap forward and he slides into you to the hilt with a delicious pressure that has your thighs tightening. “Oh god, it’s so- so good.”

Your reactions have him gritting his teeth to control himself. You’re so lost in the sensation and your cunt is gripping him, wet and hot. “That’s it baby. That’s it. Good girl.” He murmurs, caressing your side.

“Is it- does it feel good for you?” You want to know that he’s enjoying it too. This isn’t just about you. “Does it- oh god,” your eyes roll back when he thrusts into you again. “Fuck.”

“So good.” Joel promises gruffly, “you’re so - Jesus. I haven’t felt like this in so long.” He admits, knowing that while Tess was good, she didn’t make him want to blow his load within seconds of being inside of her. There was no emotional weight, just raw physical need. This is heavier and he feels it in the way he thrusts into you, wanting you to enjoy every second of this.

You moan softly, stroking his back and reaching up to run your fingers through his hair. “Fuck, I would be addicted to you.” You confess, your walls clenching down around him tight.

Hearing you say what he was thinking has him thrusting a little harder. He leans down to kiss you, sliding his tongue into your mouth to swallow your moan, wanting to absorb everything you give him.

It helps, his kiss. Your moans are getting loud and you don’t want to wake Ellie, even if you’re sure she’s dead to the world. Wanting to keep this moment for just you and Joel as he rocks into you again and again.

He wants you to cum more than once on his cock tonight. He slides his hand between you to find your clit, rubbing it as he pushes into you.

“Oh god. Oh fuck, Joel.” Your eyes widen when he starts to rub your clit. Immediately clenching down around him again. He is amazing.

Joel needs you to cum for him. He wants to hear it, feel it, see it. He rubs your clit a little faster and adjusts his hips, wanting you to cum for him.

“Ohhhhh, oh god!” You cry out, throwing your head back and moaning when you start to cum. Body shaking under Joel’s in pleasure.

Joel groans as he feels you start to cum. Pressing his lips to yours to smother your cries in case you wake Ellie, he works you through it. Continuing to rub your clit and make you shake beneath him.

You pant against his lips, grabbing his hand when it becomes too much and drag it up to your breast. Wanting him to feel all of you, to leave not part of you untouched.

He squeezes your tit, his lips pressing against your jaw and he takes a moment to slow down, let you ride your orgasm. He wants another one from you before he pulls out to cum. He groans, “you’re so fucking beautiful. Beautiful and just - shit. So good.” He praises you, unused to being a man of many words but you deserve this considering how long you’ve waited for this moment.

Now that you have cum, you pull your legs back, wrapping them around his waist. “Let me- let me ride you.” You beg, wanting to feel what it’s like to sit on a cock and ride it. “Please, can I- I just want to feel it.”

Joel swallows, wanting to give you whatever you desire tonight. You deserve it. All of it. He nods and pulls out of you, shifting to lay down against your pillows. “Take what you want, baby.”

Biting your lip, you throw your leg over his hip and straddle him. “It looks bigger like this.” You admit, smirking slightly as you wrap your hand around him. “It’s supposed to feel bigger too, right? Feel deeper?

Joel nods, “yeah. Yeah it is. So I’ve heard.” He says, his hands sliding up to caress your waist until he’s cupping your tits. He squeezes them, pinching your nipples as you pump his cock.

“Oh fuck.” You moan, rolling your head back as he toys with your tits. “I want to feel you.” You murmur, lifting your hips and positioning him at your entrance before you slowly start lowering onto his cock.

Joel’s eyes flick down to where his cock is disappearing inside of you and he groans at the sight. “Baby, fuck.” He hisses and his eyes meet yours when your mouth falls open at the way he stretches you out.

There’s something intoxicating and empowering about being on top. About the man under you taking what you want and letting you have control. You have no doubt he could overpower you, force you to submit to him, but he squeezes your hip and your breast in encouragement.

He watches you as you take what you want, what you need. It's an honor to watch you discover what you like as you start to move on top of him. He swallows harshly, knowing that he will need to tell you he needs to pull out but right now, he's happy to watch you and be still beneath you while you use his body.

He does feel bigger from this position. Making your eyes roll back when you are settled on him fully. “Fuck, it’s like you’re in my stomach.” You whine, loving the sensation. “I love this. Fuck, does it feel good for you?” You ask as you roll your hips slowly.

Joel inhales deeply, trying to control himself as your walls flutter around his cock. You feel like a goddamn vice, squeezing him, and you haven’t even cum in this position. “It’s - Christ, it’s fucking incredible.” He promises, his hands squeezing your hips before they slide around to squeeze your ass.

You moan in pleasure and start to roll your hips faster. Feeling incredible every time you sit back down on his cock and moan out his name softly.

“That’s it, baby. Take what you need.” He murmurs, watching you take your pleasure and his cock twitches inside of you. “You feel so good. So fucking good.” He rasps, his brow furrowed as he concentrates on you.

You feel powerful, invincible as you ride him. Bracing your hands on his chest as you bounce on his cock, the bed creaking and swaying under you. “Fuck, baby.” You whimper, throwing your head back. “This is amazing, you’re amazing.”

Joel groans as you bounce a little faster. “You’re - shit - I need you to cum for me.” His hand slides down to rub your clit. “Cum for me baby.” He orders, surging up to wrap his lips around your nipple.

His arm is trapped between you, fingers furiously rubbing your clit while his mouth deliciously assaults your nipple. Making you cry out again when that knot of pressure explodes and the hot rush of your orgasm washes through you. “Joel!”

He works you through it, your hips stuttering from their previous rhythm and he loves the way you cry out into his ear, soaking his cock with your orgasm. “Baby. I need- I gotta pull out.” He chokes against your breast as he withdraws his fingers from your clit.

“Okay, fuck- let me-“ you don’t want to pull off his cock, but you have to. Obviously there’s no birth control and you’ve never been on it. Sliding your hips back, you watch as Joel quickly takes his cock in his hand and gives hard, quick tugs to the stiff length.

He grunts, eyes fixed on you as he works himself to his orgasm. It only takes a half dozen thrusts until he is pulsing in his grip and spurts of hot seed hit his skin, some hitting yours and a low groan escaping his lips as the pleasure overtakes his system.

Leaning forward, you press your lips to his after watching the first ropes of cum splatter over his stomach. Moaning into his mouth as he pants into yours while he works himself through it, finding it the hottest thing you’ve ever seen in your life.

“Fuck.” He pants into your mouth, squeezing his cock as he milks himself dry and he slides his tongue against yours, slowly pumping himself until he works himself until it becomes too much. His free hand comes up to cup your cheek.

Catching your breath with the kiss, you smile when you can finally giggle. Feeling like you are flying from the endorphins and the pleasurable ache between your thighs. “Merry fucking Christmas.” You whisper. “Holy shit, thank you for that.”

Joel chuckles softly, kissing your chin when you lean back. “My pleasure, sweetheart. Jesus, I don’t think - yeah, I haven’t had sex like that since I was in my early twenties.” He confesses, “did you enjoy it?” He asks, wanting to make sure it was everything you wanted and more.

You flip your leg over his and collapse against his side. “I fucking loved it.” His cock is softening and it’s strange to see it lying against his stomach, cum pooling under the flaccid flesh. “Can I taste it?” You ask softly, wondering if he will think you are strange.

He nods, a little speechless. Most women never want to go near cum, let alone taste it without it being direct from the source. Tess wasn’t one to swallow, she always spat it out. You look entranced and that makes his cock twitch in interest.

You were going to swipe your fingers through the sticky mess on his stomach, but you decide against it. Instead, you lower your head and take the cum covered head of his cock into your mouth to clean it off with your tongue.

“Jesus Christ.” Joel hisses, overstimulated but fuck, you are gorgeous. He thinks you’re incredible. “Fuck, sweetheart.” He pants when you give him mercy and release his cock from your mouth. “What do you think?” He asks you breathlessly.

“I think that I want this again.” You look up and shoot him again. “When you can, of course.”

Joel chuckles, caressing your back. “Might be a while. I ain’t young. I ain’t - it takes a while.” He says with a blush, “and I want this to be perfect for you.” He says softly.

“It already is.” You promise with a smirk and roll over to grab your panties off the floor to wipe the rest of the cum off his stomach. “Right now, I want to sleep, if you want to stay?” You ask, not sure where he would want to sleep beside you just because he fucked you.

“I want to.” He promises you. Joel should go sleep on the couch but he doesn’t want to. He wants to curl around you and fall asleep. He reaches for you, pulling you close as you grab the duvet to pull it over you both.

The room is warm from the fireplace and the sex, making you sigh softly as you settle into his embrace. “Goodnight Joel.” You murmur quietly. “I hope you sleep well.”

Joel knows he will. He feels safe and secure for the first time in God knows how long. He wants to curl around you, breathe you in, and go to sleep. He kisses your forehead, “goodnight.” He murmurs and closes his eyes, pleased to be safe and sound. 

**** 

The storm wakes him up, the wind blustering past the window and he blinks a few times to remember where he is. His cock is hard again, morning wood from you curled around his body, and he remembers every detail about last night. God, you gave him all of you. You didn’t hold back and he’s honored that you let him touch you. He wants to touch you again. His hand caresses your back, gently shifting you onto your back, and he snakes down between your thighs. Spreading them, he groans at the sight of your pussy under the sheets and he leans in to slide his tongue through your folds.

You don’t want to wake up, warm and comfortable with the weight of someone beside you, but the most pleasure feeling from between your legs rips you out of your dreams. Waking up and gasping out Joel’s name when you realize he’s got his tongue pressed against your clit under the sheets, feasting on you while you slept. “Oh god.”

He loves the way your voice is rough with sleep as he wakes you with his tongue. Sliding it into you and his nose presses against your clit while his fingers push your thighs back so he can get even deeper

“Oh my god.” You moan again, eyes rolling back and your fingers twisting into the sheets. “Merry Christmas Eve to me.” You pant out jokingly. “I’ve gotten my present.”

He chuckles against your flesh, pulling back to flick his tongue over your clit until he sucks it back into his mouth. “Merry Christmas Eve.” He murmurs softly, his hand trailing along your thigh until he can push two fingers into you.

The room is still fairly dark, from the shutters and the storm outside, the room is slightly chilly so you know the fire has burned low, but you are in a magical place. Reaching under and running your fingers through his hair. “Joel, you’re so good to me.”

He curls his fingers, sucking your clit into his mouth and he desperately needs you to cum for him again. To hear it, to feel it. He’s addicted to you and he wants to make you feel amazing while you give him and Ellie shelter during the storm.

Your breathing comes in waves, the pleasure sometimes making you forget how as he presses against a spot inside you that makes your toes curl. “Joel.” You gasp out. “I- oh shit!” You squeal when the pleasure rockets through you and catches you by surprise. Soaking his fingers with your release.

He’s surprised by the way you soak his fingers and chin. Loving it honestly. He groans and works you through it, cock hard as he grinds into the sheets and moans your name as he pulls back to gently kiss your clit.

“Oh my god.” You whine. “Please tell me you are hard?” You ask, panting as you catch your breath. “Please, please be hard. I want you inside me again.

He grunts, “I’m hard. Have been since I woke up. Feel like a damn teenager.” He says, kissing up your body until he is pressing his lips to yours. His hard cock pressed against your thigh. “How do you want me, baby?” He asks softly, wanting you to continue to be in control.

“Just like this?” You know that it’s not emotional, but you can’t help but wrap your legs around his waist as your hands slide up his arms to curl around the back of his neck. “Slow? We have all day until Ellie wants food.” You joke. “It’s still early yet. She’s snoring.”

Joel nods, knowing the emotions between you are only because of your physical connection, of what you’ve given him. He swallows harshly and leans in to softly kiss you as he reaches between you to position his cock at your entrance, slowly pushing in.

You moan softly. Loving how gentle he is. You know that he’s tough, he could have hurt you, but he’s gone out of his way to make this amazing for you. “Joel.” You whimper into his mouth.

Your walls grip him and he hisses as your nails scratch down his back. “Sorry.” You mutter and he shakes his head, “no, I liked it.” He promises and pushes all the way in. He pulls back to look into your eyes as he starts to rock his hips, taking in every detail of your pleasured face.

Just like you asked him to, he takes his time. Staring down at you with a tenderness that almost makes you believe that this is real. This is your partner, maybe your husband, making love to you. “So good.” You whine softly. “I could spend the rest of my life right here.”

He knows you’re talking from a place of pleasure and not reality. He has to move on, to take Ellie west and find his brother. He rocks into you, caressing your side until he’s cupping your breast, squeezing it as he leans down to kiss along your neck.

It’s all you could want, this moment right here. You will be remembering it for a long time after this man is gone. You moan softly and tighten your thighs around him as he fucks you. Your walls clenching down around him.

Your walls grip him and he rocks slow and deep, wanting to hear and feel you fall apart beneath him again. “That’s it, baby. Christ, you feel good. So wet and tight around me.” He murmurs, loving the way you gasp when he lowers his pelvis so he can grind against your clit.

Biting your lip, you keep yourself from Asking him to stay. To settle here with you, him and his charge. You’re lonely, you can admit that. But you don’t say anything, just moaning when he works you back up to the edge.

He can tell you’re close. “Cum for me baby.” He demands, grinding lower and he pinches your nipple. “Cum for me. Cum.” He growls, needing you to fall apart for him again.

You shudder and can’t help but fall over the edge. Loving the roughness of the pitch and the desperation in his voice. Tilting your head back, you cry out softly as you shake under him in the most intense orgasm yet.

Joel pants as you cum around him, soaking him, and it’s an orgasm that seems to overtake your every sense. Your eyes close as you cry softly and he wishes he could commit that to memory. “That’s it, sweetheart. Shit. I- I gotta pull out. Got me worked up.” He confesses, reluctantly pulling his cock from inside of you. He reaches down to grip himself, pumping his length as he watches you recover.

“Cum in my mouth.” You immediately pant, reaching for him and pulling on his body as you beg. Wanting to see him cum as he fills your mouth is something you want to memorize.

Joel can’t deny you. He lets go of his cock and he shuffles up your body, straddling your chest. You lean forward to take his cock into your mouth and he groans. “Fuck. I- I’m not gonna last.” He confesses, “do you - fuck.” He chokes, pumping his cock as you suck on the tip.

Your eyes widen when the first rope of cum shoots into your mouth. Much harder than you had expected, it hits the back of your throat and forces you to start swallowing. Loving how his cock is pulsing, throbbing in your mouth as he spills, your hand gripping his hip to keep him close as you try to swallow every drop.

He closes his eyes as you take everything he gives you and he grunts your name, cock twitching inside of your mouth and his hand cups your cheek. “Fuckkkk.” He exhales shakily, one last slow thrust into your mouth until he pulls out of you.

Some of him has spill out of the corners of your mouth, making you lick your lips when he pulls out. “That was amazing.” You sigh, caressing his thigh as he hovers over you. “Thank you for the experience. And the wake up.”

Joel shifts off of you, reaching for you to curl you into his side. He cups your cheek and leans down to press his lips to yours. Not caring about the lingering taste of his cum. He doesn’t care about that. He kisses you firmly until he pulls back to nudge his nose against yours, “thank you for - well, I didn’t expect this when I saw smoke coming from your cabin.”

“I didn’t expect to have people come.” You admit easily, “but I’ve enjoyed having you both here. And while the storm blows, we will be nice and cozy here. And when you decide to leave, I’ll pack you up some supplies.” You offer softly.

Joel nods, unable to say anything else as you curl around him. He relaxes into the pillows, wanting to savor this time where he doesn’t have to fight for survival, to fight for his and Ellie’s lives. He kisses your forehead and closes his eyes, allowing himself to imagine a life spent here with you in safety.

Your eyes pop open when you hear the other bedroom door open. Joel is still asleep beside you and slowly, you ease out of the bed. Dressing quickly, you slip out of the room and out to find Ellie looking around. “Where’s Joel?” She demands, knowing the bar is still on the door and his gun is still here. 

“He’s asleep.” You look back towards the bedroom. “Why don’t we build up the fire and I’ll start breakfast?”

Ellie nods, confused that Joel is still asleep. He never sleeps this much. He must be exhausted from all the late nights. You walk over to the fire and Ellie follows, "so...Joel slept in your room?" She asks teasingly.

“He did.” You aren’t embarrassed, but you don’t offer anything else. You aren’t sure if Joel would want her to know his business. Bending down. You stir the coals to life and quickly add more wood.

Ellie nods, “good. He needs to relax.” She isn’t sure what you guys did but she’s glad Joel isn’t fighting for survival right now. “It’s Christmas Eve!I” She remembers, “we can have hot chocolate, right?” She asks, excited for the holiday she’s never celebrated.

“We can.” You nod and smile at her eagerness. “And tomorrow, you will get some Christmas presents.” It might just be some old clothes you have and some socks that you had knitted, but you would be able to give her something.

Ellie’s eyes widen, “presents?” She asks and you nod. “I- wow.” She surges forward to hug you, “thank you. This is - this is the best fucking place ever.”

“You’re welcome.” You laugh softly and hug her back. “Don’t be too excited, it’s not a Nintendo or one of those gaming systems that were all the rage the last time Christmas was popular, but it’s given in the spirit of making you happy.”

“Nintendo?” Ellie asks and she snaps her fingers. “I used to - me and my friend-” Her eyes get dark with a loss that you know too well. “I- I lost my friend. We used to play arcade games in this abandoned mall until she was-” Ellie trails off.

“I’m sorry.” You tell her quietly. Everyone has lost someone during this time, but it’s obvious that this friend had been dear to Ellie. “Hopefully one day you can find a place to play again, smiling when you think about her.”

Ellie nods, appreciating how you don’t treat her like a little kid and you actually tell her how you think without censoring stuff. She appreciates you treating her like she should be. Joel tries to censor stuff but he can only do so much in this new world. “So…what’s for breakfast?” She asks.

“Well, I still have some eggs from the chickens, so I had thought we would have eggs and wildberry oat cakes.” You grin. “Like pancakes, but I ground up the oats for the flour.”

Ellie grins, “fuck yes.” She makes a fist and you giggle at her enthusiasm for something so simple. “I can help. I’m sure Joel will be up soon.” She offers and you nod. 

Joel groans as he wakes up, his body stiffening as he tries to remember where he is until it hits him. He’s safe. It’s Christmas Eve. He swallows harshly and rubs his forehead as he sits up and reaches for the pajama pants you gave him that belonged to your father.

In the kitchen, the stove is hot, and you’re showing Ellie how you had ground up the oats using an old hand crank coffee grinder. Putting her to work with a grin as she talks to you.

Joel comes into the kitchen, finding you and Ellie cooking. “Something smells good.” He murmurs and walks over to you, he leans in to press a soft kiss to your neck.

Ellie puffs out a laugh and quickly turns her head. “I didn’t see nothin’ man.” She insists before showing Joel the oak cakes she had made, flavored with the dried wild berries you had picked this summer.

Joel appreciates the fact that she doesn’t call him out and he admires the oat cakes with a hum. “You did a good job, kid.” He praises her, suddenly able to let himself feel like the man he was before shit hit the fan. His shoulders aren’t tense, he doesn’t feel like he’s going to die every moment of the day. He ruffles her hair and she growls, making him chuckle.

You see that he’s relaxed and you smile, happy that you can provide that for this duo. To be a safe haven in the literal storm. “I thought that we would eat breakfast and then I will go into the cellar and bring up the small ham.” You offer Joel with a shrug. “I had planned on a small ham steak when it was just me, but it would be nice to have a proper Christmas dinner tomorrow?”

Joel bites his lip, “I don’t want you to waste all your food, sweetheart. You gotta survive the winter and I don’t- we don’t need to eat much. I’m already fuller than I’ve been in months.” He confesses, “don’t waste your resources.” He orders softly, not wanting to be the reason you go without.

“Joel….” You shake your head. “I have plenty of food.” You promise. “Although, I will need to get out to the barn at some point. Check on the animals.”

Joel nods, “I can do that. You stay in the warmth. I can see if there’s anything to hunt as well.” He adds, wanting to do his part. “I- I haven’t celebrated Christmas in many years and I- I do want this one to be special.” He admits and reaches up to cup your cheek.

“It will be special.” You agree, melting slightly at how kind he is being. “We will make sure of it. But you need to eat before going out in the cold.”

Ellie has never seen Joel like this before. He’s gentle. Something she hasn’t really witnessed. She’s seen the worst of Joel. The terrifying moments that he saved her life by doing what needed to be done. She’s never seen him caress someone. She focuses on the oat cakes as she turns away from the intimate moment, wanting to give Joel the time to enjoy this before he hardens up into the survivor he is

Breakfast is finished and it’s strange sitting down with other people, often it’s you and one of the books you are rereading. But it’s festive. You and Joel start talking about old Christmas traditions and Ellie is intrigued by the idea of ugly sweater contests.

Joel chuckles at her reaction, “yeah. Sarah used to make me and my brother Tommy wear the ugliest sweaters she could find.” His chuckles die down after a second, reminded of Sarah, and he frowns at how his heart aches but he’s happy to have the memories. “Another one was, uh, mistletoe.” He says, trying to distract from his reaction.

“Yeah.” You snort and grin. “Mistletoe actually grows wild around here.” You admit. Ellie has a confused look on her face. “If you were with a partner or a friend under the mistletoe, you had to kiss.” You explain with a small shrug.

Ellie smirks, "you should get some mistletoe. You know....so you guys have an excuse to kiss." She giggles and Joel clears his throat, raising his eyebrows at you. It's not the worst idea he has ever heard.

You shake your head, remembering how meddling teenagers can be. “I think that we will make the candy this morning.” You decide, eyeing Ellie. “How does that sound? Have the hot chocolate once Joel is back inside and everything is cozy again?”

Ellie nods enthusiastically, “hell yes.” She is so excited. She hasn’t experienced anything like this before. Joel smiles, pleased that she is happy. He remembers how much Sarah loved Christmas. “I’ll, uh, go get ready and I’ll go check on the animals.”

“Northwest corner, two hundred yards from the front door.” You’re sure that he had seen the barn, but just in case, you tell him. “I’ll bring in some more wood.”

Joel nods, standing up to go get dressed. You left some of your father’s clothes on the chair for him. If he thought it would be strange wearing a dead man’s clothes when the outbreak first happened, he’s immune to it now. Knowing that no one is making new clothes. At least not in the wilderness. He gets dressed and puts on his coat and boots, ready to face the storm for you.

You show Ellie how to clean up and start to bundle up as well. “Don’t stay out there too long.” You beg Joel as he grabs his rifle. “We don’t need meat too bad for you to risk yourself.”

Joel nods, knowing that he’s taken a lot of risks in life. He won’t linger out in the cold. He has to think of Ellie, of getting her where she needs to go. He winces as the storm blows in his face as he makes his way outside.

“I wish he wouldn’t try to hunt.” You murmur to Ellie as you wrap a scarf around your neck. “There’s plenty of food in the cellar.”

Joel squints through the blizzard as he makes his way into the barn, the animals all huddled together and Joel exhales, the cold air puffing as he checks on the animals, refreshes the water and hay, and makes his way back outside to see if he can find a lone deer or something.

With Ellie opening and closing the door for you, you manage to bring in another good few hauls of wood inside. Wanting to make sure that you stay nice and cozy over the next day or so. With Joel checking the animals, they should be set for a couple of days. You had meant to check them before the storm hit, but Joel and Ellie’s unexpected arrival had thrown that off. You had known the animals had plenty of food and water, but now you know they will be set for a few days.

Joel shivers as he picks up the two rabbits he managed to shoot and he makes his way back to your cabin. He knocks on the door and you unlock it. He shakes off the snow from his jacket as he enters the cabin, wiping off his boots and you take the rabbits so he can take them off along with his jacket.

“Go sit by the fire.” You huff, seeing how chapped his cheeks are and you rush over to the stove. You boiled together an herb tea, thinking it would be good for warming up the bones after coming back and you pour him a cup. “It’s herbs, but it’s tasty and hot.” You tell him, handing him the steaming mug. “I have some Vaseline for your cheeks.”

Joel huffs at you fussing over him but he secretly likes it. He rolls his eyes as he rubs his hands over the fire, feeling Ellie watching him with a smirk on her face. “We are gonna make candy today.” She tells him and he nods, trying to remember the last time he had candy.

You stoke the fire and pull out the large black cauldron to boil the sap. “So I have some syrup from my trees that we will boil down into a sticky candy.” You explain as you swing the hook around and set it up. “Then we pour it over clean snow.”

“Jesus. You have it all figured out, don’t cha sweetheart?” Joel says with awe in his voice. He’s never seen someone so capable except Bill. Only Bill never made goddamn candy. “Does it taste good?” He asks you.

“It’s amazing.” You shrug slightly, preening slightly at his praise. “We’ve been doing sugar boils for a long time. If you cook it down, you have sugar for the year.”

Joel hums, impressed at your ingenuity and your survival skills. “Sugar? For a year? Damn. I might never leave.” Ellie jokes and Joel meets your eyes, a hopeful sadness to them that makes his heart clench.

“You would be welcomed back anytime you’re traveling through the area.” You promise, although you know that you would probably never see them again when they leave. It’s just the way the world works now. “It takes a lot of sap, but there’s a lot of trees. I hang the buckets when the sap runs and gather it up once a day.”

Joel is impressed, certain that he’s never met a woman like you. Most women are strong in this new world but you seem to be thriving. Joel warms his hands and Ellie announces she’s gonna wash her hands before she helps you. Joel looks up as you walk over to him, displaying a piece of mistletoe in your hand. He stares at it for a second before he smiles, reaching for you. He cups your cheek and leans in to kiss you softly.

Leaning into the kiss, there’s something soft and sweet about this. You needed this. A reminder that you aren’t alone in the world and that there is good. Things to live for.

Joel knows he should be distancing himself from you but it’s hard. He pecks your lips when he hears the bathroom door open and he steps back just as Ellie enters the room. “Let’s make some candy!” She declares, rubbing her hands together.

Laughing at her enthusiasm, you show her how you are going to do it, bringing up a bucket of the sap from the cellar and pouring it into the cast iron cauldron. Soon, it’s bubbling over the fire and the entire house smells like syrup.

Joel watches you and Ellie work, making himself useful by gutting the rabbits for dinner. This feels too easy. Too domestic. It scares him a little.

It takes a long time, but Ellie is giggling as you talk about growing up here and thinking all the traditions and old ways were ridiculous when you were learning them. “Yeah, but now you have sugar.” She reminds you, making you grin. “True. And now, I’ve taught you some of the things that should never die out. Like the Christmas songs.”

Ellie grins, “so fucking cool. I wish I could’ve seen it. Before the world went to shit. How cool it must’ve been with the lights and the trees and - and the presents!” She exclaims and Joel sighs softly under his breath, wishing he could give her that dream but he can’t.

“It was really cool.” You admit. “There are times I wished that we had some sort of natural power. To run the lights.”

Ellie nods, “me too. Back in Boston, we had solar and some other sources but it wasn’t enough for a ton of lights.” She confesses, not really knowing much about how the QZ operated. Joel watches you interact with Ellie and he smiles, enjoying the way you seem to connect with her more than he has managed in months. He’s excited to spend Christmas with you and the kid. “You finish that candy yet?” He asks about an hour later.

“Almost.” You roll your eyes playfully at Ellie. About five minutes before, you had gathered clean snow in pans and you had shown her how to drizzle the thick, liquid candy into the snow and she had gone to town. “Come taste.”

Ellie grabs herself a piece, groaning at the taste, and Joel can't resist. He comes over after washing his hands and you pop a piece of candy into his mouth. He groans as the sugar hits his tongue. "Fuck, that - that's damn good." He murmurs, closing his eyes.

“Glad you enjoy.” You smile as it looks like Joel is having a religious experience. “I was thinking that some of the syrup might be used to bake the ham?” You ask, unsure of what they might think of the idea.

He nods, swallowing the candy, and finally opening his eyes. "Yes. Yes. That - Jesus, that's damn good." He confesses, licking his lips. Ellie turns her back to you both and he leans in to kiss you softly, letting you taste it from his lips.

Your eyes flutter closed and you wish that you could sink into the kiss but the kid is right here. You pull back reluctantly and smile.

The kiss is quick and Joel offers you a smirk as Ellie turns back just as he straightens up and he smiles at you softly, "let's get ready for Christmas." Joel says and Ellie grins, "fuck yes."

The day seems to go perfectly. You have decorations that you pull out and Ellie gets to squeal over. Soon the living room is filled with garland and bows, the small tree you had brought in just because you love the pine scent haphazardly decorated with the old ornaments. Adding to the decorations that you had up before they arrived. You sneak into the rooms and pull out items that both Joel and Ellie can use when they leave, a nice hunting knife that was your brothers for Ellie, thick socks and a heavy lined leather jacket for Joel, along with other things. You wrap them in scapes of flannel and bring out a stack of them to put under the tree.

Joel comes out of the bathroom to find Ellie shrieking over the tree. His eyes widen, "wow. I- shit. This is - presents?" He frowns, confused about what you managed to find to wrap up. He feels bad he didn't get you anything but he might have an idea of what to get you.

You smile at the unbridled joy on the teens face and shrug. “Just popped down to the store.” You joke. “Last minute Christmas deals are fantastic.” You had managed to find a pocket watch of your grandfather’s that was solar powered. You plan on giving it to Joel and telling him to charge it when he leaves since his wrist watch is broken.

Joel chuckles, coming over to you and he wraps his arm around your waist. “Thank you for making this so special for her.” He says, kissing your cheek. He allows himself to be tender, to shed the hard shell he hides in when he’s out there trying to survive.

“She’s a good kid.” You acknowledge, leaning into him. “I’m honestly happy that the two of you were here.” You bite your lip. “I was wondering what was the point of living out here by myself.”

Joel frowns, not liking the sound of that. He knows what it's like to be alone. "Then maybe...maybe you'll meet someone who will stay here with you. You gotta keep fighting. You gotta keep living. Otherwise all of this would've been for nothing." He says softly, his dark eyes burning into yours.

“Maybe.” You smile, the motion slightly bittersweet and shrug. “It’s not exactly a major metropolitan area. But maybe lightning will strike twice. You came when I needed something other than my own voice.”

Joel nods, letting go of you. He knows you want him to stay. If he’s honest, he wouldn’t mind staying, but he can’t. He has to find Tommy. He has to get Ellie where she needs to go. “You’ll be okay. You’re too good to not be.” He says softly as Ellie marvels over the tree. “Who wants to start preparing dinner?” You ask and Ellie nods, happy to help.

Dinner isn’t the ham, you are saving that for tomorrow, but the rabbit casserole you had decided on would go over well. You show Ellie what you are doing and how you make it and in no time, you’re sliding the dish into the oven.

Joel feels relaxed and he notices the guitar in the corner of the room. “Do you play?” He asks, trying to remember the last time he played the guitar.

“I do.” You smile at the guitar. “My father taught me a long time ago. After the world ended, it was the way we entertained ourselves during the evenings.”

“You play? I’ve always wanted to learn.” Ellie declares, eyes wide as she walks over to the guitar. “I used to play. Back in the day. I- I didn’t - haven’t played in years.” Joel confesses, “maybe we can teach you some chords?” He offers Ellie, wanting to give her something since you wrapped up some presents.

Joel nods, “I’m sure we can arrange that.” He promises and Ellie beams. 

“Great! That - fuck yes.” She says and Joel doesn’t reprimand her like he normally does. It’s Christmas Eve. 

“Come on, kid. Let’s help with the dinner.”

Ellie sets the table and Joel pours out the herbal tea you had made. “There’s a bottle of wine in the cellar.” You offer, shrugging slightly. It’s your last bottle but it’s a good excuse to open it as any. “It’s Christmas Eve.”

Joel won’t deny you if you want a drink. Hell, Bill and Frank went through most of their wine during their years together. He wouldn’t mind a glass. “Can I have a glass?” Ellie asks and Joel shakes his head, “no. You’re too young.”

You tilt your head and bite your lip, knowing it’s not your place to interfere, but you do anyway. “I don’t think a glass would hurt.” You offer. “My father let me have a small glass of wine on special occasions starting at ten years old.”

“Pleaseeee.” Ellie asks, “I used to drink vodka. Sneak it back in the QZ.” 

Joel sighs, knowing the world has gone to shit and so have social standards. He nods, “one glass.” Ellie hisses in victory and Joel snorts, “one glass.” He repeats, knowing he has to limit himself too just in case something happens. You have to always be prepared.

You hide your smirk of triumph as you get down the wine glasses. “Joel, will you go down to the cellar? The wine rack is on the left.”

Joel nods, making his way downstairs to the cellar and he sees the stored food you have there. It’s impressive. It’s clear you’ve prepared a lot and he is proud of you. You’re not his. He’s not yours, but he’s proud of the strong, capable woman you are. He grabs the wine, blowing off the dust and he carries it up the stairs.

You are pulling the casserole out of the oven when Joel comes upstairs. “Perfect timing.” You smile softly, wishing you could have this every day. “Ellie, throw another log on the fire, will you?” You ask the girl.

Ellie nods, stoking the fire, and Joel takes the wine opener, remembering how to open a bottle of wine. He pulls out the cork and grabs the glasses, pouring three glasses just as you serve up the casserole.

“Soon, the snow will bury the cabin and insulate it even more.” You muse, the wind still rattling the shutters as the snow falls. “But we are nice and cozy here. The living room looks so festive thanks to Ellie’s decorating.”

Joel hands you a glass before he hands one to Ellie, teasing her by pulling it back for a moment before letting her have it. He takes his own glass in hand and clinks it with yours and Ellie. “Merry Christmas.” He declares, reminded of when he and Tommy would cheers with beers on Christmas Eve.

“Merry Christmas.” You hum and Ellie beams. “Merry Christmas!” She all but shouts it out, making you laugh. 

“Let’s sit down and eat while it’s hot, shall we?” You ask and the teenager practically bolts for the table.

Joel chuckles and takes a seat. It’s strange to enjoy this time. To not feel like he constantly has a target on his back. He sips the wine after he sits down and groans softly at the smell of the casserole. “God, you could’ve opened a restaurant back in the day.” He compliments you.

“Thank you.” You fluster at the compliment and bite your lip. “I am sure that anything tastes good when food can be scarce.” You know you’re lucky, you had a family who worked hard and prepared so you can reap the benefits of it for years to come. “Merry Christmas, Ellie, Joel.”

Ellie holds her glass up, feeling so fucking cool as she clinks her glass with yours and says “Merry Christmas.” 

Joel smiles, clinking his glass and when his eyes meet yours, he can’t help but stare for a long moment. Taking in this rare minute of peace and happiness in his otherwise turbulent world. He feels safe and secure. A rarity. And all because of you. “Merry Christmas, sweetheart.” He murmurs, winking at you.

You fluster again, feeling your cheeks heating up and you smile. It’s been such a whirlwind and you have enjoyed having them. “May your next Christmas be just as cozy.”

Joel doubts it, unable to confirm if he’s even going to be alive for the next Christmas but he murmurs a “thanks” and takes another sip of the wine. You grin and he continues eating his dinner with a groan at how good the food is after so long without consistent meals.

The meal is finished, devoured by both Joel and Ellie taking seconds and in the younger girl’s case, thirds. You smile at Ellie after she clears the table and notice that her cheeks are flushed. “How did you like wine?” You hadn’t missed her slipping some more wine from the bottle.

“It was…okay.” She admits, “kinda burned.” 

Joel snorts, “that’s what it’s supposed to you. You get used to it. Then it tastes good.” He promises and ruffles her hair. “I think it’s time for you to go to bed. Sleep off the wine.” Joel tells the teenager.

You laugh when Ellie yawns and wish her a good night. “Presents in the morning!” She cheers and quickly shuffles off to the room that is hers for now. “I’ll clean up and then we can sleep if you want.” You offer.

Joel waits until Ellie’s door is shut and he shakes his head, setting down the plate you have in your hand on the counter, before he reaches for you to drag you against his body. His nose nudges your chin, dragging along your jaw until he whispers in your ear, “I don’t want to sleep.”

Shivering, you lean into his touch. “What do you want to do?” You whisper, almost afraid that you are reading the situation wrong.

Joel smiles against your skin, “everything. Want to touch you again. Hear you moan my name.” He murmurs, his hands sliding up until he is cupping your tits. “Want to feel you.” He whispers harshly, his mouth going dry at the idea of sliding into you again.

You moan softly and nod. “I want that too.” You agree, pressing up against him shamelessly. It’s thrilling that he wants you, even if it’s just because of convenience. Even if he just wanted you because of that, he wants you.

His hands squeeze your breasts as he kisses along your neck. “You’re so beautiful, darlin’. Wanna make you moan my name again.” He murmurs, sliding his hands back down to grip your waist and he turns you so he can softly kiss you.

The kisses you’ve shared have become familiar, your own hand sliding up into his hair as you kiss him back. Falling into his arms easily as he presses you into the counter.

His tongue slides into your mouth and he groans at the warmth of your body. He loves it. He groans into your mouth and his hands caress your body. “Bedroom.” He murmurs, wanting to see all of you.

Joel is one step behind you as you eagerly disappear into the bedroom. You’ll have to come back out, but for right now, you want nothing more than this man for Christmas.

He shuffles you into the bedroom, gently kicking the door shut behind him, and his hands grab the hem of your shirt, eager to pull it over your head. “Fuck baby. You’re so goddamn gorgeous.” He murmurs before surging down to kiss along your chest, kissing every inch of skin he can access until he bites down on your nipple through your bra.

“Joel.” You moan softly, eyes flitting closed and you are eager for him to touch you again. The fact that he is eager makes you drip with arousal. “Touch me again.” You beg softly. “Make me- I want you to fuck me.”

Joel groans as you beg him and how can he resist? He reaches behind you to unclasp your bra and drags it down your body, exposing your breasts which he eagerly attacks with his mouth, wrapping his lips around your nipple to suck and bite on it while his other hand squeezes your other breast.

His touch is burned into your skin. You will feel it for the rest of your life. Moaning, you reach down to unbutton your pants, eager to strip down and have him inside you again.

He chuckles into your flesh at the way you shove your pants down your legs and he helps you. When you’re naked, he guides you back towards the bed and pushes you down onto it. “Tell me what you want, baby.” He murmurs, his voice quiet but demanding.

You look up at him and bite your lip. “Strip for me.” You demand, wanting to see this rough, virile man take his clothes off for you. “I want to see all of you. And then I want you to make me cum.”

He can’t deny you. He shifts off of you and works on the buttons of the shirt you gave him. He slowly unbuttons it and exposes his chest. His dark eyes focus on you as he works on the belt before he unbuttons his jeans, shoving them down alongside with his briefs to expose his half hard cock.

“I want to suck your cock again before you leave.” Your cunt throbs and you have to press your thighs together. “It made me so wet.” You admit. “Want to see if it will happen again. Maybe you could cum in my mouth again?”

Joel groans, “baby. You- you don’t have to. I want to taste you again. Maybe…you wanna sit on my face and suck my cock?” He asks, always wanting to give you the choice.

You clench around nothing, turned on by the idea and you nod quickly. “Please.” You beg. “I - is it bad that I want to suck your cock? I love the way you moan.”

He s hakes his head,“not bad. Most women…they don’t like sucking cock.” He confesses. He shifts to lay down on the bed beside you. His cock hardens at the idea of you sitting on his face and he pats his cheek, “take a seat, sweetheart.”

You giggle slightly and bite your lip, wondering how to best do this. Joel takes your thigh and starts to guide you over him. “This is- really intimate.” You huff, feeling a little exposed with your holes on display to him.

He smiles, “it is but I’ll take care of you.” He promises and you hover over his face. He groans at your wet folds and he grabs your ass, pulling you down onto him with a moan of your name that’s soon smothered when his tongue slides through your folds.

Like last night and this morning, Joel’s tongue is magical, making you forget all about everything but the pleasure of him between your thighs. Until his cock twitches in front of your face because of your moans. Wrapping your fingers around his thick girth, you lean down and take the head into your mouth eagerly.

“Jesus.” He hisses into your pussy, his tongue going lazy from his swipes as you take him into your mouth. “Fuck.” He mutters into your folds and he hisses when you moan around him. Reignited, he goes hard on making you moan again, sucking your clit into his mouth.

It becomes a competition, seeing who can make the other moan louder, to stop pleasuring the other because the intensity is too much. You pump the base of his cock and take him deep into your mouth.

Joel groans into your flesh as you take him deeper, swallowing around him. He sucks on your clit, desperately trying to make you cum on his face.

You can't help but moan around his cock, grinding your hips back shamelessly onto his face. You had gotten over your embarrassment really quickly when you learned how much he liked this. It makes you take him deeper, swallowing around him as he spurs you on.

Joel groans into your cunt as you rock back onto him, helping him get you closer to cumming on his face. He pants as you work his cock a little harder, spit gathering in the coarse hair at the base of his length, and he grabs your hips, working you a little faster on top of him.

It's becoming a frenzy. Both of you are trying so hard to make the other break but Joel has the advantage of experience on his side. His grip shifts and he presses his thumb against your other hole, making you choke around his cock and the next flick of his tongue sends you flying.

Joel loves how you cry out, unable to care if you wake Ellie up as you moan so sweetly for him. He works you through it, his thumb pressed against your puckered hole until it slightly dips in to stretch you and he continues flicking your clit until you cry out in protest.

You rock your hips forward, pulling away from his still working mouth to make him chuckle. Taking his cock back in your mouth in an almost desperate attempt to make him feel just as overwhelmed although you know he will probably not want to finish in your mouth right now.

Joel pulls back, “wanna- wanna make you cum on my cock.” He pants, “please baby. Hands and knees.” He orders, wanting to do something different for you to experience everything while he’s here.

Moaning, you scramble off of him, eager to try the position you had always wanted to feel. You had been too nervous to ask if he would fuck you that way, but now you get what you want without ever even asking. “Fuck me.” You beg, looking over your shoulder as he shuffles to his knees.

​​Joel groans, leaning in to press his body against yours, his cock sliding along the crack of your ass. “Fuck baby. You’re - shit - you’re so pretty.” He murmurs, caressing your back before he grips his cock and positions himself at your entrance, slowly pushing into you.

Honestly, this position is more intense for you. He feels bigger than he had when you were riding him. Your back bows slightly and you push back to let him grind into him even more. "You're pretty." You gasp out, closing your eyes. You're sure that he's just saying that because he's inside you but you are a sure thing. He can fuck you as often as he wants while he's here. "More baby, please."

He can’t fucking deny you anything when your pussy is choking him like a goddamn vice. He pants and caresses your ass before smacking it. “You want more?” He asks and your pathetic whine makes him chuckle. He goes harder, his hips hitting your ass, and he eagerly watches the flesh jiggle.

All you can do is hold on, your fingers twisting in the sheets under you. After a particularly rough thrust, your elbows give out and you collapse down onto your face, right as you moan out his name. "Jooooooeeeellllllllll."

He groans, “that’s it baby. God, feel so fuckin’ tight around my cock.” He hisses, thrusting deep and hard. He shifts to plant his foot on the bed, jaw clenched as he works to push you into an orgasm. He wants to hear it again.

Rocking into you harshly, you grunt and moan while he fucks you. Clenching down around him every time he pushes deep, you love the way he twitches inside you. “Joel, fuck, yes.”

He groans as you clench around him. He reaches down to rub your clit, “cum for me. Cum for me baby.” He leans over you, kissing along your neck.

His chest is at your back and you moan. The expert touch of his fingers quickly has your body bucking under his. Starting to cum just like he ordered you to.

Joel groans when you clamp around his cock. He pants into your ear, kissing along your neck, and he rubs your clit a little faster to work you through it. “That’s it, baby.” He coos, rocking into you.

You pant against the sheet and moan. Wishing that he would fill you up just once so you could experience it. “Cum for me.” You whimper, closing your eyes in bliss.

He pants, so close to orgasm, and he hisses as he rocks into you. Over and over again. “Fuck. I- shit. Shit. Shit.” He manages to pull out just as he cums over your ass and back, hot seed hitting your skin.

You whine at the loss of his cock inside you, humming as you listen to him gasp for breath. “Fuck.” Your grin is tired and satisfied as you slowly straighten out on the bed. You know you will have to let him clean you up, or go to the bathroom to clean, but you don’t want to move right now.

Joel is uncaring as he looms over you and kisses along your neck. “So good, baby.” He murmurs, caressing your side until he’s shuffling off of the bed to head into the bathroom to clean you up.

Listening to someone move around the house is a luxury that you savor. Closing your eyes again with a smile on your face. Almost ready to beg him to stay and help you stave off the loneliness but you know he can’t.

Joel comes back in with a wet rag to clean you. He caresses your skin after you’re clean and leans down to kiss you softly. “Get into bed, sweetheart. It’ll be Christmas morning before you even know it.” He promises, tossing the rag in the sink after cleaning himself up and he pulls the covers back for you to get under them.

You climb into bed and into his arms. Enjoying the strength and steadiness of his heart beating in his chest. “Good night, Joel.” You murmur, holding back a yawn and suddenly ready to sleep.

Joel wraps around you after he blows out the candle on the nightstand. He smiles and kisses you softly until he falls asleep, a rare look of complete peace on his face. He winces when the sunlight streams through the slats of the shutters hours later and realizes it’s Christmas Day. He smiles softly and kisses your face, waiting until you whimper awake and he whispers, “Merry Christmas, baby.”

“Merry Christmas.” You groan softly, waking up and snuggling into his hold and sighing contentedly. You feel warm, safe and not alone, something that you had been wishing for a long time. It’s the best gift that you could have been given and you tilt your head up to kiss his chin. “Best Christmas ever.” You hum, kissing down along his throat gently, enjoying the sleep-warm scent of him. Memorizing it for when your bed is colder without him. “We should get up and get ready for an excited teenager.” 

Joel groans softly, playfully, wrapping his arm around your waist. “Or we could just stay here all day.” He suggests just seconds before he kisses you softly. “She would kick the door down. She’s so excited.” He chuckles against your lips.

You sigh softly and smile. “We will have a good day. Pretend the world is normal outside.” You tell him. “Be cozy in this little bubble for awhile.”

Joel smiles, kissing your head, and he shifts to get out of the bed, grabbing his pajama pants, and he looks over at you, winking. “I’ll go make some coffee.” He offers as he grabs his shirt and slips out of your room into the kitchen.

You lay there for a moment before you get up and start dressing. Listening to the sounds of Joel opening the wood box in the stove and stirring the coals. The thunk of more wood being added. It’s completely domestic and you love it more than you should.

Ellie comes out once you’re dressed, eyes wide at the presents under the tree. “We got presents?” She exclaims and you nod, “yeah. Santa came.” You tease and she grins, rushing over to you and she wraps her arms around you. “You’re the fucking best.”

You grin as you hug her back. “You’re welcome. I hope that you like what I picked out for you.” The smell of coffee soon fills the air and you look towards the kitchen. “How about we have breakfast first and then presents?” You suggest.

Ellie pouts a little and Joel nods, reminded of Sarah when she used to be so eager to open gifts on Christmas morning. “Breakfast first.” He says sternly and Ellie nods, knowing it’s best to not argue with her father figure.

You decided to make breakfast quick since Ellie was so excited, so it’s done almost as soon as the coffee and you grin as you set it on the table. “We will have presents opened in no time.” You promise her with a wink. 

Ellie tries not to pout as she agrees while Joel pours you out a coffee. You wink at him and he leans in to kiss you softly, “merry Christmas baby.” He murmurs and Ellie smirks, “Joel. Never knew you were a softie.”

Joel rolls his eyes and huffs but you just grin at how cheeky she is. Bolting down her breakfast as quickly as she can in her eagerness to get the day moving along so she can open her presents. Taking a sip of your coffee, you start your own breakfast when Joel sits down. It sounds like the storm has died down outside and the cabin is nice and warm. It’s a good day.

Youk grin as Ellie practically vibrates as she looks at the presents under the tree. “Go on sweetheart. Get the presents handed out.” Joel orders, knowing he would get Sarah to do that for him and Tommy when they’d celebrate Christmas.

You show Ellie which pill of presents is which, and pour you and Joel refresher cups of coffee to bring into the living room. The fire has been built back up and for a moment, you pretend, it’s just a normal Christmas morning. Sitting down on your old sofa and reaching for a throw to toss over your legs as Ellie bounces around creating two piles of gifts between her and Joel.

Joel frowns when he sees you don’t have anything and he remembers the simple gold ring he keeps on the gold chain around his neck. It belonged to his mother and no one has really seen it. He kept it hidden when he was in the QZ but grabbed it when he was leaving. He watches Ellie divide the presents and he looks at you, “this is too much, baby.” He says and Ellie is already ripping into a present.

“No it’s not.” You shake your head. “Things are hard to come by.” You murmur quietly. “I’m all alone. I don’t need my entire family’s wardrobe and things.” You remind him. “You two will be more comfortable traveling.”

Joel nods, opening a present to see a flannel shirt. “Thank you, sweetheart.” He murmurs and leans in to kiss your cheek. He watches Ellie open her presents with a grin and he frowns when you hand him another present. He quietly opens it, the velvet case and his eyes widen when he sees the watch. “This- I can’t accept this.”

“Yes you can.” You shake your head. “It’s solar. Hasn’t been used since my daddy died, but it’s a good watch.” You tell him. “I noticed your watch is broken, you wear it for the memory it carries. This will carry the memory of this Christmas, of me, with you.” You reach for his hand and close it over the watch. “I want you to carry it with you when you leave here.”

Joel caresses the watch, honored you’d want to give him something so special, so close to your family. He swallows harshly and leans in to kiss your cheek. “Thank you. I- wow. I - thank you.” He repeats, feeling a little overwhelmed. “Thank you baby.” He murmurs, “I love it.”

“Of course.” Ellie squeals and coos over her presents, clothes from your younger years and even some of your old jewelry for her to have. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” She squeals and crushes you in a hug before she bounds off to try on the new things. You are happy she enjoyed everything and she’s having a good Christmas. “Now, I’ll start our dinner and make us some hot toddy’s to enjoy.”

Joel nods, “I’m just gonna use the bathroom.” He murmurs and stands up, heading into the bathroom to pull the chain from around his neck so he can take the ring off. He places the chain around his neck and holds the ring, heading out into the kitchen to find you. “Baby. I - I have a gift for you. It- it was my mom’s. I want you to have it.”

It takes you a minute to realize he’s trying to give you a ring. “Joel.” You whisper, frowning at the ring. You know that he will give you the same argument that you had given him. It’s probably the only thing that he has to offer you in his mind and to refuse it would be an insult. You look up into his eyes. “It’s beautiful.”

Joel smiles softly, a rare event, “like you. I want you to have it. You’ve shown us so much - well, no one has ever been quite as nice and I want you to have something special.” He says, reaching down to close your fist around the ring. “It’s something to remember me by.”

“I’ll never forget you, I promise.” You reach up with your other hand to cup his cheek. “Thank you, Joel. I’ll cherish it.” Leaning in, you kiss him softly, wishing again that he could stay and you could see what could grow between you. But it’s not to be. “Merry Christmas.”

Joel smiles, enjoying that you are happy on this holiday. “Merry Christmas.” He cups your cheek, his dark eyes meeting yours and he leans to softly kiss you. “I’ll never forget you.” He promises, “never.”

****

You shove another wrapped parcel of food into Ellie’s bag, zipping it up and patting it. They have stayed for two more days until the storm passed and every day was spent falling in love with both of them. Nights in Joel’s arms and days playing board games with Ellie and laughing at her sense of humor. Now it is time for them to leave and you are putting on a brave face. “You are all set.” You promise her, accepting the bone crushing hug she gives you and when she pulls away, you wrap her scarf around her neck and pull the beanie down over her ears. “Stay warm.”

“I’m gonna miss you.” Ellie huffs, squeezing you tight once more and pulls away to wipe her eyes since she’s told you she’s not going to cry. 

Joel swallows harshly as he steps towards you after you hug Ellie. He pulls you close, burying his face in your hair, breathing you in. He’s going to miss you. So much. He has to leave though. He leans down to press his lips to yours, uncaring of Ellie watching as his tongue slides against your lips.

It’s easy to let him in again. Clinging to him and cherishing the last kiss you’ll ever have. “Stay safe.” You beg softly after a long minute where you are both panting for air when you pull back. “I hope you accomplish your mission. Find your brother, be happy.”

Joel doubts he could be happy. Not like how he’s felt while he’s been with you. These past few days…he hasn’t felt this at peace since he…well, pre-outbreak. He sighs and rests his forehead against yours and he kisses you softly one last time. “Be good for me, baby.” He murmurs against your lips, “stay alive.” He adds, knowing that being alone can be hard.

You give a small smile, knowing you can’t promise that, just like he can’t promise to be safe. The world is full of uncertainties and danger. Watching them from your porch is the hardest thing you’ve done in a long time. Waiting until they disappear from sight before you go back inside, the warm cabin is colder and lonelier now without the two people who had literally broken in and stolen your heart.

****

It’s been a year. Joel has been keeping track of the time and he asked Tommy to confirm it. After telling Ellie his plan, she’d been all in on joining him on the trek back to your cabin. Along the way, he had chopped down the best Christmas tree he could find and he knocks on your cabin with the snow just starting to fall on Christmas Eve.

Your gun in your hand, you warily unbar the door and slowly open it. You had shuttered the cabin earlier and the decorations are still in the box, in no mood this year for Christmas. The knock on the door seems almost surreal and you squint out through the crack before your eyes widen. “J-Joel? Ellie?” 

He grins, seeing your beautiful face, and his memories did you no justice. God, you’re gorgeous. He nods, seeing the gun and he doesn’t care as he surges forward to cup your cheek and press his lips to yours.

You melt into the kiss immediately. Hastily setting the gun down on the table next to the door and throwing your arms around him. You never thought you would see him again and here he is, on your doorstep for a Christmas Eve. It’s the best present you’ve ever had.

He kisses you until he’s pulling back and pecking your lips. “Jesus, it’s freezing. Can we come in?” Ellie eventually interrupts the moment and Joel rolls his eyes. “I missed you.” He murmurs after they take off their jackets and boots and he’s wrapping his arms around you. “We found my brother. He’s - he’s in Jackson. It’s - it’s amazing. It’s a proper town. With people. Doctors. A goddamn bar. Come back with us to our house.” He requests softly.

“Your house? L-leave?” You are so confused but Ellie pipes in. 

“Joel and I have a house. It’s got plenty of room and we want you to come. We can bring whatever you want and come back with the wagons to get everything.” She bites her lip. “Joel’s missed you. A lot. He’s been a grumpy fucker since we left.” 

Your eye brow lifts when Joel nods. “I’ve missed you.” He repeats. “I want you to come live with me and Ellie. You can bring the chickens and everything you want from here.”

You stare at him in shock. It’s been a year and he hasn’t stopped thinking about you. “Baby. I- I want you to come back with us but you don’t - it’s your choice.” He promises, caressing your cheek and he lowers his hand, “you don’t have to decide now. It’s Christmas. Let’s celebrate and decorate the tree and then we can discuss it.” He promises, trying to compromise.

“I- yes..” you decide instantly. “We will have our Christmas here and then I will go back with you to Jackson.” You have been miserable without Joel or anyone else here and you never thought you would see him again. He’s back and he wants you with him. Christmas with Joel might have started here, with the white Christmas that had blown him into your life, but next year, you will celebrate with Joel and Ellie in Jackson. Next year and years to come.

[backslashdelta]

Blaine-friendly Kurtbastian Fic Recs

Putting a list together for @fallevs, but I hope this will be useful for anyone who wants to dip their toes into Kurtbastian fanfiction but doesn't want to read anything anti-Blaine! Everything included in this list will either not include Blaine at all, or if he is in the fic, it will be neutral or friendly toward him.

I've tried to include a wide range of words counts as well, so that you can start with something short and sweet or dive into something big, whatever you feel like. If anyone else has some recommendations to add, please feel free to reblog this list and add more!

Europe Is Our Playground by @glitterdammerung - 53,430 words

Summary: Eight years and half the world away from home, a chance encounter in a Paris club leads Kurt and Sebastian - each running from the ghosts of their pasts - into the diversion of chasing each other across Europe.

(Let's give them) Something to talk about by MemeKonGlee - 20,529 words

Summary: “I need you to—” “I heard you the first time,” Kurt interrupts, putting his fork and knife down on his plate and pushing his half-finished pancakes aside. “What I meant was: what the hell?” He points towards the neglected pancakes, trying to stall in the face of Kurt’s reaction. “Are you sure you don’t wanna finish that first?” The look in Kurt's eyes tells him in no uncertain terms that no, he doesn't want to finish his pancakes, Jesus. And so Sebastian has no option but to take a deep breath in, exhale slowly through his mouth and just… get on with it, internally cringing at how unbelievably ridiculous it all sounds when he puts it in words, all out there for the world (and more importantly, Kurt fucking Hummel) to judge. It all boils down to: I fucked up and I'm too proud to deal with it the mature way.

Safe Mode by flipmeforward - 18,118 words

Summary: An AU in which Kurt and Sebastian never met in high school. Instead, they meet at &brave--an up-and-coming online fashion company where Kurt is the new assistant slash blogger (one day he will figure out a better title), and Sebastian is the less than pleasant tech support guy. Kurt does his best to avoid Sebastian and his rude attitude at all possible costs, but it turns out that technology is not his friend. It also turns out that Sebastian might maybe possibly be (okay, probably is) more than just an annoying coworker.

Come On And Mess Me Up by @pouralittlewater - 215,339 words

Summary: “It’s like...When Harry Met Sally,” Santana told him. “No. That was me and Blaine.” “How? You literally got together in months. You and Sebastian have been skirting the issue for years. This whole “will they, won’t they” thing is getting old.” Or, when Sebastian enrolls in McKinley High and joins Glee right before the duet competition. What Kurt thinks could be the start to a great friendship in gay camaraderie quickly explodes in his face as he realizes being around Sebastian makes him want to set the other boy on fire. However, over time, that feeling dissipates. Even without the title of friendship, the two become ingrained in each other's lives in a way neither ever expected to.

Thunderbolts & Lightning by @alphabees-writes - 1,854 words

Summary: Sebastian has a plan. It goes wrong, and then right, and then wrong again.

tension bars by @cryscendo - 824 words

Summary: Prompt by backslashdelta: kurt, sports!au (gymnastics), exes, “sometimes, i sit in bed and wonder what would happen if things were different.”

I Want The World To See You'll Be With Me by @backslashdelta (me!) - 2,405 words

Summary: Kurt and Sebastian attend a Christmas party, and Sebastian has a special surprise for Kurt afterward.

Dessert by @nalasan - 1,175 words

Summary: “Oh my God,” Sebastian says, staring at the plate in front of him. “We have to break up.” Kurt, who has just walked into their living room and is still in his winter coat, raises his eyebrow quizzically; his expression more bemused than worried, “And why is that?” “Just look at that,” Sebastian replies, gesturing at the table in front of him like he is seeing it for the first time: the white tablecloth, the candles in their silver candleholders, the white roses in their vase in the middle of the table, and the dinner Sebastian has been preparing since he came home three hours ago.

And Why Is That? by @20xbetterthanu - 41,321 words

Summary: "I love you, and I hate myself for that." "And why is that?" Love hurts.

Note from me: this fic is definitely not anti-Blaine, however it does heavily involve Blaine and he is Not having a good time, so I maybe wouldn't recommend it if you want to avoid him (and the other boys!) being sad.

A Change In The Weather by cacophonylights - 209,414 words

Summary: The summer before college Kurt is shocked when Sebastian comes to him with a timely offer he can’t refuse.  He’ll get something he needs to realize his dreams, but in return he has to play the role of Sebastian’s boyfriend for the summer.  Neither of them know just how much their worlds are about to change. For a GKM prompt.

Note from me: this fic COULD be considered anti-Blaine, but I don't personally consider it to be; it maybe doesn't paint him in the most positive light, but I think it's still neutral enough to be on this list, and it's essentially required reading at this point! Also, it is famously unfinished, but there are a couple fan sequels: ACITW AU by @lady-divine-writes A Drop In The Ocean by @daftydraw and jwmelmoth The ACITW link above is for livejournal, but you can also find the original fic on AO3 in two parts here and here.

[lilyrizzy]

day 2 of the 12 days of Christmas maxiel advent calendar for @catofthecanals289!

"What are you reading?"

Max had been expecting this or some other conversation starter from Daniel. Since climbing into bed to find Max ignoring him in favour of his book, he's been making a big show of 'getting comfy'. It’s involved a lot of dramatic sighing, rearranging the bed covers and wriggling, all of which Max has been stubbornly ignoring.

He is just getting to the interesting part.

"A book," he says not lifting his eyes from the page, then just to be an asshole, "You know, the paper that has words on which tell a story?"

Of course, Daniel knows really. On his bedside table there is his own stack of books that range from the biographies of UFC fighters filled with bloody tales of victory, to the romance novels that he and Victoria post back and forth, and then spend hours discussing on the phone when they have both finished.

"Wow, really?" Daniel says sarcastically, as his toes poke Max's calf under the covers. Then, settling closer, so his head is resting on Max’s pillow, "What’s the story?"

Max sighs, resting the book open on his chest so as not to lose his place. Even after years together, Max still hasn't become immune to the way Daniel can so easily steal all his attention, making it impossible to focus on anything or anyone else. Since he started talking Max has already read the same sentence three times over.

It is of course, not very fair because Max had warned Daniel that he wanted to finish this chapter tonight, but Max finds that, like always, he isn't really annoyed. It is just so typical of Daniel to now demand his undivided attention.

Maybe this is payback for all the blow jobs Max initiates while he is having ‘important’ phone conversations with his Enchanté people, though Daniel never seemed to mind much at the time.

"It is a mystery book," Max says simply, then, "a scary one, so of course you will not like it."

Daniel makes an indignant noise of protest.

"Woah, come on mate," he says, his soft brown eyes wide on Max’s face as his head tilts up to look at him. Now, it is firmly rested on Max's shoulder, Daniel inching closer by the second. "I've got balls of steel, nothing scares me."

Max doesn't need to say, except sharks, and dogs, and coming out of the closet, because his raised eyebrows do it for him. Daniel rolls his eyes, but he does relent a little.

"Well, okay,” he allows, "whatever. But a little book can't scare me."

Taking in the stubborn look on Daniel’s face, Max can’t help the way his lips twitch upwards. Daniel’s toes have stopped prodding, and are now just rubbing gently up and down Max’s leg, catching the hair there against the grain. Daniel’s own legs are buttery smooth from his waxing appointment earlier today. Max knows because nuzzled between them on the sofa as soon as Daniel got home, just had to get his mouth on them to feel how there would be nothing for his tongue to catch against for a few days, until it started to grow back.

Every change to Daniel’s body, Max wants to be the first to know it.

“Do you want sex again?” Max asks, “Is that why you are being a pest?” Then, giving into a grin, he adds, “A sex pest.”

He’s proud of his joke, then prouder when Daniel laughs so loud Sassy raises her head to glare at him from where she had been sleeping soundly at the bottom of their bed.

“Nah,” Daniel says easy, and nuzzles further into Max’s side as if to prove a point. “I just- Will you read to me?” As though sensing Max’s hesitation, he adds, “It’s been a long fucking week.”

It has. Daniel got home from Australia only a few nights ago, dead on his feet with the jet lag only to be thrown straight into Alpha Tauri’s media duties, and Max into Red Bull’s. In a few days, they will need to leave again, to fly to Barcelona for testing. The moments they manage to snatch truly for them and nobody else will become farther and farther apart again, as will the nights they get to spend in their own home, in their own bed.

“Okay,” Max relents, with this in mind, “but no interrupting all of the time with questions. The Q and A will take place at the end.”

His request will fall on deaf ears, no doubt, and Max will indulge all of Daniel’s musings like always.

“Pinky swear,” Daniel promises, and he lifts up his little finger to hook around Max’s. It’s the one with the blank space that Daniel has also promised to cover with the number ‘33,’ when they retire, to match the other. Max lifts it to his lips to kiss it, before he picks up the book to find his place again.

He still doesn’t think Daniel will like the story much, but as he shuffles down to settle his head against Max’s chest, breath fanning out over the sensitive skin of Max’s nipples, Max begins to read.

“Now imagine just beyond your peripheral vision, maybe behind you, maybe to the side of you, maybe even in front of you, but right where you can't see it, something is quietly closing in on you, so quiet in fact you can only hear it as silence. Find those pockets without sound. That's where it is. Right at this moment.

But don't look.

I didn’t.”

-

Max is at the beach.

There are soft grains of sand under his toes, and sunlight so strong it is blinding him as he squints out to the sea, looking. He’s walking towards the water, but even though the sand becomes damp against the soles of his feet, the vast expanse of blue seems to get further and further away.

“Max,” Daniel’s voice comes as a hushed but frantic whisper, as though carried to him on the wind. “Maxy.”

It’s then Max realises whose silhouette he is trying to make out on the horizon. He can’t see him though, no matter how much wider he tries to open his eyes against the overbearing sun, and how fast he starts to run towards it.

“Daniel!” He yells, but it’s as though the wind carries his voice the wrong way, behind him. It’s lost. “Daniel!” He tries again, but this time there is only silence in the place of his voice. Now in the water, he can make out circling objects in the shape of shark fins. His lungs burn as his feet slap wetly against the ground, slowing him down.

“Max,” Daniel’s voice is louder now, more urgent. The sharks are going to eat him, if Max doesn’t get there in time. “Maxy, baby-“

“Max, wake up.”

Max’s eyes fly open. Gone is the quicksand beneath his feet, the blazing light, and the battering wind. It’s replaced instead with the dark and warm of their bedroom. Against his side, Daniel’s body is so hot and every place they are touching is sweat sticky. Still, Max’s arms tighten around him, silently reminding himself that home means safety these days.

His heart is still hammering in his chest, but he tries to sound controlled when he lets out a sleep-stained, croaky, “Hey.”

“Sorry.” Daniel sounds guilty, and Max frowns, his brain still too cloudy with sleep to work anything out.

“What is it?”

He’s expecting to hear that one of the cats- which always become Max’s cats the moment they misbehave- has thrown up on the bed again, or maybe Max was just disturbing Daniel with his nightmare. Instead-

“Don’t laugh,” Daniel says, his voice a whisper in the dark even though there is no one else to wake up now. “Don’t- Can you go check the bathroom?”

Max rubs his eyes, blearily. A glance at the clock on his bedside table tells him it is 2 AM, so he can’t have been asleep for long.

“Check the- What? Daniel, what-“

“I think I heard something,” Daniel interrupts him, “can you just- Please, baby, can you just check no one is in there.”

For a moment, Max lies completely still, trying to catch the noise Daniel is referring to. Probably, it is one of the cats, but when Max sits up in the bed and looks down at where Daniel is curled beneath the covers with only his head poking out from beneath them, he can make out the shine of his wide, pleading eyes even in the dark.

“Is this because of the scary book?” Max asks, his eyebrows raised, “Because-“

“Max, please,” Daniel says again, a little desperately, interrupting the glory of Max’s, I told you so.

Shaking his head with a fond smile, Max swings his legs over the side of the bed and gets to his feet.

“Really, Daniel,” he says, padding towards their bathroom door, “it is very unfair that if there was a murderer in our home, you are happy to sacrifice me to them.”

What he doesn’t say is the way it is also nice, that they can find just the kind of safety they need in each other.

“Yeah, yeah,” Daniel says, trying for casual but his still slightly shaking voice gives him away, “I’ll remember to feed the beasts if you get ghost murdered.”

“Oh, it’s a ghost now?” Max muses with another laugh as he flicks on the light. He doesn’t need to look, because of course there is no one in the home apart from him, Daniel and the cats, but he makes a show of doing it anyway, to put Daniel’s mind at ease. “Well, please be quiet Mr Ghost, it is bedtime.”

As suspected, Sassy looks up at him guiltily from where she’d been sharpening her claws on the bathmat. Max leans down to pat her bum and move her along, then flicks the light off again. Just for good measure, he looks inside their wardrobe and under their bed, before getting back into it.

“The coast is clear,” Max promises, lifting up his arm for Daniel to curl back underneath. Still, he is too hot, but for a few more moments he can stand some cuddling, if it means the thundering of Daniel’s heart he can feel pressed against him begins to slow.

“The ghost is clear,” Daniel corrects, and then they both dissolve into overtired giggles. When they’ve trailed off into silence, save for the purring of Jimmy who has now joined them to see what all the excitement is about, Daniel says again, softer, “Thank you, baby.”

Max just presses a kiss to the tip of Daniel’s nose, before succumbing to his heavy eyelids, and turning over onto his side to sleep. Of course, Daniel presses himself all along the line of Max’s back, but Max doesn’t protest. He can endure a little longer.

He is about to drop off, when-

“You can’t tell anyone your stupid book scared the shit out of me, okay?” Daniel whispers, lips catching on the back of Max’s neck, making him shiver. He’ll save the follow up of that feeling for the morning.

Now, he just reaches a hand behind himself blindly in the dark, until he finds the top of Daniel’s tattooed thigh to squeeze it gently. His fingertips trace over where he knows the heart will be, without even having to look

“Of course, I will not,” he promises easily, “would not want to ruin the, what was it again? 'Balls of steel' reputation?”

Besides, there are some parts of Daniel he likes to keep all for himself.

[cowboyjen68]

Hi Jen, sorry for dumping a big rant in your askbox but your blog has helped me figure out my identity and I don’t have anyone to talk to about this in real life lol. Feel free to delete if this is too weird.

So I’m a 17 y/o butch, and I have been masculine since I was a little kid. I always felt lucky to have a family that was generally okay with my gender nonconformity. They treated it like a cute quirk of mine, and I never felt like I was being judged or that I should change the way I am around them. My dad got a kick out of it. One summer he let me help him build the deck in our backyard. He always took me to baseball games, he dressed me up in his old clothes, basically treated me like I was his son and I loved it.

I feel like as I get older, my masculinity becomes less acceptable. I went to visit my paternal grandmother for the holidays, hadn’t seen her in a few years, and the first thing she said to me was “I thought you would’ve grown out of all that by now” (in reference to my haircut and outfit, I think.) I just don’t know how to react to the way my extended family treats me now. They used to be totally fine with it, but I spent my entire Christmas feeling like I was being judged for every little thing.

Like, what’s changed? Why is it cute and funny when a little girl wears boy’s clothes and wrestles with her cousins, but disgusting when I grow up and settle into my masculinity?

It’s like I’ve crossed the invisible line between being a tomboy and being a dyke, and now no one wants to entertain it anymore.

Again, sorry for the rant haha, I just feel like I’m going crazy because I tried to talk to my sister about it and she said she didn’t notice them acting any different, but I swear my aunt spent half of our Christmas dinner telling me how pretty I would be if I just wore a bit of makeup lmaoo. I’m just wondering if anyone else has experienced this, because I’m feeling pretty lost right now. Thanks, and happy holidays!

It is not weird at all. I hear that young lesbians, particularly butches, do not have older role models to bounce ideas off of or vent or get any perspective on certain experiences. Moms and Dads and straight sisters and cousins, no matter how well meaning, will just not always "get" what is happening. They say things like "we love you no matter what" and "we don't care if you are a lesbian" and they mean it, mostly. But they often don't see the subtle clues (or blatant ones)they toss around that indicates how uncomfortable they are with you being so visible, but just existing as you naturally are.

AND OH MY GOSH yes I have experienced exactly what you are talking about with the deepening judgement as you move from a cute little Tomboy to an adult butch women. It is almost like they hope to "catch it early" when we are in our teens and redirect us away from the "danger" of being a visible lesbian. And a woman who does not, in very overt ways, conform to their idea of how a woman should be and act.

My dad was relatively consistent in treating me pretty much like he would a son and, to his credit, he did so with my straight sister. We were allowed to do just about anything my older brothers did. In part because my sister was pretty strong willed but also a lot like him. I was less strong willed but she had mowed the path.

Mom was the one who was forever concerned about my looks and behavior, both out of worry I would not fit in, and because she had a certain expectation of how her daughter should grow up. Both normal Mom reactions. She understood bullies and knew that sticking out could be difficult. Her solution was not to strengthen my resilience but to attempt to "tone me down". Her efforts increased as I made the jump from kid to teen and into my late teens. She would discourage me from cutting my hair, becoming almost angry when I brought it up. She would tell me how lovely I was in dresses and skirts and say thing like " a little make up would be nice". It got really old. It lead to us not always getting along even though I loved and respected my mom. She was a great mom. But this one thing made us both crazy. She could not cool it and I could not change who I was.

Friends at school saw hints of my liking girls. I stopped wearing cowboy boots and my favorite horse buckle and it their place went with K Mart Tennis shoes and a generic belt that came with my pants, again, from Kmart. I put away the cowboy fringed shirts and flannel and went with simple jeans and sweatshirts, the acceptable attire for boys and girls in my rural high school. I kept my hair long to disguise my "looking like a boy" traits.

I (barf) agreed to date a boy and spent the better part of that time making excuses to not kiss him or spent time with him. I was starting to listen to mom and do my best to hide ME from the world. Anything (with in reason) to throw the world off the scent, the scent of me being a lesbian. Being butch made that one more step difficult.

It is hard to hide the space we take up naturally.

It might seem hard to see it now by your family is slightly well intentioned, knowing that being "seen" easily as a lesbian can be dangerous. But also, they are uncomfortable with your energy and physical presence because it does not coincide with their ideas of what a woman acts, feels and moves like. This is a THEM problem and I can give you words of comfort based on experience.

The more you begin to be you, and dress in what gives you comfort the more your confidence will grow and be evident. People who are emboldened to try and change you for their own comfort tend to back way off when there is no opening for their opinions. They just sort of realize they are wasting time. AND for those that don't, there are always a few, you don't have to give them any air or acknowledgement. You get to let them waste time and energy while you look great in whatever you wish to wear and however you wish to cut your hair. And in a wonderful turn around, you don't have to spend any effort just being you or trying to defend or correct them.

You are fast approaching adulthood and with that will come even more freedom and independence. Don't rush it but also, work towards that.

[chvoswxtch]

Congratulations on 4K Court! 🤎

may I please request an americano (iced if you wish… I wouldn’t complain) with Matty based on “he was chaos, he was revelry, bedroom eyes like a remedy”…. I know you can nail the “But Daddy I Love Him” vibes. ☕️

Thanks pretty baby!

you can't give me a song that has bedroom eyes in it & not expect me to make it slutty

you really can't give me anything matty related & not expect me to make it slutty, honestly

I didn't realize beforehand how perfectly this song fits him, but it absolutely does, so thank you for pointing that out to me & letting me have fun with this ;)

as a reminder, over ice means it's spicy! (minors dni)

blurb below the cut

order for matt with a shot of but daddy i love him

he was chaos, he was revelry / bedroom eyes like a remedy

Matt Murdock was not a perfect boyfriend. Everyone around you seemed to feel the need to voice their reservations, shrouding their unsolicited opinions under the guise of concern. Your parents were weary of you pursuing a stable future with a man that allowed his clients to pay in baked goods. Your “friends” looked on you with pity every time Matt couldn’t accompany you to some party or dinner, incessantly encouraging you to cut your losses and find a more “suitable” partner.

They all claimed they just wanted what was “best” for you, but if they were so blinded by their own undesired judgment that they couldn’t see the genuine happiness in your smile every time his name was mentioned, or the way your eyes lit up like the grand tree in Rockefeller Center at Christmas whenever he entered a room, then they didn’t really know you, and they certainly didn’t know Matt. Not like you did.

Perfection was not what you wanted from Matt, anyway. Sure his dual life as a lawyer by day and vigilante by night was complicated, and oftentimes it came with a storm of chaos, but you two navigated it the way you did everything else: together. 

The only luxury you desired was being his. Matt was the one you wanted. There was no shadow of a doubt in your mind, and every single blood cell in your heart agreed. There was no space for anyone else to occupy your soul, and there never would be. If Matt proposed to you tomorrow with a ring constructed of paper, you’d accept it joyously.

You didn’t give a shit if Matt couldn’t make it to some pretentious dinner party surrounded by a bunch of people that you weren’t even that fond of. The whispered rumors of infidelity and empty condolences aimed at your back didn’t bother you, because you knew better. They didn’t know the true nature of the crimes Matt was really out committing disguised as the Devil, and that little secret made you smirk every time you overheard a tale of your “misfortune”, or your name replaced with “poor thing”.

Oh, if they only knew.

If they could only see you know with your dress unbuttoned, Matt’s greedy hands canvassing every inch of your soft skin, marking your neck up in violet and maroon tattoos of possession. If they could only hear the way he sang hymns of your name, honey dipped praises caressing the lobe of your ear along with his lips, delectable sounds of worship torn from the depth of his chest and echoing around his apartment. If they only knew that Matt couldn’t even make it to his bedroom, that his ravenous and primal desire had him pressing your back up against his front door with your legs woven around his lower back, fucking you lovingly but relentlessly.

They couldn’t feel the passion of his hips colliding into yours repeatedly, his warm tongue savoring the taste of your flesh, his cock reaching a depth within you only he could find that sent you both to the heavens above. They couldn’t hear the sacred vows he cried out to you, loud enough for his God and all of his neighbors down the hall to hear. They couldn’t see that even though his captivating hazel eyes were void of sight, they were fixed in your direction with nothing but pure adoration and devotion.

They would never know how good it felt to be loved by Matt. They would never know that you felt Matt’s love all around you, like the first icy wind of winter through your hair or the first kiss of summer’s sunshine on your cheeks.

No one would ever truly know you, except for Matt.

So if everyone wanted to keep bitching and moaning about how you should “come to your senses”, fuck ‘em.

[no1heyyyyyyyy]

Ambessa as a partner

Hello, I have decided to write for more characters. If you want to know, you’ll have to wait and find out because I’m still trying to figure it out myself. Thank you.

Ambessa is a passionate woman who has never been one to mince her words, so expect a large amount of open and honest conversations If you two are in a relationship that has sex involved, there will be a very lengthy conversation about that before anything proceeds She does not expect reciprocation, she just wants you to have a good time so there will be a lot of check ins In a non-sexual context she is very in-tune with her partner’s emotions and she can read people so easily, but the people she cares about- it’s as easy as breathing for her

I feel that she may be possessive, but she would not kill anyone in the name of her partner as long as her partner wasn’t hurt I know that there are headcanons that lean into her more brutal nature, but I personally feel that Ambessa is a woman with a very strict set of priorities, and that hierarchy will only change if she falls in love with a person If her partner were to jokingly flirt with someone else, she would be more cold than normal. She is a grown woman and refuses to be treated like a teenager or have a partner who’s idea of fun is engaging in middle school manners and straight up disrespect She understands that it is thrilling to get her attention in that way, but she will not care. She will take away her attention from you and take some time to herself instead. She will be clear about what she expects from the relationship and will distance herself for a day or two.  Within that time away she wants to see that her partner can own up to their behavior. She wants to see that her feelings will be heard and honored. Now, if her partner was hurt, that would be a different story. She would personally drop you off at a clinic with the best healers, and go and find the shithead who roughed you up. She will have them brought to y'all's (yes I am southern, no I do not have an accent) home and if you’re not too triggered to see the person who harmed you, then she will bring them before you and ask what you would like to be done to them. She has an utmost respect for her partner, we can see in the show how affectionate and caring she it towards that little twink that follows her around. This leads me to believe that no matter what you say, she will respect it. If you ask for the person to not be hurt and just imprisoned instead, then that will happen. If you ask for the person to be murdered she will be happy to oblige.

Ambessa is a very caring partner who thrives off of physical connections.  She is very touchy and would love to have a partner who is just as physically affectionate as she is. However, she would be willing to accommodate her partner in whatever way they need if they don’t like to be touched that much. She loves kisses so much and wants to cover her partners face in them- you find it funny that she’s so open with affection when she is so physically intimidating She’s also big on pet names, I think depending on her partner’s personality they will change. But, for her she likes to be addressed with a familiarity that not many others get to have with her.  She quite likes the term “my love” or “love”, simple but easily clear about how you feel about her. In general I see this woman to really like giving her partner gifts- for me I hate receiving gifts outside of times when I expect to get them (my birthday, Christmas)- so if her partner likes gifts then that’s great, but if they’re more like me she would have to do a lot of adjusting to do She likes to impress the people she cares about- not in a self-conscious way, just in a way that makes her feel especially special in their eyes (she loves compliments as well, she runs off of them) She will let people in, but she is always weary. Constantly asking what they want, why they’re doing what they’re doing. What their intentions are, etc. And, eventually when her partner proceeds to impress her with the true intention to just get to know her better and be in her life, then she will allow herself to truly crack open And, this is the point where she is willing to accept constructive criticism, influence (for example, if her partner was a bit of a pacifist, she would slowly start being less and less brutal, more likely favoring diplomacy over war)

Alright, that’s it for now. Have a lovely day, loves. And, be sure to take care of yourselves and stay safe.

[the-flowerwolf]

Hogwarts legacy headcanons

While normal people go and socialize I wake up and think about ✨them✨

So there's some headcanons about my favourite Legacy Team (as I call them) for ya folks while I'm writing a really big fic about them. Careful, some of them are sad. And don't mind my poor grammar thanks.

Btw, collages are mine, feel free to use them💙

🐍Sebastian Sallow🐍

First off all, if you turn him in, I don't trust you

Literally a typical Slytherin

A nerd. Just a nerd.

Quidditch? Babe, the only sport for him is dueling

Felt absolutely helpless when his parents died. And that's why he's so protective. He just can't let anyone else die on his watch

Really is a small version of his father and proud of it

Believes that the end justifies the means

Hopeless flirt BUT a gentleman. Wouldn't do anything you don't like

And also most probably believes in true love

A proud bisexual

Everyone think that "he fucks everything that moves" but he's a virgin who "saves himself for the one and only"

As some fan said, he was probably born on 18th September. And it's a canon now.

A great friend but a terrible secret keeper, so for Merlin's sake, don't tell him ANYTHING

Knows how to braid hair into the most complex ways

Pro feminist! Treats women right and knows all important stuff thanks to his sis

🔥Natty Onai🔥

I'm sorry but she's so underrated and for what??

I believe she really respect traditions she were tought as a child

Her favourite holiday must be her birthday. All because it was the only day of the year when her parents forgot about all the dangers and sorrows and they just got together, spending the best time

Most probably will return to the homeland after Hogwarts

Is the only member of the team who play quidditch

(as a keeper ofc)

She's a lesbian idk dudes

A very honest girl who were raised to be a good person

So she just expects the same from others

A very competitive. But not like Imelda. Natty respects fair competition and knows how to honorably recognize a match

Although this does not mean that she will not destroy you to win

Is always cold poor thing

Religious bc I feel like it

Has mommy issues and don't tell me I'm wrong

Will definitely become the best auror one day

🌼Poppy Sweeting🌼

Her favourite holiday is Christmas lemme tell you that

Trust issues

She's trying her best to be gentle with every living being because she saw too much violence already

And that's why she thinks animals are better than people (agree)

She's definitely an INFP and I won't change my mind

Looks like a cinnamon roll but will kill you

A cliché but I feel like she's an excellent cook

Although she would LOVE to find someone to understand her (like us) she's totally okay with being on her own

Is into mind games like chess

But will go to see a quidditch game just to support Natty (and mc if they play)

Is always up to an adventure

Bullies? Girl grew up among killers, you really think she would care about some bullies?

I feel like she has the strongest personality in here. Doesn't matter what happens she will always stand straight while helping others

Is a cat person

Can't cry bc she was not allowed as a child

💚Ominis Gaunt💚

Just an innocent little boy let's be honest

He may look like he can kill you but he's just a cinnamon roll

Jokes about his blindness as a defence mechanism

Had a crush on both Sallow siblings at some point and I can't blame him

Saw a theory on tiktok that his patronus would be albino snake. CANON

Just wants to have a simple quiet life without any drama

Protective of his friends BUT is more protective of his boundaries

Don't mind his blindness he knows EXACTLY how to be a fashion icon

Another cliché: Omi can play piano

And it's the only thing his parents tought him that he loves. Playing helps him to calm down

Is very private, but as soon as he starts to trust you, he will immediately blurt out his life story, dreams, fears etc

Though he can't see an actual game, Omi likes to go on a quidditch game, because of the happy energy around him

Is sick most of the time for some reason. Cold, stomach ache or anything really

Also a nerd. But unlike Sebastian he's a fiction lover. Helps him to escape reality, especially in his family's house

Clingy with everyone he loves bc they make him feel safe

[masterthrutimenspace]

Been thinking a lot ab transfem 2012 leo lately,,,,​ :]

I love she. I like to think she secretly wears eye makeup under her mask while still in the closet. She's just happy to know she has it on even if no one else sees it. Sad that she can't put anything on her actual eyelids or she'll get caught :( so she just kinda puts it around her eyes. It still looks good when her eyes are open.

And she's actually like good at it too, making art on her face. She tries it once and suddenly it's her favorite past time hobby (even above Space Heroes), trying out different looks and styles. She searches up color theory and complexions and everything, though she has to learn a lot by herself since she has green skin. She's probably watched a thousand makeup videos. And she keeps this up for months without being caught, being the ninja that she is. It becomes so normal to her to the point that when her mask flies off during a fight with some bad guy she doesn't even realize how big a deal it is at first, lol.

After she does get found out she just says she likes makeup, not mentioning anything about being trans. April is ecstatic about Leo's hobby and buys her all kinds of makeup stuff like fake eyelashes, despite April herself not being that into makeup. Karai joins in too, teaching Leo some edgier looks. Sometimes they wear matching makeup.

Raph and Donnie are a bit weirded out at first but they can see this is, for some reason, important to Leo so they refrain from making any rude comments, even if just jokingly. Mikey loves it, he is fully supportive. Probably asks Leo to do his makeup once or twice. He is a bit jealous that Leo is trying to take his place as the cutest turtle though.

Raph appriciates the artsiness of it and the level of skill it would take to do that. He still thinks it's weird but he warms up to it.

Donnie does not at all get it but it makes his "brother" happy so it it what it is. And he will admit it is pretty cute.

Despite what everyone would have expected, Splinter doesn't make a big deal out of it. He just asks what the occasion is. Leo's new hobby doesn't get in the way of anything and it makes his "son" happy. He can also appriciate the time and effort of the craft. He'd probably be curious to know some of the techniques. Not for any purpose, just pure curiosity.

Casey would randomly walk into the lair one day and think Leo is some new sister of theirs. Which, technically he's not wrong. Leo is silently having a gender moment after Casey calls her a girl while Raph is laughing at Casey's confusion on the situation.

Casey doesn't know shit about makeup (me too fam) but he thinks it's badass that Leo is confidently wearing it. Screw toxic masculinity and all that shit. He goes on a random rant about his sister wanting to try makeup but thinking she's too young for that stuff (does she have a canon age? I imagine her being like 11). Leo tells him he should give his sister a chance to try it out, that it's just a fun activity and doesn't mean anything. Leo gives him like a whole lecture how makeup is about how it makes the person wearing it feel and not looking good for someone else. So Casey ends up deciding he's gonna give his sister some basic makeup stuff for her birthday (or Christmas, whichever comes first). Leo is satisfied.

Later that day Casey would ask Leo to help him decide what to give his sister and Leo is happy to help. What she doesn't expect though is for Casey to just straight up ask if she's trans. She panics. Casey panics at Leo's panic and splutters apologies for asking so suddenly, reassuring her that he's fully supportive if she is trans. So Leo comes out to him. And it feels nice. It's nice to have someone else know, to not carry it alone. Even though she was not at all prepared or ready to come out to anyone yet. She went to sleep feeling lighter that day.

[nattinatalia]

Jack Harlow x Reader : LIKE DADDY

“Baby, have you seen my chain?”

You walk into your shared closet and see your husband going through the jewelry cabinet. “Which one?”

“The one you gave me for our anniversary.” He bends down to look at another box. “I’m sure I placed it on the nightstand, but it’s not there and I can’t find it here.”

“Hmm, you probably misplaced it somewhere else. At the studio maybe?”

He groans “No I came home with it last night.”

You shrug, “I’ll help look downstairs, let me just check if the kids need anything.”

You walk out the door and towards the Children's room. You see your daughter Mia playing with her Fujifilm Instax camera her godfather gifted her for Christmas.

“No Ezequiel, you need to pose like daddy so you actually look like twins.” Mia tells him, her voice sounding like she's irritated.

“But mama said that’s not nice.”

“Mama is not here, you baby.”

“Mama is here young lady, what are you making your brother do?” You cross your arms and raise your eyebrows to look at her.

Mia looks like she just got caught doing a crime, but the thing is, she has the same sneaky smirk her father does when he gets caught doing something he’s not supposed to.

“He wanted to look like daddy.”

“Okay, and what was the not nice thing he had to do?”

Mia shakes her head.

You turn to look at your son. “Ezequiel?”

He was about to answer but Mia cut him off. “Fine, fine, I come clean. He was supposed to do the naughty fingers and hold his chain.” She shrugs.

“You know better than that Mia, no naughty fingers- wait, What chain?”

“He has daddy’s chain.”

You stand up straight and head towards your son. “Oh your dad is throwing a fit, he thought he lost it.” You pick up Ezequiel and have him in your arms. “Let’s go show daddy.”

“Can I come?” Mia asks.

You nod, “Of course baby, come on.” You hold out your hand so she can put hers in with you, and you three make it back upstairs.

“Babe.”

You hear noises from the bedroom, things being thrown all around.

“He’s mad mama?” Mia asks.

“No, he just really loves this chain.” You walk into your shared bedroom and see the bed is unmade, the side dressers are wide open.

“Jack.”

“What?” He’s on the floor looking under the bed. “Yeah sorry, what happened?” He says looking up and seeing you and the kids there, so he stands up and smiles.

“Daddy you made a big mess.” Mia says, looking around the room.

“Yeah, I’ll clean it up in a bit.”

“So I found your chain.” You tell him smiling.

“Fu-I mean duck yes, where was it?”

You walk up to him and hand him Ezequiel. “Your little twin.”

Jack looks down at EZ and smiles. “I should’ve asked him first huh?” You just smile.

“Daddy, Mia took pictures of me with your chain, we twins.”

“I bet she did an amazing job, I can’t wait to see them.” He looks at Mia and winks. “And you definitely are my twin little man.”

Ezequiel smiles at that.

“Now why don’t you all go downstairs, get some snacks ready and pick a movie to watch, while I clean up here?”

“Yes movie please.”

“I want Little Rascals.”

“I’ll help you bubs.” You say and start picking up.

“No, it’s okay, I need to make a call real quick anyway. You go downstairs with the kids, I got this.”

“Okay, if you’re sure.”

Jack nods, so you and the kids make it downstairs and fix up some snacks and look for a new movie to watch.

******

A few hours and some movies later, the doorbell rings.

“Are you expecting anyone?” You ask your husband.

He nods, “Actually, yes. But it’s just a drop off.” He says and gets up from the couch and heads towards the door.

“Who is it momma?” Mia asks.

“I don’t know bug, it's probably daddy’s work.”

Mia groans, “It’s our weekend. No work duties.”

“It’s not work baby, I promise.” Jack says as he comes back into the living room and sits down next to Ezequiel.

You look at the velvet box and raise your eyebrows. “Please tell me you didn’t.”

Jack smirks, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Jackman, he doesn’t need it.”

He shrugs, “Only when we’re home.”

You’re smiling at that. “Go on then, he’ll love it.”

“Mia, pass this to your mama please.” Jack hands her a box.

“Oh, for me?” You ask him, smiling.

“Mia, this is for you.” He hands her a smaller box. “And this one's for you Ez.” He hands him a box.

The three of you open the box and see there’s a matching chain with the one you had gifted Jack for your anniversary.

“Oh pretty.”

“Daddy we matching now, yay. Thank you.”

“Anything for you little man.” Jack tells him and helps him put it on.

Ezequiel immediately gets up from the couch and heads your way. “Look mama, I’m just like daddy.”

You smile, “Yeah you are buddy, twins for life.”

•••••••••

TAG LIST

@heavyhitterheaux

@harlowsbby

@arination99

@cmalass

@jackharloww

@minkookie95

@deannaard

@jacksmoviestar

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[multi-fandomsfreak]

Just wanted to put this in your head..

Imagine this video:

But instead of Xenophanes simping for Needlemouse he's simping for demon reader.  😏

Xenophanes simping over demon reader

Hey there! Thanks for the ask!

Thanks for feeding into my delusions lol. Really appreciate it. I already like Xeno enough and like to think he does this even though I know damn well he’ll probably do some stuff to me.

Also for now requests are closed. Mostly because it’s almost Christmas and I want to spend the time between now and then with my family. Anyways all aside hope you enjoy it reading this. ~Blaze/Dawn

Pronouns: Not Mentioned

Warning: ⚠️ Obsessive/Possessive behaviour + Murder⚠️

Requested: Yes/No

Characters: Xenophanes + Mentions of the EXE’s (Mostly Lord X and Fleetway)

Proofread: ❌

Credits: Art by komiplier on Twitter + Banner by 5macc13 on Pinterest

———————————

- Let me tell you when this man simps for you, he simps for you hard. Although he doesn’t admit it, he really likes you. He likes having your company, he likes it when you join him in whatever he is doing it gives him more joy than doing the thing by himself. He’s kind of gotten attached to you. Both emotionally and quite literally. He’s always seen around you, kind of like a bodyguard constantly keeping you to himself. Not letting anyone near you and if someone needs to speak to you he’ll be there standing right next to you.

- He definitely gets made fun of due to how much he likes you, mostly Lord x and Fleetway though. Lord X is a smug little shit once he finds out about Xeno’s little obsession over you he’s teasing the hell out of him. Making slight passive aggressive comments about his love for you at him and when he calls him out on it Lord X acts like he didn’t say anything wrong. Fleetway on the other hand oh he’s not even trying to hide that he’s teasing Xeno. In fact he indulges in the reactions that Xeno gives off, seeing him act like a child denying their crush makes him laugh. Fleetway may have hinted that Xeno simps for you directly but quickly gets shut down.

- He can get a little possessive around you. Well a little is an understatement for someone like him but regardless possessive. He has to be around you regardless of the situation. Yes he’s fully aware that you are a demon yourself and that you can and have dealt with some disturbing shit as well as causing some disturbing shit but is that going to stop him from acting like this? Nope it won’t. I’d suggest getting comfortable with his possessiveness because it really is something.

- With him being possessive he’s also very obsessed over you and sometimes fawns over you. Not in public though he’s not getting more embarrassed by the others than he already does. Don’t get me wrong he does show his appreciation in his own way just don’t expect to see like an exaggerated reaction. In private though, he’s completely different. If you so much as give him a compliment as soon as he’s alone and he knows that he is alone he could feel himself becoming slightly giddy. It’s like a fan who got recognised by their favourite artist. He does tell himself to not get too into his emotions but at the same time he can’t help but feel this way you do or say anything positive towards him. A simple praise like ‘good job’ is enough to make him feel like this.

- That’s just the tame stuff he does, don’t even get me started on what else he might do. Considering what and who he is I doubt that he won’t murder someone who gets close to you. If someone even dares to look at you or show interest in you he’ll make sure that they learn something and leave you alone. If he’s feeling nice enough he might let them live, not fully intact but being able to recover but most of the time he isn’t. It’s even worse if the person talks shit about you. He’ll make it worse for them.

- You’ve got him wrapped around your finger, congrats. You can basically make him do anything you want. No matter how extreme it might seem or see if you tell him to do it he will. Everyone definitely notices this because he doesn’t do the same to them. If they need something from him or need him to do something they immediately go to you and ask him to do it. Some of them only do this when they have to because they understand that it can be annoying when you're constantly being told to do something for them but for some of the others they tell you to ask him to do some embarrassing stuff and he’ll do it no doubt.

- Overall, for some reason you don’t question his behaviour. You know that sometimes Xeno can have some moments and despite things listed above he can be fun to hang around so you don’t really pay much attention to what he does.

———————————

[lonelychicago]

tagged by the lovelies @theplaceyoustillrememberdreaming @buddierights @hippolotamus @jesuisici33 @wikiangela 💌

you're a lost cause (but i'll always see great heights in you) | teen and up | 5.8k words

A small hiccup and another sniff. Chris pushes his shoulder impatiently and Eddie makes a sign with his hand for him to wait. "What's really going on, Buck? Is Natalia there with you?" There's a few beats of silence— Actually, Buck takes so long to answer that Eddie has to check the call didn't end. "Buck, buddy? Are you there?" "She broke up with me, Eddie. On Christmas Fucking Eve." Buck's small, broken voice comes through the line. "Who even does that?" or; buck gets dumped on christmas eve, eddie and chris are there to cheer him up and sometimes you realize you were too blind to see what was right in front of you all along. but the holidays are about presents under the tree, ugly sweaters, hot chocolate and new beginnings, right? it's never too late.

you could be the one that i love | general audiences | 4.9k words

Eddie is tired of being a repressed pining idiot. So he makes a plan. Is it a fool-proof plan? Not really. Is he panicking about it? Yes, absolutely. Did he pick probably the worst time ever to execute said plan? Also yes. But he's going through with it anyway. Go big or go home, right? "If you were the guy I was in love with, hypothetically of course," Eddie rushes to clarify. "What would you want me to give you? Hypothetically." or; Eddie asks Buck to help him choose a gift for a special someone.

may these memories break our fall | teen and up | 6.7k words

"Eddie. Fuck, I missed you so much." Buck presses his lips against Eddie's neck, kissing the delicate skin there. "So fucking much." He murmurs. There's a beat of silence and nothing happens. Eddie's tense and stiff in Buck's arms, not hugging him back and not saying anything. "Eddie?" Buck asks, hesitant as he pulls away. His hands rest on Eddie's shoulders and he looks him up and down one more time in case he's missed a big injury but all in all, apart from some bruises and dry blood on his forehead, Eddie looks pretty good considering he was just in a train crash. "Eddie, baby, are you okay?" Eddie frowns at him, his brown eyes looking at Buck in confusion and wariness. "Who are you?" His voice comes out hoarse and the words are slightly slurred together. Buck blinks and stares at his husband. A beat passes and he chuckles nervously. "What do you mean who am I?" "I, uh…" Eddie's frown deepens. "I don't know who you are." or: eddie is a soldier coming home for christmas, he wants to surprise his husband and son for the holiday but things don't go as planned.

oh baby, merry christmas ( where every wish comes true ) | general audiences | 2.3k words

Buck and Eddie take their kids to see Santa. They were not expecting for their kids to wish they would start dating. But Christmas is when every wish comes true. prompt: “we took our kids to santa’s workshop and they both wished we would get together”

tagging (no pressure): @watchyourbuck @monsterrae1 @eddiebabygirldiaz @exhuastedpigeon @hoodie-buck @honestlydarkprincess @maygrantgf @athenagranted @underwater-ninja-13 @prettyboybuckley @rogerzsteven @heartshapedvows @disasterbuckdiaz @messyhairdiaz @spaceprincessem @the-likesofus @spotsandsocks @jamespearce9-1-1 @housewifebuck @jeeyuns @malewifediaz @spagheddiediaz and anyone else who wants to do it!

[kyleraynermybeloved]

One Of A Kind -Chapter Three

Pairing: Kyle Rayner x Batsis!Reader Summary: Meeting a new friend and secrets being spilled is certainly one interesting way to spend a day. Warnings: Pregnancy, morning sickness, swearing, Christmas mention, fluff, slight angst Word Count: 4.7k A/N: The beginning is a mess but I hope y'all enjoy it! I'm going to pump out some more stuff before I go on vacation in August! OOAK Masterlist

“So, what originally brought you to our humble abode?” You placed the grocery bag on the counter in front of you. The three of you were still standing in the kitchen, a little closer now the initial shock washed over.

“You can thank this one over here. Left his comms on when once he came back, fortunately for him no one was listening, well besides from me. I caught everything up until you went deep into your history before the connection finally ended.” Guy sent a look to Kyle, shaking his head slowly. “Now, I figured I should probably meet this mystery person I’ve heard so very little about for myself. I was lucky you two live together, otherwise that would’ve made my trip a little harder.”

You let out a long sigh, mentally reminding yourself to have a talk with your apparent careless husband. “Okay, I can get behind that.”

Kyle sent a nervous look towards you, shuffling closer hesitantly. “Darling, honey pie, light of my life, you’re taking this all very calmly. Does that, perhaps, mean you’re not angry?”

“Oh, I’m furious with you,” You tried to keep your voice steady as you moved away from his reach. His face dropped slightly at the motion. “But I’ve also kept things from you that I should have told you sooner, so I guess this puts us on some slight even footing. And just so you know, this does not mean you’re in the clear. This is my life you had been reckless with, the life I tried so hard to keep safe. If this was anyone else, we both would be in more danger than you know.”

Tears were pricking your eyes and the nausea was setting in, your stomach fluttered as the rush of emotions became overwhelming. “Now if you excuse me, I’m going to go throw up and when I come back I expect the both of you to be ready to leave for lunch. This is non negotiable.”

You turned on your heel and dashed to the guest bathroom, slamming the door shut as you barely made it to the toilet before the contents of your stomach spilled out. You whimpered as the heaving became too much all too quickly. Resting your forehead against the cool seat felt heavenly for your heated skin, waiting for the next wave to come. Fortunately it never came. The room no longer felt like it was spinning so that was a win.

After a few beats nothing else came up, the queasiness had eased up some.

The knock on the door startled you. You called out weakly for them to come in, you were taking your chances on it being Kyle since Guy had looked like he wanted the Earth to swallow him up whole when you left.

The door opened and you were met with the familiar green eyes you’ve come to long for and love. His face was stoic but quickly softened at your crumpled figure.

“How are you feeling?” Kyle spoke softly, kneeling down, gently rubbing your back.

“Like shit,” you said flatly, leaning into him with a grumble. “I think this week takes the cake of being terrible. It feels infinitely worse than the weeks before. I don’t understand how someone can be this sick during every waking moment of the day?”

“Do you want to stay home for lunch then? I could send Guy out.” He suggested.

You hummed, doing a mental check of your physical state. “No, I think it would be better to go out. I’m going to feel sick regardless so might as well make the most of it.”

“Okay,” He blinked, eyes filled with emotion. You could tell he wanted to say something so you sat patiently for him until he was ready. With a sigh he continued, “I’m sorry I wasn’t careful. I was just so focused on getting to you before anything terrible happened, the last time you had gotten sick I almost lost my mind when you had to be hospitalized. Honestly, I couldn’t handle another repeat.”

You turned in his arms, pulling him close in a hug, his arms wrapped tightly around you as if afraid you would crumble if he let go. “My love, listen to me. It's okay. I turned out okay in the end. More than okay, really. And before you say anything, you already know I would do everything in my power to not let that happen again, especially to you. I made a promise that day at our wedding I would never leave you, that no matter what we’ll always have each other.”

“But I could have put your life at risk. I should have known better. If something were to happen to you- gods, and the baby! If something happened to the both of you I could not forgive myself. I’m sorry I did that to you both.” Kyle croaked out. Your heart nearly broke at the sound.

You knew where this was stemming from, had been there to pick up the pieces that were threatening to shatter completely, caring for a nearly broken man trying so desperately to stay afloat. How one man could deal with all that trauma and still manage to smile and care for you every single day, you didn’t know. You were glad you were there in time before it became too much for him. Had been alongside him to mourn the loved ones he had lost.

“Look at me,” You pulled back to cradle his face in your hands, thumbs brushing over his cheeks, his hands found your hips. “I’m not gonna lie, I was more than scared when I found out the comms had been left on. But it appears that luck was on our side since it was your best friend who was on the other side, a person who I trust by the way.” You said with certainty. “That being said, I know with my whole being and soul that you would never mean harm to either of us. I trust you completely. So don’t get lost in that wonderful, beautiful head of yours.”

“Thank you.” Kyle smiled. You could see thoughts were still swirling in his head, you know this conversation would be continued once you had no more guests.

During that time you pulled him in to give a peck on his nose, which he wrinkled in a grimace. “And as much as I love you, I’m asking you politely to rinse your mouth. Your breath is gnarly.”

You let go with a laugh, smacking his arm. “You ass!”

“Get washed up, lovey.” He placed a kiss on the crown of your head and got up, helping you in the process as well. “We’ll continue this later, let’s get back to our guest who’s awkwardly waiting for us.”

“Oh yeah, I don’t think I made such a good impression. Go ask what he’s feeling on eating, I won’t be more than a few minutes.”

He left with a small pat on your butt. Remembering what a coworker once said about not brushing your teeth after throwing up because it grinds the acid into your teeth, you rinsed thoroughly with water followed by mouthwash. Doing another rinse of both you figured you could do a quick brush now.

It probably wasn’t the best idea but at least the mint flavor replaced the offensive one that had been left in your mouth. It also helped ease the sick feeling that clung desperately to you.

The boys had picked a place nearby the apartment to walk to, they had been chatting your ear the entire way there. Of course, you wished you had offered to drive since the weather had gotten worse, the snow now in huge piles on the sidewalk making you put in more effort than needed to trudge through it.

Thinking about it now, there are only three more weeks until Christmas comes. You had forgotten all about it, too caught up with work to begin shopping. You’ll have to find a day when Kyle was out to go get gifts.

Not wanting to chance it again when you had been called in three days before the holiday last year, the two of you hadn't made any plans ahead of time, not sure if there'd be any last minute assignments given.

The diner had been tucked away towards the end of the block, it was small and gave off a warm, cozy vibe. You picked a booth in a corner, away from the windows with you near the wall and Kyle at the end, Guy sat across from the two of you.

You were trying to decide on getting either soup or sandwich for the better half of ten minutes, your efforts on choosing one was futile because you ended up ordering both

It was Guy who pulled you out of your thoughts. “I’m curious to know how he managed to score a date with you.”

With a mischievous glint in your eyes, Kyle knew what you were going to say first.

“He managed to spill his coffee all down my shirt.” You said with a shake of your head, forcing off a smile to feign the look of disappointment.

“There’s no way he did that, holy shit! And you still gave him the time of day?”

“Well, I was the one who actually asked him out. He was too shocked by what had happened, it was really cute. I like to think he fell for my charm, pun intended.” You laughed.

Kyle let out a groan, hiding his face in his hands clearly embarrassed. Guy groaned at your awful pun, if you could even call it that. But you were very pleased with their reactions.

The full brunt of nausea had returned when the food arrived but you managed to push it down and force food into you so you at least had something in your system. Kyle glanced your way, noticing the change in your demeanor and took your hand in his, rubbing comforting circles onto the back of yours.

“We went out for a date the week after the first, which turned into having dates once a week, which turned into two dates a week after a month, and then three dates a week. Eventually he wouldn’t dare part with me.” You said between bites.

“We've been together for five years now, going on six real soon.” Kyle continued. You hummed, leaning into his shoulder.

 “The first three years we dated, it was interesting to see how it lasted since I was going on and off world for most of the beginning. Coming clean to her helped tremendously,” Kyle noted happily. “And these last two years have been amazing since we married.” The pure joy was evident in his voice.

“What’d you think when he kept leaving in the beginning?” Guy asked you, clearly interested in your thoughts.

“It wasn't as noticeable to me because I travel a lot for work. We were lucky I had that week off, otherwise I don't think none of this would have happened. But his cute charms and loving personality made it worth it.”

“Gross.” Guy faked gagging. “What do you do for work that keeps you traveling?” 

You had been expecting that question to come up. But you wished it had come up later. Looking at Kyle who shrugged, suggesting it was your decision to tell him the truth. You decided on something in the middle.

“I work for a security company, traveling wherever I'm needed to provide my services.” It wasn't the whole truth but it also wasn't completely a lie.

Guy seemed pretty surprised at your job, not expecting that from the cozy nature of your look. “That's pretty neat. Do you stay in the country or do you also travel internationally?”

“Most of the time it's international but the most recent trip was actually here on the east coast. I was happy with the lack of jet lag that accompanies my trips.”

The three of you let the conversation die down to eat your food. The faint music playing from the speakers added to the comfortable atmosphere. It felt like you were catching up with lifelong friends rather than meeting up with your husband's brother for the first time.

“Not to bring up the elephant in the room but does Bats know about you two being together?” Guy asked wearily, looking back and forth at the two of you.

You tensed at the question, shifting uncomfortably in your seat, suddenly more interested in shoving your food around, no longer with an appetite.

“Actually, no.” Kyle coughed. “As far as I’m aware, they don’t know about us.”

“They don’t.” You confirmed coldly.

The air became thick at your tone, sensing this was a topic you did not want to talk about, Guy quickly changed the subject.

“Uhm… Have you guys got anything for the tiny lantern?”

Like a switch had gone off in your brain, your body relaxed against the seat, a soft smile on your face upon hearing the name.

“Tiny Lantern?” You asked.

“Y-yeah. The kid is gonna be a lantern if I have any say. Ring or not, we’re family.”

“Oh, fuck I think I’m going to cry thats so sweet!” The overwhelming emotions began pouring out, tears streaming down your face.

“Wait, no! Don’t cry!” He panicked and looked at Kyle for help, who was equally as flustered and confused as he was.

A small sob came out, you gulped down your water trying to stop the tears from continuing. You really didn’t know why it affected you like this, you were normally amazing at keeping your emotions in check. That’s a lie, you knew exactly why.

“It’s not that, it’s the hormones.” Wiping your tear stained face you sucked in a deep breath hoping to calm down. “Don’t worry about it, I'm fine. They’re happy tears, you didn’t do anything wrong.”

Kyle gave your hand a squeeze, comforting you and turned towards his friend with a smile. That seemed to relieve him. “To answer the question, no, we haven't gotten around to any shopping yet. Well, apart from the prenatals and vitamins she needs to take now. I think that had been our next stop once we dropped off the supplies at the apartment.”

Your breathing had evened out, no longer crying. It was a little embarrassing but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care, your energy now low. That seemed to be another lovely symptom you’ve acquired in the past month, remembering how you felt after your last mission.

“Maybe after a nap?” You suggested with a yawn. “Or perhaps you two could go while I nap?” You were exhausted, possibly due to the whiplash of emotions during the entire time here.

“Of course, let me pay and get some containers for us. I’ll be right back.” Kyle scooted out of the seat and walked to the counter.

The both of you kept quiet, not really sure on what to say.

You broke the silence, “I want to say that I’m normally not like this. I’m usually much calmer, not really a crier.” Not sure why you felt the need to explain yourself but continued. “Sorry I scared you earlier, it’s been a pretty harsh week for me.”

His face faltered for a moment, “Somehow, I don’t doubt that. I apologize for bringing up an unwanted past. I don’t know how long it’s been since you last saw your family but they’re different now, if it makes any difference.”

You sent him a knowing look. Of course you know how your family is doing, you’ve kept daily tabs on them since you left the manor that day.

It was one of the conditions of your new life and job that your boss let you have complete access to anything regarding them. Both in and out of the mask, although you're the only one with access to that knowledge.

“The things Kyle told me about you when you were in the bathroom makes you out to be a strong and loving woman. I don’t doubt that one bit. You’re good for him, he’s much happier than before and I know it’s thanks to you.” Guy sat back in his seat, sent a warm look to Kyle and turned back to you.

Your heart warmed and you felt lighter. Like a tension had been released from your shoulders. Looking into his eyes you only saw comfort and admiration shining through.

“Thank you, I know you mean so much to him too. I’ve heard and seen the way you treat each other like family, it’s of great importance to me having you out there with him keeping each other safe. Just know you’re always welcome to stop by, whether that be for him or to crash. The door is always open for you.”

There was a faint blush that crept up his neck. “Thank you, that means a lot coming from you.”

“Any time, although I do have one request… actually two requests for you.” He motioned for you to go on. “First, if you could keep us, me and the baby, a secret from the others, just until we’re ready.”

“That’s understandable, don't even have to ask.” He smiled.

“You might want some background information for the second favor. I have this friend of mine, a kid that I look after whenever he’s in town, actually his entire family are friends of mine.” You rambled on, taking a moment to breathe. “Anyways, he crashes with us from time to time, but is a little weary of strangers. So, whenever you’re here around the same time as him, if you could possibly ease up and maybe… give him space. Just so he doesn’t freak out.”

“That’s certainly something.” He chuckled. “But I’ll be on my best behavior, since you asked so nicely.”

Wishing you could believe it you knew better than to hope for a miracle. You knew with the two of them together they'd end up destroying the whole apartment complex. Billy had confided in you that you Rayners and his family are the only people who know about his identity, but that doesn't mean he'd stop being his chaotic smack-talking self around Guy. The less they interact with each other the safer your home will be.

Kyle came back with a few containers and you all quickly filled them before heading out, you hailing a taxi to avoid the cold before the two could oppose.

*****

You woke up much later in the day, the sky was dark but that was expected in the winter. The smell of food welcomed you, no longer feeling sick for the time being although you knew it would be a matter of time before it returned.

Making your way out of the bedroom there were bags littered along the hallway, leading to the living room where you found Kyle and Guy sitting on the floor reading instructions with parts on the floor in front of them

“Aren’t you two a sight for sore eyes.” Their heads shot up in your direction, surprised at your arrival.

“Hey sleeps, you’re up! There’s a dinner plate on the counter for you,” Kyle nodded towards the kitchen counter where there was a steaming plate of food.

You crossed the room grabbing the plate and walked back sitting on the couch closest to Kyle, judging by all the pans on the stove top he made dinner for all of you. He gave your calf a quick squeeze for his own comfort, fingers lingering.

“What are you two building?” You asked in between bites.

It could have literally been anything. The random parts on the floor didn’t give you any clues at all, whatever container they had been in was gone as well. Kyle and Guy shared a look, having a silent conversation while you ate, looking between the two of them perfectly content on waiting them out.

Guy spoke first, “It was supposed to be a surprise for when you woke up, a gift for the tiny lantern.”

“It’s a crib for our little bean,” Kyle continued eagerly with a grin. “It’s the same one you were looking at online, you’d mentioned wanting it and I thought we might as well get it now.”

Looking over at the parts in front of you it slowly clicked together. It should have been obvious from the start but your sleepy baby brain hadn’t booted up when you had looked at the familiar soft gray pieces all laid out for them.

“You do know we still have like another seven months until our bean joins us, right?” You asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Yeah, but I was a little eager and Guy suggested it was a good idea to get started with the big stuff early on rather than wait until you’re farther along.”

Guy held up his hands, “Woah! I didn’t do anything, you’re just easily suggestible.”

“No, you’re the one who put the idea in my head.” Kyle bickered back.

You chuckled into your food. Kyle smiled up at you before turning his attention back to Guy who was smirking at him. It was obvious to Guy that you and Kyle were completely in love with each other, he was glad his best friend was happy.

“Well, thank you both for the amazing gift. The only thing we need to do besides building this is to figure out where we’re going to put it.” You said.

“Are you not turning the guest room into the nursery?” Guy asked you both.

You shrugged, “We only found out three days ago we’re expecting so we hadn’t really thought that far ahead. I mean it would be smart to do that but what about when we have guests staying over?”

“Maybe we could let our little bean stay in our room with us so they’re within reach, and we keep the guest room as is, at least for now.” Kyle suggested.

“I think you might need to invest in a larger home, this apartment is gonna get cramped real soon. You have some time to decide but don’t put it off at the last minute.” Guy piped in.

“It honestly wouldn’t be a terrible idea to get a bigger place,” you agreed. “We do have a stable and good enough income to go looking. Alright then. I’ll leave you two to build, I have maternity shopping to do.” You got up and loaded your plate into the dishwasher.  “Babe, do you know where my laptop is? I think I misplaced it again, I couldn’t find it when we got back from lunch.”

He mumbled instructions to Guy then turned to answer you. “Yeah, the rascal asked if he could use it for the weekend to do a school report so I dropped it off. You can use mine, it should still be charging on my bedside table.”

Of course your unofficial son was borrowing your laptop, this shouldn’t be news to you. You did your best not to trip on all the bags that were still placed around the hallway floor, making a mental note to inspect their contents later. 

For the time being you made yourself comfy on the bed with the laptop in your lap, you had some shopping to do since it was getting more difficult to squeeze into some of your clothes. Everything was slightly snugger than they normally were but in due time nothing would fit.

Time must have flown by quickly because a very exhausted looking Kyle walked in, shutting the door quietly behind him. You weren’t sure if it was the pregnancy spurring on your feelings but he looked downright beautiful. His hair was a tousled mess, half-lidded eyes struggled to stay open, and his pout was too cute. “Were you able to find anything good and comfortable? Should I be worried about fighting off wandering eyes when you look gorgeous in whatever outfits you got yourself?”

“Only found a few things but since I have no clue what I’m doing I bought them in different sizes and I’ll return whatever doesn’t work. As for fighting off others, I’ll handle that myself but you can do as you please,” you closed the laptop as Kyle got on his side of the bed, setting it aside and gave him your undivided attention. “So… are we good to talk about it? Our situation.”

“If you’re asking if the walls have ears, no– we’re good. Guy barely made it to the spare room before he passed out. Damn crib took all our energy. It was impossible to put together.”

You let out a laugh scooting closer to Kyle, he pulled you both down so you were laying down with your back to his front where he could easily wrap his arms around you. He let his fingers rub away any lingering discomfort that came with the stressful day.

“I want to start off by apologizing for not telling you about my past sooner. I mean, we’ve been married for years now and the only thing I told you was that I had left my old life behind and took up hiding behind this new person I created. It wasn’t right nor was it fair of me to do that while you gave me everything and more.” You sighed, placing your own hands on top of his.

“Believe me when I say I knew what I was getting into when I decided to marry you. Your job alone requires you to erase your existence both in the virtual and physical world, it’s a miracle we ran into each other when we did otherwise I wouldn’t have the love of my life in my arms right now,” Kyle gave you a gentle squeeze. “You can say I don’t know anything about your past but don’t you dare say I don’t know anything about you. I know your favorite color and how you try to keep something on you that closely matches it.

“I know your eyes light up whenever you get to a good part in a book. I know how after a bad day of work you love it when I get a bath ready and have dinner prepared so all you have to do is wind down and relax. And I know that when I get too overwhelmed and start panicking you’re always there to bring me back to reality and calm me down– how you’ll drop everything to come to me to do it. These are all the little things that piece you together, the only things that matter. I don’t care that you hid that part of you but I would love nothing more than to learn about it when you’re ready and when you’re willing.”

It was incredibly hard to keep the tears back but your sniffling gave you away. There was no one more understanding and kind than your husband and it broke your heart you never had the guts to completely spill all your secrets to him. He had all your trust, love, and support and you hoped he felt the same.

“Have I told you how much I love you?” You turned your head and kissed him.

“I don’t believe you have, maybe I could do with some reminders.” Kyle gave you another peck when you pulled away.

You both stayed silent for a moment, soaking in each other’s presence and warmth. You might have thought Kyle fell asleep if it wasn’t for the long yawn coming from him.

“Babe?” you whispered and waited for a response before continuing. “Guy is right. We’re going to need to find a bigger place, it might be time to start looking into some houses. Get a nice place to stretch our legs, lord knows we’re going to need the extra room once our little bean is here and the Marvel gang makes it their life mission to help out.”

“Okay, we can start looking tomorrow– after we get some rest.”

You eased out of his arms to turn off the lamp and he immediately pulled you back to him when you were done. “Alright, tomorrow then. Good night, I love you.”

“I love you too, sleep well.”

Now, with the heavy weight off your chest you were able to fall asleep without a problem for the first time in a long time.

[codfanficedits]

Christmas - Part 2/4

Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader

Summary: Simon during Christmas :)

Wordcount: 2127 | Rating: E! (18+ only!)

Warnings: A little bit hinting to NSFW, I think? A lot of fluff :)

A/N: I said what I said.

He used to hate the holidays, but by the Gods did that change when he met you. You felt like a gift from the heavens above, slowly introducing him to the warmth that could be, and for the first time since years, did Simon start to love the holidays.

Unfortunately, does the army wait for no one. And right before he was supposed to be home, he got sent on a mission again, leaving him without a way to communicate with you.

Luckely for him, it was a short, easy mission, leaving him with some spare time to buy you something before he got back. He always adored giving you things. A little way of marking you as his, making it known to others that you were off the market.

He was a little too eager when he swung open the door of your house, kicking off his boots almost immediately.

"Hi, lovie," he mumbled exhausted. One of his hands slipped into his pocket, pulling out a small, black box. "Early present for you."

You had not expected him to be home again, you was more worried that he was killed in action, and there he was, exhausted as could be, but alive.

"Oh lovie." You sighed as you hugged him tight, burying your face in the crook of his neck, a content sigh leaving your lips.

You pulled back to look at him, a smile on your face, your hair tickling his arm. You took the little box from him, opening it eagerly.

"Simon!" You had been eyeing this ankle bracelet for a while, and he must've known it. "This must've costed you a fortune!" You exclaimed, seeing it had this initial on it, a little S dangling off it.

He hugged back with a groan, wrapping his arms around your tightly. The love he felt for his person was unmatched by anyone or anything. No matter how hard things got, these rare moments of comfort made his entire being come back to life and feel like things were going to be okay. You made his heart race in ways you'd never know.

"I'm here." He whispered in your ear, a low sigh escaping his lips before he kissed your forehead. He was relieved you wasn't annoyed with his sudden, early return. “It didn’t cost a fortune.” He groaned. “It will look nice when your ankles rest on my shoulders.” He chuckled.

"I'm so glad you are." You murmured softly when he kissed your forehead. "I was so worried something had happened."

You pressed a kiss on his cheek. "Do you want to stay in for Christmas? Or do you want to go to a dinner party or something?" You knew how much he valued his time, so you would gladly give him the choice.

Another low sigh escaped his lips as you kissed his cheek, his tired body leaning into the light affection you gave him. He let his eyes close for a moment but opened them when you asked a question.

He considered the options. "I'm pretty tired, honestly," he mumbled, leaning his head against yours. He wanted nothing more than to simply feel your presence by him.

"Then we're staying at home." You smiled. "I haven't seen you in a few months. And I would rather be with you than anywhere else."

"I can run you a bath, when it is Christmas I'll make some dinner." You mused. "Sounds like a good plan to me."

That was his ideal Christmas holiday. Spend it comfortably with his partner. No parties, no socializing with people you didn't know.

"That's perfect," he mumbled. A bath would feel great right now; his bones felt like they were going to break as soon as he let his guard down. "You can spoil me for the day," he said, his face lighting up now that he knew you’d be staying home.

"You would like that, wouldn't you." You teased him. You gave him a playful slap on his ass. "Let’s get your stinky ass in a bath." You grinned, as you kissed his cheek again.

You walked in front of him, placing the ankle bracelet on your nightstand before you went to the bathroom with him, it was a gorgeous gift, and you loved how he paid attention to what you wanted.

Simon laughed softly when you gave his ass that playful slap, his muscles clenching from the unexpected touch. It might not seem like much to others, but those little acts of affection were everything to him.

He followed behind, his steps slower than usual. Exhaustion weighed down his body, making him feel almost drunk. His muscles ached in the worst way possible. However, the bath was everything he needed to fix that.

"I hate to ask...can you help me wash?" He couldn't help but ask, the weariness showing itself in his voice.

You loved it, and he wouldn't know how happy it was making you, Simon always wanted to care for you, for others.

"Of course, lovie." You said with a smile, as you helped him undress.

You could see how tired he was, exhaustion from being a soldier oozing out of him. He leaned on you, and you knew this was all he needed.

It was almost ironic how he, a man of his physique and stature, was relying on his partner to help him with a simple, everyday task. It was almost funny how he was acting so pitiful; the man who usually carried the team's equipment was now having his clothes stripped from him.

Still, the simple act of you helping him made him feel closer to you and made him feel taken care of. It almost put tears in his eyes, but he was too tired to display such emotion. All he could do was lean against you and simply let you do your thing.

You didn't mind, not at all, you had leaned on him plenty of times, and you loved that you could return the favour.

You rinsed him first under the shower, getting rid of most of the dirt and grime, before you guided him to the bathtub. You let it fill up with warm water, before you leaned in to kiss him, helping him step into the water.

"There ya go."

Simon sighed contently as he felt the warm water against his skin, his muscles no longer hurting quite as badly as they were. The stress and tension just melted away. He let his eyes close again, leaning against you. You were doing him such an act of kindness. He hadn't been this relaxed in so long, the last few months being nothing but an endurance test.

"I could kiss you so many times right now," he mumbled with fatigue, his voice raspy and low from disuse.

"You're too tired to kiss me." You teased him. You took some shampoo, your shampoo, the nice, expensive one, and you lathered it in your hands. You took place behind him, softly massaging his scalp with the shampoo.

"I'm too tired to function right now," he groaned. Still, that didn't stop his body from reacting to your touch. Your hands felt like they were melting away all of the tension in his muscles, the scent of the shampoo being a bonus.

It wasn't long before his eyes closed and his breathing slowed, the last few drops of adrenaline leaving his body as he relaxed completely. It always baffled him how you made things so easy and simple, taking care of him and making his life better than it had ever been.

You used the shower head to rinse out the shampoo from his hair.

After that, you used your bodywash to lather your hands again, softly massaging his shoulders with the soap. Any other day you would’ve joined him, teased him in the bath until he dragged you to the bedroom. But you could see he was too tired, too exhausted and he needed a break.

"I love you." You whispered softly.

Simon let out a relaxing moan when you massaged his shoulders, the tension leaving his body more with each slow touch. He almost couldn't believe he was still on earth. Things were going too perfectly.

"I love you too," he murmured, and that was the truth. It was no longer butterflies in his stomach when he was by your side. Now it was warmth, security, and a sense of overwhelming belongingness.

It had been the same for you. You didn't get butterflies when you saw him, unless he was all dressed up, or bone naked, but he made you feel at home, he made you feel like you belonged in the world.

You work your thumbs into the tired muscles of your lover.

"Nearly done, my love." You murmured softly. "I'll dry you off once we're done."

Your touch felt like a comforting, calming blanket being draped over him. Every ounce of stress and tension was releasing. It was like being back in your arms after a long day, his body getting the much needed attention it deserved. He was already ready to nap once this was over.

"Thank you..." He mumbled, feeling like he should be doing more in this relationship, rather than simply accepting your care and love. Oh but he was doing so much more than he gave himself credit for. He loved you unconditionally and that was the best thing he could do.

You emptied the bath, helping him getting out of the tub, after that you took the fluffiest towel you could find, slowly drying him off.

"Let’s get you to bed, Si."

Simon smiled and closed his eyes again, appreciating how the towel felt against him. It was so soft and warm. Like a hug.

"I'm not being too demanding, am I?" He mumbled softly. The last thing he wanted to do was be a handful to take care of. But with how exhausted he was, it was hard not to melt into the towel and simply relax.

"Demanding?" You repeated. "You're anything but demanding."

A soft kiss is pressed on his chest. "I would do anything for you. This is nothing." You reassured him.

You took his hand, guiding him and his naked body to your bedroom.

You took off your jeans and socks before you got into bed yourself, and before you could say or do anything he was between your legs, his arms around your waist, his head resting on your lap.

Simon's mind went fuzzy at your reassurance and affection. Was he really this loved? Could he have done anything worthy of such unwavering devotion?

He was the one who should have been doing more for you, not the other way around. Yet you still took care of him, took care of everything. Even when he was acting so pitiful and incapable of doing the simplest tasks.

His body reacted appropriately to your warmth; his arms wrapped around your, his muscles tightening as he clung to you.

You took your book from the nightstand, running your free hand through his hair as you let out a content sigh. He was home, and that was all you could ask for.

“What are you reading?” Simon muttered softly, while he tried to keep his eyes open. “Haunting Adeline, it is quite good.”

Simon perks up. “Are you out of your mi-“ He chuckles when he sees a different cover and he let’s himself sink into your lap again. “I nearly went off on you, you idiot.” He scolded you, lovingly of course.

“How do you even know it?” You muse, your hand running through his hair again.

Simon closes his eyes once more. “Soap bought it to impress a woman he had been dating. The idiot read it out loud to us, before we would go to sleep. He tossed it out really quick when we realised it was glorifying sexual assault and Zade was nothing more than a rapist.”

“Soap did good with that one.” You chuckle. “Tried to read it, had to put it down because I was so disturbed.”

“Hmm.” Simon mumbles as he feels the sleep wash over him. “Tonight I want you to read for me.”

"Merry early Christmas, lovie." You whispered, not sure if he would hear you. "Couldn't wish for a better gift."

The heat of your body was so blissful. The comfort that came from just lying with you was unlike any other experience Simon had ever had. When you were close like this, in a bed, he had no urge to protect his surroundings. He was at ease, his heart beating slower from the sheer joy he felt.

"Merry Christmas," he whispered back, drifting into the most restful sleep he's had in months.

[giggly-squiggily]

Ahh, does it make me cringefail if i talk about Franky twice in a row? Can you blame me? (You don't gotta write anything if you don't wanna! Just figured since we're sharing and all.... (ノ´∀｀*))

Considering his history with finding a partner, once he (somehow) sweeps [Y/N] off their feet, you bet he's gonna be boasting about it! EVERYONE is hearing about how awesome his partner is, how sweet they are, how skilled they are, etc etc..

ESPECIALLY Loid.

He tries to make it a competition between the two of them against Loid and Yor, but nobody else in either party really cares...

~💫Forgetful Anon (i guess we're sticking with that!)

(Headcanons to Dabbles: OFFICIALLY CLOSED)

Forgetful, my friend, my ally, my Franky-centric dabbler who brings me and the Fuzz so much joy; you are the farthest thing from cringe and this HC is truly precious! I love Franky both being so stupid in love and also just ridiculous it's a hilarious combo and I'm happy! I've gotcha covered! :D

“Hey there, Forgers! Have you met (Y/N)- wait, of course you have! They’re my partner now!” Your boyfriend announced with such glee- like a child who got their dream toy on Christmas morning. It was utterly adorable, if not a bit embarrassing.

“Yes, Franky. You’ve told us that- repeatedly.” Loid tsked with a small sigh, no real malice in his voice as he gave you a smile. “It’s always a pleasure to see you, (Y/N). I hope the trip here wasn’t too bad in this weather.”

“Oh no, it wasn’t bad at all! I’m used to this kind of thing.” You laughed as Anya ran over, taking your hand and bringing you to Yor. The three of you went about to the living room as Franky puffed his chest with pride.

“Aren’t they just amazing? Tough as nails, but sweet as candy! How’d I get so lucky to meet them?”

“Through me. And the agency.” Loid reminded, softening as he watched the informant swoon, head over heels in love. “You really do like them, huh?”

“Like? I’m so in love, Loid! I’ve never met anyone like them! They’re talented and smart and considerate of my time-” He paused briefly on that one, side eyeing Loid before continuing. “They always make me feel like I’m important, even when their plate is full.” He leaned in his arm as he watched you chat with Yor and Anya, laughing and smiling without a care in the world. “I owe you one.”

“You really don’t. I didn’t expect this to happen, but I’m happy for you both. Truly.” Franky eyed him suspiciously, but found no lie. He smiled after, lightly punching Loid’s arm.

“Say- we should do a double date soon. Maybe I can teach you the ropes on how to properly woo your lover~”

“No thanks.”

“Come on, I’m basically an expert on romancing people now!”

“You really aren’t, and I think I’m doing just fine with that.”

“I-” Franky raised his brows, not expecting that. Loid seemed to stiffen at the accidental confession. “No way, you’re-”

“Fuzzy head! Papa! Come play with us!” Anya’s cries of joy reached out to them, a pack of Bondman playing cards in her hands. “(Y/N) brought me a present!”

“We’re gonna play old Bondman! Is-is that what it’s called?” Yor asked as you grinned, lifting a shoulder.

“Sure- let’s go with that. Franky, you’re on my team.”

“Be right there, gorgeous! Winning couple reigns supreme!” He cried, laughing like a gremlin as he ran over. Loid shook his head with weary amusement, joining the party as Franky kissed your cheek.

He might be a bit of a show boater with this kind of thing, but his feelings were true. Franky clearly loved you, and to Loid; that was worth putting up with his informant’s antics.

[tmnt-obsessed]

Amnesiac Patient: Chapter 1 | Bay!Donatello x Fem!Reader

Okie this is going to be my first series! Yay!! I hope everyone is just as excited for this journey as I am! This has not been proofread, don't come at me.

Warnings: Talk of marijuana, hinting of kidnapping and human trafficking, severe injuries

~

You glanced at the time on your cell phone, chewing at your lip as you looked back up at the very dark parking lot of your shit job. You suddenly wished you had a backbone to tell your coworker that no, you were not “cool with closing for him”. Especially since you knew he was just going to smoke some of the “devil’s lettuce” with his friends and not be there for his sister who was “giving birth like right now.” How? You may have overheard -eavesdropped- in on that call with said friends not even ten minutes prior. Thinking back, does he even have a sister?

No, that's hardly important. You’ve dug your grave already and now you must lay in it. Man, is it difficult though. The dark creeping at the edges of what light is illuminating from the old shitty LED light poles of the parking lot is already making you feel uneasy and a bit queasy if you’re being honest.  

How are you expected to walk home when you don’t even want to walk across the parking lot? You steal your nerves, carefully fitting what keys you do have on your keyring between your fingers and slipping the other hand in your bag to fiddle with the small, bedazzled can of pepper spray your mom gave you for Christmas “just in case”, and begin your trek home. 

You can feel your nerves fraying with each step, constantly on the lookout for anything odd or out of the ordinary. Being extra cautious around alley entrances, and crossing the street when anyone threatens your path. Other women be damned! You heard stories of some luring other women into traps. You aren’t taking any chances.

You’re rounding out around a particular alley entrance; ensuring there is space between you and a potential criminal if they were to be lurking within. Pausing when you see a figure laying on the ground, unmoving. It’s.. kind of human shaped? Honestly it’s hard to see anything from where you are standing in the warm glow of a street lamp. The dark of the alley way twisting your gut uncomfortably. 

You’ve heard of this too. People pretending to be hurt in order to lure kind, empathetic dumb girls into traps… 

Girls like you unfortunately. Your heart is far too big for your body, therefore making a home on your sleeve instead. You know better, in fact everything in you is screaming in you to just run, but that small voice in the back of your head whispers “But what if they die when you could have helped them? Can you live with yourself if they die when you could have done something?”

No, you could not live with yourself knowing you left someone to die. You would feel as if you killed them.

Gripping your pepper spray a bit tighter, you step closer to the alley and further from the false safety of the street light.

“Um.. are you alright?” You hesitantly call out. Chewing on your lip when there is no response. 

You really shouldn’t be doing this.. But you're stepping further into the alleyway, your gut really churring when you realize you’re completely surrounded by the dark. Gripping the pepper spray so tight you just know you’re going to have dozens of gem shaped indents in your hand for a few minutes once you actually let go. 

Creeping closer to the person, but.. the closer you get the less human they look. In fact if you didn’t know any better you’d say they aren’t human.

Once you’re practically on top of them you’re freezing up, your mouth is going dry, and your blood is running cold, and what the FUCK is that?!?! Is it a that?! Is it an IT?! Obviously you don’t know better because whatever they are it’s most certainly not human!

Are they an alien? What else could they be?? God is there like a secret species the government is withholding from us and this is it? What are you even supposed to do? Are they even alive? If they're seriously injured they should go to the hospital, but you doubt they could just waltz right in. Should you call the police? God but what if they are alive and have to spend the rest of it in a lab being poked and prodded? They may not be human, but that doesn’t mean they deserve something like that. Nothing alive does. 

You take a deep breath, hand leaving the pepper spray to drag down your face. Okay, deep breaths and one step at a time. You should make sure they’re alive before getting ahead of yourself. Couching down to try and find a pulse, or a breath, anything to signal life really.

Surprised to find a jugular artery, even more to see their chest rising and falling. They’re oddly.. human like. The more you scrutinize the more you realize they are an odd mix of turtle and human and… male looking. As your eyes further adjust you also realize they’re quite badly beaten up. Scraps, cuts, forming bruises, you name it he’s got it.

Chewing on your lip once more -honestly a bad habit that should be broken one day- you think what to do next. He obviously needs medical attention but he can’t just waltz into an ER like you could. It’d literally cause public wide panic. The police are out of the question as you can already envision in a cell in some fancy, unescapable government lab. But you can’t just leave him here. 

So.. what do you do with him?

You sigh and glance around. You see some old forgotten tarp, and glance back toward the unconscious man in need of serious medical attention. You may only be a medical student, but you seem to be this only man’s hope.

Thus you spend the next thirty minutes doing your best to get the man and all of his suspected personal items on the tarp -which is what leads you to believe he has some kind of higher intelligence considering the item. Then the next twenty finding random items to pile on and around him. Hoping to the high heavens if someone sees you trying, and likely failing, to pull this tarp of items they’ll believe you to be a hoarder taking your loot home and not someone hiding a very alienated and injured man beneath. 

You struggle pulling him along the sidewalk towards your apartment. Often slipping against the pavement which resulted in a scraped knee, or straight up tripping which you know is going to leave you bruised and sore. A couple times the thought of just leaving him crossed your mind, but it quickly made your heart squeeze uncomfortably with guilt and a twinge of sadness, and so you pressed on each time.

Once you finally dragged him into the small living room of your less than favorable apartment, your whole body was numb and you just knew you’d feel the consequences of pulling the very large man in the morning.. Well evening considering you still have work to do and it’s already.. 1:30am

Ugh you wanted nothing more than the comfort of the you shaped dent in your bed, but this man most certainly wouldn’t make it til morning without medical attention. All the work you’ve put in so far to protect and help this man would not be for not, so you’re getting to work.

Clearing the trash from his body and piling it up off to the side-you’d clean it later- before heading off to grab everything you’d need to patch him up good as new. Or what you think new would be for him. 

Setting the supplies besides him as you set up. Disinfecting items with alcohol and donning a pair of gloves onto your hands to avoid contact with his bodily fluids before being first aid.

“Sorry for dragging you here in garbage, I just couldn’t risk anyone seeing you..” 

Why you’re even talking to him is a mystery, he’s obviously out cold. Although if he’s just paralyzed in his own body, like sleep paralysis, he might be scared. You know you would be in his shoes.

“I’m just going to clean and cover these wounds, and then I’ll be out of your hair- a well.. I won't be bothering you further.” You find yourself feeling embarrassed for a mistake he might not even hear or remember.

As you're cleaning him up, you are covering his wounds with butterfly strips, bandades, or bandages depending on the severity, you find yourself frowning at the large bump on his head. You check to see if his eyes dilate and they do, but only slightly which is concerning, but it doesn’t seem as if he had a concussion, brain damage, or bleeding with that fact. Although it doesn’t necessarily mean entirely rule it out.

You really hope that’s just a bump and not something serious. You are not equipped for that educationally nor do you have to correct tools and resources. Honestly you’re hoping all these wounds are superficial and need stitches at the max. Stitches you are equipped to handle. 

As you work you can't see anything else too disheartening -that being broken bones or internal bleeding. Several cuts that needed stitches, but other than that he’s looking pretty good.

Once you have him all cleaned and patched up, you move on to make the floor as comfortable as possible for him. Adoring him with pillows, and since you notice he was a bit chiller to the touch like, plenty of blankets. Then you set out to clean up the many first aid supplies you dragged out -along with that garbage pile you really didn’t feel like cleaning up.

Sagging when the clock showed 5:57am. You’re so exhausted, you’d be surprised if you woke up before 2pm tomorrow. Heading for your room and just plopping on your bed. You don’t even care that you’re wearing your work clothes, you’ll just clean your sheets tomorrow.

You let out a small, relieved sigh but find yourself looking towards your living room even if you can't see it. Or rather towards him, since that’s the real reason for your wandering eyes but you shake your head. You’ve done what you could and will check on him in the morning..

But you find yourself continuing to think about him. It's plaguing your brain and causing you to toss and turn.

What if he's still dying even after everything you did? God what if he wakes up scared and confused and tries to run away? What if he's secretly like evil and steals everything in your apartment before running away? There isn't much worth stealing but...

After enough time with these thoughts you sigh, collect a pillow and blanket before walking back into the living room and setting up on the couch.

"Night big guy. Hopefully you'll be alive and awake in the morning.." You say even though he still likely can't hear you -or speak English now that you think about it. Shaking your head and laying down.

For your own personal comfort, your hand slips to the floor and your fingers natural find the pulse on his wrist. Relieved it feels a bit stronger than before. With that thought, and the reminder he is very much alive pulsing against your fingers, you drift off easily into sleep.

~

Soooo, who's excited for the part two? *Que horribly wiggled eyebrows*