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hannibals-favourite-meal · 2 days

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.⋆｡Forgotten｡⋆.

Bruce Wayne x plus size reader

To love Bruce was risky and it was exhilarating but you weren’t ready to deal with its consequences when everything suddenly changed.

Warnings: angst, amnesia, injuries, unplanned pregnancy, fluff, i couldn’t help but add bat family shenanigans, hints of smut, scarecrow fear toxin, mentions of self-harm as a result of toxin, hospital visits/health scare, happy endings baby, age difference WC: 7k

Minors DNI

Library- @hannibals-favourite-meal-library

You knew Bruce Wayne.

You knew the depth of blue in his eyes, the placement of every scar and mole and freckle on his body, the little cowlick at the back of his head that would only appear when he had gone too long without a haircut.

You knew he liked tea but only when he didn’t have meetings, his right shoulder locked up when it was cold and wet, he hated the beach but loved the ocean, he regularly brought home stray animals until he was 12, and he was a hopeless romantic.

And you loved each other deeply, so deeply that you felt like there was no colour in your world before him and he had no light in his before you. It had started out simply enough, you were his secretary. Fresh from your Masters program, you needed a job and he needed a new assistant after the retirement of his last one. You were hired on the spot with the promise that it would only be temporary until you got a job in your field. But that was almost 4 years ago now and you had no intention of leaving the man you had fallen so hard for, he guiltily admitted once that he did not want you to leave either.

There were countless date nights and sleepovers, weekend getaways and times where you would spend the entire day naked in bed. You saw each other almost every day and yet it ached when you were apart for even just a few minutes.

But no one else knew.

Besides the fact that he was your boss and 10 years older than you, Bruce wanted to shield you both from his life as Batman and from the public eye. And you were terrified of the judgement of his family especially given that there was only a couple of years difference between you and his oldest kid. And it was fine, for a while at least. You got to exist in this perfect little bubble of love with the only man you could envision a future with, away from the harshness of your lives.

As it must, the real world crashes down upon your little bubble, shattering it.

“Bruce! You have a meeting!” His teeth sunk into the column of your throat with a discontented grunt as he pressed his hips even closer to your own, his arms winding around your plush middle.

“They’re not as important as this.” The tip of his nose brushed against your pulse. You let yourself melt into his strong hold for just a moment, savouring the feel of his toned body against you like you always did when Bruce lathered you with attention. With one last squeeze around your torso, Bruce reluctantly let you go. His huge hands lingered on your wide hips as you shifted so you were now facing him.

“You’ve blown them off three times already, you have to go.” You cupped his cheek, your thumb brushing along the 5 o’clock shadow that was already growing along his jaw.

“I’d rather you blow me off instead, sunny.” You smacked his chest as Bruce chuckled.

“Alright rein it in big boy, you’ll get your fill of me soon enough.”

“I think you’ll find that it’s me that does the filling.” You glared at him and stepped away, making his hands fall from your body.

“Go, before I start to rethink about our ~plans~ for the weekend.”

“Oh you fucking vixen. If I can sneak away from the boys tonight, you’re gonna be eating those words.” You spun on your heel, letting Bruce get a good look at your ass in the tight work skirt you knew he loved on you.

“I think you’ll find that you’ll be the one who will be eating. I’ll see you tomorrow Mr Wayne.” You cooed, not bothering to look back at him as you left Bruce standing in the middle of the hallway with a stunned expression and a straining in his pants.

——————

You were getting nervous now. You hadn’t seen Bruce in almost a week, which wasn’t unusual considering his ‘nightlife’ but to have no communication from him at all? That was completely out of the ordinary. There had been a message left on your office phone from his butler that Bruce had some business to attend to and would be unreachable for the foreseeable future but the way your stomach twisted in fear told you that something else was going on. He did not, in fact, sneak away that night to see you nor come to your apartment over the weekend as you both had planned. But there was nothing you could do without exposing your relationship.

So, you did what you could to keep WE functioning without him: misdirecting calls, charming impatient board members, even sending phoney emails from his account to placate people as with each passing day, that little spark of anxiety grew into a blazing fire.

Then, at promptly 9 am on the sixth day of Bruce’s disappearance, your routine was disrupted once more. You were typing away at your computer, having been in the office for almost an hour already, when you heard the elevator doors slide open and the click of men’s formal shoes against the tile. You eyed the bottle of Tylenol on your desk, anticipating yet another headache from some prissy rich boy who couldn’t take no for an answer. But you froze as soon as an imposing figure turned the corner.

Your breath caught at the sight of him. Mostly unharmed, save for the wicked looking cut across his left eyebrow, he was dressed the same way he normally would, but there was something about his posture that was completely wrong.

“Bruce.” Your legs shook as you rose to your feet. His steely gaze flicked to you as he nodded politely, not even missing a beat in his stride.

“Miss Y/L/N.” His office door slammed shut behind him and you felt your heart splinter. Silence washed over the hall and for just a moment, you could almost believe that he had been a hallucination that your anxiety ridden mind had conjured up. The ping of an email notification from your computer broke you out of your desperate reasoning and suddenly you were following his steps.

Your knuckles curled over the steak knob, just as you had done so many times in the past and you pushed open the door. Bruce looked up from the pile of papers that you had left on his own desk over the past week, brandishing you with a look far more harsh than he had ever given you before.

“Bruce, what’s going on? You’ve been gone for days with no calls, no texts. I’ve been worried sick.” His jaw clenched, sending a shot of panic up your spine.

“Miss Y/L/N I don’t know where this feeling of entitlement has come from. What I do with my time is none of your business. I am your boss- not your friend and I would keep that in mind if you wish to keep your job.” He snarled. You physically recoiled as if he had struck you, unconsciously taking a step backwards. “Please refrain from using my first name, this is a place of business.”

Never, in your many years of working for this man, who was now a stranger, did he ever speak to you with such contempt, even hatred. And it broke your heart.

Your throat bobbed as you swallowed down tears. “Of course Mr Wayne, I apologise for my unprofessionalism.” He grunted in acknowledgement. Your hands shook as you closed the door to his office, shutting yourself out from the man you loved with every piece of you.

——————

There was no greater torture than this, you thought, to watch as your soulmate iced you out until you couldn’t remember what his warmth had felt like. When was the last time his name slipped past your lips or when yours escaped his. You were forced to see him almost every day and yet, he was more like a ghost to you.

He wouldn’t even speak to you anymore. At first, he kept his interactions with you to a few words in the mornings when he arrived and evenings when he would leave. But as the weeks carried on, he spoke less and less until he would barely even look at you as he passed.

Your chest burned with thousands of questions, each breath laced with the poison of doubt and fear. You wished for this behaviour to be some sick dream, oftentimes you thought that this could be a result of Scarecrow’s fear drug. But when you awoke each morning, you knew, deep down, that this was very real. You could only wonder if this was an inevitable fate that you were meant to suffer for loving someone as unobtainable as Bruce was.

You had known since the very first moment that his blue eyes held something more than friendship for you, that your love for him would always be greater than he would ever hold for you. You knew this, and yet you didn’t think you would have to accept such a devastating truth so soon. You were greedy for him and perhaps, you had taken too much.

“Y/L/N.” The sudden call of your name snapped you from your spiral of self-pity. You looked up and met the bright green eyes of the youngest Wayne. The ever-frowning Damian was now glaring at you, an almost perfect replica of his father. “Where is my father?”

“He’s-“ You cleared your throat, feeling incredibly uncomfortable under the 10 year old’s scrutinising gaze. “He’s in his office. You can go right in.” Damian observed you for another moment before he turned his nose up and walked past you. You breathed a sigh of relief as the door behind you opened and closed, seemingly leaving you alone once more.

“Are you quite alright Miss Y/N?”

“Jesus!” You yelped in surprise, clutching your chest. The ever present force of Alfred looked down at you, lips pursed in concern. “Sorry, I didn’t see you come in.”

“I believe it is I who should be apologising, I didn’t mean to frighten you. But, are you very sure you’re ok? You seem to be out of sorts.” He stepped closer, placing Damian’s jacket on the coat rack just beside the office door.

You waved him off, your throat suddenly thick with emotion. Alfred had always been immensely kind to you in the fleeting encounters you’d had with the man. And for a while, you believed that he knew about you and Bruce, but since he had been acting the same way since Bruce’s unexplained absence, you were obviously wrong.

With a glance over your shoulder, as if to double check that your boss wasn’t listening in, you grabbed your purse from the floor and quickly slung it over your shoulder. “He doesn’t have any other meetings today so I think I may leave early. It was nice to see you, Alfred.”

And before he could even get a single word of protest out, you had already dashed to the elevator and slipped inside. As the reflective doors shut, you were able to catch the way Alfred frowned, his brown eyes dark as he watched you run.

You managed to hold off your sobs until you were safely in your car. Grief wrapped around your chest like a snake, slowly crushing your ribs inwards until all you could manage was small gasps of air as you slowly drowned in it. It was all getting too much, Bruce and work and this stupid fucking nausea that kept showing up at the worst times.

The stress was going to wear you down until you were nothing and what did you get out of it? A boss that couldn’t even look you in the eye even after years of sharing your life and your bed with him. He was acting like he didn’t even know your first name. You couldn’t keep doing this to yourself.

Tears still rolled down your rounded cheeks as the car’s engine turned over and you pulled out of your designated spot. The white paint that they used to write your name was chipping away, leaving a faded imprint of each letter like a child’s chalk drawing that was being washed away.

Your hiccuping sobs were slowly dying down until you pulled into your apartment complex and a notification appeared on your phone. The screen lit up the inside of your car, immediately drawing your attention to it.

‘Your period is 6 weeks late, is it stress or something more?’

——————

Silence in the office was not unusual for the top floor of Wayne Enterprises, though a complete lack of any noise was deeply concerning. Bruce once again glanced over his monitor to the open door where your vacant desk was clearly visible. His eyes flicked to the time displayed on the screen in front of him, you were over a half hour late and for the life of him, he couldn’t figure out why.

Just as Bruce was reaching over for his phone, you turned the corner. Your heels, far smaller than you normally wore he noted, clacked against the flooring as you strode towards him. Before you could spot him looking at you, he forced his gaze back down to the spreadsheets he hadn’t even bothered to read when he arrived this morning. His stomach fluttered as he heard you enter his office. Bruce tried to swallow the feeling down like he always did when you were around.

“I’m resigning.” His neck audibly popped as his head snapped up, suddenly all of his attention on you. Your hands trembled as you put a sheet of paper on his desk and quickly took a step back like a deer preparing to run. Bruce kept his eyes on you, the muscle in his jaw rolling as he bit back a thousand questions.

“I’m assuming this is effective immediately?” You nodded while he leaned back in his chair as nonchalantly as he could. “Is there any reason why? I thought you were happy working here.”

Your left eye twitched but you steeled yourself with a deep breath. “I’m not obligated to tell you the reason why I’m leaving, just as you promised when you hired me. I have responsibilities elsewhere. I left candidates for your next secretary on my desk.” You turned on your heel, intent on leaving as quickly as you possibly could.

“Wait-“ Bruce darted out of his seat, sending it flying back as he rushed forwards. “Please I just want to know why, I think I deserve that much.” His large hand wrapped around your wrist in an iron grip, forcing you to stop your retreat.

“You’re a fucking asshole, you know that Bruce.” You didn’t even bother to look at him as you spoke. “I really thought you were different. But obviously, I was wrong. You’re so selfish and cruel and I made the mistake of falling in love with you.”

He stumbled back as you finally met his gaze. Your eyes were burning with a loathing that sent a chill to his bones. “So no, you don’t deserve to know why I’m leaving. Be glad I even did you the courtesy of giving you my resignation in writing.” You yanked your hand from his hold. “Goodbye Mr Wayne. Don’t contact me.”

And then you stormed out of his life, leaving the feared Bat of Gotham confused and with a massive pit in his heart.

——————

“Okay, so we agree that this isn’t an invasion of anyone’s privacy, Y/N or B’s, because it’s for the sake of the greater good.” Dick made eye contact with each of his younger siblings as if to reinforce this statement.

“Yeah cause if B doesn’t stop moping around and nagging us, I will actually kill him.” Jason quipped from where he was perched on the fire escape. Cass nodded in agreement from beside the bigger man as Steph snorted under her breath.

“I’m just here for the drama. I’ve never seen him acting like a moody teenager before. Babs wants me to keep her updated.” Dick sighed heavily, deciding to ignore her comment as he continued to address the others.

“We stay hidden and only observe. Got that Damian?”

“Why am I being singled out when Drake was the one that hacked into her medical records?”

“For the last time, it wasn’t her medical records, it was just her employment records!”

“Like that’s any better.” Tim glared at Duke.

“You’re the one who snitched.”

“Hey!” Dick stepped in before they could escalate their little squabble, “That doesn’t matter now. What does matter is finding out exactly what happened to make Y/N quit and B so fucking miserable.”

“Ooo golden boy swore, guess that means it’s serious.” Jason jostled Cass with his shoulder as she giggled quietly. Dick rolled his eyes.

“If you’re not gonna take this seriously, you can just go home.” Red Hood rose to his feet, his gloved hands raised in surrender.

“I am taking this seriously, I just also enjoy annoying you. It’s called multitasking.”

“Father is fine. I don’t understand why this is necessary.” Damian huffed from his place at Dick’s side. He had been adamant that nothing was wrong with Bruce, even after the increased number of injuries he had been receiving on a nightly basis and a general disinterest in anything besides crime fighting. All the kids knew that it was a problem but Damian got to go on more patrols so he was content.

“Because demon brat, ever since Y/N quit, he’s been in an awful-ass mood and has been making it our problem. I would rather not have the old man keep sticking his nose in my business just because he’s cranky.”

“And-“ Duke shot Jason a look, “he’s getting extremely reckless. We’ve all seen the amount of med supplies he’s been going through. If we don’t find out what’s going on, he’s gonna end up in a body bag.” Silence fell upon the rooftop.

We can help both of them. Cass signed. I really liked Y/N. She was nice.

Tim cleared his throat. “So, can we go now? The longer we’re not responding to Alfred, the more chance B comes after us.” Dick put his hand on Damian’s shoulder.

“Tim’s right. We stay low and we stay quiet. Duke, Jay you two go on ahead and we’ll follow behind. Do not engage and don’t be creepy.” He spoke specifically to Jason.

“This whole thing is fucking creepy but fine, I guess I won’t look in her nightstand.” And before Dick could even open his mouth to scold his younger brother, he was gone over the side of the building. Duke shrugged and followed after, his footsteps silent beneath the sounds of the city.

Damian jerked forwards but Nightwing’s grip on his shoulder kept him stuck to the spot. “You’re with Steph. You two keep an ear open for the big man but other than that, stay off the comms. Cass, Tim with me, we’ll cover the street and then come up behind.” Cass nodded and pulled her mask up higher over her nose, following after her older brothers.

“Are you sure about this Dick? If we’re wrong-“

“I know T, but what if we’re right? Something happened between those two and maybe, we can make it right. B isn’t himself and it’s affecting all of us.” Dick then released his youngest brother. “Remember, stay out of sight.”

As soon as he disappeared into the night, Stephanie muttered. “This is bullshit.”

“I agree.”

Your apartment was easy to find— the 7th floor of a relatively upscale building, one that was suspiciously out of your price range. Jason raised an eyebrow at the double glazed window panes as well as the discreet sill reinforcements he could just make out around the edges of the glass.

“She’s either extremely paranoid or someone else is.” Duke grunted in agreement.

“Think B is behind it?”

Jason shrugged as he lowered himself down onto the steel grate of the fire escape that snaked past the apartment’s windows. “That or she’s got a hell of a lot more secrets than we thought.” Duke dropped down beside him, the two of them moving in sync along the catwalk.

The kitchen was dark, as was the living room. Duke’s head jerked to the right, drawing Jason’s eyes to the soft glow coming from the last window. He gently squeezed the shorter man’s shoulder as he slipped past.

Jason pressed his bulk against the naked brick and crept his way forwards, keeping to the shadows as much as he could. Thin curtains covered the window from the inside, but it did nothing to hinder his view of the brightly lit bedroom.

You were sitting in a rocking chair in the corner of the room, eyes locked onto a small black and white photo in your right hand. Your left gently cradled your belly, your thumb gently brushing over the soft layer of fat. Even through the haze of the sheer curtains, the sadness on your face was as clear as day.

Jason’s own eyes narrowed in on the image in your hand before he stumbled backwards, almost falling from the fire escape. His neck clicked as his eyes met Signal’s who was suddenly standing ram-rod straight.

“Holy shit she’s pregnant.” But before Duke or Jason could even begin to comprehend the magnitude of their discovery, the bedroom window slammed open and suddenly, you and the Red Hood were face-to-face.

“Do you all want to come in for tea or should I tell you to fuck off now?”

“Huh, I guess she did have some secrets.” You moved out of the way, letting Duke slip into the warm apartment and leaving Jason stunned for only a second before he clicked on his com system.

“Yo, we’ve been caught.” And then he followed behind.

The bedroom was smaller than he thought it would be, but it was cosy. A thick duvet on the bed, a candle on the vanity in the corner. It was… nice. Duke had already made himself comfortable at the kitchen counter by the time Jason stepped out of the bedroom. The thick black and yellow helmet he donned was neatly placed on the chair beside him.

“Dude.” Jason whined but his little brother only smiled at him, his eyes crinkling in the corners.

“Would you like milk in your tea Jason?”

“What the fu- goddamnit. Yes and honey too please.” You hummed softly and set the kettle on the stove.

“I take it the same way. Mugs are in the cabinet above the sink, grab them for me. Duke, would you mind opening the front door, I’d rather not have mud tracked into my bedroom.” The teen dutifully stalked off as Jason retrieved said mugs and set them down on the counter. His own helmet soon joined his brother’s as he leaned against the wall across from you.

You continued to fuss about the kitchen, pulling out some biscuits and sugar as well. “It’s Bruce’s isn’t it?” Your body stuttered but you were quickly composed once more, though you did not look Jason’s way.

“I think you already know the answer to that.” He lurched forward as if he were about to defend his adoptive father but then just as suddenly, he leaned back and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Jesus. I just thought you got sick of him.” You chuckled under your breath though it was plain enough that there was no joy in it. You looked truly exhausted as you placed a tea bag in each mug, the dark circles that marred your face almost broke Jason’s heart.

“You’ll find that it’s the other way around.” But before he could open his mouth to object, the rest of his siblings burst into the apartment, led by a frazzled Dick.

“How!”

“I would appreciate it if you didn’t yell in my apartment Richard, I don’t want a noise complaint.” Dick’s jaw shut with an audible click, his shoulders slouching in defeat.

“Yes ma’am.”

“Good dog.” Steph cooed as she strutted past, her own mask already off and safely tucked into her belt. She gunned straight for the freshly poured tea. The others shambled around the stunned man, each finding their own spot in your apartment.

The air was stale with questions that none of them wanted to ask though the answers were obvious. Damian settled himself beside you, the top of his head just barely peeking out over the top of the stone counter. The blank white eyes of his mask were fixed on the steaming mugs.

“This is acceptable.” This time your laugh was genuine as you gently pushed the largest mug towards the 10 year old who quickly snatched it off the counter. Jason noticed the way the tension in your shoulders gradually eased as each of his siblings took their own tea, filling the room with quiet murmurings.

Dick was the last to approach you. “So you know.”

You nodded and offered him his own cup. “I know. Figured it out pretty soon after I was hired.”

He gratefully took the mug, letting its warmth seep into his gloved hands as he sank onto a chair from the dining room. You smiled sweetly at him before your attention was pulled away by Steph who interpreted for Cass. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

You shrugged, the fingers of your left hand brushed against the swell of your belly. “What could I have said ‘hey I know you and your kids dress up in costumes and run around Gotham at night punching people, anyway, can you sign this document?’. Bruce- Mr Wayne and I had an understanding; I don’t mention the whole bat thing and he actually starts doing work and showing up on time. Plus a great health care package.”

“Apparently that wasn’t the only package you were getting.” The words had barely left Jason’s mouth before Cass slapped the back of his head, hard. “Fuck! What was that for?” She gave him a withering look then met your eyes once more with a silent apology.

You smiled at her and continued. “I wouldn’t put it as crassly but yes, we were together. Our anniversary was supposed to be next week.”

“And now you’re pregnant.” You nodded at Duke.

“I’m 12 weeks as of yesterday.”

Tim cleared his throat but kept his eyes locked on his now empty mug. “There was an incident during patrol a few weeks ago. Bruce got hit with a new serum scarecrow had been developing and- it was really bad. He threw himself at walls and us, screaming about how he needed pain. We were only able to stop him when he knocked himself out on a pipe. He was in really bad shape, when he finally woke up after three days, he couldn’t even remember his own name.

“We all had to come home and essentially re-introduce ourselves to him but he did remember us, some just took longer than others. He recognised Cass as soon as she smiled at him while it took Dick swinging from the chandelier in the dining room for it to click.” Dick’s cheeks warmed in embarrassment.

“I did what I had to do.”

“Tt, you just wished to show off Grayson.” Damian chose to speak up then, making you jump as his voice was far closer than it had been a few minutes before. The youngest Wayne now stood at your hip, barely an inch of space between the two of you. “Father remembered me the quickest.”

Jason rolled his eyes. “Oh yeah definitely, it had nothing to do with you getting upset and throwing a temper tantrum for him to remember.” Damian glared at his older brother but made no move to stray from your side.

“Anyway.” Tim continued. “After what happened we’ve been trying to help him but-“

“He’s fucking miserable.” Duke interrupted, “He has been since the accident and even more so after you quit. At least hear him out.” Duke leaned forward, planting his elbows onto the kitchen counter. “At least you should tell him about the baby so he could help support you.” His voice strained like he was on the edge of tears.

“Your father doesn’t owe me anything. I was greedy and I took too much. I-“ You choked on your words and suddenly, you were just a heartbroken girl standing in front of them. “I just want peace now so I think it would be best if you all forgot about me, about this. I get that you want to protect your father and under any other circumstance, I would agree with you but even if what you said is true, then why hasn’t he remembered me? We were together for almost four years, and saw each other every day. If he needed to see me to jog his memory or talk to me then that would’ve been solved the day he walked back into the office. He doesn’t want to remember- he doesn’t want me.”

No one spoke until you cleared your throat and turned towards the kitchen sink, your back now to the whole group. “I think you all should leave. Just forget tonight ever happened. We’re not your concern and we certainly aren’t Bruce’s. I appreciate that you all care so much but I don’t think this is something that can be fixed.”

“But-“ Steph tried.

“Please, go. This hurts enough as it is, don’t make it worse.”

Dick sighed. “She’s right. Let’s give her some space. C’mon.” You ignored the way their pitying looks burned against the back of your neck as they each walked out the door, donning their masks once more until Dick was the last one in your apartment. “Here’s my number, call if you need anything at all. And I mean anything, even if it’s for stupid cravings. You may think that Bruce abandoned you but I won’t.”

He gave your shoulder a friendly squeeze before slipping out behind his siblings.

You waited until the door shut to finally cry, not knowing that all the kids could hear you.

——————

“Do you ever want to tell them about us?” Your voice was soft, as if you were whispering a dark secret. Bruce’s heart thumped loudly beneath your ear as you rested on his naked chest. You traced the pale lines of scars that littered his torso, occasionally pressing soft kisses to his overheated skin.

His large hand cupped the back of your head as he let his lips brush against your crown. “Maybe one day princess. But I want to keep you to myself just a bit longer.” You wanted to protest but the fight was quickly stolen from you as Bruce rolled you onto your back, slotting himself between your plump thighs as you felt him harden once more. “Let me spoil my girl in peace.” Any protests you had were quickly drowned out as he pulled moans from you.

Bruce lurched up with a gasp, desperately trying to suck in oxygen as the dream replayed in his mind. It felt so real but there is no way that it could be, he would’ve remembered it by now if it was.

“Fuck.” His ribs screamed in protest at his violent awakening. Even a month after his run in with the Scarecrow, his body was barely recovering and he could feel pieces of his mind that had still yet to fit themselves back into place.

The blaring green light from the clock on his nightstand told him that he had only been asleep for an hour, an improvement after he recovered from the concussion but still not great. The cold hardwood sent a jolt of alertness up his spine, but did nothing to subdue the torrent of images that flashed in his mind every time he so much as blinked.

The curve of your shoulder as water droplets ran down your back.

Bruce rocked his weight forward and stood with a groan.

Your thick thighs wrapped around his hips as he gripped you by the waist and thrust downwards.

He slipped a shirt over his shoulders, and tugged on a pair of sweats as he headed for the door to his bedroom.

Candle light flickering across your face as you cradled him against your chest, his lips branding every inch of skin he could reach.

“What a fucking pervert.” He snarled to himself. All you had ever been was kind to him, and respectful. And yet he was imagining you in his bed. Not only in his bed, some twisted part of his mind coos. His nails bit into his palm as he swallowed thickly.

It started the first day back after his ‘accident’. Bruce vaguely knew who you were, fleeting memories of your job interview and casual conversations at the beginning of the work day. Alfred had told him of your intelligence and hard work but none of his family could recall anything other than a professional relationship between the two of you.

The second he saw you, he couldn’t stop thinking about you. He wanted to touch you, kiss you, just be in your presence but how could he? You were young, his secretary and you would be in danger if he indulged. And still, you remained.

For weeks, Bruce buried himself in the mystery of you. He needed to know what it was about you that captivated him. Yet none of the information he uncovered gave him answers and you still remained in his dreams. He pushed himself into patrols, into training and work. He had already been on the end of dozens of lectures from Alfred and Dick (and one very strange one from Damian), he kept pushing on.

The cave’s chill sliced through him as Bruce stepped from the elevator and he was greeted by the sight of his oldest and youngest bickering by the huge wall of monitors. He ignored them.

The police scanner was suspiciously silent as he took a seat in front of his workbench. “You shut off the alert system.” His voice was raspy from disuse but it immediately silenced his boys and drew their gaze to him.

“Grayson did it. I was just informing him how irresponsible he’s being.”

“And I was telling Damian that you need a break, desperately.”

“Chum-“

“No. I’m serious Bruce, you’re actively fucking killing yourself and I won’t let you. Jason and Cass are covering your patrols for the foreseeable future and you are staying put. I am sick of this stupid self-destruction rampage you’re going on.”

Dick’s phone suddenly rang, the default tone echoing around the cave for a moment before he fished it from his pocket and answered. “Grayson.” As the person on the other end spoke, his eyebrows scrunched and his jaw tightened.

“Which hospital are they taking you to? Ok, I’ll meet you there, just keep breathing, everything's going to be fine.” The line went dead. Dick regarded his father with a look. “I have to go but this is not the end of this conversation.” Before he could take a step towards the exit, Damian grabbed his brother’s hand.

“Is Y/N hurt?” There were moments like this where Dick cursed the fact that his little brother was so observant. He could see Bruce sit up, his focus no longer on the work in front of him.

“She’s fine, just a little scared but she’ll be alright.”

Then Damian did something so dumb, Dick knew that it was on purpose. “Is the baby ok?”

There was a beat, then another as he waited on his father’s reaction. Damian had already tried to jog his memory on the topic of you but nothing ever worked and he only succeeded in pissing off his siblings who tried to get him to understand that it wasn’t his decision to make. “The baby?” Bruce whispered like the air had just been knocked from his lungs.

Dick’s temples pulsed with the beginning of a migraine and he glowered at the young boy. “The baby is fine, they’re gonna run some tests. You stay here and we’re going to have a very long talk when I get back.”

“Y/N’s pregnant?” He ignored his father and instead shook off Damian before he jogged to the elevator. So instead Bruce looked to the boy that stood alone in front of the wall of glowing monitors. “Is-is the baby-“

“It appears as though I won’t be the youngest any longer. If you run, you could catch up.”

Bruce’s stomach dropped. “I-“

Damian glared at him. “Go.”

——————

“I’m only taking you because I think that you’re still listed as her emergency contact so I need you in order to visit.” Bruce nodded solemnly as Dick pulled into a parking spot in the hospital garage. “You will not talk to her, you won’t even fucking look at her.” He took his father’s silence as agreement.

The powerful engine cut off and without another word, he stepped from the car, expecting Bruce to follow behind. Bruce had always hated hospitals, the air too stale from all the cleaning chemicals they used, the silence, the blinding lights. But if you were here, he would spend the rest of his life on the uncomfortable waiting room chairs just to make sure you were safe.

“I’m here to see Y/N Y/L/N, she called me from the ambulance.” The older nurse at the check-in desk raised her eyebrow at the pair.

“She’s in room 335. Down the hall, third door on your right.”

“Thank you.” Bruce trailed along behind his son, the questions in his mind building up higher and higher with each step he took. But all he could concentrate on was if you were ok.

Dick gave him a warning look as they reached the room. “It’s me, can I come in?” There was a muffled response and then Dick slipped inside, quickly shutting the door behind him.

The hall was now only filled with the beeping machines from other rooms and the occasional call over the pa system, leaving nothing to distract Bruce from the fear that curled around his heart. He knew what he was going to do was a bad idea, one that could have the potential to destroy not only any redemption with you but might fracture the already tumultuous relationship he had with his son.

But he had to see you, just once.

As quietly as he could, Bruce grabbed the door handle and slowly pushed his way in, praying that the hinges didn’t squeak.

“I’m ok, I just got a bit dizzy and fell down like 1 step. I think the ambulance was totally unnecessary.”

Dick shook his head. “Will you just let someone take care of you for once?”

You chuckled softly and took his hand in such a maternal fashion, it made Bruce’s heart lurch in his chest. “I called, didn't I?”

The door swung fully open, hitting the wall behind with a resounding thud. Both your attentions snapped to Bruce.

You sat up in bed on the opposite side of the room, dressed in a flimsy hospital gown and illuminated by harsh lights but you were still the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Your fading smile was tired and your eyes bloodshot from crying and Bruce realised that you were comforting Dick, not the other way around. He hadn’t seen you smile in so long.

“Why is he here?” You hissed and visibly curled in on yourself, arms around your stomach.

“Bruce-“

“I know you.”

He knew each dip and bump and curve of your soft body, the colour of your eyes in the sun and how different they were under fluorescent lights, which hairstyle you wore indicating what mood you were in.

He knew your insecurities and your trauma, you hated humidity but didn’t mind the heat, the names of all your plants, and the way you would smile just a bit brighter and just a bit wider when children or animals were around.

He knew you loved him.

Bruce Wayne knew he loved you.

“I-I know you.” His voice shook as he took a step towards you yet this time, you didn’t flinch away. “Sunny. My sun. My light.”

“Bruce.” A tear rolled down your cheek.

“I’m so sorry.” He fell to his knees beside you, his head bowed. “I’m sorry my love. I didn’t mean to, I didn’t- Why couldn’t I remember?” He sobbed.

“It doesn’t matter now.” Your fingers, your perfect delicate fingers, brushed away his tears before you gently cupped his cheeks, lifting his gaze back up to meet yours.

“I was so horrible to you, I didn’t know. And you’re- god you’re pregnant.” His hands slid up the side of the bed, cupping your thigh over the scratchy hospital blankets. You nodded and guided them higher so his palms spread over your growing stomach. “Wow I guess I really did do the filling huh?”

“Oh god, ‘m gonna throw up.”

You laughed as Bruce bashfully looked over at his son. “Sorry chum.”

“I’m gonna go get some coffee, by the time I get back, you two better be fully dressed.” Your lips snapped shut as you looked away in embarrassment and it was Bruce’s turn to chuckle.

“Sunny, I’m so sorry, you deserved so much better.”

“Will you stop that? I know it wasn’t your fault.”

“But it still hurt you and I made a promise to never do that. So please, let me grovel.” He laid his head onto your thigh while you threaded your fingers into his hair.

“What made you remember?”

“Your smile. I realised that I would always remember your smile and then everything came flooding back.”

“You’re a fucking sap you know that.” You tugged on his hair but Bruce just smiled dumbly at you before he smirked.

“Marry me.”

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gracejh08 · 1 day

Text

Breaking the media

Chapter 10- injury

Game day had rolled around quicker than you had expected you had pushed yourself at training the other day to increase the chance of you starting the words of alexia still forefronting your mind. Once again you and alexia had arrived ungodly early for a late kick off game but at least it was a home match, the team had managed to have a consistent amount of home games however the following weeks wouldn't be as nice as the fixtures increased to the away days which was never fun to be stuck on a coach for hours or a plane depending if it was a champions league fixture. You had just slipped your boot on when the last teamate had arrived it was pina as she had said she got caught in the traffic and had to drive with her hood up and with sunglasses on to hide her identity while driving. "Oh come on pina, next time you should have a better disguise maybe keep a secret wig in your glove box" you retorted to her laughing "right yeah I'll get a bald cap to put in there" she said deadpanning her face "yeah yeah whatever works" you said leaving the changing room and heading for the field.

The warm up felt like it was dragging and that might have been due to the nerves that sat in your stomach or the excitement of potentially starting. Jona called in everyone and told everyone the starting line up and formation and than when "right for defence we have ona on the left mapi and irene in the middle and y/n on the right" he said and you could have ran and hugged him on the spot but you kept your cool until he left and you were practically jumping around like a toddler "come on y/n keep the energy for the game you've got a whole 90 minutes to use it" mapi said "sorry my bad I'll save it for the game". Kickoff was in 5 minutes so you lined up with the team in the tunnel and all of a sudden nerves wracked through you it wasnt as if you hadn't started a game before but this time it felt different like you were playing because you were good enough not because a player was injured. Yous were playing athletico Madrid so while you didn't have to worry on technical abilities you were prepared for a physical game one which you knew you would have to be careful as they have quite the record with fouling players.

The game started the ball was moving between the teams feet just like practice as you were told to pass in triangles which really helped and when the chance break through the field and persue for a goal. Thats exactly what you did when you sent a long ball down into the center field straight at salmas feet and she volleyed the ball into the back of the net to take the lead early in the game. Barcelona continued to dominate the game for the first half and adding another goal to the score line to go up by 2-0 at half time. The score had riled the frustrations in the other team leading them to play dirty and getting more aggressive as the minutes went by, it was around 70 minutes when Barcelona were awarded a corner so as instructed you ran towards the box as being one of the taller girls on the field you had a slight vantage point than others. The ball was swung in from the side and from what you could see was coming straight towards your head as you jumped to get your head on the ball you felt an awful pain as the opposing attacker had full force shoved you in the back and when landing her foot stood on the inside of your ankle causing it to land inwards when you landed leaving you a crumpled mess on the floor. The sound your ankle made could only be described as horrific everyone went silent and just looked to the floor at you face down in the grass almost screaming out in pain it was the worst pain you had ever felt in your life and it was radiating through your body.

It was alexia who had watched it happen and the minute you didn't get up from the floor she came running to check on you shoving the athletico players out of the way "hey pequeña where does it hurt" she said placing her hand on your back "my ankle please ale it hurts really bad" you said through tears choking on your words if alexia could she would have taken all your pain and given it to herself. "Its okay dont panic the medics are coming" she said not leaving your side as the medics ran across the pitch. The more time passed it wasnt just alexia by your side it was mapi, ingrid and even lucy and kiera who were constantly making sure you were okay while irene and marta profusely argued with the ref to get the girl who did this to you sent off or atleast carded for the matter. You were sure it was bad but when the stretcher had been brought out you couldn't believe it, it felt like your whole world was crashing in on you no football for atleast a few months and you had to go through long rehab sessions you couldn't believe it why you? Of all playing it was selfish to think that you wished it was another player but you couldn't help but think it. You whinced in pain as they moved you from the ground to the stretcher and alexia never let go off you the whole way holding your hand to make sure you were okay or maybe it was reassurance to herself that you would be okay "I'll come find you the minute the game is finished okay don't stress about it you will be okay pequeña" she said letting go of your hand as you were carried off the field and into the tunnel and she switched back into game mode to win this game for you.

The game had ended up finishing 6-1 with athletico getting a lucky corner and the ball slipped through panos hands to go in the net however the win was briefly celebrated by alexia as she normally stays to greet some of the fans however she rushed straight to find you in the medical room. Meanwhile for you the past 20 minutes have been a living nightmare your body throbbed with pain as the emotions rised in you yet you wouldn't cry not here not infront of a bunch of strangers they had gave you some painkillers in hopes that would numb the pain but they didn't help much. When alexia had opened the door you had jusy arrived back from the scans where they would check to see the severity of the injury. She looked at you as tears welled in your eyes you could only hold them back so long so as the medical staff informed you for the next month you would be in a boot and have crutches giving them to you as they left the room. Just then the water works began tears streamed down yourself as alexia sat next to you as you crumpled into her side as she rubbed circles on your back. When the tears slowed down it was ingrid and mapi who had entered the room holding your bags and new clothes for both you and alexia as she had forgot to get changed before seeing you. "right I'll be back once im changed then I'll help you and we can go home okay" she said removing her arm from you and silently thanking her best friend and girlfriend as they helped you remove you socks and shin pads being extra careful to not knock your ankle.

Alexia had returned after showering and get changed to find you waiting to go as she managed to balance hers and your bag while holding the doors open for you as you slowly made your way through the halls to the car park. Alexia had dumped the bags in the back seat of the car as she helped you into the passenger side of the car. You sighed to yourself as a long road of recovery was ahead of you and one which alexia would be by your side every step of the way. You had arrived back home and alexia waited as long as it took you to make it to the apartment and there you collapsed on your bed and fell asleep without even changing your mind was filled with negativity and yet alexia was ready to help you every step of the way.

#alexia x reader #barca femeni #woso #woso x reader #mapi leon #ingrid engen #woso imagines #lucy bronze

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oreo102 · 1 day

Note

Not really an ask but a mutual complaint. I don't get why because 14 settled down and 15 is "healed" that we're supposed to be OK that they got to find love and happiness easily but 13 didn't.

We’re supposed to be okay with it because no one likes 13. The majority of the fandom either won’t give her a chance because of bad faith criticism or are the ones making it. I had someone tell me before I even started watching her, after I mentioned that if I were to watch Dr who, it’d be her, tell me that I wouldn’t like her because the writing was atrocious(it’s not).

13 can’t even have a relationship with the woman who she said she wants to spend eternity with (or smth of the like in legend of the sea devil), can’t kiss, can’t hold hands, can’t even hug! Yaz and 13 hug a single time unless I’m remembering wrong, which is as likely as it isn’t with how much I’ve watched her era.

But 14 gets to settle down with Donna and her family. He gets to have a tardis and his old bestie from like 1000 years ago, he gets to heal. He gets what everyone and their mom wanted 10 to get. He gets a happy ending.

And 15 gets to mention his trauma in a light tone, he doesn’t have the crushing weight of guilt every other doctor had, no, he’s healed! He gets to go on silly little adventures with his best friend who is actually super mysterious and that’s a totally good thing to hold up like a treat to a fucking mutt. They get to hug! 3 times in one episode. I remember that specifically because every time it happened I felt a pang of annoyance and pettiness.

This isn’t to say I don’t like 15. I really do like him, he’s fun and he’s really the only reason I’d continue watching the newest season. I just- can’t juggle my love and loyalty to 13(srsly I’ve had to stop myself from starting fights multiple times in the last 24 hours) with seeing him get what she never did.

I understand why they brought David tenant back. He is a great ways to get views, the majority of people really love him and I know at least my mom watched she specials especially to see him, my friend started watching Dr who bc they love him. I just wish they would’ve given 13 a happier ending. I wish they would MENTION yaz. Even if not by name. It’d be easy- really it would, have them spend some time in the tardis- have Ruby touch something and 15 be like “no touching- only one human is allowed to fly her” or smth like that (idc if that’s wrong. I don’t. Don’t comment telling me if this is wrong.)

We’re supposed to be fine with 13’s ending be bittersweet, when the doctor after her gets an almost too perfect happy ending, and 15 gets to be healed from his trauma (not how trauma works) because they don’t care. They don’t care about 13, they don’t care about yaz, they don’t care about thasmin fans, they don’t care about fans they got with her, they just don’t care. And that’s- fine. But I won’t watch his series

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hand-picked-star · 3 days

Text

The 13th Annniversary Arshi Fiesta

Moodboard : historical AU | Chapter 02

I am not very good at writing ffs.I even read ffs very selectively. But it was a attempt of me to participate in the 13th annniversary arshi fiesta. I might be wrong about certain aspect of that age and era, but it's a fantasy, so why not?

I don't own Arnav and khushi and the story is purely fictional and has no relation to any living or dead.Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Chapter 2

After 10 years

Arnav was threading the busy traffic of the bazar with his ambassador mark 1 to reach the st.Stephen all women college of Delhi to pick up certain someone who he hadn't talked to, for almost 2 years.Though it was the cheapest car of that generation,it was his most prized possession at that moment , brought by the profit he got from his first export shipments of the textile factory he bought 1 year ago.But his mind was on that girl who lived in his mind rent-free till that fateful day 2 years ago and hadn't left ever since. Even at that moment,he could still feel her,if he closed his eyes.

Shaking himself off to get rid of that feeling,he concentrated on the road. Arnav's focus cleared to zoom in that girl of question , no no, a young woman, in a simple white saree with blue border, a mandatory college-ware. The way she drapped the saree over her was very modest,but modesty seemed to allude Arnav today.His heart gave a thud realizing he could vividly feel how that body felt pressed to his. 'control yourself, Arnav. you've done so much damage already', Arnav chastised himself, willing his heart to a normal rhythm. Her hair was pleated into a single braid and simple black bindi in middle of her eyebrows.That was what Arnav was so scared of. Her little bindi had the power over him that the whole oxford female faternity didn't. He might have not talked to her but he saw her secretly every time he came to Dehli and watched her spread her wings like a butterfly to be the beautiful woman she end up being. Roma chachi had given her an apt name 'titliya'. All those time watching her from distance Arnav tried his best to control his heart and mind,but end up failing every single time. There was a reason why he avoided her for 2 years.

Khushi was standing on the gate of the college with her classmate, Sarita Chauhan,waiting for Akash vai to pick her up. Khushi was irritated, she insisted to take the rickshaw back home but due to the overprotective nature of bhai and Babuji, she couldn't do that. But she didn't expected to see Him that day and somehow she knew he had come to pick her up.The last two years did a kind of magic to him or was it london or the girls of london to be exact, she didn't know. The Arnav sitting in front of her in that car donning the black glasses and clad in rolled up white shirt and black suspenders was a far cry from the man she last saw.But he was still Arnav among all of these , Her Arnav. That's why it didn't susprise her when her heart went overboard 'dhak-dhak,dhak-dhak,dhak-dhak'. Her friend beside her produced a small sound of appreciation,

"oh khushi, you've never introduced me to your brothers.now I understand why." giving her a little nudge with her shoulder.

Khushi scoffed at her comment " he is not my brother. "

It's been 10 years that she lost her parents. And in middle of all of these when Mahindar chacchu became her Babuji and Manoroma chachi became Amma, she couldn't exactly pinpoint.And as a result she got two brothers who loved her fiercely as their own.Abba had arranged a home tutor for her when she was 10 yrs old,coz she couldn't bear the stress of public schooling. As soon as she started to form complete sentences her tutor advised her to write letters to her brothers, studying in darjeling. She wrote letters to Akash bhai and Aman bhai and then she wrote another letter to Arnav addressing him as 'Dear Arnav'. Her tutor chastised her for not adding a 'bhai' or a 'ji' at the end of his name.But Arnav was never her 'bhai', was he? He never felt like a 'bhai'. He was so much more.But above all he was Her 'Arnav'.Just 'Arnav.' she used to call her 'Arnav' since she was 8.Nobody corrected her till she was 16.Then she started to call him 'Arnavji'. Now she didn't know what to call him anymore.

Arnav parked the car in front of her. when she made no move to sit inside, he opened the car door from inside and addressed her -

" what are you waiting for Khushi Kumari Gupta? pandit bulake mahurat nikal na parega kya?" giving her the crooked half smile that she adored. God, she missed him so much. "Akash bhai and Aman are busy in the printing press. Cachu asked me to drop you home."

Khushi stared at him for another moment then with a huff she entered the car, which was a bad decision she understood not long after.Being in a closed space with him was a torture.Both of them stared at anything but at each other, but soon khushi couldn't resist the temptation to steal a look of him, which was a far worse decision than the previous one. Her eyes found his hands on the steering wheel,clutching it and as soon as flashback of those hands flooded her mind - those hands clutching her smaller ones when they used to take a walk, those hands closing the hook of a payal around her ankles,those hands teaching her smaller ones to hold the chalk to write on the black slate, those hands helping her to plant rose plants on the garden. Her mind shifted to her smaller hands giving prasad to his larger ones, his hands cracking open the peanut shell for her whenever they went to the mela,his hands pulling her braids.'Have those hand became larger till the last time she saw them?' Khushi mused silently. Then a switch flipped in her mind, more flashbacks, she started to feel his hands on her cheek, on her waist,on the back of her head.khushi closed her eyes tightly and clutched the books on her hands and to drive away those vision from her mind, blurted out what came to her mind at that moment " Anjali di said, you could not come to Delhi for another 3 months"

Arnav, looking at khushi from the corner of his eyes, said "I didn't plan to. But My best friend is marrying my little sister.I wouldn't miss that wedding for the world and Roma chachi said no more auspicious 'mohurat' after this month untill the end of this year.And it's not like I have not been traveling to and fro between Delhi and London in last couple of years."

Khushi nodding and trying to shallow down the hurt, said solemnly "I know."

Arnav was studying law in Oxford University for last couple of years. He had passed his bar exam and was doing apprenticeship under a Barrister in london for last one year.She knew all of this from Aman bhai.On the other hand, Arnav sold the land that his grandfather gave him and bought a run-down textile factory in old Delhi.She knew he had been very busy and she also knew he had been to Dehli multiple time in last 2 years. He didn't stay in Rajput haveli now-a-days when he came to Delhi.He had rented a two-storied bungalow in the outskirts of the town. But what hurt her more was he went to rajput haveli to meet Amma and babuji every time he came to Delhi , only when she was in school. So, it was not so difficult to figure out, who he was avoiding. Why, why she had to ruin the most important friendship she had in her life??? If only she wouldn't have done what she did 2 years ago.

It didn't escape Arnav's eyes the pain that flashes through her face.He still could read her like a open book,could decode the emotions that transpired through her pretty eyes.He regretted hurting her so much,but it was for greater good.Sometimes he thought he preferred to remember her as still eight years old because she'd adored him then. She would gladly follow him anywhere. In fact, whenever she saw him leave, heading toward the garden where he liked to walk and think, she would come running after him. Even though she frequently fell, her little legs no match for his long, strong ones she never cried and never complained.She was strong even back then.

Little khushi used to fill their conversation with a million inquisitive questions though, looking at him with trusting big eyes.Her questions made him laugh and stumbled over answers.

When she was eight , he was her Hero.

As soon as the car reached Rajput haveli, she all but sprinted away from him.Arnav sighed grabbing the package from the backseat he also entered the house. As soon as he reached the living room, he was met with Madhumati ji scolding khushi for running around carelessly, even in the age of eighteen and her praying to God to give her 'sanka devi' same 'satbuddhi'. Then there was Roma chachi, she came rushing towards him to give a hug. Roma chachi never failed to make him feel loved.Arnav admired this woman for her enormous capacity to love those who weren't hers.

"london suits you, Arnav bitwa, look at you, how handsome you've turned out to be!!!! "

Arnav returning her hug, teased her "And you didn't change at all Roma chachi. Still as gorgeous as ever. I missed you so much."

Manoroma smilled at him fondly. A child she once wished was hers so that she could have protected him from the heartbreak he endured at such a tender age " I missed you too, bitwa.don't be a stranger now like you have been for past years, ab toh hum ristedaar bhi banne wale hain."

Arnav smilled at her " I'll try."

Manoroma continued,"I hope you are staying with us this time, aren't you?" seeing Arnav nod his head,she continued' " good, now i am going to the temple , we'll talk after I come back. chaliye, madhumati ji."

Arnav watched them leave and then silently proceed toward the first floor crossing the stairs.At the very least, he could try to save whatever left of the friendship he once shared with khushi.

khushi sat cross-legged on her bed, looking at the payal that broke as soon as she entered her room hurriedly few minutes ago. It had been her room since her parents had died.It had seen so many of her tears and hold so many of her secrets.Bua ji now-a-days, began to get on her nerves, reminding everyone of her spinster status,but khushi was adamant not to get married before she enrolled for college, now that she finally did it, she didn't have any excuses left.

Looking at the payal, khushi thought of how it's been almost 10 years that she is wearing that particular payal.In one morning 10 years ago, in the garden, looking at her rag doll, she confessed to Arnav that she used to have a similar payal like her doll once,that the bad guys had stolen from her too. And she missed wearing the payals.It was one of the first things she had admitted to Arnav during their long walks.

He'd asked her why she didn't just ask Mahindar chachu and chachi for payals and khushi had tearfully confessed her fear that if she wanted too much, her new guardians would give her away. And the sound of payals must disturbed them as well.

That very weekend, he'd bought her this payal and it's pair. She'd loved it. It was the first time since her parents died that she'd bounced in places with joy like she was really eight and not eighty.She giggled with her delighted little-girl pleasure.

Khushi stared at the payal with a sad smile on her face.The clasp had gave away.Just like their relationship now.She still remembered how the payals were too big for her small ankles, he had to make a loop at the end to adjust them to her size.

Arnav had adored her once.

But she'd messed that up good and proper a long time ago.But did she really messed it up beyond repair?

A knock on the door drew her thoughts out of the past. To her surprise, it was Arnav standing in the doorway, his expression as passive as ever. "Can I come in?"

She nodded, automatically scooting backward to lean back against her headboard. He came to sit in front of her, and Khushi smirked, remembering playing Ludo with him at that same position, at that same spot when she was 10, 11, 12.

"What are you laughing at?" he asked, curious. A smile played at his lips that made her heart feel like a thunder about to strike.

"I was just remembering beating you in ludo," she said quietly. In her room, it was harder to be aloof as she tried to be with him. How long had she been trying to show him she was grown up, grown past the foolish girl she'd been when they...

His smile broadened but only slightly. Still it was enough to make her blood feel warmer. "So you found a game you can actually beat me at, Phati sari. Don't get arrogant." He pointed a finger in her face.

Laughing lightly, she remembered the origin of her nickname at the kanya puja day, when she was 10, Amma had made her wear a red saree made for little girls. it was so beautiful. She ran to the garden to show it to Arnav where he was helping Babuji to sow the vegetable seeds and end up tearing the pretty saree in that process. She cried the whole day so much that babuji ended up buying two more similar saree just like that.but she couldn't get away from the torment of Arnav's teasing.She gained that nickname a day after. she stared down at her lap, tracing the broken payal with the pad of her finger. He sounded like his old self just then addressing her with the name he gave her, the one who wasn't so uncomfortable and cold around her. 'O Devi maiya, what do she need to sacrifice to have that again.' she sighed and asked "So what did you want to talk about?"

"This is awkward," he said after a moment of silence. "It seems almost pompous for me to say I'm proud of you."

"Why do you think it's pompous?" she asked, curiously. "I mean, everyone else has said it... unless you don't mean it."

"Of course I mean it," he said, his tone sincere. "A graduate degree in English literature" He looked down, then back at her again"You always wanted to be a writer.I am sorry I wasn't there when you enrolled to college, I should have been there." he said with a decisive, displeased tone. "I know I haven't been as supportive as I could have been these last few years."

Khushi shook her head. Arnav had always been something of an enigma to her. Well, not always. There was a time when their relationship had been simple. At some point, something had changed. What that was, Khushi was still at a loss as to explain.She knew when the switchover had happened, though.

"Arnav," she said with a sigh. "If it hadn't been for you, I wouldn't have even tried to get into a college. You have always encouraged me to write and kept me interested with the world of literature with the books you used to send me."He even sent her books when he was avoiding her those last few years.

Looking up at him, she smiled. "you were the only one that never doubted my capabilities. You just seemed so certain I could do it - even if it would be hard."

"Most things worth doing are difficult," he said quietly. "It never occurred to me to doubt you. If that was what you wanted, I knew you were capable."

And because he knew, she believed, she thought but didn't say. "It was difficult. Still, I did it, and I think I made the right choice. You had everything to do with that."

Their silence then was not so awkward, but more comfortable. Then Arnav reminded the package on his hand and extend it to her.As soon as she saw the package, her face brighten with a brilliant smile and she all but tore the packaging of the book. 'A tale of two cities by Charles Dickens ' It's her favourite book, but it was special.

"you brought me the first edition" she looked in awe both at the book and at the man.When the awe subsided awakardness seeped in. Arnav was about to leave.

"Arnav," she began hurriedly, blowing out a breath in a huff, she was ready to right wrongs in her life, start fresh. "I know you've been... wary about seeing me since... since then. And I don't blame you. I know things have been strange for a long time. But I was a stupid girl then. A lot has changed - I've changed. I'm not going to... do that again. So if that's what you're worried about-"

"khushi" he said quickly, reaching across the space that separated them, putting his index finger over her lips.

For the space of a few breaths, khushi's heartbeat began to stutter. Time stand still, their breaths catched.She didn't know how long it had been since she was watching his hooded eyes,looking at his dilated pupil.

And then a moment later, a curtain seemed to fall over his expressive eyes,hiding all the secrets she so despately wanted to reveal, his eyes holding hers. He let his hand drop slowly before he broke eye contact, staring out the window. For long moments, he was silent. "It's not you. It's never been you."

She waited, but he didn't seem inclined to explain further. "Is it so unthinkable ?" she asked finally. She cringed because she'd feared the answer to this question for years. He was her best friend, her confidant - the most important person in her life since almost before she could remember. That had never changed.And she didn't wanted to lose him. she would take him in whatever capabilities he would like to share with her.

"Is what so unthinkable?" he asked, dreading the answer himself.

"Can't we try to be friends again?" Her voice was quiet, and she struggled to make it not waiver. It felt strangely like her world would crumble if he put the final nail in the coffin of their relationship, as melodramatic as that sounded.

To her surprise, his eyes were wide, almost horrified. "Oh, Khushi ." He shook his head, chuckling nervously. He thought she would ask about something else. "I never imagined you would interpret my attitude that way." He rubbed a hand over his chin, tracing the line of stubble - it had been some days since he'd shaved. She'd noticed that almost instantly when he walked in the door.She still remembered the way that little bit of stubble felt, brushing against her cheek.

"To answer your question, of course we can be friends. I've never not been your friend," he said finally.

This cheered her considerably, and Khushi sat up straight, smiling. "Good."

@arshifiesta @featheredclover @phuljari @msbhagirathi

#ipkknd #iss pyaar ko kya naam doon #arnav singh raizada #khushi kumari gupta #arshi #ipk 13th anniversary fiesta #hand picked star

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danieyells · 1 day

Note

After Hotaburi's chapter i was very curious about Zenji voicelines! Can i ask for them, please?

@yuri-is-online YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT OVERWHELMING ME although I appreciate the concern!! If I get overwhelmed or need a break I just put it aside until I'm ready or have the time and energy and attention span or ideas if necessary haha so no need to worry there 'u' (Also. . .good luck with those fics lolol)

ZENJI IS OUR LAST BOI. Until we get Ed and Lyca anyway. Which will honestly probably be in like. A week or two. Possibly less. I had my suspicions when I first read his that he was a ghost lol knowing he is. . .it gives them a little different feeling I guess haha.

Default:

"Why, hello there, my dear. Suppose we kick off another swanky day here?"

"You want to know the meaning of my words? I see— I'll have to give you a lecture on romanticism."

"What's this? Well, it's a biwa, of course. It's a biwa just as you are yourself."

what does that mean tho. . .i mean i get what it means but also it feels like it must mean something. . . .

"Girls, be ambitious... Dream big, my dear."

proud women enjoyer zenji kotodama

"A man who's everywhere but can be found nowhere... That's what it means to be an inspired man of the quill."

i think that's just what it means to be a ghost bby. . . . . . . . . . .

"Heh. There's no doubt about it. Zenji Kotodama is once again the most styling man on campus. These glad rags are the cat's pajamas."

You've Got Mail:

"Come now, read those messages out, won't you? They're fan letters for me, aren't they? ...They're not?"

Affinity 1:

"Come now, let's depart in search of something sensational."

Affinity 2:

"Oh, have you come to see me? This is troubling. I'm afraid I'm out of autographs."

where have you been distributing them. . .?

Affinity 3:

"What am I doing here? ...I'm people-watching."

Affinity 4:

"Ordinarily I ask for write-ins for my advice salon on the World Wide Web...but tonight, I'm taking it out into the field."

i wonder if he's waiting to encounter people who'll be able to see and hear him or if he's just like. . .genuinely ignoring/forgetting/disregarding that he isn't seen or heard. . .or maybe he was ignored a lot in his lifetime too so he doesn't question that people don't respond. . . .

Affinity 5:

"The moon is beautiful... I always look forward to passing the hours in conversation with you and Towa on nights like these."

i thought you didn't hang around jabberwock after dark because the dark was dangerous tho. . .maybe if the moon is big and bright he doesn't mind because it's not as dark lolol

Affinity 6:

"My folktale videos? I filmed them at Haku's behest, but I can't imagine these old things will capture my fans' hearts..."

based on that the Urashima Taro video has his voice in it but his character story recording doesn't have him or his voice in it(and Haku deliberately tries to make the background interesting because he knows it'll only be the background and biwa sounds,) I think his voice can be recorded but if he's visibly in the recording it won't be captured? That or Haku has recording equipment that can capture ghost voices, but not images???

Affinity 7:

"It truly is the age of YouTube. Can you fathom the romance of my artistry spreading to all four corners of the globe?"

Affinity 8:

"Every tool has its own knack you've got to acquire to use it properly. Behold— my mastery with a fishing pole!"

Affinity 9:

"This doll here is special. The moment I met him I felt a destiny such that I knew we couldn't be strangers."

Affinity 10:

"Oh, I didn't mean to give you a fright... I ought to have expected this. A sudden brush with an inspired man of the quill would take anyone's breath away."

Affinity 11:

"Have you got any siblings, my dear? Why no, I don't mean anything by it. Just a little morning conversation."

i can imagine him looking fondly at his doll as he says he doesn't mean anything by it. His sibling isn't one of the most important things in the world to him or anything. He's just making conversation. btw in Japanese he says "morning talk" which sounds an awful lot like "pillow talk" to me and idk how many people would be comfortable discussing their siblings after the deed--

Affinity 12:

"Are you going to Mortkranken, my dear? ...I see. No, I don't mean anything by it. Are you hurt? I hope you'll take care."

so while it makes sense for Zenji to ask this as he is noted in his profile to be a worrywart, not to mention he died on campus, but also. . .y'know, theories.

Affinity 13:

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sneak up on you. Apparently my footsteps give the general students the heebie-jeebies..."

In Japanese it does clarify that he moves without the sound of footsteps at all because the general students freak out hearing his footsteps since they can't see him

Affinity 14:

"A swanky morning calls for a swanky breakfast, and some swanky radio calisthenics."

apparently radio calisthenics are still pretty popular in japan. in any case man are you sure you died like a year ago you sound so old

Affinity 15:

"Why, Subaru hasn't risen yet. Go ahead and wake him, won't you, my dear? I'll accompany your efforts from here with my biwa."

Affinity 16:

"A burst of inspiration has taken hold of me... No. The ghost of artistry has possessed my soul!"

okay well be careful with ghosts taking over your soul you don't have a ton left if you lose that--

Affinity 17:

"To be a Darkwick student is to greet danger as an old friend... But I hope that Haku and Subaru have a long life ahead of them."

Affinity 18:

"Zenji Kotodama is a wonderful name, don't you think? A sensational name befitting of my sensational sensibilities."

this line and the meanings of "Zenji" and "Kotodama" make me think it's a pseudonym lol most people don't praise their own names like that y'know? of course zenji isn't most people but. . . .

Affinity 19:

"Trouble sleeping? Then I'll read you a story. How about Urashima Taro?"

Affinity 20:

"I was standing by your pillow last night? Horsefeathers, I'd never. I was there the night before last."

BABY I DON'T THINK THAT'S BETTER. YOU ARE STILL WATCHING THEM SLEEP. WHAT ELSE DO YOU WATCH THEM DO.

Affinity 21:

"Go ahead and eat. No, don't give me another thought—I'm on a diet, you see. Watching you is enough food for my soul."

you see why i suspected initially that he didn't know he was dead? can you eat at all buddy?? i don't think it's a diet if you've lost the ability to consume food. . . .

Affinity 22:

"Haku's busy today—film me in his stead, won't you?"

Affinity 23:

"I've got a little story about a hapless fool of a man... I'm sure it's hardly worth listening to. I wonder if I'll ever get the chance to share it with you?"

the true stories seem like the ones he wants to avoid. . .'a hapless fool of a man's story that isn't worth listening to but i'd still like to share' sounds an awful lot like it must be about him and his life. . . . In Japanese he says 「救いようのない、馬鹿な男の物語さ」 "it's the story of an irredeemable/hopeless, stupid man.". . .who did you hurt, Zenji?

Affinity 24:

"To be able to look into your eyes and bid you good night... I'm the luckiest fella for miles around."

Affinity 25(max):

"Maybe we did meet too late. But it's all right. I promise I'll find you in the next life."

but. . .but we have this life. . .although this is one of the few acknowledgements he really gives of his own ghostly nature. He wants to be able to live with you. To be tangibly there for you, to touch you and support you, to be able to show you off to others. . .but he can't be recognized. He can't be seen or heard but by a select few, it's only thanks to Haku that he can be seen or heard by you. It's too late for something 'real' now. So he can plan for the future. For the next life. He'll find you when you're both alive and then you can do everything you'd want to do with a real physical boyfriend. He promises.

Spring:

"In spring, the dawn... Red tinges the slowly paling mountain rim... Ah... These mountain fellas must've been goofy for some doll..."

"There is hope buried under the cherry trees... It means that spring is the season of chance encounters."

isn't the like. rumor that cherry blossoms are pink because they dye their petals with the blood of corpses buried beneath them or something? i swear i read that somewhere. apparently it comes from a poem. is hope a body buried under a sakura tree. is that where they buried you, Zenji?

"The cherry blossoms of Hotarubi are ephemeral—they bloom only to be quickly washed away by the rain. But I am rather fond of that way of life."

Zenji simultaneously lives in Acceptance and Denial stages of grief it seems lol

"The beauty of the cherry blossoms under the night sky inspired me to pick up my pen... Oh, it has gotten easier to lift."

Summer:

"Have you seen him!? Who? Why, my doll, of course! This is very troubling. I've got to find him before the boogeymen stir!"

. . .somehow this reminds me of the Jiro dialogue where he's like "if Yuri asks where I am, tell him i went to bed, i'm going out" lol if the doll reminds him of Jiro, it seems to make sense that now and then it wanders off on its own. I wonder where it's going though?

"My ideal summer vacation? I wish to lay down my burdens in the springs of Yugawara and pursue my wordsmithery in peace, as so many greats have done before me."

Yugawara is a hot spring town in Japan! Apparently since the Meiji era people would go there for inspiration and such thanks to the atmosphere

"This master wordsmith studied by the light of fireflies... I see. Haku! Turn out the lights!"

"I heard a frightful rumor... Apparently the ghost of a dead student has been spotted around Hotarubi..."

THAT'S YOU. YOU ARE THE SCARY GHOST OF A DEAD STUDENT. PEOPLE CAN SEE YOU MORE BECAUSE IT'S SUMMER.

Autumn:

"Fall is the perfect season for a new book, and I have the perfect one for you... From inspired man of the quill Zenji Kotodama, the fruit of his sweat and blood... "Body.""

"A song for you in the season of the arts... From inspired lute priest Zenji Kotod— Wait, where are you going!?"

why is this the one time 'biwa' is translated to 'lute' lol. . .although 'lute priest' does sound way better than 'biwa priest'

"Gauging the literary significance of this video by something as insignificant as views... Horsefeathers, isn't it?"

yeah!!! don't judge your worth by views or follows, zenji!!!

"I've decided to make you the heroine of my next work... A beautiful princess who bites into a poisoned apple and falls into a deep slumber... and seven of you!"

a fascinating retelling of Snow White. . .Snow White And The Seven Snow Whites. . . .

Winter:

"Good morning, fellas! Time for my biwa recital to color the chill of this frigid sunrise! I call it "Six O'Clock in the Morning.""

zenji nO PEOPLE ARE TRYNA SLEEP

"There's a rumor going around that you can hear a biwa playing in the music room when no one's there... I go all the time though, and I've never heard it..."

again. . .that's because it's you. . . .

"The setting sun... The sky dyed purple... Your beautiful profile, obscured... (gasp) I've been struck by inspiration!! My dear, I have to leave you here!"

"Are you cold? Then let me warm you up... My dear, why are you scooting away? I'll only make you colder...?"

it really seems like he forgets he's a ghost pretty often lmao

His birthday:

"Is this...a birthday present...? (hic) (sob) I'm the luckiest fella around...!"

people don't give him gifts often huh. . . .

Your birthday:

"I've planned the perfect day to celebrate the miracle of your birth... We'll start with an ode to you, accompanied by my biwa."

he planned you a whole outing or maybe a party! with all day musical accompaniment!! What a sweetheart!!

New Years:

"Happy New Year, my dear. I'll be making the first shrine visit with Haku—care to join us?"

Valentine's Day:

"My dear...is this for me? (hic) (sob) I'll treasure it always...!"

well given he probably can't eat it. . .fair reaction

White Day:

"I'm sorry... I did try to explain that a biwa recital would make a better gift, but Haku insisted I present you with confections instead..."

thanks haku you a real one lmao although music wouldn't be bad just. . . .

April Fool's Day:

"No, I would never lie to you. An inspired man spins fiction with his quill, not his mouth, after all."

y'know, i love the honesty! you keep making stories and being open, zenji!

Halloween:

"Why, you gave me quite a fright in that getup! What a marvelously queer celebration this is! So this is the legacy of westernization..."

no the marvelously queer celebrations are in june. although halloween is also marvelously queer sometimes--

Christmas:

"Merry Christmas! I've completed a new fairy tale. May my wishes reach the hearts of children everywhere..."

not a gift for you, but for the children! can a ghoul ghost and a human have--

Idle:

"...And they lived happily ever after. How did you like my new story? I'd love to hear your— What? You weren't listening!?"

"Can you see me? Phew... You've been so quiet, you had me worried, my dear."

Absent:

"Ah, I'm so relieved you're all right, my dear. I wondered if something had happened on a mission... I'm glad my fears had no teeth."

THAT'S ALL OF EM. He's really. . .he is himself the whole way through huh lol. At the same time when he does acknowledge his ghostliness(and oftentimes he does the exact opposite, simply lacking in self-awareness) he seems a little lonely and regretful. . .I wonder if he was always such a worrywart or if he started worrying more after he died, realizing first hand just how dangerous things could be. I'm surprised how feel acknowledgements his doll gets, although I don't think he carries it on the home screen?

I wonder how different his personality was when he was alive. Probably not very different tbh.

ANYWAY IT IS HALF PAST MIDNIGHT FOR ME. BEDTIME.

#zenji kotodama #danie yells at tokyo debunker #danie yells answers #danie yells with anons #yuri is online #datamining cw #now i just have to go back through and fill out the ones i left out for everyone. . . .#a concern for a danie from another day lol #tokyo debunker

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l0tt1emy · 14 hours

Text

Girlfriend privileges

Lottie Matthews x F!reader

Summary: After Jackie passes the lead to Lottie for a few weeks, the rest of the team isn't so happy

It felt more like a nightmare to be honest

while the girls were spending the last of their energy every day training all day and arriving at their respective homes only in the early hours of the morning, some getting scolded by their parents but in the end it would pay off, it probably couldn't get any worse

Jackie Taylor was in charge of being the leader this year, but she didn't have the golden patience to be the leader, you and Shauna had a little fight a while ago for a silly reason, and in training you had to train together forcibly, and Jackie didn't know deal with that

" Don't you look where you are, you idiot?" Shauna shouts from the other side of the lawn, attracting the attention of Laura Lee and Natalie who sighs "Fuck you shauna" you retaliate rolling your eyes" Are you too busy looking at your girlfriend or some shit?" "Stop!" Jackie screams when she sees how close you and Shauna are, her screams making no difference

"Maybe you should go and have sex with the boys your best friend looks for you, that way your mouth will be too busy for you to talk shit" you retort "Randy, his name isn't he?" You step back when you see Jackie running to at least try to alleviate the situation that seemed like it couldn't get any worse

Shauna approaches you and for a second it looks like she's going to hit you, then dramatically Jackie jumps in front of you and lands embarrassingly on the ground before Shauna can take it out on you, a loud scream echoing out and making everyone on the lawn look at Jackie, damn it. she looked destroyed there

"You are an idiot Jackie?" natalie screams

and this caused a lot of problems, since the beginning of the year, the team wouldn't stop fighting, every time they got together and it became a law, not to put you or taissa with shauna, or it could turn into a murder, and jackie was the only person who put order there

Jackie's leg seemed to be twisted, it was a real horror, on one side Laura Lee was praying, on the other Misty was trying to touch Jackie's leg and the coach was roughly pushing her away, the rest of the girls looked like statues as they looked at you and Shauna

Jackie made all the girls gather at her hospital bed, receiving sighs and low curses over her, it looked like a wake and no one even knew what they were doing there

And it was worse than some thought, she started giving a speech about you and shauna having to be friends and some shit like that, and started saying that she would probably never walk again that it showed she cared about the team "That doesn't even make sense" Taissa says and is interrupted "Please let me finish"

"I'm going to choose someone to be the leader" "For just a while of course, no one can replace me" Mari closes her eyes and rubs her temples when she sees laura lee raise her hand

"And the chosen person is the most trustworthy here, I would choose Laura Lee but...I think she is too good for that?" Jackie gives Laura Lee a smile when she sees her frown with a disappointed expression

"Lottie"

" You have got to be kidding"

𐂂

"Mari, you're not catching the ball, try again now with Gen"

That was the phrase that Lottie kept repeating over and over for the last 2 hours of training that seemed to turn into 10 hours, the team formation being extremely confused without Jackie, which was to be expected.

"I swear if I hear that word again I'll have wished I was Jackie" Van says, leaning on the goal rail

"We can't go on like this, I know Jackie was too important to lead us, but nationals are coming up" Lottie murmurs breathlessly "I'm going to have to be tough with you guys"

"What the fuck is this lottie?" nat starts to protest running over to lottie and rolling her eyes " You think you're fucking Tommy Shelby?" Natalie says raising an eyebrow

"Who is this" "It doesn't matter"

" The next person who loses the ball will have to walk the length of the pitch 3 times" Lottie says firmly

All the girls sigh but Lottie is unfazed by the curses, insults and even things almost being thrown in her face directly by Van "Are you kidding me?" Taissa snorts and looks at you "Your girlfriend is crazy! We should do some ritual to get Jackie back"

"Nothing to complain about, let's see if Mari doesn't lose the ball now" lottie and mari exchange looks and mari gives an arrogant smile and rolls her eyes, positioning herself while lottie returns to her seat

Training continues and the ball passes from Natalie to Mari, for the first time in the game, and Lottie raises an eyebrow, analyzing

You run to the other side and try to pull the ball from mari, who was already close to your goal, putting strength in your legs that you swear are going to roll over. Now you get closer to mari's legs and are about to turn the ball over when mari gives you One final push and the ball lands in the goal easily, damn it.

The whistle blows and you whimper looking at the girls running to the water fountain, you run to Lottie "I don't want to do this shit" you mumble, shaking your head in denial repeatedly "You are not going" Your eyes widen in genuine surprise and you raise an eyebrow

While the rest of the girls enter, some talking and others panting drinking water, Laura Lee is the first to arrive and sits on the floor "Why isn't she running yet" Shauna's voice resonates "She doesn't need to run" silence

"What!" Mari shouts entering "But would I have to run?" she snorts, crossing her arms "I changed my mind, let's start with who lost the ball for the first time" Lottie says firmly

"If that's so then, she should start in the last training she let Laura Lee fall" they all nod and look at you "It's been a long time, just accept it, besides, Laura Lee is always in the front getting in the way"

Laura Lee widens her eyes and looks away "No offense" she looks at Laura Lee and raises her thumb which is ignored

" That was 4 days ago" Taisa argues to Lottie and she just denies it "That doesn't justify it"

"You're only doing this because she's your girlfriend"

"No, she has this privilege because she's my girlfriend, it's different" Lottie says bluntly

"lottie!"

#yellowjackets #lottie yellowjackets #lottie matthews x reader #yellowjacket x reader #yellowjackets fic #lottie mathews #lottie matthews #lottie mathews x reader

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babyseraphim · 2 days

Text

Here's a scrap of writing about Charles and Edwin's relationship that I deleted from a fic and likely won't use in anything else (for context, this fic takes place 10 years after they met, so their relationship is still developing):

All Charles has ever tried to do is treat Edwin with understanding. Charles knows that he isn’t always able to understand exactly what Edwin is going through, but he’s long since decided that Edwin will never go through any of it alone again. He is determined to be someone that Edwin can depend on, someone that will protect him from a world that seems intent on beating him down at every turn.

When he was alive, Charles often took pride in the amount of compassion and consideration he was able to spare for others. As much as those around him had insisted, though, Charles knew that his kindness did not come naturally. His immediate reaction to most adverse situations was anger, burning hot and raging like a wildfire. It terrified him, thinking his anger could spin out of his control someday. His father’s anger had burned twice as hot and three times as long, often resulting in the destruction of people around him. Those people, unfortunately, were most often Charles and his mother. As he grew older, Charles had promised himself that he would never inflict the same fear and harm on others that his father had inflicted on him. He took it upon himself to become a peacemaker, putting himself in the middle of hostile situations as often as he could. Charles’ short life had been filled with pain and rejection, and the idea of anyone else being forced to feel the way Charles felt made his stomach churn. It became a habit, after a while, to always act as kindly and compassionately as he possibly could. Even though Charles expected no reward in return for his kind gestures, it had always seemed unfair that so few people in his life were intent on returning the gesture. His compassion is what ended up getting him killed in the end, but he still couldn’t bring himself to regret the decisions he made. Not when it had led him to Edwin.

Though Edwin is not one to naturally offer reassurances or heart-felt admissions, Charles knows that his daily presence must be significant for Edwin in some way. It has to be, otherwise Edwin would not have put up with his near-constant company and incessantly playful behavior for the last decade. It’s no secret that Edwin had lived quite an isolated life before his death, but it seems as though his seclusion has somehow grown to include Charles’ presence in the afterlife. Charles is eternally grateful for that fact.

#dead boy detectives #dbda #dbdshow #edwin payne #charles rowland #my writing

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martiandmichelle · 3 days

Text

OK, it's time to tell the story all my friends are on me to tell. . .

I'll start by explaining this blurry photo (as taken by my associate Kaatje). The morning the Southeast exhibition of my Agency opened (at 9:00 am) those of us who had a display booth were asked to be ready for an inspection by the staff beginning at 7:30. The convention center was nice enough to open for us at 5:30. The previous night I had gotten a call from one of the organizers asking if I could be ready by 7:00 and I'm like "Sure!" since I'm a morning person anyway. I arrived at 6:00 dressed as in the photo (it was unusually cold outside for early Spring). As many of you know who have attended these kind of things, the flow when you walk into the arena is usually you go right and the last booth you see are the ones of the far left. Well, I was the far left booth - though it was an unusually large booth. So I should be the last one anybody visits, right? Well, read on.

The lady pictured whose booth was next to mine was an absolute riot - friendly and funny. She's a 6'4" trans lady named Melodee. She and I hit it off immediately: short me with the monster boobs and tall Melodee with the long legs and schlong. We had chatted for maybe 10 minutes when I grabbed my bag to go change (after agreeing to go with her and her trans friends to a bar that night - "they're going to LOVE you!" she said) when suddenly her smile change to a gasp with an OMG look on her face. "What?" I asked.

"It's him, it's Mr. G------! The global CEO!" She acted like she was putting something on a table in her booth when there was actually nothing in her hand. "Be careful," she said quietly. "He's an absolute bastard." Then she exclaimed "And, oh fuck, he's coming this way!"

Melodee was suddenly a nervous wreck. I wasn't sure what to do; I mean, I've fucked my share of wealthy, powerful men and stared down plenty of assholes in the past so I just held on to my bag and smiled as he approached.

As he approached a big smile lit his face. "Good morning, ladies," he said as he got close. "You're Melodee, right?" he said shaking her hand. "What's wrong?" he then asked her shocked face.

"Nothing, sir. I mean I'm just surprised you remember my name," she answered.

"Not at all," he said. "It's important to remember someone's name, and, besides, I hear good things about you. Congratulations!" She blushed and nodded a thank you. He turned to me. "And you must be Miss Marti. I've been dying to meet you!" He reached out his hand and I took it. "Very anxious to meet you indeed," he repeated then bent and kissed my hand. I could see Melodee behind him mouth a long "Wooooow!" in my direction. He turned to Melodee and asked "May I borrow your neighbor for a few minutes?" She nodded and he directed me to the back of my booth.

"But you are at a disadvantage," he said when we turned to face each other. "Here, my name is Bas. Well, Bas G-------. But I won't you to call me Bas," he seemed more nervous than I felt. "It is only fair for me to say that I am the Global CEO of -------------- (my Agency) but I want you to forget that. I am here this morning because I wanted to tell you without others around that I am a huge fan of yours." His eyes roved to my chest, stayed for a few seconds then came back to my face. "Yes, a VERY BIG fan. And I wanted to thank you for all you do for the Agency's business and for my eyes - and, well, other parts, too!"

Where was this asshole Melodee warned me about? He was being very nice and charming. Bas was tall, the same height as Melodee, gray haired, nice looking, and fit, especially for a man in his late 60's. But I was most impressed by how this very wealthy and, in this circle at least, very powerful man only wanted to talk about me. So we had a very pleasant 15 minute talk, we laughed some, he spent a lot of time staring at my breasts - which I enjoyed - and then he had me autograph one of my photos for him.

When he took my hand to say goodbye, he had one last thing to add. "I am, unfortunately, very busy with business this weekend during the show, but I have cleared my lunch time today. Would you join me?" I said "yes" and he beamed, made our lunch plans, then left to spend a bit of time with the other girls and guys who were showing.

When he was away from Melodee and I she grabbed my arm as I left to go change. "Girl," she said. "That man adores you!" I waved her off and went to change.

I'll stop there. More to come!

Marti

#marti

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lemonzestywrites · 1 day

Note

Hi zesty! I have two if that’s alright. The omega Eddie fic, and AFOLATWCS (my beloved) pleeeeeeease 💗💗

hi baz ofc!! a two for one deal! i hope you enjoy

omega!eddie fic

“How close is it?” Buck asks, turning towards Eddie. Eddie takes a shallow breath. “Close,” he mutters, shifting along the pillows. “I’ve been feeling off the last few days. When I woke up today, it was so much worse; I realized I felt the same way I did last time. I called Bobby. He gave me a week off and said I could take more if I needed to.” Buck nods to himself. “Is there anything you need specifically?” A humorless laugh prises itself from Eddie's core. “Besides getting bred till I pass out?” he mutters dryly. Buck feels his heart skyrocket in his throat. Wait, if they’re actually doing this, does that mean- “I’m on birth control, Buck, calm down.” Buck snaps his attention over to Eddie, who’s giving him that knowing look. One so uniquely Eddie that he recognizes immediately. One to tell him it’s okay. They’re both okay. Buck huffs a small laugh, still never unimpressed at how well his best friend seems to know him.

a foundation of trust and love we cannot see

A sudden little voice of intrigue comes fluttering from the back of his mind in curious excitement. “What would you be doing? You know, like, what would your dream job be if firefighting wasn’t an option?” Buck asks, with a soft tilt of his head. He’s not entirely sure he’s asked Eddie this before, which honestly feels a little shocking considering how long they’ve known each other. There’s a short pause resting between the question and Eddie’s answer. “Promise you won’t laugh.” Buck furrows his brows. “Of course, I wouldn’t.” Unless it was something like super fucking hilarious cause then Buck has a contractual obligation to laugh. But if Eddie’s pensiveness about the whole thing is any indication, Buck has a decent feeling that’s not the case here. “I’d be a nurse,” Eddie says after a moment. Oh. “Why would I laugh at that?” Buck asks with a raised brow. “Nurses are the backbone of the healthcare industry.” Buck, of all people, should absolutely know that, considering he’s been hospitalized nearly Guinness World Record-breaking amount of times. They really should start giving him those little punch cards for all his trouble. (Get sent to the ER 10 times and get 1 CT Scan Free!) “I know that,” Eddie sighs. “I mean, realistically, if I didn’t go into the army, I’d probably be working for my dad, but before Shannon got pregnant, I was considering what to do, career-wise. Nursing was one of my options.”

#911 #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddie #zestywrites #afotalwcs #omega!eddie fic

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skkfujoshi · 2 days

Text

Got addicted to a losing game

In his three year stint as a mafia member,Chuuya had never been caught up in an explosion.

He could only watch in horror as,50 feet below him,the burning schrapnel of his car flew every which way.

A few more eruptions sounded and as the last one faded out,Chuuya slowly lowered himself,barely breathing .

As soon as he touched the ground,Chuuya’s feet gave out from under him,the redhead collapsing to the floor.

That could’ve been him. That could’ve been him. That could’ve been him.

He put his hand to his heart.Beating,beating strong and steady.Good.

He’s ok,he’s alive,he’s fine.

“-uuya!Chuuya!Chuuya!”a familiar voice yelled,coming from behind him.

Chuuya turned towards the sound and saw Dazai climbing over the metal fence of the airport parking lot and jumping to the asphalt,sprinting towards Chuuya as if his life was depending on it.

Before Chuuya could even say a word,Dazai was in front of Chuuya on his knees as well,pulling him into a tight embrace.

“Are you ok?!” “Yeah…Yeah,I’m fine.I got above it with ‘Tainted’…I’m fine…”

The two sat there in silence for a bit,Dazai holding him close still,nails buried into Chuuya’s hair.Chuuya wrapped his arm around Dazai,still a bit surprised by the gesture.The two of them had their nicer moments,but hugging never happened,especially not a hug this tight.

“Nice to have you back,hat rack.” “Nice to be back,bandage waste.”Chuuya said,burying his face into the crook of Dazai’s neck

His eyes widened.

Wood?Dazai never smelled like that.

“So,how was-“ “You smell weird.” “What are you talking about?” “You don’t reek of crab.You actually smell like a forest or something.” “Oh,don’t mind that,just some new cologne I’m trying out,that’s all .”Dazai said,letting go of Chuuya and helping him up

And Chuuya could’ve accepted that explanation.Except his eyes slipped to Dazai’s shoes.There was dried mud there.

Before he boarded his flight from France to Yokohama,Chuuya had checked the weather.It was gonna rain at Yokohama at 8PM

It was 9:30 now.

“Chuuya?”

And Dazai ran to him over the fence that was turned towards the woods…Which would explain the smell…

“Dazai,what are you doing here?”

“To see you of course.”Dazai said,lie coming out with ease And while Chuuya seemed to consider it for a second,his brows quickly furrowed and face hardened,blue eyes meeting brown.

“I sent you a text that I was gonna be here at 10:30.You responded to it.”

Shit.

“You didn’t mention any long distance mission in that text.And I didn’t tell you the schedule changed.And even if I did,why wouldn’t you arrive here with an escort?In a car?”Chuuya continued,volume rising as he took hold of Dazai’s shirt

Ango was gonna kill him…

“Chuuya,listen-“ “Tell me the truth,Osamu,I swear to God,if you lie to me,I swear you will regret it.”his partner spat

Dazai had never felt as scrutinized as he did in that very moment,those ocean blue eyes judging every little twitch.

There was a chance here.A once in a lifetime chance.

He could take Chuuya away,right here,right now.Take him into the light.Spill his guts and run like there’s no tomorrow.

But to take Chuuya away from this would also take him away from Koyo.

From Kaiji.

From Rūynosuke.

So he told him something that was,in essence,true,yet not the truth.

“There was a mission and Odasaku died on it.I got mad at your dad,so I decided to run off here to get back at him.”

Instantly,the anger in Chuuya’s face evaporated,replaced by sympathy and grief.His hand slipped to Dazai’s shoulder as he slowly shook his head.

“Dazai I…I’m so sor-“ “Don’t,Chuuya.Please.”

He couldn’t bear to hear Chuuya apologize.Not when he was about to abandon him in such a short time,wrong him like he was about to.

“It’s ok.You didn’t know and you were worried.It’s fine.” “Still…Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?”

Dazai’s selfish mind sounded,as loud as police sirens.

“Hug me,tell me it’s all gonna be ok and that you’re gonna come with me.That nothing bad will come of that,that it won’t hurt you.That I was right to tell you.”

But none of that came out,Dazai wouldn’t allow it to.

“Tell me about France?”he offered

While concern was still etched in Chuuya’s face,he nodded,letting Dazai’s arm wrap around his shoulder and lead him away from the car wreckage.

“Did you get the guy?” “Jules Verne?Yeah,I did,relatively early on,like two days in.Took him out and then enjoyed the rest of my ‘mission’.”Chuuya said,with a small smug smile on his face

Dazai chuckled.

“I didn’t know you had it in you.Wonder what your father will say when I tell him.”

Chuuya punched him in the arm as they sat down,backs against the fence.He leaned his head against Dazai’s shoulder and squeezed his arm.

“Don’t even think about it.” “Or what?” “I’ll kill you.”

Dazai thought on it for a bit and then nodded to himself.

“Still telling him.” “Dick.” “Pipsqueak.”

They snorted and sat quietly for a bit,until Dazai asked:”Verne could see 80 days into the future,right?” “Yeah.”

A former member of the Trancendents,Verne’s ability ‘Around the world in 80 days’ allowed him to see 80 days into the future of any person he touched.

“Did he see yours?”Dazai asked Chuuya sort of froze at that.

“I see a trail of bodies,a betrayal…You…On the brink of death and unrecognizable…”

“No.”Chuuya said”I killed him before he could even lay a hand on me.” “Couldn’t be me.I’d bug him until he got to day 80.” “So you could see if you finally got that suicide with a beautiful woman?” “Yup.Really,Chuuya,what a wasted opportunity.”Dazai scolded,shaking his head like a dissapointed parent

Chuuya rolled his eyes.

“C’est la vie,mon amie.” “Stop being a show off.I swear,ever since Verlaine’s been teaching you French you’ve been insufferable.”he whined. “Non.” “Nerd.”Dazai coughed out “My ‘nerdiness’ aside…How long do you intend to stay out to spite my dad?”

Chuuya moved his head off of Dazai’s shoulder to get a better look at his partner’s face.Only to see that Dazai was basically craning his neck to avoid even the slightest chance of them making eye contact.

Not a new thing by any means,but infinitely more annoying when it happened after Chuuya asked a question.Luckily,there was a solution for it.

Reaching over with his free hand,he grabbed Dazai’s jaw and turned his partners face towards his own,Dazai making a small whine.

“Ow,owie,ow…Pain,ouch…”Dazai deadpanned “Answer my question and I’ll let you go ‘Zai.” “But I don’t wanna…” “And I don’t wanna be partners with a brat,guess neither of us are winning,huh?” Dazai sighed,sinking into Chuuya’s touch and taking hold of the hand holding his jaw,stroking it with his own.

Chuuya blinked,taken aback.

He wished to ask Dazai what the hell was that about but then he answered Chuuya’s first question.

“Just a bit more…A few more days and I’ll come back to you.” “…Ok.”

They stayed like that for a moment,Chuuya still holding Dazai’s face though his hands moved to hold his cheeks.He saw Dazai’s eyes widen for a moment when Chuuya’s thumb swiped across it.Chuuya began to let go only for Dazai to tighten his hold on Chuuya’s hand.

“Dazai?” “Just…A few more moments.”Dazai said,leaning his forehead against Chuuya’s

“Chuuya?” “Yes?” “If I couldn’t find a beautiful woman to commit suicide with…Would you do it with me?”

Chuuya’s eyes widened and his nails dug into Dazai’s cheek.Just enough to prick,just slightly.

“You haven’t though…Right?” “No,no,of course not.I’d rather get tortured then commit double suicide with you,but…If I did,would you do it with me?”

This was the moment of truth,one final test.Chuuya was quiet for a bit,a deep hum leaving his lips.

“I…I can’t say I’d jump at the opportunity,but if there truly was no way to convince you to change your mind…I’d do it.” “You’d do it?Even though it’d hurt your loved ones?” “You’re my best friend,’Samu.I wouldn’t want you to be alone.”

And that’s when Dazai knew.He couldn’t take Chuuya.Not because of family.Not because Chuuya didn’t belong in the light.

But because he could never look Chuuya in the eyes and think he could repay him.

Chuuya wouldn’t even hate him for asking,wouldn’t even hold it against Dazai.He’d be doing it for someone he loves and for Chuuya…that was an unquestionable good.Nothing to regret about it.

“Dazai?” “Hmm?” “Your eyes are leaking."

Dazai touched his cheek and sure enough…It was wet.He chuckled.

"Can't you just say that I'm crying,like a normal person? "I refuse to believe that you can cry.I just refuse to believe it,it's too far fetched." “Rude,so very rude.” "So…Why are you crying?" "I just…You're a good man.”

Chuuya blinked at him,cheeks reddening.He gave Dazai a small smile and tilted his head.

“Where the hell did this come from?” “Just felt like saying it,I suppose.”

Chuuya hummed,wiping away what little was left of Dazai’s tears,his nose pressing against the brunette’s.

“Don’t cry again.You’re an ugly crier.” “Look,not all of us are pretty criers.If we were the balance of the universe would be disrupted.”

Chuuya blinked at him in confusion then laughed.

“Shut up,idiot.” “You know.for the record…You’re my best friend too.”

Chuuuya’s cheeks went an even darker red at that as he pouted and narrowed his eyes at Dazai,pinching the brunette’s cheeks.

“Owie.” “I told you to shut up.”

Dazai didn’t know where he got the guts to say the sentence that left his mouth next.

“Make me.”he said

And while it seemed to throw Chuuya for a moment,that was also all the time it took for him to act on it.A moment.

And then Chuuya Nakahara was kissing him.And Dazai was kissing back.It was a bit clumsy at first,lips pressing into one another uncomfortably,but a quick adjustment of angle took care of that,their mouths slotting together as if they were made for nothing more.

Chuuya’s hands creeped into Dazai’s hair,fingers simply rummaging trough it.Not forceful in the slightest,as if they had all the time in the world.

Dazai’s hands were on the sides of Chuuya’s neck,feeling his rapid heartbeat under his palms.

Then they seperated, caught their breath and started again.Dazai thought they could probably go for a while.It was only 9:50 and Chuuya wasn’t expected till 10:30.Fifty minutes of kissing Chuuya was honestly-

A car horn blared,loud and shrill.The two turned,to see a cab parked nearby.The cabbie peaked out of the side window.

“Which one of you is Chuuya Nakahara?!”he yelled “Me.”Chuuya said”Why?” “Your father told me to pick you up!We better get going or I’m not getting paid!”

Chuuya groaned in annoyance and moved Dazai’s hands off the sides of his neck,standing up.He turned to Dazai again and squeezed his hand.

“See ya in a few days,yeah?”

If there ever was a sight Dazai wanted ingrained in his brain it was the way Chuuya looked at that moment.Soft smile on his face,cheeks flushed,blue eyes seeming to sparkle and red hair backlit by the street light making a sort of halo.

So Dazai squeezed Chuuya’s hand back,hard,and took it all in like one might a painting,throat tightening.

“Yeah.”

And then Chuuya let go of his hand,turned heel and went into the cab.All too fast he drove off.

And for one of the first times in his life,Dazai sobbed.

“Why did you get me an early flight?” Chuuya asked his father

Mori looked exhausted,eyes bloodshot and lined with eye bags.He wasn’t the only one,with Koyo and Rūynosuke ,who Chuuya encountered on the way to his father’s office, looking much the same.

“Dazai’s been gone for three days…And now he’s dead.”

Chuuya chuckled.

“So he fucked off for three days,that’s not-“

Mori loudly opened his desk drawer and slammed a bloodied bandage onto the table.

Chuuya’s blood froze.

But he just…They just…Dazai couldn’t be…

“That could be anyone’s.” “It’s his blood,we checked.I’m sorry,Chuuya.” “No,no,no…That can’t be…I just…No..”Chuuya rambled,fingers wondering to his lips

Mori walked over to him and pulled him close,stroking Chuuya’s hair.

“I’ so sorry,son.I’m so sorry-“ “Where did you find it?” “What?” “Where did you find the bandage?”

Mori let go of him and looked at Chuuya with worry and confusion.

“Why do you ask?” “Fuck why I ask,where did you find it?!”

Mori seemed surprised for a moment,but quickly composed himself.

“Before Dazai disappeared I sent him to infiltrate the Takeichi gang.We found the bandage near their base.” “That’s in Kyoto,right?”

Mori nodded.And just like that,Chuuya got out of the embrace and started to walk towards the exit. “Where are you going!?” “To kill the Takeichi gang.” “Chuuya,you just got back,don’t be ridiculous.It’s a five hour drive.”

Chuuya kept walking regardless.

”Chuuya,as your boss I forbid you-“

A scalpel flew at the side of Mori’s head,a few stands of hair falling to the floor.Chuuya narrowed his eyes at his father and walked out.

~ Next morning,he was late to Dazai’s funeral.He didn’t want to be.He set an alarm,but apparently someone turned it off.

Despite that,Chuuya picked up his eulogy draft as he sat next to Koyo,who was telling him he should have washed off the blood.Chuuya didn’t consider that point worth responding to.

It wasn’t a pretty sight,he was sure.His hair was sticky and his face felt itchy,his suit scratching uncomfortably against blood soaked skin,but it didn’t matter.

He took down Dazai’s murderers and he was gonna wear that blood like a badge of fucking honour.

“And now,my son is gonna say a few words.”Mori said,with the same tone you’d give a business offer

Chuuya didn’t make eye contact with Mori as he walked up to the podium.He still hadn’t forgiven Mori for not killing those bastards or for inviting Ango here,despite his treason towards the Port Mafia.

He turned towards the people gathered,all of them regarding him with some mix of fear,concern and pity.

“We all know why we’re here…Osamu Dazai has died.He was…a lot of things.A brilliant tactician,the Black wraith of the Port Mafia…To me he was my partner.My best friend.”

He longed to add “my other half”as well,but figured even a eulogy should have limits in regards to how personal once could,should go.

“He was a good partner.Had my back whenever I needed it.During and outside of missions.Sometimes…He knew me better than I even knew myself.Usually it was rather annoying.Freaky.But,other times…It was better not to explain anything and still be understood.Perhaps,I didn’t understand Dazai…I don’t think anyone could…But I like to think I came close.”

He swallowed.

“Fact is…Osamu didn’t die the way he would’ve liked.Nothing any of us do will ever change that.He was killed.He died alone and in pain.We,as an organization failed him,my father failed him…I failed him.I wasn’t there when it would’ve counted.When it would’ve mattered…And there’s nothing I could ever do to make up for it.”

He cleared his all too tight throat.

“So take this as lesson.If we don’t learn from this,his death will mean nothing.And I refuse to live in a world where my best friend’s death meant nothing.”

He gave a conclusive nod,getting off the stand and sitting back on his chair.He closed his eyes and extended his hand for Koyo to take.He sat there for a bit,breathing deep and long.People began to mingle and Chuuya slowly stood,almost dragging himself to the window.

He looked up at the sky,trying to push away the memories of last night,blinking his tears away.Chuuya began to look down,when he saw it.

A pair of warm,scheming,narrow eyes locking with his from the fast food restaurant across the funerary home. Those were Dazai’s eyes.He knew them well enough to know that without a single doubt.He slammed the door open storming out.

Chuuya had killed people before,both of them had.Granted,Dazai had killed way more than Chuyya had,though the exact number was currently eluding him.

He didn’t make his partner into a murderer.Mori did.

He didn’t make Chuuya into a killer.

He didn’t. He didn’t! He didn’t!

And yet there the guilt was ,not letting him go.There Chuuya’s face was,marred by blood,coppery hair polluted by it too,face ashen and blue eyes almost gray.

Chuuya’s kills weren’t nearly as messy as Dazai’s.Chuuya didn’t need to get up close and personal and often didn’t want to.

Their first kill,Arthur Rimbaud,left Chuuya vomiting and sobbing trough the night.He didn’t do that for any other murder and he handled gore well enough,but he never took joy in killing.

That was Dazai’s job.

“Until now.Until you.”his mind bagged “Until you lied.Until you broke him.Until you made him into this.Into a monster.Until you made him into someone like you.”

“Dazai?You done in there?”Ango asked,knocking on the bathroom door.

Dazai sighed,looking down at the bolo tie Ango gave him after he ran interference on Chuuya once Dazai was spotted.

Opal,Oda’s birthstone,and the same shade of blue as Chuuya’s eyes.

He took a deep breath and secured it around his neck,caressing it with his his thumb for a moment.He ran his hand trough his hair,put on a smile and turned heel,opening the door.

“All done.”

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

#bsd #bsd chuuya #bsd dazai #skk #boss chuuya au #please comment #I need to know if I’m good at angst or if it’s just my bf gasing me up

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