#little floppy fish!

[magicalflyingcow]

Y'all I just made a little animated pixel sprite. It is so stupid, but weirdly I am so proud of this little guy

[piranha-shan]

Look at this fish. Predominant colors? Green and red.

Now look at this guy.

Green shirt, red jacket.

I mean. Look at the similarities.

I think Theron’s design was inspired off a piranha.

[aspenshadow]

My straight dad traits that automatically put people off -guard:

"Hey there CHAMP! How's it going?"

"Wow! Great handshake, love it."

Button-ups only

[sockenpuppe]

found my old flappy bird clone from back when I started to mess around with blender and unity

i simply called it floppy fish (i thought it was hilarious don't judge me)

i ... wanted to know if i could get it to work on my phone

so yeah ... here it is

it does work

the colliders are still shitty but who cares

also look at this dumb fish:

yesss that's the character model

still like it

[i-am-literally-deranged]

Arrested for being a public menace

[profic-mafuyu]

🐹🐹🐹🐹🐹🐹

(perhaps between that and 🐰idk, but the point gets across)

>:( /j

[yanderenightmare]

TW: nsfw, noncon/dubcon, violence/abuse, threat of bodily harm

gn reader

Thinking about poly yanderes again…

They’re both so patronizing – suffocatingly so. 

But where one is a brute, the other is sweet – or sweeter than the former, in any case...

He has a certain calm about him – gentle with you – considerate when showing his affection, and patient with you when he’s intimate. He doesn’t growl at you to shut up and lie still the way the other one does – instead, he asks you if you can be good for him – if you can let him love you – lipping at your throat without the touch of teeth as he all but begs for your consent.

The brute doesn't bother with such foreplay...

Your will doesn’t seem to interest him in any other aspect than ripping it from you and strangling it in his fist with a big grin, laughing while watching those pitiful tears start slipping down your cheeks.

He'll just shrug off the kinder one when he chides, telling him to stop being so rough with you. He just squeezes you a little tighter, sucks your neck a little harder, and kneads his cock a little deeper – saying that he can do whatever he wants with that which belongs to him.

When you struggle against him, he’s not shy of punishing you accordingly – in fact, he jumps at the opportunity – bending you over his lap with his fist riddled in your hair – landing strike after strike until you’re screaming in surrender, all cute pleas for his mercy, words he’s told you to say. 

He likes fucking you like that – when you’re a broken mess who only clings to him for comfort, crying into his neck while he pumps you full of cock and cum.

The kinder one scolds him afterward. Tells him he’s a fiend while petting your head and hair, carrying you away from the scene and into the bathroom. He draws you a tub of bubbles and holds a glass of water to your lips. But for all his niceties – he still gets in the hot water with you – cock in your sore hole while he washes your hair.

Still, he’s more reasonable.

When he’s tying your wrists to the bedpost like every night of you sleeping stuck in between them, you ask him if it’s really necessary – promising him you’re not going to run away – telling him that you’re going to stay right there, peacefully asleep.

The brute says that it isn’t something that’s up for discussion, that if you push your luck, he’s gonna tie every inch of you up like a floppy fish caught in a net ready to be gutted. But you don’t heed the warning – looking to your kinder warden with puppy eyes and a pout on your lips, saying please, it hurts your wrists – again, promising him you’ll be good and stay sound asleep between them the entire night.

You just needed to get to the door. 

You just needed to get to the door – through the door – out into the street, screaming while at it, and surely someone, anyone, would come to your rescue. 

Why wouldn't your feet move quicker? Why weren’t you faster? Why were you clumsier now? Tripping over rugs, missing steps when scrambling down the stairs, slipping when turning corners – trying to navigate the house when you’d barely ever seen anything but the bedroom.

You just needed to get to the door – but you could hear one of them coming after you – just behind you – big monstrous thundering steps shaking you to the core, strangling your heart, shattering your bones – and it’s getting hard to breathe, hard to see, hard to feel anything other than the numbing fear and the awful way it cripples you – throwing your mind into a tailspin while choking your lungs free of all air, clawing up your throat into a scream. 

You just needed to get to the fucking door –

You hadn't known you could make a sound like that – like something out of a horror movie – high-pitched and desperate – ripped from somewhere raw and primal.

There’s a hand in your hair, yanking you backward where you’re received by a hard chest and an arm snaking around your waist, hoisting you off the ground, kicking and yelling.

It’s the brute. He looks almost happy you’d tried running away – a manic look of delight on his face when he finally drops you down on the floor – pinning you beneath him – shadowing you with teeth seemingly dripping with venom and all the ugly punishments he’s no doubt cooking up inside his sick mind.

“Your ass is gettin’ it extra fuckin’ hard tonight – my handprint won’t heal for a month – won’t even be able to sit down without cryin’.” He growls, his teeth on your cheek as he grips your jaw tight – starting off your punishment with a harsh lovebite.

You look at the more merciful of the two. 

He’s standing off to the side, looking down at the two of you. 

You expect he’d come to the rescue like he’d done all those other times.

But to your utter horror… he isn’t lifting a single finger to stop it. 

His face is blank – cold – as cold as the words that roll dryly off his tongue, “I think we’ve established that spanking isn’t enough…” 

The one holding you down halts in his advances and seems to get just as frigid as you by the cold-blooded tone of his partner – who takes slow steps toward the two of you, so close he’s got your hair pinned beneath his toes before crouching down until he as well looms over you like a darkening storm.

He reaches a stiff hand to soothe the ring of teeth left on your cheek by the other – seemingly kindly, but his eyes are so jaded your breath catches in your throat – soulless as they stare into your teary ones.

“Maybe we ought to get ahead of the issue and break your legs.” He suggests nonchalantly, making both your and your other captor’s faces bleach.

Then he smiles – that kind smile, only now you can’t help but flinch at the sight of it. 

“That way, everyone’s happy,” He states, explaining, “You won't have to be tied up, and we can trust you to keep your word and stay put when you promise us you will.”

Then he stands up and straightens himself, looking at his partner with that same eerie smile.

“Where’d you put the bat again?”

The brute stiffens. His crazed expression had melted in light of the other into a look you’d never seen on him before. He swallows thickly as though he’s just as worried as you are. His voice is hesitant, “I think rope is enough…” 

The other throws his brows up. “Oh?” Then he snaps his focus back to you. “What do you think, baby? You think that’s enough?” He walks back to the two of you, and you feel the intense urge to hide behind the one you’d initially been caught running from.

He looks down at you expectantly, watching your lip quiver as you struggle to form an answer without choking on it.

“Hm? What was that? Rope or bat, what do you prefer?” His voice is sharp, licking at you like a knife.

You stutter, “Ro-rope.”

“Yeah? Okay, then – that’s settled.” He confirms, then looks back at the other. “Go get the rope.”

It doesn’t seem like he wants to leave – almost like he’s afraid of what might happen if he does. “Now?” He asks.

“Yes, now.” The smile tightens – sharpens into something truly lethal if you were to test it. “Our pet thinks they can run wild, so we’ll have to reintroduce them to the leash.”

Then he sets his sights back on you, robbing you of all air.

“Unless you’d prefer the bat after all?”

You whimper, shaking your head with a sniffle, “No-no – rope…”

He looks back to the other. “You heard 'em. Get going.”

He’s reluctant about it – looking from you to him, then back to you again, almost apologetically – before he gets up off you, leaving you on the floor – alone.

Your hair is then grabbed harshly, and you’re pulled up to your feet before you’re dragged off them – pulled along until you’re tugged from the floor up onto his lap as he plopped down, comfortably seated on the couch.

He sighs, letting go of your hair and placing both hands on the fat of your haunches, making you straddle him – mirroring your breathless, tear-streaked face with an expressionless one.

A hand ascends, and you’re convinced he’s going to slap you – but as you squeeze your eyes tightly shut in wait for it, his hand finds your cheek, only to ever-so-gently pet the wet away.

Cupping your face, he places a light peck on the corner of your mouth, followed by his voice, “Apologize, and I’ll forgive you.”

Your eyes peel open, looking back into his. You regret it instantly. Still eclipsed, it’s a cold and blank stare that seems to seize you by the throat.

“I’m sorry, I’ll never- never ever do it again.” You whisper pitifully – as if you’re afraid to be too loud.

“Hm…” He hums, looking unimpressed. “I don’t think that’s good enough…” 

His hand slips from your face down your neck, circling it lightly before squeezing it firmly with whitening knuckles. “You hurt my feelings, y’know? I trusted you, and you lied to me – right to my fucking face.”

You cack, wrapping your smaller hands around his wrist as he strangles the words out of you. “I’m sorry- I’m really- really sorry-”

His breathing is thick, as though something’s bubbling underneath the surface – a beast within whose bloodthirst hasn’t yet been sated. “I want more than empty words.” He states flatly, unforgivingly.

Still, he lets go of your throat, letting you drop to his chest, panting sore breaths with his words ringing hot in your head. You start kissing between sipping for air – desperately, up his neck and jaw, then his lips, even though he doesn’t kiss back – pleading, “Please forgive me- I’m sorry, I-”

“Yeah? You’re sorry?” He mocks, stroking the back of your head, down your back as though soothing you – voice dripping with fake empathy. “Sorry for what exactly? Hm? For being a dumb little bitch, thinking you could run when you haven’t even so much as walked on your own two feet for months.”

A laugh inches into his words like a sickness. The eerie smile returns, small and curling in the corner of his mouth.

“You were fuckin’ hilarious, you know that?” He breathes lightly – eyes wide, staring at you like cornered prey. “Trippin’ over yer own two feet, barely even making it to the door.”

The grip around your throat returns, and you squeak out a whimper.

“Say it.” He seethes, “Say you’re a dumb little bitch who didn’t know what you were doing.” His lips ghost yours with the command, forcing you to echo the words back into his mouth.

“I’m- I’m a dumb little bitch- I’m- I didn’t know what I was doing-” 

He hums at your shivering but doesn’t ease his grip – molding his lips against yours, he kisses you deeply until parting with your lips between his teeth – letting go slowly.

“I- I’ll be good from now on, I promise-” You add – in the hope it would thaw the ice of his stare.

It doesn’t. He keeps them just as jaded – half-masted now as he runs his fingers up and down your spine, brushing your chin and cheek with his lips until blowing on your ear. “You better be.”

You shudder, wincing.

“‘Cause if you ever try anything like that again, I’m gonna go get that bat – and nothing and no one is gonna keep me from bashing away at you until I’ve made certain you can’t lift a single fucking finger without my help.”

You’re a broken mess of sniveling apologies and prayers on his lap by the time the brute comes back with the rope. 

But the one who’d reduced you to it doesn’t seem bothered in the slightest. 

“There you are!” He beams with a bright smile.

Acting as though you weren’t falling apart in his arms, gripping his shirt for purchase while sobbing hard and ugly into his chest. 

“Let’s tie every square inch of 'em up like you suggested.” He muses while picking your tear-stained face up in both hands, nose-kissing you with his words dripping fondly off his tongue. “Just like a floppy fish ready to be gutted.”

BNHA – BakuDeku, DabiHawks, EndMight, ShinKami, TodoDeku, KiriBaku, Shiggy x villain!Deku

JJK – SatoSugu, YujiKuna, YujiGumi

HQ – Miya twins, IwaOi,

BLLK – NagiReo, KuniGiri

AOT - EreMin

DS - InoTan, DouAka

HxH – HisoIllu

[barksbog]

Mochi Glass-catfish

squishy little fishy

mmmmbones

soft floppy whiskers

rainbow

---

adopt a fish today fresh from the bog

barks-bog.com/shop

[bunnys-kisses]

bark, bark, bark

hybrid!john "soap" mactavish

cw: hybrid!au, smut/pwp, heat/rut, breeding, pregnancy, enemies-to-lovers, dog!reader, dog!john, owner!simon, doggy style filth

bunny says: like the fic? leave a comment! really love the fic? request your own!

"well, aren't ya just a dream." john said as he sat at the kitchen table. his tail swayed from side to side as he looked at you.

you were standing close to your new owner, simon riley. you had a pretty pink collar on and your ears were flat against your head. your arms were crossed and you looked annoyed.

john or 'soap' as simon called him, was a dog. as were you. while your breed was defined and regal. you were certain that simon found john behind a dumpster of a fish n' chips place. but you'd have to get along with your fellow hybrid if you didn't want to end up being re-homed.

john just thought you were perfect, but in as sneering kind of way. almost mocking as he pulled at your floppy ears and your hair. he even got you by the collar once and brought you to the tiled floor of the farmhouse the three of you lived in.

you'd often yip and growl at one another in the living room as you fought over the remote. which often left you both scolded by your owner. if you were on your knees one last time in front of simon while the larger man wagged a finger at you, you were going to put the mutt's throat between your teeth and clamp down.

but then it happened. something you had dreaded, you thought at least simon would've gotten you some birth control shots before you heat took over. you felt some embarrassed, like a fucking idiot because you were leaking all over the bed you slept in.

hybrids slept in beds like any other human, but while simon kept his minimal. yours was covered in all manners of pillows and stuffed animals. which gave you ample room to find something to put between your legs. you covered your mouth with your head as you got on your knees with the pillow between your legs.

you rutted against it, hoping that the fabric would catch your clit through your shorts. you whimpered a little but tightened your hand across your mouth. you hoped that john didn't catch the smell of your heat. the last thing you wanted was for that stupid dog to be smelling your pussy like the animal he was.

"fuck." you muttered to yourself as you found you couldn't get enough friction from the pillow. you peeled of your shorts with the crotch of your panties soaked, and put your legs on either side of the pillow once more and rutted against the edge.

you squeaked a little and panted around your hand as you rolled your hips. heat raced through your body and electricity was shot through your clit from the sensation of the pillow against it. you could only imagine the stain that would be left on the pillow by the time you were done.

your toes curled as you continued to move, you were getting lost in your head as you moved across the fabric. you let out the smalles tnoises and couldn't even stop to hear if you could hear anyone outside your door.

it was why you didn't hear the stealthy john come into your room, or creep towards you in the dark. his nose was in the air as the alluring scent of fertile hybrid filled his brain. you didn't even know he was so close until he pounced onto the bed and shoved you into the mountain of soft objects.

you yelped and tried to kick your legs out in defense, but he kept you pinned rather tightly to the bed. his nose was in your neck as he took a healthy inhale. he groaned and you felt his cock twitch against your bare ass.

you knew your pussy was getting the front of his shorts soaked.

"what do we have here?" he asked, already a little drunk from the scent, "is my girl fuckin' her pillows? bein' bad." he growled against your neck as he pushed you further into the bed, causing your hips to raise higher.

"john!" you yelped.

"that's it, doll. my precious girl. i know i tease ya, but this is worse than anything i've ever done." he said with a dark edge to his tone, "ruttin' in your bed all alone. with your mate."

you melted at the word, you hated him but the lust was clotting your brain from coherent thought. all you could feel about was the heat against you. the larger hybrid up against you.

"please, john." you whimpered, "you can't breed me. get simon."

he kissed at your neck, his fangs nipped against the back of it, he continued to rub up against you, "i don't think so, doll. i think you need me more than you need simon." his voice was low, "you need some cock." he chuckled, "my cock."

you whimpered, "please."

"don't worry, i promise i was a easy pup to rear." he chuckled lowly, "you, me and baby, quite the trio. maybe if we're lucky, we'll have two boys."

you whimpered, in your state the thought sounded alluring. you couldn't imagine alife without john in that moment. even though he bullied you, you couldn't imagine him NOT fucking you in that moment.

"ya like that don't ya, girlie. you like the idea of you being all pregnant with my pups. you'd be a lovely girl like that." he chuckled as he pulled down his shorts under his cock, freeing it.

his cock was impressive, it was large with heavy balls that showed that he'd be a good breeder. he was impressed with it and hoped it would fit in your tight virgin hole.

"here it comes, love." he said, "now be good for me, i want to feel every inch in ya." he chuckled as he guided his cock into your sweet hole, effectively ruining your virginity. he sank into it slowly and felt the air leave his chest.

"ah!" you whimpered as you buried your head further into the stuffed animals on your bed. you exhaled deeply to keep yourself relaxed so you didn't hurt yourself. but his cock was already deep in you.

"holy shit. i wished you went into heat sooner." he growled, "you feel amazin', doll. i could fuck ya forever, give ya a whole bunch of litters to take care of." he chuckled as he puffed his chest out with pride. his cock was a tight fit in you, but it felt so good. you were so wet that he slid in easily, there was no struggle to fuck his little wife.

wife, that was a term he would ever think that he'd call you. but what else would you be? a slut? his fuck hole?" the thought made him chuckle as he started to thrust in and out of you.

your eyes rolled back, his cock soothed the fire in your belly. it was what the primal part of your brain needed. you needed cock, specically HIS cock. it was the only thing that you'd allow in you. you didn't NEED simon, you just needed john to fuck the discomfort away!

easy as that, and john was happily able to do that for you. he would make you feel nice and good. he held you down by your head and you felt hot all over as he thrusted up into you. he growled and tried not to make too much noise to alert his owned.

your breathing was shaky as you clutched onto a pillow under your head. you panted heavily as you felt hot all over. this heat was almost painful and it ran like a current in your body. you felt skittish but drowning in the depths of pleasure.

"ah! please! ah!" you panted, "john, please."

"i got ya, lass." he chuckled, "don't worry. i'll make it all better. don't worry about anything." he continued to thrust in and out of you. he felt hot all over too. his head was clouded with the scent of your want for him.

his heart raced as he felt his t-shirt cling to his chest as he continued to move. you tried to meet his pace but your brain was so empty that you could barely keep up. you had never felt this full before. you whimpered so pathetically, john just knew that he would have to take care of you. after all that was what a husband did.

your lover, your husband, the father to your many, many pups. that was a title he could be proud of. it only fueled him to bury his cock deeper inside of you. the bed squeaked and john breathed heavily through his nose as his hips slapped against your ass.

"pretty thing." he purred, "bein' such a bitch all this time. but i knew better, i knew you wanted me." he chuckled a little, proud of himself that he got to bed the little birdie that has been in his home the past couple of months.

"john." you said lazily, "it feels so good." you panted wildly. you felt like there was a flat line in your head, everything kind of rolled off your tongue without thinking much of it. ypur cutn was soaked, you could feel the wetness all the way down to the back fo your thighs.

"so good." he said, "simon is gonna know how good you were for me. once you're all swollen with my puppies. keep ya nice and fat with litter after litter. i'll make sure nothin' happens to them, our little family." he panted wildly like the dog he was. he threw his head back as his hips bounced against you. his cock pushed in and out of your aching hole.

he would douse the fire in your soul, he'll simmer you down. but in exchange you'll get morning sickness and in nine months squirming hybrids in your arms. you moaned at the thought, you knew you were close to your climax.

"mine. got it?" he said, less like a question and more like a statement as he pulled your head away from the pillows. you gasped for air after being in the heat of the pillows.

you moaned loudly as you felt yourself climax around his cock. further making a mess. he growled in happiness as he gave one last thrust of his hips and he finished inside of you.

the noise must've woken up simon. because when he went into your room, he found you going at it once more. he sighed and made a note to get you some plan b in the morning. he didn't need more puppies roaming the halls of the farmhouse.

he also reminded himself to get you some birth control shots to make sure this didn't happen again.

-

simon's plan failed. it failed pretty badly. because by the time he got the birth control. it was too late, you were pregnant with john's baby. simon was thankful that it was just ONE.

at least you two got along...

"goodamnit, soap!" you shrieked.

there was a commotion in the kitchen. simon sighed and got up from his seat. he saw one very pregnant hybrid and the one who got her pregnant in the kitchen. you two were snapping jaws at one another.

"i wish you'd go back to fuckin'." he grumbled.

[infinityinakiss]

i love the haunting scene so much, cause while edwin is extinguishing flames and tossing papers like the pretty little princess he is, charles is just body slamming this dick like he's a floppy fish. thwack.

[riaki]

sick days ! gojo x reader ‧˚ - take a soda break…!

the rain outside your window is incessant.

it slides down the foggy glass panes in small rivulets that merge together and break apart, like the people outside on different paths of life. a sea of umbrellas moves like liquid in the streets below; a school of fish in a rainy city, under those fluorescent neons that shine like vibrant coral in the puddles of rain on the concrete.

there’s beauty even in the humid showers of tokyo, reflected in the broken lights and flickering signs; those food stalls full of warm life and fancy clothing stores that you always go in just to not buy anything, and best of all— the vending machines that dot the map.

watching raindrops race was one of your favorite hobbies as a kid. even now, you find yourself absentmindedly tracking the movements; the erratic nature of the blurry droplets as they slide down the glass makes you wonder if there’s hidden ridges on the panels that guide those watery paths.

your train of thought is rudely interrupted by another bout of coughing; that dry, itching feeling in your throat that you just can’t get rid of. drinking water to quell the cough has the same effect as telling your study buddy to stay focused for longer than five minutes. gojo is playing something on his phone again; a rhythm game, by the way he curses under his breath every time his fingers stutter and miss a beat.

you cover your mouth with your elbow, trying to expel the ghost dust that makes your breath hitch every time you try to speak, and he glances up at you, shifting in his seat. his lanky legs are cramped beneath the desktop; his frame doesn’t fit in your room. he has to duck when he enters, lest he hit his head like the first time he came over. like you, he has his head resting in his elbows. unlike you, he isn't ill with a fever so hot it burns cold and the stuffiness in your voice, and he also isn't studying.

"you sure you still wanna be reviewing? this exam doesn't really matter, y'know." gojo remarks, peering up at you from his arm pillow. "you should probably take a break, ’cus you look like shit."

he grins cheekily, pushing a pile of his papers and notes to the edge of the desk, where eraser shavings and broken bits of lead from when he couldn't solve a math problem are crammed. there's scratches and ink stains on the desk, a reminder of how you'd accidentally scribbled past the page’s edge in a sickness induced delirium. it’ll leave permanent marks; at this point you’re convinced you’re writing yourself a secret letter to the future. have you confessed to gojo yet? that’s what it’ll say. right now, it just says something unintelligible.

hopefully you’re still literate in the future, but you’re half-convinced you’re getting dumber every moment you spend caged in with this dunce of a genius.

you lean back in your chair, pulling your knee up to your chest. your pencil falls to the desk with a faint clack, soft yellow lamplight washing your faces warm as gojo scoots closer and peers over your shoulder at your progress. he has a pandora’s box of knowledge in that blue-tinted brain of his; he just refuses to apply it. it’s cocky, spoiled ego in the finest. you should hate him for it.

he snickers. "you're dumb."

"you missed forty-three notes." you countered, shooting him a glare as you point at the disappointed looking character next to a review of the stats from the song he was playing on his phone. gojo grimaces, pulling back like a sad little dog, floppy white hair covering his eyes.

"i was playing with my thumbs."

you ignore him, leaning against the wooden desk before hiding your face in your elbows again and letting out a long sigh. your hot breath curls up in the confines of your body, making you recoil slightly; uncomfortably. heat is the last thing you need with the fever you’re pretty sure you’re running.

"i hate being sick. and i hate studying. can we please give up?" you complained, glancing up at him out of the corner of your eye. your hair obscures your vision, so you can only see a faint glint of amusement in his azure irises as he studies you for a moment before scooting his chair back and standing up. without another word, he leaves the room.

wow. okay.

a moment of silence passes as you sit there, lamenting over your runny nose and the way you sound like you're about to cough a lung up every time you breathe, until you hear the soft sounds of his feet padding on the floorboards coupled with what you presume is ice clinking against glass, signaling his return. you lift your head, blinking blearily. each time you breathe in through your nose, your nostrils burn like dry ice pressed against your skin, only adding to your misery. the dreary weather outside isn't helping much, either.

the cold glass leaves a dark stain on the table, an uneven circle of condensation that soothes the aching in your fingers when your sick skin makes contact. gojo pops the can open, and you watch as he picks the glass up, tilting it to the side to pour the soda in.

“why are you holding it like that?” you asked curiously, a small yawn escaping your lips as you lean against the table. he glances down at you, a cheeky, tiny smile gracing his lips. the sound of bubbles fizzling and popping fills the cozy, cramped room; that cool, sweet liquid seems like the only thing that’ll cure your nasty cough.

“pouring it like this prevents the bubbles from escaping. you like it fizzy, don’t you?” he grins.

condensation clings to his fingers like morning dew upon flower petals as he sets the glass down. you watch the ice cubes bobble about in the soda, clinking against the cup like a mini wind chime. you’re sore from sitting in the same place with terrible posture for three hours, and there’s an ache between your fingers from gripping your pencil tight while you write.

you take a sip from the glass, letting out a contented sigh as the refreshing liquid drains down your scratchy throat. it’s not lemon honey tea for a cold, but it certainly helps. next to you, gojo takes his seat again, grabbing the throw blanket on your bed and tossing it over his legs before he grabs his pencil again. he’s using one of those short pencils, shaved down to a stub from months of use. you always offer him a mechanical pencil, but he refuses.

you sit there, waiting for him to get back to work before you realize he’s staring at you, legs crossed beneath the fuzzy blanket.

you frowned, shifting to face him as you lean against the desk. “what?”

“you’ll take care of me if i get sick too, right?” he tilts his head, like a curious bird.

“why would you get sick?”

you’re too relate to react when he makes a mad grab for your glass of soda, holding it out of your reach. a few droplets spill out and spatter onto your notebook, forcing a sigh from your lips.

“gojo…” you groaned, rubbing your temple with your fingers and praying for strength.

he just smirks, taking a lengthy sip. you watch his adam’s apple bob as a bit of condensation builds on his chin and trickles down his throat.

“you know what? i dont feel like studying either.” he announces, setting the glass back down on the wooden table with a loud thunk.

“so? what do you wanna do?” you huffed petulantly.

“download project sekai, and we can do a co-op live.”

“…you’re kidding.”

[beansprean]

Happy Mer-May!! Why not an extremely loosely interpreted Little Mermaid au? Starring Guillermo as a harbor seal who dreams of living in the deep, Wallace as an opportunistic mimic octopus, Colin as a parasitic lamprey, Laszlo as a lazy little snaggletooth, Nadja as a vicious sloane’s viperfish, and Nandor as a spiny black dragonfish. Deep sea fishes truly the vampires of the sea.

"Betcha down there

that they don't care

Bet they don't

mind a couple slaughters..."

(ID in alt and under cut)

ID: 1a. Underwater full body shot of mermaid Guillermo swimming past. He has the tail of a light brown harbor seal, webbed fingers, and small floppy ears that are held closed. He has a line of kelp tied around him like a bandolier and is looking around determinedly, brandishing a wooden stake in one hand. 1b. Full body of Guillermo lounging on his side on a flat rock above the water, one arm tucked under his head and the other held to his side like a flipper. He sighs forlornly. 1c. Full body of Guillermo on an algae-covered rock sticking above the ocean's surface, waves cresting around him as he lifts up his torso little-mermaid style and sings out "part of your world".

2. Full body of mermaids Colin, Laszlo, Nadja, and Nandor floating in a line, the ocean behind them very dark. Colin has the slick beige and cream tail of a lamprey, webbing beneath his arms, and gill pores dotted down each side of his torso and neck. He grins and wiggles his webbed fingers at the viewer in a wave. Behind him is a smaller shot of Colin with his mouth open, revealing multiple circular rows of sharp teeth around a sucking maw. Laszlo has the tail of a snaggletooth or stareater, his anterior side patterned in teal and black scales up to his chest, lighter teal scales dotting up his neck and shoulders, and brighter teal fins. He has a pair of gills on either side of his neck, sharp black claws on each webbed finger, and green bioluminescent spots running from wrists to tailfin on either side. He floats with a smug grin, arms crossed and back-to-back with his wife. Nadja has the tail of a Sloane's viperfish, her anterior side patterned in dull garnet and black scales up to her chest, lighter dull garnet scales dotting up her neck and shoulders, and brighter rose fins. Her fins and tail are similar to Laszlo's in style, but larger and longer with a posterior barbel. She has a pair of gills on either side of her neck, sharp red claws on each webbed finger, long fangs poking up from her lower jaw, and double lines of red bioluminescent spots running from wrists to tailfin on either side. She is grinning to show off her fangs, floating back to back with her husband. One of her webbed hands is raised to bare her claws, long black hair swirling in the water around her. Nandor has the tail of a black dragonfish, his anterior side patterned in dark blue and black speckling up to his chest, lighter blue scales dotting up his neck and shoulders, and black spines with translucent blue webbing over his shoulders and down either side of his long winding tail, ending in a small forked fin. He has a pair of gills on either side of his neck, sharp claws on each webbed finger, and gold bioluminescent spots running from wrists to tailfin on either side with double lines on his torso. he is floating nervously, looking around and twiddling his hands together.

3a. Mermaid Wallace, with the tentacles of a mimic octopus below the waist, floats underwater next to mermaid Guillermo. They are wearing a woven vest studded with shells and pearls, a black doppa hat with puka shells, a pearl necklace, a pendant with a claw, and several rings on unwebbed fingers. Their tentacles are relaxed, colored in the usual brick and cream stripes, and they have black claws and small horns above each eye. Wallace grins slyly as they wave their arms mysteriously and dangle a necklace in front of Guillermo’s face. It is a simple braided string with a snail shell on the end, which is glowing bright blue and burping out shiny bubbles. Guillermo, wearing a kelp bandolier with two stakes tied into it at his hip is staring at it with wide, fascinated eyes, one hand reaching up slowly for it. He says, “So…this will let me survive in the Trench?” Wallace replies, “Guaranteed.” 3b. Repeat. Wallace suddenly snatches the necklace back into their hand, cutting off the glow, their other hand planting itself on their hip. Their tentacles darken into black and bright crimson stripes and fan out threateningly in the water as they clarify, “For 72 hours only. And $350 cash.” Guillermo snatches his hands back to hold them protectively against his chest, head sinking into his shoulders in shock as he frowns back up at Wallace.

4a. Mermaid Guillermo and mermaid Laszlo float side by side in the deep, Guillermo wearing his kelp bandolier and Wallace’s magic snail shell necklace, which continues to burp out small glowing blue bubbles. Laszlo bares his fangs upwards and tosses up his hands as if to amplify his voice, shouting, “Fish!” Startled, Guillermo jerks back, one hand half-raising in a readied fist and the other clutching a stake behind his back. 4b. Repeat. With a poof of bubbles, Laszlo transforms into a brightly glowing dark teal snaggletooth fish with bulging eyes, a chin barbel, an unhingeable jaw full of long sharp teeth, and bioluminescent green spots down each side. He looks to be about four inches (or 10cm) long. Guillermo immediately relaxes, unimpressed, and drops his arms while staring at the tiny fish with a “you’ve got to be kidding me” expression. Fish Laszlo squeaks, “Not so tough now, eh??”

5a. Close up of mermaid Nandor in hunting mode, rushing left across the screen, his bioluminescent spots and glowing red eyes streaking light behind as he goes. He has one arm rushing forward as if to snatch whatever he’s chasing and the other held braced and ready at his shoulder, claws bared. He has spiny webbing like a bat’s wing underneath each arm, a spiny fin for an ear,and the webbed black spines at his shoulders have lengthened and spread out like an angry frilled lizard. His jaw has unhinged and gaped open, morphing and stretching his face into something monstrous and revealing dozens of long, sharp, thin teeth snarling and ready for the kill. 5b. Mermaid Guillermo floats nearby watching, eyes bulging out and face blushing bright red as he clutches the snail shell necklace in his laced fingers as if it were a rosary. He is fully into this. /end ID

[yaksha-lover]

Good evening and happy holidays! Since we’re in that season again, would it be alright if I asked for a short little story about some winter fun with the twisted wonderland first years? Like getting into a snowball fight or something?

happy holidays!! ofc, thanks for the request it was sm fun to write, i love these idiots <33

“There’s no point in having this farce of a ‘fight,’ as you call it. My superior fae genes will clearly allow me to sweep the competition, securing victory for my team and liege, and-”

A snowball smacks Sebek directly in the face, causing him to still. The wetness of the melted snow is only mildly uncomfortable, until Ace hits him with another one, this time lower so the snow falls inside his jacket instead of away from him. He twitches at the cold snow that slides against his bare skin, before scrambling to fish it out.

“That second shot was just mean,” you scold Ace, but you can’t help but snicker.

“You know you love me~”

Ace stops laughing when Deuce hits the back of his bare neck with another snowball, causing his shoulders to scrunch up.

“Dude, what the hell?”

“That’s for my teammate,” Deuce yells from across the field.

“Teammate takes priority over best friend now? And here I thought we were actually getting close…”

Like the jerk he is, Ace takes advantage of Deuce’s momentary guilt to chuck his own snowball and hit Deuce square in the face.

“Heartless, truly,” you remark, shaking your head.

“Just be thankful you ended up on my team, MC.”

“Ace is right,” Epel says, still crouching behind your snow fort and working on the stash of snowballs for you and Ace to throw. “Better to have him as our friend than our enemy.”

“I don’t know. They have Jack, I feel like he could’ve been a solid ally instead,” you say.

Across the field, you hear Ortho speak. “Jack Howl, your heart rate has suddenly increased. Have you encountered a stressful stimulus?”

You don’t get to hear his response, but you peak over the top of the fort to catch sight of his suddenly floppy ears.

“You’re the meanie.” Ace sticks his tongue out at you.

“You know you love me,” you mock his previous words.

“Maybe…” he mumbles, but you’re too busy deciding your next target to notice.

Sebek still has his jacket unzipped, trying to stop the snow from making his clothes more wet. You’ll take pity on him, you suppose. For now.

Ortho had to be put on a separate third team for the safety (and feasibility of winning) of everyone else involved. He’s only allowed to throw one snowball every minute, but you assume he’s been waiting for more of the action to start cranking it up. He’s only hit each of you a couple of times, after all. Best not to provoke him and his small (but surprisingly strong with perfect aim) robot arms.

Deuce or Jack, then. Both of them are sweeties, but this is a battle, and hard choices must be made.

You turn to Epel, motioning. He smiles as he places a snowball in your hand. “Go get-’em tiger.”

You rise above the fort, now equipped with your weapon. You make eye contact with Deuce as he nervously eyes the snowball in his hand, the one in your hand, and then you.

Deuce’s eyes widen. “Not you too, MC.”

“I’m sorry, Deuce. All is fair in love and war.”

“I thought we-”

The snowball leaves your hand, flying across the field and hitting him in the chest. He falls to his knees, disappearing behind the fort.

“Deuce Spade has fallen,” Ortho remarks, perhaps too cheerfully.

“And you said I was the mean one? I think you just broke Deuce’s heart with that betrayal. At least he expects it from me,” Ace snickers.

“In the game of snowball fights, you win or you die.”

“Maybe you need to watch less tv.” Epel pats you on the back.

“Is the game truly beginning now? How exciting.” A chill, stronger than any one provoked by snow, runs down your spine. Ortho picks up several snowballs at a time. Quickly and brutally, he takes all of you out with his effective aim. Even hiding behind the wall of the fort, Ortho is able to angle the snowball to make it over the wall and hit Epel. You’re sure the other team faces similar loses.

“Gahh!! Forfeit! You win, just make it stop,” Epel cries out.

-

“No hard feelings?”

“None.” Deuce shyly smiles at you. “Well, maybe none if you promise to get hot chocolate with me after classes tomorrow.”

“Deal, as long as we can go to the place with the marshmallows I like. You know, the small ones that provide just enough marshmallow without making it marshmallows with a side of hot chocolate.”

“Sounds good to me.”

“You wanna invite Ace too? Or the others? I think Sebek mentioned he’s never actually tried hot chocolate before.”

“Actually, I was thinking-”

Ace interrupts your conversation, slotting himself between you two and draping his arms across both of your shoulders.

“Are my friends really making plans without me now?”

You roll your eyes. “And if we were?”

He takes his arm off Deuce to place a hand on his chest in a mocking gesture. “Gasp. Heartbreak. Betrayal.”

“Yeah, yeah. Deuce just asked me, I’m sure he was about to tell you too.”

“Yeah,” Deuce says. “You should…you should come.”

“I’ll text Epel, Jack, and Sebek, then. Epel might have spelldrive practice, but if I spin the hangout to be something practical he can do to improve for Malleus, Sebek might actually come.”

“Ortho might want to come too. Although, I guess he can’t ingest the hot chocolate…” Deuce wonders aloud.

“Nah, Idia has custody of Ortho tomorrow. He said I already ‘stole him away’ too long this week. Why can’t he accept I also want to have a little brother?”

“Right…” Ace and Deuce exchange looks like you’re crazy.

“Anyway, I think you and Jack should treat us since you lost.” You swipe off the snow that’s fallen on your jacket.

“We lost?!” Deuce looks incredulous.

“You heard me.”

“Yeah, Deuce-y. You lost,” Ace laughs.

“Nuh uh.”

“Did you just- whatever, I’m sure Jack will own up to your crushing defeat.”

“Hmm, if anything, I think Ortho won. He got more hits than anyone,” Deuce says.

“True,” you and Ace say synchronously.

Ace looks at the time on his phone. “Basketball practice is starting soon, I better go before Floyd tracks me down.”

You and Deuce wave him goodbye. You tell Deuce you can go the rest of the way yourself, but he insists on walking you all the way back to Ramshackle (‘What if you slip and fall on the ice? Who’s gonna call for help then?’)

“Maybe we’ll switch things up next time, and you and I will be on the same team, MC.”

“I’d like that.” You smile back at him.

“Well-” Deuce starts as you arrive at your door.

“Wait here,” you say. You run inside to grab something for him.

“You don’t have to-” he says as you wrap your scarf around his neck.

“You expect me to watch you shiver some more?”

Deuce looks away. You can’t tell if the flush on his cheeks is from embarrassment or the cold.

“I’ll give it back tomorrow, then.”

“No, keep it. It…It looks nice on you,” you say.

Somehow, Deuce’s cheeks get even redder.

[violets-and-books]

The Crows at the beach

Kaz:

Ultimate mum friend

Doesn't go near the water but finds a spot for all their stuff and guards it with his life

Has 7 individual water bottles, each named and coloured a different colour

The only time you will ever see him in a T-shirt

This man wears jeans to the beach and you can't change my mind

Has 5 towels and also a picnic blanket to sit on

Has individual snacks for each person in tupperware

Only ever gets up from his seat to chase Jesper up and down the beach with suncream

Will deny being a mum friend no matter what but everyone knows the truth

Inej:

Sits with her sunnies on a towel and reads a book

Has an appropriate amount of suncream on and never forgets to top up

Buys everyone ice creams at the end of the day

Plays volleyball and tennis with Jesper, Nina and Matthias

Wades in the shallows with Jesper and splashes him a lot

Tries to tease Kaz into building a sandcastle with her

Convinces Nina to put suncream on

Wears a cute top and shorts

Jesper:

Speedo. He wears a speedo (much to everyone's disappointment)

Refuses to wear suncream but after being chased all along the length and breadth of the beach by Kaz gives in

Teases Wylan on the car ride there and back and gets a towel in the face both times

Once he gets in the sea, you have to fish him out with a net

Plays volleyball and tennis with Inej, Nina and Matthias. He and Inej lose. Jesper's a sore loser

Decorates Wylan and Kuwei's sandcastles

Wylan:

Takes about 100 pictures of the beach, the sky, the sea, everything

Wears a T-shirt, swim shorts and sunnies

Will throw sand at anyone if provoked

Doesn't go in the water until Jesper drags him into the shallows. Then you can't get him out

Searches for rock pools with Kuwei

Finds and keeps any shiny rocks or shells or pieces of sea glass he finds

Has a very serious sandcastle-building competition with Kuwei

Tries to get Kaz to judge the competition and fails

Pushes Kuwei over in the shallows and then runs for his life

Nina:

Wears a bikini and one of those massive floppy hats

Will not put suncream on, she wants to tan

Immediately throws herself down on a towel to sunbathe and falls asleep

Buys everyone fish and chips at lunch

Plays loads of sports with Matthias, Inej and Jesper

Takes a load of beach selfies

Will swim but only if she's not swimming alone

Buys one of those ships in bottles you get from the seaside. She has seven already

Won't drink water unless cajoled into it

Tries and fails to get Matthias to recreate a scene from Titanic

Always complains about being hungry and wanting ice cream

Matthias:

Tried to wear jeans to the beach but was attacked by Nina and a pair of swimming trunks

Spends most of his time building a model of the Ice Court in the sand

Puts on way too much suncream

Complains about the heat to anyone who will listen (no one does)

Don't let him near the water, you'll lose him forever

Judges Wylan and Kuwei's sandcastle competition

Decides it's a draw (so he doesn't get murdered by either)

Absolutely thrashes Jesper at volleyball, tennis and pretty much any sport Jesper challenges him to

Tries to climb the rocks in his swimming trunks and nothing else

Convinces Nina to drink water

Kuwei:

Has swimming trunks with little flames on them

Goes searching in rock pools with Wylan

Snorkels for hours but gets too excited whenever he sees a fish and swallows a mouthful of water

Chases Wylan for half an hour after he pushed him in the shallows

Collects shells only to lose them before they go home

Talks to Wylan about all the fish he's seen. They try to identify them

Tries flirting with Jesper and gets pushed in the shallows (again) because of it

Builds too many sandcastles and then destroys them all on purpose, laughing at the chaos

Climbs one rock and declares himself King of the World

[cocomochicakes]

After watching the BG3 Epilogue, now have a new Ascended!Astarion Headcanon:

Even though he's supposed to be this almighty and terrifyingly powerful Vampire Lord, if by chance he overindulges in wine, Astarion can't control his transformation into a bat.

Because of this Vampire Bride!Tav has to scoop this little white drunken, floppy bat off the floor or fish him out from laying head-first in a goblet to carry him home in a satchel since he can't fly more than a few feet without spiraling into something.

Just imagine Batstarion trying to take flight but being so inebriated he thinks he's flying up and over a tree but instead he's just spiraling hard left into a bunch of bushes and Tav just sighs and goes over to go pick him up before he runs into something else or transforms mid flight and falls into a pile of crates again.

[bogleech]

Bug toys I would try to crowdfund if I had the right connections to produce original *cheap, bulk* rubber or plastic objects (which is still seemingly unattainable compared to having pins or plushes made)

Rubber ducky isopod that works as a rubber ducky

translucent ticks and fleas with fake blood sloshing around inside

Extremely simple big floppy rubbery bugs like any cheap toy spider but of lesser known things like whip spiders and scorpionflies

Bendy velvet worm

Fish that when you squeeze it the tongue biter pops out of its mouth

Clear plastic planktonic crustaceans and brine shrimp that really float in water

Little accurate figures of different insects after their parasitic mushrooms sprouted

Shiny metallic silverfish roughly the size of typical fake roaches

Cheap rubber roaches but of more exotic species

Just a bouncy rubber ball modeled like a curled up isopod

Various things with accurate mandibles or pincers that work like clips so you can clip them on your clothes or hair

People always suggest 3d printing and casting and stuff but Im already getting into that, the problem is I dream of being able to have thousands made so everyone can have one for just a few bucks rather than a $30 limited edition Etsy art piece. I wouldn't even copyright these kinds of things or at least not for long, I'd want them to multiply freely across toy and novelty markets