edging-college-instructor-domina

[damnprecious]

I love how some of my most used recipes are super vague and then every time I try to bake them I despair over simple things such as 'why hasn't anyone written down a baking time'

[chaoticconstellation]

Actual Crumbl Sugar Cookie Recipe from a former employee who is no longer bound by their NDA:

makes approximately 55 cookies (or 200 minis!):

ingredients:

For Cookie:

2 pounds SALTED butter

1.9 pounds white sugar

1.2 pounds powdered sugar

8 eggs

4 cups of canola oil

4 tsps of ALMOND EMULSION. can substitute for extract, but use half the amount. can also swap for other flavored extracts like vanilla!

6 pounds of flour

*half ingredient packet* Crumbl uses ingredient packets to make sure that only corporate knows the recipes, but based on what’s missing from a standard cookie recipe and what happens if you forget a packet these are the approximate substitutions

5 tablespoons baking soda

5 tablespoons baking powder

For the Frosting:

1/2 a pound of SALTED butter

6 cups of heavy whipping cream (40% milk fat)

7.5 pounds powdered sugar

2 teaspoons ALMOND EMULSION *same as before can be substituted with half amount of almond extract or vanilla if you choose*

any food coloring of your choice but Crumbl uses RED. you only need *drops*

baking directions:

preheat oven to 290 degrees F or 143 C

soften your butters in your microwave, this step is crucial. you want them NOT at all melted, but soft enough to mold with your hands easily

put your butters and sugars into a large bowl, it’s easiest if this is a stand mixer, but if not an electric hand mixer is fine. you *may* attempt this by hand but i would recommend you don’t.

if you have levels choose your most medium level and beat your butter and sugar for 10 minutes. seriously. and it’s probably not done. scrape the sides, if there is any resistance it’s not done. the texture you’re going for is like passing your spatula through a cloud. you should feel no resistance, the mixture will be light, fluffy and if you feel it between your fingers it will be silky with *slight* sugary texture. imagine applying it to your face, it’s a daily cleanser not a weekly exfoliant.

when you think you’re done put it on for another 2 minutes to be safe.

turn down to level one and add your eggs, oil and flavoring. mix until it creates a creamy soup mixture.

add all of your flour and baking soda and powder.

mix until a homogeneous dough forms.

Sugar cookies at Crumbl are weighed at 4 ounces and scooped using a portion scoop to get their standard shape, then flattened to about 3/4 of an inch thick.

or if you don’t have access to a scale this recipe makes approximately 55 cookies so do your best with that.

*if you want to make minis like Crumbl does for catering the weight is 1 ounce & the baking time is 8 minutes!*

place on a parchment lined baking sheet 2 inches apart from both the other cookies and the sides of the baking sheet. This will be about 9 cookies.

bake for 14 minutes flipping half way.

if you are planning to frost these cookies here are the mandatory next steps to ensure you don’t end up with soggy cookies.

let cookies cool on either baking sheet or on a cooling rack for 20 minutes.

put as many as you can in a single flat line onto a baking tray or something that will fit in your fridge and put in the fridge for another 20 minutes.

now they will be ready to frost with the frosting in the next steps of this recipe.

frosting directions:

soften butter like above

add butter, 2 cups of heavy cream, 2.5 pounds of powdered sugar, food dye, and flavoring to your mixer.

mix on low for one minute or until mostly combined

mix on medium until smooth

mix on high for 3 minutes

turn back to low and add the rest of the cream and powdered sugar.

mix on low until mostly combined

mix on medium until smooth

mix on high for 3 more minutes.

viola! you have Crumbl Sugar Frosting.

now to frost your cookies like they do at Crumbl….

fucking good luck! — I mean…

If enough people request it I’ll do a little video.

you want a smooth flat top with a little flat swirl.



[anonymousewrites]

A Not-So-Disastrous Romance (Book 1) Chapter Twenty

Kusuo Saiki x Reader

Chapter Twenty: Crepes and Breaks

Summary: Saiki gets to make sweets, and his luck turns as his receiver breaks.

            “Are you ready to make crepes, Kusuo?” asked (Y/N), tying their cherry and strawberry themes bandana and apron on.

            “In today’s training, we will be making crepes,” said Coach Niwayama. “I don’t know how to cook, but I have the recipe!”

            “I like his apron,” said (Y/N), chuckling at the teddy bears on his.

            “Better than Kaidou’s,” said Saiki, looking dubiously at the skulls across Kaidou’s grey apron.

            “So, what are we looking to put together today?” said (Y/N).

            “Crepes are good on their own, but they go well with whipped cream, chocolate, and fruit. Can we add those to it?” said Saiki, much more energetic than he ever was in school (which meant that he was willing to be involved in activities. His face didn’t show anything).

            “Alright!” Nawayama passed out the recipe cards. “Let’s get cooking!”

            Saiki looked at Kaidou and Hairo arguing across from him. He was grateful to have (Y/N) in his group because they understood sweets better than anyone else he knew, so hopefully that would balance out whatever Kaidou and Hairo inevitably messed up.

            “Let’s do our best together,” said Hairo excitedly.

            “Right,” said Kaidou.

            “First we need to break two eggs,” said (Y/N). “Make sure to keep the shell from falling in.”

            “Got it,” said Saiki, lifting up two eggs.

            “Wait, Saiki, let me crack them!” said Kaidou. He took the eggs eagerly. “I can crack them with one hand.”

            “Kaidou, don’t—”

            Egg shell fell into the bowl, and (Y/N) slapped a hand over their face.

            “Shoot! The shell fell in!” cried Kaidou.

            “You should have used two hands!” said Hairo, pulling another egg apart. Yolk and shell fell out.

            (Y/N) sighed. Apparently, Hairo and Kaidou weren’t good at cooking. Saiki almost glowered at them as they began to ruin his chance to eat crepes (especially since Kuboyasu and Nendou were doing so well).

            While Kaidou and Hairo began to look in confusion at the next instruction (and poor Saiki watched), (Y/N) picked out a bowl and cracked two eggs perfectly.

            “Next, pour in some flower. How much is ‘some?’ ” asked Kaidou.

            “I don’t know,” said Hairo.

            “For now, let’s add three pinches,” said Kaidou.

            “Flour’s not seasoning,” said Saiki, trying to stop them.

            (Y/N) shook their head in amusement and poured flour into their own bowl.

            “Let’s see…What’s next,” said Kaidou.

            “Kaidou is being too cautious,” said Saiki, pouring more flour into their bowl.

            “Add some sugar,” murmured Hairo. “What’s ‘some?’ ”

            “These aren’t very clear instructions,” said (Y/N). “Desserts need exact measurements.” They measured the amount they needed and poured it into their bowl.

            “What are you doing?” said Saiki, glancing at them.

            “Don’t you worry, Kusuo. Just keep an eye on them so they don’t poison themselves,” chirped (Y/N).

            Indeed, there was a worry of that as Hairo and Kaidou poured an extravagant amount of sugar into the bowl. Who knew what else they’d add too much or too little of next.

            “This is bad,” said Saiki, trying to fish out some of the sugar. Unfortunately a whole stick of butter was thrown in, next, ruining his attempt to fix things.

            “Since it says ‘some,’ that should be enough, right?” said Kaidou.

            Oh, dear, this really could’ve been avoided with measurements, thought (Y/N), cutting and setting the butter to melt.

            “Oh, no, we didn’t melt it!” said Hairo.

            “Can we just microwave it?” said Kaidou, already setting the metal bowl into the microwave.

            “Good idea!” said Hairo.

            “I’m not going to bother to try to stop this.”

            There was a flash, and the microwave sparked itself to death. As Nawayama began to yell at Kaidou and Hairo, Saiki tried to remake the crepes they were currently failing at ((Y/N) continued with their work so that they’d have something to fall back on).

            “I didn’t know that we couldn’t put metal in the microwave,” said Kaidou as he slouched back to the table.

            “What should we do?” said Hairo, looking at their disgusting bowl of…something.

            (Y/N) looked in. “Maybe exorcise it?”

            “It looks like a breakfast from Hell,” agreed Saiki.

            “I hate to waste it, but we should probably throw it away,” said Hairo.

            “I guess we have to,” said Kaidou, sadly gazing at his monstrous creation.

            “Give it to me.” Mera held out a hand towards the food (if it could still be called that). “If you’re going to throw it away, give it to me.”

            “Mera, if you get possessed, it’s on you,” said (Y/N), looking concernedly at the contents of the bowl.

            “Okay!” Mera was fine with that if she could get food, and she grabbed the bowl and ran away.

            “Okay, let’s pull ourselves together and start over,” said Hairo.

            “It will go perfectly this time!” said Kaidou.

            Just as long as they don’t try to grab my bowl, thought (Y/N), happily mixing. They were fine with getting involved with their friends’ mishaps in any other situation, but cooking was the one thing (Y/N) really loved, so if someone messed up their work, they would be very disappointed.

            “Here.” Saiki had already remixed the ingredients, knowing Hairo and Kaidou were so behind in their group.

            “Wow!” said Hairo.

            “Did you make this, Saiki? Not bad,” said Kaidou.

            “ ‘Not bad?’ ” Saiki had done way more than “not bad.”

            “Not bad at all,” agreed Nendou, looking over.

            “Of course it is, we’re the ones who made it,” said Kaidou.

            “It was me who made it,” corrected Saiki.

            “We put our blood, sweat, and tears into it!” cried Hairo.

            “That wouldn’t taste good,” chirped (Y/N).

            “You haven’t even gotten to the hard part yet,” said Nendou.

            “What? One of the microwaves has already been destroyed,” said Kaidou incredulously.

            “If it becomes harder, the whole classroom will explode,” said Hairo.

            “Watch and learn,” said Nendou. He held up a pan. “First, lightly coat the pan with oil.”

            “When do you pour the batter in?” asked Kaidou.

            “Pour it in the center, like this,” said Nendou, showing them.

            “Won’t it be too thick?” asked Kaidou.

            “That’s why you spread it evenly,” said Nendou, demonstrating.

            “Wow, Nendou really does know how to make crepes,” said (Y/N), a bit surprised but pleased. Their own crepes were going well, too.

            “The one time I avoided having him in my group was the time I needed him,” said Saiki.

            (Y/N) laughed, and Saiki’s annoyance subsided a bit as their joy. That made the situation better, even if it was still exhausting to see Kaidou and Hairo so obviously clueless as they kept asking Nendou for clarification.

            “Amazing!” cried Kaidou as Nendou flipped the crepes effortlessly.

            “Well, good luck, guys!” said Nendou, returning to his group.

            “Shut up, we don’t need your help,” lied Kaidou even after he asked so many questions.

            “The flipping part seems hard,” observed Hairo.

            “Use a spatula to flip them,” said (Y/N). They smiled. “Flipping in the air is more advanced.”

            “Let’s be safe and do that,” said Hairo.

            “If we do that, Nendou wins,” said Kaidou. He spread the batter, waited a moment, and threw it in the air.

            “No, Kaidou!” cried Hairo dramatically.

            It flopped onto Nawayama’s head, and Kaido fell to his knees as the teacher began chewing him out. Kaidou slouched back with his head hung low while Hairo organized another crepe.

            “I’ll try it with the chopsticks,” said Hairo.

            “That will go better,” said (Y/N), fiddling in the stores of the room to try to find some fruit.

            Hairo and Kaidou looked at the browning crepe.

            “Isn’t that enough?” asked Kaidou.

            “No,” said Hairo.

            “Are you sure?” said Kaidou as it turned dark brown.

            “Not yet,” said Hairo.

            “It’s burning.” Saiki had lost another chance at crepes.

            “It needs to get hotter!” cried Hairo.

            Finally, he flipped it. Again, it looked like a monster with a skull face burned in. Hairo hung his head, and while he looked down sadly, Mera sidled up and stole the pan. (Y/N) let her go since she had handled the last batch well enough.

            “We have no choice but to leave it to Saiki and (L/N),” said Kaidou.

            “No, Mera!” cried Hairo, running towards their remaining batter as Mera downed it in a moment.

            Saiki went blank with Kaidou. Their batter was all gone because they’d been too lenient with letting Mera enjoy what they made before they had a chance.

            “You’re out of batter?” said Nendou, turning around. “Well, I guess I can share some of my crepes.”

            Saiki turned around with a true smile. “Nendou, I knew you could do it when all else fails.”

            “Did you?” laughed (Y/N) as they finished cutting strawberries.

            “Take a look at the Nendous’ special tuna salad crepes!” said Nendou.

            Saiki, Kaidou, and Hairo made disgusted faces. That…did not sound like a good combination with the sweetness of crepes.

            “No need, Nendou,” said (Y/N), smiling. “You can enjoy yours.” They held out the plate they had finished putting together. “We’ve got our own.”

            Hairo, Kaidou, and even Saiki’s eyes sparkled as they gazed at the crepes with chocolate and strawberries.

            “You made these for us?” said Kaidou, eyes wide.

            “Even as we messed up…” Tears came to Hairo’s eyes.

            (Y/N) smiled and waved a hand. “Of course. You guys worked hard. Enjoy.”

            Kaidou and Hairo excitedly took a crepe each and began to eat. Saiki stepped up and took his own.

            “You saved the day,” said Saiki.

            (Y/N)’s cheeks warmed. “I like crepes, too, so it was a little self-serving.”

            “Maybe, but you’re always too selfless anyways,” said Saiki.

            “You think so?” said (Y/N).

            “You watch out for everyone else,” said Saiki. They looked out for him most of all, always ready to help. “You should take care of yourself.”

            “I’ll try,” said (Y/N). They gazed at him warmly. “But who else is going to look after the people I care about if not me?”

            Saiki’s heart stuttered. He was someone they cared about. He found himself smiling as he took a bite of his crepe.

            “Still. Let us look out for you.”

            “Don’t worry, Kusuo. I know you have my back.” (Y/N) spoke with complete confidence even though Saiki regularly disliked having to help his friends (acquaintances and nuisances, he would argue).

            But they were right. Saiki would always look out for (Y/N). Always.

l

            Saiki looked at his hand, pleased with himself for having gotten so far with controlling his abilities. Now he had more control and returning a baseball to someone wouldn’t present a problem (and he wouldn’t accidentally take anyone’s head off). Still, he couldn’t remove either of his receivers, otherwise he would lose control again. The dampeners made sure his powers were manageable.

            Wham!

            A baseball slammed into the side of his head.

            Seriously. Again?

            He picked it up and threw it down. Instead, the baseball went flying into the stratosphere. Saiki stared at his hand in alarm.

            What just happened? I used the same amount of strength as before!

            He reached up and felt one of his receivers. The ball on top was gone. He looked down and saw it at his feet.

            I need to repair this.

            He took a step forward, but the force of it sent him flying forward, and he accidentally kicked the pink ball. It disappeared into the horizon.

            This is bad. This is really bad.

            Anything he did would result in destruction and danger. He was stuck.

            It’s too dangerous for me to return home like this. Saiki took of the remaining bit of the receiver. I will use my ability to reset objects to repair it. He focused and let the ability work. Turn back time! This should solve the issue.

            …

            It didn’t. Saiki stared at the pieces of the receiver, restored to when they hadn’t been put together as a machine. He had reverted time too much because of his abilities being out of control.

            I can’t use this! I will have to use my telepathy to tell my parents to pick me up.

            Unfortunately for Saiki, his telepathic ability was also off the charts. He couldn’t distinguish anyone’s voice from the other. Foreign languages had joined the mess of thoughts in Saiki’s head.

            He groaned, holding his head, and leaned against a wall. It crumbled, and he fell through. Lying on the ground, he stared up at the sky. He needed to get somewhere safe. But where? He didn’t know if his parents were home, and he had nowhere else to go.

            Saiki sighed. If only (Y/N) was here, they’d have a solution—

            His teleportation reacted instantly to the thought, and he disappeared from the lawn.

            Saiki groaned as he collapsed in a new room. Looking around, he found himself in a kitchen he’d been in a few times but remembered by heart.

            “Kusuo?!” cried a worried voice, and (Y/N)’s face came into his sight as they crouched beside him.

            His teleportation had brought him right to them. Oh, dear, even his abilities were influenced by his crush on them.

            “What happened to you?” asked (Y/N), looking at him with pure concern.

            If Saiki wasn’t in distress, he’d be flattered and a bit flustered by the way they were gazing at him, but as it was, he really needed help.

            “My receiver broke,” said Saiki.

            “Your—oh, your bobble?” said (Y/N), noticing the pieces in his hand.

            “Yes. I can’t control my powers.”

            (Y/N)’s forehead creased in worry. “How can I help?”

            “I need my parents,” said Saiki.

            “Alright. Don’t worry, Kusuo. I’ll get them,” said (Y/N), smiling at them.

            Saiki had no doubt; (Y/N) was the kindest and most loyal person he knew.

            He watched from the ground as (Y/N) headed to the phone and checked the phonebook for his house number.

            “Hello?” said (Y/N). “Mrs. Saiki? Hi, yes, it’s (Y/N). Kusuo’s here. His, uh, receiver, I think, the thing on his head, it broke.”

            Saiki faintly heard his mom yelling in panic.

            “He’s alright.” (Y/N) glanced at Saiki. “He’s just lying on my floor. Yeah, my address is…”

            Saiki closed his eyes as (Y/N) told his parents. They were coming. They’d have a solution to this.

            I just hope it doesn’t involve him.

l

            After school the next day, (Y/N) sighed and set their bag down on a chair before going to get a snack. They didn’t bother saying they were home—their parents were still out on another business trip—so they quietly went about their business. They wished Saiki was feeling better so they could’ve grabbed a snack with him, but he had been out sick from school that day, so his receiver obviously wasn’t fixed yet.

            Maybe I should go over to his house and check on him, thought (Y/N).

            Ring!

            The phone rang, and (Y/N) walked over to answer it. They furrowed their brow as they saw a foreign number. That was unusual. Still, (Y/N) didn’t hesitate to answer it (look, it’s the Saiki K universe. What harm could come to them?)

            “Hello?” said (Y/N).

            “Hello, is this (Y/N) (L/N)?” said an unfamiliar voice.

            “Uh-huh, who is this?” said (Y/N).

            “This is Kusuke Saiki,” said the voice. “I’m Saiki’s brother.”

            “…Kusuo has a brother?” (Y/N) blinked. They had no idea he had a brother; he’d never mentioned it. Not that he would. This is Kusuo.

            Little did they know, Kusuke was carefully storing the fact that they used Saiki’s first name away.

            “Yes, he does. Of course he doesn’t talk about me. I’m nothing special. But if you don’t believe me, you can look me up,” said Kusuke.

            “No, I believe you.” Really, (Y/N) did. “Is Kusuo alright? Is his receiver fixed?”

            Kusuke stored their knowledge of his powers away. “Almost! He’s coming to London to visit me. I was thinking of surprising him with some of his friends. Would you be to coming?”

            “Coming to London?” said (Y/N) incredulously.

            “It’s the weekend,” said Kusuke.

            “…I don’t know you,” pointed out (Y/N).

            “Nendou and Kaidou agreed to go,” said Kusuke.

            Well, someone should look out for them. “…Alright.” Hey, as long as this wasn’t a giant scam, (Y/N) would get to check on Saiki and make sure he was doing well.

            “Perfect,” said Kusuke. All the pieces of his plan had fallen into place

Taglist:

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@characterreaderwriter

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@newtscreatures347269

[basuralindo]

Hey I'm dropping a crepe recipe because there's still people around who think they're hard to make and I'm sick of french food being romanticized to the point of inaccessibility.

I call this a 3-2-1 method to make it easy to remember; 3 eggs, 2 cups water/fluid of choice, 1 cup flour.

I'm sparing you the obligatory backstory on my path to cooking extremely flat pancakes because we both know that neither of us care. If you want to hear me overshare check my blog between 1-4am pacific time.

•Anyway, start with three eggs and beat with a fork until they're all one color (you can use a whisk or an egg beater but I hate the extra steps. Fork it):

•Add 1 cup flour:

•Add whatever dry flavoring you want (I usually go with cinnamon and cardamom, today we're doing matcha cause that happens to be what I'm cooking. Some mornings caffeine is meant to be eaten):

•Add sugar to taste if desired. It's not necessary for the recipe, and if you've managed to add enough to throw off the consistency you've got other shit to worry about, so follow your heart. I usually use like two tablespoons or so (I prefer brown, but white tastes better with matcha):

•Decide on your fluid of choice. Water and/or milk is the usual, but you can do literally whatever you want; hot cocoa, coffee, tea, soda -whatever you want them to taste like. Go nuts with it. Use soup if you want idgaf it's between you and your chosen god at this point. I recommend starting with 2 cups for simplicity, but you can add more if needed for the right consistency. At this point I just eyeball it tbh.

•Add a little at a time and start mixing until it's as smooth as you can get (this is also where you'd add wet flavorings, like vanilla extract):

•Add the rest until the batter is roughly the consistency of heavy whipping cream, or like thin tomato soup (if you actually ran with the soup joke, add a little water to thin it out). Just get it to where it's still a little viscous but will run if you pour it on the pan:

•For best results cover and let it sit in the fridge overnight or for a few hours (it will separate a little, just mix it again). For last minute "I forgot to prep this last night but I really want crepes" results, we're putting it aside while I wash dishes and heat up the pan.

•Ladle out like ¼ cups worth onto a hot lubricated pan (butter or cooking oil, medium heat) and swirl it until it coats the bottom. Don't stress if it looks like shit the first few times, that's what practice is for, add a little more fluid if it's not spreading well:

•cook until the top is no longer wet and edges start to lighten:

•Flip it with either a very flat spatula or sheer hubris (spatula recommended for beginners), and cook for like 45 seconds (I have no sense of time), then slide it onto a plate:

•Top with whatever you want and try whatever folds/rolls you saw in that one show that made you think these were cool.

Go forth, have fun, eat well.

(if you want an even easier method with only mild sacrifice to quality: mix a couple eggs and some extra fluid into your leftover pancake batter and leave it in the fridge for the next morning)

[mortiskiller]

How I Manage Food Costs as a Feedist

Preface: I often see people in this community post about struggling with food insecurity and managing food costs. These are just some tips that have helped me when I was down to the last few dollars and needed to eat for a few weeks. I understand circumstances are different for everyone, and some people struggle even with this level of food security, I have been there. My intention is to help.

With food prices still high—often due to profit gouging—I’ve found ways to manage my food budget, and the secret is simple: **eat at home!** Growing up in extreme poverty with two working parents, eating at home was pretty much our only option, aside from takeout once every few months. My parents taught me the value of home cooking, and while it takes time to develop essential skills, Making sauces, learning how to prep and clean ingredients, cooking veggies, preparing meats, etc., once you have them, there’s a whole world of recipes within reach.

Here’s how I manage food costs, and how you can too:

1. Weekly/Monthly Shopping Essentials

Start with the basics—items you’ll need to shop for regularly to cover your meals for a week or two. Building a pantry depends on the storage space you have, but here are some key ingredients to keep on hand:

- Milk (1 to 2 gallons, depending on your choice—I go with 1%)

- Eggs (18 count)

- Bread (1 loaf) (I also recommend tortillas as they last longer than bread and can be used for nearly any bread needs)

- Rolls or Croissants (If you shop at a bulk store, you can get a dozen for $6.)

- Fruits: Change with the season, but apples, oranges, and grapes are solid year-round choices. In the summer, throw in some berries and stone fruit.

- Veggies for Prep: Stick to simple, versatile veggies like green bell peppers, zucchini, onions, potatoes, and chilies.

- Butter: Unsalted sweet cream butter is my favorite! Go for sticks instead of tubs for a better per-unit cost.

- Leafy Greens: A bag of spinach or romaine hearts

- Cheese: Shredded cheese works best and if you want to save more, buy a block and slice or shred it yourself.

These staples give you a variety of flavors, textures, and nutrition to build meals around, whether you’re whipping up sides, salads, or more complex dishes.

2. Protein, Protein, Protein!

Protein is an essential part of a healthy diet, but you don’t need to overdo it or overspend. I’ve found that chicken and tofu are some of the most affordable and versatile protein sources available (unless you’re hunting your own!). Both freeze well and can be used in a variety of recipes with different seasonings and marinades.

You can also look at beef, but stick to lean beef and fish as you do not want to pay for fat that will not end up in your food.

3. Shelf-Stable Items to Buy in Bulk

Buying in bulk can be a game changer, especially if you stock up on shelf-stable items. If you’re short on storage space, invest in an airtight tote to keep things organized. Start with common essentials like:

- Flour (Good ole AP with cover you most of the time)

- Sugar

- Baking Powder

- Baking Soda

- Brown Sugar

- Cooking Oil (I go for olive oil and canola oil)

These staples are the foundation of countless recipes and, when stored properly, can last for months or even a year.

4. Season Early, Season Often

Spices are what make food magical! You don’t need fancy brands—stick with basics that offer single-ingredient profiles. My go-to spices are:

- Salt

- Pepper

- Garlic Powder

- Onion Powder

- Thyme

- Oregano

- Paprika

- Cumin

- Cinnamon

- Chili Powder

- Vanilla Extract

- Bouillon Cubes

- Red Pepper Flakes

These spices will give you all the flavor you need to create a variety of meals without breaking the bank.

5. Canned Goods: The Unsung Hero

Canned goods are a staple in my kitchen. They offer consistent quality, low prices, and a long shelf life. Plus, they’re great for backup when fresh ingredients are low. Some key canned items to keep on hand are:

- Pinto Beans

- Crushed Tomatoes

- Tomato Paste

- Tomato Sauce

- Boiled White Potatoes

- Herring or Sardines

- Tuna

- Fruit Cocktail

- Peaches

- Pears

- Broth or Stock

These ingredients can help you create filling and versatile meals on a budget.

6. Where You Shop Matters

The store you shop at can make a huge difference in food prices. Here’s how to stretch your budget even further:

Bulk Stores: Invest in a membership at places like Sam’s Club, Costco, or BJ’s. The $100 yearly fee is usually paid for in savings after just a few trips. Protein, especially beef and fish, is almost always cheaper in bulk stores.

Walmart and Aldi: These stores are great for extras like frozen veggies, fresh produce, dairy items, and baked goods. Their prices are hard to beat!

Hope this helps and feel free to reblog or comment with your own tips and tricks!

Stick to Your List: One of the easiest ways to overspend and waste food is by shopping without a plan. Make a list, and stick to it. This will help keep your budget in check and prevent unnecessary purchases.

By following these steps, you can keep your food costs down while still eating healthy and delicious meals. The key is planning ahead, shopping smart, and keeping a well-stocked pantry!

[tastesoftamriel]

You know those cheesy pasta dishes with all the fancy add-ins like heavy cream and garlic so we can all pretend to ourselves that we aren't just eating mac and cheese like overgrown children? What sort of equivalent dishes do the people of Tamriel enjoy, that are basically just dressed-up "kid food" dishes?

Who doesn't love a cheeky meal that brings back memories of childhood? Across Tamriel, you'll find all manner of simple, hearty foods that will make you feel like a kid again!

Altmer

In Summerset, young and old alike enjoy mochi, a tasty sweet snack made from chewy glutinous rice flour. Mochi comes in many varieties, with fillings like sweet peanut or black sesame paste. However, almost everyone's favourite is a cold mochi filled with soft gelato of various flavours. My favourite combination is matcha mochi wrapped around a moreish azuki bean ice cream centre.

Argonians

Is there anything that makes you feel more like a kid than some snacking? Argonians are huge fans of anything that packs a crunch, both sweet and savoury. Whether it's spicy and sweet crickets, dark saltrice sauce-coated mealworms, or just good old prawn crackers with some dipping sambal, be prepared to snack your way all day long in Black Marsh.

Bosmer

If you're one of those people who stands in the kitchen gnawing a block of cheese at midnight, you're in good company in Valenwood. A popular late-night treat served at street food vendors across the Province is a simple cup of grilled witchetty grubs slathered in timber mammoth cheese sauce and topped with pulled pork. The grubs are meaty in flavour, and the pungent timber mammoth cheese complements the pulled pork when mixed all together, as the locals enjoy it.

Bretons

Pain au chocolat? Yes please! These deliciously buttery puffed pastries are essentially rectangular croissants enveloping delicious dark chocolate. Served warm, they're sure to make any breakfast or teatime a happy one! To really satisfy those chocolate cravings, pair with a classic Breton hot chocolate, complete with marshmallows and whipped cream.

Dunmer

Marshmerrow cake is the ubiquitous Dunmeri dessert that has gained popularity far beyond the borders of Morrowind due to its mild flavour and unique candy aroma. A soft sponge cake, which is sometimes soaked in comberry brandy, is layered with sweet marshmerrow crème patissiere, caramelised marshmerrow crumble, and maraschino comberries. Sure to knock some years off your age and put a couple more holes in your belt (it's impossible to stop at one slice. Source: me).

Imperials

There's nothing quite like homemade gnocchi with ragout for Imperials when it comes to comfort food. While this homey dish is prevalent across Cyrodiil, every household cooks the dish differently. In mine, my mother pan-fries the gnocchi in an obnoxious amount of butter, and tops it with her top-secret slow-cooked lamb and red wine ragout. While I cannot give away the secrets to her ragout, I highly recommend trying this delicious dish a try when you need to warm yourself, body and soul.

Khajiit

If you think you can turn away cinnamon and cardamom churros with a cup of moon sugar caramel dip, you're deluding yourself. This delicious treat can be found across Elsweyr and is considered one of the Province's most famous foods. Khajiiti churros, which are made from a mix of rice and tapioca flour, have a moist and chewy texture beneath a crisp, golden brown outer layer. They're served hot from the wok, with a cup of moon sugar caramel syrup. A truly divine pairing!

Nords

Spätzle is something I've written about in the past, and it's one of the best things I know (ask any resident of Skyrim and they'd tell you the same). These chunky egg noodles may look unrefined compared to Khajiiti vermicelli, but make up for it when liberally doused in a creamy cheese sauce and topped with fried onions. I like spicing mine up, quite literally, with some chili powder I purchased at a Sentinel bazaar.

Orcs

Nothing screams comfort food (and mess) quite like a good old echatere sausage hot dog. The echatere sausage, rather akin to Blackwood chorizo in flavour, is grilled over hot coals and served in a sourdough bun, served Wrothgar style with a good amount of horseradish mayo, fried radish chips, caramelised onions, pickles, and crispy dried baby shrimp topping. I'd say you can't stop at just one, but it's a hefty meal you can eat with one hand!

Redguards

I have probably written about gulab jamun in the past, a delicious, albeit cloying dessert popular throughout Hammerfell. An iconic dish at festivals and parties, gulab jamun is prized by dessert-lovers for its velvety, syrupy texture. These fluffy balls of cardamom-scented cottage cheese are fried and soaked in a fragrant saffron and rose water syrup, and topped with crushed pistachios. So simple, so good, and so moreish. Just be sure to stop at three, because any more and the sugar rush will send you to Aetherius!

[selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs]

I really like your works! What about self-aware Kyuusaku, or maybe Francis? You can do whichever you want!

Baking pancakes (Fitzgerald and Kyuusaku)

Self-Aware! Strictly Platonic! Kyuusaku Yumeno x GN! Reader

Self-Aware! Francis Scott Key Fitzgerald x GN! Reader

Description: You spend time with Q and Fitzgerald. You three are baking pancakes.

Warning: OOC. Q's gender isn't specified. Fluff. English is my second language

You looked around the kitchen.

You close your eyes and shake your head.

Then, you open your eyes and looked around again.

The kitchen table with eight bags of flour, seven sticks of butter, nine big containers of milk, five bottles of syrup, five bottles of whipped cream, a few dozen eggs, and four bags of brown sugar had not disappeared.

You gaze at Fitzgerald and Q. Tycoon and kid looked a little bit ashamed.

"Francis, Q, do you realize, what is the main reason for dairy to be put on sale?"

Francis cleared his throat and answered.

"Well, [Y/N], do you think I have visited supermarkets every day? Or at all?"

Kyuusaku hugged their doll closer and utter:

"And I was..."

You raised your hand.

"Okay, let me rephrase my question. Why no one of you checked the expiration date?"

Fitzgerald and Q try their best not to look at you.

You sigh. These two

Who knew, that Francis Scott Key Fitzgerald, Leader of The Guild and Kyuusaku Yumeno, also known as Q, would become shopping buddies?

Francis, despite getting his fortune back, still enjoyed sales in shops. And Q liked chaos during sales.

You can't blame Francis. There was something special in Sales, and weren't thinking only about lower prices. Sometimes, you could find something interesting in during Sales, be it a good bag, nice clothes, interesting book, tasty food or so many others important or good things.

Today, Francis and Q have stumbled on a sale in your local supermarket. They returned home with bags full of products from sale. They got home. You helped them unpack. Only for you three to saw, that almost all products (except brown sugar, eggs and flour) will soon expire. And, by soon, you mean tomorrow.

That's how you three got in that situation.

Well, no use to just stand there.

"We three are transforming breakfast into dinner"

__________

"Francis, please, break eggs in a separate bowl. Pancakes with eggshells taste terrible. But have a nice crunch."

"Did eggshell got into your pancake on incident or Tetchou tried to cook again?"

"First, Tetchou not that bad of a cook. Second, it was a bet."

"How it ended?"

"With a lecture from Akiko and half-eaten pancakes in the garbage bin."

____________

"Kyuusaku, please, don't add too much sugar."

"Can I make a few pancakes that sweeter than others?"

"Made them on bunny-shaped pan."

_____________

"Careful with flour, [Y/N]. You almost covered the whole table and my doll in it."

"Sorry... Achoo!"

"Bless you, [Y/N]"

"Thanks you two."

___________

"And Miss Louisa was wondering why we need four pancake pens. I was sure that they will be useful."

"Francis, in a house full of people there is no such thing as useless tableware, pan, clothes, shampoo and so on, and so forth.

__________

"Fitzgerald, are pancakes doing good?"

"Everything is great, [Y/N]. How's the last bowl of pancake butter?"

"Almost finished. Kyuusaku?"

"I am adding jam and whipped cream. No problems from my part."

_________

It took time. But, at the end, you three manage to bake enough pancakes to feed a small army.

You feel proud. You noticed, that two other 'cooks' also looked pleased.

Kyuusaku turned to you and Fitzgerald. They were wearing matching aprons with their doll.

"What we are going to cook next time? When we will cook together?"

You and Fitzgerald exchanged glances.

"Maybe, when we will be on a cooking duty next time. As for the food... I am not sure, my young friend. What do you think, [Y/N]?"

You shrug.

"Will see. Just, please, don't buy almost expired food on purpose. If you want to spend time together, just ask."

Fitzgerald's quiet laugh and Q's giggles were their only answer.

[sapphire-heart-tippy]

Sugar Crash Void Bash: The Fanfic!

The direct sequel to: The Sapphire Heartverse

Chapter One: Candy Coded

chapter 2 chapter 3 chapter 4 chapter 5 chapter 6 chapter 7 chapter 8

Last entirety edit: 9/04/2024

“Ramón!” The brunette man calls from the kitchen, “Your breakfast is going to get cold, Foofy!” Ice sighs and places a paper towel over the two freshly cooked, fluffy pancakes dolloped with butter, and a side of over easy eggs. 

“Need any help, Vans?” Tippy asks zeir husband. Vanilla pouts a little bit, 

“Go get your son.” He points.

In his room, 15 year old Ramón is on his computer chair listening to music and doodling a little in his sketchbook. Tippy opens the door,

“Mi hijo,” Ze knocks on the panel. Ramón turns around a little startled, then takes his headphones off,

“D-daddo! Good morning! I was just about to uh… yeah.”

“Get your cotton-candy-headed self in the kitchen before your pops sends you to the void.” Tippy teases Ramón. Ramón gets up from his computer chair and looks down at his dad with a chuckle. Tippy looks up at him,

“When did you get so tall?! I swear, we might have to get you a bigger doorway,” ze follows Ramón to the kitchen, “or a bigger house, heheh!”

“What’s this about a bigger house, sweetie? I’m not making any more renovations to this place until you give me a garden.” Vanilla points a spatula and gives his husband a warm chuckle and a smile.

“Papa, do you have to wear that apron every time you cook?” Ramón sits down at the table with an exaggerated eye roll as he takes the paper towel off of his plate.

“Yes, I do, young man. Eat your food so you can get taller and annoy your dad even more.” Vanilla dusts some pancake flour off of his purple apron with violet hearts on the pockets. He adjusts his hair bun and brushes his long left bang behind his ear. Ramón notices this and remembers something he’s been wanting to say for years. Vanilla pulls off his apron, getting ready to eat breakfast with his family. The teenage boy finishes chewing and swallows his pancake, then lightly points his fork at his papa,

“Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask you, pops. How come your right bang is so much shorter than the left? It’s been like that forever.”

Vanilla looks at his son, frozen. His mouth is open a little and his eyes are just a bit wide, Vanilla is stuck in place for a moment. The brunette looks to his lower left then his upper right,

“Uh… ah. Well…” Vanilla daintily folds his apron, fidgeting with it, “I… I’ll have to tell you when you’re older.” 

“Huh? How come?” Ramón asks before drinking some orange juice. Vanilla sits next to Tippy and kisses the top of zeir head.

“Well, Foofy… It’s a long story. A very long, boring story that you might not want to sit through.” Vanilla fidgets with his hair and doesn’t make eye contact with his son. Ramón has a feeling something is up, but leaves it alone.

After Tippy leaves for work at the art studio, Vanilla drops Ramón off at his high school.

“Alright, Foofs, have a wonderful day at school. Don’t cause trouble now!” Vanilla smiles at Ramón. He leans over and kisses his son on the cheek, much to Ramón’s dismay.

“Papa, don’t!” The pink haired boy turns around to look out the window in case anyone might’ve seen. He whips his head back around to his father, “I’m not a little kid anymore, you can’t just… kiss me like that, man.” Vanilla’s brows frown,

“I’m sorry…” Ramón opens the car door and Vanilla speaks, “You’ll always be my little boy. No matter how old you get.” 

Ramón sighs,

“I know, pops.”

“Ramoooooooon!” One of his friends playfully howls at him.

“Gotta go! See you at home!”

“Okay, Foofy, I lo-” Ramón closes the door on Vanilla. The brunette is stunned for a moment. He brushes his longer bang behind his ear and drives away with a very hurt expression.

“There he is!” One of Ramón’s friends, Jared, pats his back. Jared is a tall, lean yet muscular teenage boy with a box fade hair style, gold dangling earrings with stars at the end, and very dark brown eyes, “Are you still gonna hang out after cheer today?”

“Yeah, that’s the plan anyway, but it’s subject to change.” Ramón smiles and playfully shoves his friend. They both walk inside the building. Alex, another one of Ramón’s friends walks besides the two boys. She is a chubby teenage girl with straight blonde hair down her back, light blue eyes, and braces,

“Did you see the new episode of Space Train Violence last night?! It was the best one yet!”

“You say that about every episode! Even the one where they stood on the moon and didn’t do anything.” Jared tells her with a laugh. Ramón opens his locker and sets his backpack inside. Jared leans up against the locker next to Ramón about to say something. Suddenly his eyes widen and he smacks Ramón on the back a few times to get his attention.

“Dude, what?” Ramón turns around to see Cobie, his crush approaching the two of them. Cobie is a goth teenager with spiky black hair, blue lipstick, dark eye makeup surrounding their dark purple eyes. They walk towards Ramón, causing his heart to pound. Jared suppresses a laugh. He stretches and speaks,

“Oh yeah, I just remembered I have to be over here or whatever. Hi, Cobie.”

“Hey.” Cobie waves gloomily at Jared. “Hey, Ramón.”

“Hi. Uh, ahem, hi. Cobie.” Ramón clears his throat.

“I found these rat bones behind my house. I was lucky enough to find the skull too. I was thinking about adding it to my collection.” Cobie tells him, showing him the skeleton in a shoe box. Oh man, they are so cool.

“Y-yeah, that sounds awesome. Uh… so how is your half of the project coming along?” Ramón asks them.

“It’s going well. I hope you don’t mind that I put a spiderweb design on some parts.” Cobie closes the box.

“I think that’s really cool.” Ramón smiles at them. They look at him with a blank expression, but it’s still obvious that they enjoy his company. Cobie is about to speak, but suddenly, the box is smacked out of their hands. The box and its contents spill all over the floor. The person who did that also slams Ramón’s locker shut,

“Ew! There were bones in that thing!” 

“Ryan…” Ramón grits his teeth. Ryan is a tall, muscular yet chubby and pale, strawberry blonde teenage boy with blue eyes.

“Don’t you have anything better to do than be a douchebag?” Ramón sighs with a scowl.

“Wow, so hostile for no reason!” Ryan laughs. He tries to intimidate Cobie by pretending he’s going to attack them. When they flinch, Ryan laughs even harder. He turns back towards Ramón, “What? What?”

Ramón grits his teeth, and winds up his leg about to kick Ryan in the face. Unfortunately the headmaster walks down the hallway. Ryan gives her a fake smile and bows to her,

“Good morning, Miss Lewis. You look lovely today.”

“Good morning, Ryan.” She smiles at him, then sneers at Ramón, “Morning, Mr Ice.”

“Good morning, Miss Lewis.” Ramón says.

“Mhm. Have you been getting control of that menace of a stand?” She narrows her eyes at him. Ramón is about to speak to defend his stand, but suddenly she turns to see two other teenagers attacking one another, “HEY!” She sprints over to them at lightning speed, “No stand fighting in the hallway!” She grabs them both with her stand’s mechanical arms and pushes them away from each other,

“If I catch you using your stands to fight again, you are both getting detention!”

Ramón, Ryan, and Cobie watch this happen. Ryan turns back to Ramón and flips him off as he walks away. Ramón angrily bites his teeth and shakes his head. 

After school

Ramón and Jared head to the gym to cheer practice. The cheer captain Lillie, a teenage girl with long lavender box braids tied into a ponytail, bright pink lipstick, and dark brown almost pitch black eyes, blows a sparkly pink plastic whistle,

“Alright, everyone!” She claps her hands, “Let’s get this party started! Ramón! Have you been practicing those backflips?”

“You know it.” Ramón tells her. Jared elbows him in the shoulder,

“Hey, ask her about the thing- actually I’ll ask her about the thing- Lillie!”

“Yeeees?” She asks with a cheerful smile. Ramón tries to get Jared to stop talking, but he persists,

“Ramón’s stand can glitch people in and out of existence. Can he use it for our next performance?” Lillie taps her pen with a fluffy pink end against her cheek,

“Hmmm… I don’t know. Is it a destructive stand?”

“U-uh,” Ramón looks around at the other cheerleaders, “Well… I don’t actually know. I mean- uh… Sugar Crash-”

“Ooooh, Sugar Crash! I like that name! Sorry, go ahead.” Lillie giggles.

“Uh… well… like I said, I don’t know what else he does. The only thing I know how to do now is uh… well… uh, okay okay,” Ramón steps in front of everyone, “Let me show you.”

The teenage boy takes out his stand Sugar Crash. Sugar Crash is a pastel pink robotic looking stand. He has an angular helmet on his head, right-triangle eyes with blue scleras and black pupils, a soft angled cube torso, with teal, pink and green beams connecting his purple mechanical hands. The torso has a heart shaped hole in the middle with a swirling pink vortex with a light blue singularity. The torso is also connected to a spiked and more sharp angled cubic bottom. Sugar Crash levitates with small pink, teal, and green rings coming out of the bottom cube. 

Lillie smiles as Ramón continues to introduce them all to Sugar Crash. Ramón leaps into the air to perform a backflip, and Sugar Crash causes him to glitch out of existence. The other cheerleaders ooh and aah at what happened. Suddenly they hear his voice, which sounds just as glitched and distorted as he once was,

“I’m still here,” Ramón speaks and they all look around the gym for him, “But at the same time I’m not. It’s hard to explain… down here.” Ramón’s voice is normal now. His head and torso are coming out of the floor. The matter around him is glitched and looks distorted, Ramón is also just a little distorted, his image is jerking around as if he is a corrupted video game character. One of the teens covers their eyes because it’s difficult for them to look at. Lillie frowns her brows and smiles,

“That’s so cool! But I don’t know how we could incorporate that into our cheer. Especially if it could be harmful to other peoples’ eyes.”

“O-oh, no no!” Ramón floats up quickly and goes back to normal, “We wouldn’t have to do the floor thing, but phasing in and out of existence could be part of our routine.” A few of the other cheerleaders look at each other. One of them gets a worried look and speaks,

“I-I dunno… it seems, like, kind of dangerous…” Another one chimes in,

“Yeah, what if one of us gets stuck in the ground or a wall?”

“Yeah! And what if we get stuck in the void forever?!” Another speaks up. Ramón tries to settle them down. They all start talking about stand users with void powers and how they’re always dangerous,

“I had a cousin who had a void type stand. He went crazy and ended up sealing away half of his family into the ether! Never to be seen again!”

“That’s awful, I heard there are some people who can call the void at will and destroy everything in their path.” Another says.

“That’s horrible!”

“In my opinion, people with stands like that shouldn’t be allowed to-”

Lillie blows her whistle, getting a little upset,

“Alright!” She claps her hands, “Let’s get back to practicing our cheers for the game!” She gives Ramón an apologetic look. They all practice their original routine until it’s time to go home. 

That night

Ramón has his cheek pressed up against his palm, playing with his dinner with a fork. 

“Foofy?” Vanilla asks his son sweetly. Ramón looks up at his papa with a small,

“Mmm?”

“Is everything alright? Did something happen at school, Foofs?” Ice asks his child.

“Yeah, you okay, chiquito? You look kinda sad.” Tippy asks, joining in with a warm expression.

Ramón looks at his papa, then at his dad, then back at his papa. Ramón grimaces a little then leans back in his chair,

“Uh… it’s uh… you know, like…” He waves his hand around, “puberty.”

“Ah, that makes sense.” Tippy nods, while Vanilla has a feeling something else is going on. Ice tightens his lips into a line with worried brows and scratches his jaw a little bit,

“You know you can always come to us if there’s anything bothering you.”

“I know.” Ramón tells them, “Uh… I need to do my homework. Big test tomorrow, so I have to get on that.” He gets up and heads to his room.

“W-wait! Foofy, you didn’t finish-” Vanilla picks up the plate and tries to bring it to Ramón, but his son closes his bedroom door. His shoulders drop and he brings the plate back to the table. Ice sighs deeply and slumps down into a chair.

“Hey…” Tippy walks over and wraps zeir arms around zeir husband, “He’s just going through a phase where he wants to be independent. Let him have his space for now, okay?”

“I…I know, sweetie.” Ice touches Tippy’s hand which is resting on one of his shoulders, “He’s growing up too fast. I remember when he could fit in my arms. He was so tiny. I would look down at him while rocking him and he would look at me with those big brown eyes…” Vanilla smiles, fondly remembering his son as an infant, “I would smile at him and he would smile back… I used to fall asleep with him in my arms on the couch.”

“Yeah, and you spoiled him rotten to the point he couldn’t sleep without you!” Tippy playfully pokes zeir husband’s nose, “Ramón would cry all night until you would hold him. He sounded so pitiful, he just wanted his papa…”

“He needed me, Tippy.” Vanilla covers his mouth. Tippy touches Vanilla’s cheek,

“I know and now you need him.” Ze pats Ice’s cheek.

“Hm? What do you mean by that?” The brunette asks. Tippy chuckles,

“You don’t want your little boy to grow up just yet.”

“Well, what parent wants their baby to grow up?” Ice pouts, making his husband laugh,

“It’ll be okay. Maybe you and Ramón can hang out one day. Maybe take him bowling or something and have a Papa and Foofy day!”

“I would love that so much, but…” Ice’s eyes are downcast, “I don’t think he wants to be seen in public with me.” He adjusts his hair bun and tucks away the loose strands, “He pushed me away when I kissed his cheek…”

“Listen here, Lucky Charms,” Tippy wraps his arm around his husband’s shoulders, “I’m serious when I say just let him have his space. Go ahead and wait until Sunday, that way it’s after the game, then ask if he’d like to hang out with you.” Ze kisses Vanilla’s cheek, “You know! Just get to know your kiddo all over again.”

“Maybe you’re right, Termite.” Ice gives zem a small smile and kisses zeir forehead. 

Sunday

“Foofy?” Ice gently opens Ramón’s door. The teenage boy is sleeping soundly in the top bunk of his desk-bunkbed. Vanilla hears his son peacefully breathing in his slumber, this makes him smile. The brunette thinks back to when he would watch Ramón sleeping in his crib, so worried and so protective of his child. The man clears his throat and speaks a little louder,

“Foofs?”

“Snrrrkkk- huh? What?” Ramón stirs awake. The teenage boy leans up a little too fast and bonks his head on the ceiling, “Ouch!” He rubs his head. 

“Oh! Are you alright?” Ice leans forward.

“Y-yeah… uh, hey, good morning, papa. You need me for something?” 

“Hmhm, well… I was thinking,” Ice leans on the door pane with a warm smile, “You and I haven’t had any ‘papa and son’ time together in… hm… a long while. Perhaps you and I could…” Vanilla’s voice trails off as he notices his son’s wincing face. This hurts his feelings quite a bit, however he continues, “Could, er, go bowling. If you’d like. Just you and me?”

Ramón grimaces and looks at his papa for a few uncomfortable moments,

“Uhh.. oh, dang, uh… I don’t know, man. I’m a little sore from cheer yesterday.” Ramón stretches, rubs his neck, and nonchalantly looks away. 

“I see…” Vanilla’s eyes are downcast. “If you ever need anything, Foofy, please let me know.” Ice’s honey sunset eyes gaze up into Ramón’s.

“You got it, pops! I’ll be fine. Honest.” 

“Mnh.” Ice nods at his child with a small smile as he gently closes the bedroom door.

Ramón waits a few moments after his papa leaves before breathing a sigh of relief,

“Glad that’s over…” The pink haired boy rips off the blankets from himself and slides down the ladder and sits down at his desk. Ramón puts on his headset and starts up his computer. After a while, he hears his other friends and speaks,

“Heeeeyy! So, are we still on for the mall today?”

Unbeknownst to Ramón, his papa stayed right outside the door and could hear everything.

“What? No, no I’m free. Yeah, my fathers said it’s okay… cool, I’ll meet you both around 2.”

Vanilla twirls his left bang around in a vain attempt to comfort himself. Ice sighs softly and gives one last glance at Ramón’s bedroom door, before finally walking away.

To be continued…

[1800classiccherries]

Cake! ♡‧₊˚

⚘ Earth42!Miles Morales x black!fem!reader

⚘ Fluff! use of knives for baking, kissing

⚘ summary: Miles and reader bake a cake together.

⚘ wc: 763

⚘ this is my first time writing 42!miles so bare with me 😁☝🏾 (also sorry for the lack of picture, I'm on the fence about changing the way I format these.)

"How hard can it be?" you shrug feeling confident, as Miles reads the strawberry shortcake recipe you handed him.

“mm.. Ion know, this looks kinda difficult, ma…” he flips the paper and reads the rest of the instructions with a squint, “But, hey, if you got experience in this sorta thing…”

“I’m basically a pro, I’ve baked plenty of cakes.” As in plenty, you’ve bakes two and they both turned out less than great, but you chose to leave that part out.

“If you say so…”, he squints at you, “Are these all the ingredients we need?” he asks referring all the stuff on the counter you had set before he arrived.

“Mhm! That should be all of it…” you open a drawer that has a few aprons inside, “Want an apron?”

“you got one of them kiss the chef aprons?” you nod, “then I’ll take that one."

You hand him the apron and then grab one for yourself, yours just being a simple green with faint floral patterns. Once the two of you have tied them on Miles looks at you with an expecting look ok his face.

“What?” you ask already knowing what he wanted.

“Read the apron. I think the chef needs a kiss, don’t you?”

You tilt your head at him with an eyebrow raised, “I think the chef needs to focus on this cake we’re boutta attempt.”

“Aww, don’t be like that, y/n” He pleads, taking a hold of your waist.

With the way he was looking at you, you gave in giving him a short kiss knowing that if you kept going the cake would be forgotten. 

Turning your attention back to the cake it was time to begin, you pick up the paper with the instructions on it and begin reading aloud the first few steps. Whipping the eggs, sifting the flower then combining the two. Miles took care of the eggs and you happily sifted the flour having found it very satisfying.

“Y/n, could you pre-heat the oven? I’m almost done with this part,” Miles requests as he adds the milk and butter into the mixture. 

Once the oven was heated to the right temperature, you place the cake pan inside and set a timer for 30 minutes.

“What should we do for the next 30 minutes?” you ask staring the the cake in the oven.

~

Pulling away from Miles as you sit straddled on his lap, breathing slightly heavy, “Do you hear that?”

“Ion hear anything,” he brushes off pulling you back in by your hips.

You give up on trying to make out the sound and go to back making out with Miles, but you hear the sound again.

“Don’t tell me you can’t hear that?” the sound was driving you crazy and you had a nagging feeling that it was important but you  couldn’t place it.

“Y/n-“ he starts before you cut him off putting a finger to his lips.

“Shh, it sounds like it’s in the kitchen… Did we- Oh! The cake!” you promptly climb off of him and dash to the kitchen.

You grab the oven mitts on the counter and carefully take the cake out dumping it onto the drying rack.

“This actually looks good!” you cheer hopping a bit.

Miles finally makes it into the kitchen, “Of course it does, we made it.”

“I’ll cut this into three, and while it cools we can make the icing. Get the cream and sugar out.” Miles follows your instructions grabbing the necessary ingredients.

You pull a knife out of the drawer and cut the cake horizontally into three shorter cakes. Miles whips together the cream and sugar being sure to not make a mess. 

After the icing is made and the cake is cooled, it’s now time to assemble. You got the strawberries out of the fridge, washing and cutting them in half. Miles spreads and even layer of icing between each layer, pausing each time so you can add the strawberries.

Coating the cake with a layer of icing along the outside and adorning the cake with the last finishing touches, the two of you take a step back to admire your work.

“I won’t lie, it looks great.” Miles admits surprised at how well it turned out.

You grin hearing the compliment “See? And to think that you doubted us.”

“Not too much, for all we know it could be nasty.”

It was very much the opposite and y’all couldn’t help but eat most of it. Being sure to save a piece for your families to try.

Thanks for reading!

I didnt edit much and wrote pretty quick this so if sumn doesnt makes sense, oopsie 😋

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

i was just reading a fic where someone said they needed to set aside their pasta dough "to rise", and that made my eye twitch badly enough that i would like to give you all a quick lesson about dough for all your writing needs.

without getting into fussy details, there are four basic types of dough/batter. yeasted doughs, quick breads, laminated/pastry doughs, and unleavened doughs.

the only one of those that ever needs to rise is yeasted dough.

yeasted doughs are, as the name suggests, leavened with yeast. yeast is a microorganism that, when activated in water, feeds on sugars to produce gas. that gas, when trapped in dough, creates bubbles. most breads are yeasted, as are things like bagels, rolls, pizza crust, soft pretzels, english muffins, etc. yeasted doughs are also typically made by kneading, a process that develops the sticky gluten in wheat and makes the dough strong enough to hold onto itself and gives a pleasantly chewy result. (sourdough is also yeasted, but it's made by capturing wild yeast from the air rather than using prepackaged yeast.)

quick breads are leavened with baking soda and/or baking powder. these agents do not need rise time, as the chemical reaction happens when they are introduced to water/acid and heat. muffins, pancakes, cake, and sweet breads like banana, pumpkin, and zucchini are quick breads, and not only are they not kneaded, they shouldn't be overworked. overworking activates the gluten in the wheat, which isn't desired in these soft, tender breads. cookies and brownies would go under this umbrella as well.

laminated/pastry dough is leavened by thin layers of cold butter reaching a quick boiling point and releasing a steam that separates the layers of dough. this effect can be most clearly seen in something like a croissant, though croissants are also yeasted. pie crusts, most biscuits (the american kind), scones, and many other types of pastries are made this way. any time a recipes instructs you to "cut" butter into flour, this is what you're doing. phyllo, the type of dough used to make baklava, uses a similar process where oil or melted butter is brushed between paper-thin sheets of dough.

unleavened dough is exactly that, unleavened. there is nothing in this dough that makes it rise. pasta, many crackers, some flatbreads like tortillas - they don't rise at all. you do, on the other hand, typically have to let it rest for at least fifteen minutes, as the mixing of the dough creates elastic gluten strands that will resist attempts to roll it out.

special mention: whipped egg whites. when eggs are whipped into stiff peaks, they become filled with air, and some recipes use whipped egg whites folded carefully into batter as a leavener. angel food cake, for example, is leavened with nothing but egg whites. many cake recipes use this technique, as it creates a very light and delicate result.

SO. please take this knowledge and incorporate it in your writing as you will. thank you. <3

ps: things that are gluten free never require kneading, as there is no gluten to develop. gluten free baking is an alchemy which i do not pretend to understand.

[sixsixtooo]

some general 4na meals tips:

1. i know volume eating makes u feel disgusting but u need to do it. eating a bite of chocolate here and a sip of a latte there is going to make u b1nge; find a veg that u LOVE (i promise there is one) and eat that for every meal if u can

2. avoid sauces!!! they’re all either mayo or butter based and both of those are soooo insanely high c4l. if u can’t give them up, try a yogurt base sauce (or just substitute yogurt for mayo!) bc at least that way u can get some protein in

3. eggs are your friend!! coming from someone who hateeees eggs- u can essentially make any low c4l bread or cake with whipped egg whites, sweetener, and a little baking powder, and they are pretty much all protein. my fav recipes all come from @/mylightkitchen on insta!

4. invest some energy into making your food look pretty, even if it’s just a little herb garnish or switching up your plate to one that fits the vibe better. it’s easier to eat low c4l foods that u may not want to if it looks cute, and swiping through my own mealsp0 is soooo motivating and rewarding.

5. diet sodas will save ur life. the sugar from it (even if its not real) always keeps me sooo full and if soda isn’t your thing, lemon juice + 0c4l sweetener + water/tea for a lemonade works wonders as well. stay hydrated!! i set reminders on my phone every hour to remind me to drink SOMETHING, bc if im full from a coke zero then im not eating :)

6. lastly, this one is sososo important; if u are b1nging frequently, you need to up your daily c4l limit. it’s going to make u feel like shit and like a w4nnar3xic but if u can’t stay consistent nothing is going to work. 1000 c4ls a day is better than a 300c4l to 3000 bing3 r3strict cycle

anyways that’s all :) lmk if there’s anything i missed and ur own tips/thoughts/concerns

[phr3ia]

Fragmented Glass (Satoru Gojo x Fem!Reader) [Chapter 5 : Charm]

Satoru didn't had sex with you again last night, for reasons you no longer cared to understand. You were becoming used to skipping it every night, and honestly, you preferred it that way.

You made your way downstairs the next morning, wrapped in a bathrobe, your hair untamed in tousled waves. Opening the kitchen door, you could smell the rich aroma of delicious coffee wafting through the air.

Your eyes landed on Satoru, standing in front of the counter wearing an apron. He beamed at you, holding two steaming cups of coffee.

"Morning, Y/N. Here, I made you your favorite cappucinno, and I cooked some eggs and pancakes as well." he said, handing you the cup.

Your eyebrows furrowed as you stared at him. Obviously his attempts and this sudden acts of kindness left you baffled. "What are you doing?" You asked, stepping away from him as you rejected to accept the offered coffee.

"Nothing." Satoru shrugged, grinning.

"Stop it." you coldly responded, refusing to be drawn into his game.

Despite your annoyance, Satoru grabbed your wrist and led you to the chair, urging you to sit. "Come on, don't be stubborn. At least take a sip of the coffee, it'll warm you up." He insisted as he served you a plate of pancakes.

Satoru then took a seat across from you.

"So, did you get enough sleep last night?" he asked, staring at you with a bright smile on his face.

"Yes." you stated bluntly.

"I am glad to hear that. How was your bath? Did you take a hot shower?" Satoru inquired, his eyes gleaming.

"My shower was fine. Yes, the water was hot." you responded dryly.

He nodded, satisfied with your answer before asking, "Do you need assistance in your daily task today? Like cooking or cleaning, perhaps?"

"No. I can handle it myself." you said quickly.

Satoru chuckled. "Now, what do you prefer in your pancakes? Syrup, butter, whipped cream, fruit toppings?"

"Syrup." you answered, starting to get agitated at his persistence.

"Fantastic. So which syrup flavor? Maple, Blueberry, Strawberry, Banana, or Honey?"

"Maple syrup, okay?" you snapped.

"Do you prefer your eggs scrambled or sunny-side up?"

"Scrambled." you gritted your teeth.

Satoru poured the syrup generously on your pancakes. "Do you want your toast toasted darkly or lightly?"

"Lightly." you said, unable to hold your irritation any longer.

"When you bake, what's the sweetness level you normally go with?"

"Medium." you growled.

He grinned and sprinkled some powdered sugar all over your pancakes. "So let's talk about music. Do you prefer jazz, pop, rock, classical orchestral or heavy metal?"

"Classical." you muttered in frustration, pushing yourself up from the chair and flinging your coffee onto the floor.

"What's the matter?" Satoru asked.

After throwing the coffee, you stormed out of the kitchen, leaving him behind. Satoru looked down at the coffee stain on the floor as he let out a sigh. He couldn't comprehend your reaction, nor what triggered it.

Satoru started questioning himself internally. "Was it the pancakes?" he pondered, lifting one to his mouth. "Perhaps the texture of the batter or the way they're cooked rubbed you the wrong way? Could it be that she like it thicker or thinner? But, no. I've already adjusted my recipe multiple times."

He examined the syrup, checking if it was too runny or too thick. "Maybe she wanted something else, different flavor or... stronger taste. Oh, wait. No. She said 'Maple.' didn't she?"

Satoru mulled over your preferences, considering if there was something he overlooked. "Her toast, yes. I remember. She likes it lightly toasted. Maybe it went a little darker than usual, and it's weighing on her mind, subconsciously affecting her mood."

He took a bite of the toast. "Nope, it's not the toast."

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

"What the hell is going on with him?" you muttered under your breath, slamming the bedroom door behind you.

Your fingers ran through your hair, tugging slightly in frustration.

"He can't possibly be this nice to me, he's mocking me. Or trying to make me crack somehow." you thought, eyes closed tight.

Sighing heavily, you sat up, rubbing your temples in an effort to quell the growing headache.

"I'll ignore him, I don't care. I won't partake in his little game. This is all for show, for others, not for me. He doesn't care about anyone, except for himself." you told yourself firmly, determined to remain stoic and unmoved.

Slowly, you dragged yourself out of bed, intending to go about your routine, refusing to let Satoru's behavior affect you.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

It was your husband's day off, and you were desperate to avoid being stuck with him in the house. His behavior had been getting weirder by the day, and you had no desire to spend any more time with him than necessary.

You slipped on your sneakers and grabbed your backpack.

"Where are you going?" he asked, blocking your path.

You brushed past him, ignoring his question.

[Dogenzaka]

The sound of a roaring engine pulled your attention to the street. You spotted Satoru's silver McLaren, and there he was, leaning against the side with a grin.

"Taking a stroll? Where do you plan to go?"

"None of your business." You quickened your pace, desperate to put distance between you and him.

"Oy!" he exclaimed. Satoru slowed his car as he spoke to you.

"To the bookstore, now leave me alone." you said, irritated by his incessant chatter.

"Bookstore? That's brilliant! Have you found any good books lately? Any series worth recommending?"

Ignoring his questions, you dashed towards the nearest bookstore, feeling grateful for the traffic light turning red, halting Satoru from driving any closer. As you crossed the street, you glanced back, a wave of relief washing over you when you saw him turned his car around the corner.

As soon as you stepped into the cool, calm atmosphere of the bookstore, you inhaled deeply, captivated by the scent of old pages mixed with fresh ink from newly published books. You wandered off, navigating through the maze of shelved literature, vowing to find a book to lose yourself in.

You reached the fantasy section, and Satoru's voice echoed through the room, "Have you heard of the Death March series? It's quite popular, you might like it."

"What the hell?! How did he get here so fast?!" you silently screamed in your thoughts.

Ignoring his comment, you picked up a book that caught your eye, flipped through its pages, then set it back down and selected another.

"Or perhaps you'd prefer something Sci-Fi, the Game World Online series is making waves. Have a read, I think you'd appreciate it!" Satoru suggested loudly, his voice drawing the attention of several nearby customers.

Again, you feigned deafness, walking toward the history section, your anger toward Satoru mounting with each passing second.

"Or maybe Historical Fantasy is more your speed? The Last Emperor series is phenomenal! The lead character gets reincarnated into ancient China." Satoru tried again.

"Shut up!" you whispered fiercely, turning around to face him. "Why the hell are you following me? I wanted some peace for once."

Satoru's smile widened "Because I wanted to help you find a good read. You seemed lost, so I wanted to assist."

"Assist me by minding your own business!" you hissed.

Satoru's taunts were becoming annoying, but you refused to let it affect you. You continued your browsing, focusing on finding the perfect book to lose yourself in, silently swearing at the top of your head to ignore Satoru's presence.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

For several more weeks, Satoru's attempt to win you over continued. There were days when he returned home with takeouts from fancy restaurants, claiming the food was too good to eat alone, thrusting them into your reluctant arms.

And some days, he would suddenly appear at the front door, offering you a ride in his fanciest car.

But no matter how he tried to get your attention, you always brushed him off, ignoring him as if he were a ghost.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Despite your intentions to unwind and relax, a dull ache of boredom chewed on you. So you decided to visit the elderly people, only to discover that Satoru had bought them their own flower shop. And when you got to the animal shelter, you found out that it had been relocated to a larger area, sponsored by Satoru. And lastly, he also covered a year's worth of medical expenses for the women who were undergoing psychological treatment for abuse.

It finally dawned on you that he had been trailing you right from the very start, even before he began his ridiculous antics. You felt foolish, because deep down you had hoped that he was being genuine about everything. There was a moment where Satoru almost melted your frozen heart. But you had just confirmed your suspicions that he was doing this to gain something in return. You couldn't believe that he even went so far as to use the kids at the orphanage.

As Satoru entered the house, the silence was heavy and thick. His steps echoed within the empty space, making it clear that you'd been waiting for him.

You stood facing the hallway, your arms crossed tightly as you glared at him "How long have you been doing this?"

Satoru paused, unsure of how to approach the topic. "Doing what exactly?" he asked, feigning ignorance.

"Following me, observing, interfering, providing, when did it start?" you spat, unamused by his oblivious act.

Satoru sighed. He could tell that you had finally uncovered the truth. Perhaps some of the people couldn't keep it a secret that he was helping them. "A month and a half ago."

"Why?" you demanded, agitated by his actions. "You've been doing all this for show, haven't you? To crack me open, to mock me, to toy with my emotions, to give me false hope?! It's all part of your little game, isn't it?" you accused.

Satoru couldn't answer, not because he was guilty, but from the unfamiliar sensation of witnessing your tears.

"I've had enough. It might have taken me a while, but I am done playing your sick, twisted games. I'm calling off our marriage."

Your words were met with frustration and disbelief. Satoru's eyes widened in response, an emotion he rarely displayed. "Y/N, you can't just walk away from this. The higher ups...They will surely punish you if you run away from this marriage."

Ignoring him, you headed towards the door, no longer intimidated by Satoru, only motivated by your need to escape from the miserable experience that this marriage had become.

Satoru's hand shot out to grasp your wrist, a rare sign of desperation in his movements. "Wait. Please, at least hear me out."

You shook your wrist free from his grip and turned to face him, your eyes filled with a determination to end this charade. "There's nothing more to understand. If you want to redeem yourself, do it in a manner that doesn't involve trickery and deceit. You've lost, Satoru."

And with those final words, you walked out of his life, leaving the door wide open, symbolizing the end of a chapter that never should've begun.

•┈••✦ ❤ ✦••┈•

End of Chapter 5 🥀...

@kalopsia-flaneur @thatmartinkitten @staruus

[posttexasstressdisorder]

Cake For Breakfast

Orange Layer Cake, with Orange Cream Cheese Frosting, that is!

I've been wanting to do an absolutely orange cake for awhile.

I ended up improvising (as usual) on the recipe (which I will type up and post with a reblog) and it came out exactly like I like cake: dense, moist, and packed with flavor.

This is one that should be refrigerated, definitely. We're working with fresh orange juice and zest, so fridging is necessary. It doesn't really matter as far as the immense flavor goes!

The crumb is nigh what I call perfect for a scratch cake. Super-dense, moist, and flecked with orange zest. The orange cream cheese frosting is also flecked with zest and packed with the flavor of fresh orange juice. No artificial orange flavoring or extract needed!

Both the cake and frosting are lightly colored with a few drops of high-quality gel "Sunset Orange" food coloring.

Also made a home-made Orange Sherbert to go with. I will post all the recipe and more pics later today.

--------------------------------

What started all this off was the idea of making a cake that tasted like the old Dreamsicles of the '60s-'70s. The ones made now don't compare...the solution, I figured, had to be the perfect combo of orange and vanilla, so this is what I aimed for.

TO MAKE THE CAKE:

3 cups flour

2 cups granulated sugar

3/4 cup butter (1 1/2 sticks)

2 tspn baking powder

1/2 tspn baking soda

1/2 tspn salt

4 eggs

2 tspns vanilla extract

3/4 cup whole milk

1/3 can of frozen pure orange juice concentrate

The zest of half of a large orange.

6-7 drops Sunset Orange gel food coloring

Procedurally, it's like any other scratch cake: begin by creaming butter/sugar/vanilla together, add eggs one at a time, alternate between adding your liquids and the flour/solids.

Note on creaming the first ingredients: use this time to add the food coloring and freshly grated zest from half of a large navel orange. Set the orange and grater aside to use when making the frosting.

Note on the liquids: take a 2-cup pyrex measuring cup, and pour 3/4 cup whole milk in. Now open the can of frozen orange juice and spoon in enough to bring the level up to 1 and 1/3 cups. Stir/mix the orange juice concentrate into the milk until it is smooth. Alternate adding THAT mix with the dry ingredients until all is used.

Bake at 350 for about 25-30 mins, use toothpick test. Rack in pans for about 15 mins and turn out onto wire racks. Let cool completely before frosting.

Makes 2 9" round layers.

TO MAKE THE FROSTING:

2 8oz bricks cream cheese

3/4 cup butter (stick and a half)

2 lb bag powdered sugar

2 tspn vanilla extract

grated zest of the other half of the large orange, plus the juice from one of the cut halves.

6-7 drops gel Sunset Orange food coloring

Cream together the cream cheese and butter until they are fluffy. Add the vanilla and food coloring, orange zest and keep the mixer going while slowly adding the powdered sugar until it is all in. Add your juice from half of the orange as needed to thin it down to proper consistency/sheen.

I refrigerated the frosting for a few hours while the cake cooled, and then put the entire cake in the fridge, frosted, uncut, overnight, to set the outside of the frosting and make for easy cutting.

TO MAKE THE ORANGE SHERBERT:

1 2/3 cans frozen pure pulp-free orange juice concentrate

1 can sweetened condensed milk (Eagle Brand, etc)

1 3/4 cups granulated sugar

2 tspns vanilla extract

1 quart heavy whipping cream

5-6 drops of Sunset Orange food coloring.

Use the whip attachment of the mixer and mix the orange juice concentrate with the sweetened canned milk, food coloring and vanilla. Slowly ramp up the speed until it is beginning to whip. slowly pour in the quart of whipping cream, and then add the sugar as the mixture whips on the highest speed. Give it about 5-6 minutes or longer, and you will have stiff peaks (or close too), and a near soft-serve consistency. Pour immediately into two loaf pans and cover with plastic wrap and freeze for at least 24 hours before serving.

[thebluestbluewords]

Jane’s Recipe Blog: Summer Birthday Cake

(irl recipe is modified from weekend at the cottage Harvey Wallbanger Cake)

Magic Mix Orange Liqueur Cake

posted by user: Sugar

to: sugarandspikes.auradon.blog 

date: 27 of June, Summer 

Summertime, and the living is busy! I don't know about you, but between my school and my family, I've spent 72 of the last 78 hours running around like a chicken with my head cut off.

the girls are enjoying the summer weather at least! My roommate's boyfriend brought home another crate of chicks for the flock last week. We're being overrun with eggs. Expect more eggy recipes very soon!!

If you're anything like me, summer is the busiest time of year. School programs for me and Spikes are both picking up the pace with our summer service hours, and I've got my roommate and her boyfriend home all the time while they're on break. It's great having the extra hands around the house, but it also means that we've been visiting and hosting family and friends basically non-stop since the summer started. 

I love baking. I love my family. I love watching my family enjoy my baking. But do you know what I don't love? 

Missing out on those special summer moments because I'm spending every moment I'm home in the kitchen. 

That's why this is the absolute easiest-ever summer cake. It's moist, soft, and packed full of the most delicious orange flavor. The orange glaze is easy to whip up in a few minutes, and it's a great excuse to buy a new whisk!

Check out my lemon bars recipe post for the story of how my last whisk died 😱

The non-stick coating on my new whisk makes it great for whipping up glazes, syrups, honeys, and other sticky sauces. Once things calm down, I'm thinking of making a lavender-infused honey glaze to put on my lemon poppy seed muffins for that little extra touch of sweetness. 

And speaking of nonstick, the coating on the whisk makes it non-magnetic! Which is GREAT if you're like me and hosting any fairy friends this summer. Magnetic fields play havoc with flower fairy equilibrium. It's cool to be kind to our neighbors and avoid cooking with magnets when you're making treats for non-humanoids. 

That being said, this cake doesn't involve any time boiling hot syrups, which makes it perfect for hot days like we've been having in Auradon lately. It also goes perfectly with a cold glass of lemonade, or a cup of iced ginger tea. The orange in the cake will meld great with lemon or ginger flavors, or provide a beautiful contrast to some black coffee, if you're just trying to get through the day 🙃

Sugar Says: 

Watch your oven temp on this one - it's easy to underbake and end up with a cake that's still soggy in the middle. 

If you like a more flavorful glaze, add an extra splash of vanilla to your mix. If you're serving this to kids, omit the vodka and swap for equal parts water or orange juice. (coconut water is also a delicious swap!) 

Make sure to double check the size of your boxed cake mix BEFORE you add it to the bowl! A double size box mix may look good to your eyes, but it'll look a lot less good when it overflows your bowl and takes over your entire kitchen. 

Spikes Says: 

Why are there like four cups of booze in the cake??

I don't think it's fair to tell the kids they can't have this 

We need to make a chocolate version of this STAT.

Sugar Says:

Magic Mix Chocolate Cherry Rum cake is going on the test kitchen list for the holidays!

THE RECIPE:

INGREDIENTS

For the cake:

1 box deluxe yellow cake mix

1 package vanilla flavoured cooked pudding and pie filling

1 cup canola oil

3/4 cup orange juice, fresh or from concentrate 

1/4 cup vodka

1/4 cup Galliano liqueur

4 eggs 

Softened butter (for pan) 

For the glaze:

1 1/2 cup icing sugar

1 tablespoon orange juice 

1 tablespoon Galliano liqueur

1 teaspoon vodka

DIRECTIONS

Preheat the oven to 350°F. 

Grease a Bundt pan. Or a regular cake pan. I’m not your mom. A cupcake tin will also work, but know that this case doesn’t rise a ton, so you may need to fill your cupcakes higher than usual to compensate. 

Add the cake mix and pudding mix into a medium-sized bowl. 

Add oil, orange juice, vodka, Galliano, and eggs. A stand mixer will make this step easier, or you can conscript your boyfriend into mixing it at a low steady speed for 2 minutes 🙂

Pour the cake mixture into the prepared pan. Tap the pan on the counter to pop any bubbles in the batter.

Bake for 50 to 60 minutes. A toothpick inserted in the center should come out clean. 

Let the cake cool. This step is essential. Fend off any partners who want to eat the cake hot out of the pan. Let cool about 20 minutes, or one really vicious round of Uno.

Once cake is partially cool, gently loosen the edges. Invert onto a plate. 

Let the cake cool completely at room temperature (about 3-4 hours) before frosting. Do not try and hide the cake in the freezer. It will not work. They will eat it anyway and you’ll have to start over. 

To glaze: 

Mix the icing sugar, orange juice, Galliano liqueur and vodka until the mixture is smooth. Add more orange juice just a few drops at a time to achieve a thinner consistency. 

Drizzle the glaze over the cake. Allow time for glaze to set before eating. 

[jess-the-reckless]

Funny thing about baking, is that I still bake some recipes in Imperial, despite being mostly metric. This is because my basic sponge cake recipe comes down from my grandmother, who was born in 1916 and never had any truck with any of that grams nonsense.

Basic sponge cake recipe is always super easy to remember in Imperial, anyway - 666, the number of the beast. 6oz self raising flour, 6oz butter, 6oz caster sugar, and three medium sized eggs. This one is a gluten-free take on the classic Victoria sponge, but with some fresh raspberries, because summer berries demand cake, and cream.

So, for the cake...

6oz/170g butter

6oz/170g caster sugar

6oz/170g self raising gluten-free flour

1tsp xanthan gum

Three eggs

Zest of a lemon

Splash of amaretto (optional)

Now, here's the bit where the metric system comes in handy, because even my dyscalculic brain can handle this in metric. If your gluten-free flour is not self raising, there's a simple percentage you can do to make it so. To make self raising flour you just need 5% of the total flour weight.

170g ÷ 100 = 1.7

1.7 x 5 = 8.5

So you need 8.5g (or thereabouts) of baking powder, in a bowl, on a scale, and then you top up that bowl with flour until it reaches your required 170g. To that I then add a teaspoon of xanthan gum, a game-changing stabilizer in all gluten-free baking. This shit will not only give you a beautiful fluffy crumb structure, but will also render your gluten-free shortcrust pastry smooth and manageable. I've even pulled off pate sucree with its assistance.

After that, you just cake away as usual - cream together the butter and sugar until fluffy, slowly add the eggs while mixing, then flavour with the zest of a lemon, and a splash of amaretto if you are, like me, an incorrigible girl-drink drunk. Sift and fold in your dry ingredients, then divide the mixture between two well greased and lined 9 inch cake pans. Bake at 180C (and I'm sorry, but I have no idea how Fahrenheit works) for about 15 minutes, or until a skewer poked into the middle of each cake comes clean. Leave to cool for a while in the tin, then turn out onto a rack to cool completely, and I do mean completely.

For the filling you simply need double cream and icing sugar. Again, I'm going metric, and Nan will have to churn in her urn once more about it. You calculate 16% of your cream volume in ml, then convert that to grams of sugar. This ratio should give you perfectly stabilized whipped cream every time, and it's easily flavoured with lemon zest, cocoa powder, coffee essence, or whatever else you fancy.

So - take 150mls of double cream, whisk it up until just starting to thicken, then add 24g of icing sugar according to my (probably shonky) mathematics. Whisk again until nicely fluffy, then slap it all over the lower layer cake as filling. I then pressed a bunch of fresh raspberries into the filling before putting on the top layer, and dusting with icing sugar. You can also level your cakes if you need to, although mine took the opportunity to rise perfectly and uniformly, which almost never happens to me.

This one is best kept in the fridge on account of the whipped cream, where it will last for a couple of days, in theory. In practice it usually gets et. Fast.

[skaiwrites]

Gluten-Free Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream; No Ice Cream Machine Required. A Recipe*:

Total Time:

Like two days; this is not a short process

Ingredients: Total (Ice Cream Amount; Cookie Dough Amount [recommended adjustment due to weirdly specific measurements])

Butter, Unsalted**: 1 Stick (1/16 Stick***; 15/16 Stick****)

Light Brown Sugar, Packed: 15 1/2 Tablespoons (1/2 Cups; 7 1/2 Tablespoons)

Granulated Sugar: ~6 3/4 Tablespoons (1/4 Cups; 2 13/16 Tablespoons [measure 2 3/4 tbsp, add just a tiny bit more, whatever you believe in your heart to be an extra 1/16 tablespoon. Alternatively: 2 tbsp + 1/2 tbsp + ever so slightly less than 1 tsp])

Salt: ~1/4 Teaspoons (just a Dash, whatever you define that as; 15/64 Teaspoons [just do 1/4 Teaspoons]

Vanilla Extract: ~3 Teaspoons (2 Teaspoons; 15/16 Teaspoons [basically just 1 Teaspoon. measure a little light if you feel like it])

Gluten-Free All-Purpose Flour: 15 Tablespoons (0; 15 Tablespoons)

Pasteurized***** Liquid Egg Substitute: ~2 3/4 Tablespoons (0; 2 13/16 Tablespoons [see note for Granulated Sugar])

Chocolate Chips: 7 1/2 Tablespoons (0; 7 1/2 Tablespoons)

Milk: 2 1/4 Cups (2 1/4 Cups; 0)

Heavy Whipping Cream: 1 Cup (1 Cup; 0)

Chocolate Syrup: 1 Teaspoon (1 Teaspoon; 0)

Required Non-measurement Tools:

5 Bowls, preferably metal. 2 should be the same, roughly medium capacity size. A third should be large enough to fit one of the other two inside of it with room to spare. The fourth needs to be large enough to mix a very small amount of cookie dough inside of. The fifth just needs to be big enough to hold a cup of flour.

A lid to cover one of your medium bowls (it does not have to be a perfect fit).

Either plastic wrap or another lid to cover the other of your medium bowls (does need to be a perfect fit)

Some sort of mixing instrument. I recommend you use something electric.

Something to stir with, a wooden spoon or rubber spatula, for example.

Baking Sheet.

Saucepan.

Freezer.

Oven.

Stove.

Prep:

Night before starting, get out one of your 2 smaller bowls, whichever is best suited for mixing. Place it in the freezer to chill (we will call this our "freezer bowl")

At some point before making the cookie dough, you will want to Pasteurize your flour. This is the shortest part of the process and keeps you safe from deadly diseases, so it's not really worth skipping: Preheat your oven to 375°F (191°C). Spread your flour evenly on your baking sheet. Place in oven at 375° for 10 minutes. Take out of oven and allow to cool.

Immediately before making the ice cream, take your other two bowls. Fill the larger one partway with ice and water. Place the smaller one inside the larger one so that the ice water will keep it cold (we will call the smaller bowl our "chilling bowl").

Making the Cookie Dough:

(i recommend you wait until after you've already started making the ice cream since this takes not nearly as long)

Add 15 tablespoons Pasteurized Gluten-Free All-Purpose Flour to a small bowl.

Add 15/64 (~1/4) teaspoons Salt to your flour bowl.

In a different mixing bowl, add 2 13/16 (~2 3/4) tablespoons granulated sugar.

Add 7 1/2 tablespoons packed Light Brown Sugar.

Add 15/16 (~1) teaspoon Vanilla Extract.

Add 15/16 stick of room temperature Butter.

Beat mixture until creamy/thoroughly mixed.

Add 2 13/16 (~2 3/4) tablespoons Pasteurized Liquid Egg Substitute, mixing thoroughly as you add.

Gradually add flour/salt mixture into mixing bowl, mixing thoroughly as you go.

Add 7 1/2 tablespoons chocolate chips. (you may choose to break some [doing all will be very tedious] of your chocolate ships into smaller pieces to make them roll into small balls easier. if you choose to do this, i recommend saving the chocolate chip crumbs and instead of adding them to your cookie dough, adding them directly to the ice cream to give it an extra chocolate chip taste even when you aren't biting into a cookie dough ball)

Mix until chocolate chips are evenly distributed.

Roll mixture into small balls of cookie dough (i would recommend placing them in your now empty flour bowl as you go). Balls should be about 1/4 teaspoon or a little smaller than half the tip of your pinky finger. For reference, each ball should be big enough to contain exactly one chocolate chip and still have a little doughy padding on the side.

Place dough balls into freezer to chill so that when you mix them into your ice cream later, they don't break apart.

Making the Ice Cream:

Pour 2 1/4 cups Milk into a saucepan.

Add 1 cup Heavy Whipping Cream to the saucepan.

Add 1/4 cups Granulated Sugar. Stir lightly to avoid clumps.

Place saucepan on stove burner on low heat.

Take 1/2 cups of packed Light Brown Sugar, and sprinkle it into the saucepan (you don't want clumps of brown sugar in your ice cream. so, since you packed it to measure it, you need to de-pack/re-fluff it as you add it to the cream).

Stir until you can't feel any clumps (a little graininess is fine for the time being).

Add 1 teaspoon chocolate syrup. Stir briefly.

Add 1/16 stick of butter.

Sprinkle in a little bit of salt (measure with your heart. i think i shook a salt shaker like 3 or 4 times)

Stir until all ingredients are fully melted/dissolved, no grains of sugar can be felt, and the mixture is hot. A thin film of foam should have begun to form at the top of the cream and be sticking to edge of the saucepan a bit (little tiny bubbles, almost too small to instantly recognize them as bubbles. they'll make the top of the cream look a few shades lighter in color than the part underneath them)

Pour Cream Mixture into Chilling Bowl. (we are done with the saucepan forever)

Add 2 teaspoons vanilla extract. Stir until the vanilla extract does not separate from the cream.

Cover Chilling Bowl and let sit in its ice bath for 20 minutes.

Transfer cream mixture into Freezer Bowl.

a) Place Freezer Bowl back into the freezer.

b) Let sit for 30 minutes to an hour, or until edges just begin to solidify. (this may take many hours depending on the temperature of your freezer) (the amount of time you let it sit in the freezer between mixings will determine how creamy it is when you're done. The longer you leave it in the freezer without mixing it, the more ice crystals will form, and the less creamy it will be.)

c) Take the Freezing Bowl out of the freezer.

d) Beat the mixture thoroughly, until any frozen bits are well mixed into the cream. Your goal is to break apart any ice crystals that have formed and to whip extra air into the cream so it remains soft and easy to scoop when it becomes fully frozen later.

Repeat steps (a) through (d) until mixture has reached your desired level of creaminess. (i recommend making the cookie dough during the first or second (b) interval since you're going to be waiting a while anyways)

Beat the mixture one more time.

Slowly mix your ice cream as you add your chocolate chip cookie dough balls to the mixture. (the cookie dough recipe makes a little bit more cookie dough than you probably want [you would be disappointed if it made less than you want, and there's no way for me to predict exactly how much you want, hence overestimating], so you may not necessarily want to put all the cookie dough in the ice cream. you can use the rest to make 2 or 3 cookies if you want; just make the dough balls cookie sized and place in the oven at 375°F for about 9 minutes)

Mix until the cookie dough balls are evenly distributed to your liking.

Place bowl back in the freezer.

Once it freezes again, you will have chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. do whatever you want with it.

*i made the recipe myself, based on a lot of different recipes for cookie dough and ice cream, separately. The measurements are a little bit weird in some places because of conversions required to not have to get out a whole extra stick of butter just to use half a tablespoon from it.

**i used unsalted butter because it's what i had in the house. if you want to use salted butter, just do your best to adjust the rest of the salt in the recipe accordingly

***1/2 tablespoons

****the rest of the stick (7 1/2 tablespoons)

*****please don't get people sick by feeding them uncooked and unpasteurized eggs