#meaning trans and bi and pan people

[tracle0]

Feast your eyes! My pride stars :)!

[x-v4mp3y3lin3r-x]

if you're deconstructing your ideas of binary gender and binary sex— you also have to deconstruct your ideas of binary sexuality and romantic attraction, too, fyi

[kwyoz]

omgg YESSS pansexual romances!!!

if any of you call them playersexual im going to fucking haunt you.

[neck-thats-made-for-bruising]

So I have realized of my best friends (?) is like,, kinda mean and I feel so uncomfortable

shes saying things like 'eww the pimples in his hairline are sooo gross he probably doesn't even wash his face' and I've learned that if people are making fun of someone but I don't want to say it's mean, I just say something about myself so I said 'oh yeah I have lots of pimples in my hairline cause my hair is really oily' and she said well yeah but that's different

and then today our class smelled like fish (it's also a cooking class) and she started saying it was one of the girls and I felt really bad and then another girl said it's proably you (to my friend) and she got upset but I mean she was doing it to someone else so

asdfkjshda teenagers are really fucking mean

[dramaticsigh]

Happy Pride to all the bi and pansexual people who don’t know the difference between the two sexualities and at this point are too afraid to ask

[perfect-bi-paradise]

The cring biphobia on Tumblr is so bad even Twitter can't handle it!

The anon cringe:

People are so desperate to erase bisexuality it's unreal and they're willing to erase POC bisexuals who have been in the bisexual community from the beginning! I hope anon stretched before making this ridiculous reach!

[demi-bi-bi]

Just a reminder that the whole "pansexuality is biphobic and transphobic" is an outdated argument and people can call themselves however they want if it makes them feel comfortable.

If you can't accept that then you're a grown ass child.

[butchladymaria]

I agree with your list ! People being asshole about lesbian & other headcanons gtfo! That list could work for many other things too.

But to be sure everyone don’t mix thing up i just want to point out that not liking/ not being fan of an headcanon don’t equal  being an ass about it. It’s the mean actions or words afterwards that are bad. 

hey! i’m glad you found it generalizable. there’s a lot of things on there that get used against pretty much any “diverse” perspectives both inside and out of fan spaces. as for your second point, i don’t disagree with you. there are some queer headcanons that i don’t personally hold, but i’m going to be cheering them on rather than contributing to the negativity we face on a regular basis. you can personally hold a different headcanon without being a jerk.

this is not @ you anon, but there are a lot of people who believe that underrepresented groups seeing themselves in characters — whether through the lens of race, gender, sexuality, disability, etc — is “politicizing” fandom and ruining it somehow, as though a white/cishet/male/abled perspective is the default in art and anything else is “tainting” the “pure” fanspace. some of them might believe those voices can exist — so long as they keep their heads down and don’t take up too much space. the fact of the matter is that’s a bigoted thing to believe. our existence has been politicized against our will. for the marginalized, fan spaces are just another front we have to push to participate in. if someone finds themself constantly disliking one specific type of queer/nonwhite/disabled/etc. headcanon and feels the need to say over and over how much they don’t like it, they ought to seriously interrogate why that is.

[whilomm]

just bc of stuff going around i was suddenly reminded of one of the stupidest bits of bi discourse i saw, no idea if it was widespread at all or if it was just a few very loud and adamant ppl, where ppl were so angry about pan stuff again that they decided that the best way to defeat the evil pans was to make bisexuality The Most Inclusive and said that it was biphobic+nbphobic to define bi as ANYTHING BUT "attraction regardless of gender". no "attraction to multiple genders" thats NOT ALLOWED ANYMORE bc of course sexualities are basically just markers of How Inclusive You Are™ and not like. guidelines for what sorta ppl ur into right.

so it was like. okay im nonbinary and attracted to men a lot and women a good bit and other nonbinary ppl a lil less usually so im bi an-

"dont you mean you are attracted to people REGARDLESS OF GENDER? because that is the ONE TRUE DEFINITION OF BI"

Uhh. no gender is. definitely a factor, not in a full stop way or nothin its a lil wibbly but its not regardles-

"then you arent bi and its kinda biphobic and nbphobic that u are insinuating bi is anything but The Most Inclusive with full attraction equality for All Gender :/"

...okay then uh. what i am, a nonbinary person attracted to multiple genders, but not REGARDLESS of gender, supposed to call myself?

"idk just die ig"

[urfaveautisticlesbian]

I may lose followers for this but sometimes I wish I was back in 2014/2015 bc I think I’d rather the discourse from then than the weird lgbt discourse we have now. I feel like our unity in online communities is diminished or slowly fading into oblivion. What the fuck happened

[heroesbrine]

no way i just saw a whole ass adult use "pannie" derogatorily towards pansexuals without an inch of irony. can we grow up please. that is such a childish insult to use in genuine anger. i thought we were over this years ago

[gender-euphowrya]

can we just all agree that both bi & pan as labels don't have strict universal definitions that everyone will agree on and that trying to make them into rigid boxes to shove people into regardless of their own perception of both those words and themselves is actually fucking terrible

they'll mean different things to different people and some people will prefer one over the other and guess what. it literally does not matter in the slightest

[incognitopolls]

This is not a perfect list; gender and orientation can be much more nuanced than we can represent in a tumblr poll. For instance, you can be aromantic and bi, or you can be not really cis but not consider yourself trans. Please choose the answer that is the closest, and you're welcome to clarify in the tags.

Cis means you identify as the gender you were assigned at birth.

Trans is an umbrella term that means you do not identify with your assigned gender, and includes all genders that are not cis man or cis woman. this includes nonbinary, genderfluid, etc.

Mspec stands for multiple-spectrum and is an umbrella term for anyone who likes more than one gender. this includes bi, pan, omni, poly(sexual/romantic, not referring to polygamous or polyamorous), and many others.

–

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[genderqueerdykes]

a long time ago, my roommates had an argument over whether or not hamburgers are sandwiches. this actually got heated to the point of one of the guys having to get upset and walk away because he was convinced that hamburgers are not sandwich, but instead their own classification of food.

people will pick any hill to die on- we as a species cannot 100% all agree on the definition of anything. that's why we can't agree on the definition of gay, queer, lesbian, trans, bi, pan, aromantic, asexual, etc. because we as a species just can't do that. we all have a unique perspective on what concepts are and what they mean.

if we can't agree on whether or not a hamburger is a sandwich or not, i think it's best if we learn to agree to disagree on what the "true" meaning of gay, lesbian, trans, queer, etc. are and just let people live their version of that identity in peace. at the end of the day it literally doesn't matter if you don't know if a hamburger is a sandwich or just a hamburger- you're still going to eat it and gain nutrients from it.

a trans person having a different definition of trans than you, or a lesbian defining lesbianism differently than what they've been told, or any other type of queer person defining their identity in their own way isn't a threat to you- at the end of the day, it doesn't stop them from being trans, a lesbian, queer, or whatever. disagreeing on the definition won't stop it from happening; it's just petty. not every hill is meant for someone to die on. let go

[elvhenmage]

this may not go over well but i want to say something before dav comes out because this GI article quote is really bothering me:

"As pansexual companions, they are attracted to people of any gender (or regardless of gender)."

bisexuality and pansexuality are functionally the same thing. both sexualities are defined by being attracted to people of any gender and/or regardless of gender. i don't care if you personally identify as pan, i’m not attacking the label itself here because that’s not the point. i’m just saying they mean the same thing and i'm asking all of you in advance (especially people who are not bisexual) to please be careful with the way you talk about bisexuality wrt pansexuality because it is unfortunately very common for pansexuality to be lauded as "more progressive" than bisexuality by people who don't know bi history.

bisexuality has been documented since at least the 70s to be trans/nb inclusive and to not be limited by gender or sexuality. pansexuality is not more progressive than bisexuality. they're the same. please do not bring back the "hearts not parts" mentality. okay? cool.

here's some links to check out: one, two, three, four, five

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am i the A-hole for trying to protect a women focused space?

I'm the mod from the super one sided retelling of the "Refusing to change OC's sexuality to bi/pan" situation. Shin (the person who wrote that post) know i don't use tumblr so of course he bring the drama here so that people would judge "Laura" and me without knowing the full truth. Thankfully, a dear friend of mine who followed this blog told me about this and was kind enough to allowed me to send this ask using her account.

First of all, it's pretty clear that Shin is lying about his identity. Shin said he is a trans man but he admitted that he don't want to transition beside wanting flat chest. Shin also said that he is south east asian but his display name and his OC's name are all japanese, which is a huge sign of white weeb fetishizing japanese culture. The fact that his english and understanding of slangs is way too good to be south east asian.

Secondly, Shin joining this server knowing that 90% of the members are yumejoshi, he should be grateful of the fact that we even allowed those yaoi characters invading what basically a space for women. I know we advertised the RP as a non-shipping focus death game story but you should have read the room and know what type of people this space is catering to and not bring your gay character in if you didn't want him to be shipped with women.

Thirdly, if Shin was uncomfortable then he should have made it clear from the start instead of letting "Laura"s character flirting with his, like having him respond rudely or out right rejecting her or something. Shin said he is having undiagnosed autism in his bio then he should have understand how it feel when people don't state what they mean clearly. His OC still being nice to "Laura"'s OC even if he didn't like the flirting, of course she would misunderstand that his OC developed romantic feeling for her OC.

Fourthly, Shin said before that he didn't count alternate timeline versions of a character from a visual novel he likes the same as the original timeline version because of their different life experiences then why can't he do the same to his OC? Why can't he just agree to let "Laura" make an alternate version of his character if in his logic they are completely different people? Hypocrite much?

And finally, "Laura" was very upset about this and it took her a while to move on, she could have hurt herself back then because of you. Also, we had to revised our server's rules and banned all the non-yumejoshies, which cut several RPs short.

So who is really the A-hole here?